#it really makes my heart swell to feel the love from yall!

[ylove-bandaesthetics]

Hi Yessy love! How are you? I hope you’re doing better! We miss u but make sure you’re taking care of yourself like you deserve! Have you watched GotG 3? I would love to hear your thoughts!!

Best trilogy in the MCU hands down omfg!

Here’s a pic for you of beautiful Gamora, played by a latina queen. A latina queen for another latina queen!! Haha <3 We love u!

[y3sterdaysproblem]

let me love you - matthew sturniolo

summary: your boyfriend sucks, and matt may or may not be in love with you.

warnings: pure smut, cheating, oral f!receiving, fingering, hickeys, unprotected sex.

a/n: thanks for enjoying my ghostface au! this is kind of a slow burn it’s like 1.5k words before they get freaky. yall wanted best friend matt so here you go 😇 ALSO I started writing this prior to everyone talking about no nut november sooooo …. lmk if u want smut from me still or maybe some fluff or angst cuz I am a sluuuttt for angst

wc: 6.2k

-

“No!” You cry out, throwing your body backwards on the white couch you sat on, dramatically slamming the PS5 controller down next to you in defeat. “You guys teamed up on me and cheated! No fair.”

Laughter filled your ears around you, your friends and boyfriend finding your reaction hilarious.

You were at your best friend Matt’s house, along with his two brothers, your boyfriend, and a couple of other friends from high school. Nick had wanted to invite your guys’ old friend group over as it had been a while since you had all seen each other together, and so far you guys were having a blast. You’d ordered a pizza, watched a cringey movie that came out while you guys were in high school, and now were playing Mario Kart, which was never really your strong suit.

“Nobody ganged up on you, kid. You just suck,” Chris laughed from his spot next to you, bringing his phone up to take a picture of the big pout on your face.

“I hate this game,” you tell him, standing up from your spot between him and your boyfriend, getting up to go refill your red solo cup with soda. As you walk to the kitchen, you hear footsteps behind you, and you’ve been friends with everyone here long enough to know who’s creeping up behind you, so you turn around, pout still plastered on your face.

Matt laughs as soon as he makes eye contact with you, unable to hold it in. “Cmon, don’t be a sore loser,” he starts.

Your jaw drops at his comment in disbelief before you pick it up and giggle, dropping the facade. “I’m not being a sore loser,” you assure him with another laugh. “I’m thirsty and was also kind of wondering if there was any pizza left.”

Matt smiles at your change of attitude, happy you��re not actually upset with the outcome of the game, even though he would never mind trying to cheer you up. “I knew you’d want more, actually,” he moves around the table to open the fridge door. “Seemed like everyone was going crazy on the pizza so I grabbed a couple slices and put them aside for you.”

Your heart swells a bit as you walk around to join Matt by the fridge, smiling wide as he pulled out a tupperware container with a couple pieces of your favorite pizza. “Aww,” you drawl. “You know me so well, Matt. Thank you!” You take the container from him and set it on the counter before turning around and wrapping your arms around his neck, hugging him tightly.

He hugs you back with his arms around his waist for a moment before pulling away, patting your sides as he does so. “Of course, just heat it up real quick. I’m gonna run to the bathroom,” he smiles at you, turning and walking away.

You smile to yourself as you pop the tupperware into the microwave, listening to the hum of the machine while you twiddle your fingers and wait for it to heat up. As it beeps, you feel a presence sneak up behind you, hands wrapping around your waist.

You spin around with a small grin, looking up at your boyfriend looming over you. “Hi,” you say sweetly.

“Hey,” he responds, kissing your forehead. “More pizza?” His eyebrows furrow as he looks down at you.

“Yeah,” you respond, breaking free from his grasp to grab your pizza out of the microwave. “Matt put a few slices aside for me because I always eat more later.” You take a bite out of one of the slices, humming in satisfaction, looking up at your boyfriend with a small smile.

He looks down at you with a smile that doesn’t meet his eyes, watching you eat. “Didn’t you have like four pieces earlier?” He questions, raising his eyebrows slightly.

You pause chewing for a moment, furrowing your eyebrows as you look at him. “Huh?” You say, slightly garbled by the food in your mouth. You take a moment and chew what’s in your mouth, swallowing thickly before setting down your bowl, placing both hands on your hips. “Are you questioning how much I’m eating or am I hearing things?”

He crosses his arms as the smile drops off of his face. “That’s not what I mean,” he starts. “I’m just… saying you had a few pieces earlier and you just heated up like four more pieces, that’s all.”

You guys have been friends for almost ten years now, however your relationship was relatively fresh, only about seven months in, and in those ten years that you’ve known each other, you’ve never been known to eat salads or small portions. You’ve always had a faster metabolism, and a more active life, so you weren’t particularly worried about indulging in a few extra pieces of pizza during a night with some of your closest friends.

You tilt your head and narrow your eyes, arms coming up to cross over your chest. “Is this something you’d be comfortable saying in front of all of our friends?”

He scoffs and shakes his head, turning to walk away. “Don’t make this something it’s not, babe. Just a question,” he says, heading back towards the couch where the rest of your friends are.

You’re still standing there with your arms crossed, watching him sit down next to Chris, picking up a controller while he laughs about something somebody said, completely switching up his attitude like he wasn’t just trying to patrol what you were eating and how much of it.

At that moment, Matt comes back, drying his hands on his grey sweatpants, making them a bit darker on the outsides of his thighs. “How’s the pizza?” He asks with a smile, before he notices your demeanor and the pizza resting on the counter instead of in your hands. “Everything okay?”

You turn your attention to your friend, looking at him with a confused expression while you try to decipher the interaction that just happened between you and your boyfriend. “Yeah,” you say, but it isn’t a confident answer, and you sound almost confused. “Come on, let’s go sit back down,” you tell him, grabbing your bowl of reheated pizza before starting to walk back to the couch, flopping down on it aggressively, making sure everyone knew you were back.

Matt follows happily, sitting down next to you. You turn and smile at him before slinging one of your legs over his, his hand habitually landing on your knee as you did so. You two had always been the closest in the friend group, but it was always platonic, as much as some of the people in the friend group wanted you guys to end up together.

Nick came and sat on your other side, smiling at the bowl in your hand, pointing at it happily. “Secret stash?” He asked.

You nod enthusiastically, swallowing the food that was in your mouth. “Matt saved me some because he knows how much I love to eat again a few hours later.” Your tone was slightly bratty, eyes flicking over to your boyfriend who stared at you and Matt. He was clearly mad at how close the two of you were sitting, and the hand placed gently on your knee.

Nick nodded. “Oh yeah, I think we all know how much you love leftovers. I wish I could eat as much as you and still look that good,” he teased. You laughed, knowing Nick had no idea the interaction that transpired in the kitchen a few minutes ago, and his timing was just coincidentally perfect.

The night played on as usual, games continuing to play on the tv, loud chatter filling the room as you all caught up on each others’ lives, talking about how adult life takes so much time to live and leaves so little for socializing.

Soon, people started leaving, and eventually it was just the triplets, your boyfriend and yourself, all sitting on the couch as the conversation started to die out, everyone starting to become tired.

Your boyfriend stands from the couch, stretching his arms above his head, shirt riding up slightly. “I think I’m gonna head out, I’m really tired,” he says. “You want a ride home, babe?” He looks down at you where you now laid on your side, head resting on a pillow by the arm of the couch.

You look up and shoot him a quick smile, shaking your head. “I’m gonna pass out here for the night, thanks though.” You tell him. It was typical for you to stay over at the triplets’ house when you got the chance. You’ve known them the longest and grown the closest with them out of the friend group.

“Oh, you can sleep in my room!” Chris smiles at you, reaching over to grab your ankle, shaking it lightly. “I’m gonna sleep in Nick’s room.”

You sit up and laugh at Chris, nodding your head lightly. “Okay, thanks, Chris. You’re the best.”

You and Chris had an almost sibling like relationship from the start, teasing and goofing off being an essential part of your bond. They were also a little bit younger, so he was like the little brother you never had.

Your boyfriend nods and walks over to you, leaning down to kiss you quickly before straightening back out, heading towards the door. “Bye guys, thanks for hosting,” he says towards the boys before leaving, door shutting behind him.

You let out a sigh you didn’t know you were holding, looking around at the three boys around you, all comfortably sitting on the couch on their phones. You smile to yourself a bit before pushing yourself up off of the couch, causing them to look up at you.

“I’m gonna go to sleep,” you say. “Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed, Chris.”

Chris smiles up at you and nods. “Goodnight,” he says.

“Night,” you respond, starting your walk through the kitchen to get to the stairs.

Matt gets up and trails behind you, and you don’t even question it, only turning around to look at him when you’ve made it to Chris’ room. “Here to tuck me in?” You tease.

Matt laughs and shrugs, walking to sit on the edge of the bed, looking up at you as you raid the drawers to find a large t-shirt to change into for the night. “I mean I can tuck you in if you want, but I just wanted to make sure you were okay after earlier. I’m not really sure what happened but you weren’t right after that.”

You pull out an old, worn out red sox shirt and walk over to the bed, sitting down in the middle of it. You let out a sigh and stare down at your hands. “I’m okay, it’s just… you know how I was eating those last few pieces of pizza?”

Matt scoots closer to you and turns to face you, nodding his head as he did so. “Did he say something to you?” He asked curiously, head tilting a bit.

You take a deep breath and nod, letting the air out slowly and quietly while you think of what to say. “He just made a comment about how much I was eating and it kind of rubbed me the wrong way. Said I already ate a good amount earlier so I shouldn’t eat any more.”

Matt pulled his head back with a disgusted look on his face. “That’s weird. It’s no different from how you usually eat.” He said.

You just shrugged your shoulders and leaned back against the headboard. “Yeah, I know. That’s why I was so confused when he said it, it was just so out of left field. It’s not like I’ve gained weight since we’ve been together or anything either. I don’t know, Matt, he’s been weird lately. I’m not even sure if we should be together, but if we break up it’s going to make things weird between everybody and… I just don’t know.” You run your hands over your face and groan loudly, smacking your hands back down on your legs when you’re done.

Matt looks at you for a moment, trying to figure out what to say that might make things better, but his curiosity gets the better of him and he finds himself trying to dig deeper. “How is he being weird?” He inquires, sitting still in his spot in the middle of the bed.

You shake your head and look up at Matt, pursing your lips as you think. “He just… he’s not very physical with me, he barely takes me on dates and when he does, I have to ask him to take me out, his texts are so dry it hurts, and… not to be too tmi but… I’m just not very,” you blush and look down at your lap before finishing your sentence. “Satisfied.” Your voice fades off into almost a whisper.

Matt’s eyebrows raise, shocked that you confided in him about your sex life. It wasn’t the first time it had happened, but normally he didn’t know the guys you were complaining about and you could joke about it more freely. “Like… you’re not finishing?” He asks, not sure how far you’d be willing to take this conversation.

You cover your face, embarrassed, but ultimately you make eye contact through your fingers and shake your head, silently answering the question. “I do things for him every time, but I feel like he’s just using me to get off and my pleasure isn’t important. He’s never even eaten me out, just like fingered me before sex but you can tell he’s just doing it because he thinks he should, not because he actually wants to, and I’ve been with guys who enjoy that kind of stuff so I know it’s not a universal thought that getting your girlfriend off is a chore. But he doesn’t even get me off! He just like… plays around down there and then fucks me for like two minutes!”

Matt laughs at your tone, nodding his head in agreement. “Two minutes is… crazy,” he cackles.

You laugh back at him, the mood lifted. “You’re telling me. I feel like I can literally count the seconds without losing track in the time it takes him to finish.”

Matt’s head falls back in laughter, but when he comes back to look at you, he raises an eyebrow at you. “He’s seriously never eaten you out?” He asks, shocked at the earlier statement.

“No,” you shake your head, lips falling in a tight line. “Crazy, right?”

He nods, taking a breath in like he was going to speak, but stopping himself before words could come out. He thought for a moment, not wanting to say anything to make the situation awkward. “I feel like I always eat a girl out and get her off at least once before we actually, y’know. Fuck.”

It’s been way too long, you think to yourself. Way too long since you’ve actually been pleasured by a man that left you satisfied and even craving more. With your boyfriend now it just felt like you should be having sex, but you never craved it.

“I wish that was the case but… it’s mostly just me blowing him and not getting anything in return, or we just have sex without any sort of foreplay,” you tell him. Your eyes bore into his and you swallow thickly. It’s not like you’ve never thought about what sex with Matt would be like. You guys have talked about your sexual encounters before, but mostly as a joke, in ways that didn’t make you guys want each other, at least that’s what you thought. But now, talking about how awful your sex life was and how attentive Matt was in bed, it made you feel even more deprived.

Unbeknownst to you, Matt had thought about sex with you more than he’d like to admit, but would never bring it up due to fear of rejection. He’s had a crush on you for a while now, but the thoughts of getting you naked and in his bed and consumed him recently. He was so turned on by even the smallest thing; the clothes you wore, your hair in a bun paired with your glasses, the smell of your perfume, everything made him want you even more. He felt like this conversation might be the only time he could make a move and actually have it make sense, but he didn’t know how to bring it up.

“You deserve better than that,” he starts nervously, right hand playing with the ring on his left pinky. “Have you talked to him about it?”

You laugh, rolling your eyes. “Yeah right. Doesn’t do anything. He says he doesn’t do that. Says it’s boring and he hates the taste. Like suck it up.”

Matt keeps eye contact with you, taking a deep breath before the words that will change your relationship no matter the outcome slip past his lips.

“I love it,” he says. “I love eating girls out, having them squirm underneath me, pull my hair… it might be my favorite part of sex.”

Your throat goes dry as Matt talks, the eye contact getting almost too intense for you. The air in the room has shifted, and it’s hard to ignore. You swallow thickly, looking down to his lips before flitting back up to his eyes.

“Listen, I.. I don’t want to make this awkward or make you uncomfortable and,” he scoots closer on the bed, reaching a hand up to trail over your thigh. “I know we’ve been friends for a really long time and this would change things forever, but I can’t even tell you how bad I want to make you feel good.”

You suck in a breath, goosebumps arising on your leg where his hand rested, thumb gently swiping back and forth. “Matt…” you look at him with raised eyebrows.

“I know, I know you’re with him,” he interrupts. “But I could make you feel so good. Please.”

Begging was your weakness, the desperate look in his eyes having you more hot and bothered than it should’ve. You were in a relationship for fuck’s sake, this was wrong on more levels than one.

Matt’s hand reaches out to push a strand of hair behind your ear before he rests his palm on your cheek, getting up on his knees to tower over you, looking down at you from his elevated position. He leans down, left hand resting behind you on the headboard, locking you both into place. His face is right in front of yours now, both of your lips merely inches away.

“Please,” he breaths out quietly.

You stare up into his eyes for a second.

Two…

Three…

“Fuck it,” you whisper, reaching up to grab the back of his head and pull him down the last few inches, slamming your lips together.

His tongue slides past your lips almost immediately, meeting yours fervently, his hand that rested on your cheek sliding down to rest on your waist, gripping gently like he was afraid you’d slip from his fingers.

Your hand slides up to thread through his hair, keeping pressure on the back of his head to keep him close. You moaned against his lips, both of you kissing more aggressively than you typically would due to the tension that’s been growing between the two of you for years, finally snapping.

“I need you so bad,” he mutters against your lips, sliding down to kiss your neck, tongue sliding against your skin as he left kisses down your collarbone. “Take your clothes off, please, I need to see you.”

You sit up from the headboard and oblige, pulling your shirt over your head, leaving you in just your sweat shorts and bra. He follows suit and takes his shirt off, throwing it to the ground before sliding down the bed so he can grab your ankles, yanking you down the bed roughly so you were laid flat on the mattress instead of sitting up.

You let a small squeal leave your lips, followed by a giggle. This is exactly what you needed, to be manhandled by a man that wanted nothing more but to please you, and you couldn’t be more excited for the night ahead of you.

Matt crawls back up the bed, looking at you like you’re his prey and he’s about to devour you. “You look so good,” he says quietly, voice deeper than usual. He’s hovering above you again just staring down at your face and admiring, like he can’t believe he’s finally getting what he’s waited so long for.

Your hands reach up to touch his shoulders, dragging your fingers up and down his arms that are braced on either side of you, holding his body up. You admire him for a few minutes yourself, just staring up at him as he looks at you, the silence not awkward at all, instead it’s comforting, and he feels like home.

Finally, he breaks the eye contact as he leans down to kiss you again and your arms come up to wrap around his neck. “Matt,” you mumble, his lips pressed firmly against yours. He hums in response, placing a final small kiss on your lips as he pulls away to hear what you have to say.

You’re nervous as you speak, but push the feelings aside as to come off more confident than you actually are.

“I need you,” you whisper, staring straight up into his bright blue eyes. “Please.”

Matt’s still for a moment before he leans his weight on his left hand, sliding his right one underneath your back that arches for him to have easier access, skillfully undoing the clasp on your bra. As soon as it’s undone, you use your own hands to peel the bra off of your arms, leaving you completely topless in front of him, nipples hardening at the cold rush of air on your chest.

He starts his descent down the bed, letting his lips trail down your body, over your collarbone, through the valley of your breasts, down your stomach, finally reaching your hipbones where he started to suck a mark into as he tucked his fingers in the waistband of your shorts, pulling them down along with your underwear, your naked body fully on display for Matt for the first time ever, but in the back of your mind, you hope it isn’t the last.

He pulls his lips away from the purple mark he sucked into your skin, admiring his work. “You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to mark you up, to claim you.” Matt looks up at your face to see you already staring down at him. “Need to taste you so bad.”

You nod your head lightly, giving him permission to finally do what he wanted, and what you needed so badly.

His head dips down to kiss your hip again, lips moving over your thighs, his hands pushing them farther apart to give him access to what he needed the most. His eyes stare down at your core, something that would usually make you insecure, but right now only made you feel even hornier, the thought of him soaking in the way that you looked down there turning you on more than anything so far. “Pretty?” You ask him bashfully.

Matt licks his lips in response, taking in a breath to calm himself. “Fucking perfect.” He drops his head and drags his tongue from your hole up to your clit, grabbing the wetness that dripped out of you and spreading it up, wrapping his lips around the nub that needed attention more than it ever has in your life.

You gasp and drop your head down to the pillow, hands instantly tangling in the sheets to ground yourself somehow. “Fuck, Matt,” you cry, arching your back off of the bed.

He uses his hands to keep your legs spread apart as he devours your pussy, the wet sounds coming from his mouth meeting your heat filling the room. You’re grinding up into his mouth and he lets you, wanting to allow you to do whatever felt the best to you, but you halt your motions when he pulls away and lets go of your left thigh, dragging his fingers up your leg until they meet your entrance, slipping two fingers into you, your pussy enthusiastically accepting them.

He brings his mouth to the inside of your thigh as he starts to finger you slowly, thumb rubbing against your clit as he does so, sucking another hickey into your soft skin. You’re a moaning mess as he plays with you, finally feeling something other than disappointment in bed for the first time in a long time.

After he’s satisfied with the mark he’s left on your skin, he moves his thumb away from your clit and trails back up to wrap his lips around it, sucking softly and letting his tongue run over the nub, fingers still working inside of you. The combination of both had you reeling, damn near seeing stars. Not only has it been forever since you’ve been eaten out, but it’s been even longer since you’ve been eaten out well.

“Matthew,” you breathe, exhaling loudly. You were trying to stay quieter, but you were quickly losing your inhibitions. The way he used his tongue on you, sucking on your clit alongside the fingers working their way inside you was making you dizzy, your stomach coiling in a familiar way. “Matt, please don’t stop,” you beg, reaching up to slide your fingers through his hair.

He listens, curling his fingers inside of you as his tongue traced shapes on your clit, the taste of you alone making him so hard it hurt.

You cried out and arched your back against the bed, fingers gripping the overgrown hair that adorned Matt’s head, moans growing louder than you were able to control. “Fuck!” You whined, thighs shaking as they tried to close around Matt, but he pulled his fingers out of you and used both hands to press your knees apart, keeping you exposed to him as he ate you through your orgasm, making you cry out even more, not used to the overstimulation.

He finally pulls away, kissing his way back up your torso until he’s hovering above your face, smiling down at you. “You okay?” He asks sweetly, using his left hand that isn’t covered in your arousal to brush your sweaty hair out of your face.

You pant as you look up at him, desperately trying to catch your breath. All you can do at the moment is nod, eyebrows furrowing together as you stare at him, almost innocently, and the look in your eyes makes his dick twitch in his pants.

He smirks down at you and reaches back down with his right hand, dragging his fingers over your clit again, making your legs twitch and try to close, a small whimper leaving your lips. “Sensitive,” you whine, but you still can’t help the moan that leaves your lips when he dips his fingers back inside you, pumping them slowly.

Your eyes flutter closed as your head rests in the pillow, back arching as you push your hips down to meet his fingers.

The mix of the pleasure and the immortality of the situation is ripping you apart, like an angel and a devil on your shoulder, but the devil was winning tonight and you weren’t even worried about the consequences.

“So good,” you whisper, finally able to respond. “But this is so wrong, Matt.”

He nods, leaning down to kiss your cheek. “I know,” he says quietly against your skin. “Do you want me to stop?” He slides his fingers out of you and starts making circles on your clit, slowly but surely bringing you back towards the edge of an orgasm, but the tone of his voice makes you completely confident that he would stop if you told him to, that he’d cover you up and leave you here to sleep, never to bring up this incident again. Your best friend was way too sweet to you for your own good; unfortunately for him, and especially for your boyfriend, you weren’t quite as good of a person.

“No point in stopping now, not when you got me wanting you so bad,” you tell him, a smirk falling onto your lips. “I need you to fuck me.”

Matt’s breath hitches in his throat at your filthy words, unable to even process the fact that he’s in bed with you right now, let alone the way you’re speaking. He would’ve been completely happy just getting you off and making you feel good, so getting to fuck you really just felt like a bonus for him. “Anything for my favorite girl.”

Matt stands up off the bed and slips his sweats and boxers off, stepping out of them before taking a step back towards the bed, blushing at the expression on your face.

“Holy shit, Matt, I would’ve fucked you a long time ago if I knew you were packing straight heat,” you laugh, gawking at the size of his dick. Your boyfriend was nothing in comparison. You don’t think you’d ever be able to go back after this.

“Shut up,” Matt chuckles, climbing back onto the bed and fitting himself between your spread legs, sitting up on his knees and pulling your hips up to meet his, ass resting on the tops of his thighs. “You sure you want this?” He clarifies, making sure a final time. You guys have already crossed so many lines, but this seemed like the final one, the point of no return. But you’re happy where you’re at, and you let him know by nodding at him, confirming that you’re ready to say fuck it to the boundaries set by the standard rules of friendship.

Matt shakes his head and leans over your body, face hovering above yours. “I want to hear you say it,” he whispers, eyes boring into your own.

You smile and reach your hand up to cup his cheek, tilting your chin up slightly. “I’m ready,” you tell him sweetly. “Fuck me, please.”

He’s nervous, and you could tell, but he pushes it aside as he sits back up and grabs the base of his dick, using his hand to line up the tip with your entrance, slowly sliding himself in until he’s buried to the hilt, a small moan leaving both of your mouths. “Shit, Matt,” you whine, reaching out to grab any part of him, something to ground you in this situation. He sees your efforts and leans over you once more, the angle of him just sitting inside you brushing up against all the right places.

Your hand reaches out and grabs his bicep, eyes fluttering open to look at his face above you, his expression slightly distant as he focused on the reality that has been the subject of every wet dream for at least the last five years. “You okay?” You ask him, and he lets out a breathy chuckle.

“I should be asking you that,” he states. “I’m fine, just can’t believe I’m finally getting to do this. I’ve wanted you for so long.”

You smile and wiggle your hips, pushing down into him. “Show me how long you’ve been waiting for this.”

Matt doesn’t hesitate when he hears those words, and he pulls his hips back just to snap back into you roughly, making you moan and throw your head back, your neck exposed for Matt to do whatever he wanted.

He keeps up a rough pace on you, grunts leaving his mouth every so often. “You feel so good,” he says lowly, leaning down to bury his head in your neck as he fucks into you relentlessly. His lips trail over your skin, until you feel his mouth open, a light suction on your neck sending you reeling.

You know he’s marking you up in places that are going to be visible now, and there’s no turning back from this, there’s no way you’ll be able to hide it without being obvious, but you just can’t find it in you to care.

“Fuck, Matt, you’re fucking me so good, don’t stop,” you cry out, hands reaching around his back, nails digging into his skin.

He listens, like the good boy he is, keeping up his pace on you. He sits up, though, your ass still planted on his thighs as he rocks his hips into you, his arms wrapping around your legs and holding you in place. “I’m not gonna last long like this, I’m so sorry,” he apologizes. He’s far too turned on to last as long as he normally does, too worked up and so enthusiastic about finally getting to fuck you after all these years.

“That’s okay, I’m so close,” you tell him, reaching down to start rubbing circles on your clit to push you farther towards the edge, wanting to finish with Matt, but he pushes your hand away, replacing it with his own, rubbing a quick back and forth motion on your clit in time with his thrusts. “I’ll take care of you,” he tells you, looking into your eyes. “I got you.”

Those words alone had you arching your back off the bed, gripping the sheets next to you as you came for the second time that night, legs shaking as you cried out, muttering out his name mixed in with obscenities. “Matt,” you whimper, breathing heavily as you came down.

He was still thrusting into you, slower and gentler now, but enough to still have you riled up despite the orgasm that just shook your body. “You’re doing so well for me,” he praised, sliding his slick covered hand over your thigh, rubbing the skin lovingly. “I’m so close, baby, where do you want me?”

“Anywhere you want,” you tell him, shaking your head. “I’m all yours.”

The words send him over the edge, his thrusts getting sloppy as he finished inside of you, shooting his load deep into your pussy. “Fuck,” he moans, hips coming to a halt fully inside of you as he collects his breath.

You guys are both silent for a moment before you make eye contact and start giggling, your hand coming up to cover your mouth as you did so, his shoulders shaking slightly. “Oh my god,” he speaks first, looking down as he pulls out of you, his seed spilling out slowly. He acts without thinking and reaches down, using his fingers to scoop it up and push it back inside of you, making you gasp.

“Matt,” you warn, and he snaps his head back up to look at you. “Sorry,” he says, a blush starting to cover his cheeks. “Just don’t wanna waste any.”

He pulls his fingers out and wipes them on the sheets, grimacing slightly. “Definitely going to have to wash these tomorrow, but that’s a tomorrow issue.”

You smile and reach towards him, grabbing his arm to pull him back down to you, sliding your hand up his arm and towards his cheek before pulling him into a soft kiss. He kisses you back happily, his clean hand resting on your waist.

As you both kiss, he moves to lay next to you and slides his hand down your hip until it rests on your leg, pulling it over him so you guys are cuddling face to face.

Matt pulls away from the kiss and smiles over at you. “I guess this would be a bad time to tell you I’ve had feelings for you for a really long time?” He raises his eyebrows as he speaks, pressing his lips in a thin, awkward smile when he’s done.

You laugh and shake your head, brushing a long strand of hair out of his eyes. “I think it’s perfect timing.”

He smiles wide and leans in to kiss you once more, holding your body close to his own.

-

You guys must’ve ended up under the blankets at some point during the night, and thank god for that, because it couldn’t have been later than 9am when you hear the sound of the bedroom door opening and the song Pony by Ginuwine blaring through a speaker, ripping you out of a deep sleep.

Your eyes tear open and you stare at where the noise is coming from, feeling the hand wrapped around your waist tightening before you both sit up and stare at the door, seeing Chris in the doorway jokingly dancing and grinding as he held the speaker up in his hand, looking at both of you on the bed.

You can’t help but throw your head back in laughter, the sight of him breaking into the room like this making you crack up. “Chris!” You yell between giggles, making sure you’re holding up the blanket to cover your chest.

Nick comes up and stands behind Chris, shaking his head. “I told him not to,” he states, clearly unamused with his brother’s antics.

Chris giggles and turns the music down, staring at the two of you in bed, one of you laughing and one of you glaring back at him. “Hey, I’m happy you guys finally fucked, just really wish it wasn’t in my bed.”

Matt narrows his eyes and reaches underneath him, grabbing the pillow he was previously laying on and flinging it at his younger sibling. “Chris, get the fuck out!”

-

a/n: …..

u likeee??? I definitely like this one a little less than the last one but it was still fun to write 🤭 please leave feedback and send requests on what to do next

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[joelscruff]

feelings on fire (joel miller x f!reader) 18+ PART TEN

masterlist | kofi | notifs | *spongebob narrator voice* 4 months later. well, i'm not gonna bore you all with excuses, god knows most of you have heard what's been goin' on with me at this point lmao. but yall have been so patient and lovely and i really really appreciate it. i hope you enjoy this chapter; it's a little bit of bliss before things get... interesting. there's still more to come (about four chapters or so) and i'll try to update much sooner next time but please remember i'm only one person & i write this for fun (and for free) in my spare time!!! ik it can be frustrating when there are long periods between updates but i'm trying my best, please know that. k love u bye 💕 chapter summary: you & joel enjoy your little weekend getaway, far from the prying eyes and ears of your parents. rating: 18+ explicit warnings: age gap (reader is early 20s, joel is mid 50s), unprotected p in v sex, creampies, dirty talk, praise kink, size kink (joel has a big dick), tummy bulge, deepthroating (or...attempted deepthroating), cum swallowing, fingering, pussy kisses, ridiculous amounts of fluff, namedropping one of my fav songs of all time because i can, the tiniest mention of sexual assault (aka noah) word count: 12.9k ao3

You think you might finally understand what it means to experience happiness.

Not the feelings you've faked for most of your life, not the plastered-on smiles and faux giggles, autopilot prayers and forced gratitude. No - real happiness. That tingling sensation of nothing but pure bliss, safety, love, and peace, something that's felt far out of your reach for most of your life. It swells in your chest, makes a home in your heart as you nuzzle into fluffy pillows, warm bedsheets, and feel yourself drift in and out of consciousness, completely and utterly relaxed. Happy, you can't help but think to yourself, I'm so happy.

You're aware of Joel's presence, fading in and out here and there as he wipes a damp cloth between your legs, across your stomach, down your thighs - taking care of you, making sure you're comfortable. Afterward he cuddles in behind you and wraps his arms around your middle, buries his face in the back of your neck and inhales deeply; you wonder if he's feeling the exact same way you are right now - god, you hope he is.

"That felt so good," you murmur to him softly, eyes still closed, "Felt so good, Joel."

He kisses your neck, holds you tighter in his embrace, "I know, babygirl."

"Can still feel you inside me," you breathe, "It's like you're still there."

He chuckles softly, "Not to burst your bubble but that's probably cum. Couldn't get all of it with the cloth." The words that should be dirty - should seem shameful - do nothing but send a warm tingle down your spine, a sleepy smile to your face. You know he's right - you can still feel something warm deep inside you, a slow trickle making its way to your opening, but there's something else. You're still pulsing every so often around the phantom of a shape, an echo of what was still there only a few moments ago.

"It's not just that," you shuffle in the sheets, nuzzling your face further into the pillow, "it's like... like you're still in there, spreading me open."

He groans and his grip around you tightens, fingertips pressing into the malleable softness of your belly. He leans down to press a small kiss to your ear, "Can't just say stuff like that, angel. Gonna get me hard again." You shiver.

"Good," you whisper, "'Cause I want you to do it again."

His legs tangle with yours under the sheets as he pulls you in, scruff nuzzling against the bare skin of your shoulder, "We'll wait a little bit," he murmurs, "You're gonna start feelin' a little sore soon, if you don't already."

"I don't," you breathe, and you mean it. "Doesn't hurt at all, really. It... it didn't hurt. I always thought it would hurt."

You can almost feel his frown against your skin, "S'not supposed to hurt," he murmurs, "Woulda stopped if you'd been in any pain."

You smile, "I know you would've."

He hums into your hair, strokes his hand down along your arm, "S'good," he mumbles, and you're suddenly aware of the heaviness in his voice, the way his lips wrap lazily around the words.

"Are you sleepy?" you ask softly.

"Yeah, baby," he breathes, "M'sleepy."

You smile at the adorable admission, then lean back into his embrace and settle in. The sun is starting to go down, casting the room in long orange and blue shadows, warm and comforting. Your eyes close again and you focus on that blissful feeling, on the weight of Joel's naked body behind you holding you close, the sound of his breathing, his smell. On the fact that you've never felt more safe in your entire life.

"I'm so glad it was you," you whisper, and you don't mind if he's already fallen asleep.

--

You're not sure how long you both nap, but you wake up soon after to a completely dark hotel room, save for the flickering lights from the traffic below and the warm glow of the buildings outside the window. Your eyes flutter for a few seconds as your brain reconnects you to the present, and you're suddenly very aware of a dull ache in your groin, an unpleasant throb that hadn't been there earlier.

"Ow," you mumble incoherently, reaching blindly for the blankets and pulling them back to peer down at yourself, but the room is so dark that it's difficult to see anything properly, "Ow."

"S'wrong?" you hear Joel mumble beside you, stirring from his own slumber.

You wince in embarrassment, shaking your head, "It's nothing, go back to sleep."

"Y'said 'ow'," you feel him sit up and reach over to turn on the lamp, "You okay?"

As soon as the lamplight floods the room your eyes cast downward, half expecting to see some medical emergency, some horrific reason for the vacation to end early, to ruin everything before it's barely even started - but thankfully it's none of those things. You're just a little swollen - puffier than usual - and aching, but not in a good way. You bring your hand down and cup yourself gently, hissing a bit when your fingers brush against your opening; it feels almost like a bruise.

"Oh, honey," Joel murmurs, and you turn your head to see his brows furrowing in concern, "Y'sore?"

You wince, biting your lip, "Um, a little."

He frowns and pulls his own side of the blankets back, and you can't help the warmth that floods your cheeks when you see his exposed body; the dark hair wisping across his tan skin, his soft belly and strong thighs - and his cock, soft and heavy and impossible not to look at. You've seen him naked several times at this point but every time still somehow feels like the first, like it's brand new. You watch as he crawls downward and gently places his hand on top of yours.

"Lemme see," he murmurs softly, and you allow him to pull your hand back, exposing your sore pussy to him. His brow furrows, "Aw baby, you're all swollen."

"Is that normal?"

He nods, eyes still trailing up and down, "It's normal," he assures you, "It's probably worse 'cause - well," he smiles sheepishly, peering up at you.

"'Cause you're so big," you finish for him, your own lips turning up into a smirk, and he chuckles.

"Yeah, that." You watch as he brings his hands down and very carefully thumbs your outer lips, pulls them apart to assess what's inside. He groans, and you're about to ask what's wrong when you see a thin stream of his cum dribble out onto the sheets below.

"Fuck," you both whisper at the same time, and when your eyes meet you can see that his are suddenly dark, glassy. You feel yourself begin to throb beneath his touch.

"Still full o'me," he murmurs, eyes trailing back down to where you're dripping, "Messy girl."

Your own eyes go hooded as you watch him lean down and press a small kiss to your clit; your hips buck up, a whimper slipping past your lips as his whiskers prickle deliciously against your sensitive skin. He smiles against you, kisses your clit again and darts his tongue out to taste, just for a moment. You whine.

"I know what you need, babygirl" he whispers, nosing your mound and closing his eyes, "I know what'll help."

Your mind races with possibilities. "Wh-what?"

He suddenly pulls back, crooked smile lighting up his beautiful face, "A bath. It'll help with the soreness." Oh. He presses another kiss to your clit, "If I can bring myself to stop kissin' this perfect pussy."

You giggle softly and he opens his eyes to look up at you again, smiling tenderly. He reluctantly pulls himself off you and climbs off the bed, reaching down to grab his discarded underwear from the floor. "I'll start runnin' the water," he tells you softly, pulling them on and taking a step forward to brush your hair out of your face, "You just relax, sweet girl. Don't move a muscle."

The bath is warm and inviting, lit candles lining the counter and floor and dousing the room in a warm glow; it's hard to believe only a few hours earlier you were on the verge of a panic attack on these very tiles. Now you lean back against the cool rim of the claw foot tub, eyes closed as you submerge yourself in the hot water. There's no panic or anxiety in your body anymore, just warmth and comfort and the welcome ache in your groin, the smell of vanilla in your nose.

"Good temp?" Joel asks softly nearby, and you hear his hand breach the surface of the water, testing the heat. You smile.

"Perfect," you breathe, eyes still closed, "Thank you."

His hand brushes lightly against yours under the water and he squeezes it gently, then murmurs, "I'll give you some privacy."

Your eyes snap open, "No," you cradle his hand in both of yours as your brows furrow, "Stay."

A smile breaks across his face, charming and boyish as he seats himself down next to the bathtub with barely any hesitation, like he'd been hoping you'd say that. He keeps hold of your hand beneath the water and tilts his face toward yours - you press your forehead against his and breathe a long sigh of relief.

"Feelin' okay?" he murmurs, "Emotionally?"

You nod, sighing contentedly, "More than okay," you whisper, "I... I still can't believe it actually happened." Your lips twitch upward and you press a soft kiss to his cheek, closing your eyes, "Thank you."

He squeezes your hand again beneath the water before pulling out and bringing it upwards to cradle your face, tilting your head to look at him. His eyes are still a bit sleepy, hair sticking up in all directions and that beautiful smile still lighting up his face as he thumbs your cheek.

"I should be thankin' you," he breathes, "For trustin' me like that, bein' so vulnerable with me." He leans in to kiss you tenderly, but his words send a sudden flutter of insecurity through your body and you pull back to look at him again, unsure.

"Was I... was I good at it?" you ask quietly, "Did I do okay?"

"Oh, angel," he murmurs, bringing his other hand up to cup both your cheeks and brush his nose gently against yours, "You did so good. So, so, so good."

He ends up washing your hair, a small but significant gesture that makes the feelings from earlier bubble up again, the warm fondness and tenderness and love. You lean back in the tub, eyes closed, lost in the sensations of his big hands deftly applying the shampoo and conditioner, massaging it into your scalp and making your eyes roll back. It's ridiculous how even this makes you throb beneath the surface, the ache dissipating a bit in the hot water. So much so that when he caps the conditioner and rinses your hair once again, you reach up to take his hand and squeeze, eyes still shut.

"Touch me," you whisper, voice already desperate, "Please."

He doesn't need any convincing, inching toward the side of the tub and reaching inside to cup your pussy in his big hand again, softly rubbing your clit. You whimper and tremble, gripping the edge of the tub for support and whining when he speeds up, circling and rubbing it exactly how you like it.

"Poor little pussy," you hear him murmur, "Just needs some relief after gettin' fucked like that, doesn't she baby?"

"Mmhmm," you manage to hum, squeezing the sides of the tub and nodding furiously, "Y-yeah."

"Took so much cock in this little hole," he whispers, and that's enough to send you over the edge, eyes snapping open as you shake and shiver in the hot water. You see him sitting there, smiling at you with a devious glint in his eyes. He knows exactly the effect he has on you.

--

"What do we do now?" you ask him softly from the couch a little while later, carefully scrunching a towel in your hair and watching as he changes the bedsheets upon your request - you'd felt a bit embarrassed asking, but you'd really rather not sleep in a wet spot. He'd been more than gracious in honoring your request.

It's late, but the nap and the bath have left you feeling wide awake, and you have to admit that you're feeling a bit hungry too despite the full meal earlier. Does sex make you hungry? You file it as a question to ask Tasha.

"Whatever you wanna do, darlin'," he says with a smile, turning down the sheets and gesturing for you to join him in bed again, "C'mere."

You give your hair one last squeeze and pad over to the bed, clad in Joel's Grateful Dead shirt from earlier today. You don't care in the slightest that it's not necessarily the cleanest article of clothing to be wearing after a bath - it smells like him, feels like him. You just can't get enough of him.

Insatiable.

You both climb back into bed and he pulls you in immediately, tugging you close and wrapping his big arms around you. You lean back into him and feel yourself grinning without even really thinking about it, eyes closing as you focus on the feeling of his chest moving back and forth against your back with every breath.

"Always look so pretty in my shirts, babygirl," he whispers in your ear, and it sends tingles down your spine, a rush of warmth to your heart. He kisses you gently and you listen as he inhales deeply, nose buried in your damp hair. His hand travels downward and you both watch as he cups your pussy yet again, warm and soft.

"Feelin' a little better?" he asks quietly, thumb trailing gently up and down your outer lips, "Still sore?"

"Better," you reassure him gently - and you mean it; the warm water did help to ease the ache.

He hums and continues to trace your soft lips, nosing your ear and breathing deeply again, and fuck, you could get used to this. This casual intimacy, being touched without any expectations, any fear or anxiety. Feeling safe and wanted and cared for in his embrace, no worrying about getting home early, no time limit looming. Just you and him.

I love you, you want to whisper.

Your stomach growls.

He removes his hand almost immediately. "Room service," he says with a chuckle, and your eyes snap open again as he reaches over and grabs the menu on the nightstand, placing it in front of you both, "Pick your poison."

Your eyes are drawn almost immediately to the dessert section, followed by a short wave of guilt. You're craving something sweet, but you can't help but think back to being a kid again, asking for treats and being denied, feeling as if your desires were unimportant, childish, silly.

But no, you're not that scared kid anymore. You're not. You won't be.

You bite your lip, "You know what I could really go for right now?"

"What?"

"It's silly, but-"

"It ain't silly, babygirl," he murmurs, and his big hand travels down to squeeze your thigh gently, a comforting gesture, "Whatever it is, it ain't silly."

Less than a minute later he's on the phone with room service, ordering you a hot fudge sundae.

You spend the rest of the night nestled in the warmth of your hotel bed, flicking between channels, legs tangled together beneath the sheets as you take turns scooping heaping spoons of ice cream back and forth. Your mouth and fingertips are sticky, chocolate lining your lips, dribbles of melted vanilla dolloped on your chin which Joel wastes no time in delicately lapping up with his tongue.

"God, you're so fuckin' sweet," he whispers to you, kisses you softly, darts his tongue out to taste again. You hum against his lips and try to keep your emotions at bay; he tastes like chocolate and vanilla and safety.

--

Waking up is different with the morning sun shining brightly through the hotel windows, but that's not the only thing that's different; you notice as your eyes flutter open that the ache in your groin is gone, replaced by a growing hunger and arousal in the pit of your stomach.

Oh, wow.

Joel's arms are around you, wrapped strong and solid, and when you turn within them and see him sleeping next to you, the hunger only grows. God, he's so handsome like this - the grey in his hair sparkling in the early light, jaw soft and lax with sleep, cheeks flushed. Almost angelic in his own way, gentle and peaceful.

Until his eyelashes begin to flutter delicately against the streams of sunlight, brow furrowing in sleepy confusion at your sudden movement; he's awake.

The desire in your belly burns.

"You look so cute," you whisper without even really thinking about it, and his eyelashes halt their fluttering to give you another look of confusion.

"Cute's not exactly a word I'd use to describe myself," he mumbles, voice thick with sleep, "S'all you."

"Well, I would," you reply with a smile, watching as he closes his eyes again and nestles his face into the pillow. You reach forward to gently thumb one of the lines at the corner of his mouth, deep-set and soft beneath your touch. His eyelids twitch but he doesn't open them, "You're so soft too," you admit quietly.

"Again," he breathes, lips turning up slightly into a sleepy smile, "Not a word I'd use."

"Cute and soft," you repeat, thumb moving downward to trace the shape of his bottom lip, "And mine."

He chuckles under his breath, face smooshing a little more into the pillow, "M'yours," he murmurs, "all yours."

All yours.

You lean in even closer and inhale deeply, nose trailing up and down along his temple. Your eyes almost roll back at the scent of him, the masculine and heady aroma of his sweat alighting your senses. You're wide awake now, pussy throbbing somewhere below as you press a kiss to the apple of his cheek, tongue darting out to taste his skin.

His eyes open halfway, eyebrow raising as he sleepily watches you work your mouth up and down the side of his face, breath coming quicker and more frantic as your legs wind around him under the sheets. Obliging your desperation, his big arms tighten around you and he rolls the both of you, allowing you to settle on top of his large, warm body.

You stare down at him, hunger clear in your eyes.

"You were inside me," you whisper.

His mouth turns up at the corners, "I was."

"It felt really good."

"It did."

You lean your face down to trace your nose along his cheekbone again, eyes hooded, voice needy.

"I want you to be inside me again."

He peers up at you, sleepiness already fading from his expression as he watches yours with mirrored desire, "Yeah? You want me to be inside you right now?"

You nod, "Yes, please."

"Then turn over on your side, angel."

A little confused but certainly not opposed, you do as he says, rolling back over onto your side and resting your head softly against your pillow. You feel his hand dip downwards beneath the sheets, then his fingertips glide smoothly along your abdomen. Your heart hammers in your chest when he lifts up your - or rather, his - shirt and thumbs your tummy gently.

"Are y'still sore?" he murmurs, "How d'you feel?"

"M'wet, Joel," you whimper, grinding back against the blankets and trying to feel him, "M'really wet."

"Lemme feel," he breathes, hand trailing downward even further. His fingers dip into your soft, soaked centre and a low groan rumbles in his throat, "Oh babygirl, so wet for me."

"Put it in," you whimper, not caring how pathetic and needy you probably sound, "Please, Joel, put it in me again."

"Christ," you hear him mutter, arousal burning in his voice, "Okay baby, hold still, I'll put it in. I'll make you feel better."

Seconds later you feel the heat of his tip crowding the space at your entrance, already wet and sticky. A soft moan falls from your throat at the sensation, eyes closing as you feel Joel's hand cup your leg and pull it upwards, holding you open. He hooks it in the crook of his arm, shuffling forward a bit and pushing the head of his cock inside your heat.

"Oh, fuck," you whine, head falling backwards. You feel his nose in your hair again, feel the stretch of your pussy and the widening of your thighs as he pulls your leg up even more.

"Yeah, there you go," he murmurs, pushing inside further. He goes slow, takes his time, until he's fully sheathed inside of you and your eyes are rolling back on their own accord, quiet whimpers tumbling past your lips. "Yeah, look at you takin' that cock."

As if by muscle memory your hand reaches downwards to cup the protruding shape of him at the bottom of your tummy, a low whine in your throat. He's so big inside you, nestled perfectly within the deepest parts of your body just like he'd been last night, large and warm.

"Feels so good," you manage to gasp out, other hand clenching into a fist against your pillow, "So good, so good." It's almost a mantra, voice breathless as you squish your face against the cotton and push back almost lazily against him, his balls settling heavy and warm at the base of your ass. You can feel every twitch of his shaft, the way the tip pulses against that special spot within.

"Yeah, you like bein' full like that, don't you baby?" he murmurs, "Don't even need me to move, do you? Just like feelin' it in there, huh?"

And you almost hate how right he is, how just the sensation of being so full of him already has you on the edge of an orgasm without any stimulation. Because you want more, you want what he gave you last night, want him to fuck you even firmer, deeper, without holding back. You want it to last hours.

But you know it's too much before he even starts to move, that familiar ache in your groin returning as your walls constrict around the long shape of him. He pulls out slowly, takes his time, pushes back in at a snail's pace. You feel a tickling sensation against your clit, his pubic hair pressing deliciously against the wet skin as he fills you - and without any warning, you start to come.

"Fuckfuckfuck," you cry out into the sunlit hotel room, trembling in his arms, legs shaking. You can tell in his body language behind you that he's taken aback by your sudden release, hand suddenly dropping from your calf so he can palm your sternum and pull you against him.

"Oh, honey," he groans, simultaneously tender and aroused, "Are you comin', baby? You comin' just from bein' stuffed full like that?"

"Yes," you grit out, voice a high keen as your body shakes and your release stretches out before the both of you in quick spasms, "Yes, I'm sorry."

"Nonono, no sorries," his voice is honey in your ear, fingertips grazing your nipples as he lays his palm flat against your chest, "You're a good girl, angel. You're such a good girl."

You continue to spasm on his cock, legs quivering and pathetic whines tearing from your throat until your orgasm has passed and you're just leaning back into his embrace, eyes closed. You breathe deeply, lashes fluttering when he noses your jaw and presses a soft kiss to the space beneath.

"S'alot for you," he murmurs, "I know it's a lot, babygirl. Don't ever gotta apologize for comin' too fast, not to me."

You hum softly, still extremely aware of his girthy size stretching you out somewhere below. Your eyes open and you peer downwards, brows scrunching in wonder and pleasure when you see where you're joined, where his flesh meets yours. You really are full, the base of his cock barely visible beneath your folds, the pubic hair that had caused your early release still pressed against your outer lips.

"How does it even fit?" you ask softly, almost by accident, but he just chuckles.

"The human body is a hell of a thing," he murmurs, kissing your cheek and pulling you in even closer, shuffling you on his dick just a little bit and making you wince a bit with oversensitivity, "You want me to pull out?"

"No," you shake your head and readjust yourself in his embrace, taking a breath, "No, I want you to keep going."

"Y'sure?"

"I'm sure."

He doesn't need telling twice. Within seconds he's resumed his slow and careful thrusts, almost rhythmic in their presses and pulls, filling you and emptying you in melodic succession. You reach down and take his big hand in yours, squeeze his fingers and let him fuck you like he had last night - tender, soft, comfortable. It almost doesn't feel real; how are you in a hotel room in another city, wrapped up in bed with a man three times your age, his cock buried to the hilt inside your body while you whimper and twitch in his arms? How did you get here?

"Y'know, women are a bit different than men in the orgasm department," Joel says gently behind you, stroking your hand with his thumb, "You might be able to come again if we try."

Your eyebrows go up, "Really?"

"Mmhmm," his hand slips from yours and he reaches it downward to carefully prod one of his fingers against your sensitive clit. You buck in his arms but don't protest, watching as he temporarily halts his slow thrusts to rub you softly. Your eyes go hooded, body melting like jelly in his arms as his his thick fingers slowly begin to work against the already swollen bud.

"Feel good?" he whispers.

"Yes."

He continues his careful circling, presses a kiss to your shoulder and resumes fucking into you. The sounds are pornographic in nature, surrounding your senses and filling the room with the low slap of his hips against your ass and the wet squelch of your juices dripping down his palm. But it somehow doesn't feel dirty or shameful - in fact, it's hard to imagine anything that feels more right than this.

"Joel," you breathe shakily, face twisting against the pillow again, heart pounding.

"I know, feels good doesn't it, babygirl?" he noses your skin and breathes you in, hooks your leg under his arm a bit more and groans softly, "God, you're so fuckin' tight. Such a tight fuckin' pussy."

It's your pussy, you want to breathe, it's yours. I'm yours. But you can barely get any words out as his thrusts pick up speed, as the sounds get louder and his fingers against your clit become firmer in their movements. You can feel yourself teetering on the edge again, the fire in your belly burning hotter than ever as you let him crowd your space as much as possible, let his body push yours further and further until your eyes are rolling back and all you can feel is the steady thrust of his big cock and the girth of his fingers against your pussy.

"I'm coming," you moan out weakly, "M'coming again, Joel."

You don't hear what he says in response, ears muffled as if you're underwater, pleasure spreading throughout your body and hitting you at full force like a hurricane as he fucks you through it. You're barely aware of the sounds you're making, high pitched and almost feral as his hips slap against yours a few more times. And then you feel it, the hot pulses of his cum painting your insides, filling you up as his cock spasms and twitches deep inside.

"Oh, fuck," he groans, voice thick with pleasure and sleep as he buries his face in your hair, hips stuttering, "Fuck. Take it, there you go."

Yeah, you could get used to this.

--

You'd been pretty sure you wouldn't leave the hotel room this weekend, just like you'd told him a few days prior. The thought of staying wrapped up in bedsheets, warm bodies pressed up against each other, sharing soft kisses and quiet whispers and tender looks...it'd be more than enough for an enjoyable getaway.

But it's hot, way hotter than you'd anticipated before arriving - and the pool is calling your name.

Or maybe something else is calling your name.

You stand in the bathroom and stare at your bikini clad form, a smile curving your lips as you assess the thin straps and baby pink frills. To think you'd tried to return this to Joel, briefly refused to wear it. Now you're about to don it in front of a hotel pool full of people like a normal woman, like someone without shame, without guilt, without a mother who'd skin her alive if she saw her wearing it.

Your smile falters.

You'd texted your mother after getting out of bed, apologized once again for missing her calls last night and told her you had a "busy" day at the festival ahead of you, that you'd let her know when you leave tomorrow. All she'd said in response was Ok.

You'd climbed back into bed defeatedly, finding a home against Joel's naked form, "She's mad at me," you'd murmured softly against his bare chest, squished into his side with his heartbeat thrumming in your ear.

"Don't think about her right now," he'd whispered, carding his fingers gently through your hair, "Think about this. How this feels."

He'd peered at you so softly, so full of warmth and affection. Those three words had been on the tip of your tongue again, so close to tumbling past your swollen lips - but you'd held it in.

It hadn't stopped you from texting Tasha though:

we had sex and i love him.

UM!! UMMM!!!! DETAILS????

monday!!! i'll call you

🫡 ok slut just leave me hangin i see how it is. AT LEAST TELL ME HE LIKED THE LINGERIE.

oh he liked it :)

queen shit

"Hi, pretty girl," Joel's voice says suddenly, and you're snapped from your reflection in the mirror to find him leaning against the doorway, clad in a pair of swim trunks and a Bob Dylan t-shirt, "Look at you."

You pose a little bit, hand on your hip, "Think the pool boys will like it?"

He laughs lightly, shaking his head, "I don't doubt it, but they might have some competition." He holds out his hand for you and you take it, stepping forward to let him pull you in close.

"They couldn't hold a candle to you," you whisper honestly, and he kisses your forehead with a smile, thumbing the corner of your mouth.

"Wait 'til you see my breaststroke, that'll really get you goin'."

You snort and slap his arm playfully, "Lead the way, pool boy."

--

Joel may have just been teasing about his swimming ability, but he certainly hadn't been wrong about it getting you going. You watch from the comfort of a lounge chair as he whips back and forth across the broad expanse of the hotel pool like a bullet, kicking off from end to end without much effort at all. His arms are strong and lean, body fast and nimble as the water splashes around his broad form. Every so often his face peeks up from the water and you catch a glimpse of his drenched scruff, the way the greying locks of his hair curl down his forehead into his eyes. God, he's fucking gorgeous.

You're laid out in your bikini just watching, letting him expel some energy before you join him. He'd told you he likes swimming but doesn't get to do it as much as he'd like, what with his work responsibilities. You wonder if he'd ever want to swim in your parent's pool...

You shake the thought away as soon as you think of it. There's no feasible way that could work, no option that wouldn't involve an obscene amount of risk. But still... the thought of watching him from the comfort of your own backyard, just completely alone without any bystanders or hotel guests...

"You gonna join me or what?" Joel suddenly calls from the water, and you blink the thoughts away and throw him a grin. He wades near the shallow end, arms coming up to lean against the concrete edge as he peers at you. "Don't keep me waitin', baby."

You feel your cheeks warm, unable to help but glance back and forth to see if anyone is watching, listening. Everyone else seems to be minding their own business, lost in their own conversations, their own fun. Nobody cares that you're here with him. Nobody cares what you're wearing.

Slipping from the lounge chair, you totter over to the edge where Joel resides and slowly sink down onto the concrete, kicking your legs over the side to seat yourself in front of him.

"God, these legs," he almost groans, immediately taking one in his hands and massaging your calf, your knee, your thigh, "Look at you."

"Stop acting like you haven't seen me naked," you tease, though you still feel a bit shy underneath his gaze as he moves his attention to your other leg.

"Doesn't mean I'm gonna stop admirin' this body," he seems lost in his own movements as he caresses the space behind your knee, "You're so god damn beautiful." His hands suddenly wrap around your waist and without much warning he's carefully pulling you down into the water, moving you in close. On instinct your arms come up to wrap around his neck.

"How the hell am I here with you right now, huh?" he murmurs, leaning down to brush his nose gently against yours, "How're you even real?"

"I could ask you the same thing," you reply a little breathlessly, "I've been asking myself that since we got here."

He slowly turns your bodies in the water, peering down into your eyes like you're the only people here - and you might as well be. You're unable to stop yourself from leaning up to press a kiss to his lips, from letting your tongue dart out to gently explore his mouth; he tastes like toothpaste and chlorine.

"Y'gonna swim with me?" he asks after you've pulled away, pupils blown a bit wider, "Gonna put that little swimsuit to good use?"

"I think I'm putting it to good use right now," you breathe, inching closer so your breasts are pushing against his chest. You're genuinely surprising yourself at your own boldness, especially in such a crowded place - it's almost like you're a different person here, the person you're supposed to be, confidence coursing through your veins. You stand on your tiptoes beneath the water, bringing one of your legs up to wind around his waist.

"Hmm," he hums, and his face is still dripping with water, the wrinkles in his skin peppered with little droplets that make you crazy, "You do have a point there, darlin'."

You lean in again to kiss him, feel a burst of pride in your chest when you see the sudden hunger and arousal in his expression. Just before your lips touch however, you pull back from him and throw yourself into the water, turning back to toss him a cheeky grin.

"Gotta catch me first," you giggle, then speed off in the opposite direction, leaving him standing there with a look of surprise etched on his face - followed quickly by a look of determination.

"Oh, I will," he practically growls, diving into the water in the same manner and reaching out to grab your ankle.

Time passes quickly in the pool, Joel chasing you back and forth, catching you time and time again until you're a giggling mess with tears streaming down your face and his fingers pinching your sides. You can't remember the last time you had this much fun, felt so free and light. You suppose your night out with Tasha had been a fun experience for the most part, until you remember the vague feeling of an unfamiliar body pressed against you from behind and the smell of alcohol crowding your senses on the dance floor.

No, don't think about that.

Before long you've exhausted yourselves, settled back near the edge of the pool where you started and just softly talking to each other. His big hands are all over you beneath the water, palms wide on your bare hips and tummy, caressing your thighs and your back, touching everywhere he can reach. You feel almost lightheaded with desire, eyes hooded as you peer up at him and tighten your arms around his neck, pull him closer and silently beg for more. You can feel the shape of his hardening cock through his swim trunks, pressed wet and heavy against your thigh. It makes you salivate.

You suddenly hook your chin into his shoulder, bury your face in his neck and whisper, "I wanna suck it, Joel."

"Yeah?" he murmurs, hands exploring your back and holding you tighter against him, letting you rut softly against his bulge, "You wanna go back to the room and suck on it, babygirl?"

You nod ferociously against him, "Yes. Please."

It doesn't take long at all for you both to be out of the pool and making your way back over to the chairs to grab your towels. It's frantic the way you rush to dry off, slipping back into your flip flops and shaking the water from your hair as quickly as possible. Joel follows suit, ruffling his own towel through his hair and making your body burn with need, lost in how sexy he looks with water droplets cascading down his large and strong form, dipping down his sternum and into his belly button. All you can think while you look at him is how badly you want to lick, to taste.

You're making your way back toward the entrance together when a woman runs up behind you, calling out, "Wait, hang on!" You both turn, confusion in your expressions as she reaches you and holds out something in her hand - your phone.

"I think you or your dad left this behind, sweetie," she says with a smile and places it in your grasp, "Gotta be careful!"

"Th-thank you," you manage to stutter out, eyes wide as she nods and turns away from you to head back toward the pool.

You stand there dumbstruck for a moment, thoughts muddled.

You or your dad.

Your dad.

You turn to Joel then. He's looking at you with what you can only describe as apprehension, lips downturned into a frown as he stands and waits for you to say something - anything. You stare back, words failing you.

And then you burst out laughing.

His apprehension turns into a smile, eyes crinkling at the corners as he laughs along with you and squeezes your hand in his tightly - as if to say, this isn't wrong, what we have isn't wrong and you know that. And you do, which is why he has to practically drag you back inside the hotel as you double over and heave out laugh after laugh, tears in your eyes.

"Silly girl," you hear him mumble under his breath fondly as he leads you to the elevator, and all you can do is keep giggling.

--

"I love your cock."

Your knees dig into the plush rug of the hotel room, ass sitting atop the balls of your feet as you kneel between Joel's wide legs. He's sitting comfortably on the couch, one hand resting to the side while the other strokes circles into the apple of your cheek. His cock is out of his swim trunks, heavy and hard in your palm as you slowly stroke him up and down, up and down, heart pounding in your chest.

You've done this to him before, you remind yourself, and he said it was good.

But not like this, another part of you argues, not properly.

"Yeah, you love it?" he murmurs, breaking you out of your thoughts. With his words his hand drops from your face and joins yours on his shaft, helps direct it toward your cheek so he can press the tip ever so gently against it, "What d'you love about it, baby? Tell me. Wanna know."

"It's so big, Joel," you practically whimper, brows furrowing together at the sensation of his warm stickiness on your face, "So big and so thick and long."

"I know, baby," he coos softly, smearing it along your jaw in a way that has goosebumps rising all over your flesh, "Bigger than your pretty face, huh?" At his words he delicately lays the length of his cock against your face from base to tip, lets it rest there as you close your eyes and try to calm your breathing. You're so fucking turned on.

"Big," you repeat, as if no other words can find their way to your brain, as if your brain doesn't even exist; all that exists is this. The feeling of his warm dick laying heavy across your face, precum leaking out onto your forehead.

"And what's it taste like, babygirl?" He's suddenly moving it downward, towards your mouth, and you happily lean forward to lap at the tip. It pulses against you, leaks onto the pink softness of your tongue. "Tell me what it tastes like."

"Kinda salty," you whisper, peering up at him with big eyes, "But good, it still tastes good to me." Your nose scrunches and you peer up at him sheepishly, "Tasha said it's not supposed to."

He laughs breathlessly, taps the tip against your bottom lip, and when more precum dribbles out you allow it to drip into your mouth. You swallow, eyes never leaving his, then swirl your tongue all around the head before slowly taking it into your mouth and suctioning carefully.

"God, you make me fuckin' crazy," his voice rumbles in his chest, eyes hooded, "Look at you suckin' on my cock." After a few seconds he pulls it out and taps your lips with it again, hissing a bit through his teeth, "Fuck, this mouth. And those eyes," his head leans back against the couch and he groans, low and deep, "You gotta stop lookin' at me like that, angel. M'not gonna last."

"How am I looking at you?" you ask shyly, a smile playing at your lips.

"Like... you're just so new to everything."

"But I am," you say with a breathless giggle, "It is new to me."

He smiles fondly down at you on your knees in front of him, so vulnerable, "I know," he tells you, "It makes me want you so bad."

"You have me," you whisper, leaning forward to mouth at the head of his cock once again, "M'yours, Joel."

His lids go heavy as you suckle gently on the tip again, reveling in the masculine taste of him and the way you can feel his heartbeat on the tip of your tongue. You suck it the same way you did last time - like a sucker or a popsicle - and you hope it feels good to him, hope you're doing it right.

"That's so good, baby," he murmurs, and you whimper at his praise.

You pop him out of your mouth and take a deep breath, peering up at him curiously, "Can...can you..."

His brow furrows, "Can I what, angel?"

"Can you show me how to... how to take all of it? Like, how to put it in my throat?"

The expression on his face is hard to describe, a mix of disbelief and untamed arousal. His mouth opens to speak but he doesn't say anything, taking a few seconds to formulate a response before clearing his throat and giving you a weak - and slightly wrecked - smile.

"Y'sure you wanna try that?" he asks you, ever the gentleman, "That's....it's a lot to take in your throat, babygirl."

"I know," you breathe, sincerity in your eyes, "But I wanna try."

He reaches down and thumbs a stray hair from your face, pushes it behind your ear, "You're probably gonna gag," he murmurs gently - a warning. "It might be uncomfortable for you."

You raise an eyebrow, "So... you don't want me to?"

He laughs breathlessly, "I... I didn't say I don't want it. But I don't want you to try something you don't feel ready for," he frowns, "Don't want you to feel any pressure with me."

"I don't," you admit honestly, "I don't feel any pressure, Joel, I promise. I just...really wanna try it. I want you to show me."

He takes a deep breath, strokes your cheek gently and then reaches down to hold the base of his cock again. Your hands fall to his thighs, still clad in his swim trunks.

"Lemme just see how far you can go without gaggin' first," he tells you softly, patiently, "Want you to stop when you feel it in that spot, okay? Don't go any further than that."

You nod, already beyond excited that you're learning something new, something that'll make him feel good. You open your mouth to take him back inside but he touches your face again, stopping you.

"Deep breath," he advises quietly. You do as you're told.

He helps guide the fat head of his cock past your lips, watches as you very slowly ease yourself down. You close your eyes, all your focus centered on this singular task, fighting to push past the slight discomfort of having your mouth stuffed so full. It takes barely a moment for you to reach the point he was talking about, when you feel the head of his cock brush ever so slightly against your gag reflex. On instinct, your eyes snap open, your entire body freezing in place.

"Right there?" he asks quietly, but you know he's not waiting for an answer, knows you couldn't talk even if you wanted to, "That's so much baby, good girl." His praise send throbs of pleasure to your pussy, warmth to your cheeks. Your eyes meet his and you can see how turned on he is, see the way the corners of his mouth twitch with pleasure. "Let go when you're ready, honey."

You hold yourself there for a few more seconds, eyes watering a little bit as you hold his gaze, just testing the power of your lungs and the strain of your jaw. When it becomes too much you pull your mouth off him and find yourself gasping for breath, fingers digging into the meat of his thighs as drool spills down your chin.

"How was that?" he asks, thumbing your cheek again with one hand and stroking himself with the other, working your saliva up and down his length, "Uncomfortable?"

You shake your head, "It was good," you whisper, voice a bit crackly, "I wanna try and take more, can I?"

He nods, smiles encouragingly and taps his swollen cockhead against your bottom lip again, slow and tantalizing, "Course you can, babygirl," he murmurs, "Deep breath."

You inhale deeply again, gathering as much air into your lungs as possible before sinking your mouth down onto him and allowing his thick girth to fill you all over again. This time when you feel him reach that spot, you let yourself keep going just a little bit further, allow the head of his cock to push more firmly against it and slip the tiniest bit into the back of your throat.

You gag immediately.

It's very loud; a dry wretch that you can admit sounds absolutely horrific in the current circumstance. Before you can even really process what to do next, he's tugging you off his cock, voice suddenly worried, frantic, "Okay, no, that's too much," he says quickly, and you look up to see him shaking his head, "You're gonna hurt yourself."

"M'fine," you try to garble out, but you're shocked when just talking suddenly sends you into a coughing fit. You bang on your chest and squeeze his thigh with your other hand, feeling more drool cascade down your chin and onto your bare chest.

"Angel," he says soothingly, leaning forward to pat your back, brows furrowed again in concern, "I'm sorry, honey."

You shake your head, "I-I'm okay," you splutter out, "Just gimme a second."

"It's too much," he repeats, almost pleading, "Please, baby, I don't wanna see you struggle, that's not fun for me."

As much as you hate the idea of giving up, you have to admit that he's right. That wretch had not been pleasant, and while you think you could eventually learn to take all of him, maybe forcing yourself to do it when you're supposed to be having fun on vacation isn't the best time.

"Okay," you mumble defeatedly, sitting back on your knees, "But I still wanna suck it."

He laughs again, relief flooding his features as he leans back on the couch and smiles crookedly at you, "You can still suck it, darlin'. Just take your time and don't push your limits, alright? Promise me."

"I promise."

You spend the next fifteen minutes or so playing with Joel's cock, stroking it with your hand, kitten licking along the shaft and head, just touching as much as you can without any time pressure for once. He pets your hair as he watches you, thumbs your cheeks and dimples, small groans tumbling past his lips, face scrunched in pleasure as you explore. You take as much of him as you can in your mouth, bob up and down slowly with your eyes trained on his face, feel the way his thick length twitches and pulses against your tongue.

It's almost feral the way you drink him down, hollowing your cheeks and basking in the way his body responds to you. You're so wet, aching to touch yourself but wanting this moment to be just for him, a thank you for this weekend, this hotel, for everything. Instead you palm his balls, roll them in your palm and revel in the desperate sounds he makes.

"I love your cock," you whine, repeating your earlier statement as you fist it up and down with spit pooling at the corners of your mouth, "I love it so much, Joel." You can feel yourself dripping in your bikini bottoms, feel your own slick gathering on your inner thighs.

"I know, baby," he gasps out, running one hand through his hair and the other through yours as his belly tenses and untenses, as his thighs tremble, "I know you love it, s'all yours, baby. S'your cock."

"My cock," you echo, almost a whimper, "Mine."

"Yours, it's yours," he moans loudly, hands curling into fists as his head hits the back of the couch, "Shit, I'm gonna come."

"Come in my mouth," you tell him immediately, wasting no time in sinking back down onto his length. He doesn't ask if you're sure; he's too far gone to be a gentleman anymore, and you love it. You watch as he suddenly sits up on the couch, reaches both hands forward and cradles your head in them firmly. He helps you move up and down, groaning as he does, and then-

His cock pulses on your tongue, thick and heavy, bobbing against the roof of your mouth. You feel a burst of cum hit the back of your throat, then another, and another, all the while Joel moans and holds your head in place, toes curling into the rug. Your eyes roll back as he fills your mouth, overwhelmed by the salty taste and thick texture, and - without really meaning to - you swallow around him to make more space. He practically whines at the sensation, pulsing once more to release one final burst of his spend.

And then he's falling back against the couch, cock popping out of your mouth, expression dazed. Without thinking about it you swallow the rest of his cum, eyelashes fluttering at the odd sensation of it all slipping down your throat. So much, gone in an instant. It's only then that you actually realize what you've done.

"I swallowed it," you say, panic suddenly brewing in your stomach, "Was I supposed to swallow it?"

He laughs softly, covers his mouth with the back of his hand, "It is perfectly fine that you swallowed it, darlin'," he smiles wide and opens his arms, "C'mere."

You clamor off your knees and crawl into his lap immediately, straddling his thighs and pressing your wet bikini bottoms against the slope of his belly. He lets out a little groan, pulls you in and strokes your hair.

"You did so good," he praises you softly, kisses your temple, "So good, baby. Made me come so much."

"There was a lot," you tell him, nuzzling into his neck and letting your breathing slowly even out, "S'why I swallowed it, I was trying to make room."

"Was it okay? It didn't make you gag, did it?"

You shake your head, a pout on your lips, "Felt good in my mouth," you whisper, "I liked it."

He hums, hands trailing from your hair to your bare back where he unclasps your bikini top and lets it cascade to the floor, then reaches down and tugs at your bottoms. You lift up carefully, let him slip them down your thighs and watches as you kick them off, leaving you fully naked in his lap.

"So pretty when you're bare like this," he whispers, and it sends more slick to your folds, oozing down and making a mess on his tummy. He cups your pussy in one hand and slides two fingers easily inside of you, thumb rubbing circles against your clit. You grip his arm, eyes falling closed and pitiful little sounds slipping from your mouth. "My good girl deserves a reward for suckin' my cock so good, swallowin' all that cum, don't you think?"

You nod, biting down on your lip and letting him fuck you with his digits, eyes rolling behind your lids.

"Yeah, you do," he answers for you, "You deserve it, angel. Always."

He makes you come easily, leaving you a messy, twitching heap in his lap as your arms wrap around his neck, body going lax and loose. After a few moments he picks you up and carries you to the bathroom, helps you into the shower, smiles when you peer blearily up at him through your afterglow.

"Just close your eyes and lean against me," he tells you softly as the water falls, removing his swim trunks and getting in to stand behind you, "I'll get you cleaned up, sweetheart."

--

You nap after your shower, exhausted and sated in every possible way. Joel wakes you up around two o'clock with more room service - sandwiches and soup that you devour with bright eyes and light conversation side by side in bed. It's domestic bliss the way he thumbs mustard from your lips, pours you more water, slices your key lime pie and feeds it to you with a fond smile.

I love you I love you I love you.

"Would it absolutely ruin this moment if I suggested tryin' our hand at a hymn?" he asks when you've both finished, wiping the crumbs on his fingers with a napkin and gesturing to his guitar case in the corner of the room.

You grimace, "I guess not."

"I'm just thinkin' about your parents," he places his hand on your hip - clad in another one of his shirts - and gives you a sympathetic smile, "It's probably best to pick somethin' and have it ready."

You nod. You know he's right, that your lack of preparedness these past few weeks has been pretty reckless considering it's been the entire "reason" you've been seeing him. With a sigh you slip out from under the covers and traipse over to the couch, listening as Joel unclasps the guitar case.

"I did some research," he tells you as he walks over, hooking the strap over his shoulders as he goes, "I think our best bet for an easy tune is How Great Thou Art. Pretty repetitive chord progression, only uses G, C, and D."

You make a face, crossing your arms, "I can't believe I have to do this."

He laughs, "It was either that or Come Ye Sinners, and I think that one's a little too on the nose, don't you think?" He tosses you a smile and you can't help but return it, feeling your frustration melt away under his gaze.

"Can we do that thing again where I get a reward?" you ask shyly, biting your lip. His eyebrows go up, a smirk lighting his face.

"Hmm, I think that's doable," he sits down beside you, tuning the guitar, "What'd you have in mind?" You notice the way his eyes dart toward your groin and your cheeks warm.

"I was actually thinking that maybe..." your hands play with the hem of his shirt nervously, unsure what he'll say, "maybe you could play something for me? You said last night that you've written some songs," you shrug, trying to be nonchalant, "I'd... I'd really like to hear one, if you wouldn't mind."

He peers at you for a few seconds, smirk fading briefly only to be replaced with a tender smile, eyes softening as he gazes at you. Warmth blooms in your chest. You never want him to stop looking at you like that.

"I can do that," he tells you quietly, reaching up to scratch the back of his neck, "I mean... I can't promise it'll be good, but-"

"I don't care."

He chuckles and nods, grips the guitar again and clears his throat, "Well, alright then. Let's get started."

For the first time ever, the lesson is actually a lesson. No undercurrent of sex, no inappropriate touching or sensual glances, no teasing or filthy words. You're not sure how you're able to hold yourself back so easily, able to really focus on what Joel is saying and showing you, helping place your fingers in the right locations and teach you the strumming techniques. Maybe it's because you're tired - you did come three times already today - but it's not just that.

It just feels so... normal. So easy. You think back to that first lesson, the nervousness you'd felt and the pounding of your heart in your chest, the anticipation and the fear.

It's different now. Now that he's been inside you, become one with you, it's like your whole dynamic has changed - for the better. Of course you still feel that curious nervousness, the innocence, the electricity between you. But there's something so solid and tangible about it now, something certain. Something real.

He shapes your fingers along the neck of the guitar, praising you softly every time you play a note that sounds right, encouraging you as you repeat the G chord a few times, then C, then D. You strum along slowly, taking your time, and before you know it you're playing something that actually doesn't sound half bad.

"We definitely need to work on buildin' up those calluses," he murmurs, stroking the tips of your fingers under his thumb, "Well... If you're gonna do this long-term, I mean."

You peer at him curiously, tilting your head to the side. He looks sheepish, like he's said something he hadn't meant to.

"You think I could do this, like... for real? As a hobby?"

His mouth turns up at the corners and he nods, "I think you can do anything you set your mind to, darlin'."

Your heart is suddenly in your throat at his words, emotion bubbling under the surface of your skin. You drop your hand from the guitar and reach up to cup his face, pulling him toward you to press a gentle kiss to his lips. He kisses you back just as soft, just as careful.

"Thank you," you whisper, tears pricking in your eyes, "Thank you for saying that."

He presses his forehead to yours, shakes his head ever so slightly, "Don't gotta thank me for sayin' what's true, angel. You deserve to hear it every single day."

You finish the lesson with tears still welling in your eyes, a lump in your throat. When you lean the guitar against the side of the couch he cradles your face in his hands and gently kisses the tears away, brushes his lips along your eyelids and cheeks, your jaw and your lips, saying everything without saying anything at all.

"Okay," you sigh, taking a deep breath and opening your eyes to smile sweetly at him, "Time for my reward."

He chuckles and rolls his eyes a little, reaching for the guitar and beginning to tune it again. You watch as he twists the keys, strums a little here and there, hums softly for each note to match his voice. Anticipation rises in your chest.

"Now, uh," he clears his throat a bit, avoiding eye contact, "It's been a while since I played this one but it's, uh," he takes a breath, "It's one I wrote when Sarah was born. Used to sing it to her to help her fall asleep."

You melt at the words, smiling wider, "What's it called?"

He finally meets your eyesight, lips pressing together sheepishly, "Sarah."

Oh, duh. You nod in encouragement, leaning back against the armrest of the couch and waiting for him to begin. He takes another deep breath, dropping his gaze to watch his fingers shape the first chord. It's then that you notice his hands - usually deft and steady - are trembling a little bit, so much so that he has to readjust his position on the strings a few times.

He's nervous.

He stares at his hand, takes another deep breath.

You wait.

"Sorry," he mumbles under his breath, "Sorry, just gimme a minute."

"It's okay, take your time." Your voice is barely a whisper, awestruck by the sudden vulnerability you're witnessing. He'd agreed to the reward so quickly, you'd been sure he didn't mind. But now as you sit here waiting, you're not so sure. You watch him take more deep breaths, watch as he closes his eyes and seems to center himself.

"If you don't want to-"

"I want to," he says immediately, shaking his head, "I want to, I've just... I haven't sung in a while."

Your brow furrows, confused, "You sang yesterday in the car, didn't you? And you sang Tangled Up In Blue when we first met, and that other one, the one from the eighties."

His lips turn up at the corners, a welcome smile, "Take On Me."

"Yeah, that one."

He sighs, tightening his grip on the guitar, "It's not that I haven't sung I guess. Wrong wordin'," he bites his lip, "It's moreso that I haven't sung this one. Or any of my originals. Not for a long time."

You frown, "How come?"

"I guess... I just..." he searches for the words, staring at the floor, "No one's really asked me to. And it's not like I'm playin' gigs or tourin' or any of that pipe dream stuff I thought about when I was a kid." He laughs humorlessly, like the concept is ridiculous, "So I guess I just kinda... stopped, after a while."

You feel a sudden sadness that you can't really explain, picturing that bright-eyed little version of Joel, stuck in a household that wouldn't let him grow, wouldn't let him be himself. All those dreams and big ideas, dashed before he was able to get out and make his mark. Life getting busy, too busy, other responsibilities taking up all his time until the thing he loved most became nothing but a memory. A pipe dream.

It makes your heart ache.

"D'you mind if I just..." he meets your gaze again finally, eyes soft and a little sad, "Could I maybe just hum it? Instead? I know that's kind of a cop-out, but-"

"Of course you can," you breathe out, hand coming down to rest atop his knee, "Of course you can hum it."

"I'm sorry, baby, I know you wanted -"

"It's hard being vulnerable, Joel," you interrupt him again, shaking your head and stroking your thumb against his skin, "God knows it's been hard for me, and you've been nothing but patient." You give him a watery smile and he returns it, "Please take your time. I can be patient too, I promise."

You can tell how much he appreciates it. He reaches down and picks up your hand, presses a gentle kiss to the back of it before setting it back down and taking one last deep breath.

"Well, here it is," he says with a little more confidence, a smile playing at his lips.

You've heard him play before, obviously; you've already seen the way his fingers work the strings like it's just second nature, the way his thumb strums out the chords effortlessly. But this time is different. Knowing what he's playing is completely original, born from his own creativity out of love and devotion, a father's affection and protectiveness, it just sounds special. New. He begins to pluck out a soft, slow, soothing melody that immediately puts you at ease, makes you lean back further against the couch and loosen your body. It's tender, quiet - a lullaby.

He hums softly, voice crackling a bit in his throat at first but then settling into a smooth and comforting sound. It's almost like a waltz, the way the chords change back and forth, in and out, slow and steady. Of course you wonder what the real words are, what his quiet hums are substituting, but you find that it doesn't really matter. What matters is the look on his face, eyes distant, as if he's picturing his daughter as she was when she was little. You try to picture it too, thinking of the photograph in his house, the one of him pushing Sarah on the swing. Just a father and his little girl, against the world.

It isn't a very long song. It fades out relatively quickly, and as soon as he strums out the final chord you sit up on the couch and clap ferociously, tears stinging in your eyes all over again.

"I'd usually, uh, play it a couple times for her," he says awkwardly, "'Til she fell asleep."

"It was beautiful," you tell him earnestly, "It was so beautiful, Joel."

He shakes his head with an embarrassed laugh and swivels around to go place his guitar back in its case. He doesn't say anything else, but he doesn't need to. You know how he feels when you spot the tips of ears, tinged pink, warm from your praise.

--

The rest of the day passes in what feels like a warm, luxurious, passionate blur. You go to dinner that evening and order lobster, revel in the way it practically melts in your mouth with sips of champagne and bites of blueberry cheesecake. Joel tells you a little more about his life, tells you everything you want to know about his daughter and his ex. It's not a difficult or uncomfortable conversation like you'd been worried it might be. Instead, you feel closer learning these things about him, feel even more connected to him than you did before as he tells you about Mish and Sarah, their relationship, the arrangement.

"I think I understand it better now," you tell him thoughtfully, "Now that I've actually..." you peer at him shyly, "You know... done it."

He chuckles, "Sex is a powerful thing, it really is. And when you find someone you're compatible with it can be really easy to keep goin' back to 'em. Settle into it, you know? Even if the other parts of your relationship don't work."

"It's like...friends with benefits, right?"

"Exactly. And it really does work for some people, worked for Mish and I for a long time," he shakes his head and reaches across the table to take your hand, "But that's over now, I need you to know that. It's over. You're the only woman in my life and that's how I want it to be. You believe me right?"

His eyes are soft, warm, loving, sincerity practically glowing in his expression.

"I believe you, Joel. Of course I believe you."

You have sex again when you get back to the room, slow and intimate and tender and perfect. You claw at his back as whimpers and cries tear from your mouth, writhing in pleasure beneath him on the bed as he fills you over and over, murmurs filth in your ear and presses down on your clit with his thumb. It's like you've died and gone to heaven, this feeling of permanent bliss and satisfaction, the sensation of being so full and so connected. It's the closest you've ever felt to real inner peace; who would have thought that sitting on a cock instead of in a church pew would be the thing to bring you closer to godliness?

I pray at the church of Joel Miller, you think to yourself as you recover from your fifth orgasm of the day, laying there with fluttering lashes and heaving belly, mind foggy and eyes bleary. Joel is kissing your thighs somewhere below, whispering praises, humming against your skin as he wipes a warm cloth over your twitching pussy.

"I keep thinking about how many sins I've committed in the last twenty four hours," you mumble to him, sleep quickly making its way into your psyche, "And then I remember that I don't care."

His laugh is the last thing you hear before you drift off.

--

Sunday morning is bittersweet. You spend most of it wrapped in Joel's embrace, tracing the freckles and scars on his skin, drifting in and out of consciousness while he peppers kisses all over your face and neck. You have to leave the hotel by noon, get back on the road again and head back home, but the bed is so warm. He's so warm. Everything is warm.

"You never fucked me in the shower," you whisper to him softly, so quiet you wonder if he can even hear you, "Or on the floor."

"I still can," he murmurs, voice husky with sleep, fingers trailing delicately through your hair, "We have a little time."

You nuzzle into his warmth and close your eyes, sighing contentedly, "No," you breathe, "I just want you to hold me."

So he does.

--

The drive home is quieter, but not in a bad way. You're still tired from your escapades and find yourself dozing every so often, vaguely aware of Joel turning down the volume or switching the song to something more chill when he notices you starting to drift. His hand is ever-present on your thigh, stroking the skin over and over like it's just habit at this point. You know you should be forcing yourself to stay awake, to enjoy these last few hours before life goes back to normal, but he really did a number on you.

It's only when you stop at a gas station - the same one where you first saw the playlist you weren't sure you were meant to - that you finally start to feel more awake.

"So tell me about this Angel playlist," you say with a smirk, waving his phone at him as he gets back in the truck, "Can we listen to it?"

A look of surprise crosses his face, but he doesn't seem upset, "How did you even find out about that?"

"I'm in control of the music, remember? It's your spotify."

He groans, cheeks flushing as he pushes on the gas and pulls out of the station, avoiding eye contact. "You were not supposed to see that."

Intrigue floods your brain, fuels your grin, "So it's for me?"

He takes a moment to respond, thumb stroking the wheel as he eyes the road, lip between his teeth. You can tell he's debating whether or not he should answer you, but his silence says everything. Impatient, you practically bounce in your seat, "Can we listen to it? Pretty please?"

He laughs a little breathlessly, shaking his head in disbelief, "Who is this girl sittin' in the front seat of my truck?" He squeezes your thigh, "You're gettin' bold, darlin'. I like it."

"Enough to let me listen to the playlist?"

He sighs, but you know he's not mad, can see the smile tugging at his lips, "...Maybe. At least enough to listen to one song. Will that tide you over?"

"Yes, it most certainly will," you're already tapping Angel, eyes alight with curiosity, "Which song?"

"Northern Sky by Nick Drake, should be the first one there."

You turn to him with a raised brow, "How do you know that's the first song?"

"'Cause I made the damn playlist."

"And you listen to it a lot?"

He laughs again, eyes rolling fondly as he turns his attention back to the road and grins at your words, "You're somethin' else."

You've still got a shit eating grin on your face as the song starts, the soft strumming of guitar filling the small space. Oh, this is pretty. You playfully nod your head to the chords and he rolls his eyes again, strokes your thigh and keeps his attention focused on the road.

And then the lyrics start.

I never felt magic crazy as this I never saw moons, knew the meaning of the sea I never held emotion in the palm of my hand Or felt sweet breezes in the top of a tree But now you're here Brighten my northern sky

Your grin fades almost immediately, realization blooming on your face as the reality of what this playlist actually is begins to dawn on you. You'd thought maybe it was songs he wanted to share with you, songs he wanted to teach you how to play. Just random tunes that he compiled together with you in mind.

No, that's not what this is at all. As the lyrics continue, the melody growing more steady, more beautiful, you realize that these are songs that remind him of you. An entire playlist dedicated to the way he feels.

You stare at the road as the song plays out, not speaking. Your eyes are stinging with tears but you can't bring yourself to say anything, to even look at him. You feel him squeeze your thigh again, a comforting and reassuring little gesture. As if to say, l know, I'm here. As the final chords fade out you frantically reach for his phone and press pause, out of respect for his privacy but also because you're completely unprepared to hear another song like that. You catch him peering at you in your periphery, and you will yourself to look at him with watery eyes.

"Satisfied?" he asks softly, giving you that gorgeous crooked smile.

All you can choke out is a "Yeah."

--

Arriving back at the parking garage hurts. Joel pulls his truck in beside your car, still in the same spot you'd left it, and takes the key out of the ignition with a long sigh. You look over at him, emotion burning in your throat.

"I don't wanna go home," you whisper.

"Oh, babygirl," he murmurs, brow furrowing, "C'mere." He holds his arms open and you clamor over the center console to settle into his lap, burying your face in his neck. He holds you tight and rubs your back, hushes you softly when you start to cry. How is this weekend already over? How are things just supposed to go back to normal now?

"I don't want you to go back there either," he breathes, "If I had it my way you'd be comin' home with me." You feel him press a kiss to the spot just beneath your ear, "But you're strong. You're stronger than you think you are and I know you can get through this. Whatever they have to say, whatever they do, you'll get through it. We'll get through it together."

You don't say anything else, just melt into the warmth of his body and let him hold you, comfort you, until your cries and hiccups fade into even breaths. You pull back slowly and peer at his beautiful face, long to say the words you've been holding back all weekend - but you know there's a reason you've been holding back, know this isn't the right time, not yet.

Instead, you kiss him. It's soft and sweet, a tender goodbye. Temporary, fleeting. You know it's not forever, know you'll probably sneak over tomorrow night to see him again under cover of darkness, find yourself in his bed, get wrapped up in him. But it's a goodbye nonetheless. A goodbye to this - the simplicity, the sense of normalcy and lack of time constraints, the domestic bliss and the thrill of the escape. A goodbye to the bliss.

Driving away from him a few minutes later, watching his truck fade into the distance in your rearview mirror - you think it might be one of the hardest things you've ever had to do.

[tojjist]

𝐄𝐀𝐒𝐘 ↳ r. sukuna

in which: the king of curses left you the moment you announce your pregnancy to him. but after nearly losing you... he might be having a change of heart contains: very slight objectification of reader, reader is a half-curse, mentions of injury and near-death experience, reader is pregnant, slight mention of pregnancy sex, sukuna is really ooc tbh A/N: yall really wanted soft sukuna lmao. i js wanted to write something more in my own style instead of the tumblr style. It's all over the place really, also obv trueform! sukuna. w.c : 1.6k

“Sukuna-sama?” Your voice comes out a breathy whisper, barely audible.

“Do– ugh,” The pink-haired curse sighs. “Don’t call me that. And don’t make me repeat myself.”

You haven’t known Sukuna to be tender. Actually, scratch that. You used to genuinely believe he mistook the adjective for an affront. He probably still does, despite the sheer softness of his actions. His mind is a marvel far beyond your, or anyone else's, comprehension. And if Sukuna hasn’t always been complicated, his sudden switch of behavior recently has rendered  unriddling the complex being that he is even harder.

“What do I call you then?” There’s confusion in your tone; confusion fused with unadulterated innocence. His eyebrows crease further. He loved how naive and ingénue you are. Such a simple, sheepish thing. Easy to lead one, easy to use, easy to hurt. But as of late, he’d come to hate it.

He hates that he hates it. He shouldn’t care.

“I don’t fucking know,” he snaps back. It’s enough to bring you silence, the somber tone he uses coming with a sense of finality. 

Rough callouses are surprisingly gentle against your flesh—callouses that slap, bruise, grope, but never caress. Despite that, he pulls your underwear up your thighs with utter care. If you didn’t know any better, you might even dare call his actions delicate.

“Does it hurt?” He reminisces. Curious digits stroke your lower abdomen and across the swell of your belly, where an ugly scar sits. It decorates your skin with a long, uneven line of dried blood cells.

“It’s not too bad,” You assure, daring to test your luck by bringing your own hand to his hair. It causes the king of curses to pause. His ember eyes continue to stare at your scar, unable to swat your hand away for some reason. The wooden floor beneath him feels too cold. Or he feels too hot. He’s unsure.

In the dimness of the room, there is no light but the flickering glow emitted from the fire, ensconced within a cage of brick—a fireplace, by name. Yet, the warmth that enfolds you does not excrete solely from the flames. It originates from within, a pulsating heat that comes with the beat of your heart as a large palm finds your shoulder, urging you forward with an urgency that seems to echo through the very fibers of your being.

“What about this one?”His intense glare persists, averting your demure gaze. Never before have you witnessed him in such a state, making you wonder whether this demeanor is a consequence of recent events.

“It’s fine, I promise,” Your whispered words cause his gaze to harden even further, his thumb tracing over another, deeper cut nestled in the valley between your breasts. This one could have been fatal. The realization sends a shiver down his spine, unsettling him to his core. Sukuna, the ancient and ruthless curse, has borne witness to countless horrors in his long existence, inflicted unspeakable cruelty upon countless souls, but none have shaken him to his core quite like seeing you teetering on the brink of death. The memory stirs within him an unfamiliar sense of disquiet, a realization that his desires may have consequences far more profound than he ever anticipated.

The brawny curse grunts in response, opting to continue examining the scar. He’s careful to not stretch it as your human flesh would hurt. 

Sukuna’s agenda never included leaving a child within you. It never even crossed his mind. Such muses were not to be entertained, especially not with you.

You. Yeah, you who doesn't try to kill humans simply for the pleasure it brings. You who takes life so lightly, as if you have several souls to spare. You who accepts every word Sukuna says as an indisputable fact, every order executed before he has a chance to reconsider.

You, who has shared your bed with the strongest curse more times than he cares to count, always intrigued him—an enigmatic subject for his manipulations. You, who confided in him the startling revelation that your half-cursed body now nurtures a growing fetus.

At first, Sukuna swore he'd never visit you again, adamant in his belief that he wanted no involvement in your pregnancy, leaving you to navigate the situation alone. Despite his capability to end your life without hesitation, he chose to spare you. Sukuna granted you a reprieve under the condition that he never crosses paths with you or whatever child you carry. He told himself time and time again that you would be a rather boring kill, not worth the effort. But it wasn't about the difficulty of ending your life—it was an excuse. He'd never admit that he doesn't want your blood staining his hands

Sukuna swears he’s not soft, that he doesn’t care for you at all.But the notion of being the one who brings you to your end does not enthrall him in the least.

He doesn’t care for the inferior likes of you, he reminds himself. That’s absurd. It’s laughable. It’s offensive, even. He doesn’t ‘care’, It’s simply curiosity that keeps him around. Curious of what kind of child the one you carry would come out to be. To see if they’d be worthy of being called his kin or not.

“You’re leaving, aren’t you?” Your voice is dulcet, a melody that cuts his train of thought smoothly. Unlike anything he’s ever heard before. There’s a pleading tone, a need so urgent it's almost painful. He finds pleasure in that. Your perpetual longing for him, your unwavering loyalty even after his defeat by sorcerers the first time around—you kept him close like a devoted guardian to a fallen hero, even when you knew is anything but a hero. It's a power unlike any other—staying but not out of fear, it's a choice. A strong belief.

Balancing on his knees between her parted legs, he reaches out, his fingers finding purchase on the edge of the bed. His grip tightens instinctively, fingers slipping beneath the hem of the sheet as he steadies himself. With a controlled effort, he pushes upward, leveraging the bed for support as he rises to his feet

“Why do you ask questions you know the answer to?” He muses, his towering frame looking down at you. The flickering flames of the fire, their orange hues swirling and weaving a macabre tapestry around his countenance, lend him an aura of terror that would instill fear in any who behold him. Yet, unlike others, you find his presence strangely comforting. Despite the aura of terror he exudes, you've grown accustomed to it, finding solace in his formidable presence now more than ever before.

Your only reaction is to chew on the inside of your cheek, careful to not bite the fiber too hard. There’s an ambivalent air to him, remaining motionless as he towers over you. It seems as if he’s looking for something. Anything. He wants a reason to stay, but he can’t seem to find one satisfying enough.

He owes you nothing. But when you look at him like that… He’s never been one to falter at your pleading face, but perhaps he’s changing little by little. He staunchly refuses to acknowledge this change still, for him to do so would be an admission of vulnerability, a humiliation he cannot bear, even to himself. How he yearns for the willpower to end you, to push you away so you never obstruct his way like this again.

The worst part of it all is his acute awareness of why he feels so strongly now. He knows that it’s all him, and not at all you. He can pinpoint the exact moment he regret leaving your side. The memory is seared into his very core. 

He wishes he could forget, to erase the haunting image of you, wounded and bleeding, from his mind. 

It was when he came back a few days after his departure, for reasons he can’t recall, only to be greeted by the sight of a malevolent curse looming over you, hungry and poised to make you its next meal. He shouldn’t have intervened. It's the natural order—a relentless cycle where only the strongest survive, preying upon the weaker. He knows he's no exception. Nor are you.

But seeing you sprawled out on the floor, barely intact, with his child inside of you. 

He gulps at the memory, feeling an overwhelming urge to touch you once more, to make sure you’re not some figment of his imagination. To keep you from harm. You’re so stupid, so goddamn naive. He doesn’t know what to make of you. Other than a fucking headache.

“What is it? What do you want, brat?” He hopes to catch some semblance of his normal attitude. “Get it over with.”

“Please stay,” You plead, fingers gently gripping the open kimono he had thrown on once finished with you. “Please, Sukuna-sama.”

He sighs. You’re so obstinate.

Perhaps it's his lack of understanding that breeds hesitation within him, or perhaps it's his inherently fierce nature. A thing like you deserves to be treated with the utmost delicacy, cherished and nurtured. Sukuna, with his staunch commitment solely to his ideals, can never be the one assuming such a role for you.

“You’re doing things to me, you know?” Sukuna gets down, kneeling between your parted legs again, placing a warm palm in either side of your hips and seizing you within.

Maybe… staying with you tonight wasn’t such a ludicrous notion. He’s the king of curses; he  has all the time in the world to fret the trivial details.

[crimsntwlip]

baby i’m yours | remus lupin.

pairing: bassist!remus x fem!reader

warnings: au, fluff fluff fluff, mentions of y/n, short

a/n: just had rockstar remus stuck in my head 😵‍💫 and was really stuck between drummist!remus or bassist!remus but stuck with bassist!remus :p hope yall love this <3 remus art creds to: @/likeafunerall on ig!! love their art sm !!

| posted; 3/15/24 | masterlist |

you stood at the edge of the crowd, watching as remus and the rest of the marauders took the stage. the dimly lit venue was packed with excited fans, all eagerly awaiting the start of the show. you had seen remus practice countless times in his garage, but seeing him up on stage, under the bright lights, was a whole different experience.

as soon as the music started, you felt your heart swell with pride. remus was an incredible bassist, his fingers flying across the strings with ease. his brown shaggy hair fell messily across his forehead as he bobbed his head to the beat, lost in the music.

but what truly caught your attention was the way his eyes kept flickering in your direction. every time he looked over at you, a wide smile would spread across his face, his eyes twinkling with joy. it was as if he was playing just for you, and the feeling sent a warm wave of happiness through your body.

throughout the set, remus would catch your eye and shoot you a quick wink, making your heart skip a beat. the way he played with such passion and energy made you fall even more in love with him, if that was even possible.

each song that the band played felt like a love letter to you, a secret message hidden in the rhythm and melody. and as the final chords faded away, the crowd erupted into applause, but all you could hear was the pounding of your heart.

your face hurt from smiling so much as the band took their final bow and the show ended, you made your way back stage, where remus was now packing up his gear. he turned to you, a radiant smile on his face as he pulled you into a tight embrace.

"you were amazing," you whispered, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

"i was playing for you," remus replied softly, his eyes filled with unspoken love. “im glad you were here to see me, us play”

“i wouldn’t miss a single show” you replied, a cheeky smile playing against your lips. as you leaned in to kiss him again, the rest of the band members gathered around, congratulating each other on a successful show. james clapped remus on the back, "brilliant as always, mate."

sirius smirked, "clearly you were playing for someone special tonight." peter chimed in, "yeah, we all saw the way you were looking at y/n."

remus blushed slightly, but his smile never faltered. "well, she has always been my biggest fan."

you chuckled, "your biggest fan and your biggest admirer," you teased, feeling a surge of affection for the talented bassist in front of you.

"i'm a lucky man then," remus replied, pulling you by your waist for another hug. the rest of the band laughed and continued to tease remus about his performance, but he just grinned and held onto you, as if he never wanted to let go.

taglist: @chgrch <3

[mopopshop]

Ok so for juju what abt her going to (fem) reader dorm/apartment after practice and being all cuddly and needy cause she’s really tired and wants attention? I just need more juju fics bro 😭😭🙏🏾

Soft (Juju Watkins x Reader)

i like writing juju stuff so send requests for it yall😟🙌🏾

———

You’re just finishing up some studying when you hear a gentle knock on your dorm room door. Glancing at the clock, you realize it’s later than you thought—practice must have just ended. You smile, knowing exactly who it is.

Opening the door, you’re met with the sight of Juju, your girlfriend. Her usually vibrant energy replaced with a weary but affectionate smile. She looks exhausted, her hair slightly damp from a post-practice shower, her eyes a little droopier than normal.

“Hey, baby” she murmurs, stepping inside and wrapping her arms around your waist immediately. The warmth of her embrace melts away any remnants of stress from earlier. “I missed you.”

You chuckle softly, leading her to the bed. “You were only gone for a few hours, J.”

“Felt like fucking forever,” she mumbles, nuzzling into your neck as you both collapse onto the soft mattress. You run your fingers through her braids, feeling her relax against you.

She shifts, draping herself across your lap, her head resting on your shoulder. “I’m so tired,” she whispers, her voice almost a whine. “Practice was brutal.”

You press a kiss to her forehead, your heart swelling with affection. “I can see that. Just stay in my lap for a while, yeah?”

She nods, her eyes fluttering shut. “That sounds perfect.”

You continue to stroke her hair, the room falling into a comfortable silence. Juju’s breathing evens out, and you can feel her muscles gradually unwind. Her neediness is endearing, and you’re more than happy to give her the attention she craves.

“Thank you,” she whispers after a few minutes, her voice soft and sleepy.

“For what?” you ask, gently.

“Just because, I love you .”

You laugh. “Aw, you’re welcome babe. I love you”

She snuggles closer, her arms wrapping around you more securely. It’s clear that her exhaustion is making her clingier by the second.

As the minutes tick by, you both settle into a peaceful rhythm. Juju’s fingers trace lazy patterns on your thigh, and you can feel her body slowly but surely relaxing into yours. It’s these quiet moments that you cherish the most, where words aren’t necessary, and the simple presence of each other is enough.

“Fuck my back hurts,” Juju blurts out, flinching and reaching for her back, breaking the silence. “Think I tweaked it last practice, been bothering me since” she giggles.

You gape at that news. “Why didn’t you tell me earlier, you should be sleeping, getting better and— and—“

Juju laughs harder at your panic and sits up, criss-cross, in front of you. Placing her hands on your thighs. 

“Baby.. I’m fine, chill” she grins, rubbing your legs. 

You can’t help but smile back, feeling a warmth spread through your chest. “Still, you need to take care of yourself, J. You work so hard.”

She sighs, her eyes closing once more as she nestles her head against your shoulder. “I know. But it’s worth it when I get to come home to you.”

Your heart flutters at her words, and you lean down to kiss the top of her head. The two of you lay there for what feels like hours, wrapped up in each other’s warmth. You talk about everything and nothing as the outside world fades away, leaving just the two of you in your little bubble of peace.

At some point, Juju’s stomach growls, and she looks up at you with a sheepish grin. “Man, I forgot to eat after practice.”

You laugh softly, giving her a gentle squeeze. “Wanna order something?”

She nods as she buries her head back into your neck, so you grab your phone and open the doordash app. 

“Chic-Fil-A?” You ask and she nods once again into your neck.

The food arrives a little while later and you both sit up on your bed eating. 

“You spoil me, you know that?” she says, her eyes twinkling with affection.

You shrug playfully, handing over her food. “Just taking care of my girl.”

She takes the plate with a grateful smile, and the two of you sit in comfortable silence, sharing a simple meal together. It’s nothing fancy, but it’s perfect in its own way.

After eating, you both clean up, changing into some pajamas, and lay back on the bed, settling in for the night. Juju cuddles up to you once more, her head resting on your chest as she lets out a content sigh.

“Thank you for tonight, baby” she whispers, her voice filled with gratitude. “I really needed this.”

“You’re welcome J,” you reply softly, running your fingers through her braids. “I’m always here for you.”

———

[notiddygothgf]

11. Conflict of Interest

★ pairings: aki hayakawa x fem reader

★ ❝ You don't deserve this. ❞ ❝ You know I love you, troublemaker. ❞

★ c.w.: n/a. (more content warnings and tags)

★ a/n: Hi my darlingssss!!! SO as i said I've reached the end of prewritten chapters so updates will be coming a little slower. I'm full time at uni and I've been absolutely SWAMPED with exams this past week. Chem is the worst iykyk. Anyway!!! to make up for the delay (and future delays) i wanted to spoil yall with a lil long chapter. I HOPE YOU LOVE IT!!! i love YOU!! comment comment comment away i literally love reading them. give me smth to look forward too tee hee.

★ w.c: .9.5k

shameless ; chapter index

YOUR HEART DROPPED through your chest, the world around you slowing to a crawl as his words echoed in your mind. Tokyo. He’s coming here.

“What?” you breathed, barely managing the word, your throat tightening as reality hit you all at once.

“ Yeah ,” he continued, sounding almost excited, as if this was the best news in the world. “ My supervisor said they could really use the backup in Tokyo. I guess the team’s been stretched thin over there, so they’re sending me out .”

Your stomach lurched, twisting into a tight knot. Tokyo? Here? Now? It was as if the universe was playing a cruel joke on you.

“That’s… great,” you forced out, your voice shaky, trying desperately to mask the panic swelling inside. “Really.”

Aki’s eyes met yours from across the balcony, his gaze steady, calm. He couldn’t hear what was being said, but he watched you with a quiet curiosity, completely unaware of the storm brewing inside you. You could feel your face heating up under his gaze, the weight of everything pressing down on your shoulders. How am I going to hide this from him?

“How long will you be here?” you asked, feigning a casual tone, even though your hands were shaking, white-knuckled around the phone.

“ Not sure, ” he answered, still in that same oblivious tone. “I guess as long as you’re in Tokyo, I’ll be stationed there. My supervisor thinks it’ll be good for us to be close by for a while. ”

Your chest tightened further, breath hitching as you tried to process what he was saying. I’m screwed. This is it. I’m completely, utterly screwed.

“They’re booking me a suite. I asked to stay with you, and they said it was fine, ” He added.

“That’s... that’s amazing,” you said, forcing a hollow excitement into your voice. Your lips trembled into a smile that didn’t reach your eyes. “Wow, it’s going to be…” You swallowed. “Nice.”

The words were like acid on your tongue.

He chuckled, clearly pleased with himself. “Yeah, I thought you’d like that. We’ll finally be able to catch up on all the time we missed.”

“Yeah, finally,” you repeated quietly, feeling a wave of nausea roll through you. Your heart was pounding in your ears, so loud that you could barely hear his voice anymore. You were nodding along, saying whatever words you could muster, but your thoughts were spiraling. What the hell am I going to do?

“Well, I’ve got to finish up some paperwork before the move, but I’ll be there soon. Tonight, actually.”

You swallowed hard. That was no time at all. How am I supposed to prepare for this? Your brain was screaming, but outwardly, you nodded, forcing a tight smile he couldn’t see.

“That sounds... perfect,” you lied. “Really, I’m looking forward to it.”

“Alright, I’ll call you when I’ve got the final details. Love you.”

You opened your mouth, but the words stuck in your throat. For a split second, you hesitated, your eyes flickering to Aki, who had leaned back in the chair, watching you with a soft, curious gaze. The weight of your husband’s voice on the other end of the line crushed down on you.

“Love you too ,” you said, your voice barely more than a whisper before quickly hanging up.

The silence that followed was deafening. You stared at the phone in your hand, the cold, empty feeling creeping into your chest.

The cigarette, long forgotten, had burned down to a stub, the last ember smoldering weakly. You pressed it out in the ashtray, your fingers trembling, your breath coming in shallow, uneven bursts.

You gripped the edge of the balcony railing, trying to steady yourself, but the panic had already taken hold. Your heart raced, the world closing in around you as you fought to keep yourself from spiraling.

He’s coming. He’s really coming to Tokyo. What the hell am I going to do now?

Aki’s quiet presence was still there, grounding, but it didn’t stop the thoughts racing through your mind. You couldn’t let him see. Couldn’t let him know how badly this was shaking you. You were supposed to be fine. Everything was supposed to be fine.

But nothing was fine anymore.

You stared out over the city skyline, your chest rising and falling rapidly as you fought to regain control. But it was slipping. It was all slipping through your fingers, and for the first time in a long while, you felt powerless.

The panic was unbearable. Your chest felt like it was caving in, breath coming in short, sharp bursts as the reality of it settled over you. You had to get out—move, escape before the walls closed in completely. You pushed yourself off the balcony, your mind racing, limbs trembling.

Aki watched you stand abruptly, his brow furrowing as you moved quickly toward the door, your steps frantic, unsteady.

“Hey, where are you going?” he asked, his voice gentle but confused, rising from the chair to follow you. He reached out, catching your arm just as your hand grasped the door handle. “You okay?”

You froze under his touch, your heart hammering in your chest as his warmth anchored you. The panic swelled even more, your thoughts a blur. You could feel your throat tightening, the words struggling to come out. He’s coming. It was like a mantra, replaying over and over in your mind, suffocating you.

“He’s coming,” you choked out, your voice small and broken. You turned to face Aki, your eyes wide, brimming with tears that threatened to spill over. “My husband. He’s coming to Tokyo.”

Aki’s grip on your arm tightened slightly, concern clouding his face as he stepped closer. “What are you talking about?”

“It’s over.” The words came out on a sob, the reality of it crashing down on you. “He’s coming here, and it’s all over. He’s gonna ruin everything.”

The tears fell freely now, your body trembling under the weight of it all. Aki’s expression shifted from concern to something deeper, something protective. He pulled you gently into his arms, holding you close, his warmth a stark contrast to the cold fear clawing at your insides.

“What do you mean ‘it’s over’? What’s going on? Talk to me.”

You tried to catch your breath, tried to form words, but the memories hit you hard and fast. Every bruise, every cruel word, every moment in that house—it was suffocating you now. You clung to Aki, your fingers digging into his shirt as if he were the only thing keeping you from falling apart completely.

“He’ll find out,” you whispered, your voice trembling. “He’s going to find out about us. About me.”

Aki’s hand gently stroked your back, his voice low and soothing. “Hey, calm down. Why are you so upset? What’s wrong?”

You shook your head, pulling back slightly to meet his eyes, tears blurring your vision. “You don’t understand. You don’t know him.”

Aki frowned, his thumb brushing away a tear that trailed down your cheek. “Then tell me. Help me understand.”

The words caught in your throat, but something about the way he looked at you—steady, unwavering—made you feel safe. You swallowed hard and the dam inside you broke.

“My husband... he’s not... he’s…” you began, your voice shaking, the words tumbling out faster now. “He’s hurt me. For years. He’s been hurting me.”

Aki’s expression darkened, his body tensing, but he stayed quiet, giving you space to speak. His arms were still wrapped around you, grounding you.

“When we first got married, it wasn’t like this. He wasn’t like this. It started small—just words. He’d get angry over the smallest things, but then it got worse. He’d talk down to me, degrade me, then he hit me. At first, it was my fault. I made myself believe that. I thought if I just tried harder, if I didn’t mess up, maybe he’d stop. But he never did. He kept hitting me, and I’m scared that– that he’ll hurt me.”

Your voice cracked, the memories overwhelming, but you kept going, needing to let it out. “And now he’s coming here. He’ll see how happy I am, and he’ll take it all away. He always finds a way to make me pay.”

Aki’s jaw clenched, his hands trembling slightly as he held you. His voice was steady, “I would never let him do that.”

You wanted to believe him, wanted so desperately to let go of the fear that had gripped you for so long. But your husband had always found you. Always pulled you back. You weren’t free of him—not yet.

“But we can’t… see each other anymore,” you whispered, your voice breaking. “Not while he’s here. He’ll know, Aki. He’ll figure it out, and I can’t let… I just can’t.”

Aki’s eyes flashed with something like heartbreak, his grip on you tightening as if refusing to let you go. “We can figure something out. See each other in secret, maybe.”

You shook your head, tears streaming down your face. “We can’t. He’ll watch me, and if he finds out about us, he’ll hurt you. He’ll hurt both of us.”

Aki’s hand came up to cup your cheek, his thumb brushing away your tears as he leaned in, his forehead resting against yours. “I don’t care what he does to me. I don’t want him to take you away.”

But you could see the pain in his eyes, the uncertainty. You felt your own heart breaking, the weight of it all pressing down on you. You shook your head again, gently pulling away from his touch.

“I can’t take that risk.”

Aki’s breath hitched, his face falling. For a long, agonizing moment, he said nothing, just stared at you like he was trying to find the right words, trying to make you stay. But he knew. Deep down, he knew you were right.

“You want to stop seeing me, then?” he asked quietly, his voice barely more than a whisper. “We just stop? After everything? After the conversation we had less than 12 hours ago?”

You swallowed hard, the lump in your throat making it difficult to speak. “For now,” you managed, though the words felt like they were ripping you apart. “It’s the only way I can keep you safe. Depending on how long he stays, I’m sure we can find a way to sneak around, but for now…”

Aki looked away, blinking rapidly as if he was fighting back his own tears. He nodded slowly, his shoulders sagging as the reality of it sunk in.

“I understand,” he murmured, his voice tight with the pain of it. “I don’t like it, but I understand. I’ll stay away if it means you’re safe.”

It felt like your heart was shattering. You wanted to tell him you could find a way, that it didn’t have to be like this. But you knew better. You had to keep him safe. You had to protect him, even if it meant breaking both of your hearts in the process. Above all else, you didn’t want to give your husband a reason to put his hands on you again.

Damn him. He stole everything from you. Your freedom, your happiness, your youth, and now, this.

Aki opened his arms again, pulling you into a tight embrace, holding you like it was the last time. You buried your face in his chest, the sobs returning, harder now, your entire body trembling against him. His hands stroked your back, soothing, but it wasn’t enough to calm the storm raging inside you.

“But, just so you know,” He broke the silence, “You can still call me whenever you need me, okay? You have my number. Use it. I’ll be there faster than you can spell my name.”

Don’t tell me that, you thought. I’ll call you every single day that we’re apart.

You couldn’t breathe. Your chest was so tight, the weight of the decision crushing you. You had to protect yourself, had to let him go, but everything in you screamed that this was wrong. That you shouldn’t be doing this. 

If this was the right thing—if this was truly to give Aki peace—then why did it feel so wrong? Why did it feel like your heart was being ripped out of your chest?

“I don’t want to say goodbye,” You sobbed, “You don’t deserve this.”

You clung to him, your sobs turning to gasps, your breath coming in ragged, desperate bursts. You couldn’t breathe. It hurt too much. But you didn’t let go. Neither of you did.

Because even though you both knew this was the end, neither of you was ready to say goodbye.

“You know I love you, troublemaker,” He cooed softly, kissing the top of your head.

This time, as the words left your lips, you felt yourself die a little, “I love you more.”

No stranger to the Tokyo train station, finding your husband’s train did not prove to be a difficult task. It rolled in at exactly 5:56 PM. Four minutes early. Your heart sank through your gut. Briefly, as the train doors slid open, you messed with your appearance – like you had done the whole time Aki had driven you up there in the passenger seat mirror, like he would be able to see the love bites you knew weren’t there, see remnants of your night with Aki all over your skin and face. 

Then, holding a brown suitcase you remembered from your honeymoon, your husband finally stepped off of the train. His brown hair looked like it was freshly done, neatly trimmed around his ears and face. His eyes went wide the moment he saw you. 

Had his nose always looked so… big? 

“Tanimoto!” You called him, waving your arms around.

You swallowed hard, forcing a smile as you waved a little more frantically than you intended. Tanimoto beamed, but something about it felt off to you. The lopsided grin, which had once sent flutters through your chest, now seemed… worn. The lines around his mouth stretched awkwardly, and the dull sheen in his eyes made your stomach turn.

As he approached, dragging the familiar brown suitcase along the platform, you felt a pang of regret—of guilt—and something else you couldn’t quite place. His footsteps were slightly heavier than you remembered, his posture just a touch more hunched. It was like seeing him with new eyes, like you'd forgotten these details about him and were seeing them for the first time. 

Your mind flashed back to Aki’s car, to the stolen glances in the rearview mirror, to the easy, careless laughter.

"Hey!" Tanimoto’s voice snapped you back to the moment. His arms reached out, and before you could stop yourself, you were in his embrace. You stiffened as his lips pressed a quick kiss on the top of your head, his breath warm against your scalp. It was a gesture that should’ve made you feel safe, but it didn’t. Instead, it made your skin itch.

“You got here early,” you said, stepping back as casually as possible. The scent of his cologne—familiar yet distant—lingered in the air between you. His brown eyes searched your face, but you avoided meeting them for too long, afraid of what he might see.

“I did,” he chuckled, “but looks like you were ready for me, huh?”

You forced another smile. “Of course.”

He took your hand, his fingers wrapping around yours with a tenderness that once made your heart race. Now, it just felt like a weight. He said something. You weren’t really listening. Instead, you found yourself hyper-focused on little things: the way his coat hung awkwardly off his frame, how his nose suddenly seemed far too large for his face. 

Had he… always been like this? Or had you just... forgotten?

He squeezed your hand, and your mind flashed back to the feel of Aki’s hands, rougher, warmer, and somehow more real.

Tanimoto tugged you closer, placing a soft kiss on your forehead. "It's good to be back," he murmured, his lips lingering for a moment longer than you expected. 

“Yeah,” you said, barely above a whisper. “Let’s call the cab.”

It had been a week since you last saw Aki, but it felt like a lifetime. His absence gnawed at you, leaving you restless and hollow, like a piece of you had gone missing. 

You hadn't expected to miss him like this—hadn’t expected the nights to feel so long or the mornings so cold. Your mind kept drifting back to him, replaying every moment of that night over and over until it was almost too much to bear.

Who knew you would be craving him again like some sort of addict after only a week apart? Briefly, you couldn’t help but wonder if he felt the same way.

Now, sitting in a dimly lit restaurant, waiting for someone who wasn’t him, your fingers drummed anxiously on the table. The room was warm, cozy even, with soft candlelight flickering on polished wood and the low hum of conversations around you. The clinking of glasses and silverware provided a backdrop that should’ve been soothing, but instead, it only made your anxiety worse. 

You checked your phone for the fifth time, willing time to move faster. He wouldn’t text. You told him not to. You knew that. But still.

"Sorry I’m late," A feminine voice said, surprisingly soft. Himeno adjusted her coat, smoothing it down, though her gaze barely met yours.

Across from you, she sat down with a sigh, finally breaking the tension that had been swirling in your chest. Her long, dark hair was a little longer than it had been the last time you saw her. Her eyes were tired but still held that edge – well, eye.

You offered a tight smile, feeling the awkwardness settle back between you like an old habit. "Thanks for coming out tonight, Himeno, I appreciate it."

"No, it’s fine," she replied with a sigh, finally lifting her gaze to meet yours. There was something different in it—less accusatory, more resigned. "I’ve been doing a lot of thinking about you."

"About?" you asked, though the answer was painfully obvious.

"And you-know-who," she said, her lips pressed into a thin line. Her nails tapped on the table as she spoke. "I shouldn’t have acted so mean. I was upset and catty, and I didn’t realize how badly I had taken the whole thing until I saw how upset he was about it."

Your heart skipped. "Upset?"

Himeno exhaled sharply, shaking her head as if still processing it all. "He asked me why you and I stopped talking. I told him I was upset that the two of you were sneaking around. He said I was acting like a spoiled child, that I had no right to be mad."

You couldn’t help it—a laugh escaped you, a short, bitter sound. "That sounds like him. I don’t think—"

The waiter arrived, momentarily cutting the conversation short. You ordered a bottle of Cabernet Sauvignon and two glasses – with which he returned after only a moment. As soon as he left, the air grew thick again.

Himeno poured the wine with practiced ease, the rich red liquid swirling as it filled your glasses. "No, he’s right," she said, handing you a glass before picking up her own. "I have no right to be upset about who he’s sleeping with."

Your throat tightened, and your pulse quickened. You grasped the glass, but it felt like lead in your hand. "We didn’t…"

Himeno’s laugh was dry. She raised an eyebrow and gave you a look that made you squirm. "You don’t have to lie to me," she said, her voice lower, calmer than you expected. "I didn’t hear anything solid—just petty rumors—but I can see it. His whole demeanor is different now. He cares about you, married or not. Something happened between you two, didn’t it?"

You felt the weight of her words pressing down on you, and the guilt you’d been pushing down for days rose to the surface. You stared at the wine swirling in your glass, then finally let out a long, tired sigh. “You can’t tell anyone.” 

You haven’t told your husband yet?” Himeno asked, taking a long sip of her wine. The question hung heavy in the air between you, the weight of everything unsaid pressing down.

You shook your head, the words spilling out before you could stop them. “He’s a tricky situation for me. He’s abusive, a real piece of shit, and I just… I was too scared to divorce him because I knew it would be bad.” You had sighed, rubbing your hands together under the table. “I guess what I’m trying to say is that I’m scared of him.”

Himeno’s expression had softened. Her face, usually sharp and guarded, had seemed to lose some of its edge as she had looked at you, really looked at you. The tension between you had shifted, not completely gone but different, more subdued.

“And Aki had just…” you hesitated, feeling your chest tighten, “He’s been so kind to me from the start. He pursued me with a passion I hadn’t even known existed. He had made me feel things I hadn’t felt in years.” You had paused, trying to collect your thoughts, but it had all spilled out too fast. “I was vulnerable, and I wanted to do something for myself for once. But it wasn’t… a one-time thing.”

Himeno’s eye had widened slightly, her glass hovering mid-air – stuck somewhere between her hand and her mouth.

“It would have been easier to tell him if it had been just a stupid one-night stand,” You continued, your voice barely above a whisper. “But it hadn’t been. I kept hanging around him, and I felt like I couldn’t stay away. Before I knew it, I felt something change.” 

You had stopped for a moment, needing a breath. “And, Himeno, I felt horrible for what I had done that night, you have to understand. It really wasn’t my intention, but… he was persistent . And I realized I wanted something more from him. So we kept seeing each other, in secret, and now—” Your voice cracked, and you quickly swallowed the lump in your throat. “Now, I don’t know why, but I feel like I would die without him. He’s the first good thing that has come into my life in years.”

Himeno blinked, her mouth slightly open in shock, her wine glass still in hand. The pink flush of alcohol—or maybe embarrassment—had crept across her cheeks.

“But,” you had added quickly, trying to regain some control of the conversation, “You’ll be happy to know we've never been official. I told him we couldn’t see each other until my husband left Tokyo. I don’t want to lose him and a friend. You were right, Himeno. I shouldn’t have dragged Aki into my crazy, fucked-up marriage. In fact, I wish I could pretend none of this ever happened.”

You trailed off, staring into the half-empty wine glass in front of you, feeling the exhaustion settle deep into your bones. It had felt like confessing everything should have made you lighter, but instead, it had just made you feel… heavy.

Himeno had still been staring at you, frozen, her wide eye fixed on your face. “Oh my god,” She whispered, her voice barely audible over the low murmur of the restaurant. Her cheeks were flushed, her lips parted in shock. “You’re in love with him.”

There had been a pause, and you fumbled for the right words, the right way to explain this away. “Yeah, I mean, I was—I am—but it’s over now! I told him we had to stop seeing each other. It’s better that he’s with someone like you who can actually be there for him. I’m going to go back to Kyoto, divorce my husband, and then—therapy, probably. And then I’ll think about—”

“He’s hot, sure, but I don’t want him anymore. Besides, it won’t make a difference,” Himeno cut you off, her voice flat. “You might think you’d be able to move on, but Aki won’t. I can’t just steal him back from you.”

“Why not?” you asked, a little too quickly. “That’s what I did.”

Himeno shook her head, a dry laugh escaping her. “He’s got a big heart. It’s different. I was only upset because I didn’t know your intentions with him, at first. I thought you were going to take advantage of him,” She said, her voice softening. “But you love him. And I think he loves you, too. He was never mine to begin with, and he sure as hell won’t be mine now that he’s gotten a taste of you. That’s something I had to come to terms with a while ago.” Her lips had curled into a small smile. “As far as I’m concerned, that’s your man. He’s not mine to keep – he’s been yours since the moment you got off that damn train. You won, fair and square.”

You shook your head, the weight of her words pressing on your chest. “It’s not a competition, Himeno.”

“It’s not, you’re right.” She shrugged, her voice casual, but her gaze was kind and imploring, almost a little bittersweet – as if she couldn’t help but feel the slightest pang of sadness that he hadn’t been with her instead. “That kid is fucking crazy about you. He’s become insufferable ever since you left him. You can’t just walk away from it like that.”

“It’s not like I wanted to.” The words had come out as a sigh, heavy and tired. “I wish there could be some sort of happy ending for us, I really do. But I know my husband. At least for now, I have to stay away from him. It would be good for both of us.”

“God, you really are a mess.” Himeno leaned back in her chair, running a hand through her hair. “Hopeless idiots, the both of you. Sounds like a whole bunch of mukka-lukka about shit that doesn’t even really matter.” She rolled her eyes, but there had been something affectionate in her tone, like she had resigned herself to the chaos of it all.

“It matters—” you had started, but Himeno cut you off before you could finish.

“No, it doesn’t,” she had said firmly, leaning in slightly. “What matters is that you two have something special. You don’t want to walk away from it, do you?”

You hesitated, fingers curling around the stem of your wine glass. “No, not really, but—”

“There is no but ,” Himeno interrupted, her voice sharp but not unkind. “If you’re gonna steal my handsome partner away from me, you better ride that train to the last stop. You make each other happy. It’ll work itself out.”

You chewed on her words, the truth of them settling in your gut like a slow burn. “I guess you’re right. After everything’s said and done, though, I’m not really sure he’ll be there for me to come back to.”

“He will,” Himeno sighed, leaning back in her chair with an exasperated look. “That’s the issue. Stop being stupid and go get your man. I’m sick of watching him mope around like a sad little child.”

You huffed, conflicted. “I don’t know. Should I? It doesn’t feel right.”

Himeno raised an eyebrow. “You said you’re divorcing him anyway, right?”

“Yeah, but I don’t—” You took a deep breath, the weight of it all pressing down on you. “I don’t want him to hurt me or Aki.”

“Then don’t let him find out,” Himeno snapped, her voice sharp like a whip. “Aki’s strong enough to protect the both of you, anyway.”

“What if it’s out of my control?” you asked, feeling the panic rise in your throat. “People talk.”

“It’s all just background noise,” Himeno sighed, leaning back in her chair, the dim light catching the faint smirk tugging at the corner of her lips. “For the record, I never said anything to anyone. I know you’re thinking it.”

You bit back your instinctive retort, swallowing hard. “I don’t—” You paused, eyes narrowing, your tone softer now. “I don’t know why you didn’t.”

“Why would I want to shatter his image?” she replied, her voice calm, though there had been something sad lurking beneath her casual tone. “I care about him, you know. You’re an extension of him, now. You can’t keep living in fear of your husband. You’re not powerless. It’s the twentieth century.”

The weight of those words settled in your chest, heavier than you had expected. You didn’t know what to say, the relief tinged with the sharp edge of guilt. “He’d kill me if he found out through someone else.”

Himeno raised an eyebrow, her lips curling into a knowing smile. “He doesn’t have to know. For now,” she said, her voice laced with mischief. A little firmer, she offered, “Just because your husband’s in Tokyo, doesn’t mean you can’t talk to the kid. You can behave, can’t you? Just for a while? Just long enough to see him?”

The thought of seeing Akitwisted something deep inside of you, and you weren’t able to help but pout, your voice low. “I do wanna see him, just… not to talk.”

Himeno’s laugh had been sudden and bright, cutting through the heaviness in the air – a sound you didn’t realize you had missed until now. “Naughty girl! God, I missed you,” she teased, slapping your arm lightly, her grin wide and mischievous. Then, her demeanor had shifted, softened. She had reached across the table, extending her hand toward you. “Start over? You and me? What do you say?”

For a moment, you just stared at her, mind spinning, trying to process what she was offering. The tension that had sat between the two of you for so long had felt like it was starting to unravel. You blinked, your lips parting in surprise.

“I could really use a girlfriend,” Himeno added, her smile tinged with something a little more vulnerable now. “It’s hard to talk to other women my age. Most of ‘em don’t live that long..”

Her words hit you harder than you’d expected, a strange warmth spreading through your chest. The walls you’d both built had started to crumble, and for the first time, you felt the potential for something more than this guarded, awkward rivalry. Something like friendship. Maybe even understanding.

A small smile tugged at your lips as you nodded. “Okay, yeah… let’s start over.”

Her hand was warm when you shook on it, and when your glasses clinked together in a quiet toast, it felt like a truce—fragile, but real.

For a beat, there had been peace. 

But then, Himeno grinned, that playful spark dancing in her eyes. She took a slow sip of her wine, setting the glass down deliberately before leaning forward with that all-too-familiar wicked grin.

“So,” She began, her voice dripping with curiosity, “Tell me, as your friend and not as Aki’s partner. How’s the sex?”

You had choked, sputtering on your wine. “ Himeno. ”

“What? I wanna know!” Himeno leaned forward with a whine, her eye practically sparkling with curiosity. “Now that I’m not interested in experiencing it for myself, I need all the juicy details.”

You rolled your eyes, but the smirk that had played at your lips had betrayed you. Despite the absurdity of the conversation, it had felt like a release, an unburdening of something you’d kept bottled up for far too long. With a cheeky tilt of your head, you decided to indulge her for a while, “Absolutely divine .”

“Groundbreaking?” Himeno’s eyebrow arched, her grin widening as she leaned closer, elbows resting on the table.

“ Bed -breaking,” You shot back without hesitation, a soft laugh escaping your lips. It felt good—better than you’d expected—to finally share this with someone, to let the secret of your affair slip into the open, even if only between the two of you. You felt the weight lifting from your chest as the words spilled out. “He’s a fiend. Totally different from that buttoned-up, serious Captain you see at work. He’s so… passionate and considerate. Like, ridiculously attentive. And… insatiable.”

Himeno’s eyes flashed with interest, her lips curling into an amused smile. “But is he good , though?” Her voice lowered conspiratorially, as if you were two schoolgirls gossiping about a secret crush.

You couldn’t help the flush that crept up your neck. The memories had hit you hard—the way Aki had touched you, the way his breath had felt against your skin, his intensity, his need for you. You let out a deep, satisfied sigh, almost involuntarily. 

" Yes ," you had whispered, your voice dipping low as the heat of the memory overtook you. " God,yes." 

Your eyes practically shut for a moment as the flashbacks played out in your mind. The ghost of his touch lingered on your skin, sliding up your thighs, pressing a kiss to your heat – His hands, his lips, the way his eyes fluttered shut when he slid inside of you for the first time, like it took everything he had to hold on, like you were the only woman in the entire world.

God, you missed him.

You dropped your voice, as if sharing a precious secret. “Can’t get enough of it, really.”

Himeno’s grin spread wide across her face, and her laughter came easily, as if the revelation had been exactly what she’d expected. "So he’s got you dick-whipped , huh?" She hummed, the words rolling off her tongue with wicked delight.

"For lack of a better word… yes," You admitted, but you couldn’t stop the smile pulling at your lips. The embarrassment had risen in your chest, but so had the thrill of confessing it aloud for the first time. 

Himeno’s playful teasing had felt like a release, like she was giving you permission to laugh at the absurdity of your situation.

Himeno, still grinning, raised an eyebrow knowingly. "Denji said he saw you limp into the kitchen the other day."

Your eyes widened, a mixture of horror and exasperation flooding your face. "Did he?" You groaned, pressing your fingers to your temples as if you could will away the embarrassment. "Aki made him swear he wouldn’t tell anyone."

Himeno snickered, clearly relishing the story. "I’m not just anyone ." Her tone had been smug, and she had gestured with her hands, mimicking a measurement as if to add insult to injury, spreading her two pointer fingers further apart with each word. "And between me and you, girl – Congratulations ."

Your face burned, and you buried it in your hands, trying to suppress the laughter bubbling up inside you. "Oh my God ," you muttered through your fingers, voice muffled but laced with laughter. “Quiet down before someone overhears!"

Back at the hotel, you were just about ready to call it a night. Donning a waffle-print robe, you watched a pay-per-view on the television screen. Your husband was rummaging around the hotel room the two of you had been sharing for the past week. 

He flopped down onto the bed next to you

Without warning, he turned off the TV and slid closer, straddling you. His lips pressed gently against your neck, his kisses tender but insistent. 

“Baby, stop,” you laughed, trying to push him away with a half-hearted shove.

He didn’t relent, his lips trailing from your neck to your ear. You tried again, “Stop it, seriously.”

But he was persistent, his kisses becoming more insistent. You shifted under him, more firmly this time. “No, seriously—stop it. I’m not in the mood.”

He pulled back slightly, a sigh escaping his lips as he rolled off you, laying down beside you with a resigned thud. “You’re never in the mood. I thought after being apart, you’d want to make up for lost time.”

You were silent for a moment, trying to gather your thoughts. “I’m just tired,” you finally said, rubbing your eyes. “It’s been a long day. Himeno and I had a lot to drink. I’d really rather just go to sleep. Can we talk about this tomorrow?”

He turned his head, looking at you with a mixture of frustration and hurt. “It was tomorrow yesterday, and the day before that, and every night for the past week,” he retorted.

His words stung, hitting closer to home than you wanted to admit. You knew he was right, but you didn’t want to confront it. “I said I was sorry,” he continued, his voice a mix of anger and desperation. “What, do you want me to beg?”

You scoffed, feeling the guilt mix with your exhaustion. “What? No, I just… I’m not mad at you. I’m just tired. Can’t we just let it be for tonight?”

He stared at you, his expression a mixture of hurt and resignation. “You’re punishing me for what happened before you left, aren’t you?”

You didn’t say anything, your silence a tacit admission. The room was heavy with unspoken words and unresolved issues.

He sighed deeply, rolling onto his back and staring up at the ceiling. “I don’t know how to fix this if you keep shutting me out.”

You felt a pang of regret. “It’s not about shutting you out,” you murmured. “I just need some rest. Tomorrow, I promise. We can talk then.”

He didn’t respond, the silence between you thick with tension. You reached over, resting a hand on his arm, but the gesture felt too little, too late. Quickly, you withdrew your hand.

“I said I was sorry,” he said, his voice edged with frustration. “What, do you want me to beg?”

You scoffed, already pissed the hell off about the entire conversation so far. “What? No, I just… I’m not mad at you. I’m just tired. It had been a long day. Himeno and I had drunk more than we probably should have. I’d really rather just go to sleep. Can we talk about this tomorrow?”

He rolled his eyes, his irritation palpable. “It was tomorrow yesterday, and the day before that, and every night for the past week.”

You tried to explain, though your voice lacked the conviction you wished it had. “I just haven’t been feeling good.”

Truthfully, you couldn’t imagine a worse idea. The thought of another man’s touch filled you with revulsion. You felt a peculiar sense of loyalty to Aki, as though the mere notion of being with anyone else was a betrayal of your own beliefs. It was as if Aki had imprinted himself on you in such a way that being with another man seemed not just unappealing, but downright wrong .

He had huffed, settling heavily into the bed. “Sure,” he sighed. “Well, then let’s sleep.”

He’s giving up that easily? You furrowed your brows. “What?”

“That’s what you wanted, right?” Ge said, his voice dripping with sarcasm. “Sorry for thinking my wife missed me. Goodnight.”

You had tossed the blankets aside, your anger bubbling over as you rolled out of the bed. “Oh, don’t fucking act like that.”

“You’re one to talk – you’ve been acting distant ever since you left for Tokyo. It’s like you’re not even happy to see me .”

Feeling trapped and overwhelmed, you had grabbed a robe and slipped on your outdoor slippers, reaching for the hotel room key. The cool metal felt oddly comforting against your palm.

“I’m not doing this,” you had said, your voice heavy with resignation. “Goodnight, Tanimoto.”

“Where are you going?” he had asked, a note of panic creeping into his voice.

“To the gas station, or somewhere. I don’t know,” you had replied, your hand already on the door. “I’m going crazy in here with you. I need a break. I’m going to get a snack.”

You walked out the door, clicking the door shut behind you. Then, you turned your back on him and walked – walked away until you reached the stairs, until you reached the first floor, until you reached the empty lobby, where you collapsed on one of the complimentary sofas. The air carried that distinct aroma that only hotels seemed to carry.

With a stressed sigh, you rubbed your hands over your face. 

Pulling out your phone, you stared at the screen, the weight of Himeno’s words still heavy in your mind.

“Just because your husband’s in Tokyo, doesn’t mean you can’t talk to the kid. You can behave, can’t you? Just for a while? Just long enough to see him?”

“You can’t keep living in fear of your husband. You’re not powerless. It’s the twentieth century.”

And, in a moment of weakness, you dialed that damn number – the one you knew you shouldn’t have been calling. You dialed it and held your breath as the line rang once, twice–

“Hey,” Aki answered on the second ring. His voice was warm and familiar and immediately concerned – you missed him so badly. “You okay?”

You nearly broke down crying at the mere sound of him. It felt as if it had been so long since you had heard his voice, seen his face, felt his lips on yours. A week away, and it felt as if you had shot yourself through the heart. 

“I wanna see you,” You gnawed on your lip, trying to keep your voice steady, “Can you come get me?”

“It’s 11 at night,” He chuckled softly, though his voice didn’t hold an ounce of malice. “I thought you said we couldn’t see each other?”

“I wanna go for a drive,” You answered. You could cry. You wanted him to come get you – to rescue you from this Hell you created for yourself, to hold you close and tell you everything was going to be alright, that he missed you as much as you missed him. “ Please?”

There was a brief pause on the other end of the line, as if he were taking a moment to deliberate, before he released a long, tired sigh, “You still at the Hilton?”

I love you.

“Yeah,” A smile graced your face at the thought of seeing him again. 

It felt an awful lot like you had just returned from war to him.

In the background of the call, you heard him rustling around. Then there was the distinct, reassuring jingle of a keychain, “ Alright. Be there in ten.”

“I’ll be waiting in the lobby,” Your grin only widened – you felt a burst of excitement, as if you were a schoolgirl all over again. 

Only he had the power to make you feel that way.

You hung up and leaned back into the chair, letting the couch cradle you. 

The next ten minutes seemed to drag by. You tried to burn some time by walking around the lobby, then by flipping through the entire stack of magazines next to your couch – all while your eyes never strayed from the clock above the door. 

You were restless. So much so, in fact, that the moment it hit 11:12, exactly ten minutes after you had hung up, you felt your heart begin to flutter with uncertainty. Would he come? Was he running late? Did he get into an accident?

Did he still love you?

Just as you had begun to worry, you heard it – that telltale honk of a car horn outside.

Immediately, you bolted for the door, your robe flaring around you and slippers slapping against the polished floor. Your heart pounded as you spotted his sedan parked against the side of the building, away from the windows. Without a second thought, you hurried towards the car, barely noticing the cool night air against your bare legs – holding your robe tight around your chest as if that would calm the unsteady beating of your heart.

You flung open the passenger door and slipped inside, the familiar scent of him enveloping you. Then, when you were settled in, he peered down at you with those pretty blue eyes of his – lovingly, adoringly, for the first time in a week (and then some, though it had felt like a decade).

All traces of the word ‘Behave’ disappeared from your mind the moment you laid eyes on him. He was wearing a pair of plaid pajama pants and an oversized blue sweater. His hair was down – a little frizzy, like he had just woken up. 

“ Aki –” You sighed after all of one second, throwing your arms around him and pulling him in for a kiss that was both urgent and fervent. 

You pressed yourself against him, your body seeking the familiar warmth of his presence. As your lips met his, the kiss started gently, a tender brush of connection that soon deepened with longing. His lips were soft and slightly cool, a contrast to the heat that surged between you. You parted them slightly, your tongue tentatively exploring the contours of his mouth, seeking the taste that had become so familiar and intoxicating.

Aki responded with a quiet moan, his hands sliding up to cradle your face. His fingers were warm and rough against your skin, a grounding presence that made your pulse quicken even more. He smelled like him , like home.

You felt his breath hitch as you pressed closer, desperately. His hands roamed to your shoulders, pulling you closer.

When you finally broke apart, your foreheads rested against each other, breaths mingling in the small space between you. Your eyes fluttered open to meet his, and the gaze you shared was filled with a mix of relief, desire, and a touch of vulnerability. You could see the same raw emotion reflected in his eyes.

He laughed a little breathlessly, then, cheeks tinted with pink, “Hey, troublemaker.”

You couldn’t help but giggle back – like you weren’t hunched over the console of his car, making out with him in the hotel parking lot while your husband went to bed, “I missed you.”

“I can see that,” He smiled timidly, gently, handsomely and – Ugh!! 

“I can’t keep living like this,” You breathed out, cupping his face, feeling the contours of his jaw. It felt as if he would disappear again the moment you let him go. “Not seeing you. Not knowing when I’ll see you again. It’s driving me crazy.”

“Me, too. I’ve barely slept,” He replied, “I’ve been worried sick about you.”

“In secret, then,” You nodded, licking your lips, “We’ll see each other, still, just… in secret.”

“I don’t want to keep being your secret,” He answered with a sigh. His brows furrowed. “I wanna bewith you.”

“I’ll leave him–” You begged him. Anything – Anything to make him stay. You would do anything for him. “I’ll leave him, I swear. As soon as we’re done with this fucking– with this position in Tokyo, I’ll see an attorney. I’ll get the papers, and–”

“You don’t have to worry about all of that right now,” He smoothed his hand over your arm, over the fabric of your robe. 

“But it’s not fair to you,” You raised your voice ever-so-slightly, desperately, “I can’t keep leading you on like this. You deserve my everything , not just… being on the side. I wanna be with you and only you, all of you. I wanna leave and start over with you, start a new life with you, and a new apartment, and–”

Aki’s actions spoke much louder than his words. Gently, he reached for your head, pulling it close enough to cradle it to his chest. You buried your nose in his neck. 

“I feel so trapped , Aki– it’s like I can’t even breathe when I’m not around you. I don’t know what it means, but it feels as if–” Before you knew it, your eyes were watering, and your voice trembled with that weakness you hated so much, “It feels as if I shot myself right through the heart.”

“Hey,” He spoke up, calm and collected, as he typically was. “What’s wrong? Did something happen? Did he hurt you?”

“Not physically,” You cried. “I just– I can’t take it anymore– I need to leave.”

“Then let’s leave,” He commented. His hand twitched towards the gear shift. Still, he didn’t move the car just yet, letting you make the next move. “Where do you wanna go?”

“I wanna go home with you, Aki,” You wiped your tears away with the back of your hand. Sitting straight up in your seat, you looked up at him, “Please, I can’t– I don’t wanna go back in that room with him.”

“You know you can’t come home with me, baby,” He smiled softly – like the fucking angel he was. “I don’t want you to get in trouble. Not tonight.”

“I don’t even fucking care anymore,” You snapped, “I love you , Aki. I need you.”

And he leaned down, nose brushing against yours, touching the side of your face so gently that you thought he was a dream. “I need you, too,” He pressed a gentle kiss to your lips, “I love you, too,” Another, and then he sighed, “Don’t tempt me. I’m trying to keep you out of trouble.”

“Take me away from here,” You pleaded. You felt so weak . Your husband made you weak. You were weak for Aki, too.

Home wasn’t in Kyoto. Home was wherever his arms were.

“I will,” He answered. Sitting back, he finally shifted the car into gear – his blue eyes seemed to focus on the tear that made its way down your cheek. “Where to? Wanna go to the gas station and get a snack? A slushy?”

After a momentary pause, you nodded, wiping your tears away. 

“It’s okay,” He cooed, softly, patiently. “He can’t hurt you. You’re safe. We’re gonna get you a nice snack and then you’re gonna feel better, and you’re gonna tell me what happened.”

You only nodded again. Then, you let him drive you off into the night, leaving your clueless husband in the dust – leaving that damned hotel behind. And, for the first time since you had left his apartment a week or so ago, you felt a little better.

Aki pulled the car into the gas station, the warm glow of the neon signs casting a soft light over the hood. You glanced at him as the car came to a stop, and it struck you, as it always did, just how effortlessly attractive he was. Off the clock, away from the neat suits and crisp shirts, Aki looked so different, yet somehow even better. His sweatshirt hung from him just right, showcasing the broad line of his shoulders and the lean strength in his arms. His sweatpants were comfortably worn, soft at the edges, and hung low on his hips. His hair, usually slicked back for work, now fell loosely around his face in a tousled mess that made him look younger, more relaxed.

“I’ll be right back,” he said, giving you a quick, easy smile before stepping out of the car. You watched him walk into the store, his movements casual, unhurried, like he wasn’t weighed down by anything—not by you, not by tonight, not by the storm brewing inside you.

You stared out the window, trying to steady your racing thoughts. The air between you and Aki always seemed charged, even when nothing was happening. You wanted to believe this was all harmless—a gas station run, some time away—but there was something more, and you both knew it.

A few minutes later, the door clicked open, and Aki slid back into the driver’s seat. He handed you a slushy and a small bag of donuts, the sugary scent filling the car. “I remember you telling me you liked these,” he said, his tone so casual, but the weight of the small gesture felt heavy.

Your heart did a small, involuntary flip. That he’d remembered something so small—so inconsequential—made your chest tighten. You smiled softly, the warmth of the moment settling over you. “Thank you,” you whispered, taking the bag from him.

You turned to him, taking a sip of your slushy before speaking. “I don’t think we can do that again.”

Aki glanced at you, sipping on his slushy. “Do what?” he mumbled through a full mouth.

“Break up,” you said, wiping the condensation off your cup. “I was messed up the whole week. Thought it’d be easier, I dunno.”

Aki paused, sipping thoughtfully. “Break up?” He raised an eyebrow, then took another bite. “Is that what it was?”

“Kinda,” you admitted with a small smile, picking at the edge of your donut. “At least, it sure felt like one.”

He nodded, taking a long sip from his slushy. “I agree.” A beat passed, and then, with a teasing grin, he asked, “So… are we un-broken up?”

You snorted, shaking your head. “You mean seeing each other again?”

Aki shrugged, a smirk playing on his lips. “If you insist.”

“It was more like a break, really,” you shot back, laughing. “We knew we’d be together again someday. Does that count?”

Aki plucked a donut from the bag you had propped open in your lap. “Someday, huh?” he replied, pretending to be offended as he polished it off in two bites. “I think we both knew you wouldn’t be gone long.”

You rolled your eyes, grabbing another donut. “Sure, whatever helps you sleep at night.” Then your voice softened, and you glanced at him seriously. “But really, Aki, I don’t wanna live without you. I need you.”

He turned toward you, the playful banter giving way to something more real. “Yeah,” he said quietly, his blue eyes softening. “I need you too.”

He started the car again, the low hum of the engine filling the silence as you both sat back. You sipped your slushy while Aki took small, deliberate pulls from his own, his eyes focused on the road ahead. You smacked on the donuts, savoring the sweetness as if it could distract you from the heaviness of everything else.

After a few quiet moments, you couldn’t hold it in anymore. “He kept talking tonight,” you began, your voice low, almost as if you were ashamed to bring it up. “Saying I don’t seem excited to see him. That I never… touch him anymore.” You swallowed hard, staring out the window as you spoke, afraid to meet Aki’s gaze. “It’s like he doesn’t get it. He really doesn’t know what he did wrong.”

Aki didn’t say anything right away. He just kept driving, his hands steady on the wheel, his slushy untouched in the cup holder now. But you knew he was listening, really listening. You had to admire his patience – lord knew that you would not be able to sit before him as composed as he was if it were him talking about his wife.

“I just need to take my mind off of everything for a while,” you admitted, your voice soft, almost pleading. You felt drained, like you were holding on to too much for too long.

The thought of Aki belonging to anyone else, selfishly enough, made your skin crawl.

Did you have a right?

“I can help,” Aki said, and the shift in his voice was unmistakable. The air between you seemed to change, thickening with something unspoken but undeniably real.

You glanced over at him, and the look on his face made your heart skip. His jaw was set, strong and sharp in the dim light from the dashboard, but there was something else in his eyes—something teasing, a little dangerous. His lips quirked up at the corners, a small smile that didn’t quite reach his eyes, and his gaze dropped to your mouth for just a second before flicking back to the road.

Your mouth ran dry. The heat between you was rising, the tension humming louder now. “With what?” you asked, the words catching in your throat as your pulse quickened.

He glanced at you again, slower this time, eyes lingering on you before returning to the road. “Taking your mind off of it,” he added, voice low, each word deliberate, as if he knew exactly what he was doing.

Your breath caught in your chest, and the weight of the moment hung heavy between you, pressing down until it felt like the only thing in the world that mattered was whatever Aki had in mind next.

“How?” you asked, your voice soft but edged with curiosity, your heart racing in your chest.

Aki’s eyes darted toward you for just a second, a slow, knowing smile tugging at his lips. He nodded toward the back seat, where the fogged windows and dim light hinted at the kind of escape you both knew so well. The implication was clear, and your pulse quickened, excitement threading through your veins.

You knew you should refuse. You knew you should just say, not tonight , go back to your hotel room, and leave Aki with the weight of everything you'd already asked of him. It would have been the right thing to do, the smart thing. But that gnawing pull toward him, the heat between you, made it impossible to walk away.

You couldn’t suppress the smile that spread across your face, playful and just a little dangerous. “What happened to seeing each other in private?” you teased.

He raised a brow, smirk widening as he leaned closer. “You never said anything about fuckingeach other in private,” He countered, his tone low and teasing, the words hanging heavy in the space between you.

You exhaled a shocked little laugh, the tension between you both electric. “We’re not hooking up, Aki,” you sighed, biting your lip. Your heart raced as you leaned into him, the heat of his body pulling you in. 

“What’s a better way to celebrate getting over a break-up –” He teased, “Than makeup sex?”

“Not happening. Don’t start,” you retorted before closing the gap, your lips pressing a tender kiss into his.

But, for the record, you wound up crawling back into bed with your husband an hour later like nothing had happened.

a/n: I WANTED TO MAKE THIS MORE OF A SLOW BURN. but i absolutely HATED making them so miserable. they cant live without eachother. also aki's sigh of "be there in 10?" UGHSFHFDHFGHFG!!! i was so geeked up writing this. the next chapter coming will be full of that sweet goodness you all know and love (and know imma give you every time). stay tuned! lmk what yall thought of that long ass chapter, and what you wanna see happen in future ones!!!  Mama loves yall. Make sure you're taking your meds, drinking water, and doing your homework. Muah! x

credits: UNKOWN ATM. I found the cover pic on pinterest unfortch. If you know the artist, please let me know, so I can credit them properly for their work!!! This is NOT MY BEAUTIFUL DRAWINGGG. I obviously do not own csm or anything related to it. please do not reproduce, copy, or translate my works anywhere. dont fk w me im a bruja.

also: come find me on my wattpad if u wanna interact more!

taglist: @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505 , @acethebrave , @mitsuyeahhh , @sleepysnk , @enneadec , @noaabean , @em1e , @drakensdarling , @bertholdts--butt , @satanlovesusall666 , @mitsuwuyaa , @noctifule , @scaraphobia , @ask-the-insect-hashira , @lovingranchturkeyweasel , @bontensbabygirl , @slvdsjjk , @novacrystalli , @hanmastattoos , @kodzuksn , @hqtiny , @ohmaiscool15 , @redlittlequeen , @leivane , @goldeneagles-posts , @yeahblahlame , @no-oneelsebutnsu , @cookiesandcreammy , @cawwn , @the-haitani-baton , @littlelovebug98 , @armani78 , @mindurownbussines , @kokos-property , @violetmatcha , @hp-simp505

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[the-s1lly-corner]

tadc cast with a s/o who hates touch.

BUT when they finally get comfortable with the characters they get soooo touchy (as in hugs ,hand holding etc)

Sorry if i didnt make myself clear

And thank you for your work!! ;)

TADC cast x reader who's warming up to touch!

So sorry for taking so long to get to this anon <\3!! I recently went back to writing on mobile due to back pain from sitting at my computer and it's really done a number on my efficiency <\3

That said I hope you enjoy!

Side note does anyone know any tips on how to soothe sore throats? Preferably not with honey because honey naoes my throat swell and itch 😭😭

This post ended up being waaaaaay longer than I first intended so I hope yall are ready to eat up

LAST MINUTE NOTE I misread/misinterpreted this as "reader finally taking a step towards initiating affection for the first time" and not "they're already comfortable and LOVE touch" I am so so dumb but I already have this written <\3 I hope you enjoy this regardless anon 😭😭😭

CAINE:

I think Caine would struggle with the no touching thing especially since I see him being very affectionate both verbally and physically. That said I do think he eventually gets the hang of it and stops himself from throwing his arms around you for a hug... he amps up the verbal affirmations to make up for it though! He doesnt wanna make you unhappy so hes gonna respect your boundaries and take things slow!

As for when you start easing yourself into it, I think he would try to not make a big deal out of it, as not to risk embarrassing you. As someone who doesnt like touch as well as being hesitant to initiate it, I think I wouldnt want a big hoorah about it you know? But that's just me

He does subtly know hes proud of you for being able to take that step, even if you two are only holding hands via linking your pinkies together

POMNI:

I dont think pomni would be crazy about touch imo, she seems like the type to seize up when you touch her without warning. And I'm not saying that as something to be ashamed of because honestly me too. So I think this is one where you both need to have heavy communication in order to push past that and get used to touching one another ! Team work makes the dream work or however the saying goes

That said imagine you two grab each others hands bc something startles you/you both run from something (be it a prank from jax or an IHA or an abstracted) and you both just

Stare down at your interlocked hands. Experimentally squeezing each other before both relaxing into it

I think that would be a cute idea

RAGATHA:

Just like caine she is so so understanding. But unlike caine, she doesnt struggle all that much with trying go restrain from giving you physical affection. Ragatha naturally shows her love through quality time and gift giving, so she doesnt often feel the urge to wrap her arms around you, much less unprompted. Especially with your discomfort in mind

In the event that you come over to her, maybe lay your head on her shoulder while shes reading, I think she would stiffen up a little out of surprise, before gently leaning her heads against yours. Its nice, its quiet, and its comfortable. You two both peacefully exist like that for a while... good thing you guys probably dont have organs because ragathas heart would be pounding so fast, shes just so proud of you that the adrenaline kind of gets to her

JAX:

I think this might be the main one where there may be conflict.

Not because jax belittles your discomfort or tries to push the boundaries. No, I dont think he would, especially when you two get serious. Like would he probably poke you in the beginning before realizing it genuinely brings great discomfort? Yes. Would he stop when he finds out it's an issue for you? Also yes. Again, hes an asshole but I dont think he would be outright ab*sive

No, the reason why I think kay there may be conflict is because behind closed doors, jax can be very clingy and physically touchy, he would want to lay on top of you and hold you and that kind of stuff. That one ask with clingy jax hcs changed me

I think, if you ever try to initiate touch first he would say something kind of mean before he can stop himself. "About time" or something. Like he means it lightheartedly but like. He immediately regrets it, especially since that can just be so... eidkcmc.. when you're trying to come out of your shell in regards to something

Easily has the worst reaction, make him sleep on the metaphorical couch

I think he would do anything to fix that though, you're his lil bun afterall

KINGER:

Kinger is big on touch, he likes handholding and putting his hand on your shoulder. But ultimately he would respect you and not touch you.. honestly kinger can be the same way depending on the day. Either he hates touch and doesnt want anyone or anything touching him, or he needs to be held in order to keep his mind set straight. Poor guy. He just like me frfr.

Honestly gets a little spooked when you gently set your head on his lap, announcing you're going to take a nap while you two hang out in the pillow fort. Kind of gives a soft and surprised "oh!" Before going as still as a statue. Does he stay put? Does he run his hand through your hair? Does he keep up his bug ramble? Does he pipe down?

Ultimately he sits there quietly while you sleep

Expects that to be a one time thing, but he notices you're slowly becoming more physically affectionate. He outwardly shows his support and pride for you

ZOOBLE:

Another one who doesnt really like touch, but instead of it being a discomfort it's just a "I dont like it" thing you know? I mean what did you expect? Zooble doesnt interact much with people unless they're forced to, so it makes sense that touch isnt their thing. So this actually works out very well for you two.

Just like the pomni segment, you guys are going to have to do a lot of communication in regards to introducing stuff like cuddling and hand holding ect into the relationship and finding what works for you while keeping both parties satisfied. I think in the end zooble would be supportive, and even try to esse themselves into the whole thing. So you dont have to do it alone, you know?

GANGLE:

Honestly I think shes too shy and/or unconfident to initiate physical affection herself so the topic never really came up. Which... is a bit odd since it regards a comfort thing for you as well as gangle possibly thinking that you dont enjoy her company; assuming you never really tell her that touch brings you discomfort

But because we love healthy stuff here, let's assume you guys set down boundaries and stuff before getting together

I still think gangle would have some teeny tiny feeling that they arent the best for you. She knows its unfair to think that for both of you, but like. Its one of those nagging mean voices we all have/get at some point, you know?

Probably lets out a little squeak when you slowly wrap one of her arms around your hand and wrist. Kind of just stands there frozen. Too scared to speak up or move, fearing she would ruin the moment

Honestly I think gangle isnt used to touch (that isnt neutral or in passing), so this is going to be a little experience for her. You're both in this together now, basically

[gvnvks]

feeding zb1 boys … !

> pairings: non-idol!zb1 x fem!reader

> warnings: lowercase intended, not proofread

> song recommendation: tattoo by loreen

> note: i love this post sm hi yall

김 jiwoong.

you and jiwoong were enjoying a quiet evening at home, surrounded by the comforting glow of candlelight. the room was filled with a soft, serene ambiance, creating the perfect atmosphere for relaxation. jiwoong has just started doing his skincare routine and was seated in front of a vanity mirror, examining his skin.

you couldn't help but admire his dedication to self-care. with a smile, you approached him, holding a small plate of fruits and snacks. “here, jiwoong. i thought you might get hungry doing all that," you said sweetly.

your boyfriend turned to look at you, his eyes lighting up at the sight of the treats you brought. “thank you, love. you always know how to take care of me,” he replied gratefully. you sat beside him and picked up a piece of fruit, raising it to his lips. jiwoong opened his mouth obediently, allowing you to feed him. the sweetness of the fruit mingled with the affection in the air, creating a gentle and intimate moment between the two of you.

as he chewed, jiwoong's eyes never left yours. “you spoil me, you know that?” he murmured, a hint of adoration in his voice.

you chuckled softly, enjoying the opportunity to pamper him. “well, someone has to make sure you're well-nourished, inside and out,” you teased, brushing your fingers against his cheek.

jiwoong leaned into your touch, his eyes fluttering closed for a moment. “im lucky to have you,” he confessed, his voice filled with sincerity. your heart swelled with warmth, feeling the depth of his words. “im lucky too, jiwoong. being able to take care of you brings me joy,” you whispered, leaning closer to him.

Unable to resist any longer, your boyfriend closed the gap between you, capturing your lips in a tender kiss. when you finally pulled away, a smile graced jiwoong's lips. “i couldn't help myself. you're just too irresistible,” he said playfully.

he laughed, a melodious sound that warmed your heart. “you're right. ill save the kisses for after im all done,” jiwoong replied, winking at you.

as you continued to feed him, the peaceful atmosphere enveloped you both, creating a haven of love and tranquility. it was in these simple moments, surrounded by affection and care, that you knew your bond with jiwoong was unbreakable.

장 hao.

hao and you strolled hand in hand through the vibrant aisles of the open-air supermarket. the warm sun cast a golden glow upon the colorful food stands, creating a picturesque scene. the air was filled with the enticing aromas of freshly baked bread, sizzling meats, and exotic spices. as you wandered deeper into the market, you couldn't help but notice a delightful display of food standees arranged in a whimsical fashion. each standee showcased a mouthwatering array of goodies, from succulent fruits to delectable pastries and everything in between.

haos eyes widened with childlike wonder as he beheld the imaginative scene before him. “wow, this place is like a food lover's paradise!” he exclaimed, his voice filled with genuine excitement. you grinned at his enthusiasm and replied, “its definitely a feast for the eyes, isn't it? but i have a feeling we can make it a feast for our taste buds too.”

hao chuckled, his eyes twinkling with mischief. ”oh, really? and how do you propose we do that, my dear food connoisseur?”

you glanced around, spotting a charming standee designed like a miniature picnic setting. it was adorned with an assortment of bite-sized treats. ”i have an idea,” you said, a twinkle in your eyes. ”how about we have our own little picnic right here, right now?”

his face lit up with delight. “that sounds amazing! But we don't have any food with us…”

you winked playfully. ”who says we need to bring our own food when we have all these standees?” with a wide grin, you picked up a small wooden fork from a nearby stand. haos eyes widened in realization, a mixture of surprise and amusement dancing in them. ”you mean... you want to feed me?”

you nodded, holding out the fork with a mock serious expression. ”yes, my dear hao. allow me to be your personal food attendant for the day.” your boyfriend laughed heartily, playing along with your playful antics. ”well then, i humbly accept this honor. please, feed me, oh mighty food attendant.”

you giggled and selected a juicy grape from the standee, gently impaling it on the fork. ”your wish is my command, sir.” you brought the fork to his lips, and he playfully nibbled on the grape, his eyes fixed on yours.

the taste of the grape burst in his mouth, and he savored its sweetness. ”i think ill need a little more sustenance to fully appreciate your food attendant skills,” he remarked, his eyes twinkling.

you accepted his challenge with a playful smirk. ”challenge accepted! prepare yourself for a culinary adventure like no other.” with that, you moved on to the next standee, picking up a tiny sandwich. as you brought it to haos lips, he eagerly took a bite, his eyes still locked with yours.

each bite became a delightful dance, as you fed your boyfriend with small morsels of different flavors and textures. there were miniature quiches with their buttery crusts, delicate chocolate truffles that melted on the tongue, and tiny skewers of marinated meat that burst with savory goodness.

the afternoon wore on, and as the last rays of sunlight bathed the market, you sat side by side on a cozy bench, a satisfied smile adorning both your faces. hao leaned in and placed a gentle kiss on your cheek. “thank you for the most enchanting picnic ive ever had. you truly have a gift for turning ordinary moments into extraordinary memories.” you blushed, feeling the warmth of his words in your heart. “im just glad we could share this beautiful experience together, hao.“

as you gazed into each other's eyes, the market buzzed with activity around you. but in that moment, it felt like it was just the two of you, and nothing else mattered.

성 hanbin.

hanbin and you sat across from each other in a cozy corner of the restaurant, the soft glow of candlelight casting a warm ambiance around you. the air was filled with tantalizing aromas of delicious cuisine, and the gentle melodies from the live band in the background added a touch of romance to the evening. you couldn't help but smile as you looked at hanbin, his eyes sparkling with excitement.

the waiter approached your table, bearing an array of delectable dishes. as he laid them out before you, you couldn't help but marvel at the vibrant colors and exquisite presentation.

“you know,” hanbin said, his voice laced with mischief, “i heard that feeding your partner is the ultimate display of affection. care to test that theory?”

you chuckled, leaning in closer to him. “oh, is that so? well, im willing to put it to the test. but only if you promise to return the favor.” he grinned, a playful glint in his eyes. “deal.”

you reached for a fork, selecting a bite-sized piece of succulent steak from your plate, holding it up to your boyfriends lips. “open wide!”

he complied, parting his lips with anticipation. as he bit into the tender meat, a pleased hum escaped his throat. “you have impeccable taste, my dear.” chuckling at his playfulness, you replied, “well, ive had good practice. remember all those times i cooked for you?”

his eyes softened, filled with affection. “of course, how could i forget? those were some of the best meals ive ever had. you have a knack for making everything taste good."

you blushed at his words, feeling a swell of pride. “thank you, hanbin. it means a lot to me.”

as the night progressed, the exchange of bites and laughter continued. each morsel you fed each other held not just nourishment but also a delightful sense of closeness. between mouthfuls, you engaged in playful banter, teasing each other about your eating styles. hanbin would pretend to steal a bite from your plate, only to be met with a slap on his hand. and you would laughingly complain about his inability to resist devouring his food, leaving you trailing behind.

as the evening drew to a close, and the last bits of food were savored, you leaned back in your chairs, cherishing the contentment that washed over you. hanbin reached across the table, his fingers intertwining with yours. “thank you for this incredible evening,” he said softly, his eyes filled with gratitude. “i couldnt ask for a more perfect date or a more amazing partner.”

you smiled, your heart swelling with joy. “the pleasure was all mine, hanbin. im grateful every day for the love we share. and im so lucky to have you by my side.”

석 matthew.

you sat comfortably on a plush, oversized armchair, with your boyfriend snuggled up beside you. as you gazed into each other's eyes, a playful smile danced across your lips. the room was filled with joy and contentment, and the bond between you and matthew seemed to grow stronger with every passing moment. it was a picture-perfect scene, like a page ripped straight out of a fairytale.

on a small, ornate coffee table before you lay an array of delectable treats: freshly baked cookies, juicy strawberries, and a bowl of velvety chocolate. you couldn't help but giggle as you picked up a strawberry and playfully dangled it in front of matthews lips.

his eyes sparkled with anticipation as he leaned closer, his warm breath brushing against your fingertips. “you know, it's not fair to tease a hungry man,” he said with a twinkle in his eyes.

with a sly grin, you pressed the strawberry to his lips, allowing him to take a bite. his lips enveloped the fruit, and a sweet mixture of strawberry and his irresistible smile filled the air. “delicious,” he murmured, his voice laced with adoration.

you couldn't resist leaning in to steal a quick kiss, savoring the taste of strawberry on his lips. as your lips parted, noticed a smudge of chocolate on the corner of matthews mouth. chuckling softly, you reached for a cookie and dipped it into the bowl of melted chocolate. with a twinkle in your eye, you held it up to matthews lips, his gaze never leaving yours. “i believe you have a little something right here,” you teased, your voice barely above a whisper.

your boyfriends eyes widened in mock surprise, and he eagerly took a bite, savoring the sweet combination of cookie and chocolate. ”you realny enjoy taking care of me, don’t you?” he remarked, his voice filled with gratitude.

as the evening wore on, the air became filled with the sweet symphony of laughter and affectionate whispers. you and matthew continued to share these delightful moments, feeding each other and nourishing not only your bodies but also your souls.

the room seemed to radiate with love, as if the very walls were whispering secrets of everlasting happiness. the gentle flicker of candlelight cast a soft glow on your faces, accentuating the love and tenderness that enveloped you.

and as the night drew to a close, you and matthew found yourselves in each other's arms, wrapped in a cozy blanket, drifting off to sleep.

김 taerae.

taerae stood in the center of the room, his eyes closed, his figure radiating an air of serenity. his voice filled the space, effortlessly gliding through scales and arpeggios. you admired the way his body moved with each note, his hands conducting the invisible orchestra of his voice.

unable to resist the urge to be close to him, you approached taerae with a smile tugging at your lips. carrying a tupperware box filled with bite-sized snacks, you made your way towards him. as you drew near, your boyfriends eyes flickered open, a soft smile gracing his lips. “you're distracting me,” he teased, his voice laced with affection.

“but i come bearing food,” you replied, your voice filled with excitement. “a little fuel for your beautiful voice.”

taeraes eyes sparkled with delight as he observed the array of treats in the box. there were tiny sandwiches filled with his favorite fillings, dainty pastries with delicate frosting, and fruits sliced into perfectly bite-sized pieces. you had taken great care in preparing this spread, wanting to surprise him with both taste and presentation.

”i am a lucky man indeed,” your boyfriend said, his voice a low rumble that sent shivers down your spine. “but how can i concentrate on my practice when you're here, tempting me with these delectable treats?”

you giggled, the sound filling the room like a symphony. “well, taerae, i thought i could combine business with pleasure. you sing, and ill feed you. deal?”

taerae pretended to ponder for a moment, his hand resting on his chin in mock contemplation. “hmm, let me think... i get to serenade you and enjoy your culinary creations? that's an offer i can't miss!”

with a mischievous glint in his eyes, taerae resumed his vocal exercises. each note that escaped his lips was met with your encouraging smile. as his voice soared higher and higher, you picked up a tiny sandwich and held it out to him. taerae leaned forward, gracefully capturing the food with his lips, never once missing a beat.

the room filled with a symphony of sounds - the melodic strains of taeraes voice intermingling with the soft rustle of the box and the gentle hum of your admiration. you marveled at the way his voice effortlessly filled the space, each note floating delicately on the air.

with each bite, his expression morphed from concentration to pure delight. his eyes sparkled with appreciation as he savored the flavors you had crafted with love. as the last notes of taeraes vocal exercise faded away, he opened his eyes, a grin spreading across his face, the remnants of food still clinging to the corners of his lips.

“you are my inspiration.” he whispered, his voice a sweet melody that resonated deep within your heart.

리키 ricky.

the room was filled with the soft hum of rickys workout playlist, playing from the speakers, as he diligently worked up a sweat. dressed in a snug-fitting tank top and athletic shorts, his muscles flexed and glistened under the exertion.

meanwhile, you were sitting on the couch nearby, admiring his dedication and drive. the room was adorned with potted plants, their vibrant green leaves adding a touch of nature to the scene. a gentle breeze rustled the curtains, carrying the sweet scent of flowers from the garden outside.

in your hands, you held a plate filled with an assortment of fresh fruits, each one more tempting than the last. ripe strawberries, juicy watermelon slices, and succulent grapes were arranged artfully on the plate. the colors popped against the pristine white surface, creating a mouthwatering display.

as ricky finished a set of push-ups, his glistening form caught your attention. you couldn't resist the opportunity to surprise him with a delightful treat. a smile tugged at the corners of your lips as you approached him, holding the plate of healthy snacks.

“hey there, handsome,” you cooed, your voice laced with affection. your boyfriend looked up, a mixture of surprise and curiosity crossing his face. he wiped the sweat off his brow with the back of his hand and propped himself up, giving you his full attention. “what's all this?” ricky asked, his voice filled with both confusion and intrigue. his eyes sparkled with anticipation as he observed the colorful assortment of fruits on the dish.

“well,” you began, a playful tone in your voice, “i thought you could use a little bit of extra energy while you work out. and what better way than with some delicious fruits?”

rickys face broke into a wide grin, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “you really know how to make me happy,” he said, his voice filled with genuine appreciation.

you sat down beside him, crossing your legs gracefully. with a playful glint in your eyes, you picked up a juicy watermelon piece and brought it to his lips. ricky opened his mouth slightly, allowing you to gently feed him the fruit. as the sweet juices danced with the sweat on his lips, a delightful combination of flavors danced on his tongue.

“that's amazing,” ricky mumbled, his words partially muffled by the watermelon. he closed his eyes momentarily, savoring the delicious treat. when he opened them again, his gaze met yours, filled with adoration.

feeling emboldened by his reaction, you continued to feed him, exploring the unique combination of fruits. watermelon, with its crisp and refreshing taste, followed by the burst of flavor from grapes, and then the tangy sweetness of pineapple. each bite elicited a satisfied hum from your boyfriend, his face lighting up with joy.

between bites, you couldn't help but admire rickys strength and determination. his muscles rippled as he powered through his workout, his dedication evident in every movement. he focused on the task at hand, yet still allowed himself to enjoy the treats you offered.

as the last piece of fruit disappeared from the plate, you leaned back against the couch, a contented smile gracing your features. ricky sat up, wiping his hands on a towel nearby, and turned to you with a grateful expression.

“thank you, love,” he said, his voice filled with appreciation. “not only for the delicious fruits but for being there to support me, even in the smallest of ways. it means the world to me.”

you reached out to gently caress his cheek, your touch filled with affection. “ill always be here for you, ricky,” you replied softly. “in big moments and these smaller, ill be your confidant. and if that means feeding you fruit while you work out, well, consider it my unique way of showing love.”

your boyfriends eyes shimmered with emotion as he leaned in to place a tender kiss on your lips. the room seemed to glow with warmth and love, the perfect backdrop for a beautiful moment shared between two souls deeply connected.

김 gyuvin.

the sound of clicking keyboards and the occasional outburst of frustration filled the room as gyuvin sat in front of his computer, fully immersed in his video game.

you watched him from the couch, a fond smile playing on your lips. gyuvin was completely oblivious to everything around him when he was gaming, and you found it both endearing and amusing. with a little glint in your eyes, you decided to play a little game of your own.

quietly, you tiptoed into the kitchen and prepared a tray of snacks. mini sandwiches and an assortment of fruits adorned the tray, but the star of the show was a plate of bite-sized cupcakes. each cupcake was lovingly decorated with a unique design, from tiny gaming controllers to adorable pixelated hearts.

with the tray in your hands, you made your way back to the living room, careful not to make a sound. you positioned yourself next to gyuvin on the couch, and with a wide grin, you held a cupcake up to his mouth. he glanced at you in surprise, momentarily distracted from his game.

giggling, you teased, “hey, gyuvin, open wide! ive got a special treat for my gaming champion.”

your boyfriend blinked in confusion, his attention shifting from the game to the delicious morsel you were offering. he hesitated for a moment before obliging, leaning closer and allowing you to feed him the cupcake. the flavor exploded on his taste buds, and he couldn't help but moan appreciatively.

his eyes widened with delight as he finally realized what you were doing. “wait, did you make all of these? they look incredible!”

you beamed with pride, offering him another cupcake. “of course, i did! i wanted to surprise you and make sure my gamer gets the fuel he needs to conquer virtual worlds.” gyuvin chuckled, happily indulging in the second cupcake. “you really are the best, you know that? not just anyone would go through all this trouble just to feed their gaming boyfriend.”

you playfully poked his cheek, teasingly remarking, “well, not every girlfriend has such a dedicated gamer boyfriend like you. its my pleasure to make sure you're well-fed, even if it means interrupting your gaming sessions.”

your boyfriend grinned and leaned in closer, stealing a quick kiss before returning his focus to the game. “interrupt me anytime with delicious treats like these, babe. im more than happy to be distracted by your culinary talents.”

you couldn't help but blush at his compliment, feeling a warm glow spreading through your chest. as the evening progressed, you continued to feed gyuvin, alternating between savory snacks and sweet delights. occasionally, he would steal a glance at you, his eyes full of gratitude and adoration.

as the night grew darker, you continued to feed gyuvin, relishing in the simple pleasure of being together. the games could wait, but this moment, this connection between you, was something you treasured above all else.

박 gunwook.

gunwook stood in the cozy kitchen, his apron tied securely around his waist. the tantalizing aroma of freshly baked goods filled the air, promising a delightful afternoon ahead. you stood beside him, with a sparkling glint in your eyes and a mixing bowl in your hands.

the sunlight filtered through the kitchen window, casting a warm glow on the scene. the countertop was adorned with an array of ingredients – flour, sugar, and an assortment of colorful sprinkles. the kitchen itself seemed to hum with excitement, eagerly awaiting the sweet creations that were about to come to life. you and gunwook had always enjoyed spending quality time together, and baking had become a cherished activity for the two of you.

giggling lively, you dipped your finger into the bowl of batter and held it out for gunwook to taste. “here, love,” you said, a playful glimmer in your eyes. “try this. it's the perfect balance of sweet and creamy.”

your boyfriend raised an eyebrow, a smile tugging at the corners of his lips. he leaned closer, parting his mouth ever so slightly, and allowed you to feed him the raw dough. the batter coated his tongue, and a soft sigh escaped his lips. “it's heavenly.” he murmured, savoring the flavor.

encouraged by his reaction, you decided to take it a step further. grabbing a small spoon, you scooped up a spoonful of batter and held it just out of gunwooks reach. “open your mouth, gunwook. i have a delightful surprise for you,” you teased.

he chuckled, his eyes shining with anticipation. “alright, but you better make it worth my while.”

you carefully guided the spoonful of batter toward his mouth, maintaining just enough distance to make him lean in. gunwooks lips parted, and you skillfully fed him the treat, your fingers grazing against his lips in the process. the moment was intimate, a fleeting connection that spoke volumes about your affection for one another.

with each passing moment, the anticipation grew. your boyfriend would sneak a playful smile your way whenever your fingers lingered too long, leaving a light dusting of flour on his cheeks. the flour seemed to dance in the air, creating a whimsical ambiance within the kitchen. it settled on your apron, mingling with the sweet scent of vanilla and filling the room with a comforting embrace.

as the dough began to take shape, you found yourself engrossed in the rhythmic motion of mixing. the conversation flowed effortlessly, punctuated by light laughter and gentle touches. the kitchen was a sanctuary, a place where the outside world seemed to melt away, leaving only the sweet melody of your voices and the tantalizing aroma of the baking treats.

at times, gunwook would return the favor, dipping his finger into a bowl of sprinkles and offering you a taste. the colorful confections burst with flavor on your tongue, and your eyes met his, a shared sense of joy and love passing between you.

the baking adventure continued, with flour-dusted hands working in harmony. gunwook would occasionally dip his finger into the dough, taking a taste and declaring it perfect, only to steal a quick kiss from your lips. the sweetness of the batter mixed with the tenderness of your shared moments, creating a tapestry of love that enveloped the kitchen.

hours passed, and the oven timer chimed, signaling the completion of your delectable creations. as you carefully took the trays out of the oven, the golden-brown treats brought a smile to your face. your boyfriend leaned in, stealing a gentle kiss, his voice filled with admiration. “they look incredible, just like you.”

blushing, you playfully nudged him with your elbow. “flattery will get you an extra treat, my dear.”

together, you sat at the kitchen table, savoring the fruits of your labor. with every bite, you savored not just the taste of the cookies but also the memories created in the process. the playful exchanges, the stolen kisses, and the shared joy had transformed a simple baking session into a cherished experience, etching itself into the tapestry of your love story.

한 yujin.

in a cozy, sunlit corner of a quaint café, you sat opposite your boyfriend yujin, who was engrossed in his books and notes, studying for an important exam. the soft hum of chatter and the aroma of freshly brewed coffee filled the air, creating an atmosphere that was both invigorating and comforting. as you watched yujin concentrate, you couldn't help but feel a surge of affection towards him.

with a mischievous smile playing on your lips, you reached over and plucked a grape from the small bunch resting on the plate in front of you. you dangled it above yujins head, capturing his attention. he looked up, his eyes sparkling with curiosity, and you let out a joyful giggle.

“hey, yujin, i have something for you,” you whispered, leaning in closer. yujins brows furrowed slightly, but he closed his books and gave you his full attention. “what is it?”

you held the grape between your fingers and extended it towards him. “ta-da! open wide, my diligent scholar.”

his eyes widened in surprise, but a smile tugged at the corners of his lips. “are you trying to feed me, (y/n)?”

you nodded, excitement bubbling within you. “yes! i thought it might be a fun way to recharge your brain energy while you study.”

amused and touched by your gesture, yujin opened his mouth, allowing you to gently place the grape on his tongue. as he enjoyed the burst of sweetness, he couldn't help but admire your inventiveness.

“that's delicious," yujin murmured, his voice laced with gratitude. “you always manage to surprise me.”

chuckling softly, you picked up another grape, twirling it between your fingers. “well, i have a whole bunch of surprises for you, yujin. consider it my way of saying, 'you can do it!'”

your boyfriends eyes twinkled with amusement as he leaned back in his chair, his focus momentarily shifting from his studies to the moment you were creating. “alright then, surprise me, my wonderful cheerleader.”

with an air of mischief, you took the grape and traced it lightly along the outline of yujins lips, causing him to lean in even closer. “guess where the next one will go.”

a blush crept onto his cheeks, but he played along, his voice barely above a whisper. “ill take a wild guess and say... in my mouth?” you grinned, enjoying the playful banter. “correct! but how about we make it a bit more interesting?”

you plucked a strawberry from the plate, holding it up to yujins lips. “now, close your eyes.”

your boyfriend obediently shut his eyes, a mixture of anticipation and curiosity coursing through him. you slowly brought the juicy fruit to his lips, allowing him to savor its sweetness as he bit into it.

as yujin chewed, he opened his eyes, his gaze meeting yours, filled with adoration. “you know, (y/n), feeding me like this makes studying a whole lot more enjoyable. it's like you're infusing magic into each bite.”

your heart swelled with affection, and you tenderly caressed his cheek. “that's because you're my magical scholar, yujin. i want to support you in every way possible.”

a blissful silence settled between you, the world fading into the background as you and yujin focused on the nourishing act of feeding both his mind and his body. as the day wore on and the sunlight shifted, you and yujin continued this delightful ritual, exploring different fruits and flavors, sharing sweet moments amidst the rustle of pages and the clink of cutlery. in this serene corner of the world, you found solace in knowing that your love and support were helping yujin navigate his studies with renewed energy and enthusiasm.

gvnvks © 2023

[ritz-writes]

hhh sorry for lowkey spamming about spotlight au, but i rlly like it :))

heres a little drabble, continuing from this part <3

Words: 649

MK and Mei go to another show a couple weeks later, Heathers again. They tried to get Wukong to come, but couldn't convince him no matter what. MK was then convinced, based on Wukong's reactions to the orignal, that his mentor had a celebrity crush on Macaque.

After the show, a few people lined up to get autographs. Mei went to one of the other actors, while MK went to Macaque.

"Hi! Could I get two photos? I'm here with my friend."

"Not a problem." Macaque took two prepared photos on the table in front of him, a pen in hand and a smile on his face that didn't feel fake, despite how exhausted he was. "Did you guys enjoy the show?"

MK nodded fervently. "Yes!" The boy exclaimed. "This was our second time watching it!"

"Oh really?" Macaque felt a swell of pride at that as he signed the pictures. He always loved when people came back more than once.

MK made a noise of affirmation. "Our other friend came with us last time, but he didn't want to this time. Not to throw him under the bus, but I feel like he's intimidated by you, based on how he reacted last time we were here." He waved his hands around suddenly. "N-not in a bad way, of course!"

Macaque chuckled, picking up a third picture. "Nah, it's fine, I get that a lot. Here, I'll sign one specifically for him. Maybe he'll come back if I do. What's his name?"

"Really? Oh, that'd be great! Uhm, his name is Sun Wukong," he said nervously. "He's kinda my mentor."

Macaque's tail flicked, his grip on the pen tightening as he finally took in exactly who he was talking too. He recognized the boy from the news. The Monkie Kid, Sun Wukong's successor.

Wonderful.

Macaque tried to keep his smile up. "Ah, you're the Monkie Kid."

MK scratched the back of his head. "Ehe, yep. That's me. Monkey King really enjoyed the musical, but I couldn't get him to come this time for some reason."

Macaque was surprised at that. He honestly hadn't expected Wukong to listen when he told him to back off. And he actually enjoyed the show? Then again, he always did like seeing Macaque perform.

"I mean, I can tell he wants to come, but he just wouldn't budge! I have no idea why!" MK blinked, remembering who he was talking to. "Ah—sorry, I didn't mean to ramble."

Macaque held back a sigh as he came to a decision, one he really hoped he wouldn't regret. "You're fine, kid." He finished signing, feeling a twinge of bitterness from writing Wukong's name, and handed over the three photos. "Here. Tell the Monkey King he's welcomed to come back if he wants. So long as he doesn't cause any disturbances, I don't see any issue."

MK beamed at him, his grin bright enough to blind. "Thank you! I'll be sure to tell him that!"

Macaque waved as the boy ran off. He continued the rest of the day as normal, though he felt somewhat on auto pilot.

He really hoped he didn't just make a mistake.

The next day, on Flower Fruit Mountain, MK presented the signed photo to Wukong.

"Here! The guy that played Veronica was super nice and said you're welcomed to come back anytime!"

Wukong took the paper hesitantly, eyes widening at the sight of his name, written in Macaque's hand writing. "Wait, he... what did he say exactly?"

MK tilted his head. "Like, word for word? Uh, well he said so long as you don't cause an disturbances then it'd be fine. Why?"

Wukong felt his heart swell. It was an olive branch, a second chance. But did 'don't cause any disturbances' mean 'don't hurt me again' or 'don't talk to me again'?

He supposed he'd have to find out at the next show.

oop this came out longer than I planned it too hehe. This au has me by the throat now if yall cant tell

[shutupheathersorryheatherr]

XH Jungsu hcs pt.1

Summery: just what the title says. something hopefully you find cute, fluffy, and shorter to read approximately: 10 min read

a/n: mark my words next month I WILL do a pt.2 that's more in the hcs I did for jooyeon where its about how y'all probably got together and little scenes from yalls relationship just gotta get this gyu fic out first. please comment or reblog if you liked this!

warnings/info: kissing, some sort of relationship idk what tho never really specified, cuddles, mentions of washing your face (don't forget to wash the grime off today y'all) mentions of him needing reader but noting else of the like is mentioned, talking about changing a light bulb with wet hands (don't ask), a couple misspelled words ill eventually will get to and weed out. pls don't be mean I did most of this with no sleep

~this is simply a piece of fiction. my imagination onto "paper." this is in no way meant to be taken as an actual or real representation of anyone~

ok ok ok there's so many things I don't even know where to start!!

first of all, the softest human being you could ever ask for

I dunno man he just exudes cuddly-ness to me

speaking of cuddles, while I don't think physical touch is one of his love languages, that doesn't mean the first time he gets a taste of you so close to him, he doesn't wanna have you in each others arms for eternity.

Lazy. Morning. Cuddles.

nothing more even needs to be said on that. they're his favorite with you

tangled in the sheets and each others limbs all over the place, his arm about to fall asleep because you're laying on it.... facing each other...

there's not much in life that brings him more indescribable immense joy than to wake up next to you and turn over to scoop you up into his arms.

during times like these, you'd talk, about anything and everything cause it didn't really matter. he would always listen intentively and so would you, calming whatever worries you might have and making you feel like everything would be ok.

cause to be honest, it would be with him around

that brings another thing:

I feel like he's not only the type to listen and provide good advice when he feels like you'd like or need it, but he's also the type to see something going wrong in the moment and try his best to help pull you out of it

like if he can sense someone is making you feel uncomfortable he'll go over there by you, most of the time he doesn't really do much, knowing that you can handle yourself. but at the same time him making his presence known calms and comforts you

don't get me wrong tho, if the time is right he will be saying something to defuse or help that uncomfortable situation

skincare routines together!!!!!

like you cannot convince me that doing that together wouldn’t one, be extremely frequent, and two, is one of the cutest things to do ever

it all started when he gently helped you do it when you were too tired to do so yourself

he knew you’d be mad with yourself if you didn’t get it don’t you slept with an unwashed face

so, being the great guy he is he coaxed you into the bathroom and helped you with it

”lemme help you, sweetie.” He said “I know you’re mostly asleep already”

And there…. Was born a treasure of a tradition.

From then on you’d do it together cause quote “it was kinda fun”

imagine him gently rubbing your cheeks, nose, wherever, with your facial wash! It’d be so cute I can’t—

but most of the time it just consisted of you two doing it next to each other in the bathroom or bedroom mirror

sometimes he’d lean his head on your shoulder and stare up at you, the only thought in his mind how lucky he was to have you

God, just the thought of it— the word itself, even, made his heart swell with joy

Plus he thinks it’s really cute to do that little couple thing together

he boops his nose to yours. I won't be taking any comments

prue fact

honestly he's pretty much your best friend

thinks you're the coolest human alive no matter what you do

like you could be putting your shoes on and he's still mesmerized

he's standing there like "ugh the way you put them on?? I've never seen anything like it"

for real tho, he exudes this aura that makes you feel like you can do anything

and spurs you on to do just that!

cause you can! duh!

here's something I really appreciate about some people that I feel he'd be like:

as someone who is like, your best friend, he wouldn't always act like you're always right

though most of the time you are tbh

but sometimes you need that person telling you that hey, maybe this isn't the best decision and not just supporting you just cause

like a REAL supporter ya know

at least to me, someone who like really actually supports you is someone who will actually try and help if you need it and tries their hardest to make sure you don't get hurt

like "um yeah maybe changing a light bulb with wet hands isn't the best."

idk man most people know not to do that but you catch my drift?

don't get me wrong tho he still worships the ground you walk on

he just cares so much about you that he actually wants to help

also I don't know why this came into my mind but in the words of Alicia keys: he'll "love you when you're weak and love you when you're strong"

because unlike some, he wants to help because he cares, but that's not his only focus.

if you accomplish something, then he'll applaud you, never jealous. just happy you were able to do what you did

if you need help, he won't hesitate to help you

there's no room for any type of wounded masculinity with all the love he has for you in his heart.

I don't know how else to explain it but there you go

just... you're both a voice of reason for each other

I've said this before but you're like the seasoning that makes his life better

actually wait no

not better

the best it possibly can be

and who doesn't want their life to be the best it could?

ugh oh my god his kisses!!!!!

his kisses are the sweetest fr

they can either be the softest and sweetest thing you've ever felt or the could be the hungriest

but no matter what they always will maintain that softer and sweeter than cotton candy feel to them that you can never get tired of

he's got you chasing his lips after he pulls away type shit

he does he same to be honest lmao

no matter if he needs you

or if he just, I dunno, wants to kiss you lol

they're still so soft and somehow still delicate that even feathers would be jealous

holds your face and leans his body into yours when he kisses you and it makes the both of you smile into it

there's a lot of that

just joy that not only can't help but bubble over in how smiley the both of you are together, but also the way you've become around others

~end~

taglist: @itz-yerin

again, if you liked this fic, please leave some love like reblogging and or commenting! when you like something on Tumblr it only bookmarks it for you, not helping with getting the fic around to more people. and while that's not the reason I write, it really makes my day and invigorates me to write more when I see a comment or a reblog :)

2023 copy-write or shutupheathersorryheatherr please do not steal, translate, or copy my work even if you credit me

[archiiive]

How To Get My Husband On My Side

I usually love strong female characters and I love reading them. Not a big fan of weak or damsel in distress characters. But RUBY. Idk how to explain my thoughts and feelings about her. Ik it doesn't make any sense but I feel like this is what I'd feel about my own daughter if I had one (I just turned 20 last month lolol). Ruby is by far my most favourite manhwa fmc and the most beautiful girl in my eyes I'm not even exaggerating. Yall won't believe how many times I scroll back to see the panels Ruby is in. I don't think I've even replayed shirtless Izek that many times lmao. I just stare at her in awe. I can't help but smile. I just re read this manhwa for the 4th time today, I just keep coming back here. This manhwa is so beautiful, cute, sad, painful and heartbreaking all at the same time. I cry, smile, laugh, giggle, get angry, so many emotions all at once.

I feel so sad whenever I look at Ruby's eyes. I just wanna give her a hug. Ruby is by far one of the strongest characters I've ever read. Being strong doesn't necessarily mean being physically strong yk. Everything she's gone through, those are unimaginable. The fact that she's still sane is probably the biggest proof of how strong she is. Cause imagine being abused like she was for that many years (even in her previous life, or should I say lives), she's only suffering. I can't imagine how deep the trauma runs.

Every kind of Abuse destroy people. She has gone thorough so many kind of abuses. But man SA has got to be the most horrendous things to ever happen to someone, that too by her own brother, at her own house, for so many years, where the so called brother even spread rumour about their questionable relationship outside just so her marriages could be broken off. I can't imagine going through all of that everyday and still having to smile sweetly 24/7, not having anyone to share these with, no one to rely on and pretending to be completely fine. I'd never be able to last so long, I'd be long gone.

As much as I love Izek now, it's an undeniable fact that he was a jerk to her when she first came here. Okay he had his reasons cause her family couldn't be trusted yada yada but RUBY didn't deserve any of it. Good thing she escaped from the hell, her own house but then came here to be treated like a nuisance by her own husband. Okay he's changed now and he loves her and everything is good so I'll kinda forgive him too cause at least he's giving Ruby the love, warmth, support, reassurance, comfort now. She needed them so bad. She really needed someone to confide in.

Whenever I see her holding things in and not being able to talk about her past traumas and abuse with anyone and silently putting up everything that fu*king Cesare bitch a**hole ugly looking piece of sh*t son of a wh*re does in fear that things will get worse, I just want to go get myself off by a truck and isekai into the story and stab that filthy guy until my hands fall of. I don't think I ever hated or will hate anything as much as I hate Cesare. This manhwa keeps breaking me but I still keep coming back for Ruby and maybe a little bit for Izek too, love to see them together.

I'm so mad she had to endure all of that. Idc what Ruby does or ever did. I'd support her even if she were to take initiative to end the world. I'd gladly let her destroy everything, kill everyone including me if that's what she wanted, I'd give her everything she could've ever asked for and even more cause RUBY my love deserves everything. Okay but why do I sound like a mom tho lolol. I guess Izek has a stronger competition now cause at least I'd never treat that angel like precious munchkin the way he did in the past hmph.

So in conclusion what I wanted to say is, I LOVE RUBY. My loveliest most adorable bestest sweetheart. My heart swells with love everytime she smiles. She shines so bright I fear. Ruby is the most amazing, Ruby is the most beautiful, Ruby is the strongest, i wanna bawl my eyes out everytime I look at her eyes. And if anyone tries to hurt my Ruby and talk shit about her, I'm personally coming for you, you better sleep at night with an eye open. Cause Ruby might be the sweetest but I'm certainly NOT.

[alphasunpup]

Feedist Kinktober Day 20- Haunted House

You didn't want to go to the stupid spooky haunted house with your friends. But it was this or be forced to go to some that party and smell throw up for the next 5 hours. This was better

You enter the house with your friends and frown at the decrepit state of the house. You touch the walls and feel ash and dust on your hands. You also felt something touch back. You shiver and walk away from the house

Your friends are interested in seeing if they can find some ghosts. You're more interested in finding out what happened.

Why was this beautiful mansion abandoned and who is it haunting?

You hear a scream and lightning crackles in the air. The lights come on and in the foyer sits a beautiful fat black woman. Her head isn't turned towards you.

You scream and flinch causing her head to snap back and look at you. She's startled by you and takes a breath before she screams.

She asks what you're doing here and you day investigating a haunted house with your dumbass friends. She makes a face and hands you her business card. She's a real estate agent. So they house isn't haunted. It's just olf as fuck and under renovation. And yall are trespassing.

You apologize and face palm, telling her that you'll quickly find your friends and leave.

She decides there's no need for that and you should join her in the kitchen for something to eat. It is storming after all. And right on que, heavy thunder booms across the sky.

The lights flicker and you rush after her, not noticing that when the lights flicker, so does her form.

She offers you some freshly roasted venison, some cornbread, and some backed mac n cheese. You cry at almost the taste of home reminded of your grandmother's cooking.

You can feel your belly swelling against your costume. You swear you hear the old velvet chair creak under your ass. And you feel your chin wobble as you eat.

You don't notice as the food coma takes over the weakness in your heart. How your face has become slightly ashen. How your muscles have begun to stiffen and rigid. Or the fact that when the woman touches you. You don't realize her hand goes through you.

When you wake up, you feel different. Heavier and lighter at the same time. You're not really sure how that worked. The woman gazes over you fondly, now dressed in something from the 18th century.

"Don't worry my love, your friends can join us in our eternal paradise. After all, I'm just dying for some guests."

[whatever-lmaoo]

This got pretty lengthy so it’s goin under🥹

#“I’m sure.” Will be so for real😒

#“something in him burned and had made him turn quiet in the truck” probably the realization that he was so close to losing us and he started internally reprimanding himself for taking us for granted🤔

#“Bedroom. Now.” Yes sir🫡🥵

#“his eyes darkened and heavy with a level of desire that made your heart thunder in your chest and your cunt pulse with need.” Exccusseee meeee🎶

#“gripping your chin with enough force but still somehow gently” the way he can never be truly rough with us🥹

#“the sound making every part of him ignite with a need to claim you.” I’m ready to be claimed, arms and legs wide open😍 look I’ll tie myself to the damn bed if I have too😂

#“You looked at him calmly and full of trust, a tell in your gaze that he knew no one else would ever be lucky enough to receive and he would never take for granted.” And that ole hag said they don’t communicate😒 anyways I KNEW IT!!!🤩

#“knowing only he got to undress, reveal and expose every sacred part of you increasing his desire to love you even harder.” Let’s talk about it🥂: I like that you continuously refer back to him, not really being possessive but more so acknowledging how special we are and how lucky he is to be the one experiencing these intimate and mundane moments with us! Yes he knew we were one of a kind, but going through what they did and then their interaction with cam sort of just made things more clearer for him. Like getting a new pair of glasses, we think we can see everything until that slight change shows you the smaller details that you’ve been missing out on and it makes you take the time to appreciate them a lot more🥹💖 (it made sense in my head lmao😂)

#“Him and only him” again🤭

#“swelling with pride as you promptly abided, never hesitating to follow his instructions out of the pure love and trust you had in him.” Eeee I love their relationship so much🥹

#“singing it over and over as your mantra that gave him every bit of confidence that no one else would ever have the privilege to be loved by you.” Yall I’m too good bc what did I say!!!🙂‍↔️💅🏾 I will say that it is gradually feeling more possessive and I love it😍

#“His name and no one else’s.” I didn’t put them all here but every time you mentioned something that has to do with Will I imagined an emphasis being put on it (I apologize if that doesn’t make sense but my brain is pretty much dead rn😭)

#“…full of love and adoration and devotion, just as you were still full of him.”🥹🥵

#“He smiled against your lips, confident that no matter what, his was the name that would always tumble from your fucked-out lips, your body and heart his to possess.” HELLO?!?!? Haven’t been wrong yet😍(I say that yet I probably am wrong about everything Ive said so far😂) I love possessive Will, I need more honestly 😩

#“Man, you’ve really got it bad,” how could anyone not be down bad when they’ve got a man like Mr.Miller🥵

#“seeing five familiar men strut through, a pair of icy blue eyes locking with yours.” LMAOOO Our connection is so strong that we always end up finding each other🥹

#“more heat coursing through your body as Will matched your smile and winked at you” eee stop it🤭🌸

#“His blue eyes were fixed on Jess, grabbing his beer and sauntering over where he pulled out a chair and sat backwards on it next to her, introducing himself with as much confidence as ever despite the fresh bruises and cuts on his face.” YESSSS IM ROOTING FOR THEM!!!!! JENNY FOR THE WIN🤩✨💗

#“It was almost thrilling in a way, acting as if you weren’t head over heels in love with each other and were strangers instead, sharing loaded glances across the tables that separated you that gave a hint of the types of fantasies playing out in your minds that were in fact very real and recent memories, feeling like every song that played was about you.” I love when people feel so much for their person that they turn into lovesick teens🥹 the hopeless romantic in me is absolutely loving everything about their relationship 🤧

#“your draw to him its own beast.”🫢

#“his gaze loaded and full of a knowledge of exactly what was happening with your body each time he did,” I want someone to know and understand me as much as Will understands the reader🥹😭

#“You were already singing the lyrics, watching as Will’s grin stretched wider and his chest moved with a chuckle, a look that was full of endearment directed at you as you stood beside him and sang to him.” I NEED THIS RIGHT NOW

#“Before you could get another line out his mouth was covering yours, bending you back to dip you as he supported you with his arm on your lower back, your friends all cheering around you.” OMG OMG OMG LAURIE I LOVE YOU SO MUCHHHH LIKE I AHHHHH I NEED IT RIGHT NOW RIGHT NOW😍😍😍😍😍😍😍🌸🌸🌸🌸🌸

#“Anything you want, sweetheart,” he purred, his lust-filled eyes flickering over your features. “ THE SWEETHEART I CANT JDBDBBDKKDNNC YOU E OFFICIALLY BROKEN ME😲😲😲 GONNA BE DREAMING ABOUT THIS FOREVER 🙉 (I’m a country bumpkin myself so I heard a southern drawl in that and I just ksjdhdbdujdb I’m livin my best life right now🙉🥰😍🌸💖)

#“I can’t believe Benny and Jess,” JENNY SUPREMACY 🙌🏾

#“Raindrops sprinkled on your head when you stepped outside, the night air dewy and warm, breathing in the smell of rain instead of stale smoke and spilled beer.” So far you’ve brought all of my favorite fantasies to life so if we have a passionate kiss while being drenched in cool rain I’ll literally love you forever 🥹🤩

#“You let out a squeal that was swallowed by him, the rain falling faster and harder and soaking through your clothes within seconds, the sound of each drop hitting the hood of his truck echoing loudly in the otherwise quiet parking lot.” EXCUSE MEEEEEE 🙊🤩😍😲☺️ ITS OFFICIAL I LOVE YOU FOREVER!!!!!!! I HAVENT BEEN THIS HAPPY IN SO LONGGGG

#“Ben!” he yelled again, hitting the wall three more times. “Turn it down, man! Fuck!” LMAOO I remember having to go through that with my sister because she would be up playing video games or watching movies at 3 in the morning 😭

#“Move in with me.” AHHHH OT JUST KEEPS GETTING BETTER AND BETTER

#“I've spent so long never having a home, bouncing from place to place between deployments, and when I did have my own,” he paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “the other person didn’t want me to be a part of it.” That made me really sad but it’s okay because I needed something to bring me down from this high😭🌸 this is gonna sound selfish but if he didn’t go through that we wouldn’t have gotten a chance to starts life together 🥹🤧

#“feeling his breath gasp out onto your lips when he exhaled a relieved cry. “ it’s almost 3 in the morning don’t make me cry🥺☹️

#“Let’s go home, Miller,” eeeeee the things i would give to be able to say that in real life😩

#“Then I’m going to need to fuck you on every, single, surface…” I hope the back yard is getting added cuz imagine his sweaty skin shimmering under the stars and the moonlight showing off his defined muscles 🤭

#“Starting now.” A wicked smile that made you melt dressed his gorgeous lips,” 😳🫠

#“Are you wet for me, baby?” The real question is when are we not wet for you😂

#“Fuck, sweetheart, let me in that pussy,” you’re the one taking forever Mr.Miller😒🤭

#“Look at you taking my cock so well,” 🥵🥵🥵🥵

#“You squealed when he pinched your ass, pulling you tighter to his body where his laugh rumbled through him and onto you,” the playful side of Will will always be one of my favorites 🥹🌸✨

“You better wait to see what else we end up breaking.” knowing him he’s about to spend a fortune and the cashiers are gonna think we’re moving into a new place😂

“thinking how lucky he was to be loved by you.” Stop ittt🥹🥺😩 this was so amazing!!! I loved everything about this, from the “sex scenes” to the romantic gestures all throughout, to his possessiveness towards the beginning and him realizing that we aren’t to be taken for granted!!! I’m sure there’s so much more I haven’t mentioned but the bar scene and him dipping us is running through my mind right now😂 literally about to listen to that song on repeat so I can imagine Will doing that to me😍 This series is my favorite and I’m so proud of what you’ve accomplished and I hope that you are too!!🥹💖✨

Breathe

Part 9

Pairing: Will Miller x female reader

Words: 5.8k

Warnings: Rated E, 18+. Unprotected intercourse. Alcohol consumption. Swearing.

Summary: Will's feelings come to light in the aftermath of your run-in with Cam, and after more rifts between the two Miller brothers, your relationship progresses to the next step.

A/N: I'm not sure how many chapters will be left as this series starts to come to a close, but I hope you enjoy this next one and continue to be patient with me while updates take longer. Below is the link to the song featured in this chapter ⬇️

Series Masterlist

---

“Are you sure you’re not upset?”

“I’m sure.”

Will heard you sigh, and stood from where he knelt in front of the open fridge, meeting eyes with you as you held the door for him and passed him groceries to put away.

Your bottom lip was tucked between your teeth, the same worried expression you’d had on your face the whole way back to his place still dressing your features.

He wouldn’t deny he felt something.

Something he couldn’t quite put his finger on.

Not jealousy or even that he felt threatened by Cam, but something in him burned and had made him turn quiet in the truck, his thoughts taking him away which in turn made you anxious.

Each time he looked at you those undetermined feelings grew, brewing inside him with a demand to be acted on, making Will feel on-edge and short, his mind constantly mulling over the interaction and imagining the one that had happened at the bar that he didn’t witness, and the more he thought, the less he said.

You had turned away after handing him the last of the food needing to go in the fridge, working on unpacking a bag into the cupboards, and without thinking, Will walked over to you and grabbed the box of cereal out of your hand and placed it on the counter.

His look was stern while yours was confused, neither of you speaking as you shared a loaded glance that might have finally revealed everything he was feeling, his hand grabbing the hair at the back of your neck and tugging, angling your head to tilt back before he crashed his lips against your open mouth, kissing you hard.

Your hands tore at his shirt, untucking it from the waist of his jeans and then moving to the buckle on his belt, your kisses desperate and wanting.

Before you had a chance to get any further, Will roughly turned you around, his large form hovering over you from behind, his breath hot on your ear.

His hand slid between your legs, stroking you through your jeans from the back, the pressure he was applying making the material rub on your aching cunt in a wonderfully cruel way.

“Bedroom. Now.”

The way he growled those two words made you moan with need, your entire body alight and tingling with arousal, feeling his large hand splay out on the small of your back just as it had earlier when you had run into Cam.

You did as you were told, marching to his room despite your legs feeling numb from the nervous excitement pulsing through you, knowing if you stopped or hesitated, Will would simply pick you up and get you there himself.

You stepped inside and spun around, holding your breath as you watched him slam the door behind him, his eyes darkened and heavy with a level of desire that made your heart thunder in your chest and your cunt pulse with need.

He ripped his shirt over his head and then stepped toward you, gripping your chin with enough force but still somehow gently, your eyes fluttering closed as a heaviness that you knew was from lust overtook them.

You moaned softly when you felt his thumb graze over your bottom lip, waiting, hoping, wanting him to unleash whatever it was he was experiencing on you.

“Will…”

His name came off your lips so sweetly, so softly, followed by a small sigh that was mixed with a whimper, the sound making every part of him ignite with a need to claim you.

Still holding your chin between his finger and thumb, he crashed against your mouth, his tongue diving in deeply to taste you, swallowing each breathy cry that passed through your lips.

After a moment he let his hand fall to your neck, gently cradling your vulnerable column in his grasp, the thrum of your heartbeat vibrating against his palm as he reluctantly broke away from your kiss, his hands moving to grip the hem of your shirt and lift it off of you.

You looked at him calmly and full of trust, a tell in your gaze that he knew no one else would ever be lucky enough to receive and he would never take for granted.

You hummed and closed your eyes when his fingers slowly unfastened the button on your jeans, your body completely still other than your chest rising and falling with deep breaths as he slid the zipper down and pulled the denim to the floor.

Will pressed a kiss on your bare thigh while he helped you step out of each leg, moving up to pepper across your hips, and you squirmed slightly at the sensation as his hands splayed out on your waist, his nose running up from your navel to your chest and further still to your neck as he stood tall again.

He spun you around, his mouth landing on your neck as he peeled the straps of your bra down each arm, moving to kiss each shoulder in turn once they were bare, one of his hands unclasping the hook at your back.

His lips returned to your neck, sucking and licking at your tender skin, his fingers reaching around to pluck at your nipples that hardened from being uncovered and from his touch, your bum pressing into his cock that strained in his jeans when you arched into him.

He sighed against your skin, relishing in this moment, knowing only he got to undress, reveal and expose every sacred part of you increasing his desire to love you even harder.

Keeping one hand on your body, squeezing and caressing your flesh, he used his other to unfasten his jeans, ridding them as quickly as he could, his cock springing out to hit your cheeks when he pulled his boxers down his legs. Done with undressing himself, he slid his hand in the waist of your panties, rubbing your clit and smearing your slick up until you were whining and your breathing was growing ragged, your body simultaneously moving into and away from his touch.

“On the bed,” he ordered, his voice gruff.

You took a step forward, crawling on your hands and knees onto the mattress, the view making his cock twitch. He eagerly followed, his fingers catching in the waist of your panties to pull them over your ass as you moved forward, showing him your wet cunt that was more than ready for him.

Him and only him.

“Fuck,” he hissed, swiping two fingers through your folds, his eyes locked on your core like he was in a trance.

“Will, please,” you begged, your plea his to fulfill.

His.

He leaned over you, his hand smoothing over one of your cheeks to spread it apart, his thumb brushing your puckered hole as he did, his other bracing on the bed beside yours where he covered it and locked his fingers between yours.

Edging closer to you, he rubbed his groin against your lifted ass, his dick knocking against you as he settled behind you and between your legs.

Will moved his hips back and forth, dragging his cock along your folds, your hips lifting to try to land him inside your waiting pussy, and finally he did, a low groan coming from him as you cried and gripped the sheets with your free hand.

“Will!” you wailed, needily and submissively.

He pulled out slowly and drove back in again, filling you with himself, watching you melt to his movements.

It was his cock you were taking, your pleasure brought on by him, the reminder making him almost feel dizzy.

He moved the hand that was groping the flesh on your hips down to your stomach, securing it on you as he shifted forward to move you both further onto the bed, keeping himself buried in you as he adjusted.

“Lay down, sweetheart,” he urged, swelling with pride as you promptly abided, never hesitating to follow his instructions out of the pure love and trust you had in him.

Covering your body with his, he laid on top of you, rutting deeply into you with powerful strokes, the fat head of his cock hitting your g-spot each time.

He kissed your upper back, shoulders and neck, feeling you move under his weight as much as you could, your sweet moans filling the air and filling him with a satisfaction like no other.

He swore each time he pressed his lips against your neck you would declare your love for him, singing it over and over as your mantra that gave him every bit of confidence that no one else would ever have the privilege to be loved by you.

“Fuck – I love you, Will!”

“I love you too, sweetheart,” he would insist in return every time, never missing an opportunity to tell you and never wanting your love for him to feel unreciprocated.

“God, Will…” you continuously moaned, his name never sounding sweeter than off your lips.

He thrusted in you deeper, slower, giving you everything he had, your body responding to his generous pleasure in fits of cries and the roll of your hips.

He growled against your neck.

It was him who was making you moan and writhe with pleasure.

His cock filling you up.

His mouth tasting your sweat and feeling the softness of your skin.

You squeezed his hand, a signal of nearing your peak, encouraging him to fuck you harder and more thoroughly than ever, a sense of avariciousness blanketing him and turning him feral.

“I want to hear you scream my name,” he barked, his teeth grazing the skin on your nape where you shuddered and took in a sharp breath.

You reacted almost immediately to his ministrations, your form tensing below him, your muscles spasming and tightening, choking him as you came hard and soaked his cock that he pumped in and out of you furiously, his hand that wasn’t still holding yours sliding under your body to massage your clit.

His name cut through the air sharply.

Loud and unrestrained.

His name and no one else’s.

He bucked into you wildly, his open mouth smearing spit across your shoulder, continuing to rub your swollen bud roughly until he felt you explode around him again, all of it leading to his own end.

Your tight walls coaxed every drop of cum out of him, pulsing and drawing every ounce of his hot load, filling you to the brim as you squirmed underneath him, his eyes finally able to focus again where he saw your own saliva staining the sheets beside your face, your cheeks wet with tears and sweat, and you’d never looked so beautiful.

Will quickly pulled out of you and flipped you over so you were on your back, pushing back into your messy cunt while he grabbed your hand and locked your fingers together, bringing them up beside your head as he kissed you fiercely, still doing everything in his power to show you that only he could love you this much.

“Will…” you breathed when given a moment to, angling your hips to put him deeper inside you, the way you called his name different than just moments ago; full of love and adoration and devotion, just as you were still full of him.

He smiled against your lips, confident that no matter what, his was the name that would always tumble from your fucked-out lips, your body and heart his to possess.

You were sure it was just the drinks and the music and being with your friends that had you smiling the way you were, but as you sat at the well-used table at the country bar downtown and your mind began to drift to thoughts of Will, you knew the grin on your lips was all down to him.

“Man, you’ve really got it bad,” Grace laughed, like she knew exactly what you were thinking.

You simply nodded and shrugged, knowing there was no point in denying it or trying to pretend otherwise.

“And you said he has a brother, right?” your other friend Jess asked, having joined the three of you tonight.

Nicole nodded enthusiastically, “He’s just your type, too.”

“You don’t say! Well if he’s even half as good looking and satisfying as Will apparently is, I’ll have won the lottery!”

“I can introduce you,” you chimed, taking a sip of your drink.

“Yeah, I won’t hold my breath! It took us enough to just get you out of Will’s bed to come out with us tonight.”

You could feel your cheeks heat up, and you looked down at the table, your finger tracing in the wet ring of condensation from your glass, thinking back to that last few days and how simply perfect everything was.

Despite having spent every moment possible together, you felt like a part of you was missing, having agreed to peel away from each other so you could see your girlfriends and Will could go out with the guys after Benny’s fight, no amount of time together feeling like it was ever enough.

As if you sensed it, you looked up and through the crowd dancing between the bar and the front door, seeing five familiar men strut through, a pair of icy blue eyes locking with yours.

You laughed and bit your lip, more heat coursing through your body as Will matched your smile and winked at you, and you gave a wave to Frankie, Benny, Santiago and Tom who all made their way to the bar to get drinks.

“Out of all the bars…” Tom said with a chuckle, and you heard him ask the bartender to send another round of the same drinks to your table.

“We won’t bother you ladies!” Santiago called, earning some comebacks from the girls, but all you and Will could do was share a look that made your heart beat faster in your chest and butterflies swarm in your stomach.

Benny scoffed at Santiago’s remark. “Well now, I didn’t agree to that…” he drawled.

His blue eyes were fixed on Jess, grabbing his beer and sauntering over where he pulled out a chair and sat backwards on it next to her, introducing himself with as much confidence as ever despite the fresh bruises and cuts on his face.

The rest of the guys went and found their own table not too far off, forcing you to try to pretend like it wasn’t killing you to be so close yet so far away from Will, having a perfect view of him laughing and talking with his buddies and brothers-in-arms, vowing to focus on your own friends who you loved more than anything and deserved your attention.

It was almost thrilling in a way, acting as if you weren’t head over heels in love with each other and were strangers instead, sharing loaded glances across the tables that separated you that gave a hint of the types of fantasies playing out in your minds that were in fact very real and recent memories, feeling like every song that played was about you.

Jess and Benny were hitting it off, tucked together closely in their own little world while you, Nicole and Grace continued on with your night, laughing and singing and dancing, and whenever you checked over at the other table, Will and the other guys were relaxed and enjoying themselves.

Another hour or so had passed, a decent, warm buzz flowing through your veins as you watched Will lean against the bar nursing his beer while chatting with Frankie.

You continued to refrain from going over to him, choosing to admire him from afar and wait until you got back home to get your hands on him, but every time you saw the muscles in his back flex whenever he moved it became increasingly difficult, your draw to him its own beast.

The way he would look over his shoulder at you didn’t help your cause either, his gaze loaded and full of a knowledge of exactly what was happening with your body each time he did, completely honed in on the way you would shift in your seat like he was perfectly aware of how wet your panties were or how it felt whenever your shirt grazed over your peaked nipples.

You had just given yourself another reminder to be patient and wait until you were home to talk to him, knowing if you went within a foot of him your hands wouldn’t be able to stop touching his thick, warm body and you would be inclined to press your lips on every part of him you could while trying to remain respectable in a public setting, but then your favourite song came on and any restraint you scarcely had went right out the window.

‘You Look Like You Love Me’ by Ella Langley and Riley Green came over the speakers, pulling an even broader smile out on your cheeks until they hurt, and without hesitation, you were on your feet and essentially floating over to Will.

You were already singing the lyrics, watching as Will’s grin stretched wider and his chest moved with a chuckle, a look that was full of endearment directed at you as you stood beside him and sang to him.

“Excuse me, you look like you love me,” you sang, your hand trailing up his arm and across his back, your touch making him melt as he continued to smile and nod in agreement to the words of the song.

He pivoted to face you, his large hands landing on your hips that swayed to the tempo, a familiar hunger mixing with the adoration on his features.

“You look like you want me to want you to come on home…”

He nodded again, a quiet ‘Yeah’ sounding off his breath.

Before you could get another line out his mouth was covering yours, bending you back to dip you as he supported you with his arm on your lower back, your friends all cheering around you.

You gasped for air when he pulled you up again and broke your kiss, seeing him lick his lips that were still stretched in the most gorgeous, crooked smirk, and you knew you couldn't be expected to wait any longer to have him.

“Take me home, Will,” you whispered, a seriousness falling over your words despite the cheery tone of the song still playing around you.

“Anything you want, sweetheart,” he purred, his lust-filled eyes flickering over your features.

Will made sure rides were arranged before you left, confirming with Frankie that he would help get the rest of the group home in his truck and that the other girls would get a cab as was previously planned.

“I can’t believe Benny and Jess,” he commented, smiling as he looked back over his shoulder at them while he held the door open for you.

“They suit each other,” you said warmly, a sense of contentment and joy filling you and feeling like everything was finally turning out right.

Raindrops sprinkled on your head when you stepped outside, the night air dewy and warm, breathing in the smell of rain instead of stale smoke and spilled beer.

The lights on Will’s truck flashed twice as he hit the button on his keys to unlock it, illuminating the steady streams of rain that seemed to be falling more with each second.

You went to step around to the passenger side, but stopped when Will called to you.

“Hey, get back here.”

There was a hint of mischief in his eyes and a playful grin tugged up one side of his mouth, his hands held out with his palms facing upward for you to take which you happily did.

He closed his hands around yours and pulled you into him, kissing you hard, a low chuckle rumbling through you as he wrapped his arms around your back and held you closer to him.

You let out a squeal that was swallowed by him, the rain falling faster and harder and soaking through your clothes within seconds, the sound of each drop hitting the hood of his truck echoing loudly in the otherwise quiet parking lot.

You threw your arms up around the back of his neck, arching your body into his, his hands roaming your back and lower to your bum, squeezing and groping you without shame.

“Mmm,” he growled against your lips, slowing your kiss as he brought his hands up to hold either side of your face.

The smile on your lips was lazy and swollen and they glistened with moisture from both the rain and his mouth, the orange glow from the light pole in the corner of the parking lot illuminating them and making him even hungrier to get you home.

“I love you, sweetheart,” he declared, kissing you again as the rain continued to fall down on you, feeling rushed and unhurried all at once.

Will sighed for the third time, adjusting his pillow on the bed and turning over frustratedly.

You didn't say anything, waiting to see if he would calm down or if the situation was about to escalate.

Benny’s t.v. was so loud in his room it was as if it was on the nightstand beside Will’s bed, and his loud laughter that followed the noise of the show was just as extreme.

“Ben!” Will shouted, propping himself up and hitting the wall behind him with his hand.

He waited a few seconds but nothing changed, the volume remaining the same as he clearly went unheard.

“Ben!” he yelled again, hitting the wall three more times. “Turn it down, man! Fuck!”

He fell back against his pillow hard, breathing out heavily as he ran his hand over his face.

“Jesus Christ.”

“Do you want to go to my house instead?” you offered, knowing this likely wasn't going to end well, the tension between the two brother’s having increased over the past week.

They were all little grievances that seemed to be adding up; getting in each other’s way or eating the last of whatever food, a mess left in the kitchen or one of them doing a load of laundry while the other was in the shower, the small spats evolving into something you knew would come to a head.

Benny laughed even harder and Will shook his head in agreement. “Yeah. Before one of us punches the other.”

“You mean you punching him?” you giggled, climbing out of bed to get dressed.

“Exactly,” Will said, his eyebrows high on his forehead as he stood and grabbed his boxers from the floor and then a t-shirt. “I love the kid and I appreciate him taking me in, but man does he ever get on my nerves sometimes.”

You stopped where you were on the opposite side of the bed, frozen and without thinking as you blurted out something you had been considering for weeks now.

“Move in with me.”

Will stopped too, his hands landing on his hips after having pulled on his track pants. staring at you across the queen sized mattress.

“What?”

“Move in with me,” you repeated, smiling as you shrugged, your heart pounding in your chest as you saw the grin on his face grow.

“Really?” he asked, his tone and expression completely surprised.

“Yeah, really.”

You stood there nodding, watching his features change from shocked to elated, an emotion turning his blue eyes as wet as the waters they resembled as he walked over to you and grabbed hold of your face, leaning down to kiss you.

It had felt a bit silly to keep going back and forth between houses, one of you usually forgetting something you needed or having double of everything so you didn’t have to drag everything to and from, and since you got back together there wasn’t a night you could go without sleeping beside each other.

You were so nervous to ask, but this seemed to be the best way to go about it, your instincts taking over and giving you the confidence needed to get out of your own head and dive in, knowing from his reaction that he wouldn't be anything other than happy and excited.

He pulled away from you and looked at you with so much love and appreciation in his eyes, his thumbs rubbing your cheeks as he worked to get his words out.

“Thank you, sweetheart,” he began, glancing down briefly between your bodies to try to control his emotions. “I've spent so long never having a home, bouncing from place to place between deployments, and when I did have my own,” he paused, taking a deep breath before continuing, “the other person didn’t want me to be a part of it.”

It always broke your heart to hear of the hell his ex put him through, unable to believe someone could treat him so poorly when all he ever was was loving and honourable, and it made your decision in asking him to live with you even more right.

“I want you, Will. I want all of you, always,” you whispered, nudging his cheek with your nose, feeling his breath gasp out onto your lips when he exhaled a relieved cry.

You wrapped your arms around his torso, holding him tight until he was ready to pull away from you.

“Let’s go home, Miller,” you smiled, holding his hands where he squeezed yours three times.

He pulled in your driveway and parked his truck just as he had all the other times before, only this time it felt different.

Your house had always felt like home to him, but now it actually was, and the feeling he had in his chest was overwhelming.

“You can start moving your stuff over tomorrow,” you said, making him look over at you with a soft smile. “I’ll be at work but you might as well get a start.”

“Yeah, okay,” he nodded, smiling bigger.

You both got out of the truck and started walking toward the door, you filing through the keys on your keychain for the one for the front door.

“I’ll get you one made tomorrow,” you said, putting it in the lock.

“Are you sure you want this?” Will asked, making you stop what you were doing and turn to face him.

A solemn look was on his face, his apprehension and insecurity clear on his features even in the dark.

“Will…” you urged, stepping toward him. “I’ve never been more sure. I wouldn’t have asked otherwise.”

He smirked and looked down at the porch, sighing as he seemed to realize that his anxiety was getting the better of him.

“I was thinking about asking you for a while now, I was just nervous and thought it was too soon or you wouldn’t want to–”

He cut you off when he crashed his mouth against yours, pulling you into him at the same time he turned the doorknob to open the door, walking inside while still attached to your lips.

You broke apart after a minute, and you stood breathless as you watched Will gently close the door, keeping eye contact with you the whole time.

The smile he gave you and the look in his eyes lit your skin on fire, and you held your breath without thinking, watching as he walked toward you slowly.

“If this is going to be our house,” he spoke carefully, “Then I’m going to need to fuck you on every, single, surface…”

He closed the space between you, forcing you to lean back against the small hall table that sat on the wall, the clink of his keys in the dish where you kept yours making you jump.

“Starting now.”

A wicked smile that made you melt dressed his gorgeous lips, his face hovering beside yours but not touching you, teasing and testing your patience.

“Turn around, sweetheart,” he cooed, and as you did, your track pants were already being tugged down your hips, your panties along with them, and you braced your hands on the wall knowing that the table wouldn’t support the force he was about to unleash on you.

“Are you wet for me, baby?” he asked, driving his hand between your legs where he stroked through your folds to check.

You gasped at the sensation and pressed your hips down to increase the contact, needing to feel as much of him as you could even if you weren’t ready to take him yet.

It didn’t take long though, feeling your slick accumulate and spread on his fingers the moment he planted his lips on your neck and started kissing you, your moans sounding out to mix with his heavy breathing as he got more worked up with each second that ticked by.

You reached behind you and grabbed his hard cock through his pants, running your palm up and down his length that strained through the soft material, his teeth nipping at the skin on your neck in response.

“Fuck, sweetheart, let me in that pussy,” he growled, pulling his pants down where his cock sprung free and you were able to massage the silky, bare skin before he shoved it between your cheeks and dragged it in and out to prep it with your arousal.

Just to be sure you were lubricated enough, Will spit in his hand and covered his shaft, his teeth clenching together tight as he did, watching you arch your back to shift your ass closer to him, your legs spread to display your waiting cunt for him.

He drove in hard between your folds, filling you in one swift movement, his thrust slamming you forward with such force it jolted the table against the wall, your hands flying up to stop yourself from falling into it too.

Will didn’t seem to care about marking up the paint or how unsteady you were on your feet, hammering into you with a ferocity that made your head spin and your body respond by succumbing to his movements, feeling your climax already building quickly, a shiver running up your spine.

“You feel so fucking good,” he growled, his pace increasing despite you finding it unbelievable that it could, and he wrapped one hand around to your front that wasn’t holding your hips to keep you on his cock, grabbing at your tits that shook under your thin t-shirt.

You did everything you could to find something to hold onto, the wall no use with your hands slipping down it, the table shaking violently in front of you, but it was all you had, and as you landed your palms on it you saw the dish holding both your sets of keys in it wobble to the edge and fall, the glass smashing on the floor.

A laugh escaped you, quickly turning into a cry as Will continued to destroy you, his name coming off your lips in a mix of a plea and a praise.

“God, Will!”

The tip of his cock hit your g-spot with each blow, making you ache and melt with each second that passed, your mouth hanging slack while uncontrollable moans came out of it, your resolve reduced to nothing.

“Look at you taking my cock so well,” he praised, a bit of amusement heard in his voice, giving your nipple a twist before lowering his hand to your clit where he rubbed it quickly and aggressively as he kept his brutal tempo.

“Fuck!” you wailed, your eyes squeezing shut as your body jolted from his advances, slipping between falling apart and holding off your imminent orgasm, wanting it to happen just as badly as you wanted this to never end.

“God damn,” he muttered, stealing a glance down at his cock disappearing in and out of your cunt that leaked and coated him with your cream.

That addictive, blinding euphoria ripped through you, making you buckle and collapse in a spasm but Will was there to catch you, supporting you with his arms wrapping around your torso while he rammed into you and prolonged your high, letting up something he could never consider.

Broken wails of his name decorated with curses spilled from your mouth, feeling your body start to come back to functioning right when he was losing his control, his grunts bellowing out loud and clear behind you as he used you to fuck to his end.

He held you close to him, gripping your flesh tight as he bucked furiously into you and filled you with his cum, and you purposefully squeezed your walls around his pulsing cock to draw every last drop out of him.

The scruffiness of his beard scratched your neck, adding to the overwhelming sensations already bombarding you, feeling goosebumps erupt on your skin as you shivered and his breath blew out on the wet spots left behind on your neck from his mouth.

He stuttered his hips against your ass one last time, a quiet curse coming off his lips as he started to settle from his high.

Will pulled out of you and assessed the area around you, seeing the shattered glass to the left of where you both stood, and carefully kneeled on the rug, his hands smoothing down your waist, his lips meeting the soft skin on your hips and bum.

He heard your smile, a sated noise passing off your lips, making him ache to have you close to him again and not wanting to move on from this moment quite yet.

Grabbing your hand, he tugged on it for you to follow him.

“Come here a sec,” he requested quietly, looking up at you as you turned around and complied, meeting him on the floor where he pulled you to lay with him.

Will sighed and let his head thud against the hardwood floor, staring up at the ceiling as he relished in the movement of your fingers gently sweeping up and down his stomach after having lifted his shirt up, your head nestled on his chest.

“So, every room in the house?” you asked, a playfulness clear in your voice.

“Not just every room,” he corrected. “Every surface.”

You squealed when he pinched your ass, pulling you tighter to his body where his laugh rumbled through him and onto you, your hand dancing up the trail of blond hairs that connected his navel to his groin.

You shifted your feet and kicked one of your sets of keys that had fallen, the jingle of them making you giggle and readjust your head on his chest after glancing to see you hadn’t hit any of the broken glass.

Will grabbed a chunk of it and held it up. “I’ll buy you a new one.”

“You better wait to see what else we end up breaking.”

He laughed and let the piece fall back onto the floor beside him, turning his head to press a kiss on the top of yours, and inhaled another deep, satisfied breath as he closed his eyes, thinking how lucky he was to be loved by you.

---

Taglist:

@sotwk @dailydragon08 @sunnys-day @thedreadandthefugitivemind @glassgulls

@littlenosoul @glitterypirateduck @momia2910 @maggotzombie @rmwarn90

@paintlavillered @casa-boiardi @stealfromthedevil @kmc1989 @justreblogginfics

@spaghettificationandpretzels @whatever-lmaoo @steviebbboi @charethcutestory02

@christinhunnam @hp-hogwartsexpress

[watchmegetobsessed]

Grammy Winner Husband - Harry Styles

a/n: okay, yall know im a suckr for dad content and i just needed to write this little fluffy thing. also MY BABY IS A GRAMMY WINNER IM SO PROUD OF HIM and also, Sarah and Mitch are gonna be parents???? my heart can’t take all this *sigh*

pairing: Husband!Harry / Dad!Harry x Pregnant!Reader

word count: 1.3k

masterlist

“Congratulations once again, Harry. This Grammy looks great on you,” the interviewer compliments the grinning man who still very much feels like he is in a dream and his phone could start ringing anytime, ending this ethereal feeling of becoming what was only a dream when he was just a boy.

“Thank you,” he cracks a humbled smile.

“How are you gonna celebrate? Popping all the champagnes?”

“Honestly?” he sighs. “I just really want to kiss my wife, that’s gonna be my celebration,” he chuckles shyly, making every woman close to him swoon at his sweetness.

He accepts all the congratulations, the little shiny golden award weighing in his hands, not letting it out of his sight as he makes his way to the back to change his outfit back to something casual instead of the bold statements he has been making all night with his boas.

“Good night, Harry. Tell Y/N I said hi!” Sarah runs a hand down his back, grabbing his attention immediately. She’s gotten rid of her leather bodysuit as well, wearing just jeans and an oversized t-shirt, but her bump is making an appearance in it regardless. Mitch is holding his girlfriend’s other hand, their bags occupying his other as he smiles back at Harry with proud, shining eyes.

“Good night, you guys. Drive safe and thank you for tonight.” Harry pulls her into yet another hug, careful not to hold her too tight.

“Good night, see you soon,” him and Mitch share a quick hug as well, patting each other on the back before stepping back. Sarah’s hand runs down her belly, an instinctive motion Harry has seen quite often lately and not just from her and it reminds him how badly he just wants to get home to you finally.

While most performers and winners are probably out for some celebrations, champagnes must flow all directions, Harry quickly loads his things in his car and heads home to the one person he would ever want to celebrate with. It’s late, way past midnight by the time he arrives home and he has a guess where to find you.

Being the angel that you are, you left the lights on for him so he doesn’t have to blindly make his way to the bedroom. He kicks off his boots, drops his bag to the couch in the living room, placing the award on the dining table before padding down the hallway, the muffled sound of the TV and the strobbing lights of the screen still on in there, illuminating the doorway. He pushes the door that’s ajar open more, his smile immediately widening as he sees you curled up under the sheets, the TV remote still in your hands, your phone lying on the pillow next to your head while you’re fast asleep.

You swore you wouldn’t have problem staying up this late, but Harry knew it was not gonna happen, especially because ever since you’ve reached your third trimester bedtime was moved to seven o’clock, no exceptions.

Harry takes a second to adorn the beauty he has the luck to call his wife, before he quietly tiptoes into the bathroom connected to the bedroom to quickly wash up and get ready to his way of celebration: holding his pregnant wife in bed, falling asleep smelling your shampoo and maybe feeling a few tiny kicks under his palms.

Following a speedy shower he brushes his teeth, washing away the taste of that one glass of champagne he allowed for himself, he has been very restricted when it comes to alcohol ever since you found out you’re pregnant. Partially because he wants to take solidarity with you, having to say no to a good wine whenever you’re out for dinner, or a beer you occasionally drank with him while watching a movie. But he also feels like alcohol would just take away memories from his brain he wants to cherish forever.

Lifting the covers he tries to slip into bed next to you as gently and quietly as possible so you don’t wake up, but the moment the mattress sinks in under his weight, your eyes flutter open, blinking up at him sleepily as you register what’s really happening.

“Oh shit, you’re back! I really wanted to be awake when you arrive!” you pout at him as his arms curl around you, pulling you to him gently, his smiling lips pressing a kiss to your forehead.

“It’s alright, baby. I know how tired you always are.”

“Yeah, but my man won a fucking Grammy! I wanted to jump at you the moment you walk in,” you giggle, nuzzling your head into the crook of his neck. “I’m so proud of you, baby. Congrats!”

“Thank you,” he smirks blushing softly. He is still not used to the title he has earned today.

“You looked so hot on stage, that leather suit was awesome,” you grin, cupping his face, turning it towards you so you can see his bright, shining eyes.

“Yeah? You liked it?” he shyly asks, his finger grazing on your belly, tickling you a little in hopes the little one inside is still up, or went to sleep just like his mommy. “Mm, loved it,” you grin, pulling him down for a sweet kiss, one he was waiting all night to finally get. “And I love you.”

“Love you too, baby,” he hums against your lips, his palm coming to connect with your bump. “How are you feeling?” he asks, nuzzling his nose against yours.

He knows how this third trimester has been on you, the swelling and back pains killing you but you never complained as much as he knew you could have. He admired your strength all through this pregnancy, from the way you handled morning sickness, all the mood swings and changes in your body to the point where you are now carrying a literal watermelon at this point, having left only three more weeks until the baby arrives.

“I’m good, a little hungry maybe, but what’s new,” you chuckle.

“You want me to make you something?” he asks right away, ready to get out of bed to make you a sandwich or bake you cookies even if that’s what you wanted. But you push him down back shaking your head at him.

“It’s fine, I can wait until the morning. I just want to kiss my Grammy winner husband stupid right now,” you grin before leaving a sloppy kiss on his chest, chin, nose and finally, his lips. Pecking your lips a few times he makes you lie on your back as he slides down and pushing your shirt up, his adorning eyes fall to your belly, hands coming to gently cup it.

“Hey there, little one,” he murmurs as he leans closer and kisses your stretched out skin just above your belly button.

“He hasn’t moved in a while, think he’s asleep,” you smile, fingers running through his curls as you watch him pepper your belly with more feather-like kisses. Harry has been ecstatic since you found out you’re having a boy, though he would have been just the same if it was a girl.

“S’alright, I’m just gonna wish him goodnight,” he smiles, pressing his cheek against your bump before he kisses it one last time, pulling the shirt back down over it. Climbing up he pulls you back into his arms, knowing how much you like being held normally, but since you’ve fallen pregnant, you’ve become especially cuddly, which he doesn’t mind a bit.

“I love you, H. So proud of you,” you huff, feeling your eyes closing. Harry grabs the remote and turns the TV off, placing it to his nightstand along with your phone before kissing the top of your head.

“Love you too. Thank you for being here for me,” he huffs, the smile never leaving his lips. He has never felt happier and more complete ever in his life.

“Always,” you whisper before drifting back to sleep.

Thank you for reading, please like and reblog if you enjoyed it!

[idontblushsrry]

Love Language|| Jujutsu Kaisen

“I wanna be fluent in your love language. Learning your love language.” 

A/N: If you didn’t guess from the tagline this is inspired by the song love language by Kehlani. I’ll probably do more of these with different shows and what not because why not. If I missed anyone lmk and I can make a part 2. Also please tag spoilers appropriately esp for manga readers, that being said spoilers for the prequel? manga on Yuuta’s part.

Characters: Itadori, Fushiguro, Kugisaki, Maki, Inumaki, Okkotsu, Gojo, Nanami, Sukuna

Warnings: said it b4 but spoiler warnings in general but esp on Yuuji, Yuuta, and Maki’s parts

Plot synopsis: The 5 love languages; physical affection, quality time, words of affirmation, gift giving and acts of service, and how each jujutsu kaisen character shows their love and affection for you. Ft. a gender neutral reader!

Word count: 2352

Itadori Yuuji

Love Language: Quality time and physical affection

Ok listen-

So for physical affection, Yuuji’s just that kind of person

He is all about giving to you

He’s holding hands with you if you’re ever walking anywhere, and if you’re not a hand holder pls pls pls let him hold your pinky he likes the reassurance

No but seriously he loves to hold you like yall could be walking in completely opposite directions and he’ll try to find some way to hold onto you until the very last second

And even then he’s all ‘:( babe imy’

‘Yuuji we just talked 2 minutes ago’

Another way he shows his love is through quality time

I think for him this is the biggest thing overall, esp as a jujutsu sorcerer bcus you never know yk but also because you’re important to him

Like remember how he literally went to occult club so that he could get out of school in time to go visit his grandpa...ye :(

He also loves finding dumb touristy things to do with you while in Tokyo or anywhere yall go together on a mission 

If you get together before he died and came back then that time he had to spend away from you literally killed him

Like my mans was goin THROUGH it

He almost considered spoiling Gojo’s secret

When he sees you again, he’s not gonna let go for like a solid day

Fushiguro Megumi

Love Language: acts of service and words of affirmation

This boy loves you so much

He loves to tell you all the things he loves about you when you’re alone

But he’s a little awkward with his words sometimes, hence where acts of service come in

He’ll immediately offer to hold your things, run to help you train or study, and if you’re cold? He’s fully prepared to never see his jacket again

Also he can’t cook but he’s fully prepared to suffer hearing Sukuna and suffering through Yuuji’s antics if it means he can learn how to make your favorite food

He also will surprise you by making you a playlist of all the songs that you’ve had stuck in your head and sends it to you randomly out of the blue one day like ‘thought you might like this’

However the best of both worlds is when he leaves you little notes throughout the day or sends you texts asking if you need anything or just encouraging you to keep going 

Negl he’s lowkey the president of the Y/N support club bcus-

You need anything? It’s yours

Cravings? Sad? Angry? What do you need bby, I’ve got it for you

Also he’s totally the type to be like you need help fuckin this person up? 

Also before yall started dating, Fushiguro was a mess

He was constantly asking to spar with you and go on missions, basically anything he could do to be near you  

End of the day, Fushiguro loves you and makes sure you know it whether it’s through his actions or his words

Kugisaki Nobara

Love Language: physical affection

So, she’s not the best with words, she tries but like someone help her bcus she is LOST

Like when she had a crush on you she was like “c’mere dumbass i wanna give you a hug”

In fact, she still is like “c’mere” but now you are dating :)

She loves you though and at first she doesn’t really know how to show it 

But one day you both come home from training and you just look at each other like ‘yeah today sucks’ and yall both just held each other for the rest of the day 

After that, she decided that she wants to do that with you but like always

She’s holding your hand, kissing your cheek when you go shopping, etc. etc.

She really loves to cling to you because she always has this fear that maybe one day you’ll get killed or just disappear so she figures might as well hold onto you for as long as we’ve got

After missions, she’s running up to you and if you aren’t prepared for the tackle, you’re probably gonna fall

On dates too, like if you guys have to meet up for a date, she’s tackling you

On the subject of dates...

She doesn’t mind PDA, and while she might hold your hand or arm so that you don’t get separated

She also doesn’t mind wiping food off your face and eating it, only to then kiss the spot on your face the food was previously at

She will split her shopping load between the two of you, however she will be slightly pouty if she’s carrying more than you (she then cheers up when she realizes she can do more shopping to “balance” the two of you)

In private she’s very cuddly and kissy which honestly isn’t that bad until it gets hot

At which point she’ll just say turn on the ac or convince you to walk around in a tank top (or something like it) so that she can continue holding you

Tbh she prefers the big spoon, but if she’s ever upset you let her be the little spoon >:(

All in all a very loving girlfriend who tries her best to show how much she loves you by glomping you at any given moment. 

Zenin Maki

Love language: acts of service and quality time

So you’re telling me that Maki wouldn’t immediately go out of her way to make sure her and her s/o can spend as much time together as possible?????

Like she’s super observant (which can cause her to be a bit harsh, see Yuuta) but she can always tell what’s bothering you

So if you’re upset that you haven’t been spending enough time together due to her being out on missions or otherwise busy she’s immediately running to finish her stuff and spend time with you.

((She’s very sorry, but on the bright side she brought your favorites!))

Maki is also an acts of service type

This mostly ties in with her kind of direct action way of thinking

She thinks she’s slick but you can always see her sneaking around to do small things like grabbing your laundry for you and folding it

She’s very much like if you love someone, you gotta prove it

Overall, dates with her are very intimate and personal to the two of you

Like she’ll take you to a frog pond you landed in during a fight once

Or you’ll take her to a street fair that serves this exclusive food that Maki mentioned wanting to try 

However, Maki shows her love through quality time and acts of service and while she does receive love from these to a degree, she is very much a words of affirmation gal

She’s not insecure in her day to day life but she has her moments, everyone does

Sometimes, she’ll feel like shit and a failure and all she wants is for you to say that she’s doing amazing and that she’s a great girlfriend.

Inumaki Toge

Love language: Physical affection

Because of his curse, he can’t exactly express how he feels about you through words

He does text you frequently throughout the day (I’ll have to do a hc abt that someday)

But he’d prefer not to be on his phone to communicate if you’re right in front of him

So he does the next best thing and just smothers you in physical affection

He loves kissing you the most

Like he could spend hours just kissing you if you let him (please let him)

But in public, he gets if you’re not a big fan of pda he’s willing to tone it down as long as he gets kisses later in private

He’d still prefer it if you held his hand or linked pinkies maintaining touch in some way

Also, unrelated, but it means so much to him if you try to understand his sushi language

He knows realistically the foundation of any relationship is communication so already he’s at a disadvantage because of his curse 

But if he sees you like take notes after he says something or start to need him to text you to translate, his heart is swelling

Like ‘omg this person loves me enough to learn a whole new language <333′

Another tangent but before you were together he was struggling so muchhhh

Like how does one express their feelings for someone without words?

If you’re Inumaki, you buy some flowers and text said person to meet you at a cafe

It took an embarrassingly long time for you to realize it was a date, but once you did, you ever so gently linked pinkies with Toge

Okkotsu Yuuta

Love language: words. of. affirmation. 

He’s literally so sensitive please tell him you love him regularly

In return he’ll be sure to tell you how much he loves you too

He knows that he can’t really be there for you as much as he’d like but he likes to let you know that he’s thinking of you

Doesn’t matter the time, if you call, he’s answering

If he doesn’t he’ll cry he’ll immediately call you back and is apologizing for missing your call

You assure him it’s no big deal but the man has his volume turned all the way up and changed your ringtone to one specific for you by the time you’ve even said hey

Aside from that, he really is sensitive

He’s been through a lot especially with Rika as well as growing up alone and bullied 

So for him, it’s everything to hear that you like having him around and don’t think he’s too much or anything like that

Of course, he gets better with time, trusting you and having the confidence in himself to not need constant assurance

That being said, if you ever just whisper in his ear, “I love you, Yuuta.”

That’s not your boyfriend, that’s a puddle of love on the floor

(Maki, Panda, and Inumaki had a field day when they saw him, Fushiguro now questions if Yuuta really is a respectable 2nd year.)

Gojo Satoru

Love language: gift giving and quality time

So Gojo doesn’t exactly get to spend a ton of time

Between missions, him beefing with higher ups, and you and him playing parent the baby sorcerers yall don’t exactly get time to go out much

In which case Gojo tends to default to two options:

He’ll either go the extra mile to try and spend time with you 

Whether that be an at home date where he tries and fails to surprise you with a home cooked meal

Or a date out at a restaurant or cafe (which you tend to visit after his home cooking efforts)

OR he’ll bring you various souvenirs from his missions

He loves to spoil you, and if he could he’d probably bring you back a whole store’s worth of stuff

But alas, airport security regulations

Anyways, he loves to spoil you especially if he can spoil you with sweets because it benefits him in two ways 

He treasures all the time you spend together, and he does try to overcompensate for his absence with gifts

Despite your assurances, it’s kind of a guilty pleasure at this point (just let him, trying to argue just goads him on further)

He doesn’t only buy you small things, he enjoys buying you outfits

And he especially likes seeing you in them 

Kento Nanami

Love Language: acts of service

Y’all remember the episode where he killed that curse that was bothering that baker lady?? Yea that

He’s literally such an acts of service boyfriend it’s not even funny

Before you got together, he would memorize your coffee order and bring you a cup pretty much everyday like clockwork

Now that you’re togehter, he wakes up before you so h=that when you wake up there’s the smell of coffee throughout the house

When you come out of you’re shared bedroom and he’s just scrooling through his phone like “mornin’”

Of course you already made the bed and ironed his clothes because relationships are give and take

And then when you leave for your jobs in the morning, he kisses you and holds the door open for you

He’ll draw a bath for you if he gets home before you, if you let him join or not is up to you

Also, if you ever get sick, he’s actually the best

Like he isn’t the best cook but he can heat up soup and tea

He’ll run to the store while you’re asleep and when you wake up, there’s like a whole tray of food in front of you and he’s like ‘it’s important to eat and drink so your body can heal’

And when you inevitably fall asleep after eating and taking medicine at his insistence, he tucks you in and clears away the dishes, exiting with little more than a kiss to your head

Ryoumen Sukuna

Love Language: gift giving and acts of service

So like Sukuna never says he loves you...ever

But he does notice if someone or something’s making you uncomfortable, and if so, said entity’s head will be presented to you later that day

You also just so happen to be the only person he can tolerate being around him for longer than 20 seconds

He also loves to give you jewelry, he likes seeing you adorned in something from him

He also isn’t gonna just handle all your problems for you, he will push you to become stronger by training with you 

He’ll also expect this energy to be reciprocated, as long as you’re pushing yourself to be better, he’s content with that

(He wants to see you grow because he’s scared that if he ever gets caught lackin one day you’ll end up dead)

He’ll never tell you or admit it, but Sukuna truly does care for you and hold you in a regard that he doesn’t have for others

So be grateful jkjk