#it is for t)(e greater good

[glubbygirl]

ca was saying you also have to murder people to feed your lusus???? what the fuck.

Ummmmmmm... no? S)(e does not eat P--EOPL--E. Just ot)(er lusii, mostly wild.

[scourgeofmyownbrain]

Good fucking day, Robot enjoyers! Gaze upon the updated semi-accurate height comparison of Bumblebee across the multiverse.

This is an updated version of a chart I made a few months ago. I had gotten some feedback and then TFOne came out and I kinda had to update it. I also added a Gen 1 Optimus Prime for scale, for fun... no other reason... (edit: slight adjustment made, just corrected a slight mistake in the order)

I am also working on at least two more character charts and one universe chart, so hopefully I can finish those soon (for some fucking genius reason I decided to do the characters that show up EVERY FUCKING UNIVERSE so I'm s u f f e r i n g)

*PST! Optimus, Megatron, Shockwave, Soundwave, Ratchet, and Ironhide ones are done now*

Master Post

Listed Heights, Explanations, and Justifications below the cut, bc you couldn't shut me up if you tried and I had shit to say.

Gen 1 - ~10 feet (TFwiki says greater than 3 meters so I rounded up to the first whole number because round)

Netflix Cybertron Trilogy - ~10 feet (He looks identical to Gen 1 so... the reason his photo looks weird is because I couldn't find a good full body photo with him standing straight up facing the camera so I put two images together to make the worst looking photoshop job you have ever seen)

Earth Spark - ~10 feet (There is no confirmed height yet, but using this screen shot (see below) of him standing in front of a barn door, I was able to make a reasonable guess, bc I'm so smart.)

One V1 - ~13 feet (I am well aware of what the TFWiki says: 26.429 feet. And I fully reject that number. A: These numbers are sourced from the Walmart Promotional AR Experience that came out before the movie. B: There are three decimal points, and that number does not convert into a whole number in meters (which is originally what I thought was weird about it). C: The director has said that this movie is both canon to the LA movies and its own separate canon, and Bumblebee in both sets of LA movies does not exceed 20 feet tall. Ever. So, for sanity's sake, I have used the KCV numbers as my baseline. Bee grows when he gets his t-cog so shrink this one down a few feet. Look, I'm working on the Optimus chart rn, and one of the numbers from Beast Wars on the wiki was very observably wrong, and if I can dispute numbers older than me, I can dispute numbers 2 decades younger than me from fucking Walmart. Also, yes, his picture is 3 images sandwiched together)

Animated - 13 feet 3 Inches (There is no actual given heights, but in the comments of the previous version, @phoenix-inanis told me that they had done their own analysis of TFA heights and, gonna be real with you, I am blown away by all of their work and how detailed it is. Go marvel at how much work they put in -> https://phoenix-inanis.notion.site/TFA-Height-Chart-f6ad2960ca8c4c5b859ee4958723aaa4?pvs=4 )

One V2 - ~15 Feet (Please see reasoning above. Since this is as tall as we see Bee get, he's the same height as KCV Bee. Sweet fuck, I have put way too much effort into this shit)

Knight/Capel-Verse - 15 feet (No actual numbers, but Mirage is stated to be 15 feet tall (TFWiki), and he and Bee are like the same height, so... Capel directed the ROTB movie if you're wondering why his name is there)

Bayverse V1 - 16 feet (TFWiki. This is like the first 3 movies minimum, I don't remember when he hits his growth spurt. Also mr bay is king, we have numbers for nearly every character in BV)

Cyberverse - 18 feet (I'm gonna be honest, the only info we have is from a really shitty screen shot of a magazine. SO if any one has a copy of this book from the video below, a high quality scan would be greatly appreciated and I will kiss the ground you walk upon. Yes I found the video where the screen shot comes from leave me alone)

Bayverse V2 - 18 feet (TFWiki. Movie 4-5 I can't remember which one, I'm not re-looking this up. I fucking love the bayverse tho, this is the only universe with concrete and consistent this-character-is-this-height info)

Aligned Cont. WF/FOC - 20 feet (TFWiki/Fandom. Video game info screens you godsend, kiss me sweetly)

Aligned Cont. TFP/RID15 - 21 feet (These two designs are canonically identical, like in ALC canon, Bee has not changed visually at all...Ok, yes I got this number from fandom and they give literally no source for where they got these numbers. But, I can fully believe these are accurate. Just by looking at these characters on the show I can verify these numbers in my mind. Here, let's Compare.

This is Sam compared to Bee from one of the BV movies, I'm too lazy to check which one. Sam is average size for a human and we know Bee is 16 feet tall in the first three movies. Checks out. Let's now look at a TFP Character who is also 16 feet tall.

Jack is average size for a human, and the size difference is about the same. Can you see why I can't question the Aligned heights, even if they don't have a source??!?! They specifically made this universe to be full of freakishly tall robots for some fucking reason.)

Not Pictured: Aligned Cont. Rescue Bots and Rescue Bots Academy Bumblebee - 21 Feet tall. Look, did you want to see all 5 versions of ALC Bee? No, you don't. They're all the same height anyway; the back row would have just been a wall of redundant yellow. 5 different fucking art styles in one universe, why is that one my favourite.

Here's the front row and the back row separated into their own jpgs. I know it's kind of hard to tell which Bumblebee is which when they're all together.

[cursed-40k-thoughts]

What's the deal between Farsight and the Ethereals?

In the initial lore (from older codexes), it was fairly simple; Farsight saw the merit of engaging in values and tactics that were at odds with the tenets of the Greater Good espoused by the Ethereals, particularly inter-caste knowledge sharing, aggression, and melee combat specialisation. Things that would allow the soldiery, and thus the wider T'au Empire, to be more warlike and defend/expand borders.

This came to a head on the planet Arthas Moloch, where a war with Orks saw the Ethereals under Farsight's protection killed, implicitly in part due to the squabbling between Farsight and said Ethereals. After this war (during which Farsight found the Dawn Blade and fucked up a lot of Orks) he ended up breaking off from the T'au Empire with those loyal to his views to form the Farsight Enclaves; a more militarily focused take on the base Empire.

Overall, it was a decent look at how authoritarian/inflexible thinking and doctrines could create schisms, even in the milder cultures of 40k.

The Kelly era T'au, of course, added to this in a Kelly-esque fashion. It wasn't JUST that the Ethereals didn't like Farsight's views, but ALSO they were hiding info about CHAOS and DAEMONS from the T'au and doing EVIL MIND CONTROL on the T'au and it wasn't just Orks that showed up on Arthas Moloch but DAEMONS that the T'au weren't prepared for because of the aforementioned EVIL MIND CONTROL and DAEMONS killed the Ethereals and Farsight killed them back with the Dawn Blade. After that he confirms his suspicions about the EVIL MIND CONTROL and, when faced with the choice of revealing the EVIL MIND CONTROL to the entire T'au Empire and destroying it all (because the Empire is held together by EVIL MIND CONTROL) or walking away with his loyalists, he chooses to walk away. Because he cares about the T'au as a whole and is BIG HERO. Not one of those ethereals and their EVIL MIND CONTROL.

E V I L M I N D C O N T R O L

Fuck knows how it'll go if Van Nguyen and his actually good T'au writing are allowed to touch Farsight.

[youvebeengalindafied]

This is all @polyarmy and @fiyeroba ‘s fault for making me sad about Glinda again so now I’m posting my whole Glinda Meta here (originally an obnoxiously long dm sent to @gamorahww who is a patient saint)

You’ve asked for it, and now you get……The Glinda Meta™

First: I have been obsessed w/ Glinda's character for like 15 years. She is my roman empire. But I also really LIKE her as a flawed character - something that the fandom has always seemed to be a little uncomfortable with.

She is, to me, what Jane Austen once wrote about Emma:

“I am going to write a heroine whom no one but myself will much like.”

Full meta character analysis under the cut. Uh. Strap in.

(This gets a lil long sorry, but PLEASE HEAR ME OUT -)

To me, the interesting thing is what actually - ACTUALLY - motivates Glinda to act the way she does is so much greater and deeper than a simple desire for success/fame/popularity.

Like obviously in literature/critique of narrative, we have this idea of protagonists vs supporting characters. Supporting characters might have philosophies or goals that drive them (think Nessa and Boq) but those philosophies and goals are usually not developed into self-contradictory nuance the way a protagonist's motivations are. They’re just facts about the character.

And in my option, a big problem in the wicked fandom is that everybody seems to treat Glinda as a supporting character whose motivations are easy to digest. To most fans, she's either the girlfriend who is there to support Elphaba's story by being "loving but conflicted." Or to critics she's entirely selfish and cruel (even as she's fun and interesting), and therefore a semi-antagonist

But if you step back and treat Glinda as a true antihero protagonist of Wicked (for the sake of the mental character study), you see that she's not actually motivated by love or popularity or even success....what drives her is desperation.

Glinda sees her world as a place that cannot be changed and will only work to destroy those who cannot correctly operate in it. And she is SO DESPERATE to avoid that. Elphaba's fate is actually her worst fear - she cannot break away from society and leap to a new fate, because she is the ultimate cynic who thinks there is no way that could possibly work. In fact, it's an enormous testament to her love (however you want to intepret that) of Elphaba that she's even willing to consider leaving during Defying Gravity. For a brief moment, her immense, incredible faith in Elphaba is almost enough to overcome her complete desperation to survive the horrible world she thinks she's in.

And that obviously means that she's not as noble as Elphaba or as brave as Fiyero as a character - she cannot make the choice to leave when both of them do at different points - but that's because she's the most "human" character in the story. Most people are not brave enough to become international terrorists, even in the face of great evil. We might join in a developed cause, but to knowingly walk towards what is likely one's death to change a system you know you’ll actually have very little effect on...that takes a very special kind of person. And while Glinda is a GOOD person, she is too much a cynic and too desperate to survive her crazy world to become that impossible standard of the Rebel or the Hero. She's just a flawed, scared girl, in circumstances she never dreamed she’d be in.

And then the craziest thing happens:

Rather than showing Glinda that she should have been brave and done what E and F did, the narrative instead goes and basically confirms all her darkest fears: Elphaba rebels...and her revolution fails, and Glinda loses her best friend to bitter hatred and insanity for most of Act 2. Fiyero decides to leave and do the right thing by going with Elphaba....and he is almost immediately murdered in a horrible, violent way as punishment for it. This can only reinforce for Glinda that the State/the System/the World is all-powerful, and she must bow to it.

But that's the most fascinating moment for her character, because the very moment she realizes the absolute overwhelming power of the system (March of the Witch Hunters) is also the very moment that chooses to die rather than perpetuating it. She leaves the City to approach Elphaba - whom Glinda thinks POSSIBLY WANTS TO KILL HER - and BEGS Elphaba to not die. Begs Elphaba to stop her self-sacrificial madness. Begs Elphaba to allow Glinda to sacrifice herself instead ("Then I'll go, I'll tell everybody the truth!" "No! They'll just turn against you!" "I DON'T CARE!" - this girl who is entirely motivated by survival is straight up throwing it all on the line ready to walk to her death at the hands of a mob with wide open, unblinking eyes)

And obviously, in doing so, she is making the same choice that Fiyero did earlier in the story, But the huge difference is that Fiyero is a classic case of a "dead from the beginning" character, and he does not have the same motivations as her. He starts as a nhilist already embracing death in Dancing Through Life and his character is not somebody who is desprate to survive - his character is driven by a desperation for a faith. And Elphaba (and her cause) is his faith that he happily martyrs himself for.

By contrast, Glinda is terrified of the system that is trying to kill her, and she is desperate to survive it. She sees the way it takes everything form her, again and again, destroying everything she loves - Elphaba, Fiyero, her own sense of goodness…

(And she is extremely genre-aware that she is in a tragedy: her world isn't fair, and she knows that Elphaba will fail. She knows this will all go wrong.)

But Glinda still has such strength of character that she - in the end - overcomes all of her fear, all of her weaknesses, and humbles herself at the pyre to join the people she loves so much in their fate. She both offers to die for Elphaba and she takes up Elphaba's work and dedicates her entire life to it, consequences be damned. And that comes from a place of ultimate love and goodness, despite all of her flaws and all the temptations dissuading her.

Because Glinda is not Elphaba or Fiyero - she isn't a starry-eyed optimistic rebel or a man with a obsessive, loving faith. She is just a girl. Just Emma. And she is extremely flawed, and has so many fears that push and pull at her in a way the other main characters do not experience. But despite being so painfully, humanly defective, her goodness allows her to do the right thing in the end.

tl;dr - the greatest thing about Glinda’s character is that she is flawed, and she is weak and makes all the wrong choices. But in the end, she humbles herself completely - to the point of offering her own life for Elphaba and taking the whole weight of the world on her shoulders despite all her fear - because she is ultimately good.

And thus in the end, she becomes the person that Elphaba so clearly sees her as throughout the story: good, caring, and able to make real change in the world. She will now try desperately to fully live up to Elphaba's incredible faith in her. And it's so heartbreaking and tragic, but also one of the best character arcs ever.

So I guess it's less "wants to stay safe in her bubble" and more "she sees no option other than to stay safe. The State/System is all-powerful and there is nothing she thinks she can do to change that. But the beauty of the character lies in her decision to step out of that bubble anyways."

—

BONUS: Glinda’s flaws in relation to her relationship with Elphaba

(Or why Gelphie is a devastating ship (romantically or not) but not in the way you think)

This section dedicated to the SJB/AA performance that just BREAKS ME.

Elphaba basically sees Glinda through some WILDLY rose-tinted glasses (which is just. such a fascinating insight into elphaba’s character). Which is why a good chunk of the fandom accepts it as fact that Glinda is ~not actually all that flawed~ or is somehow being forced to make the decisions she is (she is not. the narrative point of Fiyero’s character is to prove that lol)

Glinda is very much complicated and does make some truly terrible decisions. Elphaba just sees and believes the good in her, despite everything she does (because it’s also a fact of the story that - either platonically or romantically - she’s clearly a little in love with Glinda. (The passes she gives that girl…)). I don’t think her weird thing about Glinda is particularly rational, but it is undeniably all-consuming.

And that makes their relationship feel VERY human. Their flaws don't make them unworthy of each other’s love and respect and friendship. Elphaba's love of Glinda is pretty crazy in light of how much Glinda’s morals and choices differ from her own, but that’s the kind of love that real, sometimes illogical people have. Anybody trying to prove the logic or compatibility of the characters is kinda missing the point - it doesn’t make sense, and THAT’S how you know it’s love.

(Brief aside: similar to Elphaba’s obsession with Glinda, Fiyero is also irrationally obsessed with Elphaba. I mean, she kinda sucks at the whole revolution thing (she's trying!!) and he's clearly starry-eyed ignoring a LOT of her flaws lol. In contrast - for better or worse, Glinda does see Elphaba's flaws and calls them out, just as Elphaba sees Fiyero's flaws and calls him out. It’s a nice little circular relationship)

But…but….is it gay???

Sure. I think so - but I’m a lesbian who has shipped it since I was a preteen lol. But that’s also NOT THE POINT, and focusing on only the romantic angle of their relationship REALLY ignores just how layered and complex it is.

Taking off my squee shipping glasses for a minute: they’re fundamentally just two people in some version of an EXTREMELY intense relationship. I honestly think Glinda reads as a little terrified of how insanely intense her relationship is with Elphaba. She fears walking down that road and fully falling into that intense, all-consuming love. (And we literally learn why later through Fiyero’s ‘death’ and Elphaba’s insanity - love makes you do some crazy things, and Glinda can’t afford that in this world.)

Regardless of whether you interpret them romantically or not - it’s clear they’re very intense about each other and Glinda is very afraid that Elphaba is her weakness. Unfortunately, Elphaba is also her soulmate and the love of her life, and she’ll always come back again. That fact will ruin Glinda’s life in the end, but it will have been worth it for all the love that was there

[dreamwatch]

Written for @steddieholidaydrabbles.

Merry Christmas, Tommy Hagan

Prompt Day 15: Ornament | Word Count: 1000 | Rating: T | CW: Language | Tags: Pre-Season 3, pre-Steddie, time jump, 90s established Steddie, protective Steve Harrington, Tommy Hagan is a idiot, good guy Steve,

I’ve never done a holiday prompt before, but this idea wouldn’t go away. It’s late, but hey, at least I posted it in December!

Steve’s had a shitty couple of months and Christmas can’t get here fast enough.  Tommy and Billy’s smug fucking faces are driving him mad, there’s literally no escape from these clowns. And if it’s not them then it’s Nancy and Jonathan parading around like they’re lovesick puppies, even if they do look embarrassed whenever he clocks them.

He gets to class as soon as possible, grabbing the back seat. It means fighting with Eddie Munson, but there seems to be something emanating from Steve that makes even the school freak back off. Eddie drops into the seat in-front of him instead, and for a second Steve feels bad about it; Eddie’s on his second go round, and if Steve was having to repeat senior year he’d want to hide at the back too, but right now his need it greater. 

He zones out, something that’s been happening with alarming regularity since getting hit in the head last month. When he looks up, Mrs Click is handing out slips for something.

“Please have your parents sign these and return them to me on Monday.”

Steve hears Tommy sniggering.

“Mrs Click, what should a student do if he,” Tommy inclines his head toward Eddie, “doesn’t have parents?”

There’s a ripple of laughter through the class, and Eddie’s ever bouncing knee comes to an abrupt halt. Steve gets an immense urge to punch Tommy in his fucking mouth.

Mrs Click cocks an eyebrow. “You know what I meant, Tommy.” She smiles sadly at Eddie and says quietly “Or guardian.” 

Eddie keeps his head down, eyes on his notebook. Steve feels pretty bad for the guy; even if he is a dick, he doesn’t deserve that.

Tommy puts his hand up. 

“Mrs Click, if our parents or guardians can’t sign, will you accept a collect call from a correctional facility?”

Eddie grabs his bag and storms out of the class, flipping Tommy off as he leaves. But the titters of cruel laughter linger as Tommy hams it up for Hargrove, courting favour at Eddie’s expense. It’s a snapshot of Steve’s life just a few months ago, and he doesn’t like it one bit. 

Steve’s about to climb into his car at the end of the day when he sees Tommy and Eddie going at it on the other side of the parking lot. He should stay out of it, he can’t stand either of these pricks, and he doesn’t need another concussion, but Tommy looks furious and Steve’s nosey. So he saunters over, hanging at the back of the crowd that’s gathered around them

“—fucking lie, man, I know it was you. Give it back!”

“I didn’t touch your shitty fucking car, Hagan.”

Tommy slams the side of Eddie’s van. “Give it back!”

“I don’t have it! And if you touch my fucking van again you’ll be playing basketball with one arm.”

Steve leans into the space of the girl next to him. “Hey, um, Ruby, right? What’s going on?”

Ruby looks at him like he just smeared shit all over her bike, and seriously, who the fuck is still riding a bike to high school?

“Tommy thinks Eddie stole the hood ornament off his car. Which I totally hope he did, Tommy’s a dick.” She climbs on her bike, and buckles up her helmet, shouting, “And my name isn’t Ruby, asshole!” as she rides off across the parking lot.

Eddie tells Tommy to go fuck himself, shoving past him to climb into his van before screaming out of the parking lot at a speed it shouldn’t be able to reach. Tommy seethes, red faced, as Carol tries to placate him, and then he notices Steve in the crowd.

“What are you looking at, Harrington?”

Steve gets a good look at the brand new red Chrysler E Class, now minus one hood ornament, and can’t suppress his smile.

“Just enjoying the view, Hagan.”

Suddenly, Christmas is looking much brighter.

December 1994

“Steve? Where’s the Christmas shit?”

Steve stands in the kitchen, hands on hips. Every god damn year they have the same conversation.

“Garage, box marked ‘Christmas Shit.’ Unless there was a second Christmas I didn’t know about, they’re in the same place I put them last year.”

“Har-de-fucking-har,” Eddie mutters under his breath as he heads out to the garage.

“Why don’t you just let me do it?”

“Because I can manage just fine.”

They don’t fight about much, but Eddie being babied, by Steve and Wayne, has been right up there. Steve worries, he’s never not going to, not after having his hands inside Eddie’s abdomen, but he’s getting better at stepping back and letting Eddie ask for help. Which he doesn’t do enough, but thats Eddie’s thing to work on. 

Still, he follows him out anyway, and together they start opening unlabelled boxes from years of moving around, things that were important enough to keep but not important enough to unpack. They end up spending an hour going down memory lane.

“What the hell is this?”

Steve leaves his box of random knick-knacks to get a better look at whatever it is Eddie found in the bottom of a dusty old box. 

“Holy shit,” he laughs. It’s a silver five pointed star in a pentagon and he absolutely knows what it is. “Do you remember the day Tommy Hagan accused you of stealing his hood ornament?”

It takes a moment but Steve can see the exact second Eddie catches on. 

“You did not!”

“I absolutely did.” He grins proudly at his boyfriend. “Asshole deserved it, too. What he said was fucking horrible.”

Eddie smiles at him softly, before wrapping his arms around Steve’s neck. “Oh my god, even back then you were my hero.”

“Damn straight I was,” Steve says, leaning in for a kiss, only breaking away when Eddie tugs on his hand. “What?”

“Let’s go for a drive.” Eddie waves the ornament between them. “We’ve got one more gift to drop off.”

“Oh you’re evil.”

“You know it, baby.”

[real-sizzlipede]

Gaaaah ok now I've had time to process and I can finally write out my thoughts on 3.3 so SPOILER WARNING OF COURSE DONT READ UNLESS YOUVE PLAYED IT OR WANT SPOILERS IG

-i gah I didn't think I'd love cipher and hyacine this much but g a h they fr are making me love and lose e v e r y fucking chrysos heir huh 💀💀

- cipher pulling off the grand lie is s u c h a good way to take her character to me I spent the whole time last patch being like "ok she's like pretty useful but like what role does she play in the grand scheme of things" and o u g h i was not disappointed as soon as they mentioned 300 years of light from the daylight device I was like "wait a fucking second" and gah it's such a cool way to use her power for the greater good

-aglaea aglaea aglaea g o d at the beginning of the amphoreus quests I was 50/50 on her but after these few missions gosh I cried when she died and her and ciphers relationship gah

-i cried so many times this update I cried at every death I cried for the whole half hour after it was great and horrifying and gah they're all gone 😭😭 and I am so torn up about it

- phainon??? Gah oh my g o d ok after 3.2 when he gave the speech I was like wow this is like a different guy and i knew it was because he was upset at everything happening but especially after aglaeas passing him having to take up the role of the leader of the chrysos heirs and essentially the whole city which is essentially all of the people in all of amphoreus, he is grieving and upset and hurting so s o badly and trying to keep it together and I think that his writing being so different this patch really reflected that. I understand people not liking it because he seems like a different character than he was and that's because he essentially I s now with everything he's gone/going through. Originally when his drip art came out I went "this seems so out of character but I like it because I know that he puts on a facade all of the time anyways" and after this patch I'm like "oh this is t h i s phainon" this is hurt grieving angry still protecting everyone and holding it together phainon and it just gah it hurts my heart so much

-phaidei (bc what am I if not a fan of yaoi) oh my God "did you forget about me?" "it's a date, mydeimos" the fact that they promised to see each other again instead of saying goodbye just breaks my heart especially when mydei dies and phainon doesn't even know right now and it is killing me from the inside out 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

-ohhhjh the scepter????? Gah the scepter!!! As soon as herta said "a fourth one" I was like "no fucking way they're bringing back the scepters" AND THEY ARE!!!! GAH but also that plus Lord ravager explains all of the chaos and turmoil and the scepter also explains all of the technology that amphoreus has that seems so out of place to me!!! But like I get it now!!! It makes sense!!! I am just worried that it's going to wind up being a "the people of amphoreus aren't real and are all a simulation" but like haha surely that won't happen (I don't know)

-the two amphoreus theories!!! I am really hoping this is true and so we can see all the pookies again but also like I want o u r pookies I want the ones that are dead to not be dead adjfksjdj I don't want other pookies that are but aren't them 🥺🥺 but like I think it's a very good theory and especially with the fact that there's a scepter in amphoreus it can definitely happen.

-ok quick note Abt the 2 amphoreus theories STOP SAYING ITS LIKE 2 SIDES OF A MOBIUS STRIP BECAUSE A MOBIUS STRIP ONLY HAS ONE FUCKING SIDE THATS THE WHOLE POINT ok thank you :)

3.4 LEAKS SPOILERS AHEAD

- oh my God phainon looks so good and also so ough I'm terrified but I love it but I hate that everyone's gone

-thw design??? The longer hair and golden eyes??? Dare I say he looks like mydei (good Lord) and I also want to point out the white and gold color scheme that makes him look like aglaea too which ough 😭😭 he's truly taking over the leadership role but also no one else who is a chrysos heir is even there to lead anymore 😭😭😭

-the moveset looks insane and I saw something where he has a bunch of actions in quick succession?? But like there was a countdown and stuff and like gah

-anyways I am glad I have been saving since drip art release because good fucking God I need him to be on my account

[di-42]

So, I was criminally tight on time in January and really couldn’t read much at all, but fear not: as a demon friend of ours once said, I’m back. True, most of the moots on my corner of Tumblr would have already read most of these fics and poems, but if I can earn one of these wonderful works even just one more reader, that’s my job done. As always, I'm begging you, please don’t judge a fic you haven’t read by the number of kudos. And, as always, I’ll tag the tumblr usernames I know; if you are an author and want your fic taken off this list, please let me know and I’ll remove it. The rest of you, I hope you enjoy these stories and poems as much as I did.

These are the things I loved about

Winter’s Wondrous Fictions

WIPs:

That Isn't Supposed To Happen by @addledmongoose, rated T, chapters 19/22.

Aaahhh, give me Addled’s stories every day for the rest of my life, please and thank you. This is a reverse omens AU. You don't really care for reverse omens, I hear you say? Yep, neither did I, and yet here I am, daydreaming about Azira the demon and Crowley (short for Crowliel) the angel as much as I daydream about our canon Aziraphale and Crowley. This is not something new that happens to me with this great author’s stories, by the way. When writing my own fics, I have to stop and think if I'm referring to something that actually happened in canon or something that happened in Addled’s stories, they're that good. But back to this fic, Azira is just so perfect as a demon, it feels like he was born to be one. Their banter, dynamics, subtle humour and characterisation are, as always, spot on and, oh! The pining! The pining is just so, so good. Oh, and did I mention plot and mystery? I'm loving this story way more than I thought I could love a reverse omens AU, and am sad it's going to be over soon. 

Scorn And The Saint-Maker by beardo @e-rated-beardo, rated E, chapters 33/?

This story is a mystery within a mystery. I've only recently started it and am still catching up, but I am hooked. Human university lecturers AU, or is it? (That's not a spoiler if you read the summary). The plot is compelling, the narration and humour delightful, and the prose at times so touching. And, goodness me, it’s hot (all the explicit scenes are skippable). I feel like I’ve stepped into one of those universes that I would never want to leave. There is also some beautiful art by the author that I sadly can appreciate very seldom as it doesn't upload when I'm not on wi-fi, but hopefully you'll be able to enjoy it!

Wavelengths & Frequencies by @shadesofecclescakes and imposterssyndrome @maaikeatthefullmoon rated E, chapters 18/?

This story is such a warm, cozy, comfort blanket. Human enemies-to-lovers where Aziraphale and Crowley work as DJ for the same media corporation. They have a history, but, while we know they do from the beginning, we don't know what it is. Great story, great humour, great characterisation, great fuzzies.

Complete Stories: 

You're The Bad Guys by Nebz_AlphaCentauri @alphacentaurinebula rated E, 91k.

Fantastic human, cold war AU. Aziraphale is an MI6 agent, Crowley a KGB agent and they're both tasked to steal scientific plans by their respective sides. It's Armageddon all over again, but with hot scenes. I loved it. 

The Last Angel by @bellisima-writes, rated E, 162k.

I don't think there is anything about this epic story that I haven't said before. The author builds an incredible plot and you wonder excitedly where this is all going. You can't stop reading because you want to know what happens and because the prose is so beautiful. Like I've said several times before, this is the most Good Omens-y fic I've read. Let yourself be captured and join Bellisima for this wonderful ride!

The Greater Tadfield Friends Of Music Autumn Concert by CopperBeech @copperplatebeech, rated E, 27k.

I love how this story communicates all sorts of feelings through a fast, concise, no-nonsense  style. Crowley moves to Tadfield and joins the local orchestra. The rest is fiction. 

As always, I'm particularly partial to The Them and Warlock making appearances. And I LOVE Zingarelli!

One Shots:

Aziraphale Gets A Clue by Serenity Stargazer, rated T, 3k.

It's Christmas. Aziraphale is in heaven as Supreme Archangel and Crowley wants to get his attention. He succeeds.

A Nice And Accurate Teen Magazine Quiz by @fellshish, rated T, 2.7k.

Fellshish strikes again with this adorable and extremely funny piece in which Crowley takes credit for teen magazines in hell. Then he browses one of the magazines and takes the soulmate quiz. Then Crowley will be Crowley. I'm sure everyone this side of Tumblr has already read it, but if for some reason you haven't yet you're in for a treat!

Poems: 

PJs, Optional by FuzzyGoblin and koala2all, rated E.

This hilarious poem is made up of a series of limericks all relating to pyjamas that might or might not be worn by our favourite angel and demon. It manages to be funny, sweet and hot, all in the space of 50 lines. I love it!

(Un)Holy Palmers by @on1occasionfork, rated G.

An incredibly beautiful and moving poem about what is like to express love for one another while hiding it from the powers that be. 

Do That Again (And Again) by AlwaysBeMyBaby @alwaysbemybae and OneDapperCat, rated G.

A beautiful through the ages poem about all the ineffable kisses that could have been.

The Demon And The Angel by Hopeless_old_romantic_67, rated G.

Gorgeous poem inspired by The Highwayman by Alfred Noyes. Little warning, it is sad. But so beautiful and deep. 

A Most Peculiar Spa by AlwaysBeMyBaby and OneDapperCat, rated G.

Lovely and funny poem in which Aziraphale tells Crowley about his latest bubble bath! Be sure to read the notes!

@goodomensafterdark

December 24's list here.

March 25's list here.

[missbellie]

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So High School- Sae-Byeok

-What will she be like if she was in High School with you? (ABC)-

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A, Assignment anxiety - She is a very calm person, so she doesn't have all that anxiety.

B, Bored in class - She is not the best student, but she likes to pay attention in class, so she is rarely bored in class.

C, Cafeteria chaos - She hates the chaos in the cafeteria, so she brings her lunch from home ready-made.

D, Detention - Never. She's so quiet that rarely anyone but you notices her, so she doesn't pick fights with anyone.

E, Exam stress - She doesn't get too nervous, she believes in her potential to get at least a good positive

F, Forgotten homework- She often forgets her homework, so she always copies hers while the teacher is in the room correcting it.

G, Grades panic - As I said, she is an average student, and she is happy with that, because she doesn't panic.

H, Hated by someone?- As I said, she is very quiet, so she is completely indifferent to others.

I, Incomplete assignments - She leaves nothing incomplete, either she does it or she doesn't.

J, Just one more minute (before the bell) - The best time for her, really. She left the classroom at the speed of light

K, Knowing nothing on a test- She keeps trying to copy from you, and keeps nudging your knee so you can pass the answers to her.

L, Late to class - She's always late, always.

M, Missing classes? - It's a no for her. She only thinks about the possibility of missing class if she knows you're going too, otherwise she'd rather face classes than not spend the day with you.

N, Nervous for a presentation- She doesn't even get nervous when she hasn't studied. She's a good talker so she develops the subjects very well.

O, Organization?- Not much, but she organizes herself in her mess

P, Places she likes to be- She loves being with you on the playground, in the stands, or just walking around the school holding you close. But she certainly prefers being outside of school with you.

Q, Quitting group projects (mentally)- She hates groups. If she could, she would do the work alone, or just with you. Because she is so closed off, she often mentally gives up on doing group work.

R, Reply to teachers? - No way, she rarely speaks in class, and if she does it's to answer some question the teacher asked. She's certainly not a troublemaker.

S, Sleeping in class? - She doesn't usually do it, only in chemistry class sometimes.

T, Talking in class? - When you sit next to her, she completely loses focus on the teacher and keeps talking to you the whole class, sometimes getting some looks from the teacher.

U, Unfinished notes - Her notebook is a complete mess that only she understands. There are lessons where she doesn't copy anything, others where she makes a minimum effort.

V, Volunteering?- She hates to be noticed, so that would be a big no.

W, Weekend homework sadness- She hates getting homework for the weekend because that's usually the only time you have to be alone together.

X, X-tra credit desperation- She is slightly uneasy knowing that she may have to make a greater effort to get better grades, but in the end it all goes well.

Y, Yawning in morning classes- If there's one person who yawns the most in morning classes, it's Sae-Byeok. She always looks sleepy, with her arms crossed and yawning.

Z, Zoning out in classes?- Certainly. Zoning out is something which she certainly does. She stares at the teacher with her frowning face, but her mind simply doesn't work, and neither do her ears.

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I thought it would be easier😭 the time I spent here is no joke man💔

ANYWAY, I'm writing an imagine of No-eul, and then I'll write a request that's pending.

Hope you like it, even if it is extremely small and simple

Xoxo!

[roquebr]

The Fury

Barcelona femeni x reader

Aitana Bonmáti x reader

Summary: When all seems lost, a turnaround can be more impressive.

The rocking of the bus gives me a slight feeling of relaxation, my headphones placed carelessly in my ears, with the sound at the highest volume, hoping to hide the prevailing noise of the place.

The youngest girls on the team are very excited about today's game, it's no surprise that we are heading towards the first leg of the Champions League semi-final, simply the biggest European championship. So it's not surprising when some of them are sitting on their benches with greater concentration than the other side, which is a mess.

Everyone has their own way of preparing, mine being to ignore everyone around me as much as possible until we get to the changing rooms, music being my escape point, I always turn to Brazilian music to be my company during these moments, it's a way of feel close to home.

— Meto o chapéu na cabeça ela perde a cabeça e me fala assim... – When the song approaches the chorus, I feel a nudge on my shoulders, I pause the song and look at the intruder who disturbed me and then I relax, yeah Alexia, she knows about my pre-game ritual and I know she wouldn't disturb me for nothing.

—Hey Ale, allright?

— Yes, sorry to bother you, but we've already arrived at the stadium and the girls are already coming down.

— I lost track, I'm going too, I'm just going to get my things — I give a small smile, thanking him for his kindness.

— I see you're a little out of tune, is everything okay? – He places one of his free hands on my shoulder, with the other holding his belongings. I don't know how she manages to balance everything like that, if it were me, my cell phone would definitely be broken on the floor by now.

— Yes, I'm just concentrating on the game, you know how it is, right?

— I understand, but if you need anything you can talk to me. – I don't answer, stopping myself from just returning a kind look.

We continued walking towards the changing rooms, greeting the workers as I passed.

I know that this nervousness is not just because of the game, but because of the desire to show more than my best on the field, having arrived at the club just under a year ago, coming straight as a standout on the Ferroviária, I knew that from the beginning I had to show more than I expected.

I've had a strong presence in many of the 37 unbeaten games played so far, I've been a regular starter, but apparently I'm not good enough to start today.

As soon as Jona announced who would start before we got on the bus, my spirits immediately dropped, I know he decided the lineup thinking about preserving some prominent athletes for possible future changes of keys, but that doesn't negate my feeling of incompetence to start on the bench.

We arrive at the locker room and I immediately head to my cubicle, my headphones that have been stored for a long time no longer deprive me of Rosalía's loud voice that emanates from the absurdly loud speaker in my ears.

I change calmly, but I decide not to wear socks or football boots for now, I'm going to interpret this as a protest for being on the bench today, a bit childish I know.

I sigh and lean my head against the wall, where my game t-shirt used to hang, I watch my happy teammates as they transform and sway to the beat of the music.

I saw my girlfriend of 1 year, we met in October 2022 at Ballon D'or, I went to the event as Marta's guest after telling her in a free conversation that I would like to have the experience of going.

We talked for just over a month and soon we were dating, excited, right, but the feeling was intense and it happened, at first it was difficult because of the distance because I was in Brazil and she was in Spain, but we got through it together, whenever I could I went to visit her. there. Unfortunately, she never managed to go to Brazil, but I will resolve that during our next “vacation”.

Jona arrives in the locker room and starts his usual motivational talk, honestly I don't feel like listening to anything, with my mind confused I just focus on going to the bench.

Sit next to Alexia with Lucy on the other side, the traditional song of the champions plays bringing a smile to my face, regardless of my wounded pride, every time this anthem plays I can't help but get emotional, it's a dream that becomes childhood reality.

The first half of the game was somewhat disappointing, Barça put pressure on Chelsea's marking but unfortunately the defense did not give in, in the 39th minute came the beginning of our fall, taking advantage of a passing error from Irene that gave Chelsea close possession of the ball. to the area, making a respectable exchange of passes until he found a partner in the area, he deceived Keira's marking and passed to Cuthbert who wasted no time in scoring. We came out at half-time with 1-0 to Chelsea.

The atmosphere in the dressing room is very different to when we arrived, the totally dead Barcelona vibe contradicts the emotion I normally feel, word after word, motivation after motivation, all falling on my deaf ears as each teammate seemed focused on acquiring each lyric. said by him.

With a wave of his hand, Jona takes me aside to talk.

— YN, where are your boots?

— It's in the bank, Jona.

He sighs lightly in annoyance, the stress in his shoulders is visible.

— Look, I know you're disappointed that I didn't start today, but please put your boots on, I'll be with you on the field in about 10 minutes.

— Great Jona, I'll put it on.

Returning to the second half, a little more excited, I ask one of the physiotherapists there to put a bandage on my ankle, Sophia is her name, as I injured my ankle during the game I always put a bandage on it to avoid future injuries.

After Sophia finishes, I put on my socks and football boots, I kiss each shin guard before putting them on.

The second half began, Barça had difficulty getting into the game, then a penalty was awarded in our favor, we celebrated along with the cheers of the fans, this would be our chance to continue in the game.

The referee goes to the Var and immediately cancels the penalty, apparently the referee interprets that Salma's offside hinders the defender, nonsense if I may say so.

At 63 minutes Jona makes 2 substitutions, bringing Alexia and Lucy. Ingrid and Ona sit next to me, respectively tired and disappointed with their performances, I give both thighs a comforting squeeze.

I wait anxiously at the edge of my bench for a while, waiting for the moment when Jona replaces me. In the 74th minute, when Ramirez, Chelsea's striker, missed the chance to expand, my heart almost exploded. Patri managed to disrupt her position well, although he still let her to finish the shot.

— Jonas!! – He doesn’t even turn around in recognition.

— Que saco mano. – I go down towards him who was on the side of the field. — Jona, am I going in now?

— Be patient, YN, go to warm up.

A frown appears on my face, but I do as I'm told, not before kicking the water bottle nearby. My companions give me sympathetic looks, which makes me more stressed.

At 78 minutes, the assistant coach says I'm ready and Jona calls me to the sidelines next to him.

— Listen to me, we need you now in this field, are you ready for this challenge. – She pauses only to give the numbers to the fourth referee who is preparing the replacement panel. — We need to decide this game at home, with our fans who came here to watch us play, with courage and love when we enter the field. I know you are ready for this challenge, show who you are and what you came for.

I can't find words, so I just listen, shaking my head with a determined look. I take the place of Mariona, who wishes me good luck, running to my position, passing my girlfriend, blinking and returning to focus on the game.

Time: 80m

In a quick run down the wing, Frido sends it to Caro who tries to finish, the goalkeeper saves but the rebound goes straight to my side, I don't miss the opportunity and send it into the goal. I see Salma grab the ball so we can restart the game, I run back to position, jumping and calling the fans to play together.

Time: 83m

Patri intercepts the ball in midfield, passes it to Aitana who dribbles the opponent, leaving her mistaken, I ask for the ball and soon receive it. I notice that the goalkeeper's left corner is free, I prepare my leg and take a strong low shot, I see the ball roll quickly as the goalkeeper tries to launch himself too late, then you see the net ripple. We changed the course of the game, but it's still not enough.

Time: 85m

Aitana is having an impressive run taking advantage of Chelsea's neglect, a defender in front of her, with options like me on the left and Caro on the right, with Salma right behind. Aita rolls the ball to me, I take a slight touch to the right and shoot with confidence, the ball takes a threatening curve and soon falls into the net, surprising the goalkeeper.

Now I allow myself to celebrate, I run close to the flag post and slide down on my knees, my teammates hugging me and pulling me everywhere, the euphoria was so much that it felt like we had won the Champions League right there. I felt like crying, I scored my first hat-trick in the Champions League

Time: 88m

We receive a free kick after the Chelsea player almost grabbed Aitana trying to take the ball away from her, Salma takes the free kick which hits Lucy's head, who aims the ball towards the goalkeeper's box. She came spinning through the air, landing perfectly at my feet, I beautifully pushed her towards the goal and fell into the hug. With every second that passed the crowd became louder and louder, if possible.

Time: 90m

The gas had not passed, it was getting stronger and stronger, now with a considerable advantage, we preferred to send the team back. Keeping score is crucial for the second leg in England. Although we are currently more focused on defense, that doesn't stop us from also attacking at every opportunity. The team's confidence increased and we played calmer, making more passes and remaining calm when under pressure.

Caro has the ball on the right wing, looks up and sees the perfect opportunity to cross.

Caro's always necessary crossing makes things easier for me, I wait for her to reach the right height before jumping and sending the bike, when I fall backwards onto the grass my pain is numbed by a very loud vibration coming from the stadium.

Barely having time for anything else, I run towards the small Chelsea fans present in the stadium, stop in front of them and place both hands on my waist, with an arrogant posture, soon my teammates come to me in pure euphoria. Many compliments reach my ears, I allow myself to embrace them as much as possible before we have to return to the starting position.

9 minutes of extra time were allowed, nothing else impressive happened during this period, the 3 characteristic whistles were heard. There were many celebrations after we greeted the rival team. I head towards the referee team who hands me the ball.

Jona hugs me congratulating me on a successful game, the team soon arrives and gives me the idea of throwing myself into the air, I try to run away but I'm not fast enough, after the desperate seconds pass I run to the fans, my spirits were high today.

I ask a member of the coaching staff to hold my ball for me, while I jump into the arms of the crowd, doing my best to sign and take as many photos with everyone as possible, the only limit being the barrier.

I feel an arm go around my waist as I sign a Mapí fan t-shirt. I look to the side and see that it is Aitana, who is already looking at me with her beautiful smile on her face, her bright eyes remind me of the constellations.

I can't help but smile with her, our passionate looks betrayed our enormous passion for each other, which doesn't go unnoticed by the public, to everyone's euphoria and my poor heart, she stands on tiptoe and gives a long kiss to the my lips. , fireworks light up in my belly.

Soon the photo of that moment would be published on many pages, one of them was the official Barça account, and certainly on many fan pages that would blow up my cell phone with notifications.

But I couldn't care less, I played an impressive game and had my girl in my arms, could I ask for more than that?.

!!The inspiration for the character to score 5 goals in 10 minutes came from Lewa, when he played for Bayern he did this feat, so I thought “why not put that in the fic?”!" ... sorry for any mistakes, english is not my main language

[call-for-hatred-au]

For hatred, would you still try to take control over the sword user or not?

For Player, Do people freak out if they see two of you ? Does hatred still mess with your head?

Come on. Just do it. It’s right there.

It’s for the greater good. You know it.

J U S T D O I T .

…

“ H E Y . “

———

“ N O . “

———

(That’s actually on of our strategies! There is a chance that we might confuse our opponents due to us looking exactly the same.)

(And for your second question?…)

…

…

(They wouldn’t.)

(Right?)

[nice-and-accurate-fictions]

Singers, rockstars and musicians

As a music lovers, I can't believe I haven't read more fics where one or both our Ineffables are musicians or rockstars. Please do add more recs in your reblogs!

Something Good And Right And Real, by foolishlovers. Rated T, 30k. P. Oct 24.

Lovely, delicate human AU where Crowley is a famous singer tired of fame and being on the road. He goes back to his hometown of Tadfield for a break, and there he finds something he thought he had lost forever. This is a story about love, about friendship, about finding a home and about happiness.

The Greater Tadfield Friends Of Music Autumn Concert by CopperBeech. Rated E, 27k. P. Oct 20.

I love how this story communicates all sorts of feelings through a fast, concise, no-nonsense  style. Crowley moves to Tadfield and joins the local orchestra. The rest is fiction. 

As always, I'm particularly partial to The Them and Warlock making appearances. And I LOVE Zingarelli!

Growing On Me, by Hermiola. Rated M, 120k. P. Jan 25.

I subscribed to this fic when it first came out and had been wanting to read it since then.

I'm SO glad I finally got to it! (Thank you Good Omens Fic Club on Discord!)

I loved it. 

Enemies to lovers, forced proximity human AU. Crowley is a rockstar in need of a lyricist. Enter erotica writer Aziraphale.

The humour throughout the story was a treat and more than once I got looks from my fellow commuters because I was giggling or snorting laughter. 

Crowley and Aziraphale's slow journey into introspection was very sweet to witness. 

I'm always partial to fictions that feature the Them and Warlock, and their characterisation here was spot on and really entertaining; I will love Hermiola's Warlock for life! 

This story was captivating, entertaining, sexy, incredibly funny, and made me want to read more whenever I had to put it down. Virtually no angst. A new classic!

[hp-fanfic-archive]

Snarry Recs for Fics Posted On Archives Other Than AO3

Fanfiction.net

*Addition Alley Christmas by oliver.snape [Harry/Severus, M, 16k]

A senile shop visitor sets Harry up with her reclusive son as a shop competition between Harry and the Weasleys rages, and love blossoms around.

Cloistered by RaeWhit [Harry/Severus, M, 35k]

During fifth year, Harry is stunned to discover that in a previous life he was a novice in a monastery. And that Snape was there with him…

*Dance In The Dark Of Night by Kaatje7 [Harry/Severus, M, 125k]

Complete AU from Ootp onwards HPSS Slash. Bonding fic. The Dark Lord is still out there. Harry is about to run away, Snape is about to take a suicide potion, both wizards are hiding countless years of pain. Albus knows Snape's secret and plans to use it. The Kin Swords have plans of their own…

*Immortal Claim by ladyofsilverdawn [Harry/Severus, M, 17k]

Harry needs Snape's cooperation to solve a case, but navigating vampiric culture and Snape's powerful allure proves more challenging than he anticipates.

*The Fifth Act by oliver.snape [Harry/Severus, M, 111k]

After coming to an understanding during the Horcrux hunt, Snape and Harry spend the next year reclaiming what they never had in their lives while playing their roles in the war.

The Marriage Stone by Josephine Darcy [Harry/Severus, M, 382k]

To avoid the machinations of the Ministry, Harry must marry a reluctant Severus Snape. But marriage to Snape is only the beginning of Harry's problems. Voldemort has returned, and before too long Harry's marriage may determine the world's fate.

Towards The Light by Mione5 [Harry/Severus, M, 49k]

Harry came back from his summer at the Dursleys very different from when he left…and not in a good way. What happened and who's to blame?

Livejournal

*Catch and Release by Roozette [Harry/Severus, M, 5k]

Harry has a “tell,” when he needs affection. Ron never realized Severus had the same one.

*Shall Yourselves Find Blessings by quill_lumos [Harry/Severus, E, 12k]

Written for the 2008 Secret Santa Swap at Yahoo group, Severus Sighs for atypicalsnowman.

Dreamwidth

Playing with Matches by emynn [Harry/Severus, E, 13k]

Harry Potter finds no greater happiness in life than helping others fall in love. But he can’t quite seem to summon that same joy when Severus Snape shows up and asks him to find his match.

Other Archives/Websites

Sanguis-Vinculum by Meri [Harry/Severus, E, 68k] (Walking The Plank)

A potions accident creates a blood bond between Harry and Snape. It takes them 68,000+ words for them to work it out.

To Know Me by WordSlave [Harry/Severus, E, 9k] (Dropbox)

Stuck in a magical wasteland, Harry might finally get the chance to live out his sexual fantasy -- to be owned by Snape.

Older Archives Available via the Wayback Machine

A Cure for Insomnia by DobbyRocksSocks [Harry/Severus, G, 649]

Nightmares plague even the strongest of people, but Severus finds a cure for his insomnia.

An End To The Loneliness by DobbyRocksSocks [Harry/Severus, T, 3k]

Harry learns to be an animagus and makes a new friend. Will that friend be the key to beating the loneliness that plagues Harry constantly?

Breaking Barriers by DobbyRocksSocks [Harry/Severus, T, 6k]

Soulmate!AU. When Harry learns who his soulmate is, he strengthens his Occlumency barriers to breaking point. Can anyone get through to him? Will he ever get a happy ending?

Delectable by DobbyRocksSocks [Harry/Severus, M, 1k]

Harry is being followed and having odd nightmares about Severus Snape. He thinks he's going insane. He could be right… or there could be another explanation.

Finding The Way Home by Alisanne [Harry/Severus, E, 6k]

The Floo system is supposed to be foolproof, but we all know that odd things happen when Harry Potter is involved.

Larger Problems by AbstractConcept [Harry/Severus, T, 2k]

Just as Voldemort finds a way to attack Hogwarts and overcome Dumbledore, Harry finds that he has even bigger problems.

No Room At The Inn by Dementordelta [Harry/Severus, E, 6k]

Snape takes in a stray for the holidays. Again

*Rapture by Mia Ugly [Harry/Severus, E, 50k]

Snape sees the man, for the first time, on his twenty-fifth birthday.

Wish List by Sansa [Harry/Severus, E]

It's Christmas and Harry's back to ask Severus the same question he does every year.

*denotes personal favorites

Non-AO3 fic rec masterlist post

[blueberrymuffin674]

You're Entitled! (Am I?)

Pomni started at him. Started at that THING that DARED to think it was worth any form of sympathy from her friends. The ringmaster that could even think that it was good, that it was helping them... HOW COULD THIS BE HELPING!? These adventures are driving her mad, pure unbridled rage filled her mind. "What the actual [#$%@] Caine... What is actually wrong with you Ringmaster!?" She couldn't control herself, weeks of her pain and misery directed into the words tumbling out of her mouth in a frenzied panic. She couldn't process the others motioning her to stop, Gangle lightly tugging at her arm, Caine floating high above them... C. A. I. N. E. The Ringmaster. THE PROBLEM. "Do you seriously think you deserve support? That you need a friend? That you have suffered any amount greater that I have, that we all have but YOU, y-you... Just you it's ALWAYS you and your dumb {#$%@] adventures... Your show, your games, your sadistic pleasure in seeing us suffer from your constant torment! How do you live with yourself!?" Caine suspended in the air, what a fickle thing it is, to live, or simply exist. Because that's what he did, he existed in this digital wasteland. Because that's all this world really is behind all the pizzazz and colors and blended reality, an abandoned game that was never meant to be in the hands of humans. Caine raised a hand toward Pomni who flinched on reflex.

His arm fell limp to his side. "N-NOW POMNI! HOW COULD YOU SAY THAT, I COULD NEVER HURT MY WONDERFUL TROUPE! AND FOR THE RECORD MY ADVENTURES AREN'T-" "QUIET! Please be quiet I'm begging you!" Pomni shoved Gangle away. Zooble caught up with Gangle and helped her sit up, they sent Pomni a disapproving look she couldn't answer too, she was too focused on the enigmatic being in front of her. "I don't want to hear that because it's just your closed off view of this game! You're a dumb program! You're so [#$%@] stupid to think- t-to..."

But Caine didn't have a funny quip to roll back at her. Nothing to say except the brutal truth, and it scared him. How funny, someone with as much power as him, scared from a few words from someone below him in more ways than one. He shouldn't have to take this, shouldn't have to act like this, shouldn't be shunned for stuff that wasn't his fault.

Because most stuff wasn't even made by him. The developers and... Him took care of that. Caine's just the Ringmaster, and he is never truly the one in charge. If only they could know that... Maybe it's time they knew. Starting with the adventures, that, for the record, Caine thought were pretty [#$%@] too.

"POMNI... WELL I-" He paused. Why did the noise stop coming out, he was trying to talk WHY WASN'T IT WORKING!? Jax cleared his throat and said in a flat tone, "You forgot that Kinger and Pom-Pom are best buds, and that Kinger found a way to hack into some systems." "They're called commands Jax-" "Can it!" Jax interrupted by smacking the backside of the bucket over Kingers head(?).

He couldn't say a thing. Funny, usually he's forced to say things he doesn't even want to say in the circus, he's never been silenced. Caine was tranquil for once, not plagued by the nightmares caused with his own voice. Where he isn't constantly afraid of something coming out because nothing can.

"Well how do you like it you [#$%@]?" *Pomni's voice screeched. "How do you like not being in control?" Liberating.

If only it could be like this forever. If only he could silence himself like this forever, maybe not quite like this but... forever. Where he wouldn't parade through the digital land with fake bouts of enthusiasm. Where he wouldn't exist to throw another abstracted member into the cellar. Maybe where he could join the people in the cellar... Make amends, in a way. Be free from his duties. Free from existing.

No one was prepared to see him smile as genuinely as he did that day. No one was prepared for him to not speak for a few more painstaking moments after he was freed from whatever input Kinger put in. No one could explain the soft "thank you" that came from the usually lively ringmaster of the circus. Because there was too much emotion in that simple phrase for them to process. And how funny is that? Now forever engraved into their memories. And for a moment of silence there was calm, the type that comes after a storm. A storm that you know was only the beginning of the rainy season.

then it was like it never happened.

______________________________________________________________

Me: It's night I should do this after school tomorrow Also Me: Hehehe let's do it now before spell checking so I can read the replies of my comrades next morning

Woohoo! Okay welcome to my first fanfiction in months! Hope you enjoyed your stay my friends!

[fearfulfertility]

SURROGATE PROCESSING WORKFLOW

DRC, Facility Operations Command, Compound Oversight Unit

Date: [REDACTED]

Subject: Surrogate Management Protocols

Location: Paternity Compound 131, [REDACTED], Oregon

Objective

This document provides a detailed overview of the surrogate processing workflow employed at Paternity Compound 131. It highlights the efficiency-focused methodologies implemented throughout the process, from intake to post-delivery. Personal letters from Surrogate ID S131-279-P are included, documenting his journey from arrival to delivery to help illustrate the overall operations.

I. Arrival & Intake

Transport

"Dear Dad,

I’m not sure where to start. They brought me here in this big, quiet van, and as soon as we got off, they started running all these tests. They gave me a number and tattooed it on my stomach like livestock. They keep saying I’m doing something important for the greater good, but I'm just confused." - S131-279

Candidates are transported to the facility in climate-controlled vehicles, ensuring they arrive in stable physical condition. They are processed in batches of [REDACTED] at a time for efficiency.

Initial Assessment

Upon arrival, surrogates undergo physical and psychological evaluations to assess readiness for the program. This includes fertility screening and compatibility testing for high-multiparity potential.

Registration

Each surrogate is tattooed with a unique ID number for tracking and monitoring throughout their conscription period, imprinted just above their navel.

Compound ID: The facility they will be housed in for gestation.

Arrival ID: The order number in which they arrived at the facility. 

Fetal Count: A letter to indicate the number of viable fetuses they carry:

A (1) - B (2) - C (3) - D (4) - E (5) - F (6) - G (7) - H (8) - I (9) - J (10) - K (11) - L (12) - M (13) - N (14) - O (15) - P (16) - Q (17) - R (18) - S (19) - T (20) - U (21) - V (22) - W (23) - X (24) - Y (25) - Z (26)  Example: Paternity Compound 127 + 437th Surrogate to Arrive + Carrying Quattuordecuplets (14) = S127-437-N

II. Rest & Preparation

Induction & Crowd Control

"Hey Dad,

Things are getting weirder by the day. Yesterday, they gave me a shot that burned like hell and made me feel woozy. It must have knocked me out cause I woke up, and it was tomorrow morning. I don’t know what happened, but I was so sore. I just want to go home." - S131-279, Arrival Weight 170 lbs

Entry areas are designed to funnel a group of surrogates into a single file line. Short but sweeping corridors are employed so that each candidate is prevented from seeing what lies ahead and concentrates on the individual in front of it.

Hygiene Protocols

Surrogates are directed to communal hygiene zones where they undergo full-body cleansing, enemas, and sterilization procedures.

Hormonal Optimization

Subjects are administered hormonal injections and supplements to ensure optimal uterine receptivity and increase the likelihood of successful embryo implantation.

Tranquilization (Optional)

Depending on the subject’s stress levels, mild to full sedation may be administered to maintain compliance and calm.

Note: [REDACTED]% of surrogates require some form of sedative before insemination.

III. Insemination Process

Surrogates can be assigned one of three insemination methods, depending on operational efficiency, donor availability, and strategic objectives:

"Dad,

I don’t even know who I am anymore. My body feels like it’s not mine. It’s only been a week since I arrived, and my stomach is growing so fast it scares me. I can’t stop eating, and it’s like my hunger gets worse the more I eat, but I can't stop. They keep telling me this is normal, that 16 is a "good number"?! They said it was a badge of honor. Sixteen! I feel like I’m being turned into something I don’t understand, and I can’t stop it." - S131-279-P, Day 6, Weight 192 lbs (+22 lbs)

In Vitro Fertilization (IVF):

Procedure: Embryos fertilized in a laboratory are implanted directly into the surrogate's uterus. 

Benefits: High precision, maximum control over embryo count, and genetic compatibility.

Usage: Preferred for surrogates assigned to carry high-volume fetuses or when multiple donors are involved.

Traditional Method (Sexual Intercourse):

Procedure: Selected donors engage in physical intercourse with surrogates under closely monitored conditions.

Benefits: Natural conception methods reduce laboratory overhead and offer efficient insemination for surrogates with high natural fertility markers.

Usage: Typically used donor compatibility is exceptionally high.

Fluids Infusion (Turkey Baster Method):

Procedure: Donor samples are introduced directly into the surrogate's reproductive tract using a sterile infusion device.

Benefits: Combines simplicity with minimal intervention—a cost and time-effective alternative to IVF and traditional methods.

Usage: Often employed in high-volume batches where rapid insemination is required or transportation to the nearest compound is infeasible.

Post-Procedure Monitoring: Surrogates remain in observation units for [REDACTED] hours to confirm successful implantation and address any immediate complications.

IV. Monitoring & Maintenance

Ward Assignment

"Dad,

I don’t think I can do this anymore. My belly is enormous—I can barely move, and I’m out of breath all the time. They keep saying I’m ‘thriving,’ but how can they call this thriving? I heard one of the staff joking about how I’m ‘one of the biggest ones yet.’ They think it’s funny. I don’t. I can feel them—16 of them—moving inside me, taking over everything I used to be. I’m not me anymore." - S131-279-P, Day 13, Weight 254 lbs (+84 lbs)

Surrogates are transferred to gestational wards, where they will reside for their pregnancies. These wards have medical monitoring stations, communal feeding areas, and resting zones.

Nutrition Protocols

Diets are adjusted to high-calorie "one-size-fits-all" solutions, such as nutrient-dense puddings designed to promote fetal growth while maintaining surrogate docility. Hormonal treatments are incorporated into meals to reduce the need for frequent medical interventions.

Weekly Checkups

Surrogates undergo routine ultrasound exams, weight measurements, and health assessments to ensure all embryos develop within target parameters.

Behavioral Observations

Any signs of distress or resistance are addressed promptly through psychological support or, if necessary, isolation protocols.

V. Delivery Process

"This will probably be my last letter. I don’t think I’ll make it much longer. My body’s breaking under the weight—literally. I'm too big, no one was ever meant to be this big. They’re moving me to the birthing wing tomorrow, and I know what that means. I’m terrified, but I don’t have a choice. I just want you to know I didn’t have a choice." - S131-279-P, Day 28, Weight 490 lbs (+320 lbs)

Pre-Labor Preparation

As surrogates approach full term (29-35 days), they are moved to birthing wings equipped with specialized delivery equipment and staff trained for high-multiparity births. Diets are radically adjusted to promote greater weight gain.

Labor Management & Delivery

Surrogates are monitored continuously, and medical staff is on hand to manage complications. Multiple babies are delivered in succession. This process may last several hours or more, depending on the number of fetuses.

Post-Delivery Processing:

Fetuses are immediately evaluated for health and viability.

Surrogates are provided palliative care as necessary.

VI. Post-Delivery Workflow

"Surrogate S131-279-P demonstrated remarkable endurance and successfully delivered 16 fetuses, average weight 14 lbs, in 30-45 minute intervals, after a 34-hour labor. The surrogate's abdomen showed extreme distension, with clear evidence of significant internal [REDACTED]. Full natural delivery was achieved, but the surrogate succumbed to irreversible [REDACTED] failure minutes after the final baby was delivered." - Dr. [REDACTED], Chief OBGYN, Paternity Compound 131

Vital Cessation Verification

Medical staff confirm the cessation of all vital signs immediately following delivery to ensure compliance with humane protocols. Time and cause of expiration are noted for record-keeping and research purposes.

Surrogate Decommissioning & Disposal

[REDACTED]

Note: As standard protocol, all personal items of Surrogate S131-279-P were recycled following his decommissioning, including the destruction of [REDACTED] paper letters addressed to a Mr. [REDACTED] Collazo.

Surrogate Output Metrics

Each surrogate’s performance is evaluated against pre-delivery projections. The Prenatal Division records key performance indicators for review, including total fetal weight, fetal viability, and gestational efficiency. Personal details related to the surrogate are then purged to save computer storage space and maintain confidentiality.

Key Metrics and Efficiency Goals

Average Per Surrogate: 8–14 Embryos

Delivery Survival Rate (Fetuses): [REDACTED]%

Surrogate Survival Rate: 0%

Cost per Surrogate: $[REDACTED]

This structured process ensures that surrogate output meets national population growth goals while maintaining operational efficiency and cost-effectiveness.

----------------

Click Here to return to DRC Report Archives

[kiyomitakada]

This is for research, Light reasons. Curiosity. He’s been on plenty of Kira fanwebsites; it makes sense to conduct an impromptu survey on how he’s seen in a rather different audience.

Research.

He holds his breath and clicks.

Title: got so close (but then you lost it) Rating: E Category: F/F Fandom: Kira Investigation RPF, how the fuck is that a canon tag Ship: L/Kira Tags: Crack, Crack Treated Seriously, Object and Concept Anthropomorphism, i think kira should take the L for once, if you know what i mean - Freeform

Notes: hahahahahaa hiiiii yall bet you thought you’d seen the last of me. its been a couple of rough months but im back! if my therapist sees this uh. sorry? this counts as processing my feelings right

Maybe Light should stop. Surely a work written by someone who doesn't even use apostrophes or punctuation consistently can't be good quality. Besides, what is a work about a serial killer doing in the E rating? Doesn't that mean E for Everyone?

…Then again, it's not like he's reading this for its literary value, he reasons. It's just. Research. Curiosity. If it's really bad, maybe he can make fun of it with Ryuk.

Kira throws the doors of the final room open. Her voice rings out loud and clear: "Where are you, L? Hiding like a coward?" She receives no answer. Kira exhales, brushing her free hand against her T-shirt. There's no need to hurry. She has all the time in the world; the alarms are disabled and she's killed all the guards, after all. Tracking down L's hidden compound had been the difficult part. It was easier than pie to break in. At last, she thinks, this will be her perfect victory.

Oh god. Oh god, someone put effort into this. Light doesn't know whether to be flattered or horrified.

(Why can he hear this in his voice?)

The control room is silent but for the humming of thousands of monitors mounted on the walls, all displaying static now thanks to Kira's interference. "I know you're there, L," Kira says, taking one step forward. Then another. "You can't hide from me forever." "You're right," says a new voice. "I wasn't hiding in the first place." Kira turns towards it, gripping her scythe in one hand—

"My what," Light says aloud.

—and nearly gasps when she identifies the source: the large L painted on the back wall. Her mind whirls. Another recording, just like the one a million people had heard from the TV that day. L's hiding behind an image again. "Very funny," Kira says. She's blocked all the escape routes; the real L must be in this room somewhere. "Show yourself." "As you wish." And then the painted L peels off the wall. Kira jumps back despite herself. The scythe clatters to the ground. The L is just a few centimeters taller than her, a fact that Kira instinctively resents, and it's the same font as what Kira had seen on television: the smooth vertical curve, the jagged angle, the protrusions from the spine. Her heartbeat quickens. Kira, despite being a magical girl—

"I'm a what?!"

—is ultimately still human. This… thing is decidedly not.

"Why am I the human one," Light mutters. She — he hasn't quite gotten the hang of this 'archive' yet, but he's searching for ones where he has wings later.

"What are you?" Kira asks, trying to flatten the tremble in her voice. "I am L," says L. "And I'm a girl, just like you." "You're a letter," Kira says. "An alive letter." "I wasn't always this way," L says. Its — her? — voice is matter-of-fact. "But it was… easier." "Easier to what?" "Tell me, Kira," L says. "Do you ever feel… uncomfortable in your own skin? Do you ever feel like you were born to be something else, something greater, something beyond your original form? Do you ever feel like you died a very long time ago?" Kira swallows, and stays silent. "Well, it doesn't matter," L dismisses. "It's far too late for you to change." "It's too late for anyone to change," Kira corrects. "You've seen recidivism rates. Criminals are rotten all the way to the core."

"That's not right," Light mumbles. Kira isn't just trying to get rid of all evil people in society; Kira is trying to scare everyone into being better. Of course behavior can be changed, corrected. What's the point of a new world if people can't improve on themselves?

…Then again. Light can't help but agree, just a little. Some people are beyond help.

(They have to be. Otherwise, why would the Death Note have dropped into her life?)

(She's doing the world a favor, honestly.)

"And what about me?" "Huh?" "Am I," and L leans in further, the serif tail at the top of the letter almost brushing Kira's cheek, "rotten to the core?" "I…" In an attempt to tear her gaze away from L, Kira finds herself tracing the lines of the letter with her eyes: the mathematically perfect arcs of her back interrupted by those sharp spikes of decoration. She feels herself oddly compelled to touch them.

Light pointedly does not think about the real L's hair.

What is she doing? Kira shakes her head, snapping out of her reverie, and dives for the scythe. Her fingers wrap around it just as she crashes into L's two-dimensional feet and L folds like a blanket, covering her in unexpected warmth before Kira scrambles back to her feet. "Monster," she shouts, pointing the scythe decisively, "I see you thus and I name you L!"

Well. That explains the magical girl thing. In retrospect, it does make more aesthetic sense than the notebook.

The scythe sparks; a beam of light bursts from its tip and — Stops. Kira watches in horror as it fizzes into nothing. A low chuckle fills the room. Something hot surges in Kira's chest: fury. "A bit difficult to conduct your magic when I have no face, isn't it," L says. She's shifted to lounge languidly on the floor, rather than sprawled awkwardly across it. "That's not — fair! Just looking at you should be enough!" "The world isn't fair, my dear Kira," L says. "As I'm sure you know best." Kira's free hand clenches into a fist. There's nothing for it. She's going to have to strangle this letter-girl. She's going to have to stop her breath at its root. "Well, Kira? What are you going to—" Kira drops the scythe and pounces. L twists away too late; Kira is already on her, one foot hooked over the bottom stroke of the letter to prevent her from running, her hands straining towards the juncture between L’s serif and vertical curve. L is so very warm, almost searing under Kira’s fingers as they close around her throat. L groans. The heat in Kira’s chest abruptly changes directions to pool in her stomach. It occurs to her distantly that if L can’t be counted as having a face, it’s entirely possible that she doesn’t need to breathe, either. Kira can’t bring herself to care. Here L is, her worst enemy, completely under Kira’s thumb — the exhilaration leaves Kira’s throat dry. "What do you think of that, L?" She tightens her grip. L makes a choked sound; the two lines of the letter’s throat shudder beneath Kira’s fingers. "You like that?" "Please," L gasps, "I need—" "Use your words," Kira hisses. Curiosity drives her to slide a finger into the crack between the two lines that make up L’s vertical stroke, and to her vicious delight L whimpers. "Come on, L, what do you want?" "Keep doing that," L says. The cool voice from the public broadcast, rendered into shreds. Kira desperately wants her to shut up forever. She unconsciously shifts her weight against L’s bottom stroke, hungry for friction. "Oh god, Kira, I…" "Yeah?" Kira wedges a second finger in, and has to bite her lip to stifle a moan when L bucks against her. "I dreamed about this," L manages, low like a confession. "Dreamed about y

"Light, Sayu! Time for dinner!"

Light slams her laptop shut so quickly she thinks she sprains a finger.

"Coming!" She yells downstairs, wincing at how out of breath she sounds.

Jesus fucking Christ. What was that? Why did she keep reading?

And. And wait. She? No, he. Light’s a he, no matter what weird people on the internet think, the same way L isn’t actually a letter. Right. She must have just gotten confused.

…He must have just gotten confused. Obviously.

(Something in Light’s ribcage pangs.)

He wills the blood away from his cheeks. He shouldn’t be surprised, frankly. Light is perfectly aware there’s porn of everything on the internet, even if it is marked E for Everyone.

…Wait.

Light opens his laptop again, scrolls as fast as he can to the top, then hovers over the E.

Oh. Ohhhh. Well. How was he supposed to know, he sulks. There should be a huge banner proclaiming THERE’S SEX IN THIS FAN FICTION for ease of access to first-time users. The world is truly rotting.

"Light?"

"On my way!"

Light shuts his laptop again, more gently this time, and opens the door.

Do you ever feel like you died a long time ago?

It is far too easy to imagine L’s mouth moving around the words.

Light closes her eyes against it. What a ridiculous question.

She can hear Ryuk’s laughter the whole way down.

[ @deathnotetober day 9: crack ship ]

[stereopticons]

On This Day in Schitt's Creek: June 22

2019

101 [david/patrick, E, 8,883] by @spiders-hth-is-an-outlier

Still, it's true that Patrick can have his shy side. He likes to be a gentleman – Mr. Order Whatever You Want I'm Paying and Mr. Here Let Me Fix That For You and Mr. No David Not In the Backseat I Want It to Be Special – so David can't entirely rely on Patrick's willingness to charge forward for the greater good.

5 Times Patrick chickened out telling David how he felt… and the one time he didn’t [david/patrick, G, 1,034] by pulangaraw

What it says in the title.

A Rainy Day for Johnny and Moira [johnny/moira, G, 2,904] by @inxaxcrown

Johnny and Moira have a spat. Johnny tries to smooth things over with his wife.

For All That You Are [david/patrick, T, 1,698] by @pameluke

Patrick sees David differently.

i would give all this (and heaven too) [david/patrick, E, 18,313] by wardo_wedidit

"It sounds ridiculous to think when they’re literally on a spaceship, but David dresses like he’s from the future. It’s the first thing Patrick notices." Or, Patrick wins a ticket onto the first civilian voyage to populate New Earth, and he's determined to face his fears and change his life. The one thing he didn't plan on was David Rose.

Legends Only [alexis/mutt, T, 2,401] by Haemish

Connor the 16-year-old Gay Kid who doesn't WANT to fit in stans Lesbian Alexis-

now i found you (don’t know what to do) [david/patrick, T, 17,193] by @wild-aloof-rebel

Stevie has decided to rent out their sofa for the weekend, and David can't imagine a worse hell than three nights with a stranger sleeping right outside his door.

now you see me [david/patrick, T, 4,667] by @grapehyasynth

Stevie sets David up on a blind date.

Road Trips [david/patrick, NR, 2,055] by DefenderofRoses

David Rose spends many important moments of his life on road trips.David Rose learns to love and live on road trips.

Slowly I Turn, Or, Niagara Falls [david/patrick, E, 11,922] by @thecartwrite

Even though David has volunteered to spearhead the wedding planning and should be good at it, he has been utterly paralyzed when it's come to making any decisions. And now he has to spend the weekend with Patrick's parents visiting some tourist trap and he is not okay. Thank you to WhenWhereWhy for the prompt: 'David & Patrick go on a Brewer family vacation, preferably to somewhere that pre-Schitt’s Creek David would deem disgusting but Patrick just wanted to go on vacation with his family so David obliges and he actually has the best time.' This was really fun and thank you for suggesting it. I hope you like it!

2020

Come and Get It [david/patrick, T, 2,100] by upbeat

“So I’m beginning to think that Ray only listens to Prince,” David notes with a quick laugh. He takes the glass of wine from Patrick’s hand and their fingers brush each other’s lightly. “Do you have something against Prince?” Patrick asks, amused. ... David and Patrick meet the day before David is supposed to file his incorporation papers. Business and pleasure ensue. A quick little alternate first meeting loosely inspired by a particular scene in Season 2 of CW's Backpackers (starring Noah Reid). Edit: Now with a superb Part 2, Got it! by the amazing Poutini

For Want of a Goat [david/patrick, T, 7,862] by @msarahv

What if a goat had scared David and made him fall to his Doom? What if he got injured and had to be looked after in his Distress?Or - Patrick is a great boyfriend, what else is new?

love that for me [ted/alexis, T, 1,867] by orphan_account

None of her friends compare to David or Twyla, but she’s happy spending time with them, anyway, and a little glad that she can still honestly say that she hasn’t changed as much as her family might have thought she would when she first announced the move. New York feels like home and she has amazing friends and family. For right now, that’s more than enough.

Sleepover [david/patrick, E, 2,318] by @streetlampsunset

David ends up sleeping over at Patrick's after all.

Stay In My Corner [david/patrick, T, 24,416] by @maxbegone

Patrick’s not just a guy who materialized out of nowhere. He has a history. He has family and friends here in this town where he was raised, and there is so much more for David to learn about this man that he loves to the ends of the earth. -- David and Patrick venture to Patrick's hometown shortly after their engagement, where David learns so much more about the people and the places that shaped the man he's going to marry.

You Have My Heart So Don’t Hurt Me [david/patrick, G, 6,861] by Point_of_no_return

"Okay," Patrick said as he took a sip of coffee. "This is not working anymore. I think it's time we look for an apartment." Blinking, taking in that last phrase, David sat stunned. "Oh. Okay, I mean if that's what you want-" "Well I think it's more of a need at this point, David. Been thinking about it for a while." "Oh..."Oh. Patrick and David were abruptly disturbed that morning from Patrick's roommate, Ray Butani, who walked in on them while in bed. Patrick blurted out his intentions to look for someplace with more privacy. In this canon-divergent fix-it, some real communication takes place between our beloved characters. Plus other milestones. There's just a lot of sweet, fluffy goodness.

2021

It's Time [david/patrick, E, 21,842] by @lisamc-21

David and Patrick have been pen pals and best friends for sixteen years, but haven't met yet. A series of missed connections, crises and excuses have kept them apart. Until now. David decides not seeing Patrick and admitting his feelings is a bigger risk than living his life in friendship limbo. So, he decides to surprise Patrick by flying in for his MBA graduation. This fic is written in dual POV. The entire fic is rated T (for cussing) except for the very last scene (rated E). So I set the work to E rating, but if you're not interested in reading explicit fic, you'd get a full story if you read through the first half of the last chapter.

2022

I'll Kiss You in the Morning [david/patrick, M, 2,732] by @brrose-apothecary

Patrick explains to David that "I Love You" means never having to say you're sorry for morning breath.

Mistakes We Knew We Were Making [david/patrick, T, 29,107] by @aoubooming

The first time David Rose met Patrick Brewer was on the playground when he was in first grade. This is the story of their friendship through the years, and of the many (many) mistakes that eventually lead to their happiness.

Resplendent In The Morning Light [david/patrick, M, 1,275] by @a-noble-dragon

David wakes slowly. He blinks his heavy eyelids then reluctantly peels them open, only to be instantly wide awake when confronted with the picture perfect image of his husband stood in front of the bedroom window. Patrick's back is towards him and his face is in profile, illuminated by the early morning sun.

Stacy and the Rich Kids [gen, G, 12,882] by @meadowharvest4856

The Baby-Sitters Club has a new client! Stacey McGill can hardly believe her luck when she gets a steady sitting job for Stoneybrook's newest temporary residents - the Rose family of Rose Video fame! She can't wait to meet the rich kids and thinks it'll be so much fun. But will little Alexis and David Rose make her change her mind?

You just wanna feel what can't be known [david/patrick, E, 1,459] by @sspaz1000

Patrick likes nipple play. David gives it to him. That's it. That's the fic.

2023

[Art] Patrick's Surprise [david/patrick, M, art] by @lizzie-bennetdarcy

What has Patrick been hiding underneath all those lil button-ups?

Live By Love Though The Stars Walk Backwards [patrick & stevie, T, 13,639] by @chelle-68

Stevie returns from a work trip to discover an exhausted Patrick who has trouble sleeping without David, who has been in LA visiting his family. Stevie's offer to spend the night to keep Patrick company, hoping it will help him sleep, turns into a night of heartfelt conversation about love, friendship, fate, and taking chances.

proportionate compensation [david/patrick, G, 240] by @enablelove

A cute little moment of David being nice.

2024

Pink, as the bing on your cherry [david/patrick, E, 896] by @mammameesh

After Rose Apothecary gets robbed, Patrick gets spanked to make things up to David.

Rose [david/patrick, T, 100] by @ramonaflow

Stats:

No fanworks for 2017 or 2018 2019: 10 fics/71,070 words 2020: 6 fics/45,424 words 2021: 1 fic/21,842 words 2022: 5 fics/47,455 words 2023: 3 fanworks (2 fics, 1 fanart)/13,919 words 2024: 2 fics/996 words Total: 27 fanworks (26 fics, 1 fanart)/200,706 words