#isn’t insanity meant to be trying the same thing over and over expecting a diff result?

[garden-bug]

Do you think Thrawn being “exiled” was traumatic? I mean, his people, whom he saved, decided for ‘political reasons’ that he was too unpredictable and in order to protect their own agendas they decided to get rid of them.

That’s rough. Like, really. Thrawn’s continued loyalty to them could almost be seen as a type of indoctrination actually. He cannot fathom an existence for himself that is not tied to the preservation and protection of his people. He is being controlled.

I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, but it’s set up perfectly for Thrawn to have a character arc where he realises that there is more to life than making yourself a servant of people who don’t appreciate you. We know that Thrawn has the capacity for friendship. Let him find people who matter. Let him find a new cause. Let him find meaning.

Or not because he’s a machine apparently and ‘maybe the Empire can help’ is the limit of his character. (I miss when Thrawn actually came up with solutions.)

Thrawn’s lack of growth is particularly evident in the Ahsoka series (god I wish that show wasn’t canon) because you really do wonder: Why is Thrawn still here? Why the fuck does he think the Empire can still save the chiss? The Empire is gone. Does he know the current status of the Ascendancy? Shouldn’t that be his priority?

These aren’t even cracks anymore; his initial motivation is in pieces. It makes no sense.

Who the hell is this guy and what is he doing?

I’m left to conclude that Thrawn post-Treason has fully just lost his mind because what even is the point. I miss ascendancy trilogy Thrawn so much.

[deadmugen]

i admire you, a lot. i want to change my mindset. not that it’s negative, but i find myself checking my social medias every few minutes when i’m bored. how can i stray away from that? i want to feed my mind with positive, inspirational, and motivational things, like those videos you listen to. how did you get into that and how can i become more motivated about life like you? 🖤

If you want the truth, it's not easy. It's hard. Its a full-time job. seriously. The first hour of the day when you wake up is the most important. First you can't check your phone at all. Checking our social media in the morning gives us endorphins with all the likes and comments we get that it makes us want more and that's what sets us up to be checking our phones all day. Second, the first thing you gotta do when you wake up is listen to something motivational as soon as you do you start doing your bed. A simple task as that gets you in the mood to do other tasks that come easy and naturally. After you do your bed, write down some tasks to do for that hour. Tasks you can do on the daily basis to build up discipline such as: 1. Do my bed 2. Brush my teeth 3. Walk my dog4. Workout and Run 5. Meditate 6. Cold Shower7. Read a book After completing each task put a check mark next to it. It gives you that feeling of accomplishment to do other goals you have for that day. It's the same feeling of accomplishment we get when we do tasks in videos games. That's why video games feel so rewarding but it's all done automatically for you. Therefore it feels even more rewarding writing them down and doing it daily. So for this I recommend writing down on a piece of paper either every morning or the night before you go to sleep for goals/tasks you want do accomplish the next day. I also recommend writing a big goal to accomplish that month then a small goal for everyday that goes to full filing the main goal of the month. And in that same piece of paper write down your tasks. So not only are you stimulating your subconscious mind with those goals but you will start focusing on ways to accomplish them instead of focusing on the negative aspects of them like everyone always does. Do not be vague with your goals be very specific and do not be afraid to dream big. The most tragic thing in life isn't aiming to high and missing it's aiming too low and hitting. So everyday write down and read your goals. Go even further by writing down your goal for this year. Schedule your day, your week, your month and even the whole year. The reason people aren't successful isn't because bad things are meant to happen to them it's because they believe bad things are meant to happen to them. It's because people don't work on themselves. You can't feel well and do well if you put nothing but negative aspects in your mind. You don't get in life what you want, you get in life what you are. Everyday you have to recondition your life. Every single day. And that's why people give up and most already broke their new years resolution. IF IT WAS EASY EVERYBODY WOULD DO IT. This is why I don't feel bad for people who complain about others success saying it's all luck, has to do with beauty or even intelligence. I don't feel bad for y'all because YOU FEEL BAD FOR YOURSELF ALREADY. I feel bad that you constantly program yourself to be negative. And that's sad. That's the definiation of insanity. Doing the same thing over and over again expecting things to change. The moment I realized that, that's when I started to change. I attracted certain things in my life because I made that decision i needed to change. Honestly I try helping people and sending people videos who seem like they need them but I stop because they're not willing to change themselves. People love to say they want to be this and that and have their own business. But keep having the same ass routine every weekend dealing with people who don't even appreciate them. And they go and complain about them later on social media. Y'all don't want change. Y'all just talk about it like if it just gonna happen. Be exact of what you want, be specific, what will make you happy? Do not stop until you have it. You see when things don't go my way. That only makes me angry. It just drives me and makes me more hungry than when I started. Y'all see challenges as obstacles, I see them as growing opportunities. What's the difference between you and me? Mindset. Thank you, and God bless you.

[aprilmillerphd-archive]

This is a Bias List. Because I am Biased, and also a Follow Forever. For reasons. Mostly that April hit a milestone and that’s friggin’ amazing in my book.

So I have to start with @darcywho who has been my main and exclusive Darcy since... well actually since I took April from the private rpc into the independent rpc something like four or five years ago. I know Mariah IRL (and will soon be living within easy driving distance of her)-- and basically. Mariah is bombtastic. She’s hella smart and funny, and when I’m having a crappy day (or given how the beginning of this year went, a crappy year) -- she texts me incessantly to talk about what Darcy is doing, and what April and Darcy should be doing, and I have so much character history, and Important Events, and developmental experiences just from talking and writing with Mariah, that I honestly don’t think April would be the character she is, without having had Darcy’s mitigating influence. We’ve just done so much that we’ve reached a point in our friendship and writing relationship where I literally feel as if Mariah could write April, and do her justice and vice versa. If y’all don’t follow her already, you should get on that because seriously, she is the absolute best take on Darcy Lewis that I have ever encountered in the Marvel RPC, and I know the PC rp com is going to jump down my throat for ‘making comparisons’-- but again. THis boo is my main and exclusive Darcy Lewis, also I do whut I want. @scarsearned MANGOOOOO. Okay so funfact; this brat used to have a diff url and we chat on dis/cord and it STILL took me like three days to realize on tumblr they were the same person. I FOLLOW YOU ON FOUR BLOGS MANGO. THis is what you signed up for all those years ago. I’m sorry. SO TO THE POINT! Mango has a bevy of blogs she runs, I met her when she wrote almost exclusively on Rummers here, and what I say ‘met her’ I mean I started sending her asks talking about Brock Rumlow, reread her rules and realized she had a password, at which point we were already talking over Skype, and then I sent in her password and she teased me relentlessly for it. (I deserved it, I’m a total goob)-- Mango is right up there with Mariah in terms of IMPORTANT character development shit. Mango writes a CANON DIVERGENT Brock Rumlow, and has put so much time into developing him, I think Marvel should give her a fuckin’ job. She’s also like... insanely smart. I say this as someone who likes to play at being really intelligent. Mango talks and I feel like I’m back in grade school and I want to hide myself away in shame. So obviously it’s no wonder we ended up shipping. (Actually no, I still have literally no idea how or why THAT happened tbqh I’m a fuckin’ potato) -- but Mango and Mariah go hand in hand because I introduced them and now their Brock and Darcy are inextricably linked forevermore as siblings and it’s fuckin’ A Plus. @russkiyuragan YET ANOTHER PERSON I MET BECAUSE OF MANGO. But also hella quality child of canon OC. Like, legit we started talking because Mango dragged us into a group rp and it turned into us mutuall talking about character development and now basically Seamus is one of April’s smols. Even though he really ISN’T one of hers. She’s basically claimed him as a child who needs mothering and dammit she is going to give him all the mothering ever. Even if he doesn’t need or want it. AND BASICALLY THEY ARE A FUCKING SWEETHEART WHO NEEDS ALL THE FUCKING LOVE because they’re really insanely smart and super sweet and friendly and I heart them. @phxtxn PHIL!!! OKAY SO I MET PHIL IN A CLOSED RPC FOR-FUCKING-EVER AGO. And immediately Genis and April butted heads. (He destroyed like half her office, ruined a couple PRICELESS books and then offered to buy her lunch in apology. Suffice to say April was less than impressed) -- except over the years, they’ve gotten really close. Occasionally Phil and I delve into the divergent canon where April and Genis actually end up romantically involved but it always ends in heartache because April is bad at being happy and Genis is bad at... well.. mitigating April’s more extreme bouts of self-loathing. BUT they are exceptional friends and Phil has a fantastic knack for finding the fun and funny in every situation and driving April absolutely UP A WALL. Phil’s also another rp partner I dragged into the collective with Mariah, because I like it when my writing partners all write together because I’m a spoiled princess. Phil’s a total sweetheart though and his Genis Vell is motherfucking spot on. He’s spent a lot of time with the character and it shows, but he also understands pragmatic, human interactions from a writing sense so it’s always a joy when we write together or chat. @askprofessorx NAAAAYYAA -- Naya’s another of those rpers I sort of. Grew on. Like a fungus. I wooed her with poetry first and then introduced her Charl to April and what I consider to be one of my more beautifully painful plot ideas. It involved time travel and the overhanging possibility of April dying. And because April was from the modern era trying desperately to get back, it was that much more painful when she started developing connections. And basically Naya and I plotted everything out over IMs and asks and now we have the most ridiculous tiny person ship in the history of ridiculous ships and Naya’s Charles is like... the cornerstone of my favorite Charles’s. She’s got this beautiful grasp of our fave telepath’s charming flirtatiousness and paired with the very Serious way he views morality and the world, which combined with April’s general cynicism (and it should be noted, our mutant verse involves April being a touch-telepath who can’t actually touch people without destroying their brains because control? what is that)-- and you have an April experiencing her worst fear. Which is not being in-control of herself. It’s beautiful and Naya is beautiful bean. @iremembereveryonethatleaves AHAHAHA Lilo was the first  ‘child’ April ever like. Accidentally adopted. And it happened entirely because of my age of aquarius verse, wherein instead of April seeking out Charles Xavier, she looked for Magneto instead. She found him. And his kid. And I literally have no idea WHY OR HOW April ended up becoming surrogate mom to Lilo since there’s no rational reason for Magneto getting along with April who is a cynical, borderline nihilist with Serious Rage Issues. But-- April and Lilo. Mommy and daughter and just. LITERALLY ALL MY HEART AND LOVE FOR THIS PERSON WHO MADE WRITING MUTANT APRIL FUN AND NOT PAINFUL. Until you (you asshole) made it painful. I still go through our tags to read all th angst, and I didn’t do it half so well as you and Tori did so.. @actually-i-prefer-magneto frick me so apparently I did my mutant crew in a triumvirate.  The flipside of the age of aquarius verse, where April found Magneto instead and became part of his Brotherhood. Because who wouldn’t have a need for a hyperpolyglot, with genius level intelligence and touch-telepathy? Magneto knew what he was getting out of the bargain, I just don’t think he expected April Miller. TBQH. Nobody ever expects her which is great, and this basically started as an incredibly painful, probably tragic plot that I had (sort of) intended to result in April’s death and it didn’t go that route. Like. At all. probably because these two babes understand that good angst is hard to come by and with the persistent low-hanging threat of April’s head getting blown off, or even worse, her returning to her own time, it meant that every interaction was always charged with a lowkey kind of desperation and tension.  Even when Erik and April got that ‘happy’ ending. It took an actual fucking lifetime to get there. And the best thing about Kristy is that she’s smart as fuck, I seem to surround myself with people who make writing look easy, and whose ability to thread together a long arching plot is so absolutely bafflingly amazing I am often struck stupid. @captain-outoftime AaBbbbYyyyYyy. So like- I met Abby through Mariah. Abby is the Steeb to Mariah’s Darcy. They’re hitched. It’s great. April helped Steve propose to Darcy even though April seems to have a PERPETUAL ISSUE with Steve Rogers that defies all explanation. IDK-- it’s probably something to do with the fact that April is a giant pain the ass and a tiny, fight-y blonde? WTF knows. Steve tolerates April. Abby tolerates me. Abby is a goddess. Beautiful, smart, funny as fuck, and like. Constantly busy. How she manages to balance RL shit with rp is beyond the scope of my ability to grasp yo but she’s the bomb-diggity. @americanasitgets MOTHERFUCKIN’ GABBY! My DC babe. Light of my liiife, fire in my loins, (not really but I was on a roll yo) -- I also met Gabby because of Mariah. And Gabby’s Clark. Gabby’s Clark is made of fucking sunshine okay, and the best part is, is that we’ve had like a sustained rp universe where April harasses Clark and doesnt know he’s superman, WHILE TASH-TRALKING SUPERMAN TO CLARK’S FACE. It’s comedy gold. Poor April. But I love Gabby, because she’s smart as shit and fuckin’ hysterical, and will literally snowball crack scenarios over IM into the wee hours of the morning. Even better, I’ve found someone whose as bad at keeping track of threads as me. (I say, as I eyeball our New Krypton thread that’s been in my drafts folder for like. Six months. Oops). @talonscourt D I KNOW THROUGH MY TIM BLOG-- but who I first met on April and then promptly FORGOT ABOUT because I’m a total dipshit. D writes Jason Todd, April surrogate son. This is a recent development. Tim loves Jason, April loves Jason. D is amazing as Jason. D is like... my platonic lover from Narnia. They’re smart as hell, and incredibly sweet even when I’m shit at keeping in contact because my real life is a hot-fuckin-mess and I’m always sick and on the verge of nuclear collapse. I would be TOTALLY LOST WITHOUT YOU. @galaeus Echo. As written by the ever talented Amy who I’ve known since April’s very first incarnation. Which... is a long ass time, Amy’s seen April through several character developments and rewrites, and has legit known April as a character since like. Legit. Post Tim. When April was a baby.  Echo is April’s other southern, raised by a pageant queen biffle. They shoot the shit together, Echo is also legit the only person in existence whose allowed to give April nicknames, or turn April into a diminutive. Amy’s basically like... hands down the reason why i never gave up on writing an Indie female OC, and that’s because Amy’s a boss and she also happens to be a spectacular writer, both in the RPC and in real life. @agentharrisonofshield and last but not least, this girl. Right here. April has like... a bevy of Awesome Girl Squad frands. All of whom are infinitely more talented and bad ass than she is, like. Legit. April’s smart. but in a fight? She’s basically cannon fodder by comparison. She just isn’t built for the field. April and Viv became friends because they got locked in a closet together. I’m not sure HOW that happened, but now they get together and chat in other languages and April feeds her, and basically this s the woman April goes to when she wants someone shot. I literally love all the headcanons we’ve put together and that Agent Harrison is invariably the first ‘shield agent’ April casually mentions outside of Echo, in threads of mine. That’s how you know you’ve found an awesome rp partner and friend. When their own characters start casually infiltrating your threads in the form of namedrops.