#it is also true that Sid does the vast majority of cooking in his parents' house and they are going to suffer without him lmao

[void-botanist]

Incorrect Quotes: more AOM

I couldn't not take @ink-flavored's open tag for this.

Rules: Use this link to generate some incorrect quotes for your characters!

A proper intro to Sid's Ensaum friends Palmyra and Colin is coming soon but for now enjoy them in incorrect quotes:

Palmyra: How would you like your coffee? Sid: As dark and as bitter as my soul. Palmyra, shouting to someone behind the counter: I need one vanilla latte with extra cream and sugar!

Palmyra: Sid is restricted to decaf for the rest of this adventure.

Colin's mom: Here you go, Blondie, a nice hot cup of coffee! Colin: It's cold. Colin's mom: A nice cup of coffee. Colin: It's horrible! Colin's mom: Cup of coffee. Colin: I'm not sure if this even IS coffee. Colin's mom: C U P.

Colin: We can't lose. Because we have this. [points to their chest] Palmyra: We have heart? Colin: Heart? No, me. I'm pointing at myself. I'm going to win this for us.

Colin: Surgery is basically just stabbing someone to life. Sid: Please never become a surgeon.

Colin: [is wearing silk pants] How does this look? Sid: Like it slips on and off really easily. Colin: Sid: No, I didn't mean it like that- Palmyra: We know what you meant.

Sid: I'm having problems with a guy… Avis: Like his dead body won't fit into your trunk kind of problems, or you like him kind of problems?

Sid: Mom, remember when you said you weren’t going to interfere with my love life? Emma: No, that doesn’t sound like me at all.

Emma: I love cooking breakfast. It makes the whole house smell like bacon. Sid: That’s true, but it also smells like fire and panic. Emma: You and the smoke detector need to get off my case.

Emma: BWWAAAAAAAAAA! Oh, you hear that? That's the wrong opinion alarm. Donovan: That is not something you actually have installed. Emma: Sorry, say again? I couldn't hear you over my alarm that YOU SET OFF with your WRONG-ASS OPINION.

Avis, to Sid: How do you tell someone politely you want to hit them with a brick?

Bonus:

Leon, to Avis: You drink too much, swear too much, and your morals are highly questionable. Avis: … Leon: You are everything I’ve ever wanted in a best friend.

I'll tag @kudzucataclysm, @writernopal, and @outpost51 plus anyone else who wants to join in!