#inherently a bit disappointing I think

[arolesbianism]

Everyday I see another youtube video or whatever say smth along the lines of "this character is badly written because they're unlikable/annoying/insert negative description here" and everyday I end up massively disappointed because I came here for analysis on the actual writing of a character not just a description of the feelings they made you experience

[windsroad]

oh so buffy is going the "vampires are inherently evil because they have no souls" route... that's... a bummer

[qiu-yan]

once again, instead of being a bitch on someone else's post, i'll keep my thoughts on my own blog.

i've seen people contrast yunmeng shuangjie by arguing that, while wei wuxian comes across as a rebel and jiang cheng comes across as highly mindful of social norms, in reality their social abilities are the opposite: that, in reality, it is wei wuxian who is socially apt and jiang cheng who is socially incapable.

for some fans, this then translates into political ability. these fans argue that it is wei wuxian and not jiang cheng who is capable of making connections.

come on now. this makes no sense. in fact, i'd go as far as to say that the story of MDZS as it is written is only possible if jiang cheng is actually better at making long-term connections - political connections - than wei wuxian.

certainly, wei wuxian is more personable and fun to interact with than jiang cheng; certainly, if everyone was a kid on a school playground, then most of the other kids would probably prefer to play with wei wuxian over jiang cheng. and yet, the world of MDZS is a bit more complicated than a school playground. wei wuxian might be more friendly and social than jiang cheng, but in no way does this translate to actual political ability.

it is true that wei wuxian most likely made a large number of friends at the cloud recesses lectures (such as one nie huaisang), before he was expelled for punching jin zixuan. one might then want to call these friendships future political connections. based on this, one might then expect that, after leaving yunmeng jiang to protect the wen remnants, wei wuxian would have some connections to cash in on.

and yet, this did not happen. where were these supposed "connections" when wei wuxian left yunmeng jiang to defend the wen remnants? where were these "connections" when wei wuxian was living in the burial mounds with no one but a bunch of escaped POWs, all for the sake of what was just? and where were these supposed "connections" when the entire cultivation world showed up on wei wuxian's doorstep, calling for his head?

the whole point of the first chronological half of the story is that wei wuxian stood alone. when wei wuxian chose to do what was right over what was easy, he stood alone. when wei wuxian chose to protect the innocent, he did so alone. and when wei wuxian refused to give up on the wen remnants, severing his single strongest political tie in the process - he ended up standing alone against the rest of the cultivation world. no one came to save him. no one even came to stand by him. none of the connections he made before his downfall as the yiling patriarch - save for one, which only stepped up after he died once - actually ended up lasting.

therefore, one can only conclude that, for all his friendliness and inherent likability, wei wuxian actually isn't all that great at forming and maintaining useful political connections. no matter how much people might like him at first, for almost everyone, he's ultimately too politically inconvenient to stand up for.

(funnily enough, the fact that almost all of wei wuxian's connections save a handful were fair-weather friends is highlighted by wei wuxian himself, in the following exchange during the second siege:

One of the cultivators standing at the forefront of the formation said, with bitter grief, “Wei Ying, you truly disappoint me. To think I used to admire and look up to you! I even said that, if nothing else, you were a founder, someone who established the first generation of your own sect. It’s almost nauseating, in retrospect. From now on, you and I stand in opposition!” Wei Wuxian was taken aback by this speech at first but then burst into hysterical laughter. “Ha ha ha ha….” He laughed so hard he could barely breathe. “You admired me? You say that, but why did I never see you, back when you admired me? And when everyone began to bay for my blood, you popped up waving your little flag to cheer in support!”

MDZS Seven Seas translation, Book 4, Chapter 18: Night Flight)

meanwhile, the plot of MDZS is fully impossible if jiang cheng is bad at making political connections. first, consider what happened right after the massacre of lotus pier: the golden core transfer happened, wei wuxian was thrown into the burial mounds, and then three months later jiang cheng and lan wangji found him again. by that point, jiang cheng had already called enough new disciples to his banner that yunmeng jiang was considered a contributor to the sunshot campaign. given that jiang cheng had literally no one by his side after the fall of lotus pier save jiang yanli, it is highly unlikely that jiang cheng would have been able to recruit this many new disciples if he had no interpersonal skills.

(one could potentially make the case that jiang yanli recruited the new disciples, but i find this difficult to believe. people in this time period would assess the strength of a political organization - one asking them to do something as dangerous as go to war for them - by the quality of that organization's leader. not by the quality of the leader's sister who would have inevitably married out of the organization. sucks to suck but that was how things worked back then.)

furthermore, jiang cheng rebuilt lotus pier. jiang cheng rebuilt lotus pier from literally nothing. some jc antis like to argue that wei wuxian contributed more to the rebuilding of lotus pier than jiang cheng, but this is absurd: wei wuxian was only around during the postwar period for 1-2 years at most before he left for the wen remnants, and a few years after that he was dead. after wei wuxian's defection, and then in the 13-year time period between wei wuxian's death and his resurrection, who was left in lotus pier? was in charge of lotus pier? who was running lotus pier so efficiently that, by the time of wei wuxian's resurrection, yunmeng jiang had gone from what wang lingjiao called a joke to one of the strongest sects in the jianghu?

of course - none other than jiang cheng.

this level of political rebuilding, for an organization that was literally decimated less than 20 years ago, is only possible if the leader of said organization is highly politically capable. during the 13 year timeskip, jiang cheng as yunmeng jiang's leader would have had to deal with rival sect leaders, make alliances with other sects, strike deals with other sects, and keep a constant awareness of the political landscape. all of this is only possible if jiang cheng is capable of making useful political connections. frankly, i think fans are putting too much emphasis on jiang cheng's surface-level mannerisms (which he also is only showing because wei wuxian is around, lbr), and too little focus on simple logic. if jiang cheng did not have the ability to make political connections, then yunmeng jiang would have collapsed.

it's easy to read MDZS and conclude, based on a surface-level analysis, that wei wuxian is better at making connections than jiang cheng. yet this take is at best shallow and at worst actively misses all the main points of the novel. for all his charisma, sociability, and wittiness, wei wuxian is actually not that socially apt - if he were, he and the wen remnants would not have died. and - for all of his snappishness, grumpiness, and irritability - jiang cheng is actually not a social klutz - if he were, yunmeng jiang would not have survived to see wei wuxian's resurrection.

the socially-apt underdog you're thinking of is jin guangyao.

(also, as an aside: nie huaisang did not mastermind wei wuxian's resurrection because he was, secretly all along, wei wuxian's ~great friend~ who was just so sad and disappointed about what happened to poor wei-xiong. it's a nice bit of fanon, but that's not what happened. nie huaisang masterminded wei wuxian's resurrection - 13 years after wei wuxian's death, i might add - because of wei wuxian's expertise. he needed someone with wei wuxian's specific expertise to both solve the nie mingjue dismembered corpse problem and to get revenge for him on jin guangyao. i don't know where bleeding heart huaisang came from, but it certainly wasn't canon.)

[sweetheartsnips]

Saiyans x Virgin Reader HCs

In honour of me being back on tumblr after like 6 years here are some short HCs for my fav Saiyans x virgin reader that I threw together while eating lunch. 

Not inherently explicit but 18+

A/N : you can probably expect more of this kinda stuff from me in between my more substantial stuff on ao3 from now on because I am possessed and have too many thoughts.

Goku 

Goku has quietly been waiting for you to bring up the topic for quite a while. He has tried to be subtle (but if Goku is anything it is definitely not subtle) with touches that linger a bit too long to innocent: squeezing your hips, thigh holding that goes a little too high, and eyes that wander over your body with that hungry look of his. Of course, he would be patient, just for you, and would wait until you were comfortable enough giving yourself to him in that way.

“Really? We can do that? Can we go and do it right now?”

Goku would get lost in the opportunity to show you how much he likes you in such a physical way. He works with his hands, after all. 

He would get so distracted– he would be so excited just for foreplay. Running his hands over your body greedily, going down on you like the himbo glutton he is. He would be so happy just like this, he would almost forget about the main event. 

A very vocal partner. Mostly just gibberish about how soft and wet you are, and how pretty you look. He would go all out to make you feel good (he has crazy stamina) and would make you scream at least a few times. 

Vegeta

Vegeta by nature is confident, dominant and has control of the entire situation. He wouldn’t ever tell you, but he has planned everything out to minimise any risk of disappointing you. He wants your first time to be perfect so as to not bruise your image of him. 

He is also quite possessive, and the thought that you are trusting him and him alone with this feeds his pride immensely. 

He is quite cocky, but also has the ability to please you to back it up. 

“I’m the only one that can give you this, let me take care of you.”

Would tease you for hours beforehand if you let him: it amuses him to see you squirm and beg. He can read your body like a map, exploiting all of your sensitive spots. 

“You’ve gone from so demure to so needy, I’ve ruined you already, haven’t I?” 

He wants you to think you’re lucky for having the opportunity to be intimate with a prince, but he actually feels grateful that you’re allowing him to be your first. 

Gohan

Gohan would be incredibly flustered when you ask him to be your first.

“Are you sure? I don’t want to disappoint you..”

Although ever humble, he is so flattered that you would choose him to take your virginity. He would take you on a date beforehand, give you oodles of affection and make sure the occasion is as comfortable and relaxing for you as possible.

Surprise! Once he is in bed with you he becomes a mess. Little whimpers and moans, his skin flushed but cool with sweat as he presses his body against you. 

“You feel so good…you look so perfect. Does that feel good, sweetheart?” 

Is entirely focused on you, and doesn’t draw things out for too long. He wants to please you, to be good for you. 

He watches your face closely, using your expressions and sounds as a guide, slowly becoming more and more sure of himself. Once he is sure you’re enjoying yourself, he finds it much easier to slip and lose himself in his own pleasure.

Gohan also gives the best aftercare ever.

Future Trunks

Trunks is a gentle lover, as gentle as they come. When you ask him to be your first, he would be over the moon, and excited to show his affection for you. 

“I promise I’ll make it good for you. We can do everything exactly as you want.”

Trunks would worship your body with caresses and kisses beforehand, taking things slowly to build your anticipation and show you how much he cares. His touch would be gentle, full of love and reverence. He doesn’t get the chance to show you often, between time travel and all. 

He would take you in missionary, cupping the side of your face and get lost in your pleasure-dazed eyes. As he senses your growing need, his touch will gradually become more firm and confident, feeding off of the way your body takes him. 

Trunks also moans pretty. 

“It’s like you were made for me…I’m so lucky.”

Afterwards, Trunks would hold you close, letting you rest against his muscly chest. Forehead kisses, savouring your smell. 

“Thank you for being mine.”

Broly (Super) 

Broly is initially confused.

“Your…first? First to do what?” 

When you sheepishly explain to him he goes as red as a tomato. It seems it would be his first time too. 

Your size differences would make things a little awkward to navigate first, but you end up being most comfortable underneath him, caged underneath his hulking body. He likes to have you like this: as if he is keeping you safe and shielding you from the world. Despite his imposing demeanour, he is a blushing mess– nervous and afraid of messing up.

Broly lets you take the lead a bit. He is very careful in foreplay, letting you guide him to ensure your safety and comfort. He is a little afraid of hurting you, and this is reflected in his timid actions, but he soon comes out of his shell with your reassurances.

He loves the taste of your skin, the warmth of your body. He is so touch-deprived that with each little brush of your skin against his he has to stifle a whine. 

Broly finds it difficult to find the right words to say, instead choosing to show you how much he enjoys you with his hands.

[save-the-villainous-cat]

"I saw you on TV," the villain said. They stared down at the hero. The hero they had bound to one of the incredibly old machines in the warehouse, the hero who had daringly followed them right into a trap. "It was quite...interesting. If I am allowed to say that."

"Interesting how?" they asked but didn't meet the villain's eyes. Surely, the responsibilities the hero had to bear were crushing them and the villain, despite their absolute distaste for people who pretended to be saviors, was fascinated by the true devotion the hero offered. To everyone.

"You looked like a prophet almost. With your heroic speech, your kind words. My god, you almost convinced me that humanity is inherently good. And with all those people around you? It’s a miracle no one tried to jump on top of you and give themselves voluntarily to our saviour."

"You mean the charity event?" The hero sighed and closed their eyes. "Yeah, I told the organizers it was stupid to do it in a public space. People were there for me, not the charity."

"Did it help, though? Was there a lot of money coming in?" The hero raised a suspicious eyebrow and frowned softly.

"Not really. Not until the anonymous donation." The villain couldn't help but be amused by that. That mysterious donation had certainly provided quite a sum.

"You're unhappy?"

"I'm not exactly...satisfied with my work. I wanted to prove to people that it’s not me who stands for goodness, but that goodness is within everyone. I know that’s cheesy, but…" They took another breath in and the villain was disappointed by themselves for feeling sorry for the hero.

"You feel like an object?" The villain leaned forward. They were tempted to touch the hero’s wrist or maybe even their jawline. But they refrained. They had known each other for a while now, but that wasn’t an excuse to do as they pleased.

Especially when the hero wasn’t in a position to move away.

The problem was: the villain liked the hero. A lot. A bit too much. They weren’t obsessed, they weren’t greedy when it came to the hero, but they had fallen in love a long time ago and it wasn’t exactly easy to get rid of.

They had tried, but they were too attached to their enemy.

"…yeah. I know that sort of comes with the job. People say…inappropriate things about me and I know people who idolise me can be…a lot sometimes."

"Have you ever been harmed by a fan? Touched?"

"…a few times, yeah. I mostly brushed it off." The hero pursed their lips. And the villain’s eyes widened. "I try not to think about it."

"Do you know who…?"

"If I told you, that person would be dead by tomorrow." Wrong, they’d be dead in a few hours, but alright. The villain understood that reasoning. They understood the hero would protect citizens at all costs. "And I also don’t know them."

They stared at each other.

"So…how can I help protect you, then?" the villain asked. They shifted a little, unsure what they expected as answer.

"What?"

"How can I help protect you?"

"Oh…uh…" The hero laughed awkwardly.

"I can hire someone, if you-"

"A hero who needs a bodyguard is a little pathetic, don’t you think?" the hero asked. The villain watched them swallow. They looked a little pale.

"Even if it’s me?"

"You’re being serious about this?"

"I could…ignore my usual activities for your social events and make sure you can preach all your horrible goodness," the villain suggested. They shrugged but still blushed horribly.

"Wha-why?"

"Yes or no? You have three seconds to decide. Three, two-"

"Alright, fine." The hero laughed and this time, they seemed actually happy. "I’ll see you on Monday, then."

"Good." The villain left immediately and tried to ignore their enemy as best as they could.

In the end, the hero had to get out of the trap all by themselves.

[beifong-brainrot]

So um. I genuinely don't have many thoughts on the live action atla. It looks fine.. i guess

Except. Zuko's scar.

It's so... underwhelming. Like yeah it's there. It's red and it has a little bit of texture. But I guess i was hoping the live action would make it a little more prominent.

Like I'm a burn victim myself, who very much went through a similar struggle Zuko did. Where i felt like my scars define me. This. This feels not like what i hoped for. They even let him keep his eyebrow 😤

And I'm hoping that it's just because it wasn't practical to go all out with it. Like it was too expensive to put full prosthetics and special effects on such a young actor for every shoot.

But i have this sinking feeling in my gut that its because he's 'meant to be attractive'. Or even more heartbreakingly, that making it bigger would be considered too 'gory' or 'body horror'.

And im just tired of seeing scars and other 'deformities' as being seen as something to only be shown in full capacity in horror movies. That it would be too visceral or too 'gross' to fully show. It reinforces the idea that people like Zuko, people like me have something inherently disgusting and ugly about us. That our features have to be toned down in order to be palatable to a wider audience.

I remember seeing Zuko for the first time as a kid and seeing a part of myself that was rarely represented. I was bullied for my skin grafts as a child. Of course i was, kids are cruel. But seeing Zuko go through the struggles i went through and to have him find people who didn't treat him differently was so important to me. Like to me, that part of his story was arguably more important than his redemption arc.

And seeing Zuko seen as attractive by people in the fandom was also a profound experience. Because it felt like i could too exist in my full burnt chicken nugget glory and still be treated as a full person. Not looked at with pity or disgust.

So that's why live action Zuko's scar is such a disappointment to me.

I have other thoughts on the atla remake but really, they don't matter that much, since i don't think ill be watching it

[fishing-lesbian-catgirl]

I occasionally see people complain that stereotypes of trans women even in our own online communities are often about us being nerdy shut ins, and how they say that’s unfair and inaccurate. But besides the obvious selection bias that in online spaces people who are shut ins that spend most of their time online are going to be more prevalent than those who spend less time online, I feel like it takes a bit of willful ignorance to pretend that nerdy shut ins don’t make up a very large portion of transgender women for very material reasons. Most of the transgender women I know have a few things in common:

We grew up uncomfortable with our bodies

We spent most of our lives prior to transitioning feeling like something is very wrong and feeling like we don’t fit in with most of society

We frequently fantasized about a life that could be different

Again there is a very real amount of selection bias in this because basically every trans woman I know is also mentally ill and spends most of her time online. But again I feel that the material reality of being a person who feels uncomfortable with themselves, feels like they don’t belong, and often fantasizes about a life where they didn’t have those problems very much would cause said person to gravitate towards being nerdy and/or a shut in. And that is intensified if you consider the statistically higher percentage of trans women that are autistic (the autism-transgender connection is a whole different topic but there is a statistically significant overlap). To a person like that, video games, tabletop role playing, and online communities where you can present yourself how you’d like are all very attractive things. And if so many of us gravitated to those things before transitioning, existing in this world that is so deeply cruel and unaccepting of trans women only pushes us further into using those as our outlets.

I won’t pretend to have any statistical or other knowledge to make sweeping statements about that making up the majority of us or anything, and I also recognize there is selection bias inherent to this discussion and that my view is limited as an American white woman. But I will say that I don’t think it should be necessarily surprising or disappointing to anyone that online communities of transgender women tend to focus on talking about the types of transgender women that make up the majority of those communities: the ones who spend more time online

[existence-is-a-pain87]

TOON HANDLERS THAT GET Y/N a PET!!!

Arthur thinks that there should be more than just Pebble and Coal for pets, kids like cats right? So he goes to Delilah and asks to make a little kitty, just to test the waters,

Austin is a bit worried since the cat seemed to start hissing at other toons.. (mostly the Yandere mains) ((including Astro)) and tried to get the cat to leave them alone, but Astro is so excited! He’s read books about step parents and wants to start acting like a step-dad to the cat, who hisses at him and swats at him.

Dandy is MAAAAAAD, how DARE Sam, and Devan team up to make that HELLSPAWN hATE HIM. Shut UP about the cat liking Pebble, that’s because Pebble is warm and a good walker so the cat can nap on his back while Pebble runs around!! Devan thinks it’s funny as shit as Pebble runs around with the cat and Dandy’s chasing pebble to try and get rid of the cat

Sam is excited to know the cat does infact, hate Sprout, they give the kitty treats when Sprout is being a lil too pushy and the cat hissed at him to bring him down a notch, the cat is anti-sprout trained /j

Shannon and Shelly are pretty cool w/ the cat, the cat just wants space, and Shelly likes dressing the cat up in saber tooth tiger costumes! Shelly and y/n have fashion show with prehistoric cat costumes. (Shelly’s favorite is the matching T-Rex onesie)

Veronica and Vee have figured out how to get the cat to love them, when Vee gets a lil too hot, the cat likes to nap on her, so Vee downloads a bit too much, and she’s pretty warm most of the time, and the cat is pretty chill if it can nap on Vee’s head while she’s on a game show.

(OC/theorized Handlers)

Bailey and Bobbett are put off by the cat being so cool with Coal, the two have a secret language and Bobbett knows it!!! She’s gonna find out WHAT they’re saying (Coal and the Cat have matching collars)

Birdie and Bassie are pretty okay with it, (Bassie likes how the cat instinctively chases Cocoa around bc bunny = food) and Birdie thinks it’s cute how the cat climbs into Bassie’s head.

…

The cat keeps the rats away, it’s the only thing left of the handlers… many would much rather keep the cat because of that..

Oooh! Good idea! Lemme add what I think would happen:

Oh also, an image of MC's cat.

Ooooooh! I wonder who this little guy is? MC named him Grim.

Oh, also he talks and breathes fire. Isn't he cute?

--☆☆☆--

- Authur, trying to be a decent father to you because that's basically what he is, heard about how you were uncomfortable with the Toons obsessing over you.

- So he went to Delilah to make you your own personal companion you can talk with who will never be obsessed with you, at most just a clingy animal.

- And he went with a cat. Specially the image of a cat you drew once and called Grim.

- They matched Grim's personality to what you described him as. Arrogant, childish, loud. Desperate to be a great mage and have respect even if all he can to is breathe fire. A little glutton. Capable of standing on his hind legs and walking around like that. And talks a ton, often making cat sounds or "myah"s as he speaks.

- Both Delilah and Authur were happy when you were thrilled to get Grim, and even more so when you two got close quickly and Grim called you his "hench-toon".

- Authur was concerned with Grim's clinginess until Delilah clarified Grim is just inherently protective of you, but not obsessed. That was a major relief.

- So you had your own little buddy now! He'd help you with deliveries and let you talk with him and snuggle him. It was great!

- Everyone else had differing opinions though.

- Okay, firstly, the Toon handlers though Grim was adorable. Sure, he was loud and fussy, but he was the only Toon here that hung around you without being obsessed as fuck.

- Sam was a little annoyed by Grim, but didn't complain much. After all, Grim was cute and wasn't as much as a fire-hazard as Sam was concerned.

- Shanon thought the little guy was the cutest thing ever and was disappointed Grim refused to let her hug him. Then you told Grim to let her hug him and she was happy.

- Veronica (I headcanon her as a cat person) fucking ADORES Grim. She buys him so many cans of tuna just to see his little grin when he gets all happy to see the tuna. (Veronica is also Grim's favorite handler for this fact).

- Austin doesn't like Grim too much. Mostly due to how Grim is super loud and fucking HATES Austin for trying to make Grim's hench-Toon hang around that Astro guy. Can't he see you don't like Astro that much?? Is Austin blind?? Yeah, Grim hisses at Austin a ton.

- Devan, despite being more of a dog person, thinks Grim is cute. Sure, Grim is loud and annoying, but Devan's just happy you have more friends and there's someone helping you out now.

- Sorry I'm not gonna do fan Toon handlers (I'm sorry pookie </3)

- Dandy fucking HATES Grim.

- Yeah we doing Toons now.

- Just the mains, Dandy, and MC's canonical friends

- But Dandy hates Grim. Grim is basically the opposite of you, and Grim keeps trying to light Dandy on fire whenever he gets close. Dandy doesn't like this cat at ALL.

- Astro is very apprehensive of Grim. Sure, Grim is just trying to protect you, but Astro is a little uncomfortable with you keeping a troublemaker like this as company... First Shrimpo, now this?

- Shelly likes Grim. Grim is cute, doesn't fight back outside of verbal complaints when you and her dress him up, and plays along for when you and Shelly hang out. The two are in fact friends.

- Sprout and Grim barely tolerate eachother. Sprout due to the fact Grim help keeps Dandy away from you and Grim due to the fact Sprout feeds him. They're by no means friends. More sort-of allies.

- Vee doesn't pay much mind to Grim. Grim doesn't explicitly despise her and she just doesn't bother him too much. Barely know eachother, however Grim will go to Vee if he needs an answer to something about you.

- Pebble and Grim have BEEF.

- Brightney is concerned with how stupid Grim is. She's sitting him down and teaching him canned tuna is the same as the fish right now.

- Glisten honestly thinks Grim is adorable. Grim doesn't wear makeup much, but it's always because of Glisten when he does. Grim and Glisten are friends.

- Shrimpo HATES Grim. But Shrimpo hates everyone. Honestly, Shrimpo just hates how Grim takes up more of your attention, but calms down a bit when he realizes you still care about him.

- Finn won't stop making fish puns to Grim and Grim is crying to you about it.

- Blot, Looey, and Yatta all are trying to convince you AND Grim to do a performance with them now. Grim would make a great firebreather, wouldn't he? Because he literally can just breathe fire.

- Ginger doesn't see Grim much, but the two are friends. She thinks he's precious.

- Dazzle adores Grim even if he's noisy. Razzle's just happy you have a friend who makes you AND Dazzle happy!

- Teagan is amused by how Grim eats most of the snacks at your guy's tea parties.

- Grim is scared of Tisha since she will sit him down and give him a bath if he gets dirty. He does NOT test her.

- Basically, Grim's your little buddy! Isn't he precious?

[saetiate]

itoshi sae x reader comfort, established relationship. cw: mentions of reader's past trauma and past physical abuse. reader has grown up with 19 years of abusive trauma (this is the only specific bit and is only said once, the rest is general). sae is aware of this trauma, so he does not have his usual possible 'cruelty' (shall we say) that you might associate with him depending on how you characterize him. he is trying on purpose for you. selfship coded but written generally

a plate falls. a pang that for once, sounds soft, in a way it never has before. not like it did the first nineteen years in your life, making your heart jackrabbit, a deafening noise that followed a deafening silence that would follow with deafening screaming.

a plate falls from the side of the counter to the floor, you move but you don't catch it in time. you watch it tip and spin and fall and you know your heart is meant to fall with it but this time, the absence of it feels off. there's that silence you know all too well, a silence that would usually fill your stomach with dread, that you know follows with having you at your knees, bent over with pain shooting through your body over and over again, your crying body still staring at the broken fragments.

there's none of that. there is a hand, but it is nothing like the hands before. it is gentle at the crux between your neck and your shoulder. the squeeze it gives is comforting.

how strange, to be granted with something like that, something like comfort and warmth, for a mistake you made. how strange, that comfort can feel like a cut, something you know is inherently wrong — your brain mismatching the feelings given with the ones you hold.

you know, that being given comfort is not meant to make you feel this strange, curling feeling, like the fear of falling. it doesn't change how you feel. you know and you have learned and that in of itself doesn't heal anything. how messed up is that?

there's a shuffling, and then a paper bag is being given to you. you move, then, crouching to grab at the pieces. sae's hand waves in front of you for a moment. you don't know what he sees, you don't dare to look at him. you don't want to know if it's filled with pity, or disappointment. it's probably neither, given his usual nonchalant demeanor, but you can't risk it. you can't risk looking.

whatever he sees, he doesn't move to stop you this time (he has before. before, he has held your hands in his and asked you to sit down. before, you were a shaking rabbit in his arms with tears biting your lower lashline and a trembling lip. today is not that day. it's finally, not that day anymore). he helps you instead. there's a broom in your hands, and then a wet towel, and then…

and then the floor is clean.

"food's on the table." his voice is calm, despite everything. despite everything? what's that supposed to mean? why does a thought like that still cross your mind?

"that's what you were going for, right?" he continues. you're staring at the floor, where the plate had been. if you hadn't been, you'd notice the way he was trying to meet your gaze. "to put some food on a plate and on the table?"

"yeah. thank you."

"did you want a drink too?" he hums noncommittally. "i can make something."

"no, it's fine. i can do it myself."

i can do it myself. this time, you mean it. this time, it's really true. said with a kind of conviction.

he looks at you for a second, and then there's a gentle "okay."

"are you mad at me?"

you ask him this at the table, a whole ten minutes of silence after the whole ordeal.

"why would i be?" he tilts his head. that's the thing about sae, his words tend to be genuine. blunt, sometimes, but he doesn't tend to lie. when you look at him, you can find no hidden motives, no matter how hard you search.

"it's normal," he continues. he sounds like he's been thinking of how to say it, rotating the words in his mind like a hamster wheel. his mouth moves with unsurety, eyebrows furrowed, so foreign in comparison to his usual grace. "to drop things sometimes."

normal. you remember the bowl that sae himself had broken just a couple months ago, how it split into two pieces in the sink. how he had even given his version of a joke about how there's only one of these bowls left, because rin had broken the same one half a year ago when he came to visit, and you had broken that bowl over a year ago, the time he had held your shaking hands.

the meal finishes. he clears the plates and does the dishes. he sits with you on the sofa and you watch a show together.

there's no punishment. there's no yelling. there's a blanket draped over you both and his arm around yours and the afternoon sun.

normal, he calls it. but even after all these years, the warmth feels new to you all the same. there's an upside, of course. you find it like sunlight passing through the trees. that being: you're able to be grateful for it, to hold him close and bask in it.

author's note: i thought about not adding the 19 years bit but... i couldn't phrase this in a way that made me happy without it.

wow, exposing my traumatic and abusive childhood to the internet. i was indeed in a cycle of abuse for the first nineteen years of my life, physical and mental and emotional and financial all at once from families to friends to significant others, and i'm in my mid 20s now. which means i've spent about 5+ years healing from that. i'm still healing. my heart does not drop at a falling glass anymore. but i notice how it doesn't drop. the absence of it. i wanted to capture that

(also i imagine a lot of people reading this don't know me like that but this is my first time talking about this. i don't want to be seen as having like a victim complex or something? i'm a very independent girl (i have a capricorn moon and rising if that gives context) and this is my writing blog where i am using writing to explore my feelings.)

[passengerprincipessa]

hi im feeling a little bold so

for the kink prompts, if you could something that ressembles multiple orgasms/overstim and/or inexperienced partner with norstappen I would be forever thankful,,, !!

I'd like to see what you come up with! (happy holidays?) <3

i... actually don't know what came over me while writing this. this is a grab bag of kinks from the list including: inexperienced partner, virginity, piercings, and multiple orgasms/overstimulation. also lando has a small dick for no reason (cw: inherent power imbalance because max is a king and lando's his consort in an arranged marriage) (for the kink prompt asks)

Max stops short as he enters Lando’s bedchamber, stunned by the sight that greets him.

Lando’s kneeling in the middle of one of the plush rugs, head bowed, the slim golden crown Max placed on him during the wedding ceremony that morning still nestled in his curls. Lando’s skin is scrubbed clean, glistening with whatever oils the servants rubbed on him, and he’s naked except for the gold metal bars through each of his nipples, a jeweled piercing dangling from his navel. Max knows Lando’s people think piercings are a mark of great beauty, almost unbearably erotic, but Max had foolishly assumed he wouldn’t feel any type of way about them. Seeing them like this, though, delicate and feminine on Lando’s slim, strong form, Max can already feel his cock hardening.

Max drags his eyes down between Lando’s legs, sucking in a sharp breath at the sight of the small cock dangling there—smaller, probably, than Max’s thumb. Max knows small cocks are highly favored when selecting consorts, believed to be a sign that the consort will never pose a threat to the king, and Max is sure the advisors he sent to find his new spouse must have been delighted when they saw Lando’s tiny cock. Max has never cared all that much for old wives' tales, but his mouth waters at the thought of sucking Lando between his lips.

Like this, on his knees, naked and obedient, glittering and golden, Lando looks every bit the perfect consort.

But when Max takes a step into the room, Lando looks up, fear flashing in his eyes.

Max stops, cocking his head, studying Lando. Finally, Max asks, voice soft, “Are you enjoying your chambers?”

“Oh, I—” Lando trails off, blinking at Max with wide eyes. “Why do you care?”

That startles a laugh out of Max but Lando flinches, and Max immediately sobers, watching Lando carefully.

“Lando,” Max says gently. “You’re my spouse.”

Lando frowns, clearly confused. “But you’re—you’re the king.” His eyes drift to the floor. Max can barely hear him as he says, “I thought you would simply want to—fuck me.”

Max’s chest aches at the idea of mounting Lando like an animal, uncaring of whether Lando wants it, Lando’s pleasure. “No, Lando, I—” He frowns, trying to work out the right thing to say.

Finally, Max says, “I have many bed partners. If you do not wish to share my chambers, I will not force myself on you.”

It’s true. Max has never lacked for willing men and women to share his bed, and he’ll respect Lando’s wishes if Lando wants to keep their marriage purely political. Lando was only chosen, after all, because Max needed an alliance with Lando’s people. Max knows no one would look askance if the two of them did not share a bedchamber.

Lando’s looking at him with a stunned expression, eyes wide. “You would be alright with that? With not—bedding me?”

“Yes,” Max says, forcing himself to hide any disappointment he might feel. “You’ll have these chambers to yourself and be able to move freely about the grounds. You won’t have to see me apart from formal appearances.”

Lando blinks at him, mouth dropping open.

Max thinks about simply leaving, letting Lando clean the oil off himself and prepare himself for bed. But there’s something in Lando’s expression, something—hungry, that makes Max pause.

Max knows Lando has never been touched before. Max’s advisors informed him that Lando’s people selected him as a potential future consort to a king at age eleven, raised him in a secluded manor house along with a few other candidates. Lando was kept in a chastity belt—Max’s advisors confirmed that Lando’s never been touched, by himself or anyone else.

Max can’t help but wonder if Lando even knows how to touch himself. If perhaps he was never taught how to find his pleasure. Max would teach him. He would teach him gladly, show him exactly how much pleasure his body can feel. He wants to trail his hands over Lando’s sensitive nipples, get his mouth on Lando’s sweet little cock, show Lando how good it can feel to be fucked. 

But Max needs it to be Lando’s choice.

“If you would like,” Max says, softly, carefully, “I could show you how a man takes pleasure in another man.”

Lando takes a shuddering breath and Max flushes when he notices Lando’s tiny cock starting to harden, still unbearably small.

“Would it—feel good?” Lando whispers, still on his knees, still looking up at Max.

“Yes,” Max says simply. “So good, Lando.”

Lando makes a small noise, almost a whimper. His nipples are puckered and hard, pushed out from his chest by their piercings, a bead of wetness sitting on the tip of his cock. Max wants to lick it off.

But he waits, watching Lando carefully. If Lando says no, he’ll leave.

Lando lets out a shaky exhale, tongue darting out to wet his lips. He blinks up at Max and whispers, “Show me.”

Max’s cock throbs in his trousers, and he brings his hands to his jacket, fingers shaking as he starts to undo the buttons. “Get on the bed,” Max orders, voice strained.

Lando goes obediently, stretching the long line of himself out on the sheets, watching Max carefully as Max approaches the bed, shedding the rest of his clothes.

When Max climbs onto the mattress, sliding between Lando’s legs, Max is stripped bare, his cock thick and hard.

Lando glances down at it, letting out a distressed little whimper, and whispers, “Big.”

Max’s cock throbs, but he laughs, softly. “It’s not,” he murmurs, because it isn’t. It’s perfectly average. “I think yours is just small.”

Lando flushes, opening his mouth to protest. 

Max smoothes a hand over Lando’s thigh. “It’s alright,” Max says softly. “I like it.”

With that, Max bends down to suck Lando’s cock into his mouth.

Lando’s entire body seizes up, mouth dropping open on a silent cry. When Max drags his tongue over the head, lapping up Lando’s pre-come, a shiver runs through Lando and he lets out a sweet little, “Oh,” body twisting, hands flying up to grab at his stomach, his pecs, his nipples.

“You can come whenever you feel like it,” Max murmurs, pulling off, breath ghosting over Lando’s spit-slick cock. “Want to make you feel good.”

Lando whimpers, blinking down at Max. “I haven’t—I don’t—” He breaks off on another whimper, looking at Max with a helpless expression.

“Fuck,” Max groans, pressing a kiss to Lando’s little dick, startling a moan out of Lando. “You’ve never come before?”

Lando lets out a desperate whine, but he shakes his head.

“God, that’s—” Max doesn’t say anything more, just sucks Lando’s cock back into his mouth, dragging sharp little cries and moans from Lando’s shivering form.

Lando seems to be getting closer, back arching off the bed, thighs trembling, wetness spilling onto Max’s tongue.

“Max,” Lando gasps, and Max moans at the sound of his name in Lando’s mouth, at the sight of Lando coming undone under his tongue. “Max, please—oh—it’s too—” Lando breaks off on a gasp, hips fucking up, his cock so small that it’s still barely anything in Max’s mouth.

Lando’s crying out, shivering and trembling, face scrunched up. “It’s too much,” he whimpers, still thrusting frantically into Max’s mouth. “Max, I can’t, it’s—”

Max ignores him, just sucks hard on Lando’s cock, moaning when Lando’s whole body draws tight, his stomach shuddering, the piercing in his navel jangling with each panting breath.

“Oh,” Lando gasps. “Oh, it’s—” He goes utterly silent, back arching high off the bed, head tossed back. Max licks over the head of Lando’s cock, watching Lando closely, wanting to see the exact moment Lando falls apart for the first time, wanting to watch as Max is the first person to bring Lando to his peak.

Lando’s hovering right on the edge, silent and tight, brows drawn together, like he wants to come, needs to come, but doesn’t know how to find it. Max slides a hand up Lando’s stomach, up to his chest, and brushes a thumb over the dusky bud of Lando’s nipple.

Lando falls apart with a sharp cry of Max’s name.

Max moans at the taste of Lando flooding his mouth, whines at the sight of Lando shivering and shaking against the mattress, body writhing and twisting as he rides out his orgasm. Lando doesn’t seem capable of words beyond a desperate chant of Max’s name, his hands flying down to fist in Max’s hair, dragging Max tight against him, riding his orgasm out in Max’s mouth.

“Please, Max, I can’t—oh.” Lando breaks off on a moan, cock spilling a little more into Max’s mouth, and he trembles through it, thighs twitching like he wants to close his legs, push Max away, overwhelmed by the pleasure Max is dragging out of him.

Even after Lando finally stops coming, Max stays where he is, letting Lando’s cock soften in his mouth. He thinks he’d be content to stay between Lando’s legs forever, make Lando come over and over again on his tongue, learning all the noises of pleasure Lando makes.

Eventually, Max makes to pull away, intending to give Lando a respite.

But Lando’s hands tighten in Max’s hair, stopping him from going more than a few centimeters.

“Can you—again?” Lando whispers, looking at Max with a desperate expression.

Max realizes that Lando’s asking Max to suck him again, and Max gazes up at him, awed. “Most men need a break between orgasms,” he murmurs, pressing an apologetic kiss to Lando’s thigh. “It’s too sensitive usually.”

Lando whimpers, but he says, “Could you—try?”

“Lando,” Max breathes, huffing a laugh. He strokes his thumb over Lando’s nipple again, smiling indulgently up at him. “Greedy little thing, aren’t you?”

Lando flushes.

Max doesn’t say anything more, just brings his lips to Lando’s cock. Lando’s clearly oversensitive, whimpering and shivering, twitching toward and away from Max’s mouth. But he doesn’t ask Max to stop, doesn’t do anything except whine Max’s name and, before long, spill against Max’s tongue with a frantic moan. This time, Max doesn’t stop once Lando’s done, just keeps sucking him until Lando’s shaking like a leaf, coming for a third time with a pitiful whimper, spilling a tiny amount of come that Max swallows greedily.

Once Lando’s shuddering and begging Max to stop, hands shoving at Max’s head, Max finally lets Lando slip from his mouth. Lando’s little cock looks even smaller, soft and spent, covered in Max’s spit.

Max moans at the sight, but murmurs, “We can be done.” He presses a kiss to Lando’s lower belly, heat rushing through him when Lando whines Max’s name. “You’ve been so good,” Max adds. “Perfect.”

Lando takes a shaky breath, looking down at Max with hooded eyes. “Is there—I’ve heard that there is—more.”

Max laughs. “Yes, there’s lots more. But it can wait.”

But Lando shakes his head. “I want you to take me,” Lando whispers, looking terrified and determined all at once. “I want you to take me like a—like a king takes a consort.”

“Fuck,” Max groans, hips hitching against the mattress, cock throbbing at Lando’s words. “You would want that?”

“Yes.” Lando swallows, throat bobbing. “Please, Max.”

Who is Max to deny his consort?

Lando’s impossibly tight when Max slips the first finger in him, staring at Max with wide, shocked eyes. But Max takes Lando’s cock in his mouth again and soon Lando’s relaxing, letting Max slip a second finger in. When Lando starts moaning and whimpering, rocking back against Max’s fingers, Max knows he’s ready.

Max rolls them over, ending up on his back with Lando hovering above him, looking down at him with parted lips and lust-dark eyes. The crown’s long since slipped from his curls.

“Like this, I think,” Max murmurs, running his hands down Lando’s sides. “It will have to be your choice,” Max continues.

Lando’s eyes go wide. “Max,” he whispers.

 “You will have to choose,” Max says softly, running his fingers up to Lando’s nipples, playing with the tiny buds, “if you want to offer yourself up to me.”

Lando moans, a jagged, desperate thing, and Max already knows what he’ll choose. Knows it even before Lando reaches behind himself for Max’s cock, knows it before Lando lines Max up, knows it before Lando starts sinking down onto Max’s cock, taking his own virginity, giving himself up to Max.

“God,” Max moans, watching Lando struggle to take him, sinking slowly down his cock. “Look at you.”

Lando whimpers, sinking down a little further. He’s still hard, Max notices, even as he bites his lip, eyes squeezing shut.

“Good boy,” Max breathes, and he rests his hands on Lando’s hips, helping him on his way. “That’s it, good boy.”

Finally, finally, Lando’s in his lap, Max buried inside him to the hilt.

“Move,” Max murmurs. “Fuck yourself on my cock.”

Lando lets out a desperate sob but he starts to move, riding Max hesitantly, carefully, barely moving at all. Max shuffles them up the bed a bit so that Max is sitting up against the headboard, upright enough that Max can free one of his hands to toy with Lando’s nipples, marveling at how sensitive they seem to be with the piercings.

“Max, please,” Lando whines, grinding on Max’s cock. “You have to—I’ll come.”

Max moans, cock twitching inside Lando. “Good, baby,” Max says, voice strained. “I want you to come.”

Lando sobs at that but he keeps fucking himself on Max’s cock, letting Max play with his nipples, the piercing in his navel bouncing as he rides Max.

“Max,” Lando sobs, rim going impossibly tight around Max's cock. “Max, please, fuck, I can’t—”

“Come, baby,” Max murmurs, leaning forward to press his tongue against Lando’s nipple, sucking the metal bar between his teeth.

It’s enough to have Lando stuttering to a halt in Max’s lap, crying out Max’s name. His cock spills a few meager drops of come onto Max’s stomach, rim fluttering weakly around Max, Lando sobbing above him as he comes for the fourth time.

Max doesn’t know how he hangs on, but the moment Lando’s finished coming he rolls them over, Lando on his back underneath Max, face wet with tears.

Max panics for a moment, starting to pull out, but Lando shakes his head frantically, wrapping his legs around Max.

“Please,” Lando begs, crying harder. “Need you to come in me, please, Max.”

Max groans and gets his hands on the backs of Lando’s thighs, pressing them up, fucking him hard and deep, watching Lando cry and beg underneath him. Lando might come again at some point, tensing up underneath him, but he’s been wrung dry, his cock twitching rapidly, nothing coming out. He’s too fucked out to even try to clench around Max, can’t do anything except lay there weakly, worn-out pants of Max’s name.

It’s the sight of Lando coming for a fifth time that pushes Max over the edge and he shoves inside Lando with a deep groan, coming so hard he’s dizzy with it.

After, he pulls Lando on top of him, pressing kisses to Lando’s curls, running his hand over Lando’s back, awed by the man in his bed.

“If you want,” Max murmurs, “we can still have separate bedchambers.”

Lando picks his head up, looking down at Max with an outraged expression. “Why?” Lando snaps. “Why would we not do this every night?”

Max barks out a shocked laugh. “Every night?”

“Fine,” Lando says, giving him a small grin. “Every other night.”

“Every other night,” Max agrees, and pulls Lando in for a slow, soft kiss.

[arolesbianism]

Y'know I generally like all the sephirah core suppressions but Man I wish Binah didn't have the no pause mechanic. She was going to get it anyways later, why did she need it right next to the guy who's main meltdown mechanic involves limiting your ability to pause.

I also just feel like the fight is actually genuinely pretty fun in the way it pushes your micromanagement skills to their limits, and I feel like removing the ability to pause just makes the fight go from a fun management challenge to just kind of stupid. Maybe that's just a skill issue on my part, but still I think her suppression would be a lot less stupidly hard for no good reason and more of a fun challenge if they just removed the no pause part

[definitelynotanalien]

So um I’ve kinda been stuck on epic the musical lately? Always been a fan of greek mythos — had books since I was little — and I adore Percy Jackson as well. Yet I read a few too many of the [character] with porn plots, and I made one for Hermes?

It’s a bit horrid, and I think it’s a tad unrealistic for an irl scenario, but it is meant to be a porn plot? So enjoy.

tw; smut, cheating, implied emotionally abusive relationship, kinda dubcon? don’t rlly think so but labelling it just to be safe, female reader

HOT MAILMAN ALMOST CAUGHT FUCKING CLIENTS SEXY WIFE!? (so funny i’m sry)

“I’m playing games with my friends, get the door!” Your lazy husband calls out from his ‘office’ — really his gaming room after he was fired half a year ago.

You sigh from your spot in the living room, the thin walls barely hiding your disappointment as you walk on new wooden floors, mentally prepared for whichever salesman is here to scam your money.

The light of another bright sunday morning fills your house as you spot the handsome mailman standing on your porch. His eye catching on your lazy pyjamas, your shirt showing off your collarbone and the lack of marks on it.

“I’ve got a parcel for you,” he announces, not passing the box into your hands as he lingers at the door.

He’s a new delivery man, not your usual old guy. He’s young, fit, and more handsome than you'd like to admit. The type of guy who would have you twirled around his finger with his brown curls and tan, as well as his wing earrings. Cute, with a face practically carved from marble.

The dark haired man gives you a fake-confused look as you silently wave him to give you the delivery, motioning him to pass it over, then he walks forward and steps into your home with a sly smile.

As soon as he enters, it starts raining outside — heavy rain — and you notice his lack of other deliveries. You close the door behind him, agreeing that the poor gorgeous man shouldn’t suffer in this presumably short burst of rain.

He notices your wedding ring.

“Have a husband?” He asks, with a knowing smirk.

The name Hermes adorns his name tag, along with fantastical little embellishments that you’re sure aren’t typical for a mailman.

You respond stiffly, “I do.”

“Don’t sound too sure about that.”

You scoff and turn, in a horrible mood because of your bum-of-a-husband and this messenger who seems to be rubbing your lacking marriage in.

“Y’know, we might be stuck inside for a while, how about we get to know eachother better.” He suggests with a friendly tone, approaching you.

You turn around sharply, “My life is per-“, you’re interrupted by a slip on the wooden floors — a new install that wasn’t fully worn in yet. A horrible decision resulting in you landing on top of the golden eyed mailman.

There’s nothing inherently bad about the situation, aside from the fact that you seem to have landed with your crotch on his pelvis. You let out a light, fluttery breath, one that could easily be mistaken for a moan.

You shouldn’t have worn these thin, flimsy pyjamas pants today, and his short-shorts seem less and less appealing as the seconds stretch on.

He grins. He doesn’t smile or smirk, he grins. A cocky, boyish grin that spreads across his face as you pin him beneath you. “When I said we should get to know eachother better, I didn’t mean like this.”

You groan, feeling his growing hardness beneath you as you seem to get soaked from his teasing words.

While this isn’t what you initially expected when you saw that handsome mailman outside your door, you wouldn’t object to this.

You’re a lonely, desperate wife, who’s husband only lazes around and doesn’t give you the pleasure you deserve, and you can feel Hermes’s large ‘package’ beneath you, so you just need more of it.

“Shut up and pull your shorts off.” You command, already unbuttoning the top button. Your rubbing yourself onto him whilst doing so, relentless in your search for completion.

He gladly obliges, unzipping and pulling them off with his boxers, you practically drool at the sight of him, reaching to grab it before he stops you.

Yanking down your pants, he rips off your undergarments and flips the position all at once. It’s impressive, a trick he learnt throughout the years you presume, allowing him to pin your hands by the side of your head.

You’re finally filled after what seems like years of waiting, getting relentlessly pounded into as your now sticky body is pushed up and down against your floorboard, pure thundering pleasure fills your soul. If you had lower-floor neighbours they’d surely complain, luckily you live in a house, unluckily your husband is in the next few rooms over playing video games with his loser friends, and if he hears you then you’re dead. You get wetter.

Hermes makes small, barely audible hums as he fucks you. It’s as if this has no effect on him whatsoever as you writhe beneath him, making more than audible moans.

It feels like finally being whole, united with the one pleasure you've always wanted — needed — in your years of marriage.

“I’ve been wanting to do this for a while,” The dark haired man admits as you desperately claw at his back, it’s a weird sentence seeing as you’ve literally never seen him before, but he doesn’t elaborate.

He lifts you up, literally lifts you into the air with his strong muscled forearms as he stands up, pushing you against the dining table and destroying you on the spot your husband would eat, you wonder how he knows this. Your back is on the table as he stands, giving him easy access to rub his fingers against your clit.

He makes you see stars, pure utter ecstasy. You can feel your vagina throb like a heartbeat as he satisfies your deepest urges. He continues like this for a few moments, when you hear the sounds of video games in the distance stop, and you bite your tongue.

Hermes continues pushing himself in and out of you as you hold your delicious whines back, his golden eyes flickering with a hint of annoyance.

“You're gonna get us caught.” You moan out between breaths, desperately holding your other noises back.

Hermes pouts. Pouts. It’s a bit funny, but what's not funny is how his pace immediately increases. Pounding you with new, god-like speed.

“Let him catch us. Let him see you’re mine.” A bit possessive for a guy you just met, but you suppose you've had worse.

[primofate]

A Shot in The Dark (Chapter 2) Wriothesley x fem!reader

Summary: As the upcoming Weapons Master of the town, you've started to take more responsibilities in your father's shop. Little did you know that taking up this job would cause you to get thrown into the messy world of criminals and the messy world of confusing feelings for the Duke of Meropide.

Warnings: blood and talks about the use of blood for something unconventional, some might find it disturbing.

Read other parts: Chapter 1

Wriothesley didn’t show up.

Not the day after, nor the day after that.

At first you wondered if he was thoroughly offended by you not remembering who he was, but on second thought, he didn’t really seem like the type of guy to be offended by someone—especially you—not remembering his name.

And so the days passed by normally, the usual number of customers, the usual number of people walking in and asking general questions about weapons and the like. No sign of Wriothesley, nor any other “celebrity”.

It was a week after meeting the Duke that the shop door nearly flew off its hinges and in came a man with a sword strapped on his back.

You took one look at him—scraggly beard, mid 40s, head of hair that was somewhat long, but tied back into a small tail—and was immediately transported to a conversation with your father.

“We usually don’t judge books by its covers, Y/N, but you’ll know when to deny service to someone,” your father exclaimed, magnifying glass in one hand, pointed at a piece of metal.

You purse your lips at the statement, watching him quietly, until you had to ask. “What do you mean? How would I know if they were good or bad people? There’s no way to tell in such a short amount of time,”

Your father muses a bit, a slight hum emanating from his chest. He puts the magnifying glass down and meets your gaze. “Sometimes, your instincts just know, my dear,” he smiles a tiny one. “Our talent of fixing any weapon in existence may be a mundane skill…but weapons are powerful things Y/N! There are times where we have to stop and think, will I be doing the right thing if I fix this?”

“Good afternoon,” the man speaks and you blink back to present day. He stands confident in front of the counter and pierces you with his gaze. There is nothing inherently wrong with how he looked, but you could tell he wasn’t from Fontaine, and there was a strange feeling of anxiety trying to surface from the bottom of your stomach.

Instinct, huh?

You smile at the man. “Good afternoon,” you reply, eyes darting up to the hilt of his sword, peeking behind his back. “How can I help you today?”

The man moved with a type of grace and fluidity that told you he was no ordinary citizen. He most likely had been wielding a sword for years. His hand came up to the hilt of his sword and he pulled at it until it came off its scabbard, revealing that the blade was a blood red colour.

You controlled a shiver that ran up your spine as the man laid the peculiar looking sword on the counter. On closer inspection, the hilt was a deep purple. And the blade was a natural red colour—for a moment you thought that it had been dipped in blood—it was, to your knowledge, a katana, and a very beautiful albeit uniquely coloured one. The wear and tear was visible and you knew that this weapon was most likely centuries old. You dare not to touch it.

“What’s wrong with it?” You simply ask, prying your eyes away from the weapon and towards the man.

The man doesn’t show any sign of disappointment nor worry. “It’s not as strong as it previously was,” he explained. “I assume it needs a bit of refinement,”

A bit, was an understatement. It needed A LOT of refinement. It was an old blade, anyone could see that, weapons master or not. Your hands hovered above it and you ask, just as you always do “May I?”

Your hand inched closer as the man nodded and you took time to run your hand over the entirety of the sword. It had…a lot of ill intent. How you could tell, you weren’t quite sure. It was not wholly about its colour, but its aura, and how heavy and tired it looked.

“…I’m sorry, I can’t fix this,”

It’s time for this blade to rest.

You never thought that you would decline someone of service, it just didn’t seem like something that would happen.

“Do you know of Dendrobium flowers?” The man’s voice is rather low, but still smooth and somewhat friendly.

You blink up at him, taken aback by the sudden topic change. “…I can’t say I do,”

He talks, and while he talks he tries to retrieve something from his rucksack. “Dendrobium. A rare and expensive plant, found in Inazuman soil,” he takes a small box and opens it, revealing a blood red flower that you’ve never seen in your life before. “Rumor has it that these plants are watered using blood,”

There’s a small pause. A moment for you to internalize the information he just shared, and you were sure now, that there was something strange going on with your customer.

“…Mmhmm,” you let out quietly with a small nod, not knowing what else to say, feeling the atmosphere in the shop grow colder.

“The bloodier and more brutal the battlefield, the more lovely the Dendrobium blooms,” he closes the box, and hands it over to you. “Consider it, a gift,” he takes his blade in his hand and stretches it out for you to see clearly. “This here, is Muramasa… and the only way to fix him…is to refine him with Dendrobium ore,” He sheathes the katana onto his back and levels his gaze back towards you. “…but, it’s been centuries, since anyone has seen a Dendrobium ore. People say that the Dendrobium flowers crystallize when it’s been watered with enough blood…and yet I haven’t seen a single Dendrobium ore in my life,”

You stay silent, merely letting him finish his story.

“Well then, ma’am, I’ll be on my way. My thanks, for taking a look at Muramasa,” he tips his head forward, turns, footsteps towards the door, pulls it open and he pulls it close again as he leaves.

You stand still, the flower box in your hand. You wait a few minutes before you can completely feel yourself relax back into your normal state—you hadn’t even realized that you had been tense the whole time—and your eyes drop back to the small black box.

…Does he know? I’ll have to tell father about this…

And just as you always do with your other customers, you try to replay the interaction back in your head, to see if you missed anything or if you said anything wrong. The next customer didn’t come in until lunch time, so you were thankful that you had time to unpack your interaction with the strange man whose name you didn’t get.

The more you thought about it, the stranger it had been, or perhaps he was merely an eccentric? Still, it was completely unnecessary to tell a long-winded story about the Dendrobium…what was his purpose?

“You look out of sorts today,” A smug, familiar voice echoes through the shop. Wriothesley is suddenly there, you hadn’t even heard the door open nor the bell ring.

“Oh, Wriothesley,” you absentmindedly let out, snapping out of thought, eyes adjusting to the view in front of you rather than staring off into space. “Welcome back,” you give a small smile, which has the man a little suspicious.

He thought you were just tired, and maybe hungry, it is lunch time after all, but on closer inspection Wriothesley was conscious of the deeper frown lines you wore. Something as subtle as that, he would notice. Having a good eye for detail was one of his job descriptions.

“Ah, she finally remembers my name,” He takes a jab at you, grin appearing on his features. You can’t help the upward tug of your lips, and refrain from rolling your eyes. You don’t get to retort back because he follows up almost immediately: “Something happen?” He has his gauntlets tucked under his arm yet again, his frame seems taller today, or perhaps you were just feeling small after your weird interaction with your earlier customer.

“…Nothing for you to worry about,” You give a real smile this time, eyes darting over to his gauntlets. “Just…mulling over some fixes,”

It was convincing to the normal person, but to Wriothesley, it was a good attempt at diverting his attention from the real problem. Nevertheless, he didn’t push it, and set his gauntlets down on the counter for you. “Brought these back… I would’ve been back earlier but things happened at the Fortress…” he chuckled under his breath, rubbing the back of his neck as if he had done something disappointing.

The sight made you raise an eyebrow in amusement, mouth turning up the slightest bit more. He seemed to have a talent for making people feel at ease. “That’s nothing to apologize for, it’s your job,” your hands rest on his gauntlets, remembering the exact fix that it needed. “I say I’ll be done with this in 3 hours. You can come back for it right around then,”

He made a sound of understanding watching you start to take tools out to finish up the work. Wriothesley seemed to pause for a moment, his weight shifting from his left to his right. “You’re not getting lunch?”

You shake your head no, “I tend not to get hungry when I’m busy…or I guess I get too occupied with things and forget to eat,”

He again indicated that he heard you with a slight hum, but adds “…Well I’m reminding you now. Café Lutece is just down the road from here,” he points his thumb behind him. You look up to blink at him, your mind blank for a moment.

Was he asking you to eat with him or was he telling you to eat by yourself? You weren’t quite sure and you were stuck about what to say, until he made it clearer to you.

“Come on, I haven’t eaten either.” He jerked his head towards the shop door, indicating that he was about to go, and it sounded like he wasn’t going to offer again.

“Mm…” You think aloud, loosening your hold on the screwdriver in your hand. “I…guess I could go,” you decide, and its as if he relaxes the slightest bit more, waiting for you to walk around the counter, then walking ahead to hold the shop door open for you.

As you lock the shop up for lunch, you turn to him when done, somehow completely forgetting about your strange customer earlier, pointing a finger up to make a point “Lunch break is one hour max, otherwise, I’m charging you a late fee!”

Wriothesley chuckles, “and I thought I was a hard worker,” as the two of you walk together towards the restaurant down the road.

[eddiegettingshot]

okay and as beautiful as the puzzle pieces/opposites attract/parallels thing is what i actually appreciate about buck and eddie the most is how they love each other as much as they do because they are fundamentally more alike than they are different, and their differences are really just the outward manifestation of their similarities. their wounds are similar: the abandonment issues, the fear that they might not be enough to make someone stay or to even deserve it, the feeling of never getting it right, of always disappointing, always having to bear it alone, denying themselves the right to want what they want as much as they want it and to be complete and whole. but everything else too. the fierce way they love, how they never stop fighting for their families, the selflessness, the self-sacrifice, the stubbornness, their inherent compassion. both caregivers. both with their stupid senses of humor and their enjoyment of shenanigans and bickering. horrible liars. they're both so quick to forgive. so brave. sometimes reckless. such losers. they know each other so well because they see themselves in each other a little bit. i think. because they are soulmates. anyway

[absolutebl]

Top 10 Great BLs That Are REALLY hard to find (but worth tracking down)

You may want to go hunting anyway!

Seven Days

Seven Days: Monday-Thursday

Seven Days: Friday-Sunday

Japan 2015

Never doubt my ability to recommend this show. One of the best live action yaois ever made, with perfectly structured angst, fantastic characters and acting, and no problematic tropes (rare in Japanese BL). The leads have excellent chemistry although it’s low heat there’s still some really cute mutual kisses.

Cherry Magic AKA 30-sai made Dotei Da to Mahotsukai ni Nareru rashii

Japan 2020

The sweetest fluffiest magical realism BL, packaged as a pinning office romance, very low heat (practically chaste) but the cutest. It’s truly great.

Cherry Magic Thailand

Thai 2024

A soft charming warm hug of a show about crushes and mind reading and self worth, with no-fuss execution from a consummate team and an OG lead pair proving why they remain eternal and deserve to grow up. Look, here’s the thing, Cherry Magic is a great Thai BL in its own right not comparing it to any other iteration. But even when I do compare (and I've seen all the Cherries and read the manga) it still stands. I personally like it slightly better than the Japanese live action, but I think that’s because I just really like Thai BL and I LOVE TayNew. Also all the kissing was both present and better than any other iteration. As it should be from Thailand.

I Feel You Linger in the Air

Thai 2023

IFYLITA is an exquisite BL, from filming techniques to narrative framework (much like Until We Meet Again). Steeped in history and family drama it edges into lakorn (but no as much as To Sir With Love and with way less scenery chewing). This is an elegant and classy BL... from Thailand which normally doesn't even try for classy. The main couple (both as a pair and individuals) were excellent, particularly Bright (Yai) whose eye-work acting style is a personal favorite of mine. Pity about the ending. Oh it wasn’t that sad but it wasn’t good either. This show could easily have earned a 10/10 from me except that it fumbled the… erm… balls in the final quarter. Argh. Whatever.

All about the ecstasy and the agony here.

Restart After Come Back Home AKA Risutato wa tadaima no ato de

Japan 2020

Atmospheric study in rural Japan meets complex family dynamics built on a romance framework of city boy meets country boy, grumpy/sunshine. It’s beautiful and icy sweet. Slow moving in places but ultimately worth the patience, low heat, low angst, and stunning.

Given

Japan 2021

Boy joins band, falls in love with other boy. The singing is terrible, fast forward through that but with the possible exception of the hair styles, this BL could have been made in 2015 and no one would be surprised. As such, it wasn’t ground breaking, but it didn’t disappoint either.

Make a Wish

Thai 2023

A doctor who can see the dead strikes a bargain with a wish-granting irreverent tree angel - naturally they fall in love (from Sammon: Manner of Death & Triage). Stars Fluke Natouch opposite not-Ohm, but who tf cares because Fluke has chemistry with everybody. Once again the Thai afterlife is incredibly bureaucratic but I enjoyed the premise and the unfolding of the story (it’s not predictable but still satisfying and with nice little twist). I like that the doctor is just gay AF - fag hag bestie and all the swagger. The cast is excellent even if the comedic stylings are a bit overblown and tonally off. It had sad parts and did make me cry but is ultimately happy with a great sex scene, good smiley kisses, and all the agency. Definitely recommended.

2 Moons The Ambassador AKA 2 Moons 3

Thai 2022

A Thai pulp that felt like it came out 5 yrs prior, with many of the flaws inherent to that time and studio system, including manufactured angst and convoluted plot, but an ultimately sweet main couple that (as a pairing) feels a bit more modern and satisfying to watch than they started out. This will probably go down in history as one of the few BLs where I genuinely didn’t care about any of the side couples. All that said, I find this show oddly appealing and rewatchable and I have no excuses for that except, I enjoyed it probably more than it deserved. Nostalgia & d**k, it's what's for dinner.

I Want to See Only You AKA Kimi no Koto Dake Mite Itai

Japan 2022

This is a beautiful well acted piece of cinema, about two boys who are opposite personalities and grew up together. Gifted and serious Sakura pines after outgoing eccentric manic pixie dream boy, Yuma. It is very pretty and this is the kind of atmospheric elegantly performed BL that only really comes from Japan (complete with dead fish kisses - what you though Korea invented them? oh no). If you want something stylish, this is it.

Triage

Thai 2022

BL does Groundhog Day featuring a doctor stuck in a time loop who must save a poor little rich boy from death by seducing the stuffing out of him, then PLOT TWIST, poor little rich boy must do the same for the doctor! Unfortunately... stuffing keeps leaking. I thought the plot was engaging if a little redundant and occasionally exhausting. The pairs were all well done, low heat but with decent chemistry and the support characters were likable (or unlikable, as required). If anything, the romance arc detracted and distracted from the main plot, but that doesn't stop this from being a genuinely good show.

HONORABLE MENTION

Great Men Academy

Thai 2019

Bodyswap involving unicorns turning a teenage girl into a boy makes this questionable as a BL (because, ya know, gender). But the fact remains that James is killer in the lead, and I (who do not like bodyswap) loved this damn show. Look, there is actual plot, hotties at boarding school, "bully the one you love" trope, some weird VR shit, very bad CGI, and yes, the boys end up together... whether they boys or not, so to speak.

Some of these shows may appear on a smaller streaming service, like WeTV, or they may be on a legal platform in your territory. I hope it goes without saying you should check there first.

(source)

This list updated Spring 2024, not responsible for cool stuff that went missing (or was added to a platform) after that date.

It's it last in a series the rest of which are:

[peace-hunter]

I wonder if Jazz could be a catalyst for Orion realizing he isn’t that special. Because B-127 definitely is going to view Orion as extremely special and important, and Elita may view him as especially annoying. But to Jazz, Orion is just a cool coworker and a fun guy to be around, who does reckless stuff but also likes to help. So long as he doesn’t get Prime-dazzled, he could be a great part of Optimus grounding himself in realizing he is also just some guy.

ooohh i love that idea! personally i think elita would still be critical for orion's character development in this au, but adding jazz to the mix could be really fun!

the thing about orion's arc in this au is that he has to let go of the idea that him being a prime since birth makes him inherently worthy of leading. both because that's a pretty conceited way of thinking and because it places an unreasonable amount of pressure on him.

the high guard are absolutely no help on this because to them orion being a Prime is the foundation upon which they've set all their hopes for the future. he's their last hope and they've built up an idea of what he would grow up to be like throughout all the years they've been apart. and when they finally reunite and he inevitably fails to meet up their expectations, their disappointment is so great it causes a lot of them to lose all their faith on the Primes and Primus as a whole.

which. not a great thing to put on a twenty something years old kid who just got his entire world shaken to its very foundation!

bee is not nearly as bad as the high guard about this, but he's definitely a little bit too starstruck to really give orion the grounding presence he needs for this. like. bee would've followed orion pretty much to the end of the world simply because he was the first friend he'd had in so long. so add to that orion being revealed as a Prime and bee is simply too attached now to really tell orion off in any way.

not to mention orion feels a bit too responsible for bee to let him know just how shaken and terrified he is by what bee clearly sees as something amazing. personally i see bee as just a couple years younger than the rest of the squad but enough so that orion feels compelled to take care of him in some level. more like a younger brother than a son, but still firmly in the "I have to be strong for him" zone.

now for elita i think she would be perfect to make orion understand he's being incredibly idiotic by thinking being a Prime inherently makes him a good leader. she worked her aft off to be captain of just one (1) miner crew and she's better than him in everything so what makes him think just being born with a fancy title is sufficient to lead an entire army. he has to put in the work too. there's simply no way around it.

and in contrast jazz can make him see that it's okay. it's fine that he's not the perfect Prime already. that he's not an irremediable failure just because he failed once. orion saved his life back when he was nothing but a reckless miner with nothing but spite and a good heart to his name. even when he messed up and got in trouble, he never stopped trying to help. that's why he liked him. why would him being a Prime change that.

anyway! i like it, good idea nonnie <333

baby prime orion au