#incorrect quotes markiplier egos

[faecaribou]

Wilford and Host: *sitting on a bench looking miserable* Dark: What's wrong? Wilford: Sit with us and I'll tell you. Dark, sitting down: Well? Wilford: This bench is freshly painted. Dark: Host: Yeah they did it to me too.

[marksandrec]

Marks and Rec: Misc #2630

Roommate meeting. (Dialogue from What We Do in the Shadows.)

[foxtamer113]

Dark: I don’t think we can mansplain, manipulate, or malewife our way out of it this time.

Wilford, cracks his knuckles: Manslaughter it is.

[incorrect-quotes-egos]

Yancy: Do you think different paints have different tastes?

Wilford: They do.

Bim: …Why did you say that with such certainty?

[shabeeboothedrawingender]

I saw this in ADWM and it was funny for my AU, so I made this.

(App: Twinote)

[uncorrectegoquotes]

Wilford: 'You'll never find the body' is such a boring threat. A better threat would be; 'You'll never stop finding the body.'

Host, bored: Or just say, 'They'll be finding parts of you for at least four months...and you'll still be alive for three of them.'

Wilford: Now that's a threat!

Bim, covering Eric's ears: *horrified silence*

[septicwriters]

Dark: "Get on your knees."

Anti:....

Dark: "I said get down on the ground!"

Anti: "What? S̛o ̕we ca̴n ̛t̛alk to͏ e͜a͜ch̀ot͡he̷r̛ at ̛th͏e͞ ͡sa̵m̨e h̶ie͝g̀ht̕?"

[adalwolfgang]

(Inspired by @archiviststar)

(Viewer): I'm having problems with a guy.

Wilford: Like his dead body won't fit in your car problems or "you like him" problems?

(Viewer): The “I like him" problems.

Wilford, shrugs : Too bad, I could have actually helped you with the other types.

(Viewer): …

(Viewer), trying not to crack a smile: You would bury yourself?

Wilford: Yeah I mean- wait-

Wilford:

[not-mary-sue]

Actor Mark: As far back as I can remember, I always knew I deserved to be dead.

[uncool-hero]

Markiplier Ego Incorrect Quotes

Abe: Why is there blood everywhere???

Wilford: I may have aggressively poked someone with a knife

Abe: YOU STABBED SOMEONE?!

Wilford: No, no, aggressively poked them with a knife

[mbgcreates]

M: Is something burning?

Dark: Just my desire for you~

M: Dark, the toaster is literally on fire....

Pulled from this incorrect quotes website called Perchance, which sources from both Tumblr posts and tv shows (which tend to pop up in incorrect quotes Tumblr posts lol), and has options for romantic and platonic and sfw versus not! It is very fun to mess around with lol. I've put the visual id under the cut cuz it blocked part of the image

three panels. in panel one, just M is standing, confused. in panel 2, Dark is leaning across the kitchen island seductively with bright light behind him. in the last, it is revealed that the toaster is enveloped in a raging fire

[faecaribou]

Dark: What do you call disobeying the law? Wilford: A hobby. Dark: *crosses their arms* Wilford: That I do not engage in.

[marksandrec]

Marks and Rec: Misc #2610

(Dialogue from Baldur's Gate 3.) Bonus:

[foxtamer113]

Dark: This is a mistake.

Wilford, enthusiastically: A mistake we're going to laugh about one day!

Dark: But not today.

Wilford, still enthusiastic: Oh, no. Today's going to be a mess.

[incorrect-quotes-egos]

Damien: What the fuck? People actually tell their crushes they like them??

Mark: What the hell do you do?

Damien: I die? What kinda question…

[shabeeboothedrawingender]

Stupid stuff that I would put in a gacha video but I'm too lazy at the moment. Featuring a lot of Egos from my AU and TEoS Dave probably who knows. It's kinda like incorrect quotes.

Dark: Wilford, do you know where half of our staff are?

Wilford: Well, our androids are plotting world domination, the Jim's are sitting in the yard trying to find something interesting to report, Yancy and Illinois are usually in a corner shoving their tongues down each other's throats and I don't even remember anything about anyone else.

Dark: ...So we're short staffed?

Wilford: Precisely.

Dave: So you sleep? Without the risk of death?

Wilford: Pretty much. If we're not overloaded on caffeine or sugar.

Dark: Sips his coffee

Wilford: ...He's special.

Engineer: Could you pass me that wrench?

Murdock: Hands him a knife

Engineer: This is a knife…?

Murdock: Same thing.

Wilford: I'm so glad that my husband has finally made friends, like honestly he was such an isolated man before now I mean look at him-

Dark and Dave are just passed out on the floor

Dark: Murder is okay.

Engineer: Mr Whitacre, they only got your order wrong-

Dark: Hah. Hahahahaha. You dare to challenge me?

Actor: Of course I do! I'm practically your god!

Dark: And I'm a politician. What the fuck do you bring to the table, asshole?

Wilford: Hey Dark, did you know your sister is alive in space?

Dark: Haha, very funny-

Ms Whitacre: Hello!

Dark: AAAAAAA-

Dark: points to Ms Whitacre My belief for this woman being real is the same as my belief for Hatsune Miku. She's a fake ass bitch whose only purpose is to taunt me.

Mack and Actor high five

��� The friendship of two people being jealous of others ✨

Dark: You know, I really appreciate you paying for this dinner.

Wilford: Don't mention it!

Dark: Though it seems you couldn't afford anything other than ice cream.

Dave: Hey Wilford! That was your name right?

Wilford: Yes.

Dave: I taught the office crow a sentence!

Crow Dark flies in

Wilford: ...Go on Darky?

Crow Dark: I have ptsd.

Wilford: Wow-

Crow Dark: I depend on caffeine.

Dave: Now before you ask-

(Time Travel back to before wkm)

Celine: Damien?

Walks into his room

Celine: Da- Huh?

Dave is sat trying not to sleep and Damien is zonked out on sleeping pills

Celine: Who the heck? (she doesn't say hell, not very ladylike at this point in her life)

Celine: I'm here to pick up my brother's medication?

Doctor: The antidepressants, three different types of sleeping pills and painkillers?

Celine: ...

Doctor: Ma'am?

Wilford: Your dad is a crow now, how do you feel Chi-Chi?

Chi-Chi: Meow.

5 minutes later

Chi-Chi: HISSSSS!

Crow Dark: CAW?!

(Chi-chi is Dark's cat)

@side-blog-for-reblogs

@silly4goose20

I dunno I thought you'd enjoy them