#interactions | sebastian randolph.

[pinkpcny]

“ you’re wrong, actually. i’d never refer to you as my dirty little secret because that would imply that you’re actually something worth keeping, wouldn’t it ? ”

[pinkpcny]

sebastian stiffens, cast back in time in his mind. remembers how suddenly things turned bleak after her departure. like perhaps she was the one person keeping him humble, sane in a world where everyone else either looked right through him, or only saw his wealth. truthfully, at that point in his life he'd never felt more alone. but he isn't about to put that on her, not when he knows the way she would have been feeling must have been magnified by thousands. there was little love between he and his own mother, but if she were to pass he's certain he'd feel an incurable ache. " i was fine, " he insists, shakes his head. isn't quite sure how to react to her affectionate touch. " i don't know, anna, " admission is quiet as he glances across at her, uncertainty behind his gaze, " i'm not so sure you'll like the person i've become. " because he isn't so sure he likes himself.

"that sounds great," lyanna finds herself nodding in agreement, a faint smile on her petals. she almost envies how easy it is for him, how everything so seems so effortless and certain. she'd grown up in wealth too, maybe not in as much as he had, but money had never really been a problem — until her father was arrested and their trust funds were frozen. the sudden shift from luxury to uncertainty had left her reeling, and even now, she struggled to find her footing. " i do, though. " or at least, it felt like she did. " for leaving you the way i did, for not saying goodbye," deep down, she knows she would have never been able to leave if she had, but she assumes that her absence has hurt him deeply. just as his presence had been her anchor, she knew she had been a significant part of his world. "i'm sorry i wasn't there when you needed me." she adds, slender fingers hesitantly reaching for his larger palm. "i'm here now, though. even if things can never be the same again, it doesn't mean they can't be better. right ? "

[pinkpcny]

" let's get one thing clear, me helping you in a moment of need in no way means i possess any genuine care for you. understand ? " / @dogsrotten

[pinkpcny]

closed @littlcfreaks | warren ft. sebastian.

warren randolph was always on top form, always knew when and how to turn on the charm in order for his own gain. some might say it was a skill passed down from his father, though in reality it seemed to be a natural gift. he's spent the majority of his evening schmoozing the daughter of their next big investor, an attempt to seal the deal. there was, however, a slight distraction in the form of sebastian. with every laugh or touch he got from the female, he couldn't help but to cast his gaze towards the other male, darkened eyes and ever-permanent smirk fixed firmly in place. he takes the chance to excuse himself when more people begin to gather, makes his way over to the other male with two drinks in hand, passing sebastian one. “ having fun ? ” he questions, makes a mental note of how good the other looks.

[pinkpcny]

jealousy was no thing he'd ever admit to, but there's been a number of times he's felt it in his life. feels it every time he's at family dinner and his father spends the entirety of it praising his older brother, or treating his sister like she's the salt of the earth even when she shows her blatant disgust toward him. then there he is, often sat there with little to no acknowledgment at all. and he feels it now, too. in the way she refuses to look at him even though she's been stuck to someone else's side all evening. knows he shouldn't care, not when he'd been the one to end it and she has ever right to look elsewhere. but it's burning bring, a vibrant green despite the cool blue of his eyes. " when it comes to you, no, i haven't. " such a bold thing to say all things considered, but it's true. " don't tell me he's bored you so badly you've resorted to reading at a party, " lips quirk, finger reaching out to tip her phone into view. " dance with me, " he insists, doing his best to catch her gaze.

ivy hated to admit it, especially at such a decked out party, but she was bored. the only reason she was even invited was because one of sebastian’s friends texted her a pity invite. as nice as its been to have someone to give her undivided attention, she missed how intense things were with sebastian. she felt toxic — she knew wanting him back was a stupid, stupid idea. which was exactly why ivy spent the night actively avoiding sebastian. she figured that the less interactions they had, the better. she tried to keep her date close. when he had to use the bathroom, he insisted that ivy stay and enjoy herself. that was fifteen minutes ago, so he was either waiting in line for a long time or he got distracted. ivy pulls out her phone, sneakily opening her kindle app when she feels someone approach her. she hears sebastian’s voice beside her, willing herself not to look up at him. she continues to scroll, her voice even as she speaks. “have you considered minding your own business, sebastian? like, ever?” she taps her phone, flipping a page in her book as she takes a sip of her drink.

[pinkpcny]

────── time skip : it'd been weeks since the last time he saw her, and the most infuriating part is that she hasn't let his mind. he'd convinced himself that pushing her away would somehow makes his feelings disappear in an instant, only to be confronted with the fact that it's not that simple this time. now here he is at some party hosted by someone he doesn't even like all that much, but if there's alcohol and drugs he can usually be found there. tonight, however, they do little to capture his attention. too focused on her, and on the man that seems to be following her around like a lost puppy. it shouldn't bother him, but it does. so much so that the instant he spots her alone, he wastes no time in invading her space. " it's only been a few weeks ivy, i thought you might have waited a little longer than that to lower your standards so drastically. "

ivy felt like she’d been slapped, like his words were arrows and she was the only target. did she really think he’d develop feelings? yes, she did. everything was solid between them, they were having a blast together. why did he have to ruin it when it was going so well? he was clearly scared of how he felt. she wasn’t going to yank his emotions out of him. he was an adult. if he wanted to talk about how he felt, he would. she was smarter than this. she knew men like sebastian, was certain that she’d never fix him — no matter how strong the urge to try was. she didn’t want to walk away from him but after his final words, she knew she couldn’t stay either. “whatever.” she spoke quietly, brushing past him without another word. as she left, she resisted the urge to turn back, to shake him out of his own head.

[pinkpcny]

" then i'll book it. we can take the private yet. " one of many, the perks of an esteemed family of abundance wealth. he's all too aware that people would kill to be in his shoes, yet there's still an emptiness inside of him that no amount of money could ever fill. her words cause brows to furrow in confusion, gaze behind sunshades slightly saddened. " your mother died, lyanna . . . there's no world in which you owe me an apology for needing to get away. " had he felt the impact of her departure ? yes. had losing her, to a small degree, allowed him to spiral further ? yes. was any of that at all her fault ? absolutely not. " what do you mean it wasn't about me ? " tone teasing, conceals the lump that threatens to form in his throat. " i thought everything was about me. " it's an attempt to joke, lighten the mood, maybe even make her smile. quickly he glances away, not so great with the deep conversations these days. once upon a time they'd been easy, not they feel like glass in his throat. " you did what you had to do. i understand. "

lyanna tilted her head, considering his suggestion with a small smile. "yurks and caicos does sound lovely," she replied softly, her thoughts momentarily drifting to images of pristine beaches and azure waters. "it's been ages since i've left the country." the blonde is more than grateful for the suggestion, her best friend had always known how to lift her spirits. as silence settles between the pair, she lets out a soft sigh. " i know i never really apologized for leaving the way i did, but i am sorry. " she points out, piercing blue hues focusing on the ocean ahead. " i needed time, time to figure out things on my own. " her gaze flickered back to him, searching the familiar features for understanding. " i hope you know it wasn't about you. i just … i needed to find a way to deal with everything that happened. " she paused, her voice wavering. " and i suppose i'm still figuring it out, every day. "

[pinkpcny]

it's a family trait, or so it would appear. toxic masculinity seems to be the apple that doesn't fall too far from the tree when it comes to the men of the randolph bloodline. he's watched for years as his father cheated on his mother, and she turned a blind eye only because she enjoyed the privilege his money brought. his elder brother warren, well he was all too happy to treat people like puppets on a string. for sebastian, well, it's more a case of protecting himself. never letting anyone close enough to see that he's nothing more than a failure, never quite living up to expectation and getting by on daddy's money. keeps his practised arrogant smile in place, so used to playing the role he's practically become it. " well, that was a mistake on your part, wasn't it ? you should know by now that every rumour holds some element of truth. i'm young, ivy. filthy fucking rich. did you really think i'd let myself develop feelings ? i don't need anything holding me back. especially not you. so go. now. "

ivy cocks her head, more confused about his behavior than hurt by his words. she knows herself well — well enough that she knew she looked far from desperate. not when he'd been the one to chase her. she felt foolish, as though she should've heeded her friends warnings. "i was so banking on all those rumors about you being bogus. you know the ones. about how you make all these promises to girls just to toss them aside a few months later?" ivy took a step closer, tilting her head up at the other. "we were having fun, seb. why'd you have to go all brooding toxic masculinity man on me?"

[pinkpcny]

he remembers her loss, remembers how desperately he wished he could take the pain away, bring her ease. can’t remember any other time in his life he’s cared that deeply about someone. thinks that maybe once she left that’s when the last hopeful parts of his did too. these days he’s a lot more selfish. lives lavishly, foolishly … surrounds himself with fake friends who feed his ego. isn’t quite sure who he is, if he’s being honest with himself. though he rarely ever is. “ where would you like to go ? i hear turks and caicos has some pretty breathtaking beaches. ” truthfully he hasn’t taken a vacation simply to relax in a while. each one has been party-fuelled. a slower pace may be exactly what he needs.

lyanna's smile faltered a little at her friend's words, sapphire hues glancing at the horizon ahead as she thought them over. that was the thing, she wasn't sure she'd ever want to come back to this place. it was filled with memories that pulled at her heartstrings, reminding her of a time when life felt simpler when decisions didn't weigh so heavily on her mind. "it would never be the same again," the blonde murmured, burying her fingers in the sand. " it's not that i don't cherish the memories, because i do. it's just that … coming back here, it's like reopening a chapter of my life that i've been trying so hard to move past." her gaze drifted back to the waves. "you're right, though. new beaches and new memories do sound wonderful. just you and me, like old times."

[pinkpcny]

hums, slight smirk upon his lips. amused by the roll of her eyes. lights a spark behind his eyes. " so i've been told at least a few hundred times. " this is what he does, time and time again. cuts things off before anyone has the chance to get too close. " are you still lingering, ivy ? it's making you look a little desperate. "

"you're a fucking asshole, you know that?" ivy scoffs, rolling her eyes. "let's just our losses and go on with our lives then, shall we?"

[pinkpcny]

head ached with a familiar pounding, hangovers almost a constant state these days. but he'd shown up, shades on to shield his eyes from the burning sun, grateful for the slight breeze upon his skin. hummed in response, flashbacks playing in his mind. they seemed like a lifetime ago. but moments shared here with her had be some of the most relieving of his life. wealth in abundance in no way meant a happy home life, and as a youngster any chance he had to get away, he'd take. " it didn't go anywhere, it's still here. waiting for you whenever you want to come back. " wasn't entirely sure if he was referring to the beach, or himself. perhaps both. " no. life is about moving forward, finding new beaches. making new memories. maybe we could go somewhere a little more exotic next. "

@wasteddawns sent 🎲 for a randomized started based on this. ♥

the rhythmic cadence of waves kissing the shore filled the air, blending seamlessly with the laughter of children chasing seagulls along the sun-kissed beach. it was like a melody to lyanna's ears, always had been. "remember when we thought feeding seagulls was a good idea? " the blonde questioned the figure sitting beside her, a smile on her petals. he was more than a friend; he had been a constant in her life, been there for here for as long as she could remember. he'd witnessed everything, from birthdays and joyful celebrations to her mother's passing. " i miss this place so much." how many days they had wandered this very beach, building sea castles and sharing secrets until the sun set below the horizon. so much had changed since then too. " do you ever wish we could just go back ? "

[pinkpcny]

he liked to think that if the roles were reversed, he'd be completely unphased. but there was never any denying the fact that he wanted sebastian. commitment to people had never been a strong suit of his, the reasons not to often outweighing any logical reason as to why something could work. truthfully, he may have been too devoted to his work to give enough time to anything — or anyone else. " no one needs to say it. it's obvious. oozes right out of you. " warren thrives on the small noises the other makes, the way he seems to desire closeness even when barley retreats. it makes him want to leave the event right then and there, and he would if he wasn't due to give a speech later in the evening. that was perhaps how he knew that there was something there that was more than physical attraction. when it came to sebastian, there was often moments of consideration, fleeting thoughts of what if. warren randolph had never cared deeply for anyone other than himself. but sebastian, unknowingly, threatened to dig out a hole in his armour and find an part of him he often deemed to be unreachable. he takes another sip of his drink, brow raising. " let me ? " warren can't help but to chuckle, shaking his head as he reaches out again, takes the other males chin between his finger and thumb. " come on, we both know it's all you're thinking about. in fact, i'm sure by the end of the night you'll be begging to get into my bed. " the pad of his thumb then moves to trace along sebastian's bottom lip, and he has to fight every temptation to grab him by the hand and lead him somewhere more private. he's almost certain by this point that they've gained at least a little attention, the lust behind his gaze undeniable. but he doesn't care. is focused on the other male and no one else. " but don't worry, baby, there's a spot there just for you. i'll even have the chef prepare you breakfast. "

too much of sebastian's life had been following after warren, chasing after his attention - much of it hadn't been understood by even himself. he spent so long insisting that he was nothing more than a friend that at some point he had started to believe it; at least until the reality had hit him over the head, making it seem so clear that he had practically been in love with him for as long as they had known each other. but because they had been friends, sebastian was more than aware of who warren was and more importantly, he was well aware of who he was - so how could he have any expectations? still, he couldn't help but be jealous. he hated when he wasn't the one on warren's arm, hated when warren's attention was elsewhere - so much so that he had started to avoid events where warren was sure to be preoccupied; this one had been unavoidable, his father insisting that he come. and just like that - sebastian was having to force back a smile, replacing it with a soft, practiced pout, "who said i was jealous?" warren's next moves take him by surprise, a soft noise escaping his lips and getting lost in warren's mouth as their lips press together - more than anything he's grateful for the momentary reminder that he isn't the only one who wishes they were together in some way. sebastian tilts towards warren as he pulls away - desperate to not lose warren's touch, his eyes still closed as his lips pull into a lazy smile, "who says i'll let you take me home?" but he had already planned to wake up in warren's bed the next morning.