#it was probably twilight because man that movie is so bad (its really funny tho)
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Needed to do my own spin on this because the way the original made me bust out laughing was incredible
#og is by @sweepswoop_ on twt#shitpost#meme#meme redraw#homestuck#john egbert#rose lalonde#grimdorks#johnrose#rosejohn#tHEIR FACES. DEAR GOD HELP#love it when i chuckle at my own idiotic things#anyway the movie right#it was probably twilight because man that movie is so bad (its really funny tho)#yeah i watched twilight like last year and let me tell you the amount of dying was held was frankly... something#i think i had to pause the damn thing every five minutes because i kept laughing so much
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@akingdomtheorist
So! Ridiculous conversation that’s gonna strike me as funny for the next week, probably. Which I could definitely use, but whatever. Thought I’d amuse you with it since your cupcake started it, lol.
keyofshadows Tomorrow's Eli's birthday. Confetti for all.
akingdomtheorist Adion will make him a cupcake
keyofshadows Awe. He'd be touched. And Adion would get a hug. Also one of those pointy birthday hats.
akingdomtheorist What if the cupcake was shaped like a pointy birthday hat
keyofshadows Pfffff he'd demand to know if the dragon was conspiring with his mom. She used to sew him a replica of Yen Sid's hat every few years and make him wear it on his birthday while she took pictures. From his literal 'I'm twenty minutes old' birthday until he was eighteen. IS THIS POINTY BIRTHDAY HAT CAKE A REFERENCE TO HIS HAT NEMESIS
sstingray yen sid knows about the hats
keyofshadows Is he amused or shaking his head because what is wrong with these people
sstingray secretly amused but won't show it is my wager
keyofshadows I wonder how much Eli was complaining under his breath about it during his lovely summer of responsibility training also I wonder how many dirty looks he was giving Yen Sid's hat while the man was wearing it because whoops
sstingray the master probably noticed it and said something to him eventually.
keyofshadows lmao. "It's not you Sir, honest! It's just...uh...nothing, actually, never mind, I'm supposed to be mopping or something, better get back to that." /slinks off because oh my god, explaining to Yen Sid about the Hat when he has no idea he already knows, pfff. Poor Eli.
sstingray not pictured: ray in the background trying really hard not to laugh
keyofshadows Oh sure, enjoy your amusement now, he'll get you back for it. Someday. Somehow. Maybe. She can babysit his eventual demonspawn, that'll do it. ...Which would be more of a punishment to the kids, actually.
sstingray and she'll get just as much fun out of that as she did watching him
keyofshadows Okay, we totally know what we're doing with Auryn when he misbehaves. Off to aunt Ray's for a pop quiz!
sstingray secretly gives him cookies when they're not looking
keyofshadows Ray's gonna end up with a kid that mouths off just to be sent for 'punishment', you know. Though he'll be more of an actual pain in the ass as a teenager. Amelia says don't worry about that, she and Nico will knock him into shape. With his own Keyblade, if necessary.
sstingray but eli she is not a tool to punish your children with! gosh!!
sstingray well if he misbehaves TOO badly he'll still learn not to cross her
keyofshadows The Grasshopper knows this. But really, it's Date Night and he and Specter really wanted to have some quiet movie time that didn't involve Auryn yelling in the background from upstairs. I should probably feel bad for Ray having to deal with the next generation of troublemakers, but nope. Too busy snickering.
sstingray it's fine they'll watch a movie that eli doesn't want him to see
keyofshadows Which would probably be anything with drunk elephants. Dumbo is Evil. So is Bambi, but for completely different reasons.
sstingray well. if auryn is up for it...
keyofshadows This is Eli's punk firstborn, of course he is.
sstingray welp. pink elephants on parade it is!
keyofshadows And Ray then gets to field ALL the questions, like how can elephants get drunk, and why isn't HE even allowed more than a can of soda a day if whatever Dumbo had was worse - wait, was that elephant beer? Or did he drink funny water? And if he drinks too much soda is he gonna see pink elephants too? Is THAT why he's not allowed too much? Can he have a few cans and find out?
sstingray fermentation is a terrible thing, you're too young kid, maybe idk but i saw this video once of elephants eating fermented fruits and getting totally trashed, honestly who even knows anymore, no, no it's because you'll get a sugar high and it's also terrible for your health, and no
keyofshadows He is completely unhappy with all of these answers, he'll have you know. Except the trashed elephant video, he wants to see that. BUT. He's gonna complain to Nico first (who will tell him to Listen To Aunt Ray She Knows More Than Them) and then he'll go home and whine at his dad BECAUSE AUNT RAY IS BEING UNFAIR FIX THIS
keyofshadows Eli just snickering and yeah, no, you have no idea of the meaning of 'unfair' when it comes to her, short stuff, sorry.
sstingray eli's probably like "that's what she does there is nothing i can do"
keyofshadows Nor does he wish to try, he's too old for another Darkside/Twilight Thorn/Who Knows What That Is pop quiz. He has kids now! (He's never too old, lmao. Kai'll boot him over for laughs.)
sstingray in which kai accidentally initiates a game of corridor ping pong with eli as the ball
keyofshadows Pfff. Kai says he thought he was going to get into trouble for booting the Epic Dork through Corridors, or does that only count when he's kicking him into the Maw?
sstingray nnnnno he'll probably be in trouble for it later but aunt ray has a life too you know she can't deal with your antics all the time!! there are seas to be sailed! treasures to be found! magics to learn!
keyofshadows Good, then can she take Soren with, he needs a way to deal with him this week that A - Does not involve setting his sneakers on fire AGAIN and B - Keeps Ro from rescuing him. Little brother gets seasick, little brother won't be warping over to pick him up. ...The maturity is astounding.
sstingray just for that she'll kick kai into the ocean
keyofshadows This is punishment how? He can swim. Also will probably open a Corridor and drop into it before he hits the water because he's a little shit.
sstingray either way he's off her ship so she'll count it as a win
sstingray not if she kicks him into her own portal and drops him right above the water
keyofshadows This is how you make enemies, Ray. (lmao, as if he'd do more than sulk for a few days before showing up again to get cookies/ask a favor/see what she thinks is a good present for Ro's birthday)
sstingray puhlease she'll take kai on pirate adventures someday
keyofshadows Do we really want a Keyblade wielder pretending to be a pirate. Or even just on the ship for longer than thirty seconds. (Yes.)
sstingray um duh?? how fun could that be
keyofshadows Kai's pointing out it should be Keyblade MASTER by that time, get it right. This from Mr. 'There's no way I'd ever be that good' who eventually is because whoops, Auryn's training is filled with fetching the chips Mastery Exams. I didn't know that traumatizing was another word for fun.
sstingray isn't that the epitome of everyone's time with their favorite aunt
keyofshadows There was just a resounding 'YES', so.
sstingray well there you go!
keyofshadows /snicker
keyofshadows The pirate thing is gonna turn into tradition, just like Ray taking on Eli as an apprentice started that ball rolling for him. She should pop on by one of the rabbit holes of Wanderer's Refuge again and see if she can land anywhere near Fen's time again. Be greeted by a slightly older (no more than 18, probably) Az, who happily informs her about how she's 'retraining' Celia's apprentice Seth, much to her dad's horror. Probably much to Ray's too, lol. 'Wait, wasn't he the boy that kept going creeper on you? That you hated? WHAT ARE YOU DOING'
sstingray no no its not a bad thing retraining is good
sstingray show him the light girl you go though lol god forbid ray ever have kids and they get mixed up with eli's family that's just gonna be chaos everywhere
keyofshadows Fen asks Ray to PLEASE not encourage his baby, he doesn't like Seth, he doesn't trust him, how does he know he's not going back to Celia and telling her things AZ IS NOT READY FOR THIS STUFF. OMG
sstingray also how would even feel about ray showing up again Oh welp
keyofshadows SO MUCH CHAOS.
sstingray that's the thing about light fen, sometimes you just gotta trust someone
keyofshadows Also no one minds Ray's random drop-ins, she's the Refs boogieman, after all.
sstingray and maybe put a tracker on them u know whatever works
keyofshadows He refuses to trust Seth, he's a little shit.
sstingray excellent her legend will live on
keyofshadows Az'll threaten her kids with Ray popping out of nowhere, just for the entertainment value.
sstingray I have a feeling her hypothetical family would get on great in the chaos tho lmao az can be like IT HAPPENS. A LOT ACTUALLY. we should probably do something about that
keyofshadows Just like how she's naming her firstborn son Jalen, also for the entertainment value. She can hear the grumping from the original through the rabbit hole, lmfao.
sstingray listen ray never asked to be an accidental time traveler it's weird ok
keyofshadows Also hilarious
sstingray she'll be sure to tell Jalen that when she gets back
keyofshadows The kid's gonna be the bounciest, most cheerful baby ever. /cackle
sstingray Oh how delightful!
keyofshadows Az thinks so~
keyofshadows Fen's twitching now because apparently Az is over her crush on Leo and he'd actually rather she go drool over the grease-covered boy Not From Here as opposed to the direction she's looking in. /facepalm
sstingray he could always come back :v
keyofshadows Imagine Fen trying to convince Leo to distract his daughter from the weirdo she's currently 'retraining'. For her own good, of course, not his nerves. /dies
sstingray leo is like whoa that is none of my business dude. slowly backs away.
keyofshadows Az is just smirking. Ha ha dad. But hey, nice to see you Leo, still eating sandwiches out of that toolbelt of yours? Somebody made rice krispy treats if he wants any.
sstingray great now that he gets to see her again, yes, and y e s where can find them?!
keyofshadows lol. Just opens a Light corridor and hands him a whole plateful.
sstingray !!! did he ever tell her he loves her cause he totally does
keyofshadows OH GOOD WAY TO START OFF THE AWKWARD BLUSHING LEO THANKS
sstingray thumbs up!!
keyofshadows Fen's trying not to applaud. Go away, you, quit trying to influence things. His wife would swat him.
#kingdom hearts au#world refugees#Snapshots#long post#plotting maybe#friends#Eli's descendants are weird#then again so is he so it makes sense#aunt Ray: terrorizing the family through time and space with her pop quizzes#Light help Seth if he ever steps out of line again actually#it'd probably be worse once he's actual family than if he were just Celia's apprentice#also someone needs to stop her from teaching tainted dream magic to people#it's not going to end well one of these days
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