#it could've been a lot worse
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
hydn-jpg · 1 year ago
Text
hello!! i am alive !!!!
how have y'all been? i've definitely been better lol
so... i can explain. or maybe not. i've never been good at talking about things but i'll do my best
under the cut bc a bunch of things happened and this'll probably be very long:
honestly where do i even start?
it has been a very rough almost month and a half for me, it was as if whatever god or entity out there went "lol wouldn't it be funny if we made this person go through several bad things all within the span of a few weeks" and then did just that
in early august i got a call from my mom that my grandmother had passed away. i had just gotten home from class at the time, but i immediately went out again and took the soonest available flight back to korea for her funeral. losing her hit me pretty hard honestly, she was the one i turned to when things were hard, and was also the only one who was generally supportive of my identity and sexuality. she didn't really get it, but she never made homophobic or transphobic comments, and was always kind and unconditionally loving. chuseok this year will be difficult without her around but at least she is in a better place i hope.
i took two weeks off from school to stay with my family after that. when i got back i was mostly catching up on all the classes i missed so i had very little time to do anything else. the stress coupled with all the physical exertion and everything else lead me to have the worst asthma attack i've experienced as of yet, it could've gotten a lot worse if it weren't for my kind neighbours who rushed to help me when they saw me struggling in the hallway
then in late august i got into a car accident. i was driving home from campus (which is an hour away), it was raining very heavily and i guess i lost control of my car. i am not sure what exactly happened honestly, one moment i was driving peacefully (and at appropriate speed for driving in the rain) and the next moment my car was spinning around and hitting the guardrails before crashing. it sounds cliché but everything was in slow motion and i literally saw my life flash before my eyes. i'm really thankful that the highway was basically empty, so no one else was affected. i somehow came out of the accident with only a concussion, a badly sprained arm and neck and some cuts and bruises. those will surely heal with time but the trauma of it will probably stay for quite a while.
so that's what happened. my mental health has not been great but i've been feeling a bit better lately! so that's good. i've been too physically, mentally and emotionally drained to do anything haha.
i probably won't be able to draw for a while thanks to my injury so you won't be seeing any art from me for at least another month or so,, to people i still owe commissions to, i will have to give you an IOU because again, i can't draw rn but also because i lost basically all the art that i haven't backed up during the crash, which unfortunately includes the commission sketches :( i'm so sorry, i'll redraw them as soon as i'm able to. i really wish procreate had an automatic cloud backup system so at least the sketches i did were saved but we can't always get what we want i guess,,
thank you to everyone who reached out and asked about my wellbeing and i'm really sorry for ignoring your messages and tags. i'll get to them as soon as i can!
tldr; my grandma passed, i had a bad asthma attack and i got into a car accident but i am okay. not really but i'll be okay maybe. lmao.
21 notes · View notes
watchmakermori · 2 years ago
Text
I decided to be very silly and keep rolling on the weapon banner. Got my mistsplitter in the end but 0/10 do not recommend
0 notes
lgbtlunaverse · 1 year ago
Text
I'm a little bit insane about how in novel canon the whole xiyao ending where Jin Guangyao wants to die with Xichen, who accepts, which then makes jgy change his mind and pushes him away at the last second isn't actually explicit. A lot of adaptations chose to make it so but in the novel this is all VERY up for interpretation.
Here's what actually happens in the text: Lan xichen stabs jgy, jgy moves away from lan xichen, xichen follows him, wwx realizes jgy is about to open the coffin and calls "watch out!" to lan xichen. Jgy unseals nmj, pushes xichen away, nmj kills jgy and they are both dragged into the coffin which is sealed again.
Here's what wei wuxian, our narrator, thinks is happening: Jin Guangyao wanted to lead lan xichen to his death out of revenge for stabbing him. Lan Xichen, unaware, simply followed Jin Guangyao to try and stop him from getting away. Wei wuxian's warning came too late, but Jin Guangyao- for an unknown reason- changed his mind at the last second and pushed lan xichen out of danger before lan xichen had any idea of what was going on.
Here's what most fans as well as the teams behind several adpatations think is happening: Jin Guangyao leads Xichen to nmj's coffin to die with him, Xichen accepts, because of this acceptance, proof xichen still cares for him, Jin Guangyao pushes him out of harm's way. Wei Wuxian just doesn't get that gay people who aren't him or Lan Wangji exist.
Here's what ALSO MIGHT BE HAPPENING: Jin guangyao wants to die in a different way than he is currently dying. Maybe he's afraid of what'll happen to his body after his death like he was scared for his mother's, maybe he wants to confront nmj one last time now that there's nothing more for him to lose, maybe - if he can't take her body with him- he'd at least like his final resting place to be where he buried his mother. Lan Xichen thinks he's trying to get away and follows but Jin Guangyao, who despite everything doesn't want him to die, pushes him away. Xichen doesn't know what happened until it's already happened. What he would've wanted if he had known remains up in the air.
Or, alternatively: Jin Guangyao's reasons are as above, but unbeknowst to Wei Wuxian, Xichen DOES know what jgy is about to do and either misinterprets this as an invitation to all die together, or inidividually decides he, too, is done, and wants to join his sworn brothers in the grave. To Jin Guangyao this has nothing to do with Lan Xichen, and he still doesn't want him to die, so he pushes him away against Lan Xichen's wishes.
Every single one of these interpretations is unhinged and they are all supported by the original text. It's like a choose your own adventure of tragic gay endings.
#mdzs#mdzs meta#meng yao#jin guangyao#lan xichen#nie mingjue#3zun#xiyao#rs: i wish it could've been you#honestly which is worse for xichen. Being denied his wish explicitly or only realizing he wanted it after it'd already been denied for him#OR genuinely not wanting to die but being forced to live with the fact that even after he essentially killed him jgy still saved his life#just another way he's in his debt#like no matter what he's not coming out of here okay#i switch between a bunch of these all the time but actually favor the last 2 because they're very underexplored in my opinion#I like it when 'i never even thought about hurting you' remains true to the bitter end. He never even considered it#also I just... have a lot of feelings about that being his mom's coffin#do you remember that in the novel the coffin was so heavy only sect leaders could bear the weight?#so for the burial a group of sect leaders had to be the pallbearers... the SYMBOLISM GUYS!! THE SYMBOLISM!#jgy dies in infamy but despite everything it's the highest of cultivation society who carry the coffin he's buried in#he's in the same coffin as a great sect leader!! As nmj!! After a whole life fighting an uphill battle finally in death they are equal#it's not justice and it's not fair but it's... something#wwx's interpretation is the one i favour the least. sorry bro you remain an unreliable narrator to me.#it feels rather uncharitable towards jgy which makes sense for wwx's pov but makes it not my favorite#there's an alternative version of that intepretation where jgy THINKS he's doing the coffin trio pact and thinks xichen accepts.#and has the same realization of oh no he still cares I don't want him to die and pushes lxc away#meanwhile lan xichen hasn't actually processed any of this because it all happened in about 0.4 seconds#i like that one slightly more but it's still not my favorite#there's tragedy in the misunderstanding but it's a bit convoluted.
201 notes · View notes
aeons-behind · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
critical role c3e90: a story told in captions
76 notes · View notes
duckdotimg · 5 months ago
Text
Tumblr media
Portrait of Cadence for @slugfishh for artfight!
42 notes · View notes
lesbianwithchainsaws · 2 years ago
Text
Gasleak year aside, I want to thank season 4 for giving us as much trobed content as it did. I mean, we got Jeff and Britta referring to them as boyfriends. We got Conventions of Space and Time. We got Basic Human Anatomy. We got the puppet episode and every post ever about it is just "yeah, Abed had a secret and he said he's in love with Troy". It showed that Britta and Troy didnt work as a couple and broke them up. We got "you were out there and you weren't looking for me?". It was trobeds season
444 notes · View notes
sciderman · 7 months ago
Note
Sometimes i remember a comics moment i randomly came across somewhere, where Sam Wilson mentiones a musical and Steve Rodgers says he doesn't like musicals, to whitch Sam goes "Guess that means you really are straight" and even tho i don't care about Cap America or the Avengers, the moment stuck in me for that quote by Sam. And like....Sci, any ideas if straight men actually don't like musicals or is that bullshit?
actually i think i know more gay men who hate musicals than i know straight men who hate musicals. i've had a drag queen stop me point blank when i was about to sing a barbra streisand song, and i know so many gays who pointedly hate abba. so based on my experience i think the inverse is true. most of the straight men i know are kind of impartial about musicals, but gay men? hate.
my theory is that a lot of gay men don't want to fall into stereotypes, maybe. but thaaaaat's just a theory! a gay theory.
#sci speaks#i'm trying to understand the gays. they are a mystery to me.#i've seen a lot more toxic masculinity coming from gay men than i have from straight men.#i think it makes sense. they have less women in their lives. so they reckon with a lot more masculinity. more dick measuring.#also gay men have some of THE most unhealthy romantic relationships i've ever seen in my life.#this isn't a blanket statement on everyone but just from what i've seen. it's such a strange pattern i've observed.#lesbians? healthy. straights? usually healthy. gay men? universally a tire fire that makes me say “if you hate each other so much ??”#“why are you together??????????”#i have never met a cis gay mlm couple in real life that was healthy. every single one of them made my eyes widen in horror.#i want them to be healthy. please treat each other better.#the number of bitchy bitchy fights i've seen between mlm couples in public that make me so terrified#but i know mlm relationships in general are usually less... affectionate than wlw relationships. even and especially friendships.#just an observation.#i hate to say that there is a definite difference between amab vs afab experiences when it comes to relationship dynamics but.#of course there is. there is. as much as i want to say gender and sex do not matter. it really does.#it makes a difference. it does.#which is kind of why i'm glad i was born in the body i was. when people say “trans means you feel you were born in the wrong body”#im like.. i don't think that's true. i don't think that's true for me.#i wouldn't be me if i wasn't born the way i was. and i want to be me. but i'm a boy. i'm a boy but in the body that i have.#my body is still a boy's body. because i live in here.#sorry this went off on a tangent.#but yeah i know my brain would be different if i was amab. and i don't want all those other issues.#i think the only reason i'm so peaceful and serene is because i'm afab. and afabulous.#i see cis guys and im like.. yeah i don't want what you got.#once again! lucky to be me! i'm lucky. im lucky i have a vargooba. thank fuck for that!#couldve been so much worse off. could've been born with a dick and would be fighting for my life right now.
40 notes · View notes
cherry-treelane · 1 month ago
Text
I find it so ironically funny when hardcore Debbie defenders use the defense that she was just a victimised teenage girl (agreed) and then proceed to slander Fiona and express their hatred for her character and lack of sympathy
as if being an adult magically absolves an individual of the horrifying trauma that precedes them and screws up their mentality and actions
funnily enough these people get mad at others for "expecting Debbie to be an innocent angel and hating on her for acting out as a result of trauma" (also agreed, debbie does deserve more sympathy, she can't be expected to grow up to be a perfect saint when she's been through so much) yet seem to hold Fiona to the same unattainable standards and put her on a pedestal as if she wasnt a child that was forced to intensely grow up while never actually being raised
like lets put this into perspective and remember that fiona grew up surrounded by corrupt morals and insanely screwed up behaviour yet still emerged as messed up, yes, but surprisingly good considering the situation she was in??? she had to navigate basic things such as morals and being a good, responsible person on her own. imagine how difficult it must be to lead a bunch of kids, including yourself, with no previous role model or good example of your own to follow. most of the time, she always tried to do what she thought was best and would have the most desirable outcome
#listen a lot of the time debbie defenders make good points#is debbie my favourite? no but she does deserve more sympathy#im really unserious on here and ive made some dumb meaningless jokes but at the heart of it i have sympathy for debbie#so no its not the debbie defense i have an issue with#its the way these people claim to be#1 understanders of shameless women and their complexity#top defenders#including of the women who have said and done worse than/just as bad as fiona#and then proceed to spew all this vitriolic lack of sympathy regarding fionas character#they always talk about fiona making the choice to be their legal guardian#as if the situation wasnt complex and 1) she felt pushed into an inescapable corner#2) that doesnt change the fact that she'd have strong feelings about her baby sister choosing to have a whole baby???#she claimed legal guardianship over HER siblings she did not foresee any other children being added to the mix#so yes she went about it harshly at times when she made debbie raise franny independently#but its not surprising considering her exhausted life?? her history as a TEENAGE GIRL and CHILD of raising kids???#there are actual mothers who'd be worse about this situation and fiona wasnt trying to be nasty#it was tough love and it could've been shown in better ways#and im not putting all the blame on debbie cause she was so young and vulnerable#but at the end of the day she made a choice and fiona was trying to help her understand the importance of consequences to your choice#and navigating adulthood when you choose to behave like one#of course debbie was often put in situations where she felt like she had to be a grown up and that is not her fault#but its not fionas either. theyre all just trying to survive. and fiona tried her damn hardest to preserve debbies childhood#so how do you think she'll react realistically to the whiplash of debbie purposefully getting pregnant#ultimately theres a lot of complexity and flaws and nuance to these situations and i find it weird when people criticise#others for putting so much blame on debbie#and then do the same to fiona as if shes not a victimised product of her environment too#you can show sympathy to debbie while understanding Fiona too and being critical in a mature#nuanced way#im not being a hater to anyone btw im just sharing some thoughts and letting it out. all im saying is#most of the shameless women deserve sympathy and understanding and its strange to deny fiona of that
10 notes · View notes
pisshandkerchief · 2 months ago
Text
there was an active shooter situation at work today god bless america
14 notes · View notes
apomaro-mellow · 2 months ago
Text
i was gonna make another 'woe is me' post but instead im gonna focus on the positives of the past 12 hours bc while my phone IS malfunctioning I:
Didn't cry about it (very brave)
Troubleshot it myself before deciding to take it to a shop
Found my way to 2 different shops by only using a map
Found my way back to my cousin's house w/o getting lost even once
The tech said it might be ready by tomorrow
I don't need my phone urgently
While I am trying to save money cuz I'm still looking for work and an apartment, I do have enough in my savings that I can afford a few hundred dollars that it's probably going to cost.
12 notes · View notes
khytal · 4 months ago
Text
that line eiji says that's like "if I had the chance to help someone within my reach and didn't extend my hand to them I'd regret it for the rest of my life" left a much stronger impression on me than I thought :(
every time I realize I can (and should) help a patient I start panicking and freeze up and then I feel really guilty afterward which isn't anything new but what IS new is that in my mind I see eiji being disappointed in me for not taking action and somehow that worsens the guilt
10 notes · View notes
sheetghosting · 8 months ago
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media
it's been 8 years, and i still couldn't be bothered to draw lavi properly
original drawing
original post
16 notes · View notes
miralyk · 11 months ago
Note
bruh desmond miles has to actually be your guardian angel, good you're okay but please stay safe
Tumblr media
oh my god this has to be the funniest reaction i got but yeah, it Is a christmas miracle i'm unharmed, but it's also karmic justice since it's actually my DAD'S car that got hit he swapped/stole OUR car that was supposed to be the one we were driving this vacation so. lmao
16 notes · View notes
transingthoseformers · 1 year ago
Note
Optimus is sharing his misery via snark. Which Blitzwing is taking as encouragement to keep going. The lecture includes diagrams of what purple prose in prewar smut actualy means. I imagine Shockwave is using wide band broadcast of the recording as propaganda and psychological attack. Maybe have it blare on every screen and comm for a few hours on loop before Longarm Prime can get it taken down. Because this is clearly being recorded.
Oh Starscream is very much treating this like class discussion. Mentions important acts and positions or at least ones he feels are important for any idiot to know. But the worst is when he winks at Blitzwing over the Autobot's helms and starts listing random items. "Now now lord Starscream zat is too advanced for ze little autobots." Niether Blitzwing nor Starscream know how you would use those items to interface but "ze mech with the chin seems to be having ideas."
The poor Jet twins are so confused, and Sari is just comparing notes like oh your smutty novels sound like earth smutty novels. Down to the same crappy sword and spear metaphors.
Ratchet: Sari you are to young be reading those sorts of novels!"
Sari: What?! I bypassed the parental controls years ago. There's so much worse on the internet than bodice rippers.
Optimus: We are not having this conversation!
Oh no
Oh no Oppy you have merely encouraged the tankjet
sHOCKWAVE NO (Shockwave yes)
Starscream you lovely menace, you're doing this on purpose
oh sentinel :)
Sfgfdd sari honey sari honey sari honey...
Ratty's just done with this shit, has been done with it. He's right, but he's so done with this situation.
UPDATE I HAD NOT EVEN CONSIDERED THE JETTWINS, ohh.
37 notes · View notes
fenharel-enaste · 8 months ago
Text
Got up and my kitchen was flooded how was your morning?
6 notes · View notes
kariachi · 1 year ago
Text
Sorry-not-sorry I'm back on my normal 'Kevin and Argit were so small' bullshittery.
Because they fucking were. Kevin was twelve when Servantis tossed everybody, and Argit couldn't have been far off. They were middle school aged. 'Puberty would be starting about now if we weren't wandering the Null Void and therefor likely not eating near enough' aged.
A pair of children, with minimal education, no paperwork, no homes, no guardians. Wandering the Null Void and then the Milky Way, on their own. One a prime target for the slave trade, both prime targets for adults looking to take advantage of them (*coughcoughOttocoughcough*). With only as much security as they could provide themselves and each other. Only able to rely on themselves for the basic necessities of life.
And then this show has the audacity to try to tell me that they turned to crime due to poor morality. That they're money focused because they're just naturally greedy. That they don't trust people and look out for themselves because they're bad people that either will always be bad people or will only improve because of the power of Tennysons.
What options were there for them? What jobs are there in the Null Void? What jobs are there in the galaxy that'll hire barely-teens, if even that, with no paperwork or educations, that wouldn't ruin them as badly and pay worse than the crime they already had experience with? Will keep them fed and clothed and sheltered? When one of them already has a criminal record, for violent crimes at that? When there's nobody there to stop even the 'good' adults from taking advantage of them?
The show will sit there and tell you that Kevin's violent crimes were the result of a rough childhood, but he and Argit's non-violent ones? Totally on them, no excuse, wholly a matter of greed and not giving a shit about other people. Fucking bullshit. This is a pair of kids who had to grow up way too fast, up against an existence that saw at least one of them as easy profit, with nothing but themselves and each other, and no opportunities. They're a pair of traumatized kids who grabbed the opportunities available to them with both hands and were molded by the problems they faced.
Of course they're money-focused, unlike the Tennysons they don't and haven't had anybody making sure they had enough to get by. They've had to support themselves and live with the constant worry that something is going to go pear-shaped and they'll have nothing.
They spent years with anybody and everybody being a potential threat (even between the two of them, Argit's noting that Kevin's snapping while he worked for the Rooters was the worst he'd seen 'before or since' makes it quite clear he's seen him on and passed the edge at least as much if not more than we have), of course they're going to be slow to trust, quick to toss people aside, and unwilling to help their enemies without some sort of payout, they've been burned before.
Just- Damnit these two come from some shitty fucking situations, the effects they had on them are obvious if you bother to fucking look, and they both deserved better than the series just going "oh yeah they're assholes what do you expect they're criminals" and moving the fuck on. Like, for fuck's sake at least acknowledge that they're like this because life was a fucking lead pipe to the teeth to them! We know Kevin's situation was shit even before they met, we got to see it, but even if Argit had a perfectly good life beforehand (unlikely) the earliest we see him is being held captive for illegal experimentation purposes by law enforcement! These two have been through shit! At least acknowledge it!
Fuck, they could've replaced Color of Monkey with that, hitting on the differences between how Kevin and Argit adapted to their circumstances, give us upfront the Tennysons being a safety net that let Kevin heal (rather than just 'oh the Tennysons taught him morals because they're the Good People') while Argit's issues and lack of security kept him stagnant. It would go better with what we see of him over the course of OV leading up to the Rooters arc, and what we're shown in the Rooters arc. Give us him still being far from great or on the up-and-up but improving with the stability that comes with his 'hero' status, a repairing relationship with Kevin after that arc, and a flourishing, above-board business. Rather than backpedaling on any good the writers had thrown at him like they'd realized they were coming up against a cliff.
Shit that makes you want to get the writers by the shoulders and shake them mercilessly.
#the fact kevin's willingness to leave his enemies to their fates is treated as a character flaw resulting from his being immoral#rather than a result of the traumatic-ass shit he's been though and these enemies continue to put him through#we *really* needed a scene between him and gwen where it's made clear that just because she and ben choose to forgive people#doesn't mean kevin has to and that his desire not to help people who only want to hurt him is entirely reasonable#argit has gone through so much shit too and it was understandable it didn't get touched on in UAF because it hadn't been established#but OV has no fucking excuse#bastards really went 'argit is a more accepting partner than rook and selflessly saved a lot of people's lives at least once-#-and cares about kevin and went through so much trauma alongside him and is the wielder of the omnitrix in at least one parallel universe'#and then turned around and went 'but also he is actually an even worse person than UAF showed-#-no really we know we just showed him being the type to selflessly save lives-#-but he's totally down with kidnapping and selling small children to be eaten'#these boys deserve better#honest to fuck they had argit selling children as food directly after showing us how he was treated as a thing by adults as a child#when we know kevin was a victim of the same shit and that argit held it against at least servantis#when we could have had an episode where kids are going missing in Undertown and the heroes learn because Argit called them about it#when we could've had something hitting on he and kevin's trauma from the shit they went through alongside argit growth#as he at the very least refuses to let other little kids go through shit like he and kevin did#which would play well with what we see of him in the rooters arc#*and* what we see in The Purge when he's the one who responds to the FK bullshit not by fleeing the planet but by informing Team Tennyson#despite being shown to have the *ability* to flee#we'd even still get to see scary post-rooters 'don't fuck with me' argit it'd be great#missed fucking opportunities all over the damn place doing these boys dirty
17 notes · View notes