#it kinda feels like theres a condescending undercurrent in that family gossip of me being a pathetic loser wholl never amount to anything | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

violasmirabiles · 2 days ago

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ive spent two weekends in a row at my parents house because of reasons (was bribed with food last weekend and this weekend it was infinitely more practical for my brother to pick me up and drop me off here than my own apartment, like, distance wise) and i love my parents and i know this is not their intention but my fucking GOD i havent able to relax at ALL. meaning i havent really been able to rest after work week for two weeks in a row now and i can Feel how fucking tense i am i can Feel how fucking fast my heart is beating and i have a stress headache and i kind of feel like crying alllll the time. the things we do for love and all that

#genuinely had a lovely time with the brother and the sister in law. we had dinner and watched umk #earlier this week the brother and me went to see nothing but thieves in helsinki and had a lovely time. so much fun honestly #but i couldnt just fucking Not make yesterday easier on him and the Rather Pregnant sister in law #already feel like a shit person shit kid shit sibling shit friend. but thats whatever #apparently half the family has made a huge fucking deal of the two of us spending time together and thats kinda amusing #but - and i know im making things up here -#it kinda feels like theres a condescending undercurrent in that family gossip of me being a pathetic loser wholl never amount to anything #again it does not help here that i havent been able to really relax. cant during week cant at parents house. i know this #sure wish i had a less fucked up brain sometimes

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