#it should be fine tho none of my others have had been removed

[tutuandscoot]

It’s less than an hour till the 20th for me so here is my 5 year anniversary video a little bit early. I actually made this initially about 8 months ago but decided to save it for this special day. I put a lot of work into this one (as I do all my videos) so if you all could please share this around I’d really appreciate it 💜

[trellia]

I think this post is a long time coming. But also, maybe 1 - someone has pointers to help and 2 - maybe someone else is struggling similarly and would like to know said pointers too.

I have been quite the recluse the past few months. From everyone, really. Why that is why I’m making this post. If you feel like I’ve been drawing away, you’re not wrong. I have. I’ve not been doing too good since… I’d say October. A lot of events have turned my world around for one, realizing what I am living in and not what I thought I was living in. That was something on its own…. At the same time, I was going through the steps to figure out if I have ADHD. I found out a couple months ago that yes, indeed, I do have ADHD.

The diagnosis was first a relief: finally, I now know there’s nothing wrong with me, I’m just wired different. However, relief soon turned into contempt. I became very, very angry. I am very angry. I just reached my 40’s. For at least 35+ years, I’ve been degraded and hurt by the people who should have protected me, understood me, especially in my childhood. Teachers, principals and parents of other children took part in this bullying campaign their children had going, only because I wasn’t following the ‘norms’. I endured trauma so great that I can barely function today.

I mean, I look at the videos of my childhood and I see it immediately: I’m not like the other kids. I’m more hyper, excited, and I just want everyone to take part in the fun, but I’m too much for it. It’s right there. I was called names by adults, and scolded for not doing things the way neurotypical people would. I was called lazy. I was told I don’t care for anyone but myself when, in fact, I have always put everyone ahead of me because I would rather see them happy than be happy myself. So you can imagine how difficult it was to hear that I am selfish and don’t care for anyone else…

I’m also angry at the current people in my life. Some of which have told me to ‘fix’ myself because I was an inconvenience they didn’t want to deal with. So I tried EVERY way to do so, and of course that didn’t work because I was trying to put bandaids on symptoms rather than help with what was the actual problem, but then when I asked for help, I was shunned away like I didn’t deserve it. I lost an entire decade (my late 20’s and my 30’s) asking myself what the hell is wrong with me, why am I such a terrible person, and why can’t I do anything right, and spending my 30’s walking on eggshells everywhere AND in the rpc because I was connection deprived and needed everyone to love me, which led to nefarious people taking advantage and hurt me further. (that’s a post for another day.)

Now here’s the main problem: I’m so angry I want to hurt someone. Not physically, but in every other way. It doesn’t matter who you are, I just want to lash out, whoever you are, friend or otherwise. An example: a friend made a new original character that is actually perfectly fine and pretty good, it’s a great OC! — but inside all I want to do is destroy that break their love for the OC and ruin it for them. Just… because. And that’s NOT okay. The good news is that I see it, I realize it. Which is why I have isolated myself. None of my friends deserve this. But I am angry. I am enraged, because I feel I’ve lost most of my life ‘fixing’ myself until I masked so hard I didn’t even realize until it slipped at 28. I know exactly when it slipped too.

Also, considering the kind of world we live in, I feel like I’ve lived past the mid-mark of my life. I’m not sure I’ll live up to 50 at this point. And it’s not fair. It’s not fair at all that I had to go through all this and still suffer. So yes, I’m very angry. But I also don’t WANT to hurt anyone. Especially not the people I care for… This is why I have not been on disco.rd. I have removed FB (because I wanted to for a long time tho lol ), tiktok… And have mostly removed myself from public spaces.

If you have pointers or ideas on how to get past that anger, please, please share. I don’t really know what to do with it. I don’t know how to tame it. And it scares me tbh. I don’t want to be like this. This isn’t me… but it’s so hard not to be angry…

So… yah: if I don’t respond on disco or otherwise, or not right away, it’s not you, I’m the one stepping away so I won’t say something I really don’t mean just for the sake of harming someone because I can’t accept what has been done to me.

If you read this far, thank you. Otherwise, here’s the jinx of it:

tldr; I was officially diagnosed with ADHD and realized I’ve been treated terribly by my peers because of it and shunned away when I asked for help, so now I’m extremely angry at everything and want to hurt someone (anyone) though I don’t really want to. How do I get over this?

[rosetheex-editor]

[Video transcript begin.]

[The transcript begins from a bedroom floor, someone can be heard hammering nails into something. Before propping the phone up to show a metal torso, with one arm. And a lady sitting on the floor. The woman doesn't speak but a voice is heard in the background.]

?: Rose? How long have you been up?

[Voice identified: Henry.]

[The other person responds with something out of frame, causing Henry to gasp.]

H: ROSE YOU HAVEN'T SLEPT? YOU SHOULD HAVE ISN'T PR COMING OVER TODAY?

[A sharp knock can be heard, along with giggling.]

[The other person speaks pointing at the metal torso. Her voice sounding like it was put through a cheese grater.]

R: h- hide buddy…

H: Yep.

[Rose grabs the phone and slowly gets up, grabbing two crutches before moving to the door.]

R: o- ow… my throat…

[Rose opens the door slowly.]

[Behind the door stands a group of women. All smiling. Ness is there with the leader, who happens to also be the tallest.]

?: OMG! Hey girl!

[Voice identified: Ophelia.]

R: tall…

?: Yeah… she's very tall and a lesbian… Brain why?

[Voice identified: Ness.]

R: n- nobody in… pr is straight.

O: Damn straight! I mean. Um. Damn gay!

[Ophelia giggles, the volume of her voice increasing. Seemingly by accident.]

O: So! May I come in?

?: Before you do, can I just say, Rose. Your voice sounds like shit.

[Voice identified: Eden.]

O: Eden! Be nice!

R: hi… evely-

[Rose cuts herself off, Ness looking worried by the second.]

R: eden.

Ed: Yeah. Thanks for getting it right this time.

[Eden clacks her teeth together, showing off the fangs that had sunk into Rose’s arm just over a month ago.]

R: t- that reminds me…

[Rose lifts her arm into frame, slowly removing the bandages and showing the scar to the PR members and Ness.]

R: s- still alive bitch

?: Woah! Eden, you can just. Give scars like that now? Awesome!

[Voice registered, awaiting name…]

Ed: Oh, shut up, Becky!

[Name registered: Becky.]

Be: Fine! We’ll be talking about this later though. That’s cool as fuck!

R: not so… c- cool when you’re in a hospital bed… f- for almost a month.

Ed: I’d do it again in a heartbeat, dicknips.

R: a- and i'd be happy to bash… y- your fuckin head in bitchlips.

O: Okay, I totally love mixing swears together as much as the next gal, but we have a few things to work out, don’t we?

R: eden… isn't coming in.

Ne: Rose just.

R: Eden. i- isn't. coming. i- in.

Ed: I didn’t want to, anyway. Lived here for weeks, I’ve seen enough.

[Before anyone can delay her entry any longer, Ophelia steps in, grabbing Ness and Becky, pulling them in after her. Her grip on Ness’ arm is tighter than her grip on Becky’s hand.]

Ne: OW! Ophelia my arm-

O: So! Where’s Adam? I’ve been so curious about him since I heard about the little guy!

R: d- don't know. nice dress tho-

[Rose is cut off by Henry screaming and a cat meowing.]

H: MY TOE!!!!

R: i- ignore him. nice dress ophelia.

O: Aw! Thank you! I actually… Oh, where is my bag! Adelia? Where’s my suitcase?

[A distant voice is heard, presumably Adelia.]

Ad: Right here girl! Sorry, I had some trouble with it.

[A suitcase is rolled into the apartment. Ophelia grabs it and opens it up. Revealing a ton of shopping bags.]

O: I felt bad about taking Ness out of the country without permission. So I got you some things to make up for it!

[Ophelia beams at Rose. Almost eerily. But the rest of her face and tone is friendly.]

R: n- none of this is gonna… spy on me right?

O: Of course not!

R: a- and speaking of ness… i… s- see y'all gave her… a b- bit of a makeover?

O: Yep! She bought that on her own, though. Amazing what a Showfall company card can buy you!

[Rose turns to only face Ness, She has on a long purple dress with red roses, a red bow is placed on her short green hair. as well a fancy necklace is placed around her neck.]

R: y- you good ness?

Ne: Oh yeah! They took care of me, don't worry! Right Ophelia?

O: For sure! Yeah! Ness was a great addition to girls night.

R: d- don't hurt her and… m- maybe if you want she can tag-

[Rose is cut off by another scream, causing her to scream in return.]

R: GIVE ME A MINUTE!

[Rose coughs.]

R: keep her safe… she c- can tag along again i guess… just don't hurt her.

O: Of course, Rose. Why would we ever hurt her?

H: ROSE IT’S ON MY FOOT!

R: give me a minute!

Ne: Wait what's on henry's-

[Rose sets her phone on a counter in a way everyone is visible, before running off.]

Ne: -foot.

O: She’s nice!

[Ophelia elbows Ness, a smug grin on her face.]

Ne: Ow! what was that for!

[Ness laughs, clearly joking.]

O: You’ve gotta shoot your shot, girl!

Ne: WHA- I- UM-

[Ness' face turns a bright red, she hides it in her arms.]

Ne: I… was already gonna do that actually.

O: Well hurry it up, buttercup! You’re going to lose her to some other girl if you don’t act fast!

Ne: I WAS GONNA DO IT TONIGHT-

[Ness cuts herself off before falling to the ground, As soon as that happens A brick comes flying through the window being caught by Ophelia. Attached is a piece of paper.]

[Ophelia stares at it, before showing it to Ness.]

O: Look. Seems like your secret admirer wants to give you a gift.

Ne: 'You won't get the chance, you'll lose your head'? What the fuck?

O: Oh well. Doesn’t matter.

[Ophelia grabs the note and shoves it into her mouth. Swallowing it.]

Ne: God… I really hope y'all find this person… But um yeah… I was gonna give Rose a literal Rose tonight and do this whole thing…

O: Awww! That's so adorbs! Let’s get this wrapped up so you can go do that, eh?

[Rose can be heard sighing.]

R: s- sorry… a project of mine… f- fell on henry's foot.

Ne: IS HE OK???

R: y- yeah… laying with luna right now.

Be: Hate to interrupt. But… Adam? Can we see him?

[A man sneaks far behind the women, fire extinguisher in hand.]

Be: And Leon, you can put the fire extinguisher down.

?: How the fuck?

[Voice identified: Leon.]

Be: Hey! These enhancements aren’t just for show!

[She motions to her mechanical antennae.]

R: ugh… I'll get him. he's not moving though.

O: Wonderful, bring him here.

[Rose slowly walks out of frame, returning after almost a minute with Adam.]

R: h- here… j- just don't hurt him.

[Before Ophelia can take the arm, a robotic voice rings out through the apartment.]

?: CALIBRATION COMPLETE.

[Voice identified: Adam.]

O: Oh?

R: ADAM?

A: VIRUS WIPED. POWERING ON.

[The arm whirs into motion. Moving each individual part one at a time. Before turning to face Ophelia.]

R: ADAM OH MY GOD YOUR BAC-

[Rose's voice stops as she enters a coughing fit, coughing blood visible on her bottom lip.]

A: You.

O: Hm?

[Adam lunges at Ophelia, wrapping himself around her neck. She yelps in surprise.]

R: a- adam no! stop!

[Ness tries to remove Adam only to fail.]

R: ADAM GET OFF!

[Rose coughs some more.]

Ne: ADAM ROSE IS HURT! GET SOME WATER!

[Ophelia laughs, seemingly unaffected by Adam’s attack. Until he curls the tips of his fingers inwards, and she stops laughing. Instead grabbing for the base of the prosthetic.]

R: DON'T HURT HI-

[Rose coughs even more.]

Ne: Adam now!

[Ophelia yanks the arm off of her neck, red now dripping from a few spots down onto her dress, she pouts a little, and holds Adam away from her.]

R: d- DON'T YOU DAR-

[Rose makes a noise that barely sounds human, Ness turns pale and starts screaming at the people in the room.]

Ne: I'LL GET THE FIRST AID KIT ONE OF Y'ALL JUST GET HER SOME WATER!

[Ness runs out of the room.]

O: Now, what was that for?

A: You know. Bitch.

R: a- adam… what are you talking about…

A: PR. Virus.

[Ophelia rolls her eyes. And stares at Adam, smiling slightly.]

O: You’re upset about that? Jeez, dude! Way to hold a fuckin’ grudge!

R: adam. bat.

[Rose slowly stands up, using her hand to wipe the blood from her mouth.]

O: Don’t.

R: w- what's stopping me?

A: Me. Sit. I need to. Converse.

R: f- fine…

A: Thank you.

O: I feel a little goofy holding you up like this. Can I put you down or are you going to attack me again?

A: Please place me down.

O: Alright.

[The arm is set down, Ophelia tilts xer head at him.]

A: Why.

O: Why what?

A: Why put the virus. In there.

O: Buddy, I don’t know the reasoning, I’m not the one who did it.

A: Caused me to hurt. People. Immensely. Why would you do that.

O: I’m trying to think like Cass, here. A distraction? But from what? Hm. Yeah, I have no clue.

R: j- just a guess… m- maybe from… eden

O: Maybe. But you don’t have to say her name with such disgust, Rose. That’s mean. She was just doing her job, you know.

R: i… t- trusted her… t- thought of her like m- maybe a sibling… a- and she put me in the… h- hospital for almost a month.

O: That’s on you for doing that, girl. There were tons of people warning you. I remember seeing all of that and sweating bullets, but you just wouldn’t believe them.

R: i… i g- guess i've always… d- done that…

O: Mhm. You need to trust people way less. I learned that the hard way 75 years ago. Anyway. Adam. I have no idea what to tell you, dude.

A: Liar.

O: Hm.

[She leans in, and whispers something that the phone can’t pick up. Her volume lowering to a near silence. Despite being metal, Adam seems to tense up.]

A: I hope you explode.

O: Alright, man. Uh, so… can I get some water? Please? If you wouldn’t mind.

[A friendly smile can be seen plastered on her face, she looks directly at Rose. For just a second too long. And then looks back at her suitcase.]

O: Oh! Right! Gifts! Hold on, I’ll get them out!

[Rose continues coughing, out of frame enough where it isn't visible what's happening. She speaks, her voice now even more messed up.]

R: f- fine. g- get a glass… g- get the tupperware of food… too.

O: Alright!

[Ophelia bends down to rummage through the suitcase with one arm, and the other extends over to the cupboard, which is fairly far away, and out of frame. The tap can be heard turning on. A few moments later, it turns off, and her arm retracts with a glass of water in hand.]

Be: I keep forgetting you can do that. Scares the shit out of me every time.

O: Ha! Yeah, sorry, Becks! Now, where did I put that…

[Ophelia pulls out a few bags. And hands them to Rose, not getting up.]

O: Open it! I made sure to get you something you’d like.

R: g- give me a second…

[Rose seemingly points at something out of frame.]

O: Do you need help cleaning that up? I’m an expert, you know. I’d be happy to clear all of that up for you.

R: w- we have a mop… w- where? uhhhhhh s- shit where did dad… put the mop…

[Ophelia looks at Rose for a few seconds, her expression softening for a small moment, before snapping right back into place. xe gets up and starts looking for the mop.]

R: d- don't worry about it… j- just… i- I'll open the bags…

[Rose opens the bags one by one, pulling out multiple shirts and jackets. Each one looking as if they were taken from the 80s and 90s, many of them having pastel colors. Rose sets them back in the bag before slowly standing up.]

R: t- thanks… i guess…

O: Do you like them? I really hope you do, I’d feel terrible if they weren’t to your liking.

R: i… like them…

[Rose coughs again, this time the blood falling from her mouth is visible. As Ness walks back into frame.]

Ne: Hey adam. Uh Ophelia I got the first aid kit.

O: Thanks!

[Zey extend their arm to Ness, grabbing the first aid kit, and retracting it back. Beginning to bandage her neck.]

O: Today’s visit has been wonderful, thank you for having me over!

Ne: Um… Did anyone get Rose water? Like I asked?

O: I took care of it, don’t worry.

[Rose drops to the floor again, the coughing continuing.]

R: s- son of a BITCH!

Be: Ooooh. That doesn't look good. Does she have tuberculosis? We have a bit of experience with that. Remember when Cass had it? That wasn’t fun.

Ne: No um… I actually don't know…

R: n- none of your business… j- just know s- showfall t- tried and f- failed… t- to get me back…

O: Hm. Ness, keep an eye on her, not like you haven’t been, but… yeah.

Ne: I mean… It probably doesn't help that she screamed bloody murder for god knows how long… When Edgar… Y'know and um…

O: We should get going, but before we do, I have another thing for you guys!

[Xe takes another bag out, and places it on the counter, closing her suitcase. Before rummaging around and grabbing a tupperware container. She takes a step towards the door.]

Ne: What's that?

O: We forgot you didn’t have your ears pierced… so we got these. They’re real diamonds, by the way. So don’t lose them!

Ne: Huh?

Be: Ophelia, you can tell them upfront!

O: But that’s no fun!

Be: Ugh. We got you diamond earrings, but we forgot you don’t have your ears pierced. So we had to get you the necklace.

Ne: Oh um…

[Rose can be heard seemingly talking to herself.]

R: m- mai… y- you really couldn't wire anything right… i said that outloud…

O: That’s a little deeper than I want to go today! There’s a few more pieces of jewelry in there, too. Just as a fun treat. Some of that stuff is from my own jewelry box!

Ne: Oh um… Thanks!

O: Only the best for our very own honorary PR member! Now, we should really get going, have fun, you two!

[With that, the PR members finally leave the apartment, their giggling can be heard retreating down the hall, along with a few giddy shrieks. Possibly from gossip. They finally fade. Leon stands up straight, having been crouched in the corner for the whole visit.]

Le: ‘Honorary PR member’? Ness. You have some explaining to do.

Ne: I know I know! Right now can one of y'all get Rose her medicine while I find the mop?

Le: Alright. [Aside.] Coast is clear! Y’all can come out now!

[Leon goes to rummage through some cabinets while Liam and Katherine emerge from a room.]

R: h- hi… m- mom… l- liam…

?: Hey, I heard the commotion from in there, are you okay?

[Voice identified: Katherine.]

[Liam waves, but says nothing.]

R: B- besides the blood… and whatever e- else… y- yeah… j- just wish that wasn't one of the side effects from… y'know the night that task m- manager tried to get me back…

K: I know, you’re going to be fine, though. You’re going to have some medicine, and maybe a bit of rest. Alright?

R: a- alright… i w- was… working on buddy all n- night so…

Ne: [Distant.] Who the fuck is "Buddy"?

R: r- robot me and henry a- are… w- working on for sparrow…

[Katherine walks over and picks up Adam.]

K: You’ve caused a lot of panic in this apartment, you know.

A: Do not. Focus on me. Other issues. All software and hardware is in perfect condition.

Le: Found it!

[Leon walks back into frame and hands something to Rose.]

R: t- thanks…

[Rose takes something out of the bottle, presumably medicine.]

R: s- soda?

Le: Won’t the carbonation hurt your throat?

R: d- damnit… kool-aid?

Le: Yeah, of course. I can do that.

[Leon walks back out of frame. Just as Liam walks over with a piece of paper.]

R: 'I’m g- glad the blond one wasn’t here. b- but I don’t like that any of them were in here in the first place… t- they killed my dad. I d- don’t like them'… i k- know liam… i k- know…

Ne: [Distant.] Sorry about all of that by the way…

[Without saying anything, Liam hugs Rose. Then retreats back into his room.]

R: i… feel so b- bad for l- liam… g- god…

Le: Yeah. He’s just a kid. He hasn’t even graduated… high school– FUCK WAIT. HE HASN’T BEEN GOING TO SCHOOL.

R: o- oh… fuck…

Le: LIAM. PLEASE TELL ME YOU WERE HOMESCHOOLED OR SOMETHING. PLEASE TELL ME WE HAVEN’T MADE YOU MISS MONTHS OF SCHOOL.

[Liam’s hand pokes out of the room in a thumbs down.]

Le: FUCK! SHIT! WE NEED TO–

K: Leon, calm. It’ll be fine.

R: i n- never got… t- to graduate… a- and i turned out f- fine.

[Liam pokes his head out, a neutral expression on his face. He goes back in and then returns with another note. A linear equation written out on it. He hands it to Rose.]

R: s- seven times five… equals fifteen… um… um…

Le: Rose.

R: Um… x equals… um…

[Liam grabs the paper, and writes something down on it. Showing it to Rose.]

R: I WOULD’VE GOTTEN IT!

[Rose coughs again.]

R: ow.

[Liam shakes his head, then walks over to Leon, the two of them having a conversation via Liam’s paper. It fades into the background.]

[Ness runs in with the mop and a bucket.]

Ne: Katherine I'm really sorry about PR coming in I swear on m-

[Ness cuts herself off.]

Ne: On Mari's mother. I didn’t mean for any of that!

K: It’s fine. We’re just mad that you let them take you to the fucking Bahamas without even CHECKING IN FIRST.

Ne: In my defense. Alcohol blood loss and 5 hours of sleep do NOT mix well.

K: The hell even happened on that trip?

Ne: Apparently I sang 'Copacabana' on top of a table… Uh I don't remember much else.

K: I’m going to guess we’ll get a detailed description from one of them on that blog.

Ne: Yeah probably… Um…

[Ness shows Katherine her hand, missing ring finger and all.]

Ne: That happened.

[Katherine shrieks, grabbing Ness’ arm and inspecting it.]

K: What the fuck did they do? Was this during the trip? Is it infected?

Ne: Me and Eden got in a fight in the park. I'll explain if you ask. No. And also no.

Le: Oh yeah! There was a transcript!

[Katherine turns to where Leon’s voice was heard from, a look of disbelief on her face.]

K: This is why you shouldn’t confiscate my phone, LEON. I would’ve liked to know about that!

Le: Sorry!

Ne: I did more damage to her than she did to me… Stabbed her with a spear and almost broke her nose.

K: Your finger is missing! We– hold on, what's in that bag on the counter? Have you opened it yet?

Ne: No? But Ophelia said it was filled with jewelry.

K: I… we should open it, I think.

[She grabs the bag and opens it after walking back over to Ness. She yelps, and nearly drops the whole thing. Shoving the bag into Ness’ hands.]

Ne: What?

[Ness looks in the bag and slowly turns her head.]

Ne: Oh… There’s my finger…

Le: Guess it’s not missing, then! Sorry.

K: Of course they’d do that.

[A loud metal crash coming from one of the rooms, followed by a cat meowing.]

H: [Distant.] Buddy fell again!

Ne: WE'RE BUSY!

K: HENRY GET YOUR ASS OUT HERE. NESS IS MISSING A FINGER.

H: BUDDY FELL ON MY FOOT I CAN'T WALK!

K: IT CAN’T BE THAT FUCKING HEAVY, CAN IT?

R: t- torso is like… a foot tall i think? and made of three inch thick metal… s- so yes it can.

K: Henry, you’re weak as fuck. You can walk. Don’t make me drag you out here.

[Henry walks into frame with a limp, His hair is messed up and his eyes are red.]

H: What?

K: Ness is missing a fucking finger!

H: Oh god damnit… Ness what school jock did you piss off this time?

Ne: I DIDN'T PISS OFF A JOCK THIS TIME! EDEN BIT IT OFF! Damn you get into one-

[Henry cuts Ness off with a cough.]

H: You went to the school nurse almost every day FOR A WHOLE SCHOOL YEAR! fighting the school football team. It was more than one.

Le: I had a friend like that back in the 80s!

K: Who?

Le: … Do I really need to say.

R: d- dad?

Le: Yeah, it was always something with that guy. One time he broke a water fountain after tripping into it. They gave him ice and he was back in class within 30 minutes.

Ne: Sounds like edgar. Anyway this is nothing! One time one of the members of the school football team hit me so hard into a locker, Like three of my ribs cracked!

K: Ness you’re missing a finger.

Ne: I still have nine more!

K: God, you guys are impossible! Since you won’t take your injury seriously, let’s change the damn topic before I bite one of them off. What day did you say those tickets were for?

Ne: The 28th? O H S H I T-

R: i- I'll get changed… e- end the transcript. wait… that's not the command…

Le: Wh– did you have one going on PURPOSE?

R: n- nope. i just know it's recording… b- because when the fuck is it not?

A: On. it.

[Adam skitters up to the phone.]

A: Goodbye chat.

[Transcript end.]

[mulberrysilk]

Your Geto fic is amazing 🥺 I was thinking how would Bounded!Geto react if reader hears whispers of her not doing her “wife” duties because she still hasn’t produced a heir in their first year of marriage. We all know stress makes it difficult to procreate so just to him be reassuring 🥺

omg thank uu 🥺💕 that means a lot! And omg that idea tho! Ahhhh I can see that happening with how devoted his followers are to him afgshsd I have to write a little sumthing about ittt REEEE

BOUNDED | additional drabbles

Geto Suguru x reader

cw: pregnancy, kinda angsty, but Fluff!!!, Mimiko and Nanako being the cutest bb gurls, sweet, loving, Geto.

a/n: also I used Hatsuharu from FB to portray the first commander to Geto cause uhh that’s what came to mind. It’s the deep voice and usually deadpan expression I guess AHAHA

A lot can happen in year. More than you can count and get what stood out the most was the unexpected love that blossomed between you and your husband. To this very day he still made your heart flutter whenever he gazed at you, touched you and smile at you. You refused to imagine a life without Geto, and he too felt the same.

You, his other half, his partner, the Queen to his King, was the pillar of the family you created. Without you, an important part of his legacy to come wouldn’t be feasible. From across the main tatami room, his seat was situated in the elevated part of the room, five staircase steps to be able to greet him and providing him a view of his followers, his gaze lingered to the opened shoji doors. The newfound pieces of his heart sat by the small zen garden. Mimiko and Nanako were giggling away at the fairy pop up book on Mimiko’s lap while you busied yourself with braiding their hair. The home he vowed to protect.

Once the meeting was over, the people dispersed and soft chatter began to echo the halls of the estate. Usually right after it’s over, Geto would leave you and the girls but he needed to check in with his commanders, and as he passed with his first commander following right behind him, the whispers from his followers reached his ears without their knowledge.

“It’s been a year and Geto-sama’s wife still isn’t with child,” one of them hushed to the other.

“It must be such a shame to her family. That was her only use from what I heard.”

“She’s lucky to even have some cursed energy.”

“Geto-sama needs an heir. What if the marriage was just a front?”

Geto’s smile masked his agitation. Did they think that low of you? Would they like to experience first hand the wrath of his-

“Geto-sama. Would you like me to silence them?” The deep voice of his first commander sounded.

Only then did Geto noticed his hands were clenched in fists.

“It’s fine Hatsuharu,” he raided a hand to dismiss the idea. “Although,” he paused, finding you at the main entrance of the estate with the other women, your hands occupied with holding Mimiko and Nanako’s hands, their little heads staring up at the other adults. “A husband should honour his wife. What kind of husband would I be to allow such words to be said about my wife? Words from my own followers none the less.”

“I’m in your command,” Hatsuharu bowed his head with reverence.

“I’m feeling kind…let them off with a warning and let them be an example to others who might speak such words of my wife again.” His smile returned as he passed the group who had been gossiping about you, their heads bowing while Hatsuharu no longer followed him.

Even as Geto was listening to reports, he couldn’t remove the irritation itching at the back of his neck. Were they really bothered about that? Sure it has been a year and not only were they anxious to how you weren’t pregnant, he was too but the love that had grown within him drowned those anxieties. Who were they to question? Who were they to say such words about you?

It was annoying. It was almost unbearable. But he bore with it.

Crickets sounding in the night and the whistle of soft wind, brought comfort and peace with each step he took home, the home he shared with you. His sanctuary. But as he approached he heard the girls screaming and it had been a long while since his heart had raced this fast. A while since panic possessed him.

Rushing past the main door and to the living area that looked out the garden, his heart drummed in his ears. What happened? Were they here? Have they found him? The girls. You. This can’t be happening, he chanted to himself, sliding the shoji doors open, yellow light flooding the garden.

“Suguru?”

Eyes wide and frantic, breaths rushed and sheen of cold sweat dripping down his forehead, he finally saw you.

On your knees with your hands on your lap, hair down and wearing the silk robe you’d wear when before bed, your own eyes were wide briefly before your brows knitted at the sight of your husband.

“Geto-sama?” The small heads of Nanako and Mimiko peaked out of the blanket of the kotatsu.

Safe.

The remaining pieces of his heart were safe.

“Are you alright Suguru?” You shifted to move but with a raise of his hand, he stopped you.

He took a deep breath, relief slowly sinking in at he sight of his family.

“Are you okay Geto-sama?” “What happened Geto sama?” Mimiko and Nanako tilted their cute heads to the left in unison.

“I-,” he paused, pacing his breaths. He gulped down air like a man in drought. “I heard screaming.”

A flustered expression came over you when it dawned upon you what brought about the state he was in, and it made your heart ache.

“Suguru, we’re fine. The girls were just happy…” you explained, crawling towards him, still stood in the openness of the garden. “Come inside, it’s cold and the tea is still warm.”

“Whats got them so happy they screamed?” He questioned, stepping into the living room and closing the shoji doors behind him, the warmth of home enveloping him. “It scared me.” He admitted.

The two girls shuffled out of the kotatsu and dashed to Suguru, their lips in a pout as they embraced him, apologising for scaring him and that they didn’t mean to scare him. He patted their heads telling them that it was fine, embracing them before they cried.

“I told them not to get too worked up over it,” you murmured, your fingers fiddling with each other.

“But it’s still good news!” Nanako chirped.

“Yeah! Good news!” Her twin echoed, both girls beaming up at their father.

“Am I going to be kept guessing what these news are or…” he easily returned to his playful nature with the children.

“THERE’S A BABY IN Y/N-SAMA!” They announced, high pitched squeals making his ear ring a little and they began to run around happily in the room the same screams he heard sounding again. “A BABY! A BABY! A BABY!”

The shock couldn’t fully freeze him. Not with the little gentle tug at his sleeve that you had given, your gaze down on your lap.

“It was just a home test…there’s a chance that it’s not…”

Your voice was trembling, so soft that he wanted nothing more than to hold you. Did it bother you that much that it hasn’t taken yet? The glistening tear the dripped from your face answered his query and in an instant, he held you in his arms.

“If it is then I’m blessed, if it isn’t, we can always try again,” he kissed the crown of your head, your face buried in his chest.

The girls had stopped running and now knelt beside the two of you, their joyous expressions replaced with worry.

“Isn’t having a baby a good thing? Why is Y/N-sama crying?” Mimiko’s lips trembled, close to tears.

“It is a good thing,” Geto reassured with a smile. “Your mother over here is just worried. Having a child is not as easy as one thinks.”

“For sure there’s a baby inside!” Nanako huffed. “I could feel it!”

The sound of their voices soothed the worry that suffocated your chest and you were able to put on a small smile for the girls.

“Feel it?” He chuckled, ruffling her hair which made her pout further.

“There’s a baby. I’m sure of it.”

“Yeah!” Mimiko cheered. “And if we’re right, Geto-sama has to get Mama crepes!”

“Are you sure the crepes are for Y/N or for you two?” He teased, the two turning pink before giggling behind their hand.

And to Geto’s delight, his girls were right (they also got their crepes).

[yostresswritinggirl]

Antinomy

Part 2; things are brewing. VIBE

“Do you know the spiritual meaning of 11? What about in numerology? You’ll find it quite intriguing, funny even… until it starts making sense.” You’ve witnessed and harnessed the way and days he had grown to be; this fic enumerates the trials of the 11th before he became a Harbinger under your care. From strangers to mentor to friends to love- Childe made a grave mistake, now you’re once again strangers.

Pairing -> Childe x Harbinger!Fem!Reader

Word Count -> 5217

Themes -> Friends to admirers, mentor, fluffy, suddenly ANGST

Series -> #Sojourner Specials (600 Followers Event) Part 1

Warning -> Blood and injury

Maybe it was stubbornness, his unhinged desire for the thrill of a fight, or you mistaken misguidance. Many possibilities, really, but Childe knows it had nothing to do with all of those. You're not to blame for his mistakes, but he sure as hell would have to pay for the mess he just created.

vi. fontaine

The show felt like a dance made to lure and trance such audience, and despite his resolve and difference in agendas, the strong Harbinger had been victim to the beauty of the show. Of swaying thin clothes and alluring flicks of the hips.

“We’re not co-workers, we don’t know each other, remember that.”

Tambourines and lyres synced through the performance as men and women alike cheered and stumbled to the songs. The Snezhnayan dancers set the bar high in terms of beauty as the Fatui disguised as performers indulged the crowd in symphony and dance, as if the whole nation was under a mania, no one saw and no one heard. They just followed lead as the agents lulled their own targets into a sense of security and joy.

In the middle of the crowd you lead the choreography as the main dancer, distinguished by the colors of your garb and its grandiosity, yet still respectably covered compared to the other performers. Your main objective was to catch the havoc of a man that left the headquarters of your organization in flames at his wake; and yet, it was instead Childe that was allured to your spell.

An intoxicated man had been eyeing your behind with drooling eyes for a while now, and with the assistance of liquid courage, he reached his hand out to get a feel- when it landed on gray pants of firmness. “Oh my, I didn’t know you swing that way, citizen,” you whipped around to see Childe directly behind you, who was also has his head angled to look behind him where a Fontaine man stumbled back in disgust. His hand clutched to his chest as if it were burned. “Sad news tho, I’m off the table, try someone else maybe.”

Before you can register the edge in his voice, he was already guiding you by the hand back to your dancing stride. You were momentarily stunned but devolved into a glare at his current recklessness, “Come now, Lady Viscaria.” He addressed you by your dancer name. “The whole world is high in the clouds around us, this would be a moment no one will remember.” You didn’t even need to look to know he was right, and you succumbed with a sigh.

Childe didn’t realize just how small your hands are compare to his, the softness of it in contrast to the rough texture of his gloves. If he knew, if only he knew, he would have removed them before you had entertained the idea. Your steps were lithe and your turns were grace manifested, eyes closed yet a gentle smile equipped on your face, the ones you had been wearing ever since you started the performance. “So this is how you fight.” He mumbled with his own grin when he had spun you back against his form, your feet glides against the pavement yet barely touching it as you seemingly floated to place. If he hadn’t known better he would have thought you were an Anemo Vision wielder.

Soon enough the square dissipated to give way to the ferocious dance you two had eased into. Steps became more pointed, arms tensed and strong, and the turns was almost reminiscent of martial arts as you seemingly evade each other’s swings. Suddenly a kick aimed to hit his chest forced him to jump back, and at the other side you dropped your foot, a taunting smirk and a condescending gaze set upon him. His blue eyes widened.

And the elegance of the tango from earlier turned into a vicious round of capoeira, powerful kicks and jumps yet not made to touch each other. Your figure leaped into a crescent kick when he had made a sweep to hit your ankles, him immediately rolling to the side to evade the blow. Dropping to the ground with your ankles and knees bent, a leg outstretched you gasped, and went into a running start towards him, “Lift!” A single command yet he knew what he needed to do.

Gripping your hips upon your leap his strong arms easily eased you high up, your legs were kicked high up and one bent farther back and you steadied yourself by gripping on to his shoulders. The atmosphere turned tense and the only sound you can hear were the ragged breaths you heave up close. And the crowd around then explodes into a round of applause.

Childe seemed to have snapped out of a trance from the foreign noise, breaking the eye contact you both held as he slowly placed you down. There was a sudden bashfulness to him then. But was once again pulled away from his reverie when you quite literally pulled him out of the square into a dark alley, eyes glinting dangerously as a toothy smirk donned your lips, “I saw him, the redhead.”

...

The chains felt sentient. As it flies forward to try and capture him, Childe conjured a wave to sweep it away only for it to change angles to strike at him again. It pierced through the pavement he was once on before it moved to retract back to the owner. At the other side, Childe had a glimpse of your more successful fight with the fugitive as your polearm easily deflected the advances of the chains, even if it gets caught sometimes. Your Cryo Vision would always make quick work of freezing and breaking the chains.

None of you expected a non-elemental fight, and this seemed more complicated of a battle than you would have thought. The man carried with him the aura you feel when you use your delusion, you grimly thought as you ducked out of another barrage, sensing the frustration and desperation of the enemy. You were barely breaking a sweat, you’d see his red eyes take notice, and you weren’t even using both of your hands to fight. With another smirk, your Vision then glowed by your side as you raised your arm. The hooded man braced for impact, but instead he felt a force hit his lower half- water current from Childe, and suddenly it solidified to ice upon your avalanche. His hand where the strange device were also covered to render him useless.

An arrow and a spear’s tip was now aimed to his heart. “Well, well, that was a nice fight, Ragnvindr,” you leaned down close enough to see the finer details of his hawk mask, you saw his eyes squint into a glare. He knows he lost. By your side Childe relaxed his arms and dematerialized his bow, the next part should be yours to work on. “Thank you for your dedication, but this atrocity ends now.” You straightened your back and took a step back, angling your spear to his throat. As his eyes close to succumb to death, your head would angle itself slightly to see Childe’s reaction

when a golden flicker appeared past his shoulder.

“CHILDE!” The devil himself felt the air leave his lungs at the force that punched at his chest, enough to immobilize him as he was punted to the ground. Before he could even recover, the pavement around shifted and crumbled to create a wall between him and the frozen Diluc. He heard the ice breaking and two pairs of feet scrambling away. “Fuck, he had an accomplice,” he breathed as he took his stand, about to give chase to the escapees. That is until he registered his mentor-

barely standing with a stalagmite pierced through her stomach.

“Chi...lde.” You gripped the pointed tip of the structure to keep yourself up as your legs started to lose feeling. He was there hovering over you, unsure where to touch or how to assist. Fuck. Fuck. This was his fault. “Go... chase, I’ll be- I’ll be fine...”

And then you blacked out.

vii. seven correspondence

There were multiple parchment of the same color littering his office desk filled with different lengths of paragraphs. Childe's quarters in the palace was cozy and wide, and nothing could be heard but the sound of his fountain pen scratching the surface of the paper with ease.

"Letters are important in Snezhnaya," you perked up from your unfocused gaze from his window, where you silently watched the brewing blizzard manifesting outside. Your eyes made contact with his genuinely gentle ones that still lingered at the task at hand, "why not write one?"

"Letters are commonplace in Snezhnaya," you corrected as you made your way to his side to snoop in his letters. He did not seem to mind. After all you'd pretty much already the whole of his family that one awkward encounter. He was working on the seventh letter and your eyes lingered around the six finished ones: there was one for each younger siblings, one meant for the two older brothers, another for the older sister, and one for his parents. "It's not necessary for me to write, I don't have an address in mind to begin with."

Is that so, he mumbled under his breath before the conversation died down once again to little scratches. A lot of his words had tales to tell about his stay in Fontaine, you realized the most details were poured into the contents for his parents. At the mention of this nation, your hand ghosts over your stomach.

The bandages from long ago had already been dispatched. And yet the stiffness of it has still affected your composure as well as the weird pull of the skin from the stitches. Only a nasty scar was left in its wake to remind you of the failed encounter and it forced you to make drastic wardrobe changes to your performing attire.

You saw Childe's shoulders slightly tense at your action.

"Childe," his grip on the pen tightened yet he kept his head down. You didn't mind. His mind was going overdrive again, probably. "Who are you writing that last letter for?"

He felt like he'd dodged an arrow over the way he had relaxed, slumped down even when he met eyes with better resolution within it. "It's for a special someone," his signature smile was back, "I've met her long ago and I've always made sure to send her a letter yearly as thanks."

Thanks? "Thanks?" The letter (it was short, you realized) was already folded before you could peek at the words within. You knew Childe was good-looking, but for him to have a girlfriend waiting for years as he drowns in his work, quite irrational and yet painful. Painful... to you?

"I've met a girl back when I was 14," he was suddenly up and bustling as he bundled up his letters. Urgent you followed to listen to his tale as best as you can with his long legs. "I never knew her name or her face, but she saved me from the wolves back in Morepesok. I never properly gave her my thanks, so yearly I would leave letters at the woods where she'd gone, and hope that she'll be able to read them and know that I lived because of her." You already halted your advances to chase after him as you stood before the doors of the Palace. He didn't seem to mind, he kept going until he was gone.

...Morepesok was a seaside fishing village with a vast white forest by the edges in which ferocious wolves and bears usually haunt. After your promotion to the Palace, you had never once set foot in the village, much less the woodland. Where you are right now.

You held a steady hand against your stomach as you retraced the familiar route you'd gone, something so far away you would have expected to forget it by now. That was six years ago, you counted as you reached the clearing in horror of its emptiness, there should be six letters here by now.

A snapping twig had you whirling to look behind you. "So, it really was you." His gentle blue orbs had met your widened ones, breathless you both were, but for different reasons.

"So you lied about the letters," the mocking pout on your lips had made him laugh. A sprinkle of red dusts his cheeks, and he was quick to hide it with the familiar letter on his hand.

"I didn't lie about this one," your upturned palms received the crispy envelope, carefully opening the seal and unfolding its contents, "I wanted to make sure I was right."

'Your sacrifice had given me a new chance, a new life, a new beginning. I wish I was there to thank you for protecting me, but this time, I will get stronger and make sure-'

"I'll be the one protecting you from now on." He finished, and the red dust over your own cheeks felt like torches made to melt the mightiest icicles.

viii. fleeting glances

Signora had always been the type of person to only make appearances when necessary, but most of her dirty work were done by her subordinates, her own little army. She's the coordinator and observer at the back as things were weaved into place for her. Like a flower on the wall, the Fair Lady knows and notices details.

The first one was by the entrance, the second was by the veranda. The third, fourth and fifth were by the hallways. The sixth was by the throne room. The seventh was outside. And the eight was that in front of her—

Childe disliked being in the same area or even breathing space as her, this much Signora knew. He was a kid still under training over the ways of the Fatui, but there was nothing more he hated than the way the Fair Lady handles her work, her soldiers. But it came with the aesthetic, and he had no other means to pry until he had finally grasped the way the cogs turn in this organization known as the Fatui.

The youngest Harbinger never looked her directly in the eye or even dare spare her the glance when it was not needed. And in all honesty, it was quite bothersome the first few times. After all, Tartaglia carried with him a certain charm.

His eyes would either narrow or be guarded for any other Harbinger that comes his way, respectful or dismissive, the options fleet through those whenever. But there was one humane and warm look he gives at special occasions, for a special someone, and Signora finally witnessed it in full view and detail—

The crease between his eyebrows would immediately ease as his eyes break free from its squinted, slanted form. The dark depths at the middle would dilate as his expression quirks up, teeth usually visible through parted lips as he dons an easy smile. And Signora would be taken aback by the immediate change as she follows the trail of his stare.

The gold was the first to strike with the way the trinkets hang by the waist, and the warm and mellow colors so contrary to the Fatui colors draws away the unease of onlookers. It was to make sure that no association with the Fatui would be made, that was your calculated explanation was upon your choice of 'uniform.' You've just came from a short trip to Natlan to gather all data to be reported to the Tsaritsa, and during that time the 11th had been under no one's particular care.

You passed by their forms (pass is a strong word, they were off to the far side, honestly) with your report in hand, humming to yourself as you continued your way to the throne room. That demeanor only means that you had good news to tell, good news for everyone.

The glance was gone fast as the moment ended, and his hard look came albeit much lighter this time. But the way Signora smirked signified she'd noticed, and his look only grew stiffer.

"Come now, pretty boy, show that look often."

The Fair Lady's laugh echoed inside the Palace walls as Tartaglia stomps off to where you had gone, to wait after the dusk convention respectfully.

ix. years of employment

Of the many milestones that could have been celebrated, it was done in an odd number at the most peculiar time. Yes, it is no surprise for everyone to know that you had been working for the Fatui for nine whole years now. And honestly, you shouldn't have been surprised that your younger colleague with the weird ways of his Abyss-induced brains, decided that it was time your anniversary be celebrated instead of waiting another year for the double digits mark.

"Please tell me we're not going to your house again," you softly pleaded as Childe continued to guide you through the paths in the main city of Snezhnaya. "As much as I appreciate their caring atmosphere, I'm not too keen on the idea of pretending to be the head honcho of the toy-selling company of Snezhnaya."

To this, Childe guffawed to a boisterous laugh, pulling his hand away from your back to clutch at his convulsing stomach. You pursed your lips in distaste of his reaction, but then it would loosen up to a smile as you watched him still try to catch his breathe.

After that, the trip had continued with only small chatter in between as you descended further to the edges of the city. You haven't been to this area, simply because of the fact that there were no patrols needed around the cityless wasteland where you are headed, and the glint of surprise had fixed a knot at Childe's back. Relief painted his face.

And you found yourself in front of a frozen lake, with hanging lights decorating the leafless trees by it, and a small table filled to the brim with food. "Lady toyseller!" You shot a glare at your student who averted his gaze away easily to focus on his other siblings. This heretic lied—

"Big brother said it's a special occasion! To commemorate your anniversaries for being in the toyselling business!" Your glare died down to a look of confusion, and the family gathered back into a homely atmosphere. So it seems that Childe coincidentally joined the Fatui the same day as you, two years apart. And he said nothing about it.

"We've been celebrating since the last three years, if we had known, you could have been with us!" And with that you were pulled in by Tonia to the table where her mother was, congratulating you for your hardwork and patience as she offers you to taste some of the food they had brought for the picnic.

"I know you've been helping my son ever since he became a Harbinger," you looked up to Childe's mother in wonder as your mouth was currently stuffed with her delicious homemade Pelmeni. She gave a light laugh at the sight of your wide, curious eyes paired with stuffed cheeks. "Childe mentioned how you saved him when he ran away from him..." and the mother continued to spill the details you were never given the chance to hear from the man himself.

You suppose this was the cause of your perfectly crafted aura of trust, to lure in your targets and make them spill to their heart's contents as you indulge them. In the end, Childe's mother's true intention was to thank you for all that you had done for her son, and to help him cultivate into the best person he could be among the ranks of the Harbinger. You gulped the last bits of the dumpling, a shy smile placated on your cheek, "It is my honor to take him under my wing."

"Hey, master, I sure hope mum didn't say anything embarrassing about me while I was gone!" A hand holding a tissue softly wiped the cream at the edge of your lips as Childe- Ajax finally made his way over to your table.

"It's okay, really, it's normal for children to pee their bed." You mused as Childe's mother laughed at the way her son choked over his own spit. Ah, you were right.

The rest of the day was filled with ice-skating, something you have forgotten, clumsily held up by the three younger siblings as they expertly excelled in the field. And right after was a session of ice fishing with their father, who was greatly impressed by your strength upon reeling the 50-centimeter long tuna. Flopping on to the ice platform as if to chase the children on land.

"Don't want to stay? There's a spare room here, you can borrow my big sister's clothes for the night. It's a long way back to the Palace," he stood next to you outside the entrance of his home while you face the other direction.

You sighed. "Tartaglia, I'm your mentor. And as the 10th Harbinger, your ascension should be my priority." You didn't see the way his jaw clenched at the intonations of your words. "If it were a different circumstance-"

"Next week," the snow caught on to your lashes as you closed your eyes, basking at the cold that bites at your cheeks. "Will be my last try. And after that, please see me as your equal."

"Alright." Your hands trembled.

x. final spar

Fatuus lined the veranda surrounding the quadrangle in quiet anticipation, skirmishers and agents alike that had yet to be assigned under Harbinger supervision and even those who just had nothing better to do.

Childe had anticipated the spotlight, but it was a greater scale he was not comfortable on. He was lucky a Harbinger had yet to watch the spar, the last spar as he had promised, and it seemed the gossip had spread enough to alert the whole organization. The Delusion mask sat by the side of his hair as he watched you at the other end of the field.

Your eyes held no emotion as they stared through his soul. A different kind of emotion he'd have wanted to see. He thinks to himself at the thought of you once being in the same predicament as him, did you feel the same fear and worry as he did? Did it take you ten tries? Maybe more, maybe less?

Tartaglia said this will be the last spar, and the final chance for both sides to make it a fair fight (to give it their all). But when you suddenly disappeared and materialized above him with your spear ready to strike, he thought, maybe not this time either.

The spear collided with the dirt floor as blades of winds seem to have exploded from it, a series of gasps resounding through the crowd as they stepped away from the edge. Tartaglia softly landed back on his feet after the successful somersault, materializing his water polearm to strike his elemental slash from the distance. But you stood still, unscathed as the wave that was meant to slice you turned into ice before it could come any closer. Fuck, Tartaglia knew his Vision was weak to yours.

You charged at him once again with the boost of your Anemo delusion, your polearms clashing painfully as you both tried to get hits on each other. There was a nick at this cheek to draw the first blood, your dominant hand twirling the spear easily Tartaglia retreats back to avoid the wildly spinning blade.

Soon enough he dons his own mask and the real fight begins. Electric currents ran through the field as an icy fog starts to envelop the floor, superconduct reaction running the parameter of the field as the Fatuus back away further. The next time your blades meet, a crackle of lightning resounded through the whole palace. Smacking his blades upward, your spear quickly sweeps down to swipe at this ankles, forcing him to leap as the fog obscures the reach of your polearm. Mid-air, he was kicked on the chest as your acrobatic arms held you up and over.

Soon enough his hunger for victory begins to manifest, and his biggest advantage comes into play: overwhelming strength.

Tartaglia felt huge triumph when you finally used both of your hands to parry his blows, your feet sometimes sinking into the dirt floor under the pressure of his attack. For the first time in the fight, your facade cracked with a grimace as you held your polearm up against his dual blades. Quickly leaning away, you brought your foot up and pushed at the spear's shaft, enough to force him back as you leaped out of his range. There was sweat trickling at the back of your neck now, feeling the sizzle of the current on the slight moisture. You swiped your spear in a crescent motion as a snow avalanche bombarded Tartaglia's side when he tried to approach, giving you just enough time to breathe as he tries to free himself under the snow.

By the time he's set himself free, you were already running forwards with your hands gripping your spear at your right for a swiping motion. He fashions his dual blades as he too sprinted in the middle to clash, weapons encased with frost and electricity. In a split second, his arms raised to your left, knowing this was your non-dominant side would make it easy to send you flying at the angle of approach. A powerful blow against another was about to shake the whole Palace—

"Columbina!" The vagrant's voice pierced through the crackle of elements, and Tartaglia's eyes widened when he had noticed your foot slip at the distraction. The inertia of his arms unable to stop the course of action; superconduct and electro-charged reactions creating a powerful explosion as the iced fog seem to have imploded from the force.

Childe's moist hands trembled as his vision tries to refocus. There's a ringing in his ears as he tries to grip at his hands, the electricity coursing through his nerves to make it numb. He desperately closed and opened his fists, and when he finally settled his sights straight, the dripping red liquid had splattered all the way to his mask and arms. With hesitation his sights followed the trail of blood and frost splayed across the field barely visible as the mist still covered the floor with a thin veil, his steps halted at the sound of glass crunching underneath his shoes, and he didn't need to look to know what it was.

"GET THE MEDIC NOW, PREPARE THE INTENSIVE CARE UNIT!" Pedrelino's voice reverbed through the field as the few agents that finally recovered from the shock went into emergency actions, some running off and some running to the direction of where the blood trail ends.

There was an obvious pool of blood forming under you, as your whole torso was littered with the same redness. Your left ribcage was angled inwards in an anomalous way as the dual blades had logged itself in between the ribs. You were already unconscious as blood dripped from the side of your lips;

how unfortunate, Childe collapsed to his knees in front of you. You didn't get to congratulate him.

xi. eleventh of the fatui harbinger

His mission had been explained to him concisely and accurately alongside Signora's assignment right after he had been acknowledged as officially part of the Fatui. The throne room had itself full of the Harbingers (with a glaring absence of one) as the Tsaritsa empowered him with her will and concise plan, the gravity of the law and order of the universe and its incoming divine war finally weighing on his shoulders. It was, after all, his wish to end the ministrations of being under someone's supervision and finally walk his path of conquering.

A month after the fight had him standing by the piers of the Snezhnayan ocean. Here he will finally depart to Liyue where his true mission lays, as well as the franchise of the Northland Bank he'd have to oversee. The influx of information for both his and the other's works had his head reeling, pleading silently at the hope that you'd be there to reassure and clarify what exactly he needs to do.

But you're not. In fact, Childe hasn't seen you in the whole month after that fight. He was prohibited from approaching your ward as you were still unstable and fragile to risk; no, everyone was not allowed to enter, he assured himself. He had not seen nor heard you throughout the grieving process of a moment he should have been proud to boast.

During that time, Childe had also adamantly avoided Scaramouche.

He heaved a tired sigh as the consequences weighed his resolve once again, were you still unconscious? Are you still in critical condition or are you recovering? If things ended ever so differently, would you be there next to him to wave him off to his first major assignment? "Liyue, huh, that's a pretty nice nation."

Childe produced a strangled noise when he turned to his right, where you stood, watching the ocean horizon. Your hair was slightly disheveled yet framed your face naturally. There were bandages wrapped all over your torso, peeking out from the sleeves of your unusually covered attire, and your left arm settled on a sling meant to lessen the constraints of your side instead of sporting an actual broken limb. When Childe's calculating gaze settled on your face, you had a calm expression.

"Congratulations, you're finally on your way to your first mission."

"Thank you, although I heard it's quite different from what I'm used to. Besides seafood, too many new customs."

You produced a soft gasp as your eyes widened slightly. Childe stood guard, waiting for you to tell him what was wrong. "I'm a failure of a mentor," what. His eyes watched as you turned to face him (as he did) with an amused glint in your eyes paired by a light smirk. "I didn't get to teach you how to use chopsticks."

His face dropped into a deadpan, before you two harmonized into bouts of varying laughter. Your other hand placed itself on your chest to minimize the vibrations of your giggles, not wanting to put pain into yourself. A flash of hurt recognition passed through his eyes.

"Master, I'm so-"

"(Y/N)." You immediately interjected as you gazed at him past your eyelashes. His breath hitches.

"Ah, (Y/N)," you nodded at his experimental taste of your name and urged him to continue. He opens his mouth before closing it again, a silent debate within the depths of his brain, before his lips parted with a different thought. "Teach me when I come back, please?"

Your eyes widen in surprise and amusement, "I'm sure you'd pick it up easily."

You're not wrong, but he's adamant. "Nah, I'm sure I wouldn't, I heard they're really a handful. I'd rather wait for you."

Giggling again, you raised your mobile hand as he did own, exchanging the most genuine smile. "Okay, pinky promise?"

"Pinky promise."

I wrote this for two hours straight to the point that my left arm doesn't work anymore....

@moaa @kookieyachi @zelos-simp @legionqueensav @dandelion-dreams @snackgod @rxsalinee

[kpop-cakepops]

hii i loved snuggle donation!! i was wondering if i can request a wonwoo imagine where he and the reader are besties and one of them (u can pick!) gets their wisdom teeth taken out so they’re all loopy afterwards and the other one takes care of them. just a whole lot of fluff hehe thank u <333

OH MY GOD. ANON I'M SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG. I've been a bit busy but I was able to squeeze this one out for you. Since you mentioned you enjoyed "Snuggle Donation" I connected the two requests! I hope you enjoy it! Thank you for requesting!

Warnings: None.

Genre: Fluff

Word count: 1,282

The Best Friend A Girl Could Ask For//Jeon Wonwoo x Fem!Reader

"I can't feel anything" Y/N was poking at her cheek drowsily while Wonwoo finished signing her out at the front desk.

"Hey, stop touching, you're only going to bleed more" he called out as he walked up to the drowsy girl. "Come on, let's get you home" His long arm snaked under her, shifting her weight onto his so he could help her steady herself as they stepped outside.

"Where are you taking me?" Y/N asked.

"We're going home. We'll watch your favorite movies and eat ice cream like you wanted" He assured praying to all existing deities that she wouldn't cause a scene. She didn't. Y/N was quiet for the most part of the drive back home with the occasional random comment.

Eventually, they made it to the girl's small apartment, Wonwoo struggling far less than she had when she had to drag him to his house after the blood donation. "Wow, that wath tho long ago" she lisped out as her best friend set her down on the couch carefully.

"What was?" He asked, his large hands pulling her shoes off.

"The cuddling." She quipped.

Wonwoo let out a small nervous cough. "Right, it was a hot minute ago" he laughed. "Anyways, let me see the gauze" his fingertips tapped at her chin so she would open up. A soft gag left his lips at the sight of the bloody gauze.

Y/N on the other hand found it funny that he was trying to take care of her when he couldn't even stand straight at the sight of blood. "Cute" she giggled.

"Shut up. I'll get you a cold pack for your chipmunk cheeks."

Y/N watched as the tall man stepped over to her small kitchen. Her loopy mind causing her to lean back. "I want wather too pweath"

The little smile on Wonwoo's face went unnoticed as he walked back over to Y/N. "Does it hurt a lot? You need to tell me when it starts hurting so I can get you your pain killers" His voice was soft, unlike every other time the two had hung out.

"I'm fine, I'm just thirsty"

"Here. Careful with the straw." He warned as he held the glass up to the drowsy woman's lips. "Should we put in a movie?"

Y/N nodded her head and watched as Wonwoo busied himself with choosing a movie for the two to watch. For some unknown reason, a very sudden and strong urge to cry took over her. There he was, Jeon Wonwoo, the same dorky kid that never talked in school, more often interested in video games and books than making friends... yet he had stuck around Y/N who was the complete opposite of him for so long. They were both now in their mid-twenties and he was there, taking care of her as if it were his duty.

The sudden sniffles next to him caused Wonwoo to turn to Y/N in alarm. "Hey what's wrong? Does it hurt? God, I told you to tell me if it hurt" his tone was stern yet soft as he stood from the couch but Y/N's hand grabbed at his wrist.

"No, it doethn't hurt." she said. "I juth really love you man. You really are the beth friend a girl could ath for" She cried.

Wonwoo laughed a little to himself, "What? Why so suddenly?"

"I don't know. In middle thchool you never talked to anyone, you were tho quiet, but you talked to me. When all the girlth in our grade hated me becauth of how loud I wath, you talked to me-" The poor girl couldn't even continue, her gauze and crying causing her throat to shut down.

Wonwoo ruffled her hair tenderly, "They hated you because you were pretty and all the boys liked you, you idiot. Plus, I only asked you to turn in your homework, and before I knew it you were talking my ear off at lunch."

"You could have told me to thcrew off" she said. "If it wath that annoying-"

"Why would I? You were funny. Plus, I was a boy... and all the boys in our grade liked you remember?" He winked over at you and finished setting up the movie.

Y/N's boggled mind didn't seem to understand what Wonwoo had just insinuated. All she knew was that she really loved her best friend and wouldn't change him for the world. "Hug me, bitch" her hands grabbed at his long arm placing it over her shoulder.

She managed to comfortably wedge the cold pack Wonwoo had gotten her between her cheek and his chest. The cold of it causing the man to hiss under his breath but he didn't remove it knowing you were probably dead tired and couldn't hold it even if you tried.

It took only minutes for Y/N to fall asleep completely. Wonwoo took the chance to stand up and clean around a bit knowing Y/N wouldn't be able to do much of anything for the next couple of days... not so much because of the surgery or the pain, but more so because of the lack of solid foods the girl would be undergoing.

It took the sleepy girl a few hours to come to. The smell of soup greeting her nicely. "Wonwoo?"

"In the Kitchen" He called out. The girls stood from her seat and lazily walked herself over to her tiny kitchen. The same tiny kitchen that was invaded by her tall best friend. He moved around like he knew what he was doing, and she couldn't help but find it cute. The scene managing to make her confused little tummy do a flip.

"What are you doing?" she winced at the feeling of the soggy gauze in her mouth.

"Making you dinner since you slept your way past lunch" he replied. "Also, you should get rid of the gauze. You don't need it anymore"

She did as told taking the chance to peek over the boy's shoulder. "What are you making?" she questioned curiously.

"Soup." he answered curtly. That alone made the girl smile.

"Not going too well for you?" she asked.

The boy let out a defeated sigh and turned to look at her. "No. I'm sorry. I got all excited when you said I was the best friend a girl could ask for and thought I'd be able to do at least this much, but I have been proven wrong."

Y/N giggled softly. "It's fine, Woo. We can just order some stew from the little restaurant down the street."

"Do you want that? I can go pick it up for you right now!"

"I should get all my teeth removed if it's gonna get you to pamper me like this. I could seriously live life this way" She grinned.

"Shut up or I'll change my mind"

"I'll go with you. It's not like I have much to do anyways." she shrugged.

"Okay, let me go get your shoes for you."

"Woo, I think I can do at least that muc-"

He didn't let her finish as he grabbed her shoes from the door and forced her to sit down. "Hey, I thought you said you could get used to this life. I'm here to take care of you. Now hush."

The rest of the day followed the same way. Y/N claiming she could get used to having him take care of her and then feeling bad about it. Meanwhile, Wonwoo was starting to like taking care of his best friend... that and a little extra something he hadn't felt since he was 12 years old.

[babygirl-diaz]

how about this tho -- bucky and sam are in heavy denial about how stupid gone they are for each other. and it's mostly bucky's fault :) cue like a bucky barnes from another time or better yet another timeline landing in theirs, and they gotta get him back home. but the other bucky barnes makes all the right moves on sam. makes him laugh, makes him smile, compliments him head to toe -- just easily expresses everything that the real bucky wants to say. bucky barnes being jealous of himself poor bb

(Wrote something based on this. Hope you like it, anon! Sorry it's a bit different from you prompt)

***

Bucky couldn’t sleep. The thoughts of Sam invaded his mind, like they often did these days, keeping him awake in the middle of the night. He thought about that beautiful face, that gorgeous smile… that hot body and that sexy ass that was just begging to be grabbed. Fuck.

But Bucky couldn’t make a move on the other guy because he was the only friend he had, and he didn’t want to lose him. So he was forever doomed to suffer through his schoolboy crush.

Bucky sighed and closed his eyes to finally get some sleep when a sound caught his attention. He was out of his bed before the knock on his door. He knew none of his enemies would knock before they burst into his apartment, but he still got the gun from the side table and took it with him. Pressing the muzzle to the door, he left the chain on as he peeked out of the door. But his eyes widened and his jaw dropped when he saw the person on the other side and the gun almost slipped from his hand.

“What the fuck…” he said incredulously. Standing before Bucky was his mirror image. Well, not exactly his mirror image, but close. He looked a little older than Bucky, was rough around the edges, his beard was slightly thicker, his brown hair was longer, and his eyes were brown instead of blue.

“I know how this looks,” the man said in a gruff voice. It sounded how Bucky would sound if he smoked. “Okay, maybe I don’t know how this looks. But could you please remove the gun from the door and let me in?”

“How did you--” Bucky asked but was interrupted.

“I am you.” The man replied.

Bucky had to be dreaming. This was some lucid dream. He had a powerful urge to pinch himself, but instead, he lowered his gun and stepped aside, letting the other man into the apartment.

“Thanks,” the man said offhandedly.

“Care to explain what’s going on here?” Bucky asked, closing the door behind them.

“I will once I figure it out myself…” the other man replied.

“Well, you’re— you— you look like me.” Bucky said, staring at the other man. “How is that possible?”

“I don’t just look like you, dumbass. Like I said, I am you.” Okay, this man had no manners whatsoever.

“How can there be two of us? Wait, a second…” something hit Bucky. “Hydra… are they back? Did they send you?” He took the gun and pointed it right between the other man’s eyes.

“Hey, whoa, man, chill. I don’t work for Hydra.”

“Then who are you and where did you come from?” Bucky unlocked the safety of the gun and got closer to the other man.

“I keep telling you, asshole, I am you. What part of that is hard to grasp?” The other man asked. He suddenly looked more frustrated than scared. “As for where I am from… that’s hard to explain but let’s just say that I am not from this universe-- your universe.”

“What?” Bucky let the gun down once again. “What’s that even supposed to mean?”

“Do you want me to write it in dumbass and hand it to you?”

Bucky again had the urge to shoot this man. “Can’t you talk without swearing?”

“Why? Does it make you uncomfortable, princess?”

“You are such an asshole. How can you possibly be me?” Bucky asked. “I need to think…” He started pacing the floor, wondering what the fuck was he going to do. He stopped in his tracks when he remembered something. “Wait… how did you know where to find me?”

“I live in the same apartment in my universe. Except mine isn’t so…” he looked around and made a face. “--so clean and I have a cat.”

“A cat?” Bucky asked, surprised.

“Yes, fluffy little creatures, perky ears, long tails… You got those in your universe?”

Bucky threw his hands up. “Of course we have cats in our universe. I am just surprised that I would want anything to do with one.”

“What? You a catphobe?”

“That’s not even a thing..” Bucky scoffed. “And by the way, we’re derailing from the point. How did you get here?”

“Hell if I know,” the other man shrugged. “One second I am passed out drunk in my apartment and then the next thing I know I wake up in a strange-looking Brooklyn.”

“You can get drunk?” Bucky asked, surprised. The other Bucky had the bionic arm, even if it was old-fashioned. Then he had to have Bucky’s powers, too.

“It was with Thor. He brought out his special Asgardian liquor, and we got hammered,” the other man explained. “Pun fully intended.”

Bucky rolled his eyes at him and started pacing again. “I can’t do this alone. I need help.” He said, more to himself than the other man.

“Who are you calling?” The other man asked when Bucky picked up his phone to call.

“Sam.”

***

Sam looked exhausted when he arrived at Bucky’s doorstep, and Bucky hated to admit it, but his half asleep state and his grumpy face made him look kinda cute. Okay. Right. Focus Buck.

“What’s so urgent that you asked me to take the first flight here?”

“Okay, so don’t freak out…” Bucky said, putting his hands out in front of him.

“You telling me to not freak out is freaking me out, Buck.” Sam sidestepped Bucky and into the apartment. “So what is it?”

“You have to see it to believe it,” Bucky told him as he led him to the bedroom. He slowly opened the door, and the first thing to hit his ears was the sound of snoring.

“What the hell?!” Sam screeched, causing the other Bucky to practically fall off the bed in his haste to get up. “That’s--” Sam looked between the other Bucky and Bucky, before rushing out to the living room.

Bucky went after him and tried to touch his shoulder, but Sam shrugged him away. “What is going on? Who is that?”

“He’s apparently me,” Bucky explained. “From another universe.”

Sam blinked at Bucky before bursting out laughing. “He’s you. From another universe? Good one, Buck!”

When Bucky didn’t laugh along, Sam’s laughter died down. “You’re not joking.”

“No, he’s not.” Bucky turned around to find the other Bucky standing behind them in nothing but his boxers. “Hey, Sam,” the man tilted his head to the side and offered Sam a smirk.

Sam looked at him from top to bottom, making Bucky frown.

“Hi… Bucky?” Sam greeted him unsurely. “This is really freaky…”

“You’re telling me,” Bucky mumbled.

“H- how did you get to this universe?” Sam asked the other Bucky.

The other Bucky walked over to Sam and stopped a little too close to him. “I have no idea, sweetheart.”

“Sweetheart?” Bucky and Sam asked at the same time and looked at each other.

“What? You don’t like it?” The other Bucky lowered his voice even more.

Sam cleared his throat and shook his head at that. “No, that- that’s fine.”

“Well, doll, I gotta say, you are hot.”

Bucky’s breath suddenly became shallow, and his hands tightened into fists beside him. How dare this man call Sam hot? Yes, Sam was hot. Really hot. But this man had no right to call him that.

“Oh, wow.” Sam chuckled nervously and bit down on his lips. “Thanks, man. You aren’t bad looking yourself. Love the rough around the edges look ya got going on.”

“Why, thanks, baby,” the other Bucky winked at him.

Bucky had enough of the other Bucky’s flirting, and he put himself between him and Sam. “Can we get back to the important part? How do we get you back home?”

The other Bucky dropped on the couch and put his arms behind his head. “No clue. I don’t even know how I got here in the first place.”

“We need help, Buck. This is way above our paygrade.”

Bucky agreed with Sam. This wasn’t a problem they could solve on their own. “Should we ask Dr. Strange for help?”

“It’s worth the try-”

“So you got the wizard over here too?” The other Bucky chimed in.

A broad smile spread across Sam’s lips. “THANK YOU!” Sam said a little too loudly. “Glad someone else agrees that he’s a wizard.” He raised his hand to high five with the other, Bucky, who enthusiastically returned the five. “By the way, we need a name for you. Can’t call you Bucky. It will be too confusing.”

“You can call me darling if you like, doll,” the other Bucky started flirting again. “I wouldn’t mind.”

Sam nervously chuckled at that again, “While I love that suggestion, I think I will go with James.”

“Shame,” the other Bucky-- James pouted. He actually pouted.

Sam sat down beside James and James immediately moved closer to him much to Bucky’s chagrin. “What’s the last thing you remember?” Sam asked.

“I remember going to bed drunk last night and then waking up here this morning.”

“How did you know you were in a different universe?” Bucky asked, crossing his arms across his chest.

“Everything felt wrong…”

Bucky and Sam looked at each other before Sam asked, “That can’t be the only thing, James.”

James sighed. “I’ve been sent to a different universe before.”

“You have?” Asked Bucky.

“Yeah… It just feels different when you’re in a different universe. It’s really hard to explain. You know how when you go to a different country and the wind suddenly doesn’t feel right? It’s like that except dialed up to 100.”

“So universe hopping isn’t anything new to you?” Bucky asked with an edge in his voice. “Why didn’t you tell me that before?”

“Didn’t wanna freak ya out, dumbass,” James replied.

“Do you have to call me that?”

Sam looked up at him and chuckled, making Bucky frown even more.

“So, sweetheart, you got a lady or fella in your life?” James threw his bionic arm around Sam’s shoulder and pulled him closer.

Bucky wanted nothing more than to remove his arm and strangle him.

Sam threw a quick glance at Bucky before replying, “I’m single.”

“Nahhh… that can’t be true. A handsome fella like you doesn’t have anyone in his life. It’s impossible.”

“Are you always this flirty?” Sam asked him instead.

“Only around someone as sexy as you.” James leered at Sam like he wanted to eat him up.

Sam chuckled and looked down at the floor.

Bucky couldn’t take it anymore. He was practically in love with Sam and couldn’t do anything about it. Yet, here was another version of him, touching him and openly flirting with him.

“Sam! Let’s go. We should go talk to Dr. Strange.” Bucky grabbed Sam’s arm and pulled him up.

Sam threw him an annoyed look and pulled his arm out of Bucky’s grip. “Fine! Let’s go.”

“What do I do?” James asked.

Bucky threw him an annoyed look. “You stay here and watch tv or something. We’ll be back soon.”

[vosiro]

⇾ Pairing: Kuroo Tetsurō x F!reader

⇾ Warnings: this shit nasty fr 18+, also CEO!Kuroo bc that’s sexy,

⇾ Authors note: In honor of my husbands birthday, I decided to write this nasty ass shit😜. See, ion know what demon POSSESSED me to write this but...🧍🏾‍♀️anyway, Y/n is implied black, but if you’re not black it’s ite!! There will be some use of AAVE on Y/n’s part tho, and she not finna be one of them “I-I-...b-but k-kuroo!” Shy bitches NONE OF DHET. She a bad bitch and that’s on prd. (Shy bitches still bad doe!!) is this self indulgent? Yea idc 💃🏾

≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣ ≣

It was officially November 17, your husband’s birthday. When you had woken up, kuroo had already left for work, so the bed was empty. For the past week and a half you’ve been contemplating what to get him. You see, for your birthday, kuroo always showered you in gifts, money, clothes, anything you wanted. That was exactly the problem. Kuroo had the money, the expenses and the power to get anything either you or him wanted, what could you possible get him that he couldn’t already afford himself. For the past couple years y’all were married, you two always went to some fancy restaurant to eat, then went to a hotel to have some casual birthday sex. This year, you wanted it to be different, you wanted it to be special.

You walked into your local bar in a thin, golden bodycon dress, with a black, expensive fluffy jacket, that just made your skin pop. You just looked like walking money. And ofcourse kuroo had to have his girl walking around with that Hermes Birkin 30cm Himalayan with diamond hardware. You looked around the bar before you saw kiyoko waiting at a table. “Heyy shimizu” you gleamed, sitting down at the empty seat across from kiyoko. “Hey, Y/n-Chan” she replied, passing you the drink that was preordered.

“So.” You sigh.

“So? What’s wrong?” Kiyoko questioned.

“I don’t know what to get tetsu for his birthday...” you replied, taking a sip of your drink.

“I’m sure he’ll like anything you get him.” She reassured.

“Girl, but listen...This man got 4 cars, 3 houses, a visa black card, and a bad ass bitch. What more does he need...wtf do you be getting ryōsuke for his birthday??” You questioned

“Well, he usually likes anything I get him. It’s all about the thought y/n. You love him right? Any gift from your heart, he’ll like.” Kiyoko answered.

“Girrrr....you right, you right. Matter ah fact, I have an idea.” You grabbed your lil birkin bag and started to get out the chair “thank you shimizu! Make sure you get to the party at 7:30, tetsu’ll be back at 8!” You said as you rushed out the bar.

You made your way to the expensive lingerie store that was right next to the penthouse you live in with your husband. You quickly entered the store, looking around for something sexy, but cute, but nasty. Kuroo would never admit it, but he gets flustered easily. When you bend over, when you lean down infront of him and he gets a nice view of your tits, when your skirt’s a little too short, when you call him in the middle of a business meeting, and he has to excuse himself so he can fuck his fist to your moans and cries over the phone. You knew exactly how to rile him up, and that’s one of the things he loved about you.

You’ve been browsing the lingere sets at the store for a while, before you see it. A perfect thin, red, sexy, lingerie with garter belts. Not to toot your own horn or anything, but this would just make your skin pop. You quickly grab the set and pay for it, making your way back to the penthouse after.

———————————————————————

It was currently 7:58. Kuroo was expected to arrive at 8. Guests were under the table, hiding behind chairs, any possible place a person could squeeze themselves into. You were hiding under behind the kitchen counter with kiyoko. “Psst. Shimu,” you whispered.

“I’m right here y/n..” she replied.

“Right... anyway, guess what I got tetsu for his birthday.” You asked eagerly.

“Your love and affection??” She answered.

“Girl no...well yes...but no.” You said.

“Then what?” Kiyoko questioned.

“I got 𝐿𝒾𝓃𝑔𝑒𝓇𝒾𝑒.” You replied

“You’re making him wear lingerie??” She said.

“...😏” You smirked

“I’m kiddi-”

*clack*

The door to the penthouse opened slowly and everyone let out a big

“SURPRISE!”

Bokuto ran up to kuroo and gave him a big bear hug “HAPPY BIRTHDAY BRO!” he exclaimed. Kuroo went around greeting everyone, and thanking them for showing up. You were still talking with kiyoko before he started to approach you. “I should leave you two alone.” She she said before walking away to talk with her own husband.

“You planned all of this for me, baby?” He cooed as he took you into his arms for a hug, “yessuh, anything for you.” You said nuzzling your face into his chest. He started to place small kisses down your neck “fuck...I missed you...” His breath was hot against your skin “not here...let’s wait till the party’s over okay, babe?” You wanted to, you wanted to so bad... but one thing about kuroo is he goes feral when you make him wait

———————————————————————

11:00. The last few guests had left a while ago, and kuroo had just got done finishing his shower after you had yours. He walked out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, his chiseled chest on full display. This man was always so damn fine, like whew fuck it’s getting hot in hea fr. He sat next to you and started kissing ur collar bone, slowly removing your robe from your skin.

“You don’t understand how bad I wanted to fuck you,” He whispered into your skin. “I was hard the entire night...”

He completely removed the robe from your skin. “Oya? What’s this, baby?”

“Surprise.” You moaned slightly as he slid his hands to grip your ass “tonight, I’ll let you do anything you want to me..”

He halted in his movements “anything?”

“Mhm~” you reassured

You reach down to palm him through the towel, “someone’s really excited.” You say as you stroke him slowly. “That’s because my girl looks so damn sexy right now...and she’s letting me do whatever I want tonight.” Kuroo reaches down to rub circles on your clit.

“Mm~” he stick his tongue down your mouth as you let out your moan. “You’re so wet...it’s seeping through your panties and spilling onto my fingers..” he grins “only for you, daddy..” you say.”

“Fuck..the whole day I was thinking about coming home and fucking you... I even jerked off to the thought of you at work today,” He flipped you over onto your hands and knees, “Now you’re here...all sexy for me.” The towel slid off, and so did your panties as well. “I’m gonna fuck you so good baby, you won’t be able to walk or talk after..” he cooed, rubbing his tip along your folds

“W-wait tetsu, you just not gon prep me or n-fuck!!” He slammed his cock into you with a deep groan.

“Just Shutup and t-take it... fuckk...you’re tight.” He moved in and out of your cunt at an agonizingly slow pace.

“Faster daddy..” you moaned out

“Yea? My baby’s feeling good?” He picked up his pace and started jamming into you harder. You lifted your body up slightly. “Stay the fuck down.” He growled as he grabbed your neck, not wanting to mess up your hair. “Fuck, you feel so fucking good baby.” He was picking up the paste and hitting that one spot he knew you liked. You were moaning loudly into the pillow before he flipped you over onto your back.

“I wanna see that pretty face when I fuck you.” He started fucking you slowly in mission watching his dick get covered in your cream as went in and out. He then took your hand and put it on your lower stomach. “You feel that baby?” He picked up his pace slightly. “You feel how deep I am? Fuck.” His eyes were tainted with lust, and cheeks painted with blush. Your hand felt each and every thrust he was putting into you.

“F-fuck tetsu, you’re so big..” you whimpered. Kuroo was always a sucker for praise. “Yea? Look at you, you’re such a good girl taking all of it.” He groaned out.

“Open your mouth baby.” He stuck two fingers in your mouth coating them in saliva, then slowly sheathing them into your other right hole. You whine out at the stretch. “I want both of my kitten’s holes to be filled tonight.” He let out as he stretched your ass.

“Shit, relax baby, you’re so tight you’re gonna cut off my circulation.”

“F-feels s’good” you moaned as he continued to satisfy both your holes. “C’mere baby.” He pulled you into the reverse cowgirl position. “You knew what you were doing naughty girl” he groaned as you bounced on his dick “shit...dressing up...fuck...like that.” You were squeezing him so tightly and it just felt so good.

“Yes, I knew..mm~” there was no point in lying, you knew exactly how kuroo would react. He landed a smack on your ass “I’ll have to punish you princess,” you heard a spit noise come from behind you, then felt a warm trail of saliva roll down onto you right puckered ass hole. Kuroo massaged the liquid around the hole “fuck, you think my dick would fit in here? My cum dripping out of you pussy and you ass? That’s so sexy..” you winced as he stuck his thumb inside. “Shi.. does it feel that good? You like that? You’re squeezing so tight, fuck.” He groped your ass, letting out a low moan.

“Suck your cream off my dick baby.”

“Yes daddy.” You replied getting off of him and on your knees. You take his girth cock into your mouth. You started bobbing your head quickly, tasting yourself on his dick. He place a firm grip on the top of your head. “Y-yes, just like tha...mm.. fuck.. your so good to me baby.” His hips started bucking into your mouth roughly, you could tell he was close “fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck.”

He grabbed your head halting you to stop. “I wanna cum inside you..”

“Then do it daddy, cum inside me...”

“Fuck. Get on your hands and knees.”

He slid back into you once again letting out a deep moaning after regaining stimulation “how are you still this fucking t-tight...no matter how hard I fuck you...fuck.” He leaned forward and stuck his fingers in your mouth while pounding you into the mattress.

“Mm~ tetsu I’m close~” you whined out

“Yeah? Cum for me baby, milk my cock, I’m gonna stuff you so good.” Ah yes, an even more feral kuroo...truly delicous. “I’m gonna fill you up with my kids...fuck what if you get pregnant.” He groaned. “You’d look so cute with your tummy swollen.” He started picking up his paste, pounding into your sweet spot even harder. “Tetsu, I’m- nngh~ fuck.” Your orgasm washed over you, you were completely fucked out, but he still kept pounding into you.

“Fuck. That’s right, cum on my dick.” One of his arms were on the headboard while the other was wrapped so comfortably around your neck. “C’mon baby. Cum for me one more time. I know you can do it.” He grunted

“I c-cant tetsu.” Your body was still shaking in ecstasy. “Yes you can, c’mon” The hand around your neck reached down to rub your wet clit rough and fast. Needless to say he had you cumming in no time. “Fuck fuck fuck tetsu-”

“Shit, I’m almost there baby, just hold on for a littl- fuck.. bit more.” His thrust started to grow sloppy. “Fuck, I’m cu-uh..nngh.” He let out the most deep and beautiful moan as he spilled his seed into you with one last thrust. You fell onto your back and kuroo right on to of you.

“Fuck baby, that was the best birthday present ever.” He huffed, still out of breath

“Mm~ tetsu! You went too rough..now I’m finna be aching all day. My entire body hurts.” Yo complained.

“Atleast your sexy and in pain.” He said, placing a kiss on your forehead.

“Stfu.”

Fin.

———————————————————————

Did I proof read this? No🧜🏽‍♀️ anyways I wish kuroo a happy birthday mwah 🥰

Me writing plot: 🤮👺🤢👹

Me writing sex scenes: 😏🌝😜🥰

[ladydimitrescuspet]

Make Me Feel Better - Chapter 3

ao3 link! fair warning, reader gets spanked, it's not like graphic or anything, but it happens. sorry for the wait, but please enjoy and tell me what you think in my ask box on @homoo-wan-kenobi! and apologies for any grammatical errors!

***

You’d told Angelika that you’d be right back after you went to go check on Natalie. You knocked on her door, hoping that she’d be in there.

"Yes?” She answered when she opened the door. “Oh, Y/N, it’s you! Is everything alright between you and Lady Dimitrescu?” Natalie asked as she let you into the room.

“Everything’s fine.” You said. “I just wanted to make sure you were fine. That she hadn’t done anything to you.”

Natalie gave you a small smile. “I appreciate that, Y/N.”

“I should probably get back.” You said. “But I’m glad you’re okay and I swear I won’t ever ask you to do something like that.” You pulled Natalie in for a hug, holding her for a few minutes before letting go. “I’ll see you tomorrow. Good night.” You said before you exited the room.

As you walked back to Lady Dimitrescu’s chambers you ran into Angelika coming out. “Oh, the Lady wanted me to tell you that she’s gone to speak with Lord Heisenberg and she’ll be up momentarily.” You nodded your head. “And your bath is ready.”

“Thank you.” You replied before you entered to get ready for Lady Dimitrescu’s arrival after her conversation with Heisenberg. Poor man, he was in for it big time with her. And you were right about that.

“Heisenberg,” Alcina started, but he cut her off.

“Listen, Al, before you get all huffy and puffy, let me just say this.” Alcina crossed her arms. “Y/N told me what happened with Daniela, what she said. Did you talk to Daniela at all before you shipped her off to Mother Miranda?” Heisenberg asked.

Alcina shook her head. “I saw no reason to, Heis. She lashed out at Y/N and I simply don’t have time to deal with her behaviour right now. If any one is fit to do so, it’s Mother Miranda.” Alcina replied. “Why? Are you questioning my parenting skills?”

Heisenberg shrugged. “Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. All I’m saying is that maybe you should’ve talked to your daughter first.” Heisenberg said. “It’s obvious that Daniela feels like you care more about Y/N than you do her and her sisters. And the fact that you sent her away and took Y/N’s side proves that, Al.”

Alcina growled at her brother. “How dare you?!” Alcina practically roared at him. “I appreciate you getting Y/N here safely, but you have no right to talk to me about my daughters. I care for each of them as I care about Y/N. For you to stand there and imply that my daughter lashed out because I am not giving her enough attention is outrageous.” Alcina said in a dangerously calm voice.

Heisenberg gulped. “I know it’s not my place to judge your parenting and I’m not.” Heisenberg said. “But when the girls get back home, just speak to Daniela. Obviously she’s holding some resentment towards Y/N for some reason. She lashed out for a reason, Alcina. And you, you weren’t there for her. I know Y/N needs you, but sometimes you have to tend to your family first.”

“Get out, Heisenberg. Get out right now!” Alcina yelled, her claws extending.

Heisenberg held his hands up. “I’ll go, Al, but talk to Dani before she does something you can’t reverse.” Heisenberg said. "And go easy on the kid, they were just scared, Alcina." He added before walking away from her.

Alcina allowed her claws to retract before letting out a sigh. “Maybe that idiot brother of mine is right,” She mumbled to herself as she headed back upstairs. When she entered the room you were sat on the bed without any clothes on, but wrapped in a blanket. “What do you think you’re doing?” Alcina asked.

“I got cold.” You replied, snuggling deeper into the blanket that you had wrapped around you. Alcina raised her eyebrow and you removed the blanket. “Better?” You asked.

“Much.” She replied before sitting at the vanity. “I see you didn’t listen to my instructions.”

You shrugged. “I didn’t feel like being in ropes tonight, My Lady.” Alcina raised her eyebrow again at you defying her orders to better suit how you were feeling. “May I say something?” You asked and she nodded her head. “I’m worried about Daniela.”

“As you were before you ran away, though you didn’t explicitly say that.” Alcina said. “Heisenberg’s already given me his opinion and told me that I should talk to her.”

You nodded your head. “He’s just concerned about his niece.” You replied. “And I am too. I mean, I’m still hurt by what Daniela said, but I care about her. And this Mother Miranda you sent her to, Heis doesn’t make her out to be a good person.”

“I wouldn’t call Mother Miranda a saint, but she will certainly know how to help Daniela reign in her emotions.” Alcina said. “You needn’t worry yourself with how Mother Miranda works, it’s none of your concern.”

You frowned. “Who even is Mother Miranda, Alcina?” You asked.

Alcina sighed before she met your gaze in the mirror. “That’s an explanation for another day, darling.” Alcina replied. You cocked your head to the side at the reply. “Don’t give me that look. I am very upset you with you and your actions.”

You lowered your head. “I’m s-“ Alcina cut you off.

“I don’t want to hear it, Y/N.” Alcina said before she stood up and made her way over to the bed. “You put not only yourself in danger, but that of your friend, Natalie. If Heisenberg hadn’t found you… Where were you even going?” Alcina asked.

You shook your head. “I don’t know. I just, I got scared.” You replied softly. “I had to get away for a while. I was going to come back in a few days, promise.”

“What were you scared of?” Alcina asked as she crouched down in front of you. “Were you scared of Daniela? Of me?”

You shook your head. “No, not of you, never of you. And Daniela, yes, I am scared of her, but she’s not even here.” You replied.

“Then what, Y/N?” Alcina asked, her voice a bit more firm.

You looked up at her, your lip trembling a bit. “Last night, I had a dream that I was with the people that kidnapped me. And then when Daniela snapped at me, it just made me remember the terrible things they said to me… and I got scared because what if they’re looking for me? I don’t want them to find me.”

Alcina cupped your face in her hands. “So why’d you leave the castle, little one? They’d get you out there in the village, yes, but in here? On my grounds? They wouldn’t dare touch you. Do you understand me?” You nodded your head as best as you could. “You could’ve talked to me about it, you didn’t have to run. Do you know how worried I was about you?” Alcina asked. You nodded your head. “If anything happens to you… I just can’t let that happen.” She let your face go before she went to go get the box from the other night and placed it next to you on the bed.

“What’s that?” You asked.

Alcina grinned. “It’s a surprise.” Alcina replied. “And I’d let you have it, but you haven’t been good for me. In fact, you’ve been very, very bad and Mommy is not happy with you.” You gulped as your heart race picked up. “I see you’ve grown a little scared of what I have planned for you.”

You shook your head. “I’m not scared.” But you both knew that wasn’t true.

“Oh, is that so?” You nodded your head. “Very well then. Shall I let you choose your punishment, hmm?” You nodded your head again albeit hesitantly this time. “By all means, throw some suggestions my way, draga mea.”

“I could clean the castle by myself.” You suggested. Alcina shook her head. “No sex?”

Alcina frowned. “That would be punishment for both you and me, dear. Try again.”

You scratched your head. “I could… you could have your way with me and then, then you could chain me up or, um, put me in the cellar.” You fidgeted with your fingers while you spoke.

Alcina hummed. “It’s an interesting idea, pet.” She said as she leaned down, placing her hands on your thighs. “But first, we’re going to have a little fun. Crop or paddle?”

Your eyes widened at her question. “Wh-what, My Lady?”

Alcina pursed her lips. “You know I don’t like repeating myself. Either you pick one or I do.” She growled out.

“The, um, the cr-crop.” You replied. Alcina grinned as she pushed herself off of you and headed toward her closet. “Will it h-hurt?” You called out to her. She didn’t reply so after a few minutes you called out to her again. “Alcina?”

“Yes, dear?” Alcina replied. Your words caught in your throat when she stepped out of the closet. “Dear, if you’re not going to speak then please let me concentrate in silence, yes?” You gulped before nodding your head and she smiled at you before she went back into the closet.

You let out a deep breath. She looked absolutely gorgeous in the black slip she had on. You didn’t realise she was changing when you had called out to her and the thought made you flush a bit. You were so lost in your thoughts that you didn’t realise she’d come out of the closet until the crack of the crop made you jump.

“Penny for your thoughts, my dear?” You opened your mouth to answer but no words came out causing Alcina to chuckle. “Oh, cat got your tongue, hmm?”

“N-no, My Lady.” You replied. Your face was on fire from when you’d seen her the second time she exited the closet. She’d change from the black slip to a black lacy corset, her stocking connected to her garter belt with suspenders, and a pair of panties that matched her corset. She’d taken her hair down, letting it rest against her shoulder blades. “You look mesmerising, My Lady.”

Alcina hummed as she walked toward you. “Flattery won’t get you anywhere now, soarece mic.” Alcina said before standing right in front of you. “Up.” You obeyed, standing up face to face with her thighs. “You listen so well.” Alcina sat down in the spot that you’d previously occupied before pulling you into her lap.

“I tho-“ You started, but she cut you off.

“Relax, little one.” She cooed. “To answer your question, yes, it will hurt. But don’t worry, Mommy’s going to take good care of you after.” She whispered into the back of your head before pressing a kiss against your head.

“You will, My Lady?” You asked.

“Of course, darling.” She replied. “Now, shall I have you over my knee or would you like to hold onto the wall?” You sat on her lap in silence as she ran the crop over your thigh in a circular motion. “Won’t you answer my question, dear?” She whispered into your ear.

You nodded your head and bit your lip as you thought about which position you wanted to be in. You let out a startled yelp when you felt the crop hit your thigh causing you to cry out an answer to her. “Your knee, My Lady!” Your lip trembled at the sting of the crop, you hadn’t expected her to hit you.

“I told you that it would hurt.” She chided before she pushed you off her lap. “Over my knee. And if you need to help muffle your sounds, you may bite my thigh. I’m not in the mood to take pleasure in your noises.”

You nodded your head before you placed yourself over her knee. You felt her push her other knee against your legs to lock you into place and you braced yourself for the first hit, but it never came. “My Lady?"

Alcina hummed. “I’m just appreciating you for a moment, pet.” The statement caused you to smile and flush a bit.  “How many minutes until the hour, dear?”

“Um,” You started before you turn your head as best as you could to see the clock. “23 minutes, My Lady.” You replied.

Alcina grinned. “Then you will get 23 hits. I don’t want you to count them. I want you to stay still and be good for Mommy. Can you do that for me?” You nodded your head. “Good.” She said before she raised the crop and hit your right cheek causing you to stiffen. “Was that alright, pet?”

“Yes, My Lady, that was fine.” You replied.

She didn’t reply, instead she took her time alternating between both of your cheeks as she hit you with the crop. By the seventh hit, your fingers were digging into the flesh of her thighs as you had your mouth over her thigh to muffle your cries. Alcina made sure to praise you every few hits, proud of how well you were taking your punishment. By the fifteenth hit, you were silently sobbing into her leg, your bottom had gone numb a bit, and your grip on her had tightened. Lucky for you, there were only eight more hits left. But by the time she'd gotten to 23, your body felt like jelly. Your arm was hanging down her leg and your face was pressed into Alcina. You didn't even realise that she'd finished until she sat you up in her arms.

"Hush now, little one, it's over." Alcina said softly as she pressed a kiss to your forehead before wiping away your tears with the pads of her thumbs. You pushed yourself face first into her chest to cry a little more before you allowed yourself to calm down. "Are you alright now, dear?" You nodded your head slightly in response.

Alcina then laid you down on the bed face first and you whispered at the loss of her touch. "I'll be right back, draga mea." She pressed a kiss to your temple before she got up from the bed and headed to the bathroom. When she exited the bathroom you could see something in her hand and noticed that she now donned a black robe. "I'm going to spread this over your bottom to help soothe it." Alcina explained as she sat back down on the bed.

The ointment she out on you was cold at first, but after a while it became quite comforting, making you close your eyes. "So nice." You mumbled out and Alcina chuckled a bit. When she was done she laid down next to you, pulling you back against her.

Alcina ran her hand down your cheek as your breath started to even out. You felt her press a kiss to the back of your neck as her hand came up to you neck. She pressed more kisses to your neck as she held you against her causing you to moan softly. The pleasure of the kisses only lasted a few more seconds before you felt her fangs bit into your neck causing you to scream out in shock.

Alcina drank from you for a moment before she pulled away, her mouth coming up to your ear. Her breath against your ear caused you to shiver. "You're mine." She whispered into your ear. You whimpered when she pushed you onto your back and leaned over you, her hand still choking you a bit. "Do you understand that, draga mea?" You nodded your head as best as you could. Alcina smiled before she leaned down and gave you a kiss, a bloody one to be exact.

When she pulled away, you had blood on your lips and your teeth from when she had pushed her tongue into your mouth. "M-my Lady?" You panted out. Alcina hummed as she pressed more bloody kisses to your neck and chest. "I'm sorry."

Alcina pulled herself away from you and gave you a smile. "I know, little one." Alcina said. "You've been so good for me tonight, I think you deserve a treat. Don't you?" You nodded your head, albeit hesitantly. "It's in the box, go ahead and open it."

You could still feel your blood rolling down your neck as you struggled to sit up. You reached for the box, opening it with shaky hands, gasping when you saw what was in it. You pulled out a black collar with Dimitrescu written on the middle of it, two red roses on each side of the name. The Dimitrescu family crest hung from a ring connected to the collar. You held it in your hands as you looked up at Alcina with wide eyes.

"Do you like it?" You nodded your head. "Splendid. Let me put it on you." You passed the collar to her and allowed her to place it around your neck, making it as tight as possible. "Now, if you ever decide to pull another one of your stupid stunts again, no one will touch you because you're mine." She growled as she tugged on the collar, pulling you closer to her. "Who do you belong to?"

"Y-you, My La-lady. Only y-you." You replied. There was blatant fear in your eyes that pleased Alcina.

Alcina hummed before she attached the collar to a leash. "That's right, darling. You belong to me." She tugged on the leash as she stood up from the bed. "Grab the blanket, pet, you're going to need it." You did as she told you and followed after her as she walked out of the room.

You didn't say anything, but you knew where you were headed. This part of the punishment was inevitable, being put into a cell. "Do I have to?" You asked in a small voice.

Alcina sighed. "I'm afraid so, darling. I wish I didn't have to send you down here, but bad pets need to be thoroughly punished. It'll help you think twice before making bad decisions." Alcina replied. The two of you walked in silence after that, only stopping so she could unlock the door that led to the dungeon. A shiver ran down your spine as you followed her down the stairs, the moaning and growling from the moroaică making you clutch onto the back of Alcina's robe.

"I don't like it down here." You said when the two of you stopped in front of your cell. The cell was customised a bit for you with a small bed and a desk for you to write at. And unlike the other cells, it didn't have bars, but four walls and a door. It was made that way so you wouldn't see anything disturbing and didn't have to worry about creatures being able to come into the cell. When you entered the cell after Alcina unlocked it, you turned to face her. "Please don't leave me down here." You were crying again and you could see the sadness in Alcina's eyes.

Alcina cupped your cheeks and pressed a kiss to your forehead before she straightened herself up. "I'll send one of the girls down here to check on you when they get back." Was all she said before she closed the cell door in your face, locking it.

You stumbled over to the bed, your shoulders rising as you sobbed. Laying down on the bed, you wrapped yourself up in the blanket to provide you with some warmth and comfort. You had no idea how long you would be down here. You pulled your knees up to your chest as you cried and listened to the noises of the creatures outside of your cell, wishing for this part of your punishment would be over, wishing that you'd wake up from this nightmare soon.

[otomegema]

title: Convergence Theory, ch. 2 pairing: Gojo Satoru x Reader summary: You are a lesser family member of the Gojo clan, so far removed you don’t even carry the name, but you carry the Limitless ability and thus the potential to be a bride to the future head of the clan— a fact you patently reject at fifteen. Twelve years later you are a second grade sorcerer struggling to obtain first grade status when the object of your deepest objections offers you a deal. rating: mature tropes: fake dating/engagement, rivals to lovers, slow romance Link: Archive of Our Own

It had been a logical move to allow Gojo to take down your number, entering it into his contacts with an obscene amount of heart and wishing star emojis by the brief glance you caught over his shoulder. It looked like he was already banking on your acceptance of the deal, but when you parted, your to-go sushi in a small plastic bag, you hadn’t expected to hear from him until tomorrow evening at the latest.

Or maybe even never.

But now, back in the hotel you were being comped for while in Tokyo, you wished silently that you’d never given that man your cell phone number.

Honey

Baby

Future-pretend-love-of-my-life

Have you made a decision?

He wasn’t human. It was barely 6am, did he wake up this early for lessons every day? You groaned, nearly swatting the phone off the nightstand in the dark.

You shot back a fast reply.

-oh I’m sorry

-I’m still recovering from getting electrocuted the other day

-Some asshat led a curse to me

You rolled over, managing to get at least another decent half hour of sleep in before the phone chimed again, lighting up the darkened hotel room.

\(★ω★)/

YOUR asshat

Should you choose to accept this mission

You threw off your covers, forcing yourself up to sit against the stack of pillows behind you as you tapped out a reply.

-My pretend asshat

-Mother will be so proud

The dots of his reply began immediately.

So is that a yes?

You sighed, rolling your eyes to yourself.

-Day isn’t over -Hasn’t even started tyvm

The dots began. Stopped. Began and stopped again, this time not reappearing. You tossed your phone onto the bed and teetered up and over to the coffee maker. The pot was finishing brewing by the time your phone chimed again.

You’re so slow.

The addition of punctuation and the sudden lack of emoji seemed almost like a warning flare that Gojo’s patience was waning. But you hardly knew the man and really, what did you care? A favor for a favor was what he offered. You didn’t owe him anything.

I have other options too.

His text continued and for a moment you frowned, wondering if his intention was to have that sound like a threat. You felt heat rising in your throat— he didn’t want to play that game.

So no pressure. Genuinely.

Oh. Good. That was better. You felt the tension uncoil as fast as it had grown.

Tho I AM your only hope for advancement <3

You could have thrown the phone right through the wall. Your thumbs worked rapidly, shooting out your reply in no time.

-Ah yes, your finest quality

A quick appearance of dots.

My special grade ranking? (･ω<)☆

You smirked.

-Humility

You’re no fun.

Text me when you are done being boring.

This was probably the most you had ever spoken to Gojo, despite having seen him on and off from a distance for the better half of your life. He was hard to miss. Every event at the main house would have him and his immediate family at the forefront. No one ever stopped talking about Gojo Satoru and his accomplishments and his strength and his skill as a sorcerer.

It was nauseating, having to pretend to nod and smile like it was all some great blessing just to orbit near him. It was bad enough he read like a sun to your abilities, as if he needed to be made to think he was anymore of the center of the universe.

Your palm itched. The desire to tap back a response now, a firm denial, very strong. But not stronger than your excitement at the possibility of being a first grade sorcerer. It was everything you had wanted. Prestige, recognition, tougher missions and the pay and rewards that came with them.

You were no weakling. Sure the telemetry technique took you out of commission, but it was hardly your greatest feat. You had finally been able to manifest the cursed technique lapse, blue. Granted, it was a one off and exhausted you so fully afterwards that you nearly fainted on the spot… but your tolerance was getting better. The precision of your manipulation of your cursed energy would never be on par with Gojo, but you could, some day, maybe even manage to shoot the technique off twice.

Reversal Red was next to impossible. And Hollow Technique? Truly impossible. The Six Eyes was needed to even attempt it. Most of your practice had been devoted to perfecting your long distance teleportation skills, fine tuning your telemetry technique and working on establishing your domain. That one was easier. The Unlimited Void crushed your opponent beneath an overload of sensory information, information you could easily channel and tap into with your own unique skills as a Limitless user.

But like all things, you were only second best. And barely. It was a joke. Comparing yourself to Gojo. He was on a level you could never achieve— unless.

You grabbed your phone, hastily dialing the new number and wincing at the loud, cheerful greeting from the other line.

“Good morning, moon of my soul, tenderest heart, darling—!“

“I haven’t even said yes yet, you monster.”

“Ah! A name of my very own? Be still my trembling heart!”

“I wish to make an amendment to the agreement.”

There was a lengthy pause. You could practically hear the slow spread of that sly smile. Content as the cat who caught the canary.

He knew he was about to win.

“Let’s hear it.”

“If you are putting my name forward for first grade, that means you have someone else in mind to be the second backer and someone in mind for me to shadow on missions and train with, yeah?

“I do.” Gojo said, his tone surprisingly serious.

“Have them put my name forward instead. I want to shadow you.”

Gojo laughed, a short mirthless thing, “What makes you think I have the time?”

“You have enough time to play pretend, I’d think any fiancé would leap at the chance to be with his lovely wife-to-be and keep her safe.”

Gojo hummed.

“Why me?”

This was an oddly familiar conversation.

“Purely selfish reasons. You are the best Limitless user. I am a Limitless user. I want you to teach me.”

“You aren’t on my level.” He said, no malice in his words, just simple facts.

“Then teach me what I can handle.”

There was another pause.

“I’m not gonna go easy on you just because you’re my girl.”

The bare utterance of the endearment sent a shiver up your arms and not an entirely pleasant one either. His girl. God, how would you even begin to explain this fake engagement to your parents? Who knew the depth of your jealousy and bitterness over Gojo since you were— what? Five? Younger?

“Since I am just your ‘pretend’ girl, I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

“Your funeral, babe.” Gojo said, “But I’m glad we resolved this early! Because we are having dinner. Reservations are made, I’ll pick you up at seven. Wear something pretty!”

Your words caught in your throat, stuttering across your tongue and unable to force out before the line cut off and he was gone.

You pressed the edge of your phone to your temple, already feeling a headache coming on. Something pretty? Shit.

-Something pretty? -Too vague. I have no idea what I’m supposed to wear.

A dress! Something for the evening. A Line.

V Neck def

Show off what puberty gave ya (＾〃＾)

Chiffon with ruffle lace

And grey-blue

-Why?

To match my eyes <3

-Where in the world do you expect me to find that specific dress in the next few hours

Downstairs with hotel staff I had it dropped off <3 <3 <3

-That’s creepy

(つω`｡) </3 </3

-Enough with the hearts -How much? I’ll pay you back

It is a gift <3

-How’d you even know my size

A gentleman never reveals his secrets

┐(‘～` )┌

You sighed and set aside your phone to call down to the front desk. Sure enough, a few minutes later someone brought up a large white box, tied with a grey-blue ribbon. You set the package on the small counter in your room’s kitchen and opened the lid, brushing aside soft tissue paper.

The dress was ridiculously soft, made of fine, nearly translucent layers of chiffon. It was a lovely color, the sight making you suddenly think of the feeling in the air before a thunderstorm, the smell of rain. The ribbon matched.

You looked for a price tag and found none, but folded away at the bottom of the box was a hand written receipt. You paled at the figure displayed on it.

-Gojo, I can’t possibly accept this.

Don’t be stupid. No one would believe I was serious about a woman unless I was positively spoiling her rotten. s’not like it broke the bank!

-Forget the first-grade rec

-Pay my bills

Too late! Negotiations are closed :)

-So what the hell am I doing at this dinner?

Eating Duh and being seen with yours truly easy peasy right?

You sipped your coffee, keeping the mug well away from the dress. It was certainly nicer than anything you had ever owned in— well. Ever. It was hard to argue that there were clearly going to be some additional perks to this arrangement you hadn’t previously thought of.

Plus we gotta go over some ground rules

-Thought you said negotiations were closed

-This mean we can revisit my bills?

g2g

Students need me!

Ttyl babe

The ease in which that man showered you so soon with endearments was nauseating. Had he ever even had a girlfriend before? Or just those usual moon-eyed women who fawned and petted him?

And now everyone was gonna think you were one of those girls. You drank your coffee faster, relishing in the way it burned down your throat and overpowered the bad taste in your mouth.

“First-grade… first-grade. Remember the first-grade.”

And training. You’d squeeze every possible benefit from this arrangement out that you could. Sorcerers worked in teams, but at the end of the day, it was every man and woman for themselves.

Let them think what they want when you were seen tonight. You would come out on top.

***

The day passed quickly and you found yourself standing in front of the hotel mirror, twisting back and forth to get a feel for the movement of the dress— and half practicing staying upright in the heels that had arrived not even a moment later.

They were high enough to be appealing, but low enough to keep you from falling over on your face. Gojo had texted an explanation that he figured you were out of practice in wearing anything other than sneakers and combat boots and to consider them training wheels.

You’d wanted, once again, to punch him in the face.

The kind of girl he liked was a stilettos kinda girl, you guessed, huffing to yourself as you sat down and twirled one of your ankles, stretching the muscle. Even the low heels were not entirely comfortable, but you’d manage.

Checking your makeup one last time, you picked up your own worn purse and slung it over your shoulder. Women who wore these kind of dresses and came in on the arm’s of other men and women like Gojo never had anything more than the smallest clutch— but you weren’t those women.

You made your way down to the lobby and were surprised to find a chauffeur waiting outside with a very very sleek European car of some kind. You weren’t great about those kinds of things, only noting the seats were made with soft black leather and there was even a divider built in like in a limo to give the passengers privacy.

The chauffeur ushered you into the empty car and you sat back with a sigh as silently he delivered you to the next destination. You had, in some small place, hoped Gojo would already be present.

Why he felt the need for such spectacle was beyond you, but maybe this was what was expected of a clan family son when he courted a young woman. It felt— weird. Nice, but weird. The drive was not overly long, the car coming to stop.

You knew this restaurant. Some fancy French-Japanese fusion place that charged a hundred dollars for a single plate with a broiled pear covered in wasabi or some weird shit. Already you felt your stomach churning with anxiety and encroaching regret.

This was gonna suck.

This was gonna suck so bad.

The chauffeur opened the door and you barely managed not to wobble on the pavement. Feeling stilted and exposed as other guests and couples regarded you with open curiosity and veiled judgment.

Clearly they were used to seeing the same people come and go from this restaurant and you were not one of them.

You clutched your bag tighter to your arm, hand reaching inside instinctively to find your phone and text Gojo you were out. This was over. Find someone else— when your surname was shouted from the door.

All eyes turned as if in sync to Gojo, wearing simple trousers and a white shirt tucked in. He didn’t even have a tie or a jacket, his dark glasses obscuring his eyes even as he looked right at you.

A few people tsked their disapproval, but they may as well have been ghosts for all the attention Gojo paid them. When you didn’t immediately make your way over to him, Gojo shoved his hands into his pockets and strode over to meet you.

He grinned, the lowering of his chin and the slow rise back up an obvious indicator he was sizing you up and didn’t care if you knew.

He whistled.

“Ow, ow!”

“Shut it— you know this dress could cover my rent for half a year?! And these shoes! I could buy a used car with this ensemble.”

“You even drive?”

“Not the point.”

He laughed again, loud and careless.

“Figured since you were dawdling you might need an arm to lean on.” Gojo said, offering your his elbow without removing his hands from his pockets, “Or perhaps…”

He feigned a gasp, “Are you feeling shy?”

“I’m leaving.” you deadpanned, managing half a turn before his hand was on your waist, turning you back. He took your hand, the feeling of his palm on your side still burned into your skin as he hooked your arm in his own.

You allowed it, leaning on him only a little. He looked pleased, smugly so, as he led you inside and to a table that was already set for two.

There was a wine glass sitting by your own plate. The one by Gojo’s was turned upside down and set to the side… a can of soda sitting, bright and out of place, in its spot.

“… where did you even get that.”

“Vending machine.” Gojo said simply and even kicked your chair out a little for you to take a seat. How flattering.

“Wine is for you, if you want it. Figured it might help take the edge off.”

You rolled your eyes, not bothering to wait for the server to return and simply tipping the bottle of red into your own glass.

“What about you?”

“I don’t drink.” He said, cracking the tab on his soda with a loud pop. Several eyes filtered your way, whispers behind hands and napkins as Gojo all but drained the can in one gulp.

“So— ground rules?” you said, unfolding a cloth napkin and settling it in a half folded triangle across your lap the way you saw other women doing.

“Straight in, huh? Alright. Terms.” Gojo lifted one finger, “As already discussed, you and I will be ‘courting’— dating. Whatever the fuck. I’ll take care of arranging the dates, you show up, act sufficiently smitten and in about a year give or take, we break up.”

Gojo lifted a second finger, “Two. In exchange, I have two first grade sorcerers who will back your promotion. And, as requested—“ Gojo’s voice dropped a fraction, almost grumpily, “—you’ll come with me on my missions for your first semi-grade probation.”

“Now ground rules. At any point either of us wants out, it’s done. No questions asked. But don’t think that means you get to ditch and just keep that first grade appointment. I’ll make sure you end up right back at a grade two.”

You sipped your wine, giving your mouth something to do than form some very choice words at that moment. Gojo noticed, his smile almost a snarl, but the expression quickly vanished. You had a funny feeling trying to hoodwink or swindle him would end very poorly for anyone.

“And when you develop feelings for me—“

“If.” You amended quickly, but Gojo ignored you.

“—when you develop feelings for me. You have to tell me and again, the engagement is over. You can keep your rank. No harm no foul. I can hardly blame you for falling for me.” Gojo said with a wistful sigh. You were grateful for the arrival of the first course, forcing you both to fall silent for a moment until they departed.

You had no idea what was on the plate. Some kind of salad? It was hardly a mouthful. Gojo didn’t even touch his silverware and feeling less than impressed with the cuisine, you didn’t either.

You drank your wine.

“Barring sickness or injury you are required to appear for every date I set. Including the ones where you have to meet other members of the main family.”

You frowned, but didn’t object.

“Wait— what about you?”

“What about me?”

“Is the engagement off when you develop feelings for me?” You said lightly, trying to play off your smile as wistful.

Gojo scoffed, his reaction almost enough to hurt your feelings… just a little bit.

“Non-issue. I don’t do feelings.”

“God, you sound like a fuck boy.” The words came out before you could stop yourself, the last syllable off your tongue right at the moment the server had returned to reclaim your plates. An eyebrow was raised and you hid your face down with a flustered cough.

By the time you looked back up, you got the joy of seeing Gojo staring at you from over his glasses, a broad and deeply amused grin on his face.

“Not non-issue. If I get the feelings rule you get the feelings rule. End discussion.”

Gojo shrugged, again not touching the newest course which was, to your extreme annoyance, some kind of grilled pear.

“You should slow down.” He warned in a sing song voice as you poured another glass.

“I’m not a baby— okay. So we got terms, we got ground rules. Anything else?”

“You can’t refuse my gifts.”

Your eyes narrowed sharply and he simply smiled and hummed with a shrug.

“It’s for appearances! Oh. Speaking of appearances—“ Gojo sat up, fishing something from his back pocket and sitting it on the table. You stared at the simple black box, fearing a vein might burst in your forehead at any moment.

“What is that.” You stated more than asked.

“Open it.” Gojo said, his voice light and encouraging as he nudged the box closer, “Come on, open it. Open it. You know you wanna, sweetie, light of my life, fire of my lo—“

You snatched the box up if only to stop him from finishing that sentence.

You swallowed hard, the sounds of the room fading out as you flipped open the box and found, sitting upon a small satin pillow— a… key?

You lifted it from the box, noting it even had a little custom keychain made to look like a white cat with a tiny blindfold.

“It’s to my apartment!” Gojo announced with a giddy laugh, clasping his hands together in a way that was entirely un-adult like.

“… I have my own place. Thank you.”

“In Kyoto. This is here, in Tokyo. Where you will need to stay for this all to work, remember?”

“Where will you stay?” You asked dryly, vaguely hoping his answer would be something other than what it was no doubt going to be.

“Very funny. You’ll have your own room—if you want it.”

“Why—“ your voice nearly broke and you had to take a moment to clear it, “Why uh— why wouldn’t I be wanting my own room?”

“Feelings are off limits, naturally. But if you want to take me up again on that offer from back in the day…”

The surge of cursed energy that rippled off of you was so strong Gojo nearly toppled backwards, his laugh gaining a somewhat nervous lift to it if only for just a moment.

“I’ll have my own room. My own locked room.” You bit out, feeling your face flushing hot and hating every second Gojo seemed to be enjoying your utter mortification, “Unless that is a problem.”

“Nope. Not at all. Probably for the best ultimately, I’ve been told I have a bad habit of dickmatizing folks.”

“… I’m sorry, you what.”

“Dickmatizing! Ya know. Like hypnotizing but with—“

“I got it!” You groaned, pressing your face into your hand. When did it get so damn hot in here? You snatched up your wine glass and finished off the contents, feeling even hotter.

“Is that all?”

“Unless anything comes to your mind, then yep.” Gojo finished, ignoring yet another course. You were almost tempted. The dish was some kind of meat, but the sauce drenched over it smelt sharply of something bitter and sour at the same time. You stomach recoiled at the thought and yet rumbled in protest to its growing hunger.

“So what do you think?”

“You’re disgusting?” you said flatly.

“I meant about the deal.”

You glowered openly at him. It was going to take a lot of practice to turn that deprecating expression you felt naturally pull unto your face at his sight into something loving and tender… but for first-grade ranking? For lessons on your Limitless? Fuck. Fuck you’d do it.

You poured the remainder of the bottle into your glass and polished it off in one shot.

“I accept.”

Gojo clapped his hands together, “Excellent! Now let’s get the hell out of here.”

“Huh?” You barely managed to get the questioning sound out before Gojo was up and out of his chair. You scrambled up, head rushing with the wine and the weirdness of this entire conversation. By the time you managed to catch up with him, he snaked out his arm and wrapped it around your waist, pulling you flush and warm against his side.

You about threw him across the room, but your attempts at a grapple were thwarted by the sudden thrumming of the familiar Neutral Limitless ability, stalling your moments to such a small speed you felt suddenly frozen.

The impulse to toss him passed and instead you let him escort you outside where the car was still waiting.

“Take us to the place, ya know the one.” Gojo said to the driver and in a surprising show of gallantry, actually held the door open for you to get in first.

“And open the back window. If she throws up, I’d rather it be on the pavement.”

You elbowed him in the chest— accidentally of course.

***

The car drive was a bit longer, taking you away from the glitz and glamor of this side of Tokyo and to what looked arguably as one of the most hole-in-the-wall noodle joints you had ever seen. The street kitchen was small, the counter open outside with a few bar stools. The smells of teriyaki and spices and cooking oils were heavy in the air and made your mouth water.

Gojo perched on one of the stools and you came to sit alongside him, watching as he ripped open a set of chopsticks and rubbed the splinters off.

He ordered quickly—yakisoba and yakitori. Along with several packages of mochi they kept behind the counter in the same kinda plastic bags you’d find at a convenience store.

Gojo had been right— you should have slowed down. The world had a light haze to it… a slight tilting. His hand on your back felt massive and overly warm as he guided you back to sitting straight.

“Eat, ya lush.” He ordered, piling noodles and chicken unto a smaller empty plate for you from his own, “C’mon.”

Gojo popped one of the mochi bags and dumped the sticky sweet confection right on top of your yakisoba. You grimaced, picking the sweet off and trying to wipe some of the sauce from it before you took a generous bite.

The food was greasy and delicious and abundant and cheap and your mouth was in heaven. Even having not used your Limitless since yesterday, every taste still felt heightened. Maybe it was the way your cursed powers tried to compensate from the wine, but everything somehow was more delicious.

You attempted to snag another piece of yakitori from Gojo’s plate, only to have your chopsticks blocked with a clack.

“Ah ah ah— hands off.”

“What’s yours is mine, right?” You chided, only to be dodged again in a movement faster than your eyes could perceive. Did he just use his Limitless to counter you? Feeling emboldened, you activated your own, the faint pulse of the energy so close together giving you the sort of deflecting feeling one experiences when holding two sides of the same magnet near together.

Repelling, shifting. Trying to shove the energy into a way that the two forces would collide rather than deflect.

You were concentrating fully. The minuscule movements invisible to even your eyes, but the feeling was there. A sort of blindsight where you didn’t need the Six Eyes to tell you what was happening— but it would have definitely helped. You flicked a glance up and lost your control, your chopsticks shooting away and nearly cracking one in two.

Gojo chuckled. It was the expression on his face that had distracted you. His eyelids were half dropped, his smile soft as he readied himself to deflect you again. Your energy was no match for his… but it matched. It was made of the same stuff. Controlled the same way. He could see, with the sharp clarity of his Six Eyes, every tiny precise movement you made with your cursed energy. A mirror of his own abilities in miniature.

He was playing with you. And all the sudden you felt as if a small knot in your chest had shaken free, the coil coming undone.

Was there anyone else on this Earth you could do such a thing with?

Feeling strange and suddenly shy, you drew your energy back in and refocused on eating from your own plate, grumbling at your loss.

A second later, Gojo’s chopsticks moved over your plate, dropping another helping of noodles in.

A small concession. A victory in it's own right, even if it had not won the yakitori.

“Sober up, will ya? But don’t eat too fast. I’m not cleaning up vomit, no way, no how.”

“You’re always so vulgar.” you murmured, speaking around a mouthful of noodles and mochi. Gojo turned and stuck his tongue out at you. A confirmation or a reprisal, you couldn’t be sure.

But regardless, it did something to you he had never managed to do before.

It made you laugh.

[rocketink]

LOST AND FOUND

In which you lose your stuff all the time but your first-floor neighbour somehow always has it for you. Or, in a soulmate world, your soulmate finds everything you loses and reverse.

pairing: minghao x gender neutral reader

genre: fluff, crack + neighbor & soulmate! Au 

wc: 2.2k+

warnings: none I think (this type of soulamte thingy is kinda crazy tho). Btw this is my first au so I’m sorry fpr any mistakes!! + English is not my first language so apologies :)

notes: I migh turn this into a series since I’ve thought about some details here and there as I wrote this au?? What do you think?? 

The situation inside your apartment has turned unbearable, and you know should have moved with Joshua when you had the chance. He wasn't the closest of your friends, but you're sure it would have been more comfortable with him rather than third-wheeling your roommates.

Now, you don't hate Mingyu and your best friend, you just think they are disgustingly cute. You feel very happy since you've seen them pining after each other for a while now (all the furtive glances they sent to each other when they thought nobody was looking was like being inside a rom-com movie and it was hilarious at first. It eventually became too much to handle). You've never seen two more oblivious people inside a room, it was exasperating. Things began to turn serious when they discovered they were each other's soulmates and they've been seriously dating ever since.

It's great, really, but why do you have to see each of their displays of affection? Or, should we say, why doesn't the time to find your soulmate finally get to you?

Because you know, deep down inside you, that the problem is not that they have a soulmate. The problem is that you don't find it.

"Good morning, love." Mingyu greets your friend with his deep morning voice, and gives them a kiss on their temple. "Good morning, Y/n." He gives you a tiny hug and you growl.

"It's too early for being cute don't you think?" You ask joking-not-so-joking.

"Feeling grumpy at eight in the morning? Woah, breaking your own record." You laugh at what your friend says and they laugh too. You don't mind being like this, just why does it have to get so awkward sometimes?

"Guys another disgrace has happened." You announce solemnly. "I have lost my jacket"

"Again?" Mingyu judges.

"But didn't you wash it yesterday? It must be hanged with the rest of the clothes."

"I checked when I woke up because it's cold and it wasn't there."

"It was pretty windy last night, maybe it fell?" Your friend suggests and they grin. "Maybe Minghao will bring it back to you later?"

Ah, here we have the other reason why you want to move to a lost town somewhere in Australia: Xu Minghao, your first-floor neighbor, the one that has an apartment to envy because of his small, well-decorated courtyard. You don't envy that, though, because your clothesline is right on top of his courtyard, and sometimes he has to bring you all the clothing items that fall into his yard. You don't know how all that ends up there, you've tried everything: from securing your clothes with more pins to tying it to the clothesline. But none of that ever works, and he always goes all up to the third floor -where you live- to give it back to you with a smile and a 'see you soon'. How does he know it's your clothes? You made sure to tell him the first time this happened.

Just like your friend predicted, that afternoon Xu Minghao knocked at your door.

"Hello." He greets with a friendly smile and your heart melts.

He's too adorable to handle.

"Hi, Minghao. Don't bother I think I know why you're here." You joke at your own clumsiness and he laughs with you too.

"You must have been cold without it." He seems worried and you shake your head.

"Don't worry, two layers of blankets made up for it."

He puts his hands into his pockets and smiles shyly and you feel your heart bursting off. When he leaves, you notice your jacket smells like him.

Ah, how you wished Minghao was your soulmate.

Things get more complicated when the finals approach. You can barely stand even after drinking your daily coffee and you spend day after day coming and going from home to the library. You are so focused and stressed that you barely pay attention to anything else, and you've lost from pens to your entire case. All of them safely brought back home by Minghao. You do not know how or when you threw your case through the window for it to end up at Minghao's yard, but he always brings some hot chocolate and a small talk with him, so you do not complain.

After all, you don't even remember how you wake up every morning by the end of the day. You end up thinking you need to control yourself a little more during finals.

One day it gets out of hand. You've probably had the worst of the days. You woke up late because you didn't hear the alarm clock, your roommates being all lovey-dovey already got you on your nerves, your exam was harder than you expected and you had a bad feeling about your answers. Then, when you finally got home, late and tired, your keys were nowhere to be found. You could feel your eyes getting watery and you knocked at the door. Nobody answers, your friend and Mingyu are celebrating their anniversary and you don't want to bother them even if all you want is a hot shower and watching a romantic without friends to cuddle. You immediately think of Minghao, would it be too much if you asked him to spend some time with you? You answer to yourself that yes, it would be too much, there's no need to bother anyone else. So what do you do now?

"Y/n?" Somebody asks behind you.

"Minghao?" And there you have it, just the one you were thinking of.

"Hi, uhm, are you okay?" You want to cry to that question, but you manage to hold back your tears.

"I'm fine I just- I must have lost my keys because I can't find them and there's no one home and I just want to sleep." You explain briefly.

"Are these your keys?" He holds something in his left hand that looks like your keyring -a framed pink paper with your name on it and a little olaf your sister once bought you-

"How did you find it?"

"I didn't, it appeared in my yard". He is as confused as you are.

"But... I remember I put it inside the pocket of my bag." You explain. "When I arrived it was opened so I just supposed they fell out. And there's no way they fell into your yard because they are always inside my bag, I never threw them... Why would anyone throw a keyring through my window? I-" You try to explain without taking a breath so that Minghao doesn't think you're a weirdo, but now you can't fight back your tears and Minghao looks worried.

"It's okay Y/n, don't worry, I understand. Well, I don't, but I know you didn't do it. Hold on let's get inside I'll make you some hot chocolate and we can watch a movie, okay?"

You nod without thinking, just wanting to be lulled into some peace. He makes you some hot choco as promised and makes some small talk while choosing a movie to watch.

"So where are your roommates?" He asks.

"Celebrating their anniversary."

"Wait, are they dating?"

"Didn't you know?"

"No? I'm so shocked what the hell." You laugh at his astonished face. "But are they...?"

"Soulmates? Yes, they are."

"Woah, lucky."

"I know right." You don't want this topic to surface but you can't help but ask. "Have you met your soulmate?"

"I haven't." After a few seconds, he adds, "have you?"

"No, not a single clue of who they are. I don't have a timer or a tattoo, or see them in my dreams... I'm getting tired of waiting. Overall watching the two lovebirds every day of my life."

"It is the same thing for me. I'd love to meet them or just to know how they are. I know I'm young and all that but I'm just very curious and almost all my friends have met them while I still don’t know how to find them. I feel left out."

You nod, relating to that feeling.

"By the way, if it gets tiring, why don't you just move out?"

"I don't know where to move to be honest. I don't know if I want to go through the 'look for a new apartment' process again, it's too tiring. Besides, I still have fun with them, they're not to blame for my loneliness."

Minghao laughs and looks away.

"Just so you know, I'm moving out next month. I found another apartment for a better price and I'm going to leave the one I have now. If it gets too unbearable, you can just take my place." And you are too focused on yourself to notice the sad look on his face.

Because Minghao and your little encounters made your whole living in a student's apartment life better, and you don't want him to go away. But you are just a neighbor in Minghao's life, so who are you to tell him that?

Minghao moves the following month just as promised, and you can't remove the moping face you wear.

"Why are you so sad Y/n? I've seen the new neighbor, he is as hot as Minghao." Your friend winks and you roll your eyes.

"I don't care. If he doesn't pick up my stuff then I don't want him."

"I've heard he is all the time arguing with their other roommate. Maybe they leave sooner than expected and Minghao comes back!"

"Don't be mean, Gyu!" You nag and he shrugs.

Somebody's knocking at the door distracts you from your conversation and both of your friends turn to look at you.

"Why do I always have to get the door? There's no Minghao now, I don't want it."

"Maybe is your new blue prince"

"Shut up, Mingyu."

But when you open the door to a frowning Minghao, your heart backflips.

"What are you doing here Hao? Is everything okay?"

"I am a little concerned." He shows you a small necklace you recognize immediately. "What was this doing in my house?"

"I lost it last week at university! I didn't know where it went." You try to answer.

"To my room?"

"Look, I also don't know what was my necklace doing in your house in which I've never stepped a foot in because is like five kilometers away ... Oh my god Hao did you walk here?"

"I took the bus." He looks down and then right at you. "The last time I saw you you were wearing it. I've been thinking for a week how did this get there since I haven't seen you in a month, I never took it and I know for sure you are not a stalker who would leave their necklace inside my room when nobody’s looking."

"Have you reached any conclusion?"

"Absolutely none. Then I talked to Jun and he said some of the romantic trash he usually thinks of, but this made me think."

"What did he say?" You don't know what direction this conversation is taking.

"He's a soulmate expert you know? He told me that maybe it’s because destiny wants us to meet again and I thought that couldn't be because oh god, what have I done to deserve you? Then I decided to make a little experiment and I'm really nervous because if this doesn't work out I might have lost the most important thing to me. Do you mind checking your room?"

You feel everything inside you revolving because of every single one of his words, but still, you do as he requests. You check your room, ignoring the question marks over your roommate's heads, and find nothing different. Except for a new notebook on top of your nightstand you hadn't noticed. It's a sketchbook, and all of the drawings on the inside are signed with Minghao's name.

"Is this yours?" He sighs in relief when he recognizes the sketchbook.

"This is a part of my life, you know?"

"Then how did you lose this?"

"I told June to leave it somewhere I didn't know so that I couldn't even look for it. I wasn't sure if it was going to work."

"I can't believe the universe does works like this."

"Me neither, but I'm glad it did."

"So, you said this friend of yours is an expert in soulmates?" You don't want to ask it directly, but you want to know if he's implying that you two are soulmates.

"Yes, I used the s word." You both laugh.

"Does this mean that you and I... You know."

"Jun told me this type of soulmate is rare, but it has happened under easier circumstances. All I know is that I keep finding you every time and I don't know if I ever want to stop finding you."

"OH COME ON JUST KISS ALREADY." You hear Mingyu shouting from the kitchen. "Babe, now I know how Y/n felt with us."

You want to laugh at Mingyu and tell him 'Ha, suffer you loser', but Minghao has other plans.

When he kisses you everything just seems simple and suddenly everything is fine, and you don't want to stop doing it. It's warm, it feels as if you had lost and found the most important thing in your life.

"Hold on then why did I never find anything yours?"

"Y/n, you break the kiss just to ask this?" You blush and he sighs. "I'm a very organized person, unlike others, so I barely lose things, happy now?"

"No. Does this mean that if I get lost in a crowd would you magically find me? You know, since I got lost."

"I don't know Y/n, and I don't want to find out. Now come here, I want to cuddle."

"Oh, yes. Finally."

[equalseleventhirds]

i said i wouldn't write it but i did

vaguely a sequel to this, but far in the future and focused on jon (annabelle features briefly tho. she's fine. annabelle will always be fine in my fics.) with ofc the presupposition that they've failed in one world but kept trying, bcos i think that would be fun*!

*(by which i mean heartbreaking, i'm so sorry)

There are rules, to the traveling, or at least there seem to be. There are certainly questions to be asked and points to be made, about how many instances count as a definitive rule rather than simply a pattern. But Jon likes to think of them as rules. He's always preferred concrete answers, even if it turns out they're less the truth and more just a convenient way of conceptualizing things.

So he has rules.

First: the Fears always come through on the same day. October 18, 2018. Or, given the impact history has on calendars, the equivalent of it; he'd once spent months trying to correlate the forty-third moon of cycle 1852 with his calendar just to prove his point, but the math had all worked out.

(Which does indicate, at least to Jon, that yes, the Fears probably did originate in his home world, Georgie. He'll take his petty wins where he can get them. For as long as he can remember the discussion, and the people, he's proving wrong.)

Second, it is still his tapes that the Fears follow. For every apocalypse there has been a new catalyst, but none of these new rituals supersede his. Maybe it's a testament to the strength of the Web's original plan, or maybe it's just something about Jon himself. He knows what he thinks, but... well, there isn't enough proof just yet.

Third, in spite of endless attempts to trap them and stop them, Jon is always able to travel with the Fears. Perhaps they simply can't stop him, as the original antichrist he apparently is; dozens of apocalypses in dozens of different universes, and Jon can always feel his rightful place as ruler of that terrible fearscape calling to him. He hasn't taken it yet, but it's there, and the Eye cannot abandon its true pupil without his permission.

Or perhaps they simply don't care. Every attempt so far has led to the exact same result, after all: another world left behind, another death by starvation averted, another new feast for the Fears to sink their teeth into.

Fourth, he always passes out upon entering a new world.

It's kind of annoying.

---

It is slightly unusual for him to wake up warm, comfortable, and covered in a blanket, but Jon's not about to complain. It's nice. He doesn't get a lot of comfort, and he likes sleeping in a bed, especially since he's always eldritch-nightmare-free in a new world. For a limited time only, of course.

He's fairly certain he's inside; aside from the softness underneath and around him, the air is still and temperate, the light through his eyelids is artificial, and all he can hear is the faint whirring of appliances and the whispers of two muted voices.

"—complete stranger, definitely dangerous, looks like he's from hell—"

"Okay, fine, but I wasn't going to leave him, and anyway haven't you noticed he's a bit—"

"A bit what? Scarred? Bloodstained? Glowing eyes, because I don't think I need to remind you, Martin, his eyes were absolutely glowing when you found him—"

Martin. Now there's a name. Not an uncommon one, but... he thinks he knows that voice.

Or. Well. He might know both of those voices, actually, which is even more interesting than waking up in a bed.

Jon opens his eyes.

He's met himself before, is the thing. Not in every world, and not always particularly recognizable, but he's met himself. He's met versions of Martin, too, and eventually stopped going completely useless with heartbreak every time. The merest handful of times, he's found both of them in the same world, sometimes something almost like friends, but usually not.

The fact that they have their arms around each other, casual, comfortable, close, is both entirely unexpected and perfectly, wonderfully, terribly familiar. Jon briefly considers crying about it, but there are more important things to be doing. For example.

"The glowing eyes aren't actually that sinister. I mean, they are, but not for the reasons you're probably thinking."

Jon—the other Jon—jumps at the sound of his voice, then leans forward. Curiosity, of course; that hardly ever seems to change. "You—the glowing—who are you?"

"Jon," this new version of Martin scolds, and for just a moment he's back home, with his Martin, with that exasperated tone—but no, this isn't his Martin, and he's also leaning forward now, his voice turning gentle. Concerned. Coaxing, like he's a spooked animal, and Jon doesn't think his Martin has ever talked to him that way. "How are you feeling? We found you unconscious in the street."

He can feel Martin's curiosity too, pushing forward under his concern, just as questioning as Jon but too polite to outright say it yet. He has to cut this off, or he really will cry.

"Mm... no," he says. "Well, yes. But also." Good lord, he's confusing them. Par for the course, but he should probably try to be somewhat comprehensible.

He holds up a hand, extending one finger. "I am... fine. More or less. Trust me, I'm used to this, and this isn't even the worst way it's happened." Another finger joins the first. "My name, as I believe Martin has guessed but then dismissed, is Jonathan Sims. I am not you from the future, nor am I lying, nor am I crazy, because—" a third finger "—interdimensional travel is not only possible, it has happened, is happening, because of and along with terrible monstrosities I am determined to stop, and I have explained this too many times to too many people to have much patience for anyone being shocked and disbelieving, much less a version of myself doing so, so you can either get over it and move on or I can go elsewhere and do something useful."

"Excuse—"

"And," he continues, pushing himself up so he can sit and lean forward even more intensely than his counterpart, "I would actually rather not do that just yet, because I have an extremely pressing question for the two of you."

"Um," Martin says, and "What," says the other Jon.

"How," Jon asks, deepening his voice to exude solemn, ominous, and eldritchly important, "did you two start dating?"

---

It was so... normal. Apparently. Two people, mutual friends, a chance encounter. A prickly exterior ("He hated me," both of them had claimed), but without the insecurity of being Head Archivist and the fear of dread powers beyond his comprehension, their friends had helped him open up and—eventually—apologise. A budding friendship, and then a romance, and then...

It isn't a version of them Jon has seen anywhere else, in any of the worlds he's traveled to. Normal as it is, it's a highly improbably scenario, and certainly not the same as his relationship with his Martin had been. But it was, in an infinite number of worlds, still a possibility.

Jon isn't quite sure how he feels about that, knowing that some version of them could have fallen in love without the trauma, but that they hadn't managed it.

His hands aren't shaking, as he lights his cigarette. At least there's that.

"I quit, you know," his counterpart says from behind him. "Years ago. I'd forgotten about those until you asked."

"Well then, thank you for indulging me." He gestures, meaning the cigarette, meaning the bed, meaning his claims about reality, meaning his intrusive, gossipy questioning. Meaning everything. He's not sure it gets across.

The other Jon laughs, quietly, and moves to stand next to him. "I am my worst enabler."

"Oh, that's hardly true."

"Mm." They're silent together for a while, but Jon is restless (both of him), and eventually this reality's version opens his mouth to ask. "Do you—do you know why I—I don't want to say believed you, I'm still not sure I do, b-but, didn't throw you out immediately?"

"My myriad charms?" They both laugh at that.

"Jonathan Sims," he says, as if that explains anything.

Jon takes a drag of his cigarette, considering. He could probably Know, but... indulging himself. "What about me?"

"No, not you, or. You know. You. But your name. Jonathan Sims. I decided you weren't, weren't a deliberate lie to trick me, or a future version of myself, or a mind-reading monster—"

"Well—"

"—when you said your name, because none of those things would have said that." He smiles then and holds up a hand, and—oh—his ring glints. "I've been Jonathan Blackwood for a while now."

They'd told him married eventually, but he hadn't even thought about his name. He's certainly thinking about it now. "Jonathan Blackwood," he says, soft, to himself. And to himself. "That... that sounds good."

"It does, doesn't it."

Whatever they might have said next is lost as an incredibly loud engine roars nearby and a sleek black motorcycle pulls up in front of them. Jon sighs and takes one last drag of his cigarette as the rider removes her helmet.

"Been off finding yourself, then, Jon?" Annabelle asks.

"Oh, extremely funny, yes. Did you steal that?"

"It was a gift."

"Of course it was."

The other Jon is staring at them both, his eyes repeatedly drifting back to the web-covered hole in Annabelle's head. "Who—what is—is that a—"

"She's a spider monster," Jon supplies helpfully. "She came with me, although apparently she did not pass out in the street this time."

"Two streets over, I think. Pity, I would've loved a nice nap in a proper bed, but I did get this motorcycle out of it. Come on, Jon, you can mope on the way."

"I have not been moping—"

"Haven't you? You're not the one who deals with how maudlin you get every time you meet yourself—"

"Yes, fine, thank you, we can go." He stubs out the cigarette and pauses, looking at himself. "Uh. Tell Martin—well, goodbye, I guess. I'd say I hope we meet again, but if you're lucky we won't need to?"

"...sure."

"And I'm—I hope you—that is, I'll do my best—well." He sighs. "Things are about to get... dicey, for the world in general. But just, look out for each other, and we'll try to handle the rest."

"Jon, we should be going."

"Yes, all right, all right." He gives himself one last, probably not very reassuring smile, and climbs on behind Annabelle.

They do have work to do, after all.

[whatdoesshedotothem]

Saturday 19 December 1835

8 ¾

11 ½

No kiss  ready in 55 minutes - two motions but of a nice clean yellow colour  bowel complaint yesterday but dark coloured and not pure as now.  Very fine morning - sun shining and F35°  and the flags quite dry now at 9 ¾ at which hour went down to breakfast - sat talking to A- till 10 - out at the cascade bridge Rockwork - Robert Mann + 3 removing the clay from the bottom of Rockwork the [?] moved before  to near the garden wall - Mallinson and his boy here - did up the farmyard necessary hung the door of this and of the boiler place and made boiler lid, and made and hung one pigsty door - the other done before - at 11 ¼ down the old bank to H-x - to the Yorkshire District bank - got £150 - then to Whitley’s - told Booth to make out my bill and to be on the lookout for Beckmann’s work - then to Mr Parker’s - paid him £45 twenty for William Green and £25 for Mr. Nelson - nothing to be paid the later but on a written order from Mr Harper or Mr Husband once a week supposed it would be £25 - told Mr P- I would pay my aunt - he was to keep the navigation divided for the weekly payments to Nelson - Mr P- said the Nelsons were good workmen, but had no money - I feared I should be obliged to employ Brian Helm - Mr P- said BH was not much better - none of them had any money - difficulty now in transferring an Inn licence from one house to another then said I, I will have nothing to do with Miss W-‘s belonging to her new purchase - returned up the old bank and home about 12 ¼ - at the Rockwork a few minutes - Holt came to me there - said there were 35 yards done of the pheying at Walker pit - still find water in the drift - may be enough to fill a one-inch bore pipe with a pressure upon it - or enough to fill a 2 in. bore pipe with a common (unforced) cement - Told Holt the Listerwick Engine pit cabin was to be 6 yards x 4 yards - while the man were at dinner came in and sat an hour with A- then out again - at the tail goit Gave Joseph Mann the key of Whiskam cottage - told him I should plant a hedge of something round the garden leaving it of such dimensions as I thought fit  and that he must sign a written agreement - to leave at 2 month’s notice - he thought that rather too little notice - but I said it was the same sort of agreement as I had made before - Joseph to manage the bar - mentioned his being sworn in [a] special constable - he told me his daughter was en famille within 2 or 3 months of her confinement - not going to be married - a worthless young man about 19 the father of 2 other natural children - said I was very sorry - could not do with her being confined at Whiskum cottage - and Joseph promised to get her off for the time - he said it was a great trouble to him - I told him if I was in his [place] I would give the fellow such a licking as he never had in his life before - then at the Rockwork again at the Lower fishpond - at the Lodge and about till came in at 5 ¼ - dressed -  helped A- with her note to Mrs Dyson A- and I went to my aunt at 6 for a minute or 2 together and I remained afterwards ¼ hour with my aunt - dinner at 6 ½ in ¾ hour - then went to my aunt for ½ hour (rather better tonight) then coffee - then A- and I with my father and Marian - then wrote all the above of today till 9 10 - Letter tonight from the Herald’s college from Mr George H. Rogers Harrison Bluemanthe fearing that, as I had said in August last when at the college I would in a month send the family pedigree to have some additions made - either there was some mistake or if the roll had been sent it might be lost - tea at 9 ¼ - ½ hour with my aunt till 10 ¼  at which hour F29° and fine frosty night - fine day - frosty in the afternoon and sharpish frost by five pm - my aunt seems cheerful and rather better tonight but she cannot get the better of the fluttering at her chest - I think she cannot continue very long tho’ she talks of being better in a few days, and seems to have no idea of her danger.

[maybeimamuppet]

I think I wanna marry you

hello friends!! this is a request fill for Aubrey_Plaza_Stole_HappiestSeason on ao3.

also, in a previous work, I said cady's middle name was Allison just because I liked the way it sounded, but I was browsing Erika henningsen's instagram and found that she calls her cady Jane as in Jane Goodall, and I like that much better. so, its Jane now. enjoy!

-

“Damian!” Janis calls from the bedroom she shares with Cady in their New York apartment.

“What?!” He calls back.

“Is Caddy home?” She asks loudly, wondering why one of them didn’t just go to the other.

“No!”

“Then come here!”

He comes strolling in casually with a bagel, chewing a mouthful. “Wha’ you wan’?”

“Finish chewing, I don’t want you to choke,” Janis demands, knowing him well. He listens, thankfully, swallowing his bite and coming to sit next to her on the bed.

“Okay, what is it?”

“I want to propose to Caddy,” Janis rushes out. Exactly as she expected, he sucks in a large gasp, dropping his bagel to press a hand over his heart. “Can you help me?”

“Yes!” He says excitedly. “Oh my god, finally!”

“Finally? We’re twenty-two, dude,” Janis says, confused. She’d thought they were a bit young to be thinking of marriage.

“Literally everyone in our friend group expected you to get engaged before we started college and elope,” Damian responds, leveling her with a single look.

“We’d only been dating for, like, four and a half months by the time you and I left, what the hell kind of toxic relationship did you think we have?!” Janis demands.

“You two were absolutely revoltingly in love, you would’ve done it and found a way to make it work. I’m just glad you’ve calmed down a little,” Damian jokes.

“Hm,” Janis huffs, thinking. They had gotten into things pretty quickly in high school. Their temporary long distance relationship had actually done them a lot of favors. “Anyway, can you help me?”

“Yes, of course! How do you want to do it?” He asks, lying down on his tummy and taking another bite of his bagel.

“I was thinking when we go home for Christmas? Like, on Christmas Eve, maybe. I wanted to take her to some fancy ‘holiday’ dinner and then take her on a walk to the clearing by that pond where we had our first date, and propose there?” She says quickly. She’s planned it for a while, but she still wants to make sure it doesn’t sound dumb.

“Aww,” Damian coos. “That sounds great, she’ll love it. What do you want me to do?”

“Help me pick a ring, first of all. And then, since you’re coming back to Illinois with us, help me decorate the place with, like, candles and pretty lights and stuff?” Janis asks, looking to him for approval again.

“Done. You wanna go shopping now?” He asks, shoving the rest of his bagel in his mouth.

“Um... yeah, why not? I’ll be ready in a minute,” She says, pushing him to the door.

————-

Little did Janis know, Cady was across town with Regina, Gretchen, and Karen coming up with a proposal plan of her own. She’d asked them out on a coffee get-together, trying to bribe them into helping her plan everything.

“Hey, Cady!” Gretchen calls from across the café where she’s standing, flanked by her girlfriends. Cady stands to hug them, she’s been so busy working on her PhD that she hasn’t been able to see them much lately.

“Hi! I ordered for all of us, we’re over here,” she says, leading them to a table in the far corner.

“It’s so good to see you, it’s been forever,” Regina says, sitting across from her with Karen, and Gretchen next to Cady.

“Yeah, I’ve missed you guys! My schoolwork is kicking my ass lately,” Cady huffs. “How have you been?”

“Good! We got an axolotl!” Karen says excitedly.

“Aww! I love those, but we can’t have any pets at all in our apartment,” Cady says sadly. “What did you name it?”

“Louboutin,” Gretchen says with a happy smile. “Gina wants to give him a sibling named Gucci.”

“Aww. I wanna come meet him soon,” Cady says.

“Oh, absolutely! We’ll have a girls night soon once our schoolwork eases up a little,” Regina says happily. “What about you, how have you been?”

“Oh, you know. About as good as a PhD student can be,” Cady says with a chuckle. “But really, I’ve been fine. Um, I actually wanted to ask a favor of you guys.”

“Ooh, ulterior motive! What do you need?” Gretchen asks excitedly, still hungry for gossip like she was in high school.

“I want to propose to Janis,” Cady says quickly. All three girls squeal loudly and wrap her in a hug, Regina and Karen leaning over the table and nearly spilling their drinks.

“When?” Karen asks excitedly once they’ve sat back down.

“Where?” Regina adds.

“I was thinking Christmas Eve when we all go back home? Our first date was in this beautiful clearing in the woods by that pond, I was going to do it there,” Cady says quietly.

“Aww,” the three of them coo in the same tone at the same time. It’s frightening how in sync they are, sometimes.

“So what do you need us for?” Karen asks.

“I was hoping you guys could help me pick a ring, and set up the area once the day comes? If you can,” Cady asks. “And Regina, could you take photos? Like, hidden somewhere? I can pay you for them.”

“Yes I can, and no you will not. You’re my best friend, you get free pictures,” Regina says, shaking with excitement.

“You don’t have to do that, Gina,” Cady says, feeling guilty now.

“Cady, honey, I’m still rich. I don’t need your money. Think of it as a favor for me, I need more practice with photographing people anyway.”

“Okay,” Cady says. “Anyway, are you guys free next weekend to go ring shopping?”

“Yes,” all of them say together again.

“Okay then,” Cady giggles. “What have you guys been up to?”

————-

On November first, Regina is sitting on the sofa in her apartment, reading through some emails for work and sipping her favorite peppermint tea. She decides to take a break when her phone pings with a text; her back is starting to bother her anyway.

She stands up to stretch as she checks it, trying not to be too surprised when she finds it’s from Janis.

snarkisian: hey reggie are u going home for christmas ??

notreginald: Yes, why?

snarkisian: are u busy on christmas eve ??

notreginald: Depends on what time. What do you need?

snarkisian: i’m gonna propose to caddy that night and i was wondering if you’d take some pics of it

snarkisian: i’ll pay u for them obviously

Regina sucks in a gasp. They’re planning on proposing on the same night?

notreginald: Aww, congratulations! I’ll see if I’m free, where and when are you planning on doing it? And you don’t have to pay me.

snarkisian: the clearing in the woods where we had our first date, around nightfall. i’m gonna take her to a fake christmas dinner first tho

So, they have exactly the same proposal plan. How cute.

notreginald: Let me check my calendar. I should be free.

She lied, she needs to talk to Damian immediately.

georgewashington: HUBBARD WE HAVE A SITUATION

damecupboard: What happened who do I need to kill

georgewashington: What? Nobody. But Janis and Cady want to propose to each other on the same night and in the same place.

damecupboard: HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLT SHIT

georgewashington: Holt.

damecupboard: Bitch leave me alone

damecupboard: They have the exact same proposal plan??

georgewashington: Exactly the same, except Janis wants to take Cady to dinner first. Cady asked us to help get the area set up beforehand a while ago and asked me to take their engagement pics.

georgewashington: And Janis just texted me asking to take pictures for HER proposal.

damecupboard: Shit

damecupboard: They probably both want the same setup, we could work together and then stick you in a bush or smth

georgewashington: Works for me, other than the bush. I’ll text you later to find out what we need to order. Love you 📷

damecupboard: Bye Reggie!!

She switches back to her text thread with Janis.

notreginald: I’m totally free in the evening that day, so it should work out.

snarkisian: tits! are u sure i can’t pay u??

notreginald: I don’t want your money, Jan. Just spell correctly for once in your life.

snarkisian: noh

notreginald: Figures.

————-

About a week later, Janis and Cady are having their weekly date night. Every Saturday they make a commitment to go on a date. Sometimes they go out for dinner, sometimes they go see a movie, and other times they just go for a walk around the city and chat, catching up on the events of the week.

Tonight, they decide to do one of their favorite things: stay home. Damian has an evening audition and won’t be home until late, so they have the apartment to themselves.

They order in some Indian food, deciding not to cook this time since they’re both exhausted from the week. It’s peaceful, eating their dinner sitting across from each other on the floor, using the coffee table as a dinner table. They chat about how Janis’ work has been, what paintings she’s been doing in her off time, how Cady’s schoolwork is going, little things like that.

Cady cuddles in on top of Janis as they watch a movie, falling asleep slightly as Janis plays with her hair. It’s only about seven in the evening, but she’s so tired and Janis is so warm.

She about jumps out of her skin when Janis’ phone goes off. Their usual rule is no phones on date night, but they both are waiting on some important information so made an exception for tonight. Janis checks the message, her eyes going wide when she sees what it is.

“Cads, I’m really sorry, I have to go,” She says frantically, Cady frowning at her as she’s removed from her embrace.

“Go where? It’s late,” Cady pouts. Janis has never left date night before.

“Um... a work thing,” Janis says. “Emergency. I shouldn’t be more than an hour. Maybe hour and a half.”

It’s clearly a lie, Janis teaches art and tutors English down at their local middle school. None of her students would have an emergency this late on a Saturday night.

“Janis, you’re a teacher, what emergency could possibly happen this late at night? On a weekend?” Cady asks, rubbing her eyes.

“Uhm... not that work, something happened to one of my commissions down at the studio. I have to go check on it.” Janis says, proud of how quickly she came up with that.

“Oh. Okay,” Cady responds, still eyeing her suspiciously. “Be safe.”

“I will. I have my pepper spray,” Janis says, coming to kiss her goodbye quickly. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

And with that, Cady is left alone. She decides to clean up after their dinner, throwing the containers away and washing the dishes they used. She’s deep in thought as she scrubs away at a plate.

She definitely lied to me, she wouldn’t even look me in the eye. And she spent forever picking that studio because she wanted somewhere good, if something happened to one of her works someone would have known how to fix it.

So where could she have gone? On date night? What was so important? Did she get invited to do something else? With someone else? Maybe I’ve gotten boring. I can’t be very interesting to talk to, all I’ve got going on is school.

That thought makes her pause. Janis couldn’t be sick of her. Could she? Cady takes a deep breath, switching to grab a towel to dry the dishes. She’s been down this road before, she knows she shouldn’t jump to conclusions. But maybe she’ll take time to gather some more evidence first before telling Janis how she’s feeling. That’s probably not a terrible idea.

-

Janis rushes to the subway station near their apartment, even more on edge than she normally is in public. She’d gotten a text notification that the ring she and Damian had chosen was ready, and wants to go check since she’ll be busy making Thanksgiving preparations soon. The shop closes in an hour and is about forty-five minutes away, so she has to hurry.

The shopkeeper looks a little startled when she throws the door open and dashes in, so Janis pauses for a second to make sure she doesn’t look like a robber. She smooths her hair and clothes and heads up to the counter at a much slower pace.

“Um, hi, sorry. I got a text that an engagement ring I ordered is ready?” She says gently.

The employee looks relieved upon realizing Janis isn’t crazy, sighing quietly. “Oh, that’s perfectly understandable. What’s the name for the order?”

“Sarkisian,” Janis responds, bouncing slightly on the balls of her feet.

The employee heads into a back room, returning after a second with a small velvet box. “Here you are.”

Janis opens the box, gasping gently at what she sees. She’d seen it to pick the style, obviously, but something about seeing it in Cady’s size and presented in the fancy box makes it so much more real.

She’d stolen one of Cady’s less fancy rings  to get her size, and when she compares them it’s a perfect match. “This is perfect, thank you so much.”

“Not a problem, ma’am. Best of luck with the proposal.”

This guy is disgustingly polite, she thinks as she heads for the door. “Thank you!” She calls over her shoulder just before she reaches the door.

Once she’s left, she pulls out her phone to text Damian.

janjan: hey i just picked up the ring

janjan: can we meet somewhere so i can give it to u? caddy will be sus if i immediately go to hide something when i get home

damdam: !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

damdam: Yeah I just finished my audition. I’ll be at that noodle place we like, meet me there

janjan: 📷

It’s about a block and a half away from where she is, so she sort of power-walks her way over. She’s still panting slightly by the time she reaches him.

“Lemme see,” Damian demands as soon as he sees her. Janis pulls the box out of her pocket, flipping the lid open to show him. “Oh, Jan, it’s so pretty.”

“Do you think Caddy’ll like it?” Janis asks, shutting it again and handing it over. She’s a little nervous about letting it out of her sight, but she honestly trusts him with it more than herself.

“Of course, Janjan. You picked it for a reason, she’ll love it,” Damian says as he puts it safely in his coat pocket.

“It’d better be worth it. I feel bad, I left in the middle of date night,” Janis says nervously.

Damian pats her shoulder comfortingly. “She’ll understand, Jan. Eventually.”

“I hope so,” Janis mumbles. “Dame?” She asks after a beat.

“Hmm?”

“Why didn’t we just meet at the station?”

“I want noodles.”

————-

They decide to have Thanksgiving with all three of their families together, since everyone was coming to them instead of the other way around. For New York, their apartment is fairly large, but it’s still quite cramped with everyone present.

Janis can cook well enough, but she had recently dropped an entire watermelon on the floor and was subsequently banned from helping prepare any of the meal. She’s in charge of keeping everything presentable while Damian entertains.

So, Cady is preparing the meal with her own mother, as well as Janis’. Ms. Hubbard and Damian both offered to help as well, but their little kitchen isn’t big enough for any more people. Cady is left alone with Ms. Sarkisian as her own mother heads to the restroom, deciding to ask the million dollar question now.

“Ms. Juliette, can I ask you something?” Cady asks. Janis’ mother had insisted on Cady calling her by her first name, but she never quite managed it. Her compromise is still using the title in front of her name. It suits them both well enough.

“Of course, hon,” Ms. Sarkisian says, basting the turkey.

Cady looks quickly to make sure Janis isn’t around before she speaks, talking quietly. “Um... I’m planning on proposing to Janis, around Christmas. I’d like to ask your blessing.” Cady has a feeling it’ll be given, but she’s nervous. They’re still very young, Janis is barely twenty-three.

Ms. Sarkisian gasps happily and comes to hug her. “Of course you have my blessing, I’ve been waiting for this day since you two first started dating. Welcome to the family, honey.”

Cady hugs her back tightly, relieved she agreed. “Thank you.” She hopes she’ll actually be welcomed to the family. Janis has still been acting odd.

-

Janis is ambling around in the living room, out of things to keep tidy for the moment. She’s trying to work up the nerve to talk to Cady’s parents.

When Mrs. Heron comes through to use the restroom, she realizes she might only have this moment to ask them. She takes some deep breaths, standing a little ways away from the bathroom to wait for Cady’s mother.

“Oh, hello, Janis,” Mrs. Heron says as she comes back, wiping some excess water on her pant legs.

“Uh, hi, Mrs. Heron,” Janis stutters. “Can-could I talk to you and Mr. Heron really quick? Um, alone?”

“I’ve told you to call me Betsy, dear. And yes, I’ll go get Chip,” Cady’s mother replies. She returns with her husband after a second, both looking slightly concerned. “Now what is this about?”

Janis swallows and puffs out her chest slightly for confidence. “Uhm, I want to propose to Cady. She loves you two more than anything, so I wanted to ask your blessing.”

Mrs. Heron gasps happily, coming to hug her. Mr. Heron is more stoic, but she sees tears brimming in his eyes.

“Oh, you absolutely have our blessing, dear. Welcome to the family,” Mrs. Heron says.

“Thanks,” Janis breathes. Betsy leaves after that and returns to her daughter in the kitchen. Mr. Heron wraps her in another awkward hug, eventually giving up and pulling back to shake her hand instead.

“You have my blessing. But if you hurt my baby girl, you’ll never see the light of day again,” He says ominously. “Take care of her. Welcome to the family.”

“Um...I don’t plan on it, sir, thank you,” Janis stumbles. “I promise I’ll take care of her.”

“I know you will, I just have to make sure of these things as her father,” Chip replies. “I’ll tell her to do the same for you whenever you propose.”

Janis feels tears prick at her eyes. She knows her mother is protective, but having an actual father figure is nice. “Thank you.”

“You’re welcome, Janis.”

-

They head back to the living room, where everyone else is waiting. Janis shoots Juliana a look, gesturing for her to come over to her.

“What’s up, Janny?” Her sister asks.

“You have to swear to be quiet if I tell you, Caddy can’t know,” Janis threatens.

Juliana looks at her oddly. “Okay.”

Janis pulls out the ring box, prompting a gasp from her sister. Julie slaps a hand over her mouth, squealing into it and doing a little happy dance. “I get another sister! Finally!”

“Shh,” Janis demands. “But yes, hopefully. I’m trusting you with this. I’m gonna propose at Christmas. Can you take this home with you and keep it safe somewhere?”

Julie’s eyes go wide, shocked at the amount of trust her big sister has in her. “Yeah, absolutely. Have you told Mama?”

“No, I’m going to whenever she takes a break. She’s with Caddy, I haven’t been able to get her away.”

“Can I see it?” Julie asks, cradling the ring box carefully and opening it when Janis nods. “Oh, damn. She’s a lucky lady.”

Janis laughs, ruffling her hair. “Thanks, kid, glad you approve.”

“What are we approving, girls? What are you scheming?” Their mother asks as she comes to take a short break from the cooking.

Julie looks to Janis, letting her share the news. “I’m proposing to Caddy. Probably on Christmas Eve.”

Her mom raises her eyebrows, smiling widely when she realizes that they both have the same plan. She comes to hug her, trying to hide her reaction and keep Cady’s proposal a surprise. “Congratulations, baby girl.”

“She hasn’t said yes yet, mama,” Janis reminds her, returning her hug.

“Do you think she’s going to say no?” Juliana asks jokingly.

Janis pauses. “No.”

“Then let her congratulate you, Janny. She’s gonna say yes.” Julie says.

“Okay. Thank you.”

-

“Mom, Daddy, can I talk to you?” Cady asks when Janis goes to grab a second plate from the kitchen.

“Always, binti,” her father replies.

“I’m going to propose to Janis,” Cady says in Swahili just in case Janis is listening. “On Christmas Eve.”

Her parents lock eyes, smiling at each other as they discover each girl has the same plan.

“Congratulations, darling. Treat each other well,” her mother says, trying to stop grinning.

“We will. I love you,” Cady replies as she comes to hug them. She misses the look they shoot Ms. Sarkisian over her shoulders.

-

Once their families leave, headed back home to Illinois in the morning, Janis and Cady have a moment alone in the kitchen as Damian tidies up the living room and heads to bed.

Cady comes up behind Janis as she finishes washing the last few dishes, wrapping her arms around her waist and popping up on her tippy toes to kiss her cheek before squishing her cheek against Janis’ back.

“Hi, baby,” Janis says as she switches to grab another plate.

“Hi,” Cady says. “Today was nice.”

Janis finishes her last dish and turns around, leaning to kiss Cady’s forehead and pulling her in for a tighter hug. She dances them around the kitchen, to a song that exists only in her head. Cady giggles when Janis spins her out and then pulls her back in to kiss her sweetly.

“It was nice. I love you,” Janis says.

“I love you too. I’m thankful for you,” Cady replies, popping up to kiss her again. Janis chuckles, kissing her back.

“I’m thankful for you too, Butterfly. Let’s go to bed, I’m exhausted,” Janis yawns.

“Okay, my love. I’m little spoon tonight,” Cady says.

“Fine.”

————-

Thanksgiving was comforting, but Janis continues acting oddly. She seems distracted, and nervous. Whenever Cady is around she seems on high alert, and spends most of her free time on her phone texting someone. Cady is worried.

On their next date night, Cady decides to go all out. She had told Regina about how strange Janis was acting and asked for advice. She had two girlfriends, after all. Regina had suggested being a bit more bold with her affections to see how Janis responded and going from there.

They have the apartment for the night since Damian is having a sleepover with Karen. They had formed a special bond over the years. They have get togethers every now and again, occasionally joined by Janis and Cady, and every once in a while Regina and Gretchen would join too. It’s cute.

Cady made reservations at their favorite Italian restaurant to surprise Janis, and picks out her sexiest lingerie to go under her slightly revealing green dress. She also decides to wear heels so she can reach Janis’ face more easily.

She styles her hair down, since Janis loves to play with it, and does more makeup than she’s normally comfortable with. She decides to leave her freckles visible, though, since Janis loves those too. She swipes on some red lipstick that she rarely uses and is good to go.

Janis is wearing a green button-down top and some nice black pants, sitting on the couch and waiting for her to finish getting ready. “You ready, ba-whoa.” she says upon seeing her.

“Yeah, let’s go,” Cady says, grabbing her bag and reaching for her. Janis pulls her close before they can leave, wrapping her arms around her waist and kissing her soundly.

“You look incredible. Is there some special occasion I’m forgetting?” She purrs after pulling back, miraculously without having smudged either of their lipsticks.

“No,” Cady says, fiddling with a button on her shirt. “Just wanted to try something new.” Janis’ reaction so far seems to be a good sign.

“Hmm,” Janis hums, looking at her oddly. “Okay. As long as you’re comfortable. You look beautiful.”

“Thanks. You’re not so bad yourself,” Cady pecks her lips one more time before pulling away, taking her hand and leading her out the door. “Now come on, we’re gonna be late.”

-

Cady flirts rather aggressively throughout their whole meal; holding Janis’ hand across the table, listening even more intently than she usually does to her stories, even occasionally winking at her.

Janis seems confused by all the attention, but doesn’t complain. She follows quietly after Cady once she pays and smiles as Cady links their fingers together.

“Do you want to walk and look at the lights?” Cady asks as she turns back to look at her.

“You’re in heels and the shortest dress I’ve ever seen, baby, no. We can walk around but we should take you home to change first,” Janis replies, looking meaningfully at her outfit.

“You don’t like it?” Cady asks with a pout.

“No! I mean yes- I... baby, you look beautiful, I love you in this, I just don’t want you to freeze,” Janis explains. “And you’ll damage your feet walking too far in those.”

“Oh,” Cady says with relief. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“You want to head home?” Janis asks.

Cady presses close to her, fiddling with the collar of her shirt. “Yeah,” she purrs. “We can have more fun at home, anyway. Maybe you can help me get out of this.”

Janis lets out a flustered squeak, grabbing her hand and hauling her to a cab.

-

Once they’re both satisfied, Cady pulls Janis to shower with her. “Did you like tonight?”

“Are you kidding? Yeah,” Janis says as Cady gently traces the tattoos covering her arm. “But you’ve been acting kind of... off, are you okay? Did something happen?”

Shit. Janis is onto her. “No, no, I’m fine,” Cady says hastily. “I just wanted to show how much I love you.”

“Aww. Well it was a nice surprise, but I love you all the time, Butterfly,” Janis says as she pulls Cady close to kiss her.

“I love you too.”

Maybe I read things wrong? But what is she up to?

————-

They do actually get to go walk around and see the lights the following weekend. Cady dresses more sensibly this time, in jeans and snow boots. And a Christmas sweater under her coat, which she had talked Janis into matching. Janis had only agreed since their coats would be zipped up.

Cady looks around in childlike wonder at the beautiful lights decorating the neighborhood. She always gets so excited around the holidays. Janis doesn’t think it’ll ever stop being impossibly adorable.

She’s in the midst of trying to process that they’ll hopefully be engaged in about two weeks when Cady suddenly hauls her into an alleyway, pinning her against the wall and kissing her hungrily.

Janis responds in kind, pulling Cady into her and sucking on her lip as she slides her hands into the back pockets of Cady’s jeans. Cady moans quietly, threading her hands through Janis’ short, dark hair and pressing up on her tiptoes to be even closer.

Janis switches their places, turning to lift Cady up and pin her against the wall. Cady squeals in surprise, but locks her legs around Janis’ waist and pulls her back in, giving her lower lip a teasing nip.

Janis pulls back with a gasp for breath, but keeps Cady held against the wall. She groans happily when Cady kisses and nips her cheeks and jaw, letting Janis catch her breath before cupping her face and pressing their lips together again.

Cady is about to ask Janis to take her home so they can continue in private when her phone pings loudly in her pocket. Janis sets her down so she can check it. She blinks in surprise when she sees it’s a text from Aaron.

a-aron: hey, cady! i know it’s been a long time, but i just moved to NY and you’re one of the only people i know in the city. do you want to meet for coffee sometime and catch up?

“Who is it?” Janis asks, but doesn’t try to peek to respect Cady’s privacy.

“Um... it’s Aaron. He just moved to the city, he wants to meet for coffee soon. Would you be okay with that?” Cady asks.

“Damn, he moved here from Cali? At Christmas? Poor dude,” Janis says. “But baby, I don’t control who you meet up with. I trust you, of course you can meet with him.”

“Thanks, lovey. Let me text him back and then we can keep looking around,” Cady hums.

caddy: Sure! Janis and I are going back to Evanston next weekend, though. Are you free this week?

a-aron: does tomorrow work? i could use a break from unpacking. if it’s too short notice that’s fine, damian told me you’re working on your phd. congrats, btw

“What is it?” Janis asks when Cady grins widely.

“He’s been talking with Damian,” Cady says. “Didn’t Damian have a date the other day? And wouldn’t tell us who he was going out with?”

“Oh my god,” Janis squeals. “No way!”

“I think so. I’ll check when I meet with Aaron,” Cady giggles. “One more second, I’m sorry.”

caddy: Thank you! Tomorrow works fine, I’ll text you a good place in a while.

caddy: Oh and Janis says hi :)

a-aron: lol hello janis. see you tomorrow cady

caddy: 📷

“Alright, where were we?” Cady purrs as she pockets her phone again, pulling Janis into another smooch.

————-

The next day, Cady gets ready to meet Aaron around eleven and heads to her favorite local coffee shop.

Aaron is already at a table in the back corner, sipping a mocha as he reads a book.

“Hi, Aaron,” She says, heading over to him.

“Hey, Cady! Long time no see,” Aaron replies, standing and coming to hug her. It’s been about six months since they’ve seen each other, since he came to Regina’s college graduation party in May.

“I know, it’s good to see you!” Cady says as she sits down. “So, what brings you to New York?”

“Work, actually,” Aaron replies. “I was offered a job here and decided to go for it. I was actually kind of lonely all the way out in California. My college friends are all good people, but everyone I’m really connected to is out here now.”

“Like Damian?” Cady teases.

“How did-oh, did I tell you about that?” Aaron stutters. “It’s- we’re not, like, a thing. Or anything.”

“Do you want to be?” Cady asks gently. Aaron had come out as biromantic and asexual during his sophomore year of college. He and Damian would be cute together.

“YeahIreallydo,” Aaron says quickly before abruptly changing the subject. “Anyway, um, how have you and Janis been? Is she still doing art?”

Cady sighs, but smiles at the mention of her girlfriend. “Yeah. She actually teaches art now, to middle schoolers. And she has a commission business she runs on the side. And everything is great with us, I’m actually planning on proposing to her soon.”

Aaron gasps happily. “Congratulations, Cades! When are you doing it?”

“Christmas,” Cady grins. “Well, Christmas Eve. I have a lot to plan still, though.”

“I could help, I’m going to visit family in Evanston too. I’m assuming Damian or Regina is helping you?” Aaron asks.

“Regina, and Gretchen and Karen. Damian’s been busy with something else, but I’ve told him it’s happening,” Cady replies. “If you want to help, that would be great. Regina has been doing most of the shopping, I think.”

“I’ll shoot her a text later. Am I invited to the wedding?” Aaron asks jokingly.

“Of course,” Cady chides. “If it actually happens.”

“Cady, you and Janis are perfect for each other, she’s going to say yes. We’ve all been waiting for this since we were in high school.”

“But we were only dating for a few months in high school,” Cady says.

“But you’ve been in love with her since you met her,” Aaron replies. “I didn’t really notice it when we were together, but you never looked at me the way you look at her. I’m glad everything has worked out for you two.”

Cady is stunned. “Um. Thank you,” she stutters. “I think. So, what were you doing in California after you graduated?”

“I work in accounting now,” Aaron says. “Yes, it is as boring as it sounds. Um, I joined a rec soccer league for a while, that was cool. And I...uh, never mind.”

“No, what? Come on, you can tell me,” Cady coaxes, thanking the waiter as he delivers her tea.

“I dabbled in drag,” Aaron mumbles. Cady chokes on her tea, spitting it back into her mug.

“Oh my god! Really?!” She splutters. “Do you still do it?”

“I haven’t found anywhere to do it here yet, but technically, yes,” Aaron replies.

“What’s your drag name?” Cady demands excitedly. This is an incredible revelation.

“Lois Carmen Denominator,” Aaron says as he flushes. Cady chokes again. Of course he picked a math pun.

“Oh my god, that’s incredible,” she breathes. “Have you told Damian? He loves that stuff.”

“No, we, um. We’ve only met up the once. Somehow that didn’t come up,” Aaron says. “But I’ll let him know.”

“Yes! That’s so neat, you’ll have to let me know when you find somewhere. I’ll come to see you perform,” Cady says excitedly.

“Sure, Cades,” Aaron chuckles. “Um, has Damian, like, mentioned me at all?”

Cady grins. Now it’s her turn to play matchmaker. “Not by name,” she teases. “But he was going on and on about this super hot guy he managed to get a date with the other day.”

Aaron flushes again. “He thinks I’m hot?”

“Apparently,” Cady giggles. “Did you go out with him on Wednesday?”

“Yeah,” Aaron says, his voice a few octaves higher.

“Then yes, he thinks you’re hot,” Cady replies.

Aaron is doing his best tomato impression by this point. “Oh. Wait, what do I do now?”

“You’re so flustered, oh my god! Text him, ask to meet again,” Cady says. “He’ll say yes, he was a total mess when he came home the other day.”

“Okay,” Aaron says as he pulls out his phone. He taps out a message quickly, and his face splits in a wide grin when he gets a notification in response a few minutes later. “We’re gonna go see a movie in Evanston when we’re both there next week.”

“Aww, yay! You guys will make such a good couple,” Cady squeals.

“Uh, thanks,” Aaron says sheepishly. His phone pings again. “Oh, shit, I gotta go. I’m sorry.”

“No, I should be going too. Don’t worry about it,” Cady replies as she picks up her bag and orders a to-go iced coffee for Janis. “This was nice.”

“It was. I guess if everything goes well with Dame we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other,” Aaron says. “Later, Cady.”

“Bye!”

-

“Janis!” Cady calls as she slams the door to the apartment open.

“Jesus!” Janis yelps from her spot on the couch. “Baby, don’t do that!”

“Sorry. I got you a coffee,” Cady says sheepishly. “And Aaron and Damian are together. Or almost, anyway. They went on a date last week and they’re gonna go see a movie together when we go home next week. I was excited to tell you. Oh, and Aaron is a drag queen!”

Janis chokes. “He what? Oh, Damian’s gonna love that. He’ll have a hell of a time trying to explain this to us later. Don’t tell him you know anything, this is hilarious.”

“It is kind of funny,” Cady giggles. “Is anyone we were friends with in high school straight?”

Janis thinks for a second. “Kevin?”

“No, he’s aroace,” Cady replies. “He just has a pet lizard.”

“Good for him,” Janis says. “I guess gays do kind of flock together. Must be pheromones or some shit.”

“Homomones,” Cady says absently, making Janis burst out laughing.

“Yeah,” She giggles, wiping tears from her eyes. “Anyway, did you have a good time?”

“I did. It was nice to see him again,” Cady says. “But I missed you.”

“Aww,” Janis coos. “I missed you too. I was supposed to be working on a new commission I got but I kept getting distracted and sketching you instead. Thanks for the coffee, Butterfly.”

“Ooh, can I see?” Cady asks. She loves Janis’ art, no matter how simple a sketch it may be. “And you’re welcome, my love.”

Janis hands over her sketchbook, open to a page covered in little doodles of Cady’s face.

“These are good, lovey!” Cady says as she flicks through a few pages. “There’s a lot of them, though.”

“Yeah, I get distracted a lot,” Janis mumbles. “But thanks. Glad you don’t think it’s creepy.”

“Of course not,” Cady chides. “It’s cute.”

“You’re cuter,” Janis challenges.

Cady kisses her to shut her up, not even slightly taking the bait. “Thank you. I’m gonna go change, I’ll be right back.”

“Okay.”

-

Cady comes back quickly as she promised, but somehow different. She kisses Janis again in greeting and plops down next to her, tapping away on her phone.

“Welcome back,” Janis says jokingly. Cady either doesn’t hear or doesn’t care, not even looking up. “Butterfly?”

“Hm?” Cady hums.

“Did something happen?” Janis asks concernedly. She can’t tell if the furrow in Cady’s brow is from concentration or concern.

“Huh? Oh, no, everything is fine. I just have something to... work on,” Cady says. “I’ll be done in a while.”

“Oh. Okay,” Janis says suspiciously. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” Cady replies, but she still doesn’t look up. It doesn’t sound like there’s any meaning behind the words this time. That’s concerning.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Janis asks.

“Yes, Janis, everything’s fine,” Cady huffs, sounding a bit irritated.

“Sorry. Just wanted to make sure,” Janis mumbles.

“Thank you, love, but I’m okay. I’ll tell you if something happens,” Cady says as she finally looks up.

“Okay,” Janis replies. Cady goes back to her phone then, continuing... whatever she’s up to.

Janis pulls out her own phone, playing a game Damian had gotten her hooked on.

“Lovey, would you please go get my charger?” Cady asks after about an hour and a half.

“Sure, baby,” Janis replies as she stands up to stretch. She heads to the bedroom to grab both chargers, coming back and plugging them into the wall. Hers doesn’t reach back to her spot, so she lies her head on Cady’s lap and resumes her scrolling.

“Thank you, Jellybean,” Cady replies, plugging her own phone in and continuing her activities as she strokes her other hand through Janis’ hair.

After another hour or so, Janis gets bored. She clicks her phone off and sits up, but crawls back to Cady for cuddles.

“Janis,” Cady huffs. “What are you doing?”

“I’m bored,” Janis whines. “Snuggle me.”

“Fine, come here,” Cady pulls her closer and lets Janis cuddle into her shoulder. Janis gets comfortable and closes her eyes, falling asleep almost immediately.

-

She wakes a couple hours later, checking hastily to make sure she hasn’t been drooling all over Cady’s shoulder. She hasn’t, luckily, but she seems to have stirred a few times before, because Cady tries to shush her back to sleep.

“I’m awake, Cads,” Janis replies. “Sorry.”

“It’s okay, love. Did you have a nice nap?” Cady asks. She’s still working on her phone.

“Yeah,” Janis mumbles and cuddles back into her shoulder. “Still working?”

“I’m almost done,” Cady replies distractedly.

“Mmkay. What do you want for dinner?” Janis asks from her perch on her lap.

“Huh? Oh, can we have tacos? I bought the stuff the other day,” Cady says.

Janis nods, but makes no effort to move. “Sure, that sounds good.”

She sits for a few more minutes before she sits up, deciding to try to squeeze in a make out session before she goes to cook.

But Cady turns away. She tilts her head so Janis’ lips end up on her cheek. Janis whines in frustration.

“Caddy!”

“What, Janis?” Cady asks in exasperation.

Janis does her best puppy eyes. They aren’t quite as good as Cady’s, but they do the job well enough. “Pay attention to meeeeee.”

“Janis! This is important,” Cady says as she looks over Janis’ shoulder to continue working.

Janis’ face falls. More important than me? “Fine. I’m gonna go cook.”

“Janis, wait, I’m sorry,” Cady says, reaching for her again.

“It’s fine. You keep working,” Janis mumbles, leaving her alone as she heads into the kitchen.

-

Cady comes in sheepishly when she calls her to eat. “Love, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. I just- I have a lot going on, I took it out on you, I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, baby. Don’t worry about it, I understand. Just tell me next time so I don’t push you like that,” Janis replies. “Now come eat.”

“I will. I love you,” Cady says, kissing Janis sweetly before taking her plate.

“I love you too,” Janis hums, kissing her back.

————-

Cady seems almost embarrassed for the next week or so, still upset with herself for making Janis sad. Janis tries to cheer her up, making it very clear she understands that Cady didn’t mean it, but Cady still seems nervous around her.

Cady feels like she should do something to make up for it. She hadn’t meant to ignore Janis like that, but Regina was trying to check that everything was ordered for the proposal. Cady wanted to step things up even further and had to tell her to order extra things. Then, an issue had come up with Cady’s card, so she’d had to fix that over text all with Janis asleep on her lap.

Janis had woken up at the worst possible moment. Cady was very much not in the mood for kissing by that point, but she knows she should have told Janis she was stressed rather than just turning away and continuing her work. Of course that had upset her.

So, Cady decides to make sushi for dinner. It’s Janis’ favorite food, and Cady thinks it had helped them start dating back in high school. She picks up the ingredients on her way home from classes and starts preparing everything while she waits for Janis to come home from work.

Cady doesn’t like sushi herself, so she makes her own ‘sashimi’ with plain rice and cooked chicken instead of the raw fish she uses for Janis’. Damian had a callback to go to and wouldn’t be home until late at night. She makes him some anyway and leaves it in the fridge with a sweet note.

“What’s up, fuckers?!” Janis calls as she slams the apartment door open. Cady jumps, nearly losing a finger to the sushi knife she was holding. She hopes that one day Janis will stop doing that every time she comes home. But, for now, it’s strangely endearing.

“I’m in the kitchen, Damian’s not home,” she replies once she’s recovered from the brief shock. “I have something for you.”

“Uh oh,” Janis replies as she takes off her boots and coat and heads into the kitchen. “Aww! You made sushi again?”

“Yeah. To make up for the other day. And because I love you,” Cady answers, showing off the maki rolls she had plated into a smiley face. “Tah-dah.”

Janis squeals, coming to hug her girlfriend. She had been a little concerned that Cady might’ve beaten her to a proposal.

“Thank you, Peanut,” Janis says. “I love you.”

“You’re welcome, mpendwa. I love you too. How was work?” Cady asks as she sits across from her at their tiny dining table.

“Good, actually,” Janis replies. “One of my kids actually brought me an apple after lunch.”

“Aww, how sweet,” Cady says. “Was it the gay one?”

“Yeah,” Janis chuckles in reply. She was one of the only openly gay teachers in her district, so she provided a safe space for a lot of her students. It was healing for her, in a way, to be what she needed at that age. “He told me to say hi to you, by the way.”

“They know about me?” Cady asks as she eats a bite of her special sashimi.

“They know I have a girlfriend, for sure,” Janis hums in reply. “If I had a dollar for every time they tell me to ‘shut up about your girlfriend, Ms. S,’ I could buy this whole complex. And I have pictures of you guys around, so I think they’ve pieced together who you are.”

“Aww. That’s so cute,” Cady coos, leaning over for a kiss.

“I’m glad you think so,” Janis chuckles as she kisses her back sweetly. “What about you, how was school? Did you finish that assignment you were working on?”

“Assign- oh. Yeah, I did,” Cady says, briefly confused until she remembers Janis thought she was working on schoolwork instead of her proposal plan that day. “But it’s for that one professor, so I probably won’t find out my grade until sometime during break.”

“That’s shit,” Janis says through a mouthful of sushi. “But good job, I bet you did great.”

“Thanks,” Cady chuckles. She uses her own chopsticks to feed Janis a piece of her sushi, and Janis does the same. Before they know it the food is gone, so Janis takes their dishes to the sink before coming to pick Cady up, carrying her to the bedroom for cuddles.

-

Christmas Eve finally rolls around a few weeks later. Cady and Janis are staying with their own families for the week, and they would fly home with Damian on Boxing Day.

Janis had told Cady she wanted to take her out for Christmas Dinner, so she borrows her mom’s car and heads to pick Cady up. It’s only been about three days since she’s seen Cady, but they’ve both missed each other.

“Janis!” Cady squeals, opening the door before Janis could even knock. She’s in a tight green top and dark dress pants, unknowingly matching Janis, who is in a red top and also in dark dress pants. Cady has on heels, though, to make it easier to kiss Janis.

“Hi, baby,” Janis chuckles, picking her up for a second and spinning them around. “Your carriage awaits.”

“Why thank you, my lady, shall we be off?” Cady replies in character with a giggle.

“Indeed,” Janis says.

-

They have a lovely meal at their favorite restaurant from high school, the same place they had eaten before their senior prom.

Cady holds Janis’ arm as they exit, the ring box burning a hole in her coat pocket. “Lovey? Do you want to walk a little? We’re not too far from that clearing you took me to on our first date, we could go there.”

“I was just going to say that,” Janis replies. “Let’s drive a little closer, it’s cold, but then we can walk.”

“Okay, you’re right,” Cady giggles. “Let’s go, it’s getting dark.”

Janis runs after her, as Cady hauls her across the parking lot.

-

They chat and reminisce about how far they’ve come as they walk through the woods, neither of them quite noticing that the snow has been cleared from the path they’re walking on.

Both of them grin when the clearing comes into view, each of them thinking they’re about to propose and the other has no idea.

Cady pauses in the middle, turning quickly to look around at the gorgeous set up she thinks Regina, Gretchen, and Karen have done, not knowing that Damian and Aaron also had a hand.

Lights are strung up through all the trees and bushes nearby, and candles light their way to a little altar, with a picture of the two of them together that says “Marry Me?” in what looks suspiciously like Gretchen’s best calligraphy. Snow is fluttering down around them, leaving cold little kisses on her face.

Cady is stunned when she turns back to find Janis on one knee behind her. She had known that they were probably going to be engaged by the time they left, but not that Janis would propose first.

She gasps in shock, covering her mouth with her hands as tears start pouring from her eyes.

“Caddy,” Janis begins, reaching for one of her hands. “Cady. I can’t even begin to tell you how much I love you, how much you mean to me. You’ve changed me, changed my life, and it’s so, so much better with you in it. You make me want to stay. I don’t have the words to explain how thankful I am to have met you, and that I get to spend my life with you.”

Janis reaches into her pocket with her free hand and pulls out a ring box. Cady gasps again when she sees it. It’s a white gold band, made of two strands woven together. One strand is decorated with little diamonds, and there’s a larger one in the center of the ring. It’s absolutely beautiful.

“And I want to spend the rest of it with you, if you’ll have me. Cady Jane Heron, will you marry me?” Janis asks, holding up the ring.

Cady is almost crying too hard to speak at this point, but she manages to nod and barely choke out a “Yes, of course.”

She lets Janis slide the ring on her finger, choking back a sob, before she tackles Janis to the ground and weeps into her neck.

“Baby, please don’t cry so hard, why are you crying?” Janis asks in alarm, ignoring the fact that she’s lying in several inches of snow in favor of holding her fiancée closer.

“Because I love you,” Cady sobs. “I’m so happy.”

“I’m happy too, Peanut. Do you want to go look at what Damian did?” Janis asks.

Cady nods and rolls off of her but just holds Janis’ outstretched hand instead of using it to stand up herself.

“Baby, what are you- oh my god,” Janis says, confused until Cady also shifts to be on one knee. Cady uses her free hand to wipe the tears from under her eyes, sniffling and clearing her throat to try and get herself back under control.

“Janis, my love,” she begins after a moment. “I wish it hadn’t taken me so long to realize it, but I’ve loved you since I met you. I had no idea that the moment you saved me from that bathroom was the moment I met the love of my life. You are the most wonderful gift I’ve ever been given, and I treasure every moment I get to spend with you. I’m so excited for our forever; I love you so much. I know this is kind of a moot point now, but... Janis Olivia Sarkisian, will you marry me?”

Janis is absolutely full-on ugly crying by this point, mascara tracking down her face as she holds back sobs with her free hand. They’re technically already engaged, but she nods rapidly and sobs out a “Yes!”

Cady slides on Janis’ ring gently, a matching white-gold band, but more simple, with a single diamond in the center. Cady had also gotten the date they met, the date they started dating, and the date they got engaged engraved onto the inside of the band.

Janis hauls her up and crashes their lips together, kissing Cady so hard she thinks her lips might bruise as the cheers of their friends echo around them.

They both jump apart and scream as Regina leaps out from a bush, in a suit used by hunters and with her face even painted green. The rest of their friends also come out from behind various trees and shrubs, Damian climbing down from up above them and nearly falling to the ground until Aaron catches him.

Everyone comes to wrap them in a tight group hug, shouting their congratulations over one another. Regina stays out to take more photos before reluctantly coming and joining the cuddle.

“Reggie, what the fuck are you wearing?” Janis asks with a watery chuckle, still crying slightly.

“It’s called a ghillie suit. I didn’t want you to see me,” Regina answers as if it’s entirely normal for her to be covered in fake leaves and moss.

“We both knew you were coming, and it’s dark,” Cady replies, trying to hold back hysterical laughter. “You could have hidden behind a tree like everyone else.”

Regina apparently only realizes that now, scowling slightly. “Shit. Go big or go home, I guess.”

“Thanks, Reg,” Janis laughs. “Thank all of you.”

“Yeah, thank you guys! This really is beautiful,” Cady giggles. “God, Jay, did everyone know we were both going to do this except-“

“Us? Yeah, apparently,” Janis answers, hugging her again.

“Let us see the rings!” Karen calls, so they both extend their left hands for everyone to grab and coo over. Regina gets one more shot of Cady’s small hand resting in Janis’, showing off both of their engagement rings in a cute way.

“Okay, Damian and Aaron said they’d stay to clean this back up, Gina needs to go make herself... not green, and you two are probably going to go have wild sex somewhere, so I’m gonna take my girlfriends and go. Congratulations!” Gretchen cheers, hauling Regina and Karen away by the hand.

“Gretchen!” Regina scolds. “Congratulations, guys!”

“Yeah, congrats! Confetti emoji!” Karen calls over her shoulder.

Cady and Janis lock eyes once they’ve gone, both bursting into laughter. Gretchen was not wrong.

“Do you guys need us to stay for anything? I don’t want to leave you two here alone to clean up all of this,” Cady asks anxiously.

Damian and Aaron look at one another knowingly. “I think we’ll be fine, Cads.”

“Oh really? You’ll be fine here all alone? Have you two finally said it?” Janis teases.

Damian sticks his tongue out at her, but does reach for Aaron’s hand. “Yes. Are you satisfied now?”

Janis squeals and comes to hug him, Cady following quickly. “Good job, D, you finally got your hunk!”

“Yeah, yay!” Cady piggybacks. “But really, are you sure you don’t need help?”

“Cady, we’ll be fine. Go have your night with your fiancée,” Aaron says. Cady takes the poster from the altar, but is eventually persuaded to take Janis’ hand to lead them back to the car.

-

Cady had booked a fancy hotel room for the night, figuring she would either be having the night of her life with her fiancée or alone drowning her sorrows in ice cream and champagne.

Janis pins her to the bed instantly, tenderly removing her shirt and shoes as their lips meet again and again. Cady reaches to hold her head in place, before undoing the buttons on Janis’ shirt and flinging it across the room.

-

Janis pulls her close once they’re cleaned from their evening of passion, both of them wearing nothing but their rings (except Cady’s socks).

“We’re getting married, Janis,” Cady whispers excitedly. “You’re gonna be my wife.”

“Yeah, we are. And you’re gonna be my wife,” Janis replies, kissing her sweetly.

“I can’t believe this is what you were up to,” Cady huffs. “I knew you were being sneaky, I should’ve known.”

“You were the sneaky one! I thought you had some crazy homework assignment, I was wondering why you wouldn’t let me help you with anything,” Janis retaliates. Cady starts giggling then, seemingly at nothing. “What?”

“I just-I can’t believe we had the exact same idea,” Cady says between fits of laughter. “I was still surprised when you did yours because I thought everything was set up for mine.”

“Oh,” Janis says, laughing too. “I guess we’re just that in sync. We were meant to be.”

“Meant to be indeed,” Cady replies, pulling her down on top of her for another kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too, Butterfly. When should we get married?” Janis asks.

“I’ve always wanted a spring wedding,” Cady hums. “Like, April or early in May, maybe. What about you?”

“I dunno, I never really... thought this would happen to me,” Janis hums. “I never had a dream wedding. A spring one sounds nice, we could do it outside. But do you really think we can plan a whole wedding that fast?”

“Aww, my love. I’m so glad I get to marry you,” Cady says sadly. “I think we could, if we really work on it. I don’t want anything crazy, and I don’t think you do either?” Janis shakes her head. “Yeah, so if we do something small, I think we can do it that fast. And if not, we’ll do it the next year.”

“God, no, I don’t want to wait anymore,” Janis breathes. “Even April sounds too far away.”

Cady smiles widely. “You’re too cute. I love you so much.”

“I love you more,” Janis teases. “We can plan more later. Come cuddle me.”

“I love you most. Fiancée,” Cady says in retaliation as she snuggles into Janis to go to sleep.

“Fiancée.” Janis replies, pecking her lips.

“Lovey.” Cady says, pecking her back.

“Baby.”

“Jellybean.”

“Butterfly.”

“Sweetheart.”

“Peanut.”

“Darling.”

“Kitkat.”

“Mpendwa.”

“Wait, I’ve always wondered what that means,” Janis replies. “And the other one, um-“

“Mpenzi? That means, like, love or partner, or favorite. Mpendwa means dear or dearest.”

“Oh. That’s cute,” Janis squeaks. “Mon coeur.”

“Aww, I’m your heart?” Cady coos. “How sweet, Bluejay.”

“You might as well be, I can’t live without you,” Janis says. “I love you.”

Cady cuddles impossibly closer, tipping her face up to kiss her again. “I love you so much. So, so much.”

“Goodnight, fiancée,” Janis says as she kisses her goodnight.

“Goodnight, fiancée,” Cady yawns back, nuzzling into her chest and falling into a blissful sleep, Janis following quickly.

I can’t wait to marry you.

-

hope you enjoyed!

requests are still open, please leave them either here, on my wattpad, or on my ao3. all are the same handle, maybeimamuppet. it may take a few weeks for your request to be published, but I am cranking them out as fast as I can and I will get to everyone's eventually.

thanks for reading!

lots of love,

ezzy

[thegoodomensdumpster]

Can't stop thinking about your Crawleigh drawing, its so compelling. I feel sad for him getting rained on all alone...has he been on earth alone all this time? Will you draw him again? Is there a way to learn more about his story?

OOOOOH you have no idea how delighted I am that I received this ask ! You just enabled me to drop all my Crawleigh feelings out in the open. Thank you so much for that. First of all, for those who might have missed it: here the fanart @yeoldehetalian​ is referring to (yes I’m showing it again because I love Crawleigh he’s so baby)

If you are not aware: Crawleigh was the proto version of both Crowley and Aziraphale in Gaiman’s first draft of what was going to become Good Omens, a little piece of writing called William The Antichrist. After he sent it to Pratchett, the latest made the excellent suggestion to split Crawleigh into the two characters we’ve come to know and love. From memory, here is what we learn about Crawleigh in William The Antichrist: -is baby -not very good at being a demon -waited for the plumber a whole day -didn’t do any evil deeds because he was waiting for the plumber to arrive -the plumber never came and Crawleigh was really put out so he said nothing -saves all the neighbourhood cats from trees they get stuck in -can’t be mean to humans because well they are nice to him so ??? -has been tortured in Hell after the whole Atlantis debacle (which implies that he was the reason Atlantis sunk I guess) -drives a Citroën 2CV -doesn’t seem to really have any magical ability ?  Uh maybe there’s something else but I don’t remember. But you get the idea. He’s baby. In the picture below (yay ! new Crawleigh fanart !) you can see Crawleigh and his entourage of cats. I was conflicted on whether the rescued cats would take a liking to him or if they would be scared of his demonic aura, but I couldn’t bring myself to draw the Bad Cat Ending so, there, new headcanon: all the animals Crawleigh rescues take an immediate liking to him and their presence become an every day life nuisance. Kindness contains the seed of its own destruction lmao)

The boy is gonna trip on the stripped cat, I can tell you that much. ANYWAYYYY.... Here comes the fun part where I dump all my Crawleigh thoughts. More below the cut!

So, considering how GO works with binomes and mirrors, I decided to back engineer WTA by removing the duos. Crawleigh is a mix of Crowley and Aziraphale; there are two other characters that are respectively a mix of Anathema and Newt and a mix of Tracy and Shadwell (not entirely sure what that would entail tbh; so far I’m imagining two female characters, and Anewthema is the most fleshed out. She’d be something like the descendant of both a witch and a witchfinder and would be very conflicted about her heritage, having troubles making sense of magic being a thing when she has raised rationnality to a degree that it has become a dogma. Or something like that. Anyway I think that’s a cool base.) Now about William himself, the Them and the mirrors. I thought, by removing the duos and therefore the mirrors, Crawleigh would end up trying to stop Armageddon all by himself. This means that one of the core themes of GO, the fact that people have to work together and every contribution, as little as it is, is never unsignificant, isn’t really applicable anymore. Because the theme has to be shared by all the protagonists. In GO, Adam can refuse to destroy the world because not only does he like the world, but also because he’s got a whole network of support. So I think, if Crawleigh ends up having to try stopping Armageddon on his own, that should be the link at the very least between him and William (I would have said between him and all the other main characters but let’s be honest: a story where none of the main characters interact together is not very appealing). And thus we get a story that isn’t about relying on support of other people but on doing the right thing and gaining self confidence and loving yourself even when all the odds are stacked against you and you don’t have anyone to really rely on. I would imagine Crawleigh beginning the story as an obedient (tho ultimately useless) demon with little backbone and regrets and no self confidence, and through the pressure of Armageddon, discovering a very strong and very good part of himself that would end up with him saying fuck to Hell and repairing his plumbery all by himself.  As for William, well, he would go along the same way. I don’t think he’d have the Them with him. At least not yet. Maybe he’s a little weird, has trouble making friends. Maybe the other kids at school make fun of him. Maybe there is this group of kids that seem cool but he’s too shy to approach them.  And I imagine after a pep talk from someone ( Anewthema probably ? After all Anathema is the one talking to Adam in GO so it’d be fitting ) William would realize that because his life sucks a little it’s not by destroying the world - a world that he actually loves ! he’s built up a fort in Hogback woods all by himself! he loves nature and animals! - tht it’s gonna get better. He won’t be able to make any friends if there is no one around to make friends with. (This adds the non neglectable bonus of making the Horsemen “friendship” offer all the more tempting to a young boy who has never really had any friends and is aching for it).  So ultimately, Crawleigh and William would be like “yes, I am weird. Yes, I am alone. Yes, it makes me suffer. No, I’m not gonna be a bastard because of it. Maybe it’ll get better, maybe it won’t, but I’m gonna do my darn best to take care of myself even if nobody else will”. So, it’s less cotton candy than GO, but I think it’s a great message to pass along. Self love, self discovery, self confidence, staying true to yourself even in dark times. Also the fact that being alone / single is not necessarily a bad thing, can be a choice and something you can live with very well. Crawleigh and / or another one of the main characters would end up like “I am actually fine like this”. And... that’s pretty much it. There, you’ve got all my thoughts and reasonning about, basically, how I would have decided to write the whole William The Antichrist novel lmao. I’m not gonna write it though. But if anyone feels inspired and want to give it a go based on my ideas, by all means. Feel free to borrow or to contact me if you want to brainstorm more ideas / make a collaboration.  Why not. I’ve got too many Crawleigh feels.

[elliethesuperfruitlover]

It’s Okay

A/N: I’m writing a self-indulgent fic due to fact that I’m feeling  ✨ insecure and ugly ✨Yes this is me projecting. I like Heaven’s Design Team, and Unabara is one of my comfort characters, and he’s also v tall, and he looks like a good hugger. So why not write him being the fluffy being that he is.

Warnings: once again another breakdown, body image talk, mild nsfw mentions, mention of panic attacks

Tag List (even tho i know none of y’all dont know the show but shh): @misskittysmagicportal,  @bisexualnathanyoung, @super-unpredictable98, @joz-stankovich, @hufflepuffheroine, @ghouls-buddy, @magic-multicolored-miracle, @seancekitsch, @the-freckled-luba, @neuroticpuppy

“What’s wrong?” Neptune asks, seeing you curled up on the corner of the bed, hands covering your face. He’d just come in from another day of work with the team. They were working on an animal that’s seen and heard from far away. It’d been going okay, and they were making a lot of progress.

  You’d been denying him an answer to how you were feeling all day. Yes, he deserves to know. But something told you that you were being a burden. And that he didn’t need to hear your issues. He has a lot on his plate. And you didn’t want to stress the poor thing out. It’d only add fuel to your emotional fire. So you bottled it up. Seemed to be working just fine. Nothing a little forgetting can fix. You were really struggling. You can’t tell anyone how you feel, or else they may think it’s their job to help you. And it’s not. It never is. But they do it somehow. You’d always felt like a burden, maybe it was due to how everything in the past had worked out for you (horribly). Or maybe it was just due to your extreme anxiety issues, as well as being atrocious at keeping friends. They always left. And never came back. And somehow, that mean-spirited little voice always said it’s your fault. You’re the catalyst. You’re why everything falls apart around you. You’re the reason everyone’s stressed and upset. So that’s your philosophy. How’s that been working out, huh?

“I’m tired. And I’m upset for no reason. I’m also not feeling the most confident. But I can’t really remember a time where I did feel good about my appearance. I just straight up think I’m ugly. ” you mutter, tears forming in your eyes. 

  You’d been waiting for your body to finally cave in and let you cry. Weeks of missed panic attacks. Days without breaking down. First it seemed fine. Then the fatigue set in. So did the muscle aches. And feeling like sitting in the corner for the entire day. Thinking of what you could be doing. And shaming yourself for not being able to make a full meal. It was just so much all of the time. Everyone has their limits, but those also change. People grow. Somehow, though, it seemed that you were left out. And that everyone seemed to be doing just fine. Except for you, of course.

“Well, it’s fine to be upset, or tired. And I’ve mentioned that if you need help sleeping, I’m glad to help you. Be it cuddling or simply letting you be. But the latter part is where I find the issue. Your appearance is fine. But I know people can see each other differently.” he whispers, sitting down near you, but it seems as if he wasn’t close enough.

“Well, I honestly don’t know how you manage to call me cute sometimes. I really don’t see it. Never have.” you state, falling back completely onto the bed, arms spread out.

“I only say it because it’s the truth. If I think you look cute, or nice, I’ll tell you. There’s no use in me lying. What is this stemming from?” he asks, putting his hand on yours.

“I saw some of my old classmates from school and just....how? How do I equal to them? I feel like everyone’s moving on, and looking good. And feeling confident. But I just can’t seem to.” you say. Your eyes floating to a specific spot on the ceiling that looked like a snowman, and you thought about it for a while.

“Everyone’s different. And I think you look perfectly fine. And some people may just be feeling better. It doesn’t make you any worse.” he replies softly, twisting to face your flat form on the bed.

“Yeah, but I fucking hate everything about myself. Every time I seem to have something good, that dumbass voice comes back and I’m right back here again. I love my hair, then it’s a burden and I want to get rid of it. I look nice in these jeans, then I think I should lose the weight so they aren’t as tight. What the fuck is wrong with me?” you ask, tears finally falling onto the comforter.

“Aw, come here.” he says, laying down so he can look you at you closer. “There’s nothing wrong with you. Sure, you have anxiety, and yes, you have intrusive thoughts, but that’s okay. It doesn’t make you any less of a person. And it doesn’t make you any less attractive.” Unabara whispers, holding you close.

  You begin sobbing into his chest, and your hands grasp at his sweater, trying to find something to hold onto before you fall from whatever was keeping you above the water. Dark, deep waters. Every part of you wants to scream, but you can’t seem to get that giant bubble from your chest. Neptune’s hand gently moves up and down your back, and you gasp for air as wave after wave of feeling go through you. It’s like you never get a break as tears fall repeatedly down your face, drowning you in a weird way. Your chest heaves as you wrap around Neptune, face hidden in his neck to get away from the reality of him seeing you like this. Vulnerable, and some would consider it torn to the ground. Somehow by your own feelings, you’d been torn to the ground and for what? Feelings were supposed to tell you what’s going on, not ponder if every person you’d met in your entire life was offended by you, and if they were it was always your fault. Never anyone else’s, always yours. That’s not true, but somehow you’d managed to get it engrained in your skull do much that no lobotomy would help.

  They never seemed to leave you be, it seemed. One moment everything’s fine and it’s all good and the next you’re on the floor again, wondering whether or not you should’ve said this, or that. Or said these things, or even simply existed in their presence. You had done nothing wrong, yet only the most harsh and cruel punishments were reserved for you with your name in bold, bright letters. Nothing could help you at this point. Not the warmest, and most inviting of baths, or the coldest bowl of ice water to dip your head in, disrupting you from the shaking you’d been experiencing. Even his strong arms couldn’t help as you trembled in his grip. You hadn’t even noticed that his eyes were closed, almost as if he was trying to forego tears. See look what you’re doing to him. You thought, but it was shut down as he opened his eyes, and looked directly at you. Throwing you off for a moment before you went back to dreading everything about yourself once more. Except the hiccups were subsiding, and the feeling in your fingers and toes had begun to come back. Unabara’s head was tilted onto yours, and you matched your breathing to his, calming down somewhat.

“Can you do something really quickly for me...please?” he whispered, deep voice echoing in your mind. You gently nodded, and he moved to get up as you still sat on the bed, the ends of your jacket crumpled and partially wet.

“You don’t have to do this, but I’m going to go from your feet to your head. List what you don’t like about the body part.” he said, and you nodded once more as he gently nudged your foot, looking at you to engage.

 You thought for a moment and replied in a quiet voice, rough from the tears.

“I don’t like how big my feet are. Sure, it may be fine with dancing, and it’s not that noticeable. But shoes my size are upwards of 70 dollars.” you reply, fiddling with your hands.

“Mm, I think they’re fine. I like the fact that we can share shoes sometimes. It’s more space for other things. Legs?”

“They’re oddly shaped. And they’re discolored too.” you stutter out, feeling goosebumps tickle your skin as his hands gently moved up your form.

“I think they’re quite lovely. And you’ve got quite a kick. Strong too. You can fit in more odd positions, may look uncomfortable. But you always manage somehow.” he says, kissing the top of your knee.

  It went on like that for a while, with you talking about how you hated the fact that your thighs don’t match in color to how the divots in your hip made you feel like you should look different elsewhere. When one part of the body was talked over, you both removed a piece of clothing, the same for each person. Somehow you’d even managed to mention that you didn’t like the fact that your stretch marks could be seen with a simple flick of a waistband. And only he got to see the secret ones. Hidden from many views. Eventually, it got to the point where you were mostly nude in front of Neptune. His eyes averted from where some would be looking most. When his eyes did, however, drifted southwards, it wasn’t one of sexual thought.

“What about here?” he gently asked, hands landing on your hips.

“I don’t think I can complain about her. So much to learn. And so many feelings, good and bad. But none to blame.” you mutter, gasping as a skilled finger made its way to where you seemed to want it most.

“I think it’s wonderful. And not in the “I think vaginas are nice because I only think of it in a sexual manner way. I think they’re neat. And there’s a lot to learn, and much more to unlearn as well. I always like how you feel on the precipice of orgasm. Almost like a vice, but not one that I’d be upset about. You’re usually the most vocal, pillow over your face, or face pressed into my shoulder. Then, you’re there. And I’m there, or close enough. You just look so peaceful and emotional in the most wonderful of ways. You’re not worried about how you look. Or how your hair looks spread across the sheets unevenly. You just feel everything at once. And I find that so amazing.” he whispers into your ear, and it took everything in you not to take him right then and there.

  Unabara didn’t give you a quickie that night. Or the ol’ suck and fuck. He took his time, even after you cried on his shoulder. And admitted your flaws to him. He made sure you were fine every step of the way. Holding your hand. Breathing into your neck as to not overstimulate his own ears. He even took the time to kiss over every last mark and scar from childhood on your legs before eating you out. I mean, yeah, you were ready to shove his entire face in your vagina. But the sheer amount of effort he went through to make sure that you were comfortable, and happy (in that moment at least). It honestly could push you to tears. How could someone care so much about another? They’d go through hours of love and appreciation, just to see you smile, or almost wake up the neighbors. 

  Tears fell down your face once more that night as you cuddled into Neptune’s chest. You listened to his heartbeat as his hands lay once more on your back. He looked at you with so much love and support. And you couldn’t help but crack under that pressure. Pressure to reciprocate. You always did. Somehow. Even in those moments where you pondered researching panic methods just to feel some relief. But you made it. And he found you worthy. Then slowly, slowly, you found yourself worthy as well.

Masterlist