#it was so Good i felt to Alive
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Take It Easy☀️
#haikyuu#hinata shouyou#haikyuu fanart#anime fanart#fanart#madsart#digital art#anime#I just finished the Haikyuu manga#good god#what am I supposed to do now????#go work for all my hopes and dreams?????#literally the best manga ever#I’ve never felt so alive#so happy#I cried like 7 times#just between the nekoma match and the end#god#so good#a masterpiece#I’m so very proud of Hinata my baby
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totally lore-accurate swanqueen screencap redraws 4/∞
they're on their first date :3c
#swan queen#swanqueen#regina mills#emma swan#once upon a time#ouat#my art#sq art#sq redraw#i wanted to draw this scene mainly because regina just looked SO PLEASED WITH HERSELF i love her face#but i'm not super happy with the result :<#shoulda picked a different scene after all i felt like i couldn't really do much with this one#(or maybe i'm just not good enough at drawing her yet she's so difficult aaaa)#but i still wanted to finish this anyway!!#i hope you enjoy :>#thank u also for sending me asks with recommendations for scenes for me to redraw!!#i'll keep them in my inbox until i get around to them#thank you so much for the warm welcome to this space ; -; 💜#i'm so happy to see this ship still very much alive after all this time
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Have a late valentines gift from the automaton au guys♡ they love you
(I love you too)
#fnaf sun#fnaf moon#sundrop#moondrop#dca#daycare attendant#dcamv#my art#automaton au#hi i am alive#sorry i am still not much better.... i am feeling pretty egh but i am proud to say this was something i felt good about drawing#so things are looking up i guess#i might still need to take things slowly#no projects no drawing things because i feel like i have to deliver something#just drawing because that makes me happy#lets see were that takes me
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#12:12#i’ve been cleaning + doing laundry all day so i look a lil sweaty and like i’ve been running around but weee#hope you qts don’t mind selfies 2 days in a row lmaoo gemini season has me feeling alive for the first time in a lil while c:#i hope you’ve all had a good day 2day <3#my post#mine#myself#my face#felt cute#selfie#selfie tag#selfie time#selfie post#mirror pic#mirror selfie#face#denim shorts#jean shorts#denim jeans#belly button ring#midriff#crop top#tummy#no makeup#sleepy girl#messy hair
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you are so lucky to not have watched s4-8
people always ask me 'katie why did you only watch half of voltron??' and i'm just like guys i thought we all agreed that voltron was not a very good show 💀
#so like why would i spend time watching something not very good LMAO#ask#anonymous#actually i was wrong i did watch season 4 and parts of season 5 and season 6#but i had to stop because the lotor plotline was pissing me off too much#if they had kept zarkon alive as the primary antagonist and made lotor a reluctant ally to the team then i would have liked that a lot more#but the whole... lotor becomes emperor and then voltron allies with the new galra empire plotline was just sooo bogus to me like#it was such a shallow way to resolve the voltron vs galra empire story#also i hated the plotline where keith leaves the team mainly because i think the bom are also very boring#i really do think the idea of allura and lotor being the inheritors of altean alchemy is a compelling idea but the way they executed it...#finally i strongly dislike all the random forced timeskips. it just felt like the writers would use a timeskip#whenever they wanted to force a plot development offscreen that they didn't want to devote time to in the story#at the end of the day idgaf about ships i care about the story and character arcs. and i liked nothing LOL
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you guys really don’t get him tbfh
#I would’ve felt bad drowning this one bc op’s heart is in the right place lol#but dean stans Please stop flattening him as a character. he’s so much more interesting when you accept that he sucks#and it’s always ppl who paid no attention to sam who react to jack as if his arc was brand new to the show#as if the way dean abused jack wasn’t a 1:1 reflection of how he treated sam in s4-s5#dean doesn’t make ppl feel safe lmfao that isn’t his priority. his priority is keeping them (sam) alive by any means necessary#including means that violate mental and physical boundaries#and dean is only Good With Kids until they’re old enough to start doing things he disagrees with#sam is the one who connects with the troubled teens and the kids who hate their families#dean connects with kids who are young enough to hero-worship him#this sounds super harsh but. you can even take his relationship with ben alone as an example#spn
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i think the thing that gets me so bad with this last episode is that there was no consequences. everyone came back unharmed. like they fought a god of death and he was gone in like thirty minutes and everyone is vibing while eating pizza??
#my opinions sorry LMAOO#i just#idk#it gets me because this was meant to be a big bad#and i keep thinking about how everyone came back alive in the same episode#again just my opinion#doctor who#mine#fifteenth doctor#sutekh#ruby sunday#also all that build up for her mom and she was just some random person who happened to point at a sign#like what#it just…#it felt lazy to me?#also david tennant seventeen was just chilling with donna?? LIKE#i still liked the episode#or i liked parts#for the last twenty minutes i was just in shock because it felt so inconsequential 🤷#ALSO KATES DEATH?? i was immediately like… oh they are coming back#so i wasn’t even sad 😭#i keep going back to season one in 2005#they had this huge threat of the daleks… they KILLED people and sacrifices had to be made to have a good outcome#which is how doctor who goes so often#but somehow in this episode everyone was relatively fine#AGAIN THE GOD OF DEATH#they brought them BACK so i am meant to think they were strong enough to be a threat twice but everyone was fine#they just got blipped (like marvel HELP me) for like an hour
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#not to be a broken lil man on main#but I was on the phone with my dad for 30 minutes just now (that's a lot for a phone call with him) and like.... damn. yeah. i do have one#parent who's not horrible huh#we talked a lot about my plans for the future...... which I only now told him bcs scary and bcs........ I never ever during my 25 years of#being alive got the impression from my parents that something like this would be an acceptable career choice or something they'd support#and I mean. my [redacted] of a mother is the best example for how. not alright it is with her that I'm doing something that's not very...#traditional for this family#but anyways. my dad was absolutely fucking lovely#to the point that I get getting teary eyed and felt my throat closing up cause. huh. i guess in his own way he does love me and believe in#he asked me to send him a link or a pdf of my first conference report because he wants to keep it somewhere 😭😭😭😭😭😭#I'm....... ouch. ouch ouch ouch ouch ouch#you know the ghosting I am really good at with tumblr chats (sorry guys. ilu. I just suck at communication)???? i'm also extremely good at#that with whatsapp chats and just. not calling my irl loved ones#so idk. hearing him say he understands and just wanted to make sure I wasn't upset with him and like. wanted to know if I was doing okay.#damn. okay. damn#idk#this was such a good talk and he was so suppertive and non-judgemental and I actually told him about my birthday and how my mother's call#upset me and he was like. yeah. same. and like... he's basically gone no contact with her as well as it turns out#idk. I really should give him more credit and like... I feel like there's so much shifting and change and development happening while I'm n#not there and sometimes it's hard to remember that he actually /could/ understand some things. just cause I've always been so used to not#sharing anything about myself because it wasn't safe when I was younger and... idk........ lots of emotions going on rn#so glad we talked though. so glad#simon.out.#if you read all this.... idk man.... sorry for oversharing but thanks for caring ig <3
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the other day i walked around the golden lake w my love and the sun was setting hot and orange and we watched a brown duck preening through the weeds, ducking her head under the dark water. the cool lake swallowed up my tired feet to the ankles and we counted the dog walkers with their curly panting doodles and their handsome german shepherds and their whip smart little terriers and we admired the careful construction of a sand castle whose moat held determinedly against the lapping of the waves. we could feel in our chests the persistent thunderous thumping of celebratory music at the finish line of the lakeside 5k, welcoming each gasping runner across its bounds. and i felt like crying. i felt like curling into myself and crying. we walked through the swamp of the bird sanctuary afterwards and listened to the woods sing and croak and groan and then we went and got ube and yuzu gelato and devoured it suntired and sweating on the couch in our living room. and i was so overcome w a deep and true unshakeable happiness and a sort of confused grief that i wanted to sob and sob and sob.
#i am so happy for the first time in my entire life#a consistent and true joyfulness#i am in love w my life#i want to stick around to see it#and i mean that w my entire being for the first time in my whole life#and to say that means confronting the first 24 years of my life where that wasn’t true#where i was miserable and heartbroken and unkind and dishonest and cruel#and i didn’t want to be alive#even when i was doing well i still didn’t want to be alive#for 24 years.#i had no fucking idea being alive could be so easy. i had no idea.#i want to hold myself and tell them i want to wrap myself up and say it will be BETTER#it will be so so far from perfect but it will be so so good you just have to hold on#i am so happy but i am mourning#i don’t know how to articulate it at all i just feel#happy but grieving#i LOVE this new city we live in i LOVE it here#i like my job enough to stand it for enough hours a week to get by#i have the time and the energy to throw myself into hobbies like knitting and cooking#i watch one or two good movies a week#i eat delicious food i’ve made and from restaurants we want to try#i’m IN LOVE. with my girlfriend in a way that’s so overwhelming and unlike anything i’ve ever felt that words don’t do it justice#i have friends who are gentle and patient with me when it’s hard for me to reach out#i am fighting agoraphobia tooth and fucking nail and i’m seeing the world and experiencing it#i laugh every day!!!! every single day!!!!#i have a goofy wonderful dog and an incredibly sweet cat#i talk to my baby brother all the time and he tells me he loves me and he’s graduating college soon and i’m so fucking proud#i wish i would’ve known how good it would all become#i wish i could’ve known#personal
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honk
#idk if this fandom is alive anymore but here's burnt toast man#shall i tag this shit.......... sure lets tag this shit#payday 2#payday#hoxton#was thinkin about how therell be another one of these games and felt the sudden urge to draw the fave again#payday tumblr sure was fun to be part of back in the day#anyways i'm off to bed... been insanely tired today and hopefully i'll get to some of the art on my to do list#tomorrow i meant to say. hope to get to it tomorrow lol#i have some nice ones there. though. mostly ones i won't be able to post here lmfao#maybe throw in oc with pride flag thing on this list so i'll have sth posting worthy.#in a non related note at the end here i just finished playing tlou on the pc and it was so much fun... never did finish it on the console#just watched others play through it#i smell an AU but i'll keep that to myself because whomst cares#honk honk good night
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Okay!! Done with The Count of Monte Cristo. That was a ride. I did not enjoy the ending in itself much. The final chapter felt a bit disjointed and while I can understand Edmond was trying to teach Morrel and Valentine a lesson that's more important than any treasure, I think keeping them apart was unnecessarily convoluted and, frankly, cruel, especially keeping Valentine in the dark about her family's demise.
That being said, compared to the 2024 movie, which was my gateway into the book (spoilers for the movie ahead):
I still think it was very well adapted and I generally enjoy the changes made.
In particular, Benedetto/Cavalcanti's storyline in the movie works wonderfully and his relationship to both Eugénie and Haydée was cute. I do prefer this Cavalcanti over book!Cavalcanti because he feels more rounded. However, the movie cannot top Villefort's demise in the book. It's extremely good and heart wrenching.
The movie utilizes Albert and Haydée in the end in a vaguely similar way to Morrels and Valentine in the book, which was appreciated. They close the circle their literal or adoptive parents started and Edmond sails off on his own and I think there's a lot of beauty in that too.
I disagree that the changes made to Haydée's character in the movie reinforce the orientalism. The movie did not even try suppressing (or addressing) the orientalism, I do agree with that, and believe things could have been handled better. But Haydée's seduction game is entirely premeditated. She's not alluring as a walking oriental femme fatale, she is rather explicitly made to look that way. She and the count play with that as part of the trap they are laying for Albert. This mirrors Cavalcanti's trap too. It is similar to the way "Sinbad the Sailor" metaphorically seduces Franz d'Épinay in the book when they first met. I'm not saying it was perfect though. I'd say the orientalism in regards to Haydee has more to do with casting choices, costumes and treatment of her background than with the narrative use made of her in the movie. Sorry, but revenge-seeking willing to seduce her way to her goals movie!Haydée that still has a filialish role to the Count is definitely more appealing to me than submissive (literally a slave), love-sick book!Haydée who most of the time only waits and pines. She does testify against Fernando on her own accord and free will and shows an absolutely amazing strength and I love book!Haydée for that but it's not often that she gets to shine like she deserves.
Making Edmond and Fernando childhood friends is actually good, I loved that! But making the Mondegos an already affluent and well positioned family by the beginning and making Mercedes/Edmond lowkey forbidden because of class difference was not so good. One of the most interesting things in the book is getting to see just how much their status improves -with Edmond being the price to pay.
The movie does go much easier on Mercedes, WHICH SHE DESERVES. The aspect of her being "unfaithful" is moderately prominent in Edmond's discourse in the book, even if Edmond tells her to her face she's a saint. Given her ending, I think the book narratively does punish her for that so-called infidelity which I personally believe to be absolutely unfair but. 19th century right.
Other book things I prefer over the movie: Fernando's ending. The final battle was super fun to watch but sorry. Fernando offing himself because his family left him adds a whole other layer of tragedy and gives him a sort of redeeming quality (even if in the book they don't really put it this way). In the movie he has no redeeming quality lol
Also. I get why Noirtier was not much there. Same happens with the Morrels and Valentine. But Noirtier is one of the characters from the book that fascinate me the most so I'll miss him
#laura reads#the count of monte cristo#what. a. ride. some parts were ok and a few were even a bit dull or felt overlong (seriously too many poisonings) but the good moments#were GREAT and the overall arc ties very well together and of course it's very long so a lot of tkme to breathe#tbh it was like reading/listening to a telenovela#dumas. had you been born like 150 years later... he'd be making either prestige tv or longest melodramas you can think of but#any of them would blow your mind away. that man was born to be a movie director how can i make this point better understood#also. book edmond was comparatively softer on fcking DANGLARS than on Mercedes. like I don't think he meant to but he's always quoting her#infidelity like dude. I'm not saying this to be mean but FOURTEEN YEARS AWAY edmond with no news that you were even alive!!! be serious
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summer nights
#stardew valley#sdv sebastian#sdv Sam#sdv abigail#aberdeen#easel#hi I’m still alive. been so busy + sick + working on other stuff#this was a cool down comic I did between other stuff… no plan no script just vibes#felt good :)
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Amidst the wisteria
#fire emblem engage#fire emblem#fe engage#fe 17#rosado#rosado fire emblem#rosado fe#died a bit during finals week but i'm alive#anyways i still haven't beaten engage lol#i'm like but what do i do when i finish it...#either way the rosado brainrot is still going strong lol#every single time i think about him I'm like man why is he so awesome...#props to all the people who constantly redraw their art y'all are strong#i had to repaint rosado in the beginning and i felt like death#i also had to redraw the bg and i was like nnnnghghhhhhg#i honestly thought of abandoning the bg but at least it's good practice....#my art
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have to say, exceptionally vindicated about my romance choice for this character. "this isn't a good idea"/"sometimes a bad idea is better" and "you like to walk a little close to the edge"/"so do you"/"at least i know i'm doing it" are SO in character. reckless, a little impulsive, maybe too much outward confidence, totally willing to commit to a potentially terrible idea--yeah, it's all coming together
#also laughing a little that some people have said lucanis either doesn't notice or ignores your flirts#he clearly doesn't#he plays ball flirting with you at the cafe too. he's quite good at flirting tbh--much as he feels he's not as good as illario#like yes there's a moment or two you don't get much of a response but mostly because those flirts are like 'glad you're alive!'#meanwhile he's experiencing Horrors#so i get why this comes when it does but nobody say my man doesn't have game. he's uncertain as fuck about this#but he DOES have game#also the breathy way he said 'at least i know i'm doing it' lives in my head rent free now#datv spoilers#rosie plays games kinda okay#that dragon sure does age#i felt this way about my inquisitor and cullen also tbh#got the first romance scene and she was awkward as fuck in it and i was like 'yeah that tracks for her character' and i knew#i picked the right romance for her lol
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#can I just. scream for a second#so as is news to no one#we need to start over the entire us medical system from scratch#also I would like to be flayed alive and start over from scratch in the skin department as well#anyway for context: I've had some kind of rash/acne/infection/irritation all over my legs for over a year now#have tried various products and changed habits and products to try and get rid of it to no avail#everyone said you should really just go to a dermatologist#(I was not that inclined to do so bc the previous and only time I'd seen a dermatologist it was not a good experience. very condescending#also I don't like making appointments and stuff. girl I don't have time)#but I decided to be an adult and go (my insurance info seemed to imply I could go with zero copay even)#spoilers: that was not the case#anyway so I show up and surprise surprise: it sucked#she was dismissive and condescending imo. was literally like 'well it could be A B or C but I can't tell'#'all of those are basically impossible to get rid of anyway but the things to try are X Y or Z'#I asked to try Z since X and Y are things that I already tried and did nothing (which I had told her!!!)#but she just kept being like 'you just need to stop picking at it. that's the real problem and that's what's exacerbating your scarring'#(wow thanks never thought of that!) (she also insinuated that my scarring was ugly)#girl I'm not 5 years old I understand.#unfortunately for me that is a compulsion so strong it would probably take years of directed therapy to get me to stop doing that#what I'm here to see you about is to figure out what the problem is and how to stop it from happening in the first place#and STOP TRYING TO MAKE IT A COSMETIC ISSUE#it's causing me pain and discomfort that's the main problem! I would like that to stop!! and me not touching it would not solve that proble#also I wanted to ask her about something else but they were too quick about it. felt very Handled if you know what I mean#but anyway#she gave me a prescription for topical antibiotic which was the thing I had not tried#apparently my insurance doesn't cover it and it's also made of gold and plutonium or something#so she gave me a coupon for it#but get this#when I went to pick it up at the pharmacy they didn't take the coupon#the guy said. 'um this only works for the generic brand. and we don't have the generic brand'
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me when i meet with my colleges first out trans teacher who is like a celebrity with me after one of my teachers puts me in contact with her again (i had interviewed said trans teacher 4 years prior and hadnt met with her since) and she tells me tjat my teacher had so many positive things to say about me, about how i was one of her brightest most well spoken students and that she (within like 5 minutes of having been talking) immediately sees exactly what my professor had been talking about and so many super implied positives about me that i would never had known about and i dod everything in my power to avoid prying for more details but even what i heard was soso nicies
#iwillspeakincessantly#god it felt so nice to meet with her again#talking woth someone whos been so influential at my school and the whole state as far as transgender and queer policy making and has#so many connections amd experience and is also trans and historically a teacher bfor she retired#genuinely makes me feel so much better about my life and where im going#and less worried about if ill ever be able to live a peaceful life as a trans twacher when she personally knows#multiple other transmen tbats shes taught who are now teaching IN MY STATE#safely and happily#ough#we said wed meet more in the future and she encouraged me to join the cities pride group that she had founded and is the head of#and maybe tjis time ill actjally go#she even gifted me a book that she had had that she thinks would give me solace and comfort in my life#tbat was also written by a trans man sinxe she thinks im easily intelligent enough to get the humor and referwnces in#god she said i was well spoken and articulated even tho i feel so stupid and inarticulate sometimes#since i ramble a lot and lose my thoughts and i feel like my speaking vocabulary is so lowbrow and cheap often#no matter how many times other peope say i always sound so intelligent when i speak#ARGH#been super steessed about a lot of things in my life and if ill make it out alive but just this short hour and a half convo over a food#has made me feel so mich better and happier and hopeful#argh argh ougj i love finding out that people talk immense amount of positive things about me#god#i was rlaking about how often i struggle woth socializing amd making friends and she aas like really? ive been having a wondefful time#walkimg with you youre so intelligent and well spoken and its like thank you my issues ckme from group settings#and unclear un familiar subjects and ettiqutes of my fellow youths#but it made me feel so good about myself#im gonna implode :333333 positive
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