#it was the top one that i thought of first! like a typical jewish star it's made of one upside down triangle and one rightside up one

[smile-files]

two quick edits: sierpinski's star of david!

i love doodling sierpinski's triangle, and it just occurred to me that the jewish star, being made of triangles itself, could be created using sierpinski's triangle :)

[violetwolfraven]

Peace and Joy

@spot-king-of-brooklyn I’m your secret Santa! @newsies-secretsanta

You said your favorite ships are sprace and/or javid and you’re good with pretty much anything so I’m gonna write two separate vaguely holiday-related oneshots in the reincarnation AU. Don’t worry though nothing heavy, just fluff. No COVID because I’ve had enough of that dude and I say so. Enjoy! Happy Holidays!

Tw: referenced past period-typical homophobia.

...

Spot couldn’t remember being this happy... ever. Not in the early 1900s or in the early 2000s.

Well, the closest he could think of was 1902, when he and Race moved on from being newsies and from being leaders of their respective boroughs and rented that old apartment in Brooklyn together. But that had been muted by the need to be careful. They couldn’t be normal young people in love because they always had to hide.

And that was fine at the time because it was expected. It was them doing whatever it took to be together not knowing they’d ever get the chance to do it another way.

Now, in the bright, beautiful, forward-thinking 21st century, they could be safe. They could be in love without fear of the consequences. They could go out Christmas shopping together, and Spot didn’t know if that counted as a date, but it kind of felt like one as he watched his boyfriend bop a little to Mariah Carey’s All I Want For Christmas Is You as he looked around.

He ended up having to look away before he started blushing too hard. Even if he wasn’t the King of Brooklyn this time, he still had a bit of a reputation as a stone cold badass. For all he knew, one or more of their more mischievous friends could be spying on them right now. And besides, this thrift store probably had stuff he could get the few Brooklyn kids who’d come back, too.

He was still deciding if Hotshot would think it was funny if he got him a tank top that said ‘hot stuff’ on it. The others would find it funny, but Spot honestly wasn’t sure if it would make his former second uncomfortable.

“Hey, Spottie, ya think my little brother would like this?”

Spot turned back to see Race holding up a bright purple worm on a string, but a giant version of one. One that was big enough to be a scarf.

“Knowin’ your family,” he admitted, “I think any of ‘em would be happy to get one of those.”

It was true. Honestly, the most sensible Larkin brother was the second-oldest, Crutchie, but Spot could still see him proudly wearing a worm-on-a-string-scarf to school after winter break ended.

Besides him, Medda, Race’s mom, tended to embrace whatever unique fashion choice she could find. And Jack, of course, didn’t let being the oldest of four stop him from being a theatrical little shit who liked drawing attention to himself.

And Romeo was somehow even more eccentric than Race, so he would definitely like that thing.

Race grinned, “I’m gonna get Ro a worm scarf for Christmas.”

“Your family is ridiculous.”

“Thank you. So, what’re ya gettin’ for Denton?”

Oh, shit. Spot had completely forgotten about getting anything for Denton.

He really should get something for him. After all, the teacher hadn’t even known Spot when Jack asked if he could stay with him. All he’d needed to know was that Spot needed a place to hide from his terrible parents and couldn’t stay with the Larkins, mostly because Medda had a strict rule about her boys’ partners sleeping over unless it was absolutely necessary. (it was also because Spot couldn’t think of anyone he’d want to live with less than Jack Kelly, but Denton didn’t really need to know that, did he?)

So far, Spot’s parents hadn’t shown any signs of missing him, and Spot couldn’t decide if that hurt or not, but it barely mattered anymore.

Because Denton didn’t really have any rules beyond ‘do your homework’, ‘take a shower occassionally’, and ‘if you leave the house, let me know where you’re going.’ He helped Spot pick out a Halloween costume, let him spend Thanksgiving with Race, and gave him money for Christmas shopping. He was fine with Spot being gay and having a boyfriend, even if there was an added rule with that of ‘you can’t have the door closed if you’re alone in your room with Race.’

He gave Spot space, but also made it clear that he could come to him for anything he needed help with. He never hit him, never pushed when Spot wanted to be alone, never even raised his voice unless they were in an already-loud room and he needed to get his attention.

In short, in only a few months, he’d become the best adult Spot had ever had in his life. He wasn’t his father, but he was closest thing Spot had ever gotten to a dad.

The Denton they’d known in their last life had been kind of like that, too. He’d helped as best he could whenever one of the newsies got into trouble, always being there for anyone who needed him since Kath first introduced her new reporter friend to her newsie friends. Of course, Spot hadn’t been living with Denton then, so he’d never really thought about it.

“What do you even get a middle-aged man for Christmas?”

Race shrugged, “Power tools?”

The idea of getting Denton power tools was so ridiculous that they both laughed.

“Uh... he’s a writer,” Race pointed out, “So... fancy pens?”

“Fancy pens? We’re at a thrift store, Racer.”

“Well we don’t gotta stay here forever. There’s a Barnes and Noble across the street.”

He wasn’t wrong about that, but Spot wasn’t sure about the whole ‘fancy pen’ thing. It seemed a little generic.

“Yooooo! Spot, check this out for Jack!”

He was holding up a bright blue sketchbook that said ‘Sketchy Bitch’ on the cover.

“Oh yeah, ya definitely have to get that for Cowboy.”

Spotting (no pun intended) something else on the shelf behind him, Spot grinned.

He had the perfect thing to get for the man who’d taken him in.

...

“This is gonna be so fuckin’ awesome.”

Davey snorted, “You’re way too excited ‘bout this, Jackie.”

He loved his boyfriend, but he had a tendency to get overenthusiastic about things.

Well, he loved that about Jack, too. And he loved being able to call him his boyfriend, now. That they didn’t need to hide this time.

He and Sarah had both been a little worried about their parents’ reaction, but it had turned out to be for nothing. They’d each gotten a t-shirt with their respective pride flag for the first night of Hanukkah, and Jack and Kath were always welcome to come over as long as at least one parent was home.

Davey loved Jack just as much in this lifetime as he had in his first, but it was different, not having to hide it. It was good different, but definitely different. Being able to be who they were and be in love and knowing that it was generally frowned upon to be homophobic now, at least where they lived.

And being able to do random shit that was romantic and fun as hell, but not something would even occur to most people to do.

After a sleepy conversation once Crutchie, Race, and Romeo had fallen asleep watching White Christmas (which Davey appreciated for the choreography in the dance numbers) one time about how there weren’t really any Hanukkah movies, Jack had collaborated with Kath to write a lesbian Hanukkah musical romcom to post to YouTube.

Objectively, it wasn’t that great. It was good for a movie made by a bunch of high school juniors, but they couldn’t afford good cameras or microphones or anything. Plus, it was appealing to a very niche audience, so Davey doubted this movie would get more than twenty views.

Still, it meant a lot that Jack was so excited about it, that he was working so hard on props and editing in the lighting and music for it so Kath and Saz could play Jewish lesbians fake-dating at a holiday party who fall in love. It was cute.

“It ain’t gonna win any awards,” Jack admitted, “But I think we’s got somethin’ good here!”

“We do,” Davey agreed.

Was he actually talking about the romcom starring his sister and her girlfriend? Partially. It was a pretty good movie for something produced by teenagers.

But they had something good there that wasn’t on the screen of Jack’s laptop, too.

Jack seemed to share those thoughts, with the way he was smiling.

“What’s with the look, mi amor?”

Davey rolled his eyes as the other boy put his arm around his waist.

“Like you don’t know, love,” he chuckled, “Remember the last time we did somethin’ like this? And by ‘we’ I mean ‘you.’”

“Shh,” Jack shook his head, “Nope. We don’t talk about the latkes incident.”

“You mean when you almost burned down our tiny little kitchen trying to—“

“We don’t talk about it!”

Davey laughed. It was funny, how Jack couldn’t, in any lifetime, cook anything more complicated than like... chili or stew. While he could make something edible, he couldn’t make anything that was really considered good.

“Davey, love, luz de mi vida, it was literally over a hundred years ago, so stop. Bringin’. Up. The. Latkes. Incident!”

He punctuated the sentence by hitting Davey with one of his mom’s throw pillows.

“Okay, Jackie, I get it! Stop hitting me!”

“Fine,” Jack grinned, “I ain’t almost burned down a kitchen in over a century, babe. I thinks that’s a good record to have.”

“Most people never almost burn down a kitchen,” Davey pointed out, “I know I—wait, did you just call me ‘babe’?”

Jack was definitely not meeting his eyes to try to hide how he was blushing, “Uh... is that okay?”

Davey smirked. Jack didn’t get flustered that often, but it was adorable when he did.

And even if he had almost burned down their apartment, it had been cute back then, how he’d tried so hard to try to do something nice for Davey for the holiday season. It was cute now, too.

That was one thing that hadn’t changed through the decades, he guessed.

“It’s definitely okay, babe.”

...

“Spot, is this a... ‘Best Dad In The World’ mug?”

“...if you cry, I’m outta here.”

[stupid-damn-harp]

Notes for “Rural Boys Watch the Apocalypse”

“Your hand’s in mine”

This poem doesn’t explicitly state the relationship between the two boys, and this adds to it. The two characters could be in a romantic relationship, and this choice comes with a variety of implications given the traditional christian liturgy that’s repeated throughout the poem. If this is the end of the world, where will these two gay boys end up? Are they thinking about their afterlife? Are they wondering if they can stay together? Whether they’ll be with their family? There’s so many questions that these boys might be thinking of if they’re in this sort of relationship. They could also just be very close neighbors. Later in the poem he specifies his ��doomsday neighbors,” which might be a sign that the other boy and his family might be the other neighbors, or it might have just been explaining the neighbor’s behavior. Another option could be that they’re best friends that are so comfortable with each other that holding hands feels comforting, but not completely natural because the narrator thought it was important to point it out. 

“waters turnin' to blood”

The two boys obviously share the same or similar religious views, and are probably at least somewhat learned or devout in their faith. I grew up reading the scriptures and I can’t say off the top of my head what a biblical apocalypse looks like - but this boy can, and relates it to the other boy, expecting him to also understand.

“But there are only the fallin’ stars”

I’m struck that the “only” thing is the falling stars. It’s almost as if he’s saying that the rest of the world has already ended, already vanished from his view and his mind. All he can see is the stars falling, and it doesn’t matter anymore if the rest of the world or the people around him still exist. He’s somehow writing himself and the other boy off as unimportant in the face of this global catastrophe. This line also stands outside of any stanza, forcing us to pay attention to the entire phrase and inviting a degree of separation from the stanzas before and after. There are only the falling stars, and that’s important. More important than what this boy thought would happen, more important than telling where the initial warning came from. The present events hold more weight.

"'Least the weather channel warned us about it,"

I wonder why the weather channel is the one that predicted this apocalypse? He mentions falling stars, which might be under their jurisdiction, but I feel like higher-up governmental agencies would be in charge of announcing and predicting the literal end of the world. 

“are loadin' the back”

If the stars are falling, and this is the end of the world, where do these neighbors think they’re going? Where do they think that they’ll be safe?

“under large whitewashed crosses”

This line is especially striking given the religious imagery throughout the entire poem. Jesus was a middle eastern Jewish man, and that’s something that many Christians in America conveniently forget. Many people in this religion spread around views that those with darker skin are children of ham (as we see in the Poisonwood Bible) or suggest that the native american people are really the descendants of the Lamanites, so their darker skin was a curse from God. These crosses that the neighbors are taking with them embody all of these harmful beliefs. The religion itself is whitewashed. The crosses are described as large, and I’m having trouble modulating that size within my own thoughts. On one hand, they have to be small enough to fit within the back of a pickup truck. But, are these crosses large as in “human sized and could be used for their original purpose”? Large as in “larger than handheld so they seem giant, but they’re best suited for yard decorations”? Either way, I’m taking it as a symbol of how contemporary christians take up the most space in religious discussions in America and quite often interpret anything different from their blatantly obvious beliefs as an attack on their faith. Think Boomers yelling about the “war on christmas” type. These crosses are not only whitewashed but they’re large too, visibly screaming to anyone looking in their direction that the drivers of the truck belong to the Christian faith and that they’re going to be confrontational about it. Everything else is stacked under the crosses, giving them the most significance and the most visibility.

“I wanna see ‘em”

Honestly, this line slightly confused me. These women seem quite knowledgeable about the events foretold in the bible. But it’s also stated in the bible that human beings never see angels or God’s true form because we wouldn’t be able to handle it. Surely they must know that? Do they think that these rules will be lifted simply because the world is ending? Are they hoping to see these wonders even though it would have untold consequences on her own mortal form? Don’t get me wrong, I would also love to see an angel in their full and confusing glory, but I don’t have enough of a death wish to actually follow through with that.

“their calloused hands”

Interesting imagery here. Typically angels are described using delicate and ethereal words, or sometimes words that just remind us that angels are spirits and don’t have physical bodies. But the word “calloused.” Calluses imply hard work. Calluses mean rough hands, dirty feet, and tough love. Calluses mean a physical body that is growing stronger. There’s nothing delicate about calluses. There’s nothing inherently holy about calluses. The working class has calluses, and the so-called “perfect” bodies of models and influencersnever have calluses. But here these heavenly beings are, rough hands and all. Perhaps he’s envisioning someone he knows as an angel, and thus opted for the more human-feeling approach. Perhaps he’s hoping that the people of earth are fighting to stay here, fighting to continue living, and the mere act of carrying these writhing and fiery people causes so much work for the angels that they develop these human characteristics of calluses. Perhaps he’s hoping that he’ll become an angel over some darker fate. I’m not sure what implications were intended with this line, but it feels beautiful and wholly human to me, and I love it for that.

“stupid damn harp”

This is the first of two instances where the narrator uses the phrase “stupid dumb” to describe something of the archangel Gabriel’s. Both times he isn’t describing Gabriel himself, just things that he possesses in traditional stories. This could be a nervous boy making jokes in an unsure time as a coping mechanism, but it also could be the author showing his own disillusionment with the traditional christian stories and traditions. 

Additionally, the combination of “stupid” and “damn” here is pretty interesting. In Christian mythology, any deity in heaven (e.g. God, angels, Jesus, etc) possesses all the knowledge in the universe. This boy referring to the archangel’s belongings as “stupid” doesn’t reflect this. It almost feels like he wants to criticize the angel himself but he knows there might be consequences, so he settles for calling his iconic harp and tunic the words he wants to call the angel himself. He’s also using the word “damn,” which in biblical contexts typically has hellish connotations. If someone is damned, then they’ve been condemned to hell. The archangel Gabriel is the literal antithesis of that idea, so it’s interesting to see this word applied to anything involving him at all. 

“moanin’ like a sinner in hell”

This comparison continues the interesting dichotomy between heaven/hell that we find throughout the poem. The doomsday neighbors’ truck not only holds large whitewashed crosses, but also sounds like someone suffering in hell. Weirdly enough, it seems to give us a view at the sort of Christians that think they’re doing God’s work (holding the whitewashed crosses), but once they get started towards their destination, it becomes more and more obvious that they’re not being entirely truthful (sounding like a sinner in hell). 

I’m also struck by the mildness and neutrality in this sentence. Usually when someone’s talking about those in hell, the verb used is “screaming,” not “moaning.” Is this wishful thinking on the narrator’s part, or just a description of the truck’s engine using terminology he already knows? The narrator doesn’t seem to be passing judgement with this comparison either, it comes across as an observation rather than a condemnation of the neighbors’ actions. His family chose not to leave, their family is leaving right now, and those two actions aren’t compared or judged here.

*

This poem was chosen for the anthology because of the twisted biblical themes tempered by a slight homoerotic vibe. From the beginning of the Abrahamic religions to today, LGBt+ individuals have been left out of religious contexts at best and damned to hell at worst. Given the author’s experience as a gay trans man, I’m reading the narrator and the other “rural boy” as lovers. The poem contains many instances where the narrator invokes sacred and profane imagery in reference to the same objects or beings, and gives a new sort of “hot take’ on the biblical apocalypse - contributing perfectly to the theme of altered religion.

*

Bibliographical Information:

This poem was posted on Tumblr, and the original source is reblogged below. 

[moonysbitofmagic]

Can we please write more Jewish / Jewish & middle-eastern main characters in stories? As an Israeli Jew, I don’t see nearly enough representation for people like me!

(And I get why you may not want to write an Israeli mc, the Israeli government has and still makes very bad decisions. However, you can separate the character from the government!)

Anyways, here are my pointers for writing good Jewish characters main characters:

1. When picking a first name, please do your research on it! Generic baby-naming websites like nameberry.com will either give you names that don’t actually have Jewish origin or give you the false definition for what Jewish names mean. Instead, take names from the Torah (the Jewish bible) - you can make your own spin on these names if you want to! Or what I like to do is just search up “top baby names in Israel” and take names from there. 

2. When picking a last name, you’ll see many generic last names like “Cohen” and “Goldstein” and “Levy”. Try to avoid these three last names bc they’re super popular - there are so many other last names you can choose from! Just search up good Jewish last names. Also keep in mind that during the Holocaust, many Jews had to change their last names to appear more European/American. Many Jews also had their last names anglicised when coming through Ellis Island in the early 1900s, so that could be important too if your character is American. (A lot of Jews had family that experienced the Holocaust or that went through Ellis Island. Just make sure you do your research and know how to write that well. You can also message me if you need help!) It’s also totally fine to pick “normal” sounding last names - many Jews don’t have Jewish-sounding last names.

LITTLE TIP ABOUT NAMES: some Jews have a Jewish-sounding first name and a not-so-Jewish sounding last name, and vice versa. Some Jews may not have a Jewish-sounding name at all! (like me) If they’re mixed, you can feel free to pick whichever of the parents’ culture’s name you want, or give the mc a middle name or a combined last name!

3. Do your research on the Jewish holidays, what they mean, and when they take place! It’s likely that your mc will pass through at least one holiday during the timeline and celebrate it. Know what the holiday(s) celebrate/commemorate and how they’re celebrated. Different Jews have different ways of celebrating the holidays, but it’s always a variant of how the holiday is generally celebrated. Some types of food are staple during different holidays, so research which foods are typically eaten during which holidays (like chicken soup and matzahs are eaten on Passover, jelly donuts and latkes are eaten on Hannukah, etc)

- Let’s take Hannukah for example. This holiday celebrates the Jews breaking free from the Egyptians, who enslaved them. Every Jew lights a menorah, lighting one candle for each night. Some Jews will have a big dinner each night, some will have a small dinner, some will simply light the candles and say the prayers.

4. Research what denominations of Judaism there are and decide which one your mc is! Just like how there are Catholics and Protestants in Christianity, there are different types of Jews. The three main types are: Orthodox, Conservative, and Reform. Orthodox Jews follow the Torah strictly and are usually very traditional, while Reform Jews adapt Jewish beliefs to modern times and are considered more “progressive”. Conservative Jews are right in between Orthodox and Reform (and unlike the name, they’re not affiliated with any political belief). Each type has their own way of practicing Judaism so make sure to research all of them and their practices! 

- If you choose to have an Orthodox Jewish mc, there can be different sectors of Orthodox Jews (like Hasidic Jews, which are “ultra-orthodox”). Do extra research on Orthodox Jews. They have things like the way they dress and the way they practice Judaism that makes their practices so complex. Some speak Yiddish! The tv show ‘Unorthodox’ portrayed a Hasidic Jewish community in NYC, and while not entirely accurate, it gives you a good depiction of that community.

- Some Jews aren’t that religious, like me! I only go to synagogue for some holidays and only pray on the holidays. However, I embrace the culture! It’s totally okay to write semi-religious characters, but see which things are considered the most important and keep those in. For example: all the Jews I know, regardless of religiousness, celebrate the big holidays like Hannukah and Passover and Rosh Hashanah. I would consider myself a reform Jew. 

5. Try to steer away from Jewish stereotypes. Not all Jews are rich, work at banks, super intelligent, have big noses, run the media, or whatever else you've heard about us. Just like any other culture, we are complex people and don’t stick to the stereotypes (take any other culture and see if the stereotypes are applicable to every single person in the culture - the answer is probably no.) Just like any other mc, make your Jewish mc complex. 

6. Popular Jewish culture is so important! Regardless of religiousness, embracing Jewish culture is super important in in our religion. Because of all the things that Jews have gone through throughout history (ex; the Holocaust), there’s a whole lot of community! I find that a lot of Jews also have a similar taste in humour (or maybe it's just bc I’m around people who find the same things funny) and we all embrace our culture a lot!! Like have you seen how many important or popular figures are Jewish? There’s Ruth Bader Ginsburg, Andy Samberg, Jerry Seinfeld, etc. Although we often go through hardships like antisemitism, many of us like being Jewish and embrace it. 

7. Talking about antisemitism: all Jews have experienced antisemitism at least ONCE. I’ve had people make offensive jokes to my face and behind my back and countless more microaggressions (ex: “I wouldn’t have thought you were Jewish, your nose isn’t that big!”). Some Jews will hide their Star of David necklaces under their shirts while in public to avoid discrimination, some will even hide the fact that they’re Jewish to avoid discrimination. Antisemitism still exists and all Jews are affected by it! It’s not a perfect world, unfortunately. If you want to make your story super realistic, keep that in mind. And, try not to be antisemitic in your writing, obviously.

8. Not every Jew agrees with the Israeli government! Keep this in mind! I heavily criticize the Israeli government and I’m Israeli myself. But also keep in mind that Israel is still considered the Jewish Holy Land and it’s heavily important in Judaism. Jews will still visit Israel and for some, it’s a big deal when they first visit Israel. 

If you have any questions, use the ask section and I will answer asap! I might make a part two if enough people ask questions or if people are interested in writing Israeli characters. I hope this was helpful!

[ugly-crying-over-bucky-barnes]

Blue Eyes Part 27

Summary: After the Garrison is shot up, the youngest Shelby daughter finds a new home in London. She strips herself of her last name and tries to live a peaceful life far away from her brothers’ chaos in Birmingham. But fate leads her right back into it after she runs into Alfie Solomons.

Part 27: Ella and Alfie discuss their potential family. At Lizzie’s party, Ella grows exhausted by her brother’s lack of common sense. 

   “Crucified, Ada. Fucking strung up on a bloody cross and shot.” Ella was smoking on the front steps of Midland with her sister. “It’s all going to shit. Tommy’s gone mad.”

           “It’ll be okay.” Ada tried to assure her. She wanted to have faith in their brother. Wanted to believe that he could crush the fascist movement. If there was a man to do it, then Tommy Shelby was the one.

           “Mosley is trying to get to my fucking husband. I swear to God if anything happens to Alfie…”

           Ada hushed her as their sister-in-law came out. “We’re here to take you to the clinic.” She stopped Gina.

           Ella took the woman in. She was beautiful, and no doubt that was what drew Michael to her in the first place. Dressed smartly, she looked like a movie star. “Nice to meet you, sister.” She said and flicked her cigarette to the sidewalk.

           Gina didn’t appear pleased. “I already told Michael, my husband or no one.”

           Ella frowned. The retort put her off almost instantly. “Well, Michael’s not here and we’ve got a car.”

           “There are taxis, even in this fucking city.”

           She scoffed. “This city? Our family owns this city, so you might as well give it some respect.” Sure, Birmingham had some bad memories and maybe Ella preferred London or Margate. But she highly disliked Gina’s tone when talking about Small Heath.

           Ada stepped in before Ella got nasty. “Look, if they don’t hear a heartbeat, they’re going to give you options, none of which are nice.”

           Gina didn’t listen to her appeal. “My husband may do as he told but I don’t.”

           Ella’s eyes narrowed. “Maybe you should be a little more accommodating to your new family?” She spoke tersely. “We’ve come as support.”

           “I don’t need support,” Gina replied.

           Thoroughly finished with her dismissive attitude, Ella couldn’t hold her tongue even though Ada gave her a warning glance. “Some of us don’t have the privilege of getting pregnant.” Her voice full of venom. “So why don’t you accept the company and stop being so fucking cold?”

           Gina’s mouth popped up in disbelief. But Ada spoke up again to try and stop the situation from becoming hostile. “C’mon, let’s all just start over again.” She said gently. “We genuinely want to be here for you and Michael.”

           Gina held her purse close to her body and took a deep breath.” Fine.” She agreed and continued down the steps toward the car.

           “Relax,” Ada whispered to her sister before she followed Gina.

           “If she’s going to take an attitude with me…”

           “Just leave it.” Ella’s older sister warned. “This isn’t the time to create rifts in the family.”

           “She’s not family,” Ella muttered under her breath but held her tongue for the rest of the day.

~~~~~~~~~

           “Special delivery.” Alfie came into the sitting room and handed Ella an envelope.

           “Hm, I don’t remember the postman being so lovely.” She teased and drew him close for a kiss.

           He chuckled against her lips. “Cheeky girl.”

           After he pulled away, Ella carefully tore open the thick envelope. “Let’s see…” She pulled out the cream-colored invitation with careful penmanship. “It’s an invitation to Lizzie’s party.” She’d been expecting it ever since her brother mentioned the occasion.

           “Right, penned it my diary.” Alfie agreed and settled into his armchair with a heavy sigh. “Just a dinner, right?”

           Ella frowned. “No.”

           “No?”

           “There’s going to be a ballet. A ballet?” She read over the words a few more times in disbelief. “A ballet at Arrow House? How on Earth…”

           “Now hang on, I didn’t agree to go to a ballet.” Alfie protested, a look of grief crossing his face.

           “Well, I didn’t either!” Ella exclaimed and tossed the invitation to the table. “Bollocks.”

           He chuckled. “What? I thought you’d like a ballet.”

           “Why would you think that?”

           The man shrugged and cracked his knuckles. “You’re a woman.”

           His wife scoffed and raised an eyebrow at him almost in a challenge. “So, I should automatically enjoy ballets?”

           Alfie knew when he was beat. He’d made the mistake of underestimating his wife before, so he decided to admit defeat. “I supposed an abhorrence for ballet can be universal.”

           Ella grimaced at the invitation as if it was leering at her from the table. Typical of Tommy to try and get his family to obey the social laws of Britain’s elite. He wanted so desperately for the Shelby family to fit into the social standing. They weren’t made of old money. None of them had inherited a cent. Instead, they made their way, something that most of Britain’s old money would never understand. What was the use in trying to pretend they were one in the same with people who were born in estates and never went hungry? In Ella’s eyes, they were weak and weren’t cut out for the real world like the Shelbys were. They could play both cards, mingling at a social function and wouldn’t be afraid to walk home through every dark alley. The streets were more afraid of them.

           “I need to walk.” Ella stood up. “I don’t want to think about this.”

           “Do you want some company?” Alfie offered.

           She nodded. “If your hip isn’t giving you too much trouble.”

           He heaved himself up out of his chair and whistled for Cyril and Anthea. “Of course not.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

           After bundling up properly and getting the dogs on leads, Ella and Alfie left their flat. Arm in arm, the two were a familiar sight in Camden. The couple frequently took walks together either during Alfie’s lunch break or in the evening when he returned home. Passersby tipped their caps and gave a polite greeting. Sometimes they stopped to chat with neighbors they were close with. It was a familiar landscape and Ella appreciated that. Camden had been her home for so long that she didn’t feel like an outsider as she used to. She wasn’t Jewish but the community had accepted her best they could. Whether it was out of their good graces or fear of backlash from Alfie, Ella wasn’t too sure. But that didn’t matter anymore.

           Passing through Camden Gardens, they arrived at the canal. The dogs tugged on their leads, barking at the ducks that swam past them.            

           “Tommy asked whether we would ever consider adoption,” Ella told Alfie.

           “We’ve already got two dogs, ain’t got enough space for another one.” He replied his mind clearly elsewhere.

           “Not adopting dogs, silly, adopting a child.” She prodded his arm.

           That snapped Alfie out of his daze. He glanced over at her in surprise. “Adoption…what’d you say?”

           “Well, I said we hadn’t thought about it much.” She replied with a shrug. “We haven’t talked much about children at all.”

           Alfie chewed on the inside of his cheek. He had thought about children after the miscarriage. He thought frequently about the things they’d lost and how their children would be nearly three years old had they survived. He tried to imagine how different their lives would be. Chaotic, perhaps, with two toddlers and two dogs. But how lovely it would’ve been. Other than ruminating over what could have been, Alfie hadn’t considered the future of having a family. The doctors pretty much assured Ella that she wouldn’t be able to have children after the shooting. So, they could mourn, but Alfie hadn’t considered the option of adopting. Maybe he’d been caught up on the idea that he wanted children that were his own blood. Was it selfish? Maybe, but it was something he often thought of.

           “I didn’t want to upset you.”

           Ella nodded in understanding. “It’s been a while though.” She reminded him. “Maybe we should talk about it.”

           He met her eyes and considered the possibility. "We can talk about it.”

           There was a silence between them as they stood by the canal. Anthea sat between them, her ears perking up every so often with passing sounds of cars and other people walking.

           “I would like children.” Ella broke the silence. “And wouldn’t it be nice that we could give a child a good home?”

           It did appeal to Alfie’s altruistic side. The man that would take home any pup he found discarded in the street. And to make his wife happy, well there wasn’t anything he wouldn’t do. “Right…but m’fraid that once we adopt one, we won’t stop. Soon it’ll be ten kids all running ‘round the flat because we couldn’t turn them away.” He grinned.

           Ella smiled and touched his chest. “Well, we’ll start with one, how ‘bout that?”

           He nodded and kissed her forehead. “Tommy’ll help us out then?”

           “Well, he owns several orphanages so I’m sure he would.”

           Alfie smiled and hugged his wife close. “I want you to be happy. You being happy makes me fucking happy as can be. You want ten kids; we’ll adopt ten kids.”  

           She giggled and wrapped her arms around his neck. “I think you just want a big Jewish family.” She teased.

           “Well, it were destined, weren’t it? ‘Ccording to me mum at least.”

           “You’ll be the perfect father,” Ella confirmed. “Any child would be lucky to have you as a father.”

           Alfie rested his chin on top of her head as she cuddled into him. He wasn’t quite sure about that. But it didn’t diminish the desire to have a family with Ella.

~~~~~~~~

           The idea of a ballet was nauseating for both Ella and Alfie. But Shelby family events weren’t to be missed unless you were dying in a hospital or going into labor. Since the couple was neither dying nor delivering a baby, they had to attend. Alfie, at least, had the joy of seeing his wife all dressed up like a member of the royal family.

           “Happy birthday, Lizzie.” Ella kissed her sister-in-law’s cheek. “Hope you’re well.”

           “So glad you could make it.” She replied and greeted Alfie. “I hope the drive wasn’t too much of a bother.”

           “Not at all.”

           “Where’s Tommy then?” Alfie looked around the room of elite members of British society.

           “I saw him going into the big room to talk to Mosley,” Polly answered after hugging her niece.

           Ella bristled. “He invited that man?” She snapped. “On what grounds?”

           “On the grounds that he wants to get closer to him,” Lizzie replied with a less than pleased expression on her face.

           Ella looked to Alfie but he just shrugged. She took his arm with a sigh. “Just don’t leave my side.” She mumbled to him. The last thing she wanted was to be caught alone with the MP.

           “Of course.” He replied softly. But secretly, he was hoping to get time alone with the man. Time alone to warn him that if Alfie ever caught him sniffing around Ella, he’d end up buried alive. “Oh look, there’s Michael.” It had been a while since Alfie had gotten a chance to harass the young man.

           “Ella, stay behind for a moment.” Polly requested.

           Reluctantly, Ella let Alfie slip away from her on the promise that he wouldn’t venture too far for too long. “Yes?” She asked her aunt.

           “There’s a woman here asking after your husband.” She directed her niece’s attention toward the blonde woman standing by the fireplace.

           Ella almost would’ve laughed at the absurdity. “Oh yes, we’ve met.”

           Polly frowned. “Who is she?”

           “Why don’t you ask Tommy and his best friend?” She stopped a waiter and grabbed a flute of champagne. “She apparently wants to conduct business with Alfie. She was sent by Tommy but she works for Mosley.”

           “What do you make of it?”

           Ella downed the champagne and made a face. “All I know is he better stop.” She snarled. “This isn’t about Alfie.”

           Polly sighed and kissed her niece’s temple. “Well, you look beautiful. Just try to keep your chin up.”

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Alfie kept his promise and stayed by his wife. He stayed by her when Tommy waved them both over.

           Ella’s grip tightened on her husband’s hand when she saw Oswald Mosley standing beside her brother and sister-in-law.

           “Am I gonna hafta hold you back, love?” Alfie teased. But inside, his blood was boiling. Oh, what he wouldn’t do to take this poor excuse for a man out back and blow his brains out.

           She gritted her teeth. “Perhaps.”

            Tommy cleared his throat as the two approached. “Alfie, I’d like you to meet Oswald Mosley. Mr. Mosley, this is my sister’s husband, Alfie Solomons.”

           The MP put on a nice smile but there was a hint of smugness behind it. As if he knew he already won. “Your reputation precedes you, Mr. Solomons.”

           “Does it? Well, I s’pose people talk, don’t they?” Alfie was on edge but didn’t show it. He could walk into the belly of the beast with a self-assured smile on his face and a laid-back demeanor. It’s how he called the bluff of so many men who wanted to destroy him. “But this night is about me sister-in-law. Mazel Tov, Lizzie.”

           The Hebrew seemed to cause an involuntary twitch in Mosley’s face. But he recovered quickly. “Yes, the birthday girl. In an effort of being honest with each other, I believe it was a bottle of champagne and an evening well spent.”

           Ella’s jaw dropped. “You little-”

           Lizzie stopped her from going off on the man. She reached into her purse and pulled out a coin. “Actually, it was an evening wasted.” She plopped the coin into Mosley’s drink. “For the champagne and brandy you bought me. I appear to recall it was the booze that put you to sleep prematurely.”

           Tommy, Polly, and Ella all hid their smiles in their drinks. Alfie, on the other hand, wasn’t as good as holding back. He burst out laughing and clinked his glass with Lizzie’s. “I tell ya, Mosley, you ain’t never known a strong woman ‘til you’ve married into the Shelby family. Mazel Tov, Lizzie. Happy birthday, love.”

           Before tempers flared, Tommy stepped in. “The dance will be beginning soon.” He explained and began to direct them towards the back door.

           Ella pointedly looked a Mosley before leaning in to kiss Alfie. “I love you.” She murmured adoringly.  

~~~~~~~~~~~

           Alfie was close to falling asleep. He wasn’t quite out cold like Arthur was, but he was dozing off. Ella was a bit more attentive but wasn’t completely taken by the ballet. If anything, she was a bit concerned, she didn’t think humans could be so flexible. It was quite alarming.  

           Bored, she glanced over to see her aunt had disappeared. At the same time, Tommy was trying to get Arthur’s attention.

           Ella kicked her eldest brother awake. “Psst.” She pointed over to Tommy once Arthur stirred. She noticed a pair of headlights flooding over the lawn and became a bit unnerved. It was unlikely to be a late guest.

           Alfie grumbled under his breath when he felt his wife shift in her seat. “El, where’ya going? Is it over?”

           “No, stay here.” She whispered and quietly slipped out of her seat and out of the tent. She tried to catch up with her brother but his strides were much longer than hers. Halfway across the lawn, she paused to try and see who was standing in front of the headlights. Before her eyes

could adjust to the blinding light, she heard a loud gunshot crack across the dark night. Instinct brought her to the ground. Curling into herself and protecting her stomach.

           Everything went quiet for a moment. In the distance, she could hear the music from the ballet as it came to a bloody conclusion.

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[evermoreholland]

Questions (Peter Parker x Jewish!Reader)

Title: Questions

Pairing: Peter Parker x Jewish!Reader

Summary: Peter has lived in a Jewish neighborhood the majority of his life, but he has never once tried to learn more about the people living there. That was until he met you.

Requested: No.

Word Count: 1.9k!

Author’s Note: This story is more of a platonic pairing. The reader teaches Peter about her religion because he’s curious. He watches the reader do certain things that she wouldn’t question, but he did because it was different for him.

I am Jewish but some of my facts could still possibly be incorrect. Feel free to correct me and leave feedback.

--

It was your first day at Midtown High and you were nervous. All of your life you have lived in a small town, but you’re family decided to move to a larger community. Your father was appointed to be the new Rabbi at the Modern-Orthodox synagogue in Queens. Although you were happy for him, it was hard to move to a big city. 

It seemed weird to your father at first that you were even going to Midtown. There were many Jewish schools in New York that you could go to. You had a love for science and your mother didn’t mind sending you. You planned study lessons with your father after school so you could still learn Judaic studies.

Your family was Modern-Orthodox. You kept Kosher and Shabbat, which are laws directly from the Torah. However, you didn’t keep all of the typical Orthodox customs. Your mother didn’t wear a sheitel (wig for hair covering), but instead, she would wear scarves or baseball caps. Sometimes she didn’t cover her hair at all. You did participate in all of the Jewish holidays, not just Hanukkah and Passover.

You got ready for school like you normally would. You woke up, you got dressed in your skirt and long sleeve top, and then you prayed. After that, you went to the kitchen to make breakfast for yourself and then prepared your lunch. You saw that your sister, Gilah, hadn’t packed her lunch yet. 

“Gilah, do you need me to help you pack your lunch?” you asked your younger sister. 

“Yes, please. Ima (Hebrew for mom) told me to ask you before we went to school,” she replied. Your sister was 8 and she didn’t know how to pack herself a well-balanced lunch, so you would usually have to help her out. 

You had 3 older brothers and one younger sister. Your brothers were in yeshiva (post high school program for Torah study) and they were out of the house so you took on the job of helping out your younger sister.

You packed lunches for the two of you, grabbed breakfast, and then made your way out the door to walk Gilah and yourself to school.

“Y/N, don’t forget that we need to call Bubbe after school to tell her about our day!” your sister said on your walk. Every day after school you would visit your grandmother and talk to her about your day. Since you moved, you would have to call her instead.

“I could never forget, Gilah,” you said. You dropped Gilah off at school and then made your way to Midtown. When you approached the building your first thought was: This school is huge. Typically, Jewish day schools are much smaller in size. 

You made your way in and honestly, you were a bit overwhelmed by the size of the school. You got your schedule and made your way to your locker. You looked to your right and saw that your locker neighbors with a brown-haired boy. A very cute boy. At least that’s what you saw from his side profile.

“Hi, excuse me?” you asked. Then the boy turned around and you definitely confirmed to yourself that he was cute. 

“Y-yeah?” he stuttered.

“I’m Y/N L/N. Ummm, I’m a junior and I’m new here. I was wondering if you could show me where the lab is?” you asked him. You were here a few minutes early. Doesn’t hurt to ask.

“Sure. I’m actually going there too. I’m Peter by the way. Peter Parker,” he said with a smile. You both then made your way to the lab for your first period class.

“So what made you move here?” Peter asked.

“My dad got a new job,” you said simply.

“What does your dad do?” Peter asked.

“He’s a Rabbi,” you said.

“So you’re Jewish? That’s so cool! Do you happen to live in Forest Hills?” Peter asked. Peter lived in Forest Hills which was mostly a Jewish neighborhood.

“I do actually,” you said.

“I live there too, but I’m not Jewish. I love my neighbors though. I even went to my neighbors Hanukkah party this year!” Peter rambled. “Sorry for rambling.”

“Don’t apologize,” you said and finally you were in the lab.

You were enjoyed Midtown. You liked the classes you were in and the students were really nice. 

It was lunch and you made your way to the cafeteria. You spot Peter at a table with his friends. He locked eyes with you and waved.

“Can I sit with you?” you asked as you approached his table. 

“Sure,” he said as patted the seat next to him. 

You pulled out your lunch bag and then pulled out your salad. Before taking a bite, you said a quick prayer and then ate. Peter noticed you mumbling to yourself.

“Did you say something Y/N?” Peter asked curiously.

“I was just saying a quick prayer. No biggie,” you said as you kept eating. Peter was curious as to why you packed your own lunch. School lunch at Midtown came for free with tuition. 

“If you don’t mind me asking, why did you pack your own lunch?” Peter said.

“Oh, I don’t mind the question. I keep Kosher,” you said. Peter settled for that answer. He didn’t know anything about keeping Kosher, but he didn’t want to pry. He would just look it up later. 

“What is Kosher exactly?” Peter’s friend said.

“Ned! Can we not bother her about every little detail please?” Peter asked Ned.

“It’s okay to ask questions, Peter. In Judaism, people encourage us to ask. We are all about asking questions and learning more,” you said and then Peter urged you to go on.

“The word ‘kosher’ is Hebrew for ‘fit’ or ‘appropriate’, and kosher foods are those foods that are deemed fit by the regulations of kashrut, the Jewish dietary law,” you said.

“Is it really important?” Peter asked. He didn’t want to come off as rude, he genuinely wanted to know. 

“It’s actually one of the most important aspects of our religion. It’s a way to uphold the fundamentals of our beliefs,” you said. “There are specific foods that are deemed appropriate by kashrut such as land animals that have cloven hooves and chew their cud. We’re allowed to eat most birds. And also no shellfish,” you continued.

“So you can’t eat bacon?” Peter asked.

“Correct, pigs don’t chew their cud. Also, they’re super cute,” you said with a giggle. “There are many more laws involving Kosher, such as symbols on snacks and stuff, but I don’t want to bore you.”

“That’s really interesting. Some of my Jewish neighbors don’t do that though,” Peter said.

“That’s because everyone’s on their own level. Not all Jews are the same. Some can be completely secular and only celebrate traditional holidays like Hanukkah, others keep the Sabbath and Kosher and follow all of the laws and customs, and some are in between,” you said.

“What are some of the key fundamentals of Judaism?” Peter said. He wanted to know more. 

“Lunch break isn’t long enough for that, Peter. You could come over one day and we can have a discussion about it, if you want. Don’t feel pressured though. It’s a lot of information,” you said.

“You free today?” Peter asked. That questioned made you smile. This was all new to you too. All of your life you had Jewish friends so some of this stuff was hard to explain. 

“Yeah. I just need to text my parents to see if they’ll be home,” you said as you began to text your parents. They texted you back and they didn’t really want you bringing a boy home, but you convinced them.

“They gave the okay. I just have to pick up my sister from school, call my grandmother, and then you can come over,” you said.

Peter, Ned, and you exchanged numbers. Ned decided on not coming this time around, which was fine.

Peter was nervous about coming to your house. What if he said something offensive by accident? He also didn’t want to come to your house empty-handed but he didn’t know which Kosher symbols your family held. He decided on shooting you a quick text before going to the store.

Peter: Hey. I don’t want to come to your house empty-handed. What Kosher symbols do you follow? 

You read the text and smiled. He’s so sweet.

Y/N: That’s so sweet of you Peter. We usually get snacks with CRC, OU, and the k with the star around it :)

Peter: Ok thanks. I’ll be there soon.

You were excited that Peter was interested in your religion, but did he actually want to be your friend? Well, maybe he did. You didn’t really know.

He came to your house, treats in hand, and gave a light knock on your front door. He was met with what he assumes to be your mother.

“Hello. You must be Peter, come in,” she said with a welcoming smile.

“I brought you some coffee cake,” Peter said as he handed your mother the treat.

“I love this brand. Thank you, Peter. Y/N, come to the living room. Your friend is here!” your mom said.

“Hey Peter,” you said as you made your way to the living room.

“Hey,” he said.

“My dad should be home soon. He just had to go to prayer services at the synagogue,” you said.

Your father came home about five minutes later and he was eager to learn with you.

“Y/N, what books did you pick out for today’s session?” He asked as he made his way to sit by the two of you.

“Abba, I didn’t pick out any books today,” you said.

“Why not?” He asked.

“Well Mr. L/N... wait, or is it Rabbi L/N?” Peter asked.

“It’s usually Rabbi but whatever you’re comfortable with,” your father said.

“Well anyway, I came over because Y/N was teaching me about Judaism during school because I wanted to know more. We didn’t really finish talking about it,” Peter said.

“Why do you want to know more, Peter?” Your father questioned. 

“Ummmm, maybe it’s because I lived all my life in this neighborhood and I never once acknowledged their religion,” Peter said.

“Maybe that’s because you don’t care about the religion someone’s affiliated with, you just care about the person that they are,” you chi med. 

“I guess so,” Peter said simply.

“Why do you want to know more now?” your father asked.

“Because I met your daughter and I knew that I was going to be friends with the minute I saw her. I want to know more because it’s a part of who she is. I may not be religious but I want to know what makes Y/N the way she is,” Peter said. He was proud of his answer. You were proud of his answer. 

Peter and you got along pretty well after that. You didn’t only talk about your religion. You talked about each other. You realized you liked a lot of the things that Peter liked as well. You’ve been hanging out ever since the first day of school. You really fit in with Peter and his friends. Peter would come over twice a week to hang out with you and to do homework. Peter kept asking questions about Judaism. You were happy to answer. He stopped asking as much because Peter knew that your religion wasn’t the only thing that made you who you are. It is a big part of your identity, but not the only part. He then started more questions about you. You were definitely happy to answer those questions.

--

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Masterlist

[rsadelle]

The best books I read in 2020

I read 167 books in 2020, which is a little more than one and a half times as many as I read in 2019. (I had a crisis of counting at one point when I read a string of novellas, but ultimately came down on the side of if I can check out the ebook from the library as a single volume, then it counts as a book for the purposes of my list.) Only ten of those are books I reread, which is a fairly low reread number/percentage for me. The large number of books I read this year made it extra difficult to narrow down a small number of the best ones, which is why this list is longer than in previous years. It is, in fact, long enough that I have put it behind a cut to spare your dash.

Top 11 fiction books/series I read for the first time in 2020

Bread Alone trilogy (Bread Alone, The Baker's Apprentice, and Baker's Blues) by Judith Ryan Hendricks - I so enjoyed this trilogy about bread baking and figuring out your life and building a home/community and love. I read it at the beginning of the pandemic, when everyone was baking bread, and it was one of those things I was sad to finish because I didn't want to leave the characters.

Never Have I Ever by Joshilyn Jackson - I have read a lot of suburban housewife with a secret books over the last couple of years. This was an excellent example of the genre with the good use of a thematic motif and a second secret reveal after you learn what you think is the biggest secret. Content notes: I had to skim a few chapters because of the large amount of weight and disordered eating content (which is relevant to the character), and there is sexual abuse of a young teenager by an adult as part of the story.

The City We Became by N.K. Jemisin - This was such an interesting concept and done so well. It was one of the most popular books my sci fi book club read this year, and the New Yorker in our group said it was her favorite New York book ever. The most disappointing part of this book is that it's the first book in a trilogy and the other books haven't been published yet. Content notes: eldritch horror and realistic racism.

The Sci-Regency Series (My Fair Captain, The Englor Affair, My Regelence Rake, Diplomatic Relations, and My Highland Laird) by J.L. Langley - The delightfully ludicrous premise of this series is that there is a gay Regency society in space, which makes for some really fun romances. I've loved this series for over a decade, and I was thrilled to reread the first three books before reading the two new books that came out this summer. I recommend reading the novels in order, as there is an overarching plot involving the Intergalactic Navy that is interesting and ongoing without overshadowing the romances. Content note: these are on the erotica end of the romance spectrum, which means they have very explicit sex scenes. I wrote a lot more about this series in a Yuletide promo post comment.

The Most Fun We Ever Had by Claire Lombardo - I was so sad to finish this book! I have read a lot of commercial/literary fiction about families in the past few years, and this might be my favorite. I found the characters really compelling and enjoyed seeing their differing perspectives. I didn't want to leave this family.

Throne of Glass series (Throne of Glass, Crown of Midnight, Heir of Fire, Queen of Shadows, Empire of Storms, Tower of Dawn, and Kingdom of Ash) by Sarah J. Maas - This YA fantasy series shouldn't work given its constant escalation, and yet, somehow it does. I greatly enjoyed it, and I cried more than once at the last book. This is a series where I recommend not reading anything about future books until you've read all the books before them so you can enjoy the continual reveals. These are very much genre novels, and if you don't like the genre, these books will not be for you. Content note: there is a lot of genre-typical violence.

The Great Believers by Rebecca Makkai - I admit that I was mildly skeptical about this book given that what I knew about it was that it was a story about the AIDS epidemic where one of the two timelines is about a woman trying to reconnect with her daughter, but I ended up loving it. The two alternating timelines fit together beautifully, and I thought it did a good job of not eliding the horror of the AIDS epidemic experienced by the gay community in favor of the straight woman's experience. I do remain skeptical of how many awards it won; while it was a genuinely excellent book, I also know that awards bodies love dead queer people.

We Set the Dark on Fire and We Unleash the Merciless Storm by Tehlor Kay Mejia - I loved this YA dystopianish (more cultural class divide than apocalypse or singular villain in control) duology about queer women falling in love while working toward revolution. The world building was good, the plot was good, and the romance was good.

Sisters of the Vast Black by Lina Rather - This novella about an order of nuns who travel through space in an organic slug-like spaceship was absolutely wonderful. It deals with issues of faith, purpose, central control, and doing what you can to make the world a better place.

Sorcery of Thorns by Margaret Rogerson - I loved this YA novel in a sort of Regency-ish setting about a girl who grew up in a library full of magic books and her dealings with some sorcerers, complete with a romance. Content note: attempted mental coercion and institutionalization.

The Wren Hunt and The Wickerlight by Mary Watson - This is a YA duology about rival druid groups in modern day Ireland. I found both books totally compelling with interesting druid politics and magic. It was also really interesting how well we get to see the worst of both sides of the rival druid groups in the two different books.

Top 5 books/series I read and then thought about a lot in 2020

The Twisted Ones by T. Kingfisher - A friend recommended the author to me. This particularly book is a supernatural horror novel I don't necessarily recommend. However, I have continued to think about elements of it since I read it. (Before you @ me about the author's other work, this was the third of her books I read and the other two were in the more beloved fantasy novel genre.)

The Calculating Stars by Mary Robinette Kowal - I actually didn't like this book that much. We read it for a book club, and it had an interesting concept that wasn't super well executed. However, I have thought about elements of it a lot since then, particularly in comparison to some of the other sci fi I encountered this year.

Gideon the Ninth and Harrow the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir - I don't know how much "I actively thought about these a lot" describes my actual experience of having read these, but given their popularity and the number of conversations I had about them, I can't omit them from this post entirely. I liked the first one once I figured out what kind of story it actually was, had absolutely no idea what was happening at any point in the second one, and discovered with both of them that I have a much more limited vocabulary than I thought, at least when it comes to death-related words. I am invested enough that I will read the third book when it comes out, but probably won't read any more of the author's work beyond that. If you want to know more about what I thought, I wrote a very spoilery post about them.

The Sixth World (Trail of Lightning and Storm of Locusts) by Rebecca Roanhorse - This is a pair of novels set in a post-apocalyptic world where there's a magically/divinely-erected wall around Dinétah (the Navajo lands). The worldbuilding and characters are so interesting, and it's a series where some of the details stuck with me and I would randomly think of them. I'm looking forward to reading one of her other books in a few months for my sci fi book club.

Wild Mercy: Living the Fierce and Tender Wisdom of the Women Mystics by Mirabai Starr - This was one of two books about women mystics I read and disliked this year, and the more disappointing of the two as I'd heard an interview with the author that I found interesting. I continued to think about this one a lot in an angry, "and another thing!" way, which did help me articulate more of the things I dislike about new age-ish framing of "feminine" wisdom/divinity/knowledge.

Top 3 non-fiction books I read in 2020

The Vagina Bible: The vulva and the vagina - separating the myth from the medicine by Dr. Jen Gunter - This is probably better as a reference work than as a straight read-through, but it was interesting enough to read straight through. The book is deeply rooted in science and facts, and she has a whole chapter on "Vaginas and Vulvas in Transition" specifically about anatomy for trans people.

Here All Along: Finding Meaning, Spirituality, and a Deeper Connection to Life - in Judaism (After Finally Choosing to Look There) by Sarah Hurwitz - This is a useful, contemporary introduction to Judaism from someone who shares a lot of my values. The first half is an introduction to Jewish thought, while the second half focuses more on spirituality and practice. The book is part general introduction and part spiritual memoir. I found it deeply inspirational and I added it to a wish list of books I want to own copies of (I read it as a library ebook) because I would like to both reread it in hardcopy where I can easily flip back and forth and use it as a resource for further study and reading.

You Can Draw in 30 Days by Mark Kistler - You may remember that I wrote more about this when I originally finished reading the book. I found it a gentle, funny, helpful book to teach you the basics of drawing.

The 2 authors I read the most in 2020

Jennifer Lynne Barnes - I read fifteen of her books in three weeks in January, when I was still working full time, and a sixteenth after it was published later in the year. Her books are fast-read YA novels that are deeply engaging and generally have some sort of mystery element to them which may or may not involve family secrets. She has a tendency to write variations of the same characters, which meant that I enjoyed mentally mapping the characters from various books onto characters from other books. Also, her werewolf trilogy does one of my favorite werewolf story things that you almost never see (but it doesn't happen until the end of the first book, so I won't spoil it by telling you what it is). Many of her books involve violence, so heed the summaries or email/message me if you want some content notes.

Laura Lippman - I read nineteen of her books this year, eighteen novels and a non-fiction essay collection. She's an excellent mystery writer with a distinctive voice. The time I read four of her books in four days, I found myself thinking in her style. Even if I hadn't otherwise enjoyed My Life As A Villainess, her essay collection, it would have been worth reading just for the kicker on "The Thirty-First Stocking." Content note: her novels frequently involve violence or its aftermath.

[titusmoody]

2021 Q2 stuff

Games

Return of the Obra Dinn -- Very different. A great experience to play, it doesn’t use any typical “gamer” skills or knowledge. It also hit on a lot of my personally prefered sensibilities (stories self-contained to ships, non-linear storytelling, mysteries, and meticulous attention to detail)

Kentucky Route Zero -- Even more different. I’m glad I played it for the atmosphere, though it didn’t click with me the way Obra Dinn did. Extremely atmospheric and cool, but also has a strong academic curiosity to it.

DOOM (2016)-- Okay, we’re back to regular video games. Everything about this one seems very carefully crafted. I had a good, mindless time with this one.

Spider-Man -- Not as well-crafted as DOOM, but also less juvenile. I also had a good, mindless time with this one.

Metroid: Samus Returns -- Feels like Metroid. The moment-to-moment combat is different than Super Metriod and Fusion, which is a nice way to keep things from getting stale.

TV

Shadow and Bone -- Sometimes tropes exist because they make for good stories. This show was a good example of that.

Pani Poni Dash -- WTF Japan, in a good way

Princess Tutu -- Much like I felt about Cowboy Bebop, this show was very well-made and I had an easy time appreciating what it was doing, though in the end it’s not the kind of thing that’s really for me

Miss Kobayashi’s Dragon Maid -- Pleasant to watch, mostly lighthearted but could definitely have emotional moments here and there to keep you interested.

Kakegurui -- Shows like this are the reason anime fans are so self-depricating. It was thoroughly trashy, but I’d be lying if I said that the trashiness didn’t lead to a lot of fun.

Love, Chunibyo, and other Delusions -- An excellent comfort-watch. About a high-schooler trying to run away from his cringe-y middle school phase. I definitely have criticisms of it, but I’m also definitely going to watch it again.

Devilman Crybaby -- I swear, Masaaki Uasa takes the most overdone premises and portrays them in such bonkers ways that they become pretty cool. This isn’t one of the best examples of that, but it still works.

Gundam 0080: War in the Pocket -- Part of Gundam’s brand is that it shows the effect of wars on individuals. This is a great small-scale example of that. 

She-Ra -- It’s good. The plot kinda meanders and the backstory lore is presented confusingly/unclearly at times. But the central characters are good enough to carry at least a few seasons, and the secondary characters really elevate the whole thing. I was personally very fond of Scorpia as well as the way the writers used Entrapta both in the plot and as a character foil.

Chernobyl -- Second time watching this, it’s definitely a favorite. 

Movies

Mamma Mia: Here We Go Again -- You already know what this is like and whether or not you enjoy the sort of thing it is. 

Moulin Rouge -- It’s hard to watch Mamma Mia without thinking of this one, so I watched it soon after.

Minari -- My personal reward for being fully vaccinated was to go to the movies by myself. This was a good movie, though overshadowed by the circumstances in which I saw it. I would’ve been very happy to be seeing anything.

My Fair Lady -- An iconic pop-culture touchstone. Not my favorite musical, for sure.

Interstellar -- This movie is in the odd position of currently being my favorite Christopher Nolan movie despite the fact that I don’t like it nearly as much as I liked either The Dark Knight or Memento when I saw those for the first time.

The Perfect Storm -- George Clooney, big wave.

Legally Blonde -- I didn’t hear the term “sitcom” until oddly late in life, and when I heard it, I assumed it meant movies like this where there aren’t a ton of jokes, but the characters are constantly in inherently funny situations. I don’t like this type of humor that much.

Jurassic Park -- A big “moral” of the movie was “don’t trust computers to do anything important” but today it’s hard not to get the message as “never underpay your system administrator” instead.

Apollo 13 -- Pretty good

ET -- I really didn’t like this movie and I don’t quite know what it doesn’t do that Jurassic Park and Indiana Jones do. Imminent danger seem to be part of it, but I don’t think that’s the whole picture.

The Day After Tomorrow -- *shrug* I had fun watching it

Pearl Harbor -- expected it to be bad, it was bad. It was definitely bad in interesting ways, and was almost good a lot of the time.

Die Hard -- I was looking for suspenseful movies with clear character motivation and this fit the description. It was good, though I didn’t like it quite as much as I hoped to.

Star Trek V -- Star Trek is often silly and I just can’t get on board with some of the silliness, like the last part of this movie.

Terminator 2 -- Yeah, I do like suspense. I don’t think I’ll look back on this as a favorite, but I was pretty into it. Moreso than Die Hard.

Cast Away -- Pretty good

Predator -- Somewhere between Die Hard and Terminator 2. I was a bit bored by the end, which ironically was the part that most closely resembled what I was looking for.

Braveheart -- I think romanticising medieval Europe is fun and cool. Unfortunately this movie has some creepy sexual hang-ups as well as rampant “no step on snek” energy that ruin the whole thing.

Redline -- Just a cool looking movie

State of Play -- I forgot the whole plot of this already, but I enjoyed it

Troy -- It’s not as bad as its reputation suggests, though the end does get really over-the-top cheesy

Demon Slayer -- I liked going to the movies by myself so much the first time that I did it again. This time it was in a much more full theater and I was one of very few people over 17. Fun action anime movie, though.

Gladiator -- I’m so disappointed that I didn’t connect to this movie, since over and over I felt like I was very close to loving it. I think the revenge motivation was what ultimately prevented me from really getting into it.

K-19: The Widowmaker -- Hell yeah, extremely tense submarine scenes, that’s exactly what I wanted.

The Manchurian Candidate (2004) -- The movie felt like it wanted its premise to feel plausible, but it really didn’t. Still pretty good, though

The Big Lebowski -- Still not a big fan of this one. 

The Naked Gun -- This confirms that my sense of humor has not gotten more refined since age 17 or so. I still thought this was pretty funny.

Dances With Wolves -- Mostly just boring. 

Angels and Demons -- Even at age 15 the book’s riddles and clues premise felt a bit too contrived. The movie has the additional disadvantage that verbal explanations are the most boring way to resolve questions, unlike books where words are all you have.

Chinatown -- Meh, a fine detective story but nothing really clicked with me. The director’s life is wild, though. He escaped the holocaust, had his pregnant wife murdered by the Manson family, and is currently a fugitive from justice for raping a 13 year old.

The Core -- Like The Perfect Storm, appealing in the “so bad it’s good” way.

Porco Rosso -- Think the type of character study of Kiki’s Delivery Service, but about a middle-aged man, so it doesn’t resonate with Miyazaki’s audience enough for many people to talk about it.

Uncut Gems -- My second time watching it, it’s definitely a favorite. Between this and A Serious Man, I seem to love extremely stressful movies about mediocre jewish men.

The Manchurian Candidate (1962) -- Interesting to compare/contrast with the other version. I like both

Galaxy Quest -- another movie that fits my personal definition of what “sitcom” should mean. Again, not my favorite type of humor

Fantastic Planet -- Looks like something between the animated sketches in Monty Python and Pink Floyd’s The Wall. Very weird, it personally really worked for me.

Scarface -- I think romanticising organized crime is fun and cool. 

In the Heights -- colorful, catchy, happy and fun. 

Books

The House in the Cerulean Sea -- a good comfort-read. very simplistic and a little clunky and amateur-ish, but ultimately pretty cute.

There There -- not a comfort-read at all. A super raw look at the modern life of a variety of Native American situations. Very harsh but also interesting.

Six of Crows -- Fine YA fantasy fluff.

[eeveemasters]

hey, all you lovely people!  full disclosure i talk a lot and i have thought about this character thoroughly when you look under that read more... oh boy... just a heads up. anywho... guess i’m the last here i see, well, that’s typical. I’m late to literally everything, although this time I do have a good excuse. i’d tell you what it is but you don’t really wanna read about me gettin’ it in all weekend and drew is my bro -like literally. we share blood. we came outta the same womb. 26 hours of labor. 19 minutes apart. our poor mother-  so he def doesn’t wanna read about it and that is a swill of information about me before ya even know my name which says a lot, doesn’t it? inst-y-ways, I’m maddie and I’m Jewish, you’ll figure out why i’m putting that out there now. also hello again. i hope y’all are ready to get this party started, cause this is where it’s at! look below & hit that read more and I will tell you all about my baby girl, Eevee.

TW: DEATH, DEPRESSION, STALKER, MURDER, KIDNAPPING

★ ━  ( candice patton,   cis-female,   she/her )  ━ ★   just to be clear, ya didn’t get this information from me.   The person you’re lookin’ for is     EVELYN LUCIA MASTERS.   also known as     EEVEE.    Last I heard she was born on   APRIL 7TH, 1988    in    SAN ANTONIO, TEXAS,   but she’s been livin’ in   RICHMOND,    for about    EIGHT MONTHS.    Word around the districts is, this doll,    EEVEE  can be    VENGEFUL,   SELF-RIGHTEOUS,   &    A KNOW-IT-ALL,   but i gotta tell, ya, alls I seen is good things, like the fact that she’s   RESILIENT,   CHARISMATIC,    &     ENERGETIC.   I guess that depends on how well ya know ‘em, though.   the last thing ya need to know is that she works as an   A-LIST ACTRESS  &  CO-OWNER OF EXCALIBUR COMICS.  I don’t know much about what that’s all about but I do know that’s all I can tell ya the rest you gotta find out on ya, own.  ━     ( ooc:  maddie,   pst,   28,   she/her ) 

Evelyn Lucia Masters.

the irony of her name is that it means “wished for child”

she was definitely not.

hence why she goes by... 

Eevee. 

Yes, like the Pokemon.

No, it’s not a stage name or a gimmick.

She legally changed her name.

It’s on her credit card. ( so are kittens! )  

Born in San Antonio Texas.

Jewish, Bisexual & Very Proud.

Collette Rivers

Her mother.

One of the first and few Black, Soap Opera stars.

Had a wildly popular sitcom for a hot minute.

Career was on fire in the 80′s & 90′s.

Transitioned to clothing designer and eventually a reality tv real housewife when she couldn’t get jobs anymore.

Joseph Masters.

Her Father.

a former actor

was very well known for CSI.

was on broadway.

became a sought after director.

it’s a whole family in the biz, so of course...

@ two years of age, Eevee became an Actress™

baby diaper commercials with her mom.

then singing lessons.

then dance lessons.

then pageants.

more commercials.

a bit of child modeling.

more commercials.

reoccurring kid on sesame street.

then a reoccurring (but not staring) role on Gullah Gullah Island.

1998. She’s 10.

lands a role on Broadway opposite Leon Thomas III as Nala in The Lion King. 

this is the jumping-off point of her career. where it really shot off

but ignoring that for a minute...

Eevee has 5 other siblings.

4 of them are alive.

when Eevee was 15 she’d just gotten season 1st ( and eventually only ) season of her Disney show renewed and she had a stalker. on her 16th birthday, the stalker snuck into her sweet 16, cornered her when she and her older, brother Elias were alone, stabbed Elias, and kidnapped Eevee. Elias was rushed to the hospital when they found him but died shortly after.  They found Eevee, recovered her from the stalker unharmed, but when she asked about Elias... shortly after Eevee sunk deeper into her depression, and also suffered from survivors’ guilt and eventually had to stay in a mental hospital and was released a year later, a few days after her 17th birthday. being in the real world was hard for her and in a few weeks time, became legally emancipated from her parents because her father had taken control of monitoring her finances, her decisions, and became too controlling of her schedule and time out of his concern for her and her mother acted like none of it happened and expected Eevee to pick up where she left off and to get more jobs and keep working. It was an environment detrimental to her health and sanity so she had to get out of that and got her own place and moved away from her parents and unfortunately, her twin sister and younger brother.

Took a break from acting to finish high school.

had to have private tutors

excelled at the school aspect of her life.

had very few friends but she did have a girlfriend.

eventually, Eevee broke up with her

to seize her 5 minutes of fame she outted Eevee as a lesbian to TMZ.

It didn’t take long for Eevee to speak out.

At 17, in 2005, Eevee came out publically as Bisexual.

as a Black 17-year-old girl she was proud of herself.

but it did not go well for her in the media or in magazines.

didn’t help what little career she had left.

but she also kinda didn’t care

Became known for outspoken activism for LGBTQ+ youth.

Started her own charity and outreach program to finance and help struggling youth in the LGBTQ+ community by providing them with shelter, food, and treatment for health issues both mental and physical.  

went to college...

Northwestern State University.

joined the Alpha Kappa Alpha sorority

double-majored in theater and business

got married to one of her best friends at one point to help him out with his financial situation.

graduated with degrees. 

and real friends in and out of her sorority.

WORKED HER ASS OFF TO GET HER CAREER BACK ON TRACK.

it took a lot of hard work.

a lot of mediocre jobs.

a lot of auditions. 

a lot of shmoozing & playing the long game.

she pulled every single string

cashed every single favor

ate a lot of shit.

including going to her mother whom she hadn’t spoken to in six years.

EVENTUALLY ROSE BACK TO THE A-LIST WITH A VENGENCE.

Several Independent Films.

Supporting roles in TV shows.

Supporting roles in a few movies.

Starring roles in a number of pilots that never got greenlit.

Starring roles in 2 tv shows. 

one was canceled the first season.

the other had THREE SEASONS.

won an Emmy

Outstanding Supporting Actress in a Drama Series

landed a few ad campaigns

Eevee went back to Broadway a few times over the years.

Bring It On: The Musical

played Danielle

won a tony

Best Featured Actress in a Musical.

Newsies: The Musical

played Katherine.

dream come true.

Hadestown

played Eurydice.

nominated for a Tony.

The Lion King

played adult Nala.

life coming full circle.

Currently stars in her own Netflix show. 

season 2 just finished filming which is why she has moved to Portland.

PERSONALITY:

very much a complete dork. loves video games, loves comic books, has a lot of memorabilia all through her house, it’s practically a dork museum, always telling puns. always joking. always been an adorable ray of sunshine. she really likes to be a light and enforce positivity for her friends and others.

talks far too much for her own good especially when she’s nervous.

very kind, generous, and loving, always willing to help a friend.

always willing to cook for someone as a way to comfort them. She’s a well-versed home chef and an excellent baker.

she’s in-between the vodka aunt and the mom friend. she’s the first to suggest doing shots and getting fucked up, but she’ll also make sure everyone’s okay and be responsible.

She’s that friend who if you fuck with one of her friends in any way she will go into protective mamma bear mode and straight-up end that person for you. if you need someone to back you up in a fight, literally, and have your back she is your girl.

she isn’t great at flirting or really being around anyone she finds attractive, she turns into a rambling, nonstop talking, pile of adorable.

up until the end of December last year, she was a virgin. She’s only ever slept with one person so she’s not really the sleep around kind of girl but respects those who do, you do you boo, but also please don’t mistake her for a relationship type girl either. she’s neither. she’s great at fooling around and hookups that usually stop before they get to the sex part. she’s actually just very awkward when it comes to intimacy and feelings and getting close to people in that way. It fucks with her anxiety so she just needs someone who can get her out of her head and that is very hard to find for her.

She’s a feminist and believes women should be there to support each other, but also is aware that feminism isn’t always equal and some women don’t include her as a woman to support because she is a woman of color and because she’s Black and will call someone out on their white feminist or anti-black bullshit.

she’s kind but is in no way a pushover. she’s very opinionated and steadfast and isn’t afraid to reason with someone and argue with them and stand up for herself.

POSSIBLE CONNECTIONS:

Friends: people who can put up with her non-stop chatter and find it endearing.

Fake Friends: people who are using her for fame, recognition and what her name can do for them.

Crushes: could be one-sided, could be both-sided, let’s talk about it.

Boxing Friendship: sparing partners, or someone who sees her at the boxing gym in her workout outfits that include but is not limited to color-coordinated custom gloves, that match both her outfit, her shoes, her gym bag and the giant cheerleading bow on the top of her high ponytail,  but has never actually stuck around to see her box so don’t believe she can throw an actual punch because they can’t take that seriously, because she’s just a pretty little celebrity what can she actually do, but then one day end up in an argument with her and challenge her to a sparring match and to their surprise kicks their ass and they become sparring partners. I don’t know, clearly I haven’t given that plot much thought.

Step-family member: Eevee doesn’t have a relationship with her mom, but she is aware the woman got married to another woman who has kids when Eevee was 19 or so. She’s never met any of them. Never spoken to any of them. Never been invited to family functions. Knows full well they exist and they know full well she exists and they have actually hung out with other members of her family, just not her. So that sounds like awkward and traumatic fun for all involved right?? Bring the angst.

Fellow Actors: They could be real friends, could be fake friends, could have worked together, could just know of each other, could be a publicity friendship, dude, I don’t know.

Fans / Haters: like her work or don’t like her work???????????? I don’t know I’m just throwing stuff out there at this point.

I don’t know we’ll figure something out, I AM PUMPED AND EXCITED!!

[theolddarkmachine]

baby, it’s cold inside

“Voltron Heating & AC, what can we do for you?” A smoke filled voice answers. There’s a pleasant rasp to it that reminds Shiro of a crackling fire.

“I need help,” he says, mentally kicking himself before he’s even finished speaking when he realizes how stupid he must sound. There’s a pause, filled only with a quiet huffing sound that he’s certain is the technician swallowing a laugh.

“What’s your name?” The man asks, key clicks providing a quiet backdrop for his question.

“Shiro,” he answers quickly, biting his tongue when he thinks that the man is probably looking for a full name.

“Takashi Shirogane,” he rectifies, noting the pause in the typing as he speaks. “My friends call me Shiro.”

Because that’s helpful, he thinks to himself, sharpening his glare at his heater. This is all your fault.

“Alright, Shiro,” the man says, and Shiro wonders if he’s imagining the way his name sounds like silk the way it’s wrapped in his voice. “How can I help you?”

Tags: Christmas Meet Cute, Fluff, Duel Flustered Disasters

AO3

A/N: It’s the holidays, and ya know what, we deserve some fluff. Shoutout to @smartcookie727 who saved me from just naming this Pilot Light XD also let’s pretend that this sounds like i know anything about heaters

************************

It’s Christmas day, and Keith is cold.

Really fucking cold.

Which is just cosmically hilarious given he’s a heating repairman working in a shop without heating. Keith is certain he’d laugh about it if his teeth weren’t chattering violently enough to chip them.

“You should go home, Pidge. Go hang out with your family,” he says through the click, praying he doesn’t catch his tongue between them.

“And leave my favorite Grinch alone on this sacred day?” Pidge says, popping her gum for dramatic effect as she flashes her bright stare up over the top of her computer. “Never.”

“I’m not a Grinch,” Keith replies, almost defiantly as he pulls a foot up into his seat and tucks his knee against his chest.

He really isn’t. It’s a common misconception that he doesn’t like Christmas. He likes it well enough.

In fact, he finds a sort of solace in it. The holidays slowed the town down, and allowed him to breathe.

They were just quiet, and always had been.

For him, at least.

I can take this Christmas off, honey, his mother had offered the week prior, as she always did.

No, the station can’t function without you, Keith had laughed, waving her off, as he always did.

Fires didn’t take holidays, and as the captain of the Garrison Fire Department, Krolia knew that better than anyone. They were used to it by now, and always celebrated their Christmas the night before. It was tradition by now, just like Pidge and her show of holiday solidarity.

And if that wasn’t enough, it also meant he got to make a monopoly on any heating disasters that might come up while everyone else was off.

Of course, it’s a decision he’s deeply regretting this Christmas with it’s record lows. He really needed to speak with whoever decided the cheaper warehouse price was worth the lack of heating.

“You have no one to blame but yourself, you know,” Pidge hums, breaking through his train of thought as she continues to click away at her keyboard. He isn’t sure if she means his reputation or the frostbite he’s certain is turning his toes black, but he elects to ignore her since he doesn’t really have an argument either way.

Solidarity be damned, he thinks as he breathes a hot puff of air between his palms. Pidge is Jewish anyways.

Quiet settles over the room, only disrupted by Pidge’s quick keystrokes and the ivory click of his teeth for what seems like an eternity before the phone rings.

Sharp and shrill, it makes him jump, the sudden motion of it shoving his shin into his desk hard enough to make him yipe.

This had been their fifth Christmas with the business, and the first time anyone had actually called during it.

“Are you going to answer that?” Pidge asks, tone curious as she flicks her look between him and the phone that’s still ringing at the edge of his desk as if he needs help finding where the sound is coming from.

Which, is valid given the way he’s gaping over to her, but she didn’t need to know that.

Nodding curtly, Keith reaches for it, pressing the answer button before he has it halfway to his ear as he rubs at his throbbing shin.

“Voltron Heating & AC,” he says, trying his best to not chop up his words through his chatter, “what can we do for you?”

***

It’s Christmas day, and Shiro is cold.

Really fucking cold.

He’d known he had bad luck, what with the career ending accident and the semi-newness of singledom that had left a little dark rain cloud over his holidays, but he hadn’t thought he’d be so unlucky for his heat to crap out on him on Christmas.

Ho ho freaking ho, he thinks bitterly as he stares at his lifeless heating system. The large metal rectangle didn’t even have enough in it to give one last death rattle as it just sat silently before him.

It looks more like a gravestone than a heater.

To make matters worse, Shiro doesn’t even know where to start with the damn thing to try and fix it himself.

He knew all the intricacies of various space crafts, and yet in the face of a heating system, he was rendered useless. Which, honestly just felt like the cherry on top of the shit sundae that had been his year.

Typical.

Heaving a sigh, Shiro kicks halfheartedly at the heating system before pulling his phone from his front pocket.

Pulling up Google, he searches ‘heating repair open christmas day,’ accepting Google’s oh so helpful suggestion of tacking on ‘near me’ at the end before pressing enter. There seems to be a momentary pause that’s just long enough for Shiro to imagine the search engine returning his inquiry with a big middle finger before it brings up a list of all the HVAC technicians in the area.

All in which have CLOSED plastered right beside their names in bold.

All, except one.

Boasting five stars from enough reviewers to make the rating seem legit, Shiro clicks the number beneath the name, not bothering to check their website for pricing.

Desperate times called for desperate measures and he was willing to pay what he needed to to regain feeling in his toes.

“Voltron Heating & AC, what can we do for you?” A smoke filled voice answers. There’s a pleasant rasp to it that reminds Shiro of a crackling fire.

“I need help,” he says, mentally kicking himself before he’s even finished speaking when he realizes how stupid he must sound. There’s a pause, filled only with a quiet huffing sound that he’s certain is the technician swallowing a laugh.

“What’s your name?” The man asks, key clicks providing a quiet backdrop for his question.

“Shiro,” he answers quickly, biting his tongue when he thinks that the man is probably looking for a full name.

“Takashi Shirogane,” he rectifies, noting the pause in the typing as he speaks. “My friends call me Shiro.”

Because that’s helpful, he thinks to himself, sharpening his glare at his heater. This is all your fault.

“Alright, Shiro,” the man says, and Shiro wonders if he’s imagining the way his name sounds like silk the way it’s wrapped in his voice. “How can I help you?”

***

Standing in front of the crimson door, Keith thinks he knows what to expect.

While their town isn’t necessarily small, it is small enough for him to know about the the newcomer that had moved there in the past month.

He’s a veteran, so they say, fresh out of rehab from an accident and taking up a position at Allura’s family practice. Kind, even though life has given him enough reason not to be, Takashi Shirogane— My friends call me Shiro— unwittingly became the talk of the town.

Well, the talk of the housewives who had happened by the clinic since he’d started there.

It gave him a certain allure, one that’s left Keith’s heart racing as he raps his knuckles against the door.

He’s also supposed to be very handsome, he thinks as he hears the shuffle of footsteps on the other side.

So they say.

With that in mind, he thinks he knows what to expect up until the exact moment that the door swings open.

Shiro’s eyes catch the sunlight, sparking like a sterling flare, as his lips part around a welcoming smile. He’s younger than he’d been led to believe from the whispers of his achievements and white hair.

“Hey, Keith?” He asks, or at least, Keith thinks he asks. Caught tracking the strong straight of his jaw, it’s honestly lost on him.

Handsome, as it turned out, was an understatement.

“Hi,” Keith manages, shifting his gaze over the soft grey hoodie that is pulled taut across Shiro’s chest. Moving further still, he notes the way it’s tied just above where the elbow of his right arm should be.

“Hi,” he says again, snapping his attention back up to his face. “I’m Keith. From Voltron.”

It earns him a laugh, boastful and saccharine as Shiro leans against the doorframe and pushes his hand into the pocket of his sweats.

A stronger man might have been able to stop his gaze from watching the movement or letting his eyes linger on the comfortable black fabric.

Apparently, Keith is not a stronger man.

“I worked that out,” Shiro says around a smile.

Ever the eloquent type, Keith nods and offers a small, “right.”

Quiet, thick with warm anticipation drags a shiver down his spine that’s altogether different from the one brought on by the angry winter wind that’s been nipping at his skin. It’s weighted with the heavy metal of Shiro’s stare as he keeps it trained on him, as if expecting something more from him.

Which, right.

“So, where’s this heating unit?” Keith asks quickly, unhelpfully holding up his tool box as if there was anymore doubt as to why he was there.

Shifting slightly against the doorframe, Shiro cocks his head back towards his entryway.

“This way,” he says as he stands at his full height and turns toward the innards of his home.

Ignoring the heated twist in his gut that greedily curls around the knowledge that Shiro is a full head taller than him, Keith follows, letting the door shut quietly behind him.

It leads to an open living space, sparse and almost utilitarian with its couch, coffee table and TV set over the fireplace. The only excess comes in the form of three photos standing proud on the mantle. One, in a rich wood frame that features Shiro and a white haired woman that looks a lot like Allura from this distance, in black graduation caps.

Another boasts a group of men, dressed in uniform and posing in front of a jet.

The last, is older, and faded. Set in a golden frame, it stands out from the rest of the room if only because it has the presence of something sacred. In it, is a smiling child, held in the arms of what Keith can only assume is his grandfather.

“It’s just in here,” Shiro calls from ahead in the kitchen, the sound of his voice joined by the creak of another door opening.

Making his way through the kitchen, Keith follows Shiro out into the garage, his eyes zeroing in on the heating system that’s tucked in the corner.

It’s old.

Very, very old.

And covered in enough dust that he’s surprised Shiro hasn’t already started to display signs of black lung.

But most importantly, it’s really fucking old.

The silent assessment must play across his face, because as he’s searching his mental catalogue of heaters for the last time this style had even been made, he hears Shiro make a small, pained sound.

“That’s not a good look,” he says lowly, voice sounding dismayed. Keith shakes his head as he keeps his gaze on the silent metallic box.

“No, it’s okay.”

It’s a lie. From the looks of it, the unit is at least ten years past its replacement date. He honestly can’t even fathom how it’s made it this far, or at the very least, not set the place on fire.

“I should have known the price of this place was too good for there to not be some major fixes needed,” Shiro soliloquizes with a sigh as Keith kneels down, pulling his favorite screwdriver from his back pocket. Making quick work of the siding, it falls away with a sharp clang and a huff of dust to reveal—

Even more dust.

A small wheeze escapes him as he inhales some.

“It’s bad,” Shiro surmises from the sound, voice straining further as Keith pushes back on his haunches and shakes his head. Both at Shiro’s words, but also to clear it of dust.

“It’s not too bad,” he croaks, looking up over his shoulder and offering as much of a smile as he can with his lungs heaving and eyes watering.

“I can fix this.”

It’s another lie. He isn’t actually sure it’s fixable, but he can’t bring himself to say it. Not when Shiro is looking at him with that desperate shine in his eyes, and that jaw set by the gods themselves.

Sighing with relief, he watches as Shiro visibly deflates, his worried look softening into a mix of sheepish and thankful.

Given the circumstance, Keith is certain the first comparison his mind draws for the man shouldn’t be warmth, and yet it does as he watches him nod slowly.  

“Okay,” Shiro says finally. “I’ll leave it to you, then.”

Then, he smiles. A true smile that reaches his eyes and hits Keith with all the force of an 18-wheeler. It smashes his sternum and stops his heart for long enough that he has the time to worry it won’t start again before it kicks back to life in triple time.

“Yeah, leave it to me,” Keith sputters, mouth moving without the help of his still rebooting brain.

Which, is when tragedy strikes.

“I’ll get you warm.”

It’s not what he means to say. Is never what he would mean to say. Yet, he says it anyway.

Silence falls like heavy lead around them as red floods Shiro’s cheeks. Eyes widening, Keith opens his mouth then closes it again with a click, deciding instead to turn back to the heating unit.

Staring into the thick blanket of dust, he wonders for just a moment if he could possibly suffocate himself in it before he starts to get to work.

***

He isn’t checking Keith out.

That feels like a breach in some kind of unsigned contract between him and the white knight of a heating technician that had showed up at his doorstep hours ago.

So no, Shiro isn’t checking him out as he’s on his hands and knees, half shoved into the depths of his apparently unending heating unit.

What he’s doing, is appreciating him.

Appreciating him and his lean form, with his very capable hands and sense of dry humor that played perfectly against his own.

Even after he’d worn out small talk a little over an hour in, Shiro still found himself comfortable as he sat there filling the role of silent moral support.

Shiro would even argue that he was making himself useful, after the second hour when he’d picked up on the small grunt that Keith would make before extricating himself from the bowels of the unit to switch out tools. So now, he’s also filling the role of pseudo assistant.

One who is definitely not checking him out.

He repeats it like a mantra as Keith wiggles his hips, apparently having a tough time with whatever it is in there that he’s been wrestling with.

Soft sounds escape the heating unit as he continues to struggle with the innards of it, moving this way and that, unaware of the pink flush that is sweeping over Shiro’s skin. It makes him run hot in a way that makes him wonder if the heater was already back up and running.

When he’d opened the door, he hadn’t expected to find himself pinned beneath the weight of a stare painted the most intriguing mix of jeweled purple and steely blue. At most, he’d expected the usual, stock variety of heating technicians.

A little bit older, a little bit bigger, and with a little more facial hair.

Instead, Keith turned out to be the human incarnate of a firestorm. With a voice like smoke, and presence that had him filled with an aching burn, Keith seemed to be something other that couldn’t be contained.

Lost deep in the trenches of his thoughts, Shiro misses the Keith slowly pulls back out of the unit and begins reattaching the panel he’d removed. It isn’t until he hears the sharp sound of a palm against metal that he focuses back on the technician, who is looking up at him with a smile as the soft purr of life rolls through the heater.

For one, longstanding moment, Shiro wonders if it’d be too cheesy to consider this a Christmas miracle.

“I told you I could fix it,” Keith says, relief making his smile soft as he uses a hand to push himself up onto his feet before brushing off his knees.

With his hair disheveled, and a dark streak of dust that bridges his nose, he looks like he just returned from battle.

Beautiful, a stray thought says, sending his heart ricocheting through his chest and up into his throat.

“You did,” he replies, far softer than he’d intended and he feels the ever present flush deepen beneath his scar. The comfortable silence falls once more as Keith

“So,” he continues, scratching at the back of his neck as he laughs sheepishly, “what’s the damage?”

It’s a simple enough question. A joke, even, as Keith regards him closely. His look is thoughtful, like he’s searching for something as he cocks his head.

And then he smiles.

The arch of it is a curved blade that sinks deep into his chest as Keith finally looks away and starts to rummage through his toolbox, pulling out a receipt book just moments later.

“How about a hundred bucks?” He asks, flipping through the pages in search of an unused one. Making a small sound of triumph, he pulls a pen from his pocket and pulls the cap off with his teeth.

Shiro tries not to focus too hard on the way the blue cap presses against the full of his bottom lip.

He must fail, because then Keith looks up with a questioning brow pulled high at the strangled sound that apparently comes from deep in his own throat.

“Are you sure that’s all you want?” Shiro can’t help but ask. It’s an obscenely low price, he doesn’t need to know anything about heaters to know that, and he can’t quite wrap his mind around it. Mouth caught open, he watches as Keith just nods and starts writing on the pad, shifting the pen cap to the side.

This, Shiro thinks, is also obscene but for a whole other reason.

“Really?” It comes out choked as he reaches for the wallet in his pocket, pulling it open and eyeing the credit cards he no longer needs to ensure he can pay.

The weight of expectation sits on his shoulders as he pulls his debit card free from its pocket, waiting for the other shoe to drop.

It never does, as Keith just shrugs and holds out a hand, eyes still trained downward on the receipt book. Gently, Shiro presses the card to his waiting palm. Lightning buzzes in his fingertips where they brush against Keith’s skin. The feeling pulls a small, shuddering sound from his lips that pulls Keith’s strange grey amethyst gaze up to look at him as he pulls his hand quickly back.

The buzzing feeling remains as he flexes his hand, opening and closing it to see if it would fade.

It doesn’t.

Turning his attention back down, Keith places the card beneath the carbon paper and rubs the side of his pen against it, pressing the numbers into the yellow page. The sudden tear of the paper makes Shiro jump, its sound hanging in the air as Keith folds his copy around the card and hands it back to him.

His smile, seems to grow wider, and cuts deeper.

Shiro wonders if Keith knows just how close to his heart it’s cutting.

“Merry Christmas, Shiro,” he says smoothly as Shiro takes it.

“Yeah, you too.” Shiro wants to kick himself immediately for the stuttering breathlessness of his own voice.

Get it together, Shirogane, he chides silently as Keith dips his head and grabs his toolbox. Heat is already starting to spread through him as he tries to find anything else to say, though he isn’t even sure what he could say.

Want to stay for dinner, maybe?

Want to stay forever, a very unhelpful voice supplies.

It isn’t until he’s decided on maybe thanks, that he realizes Keith has already seen himself out. The sound of his front door clicking shut rocks down his spine, landing at the base of his stomach in the form of heavy disappointment.

Beside him, his heater continues to purr, and it almost sounds like a hissing laugh.

“Shut up,” he whispers as he unfolds the receipt, grabbing his card and immediately dropping it as if its shocked him.

It hasn’t, but the handwriting beneath it had.

Swallowing down the thrumming heart in his throat, Shiro rereads it.

It’s ten digits, and a whole name.

Keith Kogane, his Christmas miracle, had left his number.

***

“A hundred dollars, Keith,” Pidge mutters under her breath for the thousandth time as she presses her forehead down into her palms. “A hundred dollars.”

Admittedly, Keith knows that it’s a low price.

Even triple that would have been an obscenely low price for the miracle he had managed. There was no reason for the fix to work, and even now, near two hours after the fact, he still isn’t quite sure how he’d done it. Nor, was he planning on questioning it.

It’s a Christmas miracle, a small voice cooed at the back of his mind as he just shrugs at Pidge yet again.

On any other day, he’d try to explain himself.

Of course, on any other day, he wouldn’t charge a customer a tenth of the price for a fix. More importantly, he wouldn’t leave his phone number either.

God, he’d left his number.

Dropping his head down on his desk with a soft thunk!, he tries to pinpoint the exact moment his life had devolved into a Hallmark Christmas movie.

As if he could actually pass as some protagonist. Or love interest.

Groaning into the fake wood grain, Keith rubbed his forehead against its cool surface.

Was he the love interest?

“A hundred dollars, Keith,” Pidge moans again in reply.

A hundred dollars, and a phone number, he silently bites back.

Falling into a shared silence, the room goes almost painfully quiet as Keith considers the many ways he could possibly explain away the temporary lapse in his own judgement.

Maybe he could blame the amount of dust he’d inhaled, claiming momentary insanity. Maybe he could claim it was nothing more than a friendly offer for Shiro to reach out to him when his heater inevitably bit it again. Or maybe, he could blame it on a deranged twin.

Yorak, Keith thinks with a mental nod when he feels the sudden buzz of a text alert skitter across his desktop and against his forehead. It freezes him, stalling his breath as his eyes fly open to be filled with the light brown of the fake wood.

Rolling his head to the side, he presses his cheek flush to the desk as he eyes his phone. At this angle, all he can see is the light of his screen as it stays lit with its message.

It’s a coincidence, he’s sure, as he continues to hold his breath and lifts a hesitant hand toward the offending piece of technology that has lodges his heart in his throat. Just a coincidence.

With a gentle press of his fingers, Keith flips the phone onto his side, his eyes widening at the bold, unsaved number, and the single line of text that accompanies it.

How about coffee sometime?

And then, it buzzes against his palm as another joins it.

It’s Shiro btw.

The obviousness of it startles a snorting sound from him as he sits up.

yeah i kinda figured

Keith breathes, the air expanding his chest and grounding him as he continues to type, letting his fingers press the words into the screen before his mind can catch up.

coffee would be great

Cutting his gaze up from the screen, he finds Pidge still at her desk with her head in her hands. By the way her shoulders move, he wonders quietly if she’s fallen asleep as he waits for a reply.

Several minutes pass before it comes in the form of a tickling vibration in his palm.

How about today?

He must make a sound, because out of the corner of his eye, he sees the bounce of her tawny hair as she flicks her head upward. Worst of all, he can feel her stare cutting into him as he taps out his response.

something tells me it might be tough finding a place open today

Shiro’s next text comes in, almost instantaneous.

You could always come back to mine. I make a mean latte :)

Forty-seven seconds pass before Keith gets the next text. He knows, because he counts them in some vague attempt to slow the rapid fire stutter of his heart as he tries to come up with what to say.

Too forward. Ignore that.

Keith has only known Shiro for the three and a half hours that it took to fix his heater, but he can already imagine the pink that is probably spilling across his cheeks as he rubs a palm against the back of his neck. It makes him laugh. A real laugh that makes Pidge’s stare burn hotter against his skin.

no i think id like that

He sends the message, all too aware of the way his lips are stuck in an upward curl when Pidge clears her throat pointedly. Looking up, he catches the way her gaze shifts between the phone and his face, and the way her mouth opens around a comment.

Keith beats her to it.

“Pidge?” He says, smile growing wider as the phone buzzes in his hand again.

“Yes?” She replies, curiosity and confusion filling the word as she looks down at the phone again.

Excitement flutters through him as the buzz tickles his palm once more.

“Let’s close up for Christmas.”

*************************

[cannibalisticshadows]

Doughnuts (A Dear Evil Heaven One-Shot)

Ao3 | FF

Fandom: Megamind

Pair: Megamind/Roxanne

Summary: During this time of year, Megamind always gets a little sad. Roxanne tries to fix that.

It’s the start of December, he notes with disdain, and festivities are running rampant in the streets, colorful lights hanging on houses, sugary food in abundance, calls for charity, the increased “family time”.

It makes his stomach sick.

And so, having barricaded himself in a dark state of mind in his own room, he completely shut out the world entirely. Not even the brainbots were allowed to disturb him.

It ended after a few days when Minion burst through the door and demanded he get out. Why, though, he wondered grimly. He always goes into a hibernation of sorts during this time of year.

“Ms. Ritchi has been calling non-stop,” he said angrily, not at his girlfriend, at him, mind you, “She just called me earlier saying if you came over tonight she’d give you a surprise.”

“Oh, goodie,” he mumbled, running a hand over his stubble. He hadn’t shaved in a while. Instantly he thought of the typical “Christmas Spirit” spiel, but knew Roxanne didn’t celebrate that holiday—though it was also secular, not religious, right? Either way the festive concept gave him seasonal depression.

“Just go, please,” Minion begged. “She’s worried about you, Sir. The only reason, Ms. Ritchi says, that she hasn't come over again to—“

“She came over?”

“Thrice this week! You wouldn’t see her, remember!? The only reason she hasn’t tried to see you today or yesterday is because she’s getting ready for some kind of party.”

He glared.

“No.”

“Yes. Go. Please, Sir. I’d like to go to a holiday cooking class this evening, and I don’t feel comfortable leaving you here alone.”

He groaned. “Minion, that happened one time in my childhood.”

“I’m still not taking that chance.”

This went on for ten minutes before Minion, taking matters into his own fins, ordered a pair of bots to take him by the arms and quite literally drag him to Roxanne’s.

Flailing, cursing, and overall hating life, he found himself being thrown on his girlfriend’s balcony in a undignified thud.

The first thing he notices, after pulling himself off the ground (besides being suddenly, painfully aware of his state of dress [loose sweat pants and a tight short-sleeved band top {yes, he wears normal clothes, like a normal person, every once in a while}]), was the smell of confection foods, chocolate, sugar, and—overall baked goods. Secondly, he noticed the starring woman, who was passionate about eating healthy things and banning anything with so much as a gram of sugar, baking these things.

Had he died and gone to heaven?

He must have been standing there for a while, staring at this wee woman who was bustling about in her kitchen, frying balls of dough, it seemed, with the countertops covered in baked goods, because she suddenly froze and turned around, and met his eyes through the glass.

She dropped a pair of tongs and came running over, throwing the glass door open.

“Roxa—ooof!” Her arms were thrown around his abnormally long neck, her face pressed against the side of his head.

“Oh my god, Megamind,” she gasped, then pulled away to look at him. Her hands grasped his shoulders.

“Hi—“ he grasped as she smacked him hard on the chest.

“Do you know how worried I was!?”

“I’m—“

“No, no, don’t explain yourself,” she said. “Minion told me everything. I should be the one who’s sorry. I tried to come over today, but—“

“But…”

“I—just come on in, it’s colder than ice out here. You’ll catch your death.”

Numbly, he let her pull him inside of her deliciously warm apartment. The lights were off in her living room, with the kitchen lights on. The TV was off, with the radio on to some music he immediately recognized as Hebrew, and near the balcony window, which he’s now noticing, is a—

“Is that your—me-nora?”

“Menorah. Yeah.”

It wasn’t terribly eccentric; small and neat, about half a foot tall, with four straight silver-plated branches on either side of one tall branch in the middle. Atop these branches were tiny glass cups. The middle one and three to the right had a bud of a wick, sitting in what seemed to be oil, burned brightly.

“Why aren’t the others lit?”

“It’s the third night,” Roxanne suddenly said, almost awkwardly.

He then remembered this. One new candle each night.

He had missed the other nights with her.

It made him feel--it didn't make him feel very good. Actually, it made him feel like a complete bastard.

“Aah.”

“Come,” she pulled on his hand. “Have a doughnut.”

“I—I’m sorry, but who are you and what have you done to my Roxanne?” He laughed humorlessly because in all seriousness he wasn’t kidding. Roxanne always nagged him when he ate sweets. ”You don’t eat enough as it is! Why put this junk in your body?” Most of the time, anyway. What she didn’t know didn’t kill her, after all. But yet, here she was, offering him—doughnuts. Doughnuts.Which she made.

“Here,” she said, ignoring his statement. She thrust a warm round doughnut into his hands, half wrapped in a napkin, overflowing with powder sugar and leaking red jelly. “Try it.”

“Is this a trap?”

“Eat it.”

He took a bite.

It was scrumptious.

“Okay. Seriously. Who are you?” He asked her through a mouthful of her sweet confection.

“It’s tradition,” she said matter-of-factly.

“Okay,” he said, understanding. “So, why all this…” he gestured to the dozens of treats around them. Not that he was complaining. If this was his “surprise”, well, he was certainly pleasantly surprised. He was already close to finished this superb doughnut. But, even this seemed a little over doing it.

Roxanne threw her head back and groaned, wiping her powdery hands on her flower-printed apron. “So, my co-workers know I’m Jewish now, and asked our new boss, Robbie, if they could do something Hanukkah-themed this season. Somehow it turned into me baking for everyone.”

“Mhmm,” he commented wordlessly, biting into his second doughnut.

“It’s tomorrow,” she stressed, picking up her tongs to place another ball of dough in a popping pan of crumbly oil. “And I just found out from Lucy down in Sports that a group of the managers and their secretaries are coming for this holiday party, and three of them are Jewish, too, so—now I have like fifteen more people to cater too. Do you understand? I’ve been on my feet for hours.”

He was about to answer with an offer of assistance, but she cut him off before he could get out a single syllable. “No, no, don’t listen to my problems. This is about you.” She turned to him. “I came over Monday, but Minion said you were still squirreled away in your room. Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

She pursed her lips. “Okay. It’s just—Megamind, you know—“

He tilted his head.

“I love you. I love you very much.”

He licked his lips, feeling his tongue go heavy in his mouth, and his apitite forgotten. “Roxanne…”

“Shh, don’t say anything,” she said in a low voice as if this was some big secret he has vowed to keep. She became very close, all of a sudden, and she placed her little hand on his chest. He forgot how she was near his size, despite her being more—curvy, in areas. Which he very much enjoyed. It distracted him, with her like this. Her hair had grown a bit since last year when they first began this relationship. She had sweated in here (it was hot, actually, in her kitchen), and stings of hair clung to her flushed face. A smudge of powdered sugar stuck to her cheek, and she smelled like a bakery. Her apron hugged her waist like a second skin. Plus it made her chest and derrière look amazing. Megamind didn’t know where to look. He licked his lips again, wondering how he should handle this situation.

She suddenly leaned over and kissed him. It sparked against his skin, his nerves, sending a million signals to his brain. It felt like he was on fire, yet completely flat lining at the same time. This woman!

“I was thinking the other day,” she said critically once she pulled away from the rather chaste mouth-to-mouth, turning around to turn the doughnut over in the oil. “I don’t really give you enough attention.”

This brought him to the right state of mind immediately. “What? Of course you do!”

“No, I mean—This past year, it’s felt like—the spotlight’s been on me? Sort of? And I—I well, I wanted to do something for you.”

He wasn’t sure what she was talking about; until he began to withdraw from the world in general at the start of winter, they spent most of their time together. Enough so that he actually—he feels unnecessarily giddy—met her parents (again), and her brother, and that was—an interesting experience. Either way they were joined at the joint (is that how people say it?)? What was all of this, then?

He wiped his powdery blue hands down the front of his shirt, having finished his third treat.

Suddenly, Roxanne reached behind her and untied her apron. He stood there, confused and feeling, absurdly, oddly excited at her undressing. They’re usually very innocent in all their physical trysts, but—she’s dropping the apron to the floor, and she’s—and—she’s wearing a white short-sleeved blouse, with a little oil stain on the turned-up collar, and sugar sprinkles, a jelly smudge, and—and she’s beautiful, he realizes in his rattled, dead brain, standing there like the sacrificial lamb. A blue knee-ledge skirt, too, but—

She’s taking his hand and placing it on her left breast.

!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?

“Not tonight, Megamind, but soon.”

“Soon…”

“Yes. Soon.”

He gulped.

“I—“

In the back of his alien brain, he knew she was trying to tell him something, because her hand was over his, which was over her clothed breast, but there was some annoying Christmas music playing in the distance. It wasn’t coming from Roxanne’s radio, that was playing very soft instrumental Jewish music, but from somewhere in the building. His ears were stronger than Roxanne’s, so—

It must have gotten louder, enough for her to hear because she’s perking up, and—

“Oh, shit,” his girlfriend curses, pulling away from him. “I told them not to come until eight!”

His internal clock made him say, “It’s eight fifteen.”

“Oh no!” She whipped around and grabbed her tongs, pulling the doughnuts out of the boiling oil and onto a plate covered in several paper towel strips. “Megamind! Quick, put most of these in the boxes,” she motioned toward a stack of doughnut boxes on her breakfast bar. “Hurry!”

Momentarily panicking, because, really, he had no idea what was happening, Megamind just went with it and starting packing doughnuts like it was life or death. Whatever made Roxanne happy!

The music was getting closer, and now he could tell it wasn’t just any Christmas music, but blasting notes of “Santa Clause is Coming to Town,” at the same time as “Hanukkah Oh Hanukkah,” turning up on what must of been the highest volume. To him, it hurt his ears. As it became louder and louder, he heard the familiar sounds of teenagers and children, stomping down the hallway of Roxanne’s floor.

“They’re here,” Roxanne cried, rapidly trying to stuff the doughnuts into the boxes, as if this band of holiday horrors coming their way would burn them alive if they saw these treats on the premises.

“Who’s here?!”

Before she could answer, the door was banged up on a pair of several fists. “MISS RITCHIIII,” yelled a young man. “SANTA IS HEEERRREEE.”

“Shit,” she said, wiping her hands on a towel. After packing the last doughnut, she took the boxes and put them into the cabinet, stacking them neatly on the floor. “Whatever you do, make sure they don’t see these. They’re for work.”

“O-kay…”

She got up and ran to her currently-being-abused door. When she threw it open, he scowled.

“Mickey, what the hell are you doing here?” He demanded, sliding up next to Roxanne. In the doorway stood a gang of loud, obnoxious young people, varying in age and skin tones. Mickey, the leader of sorts of this group, was a tall African boy from Kenya. Michael Otieno had moved to America as a young child, and having been orphaned shortly after arrival, and speaking not a lick of English at the time, he was completely lost and alone. It was not surprising Megamind saw a kindred spirit in that, and temporarily kept him under his wing for a while until he placed him in a group home that he will never, ever admit to founding. Now, Mickey was nineteen and a complete pain in his ass.

“I’m the black Santa Clause,” he shouted, storming in with the rest of his gang—all of whom he knew. All of them were bobbing and dancing to a mix of holiday music, wearing the most hideous sweaters he had ever seen. “And it’s bloody Christmas time. Hohoho, bitches!” He wore a big red suit and white beard, caring a big burlap sack with dubious objects inside.

“Happy Holidays, Mr. Megamind, Ms. Ritchi!” A girl in an equally ugly Hanukkah sweater, swearing flashing blue sunglasses and little dreidel earrings, greeted and hugged his girlfriend. He knew her as Rebecca Heys. She was an orphan too, plucked out of an abusive foster home when she was eleven. That was five years ago. “Are we too late?”

Beside Rebecca was a young couple, Missy and Paula, who he more or less, accidentally, put together, when he learned Missy (at the time, she’d had near-crippling depression) had the same interests as Paula. So he introduced the two and hoped it worked out. Wasn’t that how friends were made? And friends—help each other? He came back a week later to accidentally walk in on them making out. Paula rubs her hands together and says, “If we’re late, we’re fashionably late.”

“Yes, you’re right on time,” Roxanne laughed, clasping her hands. The gang of teenagers clobbered together as they began to set up—a party? He sneered as they pulled out cookies and sweets, confetti and even louder music. Mickey gave him a rather tight bear hug, which he made a great feat as to not respond. They all smelled like coffee and cocoa.

“We’re here to show you guys the time of your fricken’ lives,” Fox, a lanky ginger-haired teen said, dropping a bowl of popcorn on the counter. “And damn does it smell like the Pillsbury doughboy's asshole in here.”

“Oh my god it totally does,” William, an African-American fourteen-year-old said. He was wearing a Kwanzaa sweater.

“And it’s so fucking warm in here!” Mickey commented.

“It’s colder than my mom’s tits outside,” Freddy, another kid from the group home pipped up, slamming a jar of what seemed to be egg-nog on the table.

“Language,” Roxanne reminded. “And that better be alcohol-free!” She said, directing the boys and girls to the dining room. “Megamind,” she said to him, voice raised to be heard over the chaos, yet quiet enough for him to only hear. “This is for you.”

“What? Why? You know how I feel about this stuff.”

“It’s not about that,” she said, shaking her head, “You’ve been inside for ten days.”

“It hasn’t been that long.”

“Yes it has,” she crossed her arms. “I’m reminding you that people love you. And for the rest of this month, I want to find you here. With me.”

He pursed his lips.

“Okay. Fine. I’ll play.”

“Hohoho,” Mickey said again stomping up to him with his big sack. He dropped it at his feet. Megamind stared at it as if poisonous snakes would slither out.

“They're presents!” Missy said, giving him a hug. “From all of us!” All of them gathered to see his reaction. Instantly, he felt on edge.

“Uh—“ he didn’t really know how to respond. Presents? For him?

“Who’s hungry?” Roxanne interrupted him before he could make a bigger idiot of himself. She came up behind him with a big tray of fruits and candies. Where did that come from?

“Food!” Someone shouted, as a couple of them came storming over.

“Hey, it’s okay,” she whispered to him. “I’ve got your back. Now, make sure they don’t find the—“

“FFFFFFUCKING DOUGHNUTS,” someone yelled, and the loud whoop from the whole gang sounded, followed by them all grabbing a dozen of the confections from her cabinet.

“Crap.”

~.~.~.~

Three hours later, over half of his “children”, as they all called themselves, left Roxanne’s apartment. Luckily they all were good enough to clean up after themselves, and not much was needed to be done once the party was over. Rebecca was with Roxanne near her menorah, and the older of the two women was directing the younger in the lightning. Now two menorahs burned brightly in the window. Rebecca’s cat menorah had wax candles, whereas Roxanne’s was oil. Beside them were Paula and Missy, who sipped on some fruity tea Roxanne gave out.

“It’s nice, you know,” Mickey said, sitting beside him on the couch, watching the women. “The Holidays.”

“I suppose,” he answered, tired. The festivity had been nice. And to be honest, he’d choked down three more doughnuts, much to Roxanne’s distress. At Megamind feet was the sack of presents—some bought, others handmade, and at least a dozen cards with holiday sentiments in his (sometimes with Roxanne as well) honor. He didn’t know how to process all of this, but the kids got excited when he examined each item. He particularly liked the miniature figure of himself. Very handsome. That was made by Rebecca.

“Hey man,” his couch-companion said, making him turn away from his girlfriend to the boy beside him. “I know you hate this time of year.”

“Oh?”

“You never do anything for the holidays. Not even before.”

“Before?”

“Ya know,” Missy suddenly said, appearing before them. Her arm was thrown around Paula’s neck, smiling cheekily. “When you were all ’I’m going to rule the world!’”

He scoffed. “I wanted Metrocity. Not the world. That’s too much trouble. And I have Metrocity!”

“Yeah, sure,” the boy laughed. “Just—I’m glad to see you, old man. It’s been a while.”

“Like, three whole weeks,” Paula said as if it was the end of the world. “We never see you anymore.”

“Hm.” Megamind wouldn’t admit it, but it was good to see them all too.

“Come over moooore,” Mickey whined like he wasn’t practically an adult.

“I’ll put it on my to-do list.”

“And treat her right,” one of the girls said, tilting her head to Roxanne. “She’s a good woman. She came up to us at the house and asked if we could come over and cheer you up.”

“I knew there was a reason I kept you children around.”

Mickey punched him in the shoulder. “See? Knew you loved us.”

Megamind smiled behind his hand.

“Oh! And nice beard by the way.”

~.~.~.~

Missy, Paula, and Mickey had finally gone home, leaving behind a sound-asleep Rebecca on the couch. He wasn’t against the idea of housing orphans (he’d cut his hand off before admitting), but he knew Rebecca was good and safe at the group home (he made sure of it). Megamind just—kind of wanted to be with Roxanne. Alone.

“She’s never really celebrated Hanukkah before,” Roxanne said, handing him an over-sized t-shirt. “This was the first time she’s lit candles.”

“Really?” she commented, pulling off his over top to pull the new one on.

“Is it—alright if I teach her a few things? I don’t think she could ask me enough questions.”

He twisted his face up in confusion. “Why would I be against it?”

“I don’t know. Yeah, that was kind of a stupid question. It’s just—you’re like these kids father. You're a daddy.” It was probably extremely perverted, but he found instant gratification when she more or less called him daddy.

“I am the daddy.”

She shot him a look, but she was smiling.

It was late. Very late. Late enough that Roxanne ordered Chinese for them and the kids, and watched a Christmas movie called How The Grinch Stole Christmas, and then a Jewish movie called The Frisco Kid, with an actor Mickey said was, “Willy Wonka”.

“And Michael’s so sweet,” she said, washing some bowels and plates in the skin. He stood by, drying them off. “You never told me you practically raised him!”

“That’s because I didn’t.”

“Pish,” she brushed it off. “That boy’s just like you. Big heart and big brain.”

“My heart is a dried up grape,” he barked evilly, chuckling when it made her laugh.

“I doubt that,” Roxanne said, putting away the last of the dishes. “If it was, would you be affected by this?”

“Wh—“

She slid up to him until her form was pressed against his. She's always so warm, and her curves so, so, so soft. Uuuuugh. He sucked in a breath, his mouth dry despite the three mugs of egg-nog he drank. “Why, Ms. Ritchi, there’s a child sleeping in the next room.”

“She’s sixteen.”

“A child.”

Roxanne sniggered and laughed against the sensitive skin of his neck. She kissed him behind his ear, hugging him tightly. He gasped again, fighting the urge to grab her rear end.

“Now… I need to make more doughnuts. They ate two dozen and a half.”

“Hmm.”

“Help me,” she asked, giving him a pouty smile. “It’ll be fun.”

“Only if I can have some.”

“Fine. One more.” She rolled her eyes and turned around, swaying her hips together, side to side, side to side, as she walked over to the cabinet. He felt a shameful amount of blood rush to his nether regions.

It was then, he noted, he wasn’t in the same state of mind he was in when he first got here.

Maybe the holidays weren’t so bad after all.

[la-knight]

Books I Read in 2016_::_The Sinister Sweetness of Splendid Academy by Nikki Loftin

“When my mom was alive, she read me stories every night.

‘Use your imagination, Lorelei,’ she’d say, ‘and your whole life can be a fairy tale.”

I wanted that to be true. But I should have paid more attention to the fairy tales.”

When Lorelei’s old school mysteriously burns down, a new one appears practically overnight: Splendid Academy. Rock-climbing walls on the playground and golden bowls of candy on every desk? Gourmet meals in the cafeteria, served by waiters? Optional homework and two recess periods a day? It’s every kids’s dream.

But Lorelei and her new friend Andrew are pretty sure it’s too good to be true. Together they uncover a sinister mystery, one with their teacher, the beautiful Ms. Morrigan, at the very center. Then Andrew disappears. Lorelei has to save him, even if that means facing a past she’d like to forget – and taking on a teacher who’s a real witch.

What Lorelei and Andrew discover chills their bones – and might even pick them clean!

1.85/5 stars

So I read this book a while ago, and the first time I read it, I really liked it. Not love, but I enjoyed it just fine. I’m not snobby about the target age of my reading material: I love Dragons Love Tacos as much as I love Red Queen as much as I love The Night Circus as much as I love Aru Shah and the End of Time. And I read The Sinister Sweetness of Splendid Academy at a dark time in my life (I have many) when my depression went undiagnosed and therefore untreated and I couldn’t handle much in the way of length or high-high stakes or grimdark or anything like that. So this book was perfect because it had stakes but it’s easier to care about one kid’s life than about, say, the war for the Iron Throne on top of all your faves possibly getting killed by ice demons or zombies. And I enjoyed this book.

More recently, I’ve reread it, and…well, I didn’t love it or like it as much as I had the first time. I didn’t hate it, but I definitely didn’t love it.

People talk about purity culture, which is hecka toxic, and I’m not here for that (I don’t judge people’s reading material unless it’s something drastic, like shouting from the rooftops how much they enjoyed Mein Kampf because, um, yikes). If there’s a book that I’ve heard is problematic, I may or may not read it for myself, depending on the nature of the issues and whatever. No media is perfect, it’s a balancing act. If I’m titchy about the person getting my money, I’ll buy that book secondhand so they don’t get any of my money (this is what I did with Stephenie Meyer, Suzanne Collins, Cassandra Clare, Anne Rice, James Dashner, & JK Rowling, for example). Not difficult to do. The obsession with consuming so-called “pure media” can be super bad and result in things like anon harassment or even death threats. I’ve seen this happen. On the flip side, the push against both problematic content and purity culture, when dealt with rationally, has led to some really great discussions regarding media analysis and critical thinking with regard to story consumption, and that’s great.

Why is this relevant?

So I reread Splendid Academy after some exposure to articles, essays, blog posts, and tumblr posts about several topics - including the pervasiveness and lethality of fat-shaming (among other things, like the silencing and condemnation by society of justified female anger). I did not go looking for these posts, they just trickled into the fringe of my social awareness as a result of using social media. I’d read them, reblogged and retweeted them, but I didn’t consciously try to apply those posts to Splendid Academy when I reread it. But this time through, the book made me super uncomfortable, although at first I didn’t quite understand why. I had to sit and, as they say, “think muh thoughts” all the way through a few times before I figured out what was bothering me.

The very basic dual premises of this book are sexist and fat-phobic. Now, I’m fat. There’s a lot of stigma around being fat. I mean, people have died of treatable, not-fat-related medical ailments because their doctor refused to look for those things, falling back on “just lose some weight and you’ll be fine” instead - and then boom, it’s something like cancer (which is not exacerbated by being fat) and the person dies.

(I am not Google. You can Google this information if you really want to. It’s all over Tumblr, Twitter, and Google. Don’t bother me about it)

The sinister nature of Splendid Academy is that its run by three witches fattening up all the kids to be eaten. Typical “Hansel and Gretel” motif, right? Except! In “Hansel and Gretel,” the kids are literally starving when they come upon a food source, an adult tells them to eat and eat and eat (it’s not their idea), and Hansel ends up locked in a cage by the witch and force-fed because the witch* threatens to kill his sister if he doesn’t. A lot of fairy tales (original ones in Grimms collections and by Andersen and whatnot, I mean) have morals of various types. The moral of “Hansel & Gretel” is not “gluttony should be punishable by death” or “being fat makes you a worthless human and it’s why bad things happen to you.”

(*By the way, the stereotypical long-nosed warty witch who eats Christian children is an anti-Semitic caricature of Jewish women and it’s gross; luckily the author doesn’t do that)

But in this book, the kids almost seem to bring their imminent demise on themselves by eating too much junk food. Sort of like how the narration says Augustus Gloop ended up turned into semi-sentient fudge in Charlie & the Chocolate Factory because he was a greedy glutton and not because Willy Wonka is a colonizing* sociopath who should never be in charge of minors.

(*Three words: Fucking. Oompa. Loompas.)

All but one of the kids attending Splendid Academy are snackers. These twelve- and thirteen-year-olds will snack on Skittles or sunflower seeds or whatever while they do homework or school work. They’re fed gourmet breakfasts and lunches in the school cafeteria every day. The food is enchanted, of course, to be highly addictive and also enchanted so that it transforms immediately into fat, apparently? Bypassing the stomach entirely, I guess, because the kids never get full and literally just eat all day every day that they’re in school.

Wait, you say. If the food is enchanted, it’s not the kids’ fault they’re eating it. That’s not fat-phobic at all. What?

I said all but one kid has fallen for these magical machinations. One boy (not our protagonist Lorelei, but her friend Andrew) is basically immune to the call of the candy. If the One Ring of Power was candy, he’d be movie!Faramir and Lorelei would be Frodo. And why is he immune? Because he’s got a fairy godmother? He’s magical himself? He’s a total nerd and studied mythology and knows how to spot ensorcelled edibles a mile away?

Nah. It’s cuz he went to fat camp.

Y’all can’t see my face right now.

Now, to be fair, apparently Andrew was a compulsive eater and needed some kind of intervention because he was out of control (which, also being fair, is a ridiculous and tired trope about how fat people can’t control themselves around food and we need to kill that with fire and not spoon-feed the idea to tweens, thanks). But even with the blegh back story of compulsive eater, YOU DON’T SEND A TWELVE-YEAR-OLD TO FAT CAMP, OHMIGAWD. Unless he’s got PICA (that mental illness where you compulsively eat dangerous or non-food shit like glass or soap or carpet lint) or whatever, he’s not compulsively eating because he’s the next Augustus Gloop and he’s a spoiled brat who hates the word “no.” I used to be a compulsive eater as a kid (which is oddly not how I got fat). I developed the habit if “eating my feelings” because I WAS SUICIDAL AND FOOD WAS THE ONLY THING THAT EVEN HELPED A LITTLE BIT.

And you know what helped me curb my compulsive eating when my depression got really bad? It wasn’t the taunting about being fat or my mom telling me I needed to go on a diet or my dad asking me constantly if I really shouldn’t put back that second cheese stick or applesauce cup. What really helped me stop compulsively eating WAS TREATING MY FREAKING DEPRESSION.

Ahem. However, the book does do one thing sort of right with this kid - because he HAS UNTREATED DEPRESSION went to actual therapy (for the compulsive eating specifically and not anything else that might be wrong) while shipped off to fat-person exile because his parents are horrible people, he can recognize “trigger foods”* - the foods that he would compulsively eat and would make him overeat when he was upset, foods he now avoids. They got that part right. But it also means he’s more selective about what he eats (which is fine) and has more self-control than the other kids (um…), self-control he learned thanks to an entire summer at fat camp (UM…), and his sheer determination alone to not “stuff his face” helps him shake off the herion-addictive magic laid on the school food.

ExCUSE me???

(*Side note, I’m on meds now for non-food stuff that screw with my appetite and also I’m a broke bitch but as a kid/teen, my trigger foods were bread, apple pie, cake, waffles, and fruit bagels. I can still, if I had money, eat an entire angel food cake but that’s not a trigger, it’s just super fluffy and delicious)

So our sidekick is a former fat kid with untreated mental health issues who got sent to fat camp and thanks to the miracle of fat camp has now overcome his unhealthy dependence on food AND has the will power (forged from denying his inner fatty) to throw off three witches’ worth of addictive magic. Something Lorelei only manages to do after she eats magical dead-kid bone chips. Because she and the other kids have no self-control and so just eat and eat...apparently.

Alrighty then…

But Andrew’s not our lead. Lorelei is. And Lorelei interesting as a middle grade protagonist. Her mom recently died of cancer and Lorelei blames herself (because that’s what kids do) and she’s filled with even more confusion, fear, self-hate, and anger than a typical tween girl as a result both of her mother’s lingering illness and ugly death as well as the fact that Lorelei at one point jerked away from her mom during an argument and, due to chemo-induced weakness, her mom lost her balance, fell, and broke a bone.

Lorelei is lost and angry. She makes friends with Andrew and finds out about the witches and their cannibal plot while still struggling not only with her mom’s death and her own guilt, but the screwed-up situation with her family. What situation? Her dad and older brother are 100% emotionally abusive and treat her like she’s some kind of bratty little monster because she’s feeling sad and guilty and scared and angry all the time.

HER MOM JUST DIED YOU BUTTHOLES, SHE’S GOING THROUGH PUBERTY WHICH IS A HORMONAL HURRICANE OF DEATH THAT RUINS EVERYTHING, AND YOU POOP-WAFFLES ARE HELPING NOT AT ALL AND YOU SUCK.

This is a MAJOR pet peeve for me because too often emotional abuse is normalized in middle grade fiction, especially when it comes from parents (this book, The Night Parade by Kathryn Tanquary, All Four Stars by Tara Dairman, Young Wizards by Diane Duane, and even in Harry Potter, perpetuated by some of the so-called heroes) and it drives me bat-crap.

This is a middle-grade review, so I’m trying to keep it PG13.

The head witch, Ms. Morrigan, is drawn to Lorelei because of her anger and how lost she feels, and instead of eating her, wants to adopt her and make her into a baby cannibal-witch. This would be kind of a cool angle except once again, it reinforces that Lorelei being angry about her mom being dead is a flaw iin her character and not a completely understandable psychological response to a tween’s universe being ripped in half by the concept of her mother being gone forever.

Her dad and brother are “good guys” and disturbed/horrified by and condemning of her anger, grief, guilt, and fear, and they punish her for it. Ergo, according to the narrative, her anger is bad. The evil witches who literally eat children admire her anger and say it proves she should be one of them, too. Ergo, her anger is double bad. She only stops being tempted to join with the witches once she realizes being angry about her mom dying is “immature” and “bad.” Ergo, blah blah blah, girls should never be angry, it’s unladylike and turns you into a flesh-eating witch.

My parents spoon-fed me “demonstrating anger in any way for any reason is bad” along with a HUGE helping of “being angry about feeling powerless makes you a bad person” for six years of my adolescence, then wondered why I started self-harming, developed depression, and attempted suicide on multiple occasions before I was twelve. The message that a child’s anger in the face of powerlessness, death, or sudden and unpredictable changes to their homeostasis is an inherently bad thing that should be punished and makes them bad or evil can be incredibly damaging. Her mom died. A twelve-year-old girl is allowed to be confused and sad and hurt and angry about that.

Like I said, I didn’t hate the book (although these two things I ranted about made me suuuper uncomfortable while reading and the more I thought about them later, the angrier I got). But I didn’t love it, and I didn’t like it as much as I did during my first read-through. The fat-shaming was annoying and gross, and I’m suuuper tired of angry girls being shamed for their feelings, especially teens and kids. Young people feel things so intensely. And they don’t always have the experience or the vocabulary to parse out how certain aspects of a story make them feel or why, or resist internalizing toxic messages about how feeling intensely or feeling a particular way at all is bad. Thre’s a big differene between asking an eight-year-old to consume their media critically and someone twice or thrice that age. And yeah, parents have a responsibility, family discussions, if they rely solely on books society has failed them, blah blah. Unfortunately, a lot of parents suck and a lot of parents shame their kids for having feelings the parets don’t think they should. Especially young girls. The normalizing of emotional abuse by parents in middle grade books proves how “normal” many adults think such things are.

Did I Enjoy This Book: yeah, for the most part, I guess. But I won’t be reading it again anytime soon.

Would I Recommend It: No, I wouldn’t. I can’t think of anyone I would feel comfortable recommending it to, who would actually enjoy it.

Plot: .35 star

Word Choice: .5 star

World Building: .5 star

Characters: .5 star

Realism: .75 star

-¼ star for fat-shaming

-¼ star for normalizing emotional abuse

-¼ star for shaming female anger

Total Score: 1.85/5 stars

________________________________________________________

Nicole Kidman as Principal Trapp Michelle Pfeiffer as Ms. Morrigan Bryce Dallas Howard as Ms. Threnoddy

[chodhound]

France day 2 part 1

Laura's having a work day with her publisher so I have booked myself in at the musee d'orsay but first breakfast.

A nice croissant and some funky jam including a rude one which was kiwi and yuzu flavour. A nice strong coffee and an omelette - appropriately fortified its time to start the day.

My tickets weren't until noon so I decided on a leisurely stroll. I wended my way via a small local park and then along a grand boulevard, the parisan's do the best boulevards, and I found myself close to the cemetery at Montparnasse. Browsing through the pillar box tombs was wonderfully peaceful, I was stuck by the Jewish tombs especially one to a victim of ausweitz, all the tombs and graves were well maintained unlike some of their equivalents in London. Do the French have a greater reverence for the past? Or is it religion or something else. And then I found the giant ceramic cat. I missed the exit and wondered further before turning off and cutting down a road filled with flower decked cafes to the bottom of the Montparnasse tower. No time to climb this monstrosity today though my ticket was ticking. Quick march to the orsay - I got predictably rather warm on the walk it was a bright sunny day - 28C.

Very quick to get in and then straight up to the 5th in lift - then it was van Gogh, Cezanne, Gaugin and pizzarro - it was reasonably quiet until the school trips arrived and then it wasn't. Time to mask up. The van Gogh's were wonderful - I saw some that I hadn't seen before. Is he overrated - maybe but theres something so alive and human about his art that just speaks to me (and everybody else). I didn't listen to music or podcasts but enjoyed the hushed voices (apart from the kids). The light at the top of the building is wonderful and an art gallery is a great place for some street photography - people are absorbed in the art or the audio tour. The cafe behind the clock was very very busy. But the second gallery was less busy - the neo-impressionist with their pointalism and the classic monet, Renoir, callebrotte and degas were wonderful - I saw some artists I had seen before but typically I can't remember them - but I took lots of photos with my big camera so I can review later at my leisure.

The cafe was busy but the main restaurant was much quieter - I was feeling dehydrated after a long walk and lots of looking so initially I only wanted a drink but then I saw they did a nice sounding cesar salad and a good brune beer as well and I thought why not. The people next to me were chatting - they were American and one said to the other that he hated 3 star restaurants because he didn't want things to look like things that they weren't and everything was just messed around too much. I wanted to tell him that not all 3 star restaurants are like that and some are very traditional but just very good - I thought it was strange not to want to go to the best possible place - although there is a time and a place for both simple and dirty food as well.

[dailyaudiobible]

09/08/2021 DAB Transcript

Isaiah 1:1-2:22, 2 Corinthians 10:1-18, Psalm 52:1-9, Proverbs 22:26-27

Today is the 8th day of September, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible. I am Brian, it is wonderful to be here with you today as we take our next step forward and I’m glad we get to take that next step forward together…together is definitely better than alone. And we’re stepping into some new territories. So, the last couple of days we’ve been reading from the Song of Songs and that is always a joy to have my wife Jill, come and join us and read that together. And so, we concluded that yesterday, so today were moving into new territory.

Introduction to the Book of Isaiah:

The book of Isaiah. And so now, we’re kind of moving into the book of prophecy. And Isaiah is considered one of the books of major…one of the major prophets or the books of major prophecy which sort of indicates that there might be minor prophets as well and there are but the major and minor prophets aren’t because of like notoriety or importance, or influence it has a lot more to do with the content. For example, some of the minor prophets, when we get there, we’ll read through those in one day, there very short in content. Whereas the book of Isaiah, we’re gonna be camping out in Isaiah for a little while now, it's 66 chapters long. So, it's one of the longer of the books in the Bible. So. the other major prophets, besides Isaiah that we’re gonna encounter will be Jeremiah, Lamentations, Ezekiel and Daniel. So, Isaiah, his name means the Lord saves and as we begin to read through Isaiah, we’ll find that he’s very passionate about what he's communicating and he's very well quoted. So, during Jesus’ ministry, as portrayed in the Gospels, Isaiah is quoted eight times, including the announcement of his ministry, right, that’s fundamental in Isaiah chapter 61 the spirit of the Lord is upon me, for he has anointed me to bring good news to the poor, right, very, very famous passage. That's Jesus quoting from the book of Isaiah and he lived eight centuries before Jesus and it seems that he was a man of some influence, maybe even some wealth, maybe he was a part of the nobles or aristocracy because royalty was available, like he had access to speak to royalty. That's not, that's not somebody just walking in from some backwater in Israel somewhere and he had a long career as a prophet. He was able to speak to five different kings, kings that, we’ve already read through the books of the kings. So, we've gone through a lot of these stories. He spoke to Usiah and Jothem and Ahas and Hezekiah and Manasseh, and then there's a tradition both among the Jewish people and Christian tradition that Isaiah was martyred under King Manasseh. King Manasseh imprisoned him and eventually executed him by sawing him in half. That's a tradition, so that's not laid out in the Scriptures and we don’t have any other resources to know that…that it's more than a tradition. Although the book of Hebrews does talk about Saints being martyred, some stoned, some sawed in half, some killed with the sword, so there may be a reference there to Isaiah. And as we get going, it's 66 chapters and really like the first 39 chapters are chapters where the judgment of the Lord is being discussed and it's a very sobering 39 chapters. And then the second, kinda half from chapter 40 through the end is some of the most comforting portions of the Bible, very, very hopeful portions of Scripture, and that kinda gives us a little…little bit of a template for what we encounter when we read the books of prophecy. Yes, there are times that God, through the prophets, comes and says some pretty harsh things that are going to happen or are potential future things that might happen if the people continue on the path that they seem to be determined to go on. Then certain things are going to happen because of that, but it's also very, very typical to see in the prophets, God saying there's a path out of this. You can come back, you could be restored, and he speaks with kindness and compassion, inviting fellowship and restoration of relationship and renewal of covenant. And so, will see that in Isaiah as well as throughout many of the other prophets, but with that, let's go ahead and dive in, Isaiah chapters 1 and 2.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. All of this transition happening here at the beginning of the month settles us in. So, as we move into this new territory of Isaiah, we invite Your Holy Spirit to speak to us: give us understanding, give us wisdom, guide us, direct our steps, lead us deeper into Jesus, reveal the narrow path that leads to life, light our path, we pray in the name of Jesus we ask. Amen.

Announcements:

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And that's it for today, I’m Brian, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Prayer and Encouragements:

Good evening DAB family. This is Learning to Let Go from North Carolina. It’s been a while since I called in, there’s been a lot of changes in my life. But I was mainly calling in because I believe I heard the message from August 31st for Ms. Mercy who had nine children and 22 grandchildren so far and there was a report of her husband being a pedophile, inappropriately touching the children and that just hit my heart. That’s just such a profound, traumatic event for everyone involved, I’m sure. And I just wanted to let you know, I’m believe it was Ms. Mercy, said, that she was praying for healing and restoration for faith for her children and grandchildren, so I just want to let you know that I am thinking of you, hoping for that for you. I was also hoping that you all could pray for me. Like I said, there’s been a lot of transition in my life and I know eventually it will be for the better, and it’s definitely difficult to go through break-ups and such. But and I’m just praying for patience and peace through this healing process. I’d like to pray for that other person, just that all of this can be resolved and done with and over. And, to discontinue the push-and-pull and the back-and-forth. And so, if you all could pray for me for that as I do also pray for you all. You’re often in my thoughts and I really just appreciate people calling in and being vulnerable. And also, the praise reports so thank you all very much for that.

So, let me first of all say, I listen every day. And I hear all of you with your issues, believe me, I have many issues too. But what I want to do is first of all say thank you God for everything. I don't know, I know I don't need to lay out all my problems because as the Roman soldier said you don't need to come to my house. Say the word and it will be done. When we say Lord, You know all my issues, please help me with those issues. And once again I will not pray for everyone on DAB that say Lord you know who's asking. I pray for everyone in DAB and their issues. I've been a long-time listener. And I was kind of caught off guard by the August 31 reading, when God said to Job, where you when I laid the foundations of the earth, when the morning stars sang together and all the sons of God shouted for joy. So, this basically says that the Angels were here when God created the earth and then when you read Genesis and all of a sudden, the devil pops up, you have to kind of read the whole thing, then we learn about Lucifer. Anyway, I don't think it matters. It’s a matter of my salvation. But it did spike my curiosity, God says, seek knowledge: Proverbs 2 verse 6. For the Lord gives wisdom from his mouth comes knowledge and understanding. As we speak about knowing the real story of creation, which is referring to our salvation. Let me pray, dear Heavenly Father please ease the burden of all my DAB brothers and sisters, please ease my burdens. As You know what they are. But let me also say thank You for everything You have done for me. Thank you, in Jesus’ name. Amen.

[Singing] Oh, I keep my mind upon Jesus. That’s just what I need to do. I don’t need no fancy fandangle solution, just keep my mind upon you. Oh, I keep my heart upon Jesus. That’s just what I need to do. I don’t need to turn to anyone else, I just keep my heart upon you. Oh, I keep my eyes upon Jesus. That’s just what I need to do. Oh, I don’t need to stare at the glitter of the world. I just keep my eyes upon you. [End singing] Thank You Jesus, for rescuing me from myself.

Hello DABers, this is Sandy from Florida. I’m calling in for Mercy. For her prayer request. For her nine children and her 21 grandchildren. And her husband who’s in prison. And Mercy, you’re so strong. You’re so strong to call in for prayer. To take care of all your children and your grandchildren and what you’re going through. And mercy, I just pray the blood of Jesus would cover each one of you and that God would give you peace, understanding, patience and give you strength to do what you need to do to take care of your children. To direct your path, to give you guidance. I pray everyday that your children would forgive, release, let go of the pain and that God would heal every, every painful moment that and thing that has happened to them. And every wound would be healed, in Jesus’ name. And I pray that for you, Mercy, I pray the blood of Jesus and forgiveness, in your hearts. And Father God, I just pray for the hedge of protection around this entire family, Lord God. Give them Your purpose and Your plan. Lead them and guide them. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.

Hi DABers, it’s Bren in Central Florida. Just wanted to call in and let Cat know, even though she does know that we’re all praying for her, my family is also lifting her up. And her father-in-law, comfort him and give him his total peace, asking him to let him know He’s there. And just for strength and comfort for her family for whatever God choses to do in this situation. And that the family would draw closer no matter what God choses to do in this situation and just know that you’re loved. You’re loved, God loves you all so much. And we all love you. And also, praying for Anonymous who called to pray for her sister who’s struggling with mental illness. And I understand and we pray for you too. I just want you to know how much, how beautiful it is that you’re just loving her like Jesus. That’s the best we all can do is love each other the way Jesus loves us. So, you’re being lifted in prayer as well. And to the beautiful wife who lost her, lost her love of 38 years, I just want you to know that God, I know you already know how much he loves you all and He, nothing is impossible, He definitely has a way for you all to come together in peace and healing. And that’s what we’ll be praying for you all. I’m so sorry for that tragic loss and just know all of you, how much I love you all and God loves you all. If you can keep my family lifted up, we’re still recovering from COVID and especially my lungs, please. Love you all, God Bless you.    

[sampagnereads]

hey, everyone! it’s finally september 30, so i feel like it’s the perfect time for me to post my first monthly wrap-up! reading-wise, this month was pretty average. school started at the beginning of the month, and i ended up reading 6 books, which isn’t all that much to me. still, i read things that i quite enjoyed, which makes up for the lack of reading! under the cut, you can find more information about the books i read and what i thought about them.

1. Wonder Woman: Warbringer, by Leigh Bardugo. 4.5 stars

As the first instalment of the DC Icons series, Wonder Woman: Warbringer tells the story of Diana Prince, aka Wonder Woman, as a teenager rather than an adult. I went into this book knowing nothing more than that, and I personally feel like it led to the perfect reading experience. In my opinion, the official summary reveals a bit too much, and I recommend going into this book before reading it. 

Honestly, I went into this book knowing I was going to love it. Having always enjoyed Wonder Woman’s story, and having been a Bardugo fan for about a year now, it was a no-brainer to me that I was going to enjoy Wonder Woman: Warbringer. Still, I ended up being quite surprised by the story. Whilst it begins in the traditional Wonder Woman way, it becomes quite original as it goes on, and I honestly never saw the twists and turns of the story coming in advance. The plot was so good that it led to a story that was action-packed whilst letting the readers get to know the characters more deeply, which I adored. This story’s characters were all so diverse and fascinating, and I wish I could get more of them. They were my favourite part of the story, and because of them, I would actually consider re-reading this book (which I don’t do very often). 

2. Eliza and Her Monsters, by Francesca Zappia. 4.5 stars

Set mainly in high school, Eliza and Her Monsters follows Eliza Mirk, an introverted teenage girl who has no friends in “real life”. Online, however, Eliza is the creator of one of the world’s most popular WebComics, and is quite famous, although she does it all under a secret identity. Then, one day, a new boy transfers to her school, and ends up being one of the biggest fanfiction writers of her webcomic. Whilst hiding who she is from him, Eliza starts to form a friendship with said boy, and things start to change for the better for her, up until her secret identity is revealed, and Eliza’s world turns upside down.

I received this book in my first ever OwlCrate box, and I have to admit that I was a bit disappointed by it. I was never the biggest fan of YA contemporary, and therefore felt a bit let down. Because of that, it took me quite a while to finally read this book. However, I finally picked it up this month, and I couldn’t be any more glad about it. Whilst Eliza was a bit annoying at times, it was understandable due to the fact that she was a typical teenager, and I still couldn’t help but get extremely attached to her. Due to the attachment, the story was a bit hard to get through at times, but at the same time, it was extremely heart-warming. Thing is, things weren’t easy for Eliza, and I think it’s important to explore that. However, whilst I thoroughly recommend this book, I think that it’s important to be aware that this book contains themes of suicide and depression.

3. China Rich Girlfriend, by Kevin Kwan. 5.0 stars

As China Rich Girlfriend is the second book in the Crazy Rich Asians series, I can’t tell you much about the summary without spoiling the first book. Therefore, I’ll summarize the first book for you! Basically, Crazy Rich Asians is about a girl named Rachel Chu who agrees to go on a summer long vacation to Singapore with her boyfriend, Nick, to go to his best friend’s wedding and meet his family. Problem is, Rachel has no clue that Nick is one of the most prized bachelors in Singapore, as his family is one of the richest there. They’re the richest of the rich, and they don’t exactly approve of Rachel. On top of that, you also follow other members of Nick’s family, who are all more interesting than the other.

Whilst I didn’t enjoy China Rich Girlfriend quite as much as I enjoyed Crazy Rich Asians, I still thoroughly loved it. These books read like the best kind of rom-com, and are basically impossible to put down once you pick them up. Even the most hateable characters are impossible not to get attached to (except for one *cough*Astriddeservesbetter*cough*). Reading about rich people is just so much fun, and though their problems might be silly at times, we also get to see legit problems they deal with, which gives an interesting depth to the story. Honestly, I feel like I’m watching a movie when I read those books, and I can’t get enough of them. I 100% recommend them, and I can’t wait to get to the third book of the series.

4. Little & Lion, by Brandy Colbert. 5.0 stars

Taking place in Los Angeles, California, Little & Lion follows our protagonist, Suzette, as she comes home from boarding school for the summer. Through the story, we see Suzette dealing with the family she’s been distanced from for a year (just after her brother was diagnosed as bipolar type two), the friends she hasn’t seen in far too long, and a new crush on a girl her brother might also be interested in. (Do not fear; the love triangle isn’t overwhelming.)

As someone who might also have bipolar type 2 (the doctors aren’t certain, but still treat me for it), I loved the representation of mental health we got in this book. I thoroughly sympathized with the medication aspect of the story, and I never expected I’d get to read about something so close to my heart. On top of that, as a bisexual woman, I loved the bisexual rep we got, as Suzette herself is bisexual and learning to deal with it. I could completely understand what she was going through, and was reminded of myself as a teenager when I read about the way she felt. Also, whilst I can’t speak on it due to the fact that I’m white and agnostic, Suzette is black and jewish, which is vital to who she is as a character. Through the story, we see how being a black, jewish, bisexual jewish teenage girl affects Suzette and the way people act around her, and I found it thoroughly fascinating. I honestly loved all aspects of this book, and I can’t recommend it enough to everyone in the world. This is a heart-warming story that is, at its core, about family, love and friendship.

5. Three Dark Crowns, by Kendare Blake. 4.0 stars

On an matriarchal island where magic exists, a queen is deposed from her functions when she gives birth to triplets who each possess a different kind of magic, and are sent to live on different parts of the island when they’re still children. Once these triplets come of age, they must fight to the death to figure out which of them will become the next queen. 

Though the official summary makes it sound like a fast-paced, action-packed story, Three Dark Crowns is actually a slow-burning, politics-heavy novel that relies mainly on character development. Whilst there is little action in this novel up until the very end, we get to know the main characters very well, and I found it impossible not to get attached to the three of them. In fact, I personally got so attached that I found myself cheering for all three of them, which isn’t exactly the smartest thing. Still, this book seems to be either a hit or miss for people, so maybe don’t go into it with too high expectations. Worst case? You’re not surprised. Best case? You’re surprised in the best way possible. 

6. Magyk, by Angie Sage. 3.5 stars

Set in a world where Magyk exists, this book is hard to describe without spoiling everything, which is easy enough to see once you read the official summary. To put it simply, this story follows the lost princess of the kingdom as she must run away to avoid getting killed just like her mother, the queen, was. That’s the most basic summary I can give you without spoiling everything. Sorry! (Also, please avoid reading the book’s official summary. It’s the worst.)

So, I first read this book in French a long time ago, and decided to re-read it (but this time in English) due to nostalgia. It was a quick read, but honestly, I was a bit disappointed. Maybe this was because I vaguely remembered everything that was going to happen next, but nothing in this story felt like a big surprise. I get that this is middle grade, but kids are smart, and I bet they can see those things coming as well. Still, the story was fun, the characters, except for a few exceptions, were loveable, and I read this very quickly. Had I just based this rating on this re-read, I would have probably given it less than 3.5 stars, but I’ve decided to rate this as I would have rated it back when I first read this instead, as this is a middle-grade novel.