#it just would be funny if we get him trending on tumblr on his birthday

[dailykafka]

Franz Kafka is kinda trending (it's not in top 10 yet but the tag is colorful) and I wonder if it will show up in trending if we all write happy birthday post or something related to Kafka and tag it as franz kafka

[noirapocalypto]

ᴛʜᴇɴ & ɴᴏᴡ - ꜱᴠʟᴇᴍ

I saw the trend floating around, and I wanted to participate. I want to talk a little bit more on just how important Salem has become to me. 🖤

The picture on the left is one of the very first portraits of Salem I had taken. I think I had made him a bit earlier, but I officially introduced him to Tumblr on January 24th, 2022 (four days before his canon birthday, which funny enough, wasn't assigned until way after). And the portrait on the right is one of my more recent ones, that I've taken last month (June 19, 2023).

When I made him, he was just a side character. A little project that sparked when I discovered the genre of music I would eventually associate him and his character with. I wanted to create something that I thought was unique at the time. I wanted to do something different from the usual character tropes that I usually do. I didn't expect to fall deeply in love with his entire concept.

(Left picture: taken September 9, 2022 - Right picture: taken June 22, 2023)

I've always defaulted to female characters in any type of game where I could create and customize my character. I just never questioned it and felt it was what I should do, but I never really connected with them. I'd play around for a while, then get bored and move onto the next OC. And so on.

Salem wasn't my first male character, he was actually the last of my main six. But for some reason, the moment I started writing through his eyes, it just felt right. That's when the questioning started. What did that mean for me? Why am I suddenly far more comfortable writing through the perspective of a male than any of my hundreds of female characters I've been writing for all these years? Why am I now suddenly wanting to default to playing male OC's? I began to explore things through him, things that I've come to find out I really enjoy and connect with. Things that make me happy and feel right. It was through Salem that I figured myself out a bit more, that I wasn't what I was told I was my whole life by people around me. I think that's one of the reason he's so special to me. I found myself through my character.

But not just that, I also found people that mean the world to me through Salem. My social circle expanded--I now had people that shared the same interests as me, that liked what I had to create, that encourage me and support me. People that I could be myself around. I met my best friend (hi, bestie 🖤) because of Salem, who at the same time, met his best friend in their OC, whom Salem loves as much as I love mine. I met friends from all over that I care for deeply and love very much--people I would have never met otherwise. That's one of the reasons this fandom is important to me and why I stick around, no matter how hard things get.

(Left picture: taken September 9, 2022 - Right picture: taken July 11, 2023)

I know VP was never really my strong suit. A lot of my shots are very plain and simple, most of them are just portraits. In fact, I feel my style hasn't really changed much since my beginnings in this fandom. I'm never really going to be able to make all these elaborate set ups or be able to tell his story through virtual photography. My brain just doesn't work that way. I struggle a lot trying to improve and "catch up" with everyone else. And I'm growing to accept that. I think it's okay, that my talents and skills are stronger elsewhere. I just want to be able to capture him and share him with the rest of the world--to participate in the joy and camaraderie of loving the things we create so dearly.

While Salem isn't a self-insert, he does have a lot of me in him. Which I think is why I latched on so hard. He's all of my interests and beliefs personified. He's what I would like to be, how I would like to look. And he'll always be with me. Salem will forever be my main OC. Doesn't matter the fandom, if this one is still alive and kicking years from now--or if I've moved on to different media--Salem will always be my muse and he will always live on through my stories.

[purplesurveys]

1180

The last time you washed your hair, did you use conditioner? Yeah, I’m pretty paranoid and always feel the need to use conditioner because of a bad rebonding job from like a decade ago that stiffened up my hair as soon as it would get wet. It lasted for around a year, so I formed the habit of always using conditioner every time I shower. I don’t think I’ve ever used just shampoo since then.

Do you prefer light or dark jeans?  Dark, but I suppose it would be nice to start experimenting with lighter shades as well.

When you listen to music, do you generally sing along, or just listen?  It depends if I know the lyrics or I’m feeling the song at the moment. Obviously with my new obsession with BTS I can’t really sing along to entire songs, but I do sing the few English lyrics they have per song, hahaha.

Do you have any of your exes as friends on Facebook?  Yeah but she’s been muted for like half a year already, as is the rest of her family. I do have plans to unfriend her entirely; I’m just not sure when I would push through with it, and I already gave Angela permission to log onto my account one of these days to be the one to do the unfriending.

Who was your first love? Do you ever miss that person?  Gabie. I miss the friendship sometimes; I don’t think I’ll have a friendship as deep and connected as the one we had, so I will always feel sorry about how that went to waste. But I don’t really think about our relationship anymore as I’m pretty good at blocking off certain memories, so I don’t miss her in that sense.

How many cars are parked at your house right now?  Two.

Do you have any Italian ancestry?  I highly doubt so. If anything there’s probably a tiny drop Spanish blood in there but that’s the most European I’ll ever get.

Do you prefer water to be ice cold or at room temperature?  Like, drinking water? Ice cold, always. I hate warm water.

Has anyone ever told you you’re a control freak?  Not to my face, but I know I’m one so I’m sure other people have said that about me at least behind my back.

Do you know anyone who has gone missing? If so, were they ever found?  Yes, my friend Mik and one of my aunts. They were both found eventually.

What was the spiciest thing you’ve ever eaten?  Eating ghost pepper instant noodles was a pain I would never want to go through again...I threw that shit out after my first forkful, lmao.

Do you need to talk to someone?  No, not in particular. In a more general sense I do wanna start gaining more friends though, so I’ve been meaning to expand my circle by creating a new Twitter account just for my BTS dump. In other words, I am a 23 year old with a stan Twitter HAHAHAHA

Is something confusing you at the moment?  No, I’m good.

When was the last time you had a real deep chat?  Maybe my conversation with Andi a couple of nights back. We were talking about a tricky situation with their ex-friend who turned out to be a real dick when they came out to him a year ago, and they just wanted to get my perspective on how I would handle it.

Who did you last see on webcam?  The PR manager for one of our clients, who we all despise because he doesn’t know how to do his job. Thankfully he’s resigning soon so we’re all just waiting for him to leave and finally meet a much more competent replacement.

What’s your best friend’s pet’s name(s)?  Angela has two dogs, Hailey and Kennedy. Andi had Apollo, who I wanted to meet so badly but sadly he passed away a week ago at 15.

Have you ever taken a picture while laying in the grass?  There are photos of me sitting on grass, but not lying in it. I would imagine that would feel very prickly and uncomfortable.

Who’s your favorite Disney character? Baymax or Flynn Rider.

Have you ever deliberately tried to get someone drunk?  I’ve made my friends chug drinks or down shots and it’s happened vice versa, but it was always in good fun and we never made each other harassed from it. It’s just your typical college rambunctiousness, and if anyone felt uncomfortable or iffy then we didn’t hesitate to move on.

When was the last time you used a pay phone and who were you calling?  I’ve only ever seen those in my first school, when I was in kindergarten. I never got to use it and they also took them out not long after.

Do you like being kissed on the neck?  Yessssssssss

Have you ever had sex with someone you weren’t dating (but had feelings for) in the hopes that they would ask you out later?  Nope. I don’t think I would have sex with anyone I wasn’t dating.

What’s the most you would be willing to spend on a good bra?  Probably a couple thousand bucks if I thought I looked good in it.

Do you have any of your teachers’ personal cell phone numbers saved in your contacts list?  I don’t think so. I never tried getting close with any of them, and I always tried to stay hidden as much as possible. I was just in class to get good grades and pass.

Do you ever stalk peoples’ personal blogs, even if you don’t know them very well?  I never really scroll through people’s Tumblrs anymore. That was more of a thing I did in like 2013, but these days going through my dashboard is enough.

What’s one thing about today’s generation that you just can’t stand?  Some social media trends done for clout make me revolted, especially when it has anything to do with wasting food. I also hate when they do extreme pranks that I know I wouldn’t find funny if I were ever the victim, like tossing someone’s phone into the ocean.

Be honest: how do you feel about abortion?  Pro-choice. 

Is there anyone you currently want to reach out to?  I would love to catch up with Katreen at some point, but I know we’re at different points in our lives now and it would probably never happen.

What is your favorite piece of art you own?  I commissioned my sister to make an artwork of the 2D1N cast, and she did a great job making it! I haven’t gotten to use it or promote it yet, but I will soon. It’s really well-done.

What’s the one thing you apologized for this month?  Replying late.

My favorite color is ______?  Pastel pink.

I wish I had _____?  Longer weekends.

What did you buy today? Nothing – I’d call that a success lmao, I’ve been spending money as if I had a million fucking bucks over the last week. I did have some packages arrive today though: my own copy of 2 Cool 4 Skool (my first physical BTS album!!!!!!); the official poster from their album BE; the Ivy Park sneakers I ordered earlier this month, and an Ivy Park bucket hat Bea had apparently gotten for me as a birthday present.

What has challenged your morals?  Vices.

What made you pick up the last book you started reading?  I had to read it in preparation for a one-on-one session with my employer’s CEO.

What about your life concerns you the most? Whether a stable future is in the cards for me.

What do you find particularly offensive? Would you say you’re easy or difficult to offend?  Probably Filipino-American comedians or influencers who use stereotyping of Filipino accents and habits as a punchline; they do more harm to the culture than good. I can tell you not one Filipino who lives in the Philippines actually finds those funny, and Bretman Rock is probably the only personality who’s able to flaunt the culture in an entertaining and hilarious yet classy way.

When it comes to being offended, I guess it depends on the context. My humor can get pretty dark and low-blowy, but I would have a problem with someone who I know has genuinely problematic views.

What was the last series you finished watching? Do you have any plans to begin another?  I think it may had still been Start-Up from last December. I’m not too big on Korean dramas since I find one episode waaaaaaayyyyyyy too long. I don’t think I’ll be starting on anything soon, Korean or otherwise.

What is one way in which you are different from a year ago? What is one way in which you are still the same?  I’m single now, for the first time in technically six years. I also think I’m doing better and happier, breakup notwithstanding. OH and I love wasabi now, hahah. As for what’s unchanged, I still like taking surveys and I’m still stuck at home, though the latter’s not really in my control anymore.

If you could learn about anything without the stress of grades or cost, what kind of classes would you take?  I’d just go back to UP for the free tuition. We also have the widest range of programs out of any university in the country, so it’s a damn good deal.

Name a song you’ve listened to today?  Fly To My Room - BTS

When you were younger, did you have a swing set or a playhouse in your backyard?  We didn’t; but one of our relatives that we’d regularly visit did have a playground that I’d use all the time. It’s still there, just very unmaintained since no one uses it anymore.

Is your mall nice?  Which one? We have five different malls nearby lol. Mall culture here is on another level.

Do you have a Sonic near you? If so, what’s your favorite drink from there?  No. I’m not so sure what they serve there, either. I’m guessing milkshakes?

Will you be voting in the presidential elections next time around?  I’ll always exercise my right to vote.

How do you feel about chocolate-covered strawberries?  I hate strawberries and I hate fruits, so even if you coat that shit in Nutella and cookie butter and chocolate syrup I still wouldn’t touch it.

Did you ever stop having feelings for someone and then started having those feelings again for them? No.

Do you hate the last guy you had a thing with?  I’ve never had a thing with guys.

To whom did you last give the finger?  I haven’t had to do that in a while.

What was the last musical instrument played in your presence?  My sister’s keyboard.

Do you like sprinkles on your ice cream?  Not particularly. They make things look cute, but they never taste like anything tbh so I never saw the point in paying extra just to have them on my desserts.

Honestly, have you ever crashed a party before?  Nah. I cringe thinking about that.

Do you know how to do the moon walk?  I don’t.

Has anybody ever told you that you have a good singing voice?  Never gotten that specific compliment before because I know I don’t have one.

Onion rings or french fries?  Onion rings.

Has anybody ever described you as a heart breaker? No.

Has anybody ever told you that you talk too fast?  I don’t think so, but I know I have the tendency to do so occasionally, especially while I’m presenting a deck. Once I notice it I make an effort to pace myself.

Who is the best cook that you know?  My dad and both my grandmas all deserve that title.

Which meal throughout the day do you skip the most?  I literally never have lunch ever.

What’s the largest amount that you can juggle at one time?  I can’t juggle.

What was your favorite thing to go on at the playground as a kid?  Sandboxes, since I liked the texture; the sandboxes in school were also often empty, which worked well for my introvert self. I find that it’s carried over to today, since I still enjoy touching things like slime and kinetic sand.

Do you know how much you weighed at birth? How much?  I think 5 or 6 lbs, I’m not exactly sure but it’s definitely somewhere in that small range.

Which aspect of your daily routine takes the most time? What do you do?  Work, for sure. I work a normal 9–6 so that’s already 8 hours out of my day, but I also OT a lot after hours, and I work throughout my lunch break as well so that technically makes it 9 hours. I also like getting up earlier and starting some work before my shift so that I would have less tasks on my plate for the day.

Do you enjoy buying gifts for others, or could you do without this?  I LOVE getting people gifts. Food is especially my love language, and I always get food delivery for my friends, family, and my team at work.

What is one thing you are expected to do, if anything?  I mean, I have work deadlines tomorrow so there’s that.

How do you tend to view driving? Monotonous or entertaining?  I love driving. I don’t think I ever complained about having to do it. It’s calming and relaxing when I’m doing it alone or with a partner; and it can be entertaining with the right set of people.

Do you enjoy talking about music with others? Not always. If I don’t listen to the artist then I can find the conversation quite boring, like if my friends would get into a full-blown discussion about Taylor Swift.

Is acting something you enjoy?  No. It wouldn’t even be something I’d be interested in doing.

When do you feel most accomplished?  Finishing a work day with no tasks left behind.

Do you think Manwich is amazing or completely gross?  Idk what that is.

How many best friends do you have?  Two.

Are you a smoker, drinker, pothead or none of the above?  I drink sometimes. I also kinda smoke, I guess.

If you have your ears pierced, when did you get them pierced?  My mom had them pierced when I was a month old.

Do you own any exercise machines?  My mom has this rowing equipment thingy. I don’t have any of my own, though.

On Facebook, do you have people listed as your siblings who aren’t really your siblings?  No.

Have you ever drawn or painted a self-portrait?  I remember having to draw one as a school assignment, but I’m pretty sure I half-assed that because I couldn’t care less for art class back then.

Who was your last voicemail from?  We don’t have voicemails.

Have you ever been falsely accused of something serious?  I don’t think so. That’s the sort of situation that would stick out in my memory if ever.

Did you ever set up a lemonade stand when you were a kid?  No, not a thing here.

When was the last time you spoke to someone in a different language?  Around an hour ago when I went downstairs and chatted with my sister briefly.

Have you ever received an anonymous gift?  Nope.

Have you ever camped out somewhere for an event the next day?  Nope but I definitely still wouldn’t be opposed to doing that haha.

When were you the saddest in your life? 2016 was fucking miserable. < I’d have to agree. 2017 was also awful.

Do you know anyone, personally, who is in an abusive relationship? Are you?  I used to know one but she got out of it. In a sense, I suppose I also was in one.

If you have siblings, have they moved out or do they still live with you?  Well they’re younger, so they definitely still live here, with our parents. I’m the first one expected to move out, but I’m taking my time.

Have you ever gotten searched by the cops?  No.

Do you like fried rice?  Of course. I like any kind of rice.

What was the last thing you drank?  Water.

[pixie88]

Summer Love

Chapter 2 - TNA - After the Wedding.

A/N: I’m editing all my fanfiction and tidy up my tumblr account. Correcting mistakes and shorting chapters down. Sorry if you have already read this. Let me know if you would like to be tagged!

Find previous chapters HERE under The Nanny Affair - After the Wedding.

Word count: 3489 Sorry that was the shortened down version too. The OG was 5000!

WARNINGS: ⚠️ Some adult language ans sexual content.

Disclaimer: Characters are property of Pixelberry.

Pairings: M!Sam x MC - Olive.

Enjoy 😘

10 years ago

"Jenny, do you have to go? Who am I going to hang out with all summer?" "Olive, You have loads of friends not just me. Plus, you will be busy with your summer job! Promise me one thing make sure Jace turns up on time, please" I sigh, "OK, I will but it won't be the same without you!" I hug her as we stood outside her mom's car.

"I will be back before you know it" Jenny, mom beeps the horn. Jen smiles at me "Right, I have to go see you in a few weeks! Love you" "Have fun! Say Hi to your Nan for me. See you soon! Love ya Jen!" She gets into the car and waves as her mom drives off.

I hear Jenny's front door close and footsteps coming down the stairs, " "Hey, I'm off to meet some mates. Laters" I grab his arm, and he turns to me "Olive, what are you doing?" "Have you forgotten? We are both due to start work in 20 minutes" "Olive, you didn't really think I was going to stick to my mom's deal and go to that job did you?" "Poor Jace, your mom spoke to me last night, and she asked me to tell her if you don't turn up" I smiled at him.

"So! What is she going to do if I don't? Ground me?!" he laughs. "No, nothing like that she's just hidden your car keys so you can't use it for that concert you want to go to at the end of summer" he looks surprised. "What?! No, she hasn't! She can't do that!" "She has! We are going to be late," he sighs, "Fine, let's go!" We take the subway to my Uncle Pete's bar and restaurant as we get there. We walk round the back to let ourselves in.

Uncle Pete is waiting for us "Olive! Jace always a pleasure to see you. Right you two your Tallulah's t-shirts are there in the box in the corner. Get change in the toilet's. I'll probably start you both off with taking out meals until the washing up starts piling up. We both heads over to pick up a shirt" "Hey Pete, Do you have a large?" Jace asks, "No, sorry not at the moment I need to order some more." We go to get changed, once I'm done I head to the kitchen Jace isn't far behind me, when he enters the kitchen I nearly fall to the floor laughing.

"OK, it's not funny, Olive" "Really because I think it's hilarious! You look like you might Hulk out of it!" "OK, Olive have you finished?" "Sorry, I'm just getting started Jace" Uncle Pete comes into the kitchen and takes one look at Jace and tries to hide a laugh.

"Great, you managed to squeeze into it" I head off to the stock room and grab what we and take them back to the kitchen.

Jace has rolled out the pizza base and spinning it around his hand above his head "OK, no one likes a show off Jace" "Aww, Olive are you jealous you can't do th..." he's cut off by the dough landed flat on his face. I howl laughing "Wow, I'm so jealous" "Jace you have to get a new ball of dough now" Uncle Pete tells him.

Once we are finished, we take the meals out to the table we make a start on the washing up Jace washes and I dry up. By the end of our shift we are both drained "Argh, My feet are going to fall off!" "Well, if they do, I'm not carrying you home" I playfully slap him "Thanks! Such a gentleman!" We both laugh and get our stuff to head home.

2 Week's later I'm getting ready for work when my mom call's up to me "Bubble, Jace is here for you" "OK, Mom I will be down in a minute. A lot has changed in the last two weeks, the first few days I had to keep knocking for Jace to make sure he turned up work, then by the end of the week he started calling for me. He has actually been really sweet we've been chatting outside work too.

I've spoken to Jenny a few times, she's having fun with her Nan in Wilmington, North Carolina. I head downstairs to meet Jace "Hey, are you ready to go?" He asks me "Yep, Bye Mom! I'll see you later!" "See you later Bubble!" she shouts back as we head out.

We make our way to work via the subway, as soon as we get there we have a table of 30 so, We start on the washing up "Olive, can you turn on the tap I need more water." I reach for the tap and turn it on as I do a plate is in the way and the water splashes all over Jace.

He is soaked. I can't help laughing at him, "So, you think it's funny do you Olive?" Crap I have no where to run I'm trapped and Jace is blocking my only way out. He swipes the water in the sink at me, I try to cover myself, but it's no use I'm drenched, Jace is laughing, so I get him back swiping water at him.

We are both soaked "Give up, Olive!" both of us still splashing water at each other "No, not till you do," I'm not completely sure how it happened but Jace's lips are on mine at first I'm shocked. His hands move to my hips to lift the bottom of my shirt up when the kitchen door opens we spring apart it's Sarah.

"Sorry guys more washing up" "Thanks Sarah. Is it still busy out there?" I ask, "It is quieting down now, thank god! I have a few more plates to bring in, so I'll be back in a minute." she's left the kitchen Jace has continued washing up not looking at me this is how the rest of our shift together went in silence.

"Walk home together?" he asked. "Yeah OK!" "I think we need to talk about earlier!" We leave "So, about earlier. What was that?" He asks, "I don't know, I have no idea what happened. One minute we were messing about the next we were kissing." "How do you feel about kissing me?" "It was nice. What about you?" "Me? I've wanted to kiss you for ages." He smiles.

"No, I'm not I'm being serious. I figured you didn't see me as anything other than your best friend's brother. So I gave up trying!" "So, what if we start again?" He smiles at me as we reach my house "So if I was to ask you on a date tomorrow night you would say...?" "I would say pick me up at 7pm" "OK, see you tomorrow at 7!" He smirks at me as I head into the house.

The next evening I'm getting ready to go on my date with Jace when I hear a knock at the door, "Come on lets go!" I say pulling Jace along with me.

We take the subway to the bowling alley and change our shoe once we get there. "Lovely foot wear, very on trend!" "You can make fun of me all you want, but at least I don't look like I have clown feet." I laugh. He turns to me "You know what they say about big feet." He winks at me "Yeah, I do, they have massive heads!" "HEY!" he says with a giggle. "Let's play. By the way I play to win!" "Is there any other way?" we start playing Jace gets a strike on his first go.

We leave the bowling alley we start to walk home when we come across a street performer playing a guitar as I'm about to walk passed him, Jace grabs my hand and starts dancing with me. "Jace!" He spins me out then back towards him, I laugh! "I love your laugh, Olive." I look up at him as I snake my arms around the back of his neck, his eyes meet mine, then flit down to my lips. His lips crash against and he deepens the kiss, his tongue dances around mine.

He pulls away and smirks at me, "Come on lets get you home before your parents send out a search party!" He drops me back home as soon as I get in I head to bed when I hear my phone.

PING

*1 New Message From Jace*

[Night beautiful! I've had the best night, can't wait to do it again! Jace x]

[Aww! Jace, I had an amazing time too. Definitely doing it again. ;) Sweet dreams xx]

A few week later one Saturday, it's dad's birthday, he's having a BBQ with family and friends coming over even Jace and his parents are coming. I'm helping mom with the salad when I hear him "Hi Olive, you look nice today!" I turn to him "Thank you," he smiles at me and looks over to my mom who has her back towards us then plants a quick kiss on my lips.

I blush as he pulls away.

"Do you need any help Mrs. Schuyler?" He asks not taking his eyes away from mine, "Oh, thanks Jace, but we are all done now!" Mum tells him as she takes the salad out to the garden.

Jace wrapped his arms around me "I've missed you," he tells me, "You only saw me last night!" I say before he plants another kiss on my lips. We hear someone heading in, so we spring apart as dad comes into the kitchen, "Hey, Jace" "Happy birthday Mr. Schuyler! "Thanks, you guys coming outside?" "Yeah, we were just heading out there." We both join everyone in the garden.

Later dad and uncle Pete are deep in conversation I look over to Jace, who is already looking over to me and nod towards the house. We sneak inside, and I grab his hand, and lead him to my bedroom, but he stops me on the stairs "Olive, I don't think this is a good idea! Your dad will do his nut if he catches us!" "He's busy! Pete will keep him busy for ages. Plus, all I wanted to do was show you Jenny's birthday present I've been working on!".

He hesitates, but follows me as he comes into my bedroom, I close my door, and he looks around "I've not been in here since I was 8" I laugh, "yeah, dad kinda doesn't let me have boys in here!" He looks worried "Don't worry he won't catch you in here! Come on sit while I get out her present." he sits at the end of my bed while I find Jenny's present, I sit next to him. "So what is it?" I pull the photo album out of the bag.

"It's a photo album with pictures from when we were kids right up to recent ones we've taken" we flick through the album. "Olive, she's going to love this! Such a lovely idea!" He smiles at me "I'm clever, aren't I?" I wink at him before I can react, he starts tickling me and I collapse backwards and start moving up the bed to get away, but it's no good! "Jace" I laugh then he stops as he is hovering above me looks at my lips "You are so beautiful, Olive."

I loop my hands around his neck and pull him in for a kiss. He deepens the kiss, then his hands slide up the side of my leg and under my top to my breast. He pulls away a little "Is this OK?" I nod as I pull him back to me and slide my hand under his shirt feeling his abs, and he smiles against my lips.

I move my hands to his back, and he presses against me more as I bite his lip he groans, he moves his lips to my neck "Jace!" I moan, and he continues kissing down to my collarbone. I pull him back up to my lips, then lift his shirt to take it off he looks at me as I pull it over his head "Olive, we should stop!" "I don't want to!"  his lips smash against mine his tongue plays with mine.

He pulls up again "Olive, I've never...you know! I've done stuff just not that" I cup his face "Jace, Me neither!" "Are you sure?" I nod, it's like something breaks in him because he doesn't hold back or fight it anymore.

He starts to undress me until we are both down to our underwear. He pulls back to look at me "Wow, you look absolutely stunning! Olive" "Stop looking at me and show me how stunning you think I am!". He collapses against me, his hand slides down my body and stop between my legs before he slips into my underwear.

He starts stoking me"ohhh...Jace!" he whispers against my ear "Olive, you're going to have to be quiet unless you want your dad to kill me!" I smirk as he nips my ear lobe. "Also tell me if it's uncomfortable," he says,"Oh, believe it's anything but!" This spurs him on more as he runs his teeth gently against my neck before pulling my bra out of the way to suck my nipple.

Every touch makes me tingle "Jace, I need more!" I bring his lips back to mine to hide my moans. He starts to kiss down my body "Jace, where are you going?" He looks up at me "Just lay back," he says before planting a kiss inside my thigh then his tongue brushes against me "Jace....oh! That feels..." his tongue slide inside me and I struggle not to scream with pleasure.

I pull him up to me,"My turn!" I tell him as I push him against the bed and start kissing his neck and down his body as I reach his boxers, he shudders as I pull them down. He's hard, I take him in my hand as I lick the tip he lets out a small groan, I smirk as I take him into my mouth, his hips buck upwards as I slide my tongue around him.

He grabs the bed sheets, clenching his fist as he bites his lip, trying hard not to moan aloud. He places his hand behind my head, guiding me "Olive....." moving me faster along him and it's not long before he pulls me up pushing me against the bed.

"Olive, are you sure about this? I won't regret this, but I don't want you to either," I smile at him "I'm sure! Condoms top draw, on your left" He leans over, opens the draw pulls out the condom packet, and places one on himself before hovering above me again "If it becomes uncomfortable, tell me, and we'll stop! OK?" "I will," I smile at him.

He positions himself at my entrance as he kisses my lips just before he enters me. I wrap my arms around him. He pulls his lips away to look at me keeping, his eye on mine as he starts off slow,"Jace more," he starts to speed up, each thrust more powerful than the last.

His gaze finally leaves mine as he leans in to kiss my neck, he groans against it "Olive.....ohhhhh!" I smirk "Shhh!" His lips come to meet mine to muffle out our moans, I dig my nails into his back, and he bites my lip.

My hands move to his bum, pushing him down to deepen his thrusts he gets the hint and goes harder "Ohh...god...that's deep!" "Jace I...I want to be on top!" he flips us over until I'm straddling him.

I start riding him "Fuck me, Olive! Shit....I'm going to come!" I start to ride him harder bringing myself to the edge, and we both fall over it together! I collapse next to him panting, I turn to him, he's smiling at me "Olive, that was..." "Amazing, incredible or unbelievable?" He plants a kiss on my lips "all three!" He says.

Just then there a knock at the door both of us look at each other in shock, Jace gets up grabbing his clothes scrambling to put them on as the door open I wrap the blanket around me and mom walks in she catches Jace in just his pants.

"WHOA!!" Mom screams as she closed the door again, averting her eyes, she closes it enough to not see anything but also enough to talk to me "Olive, I just came up to tell your Uncle has booked a weekend away for me and your dad for his birthday we leave in a bit and won't be back till Monday. I was going to ask if you are ok to leave you on your own or if you wanted a friend to stay, but I guess you can ask Jace if you want? As long as you are being safe?"

"Oh mom, that's cool. Safe?" "Yes, Olive safe as in using protection!" "MOM!!" We weren't doing anything I was just changing and....and...." "Bubble you don't need to explain, you are 17 nearly 18 years old. But don't tell your dad, I've said it's OK for him to stay!" No point trying to deny it, there isn't one excuse I could use that to cover this up!

"OK, mom just don't tell dad about what just happened." "I have no idea what you are talking about, but I'd advise you to get dressed and come down to say bye to your dad before he comes up!" "OK". I start getting dressed as I hear mom heading back downstairs.

Jace comes over to me "So a weekend with a free house? What ever will we do?" Jace winks at me. I smirk at him "Hopefully more of that, but right now you need to play hide and seek and hope to god my dad doesn't catch you!" "OK, I'll text my mom tell her I went to a mates and I'm staying there tonight." "Right, I shouldn't be long see you in a bit!" I tell him before going to say bye to my parents.

"Bye bubble, make sure he wraps up!" She whispers as she pulls away I blush. I wave them off as they leave, mom has done all the clearing up from the BBQ. I head back to my bedroom as I open the door, I call out for Jace and before I can react he tackles me onto the bed.

Over the next 24 hours we only leave my bed for food or the bathroom. It's now Monday lunch time my mom and dad will be back tonight. We are laying in bed kissing when my phone rings "Crap, it's Jenny!" Jace smirks.

I answer the phone "Hey, Jenny! How have you been?" I ask her thinking Jace will stop as I start talking to his sister, but he doesn't, he continues kissing along my jaw, "Olive, I'm great thanks only 1 more week till I'm back! Have you missed me? Do you have any juicy gossip?" She asks me as Jace starts to nibble my ear lobe then moves to neck before "Erm.....no...no gossip sorry. Yeah, I've missed you too! How is your Nan?".

He moves further down my body "Aww Olive! BFF should never be apart this long. Next time Jace can be the one that...." I don't hear the rest of the sentence because his mouth is pressed against my centre "Ohhhhhhh....." I cry out before hearing Jenny again "Olive, are you OK? Did you hear what I said?" Jace looks up at me and presses his finger against his lip to shh me before he's spreading my legs wider to give him better access.

I try to focus "Yeah, yeah, Jen, I'm OK, I just stubbed my toe." "Ouch I bet that's painful! So, what do you think?" She asks. I want to ask what she is on about, but I can't focus "Yeah, it's a great idea! Jenny, can I call you back? I've got to clean up before my parents come back tonight".

"Ohhh...yes!" I say as Jace doubles his efforts "Great, I can't wait! Yeah, of course! Olive, are you sure you are OK?" "Yeah, I just found $50 in my jean pocket" lame excuse, but it's all I could think of. "OK, we'll speak soon!" She says, "Soon, bye!" I say before hanging up.

Jace comes up "Couldn't keep quiet could you?" He smirks against my lips. I pull him tighter to me before he pins my hands about my head as he takes me again.

A week later Jenny is back, and we were going tell her about us, but with Jace off to university and me still in high school neither of us could see how it would work. Sadly, we call it a day and never mention it again.

Continue reading this story here - Chapter 3.

@lem-20​

[femvimes]

Notes from the Script Book (episodes 1-3)

I got the Nice and Accurate Script Book and proceeded to take copious notes of things that weren’t in the show, or illuminating ways that Neil wrote things. It’s SUPER interesting but I took a lot of notes, so see them under the cut:

Introduction:

In a 1991 movie script for GO that Terry and Neil wrote, the producers pressured them into writing that Aziraphale worked at the British Museum and that Crowley OWNED A NIGHT CLUB. How’s that for an AU

Neil knew from the start that he wanted Aziraphale and Crowley to be the main characters

“I think it’s fair to assume that if, at any time in the last 6,000 years, anything interesting happened anywhere on Earth, Crowley and Aziraphale were probably there, not doing whatever it is they were actually sent there to do” (It is a gift, a gift to the foes of Mordor fanfiction writers)

Episode One:

Crowley originally hisses the “lead balloon” line unintelligibly while in snake form

Crowley’s wings are grey (why? this is super interesting to me)

Aziraphale “thinks tartan is nifty, and would use the word nifty with pride”

Aziraphale and Crowley originally had extra introduction scenes. In his, Crowley uses an army of rats to bring down the London mobile network. Then he tells them to, and I quote, “stay cool”.

Crowley runs from police in the script (like in the book) and uses RATS to sabotage their engine

One thing I was confused about in the show - Satan interrupts the radio to tell Crowley his work on the M25 was a stroke of genius, but it doesn’t sound like Ben. I think it’s actually a Freddie Mercury impersonator to make it sound like Satan is talking to him through Freddie Mercury (which is also in the book)

Crowley’s M25 Powerpoint originally happens in episode one, and in the script when he says his fateful “Can I hear a wahoo” everyone mumbles “Hail the Great Beast, Devourer of Worlds”, which is imo not nearly as funny as the non-reaction in the show

Thaddeus Dowling is a “presidential hopeful”

THE PRESIDENT IS LITERALLY BUSH IN THE SCRIPT

Like in the book, Crowley kills a duck at St. James’s Park, Aziraphale gives him the “really, my dear” line and Crowley brings the duck back to life. (I would sacrifice, like, the tip of a finger to hear Aziraphale call him “my dear” just ONCE)

Although the show never explains why Pestilence was replaced by Pollution, Crowley and Aziraphale discuss it in the park. All the Four Horsemen also have longer introductory scenes, but I’m glad they were cut because they don’t add a lot

Before Crowley and Aziraphale get drunk, they have “spent a very pleasant day together”

Aziraphale’s regency silver snuff box obsession was in the script, but dropped from the show

When Aziraphale starts to agree with Crowley, he’s described as “coming over to the dark side”, starting a trend of hinting at Aziraphale’s Fall and personally killing me, Tumblr user femvimes

Nanny!Crowley is “sexy and domineering”. Snerk.

Crowley and Aziraphale sit next to each other on the bus in 2012

The part that everyone says David and Michael improvised with the magic trick is in the script. So I’m not sure what part of the scene was improvised. Maybe the blocking?

Crowley appears to be “in charge” of the caterers at the birthday party

There’s an extended sequence at the party where Warlock fires a gun (like in the book) that got cut in favor of the food fight

Crowley brings the dove back to life by snapping his fingers

Aziraphale swears by saying “sugar” which was probably an amazing running gag which culminated in him losing his cool and dropping the f-bomb

Crowley told Hell he invented the CIA torture practices (woof)

Episode Two:

Stage direction: “the plants are terrified. No, I don’t know how we show this on television either.” I like to think that behind each plant in that shot is a production assistant shaking it.

Aziraphale brings shortbread on their trip to Tadfield

Crowley and Aziraphale both ask each other if the other side will give them asylum. (This foreshadowing is comin’ in hot, folks)

The scene where Aziraphale and Crowley get shot by paint balls was meant to be “shot like a war film”. WE WERE ROBBED

Crowley “gestures” to make the paint go away. Yeah, huh, he, uh, sure “gestures” in the gayest way possible

The full wall body slam is in the stage direction (Neil I REALLY want to know ur reasoning here)

“Aziraphale is rather enjoying having the upper hand in the ideas department”

Crowley tells Aziraphale at one point “Dude. Chill.”

Episode Three:

In Rome, there’s a few lines that get cut where Crowley buys Aziraphale his glass of wine

When Aziraphale agrees to the coin toss in the Globe, he “falls”. (I just can’t. I can’t anymore)

When Aziraphale sees Crowley in the Nazi Church scene, he’s “realizing they are still friends”. KILL ME

This seemed relevant, because I’ve watched the scene so many times: In 1967, Aziraphale opens the car door, delivers his “don’t look so disappointed” line and presumably exits the car after the “you go too fast for me” line. I prefer the blocking they kept (obviously) because it makes him seem more reluctant to leave

ALSO: after Aziraphale leaves the Bentley, a neon halo flashes on and off above his head. (WHY? did they cut all the references to Aziraphale Falling? This is all I want!)

More that got cut: some not-great jokes about Mme. Tracy’s sex work (thank God someone reined Neil in, ‘cause yikes)

We have one (1) Dear Boy: Aziraphale calls Shadwell that in their phone conversation

[darthrena]

(Your Kisses) Taste like Come what May

Excerpt:

"I promise you will love her.  She's funny, smart, absolutely gorgeous--Just one date is all I am asking."

"What has gotten into you all of a sudden.  Is this girl on the run from ICE or something?"

"Armie asked me to marry him."

Ben felt his world collapsing.  His mild amusement long forgotten under the weight of a thousand unspoken words, missed opportunities, and imagined confessions.

Rose's voice seemed to come from far away.  "Ben?  Aren't you going to say anything?"

Ben swallowed, forced his throat to produce sounds other than screaming, or worse, a sob.  Oddly, when his mouth felt capable of speech, it was a faint rasp, no hint of the tempest which roiled within.  "Congratulations.  You deserve to be happy."

o-o-o-o-o-o

Summary:

Ben, Rose and Hux grew up together.  Ben loves Rose, but Rose and Hux are together.  After Rose and Hux become engaged, Rose tries to set Ben up with her friend Rey.  He reluctantly agrees to go on a date.

In honor of nearing the end of this fic, I’m posting this on tumblr.

Chapter 1

"I promise you will love her.  She's funny, smart, absolutely gorgeous--Just one date is all I am asking."

The setting sun played havoc with Ben's view of the upcoming exit, and he pulled the sun shield with his left hand, letting Rose's chatter wash over him with only half his attention.  As usual, Rose's feet were propped on the dashboard, clad in adorable Ghibli themed socks.  For an offense Ben would have happily removed the feet of any other perpetrator who dared place feet upon his Audi, as was typical where Rose was concerned, Ben merely felt his eyes crinkle in a fond smile.  They were on their way to meet friends at a family style Brazilian restaurant in Framingham for Hux's birthday.  Hux was coming straight from the office to meet them there, while Ben and Rose had attended to picking up wine and the birthday cake before hitting the road.  Unfortunately, the conversation had trended toward Rose's sudden favorite topic over the past week--namely Ben's singleness.

Recognizing that Rose, a veritable force of nature when she put her mind to it, would be unlikely to drop the topic without some kind of response, Ben inquired lightly, "What has gotten into you lately?  Is this girl on the run from ICE or something?"

"Armie asked me to marry him."  Rose gave a deliberate pause.  "Tonight we plan tell everyone."

Ben felt his world collapsing.  His mild amusement long forgotten under the weight of a thousand unspoken words, missed opportunities, and imagined confessions.

Rose's voice seemed to come from far away.  "Ben?  Aren't you going to say anything?"

Ben swallowed, forced his throat to produce sounds other than screaming, or worse, a sob.  Oddly, when his mouth felt capable of speech, it was a faint rasp, no hint of the tempest which roiled within.  "Congratulations.  You deserve to be happy."

"Thank you."  Rose was smiling softly, golden and glowing in the setting sun.  Her shoulder nudged his playfully, but a touch of sorrow lingered beneath the levity and made him clench his fists around the wheel.  "So do you, you know."  Injecting her voice with a determined cheerfulness, Rose continued, "You're my best friend, well you and Armie.  I'll make a big fuss if I don't see you even happier than me.  You won't like it.  Safest thing is to go along with my plans."

"We wouldn't want that," Ben drawled, almost able to imbue his tone with his usual dryness, rather than any of the anguish scrabbling for purchase on the inside.  "And you're so sure that Rey is going to make that happen?"

"You won't know until you meet her."  Rose's eyes crinkled in a mischievous smile, the smile that made him fall in love so many years ago.  "And I won't stop bugging you until you do."

o-o-o-o-o-o

It was just a date.

One date to satisfy Rose, his best friend, the woman he loved, unfortunately, and likely always would, in some way.  One date, and then he could tell Rose that he gave it his best shot, but that they just weren't suited to one another.  Perhaps then Rose would back off and leave Ben to being quite happy alone.

According to Rose, Rey was a third year PhD candidate at MIT, so Ben suggested a restaurant in Cambridge for their date.  While the city wasn't necessarily any less crowded on a Thursday night, Ben hoped that the university-visiting-tourists would at least prefer to find dinner in Boston and he wouldn't be fighting for a parking space all evening.

Approximately 20 minutes before their dinner reservation saw Ben perched on the more artistic-than-comfortable barstool, feeling a bit like an overgrown bird as he sipped from a craft beer.

It had been more than two years since Ben had been on a proper date, and the weight of this inexperience left him feeling unaccountably nervous, despite his intention for the date to not succeed.  Apart from the occasional drink with colleagues or get-together’s with friends of friends which at times had led to taking a woman home, and the "serious" girlfriend he dated in college, Ben had been comfortably single for most of his adult life.  He had never tried Tinder, or any other dating App for that matter.  Although Hux and Rose enjoyed ribbing him for the fact, Ben was just shy of a luddite.  Despite owning a perfunctory cell phone, he used it solely for making phone calls and texting, preferred handwriting his notes and sending the occasional letter to his mother, and his laptop saw little more use than Microsoft word and email, any skills above which Ben deferred to his resigned, 20-something secretary, Kaydel.

"Ben?" A soft, accented voice drew him upward with embarrassing alacrity, so his knees bumped the bar table with a wince-inducing impact.

Shit, she was beautiful.

A kind face, with charmingly arched brows and high cheekbones, only minimally made up in neutral tones, as far as Ben could tell, but for a sensual pinkish red lip.  Rey was dressed simply, but to elegant affect in a moss green sweater dress with a high neckline and bell sleeves, over tall, heeled black boots.  She was taller than Rose, with a small waist he could span with both hands, and modest curves compared to Rose's voluptuous form.  Fuck, stop thinking about Rose.  Her dress seemed to bring out the specks of bright green from her hazel eyes, currently crinkled under his inspection.

"Hi," he heard himself reply, hand fortunately outstretched in the normal human greeting.  "I'm Ben.  Well I guess you already knew that."  Smooth.

Rey's lips twitched a smile as she accepted the gesture, her hand feeling small and callused within his own.  "It's lovely to meet you, Ben."

o-o-o-o-o-o

Seated at a table cozily situated toward the back of the restaurant, far enough from the bar so that the rumble of voices receded to a pleasant murmur, but not within spitting distance of the restrooms, Ben felt some of his earlier tension relax as they went through the motions of ordering and basic small talk.

After clearing his throat to draw her attention, he ventured, "I heard from Rose you are an engineer.  What is your specialty?"

"Mechanical engineer.  My research is in material science.  I've always liked getting my hands dirty, but my current research is a lovely blend of both practical applications and theory.  That's sort of how Rose and I met years ago.  I was lucky enough to tag along with my undergraduate mentor to a conference she had been giving a talk.  I loved everything about it and was inspired to my current line of research.  Then a couple months back I ran into her at a Society of Women Engineers event in Boston and we hit it off."

Ben raised two brows, suitably impressed.  He had not heard this part of their backstory.  "Wow.  That sounds like a duo's origin story."

There was a twinkle in Rey's hazel eyes as she sipped from her Merlot.  "Or the start of a rom-com."

Not pausing to consider the implications of that statement, Ben countered with a affected pondering look, "You are forgetting about Hux though.  Perhaps it's a romantic tragedy."

"Romantic thriller."

"Are you planning anything nefarious to rid yourself of Hux?"

Rey made a scoffing sound.  "I admit nothing!  Actually, you are an attorney.  Will this conversation be under attorney client privilege?"

Ben made a slight smile, "Not that kind of attorney, I'm afraid."

"What kind are you then?"

"Corporate law.  Mostly contracts and liquidations."  At Rey's polite smile, Ben couldn't help but laugh.  "I can see your eyes glazing over from here."

"Sorry," came Rey's sheepish reply.  "Was it that obvious?"

Ben grinned.  "A little, but I am used to it I suppose."

"So why corporate law then?"

"I come from a family of attorneys actually, my mother, uncle and grandfather.  But since I have never been much of an orator, being a trial attorney wasn't for me.  Corporate law, or at least my work, has a more collaborative aspect, with different parties coming to agreements in an often uncontentious way.  I like coming to resolutions, the satisfaction of problem solving."

Rey met his eyes over the table, a warm smile curving those lovely lips.  "We are not so different in that."

God, she was beautiful.  And charming.  And too good for him.  

Shit, he liked her.

The thought overwhelmed him suddenly.  And with it, an unreasoning panic bubbled through him.

Seized with the irrational desire to put a stop to whatever was happening, Ben broke away from her gaze to focus on an elaborate lighting piece of copper piping and yellow filament bulbs above Rey's head.

"Look, Rey," Ben began, after taking a generous sip of his craft beer, already feeling awkward.  "You seem like a really great person, so I need to be honest with you.  Rose sort of guilted me into this, but I'm not really looking for a relationship right now."

For a moment, a look of devastation crossed her lovely features, before turning quickly into a neutral expression, the change so fast that Ben almost thought he imagined it.  Rey let out a light chuckle, while eyeing her wine glass with a deliberately pondering look.  "Have you noticed that nothing auspicious has ever followed the statement, 'you seem like a really great person'?".   Ignoring the flush that Ben felt heating his neck and ears, Rey met his gaze with a gentle smile.  "It's alright Ben.  My feelings aren't hurt.  A bit disappointed perhaps.  You have feelings for Rose, don't you?"

Ben took a few moments to sip from his beer, as he considered his response.  Strangely, her forthrightness, rather than provoking defensiveness, compelled his own.  "Longer than I should." he found himself admitting softly.  "Disappointed how?"

Rey smiled demurely before taking a small bite of her chicken piccata.  "I was hoping to take you home tonight."

His throat was very dry.  "I see."

This was a bad idea.  Terrible, in light of his earlier realization.

"My car is a block away."

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Oh fuck."

Rey had a lovely speaking voice, one given to laughter and spontaneous song.  He thought so the moment he heard it.  He thought it was even lovelier as a breathy moan, gasping in accompaniment to the obscene squelching of his cock ramming into her unbelievably tight pussy and crooning words that set his blood aflame.  "Baby, that's so good.  Your cock fills me so well."

Ben grunted, feeling himself harden even more at her words, if that was possible, and reached down to get a handful of her lovely tits.  Her nipples were pink, he recalled, dusky and freckled when he removed the sheer black lace bra.  Rey had been wearing matching panties, musky and drenched in slick when he mouthed at her mound, though she had quickly divested them so he could bury his face in her cunt.

"Ben Ben.  G-God I'm close.  Ben, don't stop!"  Rey was babbling in time to his thrusts.

The teal alarm clock and cat figurine above her mantel began to tip precariously as he upped the power of his thrusts, hitting that spot inside her which would bring her to the edge.  She was an exquisite sight--svelte, tanned legs and tawny, freckled back, pert derrière and pink lips above and below, the latter of which currently enraptured him, as he watched his cock disappear within her.  The part of Ben not consumed with Rey clenching around his cock, thought idly that he hoped MIT invested in sound proof walls for graduate housing otherwise her neighbors were getting an earful.

The state of Rey's unfortunate neighbors was soon forgotten when Rey let out a choked scream as her climax descended, her cunt taking a vice-like grip on his cock and setting off his own orgasm.  Waves of pleasure undulated through him, and into Rey in spurts of cum.  Ben was never one to talk during sex, but a hoarse "Fuck," was wrenched from him.  Lost to ecstasy, he ground his hips to her, hands gripping smooth hips in a bruising grasp.

As he came down from his high, Ben pulled himself gingerly from her body, aware that she must be at a uncomfortable position, and found his gaze fixated on her pink pussy lips, swollen and dripping with his spend.  His cock twitched valiantly at the sight.

Rey was shifting on the bed, turning to face him, and it was her lovely tits and even lovelier hazel eyes that filled his vision, along with her lips quirked in amusement.  "See something you like?"

Ben glanced between his dick and her breasts.  "Maybe in thirty minutes."

An inelegant snort met this statement, and then Rey was doubled over in giggles, nose scrunched adorably in a manner which took ten years off her, despite the circumstances.  Ben felt his own expression ease into a grin in the face of such infectious laughter, and could only watch in amused tolerance as she jumped to her feet spritely, pulling on a faded Radiohead t-shirt from off the floor before flashing him a conspiratorial grin.

"My roommate is attending a conference for the next three days, so we have the place to ourselves.  You want to order chicken wings and watch Netflix?"

How could he say no to that?  He promised Rose he would try, after all.

Also posted on AO3

[seofthours]

85 Questions

tagged by @1nomins and @wlwhyuck thank you <3

rules: answer all 85 questions then tag 20 people! 

♡ Last…? ♡

Drink - water

Phone call - I called my mom’s phone because she couldn’t find it :)

Text message - me telling my friend Seb that we were just gonna sneak away to Canada

Song you listened to - probably elevator by jonghyun // that has been on repeat lately

Time you cried - I don’t really know. I don’t cry that often. I almost cried when Spence posted New York

♡ Ever…? ♡

6. Dated someone twice - yep

7. Kissed someone and regretted it - yes // funny story,, I hung out with this guy because he was kinda cute and plus this other guy pissed me off. I added the guy who I was supposed to hang out with on snapchat so he could send me a picture of a rainbow that he had taken. Later that night, I was in the car with the guy I wasn’t dating but had been hanging out with. He took my phone and blocked rainbow dude. That ultimately pissed me off, so I added him back and we hung out a few days later. Rainbow guy pretty much gave me a choice of kissing him or being accused of being a lesbian. If you don’t know, I live in the south. Although I am pan, being accused of being gay here isn’t something I need. (I am not out btw) I ended up kissing him which pissed off guy I had been hanging out with. I regret kissing this guy for multiple reasons. whoops

8. Been cheated on - no but a guy I was dating told another girl that he loved her. His best friend made him tell me and when I didn’t react the way that they wanted me to, he broke up with me :)

9. Lost someone special - mmmm no?

10. Been depressed - I have asked for help with this, but guess who has yet to receive help. Good news is that I am 4 years clean since the beginning of May

11. Gotten drunk and thrown up - nope i prefer to just get tipsy

12. Fave colors - blue, pink, and yellow which is ironically the pan flag

♡ In the last year have you… ♡

15. Made new friends - yes uwu

16. Fallen out of love - sure I have

17. Laughed until you cried - All the time

18. Found out someone was talking about you - Yeah but it doesn’t happen often though. I tend to stray away from things that could get me talked about

19. Met someone who changed you - All of the people that I have met who are good have changed me for the better. 

20. Found out who your friends are - When I was in a wreck a couple months ago, I had been on the way to a birthday party. The only three people who came I consider friends except maybe one. When I was finally able to show up to the party, the birthday girl told me that she had guests to entertain and that she couldn’t just leave. 

21. Kissed someone on your FB friend list - probably. I don’t get on fb though

♡ General ♡

22. How many FB friends do you have irl - I don’t accept friend requests from people I don’t know

23. Do you have any pets? - We have two dogs, a cat, and a guinea pig

24. Do you want to change your name - no I am okay with my name

25. What did you do for your last bday - went to eat with some friends when I really should have gone out of town with my mom and sister like I originally intended

26. What time did you wake up today - like 11?

27. What were you doing at midnight lastnight? - only god knows aldalsdkjf

28. What is something you can’t wait for - to be employed again damn. I am broke

30. What are you listening to right now - my computer keys 

31. Have you ever talked to a person named tom - I? don’t? think so?

32. Something that gets on your nerves - assholes :)

33. Mosted visited sites - youtube and tumblr and google docs

34. Hair color - a light brown blonde with red? What would you call that?

35. Long or short hair - almost to my ass aldjfs

36. Do you have a crush on someone - I thought I did but I don’t think I feel that way toward her

37. What do you like about yourself - One of the things I’ve always liked about myself is that I don’t do the things that everyone else does. Lately, I have been following trends especially with my writing, so I am just trying to get back to my roots.

38. Want any piercings? - There was a time went I wanted a lip piercing because I was like “emo yes” but now I think I just want a second ear piercing

39. Blood type - o negative. I donate blood and the blood services sent me a card in the mail that said “you are o- so special”

40. Nicknames - emuwu, liky, cute demon, loly(pop), etc.

41. Relationship status - on the market // I like girls uwu

42. Zodiac - Aquarius sun, libra moon, Virgo rising

43. Pronouns - she/her

44. Fav tv shows - I don’t watch a lot of tv :/ it doesn’t hold my attention for long

45. Tattoos - no but I plan to get one

46. Right or left handed - right handed

47. Ever had surgery - no

48. Piercings - i just have my ears pierced

49. Sport - none currently but I played softball, did gymnastics, and cheered for a while

50. Vacations - I wanna go back to San Francisco :(

51. Trainers - ???

♡ More general ♡

52. Eating - cocktail peanuts

53. Drinking - water

54. I’m about to watch - nothing

55. Waiting for….. - people to stop sexualizing the dreamies :)

56. Want…. - to sleep 

57. Get married - once upon a time (watch me love a girl and them outlaw gays being married again)

58. Career - It changes a lot. I currently plan to major in journalism and then possibly segway into law school

♡ Which is better ♡

59. Hugs or kisses - both but kisses

60. Lips or eyes - eyes are great but l i p s

61. Short or taller - It isn’t that hard to be taller than me so I don’t really care

62. Older or younger - mm I think I could only go like a year younger

63. Nice arms or stomach - arms

64. Hookup or relationship - depends but a relationship 

65. Troublemaker or hesitant - troublemaker 

♡ Have you ever ♡

66. Kissed a stranger - no 

67. Drank hard liquor - I mean yeah but give me two months // nobody let me on tumblr during that time lkdfa

68. Lost glasses - I wear contacts

69. Turned someone down - yes a few times 

70. Sex on first date - nope

71. Broken someone’s heart - I want to say no but yes

72. Had your heart broken - eh

73. Been arrested - no 

74. Cried when someone died - yes

75. Fallen for a friend - unfortunately

♡ Do you believe in…? ♡

76. Yourself? - depends on the day

77. Miracles - sometimes // it’s a miracle that I didn’t step on that wasp earlier

78. Love at first sight - absolutely not

79. Santa claus - why is this a question?

80. Kiss on first date - if it happens, it happens

81. Angels - (I choked on Korin’s answer) yes and no 

♡ Other ♡

82. Best friend’s name - Seb the crab (inside joke) and my lovely A1 Dumbasses gc uwu

83. Eye color - hazel so like a green color with a caramel brown color in the center

84. Fave movie - 10 things i hate about you, how to lose a guy in 10 days, she’s all that, and mulan

85. Fave actor - mm no one in particular

I’m tagging: @wlwnohyuck @winwincity @morkleek @hyucksgalaxy @renjun-l @icetwea @wlwjisung @95s @hyuckbae @celestial-cosmosis @kkookies @softiejungwoo @angel-donghyuck @bumblebeesandcacti @tinybinnie @doyuwung sorry if you have already done this! <3

[bfseventeen]

Carat Day || Seventeen as Carats

This is not our usual boyfriend content, but we wanted to do something special for Carat Day so please enjoy!

Seungcheol:

the ultimate carat 

loves and supports seventeen with all of his heart 

goes to every single concert, meet up and fan sign event 

knows the fanchants by heart and probably yells them the loudest 

signs and raps along to every song 

really energetic on concerts 

has a lot of merch 

probably seventeen recognizes him 

really proud of them probably cried when they got their first win 

bias: chan 

ship: literally everyone

Jeonghan:

started to stan because of one fine day 

which explains his choice of bias 

probably skipped school at some point because seventeen dropped a mv 

watches fan theories but never tries to analyze them because that's too much 

stays up all night to watch fan cams 

has a tumblr page with very specific and short tags so it's really neat 

and you can find everything there 

you can search for seungcheol's hand and five pages will pop up 

goes on long hiatus and no one knows why because he never tells but irl he is just bored of posting and probably rewatches one fine day 

enjoys reading nsfw fics

bias: mingyu 

ship: mingyu and aji

Joshua:

does an acoustic cover of every single seventeen song

he has a youtube channel where he uploads videos talking about fanboy life

he also makes videos with hansol who has his own channel as well

they sometimes try to cover seventeen’s dances but not always succeed

he is enthusiastic about his rapping but no one tells him that he is not that good

his confidence cannot be stopped 

he feels attacked whenever hip hop unit curses in english 

but lowkey enjoys it

always asks on vlive from the members to speak in english

“you need jesus” - says whenever they do or say something perverted

bias: seokmin

ship: wonhui

Junhui

soft stan who does a lot of translating and subbing from korean to chinese

he does all the subbing by himself and he is very tired every time but he likes to work this much for other chinese fans who don’t understand korean

he is very active on twitter and he even tries to interact with his mutuals in english

whenever seventeen comes to china he just has to be there

literally never missed any chinese fan meeting or concert

when he meets the members on a fan signing event he tries to teach them each a word in chinese

he is just overall soft and friendly

bias: seungkwan - because he likes it how caring and funny he is

ship: the gag trio - they are just hilarious and junhui likes to laugh at them

Soonyoung:

new seventeen video out? doesn’t even take a day for him to upload a new dance tutorial video of their choreo

he likes to add his own style into the dance covers

people are telling him he could be an idol as well or a choreographer

he is part of a couple of dance crews

one time he danced to boomboom while wearing a mask

people thought he is an idol

does reaction videos to year end award show performances

he likes body roll movements a lot

both doing it and watching it 

bias: junhui - because of his dancing skills

ship: he is a sucker for China line

Wonwoo:

what is sleep and school in wonwoo’s life? 

he only knows gaming and fan fiction writing 

he is online 24/7 and he has different names for his gaming and blogging profile

on tumblr he goes by @/stanseventeen and he writes different aus with the members

he loves to put the members into mystery and fantasy genres 

he has many followers and they often ask him for advice on their daily lives

he is always asking them to go on variety shows

probably watched going seventeen episodes more than once

but when in real life he meets with kpop fans he becomes really shy

he even hides away the merches he has when he is in public

he is just an overall shy and soft stan

bias: hansol - because he really likes his funny side but also his laid-back style of rap

ship: he just loves verkwan because they are so silly and soft (and so real tbh) 

Jihoon:

is there for the music 

probably has every single version of their albums 

makes remixes of the songs and uploads them on his soundcloud 

a lot of people ask him about his bias but he always tells them that he doesn't have a personal favorite 

because obviously what matters to him is the music 

but secretly he has a soft spot for one of the members 

and because some carats know him from soundcloud they record him on a high touch event and they leak a footage of him almost passing out when seeing Jeonghan 

he also states that he doesn't do ships 

he does 

bias: jeonghan 

ship: jeongcheol

Seokmin:

that confused fan who never knows what’s going on

but is still supportive and loud af

he does a lot of song covers and he gets praised for his talent

even when he doesn’t understand what’s going on he is still laughing his ass off

he loves vocal unit he is really amazed by their talents

probably could win in high note battle against the members

he is always so nervous when he meets them during events

one time he cried so much seungcheol had to calm him down

he is a soft stan so when they are too exposed he wants to put a coat on them

when he goes outside he literally wears only seventeen merch

bias: jihoon obviously the producing legend with an angelic voice

ship: he is too pure for shipping 

Mingyu:

the artsy one, no surprise

he does digital, traditional, any kind of art of the members

his favorite style is chibi because it makes them even cuter

he sells his own art in stickers, key chains, and anything you can imagine

from that money he buys art supplies and seventeen merch for himself

occasionally he uploads a how-to video or shows his drawing process 

he gifts the members presents that he made by hand

they are also personalized

he likes to design clothes with their logos and with rose quartz and serenity colors 

has been dying to see the members on the return of superman

he wants to have 13 dogs each named after a member

bias: wonwoo - the chill cutie whom he loves to draw realistic portraits of

ship: soonwoo - they are fun and seem soft with each other

Minghao:

runs a chinese fansite alone 

always there at the airport when they arrive 

takes a lot of pictures and he is slowly improving 

does airport fashion evaluations 

always worried about their health 

some of them got injured? he already wrote a long rant about it and is ready to sue pledis 

"just let them rest damnit" 

always sends them cute messages when they post on sns 

mainly to jun because his korean isn't that good 

never wants to admit but mingyu is his biggest bias wrecker 

always feels attacked by him 

loves the choreos and since he is in a street dance group he always sneaks in a little seventeen 

bias: soonyoung 

ship: soonhoon

Seungkwan:

literally has no chill when someone insults seventeen or carats

he gets into fights and arguments pretty easily online

he is like in the battlefront when it comes to fan wars

but with his mutuals he is really sweet

if he sees pledis mistreating seventeen well he is going to be that one netizen who really doesn't leave the company alone until they do justice

on fansigns the members can already recognize him

he always makes them laugh and gives them funny gifts

he can even be sassy with the members but they like him a lot

hates when the members have to rank each other on their looks

he is a lowkey abbs hunter whenever they have loose sweatshirts on

bias: joshua - with his sweet voice and funny rap style

ship: jihan 

Hansol:

the meme master 

has a folder only dedicated to svt memes 

someone of seventeen made a derp face? has it gifed in milliseconds 

has a crack youtube video account where he uploads videos with face voice overs 

when someone posts something online he replies with a meme 

literally haunting seventeen 

probably has the tweet of that one time when minghao noticed him printed and framed 

always asks them to do the trends 

goes to concerts with cardboards of their derp faces 

he likes them peach booties and tight pants

bias: seungcheol 

ship: meanie

Chan:

a hardworking carat 

organizes fan projects worldwide for concert 

also organizes for special events and they are pretty big 

like they would turn off the music during their performance and have the whole arena sing while a video is played for seventeen 

has a carat squad that everyone knows and likes 

they interact a lot online openly and they are pretty funny 

the one who sends birthday presents to every member 

and buys food for fan signs because they have to eat 

"guys the moral of the story is stan seventeen" 

stays up to vote and uses several accounts 

streams mvs for weeks 

bias: minghao 

ship: gyuhao

Happy Carat Day!

[idkijustlovebts]

One Year 💜

I can’t believe that I am writing this because that means it has been one year since I became an ARMY. The year has absolutely FLOWN by and I cant believe everything that has happened in the last year. So let's toss it back to the beginning, shall we?

So, fun fact, I LOVE Jimmy Fallon. My dream job is to work in his social media department at the Tonight Show. I have watched his show every day since he was even the host of Late Night.

So I was first exposed to BTS on the tonight show back in 2018 and yet somehow it didn’t stick back then like it did a year ago. I remember watching the entire episode they were on, being impressed with the performance and STILL not looking more into it (can you believe).

I remember how cute it was when they were all introducing themselves and when they got to Jimin, Jimmy said, “Here we go! My man! Here we go!” and Jimin when, “Hey Jimmy! I’m Jimin!” and I was so endeared!!! And yet, nothing. 2018 me would’ve never guessed that man would become my bias wrecker in 2020.

So fast forward to February 2020. BTS was on the Tonight Show again. This time it was a subway special. My god, it was my bread and butter because I just really love New York and Jimmy was showing it off with BTS in tow. I really think that is what helped peak my interest with them. I remember being FLOORED by their “ON” performance at grand central. That dance break was (and always will be) INSANE.

Now, this didn’t necessarily get me to keep looking into them. I just kept watching the performance over and over again.

Then a few days later, I saw a Carpool Karaoke video recommended to me. I regularly watch Carpool (and I love them. Such a unique interview style) so it wasnt out of the blue. And wow. I was pretty much hooked. They were so freakin cute and funny. The songs were incredible! Tae was unbelievably handsome (I honestly would technically consider him my first bias… but sorry babe, that didn’t last long and you are pretty low on the list now 😬). But what really did me in was Jungkook’s vocals in “ON” and “Finesse”. I was stunned. He had the voice of an angel. To say I was obsessed with the Carpool was an understatement. I remember thinking that the one in the plaid was having so much fun at PlyoJam and was SO good at the body rolls. Makes sense now that our dance king was so incredible. I also remember thinking Jimin must be the top dancer if he is teaching. Still makes me a little mad that Hobi didn’t teach, but it is what it is. Anyways, I continued to watched their other videos from when they were on James Cordon and Jimmy Fallon for the rest of the night.

Then the next morning they were trending because they had their ON comeback at MCountdown. Someone tweeted (and I remember it so clearly) and said “Jungkook said his mic is ON” and it was the bridge from ON.

I watched that video a few times over and then went to something else on twitter. I couldn’t stop thinking about it that whole day, however. So then when I went to try and go find the tweet later because I wanted to watch it again (and duh they were still trending) I couldn’t find it. So I went with what clues I could find in the trend and I found it on YouTube. I screen recorded the bridge and that is the first thing that I have saved on my camera roll that is BTS.

These three things are what sold me. The Tonight Show, Carpool Karaoke, and a tweet singling out Jungkook's amazing voice. I couldn’t stop. I was watching performance after performance and I was enthralled. Their stage presence was insane to me. However, thats how deep it got. I told myself I couldn’t get obsessed and I couldn’t go to deep into it (I am a former One Direction stan. I suppose maybe that is some PTSD lol). I was only going to watch performances and listen to their music… well, four seasons of Bon Voyage, countless documentary movies and series, Bangtan Bombs, lives, and so much more content later, I’m an ARMY. So crazy that I didn’t accept it at first. I even asked twitter for help on good songs to listen to first because their discography is insane and I couldn’t figure it out. I did that instead of digging because I didn’t want to get in too deep (she says as she is now learning Korean. I’ve been told I have an obsessive personality).

So that’s all it was, performances and music. I couldn’t fall in love. The morning of March 9th, I woke up and saw some trend about Yoongi’s birthday and I remember saying out loud “Oh! It’s one of their birthdays?!” That was my first BTS birthday. Naturally he ended up being my bias and love of my life. But I never got to enjoy his birthday, because I tried to be nonchalant about loving them. I am SO pumped for his birthday this year!

To be honest, I am not quite sure what happened after that. It was such a blur. I think I just watched a lot of compilation videos for a month and I wanted to see what the clips were really from. Then I updated this Tumblr (on April 2nd, I checked) to a BTS tumblr (from an inactive One Direction account) and just started finding BTS blogs and I haven’t stopped since. I didn’t know much when I switched my username over, I just knew that I really loved them, hence idkijustlovebts.

In the last year I was here for Bangbangcon (the two day 12 hour youtube stream), D-2, the 7th festa (🥺 7), Bangbangcon Live, Map of the Soul 7-The Journey, Break the Silence series and movie, In the Soop, Map of The Soul ON:E, countless Run BTS episodes and vlives, record breaking singles and albums, Grammy nominations, and so so so much more.

I went from thinking Tae was scary because he had no reaction in flinch to realizing he is the most youthful and fun person (and has the best inner child). From thinking Namjoon was arrogant (!) for claiming to be the leader of the group because he spoke English (I’m an idiot, I know), but learning that is a thing in K-Pop and he is the sweetest boy who loves nature and art (and makes me appreciate it more). To learning the Hobi can go from being a literal ray of sunshine to the devil reincarnate in 2.2 when he performs (he's insane. Jimin too). From thinking that Yoongi was some cold, emotionless person to falling head over heels for that man because he is the softest, most caring person with a heart of gold that is full of passion for his music, and he wouldn’t hurt a fly.

So much has happened in the last year and they have been my comfort the whole way through. It is true what they say, “you found BTS when you need them the most”. I was very unhappy with my life last year. They gave me a reason to smile and a reason to wake up every day. They have made me feel so loved. A love I have never felt from a celebrity. It is so obvious how grateful and appreciative they are for ARMY and I am so unbelievably grateful for them. They are my comfort. They are my safe space. They are my whole world (re: my pinned post). I know if I am having a bad day, I can turn on any BTS content and have an instant mood boost.

I am so unbelievably grateful for the last year, and I can't wait to see what more BTS has in store for us for many many years to come because I will be along for the entire ride.

[chubbsismyfavouritechubbybo-blog]

shitty commentary crew preference - going on holiday together

songs of inspiration - one bad night by hayley kiyoko, gravel to tempo by hayley kiyoko and full moon by sgbg.

author’s note: i’ve been seeing preferences all over tumblr and i’ve been really wanting to write one for ages, but since i haven’t written anything in a week, i wanted to mae it up to you by doing a really big one to make up for it. hope you all enjoy it, gang! - l.t.

billy // chubbs

- you decided to book a surprise trip for the both of you to go to japan, since he’s always wanted to go. his face lit up as soon as you told him, immidiately giving you a bear hug and a kiss on the cheek - he was more excited than he actually let on to be.

- you would cling onto him while you were at heathrow airport due to how busy it was, and he would let you use him as a human radiator and pillow to nap on the plane. in return (if he wasn’t napping himself, that is), he would mess with your hair while you were sleeping and somehow managed to get it all tangled, but you didn’t mind.

- he held your hand tightly as you both walked up and down the streets no matter what time it was - he just wanted you to be safe and for you to come to no harm.

- every night you would go to small sushi food restaurants, late at night as you surrounded yourselves with the loud, busy night enclosing you both, while you got ever so slightly tipsy on beer.

- you would take the most adorable polaroid pictures under the sweet cherry blossom trees, then to plaster them over instagram and twitter.

- you would go to a manga store making fun of weeaboos, but you ended up ironically buying loads of the different manga to read on the plane ride home, even if you couldn’t understand japanese.

- you were both heartbroken to go home.

hyojin // squizxy

- since the pair of you were dating long distance, you decided to fly out to australia to go and see her for the first. you would both be bubbling with excitment, even weeks before you were supposed to fly out.

- on the day, you would skype her to say that you were waiting for the plane and would be seeing her in only a matter of hours now. you would both be ecastatic but slightly nervous at the same time.

- when you got off the plane to meet her, she ran up to you like her life absolutely depended on it, and you did the same but trying to carry all your luggage at the same time. you both hugged each other as hard as you possibly could without killing each other, and many happy tears were shed.

- you both travelled to sydney to go do sightseeing, and hyojin just couldn’t stop hugging you on the train journey there.

- fennec fox jokes. you also surprised her with a pair of the godly fennec fox ears for her, which made her made, but she secretly loved them.

- she drew a picture of you standing in front of the sydney opera house, which she them turned into an adorable animation to put on her twitter.

- it was hard to leave each other, but you knew deep down that the future was looking brighter than ever before and you were more in love with her than ever before.

will // herotic

- will would have to take you to on a daytrip somewhere since you had both just finished your gcse exams, were pretty fucking exhausted, and broke.

- you both settled to go to the beach for the day - it was nothing fancy, but you were still excited and you didn’t mind since you got to see each other.

- your mum drove you both there, and she kept embarassing you in front of him with embarassing stories from when you were little, which will really enjoyed.

- you both got double scoop ice creams, which you both shared as you walked hand in hand along the sea front, the sand tickling the inbetween bits between your toes softly. after you had finished it, you got a bit on your right cheek, which he kissed softly.

- you both walked around the sea front and the surrounding village, talking about youtube drama and current trending topics.

- you both got fish and chips to take home because you were too tired to eat out anywhere fancy. you leant on his shoulder, as he wrapped his slim hand around your waist while you waited for your mum to pick you both up.

brad // braddoesbanter

- “oi dickhead, let’s go to paris.”

- you were sceptical as to why brad wanted to go to paris, but you decided to book plane and hotel tickets anyway.

- “do you think that the eiffel tower is as big as my cock?” he said as you both stood beneth it taking selfies to put on instagram and twitter (if he wasn’t suspended lol) later. you just rolled your eyes at his stupid comment, but secretly found it funny.

- you both snuck frech pastries on the plane to eat because you both loved them so much, and didn’t speak to each other the whole way back since you had your mouths full with the pastries.

erling // atozy

- he would take you to his home country of norway as a treat for your birthday, and it would also be an oppourtunity for erling to see his family too. you would be excited to finally meet them and to finally experience a taste of norwegian culture that you had been hearing about from him for so long.

- it was really cool hearing erling speak norwegian, especially since it made it easier to speak to the locals and to order food.

- his family were super sweet when you met them and ate dinner with them too. they told many embarassing stories of erling from when he was younger, although he did not like this and went all red everytime they would tell one.

- he would take you to a norwegian food market, and you would try the food there together, and you decided to grab some coffee afterwards.

- you would, at some point, take you for a walk in the snow, and you would end up building a snowman. it was slightly lopsided, but that really didn’t matter right now.

- cute polaroid pictures!!

alex // imallexx

- he would surprise you with plane tickets to go to california, and had many other surprises for you in store for when you got there, which you didn’t know about you just yet.

- you’d go to pink berry every day and just stuff your faces with food there, then you’d hike up to go see the hollywood sign. you’d take so many adorable selfies, which would then be either memed to death or be made into super cute edits.

- he’d surprise you with tickets to go see your favourite band, which you were absolutely over the moon about because you didn’t get to see them back home. when you were in line to go in to the arena, he’d lend you his internet sensation hoodie until you went in because it was getting colder.

- you’d dance and sing the night away together even if alex wasn’t too fond of the music and he didn’t know many of the lyrics. despite this, he still enjoyed seeing you happy and the experience in general.

- by the end of it all, you’d end up falling asleep on his shoulder on the plane home, while he smiled to himself about what a great time he had.

niall // pyrocynical

- you thought he was making some sort of skit for one of his videos when he told you that he would be taking you to disneyland, but he was being serious. excited laughter and hugs then ensued.

- you would both buy matching minnie mouse ears to wear around the resort together, while buying way too many sweets and then stuffing them in your mouths. niall would constantly say, “we look like basic bitches, don’t we?”

- you would go on the same rides too many times, until you got bored. if it was high and scary ride, he would hold onto your hand for dear life to make sure that you were okay and wasn’t scared.

- after going on all the rides, you took so many selfies of you both, your phone storage almost ran out. all over twitter, there was nothing but cute comments and supports from the fans and a shit ton of flower crown edits had managed to find their way onto tumblr *shivers*

[popculturedruid]

How would you recommend finding out more about an entity when the source material is very vague, limited, and not very popular? I'm trying to figure out a pantheon based on the Great Ones from Bloodborne, but information about pretty much all of them is few and far between. Also, I have trouble meditating due to literal ADHD, do you have any ideas for how to concentrate better? Thank you so much, your blog is lovely!!

Aww, thank you so much! That means a lot!

This is such a good question. I wanted to take some time here again to really answer this one to give you a proper answer. That’s why it took me a bit to get back to you.

I understand your frustration here. It is very frustrating to look for information about your desired entity and find little to nothing. I looked up Bloodborne just to see what we were getting at, then quickly realized I was going to give myself spoilers because I probably wanted to play this game. :)

From the bit that I let myself get a look at, the Great Ones pantheon immediately reminds me of the Daedra from the Elder Scrolls games. Not in such basic terms as good and evil, but simply from the scope of multiple forms, alternate planes, and just generally screwing with people. There is a fairly large group of Tamriel PCPs on Tumblr, it might be worth a look to check into see how they structure their relationships for ideas to maybe start your own. I’m going to refer you over to @popculturepagan who has a tag on Elder Scrolls PCP. Not saying you need to go that way at all, I’m just trying to show you another pantheon that’s a bit more established that might give you some ideas to help you get yours started!

It appears the direct reference for the Great Ones is H.P. Lovecraft and his “Great Old Ones.” You have undoubtedly heard of Cthulhu. Cthulhu is just a high priest to one of them. Many folks make Cthulhu and the Great Old Ones out to be chibi, but if you read the stories, they’re actually quite terrifying. If you haven’t read the stories, and you’re still itching for more Bloodborne, the best place to go would be for the inspiration for the Great Ones: Lovecraft’s stories. He wrote many, but you can get the stories that just contain the ones with Cthulhu. I think they would also mostly include the Great Old Ones in those as well. His stories are just great in general, however. From these stories of the GOO (I got tired writing that out :P), you could probably pick up a bit more on the general characteristics of your GOs.

I would also encourage you to search through fanfiction. I have called fanfiction our weird version of Shared Personal Gnosis. If the community in general kinda feels a certain way about a character, they generally might be on to something.

For instance, everyone is probably going to say that Luke Skywalker seems like a pretty swell guy. He’s not likely to go nuts anytime soon (I would though, all alone on that planet, let’s be real). If someone writes a version of Luke that runs around murdering all the things for the lolz, people are generally going to disagree.

(That’s not to say you can’t end up contacting a different version of that entity, but that’s getting into something different, and that’s where the theory of multiverses comes into play. And how @octomantra and I have two different Eds in our heads.)

You might point out again that this is a small community still, and a character being out of character this early on is not going to be as obvious as Luke running around killing all the younglings. But I hope you would start to see a trend in how others are viewing this world as well, even if they aren’t viewing it in the exact same way. It’s still getting built.

Here’s the link to the Archive of Our Own Bloodborne Tag: https://archiveofourown.org/tags/Bloodborne%20(Video%20Game)/works

Fanfiction.net:https://m.fanfiction.net/game/Bloodborne/

I also noticed there is a huge crossover community at FF.net. Not sure if that really would mean much to you, but here you are:https://m.fanfiction.net/crossovers/Bloodborne/12234/

As for your question about ADHD and meditating, I feel your pain here. I have this, and it takes a lot for me to focus. To get my brain even in the mindset I say the Jedi code about 3 times until my brain realizes we’re going to just STOP for a second. And this takes a sheer force of will to get it to stop and focus. For a moment. It’s fine if you can’t, I’m lucky if I can for about 30 seconds before my brain is on to whatever else I thought I needed to do next.

In answering your question, however, I realized that for me if I truly want to meditate and reach out to my entities I have to create a place in my head where I’m going. It can’t just be “breathe in, breathe out.” Then my brain starts going, “wait, am I doing the breathing right? Wait, is my mind wandering? Wait, I’m still the only person in this room, right?” Even though I know damn well I’m the only person in the room because I would have heard it, but my brain just thinks, “ooh, shiny!” And I’m gone.

If I want to actually talk to my people for more than 10 seconds I have to create a place in my head for me to actually be standing in. You would think it’d be more distracting, but apparently once I’m out of how distracting this world is I’m fine. The other place can’t be too detailed either though, otherwise I’m like, “hey, I got to get closer to that countertop because I don’t know what color it is EXACTLY, and if I don’t know right now, I may literally die.” Forget the fact I’m talking to someone, nope, I’m gone.

You will fail sometimes, and it will be fine. I do it frequently enough. I usually don’t go into meditation to talk to my entities, I just talk out loud. I suppose this could be a talking meditation if I’m focusing hard enough. This doesn’t always work. I have a particularly amusing memory of trying to pseudo meditate/talk to tell Colonel Mustang “happy birthday, Colonel” and “it is good to meet you” in Japanese on his birthday. I’d only been learning the language for 3 days. I had worked fairly hard to get to this point, so I was fairly proud of myself. Colonel Mustang had been grumpy all day, and I had a fairly good idea why. So I thought, “hey, let’s try to greet him in the language his original materials were printed in to see if it will cheer him up.” It did, for about 30 seconds, until my brain completely derailed because I knew one of the words wasn’t translating properly. I spent the next at least 20 minutes tracking the problem until I somewhat figured it out. By then though, the damage was done. He was back to being irritated, and I got the distinct impression he wouldn’t even look at me. At the time, I was disappointed. Now, it’s funny because I realize he was throwing a hissy fit. (The chaos in my head, right now.)

So, as silly as it sounds, make a happy place. A field in the middle of nowhere, a snowy plain, your favorite movie, a library, the actual area your characters are from, wherever. Create the starting place, but let the world build itself. That’s what I do. I don’t build it. I let it happen. It’s less stressful, and less distracting.

It sounds insanely difficult, but it’s not. We don’t let our imaginations run free anymore, but when we do, it’s beautiful.

Besides building your happy place, I also try to minimize distractions by going into a room where I won’t be disturbed by someone for at least a fair bit of time. I have to make sure the room is straightened first. It doesn’t have to be absolutely cleaned, but just tidied first or I can’t concentrate on anything other than, “did you just invite your friends over to a pig sty?” I turn off the lights. I get into comfortable clothing, which for me is just sweatpants and a hoodie. I get into a comfortable position, it doesn’t matter if it’s sitting or laying down, hell it can be standing if it’s what works for you. Just make sure you can stay in it without having to move. I like lighting a candle, because candles. I pull up my hoodie and just start zoning and talking. I focus on a place right behind my eyes, oddly enough. It actually slightly hurts, but I’m assuming it’s because I have strabismus, and I’m making my eyes go straight. I actually caution against falling asleep in this state. I have done it a couple times, and it’s like you bring things back from whatever gate you didn’t close. I have had the oddest dreams while falling asleep mid-meditation. That’s just me. Maybe you’ll find something else. :D

If and when you decide to get your practice started, whether with the Great Ones or whomever, and if you create a Tumblr, please let me know. Or even if you just create anything let me know so I can have a link for the next person who comes asking. This community only gets bigger when we reach out to each other! I am super happy to see new universes get people everyday. It’s super exciting!

Best of luck! I hope I helped a little, and please, please, please let me know if you have any more questions!

[chickenstuffedwithmozzarella]

Hii!! I'm really sorry it took me so long, but here i am once again. You also had a busy week? Eveything okay? You babysitted your cousin again? Jajajajajaj noo. That would be very sad. Do not miss the concert because of that! Bring them ans then you'll see. I saw pics of one of his concerts were people had ballons and it looked wonderful! (1)

Hi love!!  Seriously, don’t worry about how long it takes you to answer me. I know your busy, and you have to study and all that, so… And yeah, last week was a bit busy, so out of normalcy, jajajja. Bc I never have things to do,lol.Yeah, I’ll bring the balloons 🎈 and I’ll see what I do. If it’s a success I’ll take a pic to show you,jajaja. That concert that Niall streamed the other day? They have balloons, jejejeje. It’s from where I got the idea 😅.

I know what a Diskman is, but i nevver had one. Anyway, i was not laughing of Andy and Lucas. I cannot judge since i have only heard one spng that was included in the Singstar Karaoke🤷. Wow, you had a good time in the 2000. You saw the most famous ones!! Ed was magical. His live was so good!! He was there all alonne and he pulled it off so well. Very lively😍 I almost cried when it ended (2)

Jajajajaaja, I know you weren’t laughing at it, jajajaja (but I totally was, lol, it’s so embarrassing). But I guess I was a teen and they were our own one direction,jajajajajajaja (no! Nada que ver!!) You think? I’ve always thought I didn’t go to a lot of concerts. I love music and concerts, so I guess I just wish I could go to a lot more,jajajajaa. Oh Ed… I’ve seen some videos of his concerts, and I want to go to one. He came to Spain around my birthday in 2014? And I wanted to go, but the place was very small and the tickets were sold out in a few minutes. I didn’t fight for them too much, either,jajaja. I’m happy you enjoyed it!!! That feel at the end of a concert is the best and the worst at the same time.

Noo! He is not disgusting. Poor baby. JAJAJAJAJ. You really managed to find a larrie at the concert? It could have been any fan, or even a het one, and you found the larrie? Lucky girl!! Yep. She is updated on everything. Only thing she doesnt follow is Harry’s suits, which is a pity because they are The Best and I dont even like fasion but still they make me want to chance my mind. I would love to see him at the Met Gala. He would be the king of the event. (3)

Oh, my baby, I love him, jajajaja, but he’s so weird… 🤣🤣🤣🤣.Not only did I find a larrie. I sold her my tickets,jajajaja. But lol, we were so afraid someone would hear us talking and say something to us 😅😅.Genuine question: how does she keep updated? I’m always missing things, and I live in tumblr, jajajaa. I don’t know how people can keep up with everything!    I’m always thinking I’m doing something wrong,jajajajaj.Harry’s suit are in another league. I admire him just for being brave enough to wear them. He would be the king at a Met Gala. But it bothers me that they always talk only about what women wear at those events. He should start walking red carpets to show the world how do you wear suits,jajajaja.

Is it later already? Can we talk about you being a witch? Yay!! You already started the tag. I now have a tag😎 i feel cool. (I’m jealous of your cousin-in-law (?) too. Uni would be much easier with that ability). I feel a bit stupid, but i cannot understand how they can say he is slow while at the same time he is doing all of that, but, Go little boy!! I’m cheering on you! (4)

Jajajja, we have this joke in my family where we say I’m half witch,jajaja. It’s just I’ve have night dreams sometimes, that predicted the future? Jajajajaj like once I had a dream about a girl how comes to the shop. In the dream, she was at the hospital,very ill. Well, I had been a few weeks I haven’t see her, and I told my sister about my dream. I didn’t thought anything about the dream. But that same evening that girl’s mom went to the shop. And my sister told her about my dream. And the mom told my sister that her daughter has been hospitalized for more than a week, very ill (but she was already recovered). My sister called me immediately after,jjajaja.Then, another night I dreamed with two crows. I was walking down an empty road, and they were flying behind me. One closer to me than the other. (Ufff, I still get anxious thinking about it). When I woke up I looked up the meaning of dreams, and find out that crows mean death. Well, the next month my brother-in-law’s granny died. And the next week my cousin. (See? One closer to me that’s the other…) I was so scared back then… And well, I’m always having those gut feelings, or whatever they are. Like last year I predicted the date when that baby girl I’ve talked to you about was going to be born,jajajaja. My sister is always asking me to see the future,jajajaja. But it’s something I don’t control,p (and don’t fully believe, jajajaa) eh eh!!! I just remember another thing!!! Jajajaja, fandom related, even. One day I was taking a nap, when Suddenly Louis came into my dream telling (about something he had bought for D*nielle😅): it’s Gucci! It’s Gucci!! Well, I woke up after that and opened tumblr. And there were new pics of Louis wearing that jumper with a bee and a fence phrase? And everyone was crazy screaming IT’S GUCCI!! IT’S GUCCI!!! 🤣🤣🤣🤣. And I was still half sleep thinking: I did it again…😅.

Yeah!! You ARE cool. And now have your own tag!!jajajjaWell, I don’t understand that about my cousin, tbh. And I don’t know how to explain it either. He knows (or memorizes) those things, but I’m not sure if he understands what they mean. But also then he has trouble understanding simple things. Like if he wants to eat something (chocolate) and you tell him that he has to eat dinner first, and then he can eat the chocolate, he doesn’t get it. And it’s not like other stubborn kids. It’s just he doesn’t understand what late means. Or he doesn’t like to have his hair cut, because he thinks it won’t ever grow out again. Same with cutting his nails. I’ve discovered now that he doesn’t mind having them filed out (Limadas), so I do his nails whenever he has them too long,jejeje.

Yes!! You really did manage to put rainbows on the cake. How smart and sneaky. And it looks so good😍. You did all that? JAJAJAJJAA Listen, i would trade my non existent masculinity for those marshmallows and i dont even like them. Thats how good they look. Yeah, nop. I’m not going to do that. We arent that close anymore, i probably wont see her for a couple of months and i dont think she would listen. She only sent it to me bcs “ tu eres feminista y toda esas tonterias” and wow. Okaaay. (5)

I’m pleased to inform you that that cake was a totally success,jajajaja. Someone saw while I was making it and asked me if it were for a gay parade? I just told him it was for a baby. Well, I make another similar one yesterday and he saw it again. And he started making rude comments about gays, and how they’re expanding like a disease, just because it’s a trend now to be gay. AND I CAN’T YELL AT HIM!!! 😡😡 I just sent him a very mean look (convine these 😒🤨 emojis and that was my face) and ignored him till he went away. I HATE THAT PEOPLE!! So ignorant. But they’re worse, bc the talk like they know what they’re talking about or like they are right. And NO! Aggggg.🙄“Tú eres feminista y todas esas tonterías” wow, why didn’t she ask you for more help!! She sounds so kind… (since this is written, I’m reading that how better I please,jejje. Maybe he’s kinder that how that sounds…). Well, there’s nothing worst that people how doesn’t want to learn and hear, so… sometimes it’s simpler to ignore them 😒.

I tried explaining it to my others friends though, pointing the flaws of the sentences and they just thought i was being picky. So…i tried, but they are not going to change their minds. Which, fair enough. Oh nooo. Poor kittens :( My examens are starting next week. But this week i have to finish some assignments and they are nightmares. I have cried many times this week because of them. I hate theeeem. (Not much to keep you informed but okay. I will). (6)

Uggggg, I don’t have any advice for you. I never went to uny, so 🤷🏻‍♀️ Take it the more easy you can, but it’s something you have to go through to reach you goal, so. Look at that,jejeje, your goal. And after all this work, summer is waiting for you, so, another thing to look for up,jajaja. Good luck with everything.

Also, that story was horrifying but useful i guess?? That CD sounds heavenly. I would buy it too (but like, in a year or so bcs thats how i work xd). It wasnt “tomorrow”. And still, no news. I’m waiting for some announcement. I just want something to change. I hope the future brings only good things to Lou. Pretty please? Yeeees. Liam was/is everywhere and i’m all in for that. L, you are doing amazing sweetie. 😍 (9 of 10)

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 YOU’RE SO FUNNY!!! Jajajajajaja.Yeah, it wasn’t tomorrow, nor yesterday, nor ever. I’m so impatient!!! Did you see he reappeared today?? He’s just so cute. He has had his hair cut again. I love his hair like that 😍😍. Please, let it be an announcement soon!! (I’ve read theories about him letting his contracts run out so he can free, and if that’s the case, I’m all for it, lol, even if I have to keep waiting for another year (please no)).Liam is truly everywhere. It makes me so happy. The other day the played For You in Pasapalabra (I don’t know if that’s a common thing, bc I don’t watch tele5). And yesterday they talked about him in all the programs at Los40. Mentioning his appearance at the festival. And the have tweeted something’s about him. And I don’t care if they use him as clock baiting, if they talk about him, I’m happy.

(Just read that you were working today. I reckon you didnt babysit your cousin. Oops. I never guess correctly). You went to the doctor? I dont want to pry, but are you okay? I hope you are good!!!💕 1 day until Niall show!!! It’s already thereeeee😱😱😱😍 Ooh. My weekend was dull, i studied and that was it. Thanks for asking!! What about you? Anything interesting? Have a good night!😘😘😘 (10)

Yeah, I had to work yesterday, AND babysit too, jajaja. But we have some spare space at the shops, so I took my cousin there, and between my mom and I , took care of him. So, yes, you were correct. Your memory is better than mine (a lot better).Yeah, I went to the doctor. Everything is okay, thanks for asking,jeeje. They just have to check my lungs and heart for some surgery I want/need to take (but I don’t talk about it yet, jejeje, bc I don’t want to jinx my luck,jejjje).TOMORROW I’LL BE SEEING NIALL!!!!!! I CAN’T BELIEVE IT!!!! How is your sister doing???? Jajajjajaja I’m so nervous/excited!!!! Jekjdnffieornvonerv I did my nails this morning, and of course, I got and Irish flag on one of them,jajajaja.. I can’t wait anymoreeeeee. I hope I can take good videos,jajaja, and that we’re close enough to see his nostrils,🤣🤣🤣🤣.The most interesting thing of my week haven’t happened yet,jajaja. I’ll tell you everything on Sunday (bc Souter day I’ll be dead and have to work 😩😩😩).Tell your sister to have the time of her life. And ask her to FaceTime you for a bit so can see Niall at least!!(still wishing you could go too. Another time, I guess).Have a good day/weekend/week. And don’t stress yourself about answering.

Pd: for how long do you have exams? I hope it isn’t too long. Are they finals? (I know nothing about this 😅)