#it was way longer than expected lmao

[clownsuu]

Hey I'm Panic, and it's time to Gay!

Biblically accurate gay people jumpscare

[blinkees]

whenever you feel like it, could you make a blinkie of your favorite pokemon from each type? <3 i think it'd be fun to see

[killerpancakeburger]

Attending a wizards soiree with Rolan headcanons

You know he's been planning this for weeks. He talks about it non-stop, he paces the room about it, he makes checklists, etc.

Lia and Cal are so done with him, they're just begging for that goddamn event to happen already.

To an unexperienced eye, he's making this a big deal to show off his current accomplishments and status. But you know he's actually anxious about it, even if he would never admit it. So you need to reassure him here and there with encouraging statements without being TOO obvious about it. It's all an art.

Obviously you're going with him - he asked you to. With a lot of flourish. He was so stern about it, you thought something was wrong at first. But after you said yes, he couldn’t hide his relief and happiness from shining on his face. Yes, there was an insecure, illogical part of him who feared you'd refuse. (Once again he would never admit it)

At some point during the evening you get separated. In the group you're in an old wizard spits out very incorrect facts about a specific, obscure branch of magic and the others seem to nod along only because he says it with a lot of assurance and because he's famous and respected. You tranquilly correct him, causing a bit of a scene as he storms off grumbling about the youth nowadays but no one else is hostile to you since you were right.

Soon after Rolan comes to find you, admitting he's impressed with your knowledge but not understanding where you got it from. You stare at him with confusion, raising an inquisitive eyebrow. "What do you mean? You talked about it at great length just the other day." And Rolan gets speechless at the idea of you not only listening to his lengthy speeches on magic but also remembering them to that level.

He decides you both need to go back to the Tower Right Now because he's so proud and flattered and turned on it feels like his chest is gonna explode. Tail swaying hard.

You were already distracting enough in your fancy outfit, thank you. He can’t take more. Even though he chose said outfit.

It's not HIS fault he didn’t expect you to look so good in it. He turned red and speechless when you appeared in it, and ended up saying something rude - "Didn’t know you could actually clean up that good" or Something.

Cal and Lia are ripping their hair off/rolling their eyes in front of that desolating spectacle and intervene - "What my dear brother ACTUALLY meant to say is that you look breathtaking tonight."

[astyr-art]

i drew this for tiktok and wasnt rly planning on posting it anywhere else cuz ~aspect ratio~ but it BLEW TF UP (just like jason) on there so tumblr gets it too lmao

plz note that i can count the number of comics ive read on one hand (im working on changing that but still) and none of them involving these two, so what i know abt them ive learned from the fandom. im aware this probably feels ooc/fanon. but i had the idea and thought "thatd be funny" which means i legally had to draw it

this was also my first time ever drawing both jason AND tim and its a whole ass animatic. why do i do these things to myself (for the bit thats why lmao)

[palmettoshitposts]

(it might look blurry but should be fine if you zoom in! 🧡)

[guppygiggles]

Null is scary /j

Especially with how merciless you describe him to be… I’m both curious and terrified to find out what it would be like to be wrecked by him!

Despite this however, I think that sweet robot deserves a big hug 😽💗

He’s still getting used to the whole physical affection thing, but he’s got the spirit~

[xen-xiv]

Xen XIII

Xen recounts their time spent on Redna's fishing ship after the Seventh Umbral Calamity.

This is the first fic of Xen I've written. It effectively just functions as her backstory. This takes place between the end of 1.0 and the start of 2.0, but does make use of lore from later expansions. There's no explicit spoilers but some things probably won't make sense if you haven't finished Shadowbringers.

Features @frogliftcertified's OC Nova, and @goblin-gal-pal's OCs Ariah and Ella (though their names aren't said)

My name is Xen, Thirteenth of my line. And this is the end of my story.

It was all a blur at first. Darkness. A battle. A meteor falling from the sky. A huge winged beast bursting from within it, raining destruction all around. And a sad cat watching the lights from a ship far away.

.....

My head was pounding. My chest felt heavy. The whole world felt like it was moving around me. Rocking back and forth. It actually was.

I was on a ship. In bed in what looked like the captain's quarters. I stood up from the bed and nearly fell back into it. It was a struggle to stand, my body wasn't moving like my mind thought it should.

I managed to get myself to a window on the back wall. We were out at sea, I could see the open ocean behind us. And I saw that sad cat in the window staring back at me. She looked just as confused as I felt. She was me. It was clearly my reflection but-

The door opened behind me. "Oh good, you're up. You gave us a scare, kid." It was an older tall cat woman. She gave me a brief smile before walking over to her desk. I asked where I was and she looked back with an eyebrow raised. "You're in my quarters. You've been out a couple days. Hit your head hard when that big wave rocked the boat. So I gave you a more comfortable bed to rest in. You're welcome, Rahks." She smirked and began to search through a drawer.

Rahks? That wasn't my name. I corrected the captain, and she gave me another confused look. "What do you- Oh! You picked a new one already, eh?" A warm smile. "I like it, Xen. Got a new surname too?"

That just confused me more. I asked Captain Kairisch what she meant by-

How did I know her name?

A sharp pain in my head. Unfamiliar memories flooded into my mind. Home. Family. The forest. That terrifying first hunt. Running away. The professor. Learning magic. Then the moon began to fall. War. A request for help. Fear. Running away again. The captain.

When I came to the captain's hand was on my shoulder, she'd caught me before I fell and helped me back to the bed. "Easy, Xen. I'll get you somethin' to eat. Just get some more rest for now." The hrothgar woman gave another smile before heading out the door.

I laid back down and collected my thoughts. Things made more sense now. I remembered I was on the Liljefisker, captained by Redna Kairisch. A fishing vessel that had docked at Limsa Lominsa. I remembered signing up. Thiking that I couldn't stay in Eorzea, not while the red moon was hanging in the sky like that. A week after we set off it fell. I remembered seeing the lights even from out that far. Someone shouted that a big wave was coming, and then I blacked out.

I went over it all in my head a few times. It felt off at first, but the memories eventually settled back in. But where did my name come from? Redna was right, I remembered having the name Rahks before. I remembered wanting a new one but not having any ideas yet. But since waking up my name being Xen is the thing I was the most sure of.

Redna came back with a hot meal. She told me the chef and some other crewmates who were around were all fans of my new name. I decided not to worry about where it came from.

We were still about a week away from the next port. It was Garlean territory, but the captain was sure we could find out what happened back in Eorzea once we were there.

I finished my meal, and Redna got me a change of clothes, and we went out on deck. I remembered not talking with the rest of the crew much since we set sail, but they were all happy to see me up and about again. Captain Kairisch insisted I take it easy for the day, and offered to let me take her bed again that night, but after food and time for my head to settle I was feeling better.

I slept in my bunk that night. I remembered sleeping there before but it still felt unfamiliar. It had been a strange day, I tried not to worry about it.

My dream almost felt more real than anything else.

Things were back to business as usual for the next week. There was some unease about Eorzea's fate (though some said the mood was improved with me awake again) and the crew talked about what could've possibly happened with Dalamud.

The captain recruited from all over. Two others, both refugees from Ala Mhigo, had signed on at the same time as me in Limsa. There was a former Ishgardian temple knight who joined the last time Redna stopped in Eorzea. Folks from Doma, Dalmasca, Thavnair, even someone from the New World was on board.

I quickly realized I was the youngest one on the ship. They all certainly treated me like a child. I wanted to argue against this, but I remembered having not even seen twenty summers, so I saw their point.

Eventually we made it into port, and we learned the news. The elder primal that was inside the red moon, and how it razed the land. They were calling it the Seventh Umbral Calamity.

The Garleans suffered heavy casualties, and while there wasn't concrete news it seemed the Eorzean Alliance didn't fare any better.

I remembered some people who would have been fighting with the Alliance. I didn't feel like I knew them, but I hoped they were okay.

We sold off our catches, stocked up on supplies, and after a couple days we set off again.

Things continued like this. We'd spend a few moons out at sea, catching what we could, then we'd pull back into the nearest port to sell and stock up.

Out at sea we'd sing shanties, and at night everyone shared stories. Stories of what they'd done before joining up with Redna. Obrelle the former temple knight told us of the time she fought dragons alongside the Azure Dragoon.

Redna's stories were some of the most exciting to hear. She talked about her time as a pirate in the Far East, under the flag of Captain Kairi Kuroyuri, the Black Lily.

They asked me to tell stories of my own. I was hesitant. The memories still felt unfamiliar, and there wasn't much to tell, but they insisted. So I told them about what I remembered from my time at the school, learning magic from Professor Nova Dubois.

I remembered coming to Ul'dah after leaving home. I heard rumors there about a Gyr Abanian mage whose body had been transformed. I remembered following after these rumors and finding Nova. She taught classes on thaumaturgy and I somehow found myself attending them.

I remembered when I was finally able to ask her about the rumors. She explained that it had been an accident while she was working with some experimental alchemy. I remembered her telling me that the mixture needed more work to be complete, but she couldn't exactly test it on herself more.

I remembered thinking that she looked beautiful and comfortable with herself. I remembered wanting to feel that way too. So I offered to be a test subject to help her perfect the potion.

I told stories of what I remembered of the years that followed. I remembered the time in Nova's classes, doing my best to keep up. I remembered the time I misfired a blizzard spell and froze Nova's dessert in a block of ice before she'd taken a single bite. I remembered continuing to test the potion. My body changing and finally feeling comfortable in it.

I remembered Dalamud starting to fall. How Professor Dubois told me she was going to join up with the Eorzean Alliance to fight againt the empire to stop it. She asked me to come with her. I remembered wanting to help. But that would mean fighting. Lots of it. I remembered being terrified. I remembered her telling me to take time to think before answering her. I remembered leaving Ul'Dah the next day without saying anything.

Some of the crewmates wanted to see my magic. I hadn't been practicing at all, but a simple thunder spell would be easy enough. But when I tried to cast it nothing happened. I didn't understand. I remembered Nova's lessons. I could do the movements off of muscle memory. But it's like something else was missing. I couldn't get my aether to react like it should. The crew told me not to worry, and to keep at it to show them another day.

Most days were peaceful. But there was still occasional danger. Every so often rather than fish someone would pull up a monster from the sea. Redna was quick to handle any I caught, and the rest of the crew always kept weapons close.

Time passed, and we told more stories. Naapyonye, the shetona from the New World, told us a story about the time he saw the Dawnservant himself fighting a terrible beast. He called it a Vidraal, some of the strongest beasts you could find in Tural.

Redna told us more about her time with the Black Lily. Of fights, sacking pleasure cruises full of rich folks coming from Kugane, of engaging with Garlean ships, doing whatever they could to sink them.

I'd told all the stories I remembered of my time learning magic, so I looked further back.

I remembered my time living with my family in the Black Shroud. My mother and three older brothers. I remembered coming out to them. My mother helping me pick a new name. I remembered her being excited to finally have a daughter that could take over as matriach. I remembered that she never asked if that was what I wanted to do.

I remembered her teaching me to fight, using two swords. A style that my great grandfather had brought with him from the New World, and taught to his children and their children.

I remembered watching my brothers leave, one by one, to see the world. I remembered wishing I could've gone with them.

I remembered the first time my mother took me on a hunt. I'd barely seen sixteen summers, but she was sure I was ready. I remembered us finding a wild boar. It was big, but she insisted. I remembered drawing my swords and running at it.

I remembered it being over in an instant. The boar's cry, the smell of blood.

I remembered looking down at the boar's bloody corpse. Thinking that it was just a wild animal trying to live its life. I remembered my mother praising me, saying that with power like that I could destroy anything in my way.

I remembered running away from home the next day.

Naapyonye spoke up again after I told my story. He mentioned that the Dawnservant fought with the Viper style, which sounded just like what I remembered my mother teaching me. He told me it was created to fight dangerous threats like a Vidraal, and using it for hunting normal wild animals was overkill.

I hadn't remembered my mother ever telling me anything like that.

One day, almost a year and a half after the calamity, we saw another ship coming towards us. The captain could tell at a glance that they were pirates. While the rest of the crew prepared for a fight, Redna had me hide below deck. We were clearly a fishing vessel, so they weren't likely to fire on us, but they'd certainly try to board and take whatever we had.

Crouched behind some crates, I could head muffled conversation from above as they tried to negotiate. Sounds of fighting broke out quickly. I wanted to help, but remembering my fear of fighting kept me in place.

I heard someone coming down below deck, and peeked out to see. A hyur I didn't recognize. One of the pirates must've snuck under during the chaos. He hadn't noticed me, I could probably stay hidden until Redna or someone else came down.

I saw blood on his dagger.

All those memories of being afraid of fighting had never felt less like my own.

I stood up.

Once the pirates had all been routed, Redna came down to check on me. She found the hyur man out cold on the ground, laying next to his teeth. And me standing over him. Cut and bruised, muscles sore, knuckles bloody. But still alive.

The crewmate he'd attacked turned out to be Obrelle. She was keeping pirates away from the stairs down and he'd snuck up and stabbed her in the back. It looked like nothing vital was hit, and she'd be up again after a couple weeks of rest.

I was still sore for most of that time. A cut I'd taken across the bridge of my nose seemed like it was going to become a scar, and everyone told me to be proud of it. A trophy of battle.

Once we made it into port we turned the pirate over to the local authorities before getting to usual business.

Before we left Captain Kairisch asked me to come into her quarters. She had a gift for me. A pair of quality knives. Light, and easy to use. She offered to teach me how to use them, a fighting style she learned when she lived in Doma. I accepted.

A few moons later, the next time I hooked a monster, I was able to take it down myself, to cheers from the entire crew.

Time kept passing, and more stories were told. Avaldr and Borgar the Ala Mhigans told us about fighting in the rebellion against the Mad King. And then fighting the empire after.

Redna told us more about Kairi Kuroyuri. How they met in Doma. How Redna fell for her. How the two of them were married out on the open sea.

I was almost out of stories that I remembered. There was one left. I told them what I remembered about the most beautiful woman I'd ever seen.

I remembered it was after I left Ul'Dah, and Nova. I'd come to Limsa Lominsa to look for a ship leaving Eorzea. As I wandered the city I heard someone singing. I remembered following the melody to its source. And then I saw her. I remembered she was an Au Ra with black scales. She had shining purple eyes, green skin that looked so soft, and an absolutely beautiful smile.

I remembered overhearing her talk with a hrothgar woman. They were adventurers, and they talked of their time seeing the world on their way to Eorzea.

I remembered thinking how exciting that sounded. How traveling as an adventurer sounded fun. How nice it would be to spend time with her, get to know her.

I remembered hearing them mention Carteneau. That they would fight against the empire to protect Eorzea.

I remembered deciding not to try talking to her. Wandering Limsa more before running into Captain Kairisch.

I tried casting magic again a few times over the years, but could never get it to work. Eventually I decided not to worry about it. I could handle myself fine with the knives and Renda's lessons.

We only had two other run-ins with pirates. The captain of the first crew recognized the feared Redna Akairi, and left peacefully. The second crew weren't so lucky, and we fought. I tried my best to keep the fear I remembered down in my heart, and fought them off bravely with the rest of the crew.

The crew told more stories. Most everyone had dealt with the empire in some way. Fighting in rebellions or just living under imperial rule.

Redna told us about her last night with Kairi. Garlemald was coming to Doma, and her wife couldn't stand by and not help. Redna offered to join, but Kairi refused her. Said that Redna's life was meant to be out at sea. She never saw Kairi again.

I didn't have any stories left. I'd told everything I remembered of my life. The captain told me I could tell the same stories again. Or I could even just make something up. A story's a story whether it's real or not.

I decided to tell them the story from my dreams.

I dreamt of another world. Of being a different person entirely. A hyur with red hair. A hero who fought with their comrades against the darkness.

Horrible monsters threatened the land, created by villains from the shadows. But the hero and their comrades fought them endlessly. They could take the fallen monster's strength and turn it back against the fiends.

I didn't know the ending. Had never dreamt of one. But the crew loved the stories regardless.

Four years had passed since the calamity. My time on the Liljefisker may not have been what I remembered expecting, but it was a great time nonetheless.

One day we found ourselves in a vicious storm. It took everything to keep us afloat, we were thrown far off course. Even after the skies calmed we were stuck in a thick fog.

As Redna tried to get our bearings, someone called out that they had seen what looked like a lighthouse's beacon in the distance. A couple other crew members saw it too, but the rest of us didn't. Redna said it was all we had to work with, so we sailed in its direction.

After an hour or so, there was a crashing sound and the ship stopped. We'd run aground on an island that seemed to come out of nowhere.

Everyone was okay, and Redna had some of the crew check for damage. We couldn't see much of the island from here, so Avaldr and Borgar volunteered to disembark and scout the area. See if this island was inhabited.

Hours passed. The hull had some damage, and would take a while to repair. The scouts never came back.

Redna decided she would go out and look for them. I wanted to come with her. She didn't want me in danger but I insisted. Obrelle offered to come as well, and Redna asked her to stay close to me.

The thick fog gave the island an oppressive atmosphere. There were no notable landmarks, but we kept walking.

"Wait." Redna put a hand up to stop us and kneeled down. There was a sword on the ground. It was Avaldr's.

Obrelle called out his names, and the captain hushed her. "Somethin's here. Stay close to me, we have no idea-"

There was a shout from behind us. "Captain!!" It was Naapyonye. He was running to us from the direction of the ship. He stopped, panting. He was holding his side. There was blood.

Redna rushed over and put a hand on his shoulder. "Easy now. What happened?"

"Th- the ship. We're under attack. These.... Things jumped out of the water..."

Redna gritted her teeth. "Damnit. I'll go and help. You two stay here with him. Tend to his wounds." She turned to face Obrelle and I. "Stay- BEHIND YOU!"

I heard a thunk, and a crash as I turned around. There was a huge monster. At the ends of it arms were two massive sets of claws, burning with dark energy. One had just batted Obrelle aside, into a rock wall fifteen yalms away. And the other was actively coming down on me.

I didn't have any time to react. It tore into my chest, the pain was unbearable. I heard the Naapyonye scream, heard Redna drawing her gunblade. And then nothing. I blacked out.

The pain didn't stop. It only got worse. A burning feeling that went deeper than the wound itself. It was a familiar feeling.

I realized what the monster was. A voidsent. Creatures of darkness. And its claws were coated with dark aether. The same dark aether that was now flooding into me. Bleeding into my very soul. Threatening to overtake it completely. It was a familiar feeling.

Why was it so familiar?

It all came back to me. My life.

Not the life I remembered. The life I dreamed.

I was Xen. The thirteenth of my line. A line of knights who fought the darkness.

Monsters not unlike voidsent plagued our world. The legends said that villains clad in black created these monsters and set them upon the people. They were powerful. Unstoppable. Even when they were killed the aether left behind would form into a new monster.

The legends said that one day a group of knights, my ancestor among them, were apporached by an emmisary from the gods, clad in white. He taught them how to use the monster's power against them. To take the aether of a dead fiend and reforge it. To solidify it into weapons so they could fight back.

So they fought back. They taught their children how to forge from the dark aether, and those children taught theirs.

I fought with my fellow knights, my family, against these monsters. We took their aether to make our swords, our shields. And we used it to build our cities. Homes to live in. Walls to protect us.

And one day we were confronted by a villain from the legends. Clad in black, with a red mask hiding their face. They told us the end was near. But we defied that end and fought them. They summoned monsters before our eyes and we cut through them. One sword would snap against the fiend that would become the next.

My comrades fell, but we kept fighting. When the last monster fell I confronted the villain alone. I said I'd stop them, and they made one last fiend, more powerful than the rest. I cut it down, and took its aether to forge one final sword to end this villain.

But it was too much. I couldn't control that aether like normal, could feel it building into more and more. Like a dam about to burst.

The villain laughed. They thanked me and vanished. The darkness exploded out. It was so much. I felt it overtake my body and soul. It felt like enough to overtake the entire world.

That was the end of my story.

.....

"But it wasn't the end."

?

I opened my eyes. I was in an empty white space. And I was myself again.

"No, after all that you got to run around in my body for four years."

A voice from behind me. I turned around and saw myself sitting there. The me I wasn't.

The sad cat.

A bitter laugh. "Yeah, that's me. Meow. I really hate when you call me that, y'know?"

What? She heard that?

She nodded. "I've heard all your thoughts this whole time. It was more like you were speakin' out loud." She stood up, turned to me and crossed her arms. "But you haven't heard a word I've said 'til now."

The whole time? You mean...?

"Yeah, Xen. For four years I've been here, watchin' you live my life from behind my own eyes."

I had no idea. I-

"I know. Ever since you woke up after the calamity I haven't been me. I yelled and screamed from here but you never noticed. I watched you take on my memories and think you were me. I watched you spend time with everyone. Watched you see more of the world than I ever had."

Rahks, I'm-

"Don't call me that either. I wanted to find a new name for myself. But you changed it without me. You changed me. Ignored my fear and learned to fight. You told stories from my past, things that I just wanted to push away and forget. I wanted to run away from it all but once you showed up I couldn't run anymore. I couldn't do anythin'."

I'm sorr-

"Shut up! I don't want to hear you apologize. I was so angry at you all this time. I've been terrified of the idea of spendin' the rest of my life like this, trapped in my own body, not able to be myself. I thought a lot about what I'd say to you if you ever started hearin' me. But now you're here. And all I can really say is. Thanks."

What?

She turned away and sat back down. "The life you had me live was better than what I would have lived by myself. Even thinkin' you were me, havin' all my memories, fears, and anxieties, you did things I didn't think I could do. Sometimes I'd quiet my mind. Try to blend myself into your thoughts, see if I could just be the me that you were..." She pulled her knees up to her chest and laid her head between them. "More than anythin' I'm upset that I couldn't live any of that life."

I sat down next to her.

You still could. It's not too late to try.

We opened our eyes.

Everyhting hurt. We were still on the island, laying on the ground. Our chest had been wrapped up. It was bloody, but we recognized Redna's coat.

The fog was thick, but we could see one figure, crouched on the ground, drawing something out. It was Redna. She looked injured. We couldn't see anyone else.

"C-Captain..." I hadn't said anything. She could talk. I stayed quiet.

Redna perked up and turned around. "Oh thank the kami." She rushed over and put a hand on our shoulder. "Xen, you're still with me, good. Don't worry, everythin's going to be okay." There were tears in her eyes.

There were tears in our eyes too. "I'm glad... I could be me again... Before the end..."

"What? Xen what are you...? Look, don't give up. You're not goin' to die on my watch. I'm going to get you out of here. I promise. No matter what it takes."

I could feel us smiling. We reached a shaky hand out to Redna's on our shoulder. But then the burning came back. The darkness.

Everything went black again.

And we were back in that white space.

"Yeah. It was worth trying. Thank you, Xen." She stretched her arms out and laid down, her eyes closed, with a forced smile on her face. "Now I can die without regrets."

Without regrets? What are you talking about, you've got plenty of those. Don't you want to see the world? Don't you want to see what happened to everyone in Eorzea? Your family, Nova, those adventurers? You heard the captain, you can't give up. That can't be enough.

She gritted her teeth. "Of course it's not! Of course I want to see them. I want to be able to live my life like you did. But there's nothing I can do. Even if Redna gets us out of there the darkness isn't stoppin'. I can feel it burning in my soul too. Dyin' with one less regret will have to be good enough."

It doesn't. It won't. I'm not going to let you die either.

I stood up.

"What are you goin' to do?"

Darkness. I spent my whole life fighting it. Forging it into something else. I'll pull it out of our souls, and forge it into something else.

"Will that work? I saw your memories when they came back to you, but I never saw you forgin' darkness that was inside someone like this."

I don't know. But I have to try.

I took a few steps forward and closed my eyes. Reached my arms out to feel for the darkness around us. Inside us. It was only just starting to bleed into her. But it was deep inside me. It had nearly overtaken my entire being. I knew I had to work fast.

"How do you do it?"

I opened my eyes and looked behind me. She'd stood up.

"Your whole life you had to fight. You didn't have any choice. But you kept goin'. Even when you were the only one left. Even now, when you might tear apart your own soul."

I turned back to her and smiled.

You're right. I fought because I didn't have a choice. Not because I wasn't given one. But because there's no other choice I would make. I fought to protect my world. My family.

"But that's all gone now."

It is. But I can fight for its memory. And find new things to fight for. For the Liljefisker. Redna and the crew. And for you.

I fight to protect the things I care about.

She opened her mouth to speak, but I could tell she couldn't find the right words. In the end she just smiled to me and nodded. She understood.

There's not much more time, but I want to ask. Did you ever decide on a name for yourself?

She looked sheepish. "No... To be honest I do like your name."

I reached my hand out to her.

Then keep it. If this really is the end of Xen the Thirteenth's story, then it can also be the start of Xen the Fourteenth's.

She wiped tears from her eyes and took my hand. "Thank you, Xen, I-"

A binding light. The moment our hands touched something happened. I felt a surge of strength. That darkness that was moments away from overtaking me suddenly felt like nothing. I could forge it with no effort. So I did.

"Xen? What's goin' on??"

I felt something pulling at me. It was familiar. Not to any of my memories, or even to any of hers. But to something somewhere deep in my heart.

It felt like home. Like open skies. Like the sun's warmth.

...

Xen's head was pounding. Her chest was sore. The whole world felt like it was moving around her. Rocking back and forth. It actually was.

She was on a ship. It wasn't the Liljefisker. She was lying in a bed, one of several in the room.

She sat up and looked around. Empty beds to one side, and to the other one bed with one occupant, who had just jumped out of bed to hug her.

"You're up! Thank the kami. How are you feelin'?" Redna was holding her tight. A little too tight.

"Ow."

"Sorry." Redna let go and took a step back. She looked tired, there were bandages around her head, covering her left eye.

"We're- Uh. I'm okay. I think so, at least. What happened?"

Redna frowned. She sat back down on the bed and was quiet for a moment.

"Voidsent. They were all over the island. Tore the 'fisker apart. Chased us deeper inland. We were the only ones who made it out."

Xen wanted to cry. She'd watched herself get to know the crew the last four years. Had wanted to know them again herself. But they were gone.

Redna reached out and put a hand on Xen's shoulder. "I managed to find a lifeboat and got us off that damned rock. We drifted for a few days before this merchant ship found us. Their chirurgeon patched us up. That was about a week ago."

Xen started to stand up, and quickly found herself falling back into bed. The hrothgar woman caught her and helped lay her down gently.

"Easy now. They patched you up, but you were in bad shape. We're a few days out from port, they'll get you to a proper doctor there. I'll go get the chirurgeon, just hold tight for now."

Redna stood up and started towards the door, before stopping.

"Xen. Do you still... Feel like you?"

Xen smiled. "Yeah. More than ever."

"Good." Redna turned around, a smile on her face too, and then she left.

Eventually the ship made it to port. Xen would need a couple moons of rest before she could be up and about, and a few more after to get in shape. For the time being Redna worked with the local fishermans guild.

Once she could walk again, Xen asked Redna to teach her to fight. Her body certainly remembered how to use her knives, but she needed to be sure she could handle things herself.

A few moons passed, and Redna was ready to leave. She needed to start saving up for a new ship, and had plans to fight as a gladiator in the Bloodsands at Ul'Dah. Xen saw her off on the next ship. She wanted to take more time here, and someone had to take Redna's spot at the fisherman's guild.

Xen trained with her knives. And though she was rusty, she practiced her thaumaturgy. It wouldn't hurt to have a backup option. Being an adventurer sounded like it'd be a lot of work.

Some nights, while lying in bed, trying to sleep. She'd quiet her mind. Silence her thoughts as much as she could. Just to see if anyone else was there, trying to talk to her. But she was alone. Only she was herself.

Eventually it was time. Medical debts had been paid, she'd done plenty of work with the guild, and there was a ship that came from Sharlyan in port. It was bound for Limsa Lominsa. She gathered her things, bought a ticket, and went aboard.

She thought about Eorzea. It had been almost five years since the calamity. She'd heard about the destruction it caused, and how the land was recovering.

She thought of her family. Of the professor. Of that beautiful adventurer. She didn't know if any of them were even still alive, but she hoped she could see them again.

She saw some of the other passengers. A bearded hyuran man who waved to her as she boarded. A pair of elezen children who didn't seem to notice she existed.

She sat down below deck and closed her eyes. It was going to be a long trip, so she may as well rest now.

She slept, and dreamed.

Dreamed of light. Of a shadowy figure. And of three words.

"Hear... Feel... Think..."

[xoxochb]

OKAY I’m finally done updating my theme 😭😭

[strawbebbiesart]

Haunted // Love Affair With A House 🏡💌

[writingsinashes]

@arandomnerdsrp358 asked:

❝ on a scale of 1-10, how scared were you that i was gonna die? ❞ Ellie whispered, afraid of the answer the man would give her. “Joel…I know I’m not like her, like your daughter, but thank you for saving me anyway.”

He knew just how lucky he was for Ellie's reaction to have been this... calm, not the anger he thought he would be burned with when she found out the news of what he had done with the Fireflies that night.

Instead, Joel was faced with a version of the girl that he hadn't wanted but would never walk away from, and this version actually hurt him just as much as the predicted hate he expected. How could she not know that he knew that she wasn't Sarah? Was he really that cold of a bastard that he had Ellie, doubting the fact that he would save her?

Turning to look at the girl, Joel stayed silent for a few moments before slightly shaking his head in disbelief, a frown on his face. "I don't think I can put that on a scale, babygirl." Spoken slowly, his eyes narrowed in thought at how to explain it.

"But... but you do know by now that I'm not going to let that happen to you, right? No matter how scared I am, I will always make sure you're alright before anything." At her mumbled sentence, he found himself looking at her sharply, his head already shaking from side to side.

"No- Listen, I know that... I know that... Sarah- It's a complicated topic for me to try to think about, even the good times. Especially the good times..." Joel murmured as he trailed off for a moment, only to look back at Ellie, and in a rare show of affection, he reached out for her shoulder and leaned in just enough to have his arm around her shoulder loosely, their sides resting against each other.

"I don't want to hear you say that again. You're not like her, that's true, but that doesn't make you any less like her in my eyes. You- ah hell, kid. You know how I am when it comes to talkin' 'bout fuckin' feelings. Just because you're not my child in that way doesn't mean I don't think of myself as your dad, as weird as all this is, and I need you to know that you... there was never a competition, Ellie. Like it or not, you're my kid. You're stuck with me."

[chemdisaster]

IT'S DONE

5 Times Scar Couldn't Speak + 1 Time He Didn't Have To

based on this

@stiffyck @jos-has-too-many-hobbies - people who asked to be tagged

[jdorian]

Wip Word Search 🔍

rules: use this generator to generate three random words (or however many you'd like to do) and share the lines where they show up in your WIPs

my words: affect, great, opposed

1. affect from the mudslide fic ☔️

He watched as Eddie got up from the couch, carefully depositing Christopher’s legs from his lap before turning back to him and planting a soft kiss onto the top of his soft curls. He was getting too old for these kinds of affections when awake and — as much as he couldn’t wait to see Christopher become his own, independent person — Buck desperately wanted to halt time. It wasn’t a fair thing to think; Chris wasn’t exactly his kid to begin with and regardless of what Eddie’s will said would happen after his death, Buck's place in their lives wasn’t set in stone, so he savored every tiny moment he could. Somewhere along the last handful of years, Eddie and Christopher became Family, with a capital F. Buck loved Chris like he was his own and his feelings for Eddie were clear as day — only if not for the man himself. It was better that way, Buck reasoned. He probably wouldn’t let Buck hang around all the time, if he’d have known. Eddie probably didn’t think of them that way anyway. Buck ran his fingers through the curly hair tickling his cheek and pulled the kid’s small frame just a fraction closer, relishing in the moment of stillness.

2. great from the jealous eddie fic 🧇

“So uh t-tell me about yourself, you know, hobbies, pets, family, whatever.” “That’s pretty broad.” Jason chuckled and Buck felt his cheeks heat up immediately. Wow, he really hasn’t been on a proper date in such a long time that apparently he lost the ability to make conversation. Great. “Sorry I—” “Relax, Buck. It’s alright.” His shoulders sagged a little at that. “I guess cycling is a hobby, right? I’m not allowed pets at my place and uh… Two sisters, parents live in Nevada.” “Uh great, that- that’s great! I have a sister too, my parents live in Pennsylvania though.” Jason assessed his face for a long moment before he leaned back in his chair with a small sigh. “Don’t take this the wrong way, but you seem much more nervous than before. Is everything alright?” “Uh yeah— yeah, I’m fine, just…” Buck sighed and rubbed the bridge of his nose with his thumb and forefinger. “Eddie, my uh my partner at the 118, he’s been acting kinda weird about us going out. I just… I don’t know, I guess I got a little into my head about it.” A disapproving frown tugged at the patch of skin between Jason’s eyebrows for a moment, before it disappeared with a sigh. “So he’s one of those guys then.” Buck knew what he meant instantly; the type of guys who were just too macho not to feel threatened by even the mere mention of two men dating. Of course, it couldn’t have been further from the truth —  and Buck was quick to make that clear. “N-no, not at all! He’s a good guy, great actually. He’s my best friend.”

3. opposed from the breeding kink fic 🛏️

“You might be right,” he breathed, leaning over Buck and slipping his hands under his thighs for more leverage, “maybe we should just stay here like this forever.” Eddie’s eyes fluttered shut for a moment when he bottomed out again. It wasn’t a plausible or in any way realistic idea, really, but Eddie found that he still wasn’t opposed to the fantasy of it. Especially not when Buck’s warmth enveloped him so perfectly, while he got to watch his chest rise and fall quicker and quicker, listen to his quiet whines and grunts as Eddie sped up his movements until he hit a steady rhythm and smell as fresh sweat broke through the lingering scent of their shared body wash; tea tree and mint. His hair was still damp from their shower and that was one thing they didn’t share; the shampoo — and god, Eddie was grateful that it never became something that he’d lose on the account of getting used to smelling it on himself, so now he could let the fruity and fresh scent of green apple, and something that uniquely belonged to Buck wash over his senses.

tags under the cut 💛

I was tagged by @hippolotamus @theotherbuckley @daffi-990 @jamespearce9-1-1 @fortheloveofbuddie and @wikiangela thank youuu 💛

✨no pressure tagging: @malewifediaz @spagheddiediaz @jeeyuns @eddiebabygirldiaz @nmcggg @thewolvesof1998 @ladydorian05

[selfinflictedgunshotwound]

i'm kind of amazed how most of the stardew marriage candidates just want you to be their manic pixie dream whatever by agreeing with everything they like and plying them with compliments or praise or whatever (which is fine but a bit. Much) but for shane his romance is just you being there for him while he figures his own shit out... dunno why i never wanted to romance him before he's so good

[your-fave-is-bi]

Painted n dry sets + just painted set, second coat drying

I only made the red raw meat set, the rest were made by my sister n just never got to the being inked stage lol

[beloxiia]

doggystyle, sideways, frontwards, backwards, upside down, 360 degrees, no condoms, skin on skin, on the living room,on the bed room, on the fridge, on the closet, on the ceiling, on the walls on the bathroom on the couch on the car and on the street.

[raitrolling]

Also was randomly thinking about parental situations for human AU earlier

Katrin lives with her parents and her younger sister (Aislin), and is on good terms with them, but in true Katrin fashion is pretty emotionally distant due to her depression. Her parents have tried to reach out and reconnect but have been at a loss for how to help their daughter for a long time

Nancor lives with his dad, and his mum tragically died when he was young. He witnessed whatever accident that was, which caused his obsession with death and eventually studying to become a mortician and also getting really into taxidermy and the occult. He’s very close with his dad, who thinks his hobbies are a little morbid but is supportive regardless

Eichio lives with his older brother Adrile, who is about 10-12 years older than him. Their parents are divorced, but their mum has been out of the picture for a long time and their dad was an abusive asshole. Adrile didn’t move out until Eichio turned 18 because he didn’t want to leave his younger brother alone with their dad, and then he convinced Eichio to move out with him

Ashe lives on his own, but visits his parents regularly. They’re also on good terms, his mum is a sweet little worrywart who dotes on her son all the time, and while his dad is less doting he’s equally as supportive and proud of his son for pursuing a career in medicine

Velour’s parents have been out of the picture since he was a toddler, and he’s been raised by his grandparents ever since. They have lucrative careers that require them to be constantly traveling the world, and simply did not have time to raise their son. He loves his grandparents and still visits them even though he’s long moved out, but feels nothing towards his actual parents other than the usual melancholy that hits around his birthday and they’ve forgotten to text him or send a postcard again

Lusien lives with his dad at the lighthouse in the fishing village they reside in. His parents had split up amicably when he was younger, and he still sees his mum from time to time. He’s on good terms with both parents, but is definitely much closer to his dad

Viltau has always had an awful relationship with his father, as he was the most typical ex-military asshole dad you can imagine, and was a lot closer to his mother growing up. The first thing he did after graduating college was move out and start his catering business. Then the first thing he did have making it big in the industry was buy an apartment for his mother to help her leave her husband for good