#incorrect band scenario -Hospital AU edition (where Styx and Squeeze have been thrown through many a wild work experience)

[northwestofinsanity]

Band Incorrect Quote/Scenario -“I Love My Job…” (Hospital AU)

Well, with an incorrect-quote-worthy event at work, here’s another cursed extended band incorrect scenario in the cursed veterinary hospital AU with Styx and Squeeze… This time, rather than the mixed bunch in “Frencho Fryo Time”, or Squeeze by themselves as with the Daylight Savings time, this one features Styx by themselves, and the situation brings out their dramatic dynamic!

-It’s 10:00 AM, and a drug label has come back from reception to the pharmacy lab for the assistant team to refill a patient’s script of liquid furosemide*-

[*This is a diuretic medication, often used to prevent or remove fluid buildup around the heart and lungs (effusion), most commonly for patients in later stage heart disease]

Tommy Shaw: *Sees the label* “Is this a compound? There’s no recipe label printed.”

JY: “No, if you go in the cabinet above Dr. R’s desk, that one is pre-made in a solution, because it’s really unstable if we compound it in-house. All you have to do is just get a syringe and pull out however many cc’s the label says it’s for.”

Tommy Shaw: *Goes and looks in the cabinet* “JY, I can’t find it!”

JY: *Comes in, and finds the two boxes of it, unopened, but on the top shelf, and turned around so the labels face the back of the cabinet, unfortunately positioned in a way that set Tommy up for failure finding it* “There it is.” *Pulls one box down, and flips the other around.*

Tommy Shaw: “Really? Up there, turned around?”

JY: “I don’t know who put it away like that. It’s not supposed to be put away like that. Anyway, do you still want to fill it, or do you want me to fill it?”

Tommy Shaw: “I’ve never filled that one, but it seems easy enough, so I probably should.”

JY: “Okay. It’s not really any different than if you were doing the Cisapride solution.”

Tommy Shaw: *Perks up* “Oh, okay! Yeah, I can do that!”

JY: *Has an odd feeling that something is going to go wrong, despite the fact that Tommy has filled quite a few scripts before and that he usually has faith in Tommy to do things right, so he stays in the pharmacy hall in hopes he can be there to prevent whatever is about to go wrong*

-Less than two minutes later- Tommy Shaw: *Has gotten the compounding bottle and syringe adapter tops at the ready, and is in the process of pulling the correct amount out of the stock bottle. As he is, he’s to get the syringe plunger to pull back due to the viscous nature of the furosemide solution.  On autopilot, he disconnects the syringe and pulls some air into it, then puts it into the adapter top to create some extra air in the bottle to keep the plastic walls from getting sucked inward as the solution is pulled out, but forgets in his auto-pilot mode that he has a rather large, 25cc syringe, rather than a tiny 3 or 1cc syringe, thus, having the plunger pulled nearly halfway back with air is a lot more than usual.  He starts to push the air into the bottle*

JY: *Does a double take, realizing after 5 cc’s what Tommy is unknowingly doing, and can see the sides of the bottle starting to bow outward* “Oh, don’t do that-!”

-Instantly, before anyone can even respond to JY’s warning, the air pressure in the bottle pushes the syringe adapter top out of the bottle neck and causes the solution to spray out of the bottle, across Tommy’s chest and arms, in his face, and all over the countertop and everything on it.  It’s on the wall between the counter and the overhead cabinets, on the cabinet doors, and all over the lab sample tubes in the basket on the counter, as well as in the open box of microscope slides, and soaked into the towel that various bottles of cleaner and lab solvents sit on to protect the counter top from any leaks-

Dennis, John, and Chuck: *All gasp super loud*

Tommy Shaw: *Freezes with a look on his face of being a hundred percent done with everything as he sets the bottle down, which now only has about a quarter of the medication volume left in it, and wipes the droplets that are dangerously close to his eyes*

Dennis DeYoung: *Looks like he’s about to say something, or rather, shout something at Tommy*

JY: *Puts his hands up and very sternly shakes his head at Dennis, then turns and gives John and Chuck a similar warning look* “Don’t say anything...”

Tommy Shaw: *Inhales deeply with a wheeze and lets out a groaning sigh*

John Panozzo: *Walks out of the pharmacy hallway, because he’s trying hard not to laugh and knows he’s going to lose the battle*

Tommy Shaw: “I… don’t even know what I expected would happen when I did that… I don’t know why I did that… or what I was even thinking.” *Sighs again, setting the syringe and bottle down on the counter, and puts his hands down at his sides in defeat*

JY: *Grabbing some hand towels and rags out of the closet in the hallway* “Okay… it’s alright… we’ve got the other bottle.  We’ll just clean all this up, use what we’ve got left in this one before opening the other, and we’ll let Alan Gratzer know that one of the bottles spilled and we’re on our last one.  He doesn’t even have to know how it happened.”

Dennis DeYoung: *Eyes wide* “What do you mean he doesn’t-!?”

JY: *Trying so hard not to sigh in a way that sounds annoyed as he is* “Tommy, if you don’t have a spare shirt in your car, there’s that whole bin of spares in the bathroom.  Please go wash that off and get changed, and we can make sure that goes in the next load of laundry.”

Tommy Shaw: *Looks alarmed* “Is this one of those drugs that are bad if you touch it?”

JY: “No, it doesn’t have effects on skin contact -and even if it did, it would only be an issue if you have blood pressure trouble.  But you don’t need to be walking around covered in it.”  *Waits until Tommy goes off before turning to Dennis* “I just said, it is NOT that big a deal, and Alan has WAY too much to do with tracking inventory -as long as nobody is stealing or consuming the drugs, he DOES NOT CARE how it happened.  He just needs to know that we made a mistake, some was lost, and we need to order more.  End of story!”

Chuck Panozzo: *Looks between both of them* “BYE.”  *Walks off, and with the power of suggestion, goes back to the laundry room to see where the cycle is at and if he can make sure Tommy’s scrub top gets in the next load*

Dennis DeYoung: “Fine, then.”  *Walks away toward treatment*

JY: *Groans to self as he sprays and wipes off the main part of the counter, then goes to get the other bottle of that particular medication solution so that he can fill the script and have that part over with before dealing with the more details areas that got splashed, deciding in his head that he’ll leave most of it for Tommy to clean when he gets back, but will deal with the tedious process of washing all the microscope slides and drying them so they don’t have water stains or streaks* “Ohh, I love my job, I love my job, I love my job… I do love my job. And my coworkers…”

[northwestofinsanity]

Band Incorrect Quote/Scenario -“It’s Too Early For This!” (Happy Daylight Savings Spring Forward Monday)

Provided a bit later in the day than hoped, because Tumblr formatting put up a fight on me… A *long* scenario in an incorrect setting universe far more incorrect than most of my incorrect scenarios -solely for the guilty pleasure and humor of inserting bands into really wild situations that happened at my veterinary hospital job in current-day, in the chance occasions I could see their personalities fitting in.  Featuring the mid/late 80s Squeeze lineup, since the clock fiasco here sort of parallels well to the “Hourglass” music video.  (And maybe that’s the only realistic parallel here -but then, it is an incorrect scenario, and y’all can’t say I didn’t warn you!)

-It’s the Monday morning after the Spring forward to Daylight Saving’s Time, and the 7:00 AM openers (Keith and Gilson) are arriving at what was just formerly 6:00 AM to begin the day-

Keith Wilkinson: *Half asleep on his feet since he’s extra effected by the time shift.  Goes into the pharmacy hall, takes the clock off the wall, moves it forward an hour, and hangs it back up, having to attempt this a few times because the nail in the wall is loose and keeps moving into the wall so there’s not enough sticking out for the clock to hang on.  He finally gets it to stay up, and after waiting a few seconds to see that it isn’t falling and appears stable, shuffles off to help Gilson with other opening tasks*

-An hour later: The 7:30 arrival crew are all in, and mandatory opening tasks are finished.  To attempt to wake up a bit, everyone is going around doing other chores and keeping busy until appointments begin.-

Glenn Tilbrook: *Working on the weekly chore list and cleaning walls and countertops in exam rooms that were deep cleaned earlier in the previous week, then breaks off to load the first appointment that arrives early*

Keith Wilkinson: *Upstairs in the supply closet, getting paper towels and a few other things they need to restock*

Gilson Lavis: *Folding laundry in treatment -Chris got a lot done over the weekend on kennel duty, and the trash bag nested in the bin is stuffed to the gills so that it stands up level with his chest*

Chris Difford: *Setting up and assigning other exam rooms to the other appointments that are coming up next by writing information on the whiteboards on the door and pre-loading supplies that will be needed specific to those appointments*

Jools Holland: *Setting up the lab and pharmacy counter, and reading the appointment information off the computer screen aloud to Chris so he doesn’t have to keep going back to it in between each room being set up*

Glenn Tilbrook: *Comes out of the room he loaded, having gotten all the history he needs to report to the office with*

-As Glenn goes into the office, a baby gate propped up along the side of one of the doctors’ desks randomly slides down and hits the tile floor with a loud clatter-

Glenn Tilbrook: *Winces, because the room he loaded is directly across from the office door, and the walls are very thin, so literally everything in the hall is audible inside the rooms*

Chris Difford: *Gets jumpscared, as he’s spazzy and disoriented from being overtired, then snickers quietly before continuing to prep rooms. He is especially sleep deprived out of all of them, because he worked kennel duty in addition to the time change*

Jools Holland: “Goodness gracious!”

Glenn Tilbrook: *Picks the gate up* “Well, that’s something to wake everyone up with!” *Gives the history to the doctor, then starts to duck back into the other room he’s working on cleaning*

-Not even two seconds later, before Glenn can even make it back to his cleaning supplies, a huge, multiple-crash clatter resounds from the hall, ten times louder than the baby gate falling, as the clock finally jumps off the wall, takes the wall-mounted phone out with it, and both attack the computer on the pharmacy counter below-

Gilson Lavis: *Still around the corner in treatment folding laundry* “WHAT in the bloody HELL was THAT?” *Sets down the sheet he was working on and goes around to investigate*

Chris Difford: *Gives off a single cackle nearly a full octave above his typical voice tone and goes into hard, silent, wheezing, hysterical laughter*

Jools Holland: *Briefly flinches and recoils back away from the clock that fell just inches in front of his face, then turns toward Gilson with a deadpan expression*

Glenn Tilbrook: *Turns straight back around toward the hall, just one second too late to see the action, but just in time for the immediate aftermath*

-The pharmacy wall clock is on the floor right in front of the counter.  The phone, which usually hangs on the wall under the clock is also down -the body with the cradle, dial-pad, and intercom are on the counter, on top of the computer keyboard, and the phone receiver is on the floor, dangling by the curly phone cord stretched down the front of the cabinets.  The computer screen is spazzing out with a hundred error dialogue boxes, due to the phone cradle actively holding down keys, which already got smashed when the clock went down-

Glenn and Gilson (in unison from opposite ends of the hall): “LORD have MERCY!” *Both chuckle*

Chris Difford: *Leaning over the counter over the sink, still shaking, gasping, and wheeze-laughing, with tears in his eyes.  He’s visibly too weak to do anything but brace himself by his hands on the edge of the counter and lean against it to stay upright, and try not to look at any of his mates, because if he does, it’s going to set him off harder… He knows deep down this shouldn’t be this funny, but in his overtired state, it is the best thing in the world, and he is GONE!*

Jools Holland: *Picks the phone hook up off the keyboard, looking unimpressed; grabs the mouse and starts dismissing the errors* “What is this day?”

Glenn Tilbrook: “It’s hardly begun yet!” *Picks up the clock and starts fighting with the nail to try and get it hung back up again, having it shrink back into the wall on him multiple times. This causes the clock to fall again, only he catches it this time, with a priceless, wide-eyed, open-mouthed expression of surprise as he reaches to snatch it out of the air*

Jools Holland: *Finally cracks and starts laughing at this, which sets Chris off again and takes him further* “Well, shit!”

Glenn Tilbrook: “First the baby gate, then the clock and the phone jumping off the wall -our first patient is probably wondering what on Earth is happening here!”

Jools Holland: “That’s it, it’s official!  *Goes into his dramatic announcer voice* Our clock says that it is WAY TOO EARLY for this!” *Flinches as the computer throws up another error box, because it is big-mad after having its keys pressed so aggressively.* “And apparently, now this does, too!” *Shuts the whole thing down so it can be restarted.*

Chris Difford: *Points to Jools in agreement, then shakes his head, still in hysterical laughter, and runs out around the corner into treatment, leaving the room to go pull himself together where nothing else can get to him*

Keith Wilkinson: *Comes around the corner scooting a huge Sam’s Club package of paper towels along the tile in front of him with his feet, while having a six-pack sleeve of Kleenex boxes tucked under one arm, a roll of trash bags under the other, and with fingertips wrapped around the handle of a half-gallon refill bottle of hand soap, only leaving one barely-freed hand for him to have held the rail while getting down the very steep stairs in the back* *Freezes in place and does a double-take at Chris running out in hysterics and Jools and Glenn trying to get the clock and phone back up, then unceremoniously sets down the soap bottle and tissue boxes, since they’re nearly falling out of his grip, anyway.*  “What on Earth’s happened?  I leave for five minutes and I’ve come back to this!”

Glenn Tilbrook: *Goes off in one of his guttural, mirthful cackles* “Too much!  That’s what’s happened -too much!”

Jools Holland: “Too much at this hour, that’s for sure.  Even without being an hour ahead!”

-Twenty minutes later-

Glenn Tilbrook: *Notices that the clock is twenty minutes behind, approximately where it was when it fell down* “What?” *Takes it back down and tries to check that the batteries didn’t come loose, then realizes he can hear it ticking, though the hands aren’t moving, and in trying to turn the knob on the back to adjust the hands, realizes that they came detached from the internal mechanism with the glorious impact* “Oh, shit -great!” *Tries to fix the clock one more time, just in case, before leaving it on the manager’s desk*

Chris Difford: *Places a note on the clock stating ‘It jumped off the wall and broke’ and finds the office instant camera to commemorate the most chaotic Spring Forward*

[northwestofinsanity]

Band Incorrect Quote/Scenario -“Frencho-Fryo Time” 1

This is set in the same cursed, crackfic vet hospital AU setting as the Daylight Savings Time special that was “It’s Too Early For This”. Placing under a “keep reading” for that reason in addition to length, but I’ve decided I’ve got no shame when there’s equally wild and cursed memes in different forms floating around here. This time, featuring members of both Styx and Squeeze, as the main bands I’ve done this AU with (though a few one-off members of other bands have been in it in all my documents).

*“Frencho-Fryo Time”, or alternatively, “Going Frencho-Fryo” is slang for the point of overtiredness where everyone starts getting silly and giggly over everything. (Synonymous with being “loopy”, “punchy”, “crackhead hours”, or “going cuckoo for cocoa puffs”, etc). Shenanigans ensue!

-It’s about 4:30 in the afternoon, and there is a gap in the schedule due to a traffic accident on one of the main roads, leading several appointments to be late or cancelled. This has created a lag in-between mid-afternoon appointments, so everyone is getting chores done in the downtime, and the stark difference and loss of momentum after a very hectic morning has everyone feeling a bit silly-

Glenn Tilbrook: *In the surgery prep corner, cutting paper drape material off a boxed roll, lined up to guide tapes on the counter marking the proper size, and then accordion-folding the drapes so that they're ready to wrap inside packs with the surgical tools*

Tommy Shaw: *At one of the treatment tables/“tub-sinks” with the big clean laundry bin, working on folding a bunch of it*

Jools Holland: *Comes strutting through the swinging door from reception into the back treatment room and leans against the counter with a smirk, side-eyeing Tommy and Glenn mischievously, as if just trying to see how long he can get away with being there staring them down before someone says something*

Glenn Tilbrook: *Looks up from very meticulously folding a drape to make it perfectly lined up, as he would be alright with doing nothing less, and looks over to Jools* “Finish the drug inventory in the front closet, or did you just get bored with it? Because if you’ve found yourself bored with it and in need of something else to do, I believe Tommy could probably use some help with folding the laundry!”

Tommy Shaw: *Blushes and hides a silent giggle behind a king-sized bedsheet he is hardcore struggling to fold neatly, due to only being able to hold it up but so high off the ground, and doing it alone rather than with anyone to hold the other end while he lines it up. He groans when while trying to drape it over the tub sink to help line it up, he accidentally knocks a muzzle down into the tub through the gap in the removable grate top*

Jools Holland: “Oh, there’s lots of excitement to be had in the supply closet! My favorite is when someone hasn’t screwed the lid back on a bottle properly, and you go to pick it up to check the expiration date and spill the pills everywhere! It’s a fantastic frenzy, I must say. Though it’s not a very good time to pick it all up.”

Glenn Tilbrook: *Looks like he’s trying not to giggle, then gets a rare, devilish grin on his face* “Are you telling me you were the one to spill the pills all over the floor in there and cause the big shout we heard yesterday, Julian?”

Tommy Shaw: *Does a double-take* “Jools, I didn’t think you liked being called by your full name, or if anyone was allowed to!”

Jools Holland: "I'll tell you that you wouldn't be entirely wrong. It depends on the situation. I do find most of the time, I actually prefer it from my mates who knew me before my nickname was a thing”

Glenn Tilbrook: [Pulls the last bit of drape paper off the roll in the box, gets this silly grin and light in his eyes, pulls the cardboard tube out, holds it up, and shouts into it with a projection like he's announcing things] "JULIAN..."

Jools Holland: "Ai-yi-yi..." *Shakes his head and walks back through the door to up front giggling*

Larry Gowan: [Walks in past Jools with an Australian Cattle Dog mix on a leash, and carrying a bag of supplies, as the dog has just arrived for boarding, and grins, gesturing grandly toward the dog as he stops beside the treatment counter and sets the bag down]. "This is Ted!"

Glenn Tilbrook: [Walking across the room with the tube, and tips up like a megaphone again, booming into it as deeply as he can make his voice go] "TED!"

Tommy Shaw: *Folding laundry on a tub sink, and catches a fit of the giggles over this, between Glenn with the tube, and the fact that he thinks Ted is a funny name for a dog*

Glenn Tilbrook: *Also starts laughing, and puts the tube into the recycle bin beside the break room door*

Tommy Shaw: “No, don’t throw that away yet -let me see that!” *Finishes folding a sheet, puts it down, and goes over and grabs the tube out of the recycle bin, then tries to bonk it hard against the break room door frame with an anticlimactic thud* “OHHH, that was SO disappointing -it should have bonked LOUDER than that!” *Raises the tube up to shout in it* “Booooo!” *Shoves it back down in the trash*

Glenn Tilbrook: *Nearly trips on his way back to the surgery counter when Tommy does this and goes into one of his wild, gut-cackles*

Larry Gowan: *Standing there, laughing while waiting for a technician to come free and do the check-in exam on ‘Ted’ the dog* “The tube is too narrow, and the walls are too thick! We need to call the manufacturer and tell them to change the design of it! We deserve some fun after cutting and folding all the drapes that come out of that if you ask me!”

Glenn Tilbrook: “Why, you tell them that, alright! Somebody needs to!” *Pulls the new box of drape material that was staged in the cabinet of surgery supplies, decides that he’s had enough of making drapes for now, and goes over to help Tommy fold the laundry*