#is he altair’s sugar daddy?

[teecupangel]

Just got thrown for a nostalgia loop and had an idea: AC x Lunar Chronicles. I don’t even know where my brain is going with this but it would be so cool.

In my brain, the obvious thing would be that the Templars are Lunars since the whole mind control deelio fits their vibe but what if Desmond was like half Lunar. And/Or what if Desmond was a cyborg? And the ancestors are actual memories uploaded into robots?

Or what if Desmond just gets transported into the Lunar Chronicles universe and, because of Isu DNA, he’s immune to Lunar Glamour without being a Shell.

Or or, he gets transported there as a Lunar child but with all the memories of original Desmond and has to figure out what the fuck is Glamour and how to use it.

My initial idea would be the Lunars are an evolution of the Isus who left Earth before the Solar Flare (or didn’t go to Earth in the first place) but turning them into the Templar equivalent in this setup would be a nice change (since I did turn the people of the Moon in the Sailor Moon AU into Isus already XD).

So for this one, the Templars had long ‘converted’ the Lunars into their ideology but it becomes wrapped by the feeling of superiority the Lunars easily find thanks to their capabilities for mind control. The idea of ‘Total Control will Bring Absolute Peace’ that the Templars have been trying to push forward will be lost in the process thanks to the selfishness being brought out by the total power the Lunars have on people.

In this situation, Winter isn’t the epitome of what the Templar wanted because she refused to use her ‘gift’ but she would mistake the Templar’s cause to something like “Order is necessary to bring peace”.

Of course, we’ll set Desmond up in this world as a scifi fairy tale character. My initial idea was to turn her to the transmigrated equivalent of Wizard of Oz where he awakens as the only child of a Lunar family that isn’t really high up there in the hierarchy to be considered a ‘danger’ to the politics of Lunars but high enough that he would be raised with a semi-silver spoon.

Of course, we picked Wizard of Oz (and ignore the fact that it’s technically not one of the classic fairy tales) because this gives us the chance to give Desmond his ancestors:

The Scarecrow

The Tinman

The Lion

The Lion is Ratonhnhaké:ton, a human captured to become a slave of Desmond’s family. Of course, Desmond says no to this and they only pretend to be master and slave while trying to find Ratonhnhaké:ton’s tribe who had gone into hiding after their settlement had been attacked. Ratonhnhaké:ton wants to find his people who were also captured like him and Desmond usually helps him either by buying them when security is too tight or by finding ways to help Ratonhnhaké:ton break them out as quietly as possible.

The Tinman is Ezio who is an android that was gifted to Desmond when he was a baby, to be both his companion and his guard. He’s pretty much Desmond’s butler and minder and gets roped into Desmond and Ratonhnhaké:ton’s plans because he has to make sure Desmond is safe and won’t get into trouble. He acts more like an older brother to Desmond and Ratonhnhaké:ton most of the time but he is also bound to report everything Desmond does to his parents thanks to a chip that has been installed into him.

The Scarecrow is Altaïr and we have two option: Earthean or Lunar. Regardless of which one he is, his main problem is that he wants to receive the recognition he deserves for his works in a scholarly field (Quantum physics? Idk, something connected to how Desmond got transmigrated to this world). His work has been taken by an older more influential Lunar either because (if he’s an Earthean) he’s an Earthean and his peers think he’s lower than them or (if he’s a Lunar) he’s from a fallen Lunar family who perhaps helped slaves run away and has been stripped of their ranks. Regardless, Desmond becomes more or less his financial backer because Desmond believes that Altaïr might be able to figure out how to get Desmond back to his world (or, at the very least, let him get into contact with them).

Now, here’s the fun part. Does Desmond remember them as his ancestors?

It would be fun if he does and would give Desmond a reason to trust them as soon as he meets them.

An alternative would be that Desmond’s memories of them (aka: his time in the Animus) is blank. Only his memories as Desmond Miles are vivid. He knows he used the Animus to get stronger but he doesn’t remember what he saw in the Animus.

Another alternative is that he starts to remember them only after meeting them or after his relationship with them is at the point where they trust each other.

Regardless of which it is, the main point is that the three does not remember their past lives (or, Altaïr’s theory, their alternate life) but their personality are quite similar to what Desmond is used to.

To hammer in the Wizard of Oz setting, the courage that Ratonhnhaké:ton is meant to receive is finally understanding the difference between being courageous and being reckless. Ezio’s ‘heart’ is the character development he would have as he become more and more like Desmond and Ratonhnhaké:ton’s older brother. Altaïr’s ‘brain’ is the recognition for his works. Desmond is modeled as both Dorothy and the Wizard of Oz as he meets them and grants them their wish. Toto the dog is gonna be an android corgi dog named Des.

Desmond’s parents are actually Glinda (Minerva) and the Wicked Witch of the West (Juno). Minerva believes that letting Desmond do what he wants will make him understand his place in their world. Juno helps in the background while trying to nudge Desmond into understanding his place as a Lunar (and maybe she’s planning a coup to become the most powerful Lunar, who knows? That’s like plot D in this one)

[reddeaddamnation]

Masterlist or the new Bible of the Holy trinity Desmond, Clay and Daniel

Because the old one got messed up after I changed my URL

Dirty A-Z headcanons

Alexios

Altair ibn-La’Ahad

Yusuf Tazim

Desmond Miles

Crawford Starrick

Charles Vane

Haytham Kenway

Ezio Auditore da Firenze

Elise de la Serre

Edward Kenway

Arno Dorian

Evie Frye

Connor Kenway

Jacob Frye

Shay Cormac

Shaun Hastings

Henry Green

Daniel Cross

Clay Kaczmarek

Preferences

How they would propose to you

Spending Halloween with them

Them surprising you with dinner

When they find out your daughter has a boyfriend pt.1

When they find out your daughter has a boyfriend pt.2

Them finding your sex toys

How the assassins are when they catch a cold

When your child says they want a sibling

Messing up with them and asking for forgiveness

Training with them

When they make you cry

When they are jealous

When you say you want to go shopping

Being in a relationship with them

How they would react to your teasing [Jacob and Arno]

When you call them daddy for the first time

Playfully stealing something of their’s

Them going to the dentist

Being their ex and meeting them for the first time after your breakup

How the assassins are in bed vs. how they are outside it

Spending new year with them

When they come home drunk

When your child does something they shouldn’t have

When they find out your ex is beating you

Teasing them during a dinner with friends and leaving them hanging:

When you give him a boner while sitting on his lap

Trying on lingerie and them walking in on you

When they tease you so much you lose your mood

What color lingerie he would like you wearing for his birthday

Giving them a massage

What they would do to make things right after messing up with you

Waking up beside them 

How the assassins are when they sleep

The assassins taking you camping

When you interview them for a job

How training with them is like

How they react when you tell them you don’t want children

How they would react to finding out you aren’t the gender they thought you were

Being a rebel and the assassins falling in love with you

How they celebrate your birthday

Being in a relationship with the assassins

Being Romani and meeting them 

Being Slavic and meeting them

Being Finnish and dating them

Imagine being an Egyptian and dating the assassins

Having a pet cat that doesn’t like your assassin boyfriend/girlfriend

Having a big guard dog that doesn’t like your assassin boyfriend

How they would react to you being arachnophobic

How they would react to you getting a kiss from someone else

How they would treat you if you were anorexic

How the assassins are during an argument

When they ask you about your scars:

Giving them a handjob at the cinema

Them losing you while you’re giving birth to your child

Them singing you a song

When they’re possessive of you

How the assassins would react to you bringing home a stray animal

How they would react to you stealing a kill from them

How they would deal with you after you drank too much

When you and your ex have to go on a mission without them

How they would react when you tell them you’re pregnant

Playing horror games with them

How the assassins are when they are jealous:

Trying to get your phone back but accidentally grabbing their crotch (HT)

Imagine being gone for a long time and catching them jack off when you return home (HT)

Imagine riding them on the Animus (HT)

Imagine them having the bleeding effect but you staying anyway (HT)

HT imagine: Family dinner

Imagine: Clay, Daniel and Desmond interviewing you for a job

Stories

Being leader of a rivaling organization and trying to bring down both assassins and templars

If “Happy ever after did exist” Chapter 1 - Desmond Miles

Scenarios/Headcanons

How they would react to each other’s music taste

Being their twin sister: Ezio, Arno and Desmond

Imagine going with them to the zoo

Being married to Jacob

Imagine a highschool where:

Imagine the assassins going on a trip together

The assassins living together

The assassins living together pt.2

Assassins as dogs

The assassins as students

A very Creed-y Christmas

Dating Arno Dorian

Imagine the assassins going together on a trip to the mountains

Imagine the assassins together at the beach

The assassins as cats

Living with them

Imagine them having a water balloon fight

“I could get it, just don’t ask how”

Imagine: Clay, Desmond and Daniel as little animals and you adopting them

Playing Seven minutes in Heaven with them

Altair and Malik fighting over you

What nickname would be their favorite to call you

Haytham as a doctor

Imagine sharing a tight space with Haytham

One shots

Imagine an Assassin’s creed game set in Bulgaria

Jacob Frye

Imagine being Starrick’s daughter and dating Jacob

Having an argument with Jacob

Imagine Jacob pulling up a tent in front of your house

Being a gang leader and catching Jacob’s attention

Getting married to Jacob

Imagine being forcefully married to Starrick and having an affair with Jacob

Being forcefully married to Starrick and secretly helping Jacob bring him down

Jacob being under house arrest

Being Jacob’s lover and Jack the ripper abducting you

Being Jacob’s lover and Jack the ripper abducting you part 2

Haytham Kenway

Request

Stealing Haytham’s amulet

Haytham being your sugar daddy pt.1

Haytham being your sugar daddy pt.2

“Perfect” 

Arno Dorian

Arno saving you from the guillotine

Being Bellec’s daughter and meeting Arno

Being a Templar and being in love with Arno

Arno catching your daughter doing his mission instead of being in school

Being engaged to Bellec but having an affair with Arno

Elise dying during childbirth and you helping Arno with parenthood

“Never enough”

Being agoraphobic and Arno comforting you

Arno Dorian having a crush on you

“Turning page”

Being Arno’s lover

Ezio Auditore

Ezio Talking dirty to you in Italian

Ezio getting jealous that you talk to Salai

“The girl from the neighborhood“

Che vuola questa musica? // Who wants this music tonight?

“Perfect”

Being a Borgia and dating Ezio:

Being Leonardo da Vinci’s student and meeting Ezio

“Rebirthing”

Bayek of Siwa

Modern day job AU

Being a Roman aristocrat and Bayek saving you from getting assassinated

Car sex with him

Watching him fight in the arena

Alexios

Request

Being a falconer and meeting him

Falling in love with Deimos Alexios

Deimos Alexios watching you fight

Deimos Alexios being obsessed with you

Missing Alexios and Barnabas telling you stories about him

Being a Persian and Alexios finding you stranded on the beach

Deimos Alexios finding out you work with Kassandra

Joining his crew

Alexios doing silly things to get your attention

Otso Berg

Request

Shay Cormac

Request

Being a Portuguese Templar and Shay falling in love with you

Lydia Frye

Being a Templar and Lydia’s lover

Crawford Starrick

Crawford Starrick being your sugar daddy

Being a rebel and Starrick falling for you

Desmond Miles

Forgetting Desmond’s birthday and making up for it

“Closer”

Being Desmond’s sister

Hope Jensen

Being Shay’s younger sister and Hope being in love with you

Shaun Hastings

Throwing a surprise party for Shaun’s birthday

Being an assassin and Shaun falling for you

Clay Kaczmarek

Getting back at Clay for tricking you with his dirty talking

Clay talking dirty to you in Polish

“Whispers in the dark”

Pierre Bellec

Convincing Pierre to adopt little Arno after his father’s death

Altair ibn-La’Ahad

“I’ll be there”

“Dooset daram” / “I love you”

“Brother”

Edward Kenway

Being born on a ship and afraid of land

“Havana”

Edward Kenway being impressed with your pirating skills

Edward saving you from getting killed (sequel to the above)

Malik al’Sayf

Being there for Malik when he loses his arm

Connor Kenway

Being a Templar and running away with Connor after he saves you from getting killed part 3

Being a Templar and Connor saving you from getting killed part 2

Being a Templar and Connor falling in love with you  part 1

Being a captive of the English and Connor freeing you

Evie Frye

Meeting Evie for the first time and falling in love with her 

[teecupangel]

So I just got some chicks today (baby chickens), and my one dog is already super protective of them, growling and nipping at his brother when he gets too close to the brooder. Just made me think, how would the ancestor's react to each other, in regards to Desmond, if they'd been pulled to the modern time? Haven't played AC3 yet, but I dont believe Altair knew anything about Desmond, and of course Ezio knew his name. I'd feel Ezio would be pretty protective of Desmond, especially post temple.

This would primarily depend on when they would be pulled from their time into the modern day. For this scenario, the easiest setup would be to pull them the moment during the time that they are holding an Apple of Eden.

Ratonhnhaké:ton would be easy as we could use the time that he was about to drop the Apple into the sea.

For Ezio, we have a lot of possible candidates but, since you want Ezio to know about Desmond and make him pretty protective of him, I would suggest we take Ezio just as he was about to put the Apple into the Colleseum vault. Revelations!Ezio only touched an Apple after he was ready to finally retire so it would be a bit of a bitchslap to take that tired Ezio.

Altaïr would be the easiest to take out as he used his Apple frequently but if you want an Altaïr with just a hint of arrogance still clinging to him, you can yank him out just as he took the Apple from Abbas during Al Mualim’s funeral fire.

(Of course, if your main request is simply for Desmond to get all the loving and to be spoiled like crazy, you can just yank all three of them during their deathbeds, give them their body during their prime, and, voila, instant Assassin sugar daddies… or sugar mentors?)

Now, of how they would react to Desmond himself…

Ratonhnhaké:ton has no real connection with Desmond but that makes them work well together. They’re more on the side of acquaintances getting to know one another since Desmond only saw enough memories to know who Ratonhnhaké:ton but in a sense of ‘hey, remember this guy?’. His Bleeding Effect hasn’t fully sunk in so Ratonhnhaké:ton is more or less the least ‘connected’ to him. His relationship with Ratonhnhaké:ton is also the least complicated because of that and their relationship would simply grow organically. In terms of protectiveness, Ratonhnhaké:ton knows Desmond can take care of himself but he also believes that Desmond has the habit of ignoring the danger to focus on the mission or task at hand so he keeps an eye on him whenever they’re together.

Ezio knows how important Desmond is and is more inclined to side with him, mainly because Desmond is ‘familiar’ and he knows from Minerva’s message that Desmond is meant to save the world. Once he hears that it meant that Desmond was supposed to die and the only reason why he didn’t is because of the three of them connecting their Apples to Desmond’s Apple during that pivotal moment (even if it’s by accident or they don’t know why), he’d definitely be protective of Desmond.

Altaïr and Desmond would have the most complicated relationship, mainly because of how one-sided it is. At least Ezio knows of him and knows of their connection but Altaïr does not. Any connection Desmond feels would just be on his side and that would be painful to bear, especially on how aloof Altaïr could be. Altaïr would be more or less confused by Desmond’s actions towards him but, at the same time, he would be unable to resist the feeling of warmth that Desmond gives him. Being more or less raised as a lonely child, Desmond’s presence would be more pleasing and he would have the desire to hoard it. The day he starts resisting is the day that his ‘restraints’ go out the window. Out of the three, Altaïr would be the most possessive of Desmond, being the one to always stand too close or call for Desmond’s attention. He’s trying to be more of a team player and not be so standoffish but he tends to forget that when he’s trying to get Desmond’s attention. Thankfully for him, Ezio and Ratonhnhaké:ton are understanding men, and Desmond… well… Desmond knows this is pretty much on par with Altaïr anyway.

… this will definitely end up with Desmond having a harem. XD

Unorganized Ideas:

Bill is on their shit list. There’s no way he wouldn’t be. Among the three, Ratonhnhaké:ton would be the most ‘cordial’ simply because Bill reminds him of Haytham which is NOT a good thing, all things considered.

Ezio will learn about Clay and he would mourn the loss of a brother he didn’t even know. Whether Clay lives on as some kind of data that got saved in Rebecca’s Animus is up to you though.

Shaun will be hyperventilating once he sees them. He has sooooooo many questions and all that is keeping him from going ‘wild’ is Rebecca.

They will need a lot of time to acclimate to the modern day. During that time, they would lay low and rumors of Desmond’s death will circulate. Desmond wouldn’t even know about it since he was in a perpetual state of shock and amusement. Shock that he’s still alive and was meant to die. Amusement because he’s fucking teaching them things like how the toilet works.

Altaïr has the easiest time understanding tech. On the other hand, he is also a dumbass who microwaved a metal spoon because Desmond insisted that they shouldn’t microwave metal. Desmond learns early on that the best way to teach Altaïr is to explain to him why these and that is not allowed instead of expecting Altaïr to just nod and not do things.

The moment they are proficient enough to use a laptop or a phone and have access to the internet… uuhhh… well… humanity is both beautiful and also the worst thing to ever happen to the world, that’s the ongoing theme that Desmond is now stuck in.

[fanworldbuildingfun]

Isu-era time travel

*looks at the whole time paradox of Zero Eclipse*

*looks at the “Juno and Aita’s artificial child” part*

Imagine if Desmond going back in the first place and dealing with all the drama of being Juno’s one and favorite child changes the future?

So after he uses the Temple instead of dying, he gets hit with full bundle of memories his Isu-Self experienced after travelling back in time. Sage-style. And given how long-living Isu were, and that doubtlessly his “parents” would have tried best to “educate” him, first thing he does is start an argument. By calling Juno “mother”

Or something of the like

(dear heaven the whole Elijah situation can get so awkward)

(I’ll just skip the whole “Adha is past incarnation of Desmond” because I’m still floating the happy feelings post the other Adha post ;_; This one is – nope *ugly weeping but still peeking through fingers because this would also be *fascinating*. However, does this also mean Altair is also caught in rebirth loop? For him to see Desmond die over and over)

The POE option is fun, though brings along the whole other aspect of “so close yet so far” wherein you can share minds but not touch. Unless something else is done about it – e.g. like Shroud of Consus, which gave way to possession

…What if the POE with Desmond is given to Cesare Borgia and he ends up possessed? This would be even worse than Cantarella, depending on which period of time is to be taken into account

Mind, the Temple idea is also fun, though waaay more likely to end up with Desmond being worshipped as deity – very Isu, but very “Please stop. Just… Please no” on Desmond’s part. Altair WOULD fare fine in this scenario, but better not let Ezio anywhere near there. Though! Imagine a small cult sticking around the are of the Temple, even if they can’t access it. And when Ezio comes? They see it as Ezio being the second Prophet and now the previous one can be laid to rest

(this one is sad for Desmond)

An Isu body before 21st century

Hmmm. Do three groups of three still qualify? *side-eyes the Egyptian Ennead and the whole Thing Ancient Egypt had for Afterlife* These are so… Good for founding the entire “resurrection” or  “memory” part of Isu research

I can easily imagine that. Does this change Eivor’s outlook on Desmond? Does he think that Desmond is Víðarr who liver this long, or does he think he is like him, a reborn person? (granted, “original” Víðarr would be the more likely option given Isu-height, but would make things so complicated for Desmond who is unlikely to know any things that he would be expected to remember)

…This sidetracked me from Nephilim and straight into Apple of Discord myth. With poor Altair who has to give away the Apple. Al Muliam, Robert de Sable, and Desmond being the “goddesses” (granted, the “fairest” choice is plain here)

All I’m hearing is “sugar daddy Ezio” to go along with the “sugar daddy Haytham”. Granted, the attitude would be vastly different

Have you ever considered - Desmond survives and gets to be(mentally) transported in time to some Isu temple. Except the eye doesn't have human genome templates, only Isu (thanks, Juno). New body is made wholly based on the Isu part of Desmond's genome. How hard would it be for Desmond to hide in plain sight, being at least a head taller than anyone around him?

Oh god. I read this and the brain immediately went "HEY LISTEN" so have this longass answer hahaha. Off the top of my head, I can think of three main ideas that incorporate this plot.

1 Desmond gets traveled back in time in an Isu body during the rise of the Isu civilization (or maybe even before the time 'everyone is scrambling to try not die from the sun, the prequel')

In this setup, I think Desmond's main problem would be trying to pretend that he's an actual Isu so that the other Isus won't think he's some kind of experiment gone rogue. He'll also be alone without any allies (Desmond would even be suspicious of Minerva because of how she acted in the Grand Temple and he only heard Tinia once so he doesn't know who Tinia is as a person). In this kind of plot, I think it would be fun for Desmond to be in the following scenarios:

Desmond accidentally helps Eve revolt and help the humans (... what if he was Adam??? Nah, it won't work. For one, Adam is a human and this plot gives Desmond an Isu body). Oh, oh, oh. What if Desmond (as an Isu) is the one to give Eve the Apple of Eden and this gets translated as him as the snake/devil giving Eve the apple hahahaha

Have some kind of tense alliance with Aletheia in her time as the Dikastes of Atlantis (maybe his body is one of Juno and Aita's secret pet projects)

Get in the middle of a war between the Asgardian Isus and the other Isus. Just imagine him awkwardly trying not to listen to Minerva and Odin having sex when all he wanted to do was check if there's any Isu bs that can help him in this supposed vault or whatever, why are they even having sex here, come on! Then Odin catches sight of him when he's trying to find the mead, maybe Desmond grabs the mead before he does because it's glowing hella gold in his Eagle Vision and Desmond sees shiny and thinks 'shiny? important? shiny!' and now Odin is chasing him all over the nine realms while Desmond just wants to find a way back to his goddamn time

2 Desmond gets traveled back in time in an Isu body before the 21st century

Alright, this spans all the (main) games' non-modern day plot but here's some of the key points I can think of:

In general, religious people might see him as either a god or a divine being sent by god (since Isu tend to wear glowing outfits). His height might even count him as a nephilim instead as they're usually described as giants with great power. This would get him in trouble or might get him out of trouble if he can, you know, pretend to act godly and stuff (it's Desmond though so my bet is awkward 'fear not for thou, uh, hast, uuuhhh...'). The idea that he's god would most definitely be the case for the three mcs of the Layla Trilogy and maybe even Ezio (but, let's be honest, Ezio is a special case).

Honestly, I think he has the best chance of hiding and figuring shit out with Bayek because Bayek would see him and go 'oh, he's in trouble. as a medjay and a good person, I will help him.' while the misthios (Kassandra or Alexios) would be like "A god! Or a demi-god! Must be one of Zeus' children, poor boy. Come! Join my crew and let's fuck shit up!" and Eivor would be more of "You must be a Jotun... Our clan is open to all! Even a Jotun like you. How do you feel about burning churches?"

Kicking him to the time of the Third Crusades will be hilarious. On one hand, the Templars definitely want him because holy shit (and I can just imagine Maria actually pledging to be his knight because she absolutely believes that Desmond is a divine being, if not her god then one of his divine messengers), the Assassins want him because also holy shit (and it would be funny if one of those who truly believe Desmond is some kind of god is Abbas, just the awkwardness and blatant hostility turning to confusion and mild annoyance in the same vein of 'please stop talking, abbas' 'of course, my lord' will be priceless) and the people who are left being 'sus, absolutely sus' are probably going to be Altaïr (who is an atheist in canon) and Malik (who saw the power of the POE in canon and went 'yeah, sounds like tech we don't understand yet') so they have this awkward possibly powerful being trying to hide behind the two of them because Desmond saw them not looking at him with any reverence and went 'yes, these two. These two will protect me while I have my silent freakout' but that only makes everyone believe that Altaïr and Malik have been chosen by 'god' and now Malik, being the more 'cordial' of the two (and the last time Altaïr spoke for them, he sounded so arrogant and full of himself (this is set before the start of AC1) that they could see the metaphorical pitchforks getting ready) have to speak for Desmond because it's clear that Desmond has no idea what to do and is freaking out but pretending not to be. This, in turn, makes Malik the unofficial spokesperson (prophet) of Desmond while Altaïr gets called his knight when all he's trying to do is keep Desmond from running away and building a fucking grape farm of all things (Desmond wasn't serious, he was rambling, but Altaïr didn't know that). Kadar (hell yeah, he lives) gets roped in as well and he actually believes all this Desmond-is-god crap so now Desmond has a very enthusiastic 'butler/acolyte' on top of everything.

Renaissance period depends on when Desmond gets kicked out of his timeline. If he gets kicked out before Ezio heard Minerva's message, Ezio would probably look at him with suspicion and maybe even be a bit hostile with him considering he's still hurting and wishing for revenge. If it was after Minerva's message (Brotherhood), Ezio would definitely help him, maybe try to learn from him, and may even think of him as an actual divine being because of his religious background which makes Desmond feel awkward and creates some kind of wall between the two of them. Desmond just wants to help Ezio and be treated normally (or as equals) but Ezio can't help but see Desmond as some kind of god or angel that has been sent to help them in exchange for his loyalty and servitude. (Insert angst here with bonus points for religious themes and imagery that will send my soul deeper to hell) Revelations-timeline Ezio already has enough and wants out. He would see Desmond as someone in a similar position as him and they'll have a peaceful life tending a countryside farm with Sofia and their children because THESE TWO DESERVE PEACE.

I think Haytham and the other characters during Rogue would look at Desmond and think 'holy shit, Isu' and try to capture him. Both Templars and Assassins want to capture him because he's some stranger who may or may not be an Isu and that means knowledge and power that the other organization should not have. The Templars would definitely send Shay (if this is after Lisbon) while the Assassins would send Liam or maybe Adéwalé or Kesegowaase. Desmond is sus of both of them because Templars are Templars in his eyes and he saw how Hope's Assassins are pretty much governing the criminal underworld of New York which is pretty bad, all things considered, so he's iffy about going to the Assassins. So who does he turn to? Ziio. Ziio with baby Ratonhnhaké:ton and fuck whatever is happening to him and what this means in the timeline, he's gonna hide in Ziio's village forever and be Ratonhnhaké:ton's favorite uncle. You don't have to hide in plain sight if you're staying in a village that thinks you're some kind of spirit or something and that's cool. So while the Assassins and Templars are scrambling to find him, he's just chilling and babysitting for Ziio. By the time they find him in Ziio's village, Ratonhnhaké:ton is old enough to think Desmond is his dad (but he's BFF with Ziio, not in a romantic relationship) so Haytham has to deal with a bad breakup, a son he didn't even know existed and a powerful being who may or may not have adopted his son.

Desmond would have a stressful time in the Carribeans, dodging pirates and everybody else. And he can't find any Assassins for some reason so he tries to take a breather by chilling on some uninhabited island. Cue Captain Edward Kenway who was just there because it was on some weird old map he found and he sees his big dude and thought "sure, let's make him part of our crew" while Desmond agrees because he has a hidden blade so he might be an Assassin (he's not) and his name is Kenway so he might be Ratonhnhaké:ton's grandpa (he is) and Desmond needs a break. Chilling with pirates sounds like fun (it's not)

I think Desmond would spend most of his time during the French Revolution trying to find a way to America because that's where Ratonhnhaké:ton is and he believes Ratonhnhaké:ton will believe him (at the very least, won't turn him away anyway) but he'll get roped into this because something inside him is telling him there's someone in Paris that is bad juju. His Isu body is reacting to Aita's Sage and it's giving him some kind of annoying headache. Before he knows what's happening, he's secretly helping an Assassin who reminds him of Ezio and forms some kind of alliance with him. He has no knowledge of the French Revolution other than the Liam Neeson movie (not the musical because, according to wiki, that released on Dec 25 2012 in the US and our boy is already dead by then) so good luck?

Victorian England, on the other hand, would have Desmond barging in on the train that the Frye twins commandeered because 'it's a train... if you wanted to be inconspicuous, you'd pick the sewers, not a train'. His height would leave him... well, pretty much benched unless it's nighttime and he stays on the roofs so he gets to help Greenie with research (and miss Shaun) and maybe awkward shuffle away when Evie and Henry start having a moment. He does help out during nighttime missions AND BECOMES ONE OF CHARLES DICKIN'S GHOST CLUB MISSION because people saw him and think 'holy shit, ghost!' and now Evie and Jacob have to pretend not to know that the ghost Charles Dickins wants them to find/debunk is actually some chill dude who likes going out at night to stretch his legs. (Jacob brings Desmond the dog to the train and introduces him to Desmond, Desmond is not amused, Jacob thinks it's the best joke he's made in a while, Desmond the dog thinks Desmond the Isu gives the best belly rubs)

3 Desmond gets traveled back in time in an Isu body during the 21st century (or farther than that)

For this one, I can think of two main plotlines

This one is connected to my previous idea of Elijah overriding Juno's new body and transferring Desmond's data into it. Cue awkward father-son bonding between the two as they try to escape Juno's lackeys with Charlotte and the other Assassins and Desmond is awkward around them because he doesn't know anyone (he's been isolated to the other Assassins since he got his own 'cell') and Elijah doesn't trust anyone at all. Their main problem now is trying to contact any of the other Assassins to help them escape while trying to escape from both Juno's lackeys and Abstergo who has now heard of Desmond's 'resurrection'.

This other plotline is kinda meh but you can throw Desmond farther into the future and have him get a more stable Abstergo-created Isu body during the timeline of Watch_Dog Legion. While the developers insist that Darcy (who is a descendant of the Fryes) isn't canon, fuck canon, have Desmond deal with the horrors of a dystopian future where his height will be a fucking red flag. He's stuck in London, allies himself with Darcy and Dedsec in a 'you scratch my back, i scratch yours' setup where he helps them out and they help him try and contact an Assassin he actually knows (like maybe Shaun or Rebecca).

In both of these plotlines, Desmond can easily blend in by using one thing: wheelchairs. While he's overall larger than normal humans, wheelchairs will make that less 'visible'... heightwise anyway

....... I just realize that I made plots instead of answering how Desmond could hide while using an Isu body... ooops?

[reddeaddamnation]

Assassin’s creed Masterlist or The Bible of our amazing Holy Trinity

Preferences:

When they find out your ex is beating you

When they find your sex toys 

Playing horror games with them

When you and your ex have to go on a mission without them

Teasing them during a dinner with friends and leaving them hanging

What nickname would be their favorite to call you

Being Finnish and dating them

How they are in bed vs. How they are outside it

Trying on lingerie and them walking in on you

How they react to your child saying they want a sibling

Messing up with them and asking them for forgiveness

How training with them is like

How they are like when they make you cry

How they are like when they are jealous

When you bring home a stray animal

What their favorite poses would be during sex

Being a rebel and them falling in love with you

How they are when they catch a cold

How they are when they sleep

Waking up beside them

Having a pet cat that doesn’t like your assassin boyfriend

How they would react to you being arachnophobic

How they would react to you suggesting to peg them

How training with them is like

Being Slavic and meeting them

Being Romani and meeting them

When they ask you about your scars

How they would react when you tell them you are pregnant

When they are possessive of you

When you give him a boner while sitting on his lap

What color lingerie he would like you wearing

Giving them a handjob at the cinema

When you interview them for a job

When you and your ex have to go on a mission without him

How they would react to you getting a kiss from someone else

How they would treat you if you were anorexic

Them singing you a song

Having a big guard dog that doesn’t like your assassin boyfriend

How they would deal with you after you drank too much

Playing seven minutes in heaven with them

When they tease you so much you lose your mood

Them losing you while you’re giving birth to your child

Being Egyptian and dating them

How they would make things right after messing up with you

Them taking you camping

How they would react to finding out you’re crossdressing

How they would celebrate your birthday

How they react to you telling them you don’t want children

When you say you want to go shopping

How they are during an argument

Being in a relationship with them

“I could get it, just don’t ask how“

Who their favorite 80s musicians would be

How they react to your teasing [Jacob and Arno]

Giving them a massage

When they sing you a song

Dirty A-Z headcanons:

Desmond Miles

Haytham Kenway

Ezio Auditore da Firenze

Elise de la Serre

Arno Dorian

Connor Kenway

Jacob Frye

Shay Cormac

Altair ibn-la’Ahad

Shaun Hastings

Henry Green

Daniel Cross

Clay Kaczmarek

Evie Frye

Yusuf Tazim

Edward Kenway

Our Holy Trinity preferences

Family dinner

Being gone for a long time and catching them jack off when you return home

Riding them on the Animus

Them having the bleeding effect but you staying with them

Them interviewing you for a job

Imagines

Imagine a highschool where:

The assassins as cats

The assassins living together

The assassins going hiking together

The assassins going together to the beach

Clay, Desmond and Daniel as little animals

Imagine them having a water balloon fight

Going with them to the zoo

Bayek of Siwa

Watching Bayek fight in the arena

Being a Roman aristocrat and Bayek saving you from getting assassinated

Car sex with Bayek of Siwa

Altair ibn-la’Ahad

“I’ll be there“

“Dooset daram“

“Brother“

Altair and Malik fighting over you

Malik al Sayf

Being there for Malik when he loses his arm

Ezio Auditore da Firenze

“Rebirthing“

“Che vuola questa musica?“

Ezio being jealous that you talk to Salai

“Perfect“

Being Leonardo da Vinci’s student and meeting Ezio

“The girl from the neighborhood“

Connor Kenway / Ratonhnhaké:ton

Being a Templar and Connor saving you from getting killed

Being a captive of the English and Connor freeing you

Being a Templar and running away with Connor after he saves you

Connor taking you with him on a hunt

Being a Templar and Connor falling in love with you

Haytham Kenway

Haytham being your sugar daddy [part one]

Haytham being your sugar daddy [part two]

“Perfect“

Edward Kenway

Edward saving you from getting killed

“Havana“

Being born on a ship and being afraid of land

Edward being impressed with your pirating skills

Shay Cormac

Being a Portuguese Templar and Shay falling in love with you

Arno Dorian

Being engaged to Pierre Bellec but having an affair with Arno Dorian

“Never enough“

Being agoraphobic and Arno comforting you

“Turning page“

Arno Dorian having a crush on you

Dating Arno Dorian

Arno Dorian saving you from the guillotine

Being a Templar and being in love with Arno

Being Arno’s lover

Pierre Bellec

Imagine convincing Pierre to adopt little Arno

Jacob Frye

Jacob pulling up a tent in front of your house because he wants you to notice him

Being forcefully married to Starrick and helping Jacob bring him down

Being forcefully married to Starrick and having an affair with Jacob

Being married to Jacob Frye

Getting married to Jacob

Being Starrick’s daughter and dating Jacob

Being a gang leader and catching Jacob’s attention

Having an argument with Jacob

Evie Frye

Meeting Evie for the first time and falling in love with her

Desmond Miles

“Closer“

If happy ever after did exist

Clay Kaczmarek

Clay talking dirty to you in Polish

“Whispers in the dark“