#inspiration strikes hard when i don't have to come up with most of the story! ;D

[britishchick09]

it's finally happened... after just over a year and a half, i finished the rewrite! :D

[theunbearableweightofpedropascal]

Best Friend's Brother

Will Miller x f!reader

Warnings: (infidelity, possible unlikeable reader/Will, fingering, p in v, creampie, no safe sex, dirty talk, cursing)

A/N: Don't mind most of my smut wear condoms. Also I needed more Will fics out there.

Summary: With enough liquid courage you tell your best friend's brother exactly how you feel about his fiance.

Word Count: 4.3K

“You know if you interacted with anybody here you wouldn’t have to read so many romance books.” Benny’s breath tickles your ear as your eyes are glued to the words on your phone screen. Your favorite author surprise dropped a new chapter and you retreated from conversation to read it.

“After I finish this chapter.” You barely pay any mind to your best friend. 

“You said that 10 minutes ago.” For such a large man Benny has a talent for sounding like a whiney child when he wants. 

You heave a deep sigh before placing your phone on the table. The moment your irritated eyes land on Benny he sheepishly slides two whiskey shots in front of you. Internally you’re already gagging but you shoot them back and grimace at the burning in your chest. The warm air of the bar did little to help the heat flourishing through your body. 

“You couldn’t have grabbed me a soda.” Temporarily a frown is etched on your face until the bitter taste goes away. 

“I drank it while you were reading.” His answer makes your head snap to him but before you could respond he abruptly stands. “Will!” His booming voice does little to disturb the patrons around you, but the name he calls makes the hair on your body stand up. 

The two golden boys meet in the middle to hug each other and you try to calm your overactive mind. You could say you’ve had a lingering attraction to the older Miller brother, though it would be downplaying the amount of times you’ve thought about him. 

When you first met Benny his brother was already away so you only knew him through the stories Benny would tell. From the way he described his brother, you thought he was too good to be true. But when you met him you were proven wrong, and soon you were under his spell. 

“Hey, Buttercup.” Your thoughts halt when you feel Will’s hands squeeze your shoulders before taking the seat to your left. His nickname for you never failed to warm your cheeks, even if technically he had a fiance.

“Hi Will,” The cheery tone of your voice causes Benny to roll his eyes at your abrupt change of mood. You never brought up how you felt about his brother but it wasn’t hard for him to put together the pieces. 

Benny checks his phone before telling the both of you he’s getting more drinks for when Santi and Frankie arrive. 

“How’s the book going?” You playfully roll your eyes at the mention of your pipe dream from when you were 19. 

“Still on page 3, inspiration has yet to strike.” His smile makes your heart beat so heavily in your chest you think he can see it. 

“Hard to believe that,”  His hands grab at the half-cold fries on your plate. “What genre are pushing for anyway?”

“Most likely historical romance,” The whiskey shots settle and you feel your body become lighter. “The old-timey English is hard to get into though.” 

“Coming from the walking encyclopedia.” His words are slightly muffled by the fries he’s shoveling into his mouth. 

“What’d we miss?” Santiago’s voice cuts through your conversation and you look up to find him and Frankie occupying the seats in front of you. 

“Not much Benny’s getting the drinks.” Will rubs his hands on his jeans to rid his hands of grease. 

As usual, the men around you dive into sports commentary as if they’re the analysts they watch on TV. In the meantime, you skim over the food menu trying to figure out what else you want. With two more people at the table, the heat from Will’s arm brushing against you makes you lean closer to him. If he felt the difference he didn’t let anything on. 

Two pitchers of beer slosh against the plastic as it's being set down before a flight of whiskey is placed directly in front of you. An eager smile graces Benny’s face and you know exactly how this night is gonna go. As the two of you go shot for shot the three veterans look at you both in amusement. 

“How’s the wedding planning going?” Santiago smiled as he nudged Will

“It’s going,” Despite his lack of answer the way he feels is written all over his face, and everyone at the table knows it. 

“It can’t be that bad man.” Frankie tries to give the benefit of the doubt but he unknowingly releases the floodgates.

“She told her family to send pictures of what they were gonna wear to the ceremony,” Will gulps the rest of his beer before continuing, “Then she proceeded to veto her grandmother’s peach pantsuit because it was too close to white.”

Everybody has variants of shock written on their face except you, though your reasons may have more to do with animosity. Melody, his fiance, had first been introduced two years ago. From the start, you could tell they weren’t right for each other, but your mouth remained shut until Benny brought it up. 

Leave it to your best friend to be the one feeding into your delusions. 

“And don’t get me started on the flower girl fight, she had both her sisters send test shots of their daughters.” You adamantly aim to keep your mouth shut, knowing the liquor has loosened your lips. The last thing you wanna do is rattle down the long list of reasons you don’t like his fiance, namely because she’s his fiance. 

“You sure know how to pick em’ Ironhead.” Santiago whistles while he thinks of all his previous relationships. 

“Maybe it’s just the wedding.” His tone was even but laced with something like doubt. 

“Maybe it’s a glimpse into your future.” Benny tries to bring the lighthearted energy back by wiggling his fingers and mimicking a ghost. 

A smile cracks Ironhead’s exterior at his little brother’s antics. 

“Drinks anyone?” You look around the table watching them nod in agreement before taking off to the bar. 

The counter is busy when you approach so you take the time to go over what you want. Two pitchers of beer and two Long Island iced teas. A hand connecting with your lower back causes you to swivel your head to accost the perpetrator, only to find Will. Relief floods through you but not for long.

“You’ve been quiet all night, it’s not like you.” Will leans his other arm over the bar, caging you in. 

“Your brother’s been force-feeding my shots all night what’d you expect.” You hope you can stir him away with humor but he knows better and so should you. 

“What do you think? Am I setting myself up for failure again?” The sincerity in his voice pulls at your heartstrings. You know how he feels about this being his second engagement and nobody could blame him for wanting to be sure. 

“Look if you’re happy what does it matter what those idiots are talking about?” Will’s eyes narrow and you give in to the voices in your head. “Honestly, she’s always lacked valuable character traits.” You avoid eye contact with the man next to you as you flag down a bartender to give the order. 

“Why didn’t you say anything before?” His blue eyes bore into yours and you find your eyes lowering to his lips. 

“And how exactly am I supposed to bring that up in conversation?” Your conversation ceases for now as the bartender places your drinks in front of you. 

A silence falls over the both of you even after you return to the table. Thankfully none of the other guys notice you averting your eyes from Will’s direction. 

……………

All Will could think about was what you said. 

Sure he noticed how self-centered Mel could be but it didn’t bother him because he had his fair share of baggage. Even when the guys were making their jokes about how she acted on a camping trip, he didn’t care. Yet the moment you opened your mouth he couldn’t shake the feeling that this engagement wasn’t right either. 

For the past hour, he’s been looking your way, hoping to catch your eye, but you purposefully avoid it. He watches you engage with everyone else until you feel his gaze burning and return to sipping on your drink. 

He checks his phone only to find a string of complaints from Mel. 

“I should get going.” Will reaches for his wallet and places enough bills down for the tab and tip. Much to the dismay of everyone else at the table. 

“We’re supposed to be treating you man.” Frankie scrambles to get his wallet but Will waves him off with a charming smile. 

“Next time.” He promises.

“We should probably head out too.” You peer over at Benny with pouty lips 

“I can take you.” William wastes no time volunteering to get you alone, he’s never been one to squander an opportunity. 

For the first time in an hour you look up at him and he can see the panic swimming in your eyes. You want to object but that would look suspicious so you nod your head and gather your things. Each of the guys hugs you goodbye before Will’s hand finds its way back to your lower back to guide you through the crowd. 

You know it’s a friendly touch still, excitement swirls within you.

Outside the bar is just as crowded so Will’s hands remain on you. In fact, he slides his right hand around your waist to bring you closer to him. People walking past would assume the two of you were together the way you were glued to each other. 

“When you said she lacked character traits, which specifically do you mean?” Will’s rough voice shocked you with how close it was to your ear. 

“This feels like a trap.” You look up at him with suspicion. 

“It’s not, I promise.” He laughs at your hesitance, “You’ve just never said anything and if you had…” He drops his sentence but you know what he’s implying. 

“You really care about what Benny’s best friend thinks?” You jab his stomach with your elbow.

“You know you mean more than that to me.” He leaves no room for argument and you’re left speechless at his side. 

You take a moment to digest his words because it isn’t the first time he’s said them, but it feels like it. 

“Sometimes it feels like you care more for her than she does you.” Your voice is quiet. “And it’s not like I would be telling you out of the purest intentions.” The words leave your lips before you think better of it. 

“What intention would you have?” You realize too late that he’s slowed the pace and now you’re standing face to face. 

“For you to break up with her.” You see no point in lying, and it’s not like you’re the only one who feels that way.

“And that’s it?” Will looks down at you like you're his prey. Clearly, he already knows the answer.

“Mhmm.” You lied. “How away far is your car?” 

“It’s right there.” He tips his head in the direction of his truck but his eyes and body don’t move from you. 

After a few seconds, you turn to make your way to the car but Will’s hand prevents you from leaving your spot. 

“Is that all you’d want me to do? Leave her?” That gruff voice is going straight is going straight down to your core. 

“No.” Your eyes are glued to the ground. 

For now, your answer seems good enough because he pulls you back into him for the remaining three feet to the car. He opens the passenger door for you and you take a short reprieve to gather yourself. 

Of course, Will could read how desperate you were for him. Dread settled in the bottom of your stomach when you think of how awkward this ride is gonna be.

“Look I’m sorry, here I am criticizing Melody for her character-” You spew out your thoughts hoping to do damage control. 

“I’m not upset Buttercup, when the guy's rib on Mel’s antics it’s one thing but when you say it…” He plays with the scruff on his chin before continuing, “Santiago has yet to be in a serious relationship, Frankie is working his way back from the doghouse, and Benny is Benny.” 

Your giggle rings through the truck's cabin despite the tense atmosphere and Will can’t help but join you. 

“Seriously, I’m no better especially since I want to be in her position.” Your eyes are focused on your lap but you almost feel the wind from Will’s head craning towards you. 

“You what?!” Based on his tone of voice he didn’t know that tidbit and you were the one to give yourself away. 

“Shit.” You clasp your hands over your face as you feel the car pull to a stop.

“What do you mean you want to be in her position?” The fact that he softened his voice made this the stuff of nightmares. 

“I think it’s pretty self-explanatory William.” You deadpan without bothering to look up.

“Indulge me.” You remove your hand from your face but keep your eyes locked in front of you. 

You make sure he can see your eyes roll before you continue, “She’s worried about how everything’ll look to other people but if I were the one marrying you the only thing I’d be worried about is how much lingerie I could reasonably pack for the honeymoon.” 

“How long?” The thought of your words causes pools of blood to gather below his waist. “How long have you felt this way?”

“Since I met you.” You say matter-of-factly. “I thought it was just a crush but it progressed over the years.” 

“Why didn’t you or Benny say anything?” Will’s upper body almost completely faces you. 

“Are you saying you would’ve been receptive?” You ask the question but you already have an inkling of what he’ll say.

“I don’t know-” Will feels like the rug was swept out from underneath him. He’d already had doubts but he was willing to settle, at least before you opened your mouth. 

“Exactly.” You don’t let him finish in the hopes that he’ll pull back onto the road. 

“To be fair I have a decade on you so legally speaking, it’s a little touchy.” Of all the times he graced you with his humor it was not appreciated right now. 

“More like a decade and a half but okay.” Despite yourself, you smile while his drops at your statement. 

“And yet that didn’t deter you.” Suddenly the cab feels small and you don’t know when but the two of you got closer. 

“That’s because I never said it was a bad thing.” Your voice is barely above a whisper.

Tonight you were full of surprises. Will thought he knew everything there was to know about you but he hadn’t seen this side of you. Your blown-out pupils and plump lips call out to him like a siren’s song. The faint scent of whiskey and strawberry chapstick wafts his way. Intoxicating is the only way to describe how you’re making him feel because the beers he had did nothing. 

He doesn’t register his hand reaching out to rub his thumb along your bottom lip. The moment you wrap your lips around his thumb and suck he loses every thought.

Will removes his thumb only to replace it with his lips. It doesn’t take long for you to kiss him back with even more vigor, this was your chance and it wouldn’t go to waste. You feel your bottom lip being sucked into his mouth but somehow he isn’t close enough. Your hands find their way to the back of his neck, bringing him closer while you tilt your head.

Your soft hands feel almost ticklish on the back of his neck and a deep groan passes his lips. 

Will reaches out to your waist, pulling you closer until he feels your tits pressed against his chest. You make the lust-filled decision to swing your knee onto his other side and sit on his lap. The denim skirt you’re wearing rides up, almost showing him your panties.

A gasp escapes your lips when you feel what you thought was Will’s zipper. One look at his smirking face tells you you’re mistaken.

“Is that-” Your eyes zero in on where the two of you meet. 

“Mhmm,” Will confirms your dream and arousal bubbles in your core. Before you can say anything he rolls his hips perfectly hitting your clit in just the right spot. 

The sound that leaves your body is a culmination of all the years you’ve spent yearning for him, for a moment like this. You’ve never felt more desperate in your life. Quickly you lay your head in the crook of his neck and rock your hips back and forth. Your hands find themselves squeezing his biceps for purchase. 

All of your breathless pants make him throb with need, as good as you feel like this he wants it all. Will inches his hand up your inner thigh, planting himself on your moving hips. 

“Buttercup?” Will talks to you like he’s rousing you from sleep.

“Hm?” He watches you focus with your eyebrows furrowed and your bottom lip jutted out, there’s no better view. 

“Want you to sit on it.” He can tell when you register his words because of the decline of your movement.

In all of five seconds, you’re clawing at his pants and all he can do is look at you. There’s no denying you’re gorgeous, sweet, funny. Now that he thinks about it he did care a little more for you than he should. Hell, sometimes you would go to him before Benny and he always felt great when he could problem-solve for you. 

While he had been staring at you and daydreaming you managed to pull him out of his pants. If he thought your hands felt good before they feel even better now that they were stroking him. 

“You’re so big Will.” Even your fantasies couldn’t live up to the real thing.

“Yeah?” Will rubs over your wet fold through your panties, “You’re gonna be a good girl and take it for me right?” He slides your panties to the side before teasing your entrance with his middle finger. 

“Whatever you want.” And you meant every word. 

He barely has his finger in and you’re already clenching around him. With your hands now on his shoulders, you impatiently rock your hips showing him you’re ready. Will groans when he feels your warm walls clenching on his finger. He takes his other hand to your chin to bring you closer before telling you, “You’re perfect.”

Before you fully realize what he said he adds another finger to your aching core. Your eyes meet his almost pitch-black ones, and again you feel like his prey the way they bore into his. When he curls his fingers inside you you involuntary buck your hips for more. 

You wonder if you’ll leave bruises the way your fingers dig into Will’s shoulders. Suddenly his lips are on yours in a bruising kiss, his teeth slightly rub against yours before he deepens it. Dizziness fills your head from the way his fingers pumped into you to his warm tongue licking into your mouth.

You were ruined for anyone else after him. 

The sounds in the truck consist of heavy breathing, moans, and squelching. A pit formed in your lower stomach and you felt like you were falling in it. You feel too much at once and you feel yourself pulling away from the kiss to calm down but Will moves to your neck. As he sucks and licks at your neck his fingers expertly pull you over the edge. 

You would’ve fallen against the wheel if he hadn’t held you in his arms. He rubs his hands over your back until you come to. Somehow your orgasm felt like a shot of espresso and you’re right back on Will. 

Without pause you sink down on his leaking tip and slowly inch him deeper. You watch his face while you do it and you almost miss his blue eyes, but he looks so much more hypnotizing. You couldn’t look away and neither could he. 

Will couldn’t imagine his night would end up like this, not that he was complaining. 

With you finally taking all of him you let out the airiest sigh before rocking your hips. Your knees were burning from the seats but you couldn’t bring yourself to stop. Will’s hands move down your back to grip your ass while you rock and bounce on him. 

“Fuck,” He is the first to break eye contact but only to look at where the two of you meet. Your juices leave a ring on his dick and he almost cums at the sight. “I can’t wait to taste you next time.”

“Next time?” You try slowing your hips to comprehend what he just said but he picks up your slack. With his hips rutting into yours from below the pleasure must be clouding your brain to imagine things. 

“You thought I was gonna let you go after this baby?” An unforgiving pace brings that familiar pit in your stomach that has you pawing at his covered chest. “You know me better than that Buttercup.”

Will’s hips sputter before you hear a guttural groan and warmth being shot into you. Even as he’s cumming he uses his hand to urge you to rock your hips against him. When everything slows to a halt all that’s left is heavy breathing from the both of you. 

“Did you mean it?” You bring yourself to ask as you fiddle with your fingers 

Will lifts his head from the headrest to look at you, “Of course I mean it.”

“You know you still have a fiance right?” 

“You didn’t have to put off by that a few minutes ago,” His playful grin lets you know he’s only messing with you. “Seriously though it wouldn’t have lasted, I just didn’t think anybody else would want me.” 

“I mean you make it easy.” You haven’t looked up at him yet.

“You’re one to talk.” Will tilts his head before giving you a kiss. “Let’s get you home.” Heat fills your face at his charm.

With a hiss, he slowly helps to lift you off his now softening dick. You’re quick to move your panties back in place before any of his cum drips out. He tucks himself into himself back into his pants.

Before he even turns on the car you’re lying across the the front seat and nodding off. He takes the jacket he always keeps in his car behind the seat and drapes it over you.

He takes a look at his phone and sees missed calls from everyone. It’s almost 3 in the morning and Will winces as he looks at the messages asking him where he is. Instead of staying here for another hour, he heads in the direction of your condo. 

Your porch light is on when he pulls into the driveway in front of your house. One look over at you and he can see that you’re dead to the world so he searches for your purse. When he finds your keys he runs to open the door before circling back to pick you up. 

Once in the house, he kicks the door closed then locks it. He already knows the way to your room since he basically set it up for you. In fact he moved most of your furniture for you, not wanting moving companies to take advantage of you. 

Your room has clothes strewn on the floor in what looks like failed outfits you tried on. A laugh escapes Will when he realizes you ended up wearing a short jean skirt with a v-neck. It’s only two steps to the bed and he lays you down gently not wanting to wake you. 

He tries replacing the jacket over you but your fingers have gripped it so he settles on laying the comforter over you. When he’s sure you’re settled he rounds your bed to sit on the other side, unlacing his boots. After that are his shoes socks, jeans, and shirt. 

A relaxed sigh is let out the moment his back hits your bed. Although it makes no sense to cuddle, he saddles his body close to yours. 

Bacon and potatoes infiltrate your nose the more awake you become. Last night quickly flashes through your mind as if your brain urged you to remember. Your room is exactly how you left it and the thought of Will seeing it sends shame through your body. Of the discarded clothes you pick up some lounge shorts to throw on. 

Your hunger overpowers your drowsiness so you make your way to the kitchen. Will’s naked back is a welcomed sight anytime. 

“Good morning.” He grins when you make an appearance next to him. 

“Morning Buttercup.” The spatula he’s using to stir potatoes is cast aside so he can run rub circles on your lower back. 

Now that the afterglow faded you wondered what direction this is heading in. 

“I ended things with Mel this morning, she’s pissed to say the least.”

“I didn’t plan for this to happen.” Guilt creeps into you now that your chickens have come home to roost

“I know, but I’m glad it happened.” Without waiting for your reply he's back to cooking like our conversation never happened. “You can sit down if you want it’ll only be five more minutes.”

The debrief call with Benny will be one for the books.

[seelestia]

— ❝𝐎𝐇 𝐌𝐘 𝐆𝐎𝐒𝐇, 𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐓𝐄𝐑𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 𝐌𝐘 𝐃𝐑𝐄𝐀𝐌 𝐏𝐄𝐑𝐒𝐎𝐍!❞

SUMMARY. "oh my gosh, you're literally my dream person!" here's a list of red flags for you, honey. (inspired by a tiktok trend! the one with the soundboard, iykyk.)

CHARACTERS. wanderer, alhaitham, albedo, childe + GN!reader.

GENRE. full-on crack, some fluff, not-so serious and light-hearted character slander.

CW. has heavy refs to albedo's story / 2.3 event and wanderer's story, brief mentions of blood in childe's part (not detailed/graphic), one brief mention of kissing in wanderer's part, light cussing and terrible humor. + read the alt text on the headers for extra captions, hehe!

THOUGHTS. this is my most unserious work yet and for that, i apologize if this gets too unhinged or inaccurate at some point LMAOOO. red flags are fine, red is my fav color anyway (it's actually light purple) <33 can you guess who's the favorite here 🧍‍♂️

✰ masterlist.

[ WANDERER ]

❝Dream person, huh? That's oddly fitting because the day you win me over is only gonna happen in your dreams too.❞

Has some abandonment and mother issues. ...Yeah. These issues may result in emotional walls as strong and firm as the Great Wall of China but when you break through them, he's never ever gonna let you go (unfortunately). I'd tell you to start running but this silly guy can float and zoom in the air, so best of luck.

You'll only hear crickets if you fall asleep on his chest. On the very rare occasions where he allows you to, that is. If you're into that romantic "falling asleep on your lover's chest while listening to their heartbeat" stuff, you're not getting it with Wanderer here. But if you listen hard enough, maybe you'll get to hear termites or something because he's canonically made out of white wood. (I'm joking, I love him too.)

Terrible with feelings. He'd rather jump off a cliff than start talking about his feelings. ...Okay, fine. Harboring humane emotions is an annoyingly blurry line that he has vowed to stop caring about after regaining his memories. It doesn't mean he doesn't cringe at himself every now and then, though — knowing that he has talked about his feelings to someone else (only you and Nahida) keeps him up at night, as embarrassing as it is to admit. ("Hey, do you remember that one time when you told me—" "I don't.")

May prioritize his pride over you sometimes. Let's take a rainy day as an example. It's pouring cats and dogs which means that the risk of catching a cold is high as ever... thus, as the rain begins to soak you, you turn to your companion (whose clothes are saved by the hat on his head) with puppy eyes. His reply comes in the same speed as a lightning strike; "No," he says. Beg and cry if you want, he is not letting you under his hat because it's "not a damn parasol". Fine, maybe he just doesn't care about your well-being and that's totally fine (sarcastic) — but the very next second, as he grabs your wrist and starts dashing to a nearby inn with you in tow — you can't help but let a small smile slip. Maybe he does care? Pride just gets in the way sometimes.

Might accidentally suffocate you when you two kiss because how the heck is he supposed to remember that humans need to breathe when your lips are just so soft for no reason? Ugh, humans and their ridiculous needs (derogatory but he still loves you simp).

Has a long list of crimes and felonies that we don't talk about. Ah, yes, the courtesy of being a previous Fatui Harbinger, indeed. Irminsul may have forgotten about this list, but the Wiki sure as heck hasn't.

[ ALHAITHAM ]

❝So, you consider me someone who fits your type? I see. Unfortunately, knowing whether or not I fit into another person's ideals doesn't have much value to me.❞

Books > people. Is that really a flaw? He doesn't think it is. Books are a source of knowledge and aren't they supplements that enrich the minds of those who read them? Not to mention, there is no need to cater to whatever social standards with inanimate objects unlike when you're around people. ...But apparently, Kaveh told him that this mindset "makes him look like an absolute loner with no social skills and no friends whatsoever" to which he'd usually bite back with an "at least, I have a stable housing." TLDR: books are Alhaitham's closest friends and that's a little sad (he doesn't care about other people's opinions, though).

Unreachable when his soundproof headphones are on. Shush, he is in his official (but not-so-official) 'Do Not Disturb' mode. Sorry in advance, he may or may not accidentally ignore you when his soundproof headphones are on. If you want to have a few words with him, either be patient and wait or make sure they're of absolute importance lest you risk being given the deadliest, emptiest stare ever known to mankind. If looks could kill, you would've keeled on the spot. Instant unintentional (??) homicide, so true of him.

Awkward with small talks. Alhaitham is good at talking about topics that really matter and he very much prefers it that way too. But that's the thing; when the discussion of that particular subject ends, that's it. He often dodges the silence in a 'cool' way, though; either by taking an early leave or bringing out a book if the situation there still needs him present. (In his defense, if no one wants to start and carry the conversation, then isn't it a bit hypocritical to count on him to do that too?)

Physical affection stupefies him (it'll take time). Alhaitham doesn't hate it, no, but something about it just doesn't align much with his sense of familiarity. He usually keeps his distance; even with new acquaintances, shaking hands has never been his thing and it's been a long time since Alhaitham has had someone he feels comfortable enough to receive physical affection from or to give some of it to (his grandmother was the last, maybe). By all means, this isn't meant to be a sob story — it's just brought up to explain that physical affection is a thing he's not familiar with, so it'll take some time to get used to. Good luck to those with physical touch as a preferred love language (me), this feeble scholar who may turn into a stiff log when you hug him is in your capable hands!

[ ALBEDO ]

❝Is that a compliment of some kind? I must say it's certainly not one I hear very often, thus I feel inclined to appreciate it all the more. Thank you.❞

Has a lab located in Dragonspine. Yes, this is a red flag because look me in the eyes and tell me you would realistically travel up that death trap of a mountain every single time just to spend time with him. He comes down from the mountain at least twice or thrice a month, so you'll still get to see his pretty face regardless, just not as frequently — so, it's either you exchange letters every week or you go trekking up Dragonspine to see him yourself. (There is a better place to die on than that wretched mountain, but I digress.)

His mother caused world destruction and he has a twin brother that is out for blood (Imposterbedo). ...Seriously, what the heck is going on in this family? We need to keep an eye on them like they're fascinating wild animals on National Geographic, for real. If you don't mind crazy in-laws that might commit felonies against you (also looking intently at Alice as I say this, by the way), then you're all good to go! Aha, just watch your back and be safe out there, comrade.

Babysitting Klee comes as a 2-in-1. If you're good with kids, great! If you're not, good luck! You know what they all say; a child's curiosity is only limited by the skies (and a guardian's supervision), so be prepared for when Klee starts tugging you around to go fish blasting or exploring with her. Being with Albedo means you get to see her a lot and she's such an adorable ball of sunshine! But the way she innocently hands you a little bomb like it's a slice of Fisherman's Toast and not a weapon is certainly something to remember, huh? (At this point, this is basically an extra to my previous point about questionable in-laws.)

Eats spiders (not often, but has eaten them and that's concerning). Granted this only applies to a specific type of large spiders that can be found at the roots of Petrified Trees in Domains (in the words of the Chief Alchemist himself), but there will definitely be a time where he goes: "Are you hungry? If I remember correctly, there are still some smoked spiders left from the other day. Fortunately, the temperature here in Dragonspine aids in the preservation method—" Spiders can be cute to some and a nightmare to some, but the fact that he has a whole recipe for it really makes you want to know the how and most importantly, the why. Does he sprinkle parsley on them or some stuff like that, ayo? (at least, if you ever get stuck in a domain one unlucky day, this recipe might help you survive? thanks??)

[ CHILDE ]

❝Oh? I've never been called a dream person before. ...Heh, that sounds new, I like the sound of that!❞

Thinks combat and battles are a better substitute for oxygen. Okay, that may be somewhat of an exaggeration — but it isn't an understatement to say that the thought of challenge rushes the blood into Tartaglia's veins. Not one for the secretive schemes most Harbingers do, this man would even go charging ahead if that guarantees he'll encounter a good fight. Like seriously, if he and a fellow Harbinger are heading to a place where there is a good opponent, you bet Childe is about to speed there first. You could say he is speeding towards uncertain death, essentially.

Might have come home with blood on his cheek once or twice. And what's worse is that this guy probably doesn't even realize it's there. Sorry, he was just too caught up in the moment to properly notice any leftover 'trophies' from his previous fights... Aha, don't worry about it! ("I'm home!" Tartaglia cheers loudly as he, quite literally, throws open the front door to your shared home — only to be greeted by that dumbfounded look on face. "Please tell me that's just juice on your cheek," you frown. He scratches the side of his neck awkwardly, "Uhh. Things didn't go particularly well when I was collecting debts.")

A warrior in the streets, also a malewife who can make you treats. Why does he have that double side for, huh? For other people to swoon over and fall for? No way someone can be a househusband and a good fighter simultaneously. What do you mean he can cook and clean then beat up anyone who threatened you the next? And you're saying he is genuine about it too? I say deception, deception, deception! Sue this fellow for fraud this instant. (This might actually be a green flag in disguise, but you didn't hear that from me.)

No good with saving money. He's stinky rich and most of it might be from the Fatui. You have to wonder whether each Mora he gives goes on the Fatui's tab or something like that... You don't find the idea of owing something to the Fatui fun, but it's so ironic how you're more worried about this than the Eleventh Harbinger is. Welp, at least, you don't have to worry incessantly about saving money now...? ("There's that thing you said you wanted to buy the other day, right? Here you go, honey!" "Tartaglia, why is this Mora pouch heavier than a toddler—")

Has a long list of crimes and felonies that we don't talk about #2. You could definitely argue that Childe might have the least mind-boggling list of crimes amongst the Harbingers all, though. (And does he slay for that? Who knows.)

─ ⊹ ⊱ ・・・・・・☆・・・・・・・⊰ ⊹ ─

© SEELESTIA, mar 2023. do not repost, plagiarize, translate nor claim as your own.

✰ TAGLIST: @meimeimeirin @hcikazu @tsuk4sa-yug1 @catcze @semi-orangeapple @yuuki4646 @d-a-r-k-s-w-a-n @daisydkj @omgscaramouche @coquettemaiden @lemontum @herdrops @lleoll @xiaosonlybeloved @chiisananingen @irethepotato @ainescribe @blooodyvampy @starlightaura @jihyuniepark @duhsies @maybemiko @lordbugs — [ bolded names are unable to be tagged (check your settings!) + register here to be a part of my taglist! ]

[stranger-opinions]

maybe it's not a writers-block; maybe you just need a break

creativity is a muscle, right?

you need to exercise it to keep it in good shape, to have it ready when you need it and don't we all love those hyperfocused sprints of writing where the words just spill out of our fingertips...

but muscles get sore when you overuse them, will strain when you force them past their limits, they need nourishment to stay healthy and in shape

fandom today has a competitive atmosphere. many wouldn't admit that; it's supposed to be fun after all. just vibing with our mutuals, playing with the blorbos having a fun time online to scratch a few itches.

but the truth is that it can become a lot of pressure rather fast.

putting out several k of (edited) writing a month, setting up painstakingly formatted posts with the right tags and a fun header we spent hours on to look effortlessly cool and eye-catching just to hit post and then feel... nervous. excited too, sure...

but damn, when will the next chapter be finished? or the next one shot? will there be enough time to put a few blubs in between so that the few people who actually seem to care won't forget about us and move on?

writing for writing's sake is a nice notion. the myth of the self-sustaining artist who needs nothing more than a passion and their tools of choice.

but shit isn't just created out of nothing.

what has that all to do with the title of this post do you ask?

very few people can just keep going and going making art like that without needing any breaks and a good portion of those people very likely have very different conditions than most of us have with full-time jobs, families, school and so on.

For many of us writing is a main outlet, an important hobby and a safe space but that still doesn't change that it is a creative hobby, an outlet that demands energy: emotional, mental and physical (typing for hours is hard work if you want to believe it or not) and that sometimes makes it impossible to accept that we just need a fucking break.

"writers-block", in my own experience, is my brain telling me that something is off and that it's on strike until I fucking fix that.

and sometimes it's just that I need a break.

that I need to recharge my creative batteries, take in things that inspire me, that make me happy and get me excited without having to make anything myself. to just be. take some walks amongst trees, watch a new series, read a new book, go into a deep dive of some random topic on wikipedia until I don't know where the fuck I started from.

sometimes I just need to log out, cut the overstimulation of a never ending dashboard, turn off what everybody else on tumblr is doing, how much everbody is putting out, get away from my frustration about "my flopped fic" or the latest fandom drama and reconnect with the real reason I am doing this.

the love for stories and the source material.

for some people those breaks can be as short as two days, for other is might be weeks or months and that is not only okay but totally normal.

sometimes you might realize that the reason you are not writing is that you actually don't want to. sometimes you just want to daydream without the extra work sometimes you're just not in a writing mood and it's not much deeper than that.

that doesn't have to mean you're done with your blorbos. it just means that there are more valid and fun ways to play with them.

don't worry, the fandom will still be there when you decide to pick up the keyboard again. maybe with less people, maybe with many different people but you will always find someone who cares. those who have moved on to different things not come back wouldn't likely have stayed if you had powered through.

fandom shouldn't be a you're in or you're out thing but a place you come to when you want to.

contentification of fandom has had a lot of negative effects on the way we create and so many people fade from their hobby because they simply burn themselves out to a point where it leaves a scar.

so. find something that makes you happy that does not require you to invest too much creational energy. rest those muscles as long as it takes.

nothing you can get on tumblr or ao3 is worth the sore brain, the frustration with yourself and the stress you add onto your mental health ontop of everything else in your life.

recharge, reevaluate, reconnect

have fun

[bunni-v1]

CONGRATS FOR THE 500 FOLLOWERS! 💫💫 can i request letters A, B, O, P, Q, S and Y of the sfw list for Malleus and Vil? But in a platonic way, as friendship, if you can<3

🍓I've had this one sitting in my inbox for a while because I've just not been in the mood to write for Malleus. He's a special flavor of autistic that I can only write when the inspiration strikes lol.

Malleus

A - Affection: Malleus is VERY affectionate! He's been loved on a lot by Lilia, so I wouldn't say he's touch-starved, but he does act like he is. He always wants to be holding you in some way, and if you are in his vicinity he will come and find you just to be near you. Always greets you with a hug and a kiss, regardless of who is around or where you're at. Worst of all, he gets pouty and throws a Malleus brand temper tantrum if you deny him any affection.

B - Best Friend: It's really weird to be best friends with Malleus. You sorta found him somewhere on accident, spoke with him, and gained yourself a dragon. You don't ever see him in any place that is conventional or normal, and you rarely actually "hang out" with him. When you do see him, though, he's prone to have these really deep interesting conversations with you and then disappear. Quite freaky.

O - Open: It doesn't occur to Malleus that, maybe, he doesn't need to tell you his whole life story at random times of the day. I mean, seriously, you guys will be doing something like study, and then he'll drop that fattest lore bomb known to man and leave you speechless.

P - Patience: Not very. In fact, most things that would piss other people off just tend to make him laugh. He's essentially a god amongst men with an ego to match, and that ego is anything BUT fragile. It's hard to make him mad. You can upset him and make him out, but anger is rare and SCARY.

Q - Quizzes: He's both really good and very bad. Malleus both has some much going on in his head and absolutely nothing. He remembers important dates, and all of your favorite things, but when it comes to like pulling through on important stuff? He sucks! He forgets! He feels so bad after too, like on his knees begging for forgiveness. Then, at the same time, he'll remember something really obscure that you mentioned in passing and it makes you wonder how the hell his mind works.

S - Security: Oh, Malleus is the MOST protective out of anyone in the twst cast. He's a dragon, after all, and they're mostly known for protecting things. You are his most prized and adored treasure, and he protects you as such. I'm talking like, he's always by your side, always watching you, always ready to jump at the chance to show you how amazing and powerful he is. Now, he never gets the chance because who in their right mind would ever upset THE Malleus Draconia, but he still keeps hoping.

Y - Yuck: He hates it when his title is held over his head. He wants friends and connections and love, but his crown gets in the way. If you ever try to use him for his power that would be an instant no from him, especially if he thought you loved him for more than just his position.

Vil

A - Affection: Vil is like... moderately affectionate. Now, he's not exactly the sweetest person. Vil is all about appearances, and hanging off in public doesn't exactly look good. In private, though? He's making up for the missed affection tenfold. Now he's not a huge cuddler, but he is a kisser. And kiss you he does, everywhere. He's so pleased with the bright red lipstick marks all over your face. On top of that, he pampers you like a princess. Massages, face masks, sweets and tea. Only the best for his darling.

B - Best Friend: Vil just decides that you're friends, and then you're stuck with him. It's really not bad though! He's quite a gossip, so you hear all the latest drama around the halls of NRC. You get free makeovers and get to relax around Pomefiore whenever you want. Most importantly, your social status rises to the top, because any friend of Vil's could be a friend worth having.

O - Open: Vil? Open? Please. He's got walls up greater than the wall of China. It takes him a lot of time to open up to you because all of those stupid emotions he's feeling make him so weak. Once you get the first bit of Vil lore, though, he's like a running faucet and just spills everything everywhere. It really makes you both grow so much closer though.

P - Patience: Eh. He's not awful, better than Riddle at least. Vil does have a temper though, and it's not as uncommon to see it as you may think. Now, he rarely ever gets mad at you unless you do something so stupid that he can't help it in his disbelief. Still, his anger is a sight to witness, and much worse when it's directed at you.

Q - Quizzes: Vil is very good at knowing everything there is to know about you. He writes it down, actually! In his notes app! He has a whole list that's just about you and your likes and dislikes and everything you tell him that he thinks is important. He makes sure to utilize it all the time, and it's really sweet how seen he makes you feel.

S - Security: Vil is moderately protective of you. He doesn't really worry about anyone in your classes, it's rare to find someone actually willing to mess with him. What he is worried about is the media. If they got ahold of you, his more intense fans might try to rip you apart. So, he shields you from that as best as he can, because he doesn't want to see you hurt.

Y - Yuck: If you only want him for his beauty. He is pretty, he knows that, and he understands that it's likely a part of why you love him. However, if you only seem to care about how pretty he is or only compliment his looks, he hates it. There is more to him, why can't you see that?

[xihe1874]

Hello darling! 😘

Another prompt for you, if inspiration strikes.

One idiot overhears the other idiot talks to his bestfriend about the crush he has on this wonderful person [he monologues for a few minutes]. The first idiot is heartbroken because he thinks he doesn't stand a chance now! The other idiot is taken! :(

BUT.

BIG. REVEAL.

*bombadaboum*

The other idiot's crush is actually the first idiot!

[Could work with either Bradley or Jake :P]

[Dare me to find a sillier prompt then that! XD]

Wait, what do you mean by "silly"??? This is one of the most amazing prompts I have ever seen!!! I mean, mutual pining and idiots in love??? Oh I love that!! Thank you so much for sending this to me ❤️

(Hiii my dear long long long time no see! I am sorry for getting back to you so late 🥲 Hope you will enjoy this stupid story 😘)

“Let's play ten fingers.”

Halo's suggestion earned a round of applause.

“And the one who is the first to run out of fingers needs to answer questions from all of the others. Like a Truth or Truth.”

Hangman squinted at the Squad and flipped the toothpick with his tongue.

“Can I skip it?”

“What, you are afraid that your dark little secrets may be revealed, Bagman?” Phoenix rolls her eyes.

Well.

Actually.

He kept his eyes strictly forward and clenched his fists under the table to avoid looking at a certain brunette.

“Just think it would be boring is all.” He shrugged nonchalantly.

“Let's do it.”

Hangman snapped his head to the source of this voice that's too familiar.

Although he's probably addressing the whole table, Rooster was staring at him pointedly, his brown honey eyes totally unreadable.

He gave another bored shrug, but his heart was beating frantically in his chest.

Come on, Jake, put yourself together. It's just a normal stupid game.

It's nothing but a normal stupid game.

The questions, if he hadn't known better, sounded like they were meticulously plotted.

(“Never have I ever grown a moustache.”I mean, could you be more obvious, people?)

(“Never have I ever played 'Great Balls of Fire' on the piano in Hard Deck.” Oh, they actually could.)

Rooster, amiable as ever, just shook his head with an amused grin and put down one finger, and Hangman just loved him a bit more.

His turn. He cleared his throat.

“Never have I ever worn glasses in my life.”

Bob let out a small groan and put down one finger.

Hangman flashed his teeth at the poor guy. Sorry, man, Seresins always got perfect eyesight.

Another three questions, and Rooster only got one finger left.

Hangman was not anxious. Not at all. He just got sweaty palms and speeded heart rate and… 

OK, he was anxious. 

A chance to ask Rooster questions which he could only answer the truth.

What did he want to ask?

What do you think of me?

Do you think of me at all?

Sometimes I think you were looking at me, but when I turned, you always looked away. Were you really looking at me?

Why did you look at me?

Will you punch me if I kiss you?

Do you like me?

He was too caught up in his own thoughts that he almost missed Yale's statement.

“Never have I ever had a crush.”

“No way!”

“That's not true!!”

Despite the protest, the Daggers still reluctantly put down their fingers. 

OK.

So Rooster had had a crush before. Or more than one.

No big deal. Totally, totally no big deal.

Hangman was so jealous that he could explode on the spot.

Fritz whistled.

“Rooster!!”

And then they chanted (like the bunch of idiots they were).

“Rooster, Rooster, Rooster—”

“All right, all right.” There was a faint blush high on his cheekbone. “Shoot your questions.”

“So, regarding your crush, or crushes.” Phoenix wiggles her left eyebrow. “Do you still have one right now?”

The blush reddened. Rooster gave a curt nod.

Uh-oh.

“Have you told them?” 

Rooster sighed. “No. Don't think they are interested.”

He sounded defeated and wishful. So Rooster really liked this lucky bastard.

Engine failure. Repeat, Engine Failure.

“Can you describe them?” 

“They are… ” There were some faraway looks in Rooster's eyes, like a daydream. “... Not the traditional version of warm or kind at the first sight. Aggressive, competitive, arrogant. An asshole, to sum it up.” He chuckled, and Hangman’s heart contracted a bit. “But as time goes up, they kind of… grow on you. Deep, deep down, they are actually loyal and sweet. Brilliant as hell, too.”

Silence. 

Hangman's heart didn't exist any more.

“So…” Beside him, Fanboy made an attempt to ease the tense in the air. “I take it that they are beautiful?”

Hangman focused on the glass on his hand.

“The most beautiful person I have ever seen.”

OK.

That's it. He couldn't stand it any longer.

He stood up so abruptly that his chair was knocked over. Rooster's eyes snapped to him.

“Need some air. Sorry.”

He gestured vaguely and escaped like the heartbroken coward he was.

“Hangman, you OK?”

Damn Rooster and his big kind shiny heart.

He didn't turn around. The sky was quite grey today.

“Finally finished waxing poetic about your stupidly perfect lover?” He spat despite himself. “Never took you for a romantic, Rooster.”

When there was no reply behind him for one minute, Hangman shut his eyes and sighed. Driving away the only person he had ever loved with this bitter jealousy? He would definitely die alone, thank you.

“You haven't asked your question.”

Hangman startled. 

“Well, if you still can't catch it by now, I don't have the faintest interest in your unrequited love, Bradshaw—” He turned around and was taken back by the hurt in Rooster's eyes.

God. Why was he always like that?

He rushed to apologize, but Rooster just shook his head and repeated.

“You haven't asked your question.”

They were standing quite close, Hangman realized dimly.

And Rooster was gazing at him with his gorgeous eyes.

“Were you talking about me just now?”

Wait, what?

WHAT?

Oh shit. He said that aloud.

Shitshitshitshitshit.

Oh god.

He squeezed his eyes shut and was unwilling to see the disgust on Rooster's face.

“Yes.”

God, he's going to hate me for…

Wait.

WHAT???

He opened his eyes.

There was only an inch between them and there was something akin to hope in Rooster’s eyes.

“What?” He whispered.

“You can only ask one question.” Rooster whispered back, his breach caressing Hangman's lips.

“Then can I switch to dare?”

“It depends.”

“I dare you to kiss me.”

And then Rooster's lips were on his. And then everything was perfect and perfect.

“So, I grew on you, huh?”

 “Don't get so smug.”

“I am the most beautiful you've ever seen?”

“Oh for god's sake, shut up, Seresin.”

“Make me, Bradshaw.”

Everything was perfect.

[mylovelies-docx]

Sorry, I Love You - Part 9

Oh wow, a new chapter? Who'd have thunk it.

My posting schedule is all off and I honestly don't know if I can get it back under control. I have no idea when I'll get time to sit down and write and when inspiration will strike, so I can't assure weekly updates. But I'll try my hardest to get this story out! I have future chapters written, it's just that I have no way of connecting them right now :/ Oops.

Plot: You and Bucky have a good thing going - best of friends that also have more than a little chemistry between the sheets. Everything is fine until you develop feelings for the man who doesn't want a relationship. What will happen when Bucky finds out?

C/W: Ah shit, here we go again. Angst, arguments, jealousy

Word Count: 2,250

Tag List: NOW CLOSED! If you'd like to keep up with this story, please follow my blog and turn on notifications! ❤️ you :)

[Prologue][Part 1][Part 2][Part 3][Part 4][Part 5][Part 6][Part 7][Part 8]

Some moments are easier than others. Sometimes you feel like you’re not pining like a love-sick teenager enough to think that you can actually do this – you can actually be friends with the man you love.

But then there are moments like tonight.

A few weeks have passed since community get-together, and you and Bucky are the new kids in town. Everyone drops by to say hello, leave you with enough food to last the winter, and invite you both back to their homes for dinner. It’s all very sweet, and you would appreciate the hospitality in any other situation.

But the amount of mothers trying to marry their daughters off to Bucky is insane. 

Several have not-so-subtley seated Bucky next to daughters of marriageable age, while everyone else is silently discouraged from interrupting their conversations. It skeezes you out when the girls are barely out of their teens, but most of the girls are around your age or older. Morality-wise, that’s a whole lot more appropriate. Internal monologue-wise, ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh doesn’t even begin to cover it. What you feel whenever he laughs at something they say, or looks at them with his intense blue eyes – it hurts. That’s how he used to look at you, once upon a time. Like his life wouldn’t be the same without you in it, like you’re one of the most important people in his world.

To be fair to Bucky, you probably read waaaay more into it than he ever meant. And you only ever really saw that look come out when you were straddling his waist and grinding hard on his cock, skin mottled with his teeth marks and wearing his metal hand as a necklace. 

Stop, stop, stop, stop!

Anyway,

You’re usually placed next to older, widowed relatives, as most of the young men in the town have already settled down and popped out a few kids with their spouses except for Petre. Tessa foists the two of you together at every possible opportunity, hoping you’ll hit it off and decide to get married in the near future. 

Petre is nice, smart, cute, but not really your type. You’re convinced that you’ve only ever had one type and he’s off-limits. But Petre’s company is much more enjoyable than the sad, lonely older men they try to pair you with – it never feels great to be compared to someone’s long lost love – so you don’t mind having someone around your age to talk during these things.

Speaking of.

“It’s a nice night, yeah?” Petre comments. The night is warmer than expected, but you and Petre are still bundled up in your coats as you stroll through the dead copse of trees near the latest dinner party. The sun had set only minutes ago and the stars are making their presence known. There’s next to no light pollution in this area, so you always take the time to admire the night sky when you have the chance. 

You often take walks with Bucky up and down your street as a way to decompress after your shifts at the HYDRA facility. After the first week or so of being everyone’s errand-runner, they’ve slowly built up your workload to include calculations and deductions based on redacted data – it’s not as much information as you’d like, but it’s enough to build a foundational understanding of what the experiment was about.

You hum in agreement and continue walking. It’s about time to turn around and head back, but you can’t bring yourself to return only to watch Bucky flirt with the pretty girls that were also invited.  

“Is something the matter?” Petre asks you.

You startle out of your petty, jealous thoughts. “Hm? Oh, no. Nothing’s wrong,” you reply with a smile.

“It’s just that you seem very distracted tonight,” he responds.

With your hands in your pocket, the only thing you can do is shrug your shoulders. “Just tired, is all. It’s been a long week at the office.”

“Ah, I know the feeling,” Petre commiserates. 

All of the sudden, a wailing, piercing shriek ricochets between the tree trunks and reverberates in your ears. Tensing with adrenaline, you take two steps forward, ready to intervene in whatever events are unfolding in the darkness.

Before you get much further, Petre reaches out and takes hold of your elbow. Turning you around, he starts leading the way back. You try to tug your arm from his grip, but he holds firm.

“The cry of a vixen who is looking to mate. They’re rather vicious creatures this time of year, foxes. We don’t want to get in her way,” Petre deters.

“But…” you begin, looking back over your shoulders and watching for unexpected movement among the swaying branches. “It sounds so real.”

“Terrifying, really. I was just as concerned when they began, as well.” Petre gives you a tight smile and relaxes his grip slightly when you stop trying to pull away.

“What do you mean?” you question.

“What?” Petre’s eyes flash around quickly, looking through the woods that surround you.

“‘When they began’. What do you mean by that?”

“Ah,” Petre replies. “When mating season began.”

There’s no more discussion on the eerily accurate sound of a woman in distress. You can only trust that Petre would know the local fauna and their habits better than you, since you’ve never spent an extended period of time in areas such as this.

***

The neighbor’s house finally comes into view. A lone figure stands silhouetted against the porch as they lean against the railings, their arms braced against the banister and posture rigid. When you get closer, you realize that the figure is Bucky. 

You can’t see his face, but you can feel his eyes on you. And apparently Petre can as well.

“He doesn’t like me?” Petre asks.

“Why do you say that?” The question puzzles you because Bucky has no reason to dislike Petre. He’s been incredibly helpful so far, allowing you to ask as many questions as you want about himself and others and he doesn’t seem bothered by it at all. In fact, you feel as if you and Petre have become friends.

“It just seems like he’s never happy to see me.”

“Oh, don’t worry about that – James just has RBF,” you reply nonchalantly.

“RBF?” Petre replies.

You laugh as you and Petre climb the stairs, only now realizing that he still has a hand on your arm. You’d forgotten all about it, but you miss the slight warmth that permeated through your jacket when he removes his touch. You turn to look at him, but Petre is looking away, his hands now deep in his pockets. Turning your focus onto Bucky, you see him watching Petre, his eyes squinted.

A large smile returns to your face as you reach up and grab Bucky’s chin, squishing his cheeks and making his lips pucker from the pressure. “This –” you say triumphantly, “is an RBF.”

Bucky glares down at you and swats your hand away. You cackle at the perfect example of Resting Bitch Face™ in front of you, throwing your head back in joy. When you right your posture again, you can see a small smile on Bucky’s face as he laughs along with you.

“Whatever,” he murmurs. He shakes his head in exasperation before circling his arm around your shoulders. Bucky begins dragging you back down the steps you had just ascended and you grunt in protest. “It’s time to go,” he says simply.

“Ugh, you’re so rude,” you say to him. Craning your neck as much as possible, you look back towards Petre who remains on the porch. “I’ll see you later!” you call backwards with a wave. Petre raises a hand in return, face hidden in shadow as Bucky’s had been.

Focusing back on the road in front of you, you can practically feel what little mirth Bucky had drains away. Looking up, you notice that his jaw is clenched and a hard look has entered his eye.

“What’s wrong?” Now you’re worried that something happened to Bucky while you were gone that has put him in a bad mood. Did someone say something to him? Did one of the women reject his advances? You can’t see who in their right mind would turn him down, but not everyone feels the same way about him as you do. But if it’s the latter, the guilt you feel only slightly outweighs the relief.

“You don’t think you’re spendin’ too much time with him?” Bucky says between clenched teeth.

A frown appears between your eyebrows as you continue to look up at him. “No?” you respond. “He doesn’t seem to mind.”

“Ofcoursehedoesn’t,” Bucky mutters under his breath, but you can still hear him.

You slide out from under Bucky’s hold, his agitation sparking flames of your own. “What’s that supposed to mean?” 

“You don’t think you’re leadin’ him on a bit, Y/N?” Bucky asks you.

You scoff. “What the fuck are you talking about?” 

“You’re always hangin’ around him!” Bucky quips back. “You’re flirting with him and walking out of parties together. All these people, Petre included, are going to think you’re pitching for an engagement.”

The hurt and pitiful feelings from earlier tonight come flooding back. Only this time, instead of feeling them for what they are, you combine them with the anger his comment brings. How dare he accuse you of leading Petre on? As if he isn’t doing the same thing to all those girls?!

“And what about you?!” you yell, the last word ripping its way between your lips and setting your tongue ablaze. “You don’t think you’re stringing all these girls along behind you? You don’t have any intention of getting into a relationship with any of them, either, do you?” 

As the words escape, you remember how Bucky sat you down and asked for a friends-with-benefits situation. Said he wasn’t ready for a real relationship, but tired of one night stands. How the two of you could help each other out since you weren’t seeing anyone either. The old resentment towards yourself and how you let yourself fall for someone wholly unavailable whiplashes back into your mind after months of repressing it. 

If he could ask that of you, does that mean he’s asked someone else? You usually arrive home later than him, but on some occasions that you are released early, he’s not there. Instead of asking where he’s been, you had just let it slide since it could have been construed as possessiveness. Like your feelings – that Bucky believes to be long gone – entitle you to his life. You hadn’t wanted to risk anything at the time, but now your mind can’t help running wild at the possibilities.

“It’s not like I’m screwing his brains out every time we’re gone!” You shout at Bucky. You had been walking down the road away from the house party which was on a street with few homes, so there’s nobody around to hear your fight. “We’re not in the bathrooms having quickies, he’s not fucking me against a wall, or bending me over his motorcycle! He hasn’t proposed we fuck around with each other until someone better comes along!” 

Your chest heaves with the effort of expelling these vicious words from deep within your heart, and you can feel a burning beginning to creep behind your eyes. You hate getting angry – hate that any strong emotion makes your eyes well with tears and makes you look weak. And in this situation, you are weak – weak against Bucky, weak against yourself, weak against the knowledge that the one man you’ve ever loved never felt the same way and never will. Your inability to keep yourself from falling for someone you knew you could never have? Your jealousy that he is probably sleeping with one or more of the women in town? That makes you weak. 

And you can’t stand to be weak in front of Bucky again.

“Newsflash, Buck: I know how it feels to be lead on by you and it fucking sucks!” You lower your voice slightly and take another step away from him. “I know that wasn’t your intention, and I didn’t feel that way at first, but that’s how I feel now.”

“You were my best friend, Y/N – I didn’t want to lose that!” Bucky exclaims. “And I genuinely thought we were on the same page!” He takes a deep breath and clasps his hands over his eyes before saying, “And seeing you run off with Petre all the time just reminds me of us – how we’d always sneak away to get some time alone. It’s just –” He drops his hands and sighs heavily, looking up at the star-studded sky and then back down to you. “I’m jealous.”

“You’re jealous?” You ask incredulously. “Why?”

“Because –” You can tell that he’s struggling to get this out, and if he hadn’t started this argument and accused you of wronging Petre, you might have been more receptive to what he’s saying. More understanding. But right now, your anger swallows all empathy and hope that his words would usually supply. “Because that could have been us,” he breathes. Bucky takes a tentative step in your direction, but freezes solid at the icy glare you send his way.

“No,” you say flatly, “No, it couldn’t have. You made that abundantly clear when I asked.”

You turn your back on him and start running, ignoring the sound of your name as you leave Bucky behind.

Part 10

Taglist: @jackiehollanderr @rabbitrabbit12321 @12345sebby @blackwood-bodecker-housewifeife @lauraashley93 @themorningsunshinee @happinessinthebeingg @nash-dara @calwitch @stany0url0calwh0res111 @pono-pura-vida @learisa @introverbatim @kentokaze @marvelogic @kaz11283

[piracytheorist]

So with that out of the way, I'll share some screenshots and my experience from the little I played from the Spy x Family game.

Note/reminder that I openly don't recommend buying the game for a computer, as the controls are clunky, and since that version is half-baked it's not worth your money, even if you plan on using a controller. Different case if you buy it for a console, though.

So the graphics are actually pretty cute, and I think they translate the feeling of the 2D characters into a 3D game environment pretty well! The music stands between an inspiration from the original anime soundtrack and typical day-in-the-life simulation game soundtrack, though mostly the latter. I wasn't impressed that much but it wasn't something that annoyed me. It's just a bit of a pity because they could definitely get some inspiration from the original soundtrack, but oh well.

Playing the game, Anya starts at Eden College, and you get a tutorial showing you how to move and interact with other characters and objects. First it instructs you to talk to Becky, then to Damian.

And as I saw that I was like "... Do I have to?" XD Luckily, he wasn't annoying that time, just distant.

Then Anya comes back home to tell her parents about her Diary project, and I had her explore the house a bit.

In the manga and anime there's this small separate space on the hall right by the entrance, and I actually just realized that, but in the game's version of the house that area doesn't exist.

From what I remember, in the game there is just a wall where the opening to this space is. Since this space is rarely used in the manga/anime and it would have taken memory space, I understand why they didn't add it. From the little I played Anya could only move around the main spaces, kitchen, dining/living area and hall, but those parts were pretty accurate.

And according to my post about the Forgers' kitchen, here it looks accurate to the anime, though with a two-door fridge instead.

I mostly took this because I found it funny how atrocious his posture was XD he's probably tired, the poor man.

One of the few minigames I tried was bowling. I like how each characters game traits actually fit their characters XD

Like, Yor is Strong™ but with the least dexterity, Anya is the luckiest but also the weakest, Loid is the most dexterous... and also the unluckiest. I'm telling you, I can find opportunities for angst like it's my job.

Anyway, that minigame was actually nice, it took me a bit to get the hang of the curveballs but I'm sure I could get better at it if I trained more. I played as Loid, too XD

I liked the characters' responses to their throws, either going like "This is hard" or "This is harder than it looks" (even Loid, lmao, with me controlling him he actually became bad at something) if they threw only a few pins. Funny thing is, when Loid was first about to throw his ball, he said something like "Child's play" but then because it was me controlling him he only threw a couple pins and was like "This is hard" 😂 Poor Yor said "Was this good?" a few times right after throwing her ball, then Anya did a strike, and Yor and I as Loid did a spare (when you throw the remaining pins on your second go). For each of those, the other characters cheered for the one doing the strike or spare, and that was cute. Funniest responses was when a throw wouldn't get a single pin, Anya did her "Shock" face, Yor looked embarrassed, and Loid cringed back with a drop of cold sweat on his face (I was the reason for that, sorry man XD) Loid ended up winning and even though he had missed a couple of throws, at the end he was once again like "Child's play" like, my MAN, stop embarrassing yourself and me.

Anyway. Back to the story. There were some cute moments of banter, I feel they captured the characters pretty accurately!

Then I could go into character customization and. Some interesting choices there.

"Just going to work". Yes. That work XD

And then this... item.

MAXIMUM CHARISMA

I'm still laughing about it XD

Then it was ooting time, and I actually really loved the loading screens!

They have a cute feel to them :)

One of the few pictures I took for Anya's album. Whatever is happening on that Spy Wars issue Anya was reading, it must be interesting!

Anya later mentioned she'd sleep with Agent Penguinman that night, and Bond did not like that XD

When I FINALLY managed to hit the required score for Yor's fruit chopping minigame, Anya looked very smug about it 😁

As I mentioned, it took me a lot of times to get the gist of when exactly to swing to cut the vegetables, and every time Yor missed a vegetable she would say something... but there were no subtitles for those lines XD judging by a few lines I've picked up from the anime, I think she was just saying things like "I missed" or an exclamation of disappointment, and one single "I'm sorry, Anya-san". I wanted to hug her!

Then it was back to school the next day.

I'm right there with ya, girl XD

Then Anya asked Yor to train her, and Yor started giving her some advice on how to throw punches... and then Loid slipped in and was like uhm wut O_o

This next part was a little weird, because Anya was supposed to be drawing (like she did in Episode 3 in the museum kids room) and Loid was going like "Oh this is Bondman and a princess, right? That part is a little graphic, though" but... she wasn't drawing? Loid was just standing in the kitchen and I approached him to talk to him and they just said lines similar to the scene I mentioned above from episode 3. It didn't seem like it fit, and only added it so they could have Anya do that expression, which, okay, fair enough XD

This was Anya's expression when she realized Loid had completely misjudged what she was drawing and her powers weren't at risk of being exposed XD

A quick Handler cameo!

That was the intro for a minigame of Twilight sneaking into an art gallery and having to swap paintings for forgeries. I just found her appearance quite cool!

... This, however, was the minigame that proved this game doesn't work well with a keyboard. Controlling the character AND the camera with keyboard buttons is very tricky, and while I could manage moving Anya around, I had a lot of trouble moving Twilight around while I was on a timer and I had to avoid the guards seeing him.

So yeah. It could have been fun but for a computer user it can be frustrating. I tried twice and failed to complete the minigame, and at that point I was tired; it was more stressful than satisfying that way, so I just quit the game, uninstalled it and had it refunded.

Anyway, as I said, it looks like a fun game, but one that can only be appreciated through a console that already includes controllers with joysticks. Computer users shouldn't have to need external controllers to enjoy a game for the computer, so I definitely don't recommend buying it for the PC, if nothing else, for the moral of it. They could have optimized it to move the camera with the mouse, which is how the grand majority of such games work, but they half-assed it and as such I don't think they deserve anyone's money, especially at the price it's at (50 euros for us to need an external controller? no thanks).

[naffeclipse]

hi! sorry to bug you, but I has a question on how you make aus and stuff! (pls direct me to a post if you’ve already answered my questions :>)

how do you come up with your au concepts? and how do you not get burnt out on them super quick? does writing ever get really hard when making your fics? and how do you usually combat that? (as a writer I struggle with focusing on one project and hopping onto the next thing). I could use some tips on how you go about developing and going through the process of making fic and ideas without giving up in the beginning ^-^’

ty for your time, if you’re reading this! have a good day!

Heya! Okay, I'll answer these as best as I can!

how do you come up with your au concepts?

Mostly from inspiration, things I like, and things I would like to see cobbled together in a fic. It's just whatever strikes me! Keep creating and keep creating—it's like working out a muscle. The more you do it, the stronger you are at it. Though you should know that not all the au concepts I have are good or shareable, but all that matters is that I keep creating things I like and playing around with fun concepts.

how do you not get burnt out on them super quick?

Mostly by taking it slow and easy. I think it's simple to get burnt out on creative projects if you hit them too hard or fast like you're guzzling water—of course, you're gonna get sick of it super fast. If you sip at it slowly, bit by bit, it's easier to digest. I suppose I do that by stretching it out so it's much more manageable.

does writing ever get really hard when making your fics?

Absolutely. Writing is the hardest thing I've ever done and the most rewarding. Of course, I get discouraged, insecure, stuck, and lost in my writing. Sometimes I don't know what to do. I just keep going though, and don't stop.

and how do you usually combat that?

Mostly by taking a breather, stepping away, and asking for a second opinion. Usually, that hard place I'm stuck in isn't actually as bad as I thought it was the next day or after getting some feedback on it.

(as a writer I struggle with focusing on one project and hopping onto the next thing)

Something that helps is making sure the fic is something you're passionate about—make sure you're creating for yourself, out of your enjoyment. Also, having a set goal and outline is really helpful with completing projects, especially if it's a big fic. It keeps you on track and helps guide you when you get stuck or lost. Another thing is reminding yourself why you're writing it, whether it's for a specific scene at the end, you want to tell this story or any other motivation. Keep falling in love with it and keep working on it, bit by bit. I should also say it's okay if your attention slips. Usually, when I feel like I'm getting antsy and my focus is shifting to something else, I'll write a drabble or put that idea down on paper to get it out of my system, then return to whatever I need to complete. Stay dedicated and disciplined. You'll make it.

[the-badger-mole]

Aang has to be one of the least popular protagonist I have seen on ao3. Out of all the main characters who appeared in season 1 and beyond (aamg, Katara, Sokka, and Zuko) aang has the least stories. I have never seen that happen to a main character before. Aang has like 13,000 stories and he is a side character in a majority, so it makes me think, why do so many people argue aang is such a great main character when he seems to be the least liked even by his fans.

This isn't me trying to do some popularity contest, it just seems like even fanfic writers can't do anything interesting with his character, which is sad because he has a lot of potential to be an amazing character.

Child who lost everyone he has ever known to war and time, waking up a hundred years later with the weight of this new world on his shoulders while still grieving his previous life, is such an interesting character, and the show did nothing with that and so neither did the fans.

You know what show did that premise justice? Futurama.

I think Aang's lack of attention comes down to him being ultimately a boring character. Yes, the premise of Aang had potential, but then Bryke turned him into a Gary Stu. And not even a particularly good Gary Stu. I think the lack of fics centering Aang have few explanations. Making Aang a more interesting character would take a lot of work. A lot more than people who aren't his biggest fans are probably willing to put in. It's easier to treat him like a side character, because frankly, that's what he should have been.

Second, fans who do like Aang- like his canon story and his canon ship- probably don't have a ton to add. I think that's not uncommon with a lot of canon ships. Most of my ships have been canon and although I have written for those shows, I'm a lot more prolific with Zutara- my one non-canon ship. I sincerely doubt I'd still be this invested if Zutara were canon. I'd still love them, but the same way I love Usa/Mamo. Content to just let the story be what it is, for the most part, unless inspiration strikes.

I also imagine some of it has to do with not wanting to admit how awful the canon made him seemingly by accident. In order to make an interesting story about Aang, they'd have to add some conflict, and no die hard Aang fans seem to be anymore willing to do that than Bryke were. Take that with a grain of salt, though. This is just my opinion. I don't spend a bunch of time reading Aang fics.

Third, the lack of Aang centered fics may actually be based on his popularity. I don't know. I think there are way fewer Aang fans than there seems to be, it's just that the main Aang fans are so loud. I wouldn't be surprised. After all, he's the most boring of the main cast, his tragic backstory notwithstanding. I only know two or three Aang/Kataang fans in real life, and they are very, very casual fans. Most of the other ATLA fans I know prefer other characters/ ship Zutara. Obviously, online Aang isn't the most popular character either. Oh, sure, there are plenty of polls that put him/his canon ship at the top, but if you look at the actual fan content...well, you can see for yourself.

[laurasimonsdaughter]

Question question, Wizard of Oz is one of my favorite stories/series, and though it was written to be a "modern fairy tale", it's quite different from the tales you talk about here, so I was wondering about your feelings and thoughts on it

My feelings on the Wizard of Oz are a little complicated, so it's probably fair to start with saying that I've only read a Dutch translation of Baum's The Wonderful Wizard of Oz that was probably somewhat shortened. And I've never read the other books in the series. With that said:

I like the Wizard of Oz! It has fun fantasy logic, a plucky heroine, melting witches, fantastic magic shoes, flying monkeys, a mix of 'real magic' and the power of belief, and you can kiss protective stars onto foreheads.

What I don't like, is that it keeps showing up on lists of "most beloved fairy tales", while it really isn't - in my personal opinion - a fairy tale. (Just like Peter Pan, Pinnochio and Alice in Wonderland, but I digress.) I think it's a great example of being inspired by fairy tale elements, but giving them your own spin.

The magical silver shoes, for example, are very like the kind of object you'd find in a fairy tale. They'll remind people of Cinderella's slippers and the Seven League Boots, but also of the gifts (magic nuts, protective necklace, blessed weapon) that fairy tale heroes often get. Letting them be stolen from a witch, however, and making their magic unclear at first and then having them do full teleportation, is much more fantasy than fairy tale.

Another fun twist is Dorothy melting the Wicked Witch with water. This does not come from folklore, but it's such a striking visual that it is pretty much part of American folklore by now. Which in my opinion is a testament to how good of an idea that was! Because it sounds like something that makes sense to defeat an evil witch with. There is folklore scattered about that states witches can't cross running water (like some vampires) and water as a purifying, cleansing thing is deeply routed in all kinds of traditional beliefs.

But at its core The Wonderful Wizard of Oz feels much more like a fantasy travel adventure to me, than like a fairy tale. Most fairy tale characters are archetypal, and their motivations are simple. The story focuses on what happens to them and how they act, but rarely on their inner experiences. This works well for a short tale, because you don't get bogged down in details, but usually starts to drag in a longer format. It's not strange to me that Anderson's The Snow Queen usually gets shortened in retellings, it makes it a full fairy tale instead of a fairy tale-ish saga. Nor that De Villeneuve's Beauty and the Beast only ended up in oral tradition after De Beaumont cut out half the plot. (Elaborate dream sequences are hard to remember when telling stories around the fire).

I feel like The Wonderful Wizard of Oz has far more to say than would have ever fit in a fairy tale. Not just because of the length, but also because of the kind of story it wants to tell. So I personally wouldn't call it a fairy tale, but I do think it added wonderful imagery to our fairy tale telling vocabulary ^^

Also, in my Dutch translation there was a beautiful illustration of Glinda's female guards, dressed in what I now realise must have been inspired by Canadian mounted police uniforms. Child-me thought they were the absolute best <3

[blouisparadise]

Here are some amazing bottom Louis fics that were posted or completed during the month of June. We really hope you enjoy this list. Happy reading!

1) All This Time | Teen & Up | 1046 words

Louis Tomlinson had been best friends with flower shop owner Gemma Styles for years. It wasn't until she suggested he date her alpha brother that he ever thought of Harry that way. Maybe it wasn't such a bad idea...

2) On The Borderline Tonight | Mature | 1470 words

Note: The main pairing is Louis/Ethan Hawke.

Louis is an artist in need of inspiration. He finds it one sunny afternoon in a Brooklyn coffee shop.

3) Everything Is So Fine, Little Bit Of Sunshine | Not Rated | 2,009 words

Fluffy PWP of catboy Louis and his boyfriend Harry.

4) Soulmated | Mature | 2046 words

Niall forces Louis on a date. Ends differently than both of them expected.

5) Beauty And The Beast | Explicit | 2216 words

A virginal Louis is ‘sacrificed’ to the Beast to ensure the safety of his village. Dressed in ceremonial attire, Louis is locked in the stocks at nightfall and offered up to the Beast.

6) Darling, Just Hold On | Explicit | 2481 words

“I’m actually dying for a piss, but I don’t really know what to do about that. Here’s COACOAC.”

7) Thank You Five! | Explicit | 2719 words

It’s fifteen minutes to the start of Harry’s set and he is nowhere to be seen, much to the stress of everyone else……it might be that he is a little busy with a certain blue-eyed Doncaster lad.

8) Obey Your Alpha | Explicit | 3413 words

Harry and Louis are mated, but Simon isn't happy about it. He ends up separating them from each other. All is good though.

9) Don't You Know That I Am Right Here? | Mature | 4314 words

Louis is proud to be an Omega but his journey hasn’t been exactly easy so far. There’s nothing technically “wrong” with him, or so his doctor likes to remind him when he goes to see him every year since he was 15. His situation is more unusual than a medical problem, but it doesn’t mean most alphas will see it that way. When yet another inconvenient heat threatens to disturb his grad school move-out date, he sets a plan in motion. Enter best friend and gentle alpha Harry Styles.

10) I Can't Get You Off My Mind (I Still Crave It) | Mature | 4519 words

"You're an idiot," It was Lya's time to interrupt. "Why would you want another guy when you already have yours? Don't you ever get tired of those silly games?" "It is different!," Louis defended himself again, mouth open. "How come it is different?," Lya asked again. "I love Harry," it was easy like breathing. "He's the love of my life, I'm going to marry him," Louis looked around, until his eyes looked with Harry's, glossy and vibrant. "That guy was just a hook."

11) The Way to My Heart | Teen & Up | 6516 words

Louis' having a bit of a dry spell, until he bumps into an attractive alpha in the supermarket and leaves with his number. It was a hard bump. Very... muscular. The only problem is, said alpha asks Louis to cook for him - which is not exactly his skill set.

12) New Alpha | Mature | 6841 words

Request: Can you do omega Louis goes into heat and Harry finds him. They mate and Louis get's pregnant. But with more story behind it. Thanks (I know it's standard. But I really love werewolf stories.)

13) Rock My World | Mature | 14238 words

Harry threw the burly guy off the hot, clueless man in seconds. Harry turned his back to the pit of rowdy men and planted his feet to keep them steady. “Are you okay, kid?” The man he saved was even more beautiful than Harry expected. His tiny, elfish nose crinkled at the pet-name. The black lines around his eyes made his blue eyes even more striking. His cheekbones were prominent, making his overall frame even more small. “My name is Louis and I’m fine. Get off me, perve!” Harry hadn’t realized he’d kept his free hand against the small of his back or that it kept the man pressed directly his chest. Harry hated releasing him even in the slightest; Louis was much safer here. “Can you not see I’m security? That it’s my job to save idiots like you?” “Idiot?” Louis shouted to be heard over the man currently screaming his head off into the microphone. “Well, I’m sorry for being small, you dick! Not my fault they slammed into me!”

14) One Day I'll Come Into Your World And Get It Right (A Relaxing Afternoon.... Or Is It?) | Explicit | 14652 words

Zayn treated Louis to an afternoon massage with his friend Harry. They meant well. But Louis was sensitive, and Harry found him too much for his taste and... They're going to send Zayn a fruit basket.

15) What's Left Of My Halo's Black | Explicit | 22464 words As Harry sucks lovebites into Louis’ neck, Louis hopes that one day those marks will cover the way he can still feel Alex’s handprints burned into his flesh. As Harry’s nails drag scratches along Louis’ back, Louis hopes that one day the scabs on his heart will heal and drop away just like the scabs on his skin. As Harry fucks him down into the mattress, the bed shaking with every thrust, Louis hopes that one day his mouth will forget the shape of Alex’s name, won’t trace it over and over as the heat builds inside him, won’t want to scream it when he comes. Maybe one day he’ll open his eyes, as he slowly floats down from his post-orgasm haze, and won’t expect to see Alex’s face smiling back at him. But today is not that day.

16) True Blue | Explicit | 23409 words

Louis has always prided himself on making plans. His freshman year of high school he’d spent the entire night color-coding a five-year plan to get him to the exact career that he’s in today. When his parents wouldn’t let him and Zayn see the midnight premiere of the final Harry Potter, he’d crafted an intricate slideshow mapping out each outcome that his parents were worried about and countering every argument they’d tried to give. Just last week he’d sat down with Harry and forced him to listen to his ten-step process for them to secure the front row at their favorite artist’s show. It’s with this experience under his belt that he starts to devise another plan. One to start pulling his weight and also to prove to Harry and everyone that he is very much capable of fending for himself, thank you very much.

17) Hope Your Life Leads You Back To My Door | Explicit | 56709 words

“What’s the matter?” Louis asked quickly, eyes wide in alarm. “I’ve never done this before. I’ve never gone anywhere alone like this,” Harry whispered, his voice shaky. Louis didn’t look surprised, but there was something really fiery about him as he spoke again. “Then come now,” he insisted with a grin. “Just trust me. Get on this train with me and I promise you’ll have so much fun.” Louis Tomlinson wasn’t ever someone Harry thought he’d trust or look to with such open admiration for having the spirit to do things like this, but suddenly, he did. He trusted him and he wanted this. He was going to do it.

18) Where I Burn To Be | Explicit | 143346 words

There were very few people who managed to get under Louis’ skin as effortlessly as Harry had, and even fewer who had done it in only a day and a half. It was quite an accomplishment, really. They’d only interacted a handful of times and yet Louis had the insatiable desire to slam the locker into that frustratingly well-defined face that never seemed to hold any expressions other than contempt and arrogance. “That’s right. I do own the skies. And you wanna know why?” he sneered. Without his boots on, Louis was a fair bit shorter than Harry, his eyes pretty much level with Harry’s chin and his socked toes bumping into the boots of the other man, close enough that Louis could make out the tiny scar on Harry’s brow and the individual shades of emerald in his irises. He was handsome, but that only made Louis hate him more. Heart thumping heavily against his sternum and his hands balled into fists, Louis lifted his chin defiantly and plastered a coldhearted smirk across his lips. “Because I’m the best goddamn pilot here.”

Check out our other fic rec lists by category here and by title here.

You can find other monthly roundup fic rec lists here.

[rulanarinrush]

Hi! I just want to let you know that you are my most beloved fanfic creator of Despair Time. I'm choosing to remain anonymous while posting this because I don't wish to appear impolite to other fanfic creators. Nevertheless, you are without a doubt my favorite. Your works that delve into various pairings have enabled me to gain a deeper understanding of the character dynamics that I had never considered before. I frequently read fanfictions on AO3. When I discovered that three of my favorite fics were all penned by you (even though one was posted anonymously, the writing style is still recognizable), I was so shocked and excited that I let out a scream.

From a more personal standpoint: (Though I wouldn't classify myself as a rareshipper) (I mainly ship Whitvid); (as far as I can recall, ) I was probably the first to post Whitvid-related art on Tumblr, thanks to your post titled "But you and I are only human in the end." Additionally, I am very fond of the time-loop theory and the idea of a Whit who is secretly ‘a bit unhinged yet not in a totally evil way.’ Your articles about the characters’ inner thoughts and your character studies are always so interesting to me and you've done them so well that I am greatly inspired after reading them.

From an even more personal perspective: I think that Whit is the top. Whenever I read your comments with (that guy who used Ryoma as an avatar) I burst into immense laughter :3

To sum up: Thank you for creating all the amazing fanfics! ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^I will continue to support your work! 💖💖💖💖💖💖💖

Thank you so, so much anon! Your words are so flattering! Favorite, wow! When I write character studies, I try to be honest with myself about their flaws and whether or not they would encourage each other or drag the other down, so I know they're not very romantic sometimes, but I find writing the tension to be so exciting, I'm glad you like them!

Whitvid is an awesome ship! They are very alike each other in the sense that they want to be nihilistic about the world, but I feel like the narrative of drdt is doing a great job of tackling why it can't work in David's case. Whit did a great job of shoring up his defenses unlike David, because he idolizes the dead. He has no star to place all his hopes on(David with Xander). He doesn't have to be vulnerable unlike David and the rest of the cast, and that really gets to David, because both hope and despair have no effect on him, nihilism at its absolute best and worst. "but you and I are only human in the end" was actually my very first non-drabble format drdt fic(published), so it does hold a special place in my heart! They're both messed up people in a way that attracts Whit but repulses David.

Haha, the timeloop theory! It's very interesting because the story could be metaphorical, meant to show how everyone will lose hope in their future if everything always repeats and there's no escape from the cycle(Teruko) but if there's any character in the cast that shows the most symptoms of being bored of the killing game, it's Whit for sure lol. Since much of his philosophy involves either not confronting or obscuring trauma, he's definitely fucked up. I'm glad that when I write Whit he doesn't come across as evil; it is sometimes a hard balance to strike because he's wise and perceptive. He knows how to hit people where it hurts, which is like... villain behavior coded(sorry, I can't remember the precise word for this). But none of the characters are presented as wholly evil in this cast, so even if Whit is a mastermind or traitor or some secret third thing, I'm sure "wholly evil" and "wholly good" won't be applicable to any character. That is, after all, one of the themes of ch2.

Yayyyy a top!Whit fan. I'm actually not particularly picky about who the top and bottom is in any of my pairings, and I won't get into the gritty details since this post should remain sfw but does a freaky, emotionally unavailable man like Whit ever truly submit if he does bottom? That man was born to top if only because he is surrounded by a sea of bottoms. I'll tell my friend with the ryoma pfp that you like our convos, I'm sure it'll give him a laugh.

Since you want to remain anon to not appear impolite, I won't tag this in the main tag, but I'll take note that innumerable faces is reread! Also haha, wdym anon fic?(whistles innocently...) I suppose I do have a distinctive style huh? I'm not sure I can do anything with it because that would require me to claim it, but please know that I truly am honored by your kind words!

[pikapeppa]

Hello again! I've got a question for you and I don't think this one will require a full tutorial like the last writing question I asked you 🤣 I know you often juggle multiple fanfics. I'm curious about how you juggle them! Do you focus on one chapter for one fic at a time, do you hop back and forth between fics whenever inspirations strikes, do you alternate or otherwise have any kind of structure you impose on yourself with multiple longfics in progress? I'm currently juggling two longfics, a sequel to my first longfic (Thanks again for all your tutorials that helped me complete that one!!!) plus some pwp oneshots along with the series, and an AU featuring the same pairing.

I'm writing my sequel and the oneshots in past tense and the AU present tense (Don't ask me why I did that to myself 🤣) so when I try to hop back and forth I often get my tenses mixed up. So I've been only focusing on one at a time and alternating them. But I feel like my updates are sparse because of it! I might be updating every 2 weeks, but that means each fic is only getting an update once a month.

I realize I don't owe anyone updates more frequent than I can manage, but I'm all about working smart, not hard. I'd love to hear what works for you in juggling multiple fics!

As always, you're a hero, an inspiration, etc, etc. Thanks for putting your incredible writing into the world and for sharing your methods with the rest of us to make writing seem less overwhelming!!!

Hahahaha so you’re asking this excellent question at a strange time in my writing life where I’m starting to get a little burnt out by my current fic series, and I’m considering whether I need to shift my own writing practices/habits… so this might end up being a longer and more rambly/less helpful answer than you were hoping for. 🤣 And I’ll put it beneath a cut to save everyone’s dashes!

When I’m juggling more than one fic, which is most of the time, my decisions for which one(s) get prioritized basically comes down to this: I work on whichever fic(s) has me the most jazzed at any given time. If I’m equally fired up about more than one fic, I’ll focus on both of them pretty equally, and if there are any additional fics, they’ll get attention when the mood strikes. Sometimes, like when I was juggling Lovers In A Dangerous Time and Where The Winds Of Fortune Take Me, this ended up meaning that each fic got a chapter (or more) every week, because I was equally excited about both fics. But when I was writing for Horizon Forbidden West last year, the fic that got attention fluctuated more depending on where my libido mood lay: I started with my favourite boy Drakka, then got sucked into fleshing out my Kotallo fic while the Drakka fic took second-fiddle for a bit, so I was only adding to it whenever the mood struck. When my Kotallo fic was done, I hyperfocused on the Drakka fic again until I got the idea for my post-Burning Shores Kotallo/Aloy AU, and then for a solid 4-6 weeks, that fic was the only thing I was writing while my beloved Drakka patiently awaited my attention again. 🤣 So there’s no single formula I stick to when it comes to juggling fics; what it really comes down to is that I’ll focus on whichever fic(s) I’m the most jazzed and excited to write. 

Now here’s the thing. At first blush, this might sound obvious; of course I’m working on the fic(s) that I’m the most fired up and excited about. That’s what we fic writers do, right? We’re doing this for the love of the story, in our own time, for free, and we don’t owe anyone anything, so of course we write whatever we personally are most excited about, right?

Not always. For me personally, I’ve gotten into a habit over the years of holding myself to personal deadlines. If I don’t publish at least one chapter of something every week, I feel like a failure or a slacker, or like I'm disappointing my readers. And if I’m working on more than one fic equally, like I’m doing right now with Astarion and Halsin, I feel like a failure if I haven’t put out a chapter for both fics each week. 

This is not a good habit. It’s not a nice way to think about my own writing, and it’s not nice to myself to hold myself to this kind of standard. The reason I mention this is that you mentioned concerns that your updates are getting sparse because of the alternating, so I can see that you’re starting to get into the holding-yourself-to-deadlines habit — and I can speak now from experience that this is a mindset that you don’t want to get entrenched in, if you can avoid it, because it’s starting to make me feel bad about myself as a writer for literally no good reason. 

I get the idea of wanting to work smarter, not harder. But when it comes to fic writing, I worry that the smarter-not-harder attitude is a symptom of hustle culture, of trying to get more done in less time -- and I can’t lie, that worries me a little, because fic writing is a labour of love in the truest sense of the word. It is work, hard work sometimes, and it takes time and passion, and I worry that aiming to hit update deadlines will take away from the reasons that you started doing this in the first place. I genuinely think that the best and healthiest way to think about this is that you — and I! — should focus on the story/stories that you are the most excited about. If you’re loving all three of your fics equally, then alternate between them! Don’t beat yourself up for mixing the tenses (it happens, it’s a whole ass mood 🤣) or for the updates being sparse! Just work on what sparks joy, and enjoy the creative journey! Importantly, importantly, you do not owe updates to anyone, including to yourself, so the joy of the writing really should be the focus. 

I hope this doesn’t come off as being too preachy; if it is, just chalk it up to me telling these things to myself as much as I am to you. 🥰🙏 

I honestly have no idea if this is helpful, but maybe it’ll be a little insightful? And if anything, maybe you can be encouraged by the fact that your heroes are flawed and fallible too! Or maybe it’ll be a disappointing ‘don’t meet your heroes’ thing hahahaha. But I hope not. 🤣💀

— all the love and support from your friendly neighbourhood Pika! xoxo

[cuubism]

Fic Talk!

Tagged by @hardly-an-escape and @five-and-dimes 🥰

How many wips do you have currently?

Mmmmm. 21. this is actually low for me!

Not counting old Malec wips still lingering...

Which one are you finding the hardest to finish? Why do you think that is?

All Shadowhunters stuff - simply fell out of that fandom and even though I like what I had so far for those fics, it's hard to get back into the headspace of working on them.

For Sandman, it's usually long fics. Finishing the last chapter of In Waking Dreams has been hard because we've gotten past the climax / main driving point of the fic so now it's in wrap up - but how to wrap up? 🤔 I need to go back and reread it some time. I work on it slowly. Also Deja vu -- I just love it so much and want it to be right but it's emotionally heavy -- hence hasn't been updated in a year. Rip.

I want to finish my favorite WIPs before season 2 airs because new seasons of shows usually derail my process on existing fics and sometimes drop me out of the fandom entirely. It's happened before.

What does it usually look like when inspiration strikes for you?

Write a huge chunk of a thing all at once ignoring all other responsibilities. Sometimes it does get finished quickly - Morphology and equestrian au were both ones I just pushed through and finished in like a day. This is rare, though. Normally to finish fics, I find you do have to work through moments when you aren't as inspired about them. But ride the inspiration as long as you can when it comes.

Do you curate playlists for each fic or is your process different?

Nightingales, spy AU, Deja vu, 80s fic and a few others all have very specific playlists associated with them. Some fics don't, just by happenstance.

Do you go balls to the wall and write as you go or are you more organized?

Most of the time outlining kills my interest in the thing. But having an endpoint for the story is helpful. I write kind of at random, but more in a front to back direction than the opposite. Often if I write ending scenes first, I end up having to completely rewrite them later 🤷‍♀️

tagging @the-apocrypha, @pellaaearien, @beatnikfreakiswriting, if you want 🙂

[hardly-an-escape]

fic talk! tagged by @cliophilyra!

How many wips do you have currently?

oh god, please don't ask me. at least two BuckTommy fics (which may end up converging into one because they seem increasingly related). a half dozen or so Dreamling stories. a random Witcher fic and a random Stranger Things fic. a long-neglected Clintasha fic. I refuse to do this math.

Which one are you finding the hardest to finish? Why do you think that is?

it's hard to say. I'm a slow writer to begin with, and I (obviously) have the tendency to start new things without having finished previous projects. I definitely struggle more with longer/multichapter fics, and more complex stories in general. would you go along with someone like me? and The Trenches Have Vanished Under the Plough both fit into those categories, and those are the two that have probably given me the most trouble over the past year.

What does it usually look like when inspiration strikes for you?

it usually starts with a single short scene, or sometimes even a single line, that's basically just a vivid daydream until I get it actually written down and expand on it. often someone's tumblr post or headcanon will spark something for me, or a piece of fanart, or some other show/movie I've watched recently will make me think of an AU idea. but it's like pulling teeth to get whatever it is out of the daydream and into a document.

Do you curate playlists for each fic or is your process different?

I've never really gotten into this, but I think it's such a cool idea. I know folks who have particular playlists to get them into the headspace to write certain stories, and I love that concept. but for whatever reason, my brain doesn't really connect stories I'm writing to music in quite that fashion. I do like to have some kind of background noise while I'm writing, but it has to be instrumental (I'll get distracted by lyrics) and fairly unobtrusive.

Do you go balls to the wall and write as you go or are you more organised?

mostly balls to the wall, but I have found it rewarding recently to outline a little bit more. I do it very simply, basically a series of bullet points describing key events or conversations, or sometimes even just a character's reaction or attitude. I do tend to jump around and write non-chronologically, so it can help me visualize what's still left to write and what order it comes in. sometimes I'll go back and drop in a bullet point because I realize I want to expand on a scene or add in a reference, so I can quickly pencil in that note before I lose my train of thought and then flesh it out later. but yeah, mostly I'm just pantsing it!

no pressure tags: @cuubism @valeriianz @peppermintquartz @tryan-a-bex @beatnikfreakiswriting