#is it romantic? who knows but it sure is present regardless of what either of them say!

[voxisdaddy]

İ have a request, how would hazbin hotel and angels (or archangels) reacts to a coqquette girl demon?

İf you dont know what iş coquette is, here some ideas

Coquette Sins

Fandom: Hazbin Hotel

Pairings: Alastor | Lucifer | Husk | Angel Dust | Sir Pentious | Charlie | Vaggie | Cherri Bomb | Rosie | Carmilla | Vox | Valentino | Velvette | Adam | Lute | Emily | Saint Peter | Striker

C/TW: Sexual themes, swearing, some way longer than others, a lot of these are based off appearance sorry, made reader a sinner rather than demon since demon is very vague in the hellaverse lol, not proofread

In which how various Hazbin Hotel characters + Striker react to a demon who brings a fresh aesthetic to hell-aka, a coquette sinner!

Alastor

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ I can't say you'd be very intriguing to Alastor based off this aesthetic if I'm completely honest. He frequents Cannibal Town a lot-which while not coquette at all-the colour palette are closely similar and blends in together. Your look being more romantic and innocent looking in comparison however at a longer glance. So you wouldn't per say stand out at first glance, but even when he notices he isn't exactly intrigues. Hell is filled with many people who can look however they want, whatever way they want after all. So at first you're just another one of these poor sinners in this forever inferno. Somehow once you do get to know one another though, he picks up on certain mannerisms and certain things you like. One of the first being when he saw a little plushie you had purchased one day, now decorated with a neat little bow that matches with pretty much everything of you. From then on, he's sure that when he gifts you things, to keep an eye out for more specific things. It clashes with his aesthetic, but it's okay. Slowly he'll start to change your wardrobe to match his.

Lucifer

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lucifer doesn't think very highly of sinners, typical for the sin of Pride, but you're something new to him. He's well aware that human souls come in many different forms and that anyone can present themselves anyway they want, but coquette was a rare one. Anyone who resembled innocence, sweet romantics, and softness was often the target of bullying and harassment in hell-which serves him all the more reason to roll his eyes and dismiss a lot of sinners. Meeting you was a blessing in his eyes. Regardless of whatever judgements you may face you seemed to never stray away from who you are. He's become protective of you because of this. I mean he's protective of you regardless, you're very special to him after all, but you're basically a walking target for unnecessary bullying. Whenever he gifts you rubber duckies and carving of ducklings, he makes sure they are painted and decorated to fit in with your room. Because of your aesthetic by the way, you can match for date nights-which he loves very much!

Husk

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Husk wouldn't find you that intriguing either. He's been in hell for a very long time, seen lots of folk looking very different from one another. Nothing new. I think the longer he knows you though, the more he starts to question things. Nothing bad per say. It's more so because he starts to grow a crush on you and just now finds you more interesting. He'd definitely gift you things that match with your whole look. Especially plushies because come on, who doesn't like a good plushie.

Angel Dust

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ��� ⭒ Loves your look and aesthetic. It's like you're a different version of him-visually at least. You almost go hand in hand together in a sense. I can imagine two different first impressions of you based on appearance and just getting to know your personality on a very base level. One; he thinks you're one of Charlie's goody two shoes who don't know how to have fun but know how to ruin the fun of others. And two; if you're a dude here, someone he can have fun flirting with because don't you look like an inexperienced doll faced angel~

Sir Pentious

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ I think your contracting aesthetics is lowkey a recipe for a cute af looking couple not gonna lie. Sir Pentious would probably be very adoring of you. Don't you look so darling! I feel like out of the main cast, he's been in hell the longest and has definitley seen your type of look before-especially when he was alive. You kind of remind him of those porcelain dolls that would be on the front of store windows. It's probably the leading factor as to why he adores you and treats you as if you're made of porcelain. Even if you're a baddie, yoiu're his baddie-who's also his sweetheart darling.

Charlie

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Charlie loves your aesthetic and how you carry yourself. It feels like such a breath of fresh air in this hellscape she calls home. She's definitely the type to ask what your hobbies are and if she can tag along to whatever it is. Now she'd never change herself to please anyone ever but she would likely, just for fun, dress up and match with you sometimes. Oh but please return the favour every once and awhile! It would make her so happy!

Vaggie

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Vaggie as we know is from Heaven, so your type of look isn't new to her per say but it in a sense it does surprise her. This is hell, most people are usually clad in reds, pinks, and black. So your more, dare I say angelic, appearance is a mild surprise to her. She quickly gets over it though ass even in heaven the angels all didn't look like angels sometimes. Sure theirs halos and the feathery wings, but some peoples appearance mirrored some of the folk in hell. Vaggies own appearance and aesthetic clashing with heaven back in her angel days too. So she gets over her initial surprise. You're almost...nostalgic to her in a sense. She's definitely soft with you.

Cherri Bomb

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ You're both like polar opposites honestly. She at first has her reservations on you. Based on appearance and personality actually. She understands that this is hell and that everyone can look however they want and some just fall looking a certain way. However this hoe likes to fight, thrives in the night life, high party girl energy, and being that bitch. So you'd naturally clash but after some time, especially in a relationship with you, she wouldn't wish for you to change yourself at all. As even Cherri Bomb needs some relaxing down time every now and then. So going to you and your relaxing and romantic sweet nature is almost spa like to her.

Rosie

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Like Alastor, you wouldn't stick out much to her at first glance because she sees people like you in Cannibal Towne at like every turn. She's wise though, she knows theirs a lot more to you and that you even find a way to stick our visually-intentionally or not. Your romantic look is just darling to her! She has to meet you! And once you do, to say this woman is smitten is an understatement. During a gossip session with Alastor, she definitely mentions you. You're the pearl of her eye. Even as your bond deepens, her smitten ways with you don't fade one bit. Probably has a few garments specifically catered to you with her own Rosie taste. She loves to match, so she'll hope you'll agree to meet her in the middle somewhere.

Carmilla

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ She likes to think you're a romanticized version of her. You're...not exactly that but it's close enough. You're a breath of fresh air for her honestly. Being an overlord and especially of her status, she tends to get migraines a lot. So seeing you and your more romantic soft look is already easing her a bit. She'd love to dance with you sometimes honestly. A nice slow dance with fun twirls, perhaps a music box or old record player even, as you unwind together sweetly. If it's alright with you, she'd love to fashion you with some angelic ballerina inspired shoes. Matching is cliche to her, but I headcanon she's lowkey a sucker for that stuff. Plus, it would be great for you to protect yourself with if worse comes to worse.

Vox

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ You're an interesting one to him-especially since no one looks like you on his side of the Pentagram City. It excites him in a certain way-now get your head out of the gutter. It's a power thing. You look quite easy to manipulate, frail, weak, obedient-you could be a mindless doll. Getting you under contract would be easy, he tells himself. Of course, falling for you is the last thing he thought would come from this. But when that happens, you're no longer some doll he thinks he can control into being another one of his little workers. He can easily find out what type of music you listen to, what you like to do, furniture you may like, little shop items you always keep an eye out for, ect., He loves coming back home to you, or even when you visit him in his office. He's a stressed out guy with a lot on his plate. You're more soothing to him than you think.

Valentino

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Valentino being Valentino thought you were quite the delectable thing. It's as if you're begging to be ruined, honestly. He's of course quick to try to coerce you into at the very least having sex with him. He's charming, he knows how to use that and be sweet into getting people to trust him. Say you guys are in a romantic relationship though. You somehow managed to take this monsters heart, he's surprisingly not as rough with you vs if you were some one and done bitch he had instead. You look like too much of an angel for him to wanna break so soon. He's still rough and loves it when its rough, but I mean, what do you expect? It's Valentino. He definitely gets you lingerie that match your look. Loves either seeing you wringle in it beneath him or degrading him while you're on top. Believe it or not it's not all about sex with this guy though when it comes to you. When he's in one of his tantrum moods, you're like his own personal angel to give him a hug til he calms down enough to go do something else more level headed.

Velvette

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ She admires your dedication to your aesthetic, but I can't say she likes it very much. It's cute and with the correct look it can look quite fashionable, but she of course has her own standards and strong preferences. I can imagine that when you move in together, she has a love hate relationship with your guys shared massive walk in closet. One half screams Velvette, and the other half screams you. It's satisfying to see the difference in aesthetics, but also annoying because of the obvious clash. She puts up with it though. It's not all bad, seeing as sometimes you two trade outfits. Not often cuz again this woman is very of her own preferences and makes the effort to maintain her aesthetic as often as possible. It does happen though, as sometimes something from your closet catches her eye and she'll either borrow it or design something inspired based off it.

Adam

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Adam first saw you when you went to visit Heaven with Charlie and Vaggie. He at first didn't even know you were with them. You looked like you belonged in Heaven, he had thought you were an angel tagging along with their running around with Emily. He didn't immediately catch onto the lack of halo and feathered wings but that's besides the point. He actually probably went to bother you several hours before the trial. He didn't like any of the sinner souls or demons, but damn it-why do hell get a lot of the hot bitches? I mean yeah everyone in heaven is hot, but maybe he just has a thing for demon bitches, he doesn't know. Plus, it would probably be a good time to grill you and maybe tease you. What? Are you a wannabe angel? Is that why you look like that and came to argue for that hotel?

Lute

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Lute does not give a fuck because hello~you're a sinner. She first noticed you during an extermination. She had thought you were an angel actually, because of how you looked. She was initially startled and angry because why the hell would of the extermination angels just be out of uniform in a time like this? But she was very quick to catch onto the fact that you are not one of them so she moved to kill you. Ah but little miss angel wannabe, her words, is more vigilant than she thought. You don't get killed this extermination so when the angels are called back to return to Heaven, she glances back at the last place she saw you run into for shelter. She smirks to herself; you got lucky this year, angel wannabe. She almost wishes you see you again next year.

Emily

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ Emily would notice you with this Angel Dust character when they viewed Angel's night out during the trial in Heaven. You seemed to be friends with this group. Even though the focus wasn't on you, she found herself hoping to see you appear through the heavenly lens more frequently. You looked so adorable! Internally she nicknamed you Hell's Angel. She must remain professional and focus on the trial at hand though, which she very much does. She still wishes to get one more glimpse of you once the move on from viewing Angel Dust's night out though. Even when the trial ends, after she deals with the harsh reality she didn't now about, she hopes that Charlie's dreams come true for a chance to properly meet you in Heaven.

Saint Peter

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ This angel met you when you came up to the gates with Lucifer's daughter and her friend. When he realized who Charlie is and where this trio just came from, a part of himself silently wondered about you. You looked so...heavenly. You're really only visiting from Hell? Ha ha m-maybe theirs been some sort of mistake. You look like you belong up in heaven. Oh well. Eventually he get's to actually talk with you of course. It's not long but it's something. He almost feels foolish for thinking Hell wouldn't have sinners and demons who have certain aesthetics and preferences. Heaven has those things, why wouldn't hell have it? Maybe hell isn't the shitty eternal hellfire he and many other winners believed it out to be. I like to think that Peter when he's not wearing his robes, has a pastel filled wardrobe. Real soft boy energy. So if you ever get redeemed or can somehow be together, bc this man was whipped almost immediately, you'd match pretty well together.

BONUS!!

Striker

𓈒ㅤׂㅤ𐙚 ࣪ ⭒ You intrigued Striker a little bit at first glance. With a raised brow he watched as you smiled sweetly at him and waved before continuing on your way. He doesn't like interacting with the sinners much but he knows enough about them that you being you makes you a target for bullying and harassment. He naturally keeps his distance regardless and doesn't think of you again until he actually sees you again. By the time you end up dating, many compromises need to be made. First of all, sinners can't leave the Pride ring so he can't bring you home to the wrath ring. So he often makes trips to the pride ring to visit you, at some point your home becomes his home before either of you realize it. It kinda makes him feel off-he stands out like a sore thumb in your place. But he tries to not get you place dirty and tries to make sure he's not totally bloody when he shows up.

IM SO SORRY THIS TOOK OVER A WHOLE MONTH LOVLEY STAR! I had no idea how to write about various characters reacting to a coquette!sinner!Reader without having so much overlap and I just evbsfvhsbk-

Here it is, finally TvT sorry for taking forever. Thank you for your patience!

[majorasnightmare]

taps mic

minthara

*uproarious applause*

okay so like. obviously everyone here knows and understands mintharas romance route is fucking incredible, like we are ALL on the same page here and telepathically communicating our agreement. shes a compelling fascinating character with a fantastic blend of firmly held political beliefs and hypocrisy and surprising mindfulness that makes her a thrill in any party, playing good OR evil.

her character is absolutely magnetic, made all the more enthralling by her stellar voice work and delightful party banter

so. we all know why WE love minthara. but something I find equally engaging is why SHE likes US. the way the companions experience desire is already more interesting and in depth than a lot of older, more familiar rpgs that have to make sure companions are equally approachable regardless of how exactly you spent those many hours in character creation, with actions and dialogue choices capable of boosting their opinions and engaging their romantic interests being accessible more or less regardless of playstyle. this is what gave rise to the dreaded "player-sexual" term: a romancable npcs who seems utterly devoid of sexuality or desire EXCEPT for your player character specifically, regardless of gender options selected at the very beginning. the dialogue options presented are so personalized and plot relevant as to reveal nothing at all about their lives outside of the narrative, and any ambient party chatter is loose and vague enough as to avoid potentially turning an interested player away. the end result is an npc who is technically canonically bisexual, but avoids engaging with sexuality or desire in any meaningful way and only expresses that bisexuality exclusively through the fact the player can choose either of two gender settings at creation before romancing them.

minthara, and all of the origin companions, are NOT that, thank GOD. the degrees to which companions openly discuss their desires vary, but are nonetheless fairly consistently present, but we arent here for them. we are here for lolths specialest princess and her 4d8 smite not including paralyzing critical damage. and minthara specifically is a fun choice for analysis because she is Loudly and Proudly Menzoberranzan. which means WE get to play with drow gender politics and cultural influence on the expression of gendered desire! YIPPEE

okay so the biggest misunderstanding I get repeated by people who kill minthara at the grove is that she hates men. which is crazy because, last time I checked, her personalized greetings actually only check for being a high elf of any gender, being a drow man, or being a drow woman, and everyone else gets a more generic true soul greeting. and i KNOW most of these people arent playing male drow. she MIGHT call female true souls sister offhandedly when she implores you to attack the grove, but admittedly its been a while since I checked her dialogue and this is an off-the-top-of-my-head ramble and not a cited analysis. anyways back on topic. minthara is pretty openly biased against drow men, specifically, which continues to a lesser degree even after being rescued from moonrise, but is highly contextual and pointedly SPECIFIC. minthara does not, in my experience, make off the cuff derogatory comments towards men as a general thing. she has menzoberranzan politics and ideology, for sure, but her phrasing around those tends to be more careful (saying the honor of matricide better belongs to a daughter than a son, which really only tracks through the lens of menzoberranzan politics and less so through a lens of generalized man hatred).

something else that i think gets widely overlooked, (and this will be relevant), is that minthara is funny. she has a very flat deadpan style of humor that relies on a rugpull at the end for its punchlines. why exactly is this relevant, you may ask? well as i was discussing how minthara tends to specifically demean drow men, you may have thought to yourself "wait, but minthara says LOTS of rude things to my male party members ALL the time!" well. shes literally joking. and that isnt me speculating, either! if, playing as origin gale, you recruit minthara and spend your playthrough interacting with her, and survive to the epilogue party, you get a dialogue option remarking on how she consistently calls gale "the wizard". in that dialogue branch, minthara goes on to explain she has been consistently paying close attention to gale AND the kind of person she is, and says she does things like refuse to use him name SPECIFICALLY because she KNOWS hes taking it as teasing and that she enjoys doing that! we know gale tends to interpret minthara's harsher dialogue more positively just by his reaction to her recruitment, and this dialogue confirms its a two way street for them. her calling gale a third son after he asks if shes going to say something awful? thats them playing with each other. canonically. and this is consistent with ALL of the male companions! she playfully insults astarion by calling him a pleasure servant, knowing astarion prides himself on vanity and his good looks, and astarion responds equally playfully about how shes inadvertently complimented how beautiful he is, knowing she dislikes saying nice things so openly. minthara teases wyll about mizoras flirtatious nature and her MO of seducing people into pacts specifically because she knows he prides himself on being a slow burn romantic, and then teasingly compliments him by saying a failure to seduce him would be a bruise on her pride (revealing that she thinks highly enough of wyll to consider him a prize worth bragging about, even in the hypothetical context of an impartial one night stand).

mintharas FUNNY and while she rarely lets herself openly admire others, she DOES try to joke with them! understanding this about her recontextualizes a LOT of her party banter and makes a lot of her interactions more genuinely wholesome. the only male party member minthara actively dislikes is minsc, and its explicitly because he repeatedly refers to ass so often (in the context of butt kicking but. it IS a lot), and her tone there implies it has an objectifying feeling to it when minthara overhears the things minsc says.

minthara also openly admires gortash, repeatedly and without prompting, and she admires him specifically for a lot of the traits she finds enjoyable period. hes competent, pragmatic, and ambitious, but willing to compromise and ally himself with others if it suits him, and i feel like a more quote-unquote "misandrist" minthara would not so blatantly admire such a man for the very traits that allows one to excel in Lolthite society without making at least SOME passing mention of gender, at the very least something closer to her comments regarding dolors matricide. as far as ive experience, minthara only really brings up her explicitly gendered distaste ONLY in regards to drow men. minthara is generally fairly good at contextualizing her own experiences to the culture she was raised in, and avoiding generalizing those experiences to other cultures. shes MUCH more likely to assume something is specific to her home than assume it to be universally true, and i feel like this is especially true regarding gender politics. as far as i can recall, her only slipup is referring to the ruling body of baldurs gate as matriarchs before correcting herself to patriars, and pointedly those are both highly gendered terms associated with positions of political and familial power.

this has been a whole lotta Post about why minthara does not in fact Hate All Men, but thats honestly because theres just more to discuss there. minthara openly admires and desires women, and unlike some of her subtler character traits, minthara being sapphic is one of the few things people can pick up on right out the gate. there simply isnt as much to say here that doesnt veer into more cut and dry upfront aspects of mintharas desire, rather its how she engages with and desires masculinity that has the caveats here. mintharas desires in women are what she finds baseline attractive: she enjoys a go getter. she finds ambition and hungry power seeking to be attractive, and ruthless pragamaticism is a major selling point for her, and admirable all on its own. she enjoys when someone is coldly calculating, and she thinks its hot when you kill people and dont give a shit. none of these desires are gendered, rather, they are simply traits more common and encouraged among the women she grew up and around. these are not innately feminine traits, but they are culturally feminine in mintharas experience. in short, gortash is admirable because he acts like any other admirable drow woman minthara would find back home. minthara understands both of these things to be true: that this is not inherently gendered but simultaneously how SHE expresses her gender, and furthermore are culturally gendered from a society she admires and misses in equal measure (even if she no longer agrees with the underlying theocratic reasoning behind it).

things that are culturally feminine in menzoberranzan are her baseline point of desire in seeking a partner, and she seeks those traits in potential partners regardless of gender. however, things that are culturally masculine in menzoberranzan are general traits she finds distasteful. the gendered politics of menzoberranzan are such that the gendered role of a drow man is one of being a sycophant, one who bolsters his own social standing by attaching himself to a powerful woman and then people-pleasing enough to avoid being discarded. The role of being a drow man is one of debasement, victimization, asskissing, and servitude, with the permissible reactions to this role being a kind of desperate ambition to carve a bit more breathing room within the box without meaningfully breaking free of it (see: most wizards being drow men). And minthara almost universally dislikes all of that. However, something thats culturally masculine in AND out of menzoberranzan is a trait minthara DOES desire in her partners, with it even being one of her key emotional lynchpins: protectiveness. A lot of male drow consorts are expected to both go out of their way to protect and give their lives for their matriarchs, and the biggest threat to a matron mother is usually only other matron mothers, and the agents they move through. a consort CAN be weaponized as a threat in this way, but its more like poaching, in that a consort is promised a better position with a higher ranking house in return for aiding the destruction of his current house. In this way Menzoberranzan maintains its culture of duplicitious intrigue and discouraging vulnerability, while simultaneously having an admirable model of masculinity one can idealize in a culture that actively subjugates men as a gendered role.

The safest thing a drow man can be without being pathetic to the point of disdain, is a loyal guard dog. And thats something minthara openly craves in her partner, having someone to guard her back and protect her from threats, and more importantly someone to guard her vulnerability. minthara admires the culture of menzoberranzan, and views her childhood (and the traumas it inflicted) positively because of her pragmatic acknowledgement of her skillset, knowing that it would not be nearly so keenly focused and practiced had she not grown up the specific way she had. Simultaneously, the loneliness and paranoia it instilled in her is something she desperately wants relief from, and only really seeks that out from a romantic partner.

Mintharas bisexuality is so compelling to me because of how her desires are so couched in her heritage while she avoids removing them from that context. The things she wants, what she finds attractive, the traits that take her from a passing fascination to a deeply committed relationship, are gendered in a way that would make it difficult for her to be satisfied with the average gender conforming individual from her home city. And this is more or less confirmed by Minthara only really mentioning one actual lover, having a plethora of suitors instead. Minthara desires a partner who has to come off to her as feminine to be attractive, but masculine to fully commit to them, and that particular set of traits would be hard to reliably find in a society where gender dynamics are harshly enforced and strictly stratified. Its a very distinctly bi-and-pan experience where even if you DO find a partner thatd hypothetically pass as a het couple, you do so in such a way that fails to conform to the gendered norms of your partnership and STILL manages to trip flags for being queer even if your literally a m-f couple.

Its a deeply lonely experience that echoes so much of mintharas character, that i find it difficult to engage with her narrative without coming back to HOW minthara experiences attraction in the first place, what she wants and how she wants it and who she wants it from and when she feels shes allowed to have it. Her romance route is endlessly rewarding to me because of it, engaging with this deeper level of her character and her desires and how she expresses them and how Minthara herself interacts with gender roles in the context of drow expressions of romance and sexuality (not even getting to her alurlssrin dialogue! an eilistraean expression of love!!) and its just SO immediately interesting and engaging that even though minthara has a full act LESS of general content, she manages to be equally as dynamic and in depth as most of the origin companions.

i just. love minthara and i love the way she loves.

[cannibalbuffe]

hi! I've honestly been craving some qpr headcanons with Alastor as someone who's also aroace! The concept piques my curiosity so much considering most of the stuff with him is purely romantic (no offense to those writers, I just wanna see more qpr stuff! :])

Of course! But do forgive me, annon, I got so carried away with this 😅. I just really like Alastor a lot.

I ended up writing some backstory to your relationship first, but I highlighted the start of the proper qpr headcanons if you feel like skipping that.

Obligatory I'm sorry if this is ooc, I'm still getting used to writing about these characters. This is also all based on my own perception of him.

(Also, I am aware that qprs are very different from one another and there is no single mold for a qpr, I'm just going off of what I think it would be like with Alastor.)

Uhh, I also finished this at 1 AM, so forgive any mistakes. And I'm pretty sure I changed the verb conjugations(? Is this how you say that in English?) from present to past at some point. Sorry. Enough with the A/Ns now. Hope you enjoy!

Alastor queerplatonic relationship headcanons

(gender neutral reader, Alastor x reader)

‼️Trigger-warning‼️: mentions of cannibalism (not graphic), a single mention of tongue-kissing and making out (spoiler: he doesn't want either of those things in this work.) Usage of the word queer, but not as a slur. Alastor is a grandpa and you have to explain LGBTQ+ stuff to him, but he gets it.

› At first, before you were close, it's likely that he didn't see you as an equal.

› Truly, in his eyes, it seems not really is his equal. He is the most powerful overlord in hell and he knows it.

› Unless you are someone he holds in high regard (and this is mostly based on vibes, barely anything to do with power, as we can see by how he is with Lucifer of all people) before your first meeting, like Zestial, you won't be on equal footing at first.

› You only really start getting close when his perception of you shifts.

› You respect his boundaries, you are interesting, you and him share quite a few interests (or not really, but you're at least interested in hearing about his), and you're, surprisingly, pretty wise and mature.

› And caring. I personally believe he would be drawn to that in a way that he may not even understand fully- or realize it at all.

› Still, the point is. He respects you, and you respect him.

› (And not in the way some others do, where they're only "respectful" out of fear. You would act like this regardless of his power.)

› This, by the way, is important. You don't treat him like a superior, but as an equal.

› You'd think someone like him would love to be treated like a superior, and it's true. He very much does.

› But he has to admit to himself that it does feel nice whenever someone isn't shaking in their boots and can hold really good conversations with him while still not being pushy, annoying or just generally disrespectful.

› Anyways.

› Ever since you became friends (which took long), one could say, you just kept becoming closer and closer.

› You were the first one to be vulnerable with him, of course. It happened on accident, but you trusted him enough for that.

› You were also the first one to share any more intimate information with him. Something you wouldn't tell just anyone.

› Between this, your conversations, and maybe even helping each other around (honestly, he probably helps you more than you do him, but you always offer it and always in a sweet way, never condescending, and he appreciates that.)

› He eventually felt more comfortable sharing personal things with you too.

› (He may have distanced himself a bit when he realized this, but it was short-lived. You can't be without each other for so long, and you were pretty upset at his suddenly withdrawal. You may not have mentioned it to him, but he could tell, and as much as he hated to admit it, it hurt him to see you sad because of him.)

› This marks the beginning of the path toward your queerplatonic relationship.

› I mean, you didn't initially label it as such, but it definitely started there.

› Surprisingly, I feel like the first one to ever do any sort of affectionate gesture towards the other was him.

› You knew he didn't like to be touched, so you didn't.

› But! He just started getting more and more comfortable with touching you. At first it was hands on your shoulders, or putting his arm over them.

› I can even see a head pat or two, which he probably passed off as some sort of joke the first few times, but, if you liked them so much, just became a thing he does to you.

› And then one day you, completely absent-mindedly, intertwined your arm with his while walking around.

› When you noticed you had done it and he hadn't said anything, you questioned him about it.

› "Alastor, I'm sorry I didn't ask... is this alright?"

› "This?... Oh, you mean the arms? Ah, dear, don't worry, if it weren't I would have simply told you so!"

› From them on you only got more and more physically affectionate with each other. At first you would usually be the one to start it, but eventually you were both shockingly equal in doing so.

› (You still would always ask if you could touch him beforehand, but after a while he just gave you a free-pass.)

› Not a lot in public, though. Mostly just hand holding, or intertwining arms (if in public, that is.)

› Alastor also was so protective of you. You were the person he treasured most, after all.

› Well, demon.

› Even if you told him you were going to be okay, he would watch out nonetheless. He couldn't afford to lose you, not when he's never trusted and cared for a person this much.

› You two also cuddle a lot. You were the first one to ask, as usual, but now both of you feel weird sleeping alone.

› Alastor loves being the big spoon, if you're doing that.

› But he is also quite fond of occasionally being the little spoon, although he wouldn't be caught dead admitting it.

› A hobby you two do together is cooking. Cooking with Alastor is fun... especially if you're okay with cannibalism.

› But if you don't like that, he won't insist, of course.

› He's pretty good at cooking, though! If you're also good at it, then great. If not, he'll tease you about it (in a friendly way), but still teach you.

› On teasing, he teases you quite a bit, but never in a mean way. If you don't mind, of course.

› You also may tease him occasionally, but he doesn't appreciate you teasing him in public.

› The two of you also have a good amount of inside jokes that probably confuse the hell out of the others.

› Kissing... well. I don't really see Alastor as the type who would enjoy kissing on the lips too much.

› Tongue is out of question for him, as well as any sort of making out, but otherwise... if you like it, he can do that for you.

› He might actually like a peck or two. An acquired taste for him. Don't overdo it, though.

› Of course, him being from the 1930s and not very familiar with anything LGBTQ+ related, he would, at first, be somewhat confused by the request.

› You would probably have to explain to him that nothing is inherently romantic, especially not if you don't want it to be.

› "A kiss on the lips? Well... we aren't courting, Y/n."

› "We can put our own meanings to things, though. Would you like this kiss to be romantic?"

› "Definitely not!"

› "Well, me neither. So it's not!"

› "... That is very sound logic! I can't believe I've never thought of this myself."

› Kisses on the rest of the face are something else, though. He does enjoy it whenever you kiss him on the cheek. He himself might occasionally kiss you on the forehead.

› But overall I don't think he's big on kissing.

› If you want to really solidify that you're in a queerplatonic relationship you'd also have to explain what that means to him, sorry.

› Again, he's old and not up to date with things.

› Thankfully he understands things easily.

› "I see... I suppose we do have quite the queer relationship, don't we? And it is certainly platonic. I don't see why not!"

› Going back to vulnerability. It will never feel fully natural for him to just be vulnerable with you — or anyone else, for the matter.

› (In case you couldn't tell, he's using the word queer as meaning odd (and doing a little pun. You know. Because it's a. Queerplatonic relationship. Queer. Hehehehe), as it defies the norm of what a platonic relationship usually looks like, despite being one.)

› But you know him well enough at this point to recognize whenever there's something going on with him.

› And if you show concern and give him enough time he will share whatever it is with you.

› If it's not anything too big he might even reach out to you first.

› He can also read you like a book and gives surprisingly good advice, and is also pretty good at comforting you.

› You are the only person allowed at his studio while he's live on the radio. You usually read as he speaks in the background, his voice is very relaxing. He enjoys having you around.

› He's also particularly gentlemanly to you, more than to the others. When you're with him you never have to open a single door yourself, for one. If it's raining, he'll hold the umbrella for the two of you. When walking together on the sidewalk, he's always on the side closest to the street instead of you.

› You two often go out for dinner. If you also fancy some cannibalism, he will definitely show you his favorite restaurants around. If not he will just pick the best non-cannibal places (but you know those are not his favorites, haha.)

› He just cares about you a lot, even if it took him long to admit (it may have seemed fast-paced during this, but Alastor is someone who really takes long to get close to.)

› And you care about him lot too!

› (And you're probably never going to be in a life-threatening situation again, at least not at the hands of most demons. Who would ever want trouble with Alastor?)

[firefly--bright]

ur so pretty.

jean kirstein x fem!reader, modern a.u.

summary ; jean liked to drive alone, to sit in his thoughts for a while. it's getting harder to think when he can't stop himself from thinking about you, though.

warnings ; jean is canonically left handed (yes this is a warning)

taglist ; @mrsnobodynobody , @hopeless-anti-romantic , @holding-infinity-and-a-book , @berrijam , @jeanscremebrulee , @kivernova , @imgayandshesanime , @potaho3frog , @katestrophes , @cherrypieyourface , @xakilicious , @moonmalice shoot me and ask or fill the linked form to join!

✿ masterlist is in pinned post! ✿ enter my taglist! ✿ requests are open! ✿

middle tile art creds - @nahoiya on instagram!

✿

jean liked to drive alone.

even before he got his driver's license, he'd made a plan of being the designated driver, researching different car models and gushing over the sleek designs, shiny coloured metal, and all of the features they had to offer. of course, he'd never actually buy the more expensive ones no matter how attached he was to them when he was a young teenager.

no, instead he drove comfortably in his mother's sedan that had gone through too much. there was a particularly harsh dent on the passenger side - the paint slightly chipped from when some asshole tried to park dangerously close to his car.

regardless, his first addition to the car was now long weathered under the uncontrollable temperatures - a bumper sticker he had bought when he first got his learners license, reading "LEFT-HANDERS HAVE RIGHTS TOO!"

not his wisest decision. Connie never let him live it down. speaking of, his friend also gave him a car hanger he had made himself, consisting of a lego version of jean that was messily glued onto a hoodie string. marco commemorated jean getting a drivers license by getting him a keychain of a mini lucky 8 ball, and Sasha had presented him with what he was sure was a lifetime supply of the little tree air fresheners.

despite all the years jean had put that poor car through, it drove as good as new - something you always praised him for.

getting into the driver's seat, he strapped on his seatbelt, turning the keys. the car started with a tremble, and jean threw his bag on the backseat before taking off to marco and his shared apartment just a little ways off-campus, providing for a nice, quiet ride that jean preferred after a long day. he liked to think about the day, mentally note everything down before having to open the door to his house again.

he bopped his head to the tune of the song you had introduced to him, thinking about how you had called him in the middle of the day after your classes had ended, in disbelief of how incompetent your classmates were.

"i mean, I'm not doing all the work, and I'm not going to take credit for it either, but I'm just annoyed that no-one even tried to participate. we're all doing this for a grade, at least act like you deserve one!" you rambled, and jean could hear you speed-walking through campus, your voice being carried away by the wind. he could hear each huff you took, and tried not to smile to himself as he sat back in the library, getting comfortable.

he hummed. "who are these people?"

you breathed out an annoyed laugh, "I'm sure you know them. this guy named Floch and this girl named Virginia?"

jean cringed, "I hate people that name their kids after states. be more creative-"

"exactly!" you said, and jean swore he saw the way you were smiling, a mental picture of your eyes bright and the apples of your cheeks pressed up against the corner of your eyes, smiling widely.

jean stopped at the red light, the song playing through his car, and he tried not to think about how you had come to him one night, almost in tears about it, claiming you put too much baking powder in your cinnamon rolls to the point where they had a "weird pineappley bite-back kinda taste," in your words, which he surprisingly understood. and then, how when it was just the two of you later that night, you admitted how much you missed cooking for Sasha after she had moved, and jean took you in his arms.

"wanna shit-talk about niccolo?" he had asked with a grin, resting his cheek on your head with one arm around your shoulders. he could feel them move as you laughed.

"no, I'm good. I'm glad he gets her," you said.

he paused to let you complete your thought, but your voice never presented itself. "but?" he pushed, knowing there was an answer.

he tried not to think about how well he knew you altogether, as he accelerated, his hands on the steering wheel. but he couldn't help himself and his mind seemed to like how hot his cheeks grew when he thought back on it.

"but...I don't know, I guess...I feel kind of lonely? i mean, I love sash-"

"mhm"

"and I'm very happy for her-"

"of course."

"i just, feel like the place is too empty and I'm just reminded that I'm alone."

he pauses again. "you're not alone, though." you lift your head from his shoulder, resting it on the back of the couch, your eyes looking at his and he feels himself shudder under the warmth of it all. youre looking for an answer in him and he gives it to you without even having to think about it, and he tries not to think about how he'd give you all the answers to all the questions there are to ask if you were the one to ask them. he tries not to think about how you wouldnt ask him, though, because he knows you too well to know that you wouldn't ask much of him other than that he should be himself.

"you're...well, you have me. can't get rid of that."

you laugh, settling back into his arm, and jean tried not to think about how your hair smells like vanilla. "i don't want to get rid of you," you admit, shrugging, like it's an easy thing for you to say.

no matter how hard jean tries not to think about it, he can't stop. he can't stop thinking about you and how his ears went red over when you gave him coffee from your own mug and he thinks about how even then, he had tried not to think. not to think that you had drank the same coffee from the same cup and your lipstick stained the rim of it and how his own lips grazed it as well and then, before he could stop himself, he thinks about kissing you.

another red light and another shift in the music, playing the soft tunes that he now knew by heart. he shifted in his seat, trying to get more comfortable, and his thoughts went back to you.

he tried getting them not to, though. he tried thinking about how he'd have to call his mother tonight because he hadn't done so since the night before, and then he though about how marco had told him that groceries needed to be bought, and then he thought about how you had said you liked those off-brand marshmallows and he had made fun of you for liking them.

but you defended them with your life and he ultimately gave in, buying you a pack, and tried not to think about how you got excited over it.

dammit. he turned the familiar left, switching his indications on and off, checking his rearview. he cleared his throat when he tried not to think about how you had used the mirror to apply some lipstick on your lips before heading into the party Reiner was throwing for his birthday. he tried not to think about the domesticity of it all - marco, Connie and sasha had already piled out and you wanted to help jean park into a tough spot. after parking, however, you climbed back into your seat and fixed your hair in the mirror as jean turned his keys to the side, removing his seatbelt and grabbing his phone from the dashboard fully prepared to get out the moment you were done.

he looked at you. he tried not to, but he couldn't help it - the tip of your ring fingers wiped off the excess lipstick from the corner of your lips, and then you leaned back, making no attempts to move.

jean had cleared his throat, trying to get your attention.

"y'know," you started, still seated comfortably in your seat that he was sure you had claimed since the beginning of college, "when I was small, I would always get motion sick in the car on roadtrips. it was uncomfortable, and most of the times I had to sit and try not to complain to much about my mom's driving," you said, breathing out a laugh.

jean blinked, confused. "do- do you feel sick right now? i have a bag, i think, you can th-"

"no, no, I'm fine. I'm okay. i was trying to say that you make me feel comfortable. comfortable enough to complain and take my time, ask for help if I ever need any." you say. he tried not to think about the way your words shape him, about how if he could give anyone the power to build himself back up again should he melt under your gaze - it would be you.

and then you got out of the car before jean could open the door for you, and he was left in his seat, with a storm in his heart as you opened the door for him, nodding your head for him to get out with a smile.

and jean tried not think about how his hands are shaking slightly as he pulls into a familiar street lined with familiar apartment buildings and neon orange street lights as he stops infront of an all the more familiar gate. he stops only for a minute before his hand is reaching for his phone and he doesn't think - this he can do because his mind shuts off when he hears your voice, your smile, your-

"hey, jean."

the way your say his name makes his shoulders relax. "hey. I'm downstairs."

it's familiar. all of it - the way you smile and open your curtains a little to take a peak of his car, turning around and saying "I'll be there," into the phone before keeping it, how jean's heartbeat lulls to a softer version of itself, relaxing completely as he waits for your company to climb down the stairs. the only thing he can think about is you.

maybe this is what his mother meant when she told him stories about love, about how when she met his now step-father, she never felt like she had to keep an act up. about when sasha told him how niccolo made her feel like she could act without permission, without limits as herself. and then he thinks about himself, and how thats all he's ever felt with you, because thinking about you comes so naturally to him and being around you makes him feel more familiar to himself than he's ever felt before.

and before he can stop himself - not that he'd want to - he thinks, hes in love with you.

three familiar knocks find their way to his ears and he looks at where you're bending down to meet the window of the passenger seat. if he wasn't so busy thinking about you, he'd have opened the door for you, but your smile is so blinding that all he can do is open the door from the inside with a smile of his own.

it's too familiar, he thinks, as you slide into your designated seat again, strapping yourself in and turning your head to him.

and he doesn't stop himself when he says, "I love you." out loud into the silence of his familiar car.

your smile turns softer and jean notices everything about you, really, but in this moment notes how your shoulders also relax, how you breathe out softly and rest your head on the seat.

"i love you too."

[silentcryracha]

❍ ‗ SKZ + What they love on you (fashion) ‗ ❍

Pairings : OT8 x reader

Genre/warnings : skz simp agenda. Fluff, lots of compliments and sweet boys. no smut but it's definitely suggestive (18+), boobs and ass are mentioned and reader is female presenting

Summary : Which items of clothing (or related things) I think would drive the boys insane when you're wearing them

Word count : 1.8k

A/n : None <3

masterlist

ps: No beta'd. Do NOT repost on other socials. Leave feedback if you feel like it, otherwise enjoy! ♡︎

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Chan ‗ ❍

- This man would adore you regardless. He's one of those guys who would find it 10x times more sexy or romantic seeing you just being yourself in an intimate setting, like a house, some sort of trip, going grocery shopping and so on. Plus 10+ points if you happen to be wearing something of his.

- Yeah, wear one of his hoodies or shirts and he's already GONE. He's a (simp)le man. Or his beanie, jackets, scarf, anything that could look good on you tbh.

- But hear me out: also his accessories like his famous stay bracelet, or you could even be lovey doveys and share one earring each.

- NAIL POLISH!! Let him paint your nails for you and do silly little designs on them! You'd have so much fun, he'd giggle so much and end you playing with your hands at random times reminiscing the memories.

- Now onto what would ACTUALLY get him going: I think that either a really really nice dress (like a cocktail or party dress) would make Chan go CRAZYYY

- Bonus points if it's black and hugs your body perfectly. Even more if some skin is showing. V neck, shoulders, low back. He LOVES seeing you dolled up and confident and would make sure to boost the energy as much as he can because you deserve it and he wants to make his girl the most beautiful in the world <3

- Okay now hear me out, seems quite specific but random at the same time BUT, what about side boob. You know those loose sleeveless shirts/tank tops? Like the sporty ones? If you ever wore one of those he would NOT be able to control himself. Imagine if you're not wearing anything underneath tho 🫠

- The side boob + nipple shadow peeking...oh he's HARD and only an emergency fuck can fix it for him I fear

Minho ‗ ❍

- Anything that shows your skin is free real estate for this man. Shoulder? Neck? Collarbones? He's gonna BITE.

- Oh but not only. Imagine wearing something that exposes your legs (and maybe some thighs) like shorts or a mini dress, skirts and so on.

- He's so unhinged like he would purposefully drop his keys or something and leave a bite on the side of your thigh when he crunches down. If he's feeling romantic he'd go for a lil kiss but his goal is to make you flustered nonetheless.

- Speaking of touch and kisses: he'd make sure to get his mouth literally everywhere. Picking up your hand to linger his lips on your palm, back, wrist or forearm, fingers.

- Moving your hair to the side to kiss the back and side of your neck. Yeah 🤒

- In general I don't think he has specific preferences in fashion? I just think that he'd love to see you confident and comfortable in whatever you want to wear.

Changbin ‗ ❍

- You're either his little precious porcelain doll or his emo bad bitch. Nor in between. Man CAN do both and can HAVE both.

- I feel like Changbin (like all the others tbh) would be happy seeing you comfortable and confident. Which doesn't necessarily needs to tie with fashion or your looks.

- BUT☝🏻 he'd be a sucker for a good aesthetic look. He'd lose his mind fr, worshipping the ground you walk on, being loud about how HOT his girlfriend his and all that. As he should!

- As I was saying, he'd like both someone who's extremely feminine and delicate, doll like almost. Soft make up, lots of girly clothes, dresses, skirts, stockings, cute hats and accessories.

- But also someone who gives off the same 'dark/emo' vibe that he gives off at first glance. Lots of black, leather, dark colors, laces, a stronger make up, some edgy accessories.

- And a resting bitch face that would make anyone run but NOT HIM! You'd look like a cupcake to him regardless. He'd go around gushing and fighting his cute aggression for you by just existing.

- Now, a little treat that would most likely (and fortunately for you😵‍💫) get him turned on would be a GOOD pair of jeans. Either some very tight jeans or some cargo style ones, as long as they show off the delicious curve of your ass he's gone. It's literally over for him.

- Trust him to be EMBARRASSINGLY turned on by this, to the point where he'd ask you to wear some just for him, he'd buy them for you and so on. Your body and your ass are already his constant thought and motivation while he works out so might as well fuel his own delulu fantasies by providing the material, am I right?

Hyunjin ‗ ❍

- Once again, he loves you as you are and would be happy just knowing you comfortable in your own skin. But that won't stop him to try and dress you up like his personal model.

- He would never force on you something, especially if it was something that would make you uncomfortable. But he would give you some suggestions here and there, on how to mix and match some items, which colors he thinks compliment you the most.

- He would love to see you being so confident and happy in the results, too. Just like a painter adding details to his masterpiece.

- I lowkey feel like, since we got Mr. Romantic and artsy boy on our hands, I kinda feel like he'd lose if he saw you wearing something more... ethereal? Like a specifically made dress. It could be the soft palette, the delicacy of laces and pearls, the perfect way that the draping compliments your body and falls perfectly.

- His own personal princess. Yes, I think that he would love to either have you as his personal hot catwalk style model or a literal princess that came out of a painting.

- Speaking of art. You're also his muse, of course. And few things to him are equally as aesthetically pleasing as certified turn on for him like your chest.

- He does love lingerie on you, BUT, if you really want to make him drop on his knees on the spot, just wear one of those pretty corsets. You know, the ones with laces, and ribbons. This is for the bedroom though.

- He'd get equally as horny with any type of garment that gave the same effect though. Like a sweetheart neckline paired with a good bra. A low v neckline dress, a slightly unbuttoned plain shirt. Oh yes.

- Hyune tits man agenda going strong and I'll die on this hill.

Jisung ‗ ❍

- He's a homebody. Being at home and domestic is probably his favorite place after being on stage. I feel like his perfect day would be chilling and having fun at home, where you're most free and comfortable.

- Which is why, while I of course think that Jisung would foam at the mouth with you being all sexy and dressed up, he'd as easily get turned on by a simple home outfit.

- Yoga pants showing your ass, shorts showing your thighs, long oversized t shirts showing legs AND thighs. Bonus if the stuff is his. Bonus X2 if you're not wearing anything underneath.

- Yes absolutely that's enough for him. He loves a nice put up together outfit but would that allow him to take you on the nearest surface and make an absolute mess of you without a care in the world? Probably not, so there you go, you got yourself a winner

- You wearing his old glasses (since he doesn't need them anymore) or even your own glasses get him turned on. Don't ask, he's a pervert.

Felix ‗ ❍

- Felix seems like he has a taste for expensive things. Especially fashion and accessories wise.

- He'd drool seeing you sport a very high fashion item, like peculiarly cut out dress or jacket, something quite unique. He loves seeing you looking like a literal model straight out of a magazine. And would love even more to match with you.

- The matching would be valid for the accessories too. You would share pretty much everything, from the earrings, rings, bracelets, necklaces, watches, hats, gloves and so on. He'd insist to have always something matching with you.

- In a more intimate setting though, something that you can never go wrong with are pretty sleeping gowns, lingerie sets, silky and lacy pajamas. Something very girly, dollish, delicate, almost innocent. Strictly in pale and pastel colors. He would love to buy them for you, too. As his personal treat.

- The sight of you wearing such a delicate but expensive as fuck bralette and panties that he knows he could rip off of you with his own teeth just makes him nearly cum in his pants.

Seungmin ‗ ❍

- Seungmin would get off on the confidence that you show to others. Whether it is a façade or you're really just a bad bitch, he finds it extremely hot.

- He goes crazy when you dress up smartly, elegantly, and maybe, just a tad provocative.

- A normal blouse, elegant. But that shows just enough cleavage when you move or bend in certain ways. Cigarette pants perfectly ironed, peofessional. But that make the curve of your ass so delicious. A normal pair of black Louboutines, with that sexy red heels.

- It makes him hard because he feels superior in knowing exactly what's behind that façade and that he's the only one that you'd be willing to drop it for.

- Extra points if he saw you getting ready and you're the only two people in the room who know that a pretty, lacy red lingerie set is hiding under all those elegant and composed clothes. You'd get him thinking about it all night.

- I also feel like he'd have a thing for your legs being shown off and your nais being done, maybe even when you're wearing a particular perfume. Maybe HIS, perfume.

Jeongin ‗ ❍

- Jeongin would be a sucker for you acting cool. Like standing there with some sporty clothes and a pair of sunglasses and a nice perfume. That's enough for him to simp HARD.

- He'd love to go shopping together and purposefully buy stuff that you could easily switch and match with each other. You're boyfriend and girlfriend yes but you are COOL boyfriend and girlfriend ykwim.

- In a more formal setting, he particularly loves when you wear dresses that have low cuts. Somewhere. Whether is a frontal low cut, a side low cut, a back low cut, or a high slit on the bottom part.

- The idea that all it would take for him to take it off you is just a flick of his fingers gets him CRAZY. Especially if they are dresses that require to not wear a bra.

- All that bare back, shoulders, neck, chest...idk man in his opinion it should all be covered in kisses, licks and bruises IMMEDIATELY.

- Bonus if you wear a high slit dress and you make him understand that you're not wearing panties underneath. Now you're in for a treat...

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

[spitdrunken]

relationships: robin x reader, sunday & robin, sunday & reader

notes: ambiguous relationships, implied mind control (not with robin/reader)

Robin is pretty particular about the people she wants to date, and has a certain modus operandi. Due to her cross-galaxy fame, it’s pretty much impossible for her to go on dating apps, at least via the usual channels. But she doesn’t want to limit her dating pool to just fellow celebrities, either. Masterful at disguises as she is, during first contact and first dates she has a tendency to hide her real identity, though she would never wait long before revealing herself. Even prior to how famous she is now, she has been burnt in the past by people being interested in who they think she is, rather than who she actually is as a person.

She has a special fondness for romance novels, and spends quite a bit of time discussing them on online forums. Online is one of the places she does not have to worry about how she presents herself, and she can gush in anonymity like anyone else. Thinking of a meet-cute is one of the few unrealistic dreams Robin allows herself, but perhaps she meets you through prolonged chatting online. Starting from your shared interests and underneath fake aliases, before spreading out to subject such as your actual lives and the people around you. Your friend is rather secretive, not giving out her exact name or showing pictures, but you assume it’s just in the name of privacy, until…

You: no waaaaaayyyyy You: where’s the /j?? birdie i swear lmao You: you’re kidding right You: or are you actually being serious?? wait wait ok You: ok if you’re serious. ily girl and no offense but like. send me a picture of you and a note with my username on it or smth? cuz im sure you can imagine it’s kinda hard to believe you’re THAT Robin

And she does! She sends you multiple pictures in fact, in multiple poses, to reassure you that the images aren’t A.I.-generated. When she apologises to you for hiding who she really is, she does it through a voice message, and you can hear one of the most envied voices in the galaxy speak just to you. It’s… Kind of overwhelming? But at the same time, it doesn’t change all that much.

She’s still your friend, who you’ve talked about to your struggles and gushed about your interests to, who always listens and always has a nice word to say. Who, if she has any faults, is always too hard to herself, never seeming to cut herself a break. Who always seems to be asleep at different times, and can disappear for days at a time. You thought she just had a horrifically wrecked sleep schedule, but this would explain that! Maybe it helps that, though you’re definitely familiar with Robin, you wouldn’t call yourself a fan or stan of hers.

When she confesses her feelings for you, it’s over the phone, a rare trembling enter his voice as she carefully considers her words.

“I’ve thought… A lot of times about how to put this. I still don’t really know how,” she says, laughing lightly. “I don’t want to lose what we have now. In my life, you’re one of the few people I can always turn to— Who I can show… Other sides of myself. I’ll just say it. It’s not really as romantic as the books we’ve read, but, I’ve fallen for you. Would you care to meet, sometime? And go on a date? I don’t want to pressure you, or feel like you have to do this. If you’re not interested, I still really, really would like to be your friend.”

There are a lot of conversations to be had when you begin to date Robin. It’s not going to be exactly easy. Not only do you need to be prepared to be put on blast on social media and feature in gossip articles, you’ll have to deal with the fact that she’ll be away on travel most of the time. Including to dangerous places, such as active warfronts.

This is something that, regardless of their love for you or anyone else, is integral to Robin’s life, and one thing she’ll never change. If that is something you cannot come to terms with and this reveals itself during your conversations, you’d be better off remaining friends. You can accompany Robin on certain travels, maybe even all of them, depending on the kind of person you are, but for a long while at least, Robin won’t settle anywhere permanently.

But if you manage to get through all of this, Robin is a wonderful girlfriend. She writes you letters and sends you gifts no matter where she goes, and makes time to call you at least once a day whenever she can. In interviews, she’ll bring you up as one of the people who give her strength, and her face lights up when she speaks of you. At events, she’d enjoy helping you dress up in whatever style you want, and constantly keeping your arms interlinked as you walk around.

While she isn’t all that touchy in public, she’d be clingy whenever it’s just the two of you. Making up for lost time together. Another thing she would enjoy is putting the both of you in increasingly elaborate disguises for public outings together! She has to make the fact she’s nearly always followed around by paparazzi fun somehow.

One of the largest ‘hurdles’ when dating Robin is, funnily enough, meeting her older brother Sunday. She speaks of him with nothing but affection and the occasional tinge of worry (though, when you tell her that she has the exact same kind of habits towards overworking herself, it’s suddenly not so bad after all).

Robin herself seems to have no fears that you won’t meet her brother’s standards, but you have your doubts, really. If your glances over the letters he’s written her are anything to go by, he loves Robin just as much as she loves him, if not even more so. While his approval is important to her, you’re certain that she would never break up with you over it, or anything of the sort. Still… You can’t help but feeling nervous.

Your worries aren’t unfounded. Over a dinner in Penacony’s Dreamscape, Sunday seems to scrutinise you, gaze boring into your forehead. All the time, there is nothing but a gentle smile on his face. Yet, you’ve never felt to be under such a strong spotlight, not even at events accompanied by Robin, walking across massive stages. Your head hurts, but you’re guessing it’s just from the general stress that you’re feeling.

As Robin laughs about the type of meal manifested on her brother’s plate (“An Alfalfa Salad for yourself? I really thought you would’ve gone for something sweeter, brother!”), you shift on your seat in discomfort and attempt to keep small talk conversations going.

Perhaps it’s your mind being tricks on you, perhaps you are ‘spiraling in on yourself’, as Robin sometimes calls it, but you really do believe that this man does not like you whatsoever. When you can’t take it anymore, you move your chair. Its loud scraping breaks up any conversation.

The smile on your face is wobbly. “I’m just going to go to the bathroom for a second. Excuse me.”

Robin puts her hand on your arm. “I can show you where it is? The mansion’s layout can be a bit confusing at times, even though I’ve been here plenty of times myself.”

Sunday, across the table, shakes his head and gets up. “Please stay seated, sister. As the host, it is my duty to guide your… Partner, to wherever they may need to go. Allow me to guide you.”

Somehow, your attempted escape has become a new trap in and of itself. It’s practically impossible to deny to go with him now, though, so you straighten your shoulders, nod, and follow Sunday further into his home. The clacking of his shoes on the marble floor is the only noise keeping you two company as you walk a step behind him. He stops. There is no bathroom, here. Only a giant paint of Robin situated on the wall. She’s smiling. Sunday turns half a circle around and stares at it, hands folded together behind his back.

“You…” he speaks slowly. “Do you think you can make her happy?”

Your head throbs. Your head hangs a little to the side, as you stare at the painting. “I think… When I met Robin, she was already happy. In a sense. She has a purpose. A goal she’ll always keep striving for— No matter what. Chasing that, I think it makes her feel more fulfilled than many people… Like me.”

You slowly shake your head. “So, no, I don’t think just myself could make her happy. But as things are now, she is. I do add something to her life, but… I don’t think the rest could be taken away.”

You stare at Sunday. If there is a thought that hits you now, in the painfully placid nature of his expression, in the manner he has watched you all evening, it is not merely protectiveness that fuels him. In part, it is jealousy, too.

You sway a little on your feet.

“You act as if Robin does not care for you,” you smile wistfully, turning to the painting in turn. “You don’t know how she talks about you, if you aren’t around. I think about it, sometimes. If you and I… Were hanging off of a precipice, and she could only save one of us— I can’t say for certain who she would pick. But if I’m honest with myself, as much as it would pain her, and how much it hurts me to think, I really do believe she would save you.”

You squeeze your eyes shut as the corners of your vision turn blurry. “I— I don’t know why I’m saying any of this.” You press your hand to the side of your head, and drag it down your cheek. “I’m sorry. I don’t think I’m feeling very well.”

“Is that really the truth?” Sunday asks.

“To me it is, I guess.” You mumble. “If you asked Robin, she would answer… That she would find a way to save both of us. No matter the cost. Because that is the kind of person she is. But I can’t seem to think that would be a reality.”

Sunday hums, then turns around you. When he nods, your nausea dissipates, you straighten your back, and whatever stupor you had found yourself in leaves your mind. All at once, shame crashes into you. What the hell have you been babbling on and on about for the past five minutes? When he looks at you now, his gaze is not quite as oppressive as before, though you are not entirely sure how to feel about him.

He lowers his head a tad, ears fluttering. “Thank you for allowing me to understand you better,” Sunday tells you. “You are a different type of person than I imagined you to be— Perhaps you and I are more similar than I believed. Due to my personal feelings, it seems I led my thoughts stray into disharmony. Will you forgive me?” Though the ice has left his tone, it is now as if he has shaved off every edge, covering it all in fabric. It is almost condescending.

But you, honestly, still kind of need to piss. And you’re over all of this, really. “I— Yeah. Yeah, sure. Spirit of harmony, and all that.”

Sunday smiles. “Well, then I believe a reintroduction is in order.” He extends his hand towards you, and you hesitate only a moment before taking it. “I suppose we are family now, too. Know that, whenever life’s troubles seem to be consuming you, Penacony will always opens its arms to you.”

[bylrlve]

Warning! Potential Spoilers for Stranger Things 5!

A compilation of recent tweets made by Alex and others about the mileven ‘making out in a field’ leak. Alex is insisting that this scene is separate from the sequence involving them talking on the rooftop, the scene which was leaked as a video back in January. According to 011scenes this scene happens ‘at the beginning’ aka in episode one.

The issue? Alex’s sources are people who speak to paps (which she lied about in answering a cc question; either that or she’s clueless), and who deliberately feed her inconsequential things production dgaf abiut because it distracts from the juicy shit e.g., what Mike and Will are doing. She was told ‘Robin and Will have a scene’ and that morphed into ‘Will is in his unrequited mopey Steve era, Jonathan and Robin don’t share scenes’, etc. The source said nothing about Byler being finished or about passionate makeouts.

I’m suspicious of the second anon’s claim about Finn, as Noah is straight-up went on TikTok live right before filming commenced in January to read out byler endgame and Byler kiss comments lmao. The bit about the love triangle being kept under wraps seems accurate enough - they’re openly passing out scraps of mileven to leakers to pass onto Alex, and it’s pretty clear they didn’t care about that mileven video hitting national news website in the Uk (daily mail). Byler? On lockdown. The only thing we know is the hospital stuff and that’s due to specific leakers, and even then it’s not that much. It is clearly a big question going into s5 for the GA, so it being kept tightly guarded is unsurprising.

The context of the kiss will be interesting, regardless of if it’s pro-mileven or somehow anti-. Alex indicates that it’s only them present in the field - BUT she’s also said that she outright leaves Will out of ‘leaks’ and gave the example of Max, Lucas, and Will having a scene but her only reporting Lumax having a scene, so… S4 mileven was a concerted effort to show that the characters had matured from s3, and that their fight was more serious. They only kissed once, and that briefly, and were… unaffectionate at the end of the season, to say the very least. The reversion to kissing in broad daylight, in an apocalyptic setting when El will be mostly hiding with Hopper from the military, feels a little out of character - and will certainly be jarring tonally and thematically.

Alex received this dm ^ back in February (discussed in my first leak post), which stated that hopper is annoyed by mike’s continuing presence around el. I and many others (including Alex iirc) dismissed it, as Hopper and Mike are on good terms at the end of s4. If Mike and El are still doing reckless things in s4, and if the old pattern of isolating El from others just to kiss re-emerges, though… The veracity of this is very shaky: the time skip occurs gradually over episode one, not in between episodes 1 and 2.

It’s important to note that many leaks are undoubtedly missing context. Just today, Alex brought up how she was right about Mike ignoring Will at the airport, about their fight, and about the airport kiss. Yes, she was, but she lacked the tonal subtext of the scene itself, which portrayed Mike’s behaviour as inexplicably phony - and of course, she lacked the lynchpin of this plot, which is that Will is in romantic love with Mike. She completely missed that, and it meant she missed every important aspect of this plotline.

Byrhop, a highly reliable st acc who’s closely following filming, was able to ascertain that Vickie is at the farm.

Lastly, I want to go over everything I know to try and map a trajectory. The Byers are living in the radio station before it’s overrun by military and they flee to the Turnbow farm - I personally am not sure of when exactly this occurs. There is a leaked hospital file showing that Karen Wheeler is attacked by a demogorgan. The file is dated as 1/1987 but it could be a prop error, as I’ve seen claims that she’s attacked when Holly is taken..

As we know, according to the leaked episode 2 title, Holly Wheeler goes missing. This likely occurs at the end of episode one, but the chronology is unclear. Karen being attacked could happen here, and I’ve seen claims that it happens in episode 2. Mike and El kiss in episode one, and as I’ve said this has been overblown greatly by Alex. The chronology of this is also unclear. At some point in episode one, Mike and Dustin are at the high school and interact with the jocks. Mike is wearing the same outfit he wears on the rooftop - dark trousers, blue and black shirt with a yellow collar, etc. As this is what he wore in the official pic released by Ross of him in his room, I am speculating that this is the first outfit he wears in the story proper, after the last time jump to November 1987, and that he may wear it throughout episode 2 as well

In episode 2, Mike, Nancy, and Karen have a plotline at the hospital. From official BTS pics, we know Robin and Vickie are there as well. The above anon does not mention Mike being injured, and its description of Karen’s mindset does not tally either with her having being attacked by a demogorgan prior or with Holly being abducted. It’s likely that they have partially but not totally accurate information; or else it’s a point in favour of Holly being taken and Karen being attacked after this happens, at the end of episode 2. I have confirmation that Mike is injured in episode 2, as are several other people - I discussed this in a post a few days ago - please discount the forehead kiss anon section of that post. This was confirmed by an extra who played a nurse on the scheme and by a different source later. The second source confirms that Will shows up last, and is crying and blaming himself for what happened. - I also have confirmation that El doesn’t show up to the hospital at all. The nurse extra also confirmed that Mike and Will ‘share scenes’ although he was not present for those so can’t speak as to what happened in them - I don’t have an image of that text so didn’t include it yesterday.

The forehead kiss anon is definitely not real (check @will80sbyers) but the rest seems to be.

Lastly, Atlanta-filming insinuates that the m*leven rooftop scene occurs after the hospital subplot. It’s unknown how they came to this conclusion.

To summarise: m*leven kiss in episode one, potentially during one of the staggered time jumps (my speculation) and the short rooftop conversation between them likely in either episode one or two immediately before something involving Hopper and Joyce occurs down in the field that alarms El. I’ve seen conflicting into on when Holly is abducted - either episode one or episode two. In episode 2 Mike, Karen, and Nancy go to the hospital for plot reasons. If this occurs after Holly goes missing, it is likely to be related to that. I am speculating that Holly vanishing, whenever it happens, accelerates the byler plotline, as Mike will more-than-likely seek out Will for advice, reassurance, information. In episode 2, Mike gets injured somehow at the hospital, along with several other people in a small-scale mass-casualty event, and ends up being admitted to the hospital. As I’ve said, it seems to be rock-solid that Will arrives and is crying and blaming himself for what happened, and Will stays with him but El is nowhere to be found in this plotline. We know from BTS pics that Robin and vickie are also there, and I’ve seen claims that Jonathan shows up to be with Nancy, but have no proof or knowledge of the providence of such claims, so… take that for what it is. It is pretty certain, as far as I know, that El is not there.

One possibility is that Will is possessed at least temporarily in 501-2. Perhaps there’s another superspy, ‘it’s a trap’ situation? Will Byers would never be reckless with the safety of Mike Wheeler or his family… but I bet Vecna and the mindflayer are just itching to attack the one salvation standing between them and Will. Something to muse on.

The timing of the rooftop scene is very important. El not showing up at the hospital is unlikely to happen after it. The scene is very clearly about affirming their relationship- whether as lovers or as friends. It’s likely that she’s distracted by Max, who is her main plot, but this is a narrative. El not being present for Mike, while Will is there and crying and staying by his side? That is telling of a potential rift that opens up in their relationship between episode one and two. There is a pattern of problems arising in their relationship in episode twos. In s2 El reached out to Mike during his call but he walked away while an ominous stinger played. In s3 they broke up at the end of episode 2. In s4 they had their disastrous roller rink date.

A few days ago, I gif’d the rooftop scene, and speculated that they’re discussing being friends, and that El apologises for not being there and Mike says ‘No. You should have been.’ before basically saying that he’s okay because Will was and “you’re all friends to me.” The ending of s4, to me, potentially marks a shift in Mike’s attitude to El, as much as it does for hers to him. In the hospital she seeks him out by resting a head on his shoulder, and she did speak briefly with him prior about Brenner, but he offers her no comfort beyond a stiff arm around her. When they arrive at the cabin, he walks in with the other boys instead of staying with her - as shes’s clearly very nervous and emotional about reentering the cabin. Finally, as we have all observed, she directs an almost angry look at Will and Mike before stomping into her room and slamming the door - a parallel to s3 after the phone call with Mike where she knew he was lying. When it pans back to Mike, and Will asks if they’ve talked? He rolls his eyes. Unlike in 403, he does not seek her out and push through her self-isolation. He leaves her be. This, coming from Mike the Paladin, suggests that he’s kind of done with trying.

El’s attitude has been convincingly dismissed by M*levens as simple grief over Max causing her to retreat as she always does. It is bizarre, however, that the monologue did nothing at all to make her feel she could rely on Mike, and much more so that he’s very apathetic.

I posit that they might, maybe, fall into old habits of passivity and inertia and string the relationship along over the time jump. Perhaps the kiss is from one of the interim jumps between March 1986 and November 1987? I could see El having too much on her plate to really address it, and feeling that she doesn’t want to push him away - after all, he did give the big damn speech. The kiss could be a parallel to Boyce and Stancy. If that Hopper leak is accurate (doubtful), perhaps they fall back into habits of clinginess and immaturity while still being deeply unhappy. Nurse extra stated that Mike is no longer trying to be normal, and that he’s discovering himself, being himself again, and being the support he once was - the wording rather implies that it means being the support to Will.

Of course, I could be wrong, and it could be that they’re doing very well, and that the kiss is indeed as happy and loving as Alex paints it out to be… but I am skeptical bc of the hospital, and because of El the brave protector not rushing to her boyfriend’s side. It’s simply too early to say. If my musing on whether Will was possessed and effectively set Mike up (against his will ofc) is correct, and if my lip-reading is correct, Mike speaking affectionately of Will here could be due to the fact that he’s intimately witnessed Will being possessed, and he knows Will would never do something like that on purpose.

Finally, definitely worth noting that there have been no signs of any NPC love interests. Will’s storylines are being protected well from leakers, so people could be missing something, but there has been no indication of it. What we are getting, though, is a focus on Will’s love of Mike, and his selfless devotion.

All of this is incredibly shaky, and I’m interested to hear your guys’ opinions on alternate sequences of events. Whatever the truth, clearly m*leven is inconsequential to the production, as it’s being deliberately leaked to distract from the real juicy stuff.

Oh, and I just want to wrap up by mentioning this bit of idiocy. Someone in Alex’s inbox sincerely thought that the production actually kills fields they want to look dead-looking, rather than editing it. And Alex agreed.

[justanotherhh]

alastor aroace semiotics: symbols/metaphors/codes (oh my!)

thinking about some of the aroace subtext, both in terms of what's definitely intentional, and things that one can pick up on within the burgeoning field of "what the heck does aspec (in this case aroace) semiology even look like in (this particular) narrative?"

there's the really obvious one of course "ace in the hole." funny as well, because ace in the hole could also reference Alastor being the card you play as a hidden advantage (potentially hinting that Rosie knows that Alastor has his own agenda and supports that, like she does in the song). Of course "Alastor is ace" is the main point of the joke, because it's a sentence that comes a little out of nowhere, and clearly confuses Alastor, because he doesn't know Stuff

2. secondly, there's the pilot episode's placing Alastor first next to and then on top of the Ace of Spades. tbh if this was an accident, it sure was a serendipitous one, because the Ace of Spades not only refers to being ace, but specifically aroace (with Hearts meaning alloace, Diamonds meaning demiace, and Clubs meaning grey-ace <- t Ace of Diamonds/Clubs are a more open to interpretation, I've seen some also use them for demiromantic and greyromantic)

3. Body language! Alastor's reactions to being propositioned or involved in a sex joke, or having to listen to romance talk ranges from discomfort (glitching), to blunt refusal/shutting down of the conversation, to boredom/distraction. I haven't made a study of Alastor's body language in detail, but I'd be interested in how his smiles potentially shift when around very sexual and/or romantic discussion, regardless of whether he's the centre of that (but probably moreso if he is). I think this would come more to the fore in future seasons if there were examples beyond Angel Dust, who also made Husk uncomfortable in the first half of s1, but Alastor -- especially in the pilot -- had very visceral reactions to Angel's "flirting/joking," moreso than anyone else, until Angel had really gone too far with Husk in ep4 (and he come onto Alastor as strongly/invasively as he did with Husk)

4. Speaking of Angel... Alastor not being present outside of a flashback in all of episode 4, and not in episode 6 either. Both episodes featured sex heavily, including Angel showing off one of his pornos, and the gang going to a sex club. Also, Valentino was in both of them (makes sense, seeing as they were Angel-centric). I wonder what Alastor feels about Valentino's whole... existence. He's also the only main s1 hotel character to not be involved in the trust exercises that lead them to the bondage/SM club. this has nothing necessarily to do with the character, but he's very much placed outside of sexual scenarios and places by the writing/plot, which is fun to notice, especially in the first two examples, as his not being in the episodes isn't actually explained. No Alastor in the sex episodes, because his fourth wall sex repulsed senses were tingling?

5. boundaries and power fantasies. that is, Alastor is a character who has very clear boundaries and ways of enforcing them. from blowing up Sir Pentious when he grabs his coat, to noping out of any space he wants to, to seizing the narrative from Vox and telling the story on his terms, to shadow tentacles (ironic), nobody touches him emotionally/physically unless they're allowed. Niffty, Rosie, and Mimzy so far appear to be the ones who have crossed into that "allowed" space the most, but considering he lets everyone (barring Lucifer and Husk, who don't want to) hug him in the finale, some of those barriers are coming down, which is another interesting analysis to make at some point

these boundaries aren't all entirely healthy either -- the way he lashes out at Husk who seems to actually be trying to look out for him (which suggests that Husk is emotionally close-ish to him, enough that he didn't realise he was overstepping), and the way he breaks down in the finale, shows that his inability to be vulnerable in front of others is... not actually a good thing. I wrote a whole bunch about how this part of Alastor's writing play into a very aroace-in-feel narrative for him, but suffice to say... a story about someone with boundaries that seems to be completely absent of "romance/sex will fix you" is refreshing. and very aroace coded

there's also a power fantasy in the idea that one can simply bend the space to avoid ones boundaries being trampled over. to be able to either nope out of a room or to make oneself so terrifying that nobody would want to try to get up in your space... it's got a little smthinsmthin of a "wish it were me" in there. being repulsed means an often constant erosion and invasion of boundaries, from people making your disgust and/or obliviousness the centre of their sex jokes, to being hyper-scrutinised and challenged every time you do or don't let someone into your space in whatever way, or challenge their notions of what's "allowed" as an aroace person. sometimes you just want to say "Demonic Powers Be Upon Ye" and be done with it

6. An Absence. most often aspec narrative is defined by an absence of allo-narrative. that is, Angel Dust, Husk, Charlie, Vaggie, Cherri, Sir Pentious, Lucifer, are set up as allo-figures with romance and sex featuring more or less in all of their stories. the only hotel residents so far who don't have that going on are Alastor and Niffty, and Niffty's story has yet to have the foundations laid out for beyond the very bare bones, and she flirts with others (her "bad boy" preference). whatever Alastor's journey is, it's not coded as alloromantic or allosexual in any way, whether through casual jokes/flirting, or a longform romantic and sexual relationship exploration, with the possible exception of...

7. Vox. the characters that Alastor seems closest to in this story are Rosie, Mimzy, Niffty, Charlie, and Husk (with the mysterious figure that owns his soul looming in the back as well). out of them, none of them are coded as anyone he's sexually or romantically involve with or heading in that direction. the last figure in Alastor's life that's very heavily figured so far is Vox. And Vox is obsessed with Alastor in a way that absolutely can be read as a bad one-sided break-up/jilted stalker type framing, with Alastor gleefully recounting his "no" when talking about their past, and otherwise putting Vox out of his mind, while almost all of Vox' big character moments revolve around how much real estate Alastor takes up in his mind (literally, considering his error message is all Alastor messaging)

Vox being a figure who is symbolically the trampler of aroace boundaries is a very good way of showing Alastor's total disinterest and even disgust (depending on whether or not he knows that Vox was/is into him), and can act as a future potential interesting barometer for other characters to be "less" invasive, but still not quite getting it to begin with (see, Angel Dust's casual flirting, Charlie's tendency to see everything from her perspective, who knows how Cherri and Lucifer might fit into this equation, and generally the sex-and-romance framing of a lot of the other narratives)

8. I talked about aroaceness being a humanising factor to Alastor in my other big ol' post I did, just want to mention it here as well. so far it exists somewhat as a Potential, in the sense that we're firmly in s1 and there's still a lot of ways this could all go, but I think it's worth mentioning as a form of foundational signposting work that's been done for his character

he's more on the dark grey end of the grey scale of all of these characters, he's manipulative, sadistic, cruel when he wants to be, petty, selfish, likes being the centre of attention + is easily rankled when he's not, and presumably he went to hell because he killed people for kicks <- these traits are not unique to him, considering the setting, but what is is the beginnings of a storyline exploring his particular relationship to vulnerability and power and why those things are a part of him in the way they are. this from the perspective of someone who is aroace (and possibly repulsed) instantly adds a potential sympathetic nuance to who he's become, similar to the layer of power fantasy mentioned above. both of these turn his narrative from a cautionary tale or a villain-played-straight (haha) trope into something much more interesting

with the semiotics of aroaceness already in place, these affect how we read the foundations for the rest of his narrative and where it's going. quite simply, it's one of the biggest factors right now that make all his other story beats more resonant and interesting, depending of course on where they take it...

9. his smile. since we've gotten deep enough into meta territory now that we're in hc/future theorising country -- the smile is of course a mask, that's known to everyone. there's a lot of future opportunities for how to utilise that alongside aroaceness-as-theme-for-him. aroaceness, or just "someone where there is a noticeable lack of romantic (and hinted at sexual) interest," is usually coded through a certain shallowness. a pathologisation of behaviours -- which is another deeper analysis post to make at some point (jeez there's so many). Alastor is off-putting, yes, but he's also very confident and charming when he wants to be, he can put people at ease despite themselves (see, Charlie). It's a very interesting mask to give someone who's aroace, because it makes him complicated, rather than a simple ableist "point at the weirdo with no friends, that's our Outsider/killer."

(it also hearkens back to the humanising factor, in that his shallowness isn't because he's aroace, it's because he doesn't know how to be vulnerable with people as the person he is in a world that is incredibly amatonormative and focused on sex)

His smile can be unnerving, but it can also be disarming, give others the illusion that he's in control, make it impossible to guess his emotions (etc. basically what he said to Charlie)

so quite simply, his smile as a twisted distortion of society's demands upon people. he's not being abrupt, aloof, asocial, unkempt, or all the things aroaceness is often stereotyped as. he's performing the most acceptable normative person you can imagine. his surface is unscratcheable because of normative ideals

it's a very fun, unique-to-this-story way of potentially telling an aroace narrative. I'd be interested in what it takes to make him drop it (if he can, or if the story takes the route of accepting that he can't -- the man who laughs kinda vibes) and whether that will tie into a piece of his story that itself takes on aroace proportions (perhaps related to worrying for others in a non-romantic way, perhaps in relation to being able to or being forced to be vulnerable in a non-romantic/non-sexual way, etcetc).

Potentials:

we haven't seen him around the aro/ace aroace colours yet as far as I can remember, which is a fun, easy way to signpost (see, Vox flashing the bisexual flag on his screen)

since we've had an "ace in the hole" joke, I think we could have an aro/arrow-based pun in there as well, maybe even as a deconstruction of when they're used in romantic ways -- (no aro going through his heart, too aro for cupid's arrow, idk I'm spitballing here) or as literal arrows in some way. also someone's gotta call him aces at one point, right? just cos? I feel like the "<2" emoji might be too niche (heck, maybe all of this is, but that's part of the point -- all of this should be ways we're able to signpost aro and ace and aroace characters), but there's characters who know modern emoji and online lingo

other asexual symbols I know of include stating a preference for cake or pizza over sex and/or dating and the black and white rings (worn respectively on right an left middle fingers, although since they only have four fingers in this world...)

I've really enjoyed "clueless cannibal about modern lingo" Alastor comics, including the one about serving cunt and the one about eating ass both by @nouverx. it goes nicely on from his being confused about "ace in the hole," with that HH style sexual comedy. there's a whole bunch of that one could play with

speaking of slang, confirmed bachelor has often meant gay, but the aro/ace community and the gay community has overlapped as long as anyone has been non-conforming. @creepysora suggested a gentleman never kisses and tells, either as Alastor being unaware that it's actually about sex, or as an aware deconstruction of the phrase that gives him the space (similar to confirmed bachelor) to sneakily go, "go mind your own fucking business 😊!" I'm sure there are others that could fulfill a similar purpose of allowing Alastor a certain kind of old-timey buffer

similar to the episode of Bojack Horseman that had Todd visit his girlfriend's parents (both Todd and his GF are asexual and not out to her parents), which depicted allosexuality from the perspective of asexuality as something nonsensical and Other, perhaps having something from Alastor's POV in which he's the observer of the rites of romance and/or sex in a way that shows their strangeness when one sits outside of their tenets

would kind of like to see him killing/hurting people for being pushy, either when alive or dead. I already see a lot of potentials for his past as a serial killer to be framed from an aroace POV, but I especially like this idea, similar to how Hannibal often targets people for being "rude."

more on what I was saying about aroaceness as a humanising trait -- more on how this affected him in life, how he feels about Vox's consistent obsessive behaviour, how it potentially makes it harder to imagine his place in a group setting like the hotel (which is rapidly being paired off into romantic couples -- often a nightmare scenario for aromantics), more on how potentially learning these words or something better to describe himself can make it possible for him to assert boundaries without shutting everyone out to a large extent, and also, tbh, to put Big Expectations onto a story that's barely even started, I hope that none of this takes away his less savoury traits necessarily. I hope he's still kind of an asshole, but simply that he is grounded in himself enough to be able to really believe in Charlie's work/aims and support her in them for more reasons than his own ends, and can admit to really caring for something

reiterating: I am interested in how his smile-as-mask will play into all of this

Any symbolism, metaphor, coding, and straight-up telling I've missed in the show itself? Any you'd want to see in upcoming seasons?

[lilyofporcelain]

DWC - 13 Feb - Day 5 - Undersea / Navigate

With a distinct fondness, dark painted nails gently brushed over the spire and whorl of the conch shell. It had been a gift Saith had presented to her after their very first date. The ironic thing was that they hadn’t gone to a beach. Sure, Boralus was right on the water and he had taken her all over the seaside settlement, but that was purely because he’d gotten lost. Then she’d found out a month later he’d worried that their little detour to the cafe he’d meant to take her to would somehow colour her perception of him. Maybe he’d sent her the shell as a means to make up for it. Maybe he’d simply wanted her to have a token, a material memory of something that had the potential to be greatly important. In other words, the starting to a story that was collaboratively written by them.

Or maybe he’d simply remembered that Belidrae was fond of water in all of its forms. As she traced the tendrils of brown and taupe that crossed into an off-white, she smiled. It didn’t really matter why he’d given it to her. Only that he had. Every time she looked at it, thought about it, she considered that Saith had… Well. She had sought to protect his heart. To protect him. A courtesan couldn’t fall in love. And she certainly couldn’t let others fall in love with her, either. Others had tried to capture her affections and thinking the heart too precious a thing to cause jealousy to, Belidrae had refused every single person who’d come before.

As she lifted the conch shell to her right ear and listened to the idle ebb and flow of a proverbial tide crashing onto a beach, only to repeat the cycle, she found herself sighing. Saith had been entirely different. A man with a similar past, the moment she told him what she did, how she earned her coin and made her living, he’d understood. And he’d been able to accept that part, still wanting to claim her heart. It had been Belidrae who realised, shortly after, that she couldn’t carry on. Not with others the way she did with him. She had fallen, and she had fallen hard. It was treacherous and tumultuous then, the abyss of her emotions that she’d not been prepared for. Coming to terms that saying goodbye to Saith was heartbreaking. She suspected he would never know how truly affected she had been, on a morning she left him a letter, unable to face him, thanking him for such a wonderful set of deeply romantic weeks, thinking she would never see him again.

Shaking her head, she smiled, lowering the conch shell to settle right atop her heart. Yet it wasn’t to be. Saith had refused to let her give him such a farewell. Not without clarification. As if it was entirely possible he would have regretted letting her walk out of his life without at least trying to get her to remain a staple. He’d been blind and unaware of all of the inner-workings of the woman he’d likened to a night sky and quickly decided he was drawn to. And here they were, trying to find a way forward in the world together, both of them braving their own set of circumstances.

Belidrae thought about the ring she’d given him, a family heirloom that she had acquired from her parents through the courier once she had written and admitted that, likely much to their chagrin, she’d found the man she wanted to marry. More so, the man who wanted to marry her. Wouldn’t be the same as the blood knight that Tynnan served with, though she thought of him with a great, distinct fondness. He’d not been a grand love, but maybe a first love for her, though he was betrothed to marry and Belidrae had merely been his friend with the utmost of benefits. In another lifetime, in another set of possibilities set by the Bronze Dragonflight, maybe that had been more of a possibility. Maybe she’d met him intentionally, however, that he might have played an important role in her life regardless, paving the way towards an eventual alchemist and informant.

If her parents offered her the ring, that meant they approved, right? She didn’t know for sure, though she was going to do whatever she wanted, never mind if they gave approval or not. Considering they’d not spoken to her since she’d become infested with the Void, it wasn’t as though she had much to go on. Despite getting caught up in all of that unwillingly, or unknowingly as was more properly the case, she could only remember crying to her parents and being met with an outstanding refusal. She wasn’t to return home. She wasn’t to be associated with them any further. It had been a challenge to pick herself up from that. She’d been homeless and hungry, desperate, and with no friends in a predominantly human city of cold brick masonry. So she’d sold the only thing she had to sell—herself.

Now, she was comfortable. She had made the executive decision to stop servicing clients and instead, focused entirely on the modest travelling tailor shop she manned, which had previously been for the sake of public appearances. And if Saith had anything to say about it, she would want for nothing, though she’d tried to ward him away from such things. Instead, he provided her a coffer from his family’s finances, informing her that the funds were to be used for whoever his future partner was. And any children that might have resulted from just such a coupling. She had immediately decided that the same coffers would be exclusively reserved for the latter, whenever they would come about.

Had the anger of her parents in the face of her long-lived irresponsibility waned? Were they simply standing on ceremony, waiting to reserve their judgement for when they would inevitably host a family gathering in Quel’thalas?

Feeling the telltale brush of soft warm fur against her legs, she found Toasty who had very proudly dug up a mandrake, or what at least looked like part of a mandrake plant from Saith’s garden outside in the very front of their apothecary and home. “Ohhhh, you’re a bad cat,” Belidrae began, and though the words were slightly scolding, they were easily overpowered by an incredulous laughter. “Bad cat, bad cat, Toasty.” It grew into a lyrical amusement, but she recognised that essentially, the kitten had brought her a gift. Saith probably wouldn’t view it with the same light humour since it was something he was using for his work, but…

Turning the remnants of the plant this way and that, Belidrae grimaced. “...Maybe he won’t notice?” No. He was definitely going to notice. “...What if… What if I just plant it again?” She looked down to Toasty with a lopsided smile. “Let’s just do that. If we never saw it, then we don’t know how this happened, hm?” Setting down the conch shell that contained a marker for a special part of her life, she began to head outside. At the door she gently pushed open, she turned to cast it one more fond glance before Toasty’s rather innocent ‘merp’ grabbed her attention.

Looking down to the kitten, Belidrae shook her head in a gentle disbelief. “You and I sure are starting to collect a lot of secrets. It’s a good thing your dad doesn’t speak ‘merp.’”

@daily-writing-challenge

[oletus-writer]

Andrew NSFW Alphabet

Warnings: nsfw

(Some parts are from this post)

A = Aftercare (what they're like after sex)

His first instinct is to hide himself, to not face how embarrassing the situation is, regardless of whether or not he wants to be there and pamper you. Andrew doesn’t have experience at all, and doesn’t know that you’d need to stay behind and make sure the partner is alright.

B = Body part (their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner's)

He doesn’t have a favourite part of his body, but if ask him his least favourite part, the list never ends. Maybe his hands aren’t that bad - sure, they’re scarred, but the warmth he feels when your hands intertwine is the sweetest honey. Of course, he loves every part of you; you’re the saint that his pilgrim hands can’t touch. He’s especially fond of your face, as it is seared into his memory, lest he forget it when you inevitably die. He definitely would have a locket with your face in it, if you permit it.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

While he’s a virgin, he also doesn’t cum immediately. His skin is rough from the years of work, and while he is somewhat sensitive, the knowledge that it is you, the person he loves, he’s having sex with is the thing that tips him over the edge. His cum is light and stringy, and a moderate amount comes out.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

While semi-public sex isn’t his thing, there are some times where he finds himself rather distracted in matches, regardless of what you’re wearing. He also wouldn’t mind sex in The Red Church, if it’s only the two of you, pressing you against the altar and worshiping you like you were the only god present.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they're doing?)

He has no idea what the fuck he’s doing.

F = Favourite position (this goes without saying)

Andrew enjoys vanilla, missionary sex, although it’s slightly off putting that you can see his face throughout the whole ordeal. No doubt he looks hideous while he’s cumming. Doggystyle fixes that problem, although that would mean he cant see your face, either.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s a stammering, shaking mess, and therefore won’t have enough energy to think of jokes. Perhaps tell a few to soothe his nerves, although he might misinterpret it and think you don’t want to have sex with him. He would appreciate it more if you sat him down and told him stories of your embarrassments in sex, and encouraged him to do his best.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes?)

There wasn’t anyone who told him he had to be neatly groomed, and if you are, he’d suddenly feel very self-conscious. He doesn’t mind if you are; he doesn’t see much of a point in shaving.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? are they romantic?)

Sex, to him is an intimate thing, saved for his lover alone. While he might not prepare candles (might set the manor on fire) and wine and dine you (can’t cook a good steak) beforehand, the act is intimate in his heart. He thinks it’s one of the things that ties the souls together.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcannon)

He was raised as a Christian, so he was taught not to touch himself, as it was a sin. However, he began masturbating after he met you, when he couldn’t keep his lust under prayer and reflection.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

He’s pretty vanilla - degrade him, and you’ll hurt him, let him tie you up and he feels uncomfortable, etc. While he’s willing to try things to an extent, you’ll have to be patient when introducing him to your kinks.

L = Location (favourite places to have sex)

There’s always the lingering paranoia that someone would stumble upon the two of you in his room, even if he’s locked the door. The beds in White Sand Street Asylum are a bit of a safer bet, but it’s dirty, and who knows if that map would suddenly be in commission. Besides, an abandoned building isn’t the most romantic place to have sex in… For now, he sticks to the bedroom.

M = Motivation (what turns them on?)

He’ll be turned on even if you’re wearing the most prude clothing. The way the fabric falls from your figure, how you move, etc. His mind would overthink everything, and a kiss on the cheek where your hand lingers makes him realise how busy he was with matches, and how he should make up for it.

N = No (what turns them off?)

He doesn’t like degrading, as it makes his insecurities worse, and he’s less likely to try to have sex with you soon after. He also doesn’t like degrading you either, as he doesn’t want to put you down for whatever reason.

O = Oral (do they prefer giving or receiving? how skilled are they?)

Both giving and receiving oral gives him anxiety - he’s worried he’d mess up, and he doesn’t like how the attention given to him makes him feel self-conscious about his reactions. With that being said, he prefers to give oral, as worshiping you feels natural.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual?)

He prefers a slower pace, whether he’s giving or receiving, although he can’t deny being at the receiving end of a rough pace doesn’t feel good.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies)

Andrew doesn’t understand the notion behind quickies, give him head before a match as a ‘good luck’, and he might just change his mind.

R = Risk (are they experimental? do they take risks?)

As I’ve said before, getting him to try out new things would require a lot of coaxing and patience, and there’s a limit to what he’s willing to try. Anything between daddy links and roleplay, he’s willing to try, but anything kinkier than that he’d pass.

Andrew doesn’t like taking risks, especially those that may impact your health. Being a gravedigger, he knows how many diseases the body can carry, and won’t stand for unprotected sex.

S = Stamina (how long do they last?)

Andrew, while a virgin, does have good stamina from his exercising, and if he’s not emotionally drained after one round, he can go for another.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them?)

He doesn’t know of many sex toys, and usually won’t use them. Of course, if you ask, he’s willing to put a vibrator in your hole while you suck his dick, but he’s somewhat hesitant to get the same treatment. Although, he might be willing to try some on himself, in private.

U = Unfair (how much do they like to tease?)

He doesn’t like teasing - he’s far too willing to give you whatever you want. There are also times where he thinks he’s being too harsh denying the things you’re begging for.

V = Volume (how loud are they?)

He tries to suppress his voice, at first, but when he’s more comfortable, he’s moaning and grunting. You won’t hear much dirty talk from him, as he’s much too shy to say such a thing. He’s also rather hesitant to communicate during sex, as he doesn’t want to disappoint you, so you’ll have to prompt him by asking if it feels good, etc. Sit him down beforehand and have a conversation about good communication during sex, and be stern about it, and then maybe he’ll tell you how he’s feeling.

W = Wild card (a random headcannon for the character)

If he’s in a polyamorous relationship (think VALE), he’s more than happy to stay on the sidelines and watch. However, if you’re in a monogamous relationship, he’s adverse to the idea of sharing.

X = X-ray (let's see what's going on under those clothes)

As he is an albino, his dick is as pale as the rest of him, flushing red at the tip when erect. It’s about 5.6 inches (14.2 cm), and a bit thicker than average.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

His sex drive is a bit lower than average, as his heightened anxiety makes it hard for him to think about sex; the drive mainly comes from wet dreams and roaming thoughts.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

He’s got a weak body, so regardless of the role he took in sex, and regardless of the intensity, he’ll be a tired mess. Perhaps you could convince him to drag himself out of bed for the day, but it’s unlikely he would be able to function as a normal person. It’s either sleep or a poorly programmed auto-pilot.

[seiberries]

Good day, dear!~ I'm an anon who asked you about crush headcanons and OMG, this sooo good! Especially I like Hiori, Chigiri and Nagi's ones! I enjoyed it a lot and you seem like a such a cute and adorable person! I love and adore your blog a lot!

Sooo, if you don't mind, can I ask you for Chigiri, Reo and Hiori headcanons as boyfriends?

LOVE YOU A LOT! Have a nice day~

good dayy, ahh im so happy that you liked how they turned out <33 and i appreciate the feedback, youre too sweet 💕 i love you lots too!! enjoy your dayy :>

blue lock boys : boyfriend hcs

includes: chigiri hyoma, hiori yo, mikage reo warnings: hiori’s backstory!

chigiri hyoma

being with chigiri is like dating a best friend- it’s supportive, honest, and filled with back-and-forths.

while he does find grandiose romantic gestures embarrassing, he always finds ways to bare his heart to you.

it’s all about the little things with him.

he notices your habits, when you’re happy, sad or, even agitated. he knows your way of thinking, and reads you like a book. he memorizes what you love; your orders in restaurants are engraved into his mind, as are the lyrics to your favorite songs.

the boy does all this to make-up for how awkward he is with words, knowing he isn’t the most gentle person. by nature, he’s the blunt type.

but, he will tone himself down as much as he can, for your sake. (not during your petty “for fun” arguments though, he has to win those; it’s cute when you’re annoyed.)

on bad days, though he cannot recite an essay of comforting words- chigiri will not leave your side under any circumstance.

speaking of him never leaving your side, he invites you to every single one of his games- always in the vip area, placed where you can see him best.

the rush he feels while running, knowing that you’re watching and cheering him on, can’t be beat. you are his boost, his energy.

won’t admit it, but he secretly waits for your praise after every match. it fuels his ego a lot, so choose your words wisely!! too many compliments result to a very red hyoma.

you, and only you, gets to touch his hair. if the hands running through his well-cared for locks aren’t yours, he doesn’t want them.

you styled his hair like rapunzel’s at one point, flowers and all. it’s your phone’s home screen.

chigiri as a boyfriend is a chigiri that matches his speed and heart with yours, regardless of how fast he is on the field.

hiori yo

dating hiori means having another half who’s always beside you somehow.

his love language is quality time, the sit in quiet type. a quiet with you, of course.

playing games together or engaging in separate activities, the company you share with him is enough either way.

he thinks of warmth to be any moment spent between you two, and he adores it. wise as ever, he knows that time is scarce, and is focused on what someone deems as important.

it half-shocks him when he realizes that he is important to you.

he just isn’t used to selfless love.

growing up in a place where love was earned by excellence, your boyfriend first learns the genuine version of it day by day, by your side.

bonding is crucial to him, in spite of his usual preference for being alone.

you play his video games with him, and he gets into anything you like. franchises, series, anything- if you enjoy it, he’s sure he will too.

he frequently buys matching merchandise and accessories; you match keychains, mugs, and controllers. it’s quite domestic.

forehead kiss enjoyer, for sure.

poor boy is touch starved. compared to other people in your life, hugs with him last longer.

he has a certain kind of smile reserved for you. he isn’t aware of it, but it’s the most gentle and soothing sight. it could soften anyone.

as a boyfriend, hiori’s favorite part in dating is being with you. (so, basically everything.)

mikage reo

a relationship with reo is romantic and grand, he spoils the heart.

the giver, he gives and gives; receiving presents from him happens on almost a daily basis. on days when it isn’t a tangible good, it’s a wonderfully prepared date.

he loves completely, you’ll never feel unwanted with him. the mikage is very open about how he feels, communication is hardly an issue.

while you do appreciate everything, he’s well aware that you’d have him- rags, or riches. (it doesn’t stop him from swiping his black card though, never has, never will.)

yes, he will carry your bags. yes, he’ll personally go to the grocery store to buy your cravings. he’s a boyfriend who loves doing things for you.

however- there is a small, very tiny part deep inside him that acts this way in fear of losing you. please don’t leave him.

it doesn’t go away until you confront him, you work on getting rid of the thought together.

he becomes more secure as time goes on, no worries; the knowledge that you stayed for so long comforts him.

it’s a constant battle to one up him in terms of surprises and displays of affection though, it’s practically impossible. (he prides himself on this.)

there are moments every once in awhile where his clinginess reaches its peak. he’s like a puppy then, attached to your side, seeking attention. (he’s adorable this way; the heir gets pouty when he doesn’t get what he wants.)

it’s not like you ever say no, how could you?

has a particular fondness for back hugs, on both your ends.

he really does shower you with love. (return it tenfold, okay?)

your boyfriend, reo, always makes sure with utmost certainty that you’re aware of how much you mean to him.

[boy-above]

gender and sexuality babbling because I've been figuring myself out again lately <3

so, over all i would say I identify with both gay and trans as umbrella terms. if i were talking to a loser who doesn't like micro labels that's probably how i would describe myself. but hopefully none of you are losers <3 firstly, i used to identify as a trans man for several years and i wouldn't say it's entirely inaccurate still, but i've realized lately that it's not entirely accurate either. i'm not entirely nonbinary. it's funny because i've already identified as nonbinary in the past, i went through several different labels; genderqueer, agender, bigender, etc. then i decided i was a binary trans man. now i'm back to nonbinary lmao. and although by definition i am nonbinary, for some reason the term doesn't vibe with me and i'm not sure why. i have no problem with the term in general and i've used it to describe myself in the past, it just feels strange to refer myself with it at the present. anyway, if i had to describe myself i say something like "boy but to the left", a boy but not quite. in technical terms i think demiboy describes me best. i don't think it's accurate to call myself a man anymore, and to be honest i've never quite liked the word to begin with, i much prefer to be called a boy than a man, but transphobes used to shame trans men who called themselves boys all the time, so i felt forced to call myself a man. i don't care what they think anymore lmao, i am a boy.

presentation wise, (and this is personal but i love over sharing on the internet <3) i am dysphoric, i want a flat chest and a dick. however i'm nonconventional because ive realized that going on testosterone would have probably negatively affected me, the only thing i'd really get out of it that i'd actually like is a deeper voice. the other stuff would kinda suck. for me, i wish people would look at me and know i'm a man, but i don't quite desire masculine features. something i realized recently that i've already made a post about is that it was very confusing to me for a long time because i wasn't sure what i wanted my gender presentation to be like. i had no idea what i wanted to look like, no transition goals, there was no "ideal me" i could strive for. i realized its because i just really don't want a physical form, i don't want to be perceived by people. being born into a meat body feels like a cruel joke by god (i mean being born in general feels like a cruel prank but we won't get into that right now lol.) i've realized that what i want to look like isn't physically achievable; if i had to choose what to look like, and this sounds cringe i know, but i'd want to be an anime boy, or a cute animal, or even a cloud of dust. anything but human. and realizing that looking the way i want to is genuinely impossible has actually helped me a lot because now i know there's nothing i'm doing wrong or could be doing differently, i would have dysphoria no matter what, even if i weren't trans i would still have dysphoria probably. it's made me glad i never went on T for example, honestly ive realized the reason i wanted to do it years ago was because it was just what you were "supposed" to do as a trans person, and i thought surely it would make me happy because everyone tells you it will. T would have made things worse honestly. top and bottom surgery is what would help me, absolutely, but i fear i'll never be able to have that.

now onto sexuality. i'm a gay man, "man" being up in the air honestly, but that's how i view myself. i'm also on the aro and ace spectrum though, so aroace is an umbrella term i identity with. more specifically, i'm cupioromantic and aegosexual. cupioromanticism is when you don't experience romantic attraction but wish you did (or at least desire a romantic relationship regardless, as for me personally i wish i knew what romantic attraction felt like, maybe there might be others who don't idk). i've never had a crush on anyone before, anyone real at least. i wish i had a boyfriend, i wish i had a cute boy who doted on me and treated me like porcelain, but i've never actually had feelings for someone real before. more recently ive developed crushes on fictional characters, but never someone real. i couldn't tell you why i prefer men over women when ive never experienced attraction before, it's just how things are for me. would i be considered an oriented aroace for that?

anyway, my sexuality. tmi again <3 i am shameless and care not if yall know about me yall are my pookies.

what aegosexuality looks like for me is that i only have sexual interest in fiction. i describe it as being gay in theory but not in practice. i like reading smut and watching porn but don't really masturbate, it doesn't do much for me, it's kinda just like regular entertainment for me? and when i envision sexual scenarios the hard rule is that i myself am never involved in them, its only fictional characters doing stuff with each other, i'm never a factor. the idea of imagining myself in sexual scenarios is very unpleasant to me, i don't want sexual contact with people. the idea of someone touching me like that gives me the heebie jeebies, and the idea of anything going in my coochie sounds genuinely traumatic LMAO (that might be because of dysphoria idk.) i've never felt sexual attraction to a real person before and don't imagine i ever will, real human people are just not attractive in the slightest to me, maybe that's why i don't want to look human myself idk lol. more recently i've felt attraction to fictional characters, only anime boys really. venti the sexual awakening that you are. that's not a joke by the way, venti was literally a sexual awakening for me, i would say he's the first thing i've ever felt sexual desire for lmaooooo. that's his power truly. i've said before "i'm asexual except when venti" and i wasn't lying.

also! i don't identify as lgbt. by definition am i? yes. but you will not catch myself calling myself lgbt. if you use the label yourself that's totally fine of course, most people do. but i lived through peak exclusionist discourse where people were using the label to exclude and discriminate against anyone who didn't fit into the four letter acronym, and that includes nonbinary people as well because they "didn't count as trans", it was truly the trenches. that era was honestly traumatic for me and pieces of shit like that bullied a lot of people back into the closet. i identify as queer, the queer community was supportive during that time. if someone described themself as queer, 9.5/10 times they were safe, they weren't a bigot. obviously there is nuance but please don't take what im saying in bad faith here, the point is that i'm queer and i think the lgbt+ label has been used to exclude so many people, so it's completely soured it for me and i dont want to touch it. queer is simple, queer is inclusive, queer doesn't require you to label yourself beyond the word if you don't want to. for me its the perfect, safest, homiest umbrella term. i love being queer.

anyway that's my rambling <3333 if anyone wants to drop their own gender or sexual bullfuckery in the replies or on anon or whatever feel free to hmu, i love talking with people and oversharing i love you guysssss

[agenderpunked]

just finished lost. will not be recovering, ever, me thinks...

I'M GONNA RAMBLE BECAUSE WHAT WAS THAAAAT OUUUUUGH I DIDN'T SEE ANY OTHER WAY FOR IT ALL TO END BUT THE FACT THAT IT *IS* WHAT THEY WENT WITH hURTS

I have so many thoughts and many of them are spoilers so if you haven't watched Lost (2004) stop reading this and go watch it instead.

- Jack dying in the same place he started. The cinematography and spiritual implications of making a trek back to the beginning and finally closing his eyes... DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON VINCENT LYING DOWN NEXT TO HIM I CRIIIIIIIIIIIED. THE DOG KNOWS "LIVE TOGETHER OR DIE ALONE" AND HE MAKES SURE JACK DOESN'T DIE ALONE IM IN SHAMBLESSSSS DONT TALK TO ME

- rose and bernard. i care you so bad. i want a bob ross energy survival show spin off that just follows them making their cabin and garden and traps and such and exploring the area around their cabin. Unproblematic favs, truly. THE FACT NO ONE BELIEVED ROSE WHEN SHE SAID SHE KNEW HER HUSBAND WAS ALIVE???? who visited you and told you that? are you just that faithful??? Did that hope, faith, and love protect both of you from dying on the island before you found each other??

BC ALSO. sorry but i view faith as energy, and when you focus and devote that energy to something it becomes concentrated, and what do our brains run on? electricity. what is everything about Lost about? electromagnetism. What can spirits fuck with? electromagnetic frequencies. That energy can be used to attract what you're searching for. Rose is such a necessary character ESPECIALLY for Jack's development because of how she displays such radical acceptance when she knows there are things she cannot change, ie. cancer, being trapped on the island, being surrounded by danger, and focuses instead on what she can, confirming her husband's status, creating an environment that feels safe, and enjoying the time she has left with the people she loves.

- Boone and Shannon getting into a bar fight at the end??? Boone walking up to Hurley and chatting??? Boone and Shannon are severely underrated characters in my opinion, and it's 100% from the emotionally incestuous aspects of them, which is a shame because I truly believe they are one of the most realistic depictions of relationships like that that I've seen in media. I didn't immediately like Boone. I thought he was an asshole because the show presents Shannon and Boone to you as they would an unhappy romantic relationship, but they never confirm it, even joke about it, to the point I nearly immediately realized 'They're not dating at all. They're siblings that were emotionally neglected by their parents and are codependent as all hell.'

Watching further, I was so scared to think I'd find Boone slander all up and down in the fandom while Shannon gets victimized and absolved of her fucked up actions, because of the way we immediately see Boone treat her without the context for understanding their relationship and that Boone was only on 815 to bail her out of another abusive relationship. But what I actually got from the fandom was NOTHING. ABOUT EITHER OF THEM!!!!

HOW ARE WE NOT TALKING ABOUT BOONE HALLUCINATING SHANNONS DEATH AND ADMITTING THAT HE WAS UTTERLY RELIEVED 😭😭😭 IM GONNA BLOW MYSELF UP ABOUT IT GOOD GOD.

The fact that Shannon also does find a potentially healthy relationship with Sayid, and that Sayid can allow himself to feel and care for someone and have gentle and tender moments in such a hostile environment while serving as the groups main mercenary, and make her feel safe, regardless of her clearly morally skewed history of dating. Sayid has morals, and he wants to stick to them, but he's been put in environments that do not allow him to adhere to that. He has restraint, and emotional intelligence. The glimpse we get into Shannon's life shows she hasn't been around men of those qualities, at least recently, save for Boone, who even then, doesn't compare next to Sayid. Imagining how Shannon would have felt about Sayid being brought back in the temple and seeing how extremely empty and different he is 😟

- Thinking about the general implications of what the island is, as well... Did they ever survive the initial crash? When they leave the island, were they alive? or was it merely an illusion of life? Is death on the island equivalent to someone accepting that they're dead and moving on for realsies? Is the island symbolizing purgatory? The themes of duality and shadows and light and twins are also not lost on me and rank this media even higher because these were not on my bingo card or prior knowledge of the show and they are damn near a critical criteria for intriguing me and getting me into a media.

Are the souls whispering in the forest of the island trapped there? Michael says they can't move on, but is it a personal choice grappling with what they did? Or is it related to actions done after death, while passing through purgatory, that decides whether you are bound to a place or able to move freely???

Oooooooough.....

[acourtofthought]

"Such a romantic scene, right? Az lending Elain TT because he didn't want to upset Mor by taking it into battle with him? It's ridiculous how you romanticize that scene while completely ignoring how we got there." Umm.... what? Not the same anon but I'm confused by this👆🏻. I ship elriel AND elucien bcuz I'm an Elain girl first and foremost. So I'm happy with either or both. But I think you're the one who's ignoring the author's narrative. Sjm made a point of describing how everyone present were shocked/surprised that Azriel gave Elain the truth-teller and it had nothing to do with Mor. Sjm made sure that readers know that it's an important scene.

I suggest you read this post

Sarah wants you paying attention to to what's happening in between, the little crumbs when you think she's just getting wordy because that's where you'll find the true intentions

Characters saying "oh look! Az never gave TT to anyone!" is in your face. The subtle point, the crumb, is that he only gave it to Elain because Mor begged Az, tears in her eyes to sit out of battle . Where he was fully prepared to disobey Rhys.... But listened for Mor. Meaning he would have taken TT into battle had his true love not convinced him to stay behind.

So no, you are the one ignoring what happened. Just like you're ignoring how Az refused to give Elain a quick lesson when she expressed concern on not knowing how to use it.

Az was literally like "it's foolproof so take this" and Elain said "I don't know how to use it" and Az.... Said nothing.

Just how you're ignoring how SJM said Elain returned it and walked away without looking back. Meaning regardless of what happened between them, it actually didn't mean much at all in terms of their future together because that moment is in Elain's past and she chose to not look back.

You're distracted by the pretty flashy, sparkly scene, the characters getting all big eyed because Az lent it out while ignoring WHY he was able to lend it out and how he gave Elain zero tips on dagger handling. He's a warrior who offered to train Feyre how to fly yet left Elain defenseless on what to actually do with TT. You're completely missing what the author is trying to tell you in the wordy details, the red flags of this scene because you're too busy mooning over how cute you think it is that Az gave it to her.

And you're forgetting that Elain honestly didn't seem to give a damn that he gave it to her in the first place.

You claim to care about Elain while you seem more fixated on what Az does than what she does.

She returned TT then walked away without looking back.

She returned his necklace and had no further interactions, didn't seem to be all that upset in the months following.

She vocalized how she's not a child to be fought over then Az turns around boasting he'd defeat Lucien in a duel to the death.

She said they don't get to tell her what she can or can't do yet Az, behind her back, says she shouldn't be exposed to the darkness of the Trove though believes Nesta can and Amren has to reprimand him.

Where Elain said she would try to reacquaint herself with her powers yet Az never offered to help her.

Where Az avoided Elain during her time of need because he wanted to go to the CON or couldn't stand her bond that as we're told, will always be a bond.

You are not an Elain girl first and foremost when all you care about is having Az get what he claims to want when it's clear he's got zero respect for Elain when it actually matters. Where he refuses to treat her as an equal.

[homosexualasstransbian]

im transfem/nonbinary and honestly the whole cutesy uwu anime girl puppy girl aesthetic is making me feel ill. i recently got harrassed by a cis woman chaser who saw the transflag in my bio and started talking to me in this really weird overly cutesy way and started flirting with me, i told her im taken and not interested and this is weird and she said something like "oki u silly transie, if u ever need a girly to do something for you im here, cuz nornal girls are boring" and then the next day she sent me some image of some anime girl w/ the caption "im not like other girls, i have a massive cock" and asked "this u?" and she was so weird and gross and overly cutesy. and like the fact im trans is part of me and im proud of it but i want to be seen as me, as a person, as smthn beyond arbitrary boxes. thats why im nonbinary, i dont wanna be forced into some made up vague perception of how i have to be and instead just be me and do my own thing. i dont label my sexuality either but im pretty sure im like pretty aromantic. greyromantic or whatever its called. and my sexuality i kinda tie together with my romantic attraction, so its often incredibly odd to me how prevalent sexual language and stuff is online and how weirdly its treated as smthn normal, especially in more queer communities. and when i feel terrible and get support online, ppl will say ooo ur pretty ooo ur cute dont be sad and downplay it when i need someone to talk to qnd need to be acknoledged beyond how i physically am, it makes me feel rlly objectified and like my only value is in the fact that i am trans and how i look, and its my only thing and the only way ppl refer to me and boil me down to. but i dont want to be some cutesy meme girl, i want ppl to acknowledge me and what i do and like and love and enjoy and hate and dislike and think and say, i want to be seen and understood regardless of and beyond my transness. because im a raw, living breathing human person thats infinitely complex, and i just wanna be me and do what i enjoy. i dont want my personality boiled down to superficial aspects of me that exists solely because outside society needed a label for it to ostrasize or fetishize it. im sorry for the long rant its just rlly frustrating, especially when you try to find communities and its just so weirdly sexual and condescending and objectifying 😭

hey unfortunately, i do not have the mental capacity to be able to read all of this and actually respond to it, i just lose 80% of the ask once I'm finished reading, so I'll just say: damn fuck that cis bitch.

While i get that after your experiences this "aesthetic" might make you feel ill, i really don't see why i should be told this.

I do not choose the way i present to other people because it's what i feel i should look or act like, i act however feels good to me. the reason my blog looks like this is because, put simply, i like it.

I may not be just a puppy, girl or gay, in fact the most accurate way to describe me would be "thing that should not be alive as far as anyone knows, but it persists, it's also a puppy that is a girl, a robot, a void and divine flesh"

but i go with my current aesthetic, username, and whatever else because they're the descriptions I'm most confident in, they make me feel nice, i love them.

I am quite literally a tranny girl faggot that acts like a puppy sometimes.

Sometimes i feel like I'm a shattered vessel built of divine flesh that's empty and yet so completely full.

Sometimes i wish my flesh melted away, permanently fusing me with the outer shell of a mech.

None of my identities are fully separate or stable, but they also feel distinct enough that i only choose one at a time (and even then sometimes they can split apart).

I don't act like this because i wanna be "haha silly cute trans girl that's an adorable puppy and is so so overly sexual", it's just what i act like, in general, if I don't worry about pretending to be someone else.

I guess put simply: if you don't like me: fucking leave, block me, get rid of me, i won't hold it against you, I'll continue to do what i like, the way i like doing it, because this is my blog.

i forgot where i was going with this post, y'all just get this really long one i guess.

[everythingcorn]

Mini Character Analysation of any potential EggMisu because I miss them:

Last post was about MangoNanas headcanons, and right before the headcanons I mentioned a ship name for the two of them that’s reflecting on their T/B dynamic. I did the same thing with EggMisu, but I was much more successful with it haha. The alternate ‘better sounding’ name for EggMisu could be TiraNog, but I think they’re both fine! I’ll be using EggMisu.

Anyway, Eggnog and Tiramisu’s relationship could really develop in a ton of ways. Many of them I see never being official, others I see being one sided, and complicated…

I want to talk about them a bit, specifically the unofficial, unreciprocated, and complicated ones.

For the “Unofficial”, to me I more or less see it as attraction being present, however they aren’t doing anything about it.

Eggnog really cares about Tiramisu, he’s proud to have successfully gotten the kid to warm up to him and he’s glad the two of them are such good partners. They work well together despite their opposing personalities and preferences in work flow. Eggnog is glad to have Tiramisu Cookie as both a coworker and as a friend. Which is why his positive emotions start to get the better of him and he starts viewing the kid in a different way. A more romantic way.

Tiramisu is a major grump when things don’t go his way, he finds Eggnog infuriating when he doesn’t outright acknowledge Tiramisu’s protests or requests, but he doesn’t hate the guy. He really likes him actually, he appreciates the effort Eggnog puts into their relationship and to Tira it really does seem like Eggnog knows just what to do when things get tough. When Eggnog makes a mistake, he corrects himself right away, quick to making a better decision. When Tiramisu makes a mistake, Eggnog is quick to forgive him, to reassure him that things happen and all you can do now is learn from it to make sure it doesn’t happen again. Tiramisu really likes him, maybe sometimes even more than just a good friend.

But that’s weird though; to both of them. Tiramisu is just a train conductor, a young one at that, and Eggnog is fucking Santa Claus. Their relationship cannot go past a friendship level, it feels wrong and it’s frankly immoral, so they have no reason to bring it up to each other. It would only cause problems.

But, regardless, their eyes continue to linger on each other for a bit too long… Their conversations trail on to the littlest of things just to hear each others voices for a moment more… Their once-in-a-while hugs are held onto for a tad too many seconds… But they can’t bring it up, they shouldn’t bring it up. It just causes problems.

They’re just coworkers, and really good friends.

For the “Unnreciprocated”, the attraction is at the hands of either or. I’m more focused on the attraction coming from Eggnog’s side simply because I feel like negative emotions could be stronger (it that makes sense lol i like angst :v) , but attraction from Tiramisu’s side will definitely also be a little disheartening.

For Eggnog, the kid really is one of kind for him. He isn’t really sure when he’s ever felt such affection and connection to another cookie. He can’t think of any friends who he’s cared for on such a deep level, and although he loves his family with all his heart the care for him doesn’t at all amount to the care and adoration he has for that little reindeer… That little train conductor kid Tiramisu.

He feels like he probably shouldn’t be thinking of this. Tiramisu is a young kid, and Eggnog feels like he’ll just get in the way of the kids development. He doesn’t want to disturb Tiramisu’s maturing process, since trying to involve himself in any way past a work or friendship level could really throw the kid off and he may accidentally have Tiramisu depend on him too much. Also, Tiramisu probably doesn’t even feel the same way. If anything; Eggnog may just be a good pal to him.

And he would be right.

For the “Complicated”, it‘s more or less the Unofficial but with extra steps… and those extra steps are dirty and dark.

Eggnog and Tiramisu have finally told each other, they had their heart to heart and they finally let all their sugar rip from their bags into their bowl, but at what cost?

They can’t do anything else from here. A relationship farther from this is a slippery path to go down, and even admitting their feelings was a tough rope to walk on. It simply isn’t just the societal standards, it’s also both cookies sense of moral. Eggnog letting himself get this far with his feelings for this kid leave him dreaded, sort of like the same worries he had in the “Unreciprocated” hc.

Tiramisu is worried that if anyone catches on, their relationship will be disrupted. He knows that there’s certainly cookies who would disapprove (if not everyone), and he doesn’t want to risk anything bad happening to him or Eggnog if the knowledge of their relationship fell into the lap of someone who’d want to see them apart. Tira knows they probably shouldn’t be doing this in the first place, but he wants the freedom to care for who he wants to care for, regardless of who it is.

They can certainly get a bit closer in private, maybe set up dates to remote areas to spend more time together, but it’ll still all feel so wrong.

Because it is.

That’s all! Of course there’s a million ways to view these two, and a million different altering paths their relationship could go down, but I don’t have the time or energy to fit it all in this one Tumblr post anyway… (Even if I’d very much love to.)

I think that the complicatedness of their relationship is wonderful and it should really be considered and explored. I think no matter how you look at these two, whether it be the sweetest and purest interpretation of any relationship they could have, there will always be a tidbit that sticks out… It’s just the nature of their differing personalities and how they clash.

I spent a lot of time on this single post, and if I’ll be honest I had it sitting in my drafts since Christmas… It was fun to write and I loved thinking about these two for so long. It also gave me a few fic ideas too, not sure if I’ll ever get to them.

If anyone read this all thank you! I hope it was insightful and thought provoking… \(o^..^)