#iona is also such a shit about it herself

[invinciblerodent]

and! and! and!!!!! once they get actually comfortable enough to accept this new and exciting trait of themselves that they didn't even know about, they revel in it, even if they continue to play at reluctance.

"oh, alright, if you must~" (their arms are already spread wide, ready to Receive the Hug, smile playing on their lips)

"my, you really are just obsessed with me, aren't you~" when asked for a kiss (it comes with a playful poke to their partner's belly) (and no acknowledgement of the fact that they too are a little bit obsessed with them ofc)

"hm, and what have you done to deserve it, I wonder~?" as they are actively leaning in for a kiss already (you've been yourself, that's what you've done. But that part is unspoken.) (also, whispered against the other's lips with their shared breath? hot)

"😒" "what." "😒" "what's wrong." "😒😒" (what's wrong is that their partner is not reading their mind. they should be kissing them, not doing whatever other unimportant nonsense they're doing.) (oh, saving the world? that can wait. kissies, however, can't.)

and still insisting that they're not some cuddlebug. yes, while actively holding their partner. oh, this? this means nothing. this is a coincidence. my arms snug around them, that's a trick of the light. you're seeing nothing. (they're also smiling, and making no effort to hide it.)

going slightly feral today for characters who don't think of themselves as being "~into~" touch and physical intimacy suddenly discovering that they actually are, in like an embarrassingly huge way

"oh fine, I'll indulge you, but I'll have you know that I'm not exactly cuddly, darling. 🙄" (proceeds to wrap themselves around their partner in their sleep like a boa constrictor) (yes this becomes a regular occurrence)

"no dear, I don't like hugs" (does, in fact, melt into each embrace with a soft sigh and eyes sliding shut, all gooey inside like a person-shaped fudge brownie)

"how juvenile. I'm not ticklish, I'm not a child. 😒" (starts convulsing with stifled laughter if their partner as much as wiggles their fingers in their general direction) (no they are very cool I promise)

"don't touch me 😒" (secretly pouts when their explicit wish is respected. no wait come back i didn't mean don't as in don't, i meant it as try harder. yes i know that's counterintuitive. no you should read my mind exactly. how is that even hard--)

"*makes a longing 🥺 face every time their partner is doing something just out of their reach, wanting to touch them but not wanting to come off as ~needy~*" (scoffs and turns away when asked if they want a hug) ((that means "yes please"))

"ugh, fine, but if you ruin my hair--" (all but tears up at having their scalp gently scratched. finds that they do not give a solitary shit about their hair now, actually.) (yes, they will now regularly plop their head in their partner's lap as a silent request for scritches. they're not cuddly, though.)

will not hold hands. will, however, knock shoulders while walking. (it means try again. it means please never stop trying.)

[ravenadottir]

s3 boat party cast as s2 islanders

(i did a tai/camilo route and i thought it was really underwhelming. i know the characters switch once you switch the main LI but most of these stay the same.)

this is about their personalities throughout the boat party.

elladine = hope. organized the party but still keeps an eye on her friends. as she described it herself, she's the mom friend, and she woke us up to see a meteor shower so... yeah.

nicky = bobby. he's not having anyone's shit this season, despite letting his partner get away with some bullshit sometimes. overall chill but not really. playful but not a lot.

iona = marisol. flirty and competitive. plus, she tries to force the truth out of yasmin and it's kind of over analyzing her.

yasmin = rahim. doesn't open up until the very end and gets very annoyed at maris-, sorry, iona, when she doesn't drop it.

ciaran = henrik. there's a dog and he's having the time of his life as the true puppy he is.

aj = hannah. she's perky and bright eyed about everything in this trip. also, lesbian.

genevieve = noah. too afraid of the answer to ask the question.

miki = lottie. calling people out. also, finding it hard to disconnect her phone because this way she's not getting anyone's validation.

seb = gary. doesn't like the fame, hates small talk and would never leave his hometown unless is for the love of his life.

bill = rocco. he doesn't feel the pressure of fame and continues in his simple ways. bill is building a house and posting on social media instead of branching out and i love that for him. you don't need more to be happy so you do you.

rafi, lily, tai, camilo, harry. well, they're there. and um... they talk and stuff, it's fine.

[flyingpochama948]

Okay but like, it’s going to sound weird to a lot of people, but to me SonElise was the first shipping with Sonic and a girl (at least with a canon interest anyway) that I actually liked.

I only remember a few before.  Those were Son///Amy, Son///ally, and Son///Mina, and for a brief while Son///Fiona (Son////iona??? fuck idk).  The way they were presented to me were less than favorable.  Son///Amy because Sonic really didn't seem interested in her and her advances could get down right violent at times, like in Sonic X.  She was also badly portrayed in Sonic Battle, utilizing self harming exercise to get Sonic’s attention.  That’s...pretty awful.  I know they tried to play it off as comedic but I found it disturbing quite frankly.   And the fandom I had to deal with pretty much sealed in place that I will never like this pairing.  Again, I love Amy.  It’s just they’ve not done a good job at representing her in a good light at times when it comes to Sonic.

Then there was Son///ally.  Which was out of the question from the get go cause for the longest time I loathed Sally.  I don’t anymore but I’m sure it’s clear to everyone that they painted her and Sonic’s relationship in a terrible light.  Use the slap scene in 134 for example.  Plus they made Sonic act horribly OOC regarding her and other girls.

Then there’s Mina.  Poor girl...  I really tried to make this one my ship for Sonic.  But really, Sonic treated her like shit.  Not on purpose or anything.  Then she had to critically injure herself to protect Sonic’s actual love interest, Sally.  And she only did it because she liked Sonic.  Not really because she cared about Sally.  So yeah, it’s pretty toxic.  I’m happy she moved on with a new guy and yet again, they make Sonic OOC and be jealous of this new dude for some reason.  Even though he refused Mina himself.

Don’t even need to go into detail of why Sonic and Fiona make a horrible couple and a lot of people would be in agreement on this.  This only happened in a cheap attempt to cause a rift in Sonic and Tails’ relationship.  Not to mention she turned on him at the drop of a hat for the overrated green Sonic copy.  Fiona’s just...an all around horrible character and horrible person.

I could give an honorable mention to Bunnie but...was that even relevant?  I think it was somehow to stick it to Sally and Antoine for whatever reason.  Was it because the wedding?  Fuck, i don’t even remember and that wasn’t even Antoine in the wedding.  The shit Archie came up with was just that.

I figured there would never be a Sonic x Female character ship presented in any canon that I would ever like.  All I really liked at the time was Sonaze just because.  But they were presented as friends which is why they’re kinda left off the topic.

But then I watched Sonic 06 cutscenes, around six years after the game came out.  I already heard plenty of horror stories about Elise.  That she was undoubtedly the “worst Sonic love interest”.  I wasn’t expecting much going into it.  Just another terrible Sonic love story.  I was more interested in just the story in general cause I never played the game and still wasn’t able to at the time of the viewing.

And I watched it and...actually...what I saw was in my opinion was the best representation of how Sonic should act if a girl likes him.  And Elise wasn’t forceful or dramatic with him either.  She was almost like Sonic himself.  Just shy and awkward.  I was shocked.  Their moments together actually touched my heart.  Nobody felt OOC in the least.  Is it absolutely perfect?  No, of course not.  But from everything else I saw with past love interests, this one by far was the most palatable.

Honestly, I think it would have been considered one of the best Sonic ships if not for one thing.  Elise is a hyper realistic human and she looks awkward against a cartoon hedgehog.  Sure people can go on about her not having a personality and that it wouldn’t matter anyway.  Which is true.  But there’s still a lot of people who would change their tune if she was Mobian.  I don’t feel this needs to happen at all, as I said countless times before.  I think she’s fine the way she is.

Which is why SonElise will always be my most favorite ship for Sonic of all time.  People warned me about it being horrible but it turned out to be one of the more genuine and non-toxic relationships for Sonic.  Disagree with me all you like but these are my genuine feelings.

[datorchoe]

Housecarl Headcanons

Agris the Bulwark

- Agris is a fucking daddy I’d die for him

- Agris lost his eye when he was ten to a wolf attack. He was hunting with his father and moved too slow. He also hurt the arm on the same side, making it go numb sometimes. 

- The nickname “Bulwark” comes from a pet name from his mom. 

Calder

- Poor Calder does not give two shits about the Civil War. Ulfric pulls him aside like “hey noticed any Imperials?” and Calders like “o_o” 

- Do not, and I repeat, DO NOT TOUCH HIS SIDEBURNS WITHOUT PERMISSION! DO YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TAKES TO GET THEM TO LOOK THAT GOOD?! 

Gregor

- Gregor supports Ulfric because of the Jarl’s support for him. 

- Gregor has that crazy uncle personality, so if your looking for some life advice, he’d probably not be a good candidate. Well, unless that’s what your looking for. 

Iona

- Iona and Mjoll are actually pretty good friends, having similar personality’s. However, while Mjoll is supportive of Laila Law-Giver, Iona doesn’t really care for her. 

- Iona kinda likes Maven, only because she gets things done. Other than that she thinks she’s a bitch. 

- Her favorite color is red. 

Jordis the Sword-Maiden

- Jordis is 100% a mom friend. Every time you get into trouble she just goes “I’m not mad, just disappointed” 

- Jordis is incredibly tender-headed. If you pull her hair your gonna die, but if you scratch her head, she’ll melt into it. 

- Her mom was the one who taught her to use her sword. 

Lydia

- Lydia doesn’t really like mages. It’s not like a bias thing, she just thinks their a little...too unpredictable.

- She and Irileth are sparring partners. They also enjoy harassing Farengar.  

- Balgruuf has been her major father figure, taking care of her since she was young. 

Rayya

- Rayya grew up in Sentinel with her father who was a blacksmith. She learned the art of the blade by herself. 

- She made her Scimitar.  

Valdimar

- Valdimar is absolutely terrified of Jarl Igrod but he likes Alsfur.

- He used to be a mage at the College of Winterhold. 

[cloveroctobers]

YASMIN DOUGLAS—

IG info/Bio: @/imyasmin_d | 11.6k followers | hello & ahlan 🎶

23-24 years old depending on her birthday (I’m thinking too much about timelines since i know some shows aren’t live and if they filmed it prior & it’s just being shown to us now...then there’s the boat party that comes in after, you get what I’m saying right? No? Okay)

Moroccan heritage

she was born in fes along with her baba

Father works in the carpet & rug manufacturing industry and worked in his father’s business from the young age of 16

her mother is from Essaouira & has often stated that she couldn’t stand Yasmin’s father the first time they met but she wouldn’t want to travel through this life with anyone else

Her father and mother came from two different lifestyles. All he knew how to do was hard work yet he had a sarcastic but playful side to him whereas her mom came from a family that was more financially stable & she was free to do whatever! mainly hanging at the beach with her friends without a care in the world, she was privileged and a little uppity while her father’s life seemed to be planned out from the day of his birth

Yet they still fell in love and decided to leave Morocco months after they got married at 21 & 24 & not too long after they had yas they left for England

She was raised in Kent, England

The Atmosphere led to her boho lifestyle...being exposed to castles, gardens, and underground tunnels from time to time shaped her into what she felt she was meant to be. She loved her second home

they call her “yazzy”

Parents follow islam...Which Yasmin respects but is not strongly devoted to

Can speak & write in Arabic but seems to do better in writing

Her paternal grandparents fault her parents for not teaching her to excel at both & feel that if they weren’t in such a rush to leave home she would speak Arabic better

Which made Yasmin feel like shit. Her paternal grandparents were strict on keeping their customs alive whereas her maternal grandparents were carefree as long as they got to see their granddaughter alive & well that was good enough for them

Idk maybe a only child or has a older brother? I don’t feel like she comes from a big family sibling wise

her mother made her a stuffed purple sheep that she took everywhere with her as a kid & continues to keep close to her. Y’all had imaginary friends? Well Yasmin had a real friend she could see & squeeze the life out that didn’t require talking and hugging the air, but that’s fine do u

100% collects beanie babies until this day but lil yamb is the number one princess in her household

As her significant other you have to be okay with lil yamb sleeping in between y’all that’s just the way it is

These stuffed babies are her comfort when no else can be

she’s a singer/songwriter. Went to uni for it & finished a semester early

Went through multiple hell experiences when it came to interning & temping while still in school & after

Let’s just say she wasn’t down to f*ck her way to the top

this made her anxiety act up, these people made her feel like she wouldn’t be good enough to show the world her craft & it’s didn’t have to be the world, just someone who would listen

But she couldn’t give up, there was nothing else she saw herself doing. She knew this is what she was meant to do but she couldn’t lie and say that her insecurities didn’t get the best of her most days

Although the cons seemed to out way the Pros some days, she kept at it & found herself a solid team that knew what she was about and understood her soul

Was definitely the student who loved all her English classes & when she spoke up everyone found it shocking since she preferred to just write everything out rather than “participate in group discussions”

I feel like her singing voice sounds similar to Jessica mauboy’s (if you don’t know who that is & you’re a fan of r&b/pop check her out or if you’re just curious that works too lol)

Knows her music notes like the back of her hand, duh!

Fav color is royal blue, especially on her eyelids & nails

Occasionally sleeps in rollers to keep her hair wavy

Needs her space when it comes to disagreements, they stress her out & she panics a bit when things go wrong so she feels like she needs to leave the situation rather than talk it out right then and there

She’ll talk when she’s ready, she just needs someone that’s a little patient with her that’s all

Words of affirmation is her love language? When she figures out how to balance her love life with her work life that is. When she’s feeling confident she’s smooth with words but when she needs to show you how much you mean to her & she really takes the time to think it out & feel her emotions, she’s writing you a song or you’re the inspiration to it or a poem, leaving you little love notes on blue post-it’s around the house, will write 50 reasons why she loves you on Valentine’s Day, and will say so when it’s just the two of you in your own comfort

Isn’t too crazy about public displays of affection but will deff hold your hand if that’s something you or she wanted in that moment

I think she’s fluid

Hasn’t been in many relationships. Sure she goes on tour every other year and gets to meet many people but they’re not solid relationships, they’re hookups and she hasn’t done many of those either

Had maybe one or two solid relationships: a androgynous woman that uses she/they pronouns & was in a rock band & a cis male she met at a tattoo parlor his step-brother owned (he kinda favored seb but we’re not going to speak on that)

I believe she wants to get married someday but isn’t so keen on the idea of kids. The furthest she’ll go is adopting a couple of animals. She’ll be a pet mom! I feel like she’ll be anxious looking after the life of a human being when it’s extremely hard to do so not only for herself and the love of her life & you want to add kids to the mix?! Fucking hell! but that could change? Who knows what life can throw at u

Has a hedgehog named Sonia that she drops off at her parents for their weekly sleepovers

Loves lace—mostly bralettes & crotchet clothing

I see her as a corduroy girl too. She has at least some rusty brown low-rise corduroy pants or/and a jacket

owns a crotchet kit, she’s bloody good at it too

Loved pink & purple (still likes them, they’re her 2nd & 3rd fav colors) so much as a kid that she tried to dye her hair half & half while her parents went out on their date night...it was also the weekend before school pictures :)

Says she got her inspiration from starfire & raven. She was only 13 at the time & had braces. Her father approved saying she’s a kid and she should be allowed to express herself. He only said that because his own parents barely let him & his brothers have their own fun

Her mother thought it was atrocious and did her best to get it out with the help of her other hair stylists friends (her mother worked in plenty of beauty shops once she got to England, until she decided to convert their basement into her own shop) who she invited over to see what her daughter had done but when you use certain permanent dyes...

It didn’t completely damage yasmin’s hair plus it was just hair, Yasmin didn’t see the big deal. She thought she looked splendid

Anyway, massive fan of ballroom dancing

She’s got a great ear to begin with so it was extremely fun twirling around while wearing pretty ballroom gowns

Took boring etiquette classes as a form of punishment? After the whole teen Titans inspiration thing “went wrong”

Enjoys western films

yes she owns a cowgirl hat & some boots too so sue her, she likes what she likes

Knows how to lasso but hates doing it to animals but she’ll do it to you :) (*gags* lmao why???)

Also loves visiting western towns & learning some history or at least experiencing what it was like

Type of significant other that will do her best to persuade you to stay in a treehouse airbnb, a cabin, the fucking Idaho potato, or camping out in her Volkswagen van in the middle of nowhere!

Has faux cow rugs, wicker baskets, wicker chairs in her flat, hangs some plants in glass jars & bottles all over her house

Her flat is very bright & vibrant: white, mocha brown, tan, yellows, & pastel purple

When it comes to decision making, she’ll make them pretty quick but only if it comes to choosing desserts

nobody is touching her mom’s meskouta orange cake WITH syrup

the dessert eater that always picks the one that has a surprise inside, meaning it has to ooze out with SOMETHING to make it 10x more satisfying

Leaning towards Buddhism, had studied some of their beliefs and found it resonates with her spirit

Fan of neon lights, probably has a few neon signs in her flat preferably on her brick wall in the loo, “to give u comfort as you go!” “that...actually makes sense.” Tai commented as he rubbed his chin coming to terms with yasmin’s reply. While Iona scowls, “no, no it doesn’t. I feel as if it’s an invasion of my bits!” “...Sorry you feel that way.”

tai & ciaran are automatically deemed as her brothers since she came into the villa with them. She had time to connect with them unlike anyone else. It was just the way the stars wrote their story and it showed outside of the villa too. they often crash at her place all the time when they’re in town & vacation all the time together when their schedules line up + it never feels like she’s third wheeling

“TaiTower” & “BB-Ci” are their names in her phone, Tai picked his own name while the “bb” stands for “best buds” for ciaran —which is a joke since he drunkly called himself so + he loves everyone when he’s drunk

You can always count on her to belt the lyrics to a Chaka Khan, TLC, or paula abdul joint when she’s drunk lol

As for the girls? She’s close with miki 😒 they just seem to be on the same wavelength when it comes to the pressure of the media since they have some sort of fame which increased with them being on the Telly. They bond over that & from there they’ve built a solid friendship

She could also be friends with AJ too (if you didn’t get swiped from her that is lmao!) they’re sorta opposites with aj being high energy/active while Yasmin is more mellow & “mysterious” but seem to connect in different ways: their sexual indentities, insecurities/anxieties, having something to be passionate about but at the same time maybe not? She might lean towards elladine or Genevieve if she had to make a choice?

Aquarius sun + cancer moon

so she’s still 23 y’all, I got it! I can’t do math sorry

“Freddie Mercury was probably my dad in my past life.”

Can play the banjo, guitar, & oud

Participates in hot yoga weekly

If she’s not with mc in the end and continues dating around if anyone from season two: LUCAS, Kassam, Gary, Rocco, maybe Blake? I originally thought Elisa but she’s probably too much for yas let’s be honest here lol they’d be better off as friends

Omg I forgot marisol! Imagine that?! Whew!!!

Season three: maybe Lily? But what if? Me being the slightly messy bitch that I am? Something happening with her & AJ. Now that?! Would be some chaotic shit “from the outside looks of it” name the irrelevant person behind the quote...now!

I’d like to see her interact with allerga but there could be something with her & cherry. I’m thinking cherry, Yasmin, & priya would bond well but we’re not here to talk about that

Getting rid of the physical aspect I genuinely think she’d do well with marisol, Lucas, or kassam. They’d mesh well I think in a relationship

She’s a body shimmer girl for sure!

Loves silk or satin robes

she’s a shortie, 5’2 to 5’5

Is learning Spanish

Loves arcade games, come see her in pinball & Pac-Man!

Quarantine life did not change her lifestyle much, but it did slightly mess with her mental health :/

loves the fall time, feels like she can slow down some and really spend time with family and friends

I feel like she has one best friend outside of the villa & that’s good enough for her!

They met their first year in uni & been close ever since

She doesn’t speak to the temporary friends she grew up with anymore & is often confused why they feel the need to keep up with her in the media which added more annoying worries to her heart but whatever right? Keep your eyes on the horizon

celebs she finds/found attractive: Aaliyah—especially when she played in queen of the damned, Kehlani, Zazie Beetz, Fivel & Booboo Stewart, Lakeith stanfield, Leah Lewis, Sofia Carson, Ryan gosling, & Nick Jonas

She listens to: jade bird, Yebba, Elli Ingram, Wafia, Zeina, Summer walker, Tanerèlle, Mariah the scientist, Teyana Taylor, Tove Lo, lady Gaga, Ra Ra Riot, Empire of the sun, & smallpools

Anthem? Diana Gordon — Rollin’

[ryuutchi]

Dearest Yulegoat [Mirrored Yuletide Letter] 

[General]

To start with, if you're writing fic for me, I love you. I'm going to be happy just to be able to share my fandom love with someone. You'll notice I throw a lot of ideas out-- feel free to take one, take many, take none. I know how hard it can be to settle on an idea once the assignments come in. So I'm offering a bunch of options that I will enjoy. None of these suggestions are hard and fast requirements. They're here to give you an idea of what's going on in my head and what my preferences look like. My current blog is ryuutchi, over on Tumblr. I can't promise it will be helpful, but in the interest of helping with the stalking process, feel free to check me out over there. I like: Plot, adventures, banter and dry humor, happy endings, over the top AUs (steampunk, noir, organized crime, rum-runners, harems...), casual physical intimacy, emotional interdependency, bad decisions and poor coping mechanisms, hurt/comfort and whump-with-comfort, loyalty and morality confusion, worldbuilding, identity porn, questionable healthy attachments, seeking out physical affection, accidentally caught feelings,  power-play, porn, gen, slash, femslash, het, any rating you feel comfortable with (for violence and/or sex), bittersweet things that are heavy on the sweet, Happily Ever After/Happily For Now endings I don't like: Deathfic, gratuitous angst, character-bashing, introspective character pieces, five times fics, mommy/daddy kink, A/B/O universes, contemporary social issues as the main focus/issuefic, sad or hopeless endings. (Also the standard DNWs: scat, watersports, necro, mpreg, homophobia, transphobia, etc) No Game No Life - Kamiya Yuu: Sora, Shiro The Series: They are both NEETs and Hikikomoris… but on the internet, the genius gamer siblings Sora and Shiro are known as the undefeatable “__” (blank). Sora and Shiro’s talents and skills are so abnormally good they are considered as urban legend.  One day, they are challenged by the god of games to chess and are victorious. As a result, the god summons them to Disboard, a reality which revolves around games. Intent on maintaining their reputation as the undefeated gamers, Sora and Shiro plan to conquer the sixteen ruling species and to usurp the god of games... NGNL is a series of light novels, of which 6 have been translated (PDFs can be found here, or bought legally at any online bookstore). The No Game No Life anime can be found on Crunchyroll here. Request: The fact that Shiro and Sora literally cannot be separated from each other is one of the dynamics that I like about the series. I really enjoy codependent siblings as a Thing. So I would be happy if you played with that dynamic. Plotty gen for this series would be great-- it's always fun when one of them is much better than the other or they have to separate and execute plans while relying solely on the intuition of what their sibling will do. Alternately, someone kidnapping Sora and Shiro having to play a game to get him back while they both battle their inability to get anything done alone... I'd love background on them, where they tried to separate or were forced to separate and failed to function, or where one or the other tried to interact with other people (maybe a gamer who tracked them down) but were either terrible at it, the other one quietly sabotaged the budding relationship,  or the third person got way too freaked out by the way Sora and Shiro act around each other. Future fic would also be great-- King/Queen Blank or even the Gods Blank, after they've beaten Tet. What does that look like? What kind of world are they making for themselves and each other? I ship them, but do not expect other people to, so if you want to write shippy fic (with aged up Shiro!!!) for them, I will be surprised but happy. I will happily admit to wanting kinky sex games. Extra Details: For reference, I've read through volume 8 of the light novel, watched the anime and the movie. I am not precious about spoilers for this series, so feel free to use later information. I know this series isn't everyone's cup of tea, with the sheer amount of fanservice and Sora's utterly otaku personality and the pseudo-incest thing with the 12 year old. Personally, as is probably obvious from the request, I'm less interested in the fanservicey characters, and much more about the dynamics of Shiro and Sora's relationship. I love the way they know exactly what the other is capable of and trust each other completely and whole-heartedly. Whether you write something small and domestic or big and plotty, for me the core of NGNL is that they love, care and respect each other in a way that is beautiful but also extremely unhealthy. If you want to go the shippy route, again, Shiro needs to be aged up appropriately-- it's always been interesting to me that Sora understands that it is inappropriate to sexualize his underage adopted sister, while Shiro goes out of her way to help sexualize other women for Sora's entertainment. There's a part of me that wonders if she's planning ahead for when she is old enough to be an "appropriate" (in age, if nothing else) sexual partner and is trying to get Sora to lose his virginity ahead of time. selector infected WIXOSS: Aoi Akira, Igarashi Rumi | UlithThe Series: WIXOSS is a popular trading card game in which players battle against each other with fighters known as LRIGs, using cards to support them. Certain LRIGs are able to communicate with their owners, and the girls chosen to wield them are known as "Selectors". Selectors are given the chance to have any wish granted by winning battles against other Selectors, but should they lose three times, their wish will be reversed into a curse instead. The main series, selector infected WIXOSS, follows a girl named Ruko Kominato, who becomes a Selector after receiving an LRIG that she names Tama. As she and various other Selectors battle it out for the sake of their wish, Ruko finds herself drawn into the dark, sinister world of WIXOSS, discovering that, win or lose, there is always a price to pay. The anime can be found on Funimation here Request: So, you know how in my "general likes" I said I don't like "gratuitous angst"? In this fandom, there is no such thing as "gratuitous". Darkfic is absolutely welcome here. The thing I am most interested in here is the manipulative, awful relationship that Akira has with Ulith-as-Iona. Like, I love them all, and for some reason in this fandom, that comes out to "please break them". Exploring their adult lives and how their relationships and the Wixoss game affected them in the future would be amazing. What else happened to them? What are their careers like? What are their home lives like? Are they... living together? Does some sort of magic continue to be a theme in their lives? Feel free to write in-universe plot or no-powers universe, or some horrible Madoka or Yurikuma Arashi  or other magical girl thing, where they can all be horribly manipulative lesbians together because that's magical and wonderful. OTOH, if you want to write codependent-but-vaguely-functional adult Akira and Iona/Ulith being horrible assholes and having adventures of some sort (magic, detectives, idk) that is ALSO A+. I mean, I like happy endings, and if you can come up with something heartwarming (or "heartwarming") I'm not going to complain. Extra Details: Evil lesbians are Problematic, I know. But Akira was one of my favorite characters from the word go and (if you're paying attention to my fandoms as a whole) I really really like codependent or unhealthy relationships. I love her love/hate relationship with Iona and with Ulith, and the way those two characters sort of get mixed up for Akira specifically. If you want to play with Iona and Ulith's personalities and interactions as well, that would also be pretty fun. I'm also down for other types of AUs, like they have to get their shit together and track down someone who is killing Selectors, or they become selectors as adults and not girls. I know they're young, but given that this is a super-fucking dark canon, I am totally cool with dubiously consensual sex either on or off-screen. FANDOM: Yoroiden Samurai Troopers | Ronin Warriors (Shuu Rei Fuan | Kento Rei Fang, Mouri Shin | Cye Mouri) The Series: Ronin Warriors, known in Japan as Yoroiden Samurai Troopers (lit. "Legendary Armor Samurai Troopers"), is a Japanese anime series and manga adaptation created by Hajime Yatate. It's the story of five teenage boys, given mystical armor to protect the world from the evil Arago. 1000 years ago, Arago nearly succeeded in taking over the human world when Kaosu managed to defeat him. Although Arago's soul is banished to the demon world, his armor is left intact. Kaosu divided the armor into nine separate armor suits. Each armor will choose its bearer, and together they will fight Arago. At least that was the original intent... Although Arago manages to corrupt four sets of the armor, the last five remain safe. It's a bit like Power Rangers, only grounded in more serious traditional Japanese cultural trappings. Being created in the 80s, the art style is a little wonky, but it's an enjoyable thriller and is somewhat more focused and serious than a lot of sentai shows. The anime can be found on Crunchyroll here Request: I love Shuu/Shin with Shin being snarktastic and Shuu being smug and solid and dependable. I used to frequent the Minkland archive back when this fandom still kinda existed, and was forever disappointed that the skinny pretty boys got tons and tons of fic and Shuu was just sort of there in the background. (If you used to read Mink and Jink's fic, I will be so happy I could cry if I got that sort of cracked-out porny fic with Shuu, okay. Due to that formative influence, if you want to GO FOR THE AU, GO FOR IT WITH GUSTO. I've always wanted nanshoku/samurai AU. Or, you know, hooker fic, or dark!troopers fic, or harem fic or something like that. I also like found-family fic, gen-ish mysteries and adventures-- more fighting Massive Cosmic Evil, and curtainfic. Futurefic is also awesome, where they get on with their lives, maybe together or maybe trying to keep their friendships intact when there's no massive Cosmic Evil to keep them close. Extra Details: If you used to read Mink and Jink's fic, I will be so happy I could cry if I got that sort of cracked-out porny, possibly AU fic with Shuu, okay Fics I especially enjoyed from that archive: The Grand One The Clit Club Chronicles The Harem Vinyl Wagashi Cherry Zima Threesome Theater of Magic Due to that formative influence, if you want to GO FOR THE AU, GO FOR IT WITH GUSTO. I've always wanted nanshoku/samurai AU (see this image). Or, you know, hooker fic, or dark!troopers fic, or harem fic or something like that. My usual ships are Shin/Shuu, Shin/Ryo, Touma/Seiji and Ryo/Nasuti. But I multiship and am willing to run with anything-- I'm a Sex With All Teammates sort of person, so fivesomes and alternate pairings are not a problem for me. Dragon Prince Trilogy - Melanie Rawn: Ianthe of Princemarch, Sioned of River Run The Series: To blatantly steal someone else's review on Amazon: "Melanie Rawn created a world and a people that gives everything you could possibly want in a fantasy world. It gives love, hate, peace, war, magic, royalty, commoners, children to take over the next generation and best of all; dragons." I want to say "if this wasn't the matched fandom you should go out and read them right the fuck now', because I have read these books So Many Times.  They're high fantasy novels about politics and the prince of a desert and magical people who communicate via sunlight and can conjure fire. AND DRAGONS. Also a lot of interpersonal and romantic maneuverings. It's a high fantasy politics and romance romp of somewhere ~550 pages. If that sounds interesting to you, pretty much every used bookstore I have ever been to has at least one copy of these books. I think they spawn on bookshelves or something. The books are also available in ebook form here (Kindle) and here (Nook) for 3 bucks. Please read them. (TW for rape in the first book) The Request: I love everything this series chooses to be. It's fun and cheesy and fantasy, which the best thing in the world. I've always thought that Ianthe had a serious hate-crush on Sioned and part of the reason she was so vicious and fucked up was that whole "you must marry a guy and expand the empire or your useless" thing when maybe she didn't want to do that. Ianthe's always been one of my favorite characters because she's brilliant and ruthless and clearly takes joy in clever plans that go well. Of course, being the villain in a cheesy fantasy, she got no depth whatsoever, aside from that whole sexually liberated, taking male consorts thing (which is AWESOME, okay.) Sioned is also awesome and brilliant and kick ass. Her hesitance in the first book while she decided what she really wanted to do was pretty great, as was the fact that she promptly made friends with Tobin and pretty much every character not designated "villain". It seems like up through Ianthe's death, they're playing a game of brinkmanship. (Which isn't to say I don't like Sioned and Rohan together. They're bookTP and totally awesome.) As for prompts, I normally prefer plotty fic to introspection. I feel like the whole sunrunner thing lends itself well to espionage, so political thriller, or murder mysteries or something would be great. If you want to do plot-what-plot involving these two-- either sex or just the sort of dancing around/pigtail pulling that would be great. Threesomes with Rohan-- also acceptable! Hell, if you want to do an AU where they end up together instead of Sioned marrying Rohan-- or alternately, an AU end to the trilogy, where Ianthe never died in the fire and ends up taking over as High Princess and making the Desert monarchs' lives hell and discovering her powers. Or something where she knew about her powers all along. Or Sioned, I don't know, realizing she kind of did think Ianthe was attractive. I also really enjoy Pandsala, but I didn't find her dynamic with Sioned and Rohan quite as engaging, even though she also did some bad-ass stuff in the long run. Her weird push and pull backstabby, politicized sisterly thing was interesting, though. Extra Details: Okay, like I said, I think this series is the cheesiest fantasy series in the WORLD and in a lot of ways it's one of my first nostalgia fandoms. If you haven't read them, they are kind of ridiculously long (Like, GRR Martin-long), but they're quick reads despite that and rather less depressing than a lot of high fantasy. It's silly in the way that "adult fantasy" that takes itself way too seriously can be. A lot of the main protagonists actively enjoy each others' company and that's as much integral to the book as the politics and dragon-slaying. That said, I kinda asked for a semi-serious plotty story. But if you want to run with the "it's cheesy fantasy" and want to write about Ianthe rescuing princesses or Sioned running away to be a knight and abducting Ianthe away from her toxic father, or something silly, I say get down with your nerd self and run with it. I've only read parts of the second trilogy, and the second generation aren't really very interesting to me. If you want to write future-fic, I would prefer that it continues to focus on the original generation (no matter how much I love Andry, Pol just seems like kind of a jerk).

House of M - New X-Men: Academy X: Any The Series: I'm surprised it took me so long to nominate and request this fandom. I love New X-Men and was GUTTED when Decimation forced them into killing off so many of the characters. If you've never read it, New X-Men: Academy X was an X-Man title in the mid-00's, focusing on entirely new students at Xavier's Academy, being taught by the more established characters. Some of the New X-Men have managed to escape and become general Marvel characters in their own rights (David Alleyne, for example), but for the most part, they were just teenagers at school who rarely got caught up in larger plots. 616 New X-Men were about teenagers fighting, and coming to grips with the fact that they're being raised and taught to go sacrifice themselves for a Greater Goal. They're all wonderfully, horribly traumatized teenagers with powers. The plots were fleshed out and realistic, and when they weren't they were still interesting or fun. This request isn't technically for that. It's for the House of M megacrossover from 2009. Wanda Maximoff, mutant reality shifter and sometimes-crazy-lady, decided that mutants should run the world. SO THEY DID. And suddenly the lives of our young students become very different. Half of them after still "New Mutants", working towards peace, and the others are "Hellions", SHIELD trainees in a violently anti-homo-sapien state system. I've always felt that House of M as a narrative concept has been dismissed too easily by Marvel fans, because there are so many pieces of worldbuilding left unbuilt. I'm most interested in seeing it from the eyes of younger participants who are being trained or have been trained for their places. What does that world look like? New X-Men: Academy X can be found online here: https://viewcomics.me/comic/new-x-men-2004. The House of M crossover runs for issues 16-19. The Request: There's a lot here to play with because the authors never really got to play in either the Academy X OR the House of M sandboxes long enough to do all of their ideas justice. So I'm going to lay out some of the stuff I liked most about NXM in general and HoM in particular. The nom is for HoM, but I think HoM is most interesting in conversation with the standard 616 universe, alongside having the fun YA action stuff and the complicated interpersonal relationships. For example: in 616 Josh joined the Reavers and pretended not to be a mutant until he was confronted with Laurie nearly dying. I can imagine a bunch of different scenarios for House of M that would lead to where we see Josh and Laurie in the HoM comics (Laurie undercover with the New Mutants, and Josh working as an interrogator alongside Kevin). Laurie's introversion in 616 juxtaposed against her brazen treachery and clear control over her skills in HoM. HoM shows Kevin in a full decontamination suit, but we know in 616 that his ability is blocked by wearing synthetic fibers (I imagined this to be a interrogator scare tactic, but it could be any number of other things). Kevin and Josh's relationship in 616 is fraught, especially with Josh's previous experiences with anti-mutant activists and the fact that Kevin killed his father when his powers manifested. But they seemed to work together well in HoM. And speaking of Kevin-- how did his powers manifesting actually pan out in a universe where mutants aren't seen as a threat? I have to wonder whether there's some concept of "acceptable casualties" because some peoples' powers clearly manifest first in dangerous situations. Alternatively: Fluffy Josh/Kevin with a backdrop of torture, murder and state violence. I ship mostly Josh/Kevin because rivals-to-lovers and boy-who-kills-anything-he-touches/boy-who-cannot-be-killed is Great For Me. I also love the abuse of powers and manipulation involved in being interrogators/torturers(/murderers?) for the House of Magneto. They work together, they hurt people together, but maybe they also... smooch? THAT SAID! Adding Laurie to that ship is always a great way to fuck up and destabilize them! Especially in HoM, where we know she's already keeping secrets and can and WILL use her pheromones to fuck with people. And David! OH, DAVID. The only real New Mutant in this request. Does he have previous relationships with Josh and/or Kevin? I don't mind David/Noriko, but I also ship David with Kevin and Josh, and also Tommy and Teddy from Young Avengers, if you feel like exploring other parts of the HoM world. I have never considered David/Laurie before, but if you want to give it a whirl, I'm down. As for David-- His responses to state violence (as evidenced by the Hellions and SHIELD) are clearly different from the rest of the requested characters, and it would be interesting to explore David and his experience of this universe. Are his powers still restrained the same way? I know he supposedly dies at the end of the HoM mini-arc, but we never see them die, so feel free to write David managing to crawl off and plan to take down everything and everyone. A specific DNW for this fandom is Josh/Rahne. I don't mind the relationship having existed and impacting the characters, but only as a past relationship.

Extra Details:

SENSORY DETAILS. When it comes to magic and meta powers-- especially ones that aren't battle-oriented-- is what they feel like. What does it MEAN for David to be able to know anything someone else knows? What does the emptiness and fullness of it do to him? Josh's powers are all tactile and his body actively changes after trauma (in 616, first by turning him gold, then by creating black spots on his skin after he kills someone for the first time). Does his power always alter him, but usually in unnoticeable ways? What can he know and feel from a touch? Same for Kevin-- does withering sate a hunger, or make him feel worse? What would it feel like if he touched Josh? And Laurie... I'd love both her thought-process and the sensory details of what she's doing. Can she smell her own pheromones? Do they ever affect her? What does she feel like when she's manipulating people so subtly that they barely notice a passing smell? If you want to bring in other 616 knowledge and see what it looks like in HoM, that's cool. So is bringing in other HoM storylines. There's a throw-away line in Luke Cage's HoM crossover that the Runaways are known as an organized crime group. Cage himself runs a resistence cell (and given the end of the NXM crossover, David seems like he'd be willing to throw in with that lot). Young Avengers, the other New X-Men who weren't given much screentime in the HoM crossover-- I'd love any of that. Young Justice (Comics): Match, Tim Drake

The Series: Comics are confusing! This request is for the late-90s version of Young Justice by Peter David, which consisted of Robin, Impulse, Superboy, Arrowette, Secret, and Wonder Girl, along with others. It's very much a young-heroes-trying-to-make-their-way. Unlike the newer show, this Young Justice tended to be left on their own without much of a guiding hand. It was a very 90s comic, with very 90s fashion and a lot of nod-nod-wink-wink in-jokes. I love it because it's a series that always wore its humor on its sleeve. It's an affectionate look at young superheroes, and allowed them to react to teen problems alongside the more standard superhero tropes. There's the possibility for angst and darkness (and once they graduated to Teen Titans especially, that came up more), but they were allowed to be both hurt and upset AND fun and cheerful. The comics weren't available collected until last year (it took them TWENTY YEARS JFC), and it's well-worth buying from your local retailer, but you can also find them online here. The character I'm requesting first appeared in Superboy's solo series (starting in issue #35), which can be found here and again in the first volume of Young Justice: Sins of Youth. The Request: SO! I have always loved Match in the original YJ and Superboy comics, and the writers gave him really short shrift. We have a clone of Kon, who is as smart, if not smarter, can pretend to be Kon for extended periods of time— but every time he tries, people get hurt or die. I’ve always wondered how Tim felt that he literally couldn’t tell his best friend from an imposter. And then Match went and ran off and disappeared and no one ever seemed to consider what he was doing, after thousands of his/Kon’s siblings/clones were murdered essentially in front of him and the Agenda fell apart. (I’m not entirely surprised that Kon didn’t pay attention to all of those clones of him dying, but think about it from the standpoint of someone for whom those were supposed to be an army of his siblings. What a way to get survivor’s guilt.) Did Match go to Lex? It doesn’t seem like it, but given that as Kon’s clone, he’s technically Lex’s son too, it’s a possibility. Or alternately! He got himself out of the superhero game and did something else! What was it? I’d also love for a story about him wanting to be a super and have that family that Kon and Clark have, but being shut out of that world because he’s a “villain”. Or him getting that family after so long. Or him showing up at the Kents’ place because “fuck it, if Kon can have this, so can I” and it goes… well or poorly, depending on you. Or him finding his own family in a place that is separate from the who superhero thing, and Kon or Tim or Clark stumbling on him. Or Lex trying to use him— whether or not it works is up to you, although I’d love for it to touch on Match’s need to be part of something larger— after all, he was built and trained to be the vanguard for an army that was summarily murdered in front of him. Tim's refusal to even vaguely hint about his real identity during this time is fun too-- we have two boys who are both hiding their identities in different ways. It makes me wonder if Tim COULD have figured Match out, if the Sins of the Youth plotline didn't happen or was delayed somehow, because he seems to have all of the pieces of information. Or maybe Match-as-Kon was the only person Tim revealed part of his real name too, and has to deal with the ramifications of trust. Actually, Tim and the Issues Of Trust is the YA novel that I'd love to see Tim and Match (and Kon and the rest of YJ) star in. Bring back Mr Sarcastic (PLEASE bring back Mr Sarcastic) and Alvin Draper. Bring back the way that Tim hides by burrowing under identities and performances, and collects information on everyone he knows. I love detective stories and, out of all the Bats, Tim has always struck me as one of the best actual detectives, rather than crime-fighters. So Tim getting lost in a mystery will always make me happy. There's also something interesting about a group of young teens fighting for their own autonomy and identity. At this point in Tim's story, I think he was still thinking of the Robin thing as almost an extracurricular, and probably grappling with how hard it is on him physically, as well as mentally. So, I guess struggling for a coherent snse of self and agency are really interesting touchstones in this fandom. ALSO, MY DEEPLY HELD RARE PAIR FROM THE 90s: Tim/Match! See above, re: Match being present for Identity Crisis instead of Kon. I’d love Match to be trying to follow Kon’s footsteps re: Cassie, and being way more into Tim, which leads to Tim being confused and into Kon. Also any of the above prompts can include Tim (maybe Tim tries to help cushion a meeting between Match and Kon or Clark! Or maybe he just ends up Match’s sugar daddy. I’m down.) Although this request is ripe for dubious identity weirdness with Match pretending to be Kon, I'd really prefer that you focus on Match getting to be his own person, even if there's some pretending-to-be-Kon in there. Extra Details: This has been a lowkey love of mine for literally decades. My absolute favorite gift of all time was original pages from one of the Superboy issues where Match appears for the first time. And as I've grown older, my love for this rare, obscure character has deepened. Also, as I've grown older, I've begun to want more adult!Match, or growing up!Match just because the idea of growing up in the margins of superhero culture after everything that happened to him is really interesting. He was straight-up groomed and brainwashed, and then the Agenda was gone, so how did he cope? What is he doing now? What kind of adult does he make? This request is specifically for the mid-90s comic, so feel free to stick to that. But if you read the 2010-era Teen Titans and want to explore some later story choices-- like Match becoming Bizarro-like, Slade making him part of Titans East, or his fear that Jericho would hurt the Titans in his body, or save Match from Superboy-Prime, I'm not going to complain. (Personal headcanon time: I think Slade was trying to mind control Match with the same stuff he used on Rose, and it caused the Bizarro-like symptoms). I also love Elseworlds and mirror!verse stuff too. As I've said elsewhere in the letter, I really prefer Happily Ever After/Happily For Now stuff, and I prefer my bittersweet fics heavy on the sweetness. Please give Match the love and affection he's always deserved. But also, please feel free to make both Match and Tim HURT first.

[le-petitmort]

Part II – This thing is about to be a thing

In one-point-four seconds I came to the realization that I am quite literally…the dumbest motherfucker ever. First, I never got her digits. Second…I never got her digits. Disgraceful. Where was my situational awareness? It was akin to a scrawny defender putting pressure up court on the opposing team’s guard, not paying attention and running smack dab into a pick set by a seven foot chiseled like a bronze formed by the hands of Donatello, NBA center. Basketball metaphors…get used to them.

Anyway, it knocked the wind out of my sails. The reason being is that I had formulated this grandiose plan for her to make the first move beyond the first move. To engage the conversation. Open the forum. Get the small talk out the way. Allowing me to pitter patter and tiptoe my way past the threshold of awkwardness and straight to the glory road of getting to know her intimately.

By intimately, I’m not talking about straight to boom, boom, out go the lights carnal skullduggery complete with passionate wet kisses, heavy petting and cock to pussy communication. I was angling for dinner first. Not wine, dine and sixty-nine dinner either. I had it built up in my head that I was going to treat this one like a lady. Later on, I could whisper filthy invitations in her ear that would make her coo, as my hand deftly slid up her thigh towards paradise. Getting to that point would be the hard part. Or maybe not.

Maybe, I had put this particular pussy on a pedestal. Perhaps she was a cum guzzling cock whore who jumped bed to bed trolling for fat cock in the ocean of fuckery that is Brooklyn?

Mayhap, she was one of those chicks who secretly delved into her passionate side by stroking the kitty by the light of her iPhone to kinky images on tumblr. Trolling for virtual cock with selfie side boob action, a toothy smile of seduction and a user name like…say…wantonbabygirldreamsandtequilamemories.

Perchance, all that was completely off base and she was raised right by her parents. A pristine catholic girl with of heart and mind of gold, devout in her love of our lord and savior Jesus Christ who would be spending good Friday getting ashes thumbed on her forehead…or whatever it is Catholics do on that religious day. I’m agnostic so, I have zero idea and I highly doubt she’s Ms. Goodytwoshoes since I had already noted in passing that she likes a smoke and a cocktail in the evening. Plus, she wears those fancy stocking that scream “unwrap me Daddy and see the present beneath”.

Let’s get back on point. This is how much I’ve thought into her. The epitome of pussy on a pedestal syndrome. Now, we’ve had an actual conversation. Albeit, a very short conversation. Brevity is sometimes good…except when you don’t get the digits.

The face to face was going to have to happen. Overcoming my fear of ineptitude and delving into my inner rico suave. A little more toned down though, than an unbuttoned white shirt to the navel, smooth talking lothario schtick. But, more than simply me. Yep, this girl has me all sorts of fucked up.

You’re probably wondering, “what’s with all the self-loathing, dude?”. I admit it’s got to be a bit of a turn off so, here’s the back story. No, I am not a virgin who sprawls across the couch in my jockey’s eating flamin’ hot Cheetos whilst penning dirty poems to lewd images on tumblr under a username such as…bigdongdaddysearchingforhootchiecocksluts. I’m also not the kind of man who walks into a room, drawing in beautiful, leggy, big busted vixens like steel to a magnet. I’m somewhere in the middle.

A relationship failure who gets too wrapped up in his work. Which can come off as neglectful to a significant other. But, I’ve had a plan since I was eighteen that I’d be retired on a beach in Mexico by the time I was forty, with my gorgeous wife and two adorable children playing in the sand as I sip a corona and reminisce about all the good times.

You see, I like plans. I don’t like flying by the seat of my pants. Life is analytical. Meant to be linear with a point A, B, C and onward. Peaks and valleys are for the weak. Which is why, when I first spied my dream girl promenading down the crooked sidewalks of Williamsburg, I stopped the initial urge to go in for the kill and went with formulation of a process. Fucking up in love multiple times will do such things to a man.

The plan was off though, for now. I wasn’t going to be able to slap another ”call me, maybe” note on her morning coffee to pique interest. That was already done. Mutual admiration and quite possibly mutual eye fucking were already in play. She had said it herself! Not so much in those words. But, I’d been noticed. How had I not noticed her noticing me? I really am daft at this shit…or maybe I need a lightning bolt of confidence in my life?

Is this moment it? Is that all I needed was the knowledge that there was a connection from across the room that I hadn’t felt? Was there truly distant simpatico? Was kismet closer than the vacuum of my unsure, fearful mind? Do we already have a thing for each other?! Holy fuck. These are the questions whirring in my head at 5 AM. Just like the ceiling fan spinning full speed above my bed. I’m one hundred twenty miles an hour of jubilation and angst. As much as I pride myself on a linear lifestyle, I climb to the mountain summit and hurl myself into a canyon of doubt with every passing second spent thinking about her.

I can hear the city coming to life. The traffic beginning to snarl. The metal clank of bodega doors rolling open. A single bird stationed on it’s perch singing.

I should be ambling into my office, coffee cup in hand starting my so-called work day. Instead I’m counting the minutes before I jump in the shower, clean up and go finish business with my future paramour. Yes sir, I’m forcing myself to project a dose of swagger. Laying here, mean mugging like an NBA power forward who just euro-stepped his way to a thundering game-changing dunk. I’m a winner, baby! Shelve that pitiful shit, bruh. You da man! Get fuckin’ fired up!

Which is why I basically pimp walked my way to the coffee shop when the time came for action. Outfit: casual. A hoodie from my alma mater, jeans with a strategic knee rip, green Nike air force ones on my feet. I popped straight through the shop door towards the familiar blonde at the counter like I owned the place. Ya boy iz in da house! Woof, woof, woof!

“Large straight black and a skinny latte, please.” I winked, expecting she’d question why I was getting two drinks instead of one.

She went straight to brewing and giving me the inflated total. “Twelve even. Name, please.” Ok, babe, maybe you don’t understand that lives are about to change in mere minutes. A whole cosmic galaxy is about to open up. Astronomers like Neil Degrasse Tyson will be talking about the cavalcade of stars falling out of the sky because two lips met at an overpriced local coffee shop in Brooklyn. Guess I’m getting ahead of myself there.

“Stephen…with a P.” I responded.

Apprehension and giddiness course through me. Giddiness seems unmanly but, my excitement isn’t. I’m bouncing heel to toe as our drinks magically appear before me. I check my phone one last time. Knowing her punctuality, we are currently at T minus 2 minutes and counting. Ps. I am not a stalker…to reiterate.

I grab the steaming drinks and fly towards the door, nearly tumbling over a shorty with her nose buried her phone. No time for apologies, I must nail down a cozy table on the sidewalk. I want this first meeting to be something the entire five boroughs of New York stops in awe to witness.

But, there she is coming through the door just as I reach for it. The coffees are in one hand and I can feel them about to crash right into her. I swivel my wrist, going for the save. No fucking way am I flinging a skinny latte across the object of my forever affections. Fuck no. Shit. There it goes. Whoa…steady as she goes. Eye widening panic! Boom goes the dynamite! My fingers grip the cups harder and safely held. Crisis averted.

Cool and casual like that. “Here you go Iona.” I handed over her drink with a smile.

“Iona?” She looked at me puzzled.

My eyes darted, alarmed. “Uh, yesterday…when you made your order here. Uh…you told the cashier your name was Iona?” Now it was time for my own quizzical. “Your name is Iona…right?”

She blew out a breath. The kind that shoots upward, blowing a dangling strand of her bangs from her rolling at being caught in a fib eyes. “That’s a thing I do. To sound exotic.” She gave a quick shake of the head and nodded to the counter. “I change it up every day. Glenda, Marion, Billie Jean...Iona. Whatever I’m feeling like that day.”

Her hand casually reached for a true introductory shake. “My real name is Tuesday…and I already know you’re Stephen…with a P.”

My smile was contemplatively wry. “Isn’t Tuesday an exotic enough name already? I mean…I’ve never met a Tuesday.”

“Yeah, well, a girl has to have many faces. One must stay intriguing and beguiling.”

“I’m intrigued and beguiled.” I shot back. Somehow feeling comfortable in my skin for a change.

The corners of her lips curved. “Mutual.”

Relaxation immediately struck. My entire being at ease. A wordless infinity.

“But, I’m sorry Stephen. Much as I’d like to sit down and get to know you, I have to be to work in five minutes. I’m all about a strict schedule.” Nice! She really is perfection.

“I completely understand that.”

Tuesday fished a hand into her oversized tote, withdrawing a business card which she handed over. “I neglected to leave you my number last night. I was a little jittery over it all…well...you know.” Our eyes locked. Mesmerizing. “Will you call me for dinner?” She questioned as if there was some sort of doubt.

“Absolutely.” I opened the door, leading her through. Two fingers steadied at the small of her back. Feeling a response as Tuesday’s back comfortably adjusted.

She turned to me on the street, one last parting moment.  Words breaking apart the sweetest lips I’d ever laid eyes on. “Thanks for latte. I like a man who gets me coffee in the morning…cliché, I know.”

“The pleasure was all mine.”

Tuesday paused, giving thought to one last message. “Just so you know…I don’t do personal calls or texts during the work day. So, don’t bother. I’m married to my career. I have a plan.”

I gave the thumbs up. Fucking perfection.

-bart 4.20.2019

[hollyoaksloversx]

Spreading Hatred...

Rounding up a week in Hollyoaks (11th-15th March 2019)

This week was perhaps one of the most uncomfortable weeks of Hollyoaks I’ve sat through, as Ste Hay’s far right extremism story took centre stage. It was also incredibly compelling to watch and the terrible news coming out of New Zealand this weekend, proves that Hollyoaks are right to bring this issue to the public’s attention. At the start of the week, Imran was still giving himself a hard time for attacking Ste, and Tony decided it was his duty to tell the Maalik’s the truth, resulting in Ste punching Sami and being suspended from the tea house when new boss, Stuart, witnessed the fight. With Ste furiously stomping around the flat, Peri decided that his feud with the Maalik’s had gone far enough and invited them round for dinner that evening. Ste was initially completely against the idea, however, he was given food for thought when Peri pointed out that he had been just as bad as Imran at one point, but people had been good enough to give him a second chance and he reluctantly agreed to attend. Unfortunately, Ste had a bad day when Stuart informed him that he’d lost his job indefinitely and he threw the Maalik’s out when he returned home to find them sitting round the table.

The following morning, Peri presented Ste with an unpaid bill and demanded to know what he was going to do about it. Ste continued to blame the Maalik’s for his current predicament, and he said as much to Leah when she walked into the room, telling her that he would have to cancel their holiday as a result. Later, at school, Leah cornered Imran in the corridor and blamed him for her family’s problems. Leah was stopped in her tracks as she grabbed hold of Imran and went to punch him, and Ste and Sami were quickly called into school to discuss the altercation. As Ste ranted and raved about Imran ‘targeting’ Leah, he was stopped in his tracks when Laurie revealed that Leah had been the instigator, and told Ste to get a grip of himself. With no job, and now having to deal with his daughter being drawn into the conflict, a devastated Ste returned to the village, and was seen eyeing up Sami’s car whilst holding a screw driver. He was stopped from damaging the vehicle by Jonny, who took Ste back to the flat and suggested he move in. Although Ste was delighted by the new arrangement, the same couldn’t be said for Peri, who was left feeling deeply uncomfortable by a comment Jonny made about Muslims...

Although Ste appeared unfazed by the comment, Peri wasn’t willing to let it go, and demanded that Ste have a word with Jonny. Jonny feigned horror over the situation and managed to convince Ste that there had been no malice in his words. Keen to keep Ste onside, Jonny convinced Stuart to give Ste his job back, and the pair invited Ste and Lucas to attend a football match with them and some of their mates. However, it soon became apparent that these were not people Ste should be mixing with as, whilst Stuart kept Ste talking inside, telling him that he would always be welcome with them, Jonny and co beat a man outside in a racially motivated attack. With no knowledge of what had occurred, Ste spent the rest of the day with the group, and was delighted by how well they all seemed to get on and how accepting they were of his sexuality and past addictions. However, the following day, DS Yates turned up at the tea house to investigate the attack, and questioned Ste over whether or not any of his group had left the pub at any point. Despite knowing that they had, Ste covered for Jonny. Whilst Jonny may have been able to win Ste round easily, he was having a far harder time with Peri, who was left suspicious when she walked in on Stuart and Jonny in cahoots. Needing to think of an excuse quickly, Jonny made Peri feel uncomfortable when he told her that he had a crush on her, and had simply been asking Stuart for advice.

Meanwhile, as Ste spent time with his new friends, Aunty Kameela was holding a dinner party for the Maalik’s, minus Misbah, who was away on a course. Kameela quickly found herself at loggerheads with Sami when she invited Liberty to the meal without his knowledge and the pair butted heads again later over their differing ideas over what it means to be a Muslim in 21st century Britain. Fantastic scenes, which juxtaposed perfectly with Ste being sucked further and further into the grasp of the extremists.

Elsewhere this week, there was trouble in paradise for Sally and Myra as Sally was once again left questioning Myra’s commitment to her, especially when Myra didn’t correct the priest when he assumed she was marrying a man. Sally was further crushed when Nana left one of Myra’s old wedding scrapbooks lying around and she realised it was full of pictures of men. In order to get Myra excited about marrying Sally again, Nana took her for a night out at the Duke Street Social, where Myra ended up having a snog with the DJ, as witnessed by Scott. Scott confronted a guilty Myra over her actions a couple of days later, and Myra promised Scott she would come clean. However, she couldn’t bring herself to do so and instead, threw herself into planning her wedding to Sally.

In other news this week, with Harry and James back from their holiday, Mac began piling the pressure on Breda to kill James before the court case. There was relief all round when Maxine’s test results showed that there was nothing wrong with her whilst we finally saw a human side to Liam as he spent time with baby Iona. Finally, Harley decided to leave the village and was touched when Tom gifted her some money to put towards her dream of working with Orangoutangs. 

5 Things We Learned This Week:

1. There are many ways to leave Hollyoaks. You can die in an unusual manner, such as being stabbed by a samurai sword like Callum Kane, or you can sail off on a barge with Cat Deeley like Rory ‘Finn’ Finnegan. This week saw Harley bid farewell as she left to ‘save the orangoutangs’. Ten points for originality, Hollyoaks!

2. Always look for the man in drag when about to cheat on your partner. Yes, it could be a beautiful woman sat at the bar, but it could also be one of your neighbours, who just happens to have a voice that can be heard from space. 

3. Leah Barnes would make the perfect case study in the ‘nature vs nurture’ debate. She may not be Ste’s biological daughter, but she was certainly channeling him this week as she gave Imran what for. Let’s just hope that’s as far as the similarities go. I don’t want to see Leah don a tracksuit any time soon. 

4. Peri Lomax is all kinds of amazing right now. I loved her calling Ste out on his treatment of the Maaliks, especially when she reminded him of all the terrible things he got up to in his youth. It sometimes feels that the show itself forgets that Ste used to be a hateful little shit so it was great to see the characters actually acknowledge it. 

5. Tony is most definitely not a homophobe. He’s got a gay son and a rainbow flag in his restaurant window to prove it!

Characters Featured:

Aunty Kameela, Breda, Damon, Donna-Marie, DS Yates, Goldie, Grace, Harley, Harry, Imran, Iona, James, Jesse, Joel, Jonny, Juliet, Laurie, Leah, Liam, Liberty, Lucas, Mac, Maxine, Mercedes, Misbah, Myra, Nana McQueen, Peri, Romeo, Sally, Sami, Scott, Sienna, Ste, Stuart, Sylver, Tom, Tony and Yasmine. 

Past Characters Mentioned:

Amy Barnes, Nico Blake, Maggie Kinsella, Neeta Kaur and Tegan Lomax. 

[homosociallyyours]

@missrefridgefreetorator this got too long for replies so I'm making it a text post -- I've often said I'm gonna write an AU of pretty in pink where Duckie is a baby butch who's pining hard for her best friend, Andy, who's chubby and awkward and has great fashion sense but is generally confused about who she is as a person & her sexuality & everything. Suddenly this cute boy is coming onto her and taking her out, though, and she thinks maybe she's gonna get to live the dream and be typically pretty with a hot bf. And then he ghosts her so hard and she's crying over it, and iona, who's a cool ass older queer woman who changes her styles to suit her moods but never her dates, tells her that what she was looking for was actually a really toxic fantasy. And that andy has everything she needs within herself. She doesn't need to get skinny or dress a certain way to deserve love. And fuck it, she should go to the prom!!

And Andy goes and makes a really cool dress at the last minute and calls Duckie, who in spite of her pining has been really supportive throughout all of this, and asks if they could go to prom together. And Duckie says yes, and when she sees Andy you can see her heart popping out of her chest like FUCK I'M SO IN LOVE. And Andy looks at her and does a double take bc she's never realized anyone could look at her like that, and also umm Duckie looks pretty good too??

And the shitty rich boy is there and tries to make amends with Andy, but she looks over her shoulder at Duckie and says thanks but no thanks and then Andy's taking Duckie's face in her hands and telling her she's pretty amazing and Duckie being like, "do you maybe wanna kiss someone who's pretty amazing, or?" And the music swells over their kiss and the entire theater full of gays fucking cries into their popcorn bc this is the movie we deserve!!!

Andy is still working class!! She and Duckie are weirdos in this town where they feel like nothing will ever change!!!

I'm very passionate about it, but my follow thru is shit so I've never done more than write a scene once and yell about the idea in text posts.

[theenduringsun]

okay well @melodymeddler​ has asked me to do All of my ocs so here we go! (it’s under a readmore so you dont have my children clogging your dash)

galatea

Full Name: galatea lol Gender and Sexuality: demigirl, polysexual & polyamorous Pronouns: she/her or they/them Ethnicity/Species: gerudo  Birthplace and Birthdate: uhhhh Desert and november 4th Guilty Pleasures: she’s a good person usually but sometimes ya just gotta be Morally Ambiguous, ya feel? Phobias: losing her control of herself, death What They Would Be Famous For: saving the world!! What They Would Get Arrested For: stealing shit like cmon honey OC You Ship Them With: narei! OC Most Likely To Murder Them: probably dhulsaei but it’d be like a huge misunderstanding lol Favorite Movie/Book Genre: action/adventure. like tomb raider because That Her Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when there are love triangles! she’s like “date both of them asshole!” Talents and/or Powers: very stealthy, agile, and acrobatic. can also talk her way out of anything Why Someone Might Love Them: the snark is real, has the wittiest retorts Why Someone Might Hate Them: bc she started as part of an oc/canon character ship lol How They Change: she learns not to rush headlong into things and learns that she’s not infallible. she also learns not to judge things by appearances like she hates when people do to her Why You Love Them: she was one of my first ocs that i started developing independently! i’ve really got a soft spot for her

narei: 

Full Name: prince narei (i’m not sure that gerudo have last names? so he doesnt have one lol) Gender and Sexuality: cis male, pansexual Pronouns: he/him Ethnicity/Species: gerudo Birthplace and Birthdate: Nonspecific Gerudo Village (not gerudo valley tho), july 13th Guilty Pleasures: romance novels Phobias: he’s really scared of cold. he doesn’t have much experience with it and fears that his limbs will fall off. What They Would Be Famous For: being a somewhat okay leader (with help) What They Would Get Arrested For: dark magic (he did apologize though) OC You Ship Them With: galatea (it’s mostly one-sided though) OC Most Likely To Murder Them: dhulsaei, but only if he’s actively endangering someone Favorite Movie/Book Genre: he says it’s action/adventure but, like i said before, the boy loves a good romance novel Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: miscommunication (you can catch him in his quarters screaming “JUST TELL HER” into his pillow. he should take his own advice) Talents and/or Powers: dark magic, swordfighting, handsomeness Why Someone Might Love Them: he honestly tries his best? most of the things that happen to him are not his fault (key word there: most) Why Someone Might Hate Them: he does a lot of things without thinking through them first, including spouting some pretty sexist ideology. however, he does grow past this, and it’s an important part of his character arc to me How They Change: he learns to look at all perspectives of an issue before taking it on, and he does a lot of introspection over his arc that helps him move more towards where he really wants to be Why You Love Them: he and galatea are my two favorite ocs because of how different they are tbh. i love putting them in situations where their differences complement each other and honestly i love how galatea helps him to be a better person. i just. yes

hokulani: 

Full Name: hokulani iona  Gender and Sexuality: cis female, bisexual Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: native alolan/hawaiian Birthplace and Birthdate: hau’oli city, march 16th Guilty Pleasures: fatty starchy foods. they’re not good for her but they’re good for her soul Phobias: being forgotten, not being able to speak up for herself What They Would Be Famous For: winning All the Medals in the paralympics! What They Would Get Arrested For: being young and reckless and accidentally doing something illegal OC You Ship Them With: a little bit with noelani but not really OC Most Likely To Murder Them: i don’t honestly think any of my ocs would? Favorite Movie/Book Genre: generic sports movies. she adores space jam with her whole soul Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: she hates rivalries, actually. she wants them to be friends Talents and/or Powers: she has incredible stamina, even though she’s in a wheelchair. she’s also very strong and will beat you in arm wrestling always Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s cute and determined lol Why Someone Might Hate Them: because she rushes in and does dumb things, and then is stubborn about how the thing she did was the right thing How They Change: i think she learns to accept her disability over the course of the island challenge, and she begins to see that she can do amazing things while being in a wheelchair (because she can!!) Why You Love Them: because i love paired ocs and she and noelani are my faves

noelani: 

Full Name: noelani kalani Gender and Sexuality: cis female, bi Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: native alolan/hawaiian Birthplace and Birthdate: iki town, march 16th  Guilty Pleasures: she likes to have coffee and chocolate past 9pm despite her insomnia Phobias: bugs. anything that is creepy crawly is a no from her. What They Would Be Famous For: her dance skills! she’s primarily a ballet dancer but she does other styles as well, and she’s very skilled as a ballerina :D What They Would Get Arrested For: being accomplice to something hokulani did OC You Ship Them With: a lil with hokulani OC Most Likely To Murder Them: mihlanna probably Favorite Movie/Book Genre: you know those horse movies everyone makes fun of? those are noelani’s favorite. Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: not sure this is a particular cliche, but she gets very bad secondhand embarrassment, so much that she’ll have to turn off the tv/stop reading and just walk around for a while to shake it off Talents and/or Powers: very skilled dancer, abnormally good balance even for a dancer Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s not the type of person who you’d expect to take the island challenge. she seemed to be content where she was, but she journeyed with hokulani anyway. Why Someone Might Hate Them: honestly? bc i have like no experience writing hawaiian/hawaiian-coded characters and i’m probably going to fuck it up at least six times (side note pleeeease tell me if anything i ever say is offensive because that is not my intent and i want to be the best person i possibly can <3) How They Change: noelani learns not to judge things by her first impression of them. for example she thought hokulani wouldn’t be able to do anything except sit at home after her accident, and yet they traveled across all of alola together! she also learns that when hokulani is set on something it will be done no matter the collateral damage lol Why You Love Them: she was the oc i made when primarina was first announced <3 i love dance, even though i’m not too good at it myself, so i love having an oc who’s good at dancing too.

camille belrose:

Full Name: camille adelaide belrose Gender and Sexuality: cis female, straight Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: kalosian/french Birthplace and Birthdate: coumarine city, june 16th Guilty Pleasures: chocolates and sugary things which are bad for her figure but FUCK when you’re crying about augustine sycamore at 3 am you need a box of russell stovers Phobias: bugs, if it crawls she hates it (except araquanid) What They Would Be Famous For: covering a huge story What They Would Get Arrested For: going the extra mile for a scoop (i shit you not she’s climbed fences before) OC You Ship Them With: none OC Most Likely To Murder Them: hokulani if only because they’d disagree on everything Favorite Movie/Book Genre: rom-coms Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when an “ugly” girl is just a pretty brunette with a curvy figure? like what the fuck? Talents and/or Powers: would do anything to get paid. anything. Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s arguably the most fashion-forward of my ocs and you wouldn’t catch her dead in something un-coordinated Why Someone Might Hate Them: she’s stuck up as fuuuuuuuck. also started as a canon character/oc like galatea lol How They Change: she becomes less snobby and more appreciative of the things around her Why You Love Them: because i love making her swear in french it’s my favorite thing

aria:

Full Name: ariadne jane raptis Gender and Sexuality: demigirl, straight Pronouns: she/her or xe/xir Ethnicity/Species: whatever the pokemon equivalent of greek is/sinnoh! Birthplace and Birthdate: twinleaf town, march 21st (i have a lot of pisces ocs holy shit) Guilty Pleasures: making people angry. it’s the one thing that keeps her sane Phobias: death, deep water What They Would Be Famous For: winning the most fucking super contests ever holy shit What They Would Get Arrested For: honestly? public intoxication, but not until she’s way older OC You Ship Them With: none OC Most Likely To Murder Them: mihlanna or cerys Favorite Movie/Book Genre: high fantasy this girl has a billion d&d characters Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when humans are always portrayed as the default race. like no tell her about gnomes please Talents and/or Powers: empath, very good at sewing, has a nice team of pokemon Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s adorable and also only five feet tall Why Someone Might Hate Them: she gets angry extremely easily and takes it out on everything around her How They Change: she learns how to work with other people without destroying entire towns in the process! Why You Love Them: sinnoh is the best region fight me.

cheyenne solberg:

Full Name: cheyenne rose solberg Gender and Sexuality: agender, pan Pronouns: they/them Ethnicity/Species: mixed native/white Birthplace and Birthdate: goldenrod city, august 13th Guilty Pleasures: pop music (it’s the same four chords but it’s so catchy) Phobias: losing their friends, dying alone What They Would Be Famous For: writing the best jazz cello repertoire known to man What They Would Get Arrested For: not caring enough and accidentally walking out of the house without a shirt on OC You Ship Them With: estelle!!!!!!! estelle!!!!!!! OC Most Likely To Murder Them: sylharice, she doesn’t see how they can just not care Favorite Movie/Book Genre: horror Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when the girl in the horror movie is a dumbass. like please Talents and/or Powers: mad cello skills, unyielding love for their gf Why Someone Might Love Them: they’re incredibly critical but also extremely appreciative of music Why Someone Might Hate Them: they don’t care enough. at all How They Change: i like to think that they learn to care a little lol Why You Love Them: i just made them yesterday and i love them!!!!!!!

estelle beaumont:

Full Name: estelle louise beaumont Gender and Sexuality: demigirl, lesbian Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: kalosian Birthplace and Birthdate: lumiose city, july 18th Guilty Pleasures: cute violin/cello duets with her enbyfriend!! Phobias: cheyenne losing interest in her (which will never happen) What They Would Be Famous For: being the best violinist! What They Would Get Arrested For: doing something illegal to stop cheyenne from doing something illegal OC You Ship Them With: cheyenne!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! OC Most Likely To Murder Them: galatea Favorite Movie/Book Genre: horror Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: jumpscares! she’ll be clinging to cheyenne nonstop Talents and/or Powers: very good violin girl, looks at things big-picture Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s a sweetheart holy shit???? Why Someone Might Hate Them: because she’s one of those “all sides” people who insists everyone gets a voice How They Change: she learns that some people just need to shut up. Why You Love Them: listen i made her and cheyenne yesterday they’re the greatest

sylharice amastacia:

Full Name: sylharice amastacia Gender and Sexuality: trans woman, gay as fuck Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: high elf Birthplace and Birthdate: somewhere in the wild, march 4th Guilty Pleasures: her flaw is “i can’t resist a pretty face”. she is quite literally too gay to function Phobias: losing her agency What They Would Be Famous For: creating the hit single “call me maybe but with all the pronouns changed to make it super gay” What They Would Get Arrested For: adultery....oops OC You Ship Them With: there’s a character in her backstory named diantha who she’s very much in love with but also diantha’s married so that’s a Bad OC Most Likely To Murder Them: dhulsaei Favorite Movie/Book Genre: smut novels Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: badly written foreplay Talents and/or Powers: she’s a very talented bard! she likes her rapier.  Why Someone Might Love Them: such a beautiful gay bard  Why Someone Might Hate Them: because i suck at using my offensive spells i’m sorry d&d group How They Change: i’m anticipating some coming-to-terms with the whole adultery thing in the future Why You Love Them: fuck dude i love playing gay bards

dhulsaei:

Full Name: dhulsaei aurelia doesn’t have a last name because her father was a rando Gender and Sexuality: demigirl, bisexual Pronouns: she/her Ethnicity/Species: sylph Birthplace and Birthdate: rugged reef, she can’t remember Guilty Pleasures: her vice is alcohol. she’s like always drunk Phobias: being controlled What They Would Be Famous For: saving the world with her posse What They Would Get Arrested For: public intoxication without a doubt OC You Ship Them With: i highkey ship her with @melodymeddler‘s oc leo lol OC Most Likely To Murder Them: sylharice probably Favorite Movie/Book Genre: epic plays Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when there’s an improperly translated bit of language/bilingual characters written terribly Talents and/or Powers: sylphy shit, very good at stealthing, way smarter than she looks Why Someone Might Love Them: she’s cute, she has a british accent, and she’s almost never sober. what’s not to love Why Someone Might Hate Them: she says she’s neutral good but she’s more on the chaotic side of that alignment How They Change: she’s learning that snooping on her party’s things can sometimes lead to bad things. also that if you challenge a boat to a drinking contest, you will lose and get turned into a dog. multiple times. Why You Love Them: i love playing dhulsaei holy shit. it’s all the me i’ll never be

kit willoughby:

Full Name: katrina carlotta willoughby (call them anything but kit and they’ll murder you) Gender and Sexuality: agender, bi Pronouns: they/them Ethnicity/Species: half-elf Birthplace and Birthdate: a port town, august 1st Guilty Pleasures: self insert fics Phobias: crashing and dying horrifically What They Would Be Famous For: a cool and daring expedition! What They Would Get Arrested For: flying in a no-fly zone OC You Ship Them With: none  OC Most Likely To Murder Them: dhulsaei, they’d get into a stubborn-off Favorite Movie/Book Genre: action/adventure Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when flying is written poorly, and they know Talents and/or Powers: they’re only a recruit right now but they know their shit (spoilers: they don’t but they defo act like they do) Why Someone Might Love Them: they’re spunky and resilient! Why Someone Might Hate Them: they do things without thinking them through fully. a lot. How They Change: they learn that they’re not always gonna be right, and that dying isn’t really that bad. Why You Love Them: full disclosure: they’re 100% a self-insert oc. i don’t give a fuck tho

[invinciblerodent]

The more I think about it, the more I'm into this happy little accident. Like it really turned my girl's emotional development throughout the story on top of its head, and I'm so happy it took me for such a ride, completely unintentionally.

I was planning that by the end of act 2, she'd be growing a bit more secure in her role and in her current persona that she's construced for herself, and the main angsting was supposed to come from the plot itself. But now, beyond the reveal of the form the Dream Guardian took for her (her ex-husband, which was supposed to spark an unpleasant conversation that'd make Astarion realize he actually barely knows anything about her past- mostly because he just. didn't ask?), I skimmed the elf chapter in Mordekainen's real quick, and I'm beginning to think this thing specifically will be an excellent little narrative device to act as an opportunity for very quick and intense bonding between Iona and Halsin.

Like, Halsin is a mature, categorically middle-aged elf with average-, to better than average emotional intelligence, and she, at 60, is technically almost a juvenile elf still. An adult for sure, but in human terms, they're like... a 40-year-old man and a 23-year-old woman. She's -comparatively- very young still, and she still gets some access to her primal memories when she's in her trance, though they've been getting less frequent (they're supposed to stop completely around the end of the first century- I don't know how undeath is supposed to affect the Drawing of the Veil, but I for one definitely hc that death cuts off the primal memories and basically forces an undead elf to "grow up" prematurely right then and there), and Halsin's casual warmth and general experience with these things probably comforts her more than either of them would have expected.

After seeing this thing, I think she'll become keenly aware that this, this isn't her first time being abducted: this really is just the first time she didn't die in the process. And she tries to move past it on her own, accept that that was just another one in her long line of past lives that was killed and stripped of her soul and psyche, but it's... very difficult. She keeps seeing it, in her trance, behind closed eyelids... for days, even beyond the Emperor's New Groove Big Reveal, she keeps reliving moments from that life. Who she was, what she did, how it ended. She keeps reliving that tragically short life that ended with her head stripped, flayed, and mounted on a table at an age even younger than she is now (because that face's maturity seems to be at 0), and no trace of "her" remaining beyond that grotesque effigy that's been there, used as a vessel, for gods know how long. She's going back and forth between "I should have taken it", "I should have smashed it", and "I should have just left it the fuck alone".

I kind of really like that this throws yet another wrench into this already pretty messed-up relationship. I like that it's all strained and weird now, with Astarion's mind almost singularly focused on Cazador and Ascension (even if it's partly also because of an unexpectedly intense desire to protect her), and his stunted emotional growth that makes him much too impulsive and obtuse for an elf his age (and her +16 deception, and lbr, she's stomping her feelings down like they're so many grapes, and baby she's making wine) making him practically blind to her struggle. (Like. She came up to him for a bit of a cuddle and maybe a "you did well, you couldn't have known, it's okay", and it ended with him screaming "PUUUURE SHIT" into her face? Yeah, after that conversation she likely scurried off to her tent, to have just the tiniest bit of a little cry, nbd, she'll just comfort herself then like she's always done.)

Plus, I like that now there's a genuine reason for him to see her spending more and more time talking to Halsin in a secluded corner of the camp, and for him to get the wrong idea by recognizing that Halsin is not only starting to develop feelings for her that go beyond sexual desire (Halsin definitely doesn't seem to have heart problems over it, I mean "Not what [I want]. Who. But all in due course.", spoken just like that? In front of the gods, and her boyfriend, and Jaheira, and everyone?), but that Halsin would, by all accounts, be a much better partner to her than Astarion himself could ever hope to be at this stage.

(I mean, it's definitely my interpretation of the dialogue, and the whole high elf/wood elf stereotype, that he doesn't like the poly option, but he still doesn't want to be the reason the PC is denied anything they want. I think that's fitting, since at this point, he's still very much in that "I have nothing to offer beyond new burdens to carry" mindset, and I just like covert angsting like that.)

And the kicker is that... he's right. Halsin would objectively be a much better partner to Iona at this stage. He has so much more to offer her, he can help her process things, he can love her freely, please her emotionally as well as physically without issues, she just...

She just doesn't want Halsin. And that's the most important aspect of this whole thing.

Yes, she's sad, frustrated, scared, genuinely just not having a good time of it, and looking for a kind of emotional support that Astarion just cannot provide her (just as he's unloading more on her than she can presently carry, which does leave him kind of emotionally unfulfilled too), but she's made her choice, and for better or worse, she's sticking to it. Because nevertheless, she does love him, specifically, as he loves her. And I definitely like how hard, but ultimately blissful it'll be for him to realize that "this is a hard time and right now neither of us can give the other the support we need" is not chased by "so we should stop pretending this is something it clearly isn't" but by "and I still love you and am choosing you on purpose, warts and all".

a little highlight from the Nautiloid last night, this uh

this thing, it.

it has her face

so she'll probably never be free from that particular nightmare, which is cool

[cosmicakes]

emilia, brant, and dustin

EMILIA:

Full Name: Emilia Olsen.Gender and Sexuality: (t)female, straightPronouns: she/herEthnicity/Species: uh technically she’s half-jotun and half-human.Birthplace and Birthdate: [Insert Name Here], Washington on November 3.Guilty Pleasures: teasing people affectionately. she doesn’t do it often, bc she doesn’t want to allow herself the chance to accidentally make someone mad.Phobias: Fire. It’s literally part of her PTSD.What They Would Be Famous For: She is very famous for being ten feet tall on the astral plane, lmao. All the people in her camp know who she is.What They Would Get Arrested For: Also being ten feet tall on the astral plane. Most people at the camp are quick to distrust her.OC You Ship Them With: Brant and Dustin!OC Most Likely To Murder Them: A character who won’t be shelled: Kolla. It’s short for Kolverja. She’s a hunter of jotun and dragons in the universe she comes from and is one of the reasons Brant hated Emilia at first. (before he found out she was from his universe)Favorite Movie/Book Genre: sci-fi and urban fantasy. Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: sad backstories.Talents and/or Powers: in her universe, she’s good at writing. on the astral plane, her left arm kills people when she touches them; she eventually learns that she can also give life using that arm over the course of the story.Why Someone Might Love Them: she wants to be there for people and she wants to care for people and protect them. also, outside of the astral plane, she gives off irresistible “i need to be protected” vibes that both of her boyfriends can’t resist, lmao.Why Someone Might Hate Them: she’s half-jotun and the daughter of hel, so like. i can see a lot of people not liking her for that reason, given that loki and all of his children have a stigma around them.How They Change: she goes from being closed off (bc of abuse, but still) and uncomfortable in her own skin to being really open and sure of herself.Why I Love Them: I LOVE ALL MY CHILDREN WITH ALL MY HEART. 

DUSTIN:

Full Name: Dustin MerloGender and Sexuality: male, bisexualPronouns: he/himEthnicity/Species: half-vanir, half-human. though, the norse wouldn’t really see a distinction. he’s one of the vanir, period.Birthplace and Birthdate: [Insert Name Here], Washington on April 28.Guilty Pleasures: reading technical manuals for various machinery.Phobias: Death, probably. I can’t think of any for him.What They Would Be Famous For: Either baseball hall of fame or discovering the secrets behind dimensional travel.What They Would Get Arrested For: partying too hardOC You Ship Them With: Brant and Emilia!OC Most Likely To Murder Them: No one. He is perfect.Favorite Movie/Book Genre: textbooks. i’m serious.Least Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: he doesn’t read fiction unless he has to for class.Talents and/or Powers: he is really athletic and also reads a lot, so he’s very smart. (don’t go thinking he’s one of those smarty pants characters, tho. he’s definitely a bro kind of character. the only reason why he’s as smart as he is is because he’s INCREDIBLY gullible and from a young age learned he needed to learn as much as he could to keep from falling for shit.)Why Someone Might Love Them: there’s so much to love. he’s very popular at school because he’s a people person and is fun to be around and is very good at sports. i’m sure he’d attract a crowd that loves his brain, too, if he’d ever allow himself to show off his intelligence around other people.Why Someone Might Hate Them: he has a strict sense of right and wrong and absolutely will not keep quiet if he thinks you’re a piece of shit.How They Change: he goes from being mr. popular to going his own way and hanging out with the people he cares about instead of having to appeal to everyone else around him.Why I Love Them: Okay, I actually have a reason for why I love Dustin so much. And it’s similar to why I love Iona. When I created him I set out to create a character who fit the jock archetype but was also much more analytically minded than you usually see in that archetype. He’s basically both a jock and a nerd and he’s constantly battling with how much of either he wants to give off to the people around him. Does he want to be a know-it-all or does he want to chill out and do stupid shit with his friends while they get drunk at a party? He wants to do both. He has to learn that he can do both if he wants. 

BRANT:

Full Name: Brant GardenerGender and Sexuality: male, a-spec, demiromanticPronouns: he/himEthnicity/Species: half-jotun, half-humanBirthplace and Birthdate: Kent, Washington on December 24.Guilty Pleasures: definitely watching cat videos on the internet.Phobias: that he will hurt the people he cares about.What They Would Be Famous For: Getting into seven consecutive bar fights during a bar crawlWhat They Would Get Arrested For: Getting into seven consecutive bar fights during a bar crawlOC You Ship Them With: Dustin and Emilia!OC Most Likely To Murder Them: None of my OCs would murder Brant, because they all know and love him behind the bad boy facade. like. maybe odin, but he’s not really an OC.Favorite Movie/Book Genre: asa.tru path booksLeast Favorite Movie/Book Cliche: when you know the love interest the second they’re introduced; probably forced romance in generalTalents and/or Powers: in his universe, he’s very agile; on the astral plane he has the ability to shapeshift (though he originally assumes he is just a berserker whose form is a wolf)Why Someone Might Love Them: he’s actually the most empathetic and compassionate character in his and Emilia and Dustin’s story. his eventual life goals are to become a therapist because he wants to help heal people, and his concern for his loved ones and the amount of care he gives makes him loveable.Why Someone Might Hate Them: he is very standoffish and honestly downright rude, and everyone who doesn’t know him probably assumes he hates everyone and everything. he is also prone to fits of violence when he gets triggered. which like. it’s not that he becomes immediately violent. he becomes aggressive when people say/do things that remind him of his mom’s ex-boyfriend, and then he becomes increasingly more aggressive the more the other person responds to his aggression with more aggression. he really only gets violent when he feels threatened and that the other person is going to or is in the process of getting physical, but since no one really knows his story, they assume he just tries to start fights with people for no reason.How They Change: brant is in therapy for his anger, so like. he becomes much less aggressive and more like the boy he actually is inside over the course of the story. he also becomes more open to people. (he’s really standoffish with people at first.)Why I Love Them: I just want my boy to be happy and I want him to overcome the parts of himself he’s ashamed of.  

[pockettprince]

Answers for this thing under the cut! Please feel free to send in more wahh

@alpacastuckee

60:  If you could title your character's life, what would you title it?

Kind of a spoiler but not really: A portion of Bellas life would be titled as “Evangeline” which is when my webcomic takes place! But for their life overall would probably be titled “The Troubles of a Witch” since she faces problems from her mother's family about being a witch and practicing magic.

13: What would your character die for?

Quinn would most definitely die for his family no matter the circumstance. He had his father taken from him in a very gore-like way in front of his own eyes, which made him very clingy when his older brother had taken him into his care. As he grows up so does his family and he loves them with his entire being, the last thing he’d want is for them to be taken from him and he’d sacrifice his own life to ensure that.

14. What is the cutest thing your character has ever done?

Mmmm he’s done a lot of cute things but I’d say the cutest thing is that he likes to handwrite letters to his brother from magic school instead of using phones to face time and all that stuff simply because it feels a bit more personal. That and he also makes handmade cards for his big brother for sibling day/fathers day and holidays!

Anon #1

36: Does anyone want to harm your character?

As of present, no. There was only one person who had the want to physically harm Quinn and that was his mother but she never had the nerve/opportunity to with Quinn under the care of Ceril. Thankfully as well she’s dead so she won’t be able to hurt him ever again.

Anon #2

1: What is your character’s biggest fear?

This is a hard one since I didn’t think about fears w Bella yet, I would say from the top of my head they have a fear of dying alone. It’s kind of ironic since she spent all of her life pushing away people and purposely ruining friendships and such, whether she had a good reason or not. Even in her current life, she isolates herself from people who live around her and keep interaction limited to customers in her store. She doesn’t open up about this until she ends up meeting Aqua, who’s the first person she interacts with closely in a long while.

@lemon-scone​

10: Would your character ever kill someone?

It really depends on the situation honestly? He himself strictly wouldn’t purposely kill nor physically harm someone on purpose, even if he really really hated the person. But if he were to become really emotionally unstable during his adolescence/teen years there's a possibility his magic abilities would spiral out of control and potentially kill someone.

@heartoffawn​

29: What would be your character’s favorite food?

Fresh tomato cannelloni!! Or just pasta with a lot of tomatoes (especially dried) or with tons of cheese!! He really loves pasta w either one of those two or even both because he finds it really yummy.

58: Is your character dorky or more athletic?

He’s definitely dorkier! This kid could ramble on and on about the different types of plants that he’s learned about over the years or even about specific techniques used to cast spells. But that doesn’t mean he’s not active physically, he’s had many accidents in magic school that has built up his stamina and such lol.

50: What is your favorite thing about your character?

Haha oh geez this is gonna be long

Coraline - fashion sense

Avery -  Cinnamon Roll™

Quinn - cute but mischevious, he will set your robes on fire

Clark - he’s an asshole I hate him

Sarah - tall but very shy

Claire - short and will fight you if you mess with her or her wife

Bellatrix - “Aliens are REAL”

Matthew - basic quiet anime boy everyone had a crush on in middle school

Noah - he acts like a spoiled brat but cares for his big brother

Angie - seems weak but she will cut you

Iona - chill 24/7 even when she’s about to die

Sophia - Yass queen

Azael - never did anything wrong to deserve what happened to her but still tries to make the best of it

Betty - she’s like your grandmother, makes you a feast even when you’re not hungry

Abigail - seems calm cool and collected but she doesn't know wtf shes doing

Destiny - Social Anxiety™

Toni - YOLO BRO!!!!11!!!1!

Cynthia - a dad who's trying his best

Athena - the caring mother you’ve never had 

Joan - crityper

Riley - 1 foot tall but will destroy you

Jackie - Teen Anxiety ™

Margo - ?????????????

Alexandra - Hero Complex for life

Isabelle - “Hi my name is Stress and I live off of black coffee”

Micheal - always talks about dying but giving up on everything but never does

Leena - seems stuck up but is secretly a hopeless romantic

Leila - tiny

Nick - asshole #2

Nillin - could kick my ass?

Okay that's kind of more of a “turn your OCs into a shit post” I apologize

[existentialstatesofmind]

Never A Dull Morning

Clare: didn't let boys see her undergarments. Even though she'd starting buying more interesting bras and panties last year, it was for herself not them. Of course Dakota hadn't actually done anything wrong. "It's just private." She explained. "Thank you for understanding." Her cheeks were still pink as she got dressed. Clare wasn't going to explain her weird logic in front of Emi. How she could go without wearing a bra in front of him but wasn't ready for him to see it. Clare was a little shocked after she succesfully beat up Bren. She'd learned how to do that after the whole Fitz threatening her and Eli with a knife incident because it was important to be able to defend herself. Had she gone too far? Bren hadn't actually touched her. Emi was here though and she needed to know it wasn't okay for boys to talk to girls like that even ones who weren't strangers. (Although to Clare, Bren was.) Bren didn't get a free pass. Especially after behaving like that in front of a five year old! He should be ashamed of himself! Besides Clare knew she couldn't hurt Bren badly, she didn't know how to do more than (hopefully) get him to leave her alone from now on. She stepped outside with Kota and slowly breathed in and out trying to calm down. "Is he always like that?" Clare asked. "No problem. I don't want to confuse her. Foreign languages aren't easy for me. I always want to pronounce words exactly how they are written. But in Spanish a J is prounced like an H, in Russian an I is pronounced like an E. So on and so forth. I guess that's why I like French, it's the same alaphabet as English so it's slightly less confusing for me. The difference is the French use diacritics." Clare shrugged. She didn't give up easily and at least she had been right about how to say sushi after all. She felt better by the time they went back inside. Clare smiled at Ash and Emi. "Emi did a good job. He's still down." She knew that wouldn't last much longer so she gladly escaped to the living room with Kota and Emi. Clare sat down on the couch. She bit her lip when Emi asked about purity rings. This was part of the reason why she felt like it was necessary to shut Bren up. Emi didn't need to hear about anything that pretained to sex. Of course she had questions now. Kota was lucky she only asked that one and didn't seem to care that he didn't give her a real answer. Clare winced soon as she heard the name Jenna. Maybe it was a different Jenna? No, soon as Kota got to the part about her trashy short shorts and her purposedly bending over (so everyone could see her buttcrack), Clare knew Dakota was referring to the her former friend. Who stole K.C from her using that exact tactic. He wasn't worth keeping and neither was Jenna's friendship. "I didn't know big mouth already told you all of that before we started hanging out." Clare said softly. "I guess she's still bragging about it. She's been trying to get with every guy since K.C got sick of her. Alli's brother, Sav, turned her down too. She's going to get the baby taken away from her because she won't stay home with him and there's no one else to watch him. I'd feel bad for Jenna but Owen threw my best friend Adam through a glass door for being transgender so...if that's who she wants to be with her baby deserves better." She squeezed Dakota's hand as he confessed to Kelly about his false reputation. Clare knew people might get the wrong idea when they found out she was dating Dakota especially if someone learned about their sleepover(s) but she didn't care. Anyone who mattered wouldn't believe a rumor over the truth. If Jesus Club did to her what they did to her sister, she didn't need to be part of it. However, she hoped they'd changed along with their name. Clare smiled back at him and chuckled because she'd always been able to take care of herself and now she could stand up for herself too. Well, by doing more than slapping boys and making a scene by yelling at them. The other girls at school needed to learn how too instead of relying on Kota to play superman. "I like you just the way you are even if you're reckless. There are some situations you can't get out of alone, she needed a friend." Clare reassurred him after Kelly left. "Just give them the card from now on. Kelly's right. Her dad could've killed you." She shuddered. Clare scooted closer to Dakota when Bren came in. "Do you even realize that was sexual harassment and if you keep doing it, someday a women will press charges against you and you'll go to jail." She said seriously. "You can't grope girls because you like the way we look, just like we can't do it to you. Or each other. Or a guy to another guy." She shook her head. Bren had Genesis all wrong. They were still living with the consequences of Adam and Eve's betrayal. The bible also said that outside of marriage sex was a sin. Even if you didn't believe that, there were other reasons to wait and she didn't plan to do something she'd regret. "Yeah! Let's go after breakfast before it gets too hot. Outside." She frowned. "The only problem is I don't have any exercise clothes here." Clare didn't want to wear her new outfit to the park. She supposed she could make do with what she'd worn over to Kota's in the first place.

Kota: nodded when Clare reassured him after Kelly left and kissed her cheek. "Thank you." he whispered and listened to her chide Bren. He knew that they've been there with him. "Yea, I know. That's why I ask to touch a girl's breasts. They taught me about sexual harassment in school and as long as I don't touch her without permission the most the girl will do is beat the crap out of me. So much easier in Bristol." Bren whined. "Yea, he's got a hard head. He went to Bristol and into a night club where he made a friend. She took a pill, made out with him for about ten minutes, then her boyfriend came and we got a call from the hospital. Bren had to get stitches and had a broken arm. We just sort of gave up after that." he explained to Clare. "The guy had a hard punch, once the girl realized he was beating me up, she called the cops, grabbed him and ran. I'm friends with her on facebook, she asked when I'm going back to Bristol." Bren explained to Clare. "And didn't her boyfriend threaten to kill you if you ever touched her a fourth time since you had to go find her after you go out of the hospital?" Kota asked looking at him. "Yea, but that's just a threat." Bren stated and Kota rolled his eyes. "I wish I could just beat the shit out of you right now, but it'll be futile. I only continued to help because I thought you were done with that girl and could actually change. She's fucking strung out on drugs. That night you were in the hospital she was too, an hour later she tried to kill herself because of the drugs she took. Does that really mean nothing to you, do you not see how much she's calling for help?" Kota asked. "So what she just needs to stop taking whatever drug made her want to die. If she were mine and came to me every night I'd be the happiest man alive regardless if she's strung out or not. They can help the suicide thing." Bren shrugged and Kota got up seeing the headphones still on Emi. "Bren, sex isn't worth your life nor is a girl. Who cares if she got strung out and made out with you, she's fuck-" "I don't care." Bren yelled back and Kota felt a hand on his shoulder to see his mom. "From the first time I held you, I knew you'd be trouble. You acted out more than any of your brothers and never wanted to stay. You were always trying to leave to go wherever, soon that changed and you started going after girls not caring about anyone, but you. I had these papers printed out and money put aside. They're emancipation papers, if you really want this I won't stop you anymore." She said holding his suitcase in hand and he took the papers. "I know you don't care what happens to you, but we do. I think you may need this, to go on your own for a bit and come home to us. Maybe this will help you be a better man." she said as she signed the papers after him and handed him his suitcase and passport. "There's money in there with an address book to friends I've made and keep in touch with in various countries." she said. "And I can be with Iona?" he asked curiously. "This was only an act to be with her?" Kota asked. "Well yea." Bren answered. "If that's what you want." His mom said and Bren took his things and left. "He never unpacked his things. I knew he didn't want to stay." his mom explained and he sat back down. "Maybe this will open his eyes." Kota breathed and laid his head on Clare's shoulder. After she mentioned going to the park after breakfast, he watched as Kelly bought out a plate of pancakes while Dallas carried the plates, Stacy carried sets of silverware wrapped in napkins and Ash and Dom carried sides. Without a word, Kota went to the kitchen and grabbed bottles of juice for everyone, then sat next to Clare and Emi. "Kelly, do you still have those yoga shorts that were too small?" he asked looking at her. "Yea." she answered. "I need them for Clare." He said honestly. "They're in the same place in my room. Also you're on wash duty later after Dallas does the basics. I have Victoria's Secret lingerie that needs to be washed and you're the only one who doesn't shrink them besides Stacy and she has to go home. I also have work." Kelly said and he nodded. "Ok, Stacy do you need your Victoria's Secret lingerie washed?" he asked looking at her. "Yea. Dallas will get them for you when you're ready to do the laundry. Dallas cut some of the tags off mine so that should help a bit. My bras and other items have tags." Stacy explained and he nodded as he ate. "Dom is helping me separate the Victoria's Secret from everything." Dallas stated. "Ash and I will do the dishes then." Stacy stated honestly. "Ok, that leaves Kota and Clare to the floors after dinner." Kelly said. "I wanna help." Emi stated. "We just pick up big items and leave the rest to the roomba." he informed Clare as he continued to eat. After breakfast was done, Kota went and got the shorts for Clare and one of his shirts too. "I'll go change in Dom's bathroom." he smiled at her as he handed her the clothing and kissed her chastely before going to change.

[invinciblerodent]

coincidentally, this penchant for overanalysis that I have also results in me repeatedly reloading certian scenes, just to get alternate lines recorded, and boy does the tiefling party scene i got (the one that doesn't start the romance but continues it) hit me right where I live

((excuse the ranting but i need my thoughts out, if only to reference them later for myself lol.))

like, to the "I love you", I first chose to have Iona respond with (and consider to be more or less her true response) "having fun, are you?".

And that's a good, very Iona thing to say. She called the bluff, but let him know in no uncertain terms that though she knows he's full of shit, she pays it no mind (which is a lie but w/e). He laughed at her dismissal and acknowledged that it was indeed a joke. All was well.

She's free to go and get her widdle feefees bruised thinking about how the idea of loving her being a joke to him kinda sucks. Like really, would it really be so bad. But I'm also free to have him in his feefees about how, if she knows it's a lie and doesn't mind, that must mean that she doesn't care about whether he loves her, no? So, he failed to make her fall for him, so his position as her "lover" is in jeopardy, SO he must redouble the efforts to make her fall for him. But she's all closed off now (because she feels that there's no point to getting herself more invested, it'd only hurt her more when he inevitably gets bored and decides that she's no longer a fun conquest), which only reinforces this sentiment that... she, at this point, doesn't care if he loves her, which is kind of the crux of his whole plan. To give her tiny fractions of inches until she's willing to do anything to get the mile. But if she already got all the inches he has to give (around six of them, at least twice now 👀) and could take or leave the mile, then the whole thing is uuuuuh kinda fucked in the ass. I like that, and I think it creates insecurity and some measure of urgency on both sides. Keeps them both off-balance for now, but for different reasons (that could tbh be solved with a single honest conversation, only they're both just utterly incapable of that at this stage).

BUT it's really interesting how the tone of the entire exchange changes if you either 1. call the bluff but refuse to find it entertaining, or 2. take it at face value.

In scenario no. 1, "you'd be lying", he doesn't backpedal or defend it. He just says that it'd be a beautiful lie: yet again, that to me is the same sentiment as there is in the first romance scene, the "this is what you want, isn't it?" kind of... of almost a benign chastisement. It's an "oh come now, yes, it's a lie, but think about how nice it would be if it were true, wouldn't it?", a call to pretend with him. By refusing to find it entertianing, you reveal that you don't think of these feelings as a joking matter, which in turn is an acknowledgement that they either exist, or that you have at least some investment in whether they exist. Either way, you've "lost". You care if he loves you. And since you keep seeing him, it's clear that you'd prefer if he did, so that's the bait swallowed hook, line, and sinker.

And in no. 2 (or, well, 3 in the order lol), "a little soon to say that, don't you think?", when it sounds like you actually believe him at least to a degree, it's like... he doesn't seem to want to break the illusion because it does benefit him if you take him seriously, but if you believed that he loved you without you loving him yourself, then he'd lose. So he says "it can be true", in a noncommittal, "don't take it too seriously, but keep it in mind as an enticing possibility that it might be true" sort of way. A "well, not quite, but imagine how nice it would be". That's again him with the "winning" hand.

Both these other options just have in common that... the PC is, in some way, genuine. And in an affair between one that is genuine and one that's taking the piss, the genuine one is always at a serious disadvantage: if you're honest in this scene, you either lose, or he wins, and you only really notice that those are the exact same outcome if you squint. The only way you can avoid him winning unequivocally is if you make sure that you both lose.

It's so interesting how much effort he puts into this whole thing but only if the scene is explicitly romantic-inclined. Like in casual conversation it's so clear that he's got it baaaaaaaad. But admitting that feelings exist when we're actually talking about them? Noooooooooooooo.

anyway i can't wait to have these two sopping wet cats finally admit that they care if the other lives or dies and I wrote like three whole pages about them just kissing

it's a really good thing that I'm recording all the scenes I can with Astarion, because it's like I need to listen to everything he says at least three times to get the nuances of what he's actually fucking saying

like. the cutscene that plays when you first pick up a Sussur bloom in the Underdark (I assume if you're a caster of some description? it'd be weird otherwise), you can have this little scene with him, where he says things like "I don't travel with you for your personality, you know" and "the sooner we can get your magic back, the safer we'll be", first I thought "well that's a bit of an uuuuuh how you say.... fucking rude thing to say to someone you're supposed to be halfway in love with already, but aight".

But rewatching it, I'm now also hearing the concern in the first lines ("you look drained" and "is the plant bothering you?"), the immediate call to action that's buried in sarcasm (WE [the group, me included] get your magic back so WE [you] can be safer), and that almost-anxious little "try not to die" at the end. Plus, if to the personality-line you respond with "the feeling is very mutual, my friend", he quite literally tells you that it was a (slightly ill-timed) joke, and that he's glad (relieved?) that you still have your sense of humor.

even though it's likely because he's the second in the party order, it's also not escaping my notice that narratively, in this party, Shadowheart (a fellow caster whose magic was also impacted) was standing right there, but it was still Astarion who kept a close enough eye on my girl to immediately clock that something was wrong. For all they know, she picked up a flower, went pale as a sheet, and he was at her side in like two seconds, well before the only other person with significant enough magic for it to actually matter would have as much as noticed.

you like her, don't you Squidward >w>

[le-petitmort]

Part I – P.S. I’m not a stalker

I’ve seen her hundreds of memorable times before and always wondered if she’d noticed me from afar. In that same sideways glancing, trying to be secretive sort of way I did with her. Which raised the question, was I everywhere like she seemed to be?

Always. In the café window sipping on a latte. The patio of the cute little bistro down the block with the white stringed lights flagging in the cool night air. That corner bookstore with a hardcover open. Not so far that she bent the spine, enough to crack it open and let her mind get lost in words.

I didn’t know a thing about this girl. This ethereal woman always meandering about the neighborhood. Was she an apparition or were those lace topped black stocking that peeked from her stylish dress as she sat alone at a table for two just a figment of my imagination? That is my quandary. So, let me get down to the important facts.

This is Williamsburg, Brooklyn, New York, United States of America. She’s a woman, I’m a man and neither of us know each other. That is a large part of my quandary. My imagination has gone rampant regarding her.

The basics: gorgeous, prone to Parisian style, fond of heels which accent her calves…immaculately I must note, slightly sullen, seemingly forlorn, out of place (for a hipster’s paradise neighborhood), sexy as fuck, did I mention fond of lattes? Always stalking the neighborhood as if she owns it and never seeming to leave.

I’m the guy who could be confused for a hipster. Beard…check. Hair that flops when the humidity hits…check. Unemployed dreamer? Nah…it only seems that way. I have a “job”. One of my own making. One which I’ve worked hard to make profitable. One which I’ll explain later because the details will bore the fuck out of you.

Lately though, it’s seemed this girl…this woman…has become my full-time job. If it appears that I’m obsessive about her, you may be right. Obsessive and compulsive but, not in a bad way, in my mind. More so, an “I think I can mold near perfection to perfection, like wet clay in my hands” kind of way.

With that foremost in mind, I went to work. Not being so daft that I didn’t understand I needed to meet her first. At the very least, speak to her. Which is why this morning was something special, because I knew what time she gets her coffee. P.S. I am not a stalker. I’m smitten, but too shy or maybe too fearful of rejection. Which, come to think of it, is not at all like me. Except this is her, the nameless beautiful woman I’ve passed by a thousand times, and never once took my shot. Too afraid to choke.

Then here we were on a sunny, spring Friday morning, inches apart and waiting to order our coffee. Close enough that I could, as subtly as possible, inhale the floral notes of her perfume and let my imagine run wild about the taste from running my tongue along the length of her clavicle. P.S. I am not a stalker. I just seem like one and even I’m starting to be concerned about my infatuation. Maybe I should pull out on this chance at kismet? Maybe I’m just a big ol’ fucking fraidy cat.

Nope, no backing down. Today is the day.

I listened as she ordered her skinny latte in the sweet and low, purring voice. “Iona.” This was the first time I’d ever heard it. Always having wondered how she sounded. Not exactly the voice of an angel. A little resonant. Sexy as fuck though. A smoky voice. Not like a haggy old lady who’s choked down a lifetime of too many heaters. More youthful, vibrant, somewhat mesmerizing and melodic. Which almost made me forget the task at hand. To finally take my shot.

A plan which at the outset seemed easily accomplished, and now, seemed to be hastily thought out and not at all conceivable. Or it could be I was chickening out. Sack up, man. Fucking A. The plan is the plan, go for it. Which I did.

As she went to the corner to immerse herself in her phone, I took up space in front of the barista. Smiling, small talking, watching as a braided, red faced blonde furiously made drinks behind the counter. Nonchalant and desperately trying to not mess up my chance. Waiting for the drink that was getting skim milk, watching it being poured. Seeing it set on the oak rail before me. Reaching for it as blondie hollered, “Iona”. Making a casual eye turn to see dream girl not moving in my direction. Casually pulling a well prepared note complete with scotch tape from my shirt pocket. Attaching it to Iona’s drink. Grabbing my freshly prepared straight black coffee to rush out the door.

Seriously people, if you thought I was taking the risk of stuttering my way into an introduction with this woman you are sadly mistaken. I needed her to make the first move, with some gentle prodding. After that, all would be good. Quirky, I know.

I’m also certain that you are wondering what the note said. It was simplicity, “I’ve marveled at you from afar” and my phone number. That’s it. No name. No “call me”. Let her take control, just for this one shining moment in the game. If she took the ball and ran with it. If, curiosity got the best of her. If, she called. The biggest if in play.

I hurried home and went to work on my computer. Not even thinking about what I had just done. Out of sight, out of mind, I have work to do and money to make. I somehow have the ability to turn it on and off like that. Only once did I pause to wonder if she would call. So much so, that as I watched the Brooklyn Nets with only the light from the television illuminating the room, I became almost perturbed that my phone began to chime with 3:02 remaining in a three point game. Unknown caller. Fuck it.

At two minutes remaining and a one point game, there was the phone again. I sent it to voicemail. During the next timeout, just as I was about to get up to pace of the closeness of the game, there was the phone again. Unknown caller part three. Goddamnit , I gotta ditch whoever…shit. I hit receive call.

“Hello?”

“I was just wondering what kind of man leaves odd notes on women’s drinks in coffee shops.”

“Oh. That would be me.”

“Marvel at me from afar, huh?” She questioned. “Like a stalker?”

“No. Not like a stalker.” I retorted quickly. “Something different.”

“Something different? What?”

“Let me explain.”

“It better be a doozy of an explanation, mister whatever your name is.”

“It’s Stephen…with a p.”

Ok, Stephen with a P. Explain the note and why I shouldn’t be hanging up.”

“Alright. Here it is. The whole story.”

“Make it quick, I don’t have all night.”

“I’m not normally a loser that leaves notes.”

“What are you, Stephen with a P?”

In a moment of clarity I let it flow. “I’m just a guy. A guy who normally gets what he wants. But, for some reason…if I didn’t get your attention. Well, that would be soul crushing. I’ve seen you nearly daily. Just being you. Maybe I’ve built you up in my head. Put you on a pedestal. Something like that. I’ve come close to approaching so many times. I don’t know. Fear of failure. Whatever.”

“So you’ve seen me and never bothered. Because you might not sweep me off my feet?”

“mhm.”

“So…you figured I’d be intrigued by a note? That I wouldn’t resist curiosity?”

“mhm. Exactly.”

“What made you so sure I’d respond?”

“I wasn’t.”

“Do I know you Stephen with a P?”

“No.”

“What do you look like? Would I know you if I saw you?”

“I don’t know. Tall…beard…”

That’s every guy in this neighborhood Stephen with a P.”

Yeah, I know. Pretty much.”

“So give me a little more something. It’s obvious that if you’ve seen me. If you’ve noticed me. I’ve noticed you. Right?”

“Maybe. Well...I was standing behind you at the coffee shop this morning. There is that.”

It was a stunning moment of clarity. A seemingly interminable pause on the other end of the line. Then a rushed response.

“I’ve marveled at you from afar, as well.” Click. The phone went dead, right as the final buzzer of the Nets game blared from my tv. It was a comeback win and my smile was bigger than ever.

-bart 4.13.2019

Photo: Aaron Crossman