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#it hurts but it is natural and im not oversensitive and im allowed to feel this way
bunnihearted · 2 months
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𓂃 ࣪˖ ִֶָ𐀔
#it hurts but it is natural and im not oversensitive and im allowed to feel this way#the future i had envisioned and hoped for and believed in was just.. suddenly gone and im allowed to mourn the loss#because for an entire year i've been wanting this. and imagining it and thought of ways it could be real#and i didnt base my feelings only on imagination but on his words and him saying that we should figure out whatever was between us#and in the way we talked and what we shared and how he did start treating me as 'his girl'#which i also do not think was irresponsible nor am i upset by that. bc i wasnt 100% present bc of my avpd stuff#but it was so amazing and he was so amazing and i'd been having feelings for him for half a year before and then i only fell more and more#im trying to be as non specific as possible bc like i can only talk abt *me*.. but there were just sm other things and circumstances#so it got less and less intense.. and i wanted to give him space and patience and not push smth on him and be insensitive#then i told him abt being in love w him and wanting to be there for him w his struggles and working it out together#and im embarrassed af but i had honestly thought... that would be met well and with reciprocity...#(i understand that feelings cant be forced & im not upset or feel betrayed i just felt v sad bc i was so sure he would want me to be his gf#but i got neither a clear rejection nor much of what he was thinking abt me and what was between us. mostly just that it wasnt a good timin#so again i wanted to respect that and not keep push it. even if i tried bringing it up sometimes it never got anywhere and it didnt feel#right to just keep and keep on doing it. then there were times when i /felt/ rejection and got more hope based on interactions#truly i've been walking around for a year believing that this was smth that would come true if only we could talk#and i've been waiting and hoping and loving. and i've really been thinking of it as a real future#i even tried telling him a few months ago that if he wants me he can have all of me but he told me to stop so i did#and now i've learned that none of my devotion or hope was returned... i've been in this waiting room all alone all this time#i thought i was patient bc of all the other things but he couldnt give me a chance but he did for someone else and that just hurts#idk it hurts bc this love and connection meant so much to me and i wanted to do anything to make it work#and when u realize all of a sudden that it was only u who felt that and that future u so badly thought would happen isnt real#.... i feel extremely lost and despairing. plus it just is how i feel but i've only been this connected to him#honestly it might sound weird how i can feel this much for someone i've never met irl but he has been my only hope and comfort#for the past years he hs been my only comfort and the only thing making me feel good and ok and hopeful.... so it hurts it hurts it hurts!!
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sludgeb0mb · 4 years
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So, lambert and keira mommy kink?
Its not like lambert doesnt know hes got some hangups, ok? Hell, after everything hed been through its amazing hes only got a few. But fuck if this wasnt the worst one.
Keira knew, almost right from the start, that lambert was missing a sort of guidance. He could have a focused, strategic mind when he was calm, but other times he would lash out like a child. Keiras heart hurt for him, as a sorceress she knew all to well the pain of losing ones childhood.
Lambert had known a lovers touch, but needed the nurturing of one as well. She had been nervous at first, not wanting to be tied down by some man-child, but he wasnt anything like that. He deferred to her at any opportunity and encouraged her to do as she will. It was still in lamberts usual way, a dismissive noise when she suggested he fetch her something, but then returning with it before sundown. The way his golden eyes would shine when she praised him won her over, in the end. He was just too darling to resist.
He was useful. And sweet. And funny. And it was just natural for keira to lean in to her need to care for him, to fill the holes in his heart as best she could.
"Will you be a good boy for me?" Her cock--a soft polished wood with a metal core, was slick against him. The runes carved into the metal inside allowed keira to feel it as intensely as if it were her clit rubbing against him. Lambert whimpered below her, arching his back more to get closer to her cock while nodding into the pillow in front of him.
"I'm being good, Mommy. Please,"
She tutted, Lambert had so little patience, he was always begging for it when theyd only just started. She cant blame him, he was missing this so badly, and the heat pooling in her belly responded to that neediness.
"Okay baby, but remember we go at my pace. You dont ask for more than I give. Isnt that right, sweet?" Her thumb pushed down on the base of her cock, directing it toward his loosened hole, tip circling the rim in a way that had him tense with the urge not to push back even more.
"Yes, please mommy I wont be greedy, I promise." His voice sounded watery, as if he was going to cry already. Keira wouldnt be swayed by his tears, though. She knew when to be firm with her boy.
Keira pushed into him, just enough to allow the head of her cock to get past his rim, sighing as the magic of the toy allowed her to feel the heat of him. Lambert didnt bother holding back his moan, too focused on trying to be good and still for keira. He was whining deliciously, and as keira slid further into him it became drawn out, his voice fraying as she reached the hilt.
"Thank you, thank you," he was babbling into the pillow he was holding on to, whole body shaking with unspent energy while he waited for his mommy to fuck him. Instead, keira ground her hips against his ass, feeling the way his fur tickled her sensitive skin. Lambert was so masculine, all rippling muscles and dense, dark body hair, but when he was like this he was just her boy. Sweet and gentle and ready for her whenever she wanted.
She fucked him at a maddeningly slow pace, small thrusts that rubbed her cock over his prostate constantly while she held his hips in place. Lambert was leaking precome all over the sheets, but keira had already planned on washing them. Each slow drag felt like heaven for her, she didnt have to worry about shooting off or going soft after coming, so she could take her own pleasure at the slow build she preferred, though she knew her boy wanted more. He was sweating with the effort of it, and she leaned over his back to run a hand through his hair, causing her cock to be as deep inside him as possible. Lambert shuddered as her nails ran against his scalp, fresh tears springing to his eyes from the frustration of too-slow pleasure and her gentle touch. Her tits were pressed against him, the feeling of them so foreign with the feeling of a cock inside him. He felt cared for, but also like he was being forced to endure a punishment, and it was too much. He began crying in ernest, trying his best not to writhe on her cock even has his hole tightened around it.
"Whats wrong, baby? I thought you wanted whatever mommy gave you." Her voice was sickly sweet, unable to refrain from mocking him just a little so she could watch him cry harder. She could feel the way he tightened on her cock, trying to get more pleasure from the slow fucking.
"I-I do mommy, but," he sniffled, trying to gain composure. That wouldnt do, keira thought, and she slammed into him exactly once, her hand in his hair balling into a fist. He practically screamed, hiccuping as he tried to breathe through his sobs.
"But what, baby? If you dont like it, mommy can get you a nice plug to sit on." She wouldnt, of course, the hot clutch of him was too good to pull out. but his reaction was worth it, a hand flying up to cover the one in his hair, holding it there.
"No, no! I like it mommy, I do! Please dont stop." The poor thing sounded absolutely miserable, but she reached down to pat his cheek affectionately, making him relax a bit.
"There you go. I know whats best for you, dont you forget." He shook his head, kissing into her palm with reverence. It was a heady feeling, to have such a fierce, independent warrior reduced to this on the end of her cock, one that keira didnt see herself giving up any time soon.
She resumed the torturously slow grind of herself into him, feeling her own muscles twitch and clench as her pleasure built. She reached down around lambert, her hand ignoring his cock completely to stroke and fondle his balls. They were incredibly tight, had been drawing up since she entered him, and she loved the weight of them in her palm. Lambert gave a low moan like a man in pain, and she could feel the slick of his pre smear across her wrist. Fuck, she was getting close herself.
Nimble fingers stroked the smooth skin behind his sac, pressing as she bore down onto his prostate. Lambert jolted, his body uncomfortably hot as he endured her touch.
"Mommy, please, Im close." Lambert could barely get the words out between his tears, and keira barely bit back her moan in time. She removed her hand, giving a light slap to the head of his cock and enjoying the startled noise that came out of him.
"Didn't you promise not to be greedy? If youre a good boy and make mommy come, then Ill let you. If youre bad and you cant stop being greedy, then you get nothing. Will you be good and make mommy come?" Lambert was crying so hard he couldnt respond, but nodded. She stroked her hands soothingly down his back and sides, waiting for him to catch his breath.
"Thats my good boy, there you are. I know its hard, but you are doing so well for mommy. Here, im going to get ready for you." Keira pulled back, sliding out of lambert and making him gasp at the loss, his cute hole clenching around nothing. She reclined onto the bed, supported by a few of the many pillows they had amassed. Lambert dutifully held his position, though the shaking of his body told her that it was killing him.
"Come here, darling." She called to him, managing not to look surprised at the speed in which he turned to face her, crawling up her body and placing sloppy, desperate kisses wherever he could reach. She guided him until he was positioned over her cock, looking at her with red, puffy eyes and wet lashes. Her stunning little boy.
"Go ahead baby, remember that this isnt for you until after mommy gets to come." He nodded, lowering himself onto her cock so fast that he winced, but gave himself no time to adjust as he fucked himself on it. She pulled his hands forward to grab her tits, holding onto them with his thumbs pinching her nipples against the lower knuckle of his index finger. She smiled at him, watching him shakily try to return it as he used himself to get her off.
And gods, it was working. The magic of her toy allowing her to feel every movement, her pleasure had been building and now it was ready to crest, and her gorgeous boy working hard for her sped it along. His cock was nearly purple, bouncing with the rest of him and totally untouched. His balls looked close to bursting with how tight they were, and she knew he was so close he must be teetering on the edge but was holding back because she had told him to.
It only took a moment more until keira was coming, hips snapping harshly up into lambert as she did, the bedding below them soaked with her slick as her cunt clenched around nothing. She fucked into him a few times, riding out her high as lambert panted and whined above her. His favorite thing in the world was to please her, but watching her fall apart while he had to wait was a unique form of suffering. Keira knew this, and waited until the last of her aftershocks had faded before running her hands along his furry thighs, feeling them twitch and strain under her touch.
"Good boy, you did so good helping mommy come. Do you want your turn now?" He nodded furiously, but didnt move. She hadnt told him to.
"Go ahead baby, you deserve it. Let me feel you come on my cock." Lambert shed more tears, this time in relief as he fucked himself onto her for his own pleasure. Keira was a bit oversensitive, but hardly had to endure it as lambert came across her stomach without ever touching his cock, fully seated on her and grinding the head of her toy in the perfect spot. He managed to moan out a "thank you, mommy," as he shuddered and came, but it was barely intelligible.
Anytime they fucked like this, lambert was asleep almost the moment his head hit the pillow, barely able to clean himself up as he drifted off. That was fine, he had worked so hard to listen to her that keira didnt mind. She kissed his temple before getting up to remove and clean her toy. When she crawled back into bed, lambert was cuddling close to her, making her feel dwarfed by his size as he wrapped his big hands around her waist. She carded her own through his messy hair.
"Did you like that, baby? I wasnt too mean to you, was I?" He sleepily shook his head, nuzzling against her neck.
"No mommy, s'good. Thank you." Keira smiled to herself, feeling boneless and sated and stupidly enamored with her boy.
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