#irl conversation

[kriosv]

A saying from one of my old playerighting classes.

Whenever he was saying farewell to someone, like they were moving away and likely wouldn't meet again, he'd say

"I hope you're life is too borig to give me inspiration for a play."

[nonna-thefolkgremlin]

me: “i want to run away from my life. do you want to run from yours?”

my friend: “no…i don’t think so.”

me: “…can i ask why?”

my friend: “because i wouldn’t be able to talk to you, or hang out with you. what if i hadn’t even met you if i ran when i wanted to?”

me: “that’s a good point.”

*silence*

me: (sighs) “i don’t think i would run away from my life because you’re in it. i just…”

my friend: (smiles) “…hypothetically.”

me: “theoretically.”

my friend: “just wondering…” *starts laughing*

me: *giggling* “we’re going to be okay, i think.”

[overusedfandom666]

Yes, yes, tell me more about the lore of your deranged story you made with your friends, PinkPiePepper. Let me read it off a document so I can properly write a fanfic

[velvetcloak]

Friend: So I bought a young adult book a few days ago, and I don't quite like it.

Me: Okay. Why?

Friend: There's too much dialogue. I come from the nonfiction and memoir genres, so I'm not really used to it. The use of apostrophes and commas in dialogue confuses me. Like, I keep forgetting who said what. If only there were clearer instructions or names on who said what.

Me: Girl, that's a script!

[gremlinanalyst]

me: *casually projects onto a character i’m writing about*.

my beta reader: (horrified) “so…do i even need to ask? what the fuck happened to you?”

me: (singsong) “it’s the ✨childhood trauma✨ reflection hours-“

my beta reader: “i high-key will kill a bitch. you just give me the word and i’ll do it.”

[themysterykat]

My friend: do you need anything?

Me: a lobotomy.

My friend: I meant in regards to food!

Me: ask vague questions, get unhinged answers...

[luckywolfsbane]

Me: This cornbread is special. My grandpa made it from his mom's recipe, so you're at least the 5th generation to eat this cornbread.

My 3-year-old niece: WHOOOOAA

Me: Could go back even further.

My neice: WHOOOOAAAAA

[dad-cahoon]

"the chipmunks on my dresser are holding a revolution, their tiny arrows get stuck in my feet

there, I wrote a tumblr post

are you gonna let me have tumblr now?"

- ladies, gentlemen, and everyone else,

✨️my mother✨️

[no-strana]

“Abbiamo la birra, abbiamo le patatine, abbiamo la prima puntata della nuova stagione di Picard... chi ci ammazza?”

“Il nucleare!”

“O il Covid!”

“O tutte le altre cause di morte classiche, che comunque ci sono ancora!”

“YEEEEEEHHHHHH”

[kriosv]

Me(at work): I'm gonna play some music. Any requests?

Coworker: how about oldies?

Me: ah, turns out i don't have my 60s playlist available offline. For decades, i have 00s-

Coworker: Yeah, oldies, thats what i meant.

Me:...

Coworker:...

Me: You are 1 year younger than me.

[just-messing-around]

Me: I'll try to come over tomorrow to play swords with Teddy in the yard.

My sister: Just don't get on the trampoline 😂

Me: *Still can't completely straighten my arm and can't even feel my elbow because my nerves aren't done recovering from the surgery and might not recover for a whole year*

Me: Haha, definitely not, never again 😂

Me on the inside: I hate trampolines

I don't exactly hate them, I just hate the idea of being on them now.

[nootcatt]

Me: Mom, Dad. I'm depressed.

Mom: No honey, you can't be. It's the quarantine. Everyone is feeling that way.

Dad: I work too damn hard for you all. I will not hear a single word about you being any kind of ill.

[ghst-jpg]

me: where do i go if i want to cry?

sky: my bed

me: that's... that's actually a pretty okay pick up line

sky: i didn't mean it like that

[gremlinanalyst]

me: (waltzing into my room) “welcome to my chaos zone.”

my beta reader: (concerned) “why do you have so many notebooks-“

me: (stares intensely into the corner of my room like i’m Deadpool) “now, friends, an analyst never reveals their secrets unless they’ve been tortured by the government.”

my beta reader: “this is why you don’t have many friends.”

[droidicarex]

What was your last lengthy irl conversation about?

Mine was a 1.5-2 hour conversation about English Royalty from Richard III to now...

[lowsodiumlevels]

Dad: do any of the kids at your school wear body armor?

Me: wh- I- no I don't think so.