#is saved and actualized if you couldn't tell.

[3liza]

speaking of nostalgia everyone EXCEPT my parents told me when I was growing up that I couldn't just do whatever I wanted forever and I had to be more agreeable and shut up and stop fighting every little thing and take school more seriously and get a normal job etc etc and I cannot tell you how invigorating it is to have almost reached middle age and not be able to identify or agree with any of the posts on here about wishing you could go back in time and change huge swaths of your life and have do-overs. the result of being aggressively focused on finding out what you actually want to do and then pursuing it with singleminded purpose means almost all the bad shit that has happened to me in my life has been someone else's malevolence or just bad luck and almost all of it has been unavoidable. i can't adequately put into words what a relief this has been as I reached maturity. this is my strongest piece of advice to young people rn and also everyone else. planning to save all the shit you actually want to do for "retirement" is such a grimly funny idea when the entire world is coming down with early onset dysautonomia and derangement sequelae from postviral syndromes. you aren't going to retire, you're going to get COVID ten times and become crippled in your 50s and your 401k is going to evaporate into medical bills. start writing your novel now. adopt the cat. kill someone who deserves it

[darth-jess]

I think pretty much everything this person said about Obi-Wan and Ahsoka were absolutely correct, and I really really love what this person is trying to say.

However, I think they've got it wrong when it comes to Anakin.

First, I don't think Anakin was everything the Jedi preached against. Otherwise, he literally would not have been allowed to remain a Jedi. The Sith were what the Jedi preached against, and he wasn't a Sith, until he actually became a Sith and honestly he didn't want to become a Sith. Did he break the rules of the Jedi on occasion? Yes. Absolutely. Did he fuck up at times? Yeah. Royally.

But until he actually becomes Darth Vader, he was, overall, a very good Jedi. Flawed, of course, because everyone is flawed. He made mistakes, and he felt bad about them. He felt awful about what he'd done to the Tusken Raiders. He felt awful about how he'd killed Count Dooku.

I would say Darth Vader is everything the Jedi preached against. Not Anakin. Because Anakin tried very hard to be a good Jedi, and he did become a great Jedi.

Second, I think we need to address how the OP discusses love.

The OP says: "Instead of prioritizing those people, their wants and needs, he prioritized the way they made him feel."

And yet ... when does Anakin ever prioritize what he wants over what the people he loves want? When Padme tells Anakin they can't be together, he accepts it. In the Clone Wars, when Padme tells Anakin they need to take a break after he beat up Clovis, Anakin respects her choice even though it's heartbreaking for him.

Padme never tells Anakin, "Hey don't try to save my life." Obviously, she wouldn't have wanted him to kill younglings, to participate in the destruction of the Jedi Order as well as democracy itself, but she still wanted to live. She wanted to have their baby, to raise their child together. And he wanted that more than anything, too.

The OP says: "Instead of selfless love, he loved selfishly, which is exactly what the Jedi are against. They're not against love, they're against attachment."

In a sense, the OP is right. The Jedi are fine with unconditional love, but unconditional love is very different than romantic love. Romantic love, and having a relationship with a romantic partner demands some selfishness. And that isn't a BAD thing for regular people. It's just not good if you're a Jedi.

What I mean is this. Is it selfish to not want your loved one to die? Is it selfish to not want your loved one to cheat on you, or leave you? Is it selfish to ask your partner to help meet your needs, while you meet theirs? Technically, yes, it's a little bit selfish, but that doesn't make it bad. It's bad when you demand far more from your partner than is reasonable, it's bad when you have unreasonable expectations, but in a healthy relationship, you have to make sure your own needs are being met along with your partner's.

The OP says: "He couldn't accept that Padme or Obi Wan didn't agree with his vision, because if they don't make him feel good, then they no longer love him."

His vision? I'm not quite sure what this is referring to. Because Anakin Skywalker (not Darth Vader, Anakin Skywalker) really just wanted to save his wife and be a Jedi and raise his children and help people. That was his vision. And Padme agreed with this vision, that's why they were such a great couple. They were both dedicated to the Republic, both shared similar values, core beliefs, and goals.

Darth Vader still wanted the same things, but twisted by the dark side, he began to imagine that he and Padme wouldn't have to raise their children in secret. He could become Emperor and help people as much as he wanted. His vision hadn't really changed it was just how to go about achieving it that was altered by the dark side.

Even then, I really don't think it's "if they don't make him feel good, then they no longer love him," it's more that Anakin/Vader does not know how to love himself after the horrible things he's done. And if he can't do it, how could they?

The OP says: "Anakin was a kind boy twisted by the Sith and his misguided attachment to others."

Yes to the first part, no to the second. His attachment to others was not misguided. In fact, Obi-Wan, Padme, and Ahsoka were the only people who could have pulled him away from the darkness he faced. Which is exactly why Palpatine tried to sow seeds of doubt in Anakin about Padme's faithfulness to him (in the ROTS novelization), why Palpatine ensures Obi-Wan will be sent to Utapau when he turns Anakin to the Dark Side, and why Palpatine tries to have Ahsoka found guilty of the Jedi Temple bombing-- which fails, but still works out in his favor because she leaves the Jedi Order.

Palpatine works very hard to remove everyone from the picture who could bring Anakin back from the edge of darkness.

And in the end, it is Anakin's attachment to Padme, his attachment to his son, that ultimately saves him.

Anyway, I really hope this doesn't come off as offensive to the OP because again, I really liked what they were trying to say which is why I wanted to reblog their post in the first place! I just think it would've been better to say that Darth Vader or what Anakin becomes is what the Jedi preached against, rather than just saying "Anakin" is what they preached against.

I love the clone wars trio bc I see them all as different commentaries on the Jedi of the time.

Obi Wan is what the Jedi were.

Anakin is what the Jedi preached against.

Ahsoka is what the Jedi should aspire to be.

Obi Wan had the best of intentions: he wanted to save Anakin, to save Satine, to save Ahsoka. But in the end he failed due to Sith scheming. He was set up to fail, wether it be his dead master or the intergalactic war he was forced to fight in. And in the end Anakin did fall from the light, Satine was killed in Maul's quest for revenge, and Ahsoka walked away. He was a well-intentioned man with a good heart who was ultimately set up to fail by the Sith.

Anakin too wanted safety for his loved ones, but he took it to far. Instead of prioritizing those people, their wants and needs, he prioritized the way they made him felt. Instead of selfless love, he loved selfishly, which is exactlaly what the Jedi are against. They're not against love, they're against attachment. Anakin couldn't let go of Ahsoka: it corroded his faith in the Jedi, sowed seeds of resentment. He couldn't accept that Padme or Obi Wan didn't agree with his vision, because if they don't make him feel good, then they no longer love him. Anakin was a kind boy twisted by the Sith and his misguided attachment to others.

Ahsoka falls into a similar category as Obi Wan, except for one detial. She walked away. She recognized that the Jedi were unintentionally loosing themselves in war. And even through she was a spectacular warrior, a talented commander, she recognized that it wasn't supposed to be her job. She was able to let go of her attachment to Anakin and the 501st. She was a product of her masters and friends, of Obi Wan, Anakin, Padme, and all the others who influenced her growth. And even in the end, when her world fell, she still acted with compassion and understanding, which is exactly what a Jedi should be. Despite her discomfort with the twisted meaning of the title, Ahsoka embodied the fundamental traits of a Jedi. Not flawless, but an empathetic peacekeeper capable of embracing love and rejecting attachment.

Idk if I'm articulating it right, but the general idea is there.

[utilitycaster]

I think the fallacy that Downfall/Divergence lays bare is that again, Brennan is not simply a Capitalism And Power Bad guy (and indeed, it's fundamentally impossible to play D&D as Power Inherently Bad - it simply does not support that thesis and indeed actively works against it as a game system, regardless of how you feel about the nature of power in real life. It is also pretty much impossible to play as Violence and Murder Inherently Bad, and I think many analyses of actual play fail when people try to act like it could be played as such). The consistent message is that exploitation and failure to care for those less powerful, and a refusal to change, is the problem. And I think that Aeor and Marlath ultimately serve a similar purpose within these narratives.

The truth of the matter is that Aeor and Marlath are negatively affected by the greater powers within the context of the Calamity. While Aeor has consistently been described and portrayed as an isolationist, authoritarian, and warmongering city-state during the Age of Arcanum and early Calamity, presumably circumstances were more preferable to them during a time of terrestrial abundance, even if they were not themselves farming. Whether or not Aeor's response to the Calamity was justified is a matter of debate; but it is undeniable that they were genuinely scared of the gods. Similarly, Marlath was an opportunistic bureaucrat even before he sold others out (and was not rewarded), but he was still living under the tyranny of the Strife Emperor himself, serving as a cog in the machine because it was preferable to the alternative. Fear was the motivation for him as well, as it is for many who become part of an authoritarian regime.

The mageocracy of Aeor and Marlath's actions caused others concern; but both had opportunity to change for the better. Both failed. They may have again been acting from fear and trauma; but in doing so showed them as entities who would sell out the weakest in their community for their own benefit. Aeor focused not on medicine nor helping their fellow Exandrians, but on weaponry and persecution. Marlath's skills in inventory could have been a boon to a resource-limited community, but he chose exploitation. Selena could have kept her knowledge to herself and at least, in her last moments, tried to save her city if not her creation. She did not.

Within the context of the narrative, the destruction of Aeor and the cutting out of Marlath's tongue are not, in my opinion, joyful triumphs. I may cheer the latter - it is in many ways a victory, unlike Aeor which can only be framed as tragic, and also, crucially, it's pretend - but this is someone who was given multiple chances! Hell, maybe Fiedra didn't make the right choice - not that Marlath didn't need to be stopped (as much was said on Cooldown) but maybe there was, in this case, a nonviolent option. However, it's hard to condemn Fiedra either; she nearly died in the woods and was saved by this camp, and to see someone she stuck her neck out for and suffer with for over a week not just plan this exploitation, but assume she'd be in it on it, is a hard pill to swallow.

And so too in that way do Aeor and Marlath serve as turning points for the people who doomed them. The Prime Deities immediately decide to remove themselves from Exandria as soon as they can seal away the Betrayers again, taking no joy in what they've done. Fiedra tells Nez that she and her gang will be protectors, at risk to themselves, after a lifetime of being survivors at times at the expense of others. They change where others couldn't.

I think a lot of people like to assign D&D villains concepts and epithets, like Capitalism or Imperialism or Landlord or Religion, because it feels very good to destroy these things, and very bad to realize that to destroy them is to cut out the tongue of someone who may have escaped the same horrors as you and crossed the same wilderness. Most people do wish this change will come without "danger, fear, or risk on their part" and are dismayed to find there is not a bloodless option. The BBEG isn't just an avatar of capitalism: they are a person who keeps choosing it and won't listen to signs and speeches to change their ways. Similarly, the hero is not just the person who stops them; they are the person who realizes that they themselves are not without their own ways to change.

[thegoodwitchsworld]

Can I request 40s Bucky crushing on a nurse?? <3 TY!!!

WAIT FOR ME

Warnings angst, fluff, idk what else.

A/N- Thank you for the lovely ask anon, I hope you like this one :)

You miss him. You miss him so much.

Bucky, who asked you out six month ago, and whom you've been dating ever since. And he's the sweetest, kindest man you've ever met, and he looks at you like you hung up the stars and the sun in his skies.

But you still haven't slept with him yet.

Not that he's been pressuring you at all. He's a real man after all- he just kisses you softly and sweetly at the end of every date, and to be very honest you've had dates almost every day since one month. Then he lingers at your bedroom door, smiling sweetly and flirting shamelessly while you nervously play with your hair, turning redder by the minute.

But you never invite him in, and he never asks.

It's not that you don't want him. Of course you do. And so does he. You see the way he looks at you sometimes, as if he would like to rip off your blouse, slam you down on whatever nearest surface is available, and fuck at least ten babies inside you.

It makes your heart stutter. And your panties a mess.

But you can't. You just can't. The risks are too high.

.

.

.

"Robert! We need more gauze here! 2 gunshot wounds!", you shout for help as you kneel beside the wounded man, pressing your fingers into his bleeding abdomen, making him wince.

"How are you doing soldier? I need you to stay awake for me, ok?" You tell the handsome man, whose face is caked with mud and crusted blood.

He jolts as if out of a dream, then slowly grins.

"Doll," he says in an unmistakable Brooklyn accent.

"I'm gonna marry you."

That was the first time you met Bucky. You were used to soldiers flirting with you, but the way HE said it made your heart turn somersaults on the sidewalk.

You blush deeply, turning away from him and signaling Gary and Mark to carry him to the medical camp, before turning back around.

"You should save your energy soldier," you tell him more quietly, a smile threatening your stiff demeanor.

"You can call me Bucky doll," he grins. "Or anything else that fancies your pretty mind".

His wink makes your heart skip a beat, but you roll your eyes for show.

"And you can call me never," you smirk as he blows you a kiss before being carried away on the stretcher.

.

.

He's sleeping when you return to the temporary shed the military has set up, a few miles away from the actual battle site.

He looks peaceful, and so, so beautiful. You feel tears pricking your eyes as you think about the dreadful fates of many of these soldiers.

He stirs in his sleep, his expression growing more troubled. You realise he must be having a bad dream. You lean over him, sitting at the edge of the bed, smoothing his forehead softly with your palm.

It's okay, you tell him. You're okay.

His eyes slowly blink open. It takes him a minute, but when he realizes it's you, he breaks into another one of his heartwarming grins.

"It's you, my angel!" He exclaims.

"You were having a bad dream, " you look at him gently.

He smiles softer now, looking into your eyes.

"That's because I dreamt I asked you out, and you said no."

You blush and smile at his cheekiness, shaking your head in mock annoyance as you turn away to tend to another patient.

His hand on your wrist makes you stop.

"Stay. Please."

His voice is raw with emotion now. You're surprised for a moment, before you gently unclasp his grasp.

"Sleep, soldier." You softly cup his cheek. "I'll be here when you wake up."

That was 6 months ago. He was so injured the military forced him to take rest. And you were so grateful. The day he got discharged, he took you out on your first date to a diner in New York. He was chivalrous and kind and funny, and he told you a million times how much he loved you.

And you couldn't say it back even once.

You touch your hair and smoothen your dress one last time. Bucky's going to be here any minute. You both decided to stay in tonight, his last day before he's shipped off to battle tomorrow.

When the bell rings, you fly down the stairs two at a time and open the door to rush into his arms.

"Whoa," he chuckles. "Somebody was really excited to see me huh?"

You don't bother replying as you bury your nose in his leather jacket, inhaling his scent so that you can fill your lungs with him. His arms wrap around you tight, crushing you against his chest.

When you finally lean back and kiss him, he chuckles as he lifts you up and carries you inside.

"If you had your way doll, you'd keep me standing on the doorway kissing you forever," he teases you.

if you had your way, you would never let him leave. But you don't tell him that.

instead, you just say, "I cooked for you, soldier".

Bucky smiles and pulls you into his lap, kissing every inch of bare skin he can find.

"You're so good to me doll," he tells you. "I don't know what I did to deserve you."

.

.

.

"you're so good to me doll," Bucky grins as you gently wipe his face clean of sweat and dust. You smirk at him, rolling your eyes.

"I do this for everyone, soldier", you tell him.

"Yeah, but only I am going to marry you," he says with complete confidence that both turns you on and makes you blush and giggle like a schoolgirl.

He always calls you doll, because "You have eyes like a doll, and you wear clothes like a doll, and you look like a doll..."

"Shut up soldier", you'd blush and swat at his chest playfully, and he always catches your hand in his kissing your fingers softly with that look on his face, daring you to try and deny him what's his.

And you always call him soldier.

You both lie quietly on the couch after dinner, you on top of him, his fingers carding through your curls gently. You play with his dog tags, and he keeps kissing you every few minutes. The radio plays somewhere, a sweet love song.

"What are you thinking, doll?" He asks you quietly, stroking your soft cheek.

"Nothing," you reply. Only that you'll leave me tomorrow.

"Liar", he tells you, kissing your nose. "I'll tell you what i am thinking. When i come home the next time, I am gonna put a ring on your finger and at least ten babies in your belly. And we are gonna be husband and wife and we will grow old together and-"

"Stop soldier," you whisper, putting a finger on his lips, which he promptly starts nibbling, making you giggle before you recompose yourself.

"I am serious though. Nobody knows what tomorrow will bring," you continue softly.

"No, but mine lies with you," he says, his eyes glinting with a determination that scares you.

You both fall asleep that way. You still don't invite him to your bed, and he still doesnt ask.

The next morning he leaves for his mission. You wonder if it's odd that when he kisses you he tastes of desire and longing and promises, when all you can feel is regret and fear and apprehension. You hide your tears behind your polka-dotted handkerchief, waving to him as he boards the ship. He gets on, then runs back to you quickly for a brief moment, dipping you back in his arms and kissing you one last time.

"Wait for me, doll," he winks.

.

.

.

.

3 years later

War has ended, but its remnants hang in the air still, like the smell of cheap perfume in an elevator long after its wearer has left. The streets are full of men who are suddenly too many, and the jobs too few. Women try to keep up with their old jobs and their newly returned husbands. And your hospital is full of patients, some of them severely disfigured. But everything is much more cheerful now, because people have hope for a better tomorrow.

That is, everyone except you.

You lean over the young man, wiping his arm softly with wet cotton before you plunge an injection in it.

"Nurse Y/N?"

You turn around to find Mary, your colleague at the end of the bed. She walks over to you, taking the injection from your hand.

"I'll handle this," she cheerfully tells you. "You go take a break."

You're slightly confused, but you shrug and thank her and walk to the next patient.

"Doll?"

The familiar voice calls out to you.

You stop dead in your tracks, before slowly turning around to face him. Your hands are already trembling. And it's him.

Your soldier.

Your Bucky.

He looks older. And he has a metal arm..? And his face looks rougher and darker and unshaven. And he's the most beautiful man you have ever seen. Your body reacts to him before your brain can process the shock, so you run and throw yourself into his arms and then burst into tears a second later.

I love you Bucky, you whisper over and over. I love you.

They told me you were dead.

His fingers grip your waist as if he's clutching at a lifejacket. His arms crush you to his chest, and his tears soak your neck.

"I love you too, my angel," his voice cracks.

"I love you so much."

After an eternity of trying to fill your lungs with each other, you both finally let go, only slightly. You will never be able to stand being too far away from him again. And you know he's rough and broken right now, but you will help him smoothen the jagged ends and light up the dark places inside.

Then Bucky gets down on one knee with a ring in his hand, and you don't even bother to look at it before you crash your lips into his.

And now he tastes like marriage and ten kids and growing old together.

You get married the very next hour, and when Bucky carries you over the threshold in his arms, you dont have to invite him to your bedroom. And he doesn't ask.

You're his now and he's yours.

In this life and the next.

[la-gotica-fantasma]

8 realistic situations to add to your writing -

Disclaimers: I cannot stress enough that I am not at all trying to tell you what to write, these are just some concepts / prompts. - My title does not mean that your more lovey-dovey scenes are unrealistic, I just couldn't think of how to title this - Some of these are scenes that have been used in my writing, so if by the off chance you are using any of these, please don’t copy the dialogue word for word. :}

ROMANTIC -

1) When both of them are cuddling / holding hands and one of them starts sweating.

★ “Ugh! I love you, but I don’t love all this sweat you produce!” “But it’s my love for you seeping out of my pores!” “I couldn't care less what it is. Off!” “Fine, your majesty.”

2) Each character hating their mother in law / partners mother

★ “Mom is asking to visit.” “And do what?” “I’m not sure, check up on everyone?” “She can check up her own ass for the stick I know she’s lost up there.”

★ “Well, your mother is no saint.” “She never claimed to be!” “Uh-huh, and when has mine?” “Circa-” “Okay! Truce?” “Truce.”

3) Character X bringing up a pet peeve they have with Character Y at a family gathering.

★ “Character Y does this one thing when they eat- they never scoop up their food with their fork, they’ll just attack it! Sometimes I can’t stand it.” “You never told me that bothered you?” “It didn’t bother me enough to mention it.” “Not until a family dinner?” “I didn’t mean anything negative by it-” **cue Character Y aggressively attacking their food with their fork** “Okay, I get it! We’ll talk later.”

4) Character X and Character Y bake with each other, except realistically.

★ “Character X, why are your arms wrapped around me?” “Because I love you.” “I love you too but I also love being able to actually mix the ingredients together.”

★ “Get the eggs!” “You told me to stop buying eggs because ‘inflation will kill us all’.” “I wasn’t wrong but, UGH-! I need eggs!” “Well I got them anyway, but still.”

★ “Stop touching things!” “How am I supposed to bake without touching anything?!” “You aren’t!”

5) Planning lies they'll tell in 5 years when people ask how they met.

★ "What if we say that we were playing bumper cars and I hit you so hard I fell into your car?" "Hmm.. how about we say that I was going to my best friends wedding and I was all down and glum, but a friend of mine told me to 'have some fun' and that maybe I'd meet someone special at the wedding, and that's when I saw you. You and a little yellow umbrella that I've seen in so many places before, and we just talked about our past together?" "I think that's been done before." "By who?" "One of the most popular rom-coms ever aired."

★ "We could say I saved you from-" "I'm gonna stop you right there." "Fine. What's your idea then, if you're so smart?" "We tell them we met in a psychiatric ward." "Wow. Exquisite thinking." "Just imagine the looks on their faces!"

PLATONIC / ROMANTIC -

6) Those moments where neither party can decide on something so they do nothing, only for them both to yell out what they want and it coincidentally be an agreement.

★ “What do you want for dinner?” “I’m not sure, what do you want?” “I dunno.” **cue them both lazing around, doing nothing for minutes** “Spaghetti.” “It’s like you can read my mind.”

7) Character X asking Character Y how their day went, and Character Y just breaks down in tears- not because their day was bad, but just because Character X asked.

★ “Hi, how was work?” **cue ‘ugly’ sobbing** “Oh no, was it really that bad?” “No- It just- It was just- sweet to- ask-”

8) Stuff that should be awkward really not being awkward at all.

★ “Did you just fart?” “Yeah.” “Okay, good.” “‘Good’?” “Good that it’s not a gas leak.” “Yeah, I had to force it out a little bit.” "So definitely not a leak." "Definitely not."

p.s. Your writing is captivating as always suga, and I am abidingly proud of you and your work. <3

Morbid affection,

- Tipsy ᓚᘏᗢ

[promiscuousg1rl]

LOVE ME NOT — ONE

Rafe Cameron x Childhood!Bestfriend!Reader Social Media AU

Summary: Since sandbox days, it has always been you and Rafe. The only person who can put up with his selfish bastard ways, you became one of the boys. However as the two of you grew older, you started to realize you don’t see him as another one of the guys. Harboring a crush on someone is universally awful, but having a crush on your best friend is worse. Especially when he doesn’t reciprocate. Deciding to save your friendship, you settled on time apart, spending your summer in the Bahamas. When you return, you are a whole different person—jewelry, makeup, and chic clothes—you became an ugly duckling story turned right. But time apart have given you insight, and you aren’t sure if you still love Rafe.  While he realizes he's loved you this whole time.

Content: social media au, unrequited love trope, inspired/based on Love Me Not by Ravyn Lenae

Rafe's sure he broke every speed limit and ran every light to get the Boneyard after that picture was sent to him.

And it wasn't just JJ's arm being around your shoulder that made him immediately jump up and grab his keys; it was that pathetic excuse of bikini top you had on.

The last time he saw you, you'd been decked out in a t-shirt that was two sizes too big and a pair of knee length jean shorts. But as he stares at you from his spot next to Topper and Kelce, he wonders what exactly happened to you in the span of three months.

Now Rafe really isn't into fashion and girly shit like that (and he thought you weren't either), but he's ninety-nine percent sure the mini skirt you have on is designer. It's pink, a color he's never seen you wear in the ten years he's known you; not even when your mom tried to force you wear that pink fluffy dress for your birthday that one time.

It all just...wasn't you. The clothes, the jewelry, the perfect curls your hair was styled in.

"Dude we almost didn't recognize her at first glance," Kelce nudges Rafe's arm. "I've never seen her look like an actual girl before, it's freaking me out."

Topper snorts around the rim of his solo cup. "I forgot she even had boobs."

Kelce nods his head while they watch as she giggles at something JJ says to her.

Since when are they so fucking chummy with each other? Rafe asks himself. The way you were leaning into his side and letting your head rest on his shoulder as whatever bullshit he was spewing to you made you cackle.

"You're not gonna say anything?" Topper quirks a brow at Rafe's seemingly catatonic state.

"I—, she didn't even tell me she was back."

Kelce and Topper exchange a look before looking back to their best friend. "What, did you manage to piss her off all the way from North Carolina while she was in the Bahamas?"

Rafe's brows furrow. "Of course not. And even if I did, she still would've let me know that she and her folks were flying back in."

You would...wouldn't you?

He thinks about Topper's borderline accusation. Things between you two were fine when you left for your vacation with your parents. Hell, you came to see him right before you headed for the airport.

You joked like you always do, telling him not to miss you too much and he bantered back saying that he was counting down the minutes until your flight left. Your usual back and forth.

So what the hell had changed between then and now?

"Aye, y/n!"

Rafe is glad that it's Kelce that does it before for some reason, he couldn't find it in himself to. But whatever, things were about to go back to normal. Now that you'd know that the three of them were here, you'd ditch your new "friends" and come back to your real ones.

He's not sure what sparked your friendly behavior but it was all about to be straightened out.

Hearing your name being called from across the beach, you turn to look in their direction. And instead of pushing JJ's arm from around your shoulder and coming over to them like Rafe thought you would, you settle for one of your bright smiles and an eager wave. And that's it.

You turn right back around and continue talking to Kie and the rest of them like nothing even happened.

Rafe glances over at Kelce and Topper, finding them to be just as confused as he is.

He's positive you'll make time for him as the party goes on. You're not just going to go without speaking to him after three whole months of nothing being around each other. That'd be nuts and frankly, really unlike you.

After you finish dancing with Kie is when he thinks you'll finally give him the time of day. However right after that is when you do a couple of shots with John B and Pope. So he waits, and waits, and waits...and you still don't acknowledge him.

No, it seems JJ Maybank of all people has your attention. Record him doing stupid shit on your phone and in his opinion, standing a bit too close.

Rafe can't help but think that you and everyone else at this party are lucky he's not drinking. Because his temper and alcohol did not mix and as he sees your hand on JJ's bicep for what feels is the hundredth time tonight, his eye starts to twitch.

Kelce and Topper are long gone; Kelce finding some touron to hook up with while Topper had to go be at Sarah's beck and call for the rest of evening. Now it was just him.

When you and Kie start seeming to be heading out, he now knows that he has to be the one to make the move if you won't.

"Hey," he intercepts you as soon as you're near, earning an eye-roll from Kiera.

"Hey!" You smile up at him. "You're still here?"

"Uh," he looks from you to an obviously annoyed Kiera. "Yeah, I was actually waiting around for you,"

He can hear the hopefulness in his voice and wonders if you can too.

"Oh," your smile falls a little, bottom lip poking out slightly.

Are you wearing lipgloss?

"We were actually about to leave," You wince.

"Stay then," He hears an obvious scoff coming from your left but doesn't bother acknowledging her.

"Honestly, I'm pretty worn out." You look around the party with a shrug. "Nothing really keeping me here anyways, so we're gonna go chill at John B's."

"John B?" Rafe scoffs. “On a first name basis with those Pogues?”

You frown. "They're not all that bad."

"Is that what they tell you?"

Kiera's scoff is louder this time. "No one needed to tell her anything Rafe, y/n can think for herself."

"Stay out of this Kie."

"Fuck off, Rafe."

The glare they exchange is so intense you find yourself subtly easing in between them.

"Rafe, maybe another time...okay?"

When he looks back at you, his eyes immediately soften. But just as quick the gentleness he aims at you is replaced with a look only you can recognize as hurt.

And you almost want to tell him you change your mind, that you'd love to stay and update him on the changes your sure he's noticed.

However it's almost as if Kie can see your resolve weaken and she squeezes your hand. Willing you to remember the conversations you had.

So instead of being the same weak-willed person you usually were when it comes to Rafe Cameron, you don't bother waiting for him to even respond.

"I'll see you around."

With that, Kie doesn't hesitate to pull you away from him, all while you let her.

pls let me know if you'd like to be tagged 🩵!

[akutasoda]

helloo! platonic mara-struck blade accidentally attacking teen!reader?

mara-stricken accidents

synopsis - blade never wanted to hurt you, but with his mara accidents could always happen

includes - blade

warnings - gn!teen!reader, angst, slight comfort, small mentions of injuries, wc - 704

it was always a warning issued to you, one that always remained at the back of your head due to the potential huge amount of danger you could be in.

you knew it was to protect you and blade.

ever since you'd associated with the stellaron hunters, specifically blade, you'd been made very aware of every little to major danger you could ever be posed with. one of which included the potential of blade's mara flaring up - something that unfortunately always be a risk so learning how to deal with it would be the only response.

although it was certainly easier said than done seeing as blade couldn't exactly take control of when the mara would flare up or even how badly it affected him. the best precautions that could be taken were to either vacate the area for your own safety and get kafka to step in.

her spirit whispers weren't a permanent solution but the best option by far.

however, it was quite widely acknowledged that one day, since you and blade were quite close, that you would have the misfortune of watching him succumb to the mara. it was something that blade didn't want to put you through but he was very aware it was bound to happen - and pushing you away to try and avoid it was objectively a harsher fate.

blade would've never thought of bringing harm to you. especially after getting so close to you, hurting someone like you would bring blade more pain to himself, something he probably couldn't ever forgive himself for if he did.

but it was always bound to happen at some point. blade's mara had been flaring up for enough time for him to be able to recognise at least some of those signs, so the best he could do was to warn you if you were near.

the warnings were never fully possible, whether that was due to an overall lack of or simply it falling on deaf ears, it didn't matter as the failure would lead to you being around blade as the mara took control.

his mind was easily clouded and every sense of rational he had faded into a faint nothingness. you were worried for him, reluctant to leave his side as you didn't quite know what to do even if you did. - but perhaps running as far as you can with no plan would have still been the option you should've taken.

before either of you knew it, blade had drawn his blade against you. vicious intentions were held behind his actions, directed at nobody in particular with no real control for what happens next on blade's behalf.

all you could feel was a searing pain, from both the gashes being left on your body from being slashed by blade and from the pain of blade actually hurting you - even if you knew he had no control.

everything became a blur and you could only guess that you were lucky enough to have someone else to stumble across the scene and save you. the painful memories forever seared into your memory.

he was never fully conscious when the mara had control, therefore, he would only be aware of what he'd done when it subsided for the time being. and "waking up” from his mara stricken state to learn that he had in fact attacked you, it distressed him to a degree he wouldn't admit outloud.

it wasn't too surprising that balde then avoided you for a while. he couldn't bring himself to face you after learning what he'd done to you, and the fear of it happening again, at to a potential worse degree, was enough to discourage him from seeking out your company or even checking up on you.

it would take you to approach him for you and him to ever talk again. the guilt on his behalf was quite immense and so even then he was still wary - you could tell that it would take a while for it to ease.

from then on, blade would be more than cautious whenever you were around as he wouldn't ever be able to forgive himself if it happened again.

taglist - @little-miss-chaoss, @frankiesteinn

[writingdevil]

Here's a duo that I think has a lot of potential but is tragically overlooked.

Hunted & Broken.

Whether their romantic or platonic is up to you, but I think they have quite a bit in common. Their both people pleasers in their own right, and they both have experience in feeling small.

(I think they'd be such a good duo as well. The one that is willing to lay down their life for safety and survival, and the one who is constantly trying to survive and escape the dangers after them. I think they'd be cute, and that Hunted wouldn't care about all of Broken's mistakes or what Broken believes to be weaknesses, just that he's safe and healthy. Anyways, enjoy!)

Hunted was walking up to his bedroom door at the end of a long day-when he suddenly froze, and sniffed the air.

Someone was in his nest.

It wasn't an immediate threat, as he lived with ten other people who had a habit of crawling into others beds when they were lonely. Hunted just wished he had been informed beforehand-save him the sudden urge to panic and flee.

He sniffed the air again, making sure he knew who it was.

Everyone had their own certain scent, and more often than not, Hunted used his sense of smell to locate his flockmates, instead of just asking or mindlessly looking around.

Some smelled earthy and fresh from a forest, like Stubborn, and some smelled sweeter and more flowery, like Smitten.

The scent in his room was faint, like the person cleaned themselves almost too much, but Hunted could pick up a salty odour with a metallic hint.

Broken.

His body relaxed, and he quietly opened his door, instantly noticing the small lump in his pile of blankets and pillows. There wasn't any point in calling out for him if he just wanted to sleep in his nest. A lot of the others, like Paranoid or Oppy, found Hunted's nest a safe place to relax, and would often ask to join him in his nest.

Broken wasn't an uncommon visitor, but he's never just showed up in his room unannounced, so Hunted wondered if everything was okay.

He made his way over to the bed silently, then leaned over to try and get a good look at Broken. He was curled up with his knees tucked into his chest, but he seemed okay so far. Maybe he had a nightmare earlier in the day and couldn't wait for Hunte to get back. Either way, Hunted was always pleased to share his nest with his flockmates.

Hunted tried to crawl into bed as quietly as he could, but as soon as he got settled, he heard Broken whisper, "You're back."

Hunted froze, then looked over. Broken was looking at him as if he hadn't been asleep at all, giving him a soft look with a smile. Broken glanced down as he said, "I'm sorry for not asking you if I could come into your nest. I know you're really proud of it."

"Flockmates are always welcome in the nest," Hunted whispered back, relaxing fully against the pillows and gazing at Broken across from him. "Did something happen? Was it another bad day?"

Broken shook his head. "No, actually. I just-um-I missed you." Hunted's eyes widened in shock, and Broken shoved his face further into his pillow. "Why?" Hunted asked, "Did you feel unsafe today?"

"Not really," Broken replied, turning his face around so he could be heard properly. "You were just gone all day, so I started to miss you. You're usually all over the place, making sure that everyone's safe, but I didn't hear your footsteps today, or the way you whisper to yourself."

"What do my footsteps sound like?" Hunted was honestly surprised that Broken noticed those things about him, and that he actually missed Hunted fretting all about the house.

Broken shrugged. "You're never too noisy, but I can tell it's you because your footsteps sound kinda-fast? Panicky? Like you can't stop moving for a second or else something bad will happen."

Hunted just stared at Broken, extremely impressed and surprised that Broken managed to observe that about him. He actually felt a flicker of fuzzy warmth inside his chest, feeling touched at having someone pay that much attention to him. Is this how the others feel whenever he notices something concerning with them, and tries to fix it? No wonder they get so embarrassed about it-Hunted's never felt so exposed before.

Broken glanced down at his stomach, where his arms had been wrapped around him the whole time. "I decided to-um-draw you, since I didn't see you around today."

Broken unwrapped his arms, revealing a crumpled piece of paper pinned to his stomach. Hunted felt himself holding his breath as Broken held up the paper-first to himself, and his feathers fluffed up, but he still went through with turning it around to show Hunted.

Hunted gasped, his eyes taking in every inch of the page as he reached out to take it. It was a sketch of Hunted, sitting outside. He had a calm expression on his face and there was an air of serenity around him in the drawing, and his eyes looked clear of worry or fear. He was sitting on top of a hill, overlooking the forest below him, along with a cabin at the very bottom, and that was when Hunted realised-that was his lookout spot.

That was the spot he was usually stationed at when he was scanning for danger. But in this drawing, Hunted looked quite- commanding. Like he was some great protector of the forest and all its inhabitants.

After a few minutes of trying to capture the picture in his head forever, Hunted looked up at Broken, to find the other trying to hide his face amongst the pillows again, groaning to himself, before he noticed Hunted staring at him, and he said through muffled a tone, "It's bad, I know-"

"No, no-" Hunted was quick to disagree, shaking his head as he scooted closer to Broken, waiting until Broken managed to show his face completely, and said, "I love it. I really do."

Broken glanced back down at the drawing. "You sure?"

"Yes." Hunted gazed down at the drawing, not fully believing that the Hunted in the picture was how Broken actually saw him. "I've never gotten a gift like this before. I didn't know you saw me that way."

"We all see you that way," Broken said, "It was just weird not having you around the house. You make everything feel-nicer."

Hunted smiled, leaning over to press his forehead against Broken's, who closed his eyes peacefully. "You make everything nicer as well."

Broken hummed, and a small smile graced his face, as he drifted off to sleep, and Hunted could feel his own mind succumbing to his exhaustion. He made sure that the picture was safe, nestled between himself and Broken as he fell asleep, and Hunted vowed to treasure it within his nest forever.

[redjaybathood]

Yeah, Jason Todd, a man famous for refusing to kill Joker. After spending like a whole book trying to do just that and even after getting lobotomised. Same with "he doesn't care about the victims" or predominantly kills lackies instead of supervillain: he literally gave a house to a mother and son he saved just recently; he held fundraiser; he stopped his friend from killing every criminal henchman frelancer in Gotham

And I dunno. Sometimes I think about people he did kill from the time when he freely killed people - say, guys who kidnapped a child in Brothers in Blood but also he did go after their bosses after. Very explicitly.

Like, I think - regardless of some fans trying to pass Jason as an anarchist or communist or whatever - people who oppose that reading have a very static, very prejudiced view of Jason. It is mostly from UtRH Jason, and from other comments it's clear that they have issues with daddy issues, which, okay. But they don't ever ask: why Batman, Batgirl, Huntress, the rest of them, mostly go after criminals who are ordered to do bad things like sell drugs or kill people, and not fight one on one the big boss in every issue? Because, let me tell you, the standard of "I'm not talking about Penguin, Dent... I'm talking about Joker because he took me away from you, even if you ignore the cemeteries he filled" - that's a standard for Batman, not for himself, so it makes sense for Jason at the time to not be out there only sniping the super mega villains. He couldn't really get to Black Mask or dismantle his empire without, well, curbing his power, which means bleeding his resources and his people. And I'm not saying that's how you fight crime, I'm saying that it's not contradictory.

And "it's not leftist" girl, were you on tumblr lately. This is very much a far leftist thing. Which, again, I'm not saying Jason is. But leftists here lauded literal terrorist acts irl as a decolonisation effort. An assassination as an iconic anti-capitalist act of resistance So like.

Tldr, check your biases and don't forget to discern fiction from reality. Real people dying = bad. Fictional = fun, actually.

[flamingspud]

He’s a Skateboard Legend, Trust

How did Joel get here? Pride. But it was fine, he knew what he was doing.

Joel bets Etho he can fit in with the skateboarders. It goes about as well as you expect.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/63372760

My second work for the @mcyt-soulmate-sweepstakes !! Enjoy!

fic under the cut:

How did Joel get here?

Pride. But it was fine, he knew what he was doing.

Not about skateboarding mind you, no, he hadn't the faintest clue about how to do that. He wasn't even properly good at balancing on the board.

But it couldn't be that hard, right? He bet money on it, and there was no way he was going to let Etho win.

He was sitting off to the side, when Etho, frustratingly, said "hey, Joel, why don't you show us your skills?"

Joel waved him off, like he'd been doing all night to any skaters who'd invited him to actually skate. "I'm just taking a drink, I will in a minute."

You see, the deal wasn't to prove he was an excellent skateboarder, but instead not to be caught out as a fake for the entire night. However, Etho wasn't going to make that easy for him.

"Ok, I'll wait for you then."

Joel could hear the smile in his voice as he said it. He had made sure to say it loudly enough so that the others heard, so it wasn't like Joel could get out of it without blowing his cover.

Fine, if he was going to be that way, so be it.

Joel took a long sip of his water, buying time to calm his nerves.

He then screwed the cap shut and walked over to the bowl with confidence.

Joel could tell by the way Etho looked at him that he was smirking at him under his mask. "Why don't we have a little challenge, see who skates better?"

"Sure," Joel said, way too confident for a man who just threw out his excuse of he wasn't trying.

"Perfect," Etho replied. Joel then watched as he dropped down into the bowl, flew up the other side, and did some kind of kickflip or something in the air before seamlessly rolling back down and across to where Joel and the others were standing.

He neatly hopped back up and landed on his feet. "Top that."

Joel could tell by the crowd's reaction that he hadn't done something insanely impressive, something only Joel knew was to make a bigger fool out of him.

He simply smiled lazily at him, and put his board on the ground. He stepped up onto it, managing not to lose his balance as he got himself into position.

Joel took a deep breath, and pushed off.

He fell off as soon as the first wheel went over the edge. He shot his arms out in a last ditch effort to save this, but it was no good.

He hit head head on the lip of the bowl, and scraped his hands as he tumbled down to the bottom.

"Joel!"

Etho was quickly at his side as he sat up, somewhat dazed.

"Are you ok?" He asked, all his competitiveness gone.

Joel gave him a shaky thumbs up. "That's what the helmet's for, right?"

Etho was incredulous. "You weren't meant to actually try it!"

Joel giggled. "You thought I was going to give up that easily?"

"Well, kind of, yeah."

Joel laughed even harder at that. "Well you thought wrong."

Etho rolled his eyes and helped Joel to his feet. He then grabbed his board and guided Joel out of the bowl.

"Woah, what happened? Are you ok?" One of the bystanders asked once they were on flat ground.

"Fine," Joel said. He doubted anyone was going to believe that he was a pro now.

"I think he has a dodgy wheel," Etho said matter-of-factly.

Joel's eyes went wide. Once Etho had helped him over to a bench off to the side, Joel hissed "what was that?!"

"What was what?" Etho asked innocently.

"You just saved my ass from being found out!" He told him, "why?!"

Etho shrugged. "I figured you were way too desperate for five bucks to let your sacrifice go to waste."

"I wasn't desperate," Joel insisted, but Etho shook his head.

"You tried a bowl trick when you have the grace of an elephant."

"Hey, I did pretty alright for the first second!"

Etho laughed. "Yeah right."

Joel shoved him. "You're the one who challenged me!"

"Yeah, that was my bad."

"Yes, it was."

A comfortable silence fell between the two, as they watched the others go about their boards.

Despite absolutely eating cement, Joel had fun.

Maybe he should make bets with Etho more often.

[cosmicjoke]

This anon is so dumb, they really didn't deserve this level of breakdown, but I wanted to thank you for contributing and adding it anyway, @mlelmsworld Because it's so on point and demonstrates perfectly what you and @levi-ackerman-ds were saying about how Eren's entire character revolves around the concept of bucking authority and doing whatever the fuck he wants, no matter the consequences. The way he's disappointed in and loses his respect for Levi because Levi actually follows orders and the chain of command says it all. It sets up how and why he ends up doing the exact opposite of what Levi advises him to do. This clown of an anon says Levi was a terrible mentor, but what it actually is is that Eren was a terrible student. He refused to listen because he was hellbent on never listening to anybody, never being told what to do, never, as LADS said, adhering to any rules or laws, because he wanted "absolute freedom", which can't exist if you care at all about others. You can't just do whatever you want if you care about the impact of those choices in the world. Eren cared, but he cared more about experiencing his idea of true freedom, and as he's always done, he ultimately chose to fulfill his own, selfish desire over his love and concern for his comrades and friends.

As you pointed out, he's been doing that since he was a child, getting himself into trouble because he never thought about the grief he was causing his mother, or Mikasa or Armin, by getting into fights and then having to get his ass rescued. And he does this throughout the story. Like when he engages with Reiner in that stupid MMA style fight and ends up getting kidnapped as a result. The entire scouting legion has to go after his ass to rescue him, including Erwin, who loses his fucking arm as a result. Or during the Female Titan arc, when he goes back to fight Annie, and ends up needing to get rescued by Levi and Mikasa. Of course there's him making himself into a hostage of Marley and forcing the entire scouting legion to, again, come to his rescue. All of this, over and over, forces his friends and comrades into actions they didn't choose for themselves and which they never would have chosen for themselves if he hadn't forced it on them. It ultimately culminates in him enacting the Rumbling and forcing what's left of them to go after his ass to stop him, once more. He gets Sasha killed. He gets Hange killed. He nearly gets Levi killed. He wipes out 80% of humanity. All because he's a selfish little bastard who prioritized his own desires over everyone and everything else. I don't understand how people can see that, see how he gets his own comrades killed because he's forcing them into dangerous situations against their own will, and still claim that he "did it to save his friends". No he didn't, bitch. The fact so many of his friends die and end up permanently injured as a result of his actions should in and of itself be enough to clarify that Eren was always acting for selfish gain.

One last point that you made, about how Eren never had any intention of living with his decision. Exactly. Eren knew he deserved to die, and further, he wanted to die, because he knew, in complete contrast to what Levi advised him, he'd made a choice that he couldn't live with. Eren's entire monologue to the alliance about not being willing to impede on their agency, and that being why he doesn't stop them from coming after him, is also nothing but a giant cope on his part, just like the bullshit he peddles to Armin at first about doing it to make them look like heroes. It's a lie he tells to both himself and others in order to hide from the horrible truth, which is that he's just a massive piece of shit who wants to wipe humanity off the face of the planet and willingly acts to do so. Eren did nothing but impede on the agency of his friends and comrades up to that point. The hypocrisy of his claims can't be overstated. He's totally full of it and he knows it.

What's more, he still got to experience "freedom", the sight of freedom he glimpsed in his visions of the future. All it took was 80% success for him to have that moment, where we see him transformed back into a child with his arms spread wide and above the clouds. But until that moment in the Paths, when Ymir lends him her full power, Eren fully believed he would succeed in wiping out 100% of humanity, and that was fully his intention. He never had some plan to only wipe out a certain percentage to "even the playing field" between Paradis and the rest of the world, or make his friends look like heroes. He was going to wipe out every, single person on the planet, like he stated over and over in the lead-up to that moment. When he touches Ymir and gains her power, he sees he's going to fail to do that, but it doesn't undo the vision he had before of his own experience of "freedom". He knows he's still going to get to experience that moment if he continues with his plan. And low and behold, he does, despite knowing that being stopped at 80% is actually going to worsen things for Paradis, only going to exacerbate the hostility and mistrust between the island and the rest of the world, which is why Armin is so horrified and angry near the end, during their conversation, because Eren admits it to him. He's admitting to Armin, after peddling his bullshit about making them into heroes, that he continue to pursue his goal despite knowing it would make everything worse, not better.

If Eren's true motivation was the well-being of his friends and of Paradis, he would have stopped acting the moment he saw he failed to wipe out 100% of humanity. The moment he saw his friends would risk their lives to stop him. But he didn't. He just... kept... going.

He put himself over all of them, like he always did.

The alliance betrayed Eren. The whole world wanted Paradis killed and all Eren did was fight back. What else should he have done? It was genocide vs genocide. His friends are hypocrites and horrible characters that wanted to play moral police. Hanji and Levi were horrible mentors. Open your eyes.

If you genuinely believe any of the garbage that you just spewed, then you need mental help.

I shouldn't even take the time to point out to you what's wrong with your "argument", because honestly, anyone this stupid and lacking in self-awareness isn't worth mine or anybody's time.

But I'll just lay out a few, basic facts for your edification.

Eren betrayed his comrades, over and over, starting with his literal incitement of war in Liberio, through his purposeful elimination of any other course of action that Paradis could have taken to secure their future. War only came to Paradis in the first place, you total clown, because Eren and Zeke orchestrated it themselves. I don't know how many times this has to be pointed out to people like you before it gets through that sediment-thick rock you call a skull and into the mush you call a brain. Go read the manga again, or watch the anime, and maybe try paying attention this time past the masturbation session you engage in every time Eren comes on screen.

The Survey Corps' entire mission statement was to dedicate themselves to the salvation of humanity. Not "Paradis", humanity. And Eren betrayed that mission in the most fundamental way possible by committing mass genocide on a global scale. He literally spit on the legacy and sacrifices of every single one of his comrades, including those who had given their lives to protect his, because they believed he was essential to humanity's survival. Instead of honoring that sacrifice by doing everything in his power to save humanity, he did the exact opposite by deciding to wipe humanity out of existence because he was disappointed the world didn't look like the pictures in Armin's books. That's how shallow, pathetic, selfish and childish Eren is.

You call Levi and Hange "terrible mentors", when Eren literally did exactly the opposite of what they both tried to teach him. Levi specifically told Eren to make the choice he could live with, the one he wouldn't regret, and yet, in the end, we see Eren filled with nothing but regret, drowning in self-loathing, because he knows he made the choice which went against what he knew in his heart was right. He spurned Levi's guidance entirely. Eren knew what he did was wrong and not justifiable on any level. What Eren did didn't sit right in any way, shape or form with his own, moral understanding of the world. Nobody made Eren into what he was. Nobody made Eren do what he did. It was a situation entirely of his own making and choosing.

You call the other members of the alliance "horrible characters" because they couldn't and wouldn't stand by and allow literally billions of innocent people to be murdered in cold blood. Remind me to pray to God that no important decisions are ever left to you. The lack of self-awareness in your statement is shocking in its depth. You don't see how, if this is what you truly believe and support, that it's you who's the truly terrible and horrible person here. Frankly, you're a disgusting example of a human being.

By stopping Eren, Levi, Hange and the rest of the alliance were upholding everything the Survey Corps originally stood and fought for. You calling them traitors and hypocrites is repulsive in its stupidity.

And that's all I'll say on the matter. You can now go back to waiting in line with Floch to swallow Eren's cock, since that's clearly what you really want to spend your time doing. Try not to choke.

[everysongineverykey]

as part of the getting-worse-before-it-gets-better portion of aziraphale and crowley's season 3 relationship arc we NEED a desperate "i love you" from aziraphale met with a hissed, spiteful, and quickly regretted "i forgive you" from crowley

[starry-bi-sky]

mmmmmm read a disciple shen yuan/shizun luo binghe fanfic about two days ago where the first chapter was the Immortal Conference arc, and SQQ was the one who had to be pushed into the abyss (he was still the villain) except Luo Binghe was refusing and was like, lowkey losing his mind about SQQ being so close to the edge. SQQ ended up having to be the one to fall in himself because of the system's punishment system. The rest of the fic is leading up to that moment. But like, MMM i've been obsessively thinking about that first chapter for DAYS ever since.

now i've been in svsss for a grand total of *checks watch* a week. but god obsessed with that. I want to write/read a fic where disciple SQQ goes a little nuts down there. Like keep all of the things that make SQQ, SQQ, but just. Throw in a little bit more trauma in there. A little bit of a mental break. Let him go a little nuts as a treat. Just a tad unhinged. I wanna see him go, just a little, "god fuck it, i've tried so hard to change this shitty story's outcome and it feels like everything i've done has been for nothing. I'm going to die in this world no matter what I do, I've been doomed from the start, so might as well die the way I want to." and he just, breaks a little! Under all the stress.

He still retains the traits that makes shen yuan, shen yuan, like his overwhelming kindness. But he's just! yk. A little less patient. Paranoid. Jumpy. Colder. A little more aloof and closed off. A little more Shen Jiu. He's no asshole child abuser, but he was a Number One Hater in his past life and he's leaning into that old habit a little more now.

(On a totally coincidental not-at-all related note, there's not enough SJ-and-SY-are-the-same-people fics out there that i've found. This is totally unrelated...)

The Endless Abyss turns the mind into an over-sharpened blade, and SQQ is both fascinated and perhaps a little excited to explore a place that doesn't have a lot of info on it in the mortal realm, but still terrified out of his mind. And he's no Luo Binghe, he doesn't have the sheer brute strength and power to just bulldoze his way through, so he has to be a lot more sneaky and cunning if he wants to survive.

The fic itself role-swapped LBH and SQQ so that SQQ was the half-demon (which lowkey fucks) and LBH the human, but I'm equally-if-not-more obsessed with the idea that LBH remains the half-heavenly demon and SQQ the human. If only because I keep thinking about SQQ befriending some demons (particularly and specifically a group of succubi) and they grow very attached to this Human Cultivator so through magic plot stuff they create some kind of seal/illusion/talisman that makes SQQ appear as a demon because a human cultivator in the endless abyss may as well be the equivalent of putting a giant neon target on your back.

And iirc Shen Jiu was taught demonic cultivation by that one guy(?? i've only been here a week so im not caught up in ALL of the lore yet) so that could totally happen here.

(On the other end of the realms, poor Shizun Luo Binghe is just. losing his fucking mind over losing his most precious and beloved disciple. About .5 seconds from burning down the peaks himself. somebody sedate him.)

The Endless Abyss sucks and SQQ is having a really terrible time and can feel himself going lowkey mad, but also holy shit look at all this WORLD-BUILDING. look at all this flora and fauna, and oh if he had the equipment for it he'd be writing all of this down. ALL OF IT. He was kinda-sorta-already planning on never leaving the Abyss as some sort of fucked up self-exile and self-preservation thing, but now he might? actually just?? never leave if he can help it, like he lowkey likes it down here.

anyways the next time anyone ever sees SQQ again he's got hair so long its almost touching the ground and he's either in rags and half-feral or he's been completely dolled up by his adoptive succubi sisters and still about three seconds from biting anyone who tries to touch him. (he's also lowkey trying to book it back down to the abyss even if he has desperately missed all of his friends and shizun)

[runes-menagerie]

Astarion stepped out of the way when she began to stretch her wings. He was wary both of her trying to attack or trying to escape. He was pleased when she did neither and he couldn't really blame her for wanting a good stretch after being chained up.

Once she was done he began to lead her through the seemingly maze-like halls. It wasn't quite as bad as it looked since there were some mirrors and paintings involved but it was still big. There were also drapes everywhere both to cover the windows and make it hard to tell where the windows were. It was all a defensive tactic just in case any of his enemies actually made it into the castle.

"For now I think it best for you to stay in the healer's wing. Prove you can be trusted however and I will consider giving you more freedom to roam. I might even let you visit the gardens before the war is over if you're a good girl." Astarion answered with a playful wink. This was also a test to see if she would actually follow his rules. If she could managed to stay in the healer's wing for a week without trying to leave it then he planned to let her access some other areas like the library and the conservatory so she could get some sun if she wished.

"As for work. Currently everyone is in a stable condition and your powers aren't needed at this precise moment but should that change then I will be calling on you. Unless an emergency comes up however then you're welcome to take the rest of the day to settle in and rest. After breakfast tomorrow will be soon enough for you to look over your patients." He continued thoughtfully. He didn't want to overwork her but at the same time, if it was a choice between that and saving the life of one of his children then he would chose his children any day or night.

She let out a quiet sigh of relief. Slowly the wings unfurled, no quick movements as to not provoke anyone. Carefully the wings stretched open to their full wingspan, their length long then she was tall. After a few slow movements meant to check for injury, she nodded as if satisfied. The speckled wings finally closed themselves, now tucked against their back. She would be able to do a more in depth check later on but for now there was nothing that concerned her about her wings.

It did make sense for her to be closer to the infirmary. She wondered where in the castle she would be permitted to go? If she were allowed to explore in the time she wasn't working. When were her hours she would be working and would she be permitted breaks? So many questions. It would be easier to focus on healing since it seemed she didn't need to hold back to save some spells for fighting.

As they walked the nephil attempted to keep on eye on where they went and what turns they took. After a moments hesitation, she decided to try and get some information on her situation. One question at a time. "Just where in the castle will I be permitted to go? Will I be starting tomorrow?"

[coquelicoq]

[ID: Panels from chapter 101 of the Natsume's Book of Friends manga. Natsume thanks Natori and Matoba for coming to rescue him and Nyanko-sensei. Natori's serious but unsurprised expression remains unchanged over three panels. Matoba's lips are slightly parted, and in the second panel he says, "Huh…?" /end ID]

the contrast in reactions between natori and matoba...matoba and his little taken aback "what the hell am i supposed to do with this bid for human connection" face that i hold so dear. idk what's going on with natori exactly but my guess is he's just. really scared for natsume. he must have been, to have gone to get matoba. natsume doesn't get natori's affectionately indulgent look until after the danger has passed. natori's gotta get his game face on.

[kaorucup]

wander and hater watch a movie (ft. peepers)

hater's definitely immature enough to go watch the Micheal Bay skibidi toilet movie

based off the latest absolutenutcase post, inspired to wanderfy it by users like @wtf-drawing

(there's other people that have done it but I forgot their usernames)