#it had been a while since i made a post about loki eh?

[rorlokiswifey]

💚🩷

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 76: Interlocking Horns

Chapters: 76/?

Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe

Rating: pg

Relationships: Loki x Reader

Characters: Loki (Marvel),

Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), Culture Clash Imminent, Protective Dad

Summary:  You and your father discuss your living situation, and you mull over your thoughts on Buridag.

Loki was agitated when he lay beside you that night. You'd spent most of the evening showing Tara and your father around to all the places you spent your time. The library, the training grounds, the courtyards, the banquet halls, the common rooms, and even the throne room, which was empty at the time. Over dinner, you told sanitized versions of your adventures; the battle with the Huldra and the Frost Giant, The magical illusion lessons, and the magic you were also capable of, how you had exploded a plate, and met the legendary Sleipnir, whom Tara demanded to see as soon as possible. You showed them your knife, and told them about your armor, and your glorious helmet.

Your father was not terribly impressed by the food. “Not enough seasonings.” he declared, and you told him about the time you'd pranked Loki by putting chili pepper in his meal. He got a good laugh out of your description of the composed prince turning purple, and trying to pretend to all onlookers that everything was just fine.

“Hope he didn't get mad at you.” Tara said.

“Nah. The thing about Loki is that he actually appreciates it when you get the best of him. He likes getting legitimately got. I get the feeling he had to deal with a lot of sycophants growing up, while at the same time being overshadowed in everything he did. Loki can sense lies, did you know that? He can just tell when you're lying. Imagine growing up surrounded by people who don't even like you, but will constantly lie to your face about it. And keep doing it even after they know you can tell they're lying. And they're still doing it! It's wild! Some of these aristocrats are stupidly bigoted, and they keep trying to fool Thor or Loki into making laws that exclude humans from things, but both of them have personal reasons not to do that, as well as political reasons. I mean, there's seven billion of us, we're not gonna be excluded from anything on this planet, and it's ludicrous to even try. But I guess they've been at this for so long, that they can't even think of doing things any differently.

That's part of where I come in. Loki says I represent an inevitability. That humans like us will come to be a part of Asgard, just like the Vanir and Alfar did before us. Some of these nobles want to put that off as long as possible, but I think Loki and Thor are right; better get that integration started early.”

“Then why is there only you?” your father pointed out, “Why not integrate more humans in a group? Why not those people in the weird lodges outside the city?”

“Couple reasons.” you said, “first off, I think they wanted to make sure humans and Asgardians could be culturally compatible. Like, that we could stand to live with one another.”

“Yeah, saw some of that cultural compatibility just a little while ago.” your father grumbled.

“We used to do stuff like that too, you know. And until recently, too. I think there's still some places that do dowries and such, just not us. But if you think about it, Asgardians live to be thousands of years old, and they used to visit Earth a lot. There was cultural exchange for sure. It's just that we change and evolve culturally at the speed of light compared to them. He really should have asked me about it though, I coulda told him it didn't work that way. He does love surprises, and he wants to preserve his culture, but we could have at least discussed it.”

“You discuss things with him? And he listens?”

“Sometimes. That's a part of my job too; advising, on human matters especially. That's why he should have asked, but I think he just really wanted to impress you.”

Your father rolled his eyes. You sighed. This was going to be difficult.

“Dad, this is so important. Doing this for me is unprecedented. I know it doesn't look like it, but we've been working hard, and dealing with some tough situations, but we've come through them all, and kept going. He's proud of me, I'm proud of me, and I am okay with my life here. I'm happy with it even. I miss you, and I know you miss me, but I like my work here.”

“You've almost died three times! In one year! Three times! Keeping you alive is the most basic possible thing, and he's almost failed three times!” he exclaimed.

“His only fault is not seeing the future, then!” You exclaimed back. “Who could predict that a crazy man would come all the way out here to try and assassinate literally anyone he saw? Who could expect that one of their own people would be so monumentally stupid as to hit me right in front of him? Why would anyone ever think that there were giants sleeping under our feet for a thousand years? How could anyone plan for any of that?”

“You're starting to talk like them, you know.” Tara pointed out. “You're picking up the accent. Your vocabulary's changed.”

“I've been studying a lot. I hadn't noticed the accent though. Is it very obvious?”

“Eh, it's no big deal. If you'd just moved here on your own, you'd probably sound kinda Icelandic anyway. I just think it's cute, you sounding like all these high-falutin', fancy alien folks.”

You wanted to thank her. For years and years, when you and your father had started arguing, she would brazenly interrupt with something completely off topic, and completely derail the dispute. Your father was as passionate an individual as you were, which was probably where you got it in the first place, but Tara had always known when to interject.

“The point is,” you said, much more calmly, “is that the world has gotten weird. And since I've been studying, I've been finding out that it was weird in the past too. We've just been coasting by on a short period of relative calm, but it's not going to last forever. In fact, it's over. There is an entire alien species  living on Earth now. Nobody has to like them, but they are here. Loki can't demand forgiveness, and he's told me he's prepared to accept that there may be people who never accept him, no matter what he does. But he is doing things. He's doing good for his people; he knows how to do that. He's trying to do his best by me, and I'm helping him to know how to do that. I clearly need to communicate with him a bit more about that. He doesn't have to do any of this, but he chose to. From the beginning, he chose to do this. I mean, don't get me wrong, he sucked at it in the beginning; he had no idea what he was doing.  He was kind of an overbearing creep, and when I got hurt the first time, I swear, he was inches away from locking me away in a closet somewhere so no one else could hurt me.”

Your father raised an eyebrow.

“Yeah, he totally freaked out. I had to convince him that there was no way he could protect me from everything, but he sure wanted to. I wasn't gonna let that happen though. Maybe I can't leave, but I haven't let this place become a prison either.”

“Baby girl, I'm proud of you, don't ever think I'm not, but a father really never cares for a man who takes his daughter away.” your father said, “I don't think he deserves your defense. But you seem happy, and that's what I'm supposed to care most about right? I'm not gonna be his friend, but I'm not gonna cause trouble while I'm here, for your sake, and also because I gotta represent humanity, right? I love you, and I'm not trying to ride your case, I just don't like that guy. I'm not as forgiving as you are. But I'm not gonna get into a public fight with him or anything.”

“Thanks. And hey, I'm not gonna demand that you be friends with all my friends, I just have a really big day looming over me, and I'm already stressed. But, like, if you have any questions, now is probably the best time.”

“Oh, I got a few!” Tara said. “What actually is wrong with you?”

“Uh, loaded question.”

“No, no. I mean, yeah, but no. I mean, you said these guys were taking care of your medical problems, but you never actually said what they were. Have they figured out what's going on?”

“Ehhh, kinda. It's not exactly a medical problem. It's this.” You held out your hand, showing the mark. “You know how we couldn't figure out what caused this? It's magical in nature.”

“You told me you got drunk and got a tattoo!” your father accused.

“What was I supposed to say? I didn't know what had happened at the time! I didn't even know it was Loki I had grabbed, I didn't find that out until later. Tara saw: I took his hand to get his attention, and this shape burned into my palm. It did the same to him, I found out. It made us both sick. But when we're close together, we heal. Even when I got hurt, being close heals me faster. This is also what woke up my magic. It was always there, but this was what made it accessible. The whole thing is just magic. The only thing we don't really know is why it happened.”

“Magic. It's so weird.” your father said. “It just doesn't make any sense. What is magic? How do you do it?”

“It's a kind of energy manipulation. Like electricity or solar power, but it's less generalized. Like, some things are actual spells that always work the same way, but I haven't learned much of that yet. Gotta get my specific magic under control first. I'm getting pretty good at it. I do it by...well, it feels a certain way. So I concentrate on feeling like that...”

A bowl of apples disappeared from the end of the table, and reappeared in your hands. Both Tara and your father leaned away in surprise as you set the bowl back on the table.

“I move things from one place to another. I don't know the upper limit on size or distance yet. Maybe someday I will move mountains.”

“Does that scare you?” your father asked. “All this magic stuff?”

“Sometimes. It's so strange to think that it's me doing this, and not some woman in a book, or a movie. That it's really real. Even after everything that's happened over the past few years, it's still hard to really understand that all this is real. That every single person you've seen here is hundreds of years older than you, and was born light years away, in space, on a whole other world. That they have millions of years of history that I'm learning about. Some of these people remember a time before the language we are speaking even existed.”

“That's freaky.” Tara said.

“Don't I know it. But somehow, they manage to live in the moment in a way I find kinda enviable. They're looking to the future, but they aren't worried about it like I used to be. It's so liberating not to have to worry about that. About rent, or healthcare, or who's gonna take care of me when I get old, or if I'm even gonna get old. All of that has been lifted off of me, and I'm free to study and learn, and be something unique, and I actually really like it.”

“I'm glad for you.” Tara said. “So who's your tailor?”

You giggled. “I'm super fashionable, for someone a thousand years ago, aren't I? This isn't actually Asgardian fashion, exactly. It's more of a fusion. Isn't it fancy?”

“It's freakin' gorgeous. Is it some kind of uniform?”

“It didn't start out that way, but it sorta became that. The seamstresses hadn't visited Earth in like, a thousand years, so all the illustrations and memories they had were from then or before. So at first they thought that must be how I was supposed to be dressed, and then it just became my signature. It's really comfy, and pretty, and most importantly, it's warm. I mean, I know the place is called Iceland, but I was still surprised at how cold it gets. If you want, I bet I could get you some.”

Tara went to bed happy, and your father went to bed grumpy, but quiet. Then you went to bed, and Loki slunk under the thick blankets with you, holding you uneasily.

He got like this occasionally, cradling you as if he feared you would disappear in the night. It wasn't any real surprise, when you thought about some of the things he'd been through, the abandonment, the loss. You knew he wasn't, and would never be perfect, but you were still prepared to defend him to all comers. You weren't going to vanish from his arms, but you'd probably have to prove it every night. You could do that. You were more than willing to; there hadn't been another man in your life that had made you feel so safe and comfortable when sleeping, and you wanted to keep that feeling.

Tomorrow was the first day of Buridag festivities. Loki said it would start out with a parade that would lead to the site of the new courthouse. There would be traditional poetry and song, and everyone would perform the building task that had been assigned to them weeks ago. Then there would be the First Feast; a meal composed of worker's foods, prettied up for the nobles palettes. You'd seen the menu; it was grain salads and porridges, hearty soups and rustic breads with eggs, jams, young cheeses, winter vegetables, dried fruit, and herbs and spices in approximation with traditional Asgardian flavors. It was a reminder that, in Buri's day, Asgard's prosperity had not been assured, and many of the working class had to make do with rougher fare. Supposedly, the First Feast was meant to rebuke those who took workers for granted, and remind everyone whose hands had built their world.

Personally you thought that was a little patronizing, but you also didn't come from a monarchical culture. Perhaps this was something like an Asgardian Saturnalia, a festival of transformation. A celebration of something being built from nothing, Asgard being built by Asgardian hands.

And yours. Loki and Thor would be laying the foundations and blessing them with some of their more ephemeral power, the thing that awoke the primordial fear in you, made you instinctively cower and search for a tree to hide in when Loki became truly angry. The power that was beyond magic, that reached into the divine.

You, however, had been assigned a brick. It was a decorative brick, that would line a window, and it lay in a stack of other window-bricks at the site. Just one piece of a huge community project. You rather liked that. You knew for sure that the aristocracy did not engage with the common Asgardian nearly often enough before the tragedy of Ragnarok, but now both Loki and Thor went out among their people often, nobles and commoners mingled every day, and the community was becoming less and less divided. There were people who resisted that, of course. People who wanted to claw back every ounce of their perceived power, who tried to pass deliberately discriminatory legislation, people who simply hadn't yet come to accept that their lives had changed.

You were change. Loki was very approving about it. You represented the New, the Necessary Change, the Social Upheaval that led to a Bright Future. You couldn't help but wonder if that was too big for you to carry all by yourself. On the one hand, you weren't exactly alone; Loki was beside you all the way, Andsvarr, Saldis and the Valkyries supported you, even down to the twins. Saga, and even the strange Lofn approved of you.

On the other hand, your father was right; you were still the only human who actually lived here. The first and only human with Asgardian citizenship. A trial run, essentially alone, to see if you, as a stand-in for all humankind, could make it. It was heavy.

But you were doing it. In a little less than a year, you had learned a great deal of Asgardian history and law, had helped actual royalty with things like resource management and policy reform, learned knifework, learned actual magic! You had met several of Earth's greatest heroes, were going to be titled, were becoming a liaison between Asgard and the human settlements growing next door. You had learned some Asgardian, become a prince's lover, and even learned how to play a drum. You yourself were becoming something new. Embodying the Necessary Change.

And maybe that was what you had needed in the first place. For so long, it seemed like you had been trying to let go of an old self, let go of everything you'd gone through. Shed your old skin and emerge, clean and soft into the light of a new day. And so you were. You just hadn't realized that once you started, it would happen again and again, skin after skin, quivering and raw. But you felt new. Despite the pressure, you felt new.

[sillyfudgemonkeys]

p5 spoiler ask: so lately i've been seeing "Futaba's mom performed human experimentation in her research on cognitive psience so Goro was justified in killing her! She experimented on him!!" and I'm like "wait wtf?? where did you get THAT from?" so like, since you're persona lore savvy, is there anything like that regarding wakaba or goro? Am I missing some context?

Sorry for the late response, I know what you are talking about but it’s been awhile since I read the posts (and I dunno who made them so rip). I tried looking for them but.....eh.....yeah (having a hard time finding the ones I recall).....I think it came from P5R, there’s hints at it and at most it’s a theory. I mean one of the hints is the featherman game (which I don’t think I��ve played yet). There’s also this Person’s timeline (it’s a game tho so like....yeah), the issue I have with it is saying Wakaba had a Palace and she experimented on people and it’s stated in the artbook. So I have the artbook, I guess I’ll need to re-read it, but going to Wakaba’s section I don’t see any of that info.....I do see a concept art of what looks like her experimenting on something (might be a shadow, it’s not 100% human looking), but it’s a concept sketch.....not an actual lore bit......but maybe there’s something written in a small portion of the book I’ll have to look for (unless it’s a different artbook then I’m a bit SOL atm lfkdsajf;j)

I’ll have to do my own research, cause I dunno I don’t really like this theory, takes some agency away from Goro imo. But here’s just some bullet points of info to save time:

It’s just a theory atm from what I can tell, nothing really confirmed but people are taking it as canon I guess? (anything to justify Goro I guess >.>). Anyway lord knows this might bite me in the ass cause I’m using Vanilla over Royal translations looking at the scene (but it’s the first thing that shows up so I don’t care). But here’s an issue with the timeline:

Wakaba has possibly been researching prior to Goro meeting with Shido

Shido has already been dabbling in cognition (probably cause of Wakaba, not stated tho)

Goro approaches Shido with his powers......BY MAKING SHIDO’S OPPRESSORS GO PSYCHOTIC!

iirc if she really did that to Goro he’d have mentioned it. Apparently he speaks with familiarity to her and not to Okumura (but that could be chalked up to him reading her research). 

So some people say Shido/Wakaba taught Goro to do Psychotic Breakdowns and it’s like????? No Goro had that power to begin with, and I don’t think we have enough evidence or reason that he can do PB without fully summoning his Persona (since it seems tied to Loki). 

Also things to keep in mind:

Having a Palace doesn’t mean you are a bad person, Futaba proved that

If Wakaba did “experiments” A) it might not have been Goro, B) experiments doesn’t automatically mean something illegal and inhumane lksdjaf;jfj She could’ve had volunteers. Not everything has to be a copy of Sho/Strega/Labby (a bit reason I don’t like this theory tbh).

Concept art isn’t 100% canon, same can be said about cut content found in the game. While it can explain some things, it’s not in the final product so it’s possible that the creators had that idea and decided not to go with it. Always take it with a grain of salt. 

I need to look into it more (and find more of these posts, if y’all wanna send them to me I’ll read them). But yeah sorry I couldn’t go into more detail, I need to refresh again and do more research (it doesn’t help that when I first read this stuff I filed it under “theory but I debunked/found contradictions it in my mind already and thus I shall forget it”

Edit: I should note while I don’t like the theory (and/if people are toting it as fact, and if it someone is retconned as fact later I still don’t like it for reason fdsklafja;fj but atm it’s not fact yet), I do find it is 100% fine to hc for fun and explore it klfjsdalfkjaf

[bruciewayne]

5 minutes

stevetony post-avengers, 2012 era, getting together, fluff, 2.2k

for ‘steve rogers’ on @iron-man-bingo​

--

At first, Tony didn’t know what to think of Steve Rogers. Actually, that’s a bald-faced lie. He knew exactly what to think of him; arrogant, pigheaded, stubborn, and of course, nothing like the stories. At all. But apparently, he’s been under the influence of Loki’s sceptre (yeah, that guy from Norse mythology who fucked a horse (Tony’d went on a week-long wiki-venture in the middle of writing his thesis. It’d been a tough time.)), so it didn’t count, he’d apologised after.

They did say ‘never meet your heroes’ after all. 

When he was younger, he was so sure that if he ever got to meet Captain America he’d hug him, thank him for his service. When he grew up, he promised himself that if they ever found him, he would deck his probably-perfect teeth. Adult-Tony does neither.

Adult-Tony keeps his distance. He so badly wants to punch him, because of everything his father said, but he feels as though he should wait until he has actual, reasonable grounds to punch him, things he’s done, not what his father did. The fact that his face would most likely break his hand also factors into his decision of simply shaking his hand when they part ways.

They’ve had a couple of small, quiet moments, mostly amidst battle, that make Tony think that maybe he’s not an asshole, and maybe he could get to know him, but at the end of the day, Tony really doesn’t know what to think of him, he’s good in the field, he’s a good leader, but outside of that, he doesn’t really know him. At all. 

Thanks to dear old Nick, that changes, fast.

Well, about half a year after New York, maybe a month after his whole Mandarin/Killian. He spends the time ‘bettering himself’ and getting on and out and back in and then permanently out of a relationship with Pepper. On one hand, he hasn’t been all too productive (making, then destroying dozens of suits cancels each other out, really), on the other, it makes him a prime target for Fury to shoot at.

“You told me the Initiative was scrapped,” Tony says. He can’t believe he actually went to SHIELD for this. He, by choice (like, 21% choice) went into SHIELD HQ, to talk to their resident pirate. About letting five strangers move into his tower. 

“You assumed the Initiative was scrapped, assumptions just make an ass of you and me, Stark, you know that,” Fury says, evenly, “you have the space and the funds. Stark, you know that something like Loki is going to happen again, the best way to prepare for that is like this, all of you under one roof, learning to become a team.”

“Your little boyband saved New York, once, by the skin of our teeth, and now you want us to protect the word.”

“Your boyband, and you lot aren’t the only people in my phonebook. Look, all I want is for you to become a team, for the future,” Fury pushes a manila folder to Tony across the desk.

The Avenger’s Initiative

“Fine. You owe me,” Tony concedes, leaving the room. He doesn’t take the file.

Within a week, he has two more assassins under his roof, with the next he has another scientist (a biologist). It’s awkward, for a bit, everyone staying in their own corners, so to speak, until Agent Bart-- Hawke-- Clint proposes weekly movie nights (Tony just thinks that he wants an excuse to watch movies (they’re going to be very good friends)) and much of the awkwardness dissipates.

It’s fascinating really, they know each other so well on the field, they work seamlessly together, but put in a civvie, normal, situation, and now no one knows where to sit, but the movie night thing helps and everything just clicks. Tony thinks he has friends now.

Except there’s something, someone, missing.

He doesn’t even know why he wants him here so much, it’s not like they got super close or anything,the four of them click, and based on what Clint says, Thor would slip right in and he’d barely be here anyway (which is a shame, because Tony really wants to get his hands on that hammer), but none of them know their captain at all and Tony can’t help but look at the four of them and think there’s something missing.

“The god and the legend too good for us?” Tony asks Natasha one morning. She’s the most open and vulnerable she’s been ever since she started living here, maybe a month ago; she has messy hair and she’s wearing a hoodie at least two sizes too big. It might be Clint’s. Tony’s not going to think about it too much. (And if he wasn’t in fear of attack-via-butter-knife, he would call her cute.) Anyway, he’s asking her because she’s the one reporting to Fury at the end of every week, and out of her and Clint, she’s more likely to tell him something (Currently, Clint’s giving him the silent treatment for putting purple dye in his shampoo (he drew over Dum-E with glitter glue (He’ll never admit it but Dum-E likes it))).

She gives him a look he doesn’t really want to decode. “Thor’s dealing with his own stuff, off-world, and Rogers is still at SHIELD.”

Tony gives her a disbelieving look, surely the team captain should be with them, and not in a cinderblock room eating crappy food (Tony’s been to SHIELD HQ exactly once in his life and never in the residential areas or the cafeteria (In his defence, he’s not too far off)). 

Looks like he’s going to be getting another stamp on his SHIELD loyalty card.

It doesn’t take much to find out where Rogers is, a little hacking tells him his apartment details and a little more gives his security camera access. Rogers is pitifully predictable, Tony watches what he did in the past week, cutting between days and decides he needs saving. 

All he does is go to ‘class’ (some guy explaining something, probably everything that happened in the past 70 years, while he takes notes. Captain America takes handwritten notes. (He should mention that he has godawful handwriting (Maybe Tony enhanced the image out of curiosity, but only JARVIS knows that and he’s well aware of the national ‘no snitching’ policy), he should also mention that he’s a doodler. Tony’s far happier than maybe he should be to find that he has a flaw - not so perfect now, huh Dad?)) and the gym (maybe he’s untouchable but damn Tony really wants to touch those muscles) and that’s it. He also leaves for hours at a time, only at night, and Tony could probably find where he goes, but SHIELD most definitely already does, and he thinks the guy deserves a little privacy from him (He leaves when the sun sets and comes back when it rises and looks the exact same. Not particularly suspicious until you realise that it means that he doesn’t sleep. Not Tony’s problem - he probably has therapists anyway.). He’s going through the motions, head down, quiet, Tony doesn’t think that he’s seen him smile the entire week.

JARVIS tells him that the sun sets in just under 20 minutes. He takes the suit.

“Going anywhere?”

“What the-- Mr. Stark?”

Tony’s always enjoyed the dramatics. He steps out of the shadows, still in the suit but with the helmet off, to face Rogers, legs straddling motorbike.

“Eh, call me Tony,” he says, casually leaning against a concrete pillar. God, the SHIELD garage is depressing. SHIELD is depressing.

Rogers still looks confused. And ready to book it straight out. “Anything I can do for you?” 

“Come live with me.” Tony’s been told that statements usually make people do what he wants, instead of questions, and this statement is to a living legend, the Great American Hero. Telling him to live with him.

Rogers looks even more confused, “I already have a place?” He says, like even he’s not too sure.

“Fury didn’t tell you? Everyone has to live in Stark, well, Avenger’s now, Tower. For team bonding or something. In all honesty, I think he just wanted to get Legolas off his back, so to speak.” When in doubt, talk.

“Legolas?” Rogers still looks confused, but under it, there’s excitement, or proudness, or something, like he’s trying to tamp it down.

“Yeah, archer from Lord of the Rings, sequel--”

“To The Hobbit!” 

Tony expected many things from him, straight up refusal was one of them, but not excitement at the Hobbit. If he couldn’t easily throw Tony a city block, he might have called him cute. (Whatever, he’s goddamn adorable, okay?)

“Yeah, kid,” he says, voice softening of it’s own volition. He clears his throat before he says anything more.

Rogers smiles at him, small and shy, and fiddles with something on his bike. “Were you, were you serious?” He looks at Tony likes he’s expecting him to pull the rug, yell ‘Sike!’ and fly away cackling.

“Yeah, you were meant to be there since the beginning,” Tony wishes that he has that file, from so many weeks ago, just to prove to him, ‘Look, you’re meant to be with us’. Fuck, a couple months ago he was ready and willing to punch this guy in the face and now he wants to wrap him in a million blankets and make him marathon the extended versions of the Tolkien-verse movies until he’s happy.

He’s going to be having words with Fury.

“Oh,” he says, like he never really considered that, “when can I move in?”

“Now’s always good,” Tony replies, challenging him with a raised eyebrow - ‘now’ means breaking out of SHIELD, ‘now’ means no more lectures from SHIELD personnel.

Rogers brightens up, it’s not much, but a 0.2V lamp in a basement seems like a quasar. (And if it makes Tony himself happy, to see him like this, well, no one has to know.)

“Let me get my stuff,” he swings off the bike and that should not be as attractive as it is. Bikers never really interested Tony, but there’s something about this one in front of him.

Tony comes with him, still in the suit, because he has to see his cinderblock in real life - hopefully the camera made it worse?

The camera did not make it worse. It takes him under five minutes to pack, and everything can fit in a standard backpack.

By the time they get back to the garage, Tony learns a couple things: 1. He knows what the internet is, and enjoys it, 2. The lessons are going incredibly slowly and he watched some Youtube videos and went on Wikipedia and already knows everything they’re telling him (they’re at the 70s and they skipped the formation of Queen), and finally, Steve Rogers, not Captain America, because in that short five minute walk he’s learnt so much about the man behind the mask he’s determined to never let him be forced behind it again, Steve Rogers is a nerd, a geek and a little shit.

And lonely. So fucking lonely. They pass so many people, walk straight through the canteen, twice, and while, yes, they get some double-takes (mostly baby agents (they’ll grow out of it)), no one says hi, or waves, or greets them or anything, even the guy who Tony recognises as Steve’s ‘teacher’ doesn’t say anything when they pass by in front of him.  

He’s entirely untouchable, a living legend, Tony gets that, hell, even though that ten minutes ago, but under all that, under the fanfare and the applause and the costume, he’s a person, curious, bright, intelligent, funny, flawed. He wishes more people knew that.

“So, how fast can that new-fangled suit of yours go, Mr. Stark?” Steve asks putting on an ‘old Brooklyn’ accent and tilting his head and scanning it up and down as he straddles the bike again, bag on his shoulders.

“Fast enough,” Tony replies narrowing his eyes.

He grins. Bright and unabashed and it’s wonderful, but Tony only gets to see a second of it because he’s whipping out of the garage, yelling “Race you,” over his shoulder.

Tony’s laughing as he engages the suit, snapping up the helmet and following hot on his heels.

(They tie (4. Steve Rogers drives like a madman), shaking on a rematch.)

((It’s the happiest Steve’s been in the new century, in his life.))

It takes them a while. It takes them so fucking long even the new baby (practically foetus) agents are done with their shit. 

It takes years of longing looks and brushed hands and secret smiles and quiet nights and flirty one liners and compliments, but eventually, eventually, Tony admits to the torrent of butterflies that inhabit his insides whenever he even looks at Steve and he kisses him, grinning so goddamn bright Tony’s positive his heart is going to burst.

“You gave me a home,” Steve admits quietly to him. Tony can’t see his face like this, in his arms, but he can kiss the side of his neck, hopefully communicating more than he ever could with words. Steve gets it. 

“You make me happy,” Tony says, simply, into his skin, holding tighter.

(They tie the knot three years after that (the baby-- toddler agents yell Mrs. Rogers to Tony and Mr. Stark to Steve for a month straight (Tony doesn’t think too hard about the implications)))

((It’s the happiest Tony’s been in his life.))

--

iron man bingo masterpost

ao3: ineffablestarkrogers

[omgviolette12]

After Hours - A Professor Loki fanfic

Summary: Evelyn Monroe has been a TA for professor Laufeyson’s Calculus course for four months now. He was known to be quite strict, but that never deterred her from applying for the position in order to be close to the man she had been secretly pining for. One evening, she returns to his office after opening hours… and with her bountiful luck, she walks in on something not meant to be seen.

Warnings: Explicit sexual content, Eventual Romance/Smut

Pairing: Loki / Original female character

Chapters: 1/?

Words: 1681

A/N: The professor Loki fanfic you never asked for  ;.; I was gonna wait till I had like… six chapters written in advance till I posted this, but fuck it. I’m fairly consistent, so you don’t have to worry about ‘when the fuck is this gonna update!?’ Anyway, let me know if it’s good so far.

Come check this out, babes!: @milkymaidme @dangertoozmanykids101

                                        _________________

“Excuse me! Sorry, please move! I said move!”

Evelyn spoke as she weaved her way through the busy hallway, bee-lining straight towards Professor Laufeyson’s office.

She had been absent not once, but three times the past two weeks for each one of their meetings, and she could feel that his patience had long vanished.

Until now, being a TA for his calculus course had been smooth sailing - contrary to what herself, and everyone else who had taken his class thought.

When Evelyn opted to take calculus the previous semester, she had already braced herself for failure. Math had never been her strong suit, barely passing even the most basic of classes despite her studious nature.

But under his tutelage, Evelyn had unexpectedly grown a deep love for the subject - and the professor himself.

In class, while professor Laufeyson could be unbearably strict most times, he never failed to find innovative ways to make each lecture fun and engaging. Not only that, he was extremely patient with her when she came for extra help during his office hours. She had even breached his lunchtime on multiple occasions, and not once did he turn her away.

That was why after passing his course with flying colors, Evelyn decided to apply for the TA position as soon as it opened. Admittedly, she had grown attached to the man; not only was he knowledgeable in mathematics, but with subjects ranging from history, literature - anything she could possibly think of.

But now, as she raced towards his office, she steeled herself for a harsh tongue-lashing from her scary professor. One thing that professor Laufeyson hated the most, was tardiness. He had been lenient with her thus far, and Evelyn feared he would think she was taking advantage of his good-will.

Reaching the door to his office, she swung it open in haste.

And there he sat, his mere presence exuding authority. One long elegant leg crossed over the other as he flipped idly through a book, not sparing a glance in her direction. He was even more intimidating with his sharp way of dressing; White dress shirt pressed to perfection, covered by a dark, slim- fit suit vest. Evelyn was a sucker for men in suits, and her professor wore them like no other.

She scuffled inside, closing the door behind her. Evelyn made sure to check if it was closed correctly - perhaps due to its age, the door refused to click most times.

After doing so, she walked to stand in front of his desk, shuffling awkwardly on her feet as she waited for him to speak.

It took several beats of silence before she finally heard his cold voice, “ Enlighten me…what day is it, Miss Monroe?”

Shit…what was today?  “Uhm…Taco Tuesday..?”

He looked up from his book to give her a sharp look, “Is this a joking matter to you?”

“N..No..Nope! Uhm..I don’t- what… what was today suppose to be again?”  Really Evelyn? Taco Tuesday? That’s the first thing that came to mind?

Sighing, her professor pinched the bridge of his nose before lifting a sheet of paper into view with two fingers.

Teaching Assistant Evaluation Form: Midterm Progress

“I am highly disappointed in the effort being displayed thus far, Miss Monroe. Out of all my other TA’s, I expected much more from you.”

Evelyn gaped stupidly at the paper in his fingers, and then began to panic internally. She had no idea TA’s had midterm evaluations, so she did plan on slacking a tiny bit until finals rolled around.

As an art major, taking three studio classes began to take its toll - so much that even professor Laufeyson became an afterthought. But now faced with the danger of failing, she would have to re-organize her priorities.

“I understand that you have a lot on your plate this semester. However, I would advise that you treat all responsibilities with equal priority.”

“Yes…I’m sorry professor, I promise to make up for all the lost time…”

The look he gave her after she said those words made her extremely uncomfortable. Sharp, and burning with intensity. Uh…did I say something wrong?

Having noticed that he must’ve looked off, he turned his head abruptly back to his book.

“Actions speak more than words, Miss Monroe. Now sit. You have much to make up for.”

And so, for the next three hours, Evelyn worked hard in the suffocating silence of his office grading one too many papers. Her professor never talked much, granted. But he wasn’t usually this quiet with her.

Over the past four months as his TA, they had developed a sort of… companionship. If you could call it that.

She was intimidated at first- and still is, but he was surprisingly easy to converse with. After she assisted him with whatever he had on his plate, they would usually fall into casual conversation, and talked about all manner of things that inevitably drew them closer.

But now…she could sense that he just was watching her, and she could barely concentrate on grading due to nerves.

Evelyn raised her head from the papers to chance a glance at her professor - and sure enough, he was staring at her with furrowed brows, and narrowed blue-green eyes.

What.. what’s his deal? He’s acting so weird…

Evelyn cleared her throat stiffly to breach the silence, “Uh… is everything okay?”

He shot her the unfriendliest look she had ever seen on his face, but spoke in a calm voice that did not match it, “You pull three no-shows, show up late, and then have the audacity to ask if everything’s okay?”

Welp…guess I shouldn’t have asked…

He closed the lid to his book a bit too harshly, causing Evelyn to jump slightly in her seat at the sudden sound.

“You’ve done enough, you may take your leave.”

Evelyn glanced down at the pile of papers she barely managed to make a dent in, “ Oh..but-”

“It is lunchtime, and I’d like to eat in peace. Now please leave.”

At his stern command, Evelyn gathered her things quickly before walking to the door. She glanced over her shoulder to look at her professor one more time, guilt weighing down her heart as she watched him gather the large pile of ungraded exams in front of him.

While she was a student in his class, professor Laufeyson always went above and beyond to make sure she knew the material and spared no effort in tutoring her when she asked for help. He was a busy man, so he rarely showed any other students the same courtesy.

But her lack of effort and laziness not only gave her a poor grade, but unnecessary stress to the person she admired the most.

No wonder he was so affronted with her.  She was a terrible student, in addition to being a terrible friend.

Evelyn walked a little around campus aimlessly with a heavy heart, until she went inside a cafe across the street.  

She loved the place - it had a cute little reading corner at the back, and she would always order a huge slice of lemon cake to eat while she studied.

And at the thought of cake… Evelyn was suddenly struck with an idea. She recalled, during one of their many casual conversations, that he mentioned having a bit of a sweet tooth.

Even if she couldn’t make up entirely for her poor work ethic, she could at least treat him to a nice, big slice of cake as a start.

After studying for a few hours, she went up to the counter to order the biggest slice of lemon cake they carried.

It was around six in the evening by the time she left the cafe, the skies now a dark purple hue as she scurried across campus with a large cake box.

The cake’s size was a bit overkill -  but like her mama always said, go big or go home.

She just hoped he was still there around this time. More than likely he is, with the amount of work she left behind.

Evelyn entered the now empty building where his office was situated, taking care to walk as slowly as possible. She could be a bit clumsy when she was nervous, and at the moment her heart was beating a mile an hour.

Just give him the cake, apologize again, then head on home. No biggie.

He was really pissed with her earlier on though, and she hoped he cooled down considerably since then to accept her gift graciously.

As she slowly approached the office door, Evelyn paused.

Eh… the heck is that sound?

She walked closer to the door, and the sounds grew louder as she did.

Whack! Whack!

Slap!

Slap!

Evelyn was beyond perplexed. What in the world was he doing in there to make that sound?

She was about to knock when the sound of her professor’s velvety voice through the door caused her to go stock still.

“I am highly disappointed in you, Miss Monroe. Who told you to come?”

Evelyn shivered at the tone of his voice, her eyes growing wide.

How…how did he know I was here? And why’s he talking like that? 

She plagued herself with so many questions that she felt herself turning silly.

’‘But… I suppose you’ve been a diligent, good girl. You may come now, Evelyn. Come for me.”

What the…I guess he wants me to come in then?

Without further confirmation, Evelyn twisted the knob to swing the door open.

“Uhm… I’m sorry for -  Holy SHIT!”

Little did she know… it wasn’t the ’come in, have some tea!’  type of come, but the sexy, kinky kind.

Evelyn all but threw the cake inside the room with a surprised yelp, shocked at the sight that now tainted her poor virgin eyes.

Her beautiful professor… whom she secretly admired… was currently balls deep within a fortunate female victim - paddle in hand as he fucked her mercilessly against the obviously sturdy surface of his mahogany desk.

                   Good? Bad? Worth pursuing? Let me know~

[veliseraptor]

the endgame reaction post

I know you’ve all been waiting for it. It’s 3:30 am right now so this may not be totally coherent and I’m almost certainly going to forget things, but here goes.

HERE BE SPOILERS. LIKE, PLENTY O SPOILERS.

I went into this movie with one main question and that was “is Marvel going to stick the landing on what they did in Infinity War?” my answer?

sort of. I...didn’t dislike it? I liked parts of it a lot. but mostly my reaction, frustratingly enough, is kind of a “shrug, with a few ‘into it’ and a handful of ‘oh no thanks.’ I cried a couple different times but overall my emotional response is very...muted. 

this could be a function of my being depressed right now, but I also think it’s because this movie...just didn’t hit the right notes, for me. it did a lot of things right, technically, and it had a lot of character moments, but it felt...I don’t know, something indefinable was missing for me. 

I’m going to try to unpack that later, but let’s break things down a little.

the good

NEBULA, oh my god, Nebula in this movie was fantastic. her moments with her younger self (I’m always going to be here for older/younger self confrontations with characters with her specific brand of issues) especially, but also...in general, I felt like this movie did very well by her. and ohhhh god “you can change” “he won’t let me” my feelings. 

i’m gay for Carol’s new hair and that’s that.

WAS THAT A FUCKING FLYING HORSE? WHERE DID VAL GET A FLYING HORSE. IS THERE A FLYING HORSE FARM IN NEW ASGARD

Thor and Frigga’s conversation. I...did not like almost anything else having to do with Thor in this movie (more on that later, and I know everyone and their mother has already written about this), but that conversation was...so lovely, and I’m glad Frigga got that after her fridging in The Dark World, and the “I was raised by witches” line obscurely delighted me.

this is the SECOND time we’ve seen Loki transforming into Steve onscreen and I’m just saying that Loki being obsessed with Steve? #confirmed

also, Loki taking advantage of chaos to bolt with the Tesseract is golden and while it is seriously unclear what happened to the timelines altered by intervention (more on this later too) I’m going to assume that this means there is at least one Loki out there having the time of his goddamn life

more on this later, but there were some great Natasha moments in this movie as far as character work, and I am still very into her “five years later” hair. also lots of good Clint and Natasha stuff like we haven’t seen since the first Avengers movie, so that was nice. (the arrow necklace!!)

while I have caveats about it, the ending they gave Steve was pretty much what I was expecting and the best I could hope for, so I think that’s a solid “good”

I have absolutely no caveats about Steve giving Sam the shield, and everything about that scene passing it on was delightful, and Steve and Peggy dancing made me cry, so there’s that. 

STEVE’S WORTHY CAUSE OF COURSE HE IS

the whole concept of a time heist is super neat.

SO WE ALL SAW THAT A-FORCE TEAM SHOT, RIGHT? THAT’S SETTING US UP FOR AN A-FORCE TEAM, RIGHT?

wanda fucking wrecking thanos yes girl

the bad

the big obvious one first: the stuff with Thor. as a whole bunch of people have explained: it’s not the weight gain, it’s how his character change after the five year jump is treated. it’s the fact that roughly 75% of the character beats for him in this movie are weighted for humor, that even the emotional moment with Frigga is undermined by the “eat a salad” line, that while he gets moments with his grief they tend to be undercut for a laugh. 

also the fact that he...doesn’t get anything back? I mean, while it’s true of Bruce to a certain extent, and obviously Natasha, Thor really doesn’t have any of his losses ameliorated. Tony gets Peter back, Steve gets his life with Peggy, and Thor...? I just...it feels like his character arc in this movie wasn’t, and I’m severely uncomfortable with how much of a fatphobic undercurrent (overcurrent?) it felt like there was in his scenes.

and while I love the idea of Queen Valkyrie, it doesn’t really feel earned, and feels like it shackles her to a role where she doesn’t really fit.

the final battle felt...tacked on. it felt like there was a feeling that “oh, we need an epic battle where there’s a whole army on both sides” and I...didn’t need that? it felt like a Lord of the Rings battle in my superhero movie and something about it felt very...mmm weird. I mean, I’m almost never one for Big Final Battles With Armies (with the major exception of the ones in Lord of the Rings) and it didn’t work for me here. 

though I did enjoy “keep away with the Infinity Gauntlet”, that was a fun game.

Gamora and Nebula should have been given the chance to face Thanos again together at the very least, and preferably strike the killing blow. The fact that that was given to Tony...annoys me. I mean, I can see why they did it - they needed him to have a big hero moment for his big hero sacrifice, and it was emotionally effective (I assume, if you weren’t me), but...that victory should have belonged more principally to those two, and I’m disappointed that it didn’t.

so I guess all that “foreshadowing” in Loki’s death scene was...nothing? that was just...what it looked like? I mean okay I’m not surprised but I am disappointed

the ugly

SOMEONE DATE THOSE CARS IN THE END SCENE WITH STEVE AND PEGGY, HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK, so, like, is that an alternate timeline? did Steve live a seriously down low undercover life with Peggy and that’s why it never came up that oh yeah, she was married to someone who looked exactly like Steve Rogers? how does this fit in with the Winter Soldier!Peggy? I DON’T UNDERSTAND.

basically this movie did the time travel stuff but didn’t really think all of the time travel stuff through as much as it needed to, imo. time travel plots are hard, and messy, and very quickly get confusing, and this was definitely one where they were doing some “don’t look too close!” prestidigitation to keep the holes from showing.

but I’m thinking about it and the holes are showing and I want to know how this works, are the Disney+ shows going to be alternate timelines? I assume because Vision’s going to be in one? and if Sam’s still Falcon then he’s probably not Cap in that one? BUT I DON’T KNOW it’s all very confusing.

Natasha...Natasha. I was spoiled for her dying, though I didn’t know the circumstances, and I...gah. I wrote in my notes on my phone “I wanted Clintasha BUT NOT LIKE THAT” and that’s...kind of how I feel about it? I honestly thought she was safe, is the thing. of all the characters I was worried about, she wasn’t one of them. but in retrospect...I really should’ve been. if they’re trying to shuffle the original six out of the line up then...but I felt like “surely they won’t kill their only original female Avenger, surely the optics of that...” but no, nope.

and while she wasn’t fridged per se it did feel like a lot of the energy of her death went toward providing five male characters with angst, which... [squints]

...and now I’m thinking more and if it’s been five years then all of Peter’s friends should have graduated high school. or were they not going to high school? was school suspended for five years because of the apocalypse? are we going to get fallout from this in Far From Home? 

I’M TELLING YOU THERE IS SO MUCH HERE THAT JUST DOESN’T MAKE SENSE maybe it will moving forward but...I really don’t get how they’re going to sustain this five year jump forward timeline...

GUESS WE’LL FIND OUT

basically I think what I’m coming out of this movie with is “end of an era and that makes me emotional, also there is some stuff here I like but mostly....eh” and honestly I think I’m okay with that being where I land. 

I said last year that I was going to hold off on my final verdict for Infinity War until I saw Endgame, because it seemed like they were, whatever they’d said, setting up a two movie arc. I thought there was some possibility that what they did in this movie might “save” Infinity War for me, or make me think it was worth it. 

part of the reason I don’t feel like I can say Marvel did really stick the landing here is because it didn’t. they stuck a landing. they had, like I said, a lot of the pieces in the right place. 

but I’m still feeling vaguely dissatisfied. 

[the-marvel-imagines-blog]

Madness | Chpt. 29

Chapter Title: “Only Forever”

Pairing: Loki x Original Female Character (Eva)

Word Count: 7,554

Warnings: Fluff, angst (what else is new?), soft Steve

Name Pronunciations: Hjalmar: “He-all-mar” | Aaldir: “All-deer” | Ephinea: “Eh-fin-ee-uh”

Summary: After Ezra’s departure, Eva is confronted by Steve with a bouquet of flowers and a letter.

A/N: Thank you all so much for being patient. My mood has lifted in recent days, and I decided that it was finally time to post an update to my favorite piece that I’ve ever worked on. It may not seem like much, but this chapter meant a lot to me. Thank you all a thousand times over for reading this; it truly means the world to me.

Tagged: @teddyboobear @alledeglyfunny @xletmetaste-yoursmilex @itsknife2meetu @mynameisyara @j-j-ehlby-writes @jillilama-blog (anyone who wants to be tagged can message me and ask. It’s not a problem at all)

After Ezra’s departure, I had time to think about what was to come. My time on Midgard was coming to an end, and I wished to leave as soon as possible. At one point, I had a nearly nonexistent desire to return to Asgard, for my role as a leader was being questioned by the Allfather. With time, though, I knew the danger that was quickly closing in on my home. No matter how badly I wished to live in peace, I couldn’t bring myself to do so while there was war raging on throughout the universe. In the silence, I made a silent promise to myself that this would be my final night on Midgard before I left the following morning. I would say no formal farewells to my companions, for if I watched the sorrow build in their eyes, my fear was that I wouldn’t be able to bring myself to leave. They knew that my return to Asgard was inevitable, but my date of departure wasn’t set in stone, or so they thought.

I thought of the life I could create with my children and Loki once the threat from Cul was eliminated. A seed of hope was planted as I imagined all that would follow this war should Loki and I live through it together. We would marry and have as many children as we desired. He would meet his daughter, and he would be there for the birth of our next child and every single one that followed. I yearned to return partly to hold him close and divulge the information that Tony had figured out in only a handful of interactions. Gods, I should’ve known better than to think that I could hide anything from that man. Even Ezra was aware of my “condition,” which made me even more fearful for the life of my unborn child. If he knew, it wasn’t too hard to believe that Cul would also know.

Just as my thoughts began taking a darker turn, my hands trembling just as violently as my knees-like leaves in the wind-there was a knock on my bedroom door. I wrung my hands, calming my nerves as I turned to face the door, “come in,” I called out, my voice quivering as my fear remained on the surface.

The door opened just wide enough for Steve to slip his massive frame into the room. The sight of him took my breath away. He looked stunning. He was dressed in an eerily similar outfit as the one he had worn on the night we met. Deep brown trousers were held up by a pair of matching suspenders with vertical gold stripes that matched the color of his hair. His white button up dress shirt was well pressed, and his brown and gold striped tie. In his hands, he held a record and a bouquet of daisies, flowers I watched him draw during the war from time to time. He would sit alone, and I would lower the veil over his eyes as I sat beside him, not wanting to bring him any ounce of confusion or fear. He drew the flowers over and over again, and I was left in awe as I watched him. I furrowed my eyebrows, but before I could ask what he was doing, he answered for me, “Tony tells me that you plan on leaving soon, so...I gotta take my chance,” he said, giving me that familiar coy smile. He was still the same man I met at the expo all those years ago. He was still the shy, innocent, marvelous young man that earned a place in my heart the moment our eyes met.

I gazed down at myself, feeling underdressed in one of the many day dresses Natasha pressured me into buying the day Tony gave her his credit card to take both Aurora and I shopping. Aurora grew out of her clothes quickly, but I could sense that her growth was coming to a gradual halt. A few too many of the clerks at the various stores we went to had commented that Aurora and I looked so much alike, causing me to wince at their words. Natasha played it off and laughed about how it was just “phenomenal genes” to keep them from assuming any further into our relationship. With Tony’s credit card, Natasha pressured me into picking out more and more clothes until I had an entire wardrobe, even though I insisted on leaving as soon as possible. She claimed that even if I left before wearing them all, I’d have them for when I returned, not willing to think any differently. Natasha had lost enough, and it would be unfair for me to ask her to willingly lose me as well. As I stared down at the dress that reached my knees, a soft green that Nat claimed made my eyes look “even more stunning than usual,” I clasped my hands in front of my waist. There was a bashfulness that I was filled with as Steve’s eyes drank me in, “I’m definitely underdressed for the occasion,” I claimed, our eyes meeting and dancing with that familiar friendliness.

He grinned, “you’re even more breathtaking than yesterday, and you’ll be even more beautiful tomorrow than you are today. You could wear a paper bag, and I’d still be the one who’s underdressed,” he joked, his eyes still sparkling the same way they did when we first met. He knew war just as I had, but it didn’t break his spirit. The man he used to be, the fighter with a youthful spirit, was still alive inside him. That same boyishness got the best of him when his eyes reconnected with mine after he seemingly studied every piece of me. He cleared his throat with a deep blush rising to his cheeks, “I got these for you,” he stammered, closing the space between us in a few graceful strides as he held out the bouquet of daisies. His eyes flickered away from mine, and I was reminded of the shy boy I met all those years ago.

I reached out for the flowers, our hands brushing against each other when I gripped the stems. I brought them up to my nose, breathing in the sweet smell of them. Admiring them, I spoke, not thinking of the impact my words would have, “you used to draw these in your notebooks at night,” I murmured, my fingers trailing delicately over the smooth white petals. Steve’s breath hitched, and there was a stunned silence that fell between us. I would have to explain that to him. I glanced up at him, “I used to sit right beside you in your isolation, and I’d watch you draw these all day. You’d draw them in vases, growing wildly, in the hands of a woman-”

He cut me off, “they were yours,” he interjected, his eyes searching mine for any ounce of disgust or shock. I knew that there was a love between the two of us that was more than just platonic, that he felt things for me that I couldn’t bring myself to feel for anyone else but Loki, and the man who stood before me was never upset with me over that. He found none of the disgust he feared, but I watched my eyes fill with surprise as his response sunk in. Steve continued, “daisies symbolize purity and innocence...love. Not a day went by that I didn’t think of you. I’d go to sleep and dream about you-the most incredible woman I’d ever met in all my life. You were more than just your outer beauty, and I knew that the moment we shook hands the night of the expo. No other woman even gave me the time of day, brushing me off like I was a pest, but you looked me in the eyes and treated me like I mattered. You were at the forefront of my mind every single day after that, and you embodied exactly what the daisies symbolized: purity, innocence, and love. I always dreamed of coming back from the war, finding you, and giving you a bouquet of daisies. You were the purest thought I had during the war, so I drew the daisies as I daydreamed of you...the girl I should’ve danced with when I had the chance. With that said, I have a chance now, so I was wondering if you would care to dance with me?” he asked with hope-filled eyes.

I smiled up at him as he waited for my answer with bated breath. He looked at me with the same anticipation as Loki did when he asked me to marry him. Both men had entertained the scenario that I would deny them of their proposition, but they both should’ve known me better, “I may step on your toes,” I murmured, recalling the words he once said to me.

Those blue eyes lit up with pure joy, “well, as long as I can step on your toes a few times, we’ll make a great pair,” he echoed the same words I used all those years ago. Stepping away from me, he walked over to the record player in the room; Tony had them littered throughout the tower, vastly preferring the sound of records over anything else. He had an old soul like his father. I placed the bouquet of daisies on the nightstand, “I heard this song the night of the expo after we parted ways, and it’s been my favorite song ever since. This record was the first thing I bought after they...defrosted me. It was my touchstone to the past where I thought I left you, and I mourned you every night after they brought me back to the world. I thought I’d never see you again, so I listened to this song and cried, thinking of how stupid I was to pass up the opportunity to dance with you.”

The music began, and he turned to look at me. We closed the space between us, but once we stood before each other, the confidence he had only seconds prior seemed to disappear as the bashful young man returned to him. He chewed on the inside of his cheek, gazing down at me behind those long lashes. I stepped closer to him, pressing my body against his and snapping him out of the trance he seemed to fall into. His right arm snaked around my waist, and he held my right hand with his left one, pressing it to his chest, covering it with his own. My left hand rested delicately against his arm, “dance with me like it’s the last time,” I pleaded, gazing up into his eyes as I lost myself in the sheer love I felt for him. My future was uncertain, and it could very well be our first, last, and only dance.

He smirked, “well, if this is the last time I’ll ever hold you, you should know that I’m never letting you go,” he murmured as we began to sway back and forth to the gentle melody. The lyrics carried a great weight for Steve, and with every new verse, his arm tightened around me. He mourned me more than once before, and he was terrified of ever having to go through that again. He rested his head against mine, and I listened intently to the gentle humming that was born deep in his chest. Midway through the song, he sung the lyrics that clearly held a deeper meaning to him than I realized, “do you think I’ll remember how you look when you smile? Only forever-that’s putting it mild,” he sang, his voice becoming thick with tears. I did the only thing that felt right in the moment, and I pulled myself even closer to him, our bodies flush against the other. I rested my head on his shoulder, breathing in the sweet smell of him. He buried his face in my hair, and we danced through the remainder of the song in complete silence as I drank in every lyric because it was his way of professing his love to me.

His hold on me tightened as our song came to an end and the next one began. The sudden lift in the tempo didn’t stop the slow swaying of our bodies. He didn’t pick up the pace, and neither did I. It was as if he wasn’t even listening to the music anymore, but instead, he listened to me the way I listened to him. I listened to the sound of him shifting his weight from side to side, his steady breathing, the slow rhythm of his heartbeat, and the sound that occurred when my fingers danced along his shirt. We lost ourselves in the moment and each other. I was brought back to a simpler time when I was in his arms, a time when Loki and I loved without boundaries and restrictions. Steve brought me back to simplicity, and I found myself able to enjoy the little moments of silence once more. I loved the noise-the constant sound of life-but there was a beauty in the silence that I had forgotten about until that moment in his strong arms. After two songs of the two of us swaying back and forth, casting wordless glances at one another, I finally spoke, “you’re missing the jacket,” I noted, remembering the one article of clothing he was wearing the night we met that he wasn’t wearing when he entered my room to ask me to dance.

He snickered, “it was a tragedy that I wore that thing in the first place,” he joked, burying his face into my hair before he kissed the top of my head.

I pulled back just enough to catch the blue eyes that warmed my very soul. He was deeper than others witnessed. They saw the tip of the iceberg, not the fullness of it that rested beneath the surface of the water. I saw through the blue eyes that were flecked with green and bits of gold, and I saw right into that remarkable soul. So many people saw the hero but failed to see the man; they failed to see that the hero was the man, that the two were interchangeable. I smiled up at him, which caused that adoring grin to tug at his own lips, “you were a very handsome young man back in the 40’s, Captain, and you’re still just as handsome. Not a single thing changed in my mind. You got taller, and you grew into the clothes, but you’re still the same hopeless romantic, honorable, selfless, spectacular man. Don’t sell yourself short. The jacket looked good on you,” I replied, stroking the back of his neck with my left hand.

“The jacket was what sold you on me, huh?” he laughed, the room brightening around us even as the night drew nearer. It was the last night, and it could potentially be the final hours I would spend with some of the people I loved so dearly. The laughter fell away, and he cleared his throat. I furrowed my eyebrows, wondering what happened to turn the moment into such a solemn one, but I couldn’t speak when I caught the tears in his eyes. My heart began to ache as he spoke, “I dressed this way because...I can’t have that night back. That was the last night of love and laughter...the last carefree night I had in my life, and I took it for granted. I took you for granted. I wanted to keep just one piece of it alive because the only other thing that stayed the same was you. We aren’t hearing the music live, and you don’t have on that stunning blue dress, and Howard isn’t jumping off of a stage to get your attention, and Loki’s not standing beside you with his pinky brushing yours every few minutes, and...Bucky-” his voice faltered as one single tear betrayed him. The second it fell, he reached up to wipe it away, but I was faster. My fingers brushed the tear from his cheek, and I cradled his face in my hand, waiting for another one to fall. His bottom lip quivered, but he pressed through to finish what he started...he always finished what he started, “Bucky isn’t looking at you like you’re the only woman in the world-like you’re the only person he’s ever even seen-even though he brought two pretty girls with him that night. Howard isn’t here, Loki isn’t here, and Bucky isn’t here, so I had to do everything in my power to trick myself into thinking that we were hurled back in time to when things were simpler, better, happier,” he explained, swallowing back his emotions.

I stopped swaying with him, and he followed suit, his body coming to a halt in my arms. My hands cupped his cheeks, our eyes melting into each others like the ocean meeting the land. Pushing myself up, I pressed a kiss to his forehead, lingering there for a long moment as the bittersweetness he felt poured into me, our two souls bleeding into one just like it had so long ago. We felt the sorrow and the joy together. He leaned into me, his right arm pulling me flush against his strong body. Pulling my lips from his forehead, I pressed my forehead to his, drinking in the way it felt to have someone hold me the way he did. Loki held me like I was his love from the beginning of time; the way he held me was familiar and filled with beautiful sentiments. Steve held me like every moment was our very first moment, like he was falling in love with me for the first time every second he held me, but I couldn’t love him the way he deserved. His nose brushed against mine, causing a sad smile to flicker across my lips.

I leaned back once more to gaze up into his eyes, “you’re right, Steve. Bucky and Howard aren’t here. Loki isn’t here. You and I, though...we are here,” I reminded him, knowing that he was still living in the past-something I did far too often. The world around us became heavier and heavier with each passing day, and there were moments in our history that were filled with the warmth of love we wished to drown ourselves in, warmth that didn’t exist in our present. Still, there was goodness in each moment, little specks of light in even the darkest night, moments of peace in the chaos, moments of joy in the misery. I continued to stroke his cheek as he leaned into my touch, “I don’t like dating myself, but...I’ve been alive for a long time-over a thousand years-and losing people, especially people you love so dearly, never gets easier. You dressed like this to bring back that night when there were three other people with us who aren’t here anymore. One of which, you may see again someday, but Howard and Bucky…” my voice broke, and I knew that I couldn’t continue down that path without breaking down into a mess of tears, “the point is that we can’t find our only happiness in the past, Steve...that’s no way to live. Neither of those men would’ve wished that on us, especially not on you,” I murmured, clearing my throat to hold back the tears that threatened to fall the moment my voice broke. In a desperate attempt to lighten the mood, one of my most endearing memories of Howard surfaced, and I let out a laugh that seemed to come from nowhere, “you know, Howard asked me to marry him that night. After Bucky left, Howard and I danced, and he asked me to leave Loki to marry him instead. He told me that he’d buy me the biggest, most beautiful ring in all of New York, and we’d have the most lavish wedding. Gods, I can remember it like it was yesterday.”

“I would’ve gone dancing just to see that!” he exclaimed before the two of us lost ourselves in a fit of giggles, remembering the man we both harbored such a great love for. Steve wasn’t around to see Howard’s downfall, but I was. Still, I had a deep love for the man. As our laughter died down, another song began, and Steve began swaying once more, pulling me back into the movements with him. We fell into a perfect rhythm with one another, continuing to snicker at Howard’s lack of subtlety when it came to his feelings for me. He was bold, but he was normally much more charismatic and smooth. With me, he was upfront about his intentions, and he was a man of spontaneity at one point in his life. Once the laughter died away completely, Steve’s voice pulled at the one loose end I didn’t want to talk about, the string that was attached to the one person I could no longer imagine a single day without. I kept hearing her, and I felt her presence day in and day out. It was making it impossible to even consider leaving without her, but I had to, “she wants to get close to you, Eva. I know you don’t want to believe it, but she does,” he spoke, his voice wavering as he brought up the subject that I so diligently fled from.

I shook my head, “I won’t let her,” I murmured, my heart aching at the very idea of letting her close enough to tear down the wall I built up between us. I worked so hard to keep her at a distance, knowing that the safest place for her was as far away from me as she could get. Then, I was swept right back into her love like I never left in the first place, which made me realize that I was still just a scared little girl, afraid to lose the people I loved. She was the most important person in my story, even if I had to make her a background character to keep her alive until the end.

“Why not?” he asked, his voice suddenly filled with conviction, “I mean, I know that this is killing you, and it’s killing her, too. She’s intrigued by you. She knows there’s something different between the two of you,” he explained, pulling away just enough to gaze down into my watery eyes. Speaking about her was almost as hard as looking at her. Knowing that I introduced a light into the universe and then abandoned her-the wish and dream I hoped for every day and night for as long as I could remember-made me sick to my stomach. I was no good for her. I abandoned her like I had been abandoned. I knew the pain of not knowing and the confusion that came with trying to figure out the solution to a puzzle that was missing too many pieces. I put my own child through that, and that made me a monster. Steve continued through the lump in his throat that formed the moment he saw the tears in my eyes, “the day we got here, she caught a glimpse of your face, and that was enough for her. That girl slept on the floor outside your room every single night because every time she tried to come in, she was given a reason not to. I caught her in here with you one day, holding your hand and just watching you as you slept, like she was sitting vigil at the bedside of her closest friend...her mother. You didn’t get to see it, but I did. I saw love in its truest form when I watched her with you. All she wants is to know where she belongs, and she’s being pulled to you by fate, just like I am. If you opened up to her and let her in, if you gave her back the knowledge of who you are-who she is-there’s nothing to be gained from this but happiness and love. You’re worthy of those things, Eva. You may not believe it, but you are.”

“You wouldn’t care for me if you knew where I came from,” I murmured, my voice low with shame as I thought of the darkness my life was born from. It was only a matter of time before I found my way back to that darkness, and I couldn’t pull the people I loved there with me, “you’d probably hate me,” I forced a laugh that was cut short when my eyes filled to the brim with tears. One lone tear broke away from the whole and streamed down my cheek, but it wasn’t quick enough because before it could make it to my chin, Steve’s delicate fingers swept it away before resuming its place covering my hand that rested on his chest.

“I don’t think I would,” he argued, shaking his head as he dismissed the very idea that he could ever bring himself to hate me. I didn’t know why it seemed so unfathomable to him, though. I hated myself since before I could even remember, hated the very essence of who I was because how could I love myself when the people who were meant to love me couldn’t even bring themselves to do that? I hated myself even after I learned that my mother’s decision to give me up wasn’t born of disdain but for a fear of what would come of my future if I was close to her. I hated myself because even after finding out where I came from, what I was meant to be, I realized that I was the embodiment of every childhood fear I ever had. Unlike Hjalmar, I wasn’t afraid of the dark as a child, and that always confused my father; however, it made sense to me when I discovered who I was. I wasn’t afraid of the darkness because I was the darkness-I was born in it, lived it, felt it. I was afraid of death, and I became the embodiment of that, the offspring of death and destruction. That was my beginning, and I used that knowledge to fuel my self-loathe. Steve couldn’t see it, though. He loved with no logic or reason...and I saw it written all over his face that day. I heard it in his words, “we don’t have the liberty of choosing our beginnings.”

Smiling at the purity of his words, I shook my head, dismissing them the same way he dismissed my insistence that he would hate me. He would understand someday, and if he didn’t understand, I would make him understand, “Odin doesn’t see it that way. I’m a threat to the whole of Asgard. He knows who my parents are, and he never had any great love for Loki. Odin treated me like I was a castaway in Asgard all my life until I made a name for myself and pledged to fight for the throne. The first time I received any acknowledgement as an Asgardian was when I promised him my blood and life. I wanted to prove myself, but Odin continued to harbor resentment toward me, a resentment I never understood until recently,” I noted, my voice falling low once more as the image of her flashed before my eyes. It seemed like only yesterday, she was this tiny infant in my arms, a little life that I brought into the world with eyes that matched mine and hair that was identical to her father’s. She was perfect. She was everything I always dreamed I could be and more. She was my dream-the dawn of my new life. My bottom lip quivered, “Aurora is the product of two of the beings Odin fears the most. She was born of my blood, which is the same blood that runs through the veins of one of the most powerful and dangerous Asgardian Gods in history and Death herself. All this time I thought that I could somehow make our realm safer for her by rehabilitating Loki, but...I am the reason why she’ll never be safe.”

Steve didn’t even bat an eyelash at the revelation that I was the daughter of Death, that the very entity that embodied darkness and mortality was the very being that brought me into existence. There wasn’t even a fleeting look of fear in his eyes. He was the first person I told, the first of my loved ones who I trusted with my parentage, and he didn’t even pay it any mind. It was the same reaction he would’ve had if I told him that my favorite color was blue. All he did was smile down at me, determination clear in those crystal eyes, “then come back,” he insisted, his voice filled with hope that I would agree to the idea that he was about to lay out for me, “I have some free space in the apartment, and you can stay as long as you want. You told me that you managed to free Loki once already, so do it again and bring him here. He may have a difficult time getting people to warm up to him after...everything that happened, but we all just want to see you happy. I know him from before. I know the man he used to be, and if you say that he’s returned to that person-if you say that he’s even half the man he once was-I’d be glad to call him a friend again. You’re the glue that holds this team together, Eva. There’s so much love here for you, and there’s more than enough to spread that to Loki, too.”

Tears of joy streamed down my cheeks as I felt the warmth of Steve’s loyalty to me. It was the kind of warmth that pierced right through the surface of my skin and spread the comfort right into my bones. He brushed away the tears as I smiled up at him. The mere idea that I could piece my family back together-the idea that so many people were willing to help me accomplish that-was overwhelming. It dawned on me that it was the perfect moment to tell Steve. The tears dried, and I tried to fight back a grin, “you say that there’s more than enough love to spread to Loki, but...what about someone else?” I asked, hinting to the secret that only Tony knew about. The process was happening just as fast as before, and it wouldn’t be long until my secret was visible.

“Absolutely!” he exclaimed, his eyes bright with excitement, “Tony told us about Harley and Kaia when he was giving his full recollection of what happened. They’re more than welcome to come with you if you decide to come and stay with me. They belong wherever you are. Aurora has her own room right now, but she’d have no problem sharing her space. She barely even sleeps in there anyway. I usually find her on the floor by one of the windows in the middle of the night,” he added as the small piece of information hit my heart like a train. I had my theories as to why she did that, but I needed to hear it from her.

Not wanting to give Steve another reason to worry about me, I proceeded, a glimmer of excitement amongst the overwhelming fear, “no...I mean...what about one more?”

“Your father?” he asked, still not getting the hint. I felt like I’d have to all but shout it at him for him to realize what I was insinuating, but before I could hint at it again, he continued, a fond smile on his face at the thought of my father, “Aaldir was here for as long as he could before he had to go back to Asgard, but he and I got along really well, actually. Tony might have the most amount of space, but I can make a good argument as to why you should stay with me. My apartment might be a tight fit, especially with three Asgardians, two children, and myself, but the more the merrier. Your father is more than welcome to come along. I sleep on the couch most nights anyway.” I laughed at his obliviousness and silently hoped that he would never change. The world was unkind to him all his life, but he maintained that boyish innocence through it all. “I’m glad to make any renovations you’d need, too. I’m handy with tools,” he added, hoping it would sway me in the right direction. The man was willing to do absolutely anything for me.

I let out a long breath, one I didn’t know I had been holding until my chest fell. The weight slipped from my shoulders the moment our eyes met, “what about a nursery?”

His eyes brightened with life, and he pulled away even more as those twinkling blue eyes flickered between me and my loosely covered abdomen. The purest smile plastered itself on his face, “wait...you...are you pregnant?” he asked, struggling to find the right words, unsure of how he should ask.

His pure joy at the mere idea that I was with child caused my heart to swell with love. Too emotional to speak, I simply nodded my head, biting my bottom lip to suppress the smile. The fear of the future bled away as Steve’s excitement took hold of me. He threw his arms around my waist. The warmth of his life essence encircled mine and surrounded it with the love and care I was in desperate need of. No matter how much bloodshed I had caused or how much I had seen-no matter how many battlefields I stood upon-there were times when I needed someone to hold me and times when I needed to feel protected. As I buried my face into his shoulder, my grin became even wider, “all I know is that the situation in Asgard needs to be resolved before this child is born, and then I’ll be free to commit treason and bring Loki here. Then, I can finally have my family the way I always dreamed of: together.”

I felt the sudden change within him, which caused me to pull away just enough to see that the joyous smile was evicted from its home on his lips, and it was replaced by a tight frown. The idea of me riding into a war that could potentially claim my life was upsetting for him, and I knew because the tables turned between us, “if you need help, you always know that this...strange and dysfunctional family is here for you. We would bleed for you, Eva. Never forget that.”

The mere thought of them taking on Cul and Ezra caused a wave of fear to crash into me, nearly causing my knees to buckle. A chill rolled through me. I knew that they would fight and bleed for me, that they would die for me, but I wouldn’t let them. I refused to risk the lives of my people even if it was for the greater good, “Cul and Ezra are my problems, and-”

He cut me off, his voice strong and stern, “and you’re ours! You came down to Earth during some of our greatest times of need, and you risked your life to protect us. We’re willing to do the same for you. I’m willing to be thrown into space if it means I can help keep two-three-” he gestured down to my abdomen, “-of my favorite people safe and reunite my other favorite person with her family,” he added, smiling at the mere mention of Aurora.

“You’re so good, Steve Rogers-far too good for this world and all you’ve been through,” I noted, resting my head back onto his shoulder as our swaying picked back up again.

“I could say the same about you,” he smiled, his heart rate slowing back down as he pushed the idea of the future away from us, trying desperately to focus on the present. Every so often, his heart would speed up and skip a beat, and I wondered if it was because he caught himself thinking about the future and all the unknowns that came with it. After a few long moments of silence between us, he laughed, “I guess we're both a bit lucky that our dance took this long to come about. My clothes fit much better, and I’m a little less clumsy.”

I smirked, gazing up into his eyes, “but you’re still the same man you were all those years ago, and I wouldn’t change that for the world.”

“I haven’t changed much, but I can finally manage myself around you, which is probably the biggest change aside from the fact that I’m taller than you now,” he teased me, taking pride in the handful of inches that he stood above me.

“You seemed to do well back then,” I noted as the fingers of my left hand began stroking the back of his neck. Occasionally, they would rake through his soft golden locks, but his hair wasn’t long enough for my fingers to lose themselves-not the same way they did in Loki’s wild raven hair. For a moment, I wondered what Steve would look like with the long hair that so many Asgardian men donned, and the thought of it made my cheeks flush with color.

Even though he couldn’t possibly know what I was thinking, I watched as blood rushed to Steve’s cheeks the same way it did to mine. He fought back a coy smile, trying to hide his blush, but I had already seen it. Knowing that I wouldn’t call attention to it, he cleared his throat and proceeded with the conversation, “you clearly don’t remember it the same way I do. I would’ve stepped on your toes over and over again because I would’ve been hopelessly lost with a woman like you in my arms. I’m still just as lost, but I can mind my feet a little better,” he grinned, clearly not giving himself enough credit. The moment I opened my mouth to argue against his claim, he continued, his face becoming solemn, “I still have the biggest crush on you. I’m not afraid to say it. I’m still madly, hopelessly, irrevocably in love with you, and that will never change. I sit up most nights, and I tell myself that in another life-in another alternate reality-maybe there’s a version of me who is living his happily ever after with you as his wife. He’s the one who got the happy ending with a dog and a handful of kids with you. He had the courage to dance with you that night in 1943, and you fell just as hopelessly in love with him as he was with you. I tell myself that he’s in his own reality, happier than ever because he can grow old beside the woman of his dreams, but this version of me...I’m happy because you’re on your way to being happy, and that is all that matters to me. I know I can’t have you, but you’re the love of my life, Eva, and that’s just how the story goes.”

Our swaying came to another abrupt halt as his words began to sink in. I wasn’t taken aback by any of them, but what I was taken aback by was his willingness to tell me with so much confidence. He was still the shy man that he used to be, but he spoke his truth with conviction. As I turned his words over and over again in my mind, he took the opportunity to keep speaking, “I have something for you,” he murmured, reaching into his pants pocket. He didn’t give me much time to process what he said previously before he changed the subject, but I knew that I would have plenty of time to think about it later in the night. From his pocket, he pulled out a folded piece of paper. He gazed down at it, clearing away the lump in his throat before he spoke, “Bucky...” he stopped, the mere mention of his late friend bringing about a sadness that left me feeling the hole in my chest once more. The one I couldn’t save. The soldier. Bucky. He pressed on, tears forming in his crystal blue eyes, “he left me two separate letters the day he was shipped out. One was for me, filled with some sentimental words and some words about you. The other...well, he asked that the other be given to you if I ever saw you again. He didn’t care if it was a year down the line or even if it was after he...was gone. I think he knew in his heart that we would find each other again, so...I kept it on me ever since. It’s time that I gave it to its rightful owner.”

He held his hand out. The fragile, worn piece of paper looked like it had been through it all, which it had. Steve kept it on his person, and it showed. In Steve’s hand rested the final words I would have from Bucky. They wouldn’t be the ones filled with fear and sorrow that I heard when I held him in the snow. The words in the snow were fearful, but they quickly bled into ones of amazement and love. He kept claiming that he knew it would be me that he would see in his last moments, that he was right. I didn’t want him to be right. I didn’t want there to be a final moment for him. As I stared down at the letter, I was left in disbelief. He thought of me right before he left. He made sure to write a letter for his best friend and for a girl he only met once, a girl he danced with for a handful of songs, a girl he held for only a fraction of his life. He thought of me enough to write me a letter, almost like he knew that he didn’t want to leave me with the words in the snow with blood all around us. I was unable to speak. I was rendered completely and utterly speechless as I stared down at the folded note. I couldn’t even move it to take it from Steve’s hand.

Sensing my inability to even move, Steve brushed past me and placed the note on my nightstand. I watched him, my eyes wide as I continued to process everything that was happening. All the while, I was also busy trying to shove my last memories of Bucky back into the box that made that loss more manageable, “I know you plan on leaving tomorrow,” Steve blurted out, his back facing me as he positioned the note just so on the nightstand. When he turned to face me, I saw the fear of the unknown in his eyes, but I was just as fearful that someone else knew. How could he know? I didn’t tell anyone or even write it down for anyone to find. Perhaps he could simply feel it, “I know that there’s nothing I can do to stop you, but...you need to come back. I’m telling you that I need you to come back because I’m not finished. I will never be finished. There may be a few chapters of my life without you, but I won’t settle for a story that ends without you still by my side as my best friend, the love of my life, and the woman who would’ve let me step on her toes. I can’t kiss you the way I want to or love you the way I want to or marry you, so...please don’t make me live my life without you, too, Eva. I can’t do that. Don’t ask me to do that,” he begged before a rapid knocking on the door pulled our attention.

Steve called out the invitation to enter the room as I still hadn’t recovered from any of what just happened, but he seemed to be doing fine. I suddenly took notice of everything. Every single one of my senses felt like it was on overdrive. I heard the light squeak of the doorknob as it turned and the way the air caught the door as it opened just enough for Natasha to poke her head into the room. I heard the way she shifted on her feet, and I smelled the sweetness of her delicate perfume from all the way across the room. I was hyper-aware of everything around me. Natasha smiled, adding light to the room that seemed to darken in my sadness. My heart-like Steve’s-skipped a beat as I was brought back to the present, “when you two fossils are done with your love-fest in here, we have a movie night to tend to. The cookies are finally perfected, thanks to yours truly, so I’d better not be the only one eating them!”

[minaminokyoko]

Spider-Man: Far from Home--A Spoilertastic Review

Oh, my baby boy is back and it feels good.

Like many of you, I was looking forward to FFH due to the trauma left behind by our final film with all the Avengers present, and I needed to see my sweet Spider Son to try to dry my tears. I'm happy to say Far from Home is just the popcorn flick we need this summer: light, enjoyable, fun. I do admit to a bias right off the bat, before I begin the review: I am one of the hugest fans of the Iron Dad and Spider Son dynamic, and so I knew by default that I wasn't going to like this movie as much as the first one. Sorry. I am a skank for adopted family tropes, and I think Iron Dad and Spider Son was one of the strongest relationships developed in the MCU period. Losing Tony is just...agonizing. I've sectioned it off in my brain as Did Not Happen just to get by, honestly, and so keep that in mind as we proceed.

Spoilers ahead.

Overall Grade: B

Pros:

-Lemme get this out of the way: MY SONNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN MY SPIDER SON OH MY GOSH PETER PARKER IS SUCH A GOOD BOI AND A SWEET SMOL BEAN AND I HAVE NO MATERNAL INSTINCTS EXCEPT WHEN IT COMES TO MCU PETER PARKER AND I LOVE THIS CHILD MORE THAN ANYTHING AND I JUST WANT TO PROTECT HIM AND HUG HIM AND BRUSH HIS HAIR AND COOK HIM DINNER I LOVE MY LITTLE BOY Y'ALL.

-Ahem. Tom Holland still shines in this role. I really, solidly care about Peter Parker. He's a great kid and he's very realistic in the way that he's written and acted. He's just a shy, awkward little nerd with a heart of gold who unfortunately has been forced into the worst situations that he's not ready for. I wanted to punch "Nick" in the face for how much goddamn pressure he put on a kid who is literally still in the goddamn mourning process just like everyone else. Peter has so much to deal with and he's only had these powers for a short amount of time, so it's natural that he's so frustrated and anxious and he wants time to go after things that are important to him. I found that very understandable and sympathetic, even if the "I just want to be normal" trope has been done to death in superhero media. MCU Peter has so much heart and I'm proud of this baby for what he's able to accomplish.

-The allusions to Tony and the void left behind hit home quite hard. Especially that fucking gravestone part of the Mysterio sequence. That was just...cruel. Tony taught Peter so much, and he genuinely loved that kid. He grew to love him and trust him and worry about him, and it's so awful that Tony won't get to see him grow up to be his own man. I'm grateful for the time they had together, and I really love Tony leaving Peter the glasses and the A.I., knowing that while he might still make a mistake, he would do the right thing in the end. (Side note: EDITH is as funny as it is fucked up, "Even Dead, I'm the Hero." God fucking damn you, Tony, that is so in-character and it hurts my soul.) "Nick" shoving all that pressure onto Peter made me want to kick his ass, especially since he talks down to him and tries to blame him for not being ready when he only just got into the game relatively speaking. But I also loved the sequence of him in the plane doing exactly what Tony used to do in his lab. It's such a great parallel, showing that Peter is his own person but he's also a chip off the old block, and that is very sweet to see. (I also squealed at the Led Zeppelin comment, oh my son, such a cutie.)

-I was extremely hesitant about them choosing Gyllenhaal for the role of Mysterio (not because of his skill as an actor, just because he looks like a giant puppy, sorry) but now I see why. He's an unstable narcissist and it fits him. What a jerkoff. I was furious with how callous he was and how he shifted blame everywhere like it's just SO necessary to kill all these people for fame, fortune, and money. Ugh, what a shitbird. So kudos to him. I didn't think he could pull it off, but he sure as hell did.

-The effects were fantastic. I really do think the illusion sequence will go down in MCU history as one of the most visually creative, disorienting, heartbreaking things we've seen so far in the saga. It was harrowing, especially the Iron Man suit crawling out of the grave. What a kick in the fucking nuts for Peter, and for us.

-Peter and MJ, while it did get a little overwhelming, were cute as shit. And I'm glad that the modern films are removing the stigma of the "I can't let my family and friends know I'm the hero" thing. It was definitely heavily done in the 80's, 90's, and early to mid 2000's and I'm fine to see it being phased out at least in terms of the MCU. It's a little more realistic that most of your family or friends would be able to handle your secret, and not only that, help you out on occasion. I'm glad she knows and their kisses were freaking adorable. Sweet babies.

-That. First. End. Credits. Scene. What a fucking killer. First off, God bless whoever at Marvel Studios listened to the thousands of fans begging them to cast J. K. Simmons as J. Jonah Jameson again, continuity be damned. The man IS the embodiment of the character, and I absolutely fucking ADORE that they gave us the nod and the wink we all wanted even back when Spidey was Andrew Garfield. Thank you, thank you, thank you. Next, oh my God, my sweet baby boy, my smol bean, got called out and branded as a murderer. Fuck, this is gonna be a serious problem, and considering the fact that we don't have the next MCU film lined up yet (at the time this was posted, and mind you, San Diego Comic Con is in two weeks, so maybe they'll clarify) the consequences could definitely be crazy. Poor Peter. He's gonna have a lot of work to do in order to undo this mess and prove that he's not Spidey, but this could also mean they're adapting some part of the Civil War story, maybe. We'll see, but that was a big ass bomb to drop.

-The Skrulls second credit scene was a genuine surprise, and it made sense. I thought Nick felt a little off the whole movie, and that really does explain why--it's someone else doing an impression of him and trying their best. Nick would've been smart enough to know probably right off the bat that Beck wasn't who he said he was. His story was way too noble and convenient. Nick would've probably have run facial recognition and then it would ping for a former Stark Industries employee, and that would've been a wrap. I like that it being a Skrull justifies what would be a plothole. Neat idea.

-I appreciated the Spidey's eye view of the action. Those were some cool shots and they were centered well, so you didn't feel nauseous or anything. It kept you in the action and was very engrossing and cool.

Cons:

-The bystander syndrome that everyone got this time around is a little irksome. It's the same reason that while I really, really love Guardians of the Galaxy Vol 2, I default don't like it as much as the first one since everyone got put into the bystander spot except for basically Peter in the very end. While it was nice to have them defend themselves, I'd have liked it more of MJ and Ned and the others figured their own way out of escaping the drones. Why? Because it would show Peter that it's not always on just his shoulders. His friends are competent and they can help, and I think that would've been a better way to go rather than him doing it himself.

-Some of the humor was flat. JB Smooth and the other teacher are the worst offenders, I'd say. They were given too much screentime and they're not that funny.

-The May and Happy subplot goes almost nowhere and isn't fully explored, and I kind of would've been fine if it hadn't been in the movie at all. It doesn't add much.

-The ending was kind of unclear? Did Beck actually get shot and die from his wounds? If so, then what was the official story about the drones and his body and whatnot? It's all pretty damn vague. If Beck is dead, that's disappointing. I kinda wish Marvel would stop killing the villains at the end of almost all the films. Longest running recurring villains are Loki and Thanos, I think. Vulture lived, and I'd like him to return in the future if possible. You can use actors more than once, Marvel, they're not tissue paper.

-Nitpick: It did almost feel like we missed a movie where Peter likes MJ. She was more a cameo in the first one than a full lead, so it almost felt like there's a short film somewhere of them getting closer and him getting over Liz and liking MJ instead.

-Nitpick: Same with the whole "other guy also likes MJ" subplot. Eh, I could leave it out and not miss it.

-Nitpick: I still can't with how they expect anyone to buy that Night Monkey story. I mean, it's black suited Spidey no matter which way you look at it. And yes, people should immediately notice he's at the very least one of the students at Peter's high school, and then it can't be too hard after that. I mean, Peter doesn't even change his voice while he's in the suit.

-Nitpick: I was kind of hoping for more clues or reactions to half of everyone, you know, being fucking murdered by Thanos for five years and returning to their lives. But I guess that was just pushed aside because it could become a whole rabbit hole issue. Still, though, I was hoping someone would tell us if the Snapped just don't remember being dead or if there is some kind of afterlife they experienced. (Side note: wow, holy shit, the teacher's mini story about it was dark and awful but I did laugh out of shock. I mean, damn. Low blow, wifey. Low fucking blow.)

-They mention spidey sense but I'd have liked it if they explicitly explain why he has it sometimes but other times he doesn't? It seems to fluctuate, but why and how? Is it more like anxiety or an extra sense? Is it based on his emotional health? I want clarification.

All in all, I had a good time and I'd put this in the middlegrade MCU films. I still really enjoy Holland in the role and I want nothing but good things for him and this franchise.

[imagine-loki]

Wedded Bliss

TITLE: Wedded Bliss CHAPTER NO./ONE SHOT: Chapter 33 AUTHOR: MaliceManaged ORIGINAL IMAGINE: Imagine Odin determined to find Loki a wife in a misguided, though somewhat well-intentioned attempt to ‘mellow him’. … RATING: T ______________________

“Loki; what’d you do to Agent Hawthorne?” Edith asked as she walked into the common room after a post-mission shower.

“Do?” he asked back without looking up from his cards.

No one was entirely sure what had possessed Clint to challenge Loki to a game of poker, but it was clear he now regretted it after losing ten times in a row once Loki had gotten the hang of the rules, a rather substantial amount of M&M’s before him.

“Yeah, ‘do’. He was really nervous around me, like he couldn’t get away from me fast enough. What did you do?”

“Pshh; Hawthorne’s always been kinda squirrely, Edie,” Clint chimed in, “Now shush; I’m gonna win this time.”

Loki smirked. “Think so?”

“Oh, yeah; I got you this time, Your Royal Pain in the Ass.”

Edith snorted inelegantly before simply bursting out laughing, earning a glare from the prince and a laugh from the archer. She was still laughing as she nudged Loki’s arm out of the way so she could sit on his lap, throwing an arm around his shoulders and kissing his temple, earning a bemused look she giggled at.

“Seriously, what did you do to Jonah?”

“‘Jonah’, now, is it?” he asked with a raised eyebrow.

“I mean, I’ve only known the guy for, like, three years,” she replied then groaned, “Oh, don’t tell me you’re going to be the jealous type. I don’t have the energy for that.”

“I am not jealous; that would imply I thought he stood a chance,” he replied simply, turning back to his cards, “If you must know, I simply made it clear that you are unavailable.”

“Uh-huh. And how did you go about that, exactly?” He simply smirked slightly, causing her to sigh. “Why did it even matter, anyway? I told you, there was nothing there.”

“Nah, there kinda was, though,” Clint chimed in again before cursing as Loki revealed his cards, as he’d lost yet again. “Guy’s had a crush on you for years.”

“What, really?”

“Yeah, really.”

“… Huh.”

“Do I wanna know what you did to the poor kid?” Clint asked Loki amusedly.

“Nothing harmful,” Loki grinned, causing Clint to chuckle and shake his head as he pushed Loki’s winnings towards him.

“Are you guys… betting M&M’s?”

“Hey, when you’ve been a spy for as long as I have, you learn never to bet money at poker.”

“Which by the look of things is the only reason you’re not broke right now,” Edith snickered.

“At least we’re not playing strip poker,” Clint shrugged.

“Oh, my god, Clint, whyyy!?”

“Because you said it like that.”

“If I am understanding correctly, that would rather put you at even more of a disadvantage,” Loki said with a chuckle, glancing down at his outfit then back at Clint in his t-shirt and sweatpants, causing Clint to burst out laughing.

They played another three hands before Clint finally admitted defeat, stalking away grumbling something about Natasha and Holland while Loki tried to keep the gloating to a minimum. He had barely left before Edith helped herself to some of Loki’s winnings, earning a glare she merely smiled at.

“Are you going to tell me what’s on your mind any time soon?” she asked after a while.

“You’ll have to be more specific, Edie; there is always something on my mind.”

“You’ve been a little weird since those guys that attacked last week.”

“Oh, that. I am simply wondering what has come of it, if anything,” he dismissed, “I would have thought father would send word by now.”

“Maybe they’re still working on it?”

“That is the likelier reason.”

“It could be nothing. I mean, if they had to hire outside help to attack you, maybe they don’t have the resources or numbers to go up against Asgard.”

Loki simply hummed in response.

****

The Firebird’s signature whistle filled the mostly empty building, echoes bouncing the sound within the walls, causing her prey to grow even more nervous as she looked around for the source, the canister of stolen chemicals held close to her chest.

“You think your mind games will work on me, brat?” she called out, fighting to keep her voice level, “I know how you fight; you can’t do anything to me, not unless you want to blow us both up!” She backed into something solid and froze.

“That is true enough,” Loki whispered into her ear, “I, on the other hand…”

To her credit, the woman actually tried to turn and fight back, but as soon as she did Loki placed a hand of her forehead and knocked her out with his seidr, catching the canister as she fell. Edith then walked out of the corner she’d been hiding in and called it in.

“That was almost underwhelmingly easy,” she commented, earning a chuckle.

“I’m quite certain the score of men guarding this building would disagree with you there, dýrr minn.”

“Eh, they don’t count.”

“Naturally.”

They had barely boarded the quinjet when they received word they were needed elsewhere, prompting an annoyed groan from Edith, who’d hoped to be back home in time for dinner. Loki for his part simply sent the canister in his hands ahead to its intended destination with his seidr, unknowingly startling several people with its sudden appearance. They settled into their seats and let their pilot fly them to where they had to go.

After a while, Edith felt eyes on her and glanced up from her phone to find Loki staring at her rather intently. “What?”

Loki blinked at being caught and looked away. “Nothing.”

“Uh-huh,” she said wholly unconvinced.

“It’s unimportant,” he insisted, conjuring a book he’d… borrowed from Edith’s room and continuing where he’d left off that morning.

Edith looked at him a while longer then rolled her eyes and turned back to her phone. The rest of the flight was made in silence, though that changed as soon as they arrived to the intersection they’d been called to, where an all out firefight was raging. What made their presence, and indeed Steve and Tony’s, necessary was the use of guns Edith was pretty sure she’d seen in one of SHIELD’s development labs. How the enemy had gotten a hold of them, she couldn’t begin to guess.

“This is as close as I can get!” the pilot called back, having had to bank sharply to avoid taking fire.

“Close enough,” Loki dismissed, opening the ramp and gesturing at Edith to grab hold of him.

Edith wasted no time jumping onto Loki’s back, who then leapt out of the jet, using a quick burst of seidr to cushion their landing for her sake. The SHIELD agents seemed relieved for the extra help, and between all of them they finally turned the tide firmly in their favour; something the enemy soon realised, causing them to try to retreat. One or two managed to get away but the rest were apprehended.

On the flight back, Edith noticed Loki staring at her again but chose to ignore it, knowing he likely wouldn’t say anything in front of Steve and Tony. He seemed to like them well enough, but not enough to share his thoughts the way he did with her. Instead she simply leaned against him as she tried and failed to stifle a yawn, causing the others to chuckled softly.

“Long day, kid?” Tony teased.

“Oh, shut up,” Edith grumbled, earning laughs.

****

“Why don’t you like my new uniform?” Edith blurted as Loki walked away to the elevator after bidding her goodnight, tired of waiting for him to bring it up on his own.

Loki turned to give her an incredulous look at the random subject but she merely crossed her arms at her chest and looked at him expectantly. “I never said I didn’t like it.”

“Not in those words, sure, but as good as. So what’s so wrong with it?”

“I simply like your old one better, that is all.”

“Why?”

“Does there have to be a reason, Edith? I just do. Honestly, it hardly even matters; I am not fool enough to think I can dictate what you wear even if I wanted to.”

“It matters because I actually care about your opinion, even if I intend to keep wearing it. Everyone else likes it; I just want to know why you don’t.”

He closed his eyes and sighed before walking back to stand in front of her; reaching up, he ran a finger under the cord of his pendant until he reached it then picked it up. “This. It is because of this,” he confessed, looking up to meet her eyes, “The old one left this visible; I liked that. Silly, I know, but still…”

“… That is indeed very silly,” she finally said, causing him to laugh softly. She reached up and cupped his face in her hands. “It’s still there even if you can’t see it. I mean, it’s not like I have choice.”

“I know; that is why I didn’t want to say it out loud.”

“I dunno, it’s actually kind of adorable, really,” she teased.

“If you tell anyone, so help me, Edith…”

She burst out laughing. “Nah, I won’t tell,” she smirked, “I’ll save it for a rainy day.”

He narrowed his eyes at her. “You are not the only one who has blackmail material, you know.”

“You got nothing the guys don’t already know,” she scoffed.

“But I have plenty Thor and the others don’t,” he reminded, “And seeing as we will see them next week…”

“… Shit.”

[lightandwinged]

Endgame happened!

Spoiler free: easily the best superhero movie I’ve ever seen, mindblowing in the best possible way, I cried like a little baby so much, and while it wasn’t perfect, I still think that it hit all the right beats and hit them correctly in a way that should genuinely make the DCU sit down and think about how it will never be this good.

(spoilers beneath the cut!)

WHEW LADS

I spoiled myself for this movie, so I knew basically everything that was coming and every beat the movie would hit, and I did that because I like to know how many tissues I’m going to need by the end of the night (the answer was that I haven’t needed that many since Return of the King, holy shit). I’d also seen a lot of the early criticism, and while I agree with some of it (I’ll get to it), the rest was eh to me. 

The only thing I did NOT like was Thor’s arc, which it seemed like straddled the line between funny and sad a little too much. Like, it was genuinely sad because you could tell that this was his manifestation of PTSD: letting himself go completely, hiding away from the world, drinking beer and playing video games all day. I felt like it was less that it was played for laughs and more that people just thought it was funny because it was just too sad to accept. And Thor in-universe wanted people to think it was funny because accepting that it wasn’t hurt too much. At the same time, I don’t know how they could’ve done the arc better with the time they had. The movie was already bursting at the seams at 3 hours long, and there was so much happening. I REALLY HOPE that the way the film hinted at Thor joining up with the Guardians of the Galaxy isn’t just a red herring, because I will absolutely buy a thousand tickets to see that on opening night. And if he is in Guardians 3 (side note: I wonder if that’s why GotG3 suddenly spiked as people’s most anticipated upcoming MCU film?), I feel like that will allow him a little more room to react to Things.

Tony’s entire arc was perfect, beyond perfect. It blew me away, and I genuinely feel like RDJ should be nominated for an Oscar for it, if nothing else than for the sheer scope of the performance. It was absolutely heartbreaking, but it was also done so well--Tony’s entire story has been this kind of fear of death in one way or another, so in the end, having him accept his own death to save the universe was fantastic. And I knew he was going to die, even without reading spoilers (RDJ’s contract is up, after all), but it still hit me so hard when he did. 

Steve’s arc felt really good, too, though I know a lot of people have had problems with it. It felt earned, and it felt deserved, and I was perfectly fine with hand waving all the possible issues his ending caused because he looked like Fred Rogers at the end. His entire story has always been a reverse of Tony’s: he’s never feared death and has always had a willingness to die, but he wanted something that his conscience never allowed him to have (that being a normal, peaceful life). Him finally allowing himself that peace felt right. 

(and he 100% cleared it with Bucky beforehand, every single aspect of it, from “but wouldn’t going back to have that dance with Peggy break time?” to “but you’re being tortured while I’m dancing???” and I guarantee Bucky was like “bitch, if you don’t do this, I am going to dust you”)

Looking at the Nat thing, that felt inevitable, and it was the first thing that made me cry. It also felt like a huge culmination of her arc. Her entire story through these movies has been to try and wipe away the red in her ledger, and I doubt that anything she ever did would’ve been enough in her mind. Like looking through the writing of the story, she did feel like the best option for the soul stone, and her death hit me WAY harder than Gamora’s, because on Gamora’s part, you understood that Thanos’ love for her wasn’t the kind of love that would’ve fought to be the one to sacrifice himself for her. Clint loves Natasha, as much as she loves him, and to see him lose her so soon after losing his family (well. Film-wise, at least) was wrenching. And Jeremy Renner was AMAZING in this. He looked so haunted. Good job, dude.

I still really like Thanos as a villain, because he remains one of the few movie villains who’s actually read the Evil Overlord Checklist, so victory against him isn’t because he fucked up somewhere along the way (he knows that turning into a snake never helps) but because it was a contest of wills, and the heroes’ will was stronger than his. That makes their victory feel properly earned, and not narratively forced. 

Odds and ends: 

Steve wielding Mjolnir made our entire audience scream and clap so very loud, and I’m glad one of the view good bits in AoU paid off in a major way.

Thor getting lightning powers will always be very sexy to me. 

That final battle was legit the best I’ve ever seen, including Helm’s Deep and Pelennor. The sight of everyone coming out of the magic yellow portals looked exactly like a comic book spread, and I really hope Stan Lee got to see a cut of it before he died. 

I appreciated the moment of Carol being escorted through the battlefield by the (admittedly, depressingly small) entire cast of women who’ve played a major role in these movies and were still alive (including the Wasp, who was my favorite because she spent the entire battle like “???? what the fuck is even happening? I guess I’m here now?”). 

All of the five years post snap scenes were haunting, in that “life after people” kind of way. I LOVED Scott wandering through the neighborhood that’s all overgrown and a mess, with no idea what’s happened or what any of it means. 

I also loved that all the time shenanigans basically set up “here is how we’re dealing with there being 72 different versions of these characters in the comic books, also here is why Loki, Scarlet Witch, and Vision are able to have their own series, even though 2/3 of that sentence is dead.”

Really, I’m just a slut for time travel shenanigans. 

And Thor and Captain Marvel. Brie Larson looks SO good with short hair. Help.

I just also loved that even though they planned their time travel adventures down to the second, they still managed to fuck it up royally because, at the end of the day, these guys are just a bunch of a-holes. 

Anyway. I am emotionally compromised. This movie felt like a real finale, and it was a good finale. It gave me the same vibes that Return of the King gave me back in 2003, where it wasn’t 100% perfect (me, to this day: BETTER TRANSITIONS BETWEEN YOUR SEVEN ENDINGS, PETER JACKSON), but it still hit all the beats I wanted it to hit and served as a nice ribbon to tie up the series. A solid A of a film, five stars, I need to see it again but this time with more hydration so I don’t have a crying headache afterwards.

[callunavulgari]

TOP 25 FICS OF 2018

1. A Cornstalk Fiddle by @notbecauseofvictories | Devil Went Down To Georgia | The Devil/Johnny | 17k

Where Johnny goes, the Devil follows; where Johnny goes, the Devil is already there.

Heather Says: So. I never thought that my favorite fic of the entire year would be a fic written about a song - and one that I don’t even particularly like - but here I am. I read this fic the same night that I finally broke down and watched Moonlight, and ended up listening to Moonlight’s End Credits and Hello Stranger by Barbara Lewis on repeat while I finished that first chapter on my back porch. This is that perfectly atmospheric fic that you’ll find maybe once every ten years and could probably sustain you on its memory for just as long.

2. Work of All Saints by @kaikamahine | Coco | Imelda/Hector/Ernesto | 210k

Imelda Rivera (b. 1899 - d. 1969), a story that includes but is not limited to: the finest music school this side of the Santo Domingo, three traveling musicians and the mess they made of love, the twice-cursed assassination of Venustiano Carranza, all the patron saints, and ninety-six ways a man can try to cross a bridge.

Heather Says: This story blew my entire mind. It was lovely, and tragic, and hilarious, and everything that a good novel should be. The parts of this fic that map out the unseen lives of Imelda, Hector, and Ernesto, that hidden backstory that a movie can only hint about, were exquisite to the point that I was afraid getting to the point where, well, they die, would be a letdown. It really wasn’t. If anything, the story managed to get richer as it went along, until suddenly you’re in a room sobbing into a pillow at four in the morning and have to be awake in four hours. No regrets.

3. Under the Covers by @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 87k

Steve is (maybe) a little bit still in love with Nancy Wheeler and (maybe) trying to figure himself out-- between the night terrors and the babysitting and the general weirdness that is Hawkins, Indiana-- before he graduates.

Billy Hargrove fits in there somewhere (probably).

Heather Says: Under the Covers was the first Harringrove fic that actually kicked me over the edge from ‘eh this ship looks like it would have good hate sex’ and into full-fledged believer. It’s an intricately crafted look into the world of Billy Hargrove and Steve Harrington post-season two and it is absolutely glorious.

4. Bloody Ruin by esama | Castlevania | Alucard/Trevor | 37k

Vampire hunter and a vampire try to get along.

Heather Says: Written before season two came out, this was one of those fics that I clicked on because the pairing interested me and I wanted to see how it worked. It did not disappoint, and even after I delved through the tag on ao3 after I marathoned season two, this is still my favorite.

5. a road less traveled and a life less led by Azzandra | Dishonored | Billie & The Outsider | 9k

She took him out of the Void, as promised. And then she kept him, she supposed.

Heather Says: You know all that fanart that started cropping up after Death of the Outsider came out? The ones where Billie and the Outsider crept around Dunwall or Karnaca stealing fish and safes and graffiti-ing buildings? The ones with that found family vibe? Yeah. This fic scratches the same itch that all that art did.

6. But I’m Not There Yet by sarahyyy | Yuri On Ice | Yuri/Otabek | 71k

“Are you not going to read the article?” she asks, flopping onto his bed. “Look who ranked second, just after Phichit Chulanont.”

Otabek reluctantly scrolls down, and oh. #2 - Yuri Plisetsky

In the embedded Instagram photo just under that subheading, a very grumpy Yuri is cuddling a very grumpy-looking cat. The caption reads: I found the cat version of me at the shelter today. #iknowisaidnomorecats #canyoublameme

Heather Says: And here, in the stupid cute category we have teenagers navigating love through social media. What’s more, there’s a companion fic.

7. flowers start to bloom in every different hue by orphan-account | Coraline | Coraline/Wybourn | 1k

Coraline grows up, gets a tattoo, and falls in love. In that order.

Heather Says: I read this fic on a slow day at work, often in quick bursts while I was waiting for the kitchen to finish my table’s food. It’s short. It’s sweet. It’s perfect. And honestly? It’s everything that I was looking for when I ventured into the Coraline tag on ao3 because I was curious.

8. Victory Conditions by @astolat | Transformers | Megatron/Optimus Prime | 37k

“Do you want me to tell you a story?” Megatron said mockingly. “You won’t like it, Prime. It’s not a very nice one.”

Heather Says: Fun fact, I’m not even in this fandom. I haven’t touched the Transformers fandom since the first movie came out in 2007 and I spent a very confusing week shipping a boy and his car. But Astolat has literally never lead me wrong, and I was having one of those bored days where nothing quite itches the right spot, so I sat down on the couch and spent two hours reading this. Worth it.

  9. just in it for the game by grim_lupine | Thor | Thor/Loki | 6k

“It's excellent rehabilitation for my image,” Loki says, widening his eyes. “They love you, and because of that they'll trust me. You wouldn't ruin this for me, would you?”

Thor glares at him.

Loki’s mouth twitches. “Also, it's the funniest thing that's ever happened to me.”

Heather Says: The Thor/Loki bug never really bit me until after Ragnorak came out. I mean, sure, I read it and it was good, but hella’s Frostiron fics basically destroyed me for any other Loki pairing. HOWEVER. Ragnorak happened and screwed that all the way up. Also, you know, this fic is absolutely lovely and was just what the doctor ordered.

10. so this guy walks into a bar by MasterOfAllImagination | Pacific Rim | Newt/Hermann | 2.5k

“Bourbon,” Hermann says, hooking his cane on the edge of the bar and sliding by degrees onto a stool.

“Straight up?” the bartender asks.

“Please.” Does he look like the kind of man who enjoys having his nostrils fumigated by undiluted whiskey? “On the rocks.”

Heather Says: I coped with Pacific Rim 2 by reading a couple AUs and a couple very, very long fics full of tragedy and math. Weirdly, the AU of a chance meeting in a bar was the one that stuck.

11. cherry pie by @brawlite & @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 133k

Billy Hargrove lives for summer. Endless sunshine, heavily chlorinated pools, roaming ice cream trucks, and unencumbered freedom? There’s nothing better.

Even being stuck in Hawkins can’t ruin the summer for him. He eats it up, devouring every day whole.

Heather Says: Yeah, okay, but this is the fic that made summer worth it. Highly recommend reading at the pool or with your feet hanging off the back porch. Every piece of this fic was dripping in summertime nostalgia. It was fan-freaking-tastic.

12. the ghost and the good queen val by Wildehack (tyleet) | Thor | Thor/Valkyrie/Loki | 27k

“What,” she says, her heart racing, “was that.”

“What was what?” Korg asks, frowning up at her. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

Valkyrie squints suspiciously at the ship.

“Oh my god,” Korg says. “You did! You saw a ghost!”

Heather Says: So, remember how I coped with Pacific Rim 2 with copious AUs? This is how I coped with Infinity War.

13. For Better or Worse by DragonBandit  | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 22k

All Damien ever wanted was someone who wanted him. All Damien deserves is to die alone, stripped bare of any of the comforts or affections of humanity, a title he willingly shed.

Mark Bryant seems to be the Universe's compromise.

Wherein Damien and Mark are soulmates, and this changes enough.

Heather Says: I think I’ve read this one three or four time this year? It’s 22k of well-written fic for a fandom that has a max of like 100 fics all with lengths that tend to vary between a couple hundred words to 2 or 3k, max. This fic is the one that really catapulted me into the fandom. 

14. in waves by @lymricks | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 38k

It’s March and it’s too cold for Billy to be shirtless and wearing shorts, but he hadn’t noticed until Harrington appeared and made him hold still. Harrington can’t seem to stop looking at the bruises. “What’s it to you if I miss a little school, Harrington?” Billy asks. He feels goosebumps rising on his skin.

“I don’t know,” Harrington snaps back, looking uncomfortable. He shifts his weight from one foot to the other. Plant your feet, Billy wants to scream at him. I’m going to bowl you over.

Heather Says: And here we have the first fic that wasn’t written by either @toast-ranger-to-a-stranger or @brawlite that made me realize that this fandom was gonna be a good one. So fantastic.

15. the cure by aquaexplicit | The Flash | Cisco/Harry | 43k

“I guess I don’t really get what you need to fix? Harrison Wells is a hot, rich genius that pays you to make cool stuff with his daughter and is totally into you. If you guys boning is the biggest problem you have, I think this officially qualifies as your best relationship ever.”

When Barry puts it like that, everything sounds so simple and not at all as angst ridden as Cisco has been suffering the past few months.

Cisco hangs up on him.

Heather Says: I remember a couple years ago, I fell absolutely head over heels for this one Sterek fic where Derek had twin toddlers and Stiles was the hired babysitter. So I think there’s something about dad + babysitter fics that get me, even if this one in particular the ‘baby’ in question is a fifteen year old genius. Still. Dad + babysitter. I don’t even know, but apparently it works for me.

16. pull out the insides by SpineAndSpite | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 3k

“Stop,” Damien says again, more insistent this time.

“I’m not doing it on purpose.” Mark's heart pounds in his ears and he sees Damien’s hands shaking. God. They shouldn’t have started talking about sex. Shouldn’t have filled in the colors and shadows to this pencil outline of a sketch forming between them. They shouldn’t have given it a name.

Heather Says: This year seems to have had a theme when it comes to fics that I’ve liked and it seems to boil down to: people who are bad for each other have sex and catch feelings. Mark/Damien is not the healthiest ship. But it also hurts in this stupidly tragic way and hell if I didn’t fall head over heels for it.

17. tell me, get my shit together by paperclipbitch | Star Wars | Han/Lando | 5k

“I thought we were actively avoiding each other after the Trandosha Shitshow,” Han says.

“We’re actively avoiding each other after the Iridonia Shitshow,” Lando corrects him, “the Trandosha Shitshow is That Which We Do Not Speak Of.”

Heather Says: So, guess what I did in the two to three hours after seeing Solo? If you guessed: ‘combed through ao3 until you ran out of fic’ ding ding ding, you are 100% correct. This one was very, very good, which makes sense, because paperclipbitch has some good shit.

18. chases, escapes, true love, miracles by pepperfield | The Flash | Cisco/Harry 55k

Just because the timeline has been restored, doesn't mean things are back to normal. Cisco's got 99 problems, and Harry Wells is approximately 38 of them.

In which Cisco makes a bunch of plans, fails most of them, narrowly avoids being disintegrated, receives a hug or two, finds his groove, and gets his man. More or less in that order.

Heather Says: This one was long and wibbly wobbly, because it was basically what season 3 should have been. But it was also really great, and had some super quality Harrisco interactions.

19. Your Pretty Little Heart by Ever-so-reylo | Star Wars | Reylo | 64k

Modern day AU in which Ben is an Alpha, Rey is an Omega, and they are way better at having sex than at communicating with each other.

Heather Says: Speaking of people who are probably a little bit bad for each other... This particular fic was new to me, not because of the um, extensive sexual content, but because I’m usually not a fan of A/B/O. But this one was extremely good, enough that I actually liked it for a/b/o aspect rather than in spite of it.

20. Draconia by perceived_nobility | The Bright Sessions | Mark/Damien | 4k

"So I was driving. One ex wife and one ex husband later, stopping at the same fucking gas stations you and I stopped at."

Heather Says: This fic actually prompted a 3 hour long conversation on the ‘adult’ Mark/Damien discord where we basically outlined an entire fic that I never got around to writing where Damien is raising a child, has a farm, and runs into Mark ten years down the ride. One day, I might write it, because vaguely domestic, meet-again-ten-years-down-the-road fics always bowl me right the fuck over and just. There needs to be more fic like this one in the world. But until then, the world can marvel at the beauty that is this one.

21. Artifice by buttpatrol | Wolf 359 | Hera/Eiffel | 23k

A story told in parts about colour palettes, identity, robot uprisings, sensational trials, space, and messy love.

Heather Says: As I’ve recently finished relistening to Wolf 359 I have a fresh appreciation for this fic, which is one of the only longer fics on ao3 that just grips you by the heart and squeezes the same way that the series does. It might have been written before the end of the series, but it’s honestly just as perfect.

22. (shoot the lights out, hide) till its bright out by lipgallagher | Stranger Things | Billy/Steve | 93k

The most dangerous thing walking around Hawkins goes by the name Billy Hargrove.

And he fucking knows it.

Heather Says: I’m kind of cheating here, because this is a series rather than a single fic, but I’m not picking just one part. I read the first four or so parts of this fic when I was visiting my family in South Carolina and spent the next few days wandering around the place half-in Steve Harrington’s headspace. It was an incredibly surreal experience, which lead to a pretty strong combination of mania, depression, and an indescribable craving for ice cream. So like, maybe don’t read this fic if you’re in a bad head space? But also it’s very good and features one of the most fucked up and intriguing Steve’s that I’ve seen yet.

23. Until My Feet Bleed and My Heart Aches by Reiya | Yuri On Ice | Yuuri/Viktor | 197k

‘…Of all the rivalries in the world of sports over the years, perhaps none has become so legendary as that of Russian figure skater Viktor Nikiforov and his rival, Japanese Yuuri Katsuki…’

Heather Says: I actually read this one on the plane ride down to South Carolina, and kind of didn’t like it at first? I’m not sure if it was just the act of putting Yuuri and Victor into the position of rivals that made me uncomfortable or the goddamn delays that turned half a day of travelling into a full one, but eventually I was able to get into and enjoyed it quite a bit. I really like the rivals to lovers trope, so I’d been looking forward to this one a lot.

24. Traveling Far by @astolat | Game of Thrones | Jaime/Brienne | 24k

Three weeks into their delightful slog across Westeros, during yet another charming day of shitting in the woods, eating half-raw squirrel, and trudging his feet bloody, the single most dour and uninteresting woman Jaime had ever met in all of Westeros stopped in the middle of a field, drew a deep breath, and said, “When I was seven, my aunt came to visit with her son. My father told me that as the daughter of the house, it was my duty to show hospitality to my guests and to be gracious to them. I wanted to make him proud. So for three weeks, I let my cousin follow me around and talk to me about spiders.”

Heather Says: I’ve become very fond of astolat’s Jaime/Brienne fics, and I think this one is my favorite yet. Featuring Starks, found family, and a whole lot of walking.

25. lilies of the valley (cover me with kisses, make my garden grow) by diasterisms | Star Wars | Reylo | 8k

Every girl is entitled to the mistake. That one colossal fuck-up that permanently alters the terrain of who you are. You'll either learn from it or you won't, so might as well have the time of your life.

Heather Says: I just. I really like flower shop AUs, and the idea of a Kylo Ren who owns a sleek flower shop being menaced by a tiny gremlin in a leather jacket just. Kills me. It was really sweet and all kinds of wonderful.

[realityhelixcreates]

Lasabrjotr Chapter 29: Fear in Finery

Chapters: 29/? Fandom: Thor (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe Rating: Teen And Up Warnings: None Relationships: Loki x Reader (Let’s try this again) Characters: Loki (Marvel), Reader, Brunnhilde, Thor Additional Tags: Post-Endgame: Best Possible Ending (Canon-Divergent), On The Road, Horse With A Side Of Extra Horse, Shut Up Todd,  Summary:  You're having second thoughts about sitting in a courtroom with a man who tried to murder you, no matter how many gods are between you.

You were absolutely, completely, off your head drunk; a condition for which Loki was solely to blame.

“No work today.” He had said. “We must speak with lawyers, and that is work enough.”

He's been right. You had thought about teasing him for his perceived laziness: imagine calling off all your princely duties, just because you had to talk to someone!

But talking to the lawyers was excruciating. They were frighteningly serious, determined to get every last bit of information out of you, calm, cold, and unsympathetic. They had to be; it was an important part of their job. You didn't blame them for it, but having to re-live the experience two separate times-one for the prosecuting lawyer and another for the defending-was exhausting.

They hadn't let you and Loki be in the same room while they were asking their questions, leaving him irritable, and you an anxiety-riddled mess by the end of it all. The sticky honey buns you had made that morning hadn't stayed with you, and so, after they lawyers had satisfied themselves and left, he had whisked you away to one of the little private dining rooms to the side of the banquet hall, and ordered a lot of food, a lot of drink, and one of Beli's apprentices to provide music.

Loki himself had served you, in a reversal of his usual role. And you had allowed him, and now you were totally drunk.

He'd served you something he called 'crystal mead'; a sparkling, bubbly drink that changed color depending on how the light hit it.

“This is very young.” He had said. “So it should not be too potent for you.” It was so delicious, that you couldn't seem to stop drinking it, and even the food had not saved you from drunkenness.

You swayed to the music, unfamiliar but beautiful, trying to hum along. You thought you were doing pretty well, but Loki snickered every time you tried.

“It appears you have proven me wrong, my dear. Be proud. Precious few have ever done so.”

“Ooohhh, I'm Loki, and I'm soooo smart, and never wrong!” You snarked thoughtlessly. “I'm sooo strong, and soo handsome, and I've got everything under control.”

Loki grinned widely. ���Your accent is off. If you are to impersonate me, you will need more practice. Tell me more about how handsome I am.”

“You hush! You know how scared I am? I don't wanna go! I don't wanna see that guy again, and I'm tired of almost dying! Can I stop?”

Loki sighed. “You have my permission to stop almost dying. I...well, I can't say I'm exactly the paragon of not almost dying, but I'll do what I can to keep you from also almost dying.”

“Howwww many times have you almost died?” You asked.

“Eh, three or four times.” He shrugged. “Not that often, in the long run.”

In the long run. In a life of thousands of years, perhaps that wasn't very many. Still, you were pretty sure that Saldis had never almost died, so maybe it was much worse than he was trying to make you believe. To you, it was still an unacceptable number of times. Surely Loki could not be allowed to die before you did. It just didn't seem right.

You patted his hand sloppily. “Loki. Loki, Loki, Loki.” You repeated. “That's way too much. Don't do that any more. You've used up all your turns, so you have to stop.”

“Well, since my Seidkona commands...”

“That's right! I'm Seidkona, so listen to me!...I still don't wanna go. But I'll go. Gotta do the right thing.”

“Well, not always...” He trailed off. “But if you're feeling brave, then yes. Do the right thing. In this case, it seems that duty commands it.”

You started to take another drink, but Loki stole the mead right out of your hands, and replaced it with an apple juice.

“Wha? Hey! Gimmie that back!” You protested. “I'm not done!”

“I'm afraid you are my dear. We can't have you so drunk this early in the day, can we? It's not even dark out yet!” The teasing was heavy in his voice. You crossed your arms and huffed.

“It doesn't get dark anymore!” You grumped. “Night time doesn't exist! The stars are lies, and the moon is a ghost!”

“Poetic, but you still cannot have any more. Here, have some bread instead. This one has that jam you like so much.” He always seemed to make sure that jam was there. You chewed the bread as if you were angry with it.

“I miss Phil.” You mumbled. Loki crooked one perfect eyebrow.

“Who is Phil?”

“My philodendron. He's special. He's as big as me, and he had variegated leaves. That's pretty rare. Normally they're really expensive, but Tara got me a cutting from her aunt, and I raised it...raised it up...I hope he's doing all right...” You choked the words out around the sudden lump in your throat, and Loki went from teasing to concerned in less time than it took to look.

“_____, I-”

You buried your head in your arms and let the tears burst out.

“I haven't talked to Tara in months! I haven't even sent her a letter! I almost got killed, and I didn't even leave her a note to say I was okay! She's my best friend, and I just forgot her!”

“N-now, now, _____,” Loki quickly, giving your back an awkward pat. “I'm sure she understands that your life has taken an unforeseen turn, and that you simply aren't as available-”

“I haven't paid my rent!” You wailed. “They probably sold all my stuff! Or trashed it! My plants! My cookbooks! My sketches! I can't replace them! My plants counted on me, and I abandoned them to go play fairy tale in some mythical world, where it's never night!”

A gesture from Loki sent the minstrel away, leaving just the two of you, you still sobbing onto the table, and Loki at a loss for what to do. Finally, he settled for draping one arm over your shoulders, and letting you decided the level of comfort you wanted.

“If you would like, we can contact your father, to see if he salvaged any of your belongings.” He offered. “If not, I intended to take you into town to get a few things for yourself anyway. We are going to be providing you with a cell phone, so you will be able to contact your friends and family. You haven't abandoned anyone, you've just been temporarily unavailable. Don't fret now, my dear, let all that stress go...”

He let you cry yourself out, offering the occasional coo or murmur of encouragement, and a handkerchief, as soon as you were done. It was, of course, brilliant green, with golden embroidery, and you almost felt bad for utterly wrecking it with your nose. Loki seemed to think it could be salvaged though, tucking it away somewhere in his magic pockets.

“Here, eat your bread now.” He said, pushing the plate at you once again. “And no more mead for a while. We will have to find a formula you can withstand. Your mortal blood is far too thin for our alcoholic accomplishments.”

“Rude.” You muttered, gobbling bread.

                                                                             *****

“Which do you think?” Loki asked from in front of the full length mirror, holding up two sets of his horns. “The full helmet, or the hollow top?”

“Perhaps we should avoid wearing anything that could be considered martial in nature?” Thor suggested, sounding terribly bored.

“Hm, you think so? Well, I do have a set that more of a coronet-”

“Just braid your hair and be done with it, you insufferable dandy!”

“You can't call me a dandy!” Loki huffed. “You have beads in your beard.”

“They hold the braid in place, and they make me look dashing.” Thor preened.

“They make you look like a barbarian.”

“You are simply envious that I have a beard to put beads in!”

“Oh yes, so greatly do I regret my inability to fully cultivate the 'filthy vagrant' look! Whatever shall I do, with only my impeccable fashion sense to back me up?”

The brothers bickered and debated every thing from armor, to accessories, to footwear, eventually settling down so that Thor could wind green ribbons into his brother's hair.

You had been provided with a weeks worth of dresses, each finer than anything you had ever worn. You had never even imagined your wedding dress-if you ever got to have a wedding-would be of such high quality. Gratifyingly, you could tell that some of them were older, altered pieces, which you tended to prefer for practicality's sake. Even more gratifying: they weren't all green.

You, and Saldis, and Brunnhilde, and Borgliot had all been gathered in the King's chambers very early in the morning-or very late at night, with the sun misbehaving so, it was impossible for you to tell anymore-to prepare for your journey to the city. The king had said that it would take the better part of a day on horseback, and that the trial would likely not last long, as the defendant had pleaded guilty, with no remorse at all for his crimes.

Reservations had been made for a weeks worth of time, and Loki promised you that, whatever moments were spent outside the trial, you could chose to spend however you wished. Saldis would be coming along, for she spoke Icelandic as well as English, and could read it too; she would be there to translate things for you during those times that Loki had to be parted from you, and she was to see to your care and attire. She bubbled with an excitement you thought it was far too early-or late-for, showing you the intricacies of wearing a snake-shaped pen-annular brooch that twisted and turned in your hands like the very reptile it resembled.

“How...again?” You asked, unable for the life of you, to get the long pin in the right place. You'd been gifted a gorgeous deep blue cloak that was sure to keep you warm; Loki had been very solemn and proud to wrap it around your shoulders, but he hadn't bothered showing you how the pin worked when he'd handed it over.

“Just like this, my Seidkona.” Saldis said, fastening the brooch with a quick movement. It looked so simple when she did it.

You sighed. “I feel like a child.” You complained. “Can't even dress myself.”

“High class clothing is complex.” Saldis explained. “Most nobles cannot dress themselves.”

“Besides, you kinda look like a child too.” Brunnhilde said, offhandedly, as she twisted her braided hair into a tidy topknot. “Mortals are all pretty small, but your little body, on that little horse...you're going to look like an elf.” At your crestfallen expression, she hastened to add. “But that's fine. Elves are considered lucky. All of the shorter Asgardians you see have Alfar in their backgrounds.”

All of the shorter Asgardians were still half a foot taller than you. Being short wasn't something you'd ever really noticed, before coming here. Among other humans, height variance felt far less pronounced.

“Methinks thou hast 'hashed it', my general.” Borgljot jested. “Our dear mortal is surely no child.”

You caught her gazing appreciatively at the way the diagonal elements in your clothes flattered your figure, and you grew a little warm. You hadn't been awake long enough to be able to appreciate flirting from anyone, let alone a six-foot-three warrior woman from space.

Brunnhilde nudged her sharply. “Mind your manners.”

“She is not incorrect.” Loki called from near the mirror. “I happen to know that my Seidkona is very much a woman.”

You took in a deep breath, but decided not to tell him off in front of everyone. Later. Borgliot's impudent grin faltered as she glanced from the prince, to you, to Brunnhilde, who simply gave her a very pointed look. Her face fell, and she said nothing else.

Loki came to guide you to the horses, while Saldis gathered your luggage. Thor had convinced him to wear no armor at all; instead he had girded himself in an intricately beaded tunic made of velvet so plush that your hands itched to touch it, and trousers so well-tailored that your eyes simultaneously screamed to keep looking and to turn away. It was practically scandalous, and you were embarrassed by how intriguing you found just this one set of clothes.

Thor was also resplendent in his finery, with his doublet and red cloak, and shining buttons, his ribboned hair an opposite color match for his brother. It was a nice touch, in lieu of crowns.

In fact, the entire entourage was absolutely majestic, and you felt like a dog someone had dressed up in a matching costume. Your clothes were right, but you were out of place.

Maybe it was just the apprehension you still felt towards seeing your would-be murderer again, or towards being in a court of law. Being out among humankind again, knowing that some of them saw you as a traitor to your species.

“Would you like to ride the same horse as before?” Loki asked you, as the stablehands led Leynarodd out to him. You nodded. Technically, that horse deserved justice as well.

A loud and happy whicker caught your attention and you glanced around in search of the animal that could have made the sound.

“Who was that?” You asked. It wasn't Leynarodd, who was contentedly munching the apple Loki had offered her, and it certainly wasn't the shaggy, placid little beast that had been brought to you.

“Oh, that was the other horse I rescued from Ragnarok.” Loki said with a little smile, stroking Leynarodd's broad forehead.

The thumping of hooves grew, odd-sounding, almost like striking iron. The animal that approached was enormous; bigger than Leynarodd, bigger than any horse ever was or could be. He was shining silver-gray, ribbons and bells in his mane and tail. Thor perched atop his back like a scene out of legend, and, if all eight hooves striking the ground with the sound of metal were any indication, that's exactly what this was.

“Is...is that...?” You breathed out in awe. This creature was equal parts beautiful and terrifying, his perfection and wrongness impressed into your mind. It occurred to you that no one had ever said animals could not be gods as well.

“It is.” Loki said proudly. “Saddle up, my dear. Not all of us can keep Sleipnir's speed, and we have a long ride ahead of us.”

You mounted your sweet, small horse, who seemed not at all perturbed by the legendary beasts she was expected to travel with. Perhaps you ought to try to be more like her.

“Can you tell me this girls name?” You asked.

“Believe that one's Acorn.”

“Acorn?” The horse's ears perked, and you hugged her neck. “Oh, that's so cute!”

“And somewhat ironic, considering there are no oak trees here, so she's likely never seen one. Onward! The day is young.”

The procession wended slowly through the streets, the people gathering to solemnly wish you all well. This was not a situation that called for celebration; instead, the people waved squares of gray cloth, and played slow drum beats on the corners.

“It's to symbolize that we are going to a battle who's outcome is uncertain.” Loki explained. “Legal battles should be able to go either way, in the nature of fairness. But we know how this will end, if not all the details.”

The drums faded behind you as you reached the edge of the city, replaced by a slightly different sound; that of chanting. Angry chanting.

Past the gate, past the increased number of einherjar, blocking the road out, was a crowd of people, chanting louder and louder at the approach of your little cavalcade. Most of them were carrying signs, and too many of those had your face on them.

Dread rolled down your bones. Was there any possibility they were there in support? The red slashes you saw through your own face put those hopes to rest.

What had you done to deserve this?

It looked as though Loki was suffering the same treatment, with signs and chants, but aside from a slight scowl, he showed no signs of acknowledging the hostile crowd. Trying to take a page from his book, you turned away from the people, and fixed your eyes on Leynarodd instead.

Beautiful, shining Leynarodd, and her beautiful, statuesque rider. Just stay next to them, and you would be safe.

Someone broke free of the chanting ranks, darted into the procession, and grabbed you by the hand. You turned to look down into possibly the least expected-and least welcome of faces.

“Todd?” You squeaked, disbelieving. He couldn't be here. You didn't want him here! You hadn't seen him in over a year, and there was a good reason for that!

“_____, baby, I'm so glad I found you!” Todd exclaimed, as the horses came to a halt. He gestured at the einherjar currently closing the gate. “These clowns wouldn't let anyone into the city, even though I told them about us.”

You yanked your hand out of his. “There's no us, Todd. What the hell are you doing here? How did you even get here?”

The huge head of Sleipnir shoved between the two of you causing the ruckus from the crowd to calm in awe of his presence.

“What the hell? The fuck is wrong with that horse?” Todd nearly shouted.

“He's probably a little peckish.” Thor said dryly. “Oh, you mean the legs, of course you mean the legs, everyone means the legs. It's simple really. It's because he's twice the horse you'll ever be.”

“I...what...” Todd stammered. Loki reached down and placed his hand firmly on your shoulder, either comforting you, or holding you in place so that you could not hop off your little horse and run off with Todd. Little did he know that nothing was further from your mind.

“Forgive me, where are my manners?” Thor said. “I am Thor, king of Asgard, Avenger and defender of Earth. And you are?”

“Uh, Todd Emmerst, sir, your Majesty. Big fan of your work, sir. You see, I've come all the way from Iowa to see _____ again. Now, I don't know the whole story about why she's here, but everyone back home misses her a lot, especially me. I gotta ask; do you really need to keep her? I miss her so much, is there any way you could make it so you could give me my girl back?”

You rolled your eyes. “I'm not your girl, Todd!” You snapped. “The only thing I am of yours is your ex!”

Thor glanced at you, then back. “It appears there is some discrepancy.”

“We had a disagreement.” Todd said. “She was taken away before we got the chance to make up.”

“Did I take you away from him?” Loki asked in a low whisper. “You never mentioned anyone.”

“He's not my boyfriend.” You hissed. “And I never wanted to see him again! He's a total jerk!” He was exactly what you didn't need today, or any day. “Make him go away!”

Loki's prefect eyebrows scaled his forehead. “If my Seidkona commands it.” He said, a wicked grin growing. You barely noticed a little twiddle of his fingers before the crowd started screaming.

With Sleipnir's enormous bulk between you and everything else, you couldn't see what had set them off, but if the shrieks of “Snake!” were any indication, you could certainly guess.

“Everyone get to a safe distance!” Thor shouted, and the crowd obeyed, opening up enough for the procession to pass.

“You know, Brother...” Thor said, when you were all far enough away not to be overheard. “You have been here long enough to be aware that there are no snakes in Iceland.”

“Oh, I am.” Loki said, oh-so smugly proud of himself. “But they clearly aren't.”

“They nearly trampled that man.”

“Oh, that's too bad. Nearly? I shall have to try harder next time.”

“Loki!” Thor scolded.

“I asked him to.” You piped up. “Todd can hold up a debate for hours. He would have tied us up all morning. So I asked him to hurry things along.”

“My Seidkona demanded it of me, and I was helpless under the power of her voice.” Loki said, and your face burned.

“You really dislike him?” Saldis asked. “He seemed pleasant.”

“Oh yeah, he always does when he's in public.” You said hotly. “Then you're left to wonder what happened to that guy when you get home. Why he's like this behind closed doors, why he gets so controlling and insulting when no one else can see him. Or worse, if it's all in your head, if you're really just making it all up, or if it's just you. Yeah, no thanks. Not going back to that.”

“He sounds exceptionally huglausi to me.” Loki huffed. Borgliot murmured her agreement. “And you wanted to scold me.”

“He is behind us now, and will remain that way.” Thor said. “Hopefully that will be the last interruption for the day. We have reservations to meet.”

[rose-lighters]

Time to rank every MCU film

Yes I am doing that oh so original thing of ranking every marvel film from worst to best. Criticisms and debates are welcome. (Disclaimer: I like all these films unless stated otherwise)

X. Incredible Hulk - I haven’t seen it. Sorry.

21. Guardians Of the Galaxy Vol. 2 - I can honestly say I hated this film. The only likeable part of the whole film was the soundtrack and the first few minutes with Groot dancing. Beyond that it was dull, cringy and oh so predictable. The second that Ego (???) appeared and said he was Quill’s dad I was just like “Oh so this guy’s the villain then” and noped out of there. I never saw past that point and don’t intend to.

20. Captain America: The Winter Soldier - People praise this film till kingdom come and I for one do not get it at all. Many say that it is unique in moving away from the typical superhero film and towards the spy genre. Maybe I just don’t like spy films but it is in no means a great Marvel film. I liked it enough but it’s so forgettable I had to google the plot for this review. I liked the characters and all but it just never stuck with me as anything special.

19. Guardians Of the Galaxy -  Maybe I just don’t like the guardians??? I don’t know but this was another film that just didn’t stick with me. I like Rocket and Groot but beyond that the Guardians themselves hold no interest with me. I don’t care for the humor particularly and whilst the music is great that really shouldn’t be the best part of a film unless it’s a musical.

18. Avengers: Age of Ultron - People hate this film, I however do not. It’s an okay Marvel film, I don’t care for it enough to hate it. I like that scene where they’re all trying to lift mjolnir and I think I liked the ending (I watched it like two years ago so I don’t remember that well) but I have to agree with a lot of the criticism of white washing the Maximoffs (despite how much I love Elizabeth Olsen and Aaron Taylor Johnson, it was still shady). I didn’t hate the ‘giving Hawkeye a family’ like a lot of people did because the already made it clear he wasn’t like comic Clint.

17. Thor: The Dark World - Now we’re moving into films I do like (I love Marvel films more than I dislike them, it's literally just GOTG2 that I don’t like). This was a good film from what I can remember (as I said it's been a while since I’ve seen a lot of these films). I liked the story arcs, I liked that it was set in places other than America and space (ok, so I’m from England, sue me), I loved Tom Hiddleston in this film and I like Darcy. All in all it was an enjoyable viewing, a little dull at times but generally harmless.

16. Doctor Strange - This would be further up if it wasn’t for how dull the first half hour or so is. I had to go back and watch this months after I had first tried just because the start was so boring. Once I moved past it however it was a great origin film. I liked the humour in it and I have always had a soft spot for magic so it was a brilliant film. The effects were absolutely stunning and on aesthetics alone it would place as the second or third best marvel film. I loved the good guys and was genuinely rooting for them despite Strange being a bit of a snarky arsehole.

15. Iron Man - Is this a very important film? Yes. Is it a great film? Also yes. Do I remember it? Not at all. Okay, so I remember some stuff and what I do remember was great but to say its a film that sticks out would be a lie. It’s THE origin story in as much as it’s a formulaic one: flawed character is traumatised and realises their flaws in the process, is influenced by important person, becomes a hero and is betrayed. It works though. That’s the thing, it works so damn well that its almost not in the formula. It's a great watch and honestly RDJ looks great in it (so not the point but I digress). That bit with Stane ripping out the arc reactor made me feel betrayed and I kinda knew it was coming. ( https://tonynatashas.tumblr.com/post/184375713429/that-scene-in-iron-man-where-obadiah-stane-is this post explains why this scene is so great important)

14. Captain America: The First Avenger - Another (enjoyable) origin story. If Sebastian Stan wasn’t in it it would probably be three places down but hey I have a type. No but seriously this was a great film because not only did it show off the brilliance of Roger’s transformation and gave us an idea of who he was and what motivates him but it also then gives us details of his waking in the 21st century and begins to expose his issues with this time travel (for want of a better phrase). This film shows you what you’re gonna get whilst still having pretty good effects, a good, solid storyline and a pretty badass comic book villain. The serum guy creeps me out though and there are so many ethical issues of that level of human experimentation on a person whose only friend went off to war, had Steve died they chose someone no one would really miss which is so concerning.

13. Captain Marvel - A lot of people may have a criticism of this film being so far down but for me it needs to be. I like superhero films where the main character overcomes a flaw and amnesia is not a character flaw. This is a good origin story but it is not a great marvel film. I like Carol but I don’t love her. I love the fact that we have a superhero film with a female main character and i liked that scene where she talks with biker guy but it felt like Samuel L Jackson was a more interesting character at times. I often rate characters on humor so there’s that. It was a good film but I’m mostly looking forward to what will be done with the character as she has so much potential. 

12. Spiderman: Homecoming - This is a weird one for me. It’s the only marvel film I own on DVD and it’s the only one I like where I skip scenes. I can not deal with cringy humour so I skip 80% of the jokes and awkward moments in this film however it’s a really good film. It’s funny and the music is great, I love Zendaya and Jacob Batalon probably more than Tom Holland, their roles are great and the film’s emphasis on friendship is one of the elements from the Iron Man and Captain America films that I love just further amplified. The references to Ferris Bueller and the fact that it is, at its core, a teen flick makes it a brilliant film. The vulture twist was also amazing. 

11. Ant-man and the Wasp - I feel like it isn’t talked about enough but I really bloody love Scott Lang. He is one superhero that I can really get behind because above all else he is just the nicest guy. He is probably one of the most human seeming characters in the MCU and it always makes for such an enjoyable viewing. This could probably draw with ant-man in terms of great films. I loved Ava Starr so much and my heart really went out to her and that FBI guy was a total joy to watch. The Ant man films are so funny and light hearted that they don’t have that sort of weariness that other MCU films have. If only Luis told more stories in the MCU.

10. Ant-man - Honestly just look above. Also I love Hank Pym and Hope Van Dyne so much. The villain was kind of eh but I loved the heist aspect.

9. Black Panther - I watched this film for Shuri and to an extent because I felt obligated to so I had low expectations. People were talking about it for the significance of fighting for equality (which I am all for, don’t worry) so I was expecting it to not live up to the hype and it didn’t. That being said it was a bloody great movie. The movie was beautiful, the use of colour and the CGI tech was so damn pretty. The plot was brilliant and for a while I wanted Erik Killmonger to win, he put forward a good argument and I like a ‘baddy’ so to speak. The fights were great and I was so here for their version of going under cover finally not being a hoodie and cap. Was it over hyped? Hell yeah. Was it still a great film? 100%

8. Iron Man 3 - This gets a hell of a load more crap than it deserves, mostly from comic book fans who can’t stand that their precious mandarin was a hoax but honestly I respect the fuck out of marvel for that. Rather than having a stereotypically asian terrorist they turned that stereotype on its head and made the white guy the actual terrorist. Ben Kingsley is one of my favourite actors and he was amazing. I, obviously, also loved the representation of PTSD as a serious issue and how it was displayed in all of its real ugliness. For once it didn’t just show a damaged person who was fixed with romance. So yeah, this film was a masterpiece.

7. Captain America: Civil War - Zemo may just be my favourite MCU villain to date, why? Because he fucking won. This was a film about a man who knew his victims and rather than stupidly trying to attack the big scary strong guys he exposed them and made the best of circumstance. He got under Captain America’s skin and played him like a puppet. This was more than just a villain, this was finally a smart villain. Not to mention that this film had some of the best action sequences and heart breaking moments whilst still having time for a laugh. It’s also the first film (in my opinion) that called out Steve’s morals and his obsession with the past. Bucky was hot used against him and it showed that above all else, even the little people, Steve’s loyalties are with his past.

6. Thor - Most people would disagree and rate this film far lower however for me this was the start. I didn’t grow up watching superhero films because I didn’t like watching TV as a kid so it wasn’t till I was 13 that I saw a superhero film and this was it. I honestly watched it because my friend had it on DVD and I thought Tom Hiddleston looked hot but from what I can remember this was one of the best films I ever saw. I wasn’t too bothered by Jane Foster but I absolutely loved Darcy, Loki and Thor. Whilst I’m not adopted I do know what it is like to be the younger and smarter sibling with an older thuggish brother who is still the favourite so I loved Loki with a passion and was so upset when he fell.

5. Iron Man 2 - This was the film that made me realise that I liked girls, Scarlet Johansson in a black cat suit and red ringlets was an amazing thing to little 13 year old me. Beyond that it was just a solid film, it had spies and daddy issues and sass and Samuel L Jackson. What more can you want?

4. Thor: Ragnarok - This is the peak of Thor, I’m calling it now. Never had a director before been able to capture the absolute chaos of Loki and the sweetheart-ness of Thor so brilliantly. As far as representations of characters this, Captain Marvel and Iron Man 3 may just be the best of all the MCU. This is the full completion of Thor’s arc, this is the film that the first Thor set up. Finally Thor is ready to be King. This film had so much humour but still set it all up so perfectly that it was more than just a comedy. Jeff Goldblum was amazing and honestly Taika Waititi should direct the whole of the MCU. He knows the characters better than anybody.

3. Avengers: Endgame - I cried three times. That scene with the portals was the most beautiful thing I have ever witnessed and whilst many criticize much of the plot I don’t have too much I’d change, though in fairness I did like the cursed child so maybe I just have a soft spot for all things time travel. Dynamic timelines are not used in cinema enough and the three alternate timelines create have all sorts of implications for future films in the MCU. If Thor is not fat in the next film this may go down to 20th though.

2. Avengers Assemble - This is the film that I believe best represents what the MCU has to offer. It’s a light hearted superhero film with all the characters that were needed at this point in time. For its time it was ambitious and honestly it shows. I loved the dynamics between the characters, the plot was engaging and not overly complex and even if you haven’t seen any other MCU films it makes perfect sense. In some respects it probably is the best the MCU has to offer.

1. Avengers: Infinity War - Oh boy do I love this film. This isn’t just a film, this is the film. Did it have the same emotional impact as Endgame? Fuck no but it didn’t need to. It was serious. It was funny. It had just the right amount of just the right characters and may I just say that is the best that Captain America has ever looked in the MCU. I (controversially) really loved Gamora dying and most of the Guardians being dusted. The memes were great.This was the most ambitious cross over event since Wizards of deck with Hannah Montana. One thing that I can’t get out of my head though is Bruce’s comment of “broke up like the beatles?”. Does that make Bucky Yoko Ono?

[the-insomniac-cat]

(my photo edit- this is the cover I gave this story on Wattpad- ’Gold Gerbera’ is my a/c name there)

Shamelessly re-blogging my 2018 post-Infinity War + post AV4 fic of Loki and Thor meeting up- because lots of us still hurt. (obvs. no Endgame spoilers!)

I wrote it in June 2018, and I just assumed that Thanos would be defeated in AV4 somehow.

Hope you  enjoy it.

Hell, hope you read it :)

“I’m There”

Thor is honouring Loki, commemorating his death, praying as he did for Odin in Ragnarok. Loki finds him there, takes him for a walk and they talk about Ragnarok, and Infinity War, their past and what happens to Loki next.

Word Count- 2100+

It had been nine days since the fall of Thanos. The Avengers had said their goodbyes to the others who'd fought, and then retired to Stark Tower.

They had not had time to pause during the war, to reflect or process all the horror around them, or digest the difficult decisions that had had to be made. Their time together like this, afterwards, was essential and, though they tried to keep it feeling casual they all knew that sometimes, meetings could be more jovial than was really warranted. No matter. Debriefs, official and otherwise, had been done. Time together, drinks and reminiscing over the past. Eventually it could be delayed no longer- the days to split up and go their separate ways arrived. And, as those who still had homes went back to them, Thor sat on a cliff alone. In Norway.

He sat, quite relieved to be on his own at last, on a clifftop overlooking the sea. It was late evening. He had spent the last hour clearing a space and building an small pile of stones. It had a large stone at the bottom, and rose by smaller and smaller stones, till a pebble and barely a ball of grit sat on the top. He had placed blades of flowering grass around it, and arranged shells into the shape of two horns. When he was ready, he knelt down. Once comfortable, he prayed;

"Loki, I  bid you take your place in the halls of Valhalla Where thine enemies have been vanquished Where the brave shall live Forever Nor....."

...another voice joined in from behind him, "Nor shall we mourn but rejoice for those that have died the glorious death."

Thor knew, though didn't believe, who this was. It wasn't the first time that he had been interrupted whilst praying this way. He turned, slowly...

Loki stood there, looking down at him,  his eyes smiling, green and clear.

"Hello brother," Loki smiled.

Thor stared. He knew that this must not be true. He watched. It could only have taken a few moments but as he looked over his brother, soaking in every detail, it seemed much longer.

"Loki..." he said, barely above a whisper.

Loki stood in a familiar, simple black suit.  His arms hung at his sides, his palms slowly turning towards Thor.

"Walk with me, brother," he said.

Thor lifted himself off the ground and, hesitating, not taking his eyes off him, he walked towards Loki. Loki grinned and nodded, and the two of them turned to walk along the cliff, Loki with his long hands in his pockets.

His heart racing, Thor tried to act normally, and tried to pretend that he could take all this in his stride. So he sniffed loudly, coughed, ostensibly wiping his mouth across his wrist. Loki just looked ahead and smiled, full knowing what Thor was doing.

For a while, the only sound was from waves sweeping the beach below.

"Why did you come here?" Loki asked, at last.

"This is where our fath.... where Odin left us. And.. and he said to remember this place."

Loki looked down and swallowed, noticing how Thor had thought it might hurt him to call Odin his father. Very thoughtful of him, very discerning, he thought. But nothing could upset him now, and the usual jolt in the heart that such a thing would have caused before, didn't come.

"I was... I was thinking of you. I've missed you, Loki," Thor slowed down his pace, letting Loki walk ahead a little, "I am missing you." FInally, tears.

"I know." Loki smiled smiled back at him, tilting his head, "It's been hard for you. I have watched, you know."

Loki's grin: a smile, a chuckle. ‘Here he is!’ thought Thor, ‘Here's my brother! Making light of matters of sentiment!’

"Eh eh. Come on! I haven't finished with you yet." Loki signalled to Thor over his shoulder, "Come along."

The two strolled on, till they came to the rock where they'd sat with Odin before his spirit had ascended. Not speaking of what it was, they looked first at it and then each other, eyes meeting, and Thor realised where they were and smiled back at Loki. They took their seats and watched the kittiwakes as they swooped across the water, farther out to sea.

"Here was the beginning of the end," Thor looked thoughtfully at the empty space between them, where Odin had once sat. "Hela, Ragnarok, the war. We threw Asgard away. Lost so many. SO much blood, brother. So much blood shed through ALL our lives.” 

Loki sat quietly, soberly following Thor’s every word. His brother was fidgetting, getting flustered. He continued, “How are you....how are you able to even be here? -Everyone thought you would go to Helheim.”

Loki raised his eyebrows at this.

“I just mean. Ugh! What with all your twists and turns! Huh!" Thor turned to Loki, "I guess there is forgiveness after all."

"No, brother, there isn't,"

"Wh...what? You mean... what?" Thor began to panic. Had Loki come to say goodbye, before sinking to the land of the dishonourable dead? He gulped, tried to catch a breath, "NO! No that can't be. By the Gods! Not that place. There must be forgiveness, Loki. You can't go there. You can't be lost.."

"It's ALL. RIGHT." Loki held his hand a little above Thor's arm, then gently, "it's all... right.. I've not been judged unworthy. There is no forgiveness, but there is redemption. I've come here to say goodbye, dear brother, but also to thank you."

Thor's eyes were screwed up against tears and confusion, "Thank me? But.. wha ? What for? I only ever belittled you. I was unfair so often, Loki..."

"You gave me a chance when I needed it most. It's because of you, your actions, your decisions, that I am with our mother and father now.”

It was not lost on Thor's ears that Loki had acknowledged their parents. Loki continued:

"I was jealous at times, and my rage pushed you all away. But I always loved you. And when you said that Asgard was the people, I knew that you truly were their king at last. And I knew what I had to do for you. I knew then that I would die, if necessary, to save them. It was you, brother it was always you. I had to do what I could to get you all out of Asgard alive. "

"SO I WAS RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR DYING?"

"NO!" Loki ached to  reassure him, "No," he repeated, gently, smiling, "No, I made the  decision. It came to me that  if I bundled up all the power that I'd   used badly in the past, then I could do it. I reached down into myself and pulled together all my power and knew that I could  use it again, this time for a good thing. And it worked. It did hurt, but it worked. That's how I survived  the vaults. That's how I got out after bringing Surtur's head to the  Everlasting Flame. -I got out because I needed to. I willed it. I wasn't afraid."

"And the Tesseract? What of that? That led Thanos to us!"

"No. I took the Tesseract because I knew its power. I knew it could be a powerful weapon AGAINST Thanos:- he was already on his way. Heimdall had seen him. He spoke to me of it, on Bifrost, as we herded the people towards the ship. I hadn't known the size of HIS ship though. I hadn't known what was on board it, either. I thought he might come to us somewhere on land. I never thought he would attack us there. I didn't know Heimdall had seen him there."

Thor was looking down at his feet, mulling over Loki’s words. Gulls swooped low and snatched away the silence.

"But," he began quietly, as Loki leaned in to hear him, "But did you know that Thanos would kill you?" Tears again, dreading Loki's answer.

"I knew Thanos of old, "Loki explained, "He caught me when I fell into the abyss. And although he showed me more worlds and more knowledge than I would ever have seen had I stayed on Asgard, his price was high. I suffered, and I knew that he would make every being in the universe suffer. I KNEW that he would take half of everything," Loki paused,  "and," -waiting for Thor to look up at him- "there were TWO princes of Asgard..... so I knew he would want one of us."

Thor stared at him. He was just grasping how Loki had achieved his redemption. He had won it, as so often redemption is won, with a sacrifice. But had saving Thor really been enough? Enough to balance Loki's book? All those deaths? Injuries? Insults? Suffering?

Loki could hear his thoughts. "No," he smiled, "As much as I see my beloved brother's virtues, I don't think my saving just you would have helped in the great scheme of things!" Thor grinned. "Our actions, though, saved civilisations. And you were better to lead the Avengers, so you had to live. Would they have trusted me? Would anyone on Midgard? In a way, I died for having made them doubt me, through the terrible things I did in New York - I died for my past. I died for you, and I died for the future. That saved me. And without you, I wouldn't have done that."

Loki stood. "Thank you, Thor."

Thor and Loki locked eyes. Then Thor realised that Loki had just done something he hadn't done since they'd been boys together, playing chase in the corridors of Asgard's Royal Palace: he had used his name. He stood and went to hug him, just remembering at the last second that this was impossible. Loki nodded. Yes, he had wanted to as well.

"I have to go." Loki looked out across the sea.

Thor saw the sea breeze catch Loki's hair again. A tiny glimpse of hope stirred him once more: if Loki weren't really here, how can his hair move in the wind?

Loki turned, "It's because your mind adds in all the little details," he said, "That's why, if you look, I have a shadow, as well! Clever, isn't it?" He grinned.

Thor stared, amazed. He looked down and, sure enough, Loki was somehow casting a shadow. The ground that the shadow fell onto was real. But the shadow was not.

"Huh! Thor thought, "Well in all my centuries, I never knew that."

He looked up to witness an aquamarine swirl where Loki had been standing. It was spinning and changing to emerald, then gold. He fell back, afraid.

As the light cleared, Loki was there, resplendant, transformed. He was now dressed in clothes worthy of a hallowed place. But as he was no longer in danger, he needed no armour. Instead, he was robed in knee length black velvet, with Norse patterns around the edges, embroidered in sparkling gold thread. Jewels glistened around the collar. A twisting belt hung loosely around his hips. Long boots, in fresh, polished, black leather reached, with twisting patterns, to the ground. His black hair was longer now, falling past his shoulderblades, it was thick, neat and glossy in the evening sun. Above it, and fitting for a Prince, there sat a crown. Short sided, silver, and curled into a pattern showing the branches of Yggdrasil. His skin, not so pale now, clear and -to Thor's amazement- seeming so full of health and life. His eyes sparkled nothing but love.

"Goodbye, brother," he said, peacefully, smiling. He winked as he turned to walk towards the cliff edge.

"WAIT!" shouted Thor, "PLEASE!"

Loki turned, still smiling, and playfully rolled his eyes. "Always the last word, Thor?"

"Wait." Thor repeated, trying to remember what he was going to say. "Will I see you again? Will I see mother and father? Will I.. will I see you again?"

"There is a palace there," Loki nodded, "And a large refrectory. It has a long, dressed, table where everyone feasts. Our parents are keeping a place for you, near the top of it. You'll see." he grinned, then turned back to continue walking.

"AND YOU? LOKI! LOKI, WHAT OF YOU?!"

Loki looked back over his shoulder.

"I'M THERE, THOR!" he called, then, gently, "I'm there." He smiled.

He turned to walk towards the sea, where instead of stopping at the edge of the cliff, he continued, his feet seemingly stepping out onto air.

Thor stood, looking on, as his  brother's image faded, paler and paler, then burst again into vibrant  green crystals and gold tipped orbs, rising, up, up and up,   spreading out into the darkening sky, till the cloud of jewels lost   itself among the  stars

.--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Reference for old Norse funeral prayers: http://www.angelfire.com/folk/oldways/norseprayer.html

[sparklegemstone]

Endgame speculation post

Just for fun-sies, this is me placing my bet about some things I think we are most likely to see in Endgame from the lens of an optimistic Loki fan.  I would have lost all my hypothetical money for Infinity War, so I’m not exactly on a winning streak, but that’s okay.  Let’s see how wrong I am this time :-D.

Below the cut is based on leaked set photos that have been out for many months.  I do not know about any new spoilers that have come out in the last couple weeks.

1) Endgame is going to re-frame and put in a new light or change the significance by adding context to things we’ve seen in previous movies.  Loki’s death scene?  We’re getting more insight into why that was weird (Thor and Loki dropping off-screen while the Hulk fought, Loki’s carefully chosen last words).  There is more to this.

2) The Loki we saw at the beginning of IW had special knowledge due to time travel shenanigans.  I don’t know if he actually met the Avengers from Endgame or whether some info from the future was passed to him somehow, but he knew more than was made apparent.

3) Eh, this is basically a specific instance of #1, but I’m giving it its own number anyway.  We’re getting a lot more context about what the relationship between Loki and Thanos was leading up to or during The Avengers as well as learning more about Loki’s motivations (possible influence from the mind stone, etc.).  It’s a case of the present Avengers having always thought Loki was just evil and now they are forced to reconsider what they thought they knew (which also applies to the general audience for these movies that haven’t picked apart Loki’s character journey like we have).  I am SO EXCITED to see more of Avengers!Loki than what we originally got.

As far as when/how we’ll find out about Loki’s fate, for this I don’t have strong intuition.  Maybe the (Revengers - Loki) go to Valhalla or Hel and find them there and bring him back, maybe they just say hi to Frigga w/o Loki there who drops a leading but ambiguous hint that is resolved in Loki+.  I would say Loki’s fate is more likely to be resolved in Endgame since it is wrapping up 10 years of movies and the ongoing infinity gauntlet related plot threads, of which Loki was a big part of that, but they have so much story and so many characters they have to serve, I can also see them deciding to offload the resolution for Loki’s character to Loki+ as well.

[archived-fic-writing-fandom-blog]

Do you have any high school au headcanons for Marvel characters?

I am basing these on personalities. Their likes and dislikes and any quirks I’m aware they have, etc.

Steve:

Pre serum:

Would have tried out for the wrestling team. Might have made it if the coach took pity on him. He had the skill but not the strength. His mom would be reluctant to even let him try, considering all the health issues he has. 

Post Serum:

All American boy. Football. Baseball. The lovable jock everyone wants to be friends with. He isn’t the arrogant stereotype. He also doesn’t give a damn about cliques and will sit at any table and make friends with anyone.

James Buchanan “Bucky” Barnes:

Bucky is a goth. He’s the bad boy who is secretly a teddy bear. His prosthetic arm wouldn’t be super advanced and so this would limit him in some ways but you bet your ass he’d have a sweet guitar and a beautiful motorcycle. He is best friends with Steve cuz they grew up as neighbors.

Tony Stark:

Computer nerd, as well as a science tech nerd. But not the ironed shirt with pocket protector type. No. He is the hot nerd. The nerd everyone underestimates cuz he’s pretty. He is cocky and confident. He wired the whole computer lab and teaches the teachers how to use their machines. He wears band tees.

Bruce Banner:

Science lab nerd. May have a pocket protector but only on his lab coat. He’s a sweater vest kind of guy. Always a little disheveled but the girls dig him. He is a little insecure and has a slight temper problem. His home life is a little rocky but he is best friends with Tony and spends a lot of time at his house.

Natasha Romanoff:

Also a goth. She’s the quiet brooding type who everyone is afraid of. She’s the 80s revival type with wacky hair and lots of fishnet, leather, piercings, and chains. Everyone wants to both be her and do her. Her friends circle is very small but she gets along with everyone on this list even if they don’t quite know what to make of her. Getting her to smile makes you feel like you’ve won a million bucks. Her past is dark and she was adopted when she was younger. She still remembers her old name and will still answer to it. [It’s similar enough to her now legal name that it’s almost comical. Her closest inner circle, people she knows from her neighborhood, knows this name and sometimes calls her by it. (Natalia Romanova)] her adoptive parents knew her birth parents and adopted her when her birth parents were killed for political reasons while visiting their native Russia. Nat is a US citizen, since she was born here.

Clint Barton:

No matter what incarnation of Clint he is, he will always don a bow and arrow and drink coffee by the pot. There’s even one in the teachers lounge with his name on it. Ask him who his best friend is and he will tell you “My dog, Lucky… and Nat” always in that order. Nat has no idea that she knows more about Clint than anyone else he associates with. She is convinced either Tony or Bruce is his best friend. 

Thor:

Plays football with Steve. They are best friends on the field but he parties too much for Steve to feel comfortable hanging out for long periods of time outside of school. He’s the kid who keeps everyone smiling with a kind word and a smiling face. “Hey you wanna smoke this with me?” “No thanks” “I didn’t think so but I figured I’d offer” is literally how he lives his life. Always willing to share even if he knows the answer is no. Never ever pressures anyone to do anything but always asks in case they change their mind. He isn’t a one woman kind of guy and has a few girls in rotation who all know about each other and are close friends. It’s almost like they are his groupies. He is a jock but he’s also the stoner hippie. And it’s a weird combo that works for him. 

Loki:

Another goth kid. Bordering on emo. He makes straight A’s and is the prankster. No one knows how he’s even passing because he never appears to do any work.  Not everyone likes his antics and he is only close to a small handful of people. None of which goes to his school. They are all in the neighborhood he grew up in but moved from before high school started. They, of course, are the rival high school. 

Peter Parker: 

Eh. Same as the current canon Peter. This doesn’t change in the AU. Just maybe his circle of friends is bigger because of Bruce and Tony taking him under their wings since they are seniors and he’s a freshman. 

Sam Wilson:

Sam is in ROTC and has been since it was first offered in middle school. He enjoys himself in this. Keeps trying to recruit Steve and Bucky. Considers them his best friends. You’d think he and Bucky hate each other but their relationship is that of like comedian roasting his best friend celebrity at his birthday bash. They love each other but they give each other shit and it’s hilarious. 

Rhodey:

Rhodey is the ROTC leader. He’s the teacher who runs this program and everyone loves him. 

Happy:

Is the assistant principal. Practically keeps the place from falling apart. 

Nick Fury:  

Principal. Loved by everyone. Takes no shit. Thinks Bucky and Sam’s antics are hilarious. Doesn’t much care for Loki’s pranks.

Maria Hill: 

Is in ROTC with Sam and is technically his commanding officer. She will never admit it but she often parties with Thor. At school and ROTC events she is strictly by the books and takes her rank seriously.

Pepper Pots:

Long time girlfriend of Tony Stark. She is in with the Beatniks. Into poetry slams and creative writing. Is almost as smart as Tony and keeps him on his toes. He wouldn’t be organized at all if it weren’t for her. 

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