#it is Always the right time for tamino

[scuderiaspringsteen]

eons ago @nolansiegels tagged me to answer these questions and i've finally gotten around to it!!

tagging @gayferrari @catboyseb @rosberggp @97leclrc @kissingwalls @darlingnemesis @raikkonenslay and anyone else who wants to do it

do you make your bed? yes but very poorly. hate the idea of dust on my sheets however i simply don't enjoy making the bed

favorite number? hmmmm i like 9 very much. nice little triangles ect

what's your job? i'm a uni student double majoring in linguistics and anthropology with a minor in arabic and i'm an archival intern

if you could go back to school, would you? i'd go back to elementary school in a heartbeat. also i fear i enjoy uni too much and will try and stick around for some time.....

can you parallel park? as of literally one week ago i've magically been able to reliable parallel park. idk how or why but i'm not complaining

do you think aliens are real? welll maybe there's Something out there but probably we'll never meet which is for the best

can you drive a manual car? no but i do want to learn (that being said i pretty much hate driving in general and will continue to avoid it whenever possible)

guilty pleasure? british white boy rock music (think catfish and the bottlemen circa waves sam fender the wombats ect) and this very particular green tea mochi danish from a bakery near me

tattoos? none rn, although i follow a ton of tattoo artist and have a couple from whom i definitely want to get something. unfortunately i can't make up my mind and stick with it for longer than 5 seconds so !! tattoo plans on indefinite hold

favorite color? dark greens.....olive emerald forest ect. however i weirdly tend to both accumulate items and clothes in various shades of blue so like. people irl tend to associate me with that apparently

favorite type of music? uhhhhhhhhh. it oscillates wildly but artists i can p much always listen to are jeff buckley tamino springsteen z berg u know the sort. also mika. (i was gonna put him as my guilty pleasure unfortunately i do not feel guilty in the least. everyone go listen to coke studio stardust)

do you like puzzles? yesss always !!! physical puzzles are very dear to me bc my family is insane abt them in a good way but i also love puzzle games!

favorite childhood sport? figure skating <3 og dramatic bitch sport that i have been following religiously since early childhood

do you talk to yourself? mmm sometimes i narrate in m head but rarely out loud

tea or coffee? so. tea forever and always HOWEVER this is largeley bc american coffee is kinda ass and i'm reminded of this whenever i leave the country. bought some fun coffee stuff in italy which i'm very excited to use !!

first thing you wanted to be when growing up? a librarian and then a tech/business girlie (dark time in my life) and then a stage manager. kind of come full circle now !!

what movies do you adore? taking a minute to say tal u have incredible taste thoroughbreds 2017 is so near and dear to me. also and then we danced !!! i remember watching that in the shittiest quality with a russian dub over the georgian with english subs....excellent film also got me very into georgian food. and man from u.n.c.l.e is the only action film ever. okay actually gonna answer now here are some of the all time favorites (i warn u these are not all Good they're just Good To Me): the decoy bride, amelie, roman holiday, the blue caftan, the social network (sorry), matthias et maxime, jab we met, yeh jawani hai deewani, ek main aur ekk tu (2000's bollwood is sooo important to me)

[hiddenbeks]

tagged by @southernreaches thank you fray!!! 🫶

rules: put your music library on shuffle, then list the first five songs that come up in a poll to let people vote for their favorite!

tagging (if you wanna do this, no pressure!!)

@yahgrondu @yharnams @pawnguild @volkihar @nokstella

@gurathins @alexheart @pinkfey @gortash @merdruid

@qingyii @ehlnofaey @tarasahl @katsigian @vilnan

[bright-side20]

A little Elriel scene inspired by the song Sunflower by Tamino and Angèle 🥰

set pre-acosf, probably during acofas

Azriel had heard the soft hum of her voice before he fully emerged from the house. His steps were slow as he made his way down the path. He had heard it before ,when she thought no one was listening, when she hummed to herself in the kitchen, when she stood by the window at night, gazing out at the Sidra like she was waiting for something...

Elain didn’t seem to notice him. She was completely absorbed in her task, hands moving through the soil.

"You sing to your plants," Azriel said before he could think.

Elain didn’t startle. Didn’t jolt like most did when he spoke from the dark. She only smiled, pressing her fingers into the soil. “Of course I do,” she said simply. “They listen.”

He stayed where he was, just watching her. The golden brown of her hair was pinned up in a loose bun, little strands curling at the nape of her neck. She wore a simple, pink dress, its hem dusted with soil, the sleeves rolled to her elbows, exposing the pale skin beneath, smudged faintly with dirt. The fabric shifted lightly with the breeze, clinging to her soft curves as she moved...

She glanced up at him at last, her cheeks flushed , a smudge of earth streaked high on her cheekbone. A question in her big brown eyes.

"You came out just to watch me garden?"

Azriel huffed a quiet laugh, but the truth curled inside him, heavier than it should have been. He was watching her. Had been, even from the window earlier, half listening to his brothers, unable to keep his eyes from finding her.

"You’re preparing the garden for winter?" he asked instead, watching as she worked.

Elain nodded, glancing toward the sky where the last of the sunlight shone through the clouds. "The ground will freeze soon."

Azriel’s gaze swept over the fading blooms, the once vibrant greenery now tinged with the first signs of decay. "Doesn’t it make you sad?" he asked. "To watch everything wither?"

She lifted her head, her gaze meeting his. "No," she said, brushing dirt from her hands. "They’re not dying. They’re just resting."

She gestured to the garden around her. "Some plants need to be cut back so they can grow stronger in the spring. Others, I cover with mulch to protect their roots from the frost. And for the more delicate ones, I gather their seeds so I can plant them again when the time is right."

Her lips curled slightly. "Everything in the garden knows when to retreat, when to conserve its strength. Winter isn’t an end ,it’s a slumber. And when it’s over, they’ll bloom even better than before."

Azriel exhaled slowly. "You tend to this garden like it’s something precious. Like it’s worth waiting for, worth enduring the cold for."

His voice was quieter when he added, "Maybe that’s what makes it bloom."

Azriel knelt beside her, watching as she carefully tucked a cluster of lavender into place. His gaze drifted to her hands ,her nails chipped, faint scars lining her palms, tiny nicks from tending the garden. Proof that beauty was the result of her hard work. That it had been earned.

She noticed his stare but said nothing. Instead, she sighed, brushing loose strands of hair from her face, streaking more earth across her cheek.

Azriel’s attention flicked to the last sunflower standing tall amidst the fading remnants of her garden. Its golden face was turned stubbornly toward the last slanting rays of sunlight, refusing to bow to the coming frost.

"That one’s persistent," he noted, amusement in his voice.

Elain smiled. "It is." She reached out, running her fingers lightly over its thick stalk. "Sunflowers always turn to face the sun, even when the light is insufficient . Even when the seasons change."

"And what happens when the sun is gone?" he asked quietly.

She glanced at him, her brown eyes soft. "They remember where the light last was," she said. "And when the days grow longer again, they’ll turn back to it stronger than before."

Azriel swallowed, her words settling deep inside him. He looked at her at the quiet resolve in her, at the way the light clung to her skin like it belonged to her.

"You’re like that," he said before he could stop himself.

Elain blinked, tilting her head slightly. "Like what?"

He nodded toward the sunflower. "Like them. Stubborn. Unyielding. Full of hope."

A soft laugh escaped her. "And what does that make you?"

He didn’t answer right away. Just watched as a breeze stirred the petals of the sunflower, its golden head swaying but never bending.

Then, finally, he murmured, "Not the sun."

He reached out, brushing the trace of soil from her cheek with his scarred fingers. "But maybe the one who shields it. The one who makes sure it stands through the storm."

Elain’s breath caught. His touch lingered, longer than it should have. Long enough for his thumb to skim across the curve of her cheekbone, for his fingers to hesitate before pulling away.

But she didn’t flinch. Didn’t shy away.

She never pulled back from his touch.

Instead, she tilted her head toward the sunflower again, as if that would ease whatever passed between them. "You think it needs protecting?" she asked softly.

Azriel swallowed, his throat tight. "Everything does." His voice softened "Even the things that seem strong."

She was quiet for a long moment, her gaze sweeping over the garden, over the rows of plants settling into their winter slumber, trusting that despite the cold, warmth would return.

"I don’t think it only needs protecting," she murmured. And when she looked at him again, her eyes were bright. "I think it just needs someone who understands."

His stomach twisted.

Because he did understand.

There had been so many times he had thought the same of her. That despite her softness, despite her gentleness, she did not need to always be shielded.

She only needed someone who saw her.

And Mother above, he saw her.

But she wasn’t his to see.

Azriel exhaled sharply, tucking his hands behind his back. He shouldn’t be here. Shouldn’t want to stay, despite all of it. Shouldn’t be watching the way the wind played with the loose tendrils of her hair, shouldn’t be memorizing the way the sunlight softened against her skin, the way her lips parted slightly as she studied his face.

"Do you have work today?" she asked suddenly, her voice careful.

Azriel hesitated, then shook his head. "No."

A small, tentative smile touched her lips. "Then will you have tea with me?" She glanced at his wings. "It’s probably the last sunny day ,you could sunbathe one last time."

His breath stilled.

It was such a simple thing. Just tea in the garden, nothing more.

But the fact that she had asked, the fact that she wanted him to stay…

He nodded.

Her smile grew, and she stood up, wiping her hands on her apron before turning toward the house. "I’ll just go change. I’ll be back in a moment."

He watched her leave, his heartbeat unsteady.

And as soon as she was gone, his gaze flickered back to the sunflower.

It had turned again. Not toward the sun. But toward the space where Elain had stood, just like he did.

Azriel clenched his jaw, still kneeling, his wings shifting as the realization hit him.

He had been wrong.

She was the sun.

And he was the one who had been starving for her light, her warmth, all along.

[bryonyashleysworld]

Hi, helloooo!

I don't think I've ever made a post here buuut I thought now is a great time! I've written a small self insert inspired by @queenofsovngarde fanfiction "Carefully Orchestrated Plans (no strings attached)" on Ao3 and I wanted to share it with you guys🩷

Enjoy!

-------

Ash: Mingjue will act as my family and by extension Jin Guanyao and Xichen too apparently

Jiang Cheng: Wait what

Mo Xuanyu: What's going on?

Wei Wuxian: Yeah what?

Nie Huaisang: Could you elaborate on that dear?

Ash: Okay so, remember how we said that we're doing family dinner? Well, Jiang Chengs parents graciously invited us but anyway, Mingjue and I met up today after he learned that I'm the girl from theater with Huaisang and we caught up on what's going on in our lives and all that jazz. Well, when it was my turn I had like a whole breakdown about my life, cried, it was nothing and then we talked about our latest shenanigans aaaaaand he decided to host the dinner and judge™ you guys and decide if you can (fake) marry me or not since he was always like a big bro to me until we lost contact and since my family situation is kinda wack anyway, this is great!

Wei Wuxian: ?????? BIG BRO MINGJUE???

Jiang Cheng: What the fuck

Mo Xuanyu: get wrecked guys

Lou Qingyang: I just got here but this is hilarious

Jiang Cheng: I didn't even plan this dinner okay? They decided to!

Wei Wuxian: Oh you're in trouble now brother

Ash: You know you can always just back out, right?

Jiang Cheng: :/

Nie Huaisang: Okay, she's speaking the truth.

Ash: What, you thought I was lying?

Nie Huaisang: Not about the dinner, I'm coming over now

Ash: Hey you really don't have to, oh there he goes....

Mo Xuanyu: Are we meeting up now?

Ash: Scratch that apparently because I'm already getting company?

-----------

(in privat chat between Jiang Cheng and Nie Huaisang)

Nie Huaisang: Are you at home?

Jiang Cheng: No?

Nie Huaisang: Well then get over here too

Jiang Cheng: The fuck, no

Nie Huaisang: So you're saying you don't care about Ash, proving to my brother that we are *not* serious about the (fake) marriage and I can't have that.

Jiang Cheng: Ugh, fine.

Nie Huaisang: Hurry

--------

Mo Xuanyu: Yeah well, text me if you still need me then

Ash: I will, thank you love <3

Wei Wuxian: I'm so confused????

Ash: Dw, the (fake) wedding is doing great and that's what's important

Lou Qingyang: Oh sure, the most important

Mo Xuanyu: Clearly, nothing is more important! How's the planning going btw?

Wei Wuxian: It's going great!!!

Wei Wuxian: Huaisang isn't being a huge help and A-Chang told me to fuck off but Ashley has been helping me immensely!!! We have a Pinterest board and everything

Ash: Oh yeah, we're really thriving

Lou Qingyang: Yesterday we looked at some wedding dresses with Wen Qing and Yanli, made a girls night out of it

Wei Wuxian: DDDD:

Wei Wuxian: @NieHuaisang @JiangCheng @WenNing GUYS NIGHT ON FRIDAY!!!!!

Wen Ning: Uh..? If I'm not busy

Wei Wuxian: you are now!!!

---------------

I sit in my room. On my bed are chocolates, already halfway eaten and in the background you can hear the quiet singing of Tamino playing soothing my silent cries. Today has been a lot on me and I just want the day to end so I can start fresh once more.

Through the screams of my thoughts I hear the front door opening and closing. Someone must've come home. Hushed voices make their way closer to my room and when I hear the knock I slowly look up with a tear stained face and slightly flushed from the warmth of my room.

"Ash...Ashley? It's Huaisang and A-Cheng. Can we come in? Please?" the quiet voice of Nie Huaisang speaks. Before I can utter a word, the door is being pushed open and I see them both standing in the door frame, their eyes in search of me. When they spot me sitting on the bed, Huaisang lets out a sigh and makes his way over to me, Jiang Cheng following closely but with a slight hesitance.

They find their places next to me. Finally, the words make their way to my mouth and I say "What are you two doing here? I didn't expect any visitors". I try to rub over my face as sneakily as possible while avoiding their gaze. Huaisang slowly puts an arm around me, pulling me into his arms gently. "We came because a birdy told me that you're not feeling well and how could we just let you be miserable by yourself?".

I put my head down, ashamed for them to find me in this vulnerable state. They haven't seen what a mess I can become nor did I want them to see it. " So he told you....I'm sorry, it's nothing you have to worry about" I speak quietly, my voice hoarse from all the crying I've done today. Jiang Cheng awkwardly puts a hand on my thigh and pats it softly, like a reminder that he's also there.

Huaisang smiles softly and shakes his head "No, brother didn't tell me anything I didn't already know. He just said that you looked like you would need company after you told us what has happened today. If he's your big brother, I want to be there for you too. And Jiang Cheng too, even if he is a grumpy cat." The latter grunts at Huaisang's teasing and shakes his head disapprovingly.

"I just didn't want you to be sad all by yourself. It's not right." he tells me firmly and once again, I find myself with tears in my eyes as I slowly lift up my head. "A-Chang, you-" I begin but he interrupts me "Don't make fun of me".

I choke out a small laugh and the tears start to fall without any control. "N-no I...thank you. Thank you both. This means...s-so much to me I-.."

Nie Huaisang presses me closer to himself. A warm body touches mine and suddenly I'm holding Jiang Chengs hand, all while my tears continue to fall down. I look up and into his face. A slight blush appears on his skin and he looks away, embarrassed by the affection showed so openly. "Yeah yeah, whatever.."he mumbles quietly, interlacing our fingers in the process. Despite the tears I smile. The thought that these two came here just because they were worried about me fills my heart with joy and a feeling I can't quite place while my cries continue.

After some time I calm down and clean my nose with a tissue Nie Huaisang hands me. "You guys are so cute..truly, thank you for coming here." I lean into Nie Huaisang and squeeze Jiang Chengs hand once more. "You know you can always count on us.." A-Cheng reminds me and I smile softly. Before I can reply, a sudden wave of tiredness sweeps over me and a big yawn escapes my mouth. Today's rollercoaster ride seems to finally be coming to an end. Huaisang gently pats my back and says " It's probably time to go to sleep huh? What do you say, we stay here tonight so we can make sure you get a good night's rest, hm? "

Stay? I blink my eyes in confusion and look at him: "Do you mean that?". He smiles and nods "Of course, right A-Cheng? Surely you have no problem with that" Jiang Cheng gives a small nod, his eyes softening as he squeezes my hand gently. "Yeah, I don't mind. We can keep you company."

Relief washes over me, knowing I won't be alone tonight. It's times like these where I always wished for someone to keep me company and I'm beyond happy that they are offering it to me. I manage a small, grateful smile. "Thank you. Really, it means a lot."

Huaisang pulls away slightly, just enough to reach for the box of chocolates. "Well, since we're staying, how about we finish these chocolates and then get ready for bed?"

Jiang Cheng raises an eyebrow but doesn't object as Huaisang pops a chocolate into his mouth. I let out a small laugh, the tension easing from my shoulders. "Alright," I say, my voice steadier. "But I get the last one."

Huaisang grins, nodding. "Deal."

The three of us share the remaining chocolates, the quiet sounds from us eating and the music in the background a welcome distraction. As we finish, Huaisang stands up and stretches. "I'll grab some extra blankets and pillows. A-Cheng, can you help set up?"

Jiang Cheng nods, releasing my hand reluctantly. "Yeah, sure."

I watch them move around the room, setting up a makeshift bed on the floor with extra blankets and pillows. Their presence is comforting, their quiet camaraderie a balm to my frayed nerves. When everything is ready, Huaisang turns to me with a gentle smile and reaches out his hand. "Alright, Ashley. Time to get some rest."

I nod, feeling the day's exhaustion catching up to me. I take his hand and move down to the floor where I quickly crawl under the covers, feeling a sense of safety I desperately needed. Jiang Cheng and Huaisang settle on either side of me, creating a protective barrier that solidifies this feeling of security.

"Goodnight," I whisper, my eyes already closing from how tired they are from crying.

"Goodnight," they both reply softly.

For the first time in a while I sleep through the whole night without even waking up once. As I slowly wake up the next morning, I notice some strong arms holding me tightly. It seems that during the night, both Huaisang and A-Cheng started to cuddle me in their sleep. A bright red plush appears on my face but I can't help but smile gently at this situation. I feel warm and secure between them.

As I drift off to sleep once again, I can't help but think of how lucky I am that I have such amazing people in my life, who are willing to drop everything and come to me, just to make sure that I am alright and will remain fine for the reminder of the day.

-----

If you've read this far, thank you so much and I hope you have a great day! Take a cookie on your way out (^o^)>🍪

[areyoudreaminof]

Moon on a String: A Lucien Vanserra Playlist

Here it is! A playlist for our sly fox, courtier, and emissary. Apart from being one of the most interesting characters in ACOTAR, Lucien is one of the most emotionally well rounded ones. I wanted to explore his wit and charm, as well as his own grief and sorrow. As always, meet me behind the cut for a lyrical deep dive! Listen Along Here!

Son My Son-Milo Greene

Son, my son The weight is unique One by one The words are complete Your testing is calling And we are still falling For keeps

Your waltz like repeating Continues your dreaming In threes You will bury that hatchet with an olive branch Tied to your knee

Habibi-Tamino

And as the full star tries his best to make the white pearl shine Glances of a new day have arrived And though he’s not alone, he fears to never love another And leave his heart forever with her smile

Something died within a soul Left the eyes to rust And every time it is recalled It covers all in dust

Bad Bad News-Leon Bridges

Ain’t got no riches, ain’t got no money that runs long But I got a heart that’s strong and a love that’s tall Ain’t got no name, ain’t got no fancy education But I can see right through, a powdered face on a painted fool

They tell me I was born to lose But I made a good good thing out of bad bad news

Young Man in America-Anais Mitchell

Like the wind I make my moan, I howl in the canyon There's a hollow in my bones, makin' me cry and carry on Make the foam fly from my tongue, make me want what I want Another wayward son waitin' on oblivion Waitin' on the kingdom come to meet me in my sin Waitin' to be born again, mother, kiss me cheek and chin Mmm, a little medicine, mmm, and I shed my skin Mmm, and lemme climb back in the bed you made me in

Old Friend-Sea Wolf

But now we're getting older and we're growing up So now less action in the water and we know enough Stood up on the rooftop on a night so clear That the lights from the city just disappeared

I know you don't believe me When I believe in you I know it could get much easier If you want it to

Late Night-Foals

Now I'm the last cowboy in this town Empty veins and my plastic broken crown They said I swam the seas then ran aground They said I once was lost but now I'm truly found And I know the place but not the way I feel, I feel no shame Oh now, Mama, do you hear my fear? It's coming after me

Beggin' for Thread-BANKS

So I got edges that scratch And sometimes, I don't got a filter But I'm so tired of eating All of my misspoken words I know my disposition gets confusing My disproportionate reactions fuse with my eager state That’s why you wanna come out and play with me, yeah

Turn Away-Beck

Turn Turn away From the weight of your own words It's a measure For the devil And betrays the lack of change Once you have spoken Turn away

Sun-Cat Power

Here it comes, here it comes, in all is burning Here it comes, here it comes, it’s splitting the bone Here it comes, here it comes, we’re all so tired of waiting Whose side, whose side are you on

I wanna hear every answer to every question It’s not that I never wanted, I just never knew If you can, if you could lend your hand This is the day people like we’ve been waiting for

Gold-Chet Faker

I might as well be in a garden I said, uh, a smell in the air is a dripping rose (You can be the one for me) Another soul to be my void then Of anything there that's made of gold

Call Me in the Afternoon-Half Moon Run

Take one if you need it but you really shouldn't be out this late Really wanna make you feel home Take one if you need it but you really shouldn't get this fucked up Really wanna get it to you Slide another shot by and wipe your dirty hands on me Swallow till you go blind and find a little company

Autumn Tree-Milo Greene

A man that resembles me Watching his young lady sleep Now I'm off to dream Comfort me

Is this my old shame? My mind is away How long have you been gone? The cold winter aged the soft of your face And I can't move on

River-Ibeyi

Carry away my dead leaves Let me baptize my soul with the help of your waters Sink my pains and complains Let the river take them, river drown them My ego and my blame Let me baptize my soul with the help of your waters Those old mes, so ashamed Let the river take them, river drown them

You Wanna Freak Out-My Morning Jacket

Play it smart, soul intact How you react is what you get back 'Cause that's the way we really see I am "you're" and "you're" is me Come on, you know how we are First we're up, up, down, down One day we're in, the next one we're out You wanna freak out? Come on

Don't Carry It All-The Decemberists

And there a wreath of trillium and ivy Laid upon the body of a boy Lazy will the loam come from its hiding Return this quiet searcher to the soil

So raise a glass to turnings of the season And watch it as it arcs towards the sun And you must bear your neighbor's burden within reason And your labors will be borne when all is done

No One's Here to Sleep-Naughty Boy/Bastille

You were always faster than me I'll never catch up with you, with you Oh I can feel them coming for me And you were always faster than me I'll never catch up with you, with you Oh I can feel them coming for me

Here's the pride before the fall Oh, your eyes, they show it all I can see it coming I can see it coming As I rise up through each floor Shit gets dark and you lose it all I can hear it coming I can hear the drumming

taglist: @cursebrkr, @octobers-veryown, @melting-houses-of-gold, @velidewrites, @reverie-tales, @thesistersarcheron @ultadverb, @c-e-d-dreamer, @andrigyn, @foundress0fnothing, @vulpes-fennec ,@asnowfern,@mossytrashcan, @thelovelymadone, @the-lonelybarricade, @shadowriel, @separatist-apologist , @fieldofdaisiies, @stickyelectrons, @vanserrass, @panicatthenightcourt, @krem-does-stuff, @iftheshoef1tz, @damedechance, @ablogofbipanic

Up Next: Rhysand. Happy Weekend!

[luvandmimo]

songs that reminds me of her

chet baker - you are mine, you!

''heart to heart, lips to lips; we're chained and bound together.''

2. jannabi - she

''she's everything to me'' <3

3. november ultra - soft & tender

''i feel better, better when we're together.''

4. frank sinatra - moon river

''we're after the same rainbow's end''

5. guns and roses - this i love

''i've searched the universe and found myself within her eyes.''

6. ritchie valens - we belong together

''you're mine and we belong together.''

7. the beatles - hey jude

''don't carry the world upon your shoulders.''

8. tamino, angele - sunflower

''so ready to lose everything, everything for your love.''

9. tamino - every pore

''and ill kiss every pore, if i could always have you around''

10. radiohead - you

''you are the sun and moon and stars are you''

11. the goo goo dolls - iris

''you're the closest to heaven that i'll ever be''

12. the black skirts - everything

''when I'm looking into your eyes, everything becomes ours''

13. the black skirts - ariel

''baby, you’ve got a strange gravitational force that pulls me towards you''

14. the smiths - there is a light that never goes out

''i love the smiths''

15. cigarettes after sex - you're all i want

''there is no other love, its only yours''

16. the police - every breath you take

''i dream at night, i can only see your face.''

17. chet baker - its always you

''funny, each time i fall in love, its always you.''

18. chet baker - tenderly

''you took my lips, you took my love so tenderly.''

19. frank sinatra - strangers in the night

''it turned out so right, for strangers in the night.''

20. gemini - know me

''this love will never change''

but my favorite song to listen is your voice<3

[not-sewell]

@ava-du-mortain, my beloved, tagged me to post 10 songs i've been into. so here goes:

songs i've been vibing to this month, in no particular order

1. All Things End by Hozier

the heavenly chorus. that's it. that's all.

2. Sunflower by Tamino, Angèle

this song, the music video everything makes me feel downright unwell.

3. Left Right by Abdullah Siddiqui, Ali Sethi, Maanu & Shae Gill

i'm just such a hoe for Ali Sethi and Shae Gill's pair and i'm eternally grateful to @zeesqueere, my dear friend, for sending me this.

4. Hum Aapki Aankhon Mein by S. D. Burman (performed by Geeta Dutt & Mohammad Rafi)

it's a very Mona x Nate song and i'm stuck with a Mona x Nate fic idk what else is left to say

5. Adiye by A. R. Rahman (performed by Sid Sriram)

well. i have one A. R. Rahman song zooming through my brain at any given time.

6. Khabar-e-Tahayyur-e-Ishq by Ali Sethi

Ali Sethi + Ghazal (specifically, ones with the themes of mysticism) has my body, mind and soul, friends.

7. Ay Hairathe by A. R. Rahman (performed by Hariharan, Alka Yagnik, Mohammed Aslam & A. R. Rahman)

OKAY SO I LIED. i always have multiple A. R. Rahman songs zooming through my brain at any given time.

8. Unnai Kaanadhu Naan (Live) by Berklee Indian Ensemble

this version of the Vishwaroopam song fucks severely. that's all.

9. What Colour Is Your Raindrop by Tajdar Junaid

this has exactly my kind of sentimentality to it, so... 🤷

10. Hoyto Tomari Janya by Sudhin Dasgupta (performed by Manna Dey)

again, this is has got a very Mona x Nate vibe, and i'm stuck with a Mona x Nate fic. :))

tagging (and pls ignore if you've done this already skfjks): @zeesqueere, @brightpinkpeppercorn, @bengalifairy, @serenpedac, @amlovelies, @ottobooty

[foxymoxynoona]

So, i have been reading Lowlander again (for maybe the 5th time 😭). I just love everything about it, you are such a wonderful writer you have the ability to make the reader feel as if they are in the story. I dont particularly mean that i relate to a character but it's as if i can see and smell and feel exactly what they can, it sounds simple but it really takes a lot of talent to do that ,so thank you.

Also, i always listen to music while reading and there is this song by Tamino called Persephone. Every time i hear it is as if i hear jk talking to m. Here are some of the lyrics:

"When you hid under my black wings They couldn't have protected you from anything Once in flight they would have let go You would have once again wound up below Only broken

Indeed, it's wrong to keep you near me One could call me cruel and deceiving"

So, yeah just wanted to tell you how much i love the story again, and your writing in general🌸🩷

Waaaah thank you so much! I am going to immediately go listen to this!

I love your clarification too about feeling in the world but not necessarily relating to the characters. I know most fanfic is written with the hope of readers projections themselves into the situation, but I really like capturing a specific character and letting them live and grow, even though that particular character won't feel like "me" to every reader.

I like to envision it as, sometimes you're reading a story and you're inside the main character (especially if it's first person or a reader insert), but other times I think of it as, my goal is to make if feel like you're invisible moving through the world right beside the characters. The story is alive around you, even if sometimes they are doing things you hate LOL and you are helpless to intervene

[werebutch]

Haiii teddy . . I know im sending this soo late. But how are you T_T I genuinely miss you so much I kind of hate being busy because I can't keep up with my spamming schedule... deadass... do u have anything planned here soon . . . Any updates playing games IDK ETC LOL. I care you and ur presence actually means a lot to me LOL. I went to a concert ^_^ tickets are cheap for some people btw I definitely recommend doing it, and getting on the train there (lol dm me for specifics) but I think you would enjoy just partyin:3 I would party wit you>:]

Hiii bex ^__^ u r so sweet I miss u too … it seems like u have been having fun though LOL I’m doing good, I’m sitting at my gate atm waiting to board.. very excited to see my bff.. it’s my first time flying by myself so I was pretty nervous (worst part for me is security) but now I’m ok :) now I just have to hope my bff is on time 😭. Other than that I’ve been okay, the bunnies are doing really well besides fawn’s liver infection which she’s on meds for. I’m having trouble with my family and my brain in general but that’s always so it’s ok nothing new LMAO. We don’t have much planned for this trip except hanging out and going to restaurants he wants to take me to so it’ll be nice :3

Your presence means a lot to me too.. seriously. My tumblr bff. That’s awesome who did you see? Earlier this year I went to see charly bliss and I think it was like $15.. very fun!! Pretty sure I went to Tamino for a similar price. Dude we should go to a show together sometime that would be so fun :) or really anything with u is fun LOL I’m always down.. I’m so glad you’ve been doing better (that’s how it seems I hope I’m right LOL) it’s really nice to see ^__^ happy for you!

How are u doing ?! What’s going on ?!

[whisperedhistory]

hey isabella!!

oof good luck with that !! yeah the end of the semester is no joke no matter which side of the teacher student equation you are lol

i'm also a matcha enjoyer, but tbh i mostly go for a cappucino or a mocha. tea wise, i mostly just stick to chai at home but living in the vicinity of 1453845 boba places means i've build up a standard order there too, jasmine green milk tea with grass jelly is my little treat every now and then.

aggressively competitive game night sounds like a dreammm (i am. a Very intense board games player) i have an endless letterboxd list of stuff i want to watch but this last month i've been overcome with the desire to marathon the disney cars franchise sooo i guess we're doing that? feeling very nostalgic tbh might watch debs and maybe the holiday to round it all out....

i mean this is the having meltdowns over tv website so you'd be well within ur rights haha but west wing and criminal minds nice! a couple of my friends are huuuge criminal minds fans and tbh i'm too much of a baby for crime stuff but i have been meaning to watch west wing for a while....re medical shows: i have a theory actually and it's that everyone has one medical procedural that's their cross to bear (mine is house md haha) but! i googled beautiful minds and it's based on oliver sacks books?! i loved reading those so i will have to watch this for sure. i'm currently watching m*a*s*h and gearing up for a black sails rewatch come january which i'm vv excited for !

okay question for today! what's your favorite song or album at the moment? i've had the new tamino singles and the new doechii album on repeat :) hope u have a marvelous day <3

love,

t

hi t!

the final day of midterms has officially ended so my students are off to get some much needed rest and i’ll be grading exams from the comfort of my couch (which, in my opinion, is soo much better than having to grade in my classroom).

i’m not a huge coffee person but i do love a good mocha! i’m also in the general vicinity of 1453845 boba places - my go to is taro milk tea. it satisfies everything i want in a drink!! sweet? check. fun color? check. i’m very easy to please.

yeah, i come from a family of intense board game players and i… am no exception. honestly, sometimes my game nights feel like they belong in a sitcom. boards have been flipped, people have been injured while playing uno, the list goes on. do you have a favorite game to play? or one that makes you the Most Intense?

oooh yes nostalgia is absolutely the way to go for movie watching this time of year. the holiday is always a must watch for me in december so looks like we’ll both be doing that! i definitely recommend watching the west wing, it’s SUCH a good show.

your theory about medical shows is spot on… unfortunately, my cross to bear IS greys anatomy. but i will say that i was really skeptical about brilliant minds at first for exactly that reason (like, who really needs yet another medical procedural?) and it’s FAR exceeded every single (lack of) expectation i had.

i still haven’t watch black sails in its entirety! i watched the first episode way back when the show first came out and i’ve been meaning to get back into it ever since.

ooh those are both excellent artist to have on repeat. i’ve been cycling through joy oladokun, katie gavin, pom pom squad, and kendrick lamar’s new albums on repeat! genuinely haven’t listened to any other artists in a couple of months haha

i hope you’ve had a good week so far!!

love, isabella

[moeitsu]

Number 7 pls!!

Also, who is that in your profile? If ya don’t mind me asking.

My profile pic is of Tamino Amir. He’s a Belgian-Egyptian artist and makes beautiful music. I would recommend him to anyone. I saw him live in February with Mitski and literally cried the entire time. He’s also drop dead gorgeous the man literally looks like a god.

I’m rambling.

Number 7: what tattoos i have and their meaning.

I’m actually really happy you asked that one because I have so many tattoos and i love them ALL!

Okay, I have 12 tattoos. I’ll try to keep it short tho.

1. “Spirit Lead Me” on my bicep. This was my 1st tattoo I got for my 18th bday. It’s from Psalm 143. I’m not really a religious person anymore, but I still appreciate the message. The whole verse is “Teach me to do your will, for you are my God. Show me what you want me to do, and let your gentle spirit lead me in the right path.”

2. A small bouquet of flowers on my hip. This one doesn’t have much meaning. It was a last minute tattoo i got because my friend was getting one and the artist was really chill and was like “you want one too?” And i just said sure and let him pick the art. Looking back, i don’t know why i did that😂

3. A Luna moth on my shoulder. I’ve always considered myself more of a moth than a butterfly, if that makes any sense. I took a picture of a Luna moth was i was 16 and i was obsessed with them ever since. Fun fact: the day i got it tattooed i got a Snapchat memory that i took that moth photo 3 years ago on the same day. It was just meant to be.

4. The master sword from Legend of Zelda on my arm. This one is kinda self explanatory. I just fucking love the games. I played my first was i was 9 years old and it became my entire personality for the rest of my life.

5. A soot sprite on my ankle. This one also doesn’t really have a meaning. A friend of mine had finished her tattoo apprenticeship and was doing small pieces on people as practice. So i asked her to practice on me and she gave me a cute little soot sprite.

6. “Set your heart ablaze” on my rib cage. I got this after the demon slayer movie. It’s one of my favorite animes, and Rengoku was such an important character to me.

7. An evil eye with a tear drop under the back of my neck. I’ve always worn the evil eye since i was young. I don’t remember when i started or why, but I’ve always had a necklace or a keychain or earrings with it on. I liked the idea of it on my back bc in my mind it wards off any negativity that people might send me when my back is turned.

8. A cecropia moth on my other shoulder. Not so much meaning behind this one. My other shoulder felt naked and i wanted to add symmetry with another insect. I chose the cecropia moth bc I found one in the woods one time and I felt like some kind of woodland fairy. It was literally the size of my hand.

9. 333. It’s my Angel number. I see it everywhere, and at least once a day. I was also born on the 3rd day of the 9th month and 3 was always a prevalent number growing up. (I was on bus #3. My childhood apt was #3. Me and my sibs make 3, ect)

10. A maple seed. I got this tattoo for my current partner. We’ve been together 7 years and on our second date we walked a nature trail and we had talked about watching the notebook later and I made a comment about “how romantic would it be if we kissed in the rain”, it was not raining that day. So he picked up handfuls of maple seeds and threw them in the air. They rained around us and he kissed me under them. It’s probably one of my favorite memories.

11. Peter Rabbit hugging his momma. This tattoo was dedicated to my mom. My nursery as a baby was Peter Rabbit themed, and I still have a lot of the decorations still in my room 24 years later :’) I also love my mom a lot.

12. A heart locket with my childhood cat in the frame. Pretty self explanatory. It was dedicated in his memory. He was literally the best cat ever and i miss him everyday. He passed on my 19th bday.

Thank you so much for asking Anon!!! I really enjoyed diving into this :)

[bright-side20]

A little Elriel scene inspired by the song 'Each Time' by Tamino. And by the way, if you're still wondering what Azriel's voice might sound like, go listen to this man.

The meadow spread wide beneath the pale light of the stars, a world painted in silver and red. Dark crimson flowers blanketed the earth, their petals glistening with dew. The air hummed with stillness, broken only by the soft rustle of the breeze through the grass.

And there she was, stretched out among the blooms, as if she were a part of the earth itself, born from its sweetest dreams. Elain’s hair spilled over the flowers, her golden waves shimmering like liquid sunlight against the dark. Her dress, soft and flowing, perfectly tracing the curves of her body, the color of deep cobalt, seemed to drink in the faint starlight, its rich hue contrasting beautifully against the dark crimson blooms. She looked like a vision born of twilight, her eyes closed, her lips faintly curved in a smile so serene it made his chest ache.

Azriel stood a few paces away, his boots rooted to the ground as if moving closer would shatter the fragile perfection of this moment. He’d spent centuries yearning for peace, for stillness...but now, in her presence, he knew this was what he’d been searching for.

Her.

“Azriel.” Her voice broke through the quiet, soft. She opened her eyes, and he froze at the sound of his name on her lips...soft, intimate, as if she had reached deep inside him and touched something only she could awaken. “I didn’t mean to disturb you,” he said.

She smiled “You’re not.” She patted the space beside her, an invitation as natural as the way the flowers leaned toward her, as if she were the sun.

He hesitated only a moment before joining her, stretching out on the soft grass. The scent of the flowers rich mingled with hers, wrapping around him in a way that made it impossible to think of anything but her.

They layed there for a moment in silent peace and He hadn’t spoken, afraid to shatter the moment.

It suits her, he thought, this place, this stillness. It suits us.

Yet beneath that peace, something restless burned in his chest. It wasn’t enough to simply lie here beside her. He wanted to reach out, to touch her , to feel the warmth of her skin against his. He wanted to tell her that this...this stillness, this closeness...was his idea of eternity. That no court, no battle, no crown could ever compare to this. That he could spend a thousand years lying here, beside her, and still crave more.

Elain gazed up at the stars, her expression soft. But Azriel couldn’t look away from her. The starlight painted her skin with an ethereal glow, kissed the curve of her lips, and made her seem more like a dream.Her sweet combination of jasmine and honey had woven itself into his senses. He wanted to drown in it, to seal this beauty in his mind forever. Each time again, and again, he thought, desperate to savor this moment.

“It’s beautiful, almost surreal,” she murmured.

He inclined his head in agreement as he replied, “It is.” But he wasn’t talking about Rosehall or the stars. He couldn’t tear his gaze from her, couldn’t stop the tide of longing surging within him.“But nothing this perfect can last,” he continued, the words slipping out before he could stop them.

Elain tilted her head, studying him. “Maybe it doesn’t need to last forever,” she said. “Maybe it’s enough to feel it. Even for a moment.”

Her words sliced through his defenses. “It’s always worth it,” he responded.

Her gaze briefly drifted to his lips before meeting his eyes again, and he didn’t know why it thrilled him. “Do you ever wish you could stop time?” she asked.

"Every day," he responded, hating how easily she seemed to see through him.

Her hand moved then, her fingers brushing against his with a touch so light it sent a shiver through him. He barely dared to breathe as her small hand slid to fit perfectly against his scarred one.

“I think I’d stop it here. Right now. If I could,” she said.

“Elain,” he said, her name breaking from him like a prayer...desperate and raw.

She turned fully toward him, her hair spilling across her shoulder . “Yes?”

He stared at her, his heart pounding so loudly he was sure she could hear it. He wanted to tell her everything...that she was the light in his darkness. That he thought of her every waking moment. That he dreamed of her every night. That he would give anything...anything...to be the one she chose. That every moment without her felt like a lifetime lost.

But all he could manage was a broken, “You deserve more than this.”

Her brows knit together, confusion in her gaze. “More than what?”

“More than I can give you,” he said, his voice cracking on the words.

“You’re wrong,” she said softly.

He shook his head, his jaw tightening. “I’m not.”

She didn’t pull away. Instead, he felt her fingers tighten more around his. “Maybe you don’t see it,” she said, “but I do.”

Azriel’s breath hitched. He wanted to believe her. Gods, he wanted to believe her more than anything.

“Elain,” he murmured, her name once more a plea. “You shouldn’t say things like that.”

“Why not?” she asked, her voice calm yet insistent.

“Because I’ll believe you,” he confessed. “And that’s dangerous. I can’t...”

Azriel closed his eyes, unable to bear the weight of her gaze any longer. It was too much...the hope in her expression. He let out a shuddering breath, his head tilting back toward the stars.

But then, the air between them shifted.

It wasn’t just the soft sound of her moving closer, the gentle rustle of her dress brushing against the roses beneath them. It was the way her warmth seemed to bloom, creeping over him like the first rays of the sun at dawn. It was the kind of warmth that promised a new beginning, the kind that reminded him what it felt like to truly be alive.

He inhaled deeply in her scent...And then he felt it,the faintest brush of her breath against his lips.

He opened his eyes.

She was so close, her face just inches from his, her eyes searching his. Her breath mingled with his, warm and soft. His heart thundered in his chest, each beat screaming at him to move, to act, to close that impossible gap between them. But he couldn’t. He was overwhelmed by the reality of her, by the weight of his longing.

"Elain…" he whispered her name again, she kissed him, and he knew, in that moment, he was utterly undone.

It was soft at first, tentative, like the brush of a rose petal against his lips. But as she deepened the kiss, her hand pressing gently against his chest, feeling the erratic beat of his heart beneath her palm, Azriel kissed her back, pouring all of his desperate, hopeless longing into that moment. She opened for him, softly moaning as his tongue slid to meet hers, and it was the sweetest sound he'd ever heard. Her taste ,sweet like honey lingered on his lips, the most intoxicating flavor he'd ever known. His fingers found her waist, gripping it with a mixture of need and disbelief, as though anchoring himself to the reality of her. She was here, she was real, and even if only in this perfect circle, she was his.

For the first time, he felt alive.

But just as he began to surrender to the moment, the world around him started to fade. The roses danced like ghosts in the wind, the stars flickering and dimming, and the warmth of her touch slipping through his fingers .

“No,” he choked out, a deep, gnawing panic clawing at his chest.

And then, with a jolt, Azriel awoke. His breath was sharp and ragged, the weight of the dream still heavy on him. The cold darkness of his room swallowed him, and with it, the warmth of her vanished entirely.

"Elain," he murmured into the emptiness, and the ache of it...her absence...was enough to break him all over again.

But the memory of her lingered...etched into his soul, a cruel reminder of what he could never have. He felt a shadow stroking his bare shoulder as if consoling him.

His hand moved to his head, fingers threading through his hair as he tried to calm the storm inside him. He closed his eyes, tilting his head back, letting the motion soothe the tension in his neck. His gaze fell to the nightstand, where the headache powder and earplugs sat quietly, a reminder of her care. How much longer could he stay away from her? How much longer could he pretend that the cold distance between them wasn’t slowly tearing him apart?

[antinous]

galaxy, melody, perfume, pigment and valentine!

galaxy; what fascinates you? Stories of people who passed out or had some sort of trip where they feel like they're pulled out of their body, see the inner machinations of the universe without understanding it fully, see angels, then get slammed back into their body and just have to carry on with their life.

melody; favorite artists? Aurora, Hozier and Tamino always get me right in the heart... For more upbeat days I love some Dirt poor robins or GHOST DATA though!

perfume; favorite scent? Oh gosh I'm so bad at knowing the names of scents...I tend to gravitate towards florals though, generally prefer fresh scents over sweet/warm ones.

pigment; what color is your hair naturally? if you could dye it any color which one would you choose? My natural haircolor is blonde! I've dyed it several times in pastels or like, darker reds and browns...I actually prefer it the way it is now. Maybe I'd try a more lively shade of blonde though? It's gotten a bit 'sandy' over the years!

valentine; best gift you’ve ever received? This wasn't really meant as a gift, but a friend of mine once sent me a drawing she found in passing of this little smiling guy with a bright, glowing yellow sun for a face, and told me that is what I look like in her head. I have that image as my desktop background now, because it genuinely changed how I look at myself and helped me gain more confidence.

[bestedoesmeow]

...⌜didn't care for it all while you couldn't hold your tears⌟                                                 bradley ''rooster'' bradshaw

since I started college and got out of my comfort zone I've been having quite hard time adapting to my life and everything sooo I wanted write a comfort imagine with my comfort character and I hope you feel the same comfort as me...have a nice one bestie ;3

(Before starting I will not mention any age range you can think of it as you wish/like)

Top Gun men comforting you part 2//

named after : tamino's fascination

warnings:smooth kissing scene at the end and that's it.

It's raining after almost a month. The weather is hot and sticky with humidity and now wet with rain. You hear the sound of the falling drops from the open room window while sitting on your and Rooster's bed, your eyes staring blankly at the wall. You don't want to do anything; you don't want to have breakfast or watch something or go downstairs. You just want time and everything around you to stop. You don't want to think anymore. You don't want to feel worried about anything. You don't want to feel worried about making new friends or about what they think of you. It is Saturday when you decide to overthink those. Rooster's voice coming from downstairs helps you get out of that endless thought train.

"Y/N you want to grab breakfast?" His voice is deep and far, so you are not sure if he is able to hear you, but you still answer him anyway.

"I don't really feel like it, Bradley." You say, picking the sides of your nails unintentionally. You are still not sure if he can hear you, but when you hear approaching footsteps, you know he doesn't hear you at all. He opens the door, slowly sticking his head out from the space between the door and the door sill.

"You want to grab something to eat, honey?"

"I don't really feel like it Bradley.Why don't you grab something without me?" you say, looking at him with your tired eyes and eyelids.

"Is everything okay, baby?" He says this time.He closes the door behind him before placing himself on the edge of the bed. His eyes wander around your face worriedly. His hand slowly moves closer to yours to rub it.

"I am not sure what to say. I don't even want to talk." You say, before taking a deep breath and letting it out. You reach out to hug Rooster as he slowly moves toward you on the bed. You are held by your hair as he draws you against his chest. You put your head on his lap and take deep breaths while he caresses your body and hair with his consoling hands. He massages your back instead of talking while bending in close to kiss the area under your ear. After that, he speaks quietly.

"You want to lie down?" You nod your head as if to say yes before moving your side of the bed. Your body almost feels too weak to move. You faintly put your head on your pillow.

"You want me to go or not?"

"No, I don't want you to go. Actually, please stay. " You speak before taking his hand in yours. He gives you a weak smile and settles down on the bed beside you. He makes you turn around so he can be the big spoon before he begins to smooth-kiss every inch of your hair.

"You feeling any better now, sweetie?" He says before pulling you closer to his lap.

"Mhmm. " You manage to say it before feeling his mustache on your neck once again.

"Everything is going to be okay, you know right?" he says, almost sending shivers down your spine. With the sound of the summer rain and Rooster's heavy breaths, you feel more comfortable than ever. That gut feeling inside you is almost gone.

"And I'll always be your best friend. You don't ever need to feel alone.'' You are everything, baby. The world is a better place with you." With his last statement, you turn yourself around to face him. His eyes are half closed and he has a sleepy look with his almost messy hair. He places his hand on your hair and strokes it slowly while watching you. You move closer to give him a kiss. His eyes close as he pulls you closer to him to kiss you. Your hands wander around his hair throughout the kiss while his hands are placed on your waist. You move away to breathe while he is watching you with his mouth half open. "I am glad that you are my best friend, Bradley." You say before he pulls you into another kiss.

[cafeinthemoon]

Ruins - Chapter I

Chapter 1

Wordcount 2,8k

Title Part I

Fandom Shuumatsu no Valkyrie / Record of Ragnarok

Symbols ⭕➕💛

Warning (s): none

Tagging @darling-imobsessed (if you want to be tagged in any of my stories, just send an ask or a message 😉)

N. A.: So... I posted it lmao This chapter has already been posted on my ao3 and Quotev, and the next one will be out soon ;) I've just read snv's manga (haven't watched the anime yet) and enjoyed so much that it couldn't pass without a short story from me at least, so here we have a little romance with the King of Hellheim himself. hope you enjoy it 💜

"Indeed, it's wrong to keep you near me One could call me cruel and deceiving But in your sacred air I am full of light Your loving arms are the true delight To which I'm lost"

(Tamino, Persephone)

Instead of saying that you accepted to be there to pursuit a goal, you’d rather say you were after answers.

The tradition was well known by you: every year, a different region of your world was selected by Valhalla’s divine council for the task of sending a group of young, healthy women from every class, tribe and family available to the gods’ temporary residences where they would learn and serve, having their natural talents sharped to their limit, according their masters’ will. That time, your land was the chosen one, and your family selected you among your sisters.

It wasn’t the case that you longed for it. However, a girl couldn’t just oppose to the divine beings’ decision, and you knew you had no chance to find what you were seeking for in your own land, a small town by the sea where the commoner’s perspectives wouldn’t surpass the art of fishing in the case of the men and the ability of fixing nets in the case of the women, so that the best you could do was to bow your head and go with the others.

***

As far as you could see, there was nothing to complain about in Valhalla: you were all welcomed by Hermes, Zeus’ representative, who guided you to your lodgings and gave you instructions regarding your routine, the houses’ rules and your duties with all the competence and politeness expected from the Olympian spokesman; the rooms were comfortable; the food was excellent; some of the girls were good people, with whom you sensed you could be friends with. And, of course, the beauty of the lands surrounding the residence was beyond description.

Thanks to all those reasons, besides the fact that there was always interesting work to do, even you, instead of being easily swallowed by boredom, found yourself enthralled by your new life.

***

Before you had your first encounter with your possible future masters, you were told that each god and goddess there had their necessities and preferences according to their own personality, domain and history, and they would choose their disciples and servants guided by these parameters. The first weeks of interactions between the girls and the gods had the single purpose of exposing the first group to the examination of the latter, after which every girl would stay under the supervision of the deity who took interest in their qualities.

Some of these assimilations happened right in the first days, almost always involving the girls with obvious, specific talents, such as singing, crafting, dancing, fighting and similar things. Others would take longer to find their place, but eventually would fit in less famous gods’ guardianship. There were others, however, who would accept obscure positions as properties or concubines just to avoid what they saw as the humiliation of not being adopted as apprentices. You, on your side, had the misfortune of not being among the first ones to be chosen, belonging to the minority without guidance, but you already decided you would not submit yourself to dishonorable roles, not even for the gods: you haven’t left your house to end up like this. Besides, your parents warned you that one should take twice the prudence when it comes to divine matters.

***

Unlike your seeking for a divine tutor, finding a favorite place to be during the free hours of your day didn’t take much of your time – soon during your stay, you were lured and trapped by the enormous Library of Valhalla.

Since the intellectual development of the apprentices was among the criteria, all of you were granted access to the vast corridors and the colossal shelves crowded of books, parchments and brochures of every conceivable knowledge area, so that you would stay there and enjoy your right as long as you could. Sometimes, you wondered if there was something wrong in it, for you wouldn’t see more than half a dozen girls there at a time, and they would never stay as long as yourself. Or was it you that were spending too much time among the books instead? There was no way to know.

And if you were being honest, you might have had more to do inside a library than them, since your reasons would go beyond the love for learning.

Months ago, long before you were selected, a dream began to haunt you. A dream of ruins and desolation; of solitude and despair; a dream of a landscape where you were the only living being, and through which you would walk, seeking for something you didn’t even understand. The more you would search for this thing, the farther you felt it from you. Your deepest agony was that, whenever you sensed the slightest chance to find what you wanted, you would wake up and be forced to leave the nightly visions aside until the next time the dream came to you.

You weren’t cheering for being sent to Valhalla, that’s true, but when you discovered the existence of that library, the first thing you did was to start a long, detailed research in the dreams / psyche section to find clues. All the work you would do by yourself, though sometimes you wished you had someone to help you, until you thought twice and decided it was better not to involve anyone in this: that mission was yours, and yours alone.

***

That day you had the chance to start your research earlier, for you didn’t have much work to do, and the little you had was not difficult. You organized your things in the room and, once you had an opportunity, you left the company of the girls and headed to the library, to the already familiar section.

There was a specific book there that you found more interesting than the previous ones, the reasons including its updated grammar and glossary, the quantity of information and the fluid language, sparing your mind of the distractions caused by the far-fetched discourse so common in old works. It was a thick volume, with at least a thousand pages and a hard cover, making it so heavy that you were forced to slow your steps while carrying it from the shelf to the nearest table, but you weren’t bothered by this more than by the difficulties of your research itself.

The book was organized by themes, and each theme was divided in entries like a dictionary, thanks to which you advanced a third of the pages in just a few days. You were now reading an entry about isolation and comparing it to the notes you took about dreams with wilderness and ruins from another book. You hated to admit, but you weren’t seeing results in this study, since the conclusions given by the texts couldn’t be applied to your current situation in life or anything in your perspective. But you knew your dream had a meaning. It had to be that way. Otherwise, why would it keep coming back to disturb you?

You raised your eyes from the page and sighed. Maybe you should give yourself a break. There were large windows near your table that granted the readers a splendid view of the gardens. You stood up and flexed your arms, decided to go there and rest your eyes a bit…

– It’s been a long time since this library saw such a dedicated researcher.

You let out a brief scream and turned immediately to the voice’s direction: you were so concentrated in your activities that you haven’t heard or sensed its owner’s arrival. But once you laid your eyes on him, you had to lean on the table to keep your posture, for the individual you had before you was not one you would take lightly.

There you saw a tall man in light, elegant clothing and circumspect manners walking down the stairs that connected the first floor, where you were, to the second one, which corridors and study tables were invisible from your spot, something you thought to be the reason why you haven’t seen him until now. But, still...

Being able to mask his presence that way, to the point I haven’t heard a single book’s page being turned… It’s equally admirable and disturbing.

The man approached with a calm curiosity in his look, that would go from you to the papers on your table, then back to the little human who stared at him as if caught in the middle of a crime or a child’s game, or so you thought while looking at the slight curve on the corner of his lips. When he stopped in front of you, your first instinct was to step back, but the table was in your way, so you were forced to stay in your place – a normal distance for two humans, but too short when a god was involved. Because his divine nature was clear even to your untrained eyes.

No mortal could be this beautiful.

Defying the passage of time, he had the face of a young man, no marks or lines to maculate the freshness of his skin as far as you could see, though his eyes would not let you be deceived: those were old eyes, heavy with the things they’ve seen through countless ages, and sharp by the same reasons, eyes that you guessed that only a few could stand; above the left one, there was a delicate tattoo of a vine that contoured his forehead until it disappeared under the waves of his gray hair, a conspicuous yet decent attire that would soften the solemnity of his general appearance. His right ear, pointing out among his hair, was pierced by an impressive amount of earrings.

In an unforeseen yet calm move, he stretched his right hand. You startled... until you looked aside and understood that he just wanted to reach the open book on the table. He passed an elegant finger over the lines on the upper side of the page as his eyes read the sentence in a quick look, turning back to you right after.

You were distracted looking at his nails, painted with a dark shade, and needed a moment to process what he said next.

– Dreams and the mysteries of the subconscious – he started, a note of moderate interest in his tone – Many of your people experience attraction to these subjects, but only a few are willing to study them with the seriousness they deserve. But you’ve been visiting this section everyday, taking notes and making comparisons with the same passion of an old scholar. It’s a beautiful thing to see in a young person, I have to admit.

So… he has been there all this time, observing your comings and goings?

He took a step aside in order to examine your papers, and you couldn’t do anything but to look as he took your notes and lists and read them with respectful attention, then compared their content with the books, talking to himself during the inspection.

– So descriptive and organized... An excellent calligraphy… Detailed yet selective… Professional yet passionate…

The man put everything back on their place and turned to you, his inquisitive gaze making you adjust your posture.

He asked your name. You gave him the first and the second one, to which he discussed your origins.

– This is a common name by the sea lands from the … region. Are you from there?

– Yes… My Lord – he haven’t said his name yet, but you wouldn’t leave him without any treatment – My family have been living there for at least four generations. This is my mother’s name too.

He turned back to the table for a brief second.

– By the style used in your notes, I suppose you’ve been doing all of this for personal reasons – and with a soft smile, – It seems you’re trying to figure out the meaning of a dream of yours. Would you mind telling me about it?

You didn’t give him an immediate reply, though you weren’t willing to refuse the request: on one hand, you’ve never talked about this dream with any human, including the people you trusted the most, so that entertaining the idea of revealing it to a god was an even more distant possibility until this day; on the other hand, you were a young mortal from the coast, isolated in their lands now: you were aware of how silly it would be to ignore your disadvantage and say no to one of them. The thing is that you’ve been successful in avoiding this problem by keeping a safe distance from the gods you saw as the most demanding and dangerous… But what should you do when one of them suddenly appears before you and start making questions in a direct yet polite manner, in a way that you wouldn’t even call intrusive?

Perhaps all of this was written in your face, for he ended up giggling after observing you for a while.

– It doesn’t feel right sharing it with a stranger, does it? – and since you stayed quiet, – But let me tell you that it isn’t for nothing that I took interest in it. I myself have been haunted by a dream for months before deciding to come to Valhalla after answers. And, judging by the predominant symbols of your notes, such as ruins and old buildings, our dreams might have similarities. I want to find out how deep they are. And this is so important to me that I don’t mind asking for a stranger’s help to get this.

He finished that sentence with the same soft, discreet smile you caught yourself getting familiar with. Maybe he’s got a point there. And since you yourself weren’t going too far doing all the work alone, counting on someone more experienced than you, and one with a similar case to solve, couldn’t be so bad.

You sighed and turned to the table, to your papers, finally accepting to talk.

– Just like in your case, my Lord, during the months that preceded my stay in Valhalla, this dream would come to me at least one night a week. I would find myself alone, surrounded by what it seemed to a be a desert, or an abandoned land, with ruins as far as the eye can see. I would walk to see what I could find among them, but there was nothing for me there. Still, I wouldn’t try and find a way to leave that place. I wanted to stay, to touch the ruins, to move them, to build something out of them, but some strange force grips my hands, as if telling me not to be arrogant and leave them there, and this is when my hope dies and I wake up with no choice but to wait until it started again.

The man spent a moment in silence, looking at the papers, measuring your words, and during that time your breaths were the only detectable sound between those walls.

He was the first to talk after that.

– Tell me… The last night you had this dream was the one before you came to Valhalla, wasn’t it? And this was probably the time when the dream came more vividly, right?

Your eyes widened.

– How do you know, my Lord?!

Your surprise didn’t affect him.

– Because the same thing happened to me. Now, can you give this place of your dreams a more detailed description?

You nodded and went to depict the aspect of the ruins, the color of the sky, the texture of the soil, the temperature of the surroundings and everything you were able to remember. At some moments, you had to make pauses, as if the memories were as heavy as the dream itself, so that dealing with the emotions evoked by it while awake was as difficult as when you experienced them in your sleep.

There was a sensation of peace, or conciliation, in the air when you finished, which convinced you that another part of your mission was fulfilled – the initial one being the start of your research.

However, your journey for answers was just beginning, and the beginning itself was a pit deeper and darker than your young mind could conceive.

The man, as composed as he has been since the start of the conversation, turned his eyes to you, and you would swear you saw a trace of relief – even satisfaction – in them.

– It’s just as I imagined. This place… is the same of my own dreams. And I know where it is.

You gasped.

– Do you?!

– Yes. This place exists in reality. And it is part of Hellheim.

Part II

[the-eldritch-it-gay]

On Sundays, She Picked Flowers -- Review

Recently, I finished On Sundays, She Picked Flowers by the amazing Yah Yah Scholfield ( @fluoresensitive )

When Judith Rice killed her mother, she thought she put an end to the woman's hold on her. Seventeen years later, secluded deep in the woods of northern Georgia, Jude knows that the past isn't all that easy to discard. Alone with her strange house and even stranger woods, Jude must grapple with ghosts, haints, beasts, and an enigmatic woman who threatens to undo the tentative peace Jude's built for herself by fanning the violence that lives just underneath her skin.

I've been a fan of Yah Yah's for quite some time, how could I not be when I'm a horror lover? I've long awaited the release of On Sundays, having seen every update, I told all my friends about it the moment it was published, and I even have more than one copy in my home.

One of my favourite things about Yah Yah's work is how visceral it all is, something that's more than showcased in On Sundays. Visceral is a fitting description for many reasons, not only because I can feel the greenery of the woods beneath my skin, feel the rattling of a house whose haunting is architectural deep in my bones. But I can also feel the sharpness of the knife used to skin animals and cut throats, taste the stew Jude cooks from fresh liver left in pile of blood and viscera on her porch. It left me feeling hungry.

On Sundays also has haunted houses, but not in the traditional sense, and it's a ghost story, but not in the traditional sense. There are no pale specters floating down hallways of the house, but its inhabitants are haunted and hunted by the past, by trauma, and the house itself alive is sickly. It evokes the feelings of Jacob Geller's video essay Control, Anatomy, and the Legacy of the Haunted House, and it seems fitting that in On Sundays Jude is reading The Haunting of the Hill House.

And it would be remiss not to touch on the beast, the bear, Nemoira. A beast stalking you in the woods is a terror I've long loved and explored in my own writing. Everything about the beast and Nemoira is perfect and satisfies a deep love of mine, from the bloodied gifts left on porch steps to the mysterious woman showing up at the door during a rainstorm to the danger of forgetting that the woman you love is the same as the beast who pressed its teeth to your neck. I'm always reminded of some lyrics from Tamino's song Persephone,

And you've noticed it There is something right here You have come to love, yes you've come to love What you always will fear

I cannot recommend enough that you all buy On Sundays, She Picked Flowers and get the chance to read a beautiful and visceral gothic horror novel.