#it has caused some not rlly major things irl

[nervocat]

I hateeee having to wonder if feelings are platonic or romantic. I get them confused and and it isn't the greatest thing

[preposterousjams]

My opinion on the Latino Jason Todd headcanon

While I do understand ppl's criticism of the latino Jason todd headcanon and how its kind of racist to make the kid with parents with drug problems as the latino one, to me its more of a reclamation BECAUSE of DC's racism.

Read any 80s/90s batman issue that covers gang violence and drugs, most if not ALL of the criminals are poc; black people and latinos visibly make up the majority in the poorer neighbourhoods in Gotham. Aside from the caricaturist way they r drawn/speak, its not THAT weird cause its a reflection of irl big cities where immigrants and marginalised ppl are often forced to live in such situations, (like most of my dominican family lives in the bronx... it aint racist to say dominicans tend to flock there), BUT...the weird part is when the second a sympathetic character comes from that area, he's white and has a name thats "too fancy for the streets".

Obviously, Jason was created to look like the old robin, so I can't say that the whole "diamond in the rough" situation was purposely a tad bit racist, but its still a lil weird (especially with bruce's comment).

If Jason were a part of the overwhelming demographic in his area, the good-kid-in-a-bad-area trope has less connotations. DC is currently trying to fix this trope is by making crime alley whiter, which isn't bad but they could've just yk... humanised the non-white residents.

I also feel like the messed up way Jason was treated post-death is what makes him so relatable to latino readers. His tragic story of dying while trying to save his only living relative is turned into a lesson for newer vigilantes. Jason's particular disdain for abusers on a few occasions was twisted (by both writers and characters) into him always being dumb, reckless, cocky, angry and disobedient, always violent, never having been able to get over his upbringing. None of those things were true (he was a normal level of reckless and cocky like every other robin, not more), but its an easier narrative to digest compared to how it was in reality; a kid who worked so hard and loved even harder, died to save a woman who couldn't care less about his existence. He was an emotional AND smart kid who wanted so bad to help others get better but was remembered as too emotional (in a bad way).

THIS is the reality for many latino diasporas in day to day life; Theres no question that Latino culture is passionate and emotive, but people from other cultures assume that it is followed by instead of logical. both can coexist. emotion does not mean u have no logic. Emotions can be irrational but they aren't inherently that way, and I wouldn't say that the moments where Jason lashed out as a teenager were irrational (in og runs, not rewrites post red hood), they were mostly done to protect someone (going crazy on abusers, disobeying batman to save sheila, that time he got into a fight at school to defend his friend).

A lot of euro-centric culture is OBSESSED with the idea that rationality is separate from feelings and emotions, but not crying at a funeral doesn't mean you're better than those who do. Emotions are the basis of human ethics and morals, they define the way we interact as a collective and ignoring them does not mean they are not there. Theres no winner to a contest of who can feel the less. And the way Jason's emotions are treated (pre-rh, hes definitely unhinged afterwards lol) is so in line with how white culture tends to punish those who aren't ashamed to feel.

I TOTES UNDERSTAND that some ppl who headcanon Jason as latino are doing it for the complete opposite of reasons, like "oh here some angry emotional guy with druggie parents, haha must be latino". Its weird. I dont like it. And its only brought up so he can swear in spanish in some rlly bad text post where his emotions are getting out. But to me there's so much potential for metanarrative and commentary on how latinos are treated in media that can be exemplified through the way his character is treated. Being latino would add SO MUCH DEPTH to his character and his dynamic with the others.

[seiwas]

Sel😆!!! its the nonie with the young bittersweet relationship again (I find this title long and funny lol)! 

thank you for being so kind and genuine first of all🥺 I love talking about this with you!!! and for an emoji could I have a ⭐️ pls🥺🫶?

and I definitely agree about how it’s possible to be friends with an ex! like I think it is but bc of the history I can also see that it would be difficult😭 and kinda of nerve racking ngl, like that’s how I think I would feel about it, like there is a part of me that would be excited! I just think that I would also be a little scared because who knows how it would go🧍‍♀️because like we did used to be something more but I really did enjoy that friendship and our banter so idk😭🤷‍♀️ (this is obviously still very much causing me to overthink it lol🤦‍♀️). 

AND LMAO THE WAY YOUR BF STILL TEASES YOU ABOUT IT😭 like what that’s so silly goofy of him😭 I’m glad that he’s been such a good sport about it🥺 (also how does he tease you if you don’t mind me asking?? I just find it so endearing that you guys are so open and comfortable with each other to do that😭🫶) and the hiking pics!!!! that’s so cute!!! and especially with their hands around their shoulders like🥹

(also I’m so sorry if this response feels a little incoherent or as if my thoughts were flying in all kinds of directions, I feel like my brain was put in a blender by my professors today😵‍💫) 

I hope your day went well Sel!!! and that you’re week has been going great!!! btw I’m loving the iwa brainrot on here right now😆! I was taking peeks on here throughout the day and giggling like a maniac🤭

I wish you the best weekend ever and I hope you get to rest up and enjoy some time for yourself too!!!🥺🫶💖

omg nonie hello welcome back!! 🥺 that is such a long silly title!! 😭 we can change it to ⭐️ nonie!! hehe

and of course!! aah i love listening to the stories people tell me!! esp if it's smth meaningful to them 🥹 (maybe it's the psych major in me 😭)

i get what you mean!! omg i think esp if it ended amicably, it leaves room for so many more possibilities! who knows how it would go indeed 😭 i love reading exes to lovers tropes but wouldn't know how that'd go down irl tbh 😭 you can choose not to answer this bc it might be a bit touchy, but! do you think if you were given another chance, you'd want to try again w him? or if you were to be friends again, do you think you'd still have leftover feelings?

and my bf is so silly goofy pls 😭 i think i see bits of my faves in him everyday!! (looks like iwa, kirishima + yuuji in how kind and smiley he is, atsumu + gojo in how silly n playful he is 😭, he has a bit of deku in him too from how shy he can get w strangers! it's just a whole mishmash of them! 😭) but he's honestly the best! super chill and such a good sport!!

how he teases me about it omg in some pictures where i'm beside my 'ex-thing', he says rlly jokingly while waggling his eyebrows and smiling: OOOO YOU'RE KINDA CLOSE THERE HMMM; or he'd give me a look every time 'ex-thing' is brought up in convos, almost like he's saying '~~OH OH OH YOUR EX-THING!!' so like waggling eyebrows again and smiling HAHA i always roll my eyes and push him away when he does it HAHA we've been together for a long time and started out as good friends (5 years together + 2-3 as friends!) so i think we can be a bit silly like that bc we've known each other for so long 🥹

also no worries!! omg i feel like my thoughts are scattered all over the place all the time too 😭 i hope your day in uni went well nonie!! 🥹 am gonna start baking cookies rn hihi

AND!! THE IWA BRAINROT oh my god koi's really been feeding us lately w em i can't 😭😭 pls i'm glad u're enjoying it bc i'm dYING HSDBFHAS

hope your weekend is amazing as well nonie, you are so sweet!! don't forget to rest up too!! 🥹💗

[berniecranes]

Nothing is funnier then hearing ppl talk abt their hatred for Aldridge, or how they clown on him. Cause, like, not even ppl do that to Sal. They'll still talk abt him like he has a lot of depth when he rlly doesn't and people have their fun, which is odd. Like lol excluding the n*ke for sec ...... why else would you hate Aldridge aside from him being a traitor or just bc John doesn't like him. And it cant be bc he is """""just""""" C*A, bc John (even though everyone [at least i hope] knows and believes theyre fucking awful irl). It's so 🥱🥱 to me. You'd think Aldridge was the main villian by how ppl talk abt him lol.

Like yeah if you've played Stoned Unturned enough you might have some more, but I doubt ppl rlly catch that bc it's not talked abt much aside from a couple base John and Lincoln plot points. Which is fine. It's just so weird to me.

Bc, Idc abt him being a traitor!!!! I rlly don't. I tip my hat, and salute him for that. The n*ke and violence can be another discussion and even his treatment of civies. But it's just so funny to me. This isn't even bc my sibling is a major fan, I just don't get the big issue.

Aldridge would even be cooler and more epic if he actually seemed to lean towards more progressive views and care for domestic issues. But he doesn't. And I don't think the idea of him being that way should be how ppl take him. Just. He's really just there in the grand scheme of things. Idk what I am saying anymore just ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[fatestrings]

Yeah I think what the family needed was not only touya going to a therapist, but endeavor too because the guy’s obsession with #1 was the root cause of their destruction. I think there was a genuine, mutual connection between touya and the dad in the earlier years which probably factored into why touya was so messed up over it. Not to mention the miscommunication of it all. I also feel like too many fans exclude endeavor from young!touya’s healing when he’s a major part of it, like it or not. Idk that’s just my 2 cents. Sorry for rambling :s

Also I don’t think either parent thought he was p-slur, they just didn’t know how to talk or handle him in typical traditional asian family fashion. I do see touya thinking this about himself though.

You know what I think they *all* needed family therapy because rei showed signs of being afraid of touya ever since he tried to kill shouto plus with her own diminishing mental health she wouldn’t have been able to properly help him with these feelings inside her. They were all messed up except for fuyumi and natsuo :’s sorry last one I just had a lot of thoughts with my own family as well

no need to apologize, i appreciate that you've chosen to share your perspective with me!! it's an unexpected gift :-)

endvr cld definitely use some rehabilitation. ideally, his behavior wldve been addressed much earlier on and spared us some of the heartache to come. obv setting his whole eugenics plot into motion after only like a year or two in second place was a major issue that spoke to how flawed his psyche was; but for him to so naturally fall into that, to aquire a wife to breed and to mistreat so many people with such ease, implies that he's already been in that mentality and been allowed to get away with things for so long that it was already second nature. that sort of deep, long-term mentality takes a Lot to unlearn and unpack, even if you're fully dedicated to it. he reminds me a bit of what bakugou used to be like, at the very beginning of the manga. if bakugou had continued to have his middle-school worldview validated, to have never made or friends with or had irl role models that were such good people, to have been congratulated for every misstep, i think he could've grown into an envdr- type character.

i think the best and the safest option for the family would've been to separate him from the others as early as possible. for him to get help and try to improve, and to create a support system for him that doesn't involve anyone he's forced into a subservient role. due to the fucked-up and firmly-established power dynamics in that house, i don't think there's any potential for him having a healthy relationship with rei or his kids unless he removes himself fully from the situation and doesn't pressure them to make any contact with him. he'd have to allow his family, for once, to interact with him out of their own free will. i also think that if he's going to make an honest attempt at improving, he needs to reflect upon + restructure his entire concept of heroics. aside from his ranking obsession/ inferiority complex, he fights to decimating the "bad guy" first and foremost, rather than focusing on helping the civilians or on de-escalation, and he causes a lot of unnecessary death and destruction as a side effect of this cruel and single-minded thinking. i don't think he'll be able to treat people better if he continues fighting humans so cruelly and indiscriminately (think of his vigilante vendetta), esp not when he's publically congratulated for these "wins". (i have a bit of a bone to pick with the toxic hero-civvie-villain culture at large but that's neither here nor there...)

i agree that all of them could benefit from therapy. fuyumi and natsuo are the quietest in the family about it but they have also definitely been traumatized by growing up in that place, in a major way. natsuo's actually out of the house and has been able to heal the most out of the lot in canon, but by virtue of his siblings still being entrenched in the thick of it, he's stuck in a situation where he can either be closer with his siblings and be unable to move on from envdr, or to heal on his own and continue distancing himself even from fuyunee. and then she's got her entire life dedicated to servitude- it's apparent that she's never really allowed herself any indulgences, and she probably wouldn't know what to do with her life if she was no longer able to serve the family or her students. she took upon herself rlly early on the role of the mother and of the mediator and has obviously internalized this as her duty. i wouldn't be surprised if she felt personally responsible for like "failing her familial duties" every single time a dinner is derailed, or she doesn't manage to keep endvr's rage under control. they all need to learn how to be people, instead of tools to be wielded.

[koutawoo]

Go loot Japan in my place and have so much fun 😂

Ahh yeah same. This classes I'm taking do count as obligatory but they are general subjects everyone has to take here.

You don't have nerd energy but you sure are one😂 love that about you

😂😂😂😂I'm sure it was better tha you think but yeah the whole plot thing can be troublesome. What fandom do you think 😂😂😂😂 (ok if it isn't obvious: genshin 😂. Nothing romantic though.)

Thanksss! Now that I've tried I've noticed that I'm not as illiterate in writing English as I thought😂 Not saying I'm good or anything. I can tell it's super flawed :,) It's kind of tricky cause there is too many things for me to stress over 😂 like the grammer? The characters? Help?! 😂

And yess I'm hoping it'll help me better my English skills in general and I think even after a little rushed writing I've made some progress :D

When you have a lot pf friends but they are busy as hzbszh and quarantine was also a thing :D Some of them are going to take the uni entrance exam again this year so they don't even show up on social media 🥲😂

i hate GEs but when they overlap with my major/minors reqs… smooches

i don’t think i’m a nerd but glad u think so 🥺 simultaneously sounds like an insult and a compliment

IONO, it could’ve been hq!! and oh no, let me guess, is it related to diluc?? perhaps????

english is weird, but it’s fun when u understand the grammar mechanics?? idk why, but i enjoyed reading this grammar book i read for my writing course LMAO i only focused on certain sections because i only needed like 2-3 targets for my micro-revision and editing process of my paper but it was eye opening when i cleared up my uncertainties with punctuation usage, concision, and what not

i mean, ur very skilled in english already to be able to hold conversations (even casual ones w/ slang!) and i applaud u 🥸 i could never with my second languages LMAO 😩 i hope u continue enjoying the learning and writing process

“a lot friends” i’m staring at my childe whale plushie. yeah…. i have a lot of friends too… jk, don’t pity me, i do have irl friends but they’re not in the same city atm

but damn, u have some rlly diligent friends?? how to ignore social media. i remember i had this exchange student from korea add me on fb so we could chat before we meet. and like, she deactivated her facebook and i was so confused until she activated again and told me about her exams LMAOO 😭😭 was srsly worried there for a sec

[ts-autumns-world]

Episode 4: “Tua supremacy babey” - Lily O

I GET TO REUNITE WITH JINX YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

me waking up to see that im in the new tribe: https://media.tenor.com/images/93212119a4887f9fa0ad945c7ae2a5d0/tenor.gif

tbh i expected the swap since like we have 14 rn so its a reasonable number to do a swap before the merge.. but like this swap sucks not only me being the only one from og eener but its also me having to be with these 4 whites ppl. you know i don't trust white ppl except mikki SDFSDFSDFSDF so this absolutely SUCKS. and geekoffilm is on another tribe too.

URGH i hope i can team up with jinx and jude. and joey and i used to play together in CoW so hopefully, i am able to make him want to work with me again.. but monty... monty is very skeptical cause like they could just vote me off now. BUT THEN, i know that either jinx or raffy has the idol for sure, so maybe i need to ask jinx for that. or i just ask the person who i'll be up against with in the tic tac toe to throw a challenge if they are the og eener too. 

much to think about bestie booth. i wanna trust these ppl so bad but i have trust issues

https://youtu.be/JrXnnD5KU0I

---

naur this is the plan if we go to council

imma be like joey

you are the only cis white man on the team

you have to go. 

you wanna be an ally?

THIS IS HOW!!!

so im pushing for u FEWEJFEEFJEFEIFEFIJW 

heS ALWAYS SAYING HE WANTS TO BE A BETTER ALLY

ALWAYS CALLING ME LIKE JINX IM SO SORRY

ILL BE LIKE FOR WHAT?? 

HE'S LIKE FOR BEING A WHITE CIS STRAIGHT MAN. 

IF UR REALLY SORRY ULL LEAVE!

I have to start this out by saying Giraffez, I’m so sorry! I tried my best but too many people wanted to keep us comp strong and wanted Lily O to stay. I really wish we would have had the chance to play longer together but sometimes it’s just not in the cards.

As far as swap goes, I’m really happy about my team. We have a majority from my original group which is pretty wild. I wish Chips was here and I really hope he makes it work somehow but I’m ngl I’m a little worried about him.

I was so so thrilled to see Jinx on Tua with me. I also have started talking with Captain and Jude. They both seem super nice so as always I’m hoping to avoid tribal once again.

I’d like to the think that original Llih (was that how you spelled it?) will stay together but Giraffez told me that Lily O told her that she was voting for me. Now obviously we all voted Giraffez but I think Lily O knows I was plotting. So. I hope we can stick together. But. Yeah. Your girl is worried. And excited. She is excited cause this group seems cool. But nervous because yeah I’m not ready for another vote out. Mkay. Bye.

This swap went pretty well for me all things considered. I still have a bunch of people from my OG Tribe, and the new people seem active and really nice! So, I like my tribe. Blake offered to me today to work together closely in the game which I am down for. The semi-inactive people need to stick together and all that lmao. Other than that, I am straight Vibing

Swap time! honestly its time to kick it into high gear and win this immunity challenge! make some real allies!

HELLO AUTUMNS WORLD!!!!!! So I have arrived in a swapped team with 3 of my old members! SOOO happy Mikki is here firstly since we can discuss basically anything. Blake and Raffy im also cool with but not like as close with them. Maybe a bit more with Blake. Of the new people my fav is Chris !! Already liking our chats and hope it can turn more strategic later maybe!! Ricky is also cool and funny and chips I was allies with him in Kili which is cool but probably the weakest connection of the new people so far!! It looks like we are gonna lose and if so its kinda hard like on one hand we have easy majority to vote off idk probably chips or maybe ricky or we could go against tribal linesI think Blake truly does wanna work with me tho but is just busy. Like going against tribal lines is kinda fun but maybe dumb. And chips being the 1 in a 4-2-1 swap sucks too!! Idk kind of evaluating the vibe with Mikki and will see what we think later if we lose… we would probs be safe regardless being protected by tribal lines on one side and having developed sorta good vibes with Chris and Ricky from the other side so probs wouldn’t be targeted from that angle either?? Hopefully… I did have kind of a delayed start with the new people cuz of irl stuff but yah we will see!

My opinion on swap was initially sad because I was missing out on Jinx/Jude/Joey/Captain BUT then I realize I like this tribe?? Im with Ricky still, Mikki probably is sitting at the cookout as we spesk, Chips is lowkey goody but I got my eye on him, Benj and I bond over Agatha Christie <3, Blake I knew from TDI so we have been goofin like a Goofy movie, Raffy I actually enjoy that we chat of the most mundane things, and that's everybody! I think I have a chance to survive on this tribe

---

My thoughts are that I've got Ricky and Mikki at minimum. I know Mikki/Raffy got beef but I doubt they go for each other. Chips is like a level-headed Joey but I reckon one of him/Blake/Benj will be targeted if I had to guess. Nevertheless me and Captain talked during our matchup and exchanged info. My hope is me or Ricky are in Outhouse but I also hope not so we have higher odds to keep the goodies all goodie and safe

https://voca.ro/18WSqZznajDx

---

I LOVE JUDE

so idk where my last confessional left off but i think it was before tribal. so after tribal, jinx’s manifestations came true, we swapped, i ended up on a tribe with no one i knew except chris, so that was kind of…nnng. but hey, gotta roll with the punches. me and jinx were paired up for the challenge which game me a bit of time to talk with them, and they gave me some insight on ppl i didn’t really know on my tribe, and also they gave me a tarot reading, and it basically said that while i’m probably gonna have to deal with some bullshit, i just have to use everything i’ve learned to get over any obstacles, and stay calm and collected through it all. i’m really really praying for this one, since we just lost immunity, and now chris is going to the outhouse, i’m afraid that i’m truly all alone now. and if there’s one thing that scares me it’s being alone. i really like mikki tho, and i heard benj was good ppl. maybe if i let them know that raffy might have the half idol then maybe they’d be more inclined to work with me, but i also really enjoy raffy’s presence, so i don’t really want him to be a target. blake and i have had a good amount of dialogue so i’m hoping that he’d be willing to work with me, to be honest. ughhhhh why why why tribal. WHY TRIBAL. in all my years of playing tumble survivor i’ve never been sent to like…and exile or redemption island ONCE. not once….ever…. please god let me get to the outhouse just one time.

First of all, lemme just say I'm so amused by how quickly my chances of no-votes went RIGHT out the door. But also thank god that it went off without a hitch! And right before a swap, no less New tribe is definitely iconic. LOVE Jinx, Captain and Jude are cool too, and then my Llih buddies are also v nice to have (shoutouts monty and joey)

Tua supremacy babey

https://youtu.be/oP7DWOnmt40

https://youtu.be/Z3_pyWTdRh8

https://youtu.be/UFshPYJ98z0

hello confessional booth... i'm here to give you um. something i hope!!!! 

well since the swap, i feel like i've managed to fit in better than i expected cause ive been feeling under the weather and i don't rlly have energy to talk to anyone (which is so great that our tribe won this IC) but i rlly need to work on that more for sure..

joey wants to work with me.. like a lot. we worked together for a bit in CoW before he was voted out and he was a great ally to me back then so i think i can trust joey a little bit? and he rlly wants the pocs to go far so i think this is a good sign.

with jinx, we've been wanting to talk about the outhouse thing but jinx wants to call and i've been feeling sick so we haven't called but hopefully we can do that soon. i trust jinx a lot and i know they're gonna take care of me.

jude.. you know i like her since i saw her intro vid so yup gonna need to talk to her more!!!

lily c.. my fellow teacher pls SFSFSDFSD i enjoy our chat a lot like idt its much but every time we talk, with her, it just feels great and nice and like we just get to know each other so far so i hope we can talk game a bit more but we'll see

lily o.. we haven't talked since the day the swap happened. idk why. maybe she's busy or maybe i should dm her first so i think i'm gonna do that tmr my time if i have the energy.

and monty... PLEASE idk if i can trust monty or not. like he's a good friend of mine but my experience in orgs with them is that they tried to break the swp apart (which was smart but then mikki and i are both playing so gotta keep an eyes on them)

i'm just trying to feel good and hopefully recover soon cause i hate being sick. idk i'm scared of covid!!!!! but i haven't gone outside for a week or two methinks so we're gonna pray and see.

---

missing mikki and hope she will be fine

Blake suggested starting an OG Eneer alliance to Mikki and Benj. They took them up on the offer so I guess I am in my first alliance of the game based on arbitrary reasons. In any case, they seem to want to vote out Chips which is a RIP. But whatever keeps me safe for one more round.

I don’t have an obsession with the Mr. Robinson’s Neighborhood sketch from SNL... No I clearly don’t... https://youtu.be/whfQf3Pd5bU

It’s my chronic overthinking in this swap that is going to do me in, I feel. It’s the pressure of having to actually think differently, and coming off of EVERYTHING I’ve seen in this community over the past 6 months, oh good Lord have mercy, I feel as though its so hard for me to want to not sacrifice my game, but at the same time... I feel all the pressure in the world to flip. I did have a lucid dream that if I got to a point where I consistently voted only white people at every Council, it would make my game look REALLY good by comparison, since I literally did everything I could, and no, I don’t want to hear anyone post season say this was rigged for Jinx, it’s not, we’re only going to go against each other down the road because of how this season has been set up, and it breaks my heart

https://photos.app.goo.gl/eSvSGkc4zmBfnYVP7

So here's some tea I suppose. I was a pretty big fan of the tribe swap because people talked more in general. This was particularly interesting considering their different timezones but continued ability to keep up conversation. It was pretty apparent that I was at a numbers deficit from my original tribe but my hope was that people didn't want to play like "that" and then if they did that my former tribe would throw it to keep the numbers. Apparently that is not true as Lily C went as hard as possible to win a challenge she could have convincingly thrown as an "accident" multiple times. At any rate, based on the total lack of communication with me concerning who I am voting it is evident that either the plan is to vote someone without telling me or that it is to vote me. This means that regardless of the situation I am in a terrible position and will be leaving sooner rather than later. I don't know that I've been swap screwed in the past (perhaps, I've been playing for too long) but it really stinks. 

For the TL;DR watch this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dzftXB28gBE

 http://www.purplerockpodcast.com/wp-content/uploads/survivor-pearlislands-lillian-morris-no-sir.gif

As I'm writing this, I have a big gulp from... you guessed it... 7/11. I need to flip on one of the three of Monty, Lily O, and Lily C. My best option is going to vote for Lily O, I need Monty and Lily C to know I'm only doing this because yanno, things look awfully awful, and the pressure of making the right move and yet making sure I don't lose relationships is starting to get to me.

I also need them as shields because theyre the only winners in this game, and I need them here as shields for down the road heading into a merge.

I can't even believe I found TWOA IDOLS! I had to think a lot about who to give it too but I decided to do what felt like the smartest thing to do. Jinx and Captain already trust me and I enjoy Ricky but he gives semi chaotic energy. With that in mind, I had to give it to Jude as a sign of faith. Not only am I wanting her to do well, but I want to prove to her I legit want to work with her come merge 😊

https://youtu.be/vOn8Zsi0njA

https://youtu.be/UWTB-LYjbu0

for Chips: https://youtu.be/lSeDZdSEl4o

[onlyjihoons]

boyfriend!daehwi

a/n; i felt bad not giving magumagu a scenario of his own,, so here is an au,,,,,this is also gonna be a lil lengthy so grab your snacks and prepare yourself for the fluffiest bf au you will ever read and also i might be swerving for him thanks cheryl and im sorry jihoon

a totally last minute thing i suppose

i wanted to write to just isolate myself from reality

so ok enough deep shit w zechu

leggo

ok so

you’re in the same school as daehwi since like?? middle school or something

and ya’ll weren’t close like him and somi ukno

but still friends!!

ngl when you guys were about to choose high schools your heart decided that it was a good time to have a crush on him

i mean

just look at him

oops

pls i was snatched by the entire fancam smh

pls dont bash me

im the same age as him

moving on

he’s legitimately nice to every.single.being he meets and he just can’t seem to hate anyone tbh

and ukno those fantasies of him composing music on your anniversary??

yep

anyhow

you said your final goodbyes at the graduation

daehwi was like 

“y/n,, i have something to tell you”

your heart was bbbeating

what could it be

does he hate me

does he like me???

all those thoughts ran through your mind

and then he was like “never mind,, forget it ithinkyoudontlikeme”

you were legit so confused 

cause one time hes serious and one time hes like never mindsjdnsvibdv

youre like

“ok what i didn’t quite catch the last part”

“i--its nothing, y/n,, good luck in high school!”

and that’s how you guys parted

on the way home you kept thinking about it but over time you just forgot about it

until you enrolled into high school

it was your first day in school 

and honestly you started school not on the conventional first day of school

it was like on the second day or smth

you were so nervous cause ukno hanlim,, is a school of uber talented people

twice’s tzuyu

twice’s chaeyoung

redvelvet’s yeri

^just to name a few

and you got in by a teacher’s recommendation

by dance what’s new lmao zelia you gotta start changing ideas

ok back to first day of school

you stepped into class when it was homeroom

and you felt so many eyes on you and you wanted to cri tbh

they all look so judgemental

“h--hello my name is y/n and i major in practical dance,, p--please take care of me!”

“well, y/n, welcome to hanlim. please take the seat next to somi.”

somi. jeon somi.

you didn’t really watch pd101 during the first season but somi was well-known enough for you to know who she is

you bowed politely,, tbh you were a little scared of idols bc if you said smth wrong you would be on pann or smth for offending an idol

aND SHE FLASHED THAT MEGAWATT SMILE AT YOU AND EXCITEDLY SHIFTED OVER TO MAKE SOME SPACE FOR YOU

and you definitely was not expecting that

“y/n!! hi omg im so excited i finally have a tablemate,, lets be friends!!”

well ok ya’ll very conviniently besties at first sight 

but someone was staring at you this whole time 

and you didnt notice

lee

dae

hwi

was the one staring at you!!!!!!!

/cues signal for daehwi/

/sign nalbune signal bulnae/

you were the last person he would expect to see in this school

he knew you could dance but he expected you to go to sopa

but ok lmao he was like almost gonna burn a hole through your uniform with his stare

until the teacher noticed

��lee daehwi? please pay attention.”

you heard the teacher call out that familiar name you missed and whipped your head around

AND YOUR EYES MET HOHOHO MY DEAR READER YOURE SO BLESSED

you could barely believe your eyes but you turned back to face the front if not the teacher will call you out for staring @ daehwi lmao

somi saw you staring at daehwi and was like

“you like him??”

and you were like yes somi bingo i have liked him since middle school and i missed him so much--

but in the end you were like

“he’s my middle school classmate”

“ah really? then that saves me the trouble of introducing ya’ll”

“ok what”

“daehwi and i are good friends,, we trained together in jyp until he left for brand new music”

“he’s a trainee??”

“yeah and he’s gonna be on the second season of produce-- oops”

you were so shook there were too many things happening at once

“what omg first,, he’s a trainee, and second,, he’s gonna be on produce??? JEON SOMI WHY DIDNT YOU TELL ME EARLIER”

somi was like

¯\_(ツ)_/¯  

and soon it was recess and daehwi sped to your table and slammed his palm on the table

“y/n??? is it you???”

“no daehwi it isn’t--”

“shut up somi,,, and yes daehwi i am y/n from (middle school name)”

and lil smol practically hugged you until you deprive of oxygen 

“okok daehwi let go im dying,,”

at this point somi knows whats going on and shes just,,

“guys imma let ya’ll catch up while i get banana milk”

after somi left daehwi just HELD YOUR HANDS IN HIS AND STARES AT YOU LIKE ITS HIS LAST DAY ON EARTH

“ok daehwi i know we haven’t seen each other in a long time but you don’t have to be like this,, you’re making me shy”

“shy??? y/n omg”

“??”

“ok im not gonna be a coward,,”

“daehwi pls stop talking to yourself i’m right here”

“i like you, y/n.”

“are you hallucinating??” you let the back of your hand touch daehwi’s forehead “ do you feel dizzy?”

“i’m serious y/n!”

“we just so-called reunited 3 minutes ago and you say you like me?? im not even--

and he just can’t take it and k i s s e s  y o u

and at this point pls send your prayers for zechu

you were so shook like ???

and also your first kiss has been taken by magumagu,, youre welcome

i mean that’s how they do it in american and korean dramas right

lol

“i have liked you since middle school, y/n,, how can you not notice?”

you’re so dumbfounded you just,,

“i like you too, daehwi”

aAAAA so cute

what a way to start your first day in your high school

ok now on the real boyfriend au guys

lots of fluff ahead

u ready

gr8

lets go

daehwi is a very very very

clingy

playful

sweet

caring

boyfriend

yes

i mean he will deadass wait for you outside your house just to walk you to school

even if your house is all the way in jeju

and i can see that going on dates is never boring

be it like day dates

in the amusement park or just shopping at myeongdong

or in the arcade

one moment is never dull as daehwi will do anything and everything to make you happy

you want that plush toy?? 

hes gonna get it for you

i mean he is the 01′ version of golden child ukno

he can do everything

he got that fluffy unicorn for you in one try

and if ya’ll go out to see cherry blossoms(sigh its summer but ok lmao)

he would take rlly nice and aesthetic shots of you to post on sns

and couple pics,, ult goals ugh omg

and for eating

i saw one fanacc on twt that daehwi doesnt rlly eat well

:(

so as his girlfriend you sorta have to force him to eat

by eating as deliciously as you can

“babe look i’m eating this churro”

“mhm”

“it has condensed milk on it”

“mhm”

“i’m gonna buy a chocolate one”

“c-chocolate?”

“yeah”

/queues up in line for churros/

/gets 2 but eats both/

and be it night dates like exploring the dark town or at hangang river

he’s gonna be one of those boyfriends that use the “i’m cold” joke just to hug you

i mean daehwi’s cuddles are the best so

and go on slow walks

just enjoying each other’s presence

or maybe just a fun sleepover

watching studio ghibli

and of course,, we can’t miss out his cooking

he will deadass cook a 3 course meal for you

and you’re like

pls eat too, i cant finish all those

when ya’ll are watching the movie you would build a pillow fort and cuddle in there

“i really want a totoro irl”

“we can just get the stuffed toy, daehwi”

“no like,, the cat bus”

peck in between uninteresting parts

ya’ll might be throwing fluffy banter throughout the movie too lolol

and when you get sleepy halfway daehwi just grins to himself like an idiot and softly lulls you to sleep by singing

“goodnight jagi, i love you”

rip zechu pt 2

i can imagine daehwi being the big spoon tbh

bc he just loves you sm

he doesn’t want to lose you

OH and when he asks you who’s your bias in pd101

“jihoon-oppa”

“what has jihoon hyung’s wink done to you”

“i’m not voting for you anymore daehwi”

“oK IM SORRY”

he will practically beg you to come to the concept evaluations

bc he has worked so hard for the Never stage omg

and

his dancing

is art

a literal art i would frame up at the louvre

not to mention his singing too???????

pure honey 

when you visit him at backstage he would engulf you in a big big hug

“you did great up there,, daehwi-ah”

“its bc you’re watching me”

“aWWWWWWW”

guess who^

the Never team lmao

and also proud dad dongho lmao

he would avoid jihoon at all costs in case you fangirl and leave him alone lol

wow ok so ya’ll bump into jihoon which like have a tickle fight

“daehwi? is that your girlfriend?”

gOtTA bLaST

“n-no, its my friend...”

“oh really? i saw ya’ll hugging in the hallway just now”

“...”

“last long!”

“that’s,, park jihoon right??”

“no its park hoonji”

lmao daehwi you piece of shit

ya’ll rarely fight bc you guys are so loving both your parents and his parents practically want the both of you to get married lololol

ok i shall end it here my brain juice has run dry

please give daehwi lots of love

thanks

ok

have a good day/night friends

thank you for reading!

[yukinomonshou]

16 and 17!

16. favorite movie

Many. Many Movies can fall under this category. I like so many?? Star Wars, the HP films, the Vesperia movie (for all that i dislike the main game), lilo and stitch…..there r a lot more than are like. hovering in the back of my mind as movies i rlly like but for some reason my mind won’t remember what it is.

….I also love disney. Even if they make stupid mistakes that make me wanna scream way too often.

17.a fact about my life 

My family’s been middle lower class for. a very long time. Like? The LED TVs my family has are ones my dad won. The laptop I have is 4 years old and counting now. Heck, I think the most expensive thing we’ve been able to buy in one go in the past…idk 6 months was a PS4 for christmas. we jsut don’t have a lot of money.

`cause of that i always get super upset when people just. throw money away gambling or w/e because!! that’s money you need to live bucko. idec if you’re super good at gambling don’t do it. the vast majority lose. always. video game gambling has better chances than irl gambling, and vg gambling is alrdy steep on it’s own.

[survivorcordillerablanca]

Episode 1 Confessionals

This is an interesting tribe. I feel at a bit of an advantage being that I am already in games and at the same tribe as some of the people on my tribe right now, I just hope this doesn't turn into a total fuck fest.

SO, My BFFL Ryan is on my tribe and im so excited. I know i can trust him with everything. I'm literally meeting him in 3 weeks irl so yeah lol. DO NOT EVER SEPARATE US. Anyways, I know jordan pines from India survivor and he's ok. I don;t think i'd ever trust him, but i have nothing against him. I know he pretty pushy in games. I know Jay because he's host me like 2 or 3 times in tumblr and that's scary because he saw how i play and how dangerous my connections and social game can be. Hopefully he takes it as well she's trustworthy so i'll work with her. Who knows. I know Jay and Jordan knows Ryan and I are friends too so that is dangerous. Ryan said he knows emma and can get her with us so that be baller. I'm going to try to make some more friends.

AAAAAAAAAAAAA. It started. Right away I felt a connection with Eric, Carson, and Zachary. I'm hoping I can be more strategic in this season than in Azores. Hoping to find myself in a majority alliance soon. Also all the returning players on my tribe are so good like 1st, 2nd, and 4th. Go them! Hope that they can teach me some tricks at how to play better.

I love my tribe! Jay n Luke n Emma n Jordan are my faves so far also

Okay so i'm back as one of the eight returnees, and i'm excited. I placed second in Bahamas, and i'm planning on making it to day 39 again but this time... actually winning. HOW ICONIC. WIG! Regarding like game-related talk, i'll just go through a first impressions type thing and just ramble I guess. So first, we have Bryce. He's someone I didn't know prior to this game, but he is a returnee. I kind of clicked with him at the start... and I do kind of want to have this unspoken truce between the returnees for the most part so that the newbies don't gather together and pick us off one by one. I don't have much to say about him to be honest. Carson, another returnee. I REALLY love Carson, and i'm glad we're reunited. We have only ever played one game together, and we weren't on the same side (he voted me out at final five rip). However, as he's one of the few that I know, i'm really excited to actually work with him. In addition, he's really social with me and I feel like our conversations aren't at all fake, but more genuine, and I like that. Charlotte. We are in two games together, this and Kuang Si (TS season). Although I don't think we're super close right now, I do want to work with her for various reasons. I trust her to an extent, and she is a returnee as well. However, i'm a little threatened cause she is a winner and she seems to do really good in various survivor orgs, so that's something to watch out for. Chris. I talked to him not once. I think i'll worry more though when it's appropriate, but he's definitely on the outs for me. Perhaps he talks to others more though. Next is Eric. I knew of him before this game started, but not really. We are, like Charlotte, in two games together, but we're not working together in either. However, I do like him and maybe him and I will forge a bond, but i'm not expecting much. I'll probably just try to make him a puppet of mine (it won't work likely hehe) Katie. Katie is my favourite newbie. Like, entirely I don't know her AT ALL, but she's really social and I like that. She's also competing hard and putting in effort in the immunity, which is respectable. I feel like she's someone that will go really deep in the game, so I would like to work with her but i'll probably try to get her out early jury. Lastly, but not at all least, is Willow. Her and I have a little history. She flipped and betrayed me in a game, but then again I never spoke to her so aJSFDKGFl. I know all my friends LOVE LOVE LOVE her so I am wanting to work with her all the way. I will die for her tbh. She's a sweetheart and I think her and I connect. Overall, I think im well situated with the cast, but you never know! Whew

Wow hi this confessional is long overdue but I've been super busy but I have some time let's GO!  I'm just gonna do a tribe analysis because why not: Adam: I've probably talked to him the least out of everybody but what conversation we have had has been nice. Nothing much else to say. Emily: Jordan says that he thinks he could potentially get her to work with us which is cool. I talked to her a little bit and idk she seems kind of difficult to talk to? Like the conversation all felt very weird to me but I guess we'll see how that goes. Jay: So Jay is a winner like me which is great because I was super nervous about being the only returning winner on my tribe so it's comforting that he's here but I think out of the two of us that I'm the winner that's more likely to be targeted. I think an alliance between me, him and Jordan is in the works so that's fun. Jordan: Okay so Jordan seemed super stoked to see me on this tribe since we haven't played together since Westeros happened. He immediately proposed an alliance of me, him and Jay with Willa on the side which I am fine with because we would have the numbers to at least tie a vote if it ends up being returnees vs. newbies but we'll see. Jordan also asked for a final 2 but I'm not going to the final 2 with Jordan, no way. He thinks he can trust me but I'm going to be the one holding the knife behind his back waiting to strike. Lexi: Lexi seems lovely! We talked the first day and the conversation flowed really well and she seems awesome. Jay says that he thinks Lexi could be the key we need to avoid a tie vote at tribal council because he hosted her in India. Since she is also a winner of an ORG I think we could rope her in since the newbies might see her as a threat so we'll see. Ryan: I haven't talked to him much, he seems nice and our first conversation was about food which is my greatest interest so that was iconic. I think I'd be interested in working with him down the line but we'll see how that goes! Willa: WILLA! I think Willa is awesome, I just hosted him in Forbidden Forest and whilst he didn't do well, I know how he plays because I hosted him. I also think that my connection with his boyfriend Kai will be enough for him to trust me. He already said he wants a new Kai that can be social for him and I offered up since I'm British and about as close to Kai as you can get since I was accused of catfishing as him lmfao. I think I can use Willa as a number more than anything. PS: this confessional made me realise how much i say "we'll see how it goes" 

I have nothing interesting to report yet. Everyone seems nice so it won't be fun if we have to vote someone out this week. Hard pass.

I WANT AN ALLIANCE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I was picked a lot for the draft- nice.

I wasn't picked at all for the draft- sad.

Being that I want an alliance and I really don't care if I do bad because it's just a game, I am going to be straightforward and completely different from how I played previous seasons. Hopefully it works out for me, but I want someone who I can trust as much as they can trust me.

I'm back!!! yeah. basically, everyone i know is on the other tribe which is really ugly but its fine i guess i can make new friends/relationships/etc. i used jessy to bond with katie, so we have each other's backs, also i know zach from other games so i obv asked to work with him so we can work together and take over!! [8/30/2017 5:07:00 PM] zachary rae: is this the carson [8/30/2017 5:07:07 PM] zachary rae: like the carson that voted me out in las vegas and RUINED my dreams [8/30/2017 5:07:17 PM] carson: god... [8/30/2017 5:07:18 PM] carson: SDKJSDJK [8/30/2017 5:07:23 PM] zachary rae: ASJFKDGF [8/30/2017 5:07:26 PM] zachary rae: a tragic memory [8/30/2017 5:07:29 PM] zachary rae: how’re you long time No seeeeEe [8/30/2017 5:07:30 PM] carson: don't bring up las vegas that's ugly [8/31/2017 4:19:38 PM] carson: DSKJSDKJSD I KNOW [8/31/2017 4:19:39 PM] carson: i guessed [8/31/2017 4:19:41 PM] carson: ichinca?? [8/31/2017 4:19:44 PM] carson: i think its called [8/31/2017 4:19:47 PM] carson: we have to like... [8/31/2017 4:19:55 PM] carson: separate which ones are valid and which ones aren't god [8/31/2017 4:20:10 PM] zachary rae: so i just pick a random town or campsite [8/31/2017 4:20:12 PM] zachary rae: and "search" [8/31/2017 4:20:37 PM] carson: yeah [8/31/2017 4:20:40 PM] carson: and its once per round [8/31/2017 4:21:19 PM] carson: also idk if this is too quick but i know u and trust u so do u wanna work together kdssjk [8/31/2017 4:21:38 PM] zachary rae: oh god this idol gonna TAKE FOREVER [8/31/2017 4:21:42 PM] zachary rae: and AJSFDGK yes [8/31/2017 4:21:52 PM] zachary rae: i dont know like anyone really either and im aware of u so like [8/31/2017 4:21:55 PM] carson: god YES skjska [8/31/2017 4:21:55 PM] zachary rae: obviously im ont going to vote u out [8/31/2017 4:22:01 PM] carson: i wont vote u out either <3 [8/31/2017 4:22:03 PM] carson: I'm worried about [8/31/2017 4:22:08 PM] carson: half returnees half newbies [8/31/2017 4:22:19 PM] carson: like i feel like they could just team up?? but i don't rlly know the otherreturnees dskjsdkjs [8/31/2017 4:23:06 PM] zachary rae: AKFSDLG [8/31/2017 4:23:11 PM] zachary rae: yeah i like the returnees for the most part [8/31/2017 4:23:15 PM] zachary rae: like charlotte [8/31/2017 4:23:22 PM] zachary rae: but im also worried that the newbies will team up too and [8/31/2017 4:23:23 PM] zachary rae: yikes [8/31/2017 4:24:29 PM] carson: yeah I like charlotte/Bryce but sKJSDKJ [8/31/2017 4:24:36 PM] carson: i feel like I'm too into it i don't wanna eb hyper strateigc [8/31/2017 4:24:53 PM] zachary rae: yes yes i talked to bryce too [8/31/2017 4:24:56 PM] zachary rae: they seem nice! [8/31/2017 4:24:57 PM] zachary rae: and ASJFKDG [8/31/2017 4:25:04 PM] zachary rae: dont worry i literally am here ot have fun so like [8/31/2017 4:25:10 PM] zachary rae: if u wanna strategize im all ears [8/31/2017 4:25:14 PM] carson: I KNOW i just wanted a fun experience bc when i played [8/31/2017 4:25:17 PM] carson: challengers vs champions the main ssn [8/31/2017 4:25:19 PM] carson: i got way too into it [8/31/2017 4:25:24 PM] carson: and didn't rlly have fun?? [8/31/2017 4:25:41 PM] carson: but we gotta make up for las vegas so lets do this bitch sdjsdjk woo. those are the core 2 im planning on working with, but i definitely like bryce and wanna work with him. i want a returnees alliance just so we dont ge tpicked off, so that forces me to work with charlotte who i dont.. hate?? idk im still getting a feel for her. so, that leaves eric/willow/chris. willow sends like.. super long responses which i kinda wanna vote her out just so i dont have to send paragraphs to reply to someone, but she at least talks and is fun to talk to. chris talks the least out of those 3.. we've barely talked but i just used me knowing jenna/adam/jenn to bond with him bc he played egypt. hes ok?? i should talk to him mroe i guess. and eric.. idk i dont really like talking to eric. it sounds mean but its just the truth hes not that fun to talk to and ehes just rlly naive i guess. but i do know him from other places so i feel like he WOULD trust me. so, between those 3, my order of voting them out would probably be.. chris > eric > willow which is fine i guess?? i kinda like this tribe. also willow said compared to others i talk a lot even though we've had like 5 conversations, and i forgot that side seasons arent supposed to be as serious, so i gotta tone it down!! but.. still in this seaosn i wanna try controlling/doing good/etc in stuff and not be a wishy washy bitch. as well, in this scavenger hunt... im not as much as use with these items so im hoping our tribe does better. eric isnt rlly helping that much so if we lose, i think i would go after him over chris PURELY bc it would be easiest to rally other people against, so im hoping we win so i dont have to do that! also, i dont wanna get hte most or the least, so im gonna try and use my social game to keep me in a good place as of now, and form bonds with the returnees+ katie.

At least I'm not first boot like robbed Zoe.

So, we won by a landslide. I mean, I would consider it a landslide. It kind of sucks that they had two people not submit for them though .. it puts them at a huge disadvantage. Thankfully, Ulta was here to Play. So far everyone seems nice enough, which I've said before, so I don't really have any thoughts or anything Problematic to say. Stay Tuned. PS: Earning 193 points on my own might put a target on my head... but I'm hoping time will show that I am a flop and this was simply a fluke. 

Ugh I'm doing so bad socially. I only click with carson I need to step it up. But i send messages and they give such disinterested response but ill be persistent

whats a Cordillera