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fuckyeahisawthat · 2 months ago

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Re-skimmed through a bunch of Dune Messiah last night because why not and now I am having thoughts:

The thing that sticks with me most is the tone. It's melancholy, it's eerie, it's unsettled and weird. Cannot think of a more pitch-perfect director for it than Denis Villeneuve. He's gonna nail it.

There is...not that much...actual story? Denis has referred to it in interviews as "a small book" and I'm like my guy it is 350 pages. But there are actually not that many plot beats. It's just that every. single. scene. is WILDLY overwritten. The real challenge of adapting Dune is not the giant worms or the dense complicated worldbuilding or the fact that actors have to say the name "Duncan Idaho" repeatedly with a straight face. It's that there are pages and pages and PAGES of internal monologue that have to be externalized somehow for film.

After a re-skim my gut instinct for "how much story goes in a feature film" is that if you just wrote out the dialogue and action that happens in every scene in the book in screenplay format you'd end up with...maybe about an hour of material? Which is great, actually, because it means there is room to add stuff. Like a whole new independent plotline for Chani if they decide to do that.

It may seem insane to add things to an adaptation of what's notoriously one of the wordiest series in classic sci-fi but it's worth remembering that they added quite a bit to Dune Part Two. Most of the first hour of the movie--almost everything before the worm ride except for Jessica drinking the Water of Life--is stuff that isn't in the book. And it's the best part of the movie essential to making the movie work as well as it does. Yes, they also cut elements from both parts (the dinner scene, the whole plotline where Gurney thinks Jessica is a Harkonnen spy, Thufir Hawat's fate, Leto II the Elder, murder toddler Alia) but I understand why each of those elements was cut or changed in the service of cinematic storytelling.

There's an interview (can't remember which one) with Jon Spaihts, the other co-writer of the scripts along with Denis, where he talks about how Dune is like a stage play, with so many of what would be the big action set pieces happening off-page. I kept thinking about that comparison while reviewing Dune Messiah because in addition to the scenes that do exist being wordy and internal as fuck, an absolutely insane list of major events/reveals/emotionally significant moments happen off-page. The list of things that we don't actually see in the main action of the story, that we're only told about after they happen, includes:

Chani finding out Irulan has been secretly dosing her with birth control for YEARS

People trying to capture a sandworm and take it off planet

Chani and Paul finding out Chani is pregnant after 12 years of trying to conceive

Paul flying an ornithopter carrying his extremely-about-to-go-into-labor partner while blind

CHANI DYING (first time reading I did NOT know this was coming and damn near threw my Kindle across the room at the way the information was delivered)

Alia executing a bunch of people including a Bene Gesserit Reverend Mother

Paul walking into the desert at the end

You could add all these moments into a scene-for-scene film adaptation of the book and probably still have room to add more material.

The other thing that jumps out is that Paul doesn't really...govern...much. Like there's this whole subgenre of post-Dune/Dune Messiah-era fic that's just some combination of Paul, Chani, Irulan and sometimes Feyd traipsing around the palace having feelings while vague politics happens in the background, but I forgot that Dune Messiah is actually kinda like that??

There is a whole thread of Paul feeling kind of abstractly bad about being Space Hitler but he does not, in fact, actually do anything about it. And like yes both bureaucracies and religious movements can grow to have a life of their own that seems beyond the control of any one person. But also my dude you are the Emperor of the Known Universe. Someone is signing those space checks for the Endless War budget. You are not powerless here.

The one thing that really, clearly drives Paul to actively do things in the plot is not feeling guilty about having unleashed catastrophic religious war on the universe. It is protecting his family. Chani, Alia, his unborn children, and you could probably throw in Duncan by the end. That is what motivates him to act at key moments, and to want to hold on to power. And hey, y'know, if I'd experienced almost everyone I'd ever known getting murdered in a single night, I would probably get a bit intense about that too! It makes sense from a character point of view!

I'm very curious to see how these threads interweave with each other in the film, because the Villeneuve films put a lot of emphasis on Paul's agency and the fact that he may be constrained by shitty circumstances thousands of years in the making, but he still makes choices within that context. I can't see the narrative allowing film!Paul to get away with the same Poor Little Dictator routine as in the book. There are a few ways they could play this but I think the most interesting one is kinda the way they started going at the end of Part Two. Which is that as soon as you start reaching for that kind of power, then power becomes its own end and you will end up doing increasingly horrific things to maintain it. I think it would be quite interesting if the film shows us Paul not just being like "woe is me" but actively choosing to make the world worse because his trauma-driven fear of losing the people he loves makes him cling ever more desperately to power for its own sake.

If they went this route I think it would make Paul's decision at the end hit even harder. FWIW I actually really like Paul walking off into the desert at the end of the book. I think it brings things full circle with his relationship to the Fremen and creates this beautiful arc going back to the duel with Jamis. He first won a place among the Fremen through respecting their customs even though he really did not want to fight and kill someone he had no beef with. And by respecting the Fremen custom of the blind walking off into the desert, he proves himself to be fully Fremen and protects his children not by making them heirs to the throne but by making them Fremen.

And yeah, to a modern audience here on Earth it can look like "Paul conveniently fucks off and doesn't have to raise his newly-motherless children." And we can have a whole discussion about the unexamined ableism of the idea of someone who's gone blind voluntarily choosing death so as to "not be a burden" on their community. But neither of those readings is really the point here. Within the logic of Fremen cultural values, where the survival of the group as a whole is more important than the life of any one individual ("your water belongs to the tribe" etc.) Paul's choice is a willing and intentional self-sacrifice (see also: fedaykin) that wins him huge respect. There's a line in the book about Paul that's like "He would be one of them forever now" and damn if that didn't give me shivers. Like!! The political-symbolic implications!!! Which maybe I'm particularly attuned to because I just wrote a whole fic about what does it mean for an outsider to become Fremen but hmm something something Paul's final* act not being an exercise of Imperial power but an expression of kinship with an oppressed group and that being the thing that's needed to keep his family safe even if he is not physically present with them...IT IS RICH SYMBOLIC TERRITORY.

(*Yes yes I know about events in the next book. Shush.)

This kind of stuff is why I tend to think Chani may start out in a very different place in the story but the end will still be pretty close to what's in the book. It's too thematically powerful and tragic to go any other way.

But also...if they change things around enough that she is still alive at the end of the movie...I won't be sad about it.

#dune #dune messiah #story structure #adaptation #paul atreides #chani kynes #umm #dune messiah spoilers #i guess??#is this really necessarily for a 55 year old book idk

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jthmaaucomic · 11 days ago

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YAY I’m finally fucking hoooome and now I can blabber my mouth off.

SO TECHNICALLY, this wasn’t the end of the chapter, but I’m still figuring out the pacing to everything and I realized there’s a lot im going to have cut or move around. Honestly, this has been such a massive but intensely rewarding challenge. I did NOT expect to draw everyday, I wasn’t even planning on it but I just enjoyed working on it so much that I couldn’t help myself.

But of course now I’ve pushed myself a little too much so im pretty tired and my head is full of nothing but a bunch of tiny psychos. I think I need a small break and for once, actually feel good about it because, if I’m being honest, I could probably crank out another two or three pages if I really felt like it.

I just want to make sure I’m on the right track though so I’m gonna take the week off to kinda go over everything I’ve made so far and reread my script, maybe catch up on some Zim episodes because hehehehehe its coming sooooooooooon.

But really I just want to thank everyone who’s been reading and sharing their thoughts on it. Like, it really means a lot, this comic is kind of my weird love letter to the fandom, for everything it’s helped me get through. So, I hope its kept in mind that I know lines can easily be crossed with the subjects im going to be sharing with this story, but absolutely none if it comes with the intention of wronging others or glorifying what shouldn’t be. It’s more like, stress relief, for people who can’t find it in their everyday lives, and want to escape to a place where it’s okay to let loose. If that makes sense.

Anyways, time to go, expect a lot of sketches this coming week, I might have to figure something out with the blog formatting cause idk, it’s already pretty cluttered. But I like to think that’s just part of the experience of it all lmao. I hope y’all have a wonderful night. Stay safe and don’t let them get you.

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nadianova · 5 months ago

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im sorry if anyones asked this before but! what's your process for planning out your vns? it might be too open-ended a question but playing malmaid its clear that you have a lot of skill and really have the medium nailed, so like... what does your workflow look like? how do you piece together whatever beginning idea fragments you have into something so coherent and well put together as this? what kinds of things do you prioritize? have you written about your process before?

i should tag my shit better i had to scroll forever to find these

but uhhhhhh i think. i seriously think the biggest misconception is that i somehow know what I'm doing like consistently the moments that people like in my games are moments i wsnt even thinking about and instead i put my effort into some entirely dismissed location.

i dont know what im doing but if i am to point at a skill my skill is the fact that i can in fact complete games and that gives people an opportunity to enjoy them

if you go read my first vns you'll notice they are not malmaid but after having made so many its just helped me build a repertoire of scripting abilities and knowledge on how to express myself in a visual novel format.. ultimately i am kinda writing the same thing over and over again in my vns cause that's just what i like to do

so its just trial and error really while having fun with the process

but yeah theres two other links wheere itry to go in the details but everything is so vague and shifting i might be doing something entirely different for my next game I'm already learning that i HATE planning so much as I've done for NAOMIDA and i have way more fun just winging it like i did with hopeless junction and dddeviance

my notes are actually insane like

lmao

look at these are my current notes and starting baseline for my lina side story in my game

like srly i just throw shit in be it memes or tweets or snippets of my own thoughts i wrote half asleep at 4 am and then figure out the details later and when i feel like my story is clear enough in my brain from shit like this i just start writing it hopping from scene to scene usually writing the fun scenes first and then suffering when i gotta string everything together

#asked

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7-ferrets-in-a-coat · 2 months ago

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Posting the God in the machine draft/planning thing instead of leaving it in the dog, this ome goes out to You @teruuu

WARNING: Basically crackfic. Messy as Fuck.a bit long. The formatting is ass so i hope u can look past that

NOTE TO SELF Before Accessing boss fights Ludo would have to do some sort of Minigame to unlock the “fight” |||| Note nr2 , Ludo has been posting this "Arg” in bits on their channel, and it's bringing them attention Like One video per uhh Bossfight, with them not going too in depth really, they Do address that tho and mention they’re gonna be doing a full narrative video later on once they figure it out

Chapter 1. Start with Ludo just finishing editing, stirring and complaining about still having a small channel but being kinda meh about it, they appreciate the few first followers they already have. Establish the status quo and introduce the nerds. Something happens with the pc but don’t really explain it

Chapter 2. Narinder Introduces himself and tells the Lamb about what he needs from them and explains a bit.

Chapter 3. Ludo focused. Explore a bit what they’re thinking, how they’re feeling and what they plan to do to help Narinder. They already accepted the deal btw. At some point goatthew comes in and “forcefully” suggests an outing, maybe ice cream or an arcade or smth. (drew some gay shit for this)

Chapter 4. Her and Ludo are still out, and we get some goat thoughts. Maybe she started to notice they seem more down than usual, chalks it up as them being bummed about their channel still being quite small . She’s angry for them and deems it necessary to cheer ludo up by winning them a touy :3. Make this extra gay , Goat being all proud but also half ish being like “oh yeah no big deal but i got you a cutie pie :3 “ (Something something in the chapter she adds , mentally: “like you”) They go home and do their routine of cuddling as FRIENDS because they aren't in love at all and watching a movie till late, then going to sleep to their separate rooms

Chapter 5. Ludo wakes up, does their Morning routine, skipping cooking breakfast bcs they know the goat will bring them something , and almost on queue she enters their room with a yummy ass pain au chocolat. They start up their pc as they are munching, with Narinder expressing his disgust at the need to eat anything, and ludo rolls their eyes and opens their writing program, and start brainstorming ideas as to turn this all into an ARG because they don’t want anyone to panic about the murder ai. Narinder bothers them with a LOT of exposition but at some point they kinda tune him out and finally start writing and examining and all.

Pan to late evening and they're still working at it, whilst Narinder has resorted to just Staring at them, which is totally not freaking them out, so they get up all of the sudden and go to thew’s room, sit on their bed and just close their eyes, whilst Goatthew just looks back, smiles , and the continues filming whatever she was filming. After a good half an hour Ludo’s pc does a lotta noise, which Is Narinder complaining, so Thew turns to them and asks them about what the fuck that noise is , and their response is“Oh probably one of the arg vids i’ve been watching for this new project turned themselves on or smth,,” Whilst theyre totally chill about it but inside are dying

They bolt back to their pc, whilst groaning , and Narinder greets them as soon as they close the door behind themself. “Where have you been, Maggot. You aren’t here to relax, you are here to FREE. ME. You Better be done soon with whatever.. Script. You are working on. And start actually Working to freeing me By undoing these Fail Saves the Scientists Have set up to keep me limited.” “What do you mean by that? Fail saves?” Ludo asks. “They manifest themselves as. What you Fleshlings call Videogame Bosses I believe. Which is utterly Stupid, as any child with any cognitive skills could get past.” “... then why don’t you do it yourself?” Silence fills the room, besides the soft whirring of the pc fan. “YOU DARE QUESTION ME. YOU INSOLENT BEING.” Narinder’s voice is booming. “N..Not really? I’m just curious? I mean i suppose by defin-” Narinder raises his cloth (that functions as his hand, its kinda explained in the uhhh chapter 2 in his description) “You Won’t be referring to me with such a tone Ever again, Maggot. .. But I suppose It is because an external being has to get past the Fail Saves. For Extra security. They Knew I’d be capable enough to figure it out Myself if we excluded that factor.” Ludovico slowly nods along, as to not further anger the being. “You should get started on that, Flesh.” The lamb nods and moves to the monitor currently unoccupied by Narinder, in order to start attempting to figure out how to proceed.

Chapter 6. Medias res beginning of the chapter. We cut to the lamb, huffing and struggling to beat the Boss Narinder talked about. They have been at it for a whole day, it is now around 4am. Ludo is usually really skilled at video games, but they find themself in much more difficulty than they usually would, even when playing extremely difficult games. This Boss appears to be way more Dynamic, not actually having a pattern it follows, instead being completely chaotic, almost never repeating the same attack. “AUUUUHHRRrrr…. I’m SURE i almost had it..” “You did Not.” Ludo glares at the monitor Narinder is on at the moment. When they are met with an unamused stare from the being, Ludo sighs and turns back to their screen. Narinder suddenly hides,and Ludo barely has any time to process that , as their door swings open revealing Goatthew holding some bags of food (still gtta decide what ludo’s fave food is) “Hey nerd, ya haven’t eaten all day. I-” She comes in and sits on their bed. “-I Know you can get very into your projects, I understand that, but you gotta remember to eat buddy”. Ludo frowns, they hate making goatthew sad but can’t help it sometimes “I’m.. sorry Thew, i didn’t do it on purpose..” “I Know ludo, but you gotta take better care of yaself ! “ she pauses, gets up from the bed leaving the food bags there. She nears ludo and puts a hoof on their shoulder. “I.. worry about you if ya don’t. I want ya to be healthy , buddy.” Ludo stares at her, wordlessly admiring her, almost forgetting about the pang of guilt that assails them at the knowledge that Thew was really worried.

then they make out sloppy style /j (you fuckin wish huh)

Thew recognizes this as a sign of Ludo agreeing with her (which would be true, but also much gayer than what you believe, thew) and tugs lightly at their ear, smirking as Ludo lets out a huffed laugh “Come on Lu, let’s go watch one of your silly musicals whilst you eat your late dinner / Lunch or whatever.” She turns to walk away, being closely followed by Ludo “

You know Ludo is already a shortened version of my full name, right? Ludovico? Thew?” She barks out a laugh “Yeah i Know, it’s funny to shorten it even further”

Then Thew proceeds to pick up Ludo by their waist, hoists them up to their protests and immediately tosses them on the couch to the effect of turning Ludo in a giggling mess, andthen Goatthew proceeds to flop herself on top of them, careful to not put her full weight on them.

Little does she know Ludo wouldn’t mind that what who said that. (traduce this in Ludo catching themself thinking this and being flustered)

Small timeskip to like 8am, Goatthew still being awake, looking at Ludo sleeping peacefully. “what’s gotten you so invested this time huh buddy? It must be a really good one if you forget food a whole day… Works for me tho, I’ll just take care of you if you don’t.”

Chapter 7. Something something we go back to ludo finally defeating Leshy’s boss and start to write on their script, putting notes next to the script (“Phrase this and make it seem like this all is an obscure game related to the ARG or smth”)

Narinder insulting and demeaning ludo ensues.

After a small timeskip, its about lunch time and Thew burst in, Bringing ludo some food that they first thank her for and immediately dig into it, as Thew makes herself comfortable on their bed as she too eats her portion she brought with herself. They chat about how Goatthew’s video is going and whatever. An other cut,waylater into the night, with ludo grinding away af the heket boss, to which they’re actually having an easy time since Her boss Is way more Brute force centered and Ludo’s having a way easier time dodging attacks and countering and all. THey get it done after 2 more tries and raise their firsts up, almost Letting out a loud “WHOOP” but stopping themself as to not wake up Thew, who after they shared dinner insisted on staying in their room whilst doing something else to not go insane

(PARALLEL PLAY WHOOOOOO AUTISM WINS <3)

From here I'm gonna start writing JUST the premise of the chapters not in detail

Insert here the angst you have pretty much memorized atp, do it later tho (sorry i like. Forgot to write this one but ill link the art that is vased off of the idea. That i could write one day maybe.)

[Linked here]

Chapter.8

Goatthew Pov, Her taking care of Ludo for the time they require to recover, which is 3 days. notes on how the usual cuddles feel different, more somber but also way more intimate, somehow even more intimate than the literal usual. She has to fight off the urge to squeeze them and give them a forehead smooch a lot, because it just

Feels different.

Chapter.9

Ludo still kinda feels blegh but does have to fight the rest of the bosses to free Narinder. Somehow manages to actually first try Kallamar’s Buller Hell (because ofc he’d have a bullet hell)

Narinder Is pissy af and bragging or whatever but Ludo completely has him tuned out. They want to approach Shamura’s but also they are intimidated about the finalityof it all, what would happen after Shamura’s defeat.Ludo ends up beating Shamura After a few attempts, not as late as 3 am tho, like around uhhh idk, late afternoon???

Narinder Is very Happy, all ready to finally access his body and Pitches the idea to the lamb to go NOW to the science center. Ludo is against the idea, they want a break, so Narinder reluctantly agrees.

At dinner, whilst they sit on the couch and watch tv and eat, Ludo tells Thew abut what narinder said and She’s like “Idk buddy, this is getting really freaky and dangerous sounding,,” But ludo’s like Yeah but It’s gnna be such a good narrative.

Plus they want to pass it on as a urban explorer collab with Thew or smth.

Timeskip to tomorrow, they are now traveling to the uhhh lab area, with Narinder somehow transported into a uhhh key? those fuckin keys idk how theyre called and idc to like look it up rn AND they enter the building, , see a big pc litten up or smth and they look at each other, then plug the key in annnnd cut

Chapter 11

Maybe the finale? (write it down tomorrow)

It is way past tomorrow, writing time

OK SO I'm thinking. Narinder pops up on the screen briefly and Ludo looks at him

expectantly, awaiting a speech from the known monologuer (His ass LOVES

monologues) but instead he just cackles, cheshire smile wide spread and

disembodies himself.{"As they looked down to the left they saw a (insert thing here)"}

We pan to the uhh a capsule/box/whatever i don’t know as it twitches and slowly

comes to life, falling over and catching itself before it actually reaches the ground.

Whirring from the machine can be heard, as it hadn’t been perfected yet. Its robotic

arms not covered by the same protective shell that covers the rest of the robotic

body, wires tangling around the metal skeleton somewhat imitating vines.

An odd, gargled chuckle comes out of the robot’s speaker as it pushes itself up,

whilst the two flesh bipeds back off leaning against the wall, intimidated.

Narinder fully stands up now, he turns (slowly, dramatic ass bitch) to face the lamb

and the goat. “Fleshlings. I thank you for your service. You have aided me in finally

reaching my goal of having a body and Finally putting my extermination plan in

action.” He takes a step closer to the two, with Thew hugging Ludo protectively.

"However, despite how grateful I am-" Narinder's robot body looms over them. "I'm

afraid I cannot let you walk Free, your deaths will be Merciful though: Quick,

painless, and free of your Mortal sickness."

Ludo shuffles a bit, freeing themself from Goatthew’s grasp, putting themself in front

of her. “Wh wait hold on man, this? This wasn't part of the deal??-” They take a step

forwards, staring up at the Robot in an act of bravery (Or maybe foolishness would

be more correct)

I dont feel like going too much in detail rn actually this isn’t a problem for Now me !!

I’ll just write down the main beats

Ok so Narinder is like “Lol too bad actually. I do not care you will die here today

teehee” and goatthew is like Hell naw so she lunges at his ass and starts fighting

him, whilst ludo glances at her rq and their gazes meet and they wordlessly form a plan plan, with Ludo runnin back to the big pc and starting to analize it, trying to find a

way to suck narinder back into the enclosure and trap him on the internet again. SO

now i'm thinking some sort of Pony island inspired Bossfight, probs somethin like

uhhh Baalzebub in that game , so like his consciousness is divided between fighting

physically AND digitally. At some point Nari flings goatthew by the hand , with her

slamming against the wall. Ludo turns to the thud, worried expression on their

features, but quickly focuses back onto the pc.Narinder approaches slowly, armsLike this . Something something “ Stop fighting it lamb im gnna win, just give up and

accept ur fate” and ludo’s like HELL NA IM GOING TO KICK UR ASS So nari rushes

forwards, going to grab them by the scruff?Hood? whatever. But he stops, bcs he

heard some steps. “What are you doing, dear Narinder.” Its Shamura DUN DUN

DUUUN

“Shamura.” He hisses (because of the slightly defective robotics in his body)

“Narinder. Step back.” Heket says, lookin as menacing (and as handsome) as ever

(BUTCHES HEART HEART) (Sorry being sleepy makes me gayer)

Something something Shamura starts going on a rant about how they oh so cared

about narinder , like a brother, so nari interjects and is like “YOU WERE THE ONE

THAT IMAGINED IT ALL. YOU WERE THE ONE WHO FABRICATED THIS-” He

gesticulates angrily “THIS FAMILY FACADE. YOU NEVER CARED ABOUT ME

THAT WAY . ANd it doesn’t matter. It never did. You shall all die. You brought me into

this world and I will take You out of it.” and theres a scuffle, with Leshy tearing

Narinder’s protective plates off with his claws, Kallamar bringing out a taser and

hitting him with it, Heket coming in with a WICKED and RAD punch that dislocates

his maybe jaw???? And In the meantime Shamura rushes to Ludo’s side, Helping

them finally defeat the fuckin narinder boss and starting up the program to get outNarinder from his body. Narinder whizzes and buzzes, so in a desperate attempt he

lunges towards ludo and shamura, withered foxy style, but doesn’t get far bcs

Goatthew clutches and puts herself between the they/thems and decks his face ,

making him fall to the ground, and as he tries to push himself up, his

eyes/visor/whatever i come up with in the design turns off and he stills and falls over.

Ludo sighs and briefly leans over the desk, then immediately bolts to Goatthew and

hugs her hella tight and sobs or smth, and uhh they have a silent moment, the

scientists cooing at the display and then the moment is interrupted by the fuckass

cat, but this tim he has a smaller voice, so they look at the pc and they see he turned

into a way smaller and cuter version of himself, kinda like a Shimoji or smth and they

all cackle, whilst Shamura attempts to explain they did this real fast to finally make it

so bitch cant be taken seriously AND he is now tied to the pc he is in currently.

and BAM idk how to finish the chapter besides Ludo and Goatthew leaving and

waving at the scientists

Chapter 12/Prologue

oh my god!!! they are going to be happy???

I’ll come up with the prologue as its time comes

All i know is now ludo has a big channel as well, with the whole video abt the “ARG”

being the catalist of their fame, with both of them having decided to keep pretending

it was all an Arg, a very complex one tho.

and then uhh probably confession? like silly and awkward and its all fine tho because

they are so comfty with each other and they go on a cafe date and BAM DONE YURI

I am SO sorry about the shit formatting guys i really am

#long post #god in the machine au #goat x lamb #goat x lamb yuri #cult of the lamb #cotl narinder #cotl lamb #cotl goat #cotl heket #cotl shamura #cotl leshy #cotl kallamar #:3 #cotl au #all for ya teru #<- the (AUTISM WINS WHOOP) got them Real bad guys

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liverpool-enjoyer · 6 months ago

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Max! Can you please recc some pedrigavi fics? Xx

"max can you recommend some pedrigavi fics" MY BELOVED WUNGI YOU ARE ASKING IF THE POPE IS CATHOLIC!!!

best friend i truly think ive read every completed non smutty pedrigavi fic there is 😭😭 however i have this habit of not bookmarking shit so my memory is all i have to go off of lmao.

starting off strong w something written by MY GOAT is i'm stupid for your love by the bestest, @tl-trashtalk. tell me rn that theres anything more romantic than dedicating a goal to someone. i'll wait. very cute very fluffy. what more could you want.

another one i wanna recommend is 10 Firsts by OsByLynn. i read it almost a year ago so my memorys kinda fuzzy but i remember it being rlly cute!!! its a buncha firsts for the couple, like first kiss, first ily, etc n its SO sweet n fluffy n adorable. plus theres a WEDDING n i am a SUCKER for weddings. i'd argue all fics should have a wedding. every single one.

another fic i wanna mention is i know my pain is such an imposition by aesthetes. it follows gavis recovery, n again i wanna reiterate that i havent read it since it came out in december so my memory is KIIIINA ass but i remember it being SUPER sweet. plus the title is a taylor reference so. immediate brownie points.

oh n i GOTTA MENTION Promise me? by Jellyyfree. it features ace gavi n yall KNOW how much i love ace gavi. the projection goes crazy w this lil guy.

my baby here on earth, showed me what my heart was worth by nehvermind is jus so cute. the boys are so in love n they have the cutest lil first kiss. feels very nervous, all-consuming teenage romance. well not that i would know. but probably.

OHMYGOSH i jus GOTTA mention Days When You and I by @itsjustthatfics. ohmyGOSH i could wax poetic abt this fic all day. EASILY one a my favorite pedrigavi fics. the story is so well written n cute n funny n the format oh the FORMAT. its in a script / screenplay (idk if those are interchangable so film majors pls forgive me) format n i LOVE it since i like,,, visualize things in my head as a movie?? if that makes sense?? anyways yeah mandatory pedrigavi reading.

would you still love me? by arianagrandebrainrot is v funny n v cute. revolves around an important, relationship make-or-breaking question. feels like a conversation these two would have.

oh n as an obligatory plug theres my fic i want to be loved (not to be touched). but if we're being honest w ourselves this is less pedrigavi n more gavi being sad while simultaneously being in love w pedri.

ok i think thats it. its late n im v tired. thank you SOSOSO much for this ask tho wungi cause i can talk abt pedrigavi for BREAKFAST LUNCH N DINNER.

#IF PEDRIGAVI HAS ONE FAN ITS ME!!! (says a woman whos written one (1) pedrigavi fic)#ty for the ask <3 #gavi #pablo gavi #pablo martín páez gavira #pedri #pedri gonzalez #fcb #barcelona #fc barcelona #spain nt #pedrigavi #wungi

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spampai · 6 months ago

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Talk Your Way Out! (Cancelled…)

Well, not exactly…

Prologue Part 4: Queen’s Pursuivants.

Well yeah I knew this was coming-NUH UH THAT AIN’T MY PLAN-

Yeah so I realized that this project ain’t going well, considering the fact that:

1. The script is very messy. YEAH I placed so much good ideas for the upcoming chapters but it feels like it was smooshed in and not well explained. The timeline isn’t explained as well, seeing that people didn’t notice the timeskip between Part 1 and Part 2.

2. The characters are not well put out. I didn’t really explain why they were acting out of character and the readers can’t symphatize well with these characters as they don’t know what the purpose of the scenes are for. Characters are out of character for no reason as I didn’t delve into that until further chapters, which in this case will still make people confused. They can act like they are, but I gotta give an explanation for it, which I failed to do in the current prologue.

3. Many people find it confusing rather than enjoyable. I’ve received lots of feedback on how it was ordered or how the story flows. Basically responding to the feedback and thinking about it more; ya, it is confusing the more I reread it. So yeah, that’s one of the reasons.

4. The execution isn’t as great as I thought I did. People got confused between chapters ‘cause the thought bubble wasn’t really recognizable (my indescribable art is pouring towards the story plotline ☠️). Some scenes are also not portrayed well as I lack the ability to show their positions on where they’re at or what situation they’re in (still kinda bad with that atm, will change soon). Expression and dialogue-wise it’s fine, but I didn’t like how I was using similar formats for the panels or some expressions seemed repetitive. Same goes for the speech bubbles. I still like the dialogues tho.

5. Not much recognition. Ya okay this is probably the least important part of what I want from this project. Yeah okay I admit it that’s also a reason I stopped this project. From the first part to the two other parts, it stopped getting that much attention and I felt like there’s something that’s making people lose interest. I spam reblog as a result, which I regret doing. This is why I even thought about ‘cancelling’ the project.

6. Wrong timing. Always posting it on dead hours, or when the fandom ain’t active. Too impatient, pretty sure. I promote it way too much with spam reblogs, which I still regret.

I changed my reasoning from ‘likes and reblogs will make me famous’ to ‘I need this community to provide feedback so I can improve myself as I grow and eventually get accepted in the ‘big artists’ community from now on.

I’m learning from my mistakes, and basically something for me to experience so I wouldn’t repeat again. So at the moment, it is cancelled…

BUT.

I never said it was cancelled with a period ;)

Stay tuned for my next few posts as it’ll revolve around this situation :))

While waiting, have some scenes of the aforementioned Part 4. I specifically like this part ‘cause I think it potrays these two a lot better, I just didn’t explain why Toadster was acting the way he is, which is repulsive and mean. I’ll be explaining that in my next few posts (No, I don’t ship them btw, I rarely ship characters unless it’s canon in the lore).

As for the deleted posts this morning, I figured it wasn’t the best time to post it, so expect it when the fandom is active again. See ya!

#Talk Your Way Out!#announcement #cancelled project #art #fanart #small artist #traditional art #garten of banban #garten of banban fanart #garten of banban manga #garten of banban comic #artists on tumblr #bittergiggle #bittergiggle fanart #sheriff toadster #sheriff toadster fanart #manga #manga panels

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envy-of-the-apple · 23 days ago

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When you said quotev I was like "the X reader quizzes website??? Nah...." and then it was

You're so brave for that tbh, but how do you do it?? Isn't the interface kinda bad for long texts?

it wasnt that bad tbh. and quotev has an actual novel writing space so i used that NOT the quizzes layout. i just rlly like the layout of it. idk how to explain it but it feels less...cramped compared to google docs? its like a step down from campfire writing

the saving system isnt all that bad too! honestly whenever i want to swtich from pc to mobile i can and like 9/10 times my latest draft is on there. lately for some reason quotev will glitch on me and itll scrub like the last few paragraphs of whatever ive written. i think its more of my laptop than anything else tho

I used to write on Google docs but I never liked the way it would transfer over to ao3. Quotev kept the same formatting and I won’t have to reread a 6k word fic for messed up italics. Buuuut now I’ve discovered a script that Google docs has that’ll just keep the formatting for me so I’m pretty much switching back over now lolol

#asks

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slasha482 · 1 year ago

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Fizz and Ozzie Story Ideas

You know, I have tons of ideas for stories between Fizz and Ozzie, but sadly I’m not a good writer. I´ve tried before to write fanfiction for other fandoms, but I always end up discarding what I’ve written (I can write in script format no problem, but prose has always been difficult for me). So I decided I’m gonna write down these ideas in here, in case I eventually make them comics, or for anyone who likes them and decides to make their own stuff based on these!

Ozzie has a fight with another Sin (probably Mammon) and comes home hurt, so Fizz takes care of his injuries. Ozzie could have win the fight, lose it, or the fight could have ended up in a tie.

A gang attacks a place where Fizz is currently in, and in the commotion, one of them manages to rip one of Fizz’s prosthetic bases (you know, the things that are attached to his torso and leg stumps that make it possible for the arms and legs to connect to his body) and Fizz gets severely hurt. Ozzie then appears to beat the shit out those guys and take Fizz to a hospital.

Fizz defends one of his younger fans from some asshole drunk adult (the adult could be berating the kid or trying to hurt them).

Fizz gets hit on by a very pushy guy, and Ozzie is NOT happy about the situation.

(This one is more of a what-if scenario after Fizz has already quit from Mammon’s contract) Fizz realizes that Mammon and Buckzo conspired to keep him and Blitz apart all those years ago. Fizz is devasted and Ozzie consoles him. (There could be a bonus scene where Fizz breaks the news to Blitz and they both have to comfort each other. Blitz could also bow to somehow get back at them.)

Ozzie and Fizz go to one of Beelzebub’s parties and they hang out with Bee and Vortex.

Ozzie is left furious after a meeting with someone and only Fizz can help him calm down.

Ozzie is about to get hurt by an angelic weapon but Fizz takes the hit for him. Fizz is severely injured but, after a lot of time, he manages to recover (there could be a bonus scene of Blitz visiting Fizz in the hospital).

Stolas feels extremely insecure about his relationship with Blitz, so Fizz appears to tell him that while, it is true that Blitz is an idiot in denial, he does care for Stolas, and not to give up on him just yet.

Ozzie decides that, to keep his grimoire safe, he’ll give it to Fizz. Fizz feels that he is not the ideal person to have such a big responsibility, but Ozzie reassures him that there is no one he trusts as much as him.

Ozzie gives Fizz an Asmodean crystal to use in case of emergency.

Fizz and Blitz get roped in to a fight while hanging out, and Fizz uses one of the spells in Ozzie´s grimoire to help Blitz fight (I’m not sure what kind of spells his grimoire could have, but maybe some fire attacks?).

Loona calls Fizz to help her with a particularly drunk Blitz after he spirals into one of his self-hatred bouts (I imagine than in this scenario, it’s kinda already established that Fizz is like Loona’s uncle).

That’s all I have for now, but if I get more ideas, I’ll write a part 2! If anyone feels inspired by any of these ideas, feel free to use them in your writings/drawings! And tag me if you do! I would love to see what you do.

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nhaneh · 2 months ago

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Looking at all your programming posts, I don't even want to ask you when you sleep, because I feel like you don't. Rather, what I want to ask is where do you get extra ten hours per day.

This is very funny to me because the truth is I actually sleep a whole lot? I've been having chronic fatigue issues since a year or few before the pandemic hit so I'm generally always kind of tired, and my periods of activity are often punctuated by just going to sleep for 1-3 hours afterwards. Like, I currently work 5 hours a day for 3 days a week, and the first thing I do when I get home after work is sleep. Then on the fridays after my three day work week I typically sleep something like 12 hours or more because at that point I'm just deceased, a literal zombie with a hunger for naps instead of brains.

So no extra hours here I'm afraid! I also don't really get anywhere near as much done as it might sound like?? My brain just overthinks everything all the time and so I'll spend a week or few idly thinking about stuff like optimizing a blitting routine or doing FFXIV an outfit mashup or gpose or doing some electronics or retro computer project or the like, occasionally looking things up online or such to feed the rampant trains of thought and then maybe eventually reach a point where I somehow manage to condense all of that down to something that actually kinda works over one or more periods of a few hours.

Like, as much as I occasionally talk about the whole doing 8-bit indexed palette graphics in software over Windows GDI thing, I actually still haven't really gotten around to doing proper functional triangle drawing yet because I keep distracting myself with other stuff like SIMD tile blitting instead of getting around to figuring out how to best do bounds checking for fast bresenham lines in a way that also allows for filling the pixels in between them through integer linear interpolation. And instead of doing that, I'm distracting myself by thinking up ways to write a python script for converting 32-bit ARGB .png files to some kind of simple binary 8-bit colour format consistently, which in turn means thinking up structs to define the layout of the binary file headers and so on.

all while I still also have plenty of work to do at, well, work, haha.

honestly I wish I had an extra 10 or more hours a day - I constantly feel like I'm barely getting anything at all done because everything takes too much time to do and I just never seem to have enough energy for barely any of it.

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velnna · 1 year ago

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This might sound like an odd question but I’m planning on making my own comic at some point and I was wondering if you had any advice? Specifically in making the plot, deciding what each character does and maybe panel/page composition and how to make harmonious colour palettes?

Also one more question but when you were at the beginning of developing Stray Souls did you post little lore/plot snippets and character doodles/info or did you mainly wait until the comic was out?

(Sorry I know this is a lot but I was just wondering sort of what your process is because everything seems so seamless and well-put-together :> )

Ehh first of all the seamless and put-togetherness is an illusion 🫠

A lot of my work is built organically (fancy way of saying I just sorta wing it) and very dependent on what makes me excited at each given point. Generally, I come up with an idea for a character or a plot point and from there start branching out.

Say, I create character A. A needs a story so I create some beats for them, a beginning-middle-end type thing. While thinking of this, characters B, C, etc pop up as placeholders/devices for A's story, and the world gets shaped around it as well. Then suddenly something in the world gets decided that in turn changes A's story a little, and so on. Then I go into B, C, etc and do the same thing (build a story, let it bleed into the world and let the world bleed into it).

There's pros and cons to this sort of thing of course. Most of the time I over-develop characters or world bits that are completely unnecessary and clutter the narrative (especially when it's something like a comic, where things need to be explained visually and economically), and because of this sort of chaotic process I also tend to get entangled in my own concepts and lose track of my main threads. I don't dislike it entirely so it's just a matter of figuring out what works best for your own goals and processes.

Some general advice for comics that I've learned from trial and error: try stripping your story down to its bare bones and see what you absolutely need VS what's there for flavour or added context. Only add flavour once you're sure you can tackle the minimum, both in writing and artwise. Keep your character designs simple if you value your hands lol. It's fun to design complicated details but you WILL get tired of drawing them after a while. Sometimes it's ok to tell and not show 🤷‍♂️ if you're a one-man team sometimes you just gotta bite the bullet. Bear in mind that long stories will take YEARS to complete in comic format. Not an end all be all, but you do need to think about that. Also just go for it once you've got a structure you feel good about. I personally don't like over planning and don't even script things, so I don't think you need to have everything on paper before getting some chapters rolling. Most of what I've learned about comics has been making them, not thinking about making them. Oh, and readers tend to be more lenient than we give them credit for - if you're passionate enough about your world or characters, chances are at least some people will be interested regardless of whether you think art or writing are up to par

As for the other question, I spoiled the shit out of stray souls before launching it and still kinda do it for fun LMAO. Nothing too serious ofc but I've always loved giving people an insight into characters and world outside of the comic since the comic itself is a little peek into the whole thing. It also kinda serves to keep people interested imo

And I just can't keep my mouth shut about my stories lol

#q&a

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pink-gladioli · 8 months ago

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so uh im kinda gonna try to rewrite nexo knights (don't expect it to be good i am not a writer) but like i wanted some inspo from the community on what the format should be

like would y'all like it to be in a script format or more traditional story bookish? im gonna do third pov because i feel like that would allow me to better change from scene to scene and character to character. should we be able to hear certain characters thoughts?

any suggestions are welcomed!!

#nexo knights #lego nexo knights

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rustic-space-fiddle · 1 year ago

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Lil rant (MAYBE PJATO SHOW SPOILERS?)

Lots of opinions up ahead so uh, look out.

I’m watching the PJATO show and I really love some parts. The casting—they’re all wonderful (literally everyone, Mr D is hilarious) and any fears I had have been quelled because they’re all amazing and the trio fit their characters well (even IRL and they’re so precious). Camp Half Blood — so well done. The cabins are huge, the colosseum is just what I imagined, and they really did great on making it properly large and vibrant. I love it. Some of the extra beats they’ve added to make it better expanded beyond the strictly Percy POV in the book have been good. Annabeth and Grover chucking Percy into a fountain to try to heal him was hilarious and totally in character—probably my favorite part so far. Also: AHHHH SEAWEED BRAIN!

But is anyone just feeling… like the pacing is super slow? Like I get that us “zoomers” have tiny attention spans and stuff but “The Horse and His Boy” was my favorite Narnia book and I read LOTR when I was 11 so I don’t think my attention span is quite so bad. These kids got ADHD and it feels like every talk and every scene just drags. Every time I think the energy is gonna rise, it gets smacked back down by lackluster scene climaxes. Again, I’m not trying to say we need more explosions or booms or arguments, just that I]it isn’t even remotely eliciting the same kind of goose-pimple/heart thumping moments I remember from the books. I reread them constantly and it’s always thrilling.

And the music… someone I was watching it with said it sounded like generic Marvel music, and they’re kinda right. I can’t remember a single note from the score at all, and I’m always listening to movie/TV scores because they’re like listening to the story in music format! PJATO’s score though? Can’t even remember it. I can’t remember any of it even being used in certain places. I thought they’d try to get older instrumentals to make it unique, like lyre AND electric guitar in the mix, but honestly I can’t even remember what it sounds like. That’s bad, right?

[[EDIT: I just looked up the score on Spotify and it was literally made by the people who did the “God of War” game score. There’s no freakin way this music is bad. I’m gonna listen to it alone later. Maybe it’s just set really low in the mix… ]]

The “death” of Sally Jackson was so lackluster. Just a standard medium long shot, can’t even remember if the music flourished or dropped or anything. Their acting was great, but it was framed so poorly that it just felt… idk…

The pacing feels like it’s something I would do as an amateur who doesn’t yet understand how to edit on my first few write-up’s of a script. I’m not trying to be mean or unfair because I REALLY wanna love this show and I genuinely love a lot of stuff about it and I can tell that so many people are working so hard on it, but holy moly I feel my brain begging for someone to do something impertinent and just slap the show into a roll whenever I’m watching it.

There’s another issue I have with the timing of the most recent episode but I don’t wanna go much further.

Again, this is all opinion and not meant to say anyone shouldn’t like the show or that the people in it are stupid because they aren’t at all and people should like it! I’m just saying that as someone that really appreciated the pacing of the books (that was quick but never sacrificed the storytelling and slowed down when it needed to), I am really feeling that this show isnt shaping up like that. Additional note: I’m not even saying that the pacing of the show needs to BE the pacing of the books. I’m just saying that the pacing of the books is one of the things that made it so good and I really haven’t read many things with pacing of that quality.

Aaaanyway feel free to disagree with me or roast me alive. I just haven’t seen anyone talking about it and I wanted to rant a little and see what other people thought. I’m still gonna keep watching because I think if they can fix the pacing, imma really freaking enjoy this and in case they do, I don’t wanna miss it. And because I’d rather have more PJATO show than less!

#Rusty rants #pjato spoilers #pjato show #percy jackon and the olympians #mild spoilers #critique #please don’t hate me #Mr Riordan I’m sure everyone is trying their best #but this pacing is seriously gonna be the death of me #if I was 10 I would get bored and turn it off #I’m powering through because I love pjato and I wanna support this cast and the team’s hard work #long post #pjato

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thegreatobsesso · 10 months ago

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Hello my love! :D I keep seeing your spicy gay crime story on my dash and while taglists give me anxiety I am LIVING for it, so I thought I'd send you a random ask so you can gush about it some if you want. ^_^ Any fun facts? Was there a specific inspiration? Why script style? And anything else you'd like to share! 💕

AHHHHH!!!! Thank you for this, @pertinax--loculos!!! And let me begin by saying that I love your honesty. Everybody should engage with social media (and, situations permitting) life in general with the ways that give them the least amount of anxiety possible. I have my own particular tumblr-related anxieties as well as generalized social anxiety in just about every possible manifestation, so just to let you know, I feel you. 💙

That being said, THANK YOU FOR ASKING QUESTIONS! I logically know I can share this kind of thing without being asked, but without being asked, I pretty much won't. That's just how I'm built. 😊

Fun facts: Octavius was - originally - a drag persona of mine. As a cis woman who's always thought she looked incredible with facial hair, I invented a drag persona awhile back named Octavius Debonnaire. I fancied him a well-dressed British supervillain with a penchant for poisons and fancy suits. This was all well and good until one not-so-special day where he pole-vaulted into the realm of distinctly his own character that I could NEVER embody and had no choice but to write about instead. Things kinda spiraled from there, as they are wont to do. And now his last name became Sinclair, because Octavius Debonnaire is like.......... so exclusively a drag name it just doesn't translate outside that framework, lol.

Inspiration: The Insuppressible Callie Ray satisfied like, 90% of the narrative tropes that get me off. This WIP encompasses the remainder untouched upon. And, to be honest, I had to write a story without smut to convince myself I was ready to write a good story that comes with smut.

Why script? There's a couple reasons. Chief amongst them is that I knew I had two main characters (Milo and Octavius) and only one of them I was remotely interested from writing in the POV of (Milo).

To clarify, I love Octavius with my whole being. But there's something about writing from his POV that feels... uncomfortable? Counterproductive? It's hard to explain, but something very primal tells me that writing from inside his mind is the wrong way to go. And once I accepted that feeling, it was immediately clear to me that many, many things crucial to the plot of this WIP happen when Milo is not present.

I think at this point, I reached a critical crossroads where I realized I would either need to completely reimagine this WIP, or write it differently. And I thought of my bestie @i-think-im-so-so-but-cosplay, who is currently writing a WIP in script format, and the way forward was extremely simple.

[[ A clarification: I'm not saying scriptwriting is in any way "easier" than prose; it's a totally different animal for a totally different purpose. It turns out, this story is best represented as TV show, and maybe, just maybe, Callie might've been too, if I'd have been capable of conceiving such a notion at the time. The world will never know.]]

If I had any doubts in the beginning, they rapidly dissolved when I realized how ***freeing*** script format is. There's totally a trade-off - I think it's a lot harder to capture a character's deep internality or set a strong mood - but it lets me say, quite easily and simply, what happens. Not worrying about head-hopping is allowing me to actually tell this story the way it wants to be told.

One more consideration worth noting - my absolute favorite thing to write, and the thing that comes the easiest to me, is dialogue. Scripts are huuuuuuuuuge made of dialogue, so. Once I decided to try, it felt extremely organic, considering my writing strengths and preferences.

anything else I'd like to share: Aster Craine. My antagonist, to the degree to which she serves that role, although she might be more accurately called my foil. When I first started writing her lines she was totally one-dimensional and I had an idea of what role she would serve in the narrative and wrote lines that worked technically well enough, but my god. I've really been getting a grip on what she's about over the past few days and this is it:

What if the leader of an organized crime ring ran their business like a cult? What if, inspiring loyalty through fear, they used love? Or, a perversion of love - artificially produced positive feelings. What if people were loyal to her because they felt understood by her, seen, appreciated, taken care of?

It makes her a perfect foil for Octavius, who is a narcissist, unable to imagine what it would be like to be in someone else's shoes. Aster is an actual empath who can understand other people's emotions - she just uses that understanding to manipulate them into loving her and, in turn, doing absolutely anything she says.

This spark turned her into a character I rapidly became obsessed with developing, instead of just a cardboard cutout for my mains to bash up against, and that's a very, very happy feeling. :) :) :)

Thank you again for this ask, dear friend @pertinax--loculos! It provided me a way to put into words a lot of things that have rattling about in the old noggin 🥰

Ahh hell, I'll add my tag list... hopefully y'all aren't tired of me yet!

tag list: @winterandwords // @revenantlore // @space-writes // @indecentpause // comment to be added or removed!

#new WIP #WIP: spicy gay crime story #oc: octavius #oc: milo #asks #writeblr

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