#in the pilot Charlie mentions that the one thing she picked up from her dad is

[hooffuloftootsierolls]

Parental advice

[justanotherhh]

alastor and touch

just a post documenting alastor and touches throughout the show

I didn't include the pilot, but i do want to mention it, because one thing that's quite striking is how they changed that element from pilot!alastor to show!alastor somewhat. might make a separate post for the pilot at some point to compare

I also did a mix of when alastor noticeably doesn't touch someone directly and in what contexts he gets touched, as well as a couple of other related boundaries and moments of interest

ep1 overture: alastor doesn't touch anyone in this episode. also noting that this is the episode where we get him unequivocally turning down angel's advances, and avoiding being filmed several times, with the iconic "this face was made for radio" line, so not only is he not touching, he's also making some general boundaries clear

ep2 radio killed the video star: 1. niffty crawls up alastor and he picks her up and puts her down. she crawls up him again. he clearly doesn't mind 2. sir pentious rips off a corner of his coat. alastor blows him up -- he later burns the piece of coat that sir pentious had kept: "not many people have been able to take even this much off me." 3. the entirety of the vox vs al showdown is of course notably done over radio/tv, so they're never in the same room. just interesting in terms of how it goes down with them generally in s1, they're constantly kept at a distance via screens and airwaves

ep3 scrambled eggs: 1. taps an egg boi with his staff, while threatening it. generally uses his stick to interact with the egg bois -- pointing, tapping, etc 2. another brief "makes screen fuzzy on a security camera"

ep4 masquerade: notably the episode (with lots of sexual content and specifically valentino) where he doesn't appear, except for briefly in a flashback

ep5 dad beat dad: 1. shakes lucifer's cane, rather than his hand -- he also wipes his hand on his suit afterwards, as if disgusted 2. TOUCHES CHARLIE'S SHOULDER!! notably in front of lucifer in order to piss him off. then goes ONE STEP FURTHER and partially puts his arm around her when saying how proud they all are of her 3. grabs lucifer and spins him out of the way during his part of the song 4. picks niffty out of the toilet 5. during the song: dances with charlie, pats her on the head/tucks her in, and puts his hands on her shoulders 6. during the song: pushes lucifer aside again, including doing a little hip shove 7. lucifer grabs him by his lapels and gets right in his face 8. hugs mimzy 9. grabs charlie and steers her by the shoulders 10. grabs/strokes husk's ear 11. grabs husk via his leash 12. rips the bad guys apart with his tentacles. also picks them up with his hands and eats them 13. mimzy pokes him several times in the chest. he removes her finger in annoyance, and boops her on the nose condescendingly

ep6 welcome to heaven: the other episode that notably includes a sex club (and also heaven and a lot of talk about redemption) that does not involve alastor

ep7 hello rosie: 1. grabs charlie's shoulders, and then her face, forcing her to smile 2. grabs her shoulders again when talking about the angels 3. touches her hair, and then sidehugs her while selling her on the deal 4. DEAL HANDSHAKE 5. more shoulder grabbing, cheek pinching, and patting on head when he's talking about her being charming and capable 6. links arms with her while taking her to rosie 7. rosie joyfully grabs him and spins him around 8. grabs charlie when introducing her to rosie 9. gives charlie his mic in order to help her inspire the cannibals (later replaced with a cane given by rosie) 10. dances with rosie, including a little dip

ep8 the show must go on: 1. more attempted screen voyeurism by vox 2. charlie uses alastor's cane again to speech 3. niffty crawls over him again and places a crown of roaches on his head (possibly his most openly joyous moment) 4. fights adam using his shadow tentacles and creatures, before getting seriously wounded by him (and then has his famous mental breakdown at the idea that his reputation could have been blemished by having been read as altruistic of all things, *spits*) 5. the torn picture of alastor and vox shows them a little apart from one another 6. appears in the middle of the hotel gang and is hugged by charlie, patted on the back by vaggie, and also adorably hugged around the legs by niffty

GENERAL OBSERVATIONS: 1. other characters do initiate more touches, with husk being the other character who's more standoffish, but that's also his general slowly beginning to open up emotionally and he shifts especially with regards to angel after ep4 (although he does do casual pats and the like before that + the massage) 2. generally everyone touches casually in some way or other throughout the show, including in background moments, except for alastor, who always touches very deliberately, whether it's for violence, manipulation, condescension, or affection -- he doesn't seem to engage in casual touch, but does accept it from certain individuals (mainly niffty). for example in dad beat dad in which he initiates the most touches, he's pissing off lucifer and manipulating charlie. he hasn't touched her before this on the show proper, and he's doing it because he has an audience and is trying to convince both lucifer and her of something (that he's a better mentor/support system than lucifer) 3. similarly when he's being very familiar with charlie in hello rosie, he's selling her on making a deal with him, and then on making himself indispensable to her, while also grooming her*** [EDIT: been informed that this could be misread: "grooming" here meant in the general sense of mentoring her in a way that would benefit him, as he says "she's full of potential that i could guide," NOT in a sexual context] -- in true alastor fashion it's hard to say what's sincere and what's self-serving, but it certainly all serves a purpose 4. that being said, i think charlie has become a character he doesn't mind touching, just like he doesn't mind it with niffty, rosie, or mimzy. funnily enough the only time charlie initiates a touch with him is in the finale, when she's relieved he's alive 5. i think the kinds of touches from each of these characters is different. with charlie it's that aforementioned part-manipulation, part-mentor type vibe, where he's very much insinuating himself into her good graces and trust, with niffty it's because She Is A Creature Who Crawls, with mimzy there's a Past (and she clearly crosses a boundary because she thinks she can with him, and he puts his foot down on that), and with rosie there's a respect. before i did this noting down i also thought he touched rosie way more than he actually does, but he only does it once in order to dance (which, if anything else even applies, i think is his main source of actually enjoying touching others, i personally don't think he actually enjoys hugs, it's just a Thing some people expect of you), and simply acquiesces to her grabbing him in the first scene. again, i think he accepts this because he likes her 6. This Deer Does Not Touch Men If He Can Help It

CONCLUSION: if alastor respects you, he will let you touch him to an extent. he's not touchy himself, and mainly does it as a show of power, manipulation, and condescension (lucifer, mimzy, husk, charlie), but he likes dancing. he stays faaar away from sexual contexts in general

I also want to do a separate post on alastor and respect/closeness/familiarity, because i think it's worthwhile analysing how he expresses these things with characters on his terms (for example, giving charlie the mic says far more about his positive feelings towards her than any of the times he touches her), and it's mostly very clear when he's comfortable in a situation and when he's not

[sebastianstangirl01]

Hi I was wondering if you could write a Pete Maverick Mitchell x daughter reader? I was thinking from the first top gun movie but it is your choice. Just something simple like he is at top gun and he gets a call from the hospital saying the the baby sitter had to bring the reader in because she got very sick. So Mav is scared because he just lost Goose and he doesn’t want to loose his baby too. Then when he finally gets to the hospital the reader is scared and all of Mavericks fears turns into the need to comfort his child. Once the reader feels better she is able to go home to finally sleep in her own bed but not without cuddles from her loving dad.

I was thinking maybe the daughter/readers age is around 3-4

Thank you and 100% your choice

Fatherhood Fears

Title: Fatherhood Fears

Pairing: Pete “Maverick” Mitchell x Daughter Reader

Summary: When Mavericks 3 year old get sick and rushed to the hospital by Carole while he is working as an instructor at Top Gun, Maverick is beside himself with worry and immediately rushes to the hospital. He realizes that he needs to put his fears behind him so he can be there for his little girl.

Warnings: sick kid, mentions of throwing up, dehydration, the flu, worried Mav

It had been a pretty normal day so far for Maverick, he and Goose along with Iceman and Slider are permanently stationed at TopGun as instructors who only go on high profile missions. If you would’ve asked Maverick 3 years ago after his time as a TopGun student if he thought he would be here today, working as an instructor he would’ve called you crazy.

He’s Pete “Maverick” Mitchell for gods sake, the man that can’t be tied down. That was until his little girl came along. The little spitfire Y/N Mitchell was a surprise to Maverick, after things with Charlie didn’t workout and she went back to DC the pilot went back to his old ways by sleeping with any woman with a pulse. Which then resulted in the little bundle 9 months later of Y/N.

From the moment Maverick held you in his arms he knew he whole world was going to change, but in that moment nothing else mattered to him than you did. He welcomed the change, he settled down and got his permanent assignment at TopGun so he could get a home for you to grow up in so he wouldn’t have to miss a single minute of you growing up.

As you grew older a system was made. Maverick worked 5 days a week and had weekends off so he could be with you, while he worked you stayed with Carole since Goose and Maverick insisted that they had to live next door to each other.

Bradley was in 1st grade so he wasn’t home much when you were there but you always got to go with Carole to pick him up from school and you two always had playdates on Saturday’s and your families had Sunday dinner together. Bradley was like your built in best friend, despite the 3 year age gap. He was exactly like Goose while you were the spitting image of your father. It’s like a match made in heaven.

Days like today were ones that Maverick always dreaded, a new group of pilots were coming to TopGun meaning that instead of spending time in the air Maverick was stuck in his and Goose’s shared office working on new flight strategies.

“I think I would rather get stuck in another dog fight like the one after our Top Gun graduation than fill out one more paper.” Maverick sighed dropping his head to the desk

“If you’d work as much as you wined we would’ve been done by now.” Goose chuckled as Maverick groaned

Before Maverick could retort his desk phone rang he groaned and sat up before answering the phone.

“Captain Mitchell.” Maverick answered

“Mav it’s Carole. Listen don’t freak out, but I had to bring Y/N to the hospital.” Carole said and Maverick could hear the hustle and bustle of the er in the background

“What? What happened? What do you mean you brought her to the hospital?” Maverick sputtered off as he sat up straight catching Goose’s attention

“Shorty after you and Nick left this morning and we got back from taking Bradley to school Y/N got sick. She threw up a couple of times and spiked a fever, it was 103.3 so I brought her to the hospital to get checked out. They took her back a little bit ago and now I’m just waiting.” Carole said

“I’ll be there in 5 minutes.” Maverick said as he stood up

“It’s the one on base, have Nick drive you please. The last thing we need is you in here too because you drove like an idiot.” Carole scolded

“Ok ok. See you soon.” Maverick said before hanging up the phone. “We need to go to the hospital, Y/N’s sick.”

“Let’s go.” Goose immediately stood up grabbing his keys as he and Maverick hurried out into the parking lot after shouting to Ice and Slider to cover for them and that Y/N was sick

When they got to the hospital Maverick and Goose rushed up to the poor woman at the front desk almost giving her a heart attack.

“Can I help you?” She asked looking at the aviators who were still in their flight suits

“My daughter was brought in a little bit ago. Y/N Mitchell.” Maverick explained and the woman nodded

“Right. The woman who brought her in just went back a few minutes ago to see her, she’s in room 213.” The lady recited from the chart

Maverick immediately took off in that direction, leaving Goose to say thank you as he eagerly followed after his pilot. When they got to the correct room Maverick immediately rushed inside and saw his little girl curled up in the hospital bed asleep, clutching Carole’s hand as she sat next to her bed and soothingly stroked her back.

“How is she?” Maverick asked rushing to the other side of the bed and grabbing her hand

“The doctor just left. She tested positive for the flu, they said she was dehydrated and they have her some fluids and medicine to help with the nausea. She should be able to go home in a couple of hours.” Carole explained as Goose came to her side and reached up to gently pat Y/N’s leg

“My poor baby. Thank you for taking such good care of her.” Maverick told Carole thankfully

“Absolutely, she was so brave.” Carole smiled proudly

“Of course she was. Look at who her dad is.” Maverick grinned making the married couple roll their eyes

“Well we’ve got to go pick Bradley up from school, I’ll leave my car here for you.” Carole told Maverick as she handed him the car keys

“Just don’t reck the car please. Or drive it like you drive your bike.” Goose grimaced and Maverick rolled his eyes

“I’ll keep that in mind. Thanks.” Maverick said as Goose and Carole got up

“We’ll bring over some of my chicken noodle soup for dinner tonight when you guys get home.” Carole said leaning to kiss Y/N’s forehead before kissing Mavericks as well

“Thanks. See you guys later.” Maverick said as they left

Once they were gone Maverick turned back to his daughter who was fast asleep, she looked so peaceful and most importantly not in any pain or discomfort.

“Daddy.” Y/N suddenly mumbled as her eyes blinked open

“Daddy’s here baby. I’m so sorry you got sick, how are you feeling?” Maverick asked as Y/N tried to cuddle into him

“Seepy, my tummy hurt real bad but then the nice doctor gave me some medicine and then she gave me a lollipop.” Y/N smiled sleepily making Maverick smile

“What flavor was it?” Maverick asked and Y/N smiled brightly

“Cherry! My favorite!” Y/N exclaimed and Maverick laughed

“The best flavor.” Maverick smiled. “I’m so proud of you, Auntie Carole told me how brave you were. I’m so sorry daddy wasn’t here baby.”

“It’s otay daddy. Can you pwease cuddle me.” Y/N asked holding her arms out

“Oh baby, because daddy feels so bad about today you can have anything you want.” Maverick shook his head as he carefully climbed into bed next to his little girl, being careful of the wires and her iv

“Really? Can we go to Disney World with Auntie Carole Uncle Goosey and Brad Brad?” Y/N asked giving Maverick her puppy dog eyes

“I’ll see what I can do baby.” Maverick chuckled and Y/N cuddled into his side accepting his answer. “Get some more rest for me, then when we get home Auntie Carole will have her special chicken soup.”

“Otay daddy. I love you.” Y/N mumbled as she snuggled into his chest

“I love you more baby.” Maverick said kissing her forehead

That night when they got home as promised Carole and the Bradshaw boys were waiting with her homemade chicken and noodle soup. After they ate Bradley wanted to make sure Y/N was feeling better so he made her a card and they sat together on the couch watching Y/N’s favorite movie Peter Pan.

When it was time for bed Maverick decided to let Y/N sleep with him in the big bed as Y/N likes to call it since he was still worried about her and wanted to make sure she was alright.

“Goodnight baby sleep tight. I love you.” Maverick said as they cuddled up in bed

“Goodnight daddy. I love you too.” Y/N said as she rested on Mavericks chest with small puffs of air coming from her mouth as she let herself fall asleep

Maverick watched her for a few minutes to make sure she was breathing ok before he let himself fall asleep as well. Just so happy his pride and joy is ok.

[halucynator]

LUCY HELLOOOOO. your local (tumblr the state) annoying mutual is going to haunt your inbox HI <3

you said your current obsession is hazbin hotel SO. TELL ME ABOUT IT. i had no idea what it is but i just searched it up to get the gist of it and it sounds soooooo cool omg. like who’s your favorite character(s) so far!!!! what’s your favorite episode (if you have one)!! and maybe favorite dynamics and why!!! feel free to rant bestieee <3 I LOVE YOUUU and i hope you’re doing well 🫶🏽🫶🏽🫶🏽

NADINE HIIII SORRY ABOUT HOW LATE THIS IS OMG ANSJFNENSNF (also btw just so you know you can never be annoying i love getting asks from you <3) THANK YOU SM FOR THIS ASK OMG AKJSDHKASJHF

MAJOR hazbin hotel spoilers under the cut!! also mentions of stabbing and sexual themes because, well, it's hell and this show is literally about killings and its a mature content show lmao reader discretion is advised

the keep reading thing keeps moving what the fuck

hazbin hotel loml <3 djkasddsh im actually so obsessed with it you don't even get it like its crazyyy im brainrotting so hard abt this show lajshdjahsd

my favourite characters are like all of them angel, lucifer, adam, charlie and vaggie. and additional character lute bc she managed to scare adam but as i've said before this changes constantly lmao asjdhasjkdh

as i have also stated before i absolutely do NOT!! condone adams actions hes the antagonist i know and hes definitely not a good character (in fact my reaction was literally vaggies when he got stabbed oh my god akjsdjhkajshf) but HES FUNNY AS FUCK ASKJDJHASKJHFD but i assume he'd be very annoying to hang around lmao much like me <33 (just the annoying part, i havent committed mass genocide as of yet but im also only 19!! IM JOKINGDAJJSDHJKASHD) hes actually so funny and his reaction to stuff makes me laugh so hard. his reactions are so blunt like charlie literally stopping his super duper powerful attack and about to throw him and him just going 'woah what the fuck' or when charlie literally STABS him and he goes 'THE FUCK? THAT HURT' askjdasjghh everytime he was on screen i laughed so hard oh my god 😭 AND HIM GOING 'call me dickmaster' to charlie and charlie being so fed up AHKJSDHKAJSHFSLJJAHDSKJH OH MY GOD 😭 i will cry if he isnt in the next season. yes, hes a shitty character, yes i hate what he did he totally deserved that death btw but hes so fucking funny oh my god 😭

anyways, angel is just soo funny the way he deadpans everything, like something could be so important and he just goes 😐 is just so funny to me 😭 he's literally so funny to me you dont even understand lmao and his jokes alsdkhasfhjkl i saw someone say him and blitzø (from a show by the same creator set in the same place: hell) would be best friends and i totally agree alsdhasjkh also HIM PLAYING WITH THE WINDOW IN THE PILOT LIKE A LITTLE KID AKJSDHKAJSGKASGRFKSB and i feel so bad for him bc of ep 4 </3 i will cry (i did cry) like hes literally getting abused and everything is an act EVEN HIS VOICE?!??? DUDEE

lucifer oh my god eljashdjjhdg he is also so funny 😭 'my daughter wants to see me TAKE THAT DEPRESSION' IM DYING DUDEEE and his little rubber ducks 😭 ajsdhaksjdhah hes painted as such a scary character in the pilot and then you see him and youre like dude 😭 hes so funny 😭 and traumatised 😭and depressed 😭 and cute (not like appearance cute i mean like a cute dad and how he gets so happy when charlie calls him)😭 and actually not a bad dad i wish my dad was like that :(( AND HIM PICKING UP A CALL FROM HIS OWN DAUGHTER, CHARLIE, AND GOING 'HEYYY BITCHHH' ASLDKJHASKJHFAJSHJK AND LUCIFER AND ADAM LITERALLY FIGHTING AND LIKE TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER AND LUCIFER GOING 'well your first wife didnt seem to hate what i had to offer. or the second bowchikawowow' DUDE HES SO ADJKAGKFSAGKHADSGFDSAHF

charliee <333 CHARLIEEE <333 i love charlie so much she's such a lil cutie and im like a little in love with her dudeee 😭 shes the ony character in the world whose random song outbursts i can tolerate kjahdahsd her va is actually so good at voicing her oh my god and her va's singing voice wow i love ittt smmm and charlie randomly insul.ting everyone in the pilot 'ALL YOU CRETINS SLUTS AND LOSERS SEXUAL DEVIANTS AND BOOZERS AND PRESCRIPTION DRUG ABUSERS' DUDE AJSHDAJKSHDF 😭

AND VAGGIEEE!!! shes actually so smart i know like charlie knows better than to make a deal with the devil (or... not? because she does end up making one) but like vaggies is the real reason. because if vaggie wasnt there she wouldve. infact, while her and vaggie werent talking charlie actually does omg 😭 but also just shows how selfless charlie is willing to give up her freedom (ish) for her people i would never dude but anyways!! vaggie!! and the fact that stephanie beatriz voices her oh my god i love her sm her voice is sooo relaxing

AND FINALLY!! LUTE!! her traumatising adam is my favourite thing everrr adam is so fucking batshit so its soo hard to scare him and then lutes there causing adam to do a fucking double take and process it adams literaly reaction 'did you just... woah chill lute what the fuck' and like SAME ADAM SAME ALSDNASJHFJA

favourite episode? probably 6 it has like most of my favourite character (minus lucifer :(() and like angel being used an example omg and him sticking it to the moth man (valentino) OH MY GODD and niffty 😭😭 oh my god niffty shes such a menace and i love her so much my god her literally ripping his fur and then going "FOR MY COLLECTION : ) IS SO FUNNY ASJKDDHKASJHF and sir pentious' anxiety!! 'CHERRI I WOULD LIKE TO BUY YOU A DRINK... BECAUSE IM BUYING EVERYONE A DRINK HERE' AND THEN HIM GOING 'CHERRI WOULD YOU LIKE TO DO THE... SEX WITH ME' and cherri going 'uh why would we have sex' and then pentious going 'BECAUSE IM HAVING SEX WITH EVERYONE HERE' DUDE THAT HAD ME SOBBING 😭 AND EMILY!!! shes a real angel going against all the other ones standing by charlies statement that angel can, in fact, be redeemed and so can any other sinner!! her going out of her way to help charlie willing to fall even!! and they literally look like sisters asdgahsdgjgh emily is sooo charlie as an angel

favourite dynamics!!! im not exactly sure what you mean by that so sorry if i understood it wrong &lt;33

husk and angel. i am a diehard huskerdust shipper sue me. loser baby is literally so cute and theyre literally made for each other idc its literally a extrovert (angel) and introvert ish (husk) relationship much like charlie and vaggies charlie being the extrovert and vaggie being the introvert (sorta) and i just love that so muchh and the way he puts on a show for angel despite saying hes not gonna put on a show for anyone hehe UGHHH I LOVE THEM SO MUCHHHHHHHHHHHH ASLKDKHALSJKFH

lute and adam. while i dont ship them their relationship is literally so funny and probably one of the best ones imo lmao its like toxic batshit person meets toxic batshit person 😭 lute and adam are literally so crazy and LUTES REACTION WHEN ADAM DIES AND THE FIRST TIME SHE SAYS HIS NAME AND THE WAY HE SMILES AT HER AS HES SLOWLY DYING OH MY GOD MY HEARTTT I WILL LITERALLY EXPLODE AJSHFKSAJFFJHHDFFNVNMB AND THEN THEM SINGING TOGETHER IN YOU DIDNT KNOW?? (coincidentally that bit is playing rn while i typed this lmao) theyre literally such a funny duo like best duo or whattttt

charlie and vaggie. thats all. i dont even need to expand. girlfriends <3 i love them together

lucifer and alastor omg. also i do not ship them at all what the fuck ew. (sorry if you do <33 but also not sorry => this isnt specifically aimed at you nadine lol just in case someone else is reading this jjahsjfhaskjh) i just found their dad off so funny 😭 ajkdhsakjdhaksjh theyre so funny actually i cant even with them hells greatest dad is literally such a funny song and llucifer aggresively playing violin as alastor plays the piano 😭

and angel and vaggie?? like i know we dont see a lot of them but they give me sibling vibes aldhksajhajh

charlie and angel bc when she hugs him and apologises ohmy god :(( and her crying when he forgives her like HE FORGAVE MEEEEE!! also sibling dynamic lmao

charlie and emily theyre literally siblings change my mind

i can say so much more but oh my god i need to shut up lmao i wrote a tiny bit too much 😭😭

and charlie with literally anyone shes literally so pure and sweet and cute and i love her and she gets along with literally anyone (maybee apart from adam and lute lajsdhjkashf) i mean to be fair her and adams dynamic is so funny 😭 adam is literally like 'call me dickmaster' traumatising this innocent (ish) child and then her being so fed up ajsdhakjshdkfjash

PENTIOUS AND CHERRY. AHDJDNSNZBFNR. THATS ALL. I THINK THE REASON EP 6 IS MY FAVOURITE IS BC OF THEIR INTERACTIONS AJDNDNNSNC

thank you SO much for this askk <33 i love youuuu <33 and i hope your day is going amazing!!

[lgg5989]

MavDad: Family Videos

A/N: Another installment of MavDad! As always, thank you for reading, and please leave any ideas for more chapters in the comments! 🙏🏻 💜

MavDad Masterlist

Also on Ao3!

---

Bradley was digging through a few boxes that had yet to be unpacked from moving. He couldn’t find a few movies from their collection of VHS tapes. As he got to the bottom of one of the boxes, he found quite a few homemade movies that were all labeled in his mom’s handwriting. 

He decided to grab the whole box, maybe they could have a family movie night tonight. Making his way down from the attic, he called for his mom, “Hey mom, I found some homemade videos in this box, maybe we can watch them tonight?”

Carole took the box from him, letting out an excited sigh as she looked through the movies, “I thought we lost these, after we moved I couldn’t find them. They must have been put in the attic by mistake.”

“Well good thing I found them!” Brad said with a smile. 

“I would love to watch these tonight,” Carole said, “There are so many good moments that we caught on these. Your dad used to record everything when he was home.”

“Do you know when Mav will be back from Charlie's?” Brad asked her, “I was hoping he could join us too.”

“Maybe we should call him,” Carole said, “I don’t think he mentioned when he would be back.”

Brad went downstairs and got out her phone hitting the speed dial for Mav, it rang a few times before he picked up.

“What’s up Carole?” Brad heard Mav say.

“Its not Carole, its Brad,” he said, a smile on his face, “We really need to get me a phone too, I think 15 is plenty old enough.”

Mav laughed, “Maybe you are right, you’re going to be driving soon and we will need a way to contact you. What’s up bud?”

“I found some old movies that dad made in the attic today. Mom and I were going to watch them after dinner and we thought you would like to watch them with us,” Brad said quickly, “I know you are with Charlie, but maybe she can come too?”

“I would love to watch those with you guys,” Mav said, “I think Charlie is busy tonight, she just needed some help fixing one of the planes at her hangar.”

Brad sighed, disappointed, he liked Charlie, Mav seemed happier when she was around, “Okay, do you know when you will be home?”

“We just finished so I should be leaving soon, does your mom need anything from the store?” Mav asked. 

“Mom!” Brad shouted through the house, using his hand to cover the phone speaker, “Mav wants to know if you need anything from the store.”

“No honey, I think I have everything,” Carole called back.

Brad put the phone back up to his ear, “Mom says that we have everything.”

“Okay bud, I will see you in a little while then,” Mav said with a smile as he hung up the phone. 

Mav turned to Charlie as he put his phone away, “Well I think we got everything done here, do you need me for anything else?” he asked. 

“Nah, you go on home, it sounds like you have some important plans tonight,” Charlie said smiling, “and I have a hot date.”

Mav laughed, he was happy that she was getting out and seeing new people, “You better start getting ready then, don’t want to smell like jet fuel on the first date.”

“Ha ha, Mav, very funny,” she smiled at him, “See you and Brad next week for another flight?”

“I think so, he has been talking about getting his pilot's license so he needs the hours,” Mav informed her laughing a little to himself, “he is going to be able to fly before he can drive.” 

Charlie shook her head, “Well, both you and Goose are pilots, I’m not sure what else you expected.”

“You’re not wrong,” Mav said, “I better get out of here, don’t want to keep them holding dinner for me.”

Mav gave her a kiss on the cheek before mounting his bike, “See ya’ next week Charlie.”

“See ya’ then Maverick,” Charlie said just before the Ninja fired up and Mav drove out of her hangar. 

— 

Maverick got back to the house right as Brad finished setting the table for dinner. He set his helmet down in the laundry room before joining Brad and Carole in the kitchen to get his plate. 

“So Mav, how is Charlie doing?” Carole asked him. 

“She is good I think, she has a date tonight so she was excited for that,” Mav told Carole as he fixed his plate. 

“Wait, I thought you and Charlie were dating,” Brad said, suspiciously, making his way to the table. 

“No, Charlie and I are just friends,” Mav said with a sigh as he sat down, “We tried to date before but things changed and we grew apart.”

“Why?” Brad asked.

“Well at the time I was away while I was deployed and I had a bit of a reputation for being let’s say unreliable with the ladies,” Mav said, a small bit of shame on his face. While he loved that Brad looked up to him, he hoped that Bradley would listen to his mom and have more of a respect for women. It’s not that Mav didn’t respect them, he was just like any other hot shot pilot that had the world at their fingers, and at that time a woman at home was just a weight dragging you down. 

“Your dad though, he was the best, always calling and writing to your mom to share our adventures, and hear about you,” Mav said, sharing a smile with Carole. 

“My angel Goose,” Carole said with a smile as she turned to Brad, “he would go home early to go to church while your Uncle Mav closed down the bars.”

They finished up dinner and just as Brad tried to slip out of the kitchen unnoticed Carole called after him, “Young man, I believe it is your turn to wash the dishes tonight.”

“But, I was going to get the movies set up!” Brad said with a disappointed sigh. 

“You aren’t the only one who knows how to use the VHS player, Mav can set it up while you wash the dishes,” Carole said with a teasing smile, pointing her finger at the sink. 

Mav went into the living room and turned the TV on before digging through the box of movies, there was a specific one he was looking for. He found it, in Carole handwriting across the side of the tape was Brad’s First Word. This was his favorite family video because he had been recording it. 

Carole and Brad joined him once the kitchen was cleaned up. Mav popped the movie into the player and waited for it to start. The movie was filmed in their old living room, featuring a one year old Bradley crawling between Goose and Carole on the floor. Baby Bradley was babbling and making little noises that were almost words. 

“Come on Bradley, you can do it, ma-ma,” Carole said excitedly, using her baby voice. 

“Mah…” Bradley started, the word ending in a gurgle. 

Goose smiled down at Brad, “You’re doing so good Bradley, just add a v at the end Ma-v”

Carole leaned forward, “Now what do you think you’re teaching him, Nick?”

Goose gave her a grin, “Well if he isn’t going to say dada first…”

Brad smiled up at her, starting to babble again, “Ma.…Ma.…Maf.”

Carole rounded on Goose, whose hands were now up in the air, “Now honey, I was just having a little fun…” he started. 

Carole frowned, “He was going to say ma-ma first and you taught him to say Mav instead?”

“Now sweetie, he didn’t say Mav, he said maf,” Goose started, hands still raised, “ya’ know there is a slight difference.”

Carole couldn’t fight the smile that took over her face, “If you weren’t so darn cute, I’d be so mad right now.”

Goose dropped his hands down to his chest, and in his goofiest voice said, “Oh honey, I’m blushing.”

Carole laughed at his antics, “Goose, you big stud, take me to bed or lose me forever!”

“Show me the way home honey!” Goose said, picking Carole up bridal style before making his way up the stairs.

“You take care of my son now Mav!” was shouted from upstairs before a door slammed shut.

Mav put the camera on the table, walking into the frame to pick Bradley up, “Well, its just you and me then bud.”

As Mav reached to turn the camera off, Brad started to babble again, looking up at him, “Maf.”

A huge smile spread across Maverick’s face before he turned the camera off.

[roadtogracelandx45]

All in Heartbeat| Top Gun/ Top Gun Maverick | 1 of 3

@luckyladycreator2 @prettyinpayne

Masterlist

All In A Heartbeat 

Summary: All it took was 2 seconds for a distracted truck driver to blow through the red light and slam into Charlotte’s vintage convertible and flip it over several times. Leaving both Charlotte and Bianca in critical condition. 

IceMav

Past Mav/Charlie

Rated M for language and graphic descriptions of car accidents and surgical stuff 

          Also I don’t know much about surgeries or how things are done in the OR. I am taking what  I learned from watching ER and Chicago Med. 

~*~

All it could take a millisecond for everything to change in someone’s lives and that millisecond happened on the first day of summer vacation for Bianca Kazansky, Charlotte Blackwood the woman that carried her for Iceman and Maverick had picked her up to go to the bookstore  and hang out for awhile. 

It was a tradition that they always did. And it gave the girl a break from spending most of her free time with her grandparents and great grandfather, who told a lot of horror stories about Russia, Germany, and the world wars.  That was something that Bianca needed to hear until she was a lot older, like she was in her 20s.  

Charlotte was shaken out of her thoughts when Bianca’s voice asked, “Charlie? Were things always this strange between Dad and Mav?” Charlotte glanced at the girl who was seated across from at the small diner they visited frequently. “You mean the on and off, hot and cold?” Bianca nodded her head brushing some of her hair behind her ear as she did so. 

“Yes, it has always been like that. Maverick was very unstable and out of control when we first met him. He felt like he didn’t need to prove himself, he was already the best of the best.”  

Bianca’s mouth twitched like it was going to form a smile but fell quickly. 

“Did he take off again?”

 “Yeah, left yesterday before I got up for school. Didn’t bother to say goodbye.” Bianca refused to let Charlie see how truly upset she was by his leaving. “He was like that with me when Goose died.” 

The girl perked up a little bit, she had heard the stories of Goose and Maverick and their shenanigans and was curious.  Goose was the one subject that was rarely spoke about in the Mitchell-Kazansky household. And Bradley, Goose’s son didn’t remember much of him either and shut down when he was mentioned. So Bianca kept her curiosity to herself, which was one thing she was never good at.   

“Maverick is never good at staying in one place. This is the longest he has been settled in. That’s because of you and because of Bradley.”  

Bianca nodded her head and took a sip of her drink. 'Are you leaving back to the academy too?’ For the last several years, Charlie had been teaching at the Naval Academy and came back to California during the summer breaks.

 “At the end of next week. They want me back sooner, they have a bunch of new cadets coming in. Did you decide on what you want to do when you grow up?”  

Bianca was turning 14  on the 17th of that month and was going into high school in the fall. And Charlie wanted to try and be there for her as much as she could. 

“Yeah, I want to go to the academy, and I think I want to be a lawyer.” “No Aviation for you?” The older woman questioned. “It's a harder program to get into and I don’t want to live up to my dad’s name ya know? Or Duke’s.”  Duke was Maverick’s father that disappeared on a mission and it was a long standing scandal making the Mitchell name not the best.  “Never say never kiddo, I think you are too much like both of your dads to stay grounded.” “That’s true.” Bianca agreed, “I do have a fall back plan just in case I can’t get into the academy.”

 Charlie raised her eyebrow in question. “Berkley and law school. I am not going to get my hopes up with the academy.”  The blonde smirked, she knew that Bianca was too much like her and too much like her fathers to give up a dream.  Especially one like the Naval Academy and the pilot program. “Come on kiddo, lets go to the book store and get you some summer reading so your great grandfather and grandpa do scare you to death with their war stories.” “But sometimes Charlie, I like the scary ones.” Bianca grinned as she pulled out several bills from her wallet and dropped on the table. 

~*~

Because of the light rain that they had, Charlie left the top on her convertible, making it more confined which she didn’t like but she had Bianca with her and she wouldn’t risk her getting sick over anything in the world. She may not have legal claim to her, that fell to Iceman and Maverick, but she did have that motherly instinct towards her. “There is this book I want to read about World War 2.” Bianca commented as she pulled out of the parking lot, “It's about the parachute infantry.”

 Seeing the look on Charlie’s face, she laughed, “I saw something on HBO about it and it got me curious.” Curiosity killed the cat and in most cases it could be the best of her. That's how she learned about Duke, at least the stuff she could do without having clearance for anything. 

“Well, let’s see what we,” the rest was cut off by squealing of brakes and Bianca screaming as the truck came closer and closer to them. Not sure what else she could since it was already on them, Charlie took her hand in hers and squeezed it. Once the truck hit the passenger side the car flung around in a circle so the front was pointing towards the direction where they had come from. Bianca’s screams of terror were the last thing that Charlie remembered hearing as another car slammed on its breaks trying to aviod the accident and smashed into the front of the car. The driver of the truck got out of the cab quickly and dialed 911 to come to the scene. 

“Charlie!” Bianca shouted as she tried to remove her seat belt from her lap, ‘Charlie! Wake up! Please!”  

“Hey sweetheart it's going to be okay.” The truck driver said, peering into the window at her, “The paramedics are on their way. And they will get you and your mom out of here.”  Bianca didn’t even register the comment, she was too busy trying to pry the seatbelt off, her fingers bleeding from the shattered glass that laid on her lap, her vision had started become blurred with blood for the open wound she had on top of her head along with the bits and pieces in her neck.  “Ice.” She muttered as she stopped pulling as hard on the seatbelt. “I am sorry?” It wasn’t the truck driver, it was an EMT. “I want my dad. He is a commander with the Navy.” She said, ‘your dad’s name is ice?” A fireman asked, distracting her from the noises of the jaws of life. “It’s his call sign. He is a pilot.” She started to fade a little bit from the pain and from the blood loss. 

“Hey, what’s your name?” The fire fighter asked again, pulling her attention back to him. 

“Bianca. Bianca Kazansky.”  The man’s eyes went wide, his brother served in the Navy and was a pilot with them and told him about Commander and how ice cold he was. Never showing any emotions except for when it came to his daughter. “Hey Bianca, sweetie, keep your eyes open.’ He said, her eyelids were fluttering, getting heavier and heavier with each one. “Bianca!” He called snapping his fingers by her ears, she glanced at him once more and then fully closed her eyes. 

[anextraordinarymuse]

Thoughts on 1x01: Pilot

So @jonesgirl88 and I have been struggling to nail down the timeline of Signed, Sealed, Delivered (Katie likes puzzles and I'm an analyzer, but it's also helpful for fic writing purposes). I went back and re-watched it all from the very first episode, and, well ... I have Thoughts™.

First, and unrelated to anything to do with Oliver x Shane ... Oliver had some great one liners in the pilot. "I have a government service pay level higher than you can count", and "It's Shakespeare, peasants." Perfection!

Okay, at the time of the pilot we learn that Shane's dad has died some time in the last 14 months. We also learn that her dad is the reason that Shane is a rule breaker now despite being a rule follower at heart (she went to see him in the hospital, was turned away because it was outside of visiting hours, and then her dad died in the night before she could work things out with him/apologize/say goodbye). So, Shane's rebellious streak is fairly new when she meets Oliver. Also, Oliver and Shane are (at heart) more alike than either of them initially realizes.

Charlie and Kelly (the letter and characters that the pilot story follows) and their story foreshadows Oliver and Shane's story, but you only start to understand that on a second watch through. (Actually, in many ways, every story in every episode mirrors Oliver and Shane and their journey to each other to some extent). Examples: Charlie is working at a job that is just a job to him and is stuck in a rut when he meets Kelly (this is Shane; she tells Oliver that their job is "just a job, not some woo woo spiritual journey."); Kelly isn't really living her life because she's dying and has mostly accepted it, but changes her mind and wants to live after she meets Charlie (this is Oliver; he's alive but not living, and it's only Shane's arrival that makes him want to change). Kelly and Charlie spend one day together and then are separated for a year - a year in which Kelly has to put in the time and the effort to change and get better (health-wise) before she can meet Charlie where he is when she meets him. He's ready to jump in feet first immediately, but Kelly isn't.

Shane is ready to jump in feet first immediately when she meets Oliver, but Oliver has work that he has to do before he can meet her where she is (not just Holly, but in figuring out how to let himself move on and learn to live again).

Shane picks up on the fact that Rita has feelings for Norman as soon as meets them despite the fact that Norman is totally clueless. When they're in the bar toward the end of the episode, Rita asks Norman to dance and he redirects and asks to play shuffle board instead. The camera shows us both Shane and Oliver's reaction to that: Oliver's expression is more subtle, but they both know that Norman is missing the point and a chance right there by declining. After Norman and Rita walk away, Shane says "she has a terrible crush on him, you know that right?" And Oliver replies "that's very insightful, considering she absolutely terrifies him." Who says which line is very telling here (as we'll soon start to see): Shane has a terrible crush on Oliver, and she terrifies him. Mostly because she is unwilling to let him stay frozen: Shane expects more from Oliver than anyone else he knows and won't let him remain stuck. We can safely say even from this pilot episode that Oliver isn't the biggest fan of change, and can be very resistant to it (but will eventually warm up to change, given time).

On a side note, and I've already mentioned this before, but Oliver and Shane have absolutely zero concept of personal space from the get go. 90% of the time they stand close enough to touch each other for absolutely no reason. (Their arms and shoulders often brush or touch each other). And in almost every shot where it shows the four of our postables standing together, Shane is alone on one side of Oliver and Norman and Rita default to the other side, or Shane and Oliver are next to each other regardless of where Rita and Norman are standing. The only time Rita or Norman stand or sit between Oliver and Shane is when they aren't getting along; otherwise, there's literally nothing (physical) separating Shane and Oliver. This blocking visually establishes the connection between these two, and it does it right from the start.

Here's examples of what I mean about the blocking.

Example 1:

Example 2:

Example 3:

Example 4:

Oliver and Shane start healing each other from day one. They start giving up little pieces of their pain and trauma immediately. Oliver tells Shane about his wife; Shane tells him about her dad; she calls him out on not facing the truth and finding his wife; he calls her out on not wanting to open her birthday card and face her pain. But at the end of the episode, they both rise to the other person's challenge: Oliver gives Charlie a sewing kit that he took from the hotel in DC that he stayed in when Holly left him (literally giving away a piece of his pain); Shane opens her birthday card from her father and uses the $20 inside to buy coffee for herself and the others. Shane and Oliver are each other's catalyst for change and healing.

Oliver's change is also reflected in the fate of the DLO. At one point in the pilot the DLO is being shut down because it's no longer viable/has outlived its purpose. At the end of the episode, rather than being shut down the DLO is actually expanded (or, you know ... it grows/changes). Oliver is the DLO, and both needed Shane's arrival and presence to move forward.

Remember a few paragraphs ago when I said that Oliver and Shane both witnessed Norman's missed (or given up) opportunity to dance with Rita? Well, Oliver doesn't miss or pass up his chance to dance with Shane even though we learn later on that he apparently doesn't dance. Shane has already challenged and goaded Oliver several times in the episode by this point (even pleaded with him at one point) and he has ignored several of them or resisted her ideas and influence, but he still doesn't let this opportunity go without answer. In fact, it's interesting that in a professional capacity Oliver is rather resistant to Shane and her influence: he won't keep reading the letter, he won't just deliver the letter to Charlie even though they're standing right outside his house ... Oliver won't step out of bounds despite all of Shane's pleading and prodding. But personally? Oliver blows right through his self-imposed boundaries. During their first meeting Oliver says he won't call her Shane, but he proceeds to do it twice later in the episode (once even calling her "my dear Shane"); she tries to leave and he immediately goes after her and doesn't accept her attempt to quit; we only find this one out later, but apparently Oliver doesn't dance ... yet he dances with Shane the first time she asks.

This is a masterful way to introduce us to the division and dichotomy that exists in Oliver (and that becomes more apparent as we go, specifically between Holly and Shane). One of my favorite things about this show is how they establish Shane and Oliver's connection not just from the beginning, but through multiple mediums and layers.

We'll explore all of this more in episode two.

[babbushka]

Mind & Soul (5/10)

The story of how one man fell out of love and into it again

Charlie (Marriage Story) x Reader

6.8k; warnings for angst, marital affairs/cheating, nsfw content 

Tumblr masterlist for previous chapters // Available on AO3

                                                       ---------------

Lately, I find myself out gazing at stars

Hearing guitars like someone in love

Sometimes the things I do astound me

Mostly whenever you're around me

 Charlie used to love flying, before all this. He used to get such a thrill from the way his stomach would swoop as the plane would take off, would look out the window and marvel at how the Earth seemed so far away, so small. Buildings and cars and people no bigger than ants, while he sat in a great metal bird in the sky.

He doesn’t bother to open the shade now, exhausted of flying, exhausted from all the travel.

But Henry pushes the shade up, because Henry has the window seat, and now it’s his turn to stare with wide-eyed amazement at the way the world comes back into view from behind a thick blanket of clouds. Henry presses his face to the window, and when he looks up at Charlie with a big smile around a mouthful of chewing gum so his ears don’t hurt from the descent, despite the aches in his bones, Charlie smiles back.

“Are we almost there?” He asks, recognizing the monuments, finger pointing at the window.

“Should be, look, see they’re coming to collect our trash.” Charlie pulls off his headphones, stuffs them in his pocket. The flight attendants are making their rounds with a bleached smile and gentle wake-ups of passengers who had fallen asleep on the journey. They’re coming his way, so Charlie turns to Henry and picks up the little bag of goldfish from the airport and asks, “Are you finished with these?”

“Yeah I accidentally dropped one on the floor.” Henry makes that half-frown that kids make sometimes when they’re worried they’re going to get in trouble.

“That’s okay, just be careful not to step on it, it makes more of a mess that way.” Charlie smiles at him even though he’s too tired to really manage the muscles, shows him that it’s okay.

“I’ll be careful I promise, I accidentally stepped on a snail at mom’s apartment and I cried.” Henry whispers in Charlie’s ear, again worried that he’d be yelled at. Charlie wonders who was snapping at his son to make him fear every little admission. But Henry doesn’t seem upset, he shrugs and sits back in his seat with a, “So now I watch where I’m going better.”

“I’m sure the snail knew you didn’t mean it.” Charlie replies, although his brain is caught up more on the mention of Nicole than anything. He swallows hard, gives the stewardess the small empty bag of snacks and tries as casually as he can to muster up, “Do you like it, mom’s apartment?”

“Yeah there’s lots of kids who are all really nice, and the flowers are pretty. We go to the beach a lot and mom says I’m going to get tan, I’ve got a really good seashell collection so far. But it’s really hot.” Henry looks out at the night sky. “Like sticky all the time. Sometimes I feel like when I go out onto the balcony I can drink the water in the air.”

Charlie frowns, buckles Henry’s seatbelt when the little sign lights up.

“She’s got air conditioning, doesn’t she?” Charlie asks, as he buckles his own. He tries not to sound accusatory.

“Yeah but it’s still hot.” Henry replies, like it’s the easiest thing in the world.

And maybe it is.

Some things are easy, like the weather. That’s why everyone went to it for small talk, nothing easier than commenting about the weather.

It had been hot, when Charlie and Nicole had gotten into the fight.

 He doesn’t want to think about it, the things they said. The way they both raged and shouted at one another in white stucco walls, bare walls with next-to-nothing of his own design, his own choice. He had called you, had asked you what to put up on those walls, and then, well. It didn’t matter much, did it? He went and ruined it, punched a hole straight through the whole thing.

He doesn’t want to think about the things he said. The way vitriol spit from his mouth, the way his face contorted and pinched and grew red hot, the way he could feel the blood pounding in his ears. How he had been fuelled by spite and hate and blind panic, panic because this was all going so wrong, so badly. It was going badly. He regrets it, what he says. He regrets a lot of it.

He doesn’t want to think about how true they all were, on both sides, and how painful that truth was. The words screamed screamed screamed at one another with shaking fists of fury. Who was this woman that he had married? And who had he become?

 No, YOU fuck off. If you listened to your son, or anyone, he’d tell you he’d rather live here.

He tells you because he knows it’s what you want to HEAR!

 Voices of his own hatred and fear and pain echo in his ears, pain and rage that he’s never felt before.

 You’re being so much like your father.

DO NOT compare me to my father. You’re exactly like your mother! Everything you complain about her, you’re doing. You’re suffocating Henry.

 He tries to blink back tears, as the plane soars through the sky. He feels sick, he’s exhausted. He wonders if Henry would forgive him if he went and threw up in the little bathroom that he can’t even fit in.

 I felt repulsed when you touched me. The thought of having sex with you makes me want to peel my skin off.

You’ll never be happy. In LA or anywhere. You’ll think you found some better, opposite guy than me and in a few years you’ll rebel against him because you need to have your VOICE. But you don’t WANT a voice. You just want to fucking complain about not having a VOICE.

 He looks out the window, his hands shake. He says he’ll be right back, as his feet carry him away, down the aisle despite the protesting flight attendants. They take one look at him and let him go, let him wedge himself into the bathroom.

 You gaslighted me. You’re a fucking villain.

You want to present yourself as a victim because it’s a good legal strategy, FINE. But you and I both know you CHOSE this life. You wanted it until you didn’t.

 He braces himself against the little counter, splashes water on his face. He can’t cry now, not yet. Henry needs him, he’ll need to hold Charlie’s hand because the landing part always scares him. He tries sucking tears back into his eyes, tilts his face up so they might just…reabsorb into his eyeballs. He doesn’t know.

 You’re so merged with your own selfishness that you don’t even identify it as selfishness anymore. YOU’RE SUCH A DICK.

Every day I wake up and hope you’re dead-- Dead like--If I could guarantee Henry would be OK, I’d hope you get an illness and then get hit by a car and DIE.

 The words are whiplash, when they come back, and he’s got a white-knuckle grip on the tiny counter, gets jostled around as the plane hits turbulence as it begins to descend. He should go back to his seat, he can hear the seatbelt sign dinging, can hear the pilot over the loudspeaker.

 I know.

I’m sorry.

Me too.

 Was he?

 He splashes himself with water again, gets a grip. Leaves the bathroom, apologizes to the attendants as he quickly walks to his seat. He’s glad there was no one on the aisle side for his row, glad the plane was relatively empty, calm in the navy night.  

“Are you excited to see the new house?” Charlie says in case Henry can see him in the dark.

“Yes!” Henry’s eyes shine happily and he turns to face his dad, “Mom said it’s got a big backyard, is that true?”

“A really big backyard, bigger than our old one. If you want we can get a pool and go swimming in the summer, you can invite all your friends over for a pool party.” Charlie promises. He’ll promise anything, at this point, anything Henry wants.

“Okay but only if there’s sno-cones, Billy had a birthday party and they had sno-cones and they were so good my mouth was stained for three days.” Henry laughed quietly to himself, and it kills Charlie that he wasn’t there to see it.

“We can have sno-cones. What else did you do with mom?” He wills his voice not to crack.

“Um,” Henry thinks around a yawn, “We went to the parks a lot. I’m learning how to roller skate.”

“Really? You’re brave, I’m too afraid of falling.” Charlie ruffles Henry’s hair.

“It’s not so bad, I’ve got knee-pads and everything.” Henry laughs and ducks out of the motion, playfully avoiding getting his hair messed up. It’s long, he needs a cut, Charlie thinks. “When we get home I’ll show you.”

“I’m going to hold you to that,” Charlie nods, and then he notices that the plane is dipping more dramatically, so he offers a big palm to his son and smiles, “Here hold my hand, we’re landing, chew your gum really fast.”

The landing is easy, only a little bumpy which Charlie’s thankful for. He didn’t know what kind of metaphor that would be, if the whole flight back home was rough. But the plane lands, and they’re on the tarmac, and the passengers all sleepily applaud in that way that they always do, and Henry makes a face.

“How come people are clapping?” Henry asks kind of loudly, innocently judgmental in that way kids can be.

“They’re thanking the pilot for doing a good job.” Charlie explains.

“Why don’t they just thank him then?” Henry doesn’t buy it, and Charlie chuckles to himself.

This really is his kid, he thinks. He tries not to cry.

“We can thank him when we leave.” Charlie unbuckles their seatbelts, and he can tell Henry is antsy to stretch his legs.

“Should we stand up now?” Henry asks, always filled with questions this one.

“No.” Charlie shakes his head on response, only to have his son look around him with a raised eyebrow.

“But they’re all standing.” He gestures to people crowding the aisle.

“That’s because they’re impatient.” Charlie mutters, not wanting to piss anyone off. He feels like he’d snap if someone challenged him on something, even something small. “They can’t go anywhere, it takes the pilot a long time to make sure everything’s okay with the plane before they open the doors.”

“You’re really smart dad.” Henry sighs and rests his head against Charlie’s bicep and says so soft that Charlie almost misses it, “I missed you.”

“I missed you too honey.” Charlie blinks, the ache in his heart slowly healing, trying its best to hold itself together until he can sob into his pillow.

Now that they’re landed, Charlie can pull his cell-phone out – his regular one, not the burner phone – and thumbs through his contacts. His heart leaps in his throat when he opens up your messages, half-expecting to find a picture of your tits right there in his face. But no, he only finds the innocent messages of friends.

We landed, should be off the plane in 20. He types up, hits send and anxiously awaits your reply.

“Who are you texting?” Henry peers over his arm, nosy.

“(Y/N), she’s going to pick us up from the airport and drop us at home.” Charlie shows him, because there’s nothing to see except plans and flight numbers that he sent you so you could figure out the best time to leave the house.

“(Y/N)! I have something for her.” Henry brightens up immensely, and he doesn’t know why, but Charlie’s relieved by that.

His phone buzzes before the screen even has a chance to go dark, and he smiles at the response:

Okay! I’m circling, JFK’s a nightmare right now. Let me know when you’re close. Can’t wait to see you!

“Oh yeah, what?” Charlie asks as he puts the phone away back in his pocket.

“No I can’t tell you, it’s a surprise and you’re awful about keeping surprises.” Henry rolls his eyes and laughs as Charlie ruffles his hair again.

“Okay okay, fair enough.”  He replies.

                                                     -----------------

Once they’re off the plane and away from the luggage carousel, once they’re down by the pick-up and drop off area, does Charlie feel warm. It’s a crisp forty-five degrees, and he’s in a sweater, but  he knows it’s really because of you, because he knows soon he’ll see you.

You spot them before they can spot you, and he swears he’s dreaming when he sees your car pull up, when he sees you jump out of the driver’s side and open the trunk. He’s hot all over, itchy, he wants to hold you, wants to hug you.

It’s been two weeks since he’s seen you, and fuck, oh fuck does he just want to hold you.

“Hi guys!” You laugh in excitement as the wind from the terminal tunnel fluffs up your hair. “Here, let me help, you must be tired.”

You come around and grab their suitcases, and part of him knows he should do it, but with his arm fucked up the way it is, he isn’t so sure he can. But the second you’re finished, he pulls you into a tight hug.

“You bet, thank you so much for getting us.” Charlie whispers, and he can feel you shudder out a sigh of relief into the embrace.

“Of course, how’s my favorite Henry?” You say when you pull away and crouch to his level so he can run into your arms.

“I’m your only Henry!” He points out, laughing as you pick him up and swing him around playfully before setting him down.

“Shh, don’t tell the others.” You wink, opening the back door for him and ushering him inside, “Come on, buckle in, safety first.”

You all climb into the car, and Charlie can’t stop looking at you. After two weeks of not having you, you’re finally here. He’s jumpy, he wants to tackle you. But you’re driving, and he’s exhausted, and his arm hurts.

He’s so tired, but it’s a good kind of tired, now that he’s with you.

“How was the flight?” You ask the car, look at Henry through the rearview mirror for a second before turning your eyes back to the road.

“Good, not too bumpy.” Henry says happily, watching the city lights zip past the window as you keep up with the speeding traffic. “I had goldfish.”

“I hope they didn’t spoil your appetite, I was thinking we could go out for some pizza. What do you think?” You smile, just happy for them to be back, happy for them to be home.

“I think I’d kill for a slice.” Charlie says, and fuck he’s struck by how badly he wants to hold your hand. “How about you, Henry?”

“Yes!” His son cheers at the idea of proper pizza, and Charlie smiles sadly.

LA had a lot of things, but New York did too.

He nudges his hand against yours gently, carefully, only for the briefest of seconds before he’s pulling back.

New York had you.

                                                  -------------------------

Lately I seem to walk as though I had wings

Bump into things like someone in love

Each time I look at you

I'm limp as a glove

And feeling like someone in love

 It’s late, but that doesn’t matter for the city that never sleeps. You make a pitstop at a favorite place, a little corner shop that only sells slices. The pizza is thin and folds in half like a dream, and Charlie can’t stop wolfing it down, can’t stop shoving it into his mouth. Nothing feels more like home than New York pizza, he thinks.

Especially when you and Henry are laughing about him behind your own slices.

It feels all too familiar, feels like it did when Nicole had fucked off for what Charlie thought was forever, when for six months Charlie cared for his son all on his own. Well, that’s a lie, remembering how so many nights were spent at this pizza joint, you and Henry laughing at him.

He hadn’t cared for his son all on his own.

“Hey Henry, what do you think about (Y/N) joining us for dinner tomorrow after you get back from school?” Charlie asks somewhat seriously, knowing that he’s killing the mood. But it’s an important question, and Henry can tell, even as he frowns.

“Why’d’ya ask it like that?” Henry asks before taking a big bite of crust.

“Well just because we’re going to have someone from the state come in and watch us, and I want to know if you’d rather have (Y/N) there for that or not.” He explains, looking at you before looking at his son. And as much as it hurts him to think of excluding you, he knows that whatever Henry is more comfortable with, he’d do. “It can be just the two of us, if you’d like.”

“Why’s someone watching us?” Henry asks, not angry or anything, just curious.

“Just to see how we are as a family, that’s all.” Charlie says.

He doesn’t say that it’s to see how fit he is as a parent, doesn’t say that it’s to make sure the house is livable, suitable, the best place for him. He doesn’t say there’s so much fucking pressure on this dinner to go well, doesn’t say that if anything bad happens they’ll side with Nicole and Nicole will win and he can’t have her win he just can’t –

“Well if they want to see the family, (Y/N)’s gotta be there too.” Henry says softly, like he’s nervous about it, and it shocks Charlie out of his own inner monologue. Henry looks at you, and almost like he’s worried you’re going to reject his broken family, he asks, “Don’t you?”

“If you want me, Henry.” You reply with a nod, because really, really this is about him.

About what’s best for him and his wants. He’s just a child, he shouldn’t have to know everything that he wants, shouldn’t have to have his whole upbringing uprooted because of it. But that’s what Nicole did to them, and that’s the way it is.

He’s old enough to know that, and it breaks Charlie’s heart.

“Yeah, you should be there.” Henry says, picking at some of the melted cheese that fell onto his piece of parchment paper.

You look at one another, and then you look at Charlie, and he doesn’t know how he isn’t supposed to cry. You can tell and so you stand up quickly, check your phone for the time.

“It’s getting late, I gotta drop you guys off at home! Want another slice to go? There’s nothing in your fridge, didn’t want it to spoil while your dad was away.” You say warmly, in that way that you always do, always there to diffuse a situation before it can even begin.

Charlie shakes himself, tries to get a grip. He doesn’t ever want to be a situation for you.

                                      ----------------------------------

Henry is practically falling asleep on the drive into the suburb where Charlie lives, where the new house is. You’d done a real good fucking number on it, turning it into a home while he was gone. It wasn’t something Charlie had any energy for, and so you took the two weeks to furnish it with things you thought they’d like. Henry is seeing it for the first time, but in a way, so is Charlie.

“Why don’t you go ahead honey?” Charlie says giving him the keys to go unlock the front door. “I’ll explore the house with you tomorrow, I’m beat.”

“Me too, time’s different here.” Henry says, and you chuckle a little at the way he’s jet-lagged like some old weary traveler. Henry grabs his backpack and runs into the house calling, “’Night dad, ‘night (Y/N)!”

“See you tomorrow sweetie.” You call after him, as Charlie comes around to your window and leans his arms against it. You look at him sadly, reach up to cup his cheek. He immediately leans into the touch, starved of you. “You okay?”

“Yeah, just wanted to look at you a little more.” He says, kisses your palm. It’s dark in the suburb, only a couple streetlights lit. “Do you really have to go?”

“Now that Henry’s back we have to be more careful, you know that.” You sigh, and you’re right, he knows you’re right. “Call me if you need me, okay?”

“What if I need you now?” He tries, but you only pinch his cheek and give it a little pat.

“Bye Charlie.” You say, and he steps away from your car.

He watches you drive down the road, watches as you always remember to use your blinker, before disappearing around the corner.

He feels empty as soon as you’re gone.

                                      --------------------------------------

Lately I seem to walk as though I had wings

Bump into things like someone in love

Each time I look at you

I'm limp as a glove

And feeling like someone in love

Feeling like someone in love

In love

 The house is too quiet, dark.

He closes the front door, drops his luggage. He’s exhausted, fuck he’s so tired. He’s so tired, the kind of tired that’s settled too deep into his bones, that no amount of sleep can fix. He’s tired, and he’s terrified, but he’s too frayed around the edges to really feel it, to really feel anything.

Henry has already run up the stairs, already found his room. Charlie can hear the excited happy noises as Henry’s light-up sneakers illuminate the hallway. He’s found the bluetooth radio Charlie got him on a whim, and is playing some song Charlie doesn’t know.

Charlie makes his way up to the master bedroom, something foreign and new and yet filled with you. Your mark is absolutely everywhere, even in the very floorboards. He drops his luggage and steps out of his shoes, feeling like garbage as he makes his way to the shower. He just wants to scrub the day away, just wants to scrub the feeling of slimy dirty Los Angeles away, wants the New York water to rinse his sins down the drain.

He turns the water hot as it will go, scalding, and when he strips himself down and changes the dressings on the deep gash in his arm, he stares at himself in the mirror. He doesn’t know who he is anymore, what he’s doing anymore. He doesn’t know. The whole thing feels fruitless, feels pointless. He wants to smash the mirror, when he sees the bags under his eyes.

“God, I hate, this!” He says at himself in the mirror no one there to hear him. Henry’s all the way on the other side of the house, has music playing off his phone. The music and the rush of the shower drown out the sound of his shout.

He steps under the spray, leans himself up against the cold tile wall and just watches as water swirls at his feet. He needs to get clean, he knows, he won’t crawl into bed until he is, and fuck, does he desperately want to be in bed.

He wants to feel the cool sheets on his skin, wants to breathe in the scent of his pillow. He wonders if they still smell like you. You’ve been checking on the house while he was away screaming at Nicole, you slept in his bed. He wonders if you touched yourself under his covers.

His hand reaches for his dick before he even really knows it, just at the simple thought of you.

You, you, you.

He misses you.

He’s missed you the entire time he went away to fucking LA.

He thinks about how you would have been with him, how you would have looked. He thinks about how you would have smiled at him in the mornings, how that smile would have cut through the fog. He thinks about you, how you would have warmed the side of the bed next to his, how your breath on his face would have woken him, how your moans would have filled the space of the shitty little apartment he’s punched a hole in.

“(Y/N),” He lets his head tip back against the cold tile as soap and suds run down his body, as they slick up his cock, as he jerks himself off, “Oh, (Y/N).”

He thinks about how you would have fucked him, let him fuck you, after the bullshit. After the fight. He wonders if the fight would have even happened, if you had been there with him. He wonders if anything bad could ever happen if you’re there.

He speeds up his hand, grip on himself tight, trying to emulate your own hand. Your hands are soft, they’re supple, they’re well manicured and they know how to twist and grope and squeeze him just right. He imagines you on your knees in front of him, imagines the way soap would wash down in between your breasts imagines the way you’d guide his cock to your lips –

“Fuck,” He’s groaning, smacking his head against the wall as his hips buck into his hand, as he fucks his hand, wishing he were fucking you.

God, all he wants is you.

He comes all over his chest, nearly loses his footing, because he doesn’t realize it, but he’s used your body soap that you kept in the shower and now he smells like you and that’s so overwhelming that he’s afraid he’ll black out.

His heart hurts, when he comes down from his high, and he watches as the evidence of his arousal winds down and around, going down the drain, like so much in his life.

He throws a hand out and shuts off the water, desperate for you. He knows he can call, he knows, you always pick up. He’s got the little burner phone with just one number programmed in. He can’t save it, he’s too afraid to save it, but if anyone were to look at the call log, it’s all you, just you.

He fumbles out of the shower to get himself dried off, stumbles into bed. The wound on his arm is bleeding, again, and he has a spike of panic that the bandages won’t be enough, again. He’ll deal with it later, in the morning, he doesn’t give a shit.

Right now all he needs is you.

The burner phone is in his pants pocket, right where he abandoned it next to the bed. He squints against the bright light of the screen as his fingers already know where to go, his hand already knows what to do. He can’t bear to bring it up to his face, not right now, not like this, so instead he rests the phone on his chest and turns it on speaker, listening to it as it rings.

“Pick up, pick up, pick up.” He begs the universe, eyes closed, fingers crossed, hoping hoping hoping it’s not too late.

“Charlie?” You ask, and fuck, oh fuck, he could cry, maybe he is crying, because that’s your voice. It’s music to his ears, it’s an original score winning best awards in every show, it’s a symphony at the philharmonic and he wants to give you a standing ovation as you ask, “Is everything okay?”

You’re worried, concerned for him. That brings him down to earth, the worry.

“Yeah, it’s – no it’s not. Fuck, are you, can you – ” He can’t lie to you now, but he doesn’t know what the fuck to even say, he doesn’t know.

You’re so good to him, so kind to him, so patient. He doesn’t know, but you do, you do because he can hear shuffling on the other end of the line, can hear you throwing the sheets off of your body, can hear you rummaging in your dresser for clothes.

“I’m on my way, I’ll be there in ten minutes.” You say, you promise, and it feels like he’s just been granted some illegal wish, some chance he shouldn’t have.

His hands shake as they rake through his wet hair, as he licks his lips, as he tries to tell himself to stay calm for just ten minutes, it’s only ten more minutes without you.

“Door’s unlocked.” He whispers into the phone, and you’re nodding, he can tell you’re nodding, by the way the phone statics up.

“Love you.” You say, and damn, no one’s said that to him in so long.

No one’s said it and meant it, other than you.

  Ten minutes feels like ten years, when he’s in bed without you. He waits, just waits for you, his ears trained on the front door, waiting waiting waiting. He nearly falls off the bed when he hears you, finally, stepping into the house and locking up behind him. You come up the stairs two at a time, push open the bedroom door and take in the sight of him.

He���s managed to pull on sleep-pants, something soft and long to warm him, but he’s bare chested and his arm is still bandaged, and you tend to that first.

“Oh Charlie honey, what the hell happened, to you?” You ask, collecting him in your arms.

Something about that, about that simple embrace, has him sobbing in your hands. He’s been so emotional, this whole fucking week, so emotional. He doesn’t know how to handle any of it, it’s all so new, all so stressful. He’s so fucking stressed out, so he cries and cries and you just hold him tight as he clings to you.

You’re talking about the cut on his arm, the one that you now see because he’s shirtless. He’d been wearing a sweater since the airport was always fucking freezing, and you hadn’t seen it. But now you do, and that’s what you’re talking about, even though really you could have been talking about his whole life.

What the hell happened to him?

“It was stupid – I did that dumb fucking thing with the knife – ” He tries to explain, and you’re immediately rummaging through his pants.

“Where is it?” You ask, not unkindly, just insistently.

“What?” He’s confused, he’s so wrapped up in the thought of you, in the thought of you actually being here with him, that he missed the question.

You lean down to kiss him, and Charlie’s whole body tingles, his whole self comes alive. He’s never felt so alive, as to when you kiss him.

“The knife, the keys. Where is it?” You ask gently, rubbing a soothing little circle on his cheek.

“It’s on the night-stand.” He answers, leaning over and grabbing them, handing them to you, offering them to you.

He’d offer anything to you.

He’s offering you everything he has.

You take them and unclip the knife off the keychain, throw it into the waste basket, collect his face up in your hands again, kiss him again. You kiss him over and over and his sobs subside into hiccupping little gasps, little pants against your mouth.

He feels like a drowning man and you’re the only clean lungful of air he’s had in years.

“You’re never doing that trick again, do you hear me? It’s not funny, I don’t want Henry thinking it’s funny. You need stitches, we need to get you stitches.” You’re not angry, which he’s grateful for.

You’re worried, which kills him. He almost wishes you were angry instead of worried.

“We’ll go in the morning, after he goes to school, for now I just,” He trembles, shakes shakes shakes, “I want to be close to you, I need that (Y/N), I need to be close to you.”

He’s begging, he knows he is. Hands clasped before you he pleads for comfort, comfort he aches for.

The cooling balm of your love is his savior, and when you lean back only far enough to strip yourself out of your own clothes, when you come back towards him with open arms that you encourage him to throw himself into, he could scream shout sob with relief.

“You’ve got me, I’m here, I’m all yours.” You whisper, holding him close close close to your chest.

“Are you? Are you mine?” He whispers back, terrified, so terrified that this is all just a dream, that he’s still on the floor of his tiny fucking apartment in Los Angeles, bleeding out on the floor.

“I am, I promise Charlie, I am.” But you’re really real, and you’re really combing your fingers through his hair, and his heart is really racing even as you’re trying to calm him down. “You’re okay honey, it’s okay.”

He wrangles out of your grip, and you frown, brow creasing as he maneuvers the two of you so your positions are reversed, so he can press you into the mattress and prop himself on top of you. You are so beautiful, in the moonlight, the glow of the streetlamps washing over you, some ethereal thing.

He can’t help but litter your body with praise, adoration leaking from his fingertips. He can’t help it, not when you deserve it so, when you are the most deserving of it at all. He is reverent in the way he caresses your body, hands skimming the softness of your flesh, lips trailing after it as he presses kisses into your skin.

“Thank you, for being here, for being with me.” He is so grateful, so completely grateful for you, “Thank you, I don’t – I don’t know how I’d do this without you.”

He rests his head on your stomach and just stays there for a while, just stays there while he kisses your sides, before moving further down your body and opening your hips up, pressing your legs down flat onto the mattress on either side of his head.

“You don’t have to do it without me, I’m right here.” You sigh as he sucks marks onto your hips, fingers bruising the meat of your thighs with ease, not even realizing how tight of a grip he’s got on you.

You are the only good thing he’s had in so long, the only thing in this fucked up divorce that he knows he can count on, the only thing that he knows for sure who wants him.

He’s not even sure if Henry wants him.

“She’s winning.” Charlie says softly, on the verge of screaming. He wants to scream, but instead he focuses that energy into you, into your body, his fingers slipping between your legs and pushing into you, making your toes curl into the sheets. “She’s winning, (Y/N). She’s going to win and fucking take him away. This will be the last time he’s here. His first and last.”

“No she won’t.” You gasp as he shoves his nose into the crease where your thigh meets your pussy, how beautiful it is just for him, how it throbs. He wonders if you’ve been just as sick about it, about the distance, about missing him, as he has missed you.

“How do you know?” He asks, hopes, wants to know, wants some sort of answer that he knows you can’t give, not really. You can’t predict the future, you can’t sway the judge.

“I just do.” You say, and your back arches when he fingers you harder, when he draws out a moan, a real proper moan, from deep inside your cunt. Your hand comes down to tangle in his hair, and the sting of your pull is so good against his scalp, and you ask, “Have I ever been wrong before?”

“No – ” He shakes his head, kisses your body, kisses everywhere he can reach.

“Exactly.” You whisper, as he tries so hard to get as close to you as possible, as he tries to make up for the lost time, all that time of him being away, being across the country with a wife who doesn’t want him. He tries to express how much he adores you through the press of his fingers on your body, tries to express his gratitude as you beckon him up up up, asking, “Give me a kiss? My lips are lonely.”

“They are?” His eyes soften, and he aches for you, as he comes to your call, as he removes his fingers from the wet heat between your legs and smears your own slick across your cheek as he kisses you.

“They are, I get lonely when you’re gone.” You admit, and he’s so relieved in a sick sort of way, so pleased that you missed him too, that you thought about him too, thought about him from three thousand miles away.

“Come with me next time, to Los Angeles.” He says, more of an order than an ask, more of a demand than a plea. He kicks himself mentally for that, for being controlling, Nicole left him because he’s controlling, he can’t make that same mistake with you, so as he cups your cheeks in the moonlight he searches your eyes and adds, “Please?”

But you, you you you.

You just smile and nod and kiss him, when you say, “Yes.”

“Will you stay?” He murmurs against your lips, and you’re putty in his hands, you’re too tired to object, not that you want to.

“Yeah, we can come up with something to tell him.” You whisper, rubbing your nose against his, as your heart beats next to his.

“Once all this is over, I swear to you there’s gonna be no more hiding.” He cards a hand through your hair. “No more sneaking around, not ever again.”

“You’re worth the wait, you know?” You say, and there you go again, shattering his whole world, his whole perception of life, with those words. “You have to know that.”

He doesn’t, not really. Maybe he does. The selfish part of him does.

He doesn’t feel selfish around you.

Maybe that’s the most selfish thing.

“I love you.” He says, because it’s all he knows how to say right now, all he knows that’s true.

“I love you too.” You smile back at him, before having to clear your throat a little. “I’m thirsty, want something to drink from the kitchen? The fridge is the fancy kind, has the filter right in the door.”

“Yeah, better have some.” He nods, not wanting to let you go.

He does anyway, because nothing’s about what he wants anymore.

“I’ll be right back.” You kiss his cheek, and put your clothes back on.

You have a spare change of clothes in the dresser from when you spent the nights there getting the place ready, but there’s no sense in putting on a brand new outfit to go downstairs. Charlie watches you leave the bedroom, and just because he can, just because he’s missed you so much, he pulls on some pajama bottoms and creeps to the edge of the stairs.

“(Y/N)?” He hears Henry’s sleepy voice upon your arrival.

Charlie winces, heart racing.

“Hey Henry, what are you doing awake?” You say softly, keeping your composure, trying to appear as casual as possible.

“I can’t sleep, my body’s still on LA time.” Henry sighs, and Charlie feels awful, maybe he should have read him a bedtime story or something before having a nervous breakdown in the bathroom. But then Henry asks, “How come you’re here?”

And he freezes, ears trained to know what you say so he knows how to verify it in the morning.

“Your dad forgot something in the car so I came back over.” You lie easily. But is it a lie? He forgot his heart, in the passenger seat of your car. You only returned to put it back into his chest. You’re opening up the cabinets, Charlie can hear it when you say, “I know what’ll help, how does a mug of hot tea sound?”

“Will you make it with lemon and honey like you used to?” Henry asks, and there’s that reminder again, of the six months where you and Charlie scrambled, tried your damnedest to preserve what was left of this family.

Henry had used that word, hadn’t he? Family.

“You bet, and two cubes of sugar.” You say, rustling around with something, probably the box of sugar.  

“(Y/N)?” Henry asks again, his voice so small, and Charlie holds his breath.  

“Yeah?” You ask right back, setting the kettle to boil.

“I’m glad you’re here.” Henry says.

“I’m glad I’m here too.” You reply, “I missed you kiddo, both of you.”

He can’t see, but maybe you’re hugging.

He can’t see, but maybe you’re smiling at each other.

He can’t see, but maybe everything will be okay.

Maybe it’ll all be okay.

 Lately I seem to walk as though I had wings

Bump into things like someone in love

Each time I look at you

I'm limp as a glove

And feeling like someone in love

Feeling like someone in love

In love

                                              ------------------------

Tagging some pals!  @steeevienicks @heldcaptivebychaos  @solotriplets @formerly-anonhamster @lookinsidemyhead @candycanes19 @adamsnacc-kler  @whiskey-bumblebee @magikevalynn @tinyplanet-explorers @chelsjnov @romancedeldiablo @helloimindelaware @elfieboxcat @laurenshit @autumnlovesadam @peterisparker  @goodboybensolo  @the-marvelatic @miasera @emily-strange @proxyfoxy @disaster-rose @hazydespair @yosoymuyloca @1-800-choke-that-snoke @ktellmeastory @anongirl007 @zimmerxman @okk--maaan @flapjacques @aweirdlookingtree @callmemania-pls @theold-ultraviolence​ @og-selene​ @pinkmoontribe-blog​ @schopenhauerdeathsquad​

[rora-s]

The Derivative Chapter 12: Tests

Chapter 1 <- Chapter 11

I let off a breath closing one text book I’d finished and moving to the next. “You know there’s a difference between learning and memorizing right?” Amita pointed out with a scoff glancing at me over top her laptop screen. 

“I am aware. One is knowing the other is understanding but for me they can understandably get intermingled” I explained as I began to go through the next book. 

Amita nodded “you’re really stressing about this test you have to do for school huh?” 

“Well it is kinda a big deal. The whole prospect of my graduating early is riding on it. That and me getting accepted into college” I explained. 

“Oh really what are you looking to study?” Amita inquired. 

“Mathematics like my uncle probably, maybe something a bit more hands on to” I explained. 

“You know combinatorics is a great field” she offered. 

I scoffed “if you don’t say so yourself” 

We both giggled “seriously though you should look at applying for CalSci. You could stay local. They have a history of accepting young brilliant minds and programs especially made for those who have spotty school records.” 

“You know Larry was saying something similar before” I voiced “maybe I will think about it.” 

“Plus I’ve been considering staying at CalSci longer to get my second PhD in physics so you’d have another friendly face on campus other than Charlie and Larry” 

“Seriously?” I thought about hanging around CalSci with the brainiac trio. “That sounds really cool”

“I think it’d be cool too and we could take you on a tour of the campus sometime even, you know, show you around” Amita offered. 

I smiled “yeah that’d be great” 

Just then my friend's phone went off and she answered it “hello? … yeah sure I’ll be right there.” she hung up and started packing her things. “Charlie needs my help for a case with Don.” she informed. 

“I can come-” 

“He said specifically not to bring you even if you asked. Sorry” Amita told me sympathetically. 

“Ugh eighteen can not come soon enough” I groaned. 

“There, there” Amita murmured teasingly, patting me on the shoulder as she headed out of the house. 

______________________________

“You know when you offered to take me on a campus tour I thought I’d see more than the computer lab” I voiced as the trio finished retesting their flight route math for a third time in the CalSci computer lab. 

“I’m sorry but this is very important for the case Don’s working on” Charlie breathed out then thought for a minute “by the way I would appreciate you not telling him I allowed you to help with this math” 

“Don’t worry Uncle C, unlike some people I can keep a secret” I muttered. The man shot me a look but let the subject go as we all mulled over what we might have missed. 

“I don’t get it,” Uncle Charlie declared finally from his seat on the table behind where Amita was working. “The aircraft should have originated from an airfield that the FBI checked out” 

“Maybe they didn’t use an airfield” I suggested from where I sat next to the computer. “Like a highway or something” 

“Well then there would have been witnesses” Amita pointed out to the contrary. 

“You know, here’s where I get reductive on your ass,” Larry spoke up standing “cause you keep saying aircraft but so far no one’s been able to identify whatever it was that people saw.” 

“What are you saying, Larry?” Amita questioned. 

“I’m saying instead of building a flight path, let’s try focusing on the object itself,” Larry suggested. 

“You know what?” Charlie spoke up, hopping off his table “he’s right.” 

“Wait, you're agree that it could be a UFO?” I inquired of my uncle. 

“No, but focusing on the craft might yield better results.” The man explained coming over “We could get a visual of the object by building in all the radar sources at the same time, yes, civilian and military.” 

“So overlap the radar sources?” Amita clarified as she began to type into the computer. 

“That’s right” Charlie confirmed “by layering the images we could build a three dimensional cross section of it” 

Amita typed on the computer for a moment and we all leaned in to see “there” she finally declared “now it’s working off of all seven radar sources.” 

“And it’s building an image of the object,” Larry added. 

We watched as slowly an image began to appear. What we saw looked surprisingly Sci-fi. “Charlie? Is that what I think it is?” Amita inquired. 

“Larry I’m sorry I doubted you” I muttered. 

“Now, le-let’s be very, very careful” Charlie stammered “we shouldn’t jump to any conclusions or make any assumptions. There could be any number of reasons why that looks like-” 

“A vehicle from another part of the universe” Larry finished Charlie’s statement. 

___________

3rd POV.

“Hey Charlie” Don greeted his brother knocking on the door to the office space the professor was using in the library. 

“Hey” the young brother replied, writing on a piece of paper. 

“What’s up?”  

“Just grading tests for my Nonlinear Dynamics class.” Charlie informed. 

“Glad to see you’re taking my advice and having some fun” Don commented. 

“Well, you don’t look like you’ve been having too much fun” the younger brother pointed out, eyeing his brother as Don sat down. 

Don sighed “aw man this Gosnell case. Not to mention Abby has to take that test today in school to see if she can get out early.” 

“I’m sure she’ll pass” Charlie reassured “and you know Amita’s already talked her into applying for CalSci” 

“Yeah I’m just stressed on her behalf I guess” the older brother explained “and anyway with this case I just had to tell a guy that his dad died” Don let off another breath slouching in his seat. 

Charlie put down his pencil and turned to give his brother more of his attention “I spent all that time trying to figure out where the plane went. Turns out the pilot didn’t even know, because the rudder was busted.” 

“See, that’s the thing” Don explained “I got to find out where he was headed, ‘cause I think that’s why he was killed. You got any ideas? Anything at all?” 

Charlie sighed packing up his papers and standing “maybe. Could I, uh could I get some data off the flight recorder?” 

“Yeah, I mean, I can see if, uh, Erica can drop some by.” Don offered. “Maybe Amita can help you out” A small smile came to Charlie’s face at the suggestion and Don couldn’t help the knowing grin that came to his face. “Dad said she’s sticking around.” 

“Did he?” Charlie asked, turning to his brother. 

“Well, you happy about that?” Don inquired. 

“Um, are you asking me as her thesis advisor or..?” Charlie ended with a slight chuckle. 

Don scoffed at the blush forming on his younger brother’s features “you tell me” 

“Yeah, I’m happy,” Charlie admitted. 

They were quiet for a moment then another thought occured to Don “hey, what’s the deal I thought you were playing golf today.” 

“Oh no.” Charlie quickly replied “you know, I’m really no use on the golf course.” 

Don sat up as his brother took the seat across from him again “Charlie you know why he likes playing with you, don’t you?” 

“I have no idea” Charlie voiced “because I-I’ve got to be the worst golfer in the history of the game” 

Don shook his head surprised that his genius of a little brother could be so clueless sometimes “No. it’s the one time he gets to teach you something. You understand?” he explained “I mean I’m learning for myself that it’s not easy raising a genius. That’s his one time” Don wasn’t sure Charlie got what he was saying but just then his phone went off “oh excuse me” he stood up to take the call. “Eppes” 

“Don” David’s voice answered “the forensic report from Gosnell’s workshop just came in. We found David Croft’s fingerprints all over the shop.” 

“But I thought you said he hadn’t seen him in years” Don questioned confused. 

“And so he said” David replied 

“All right, look, uh, take a team, pick him up” Don instructed, rubbing his forehead and the bridge of his nose with his hand “I’ll meet you at the office, okay?” 

“You got it,” David agreed before hanging up. 

Don pocketed his phone again “alright kid I got to go. See you later” he called to Charlie who nodded his farewell before Don was out the door. 

_________

“I pass the dang test and as a reward I get to come out here and watch you all golf in this heat” Abby complained “that’s so not fair” 

“Ah come on kid a little exercise never hurt anybody” Don objected “maybe you could try it out for yourself” 

“No thank you” the teenager replied edgily heading toward the bench with her backpack full of reading material. 

“Where’s Chuck?” Don asked, realizing his younger brother was not in sight. 

“I don’t know last I looked, he was right behind us.” Alan replied looking around. “Oh there he is” he voiced when they spotted the younger man coming up to the bench at another angle. 

“Hey dad,” Charlie called, dragging his clubs up the incline. “Your clubs weigh a ton” 

“Are you kidding, I've used those clubs for ten years” Alan replied looking in his own golf bag as Abby made herself comfortable on the bench. “There’s nothing wrong with them” 

“Dad, they’re older than he is,” Don pointed out, going over to look in Charlie’s bag. “I don’t even think they make wood clubs anymore.”

“Yeah I know” Alan said “but each one of ‘em’s got a great sweet spot.” 

“Put ‘em in a museum,” Don commented. 

“Eh, when Charlie gets better, I’ll buy him a set of his own” Alan offered. 

“Well isn’t that encouraging” Abby muttered already part way through the novel on her lap. 

“Come on, Charlie, maybe this is the day you’ll par a hole.” Alan suggested. 

“I’d just like to get the ball in the hole. That’s all” Charlie stated as Don came over to sit next to his daughter on the bench. 

“So you passed the test” Don spoke to his kid as Alan talked to his. “What’s next?” 

“I wait and hope CalSci accepts me,” Abby declared looking up from her book. “But who knows if that’s going to happen.” 

“Well aren’t you pessimistic” Don muttered. 

“Well Donald I had to get it from somewhere” Abby replied with a smirk. 

“Yeah your mother” Don stated with a slight grin. 

“Funny she said the same thing about you” Abby advised and the pair shared a laugh as Charlie came over to join them. 

“Alright Alan show us how it’s done” Don called to his father and the three watched as the eldest among them swung the golf club. 

Chapter 13 ->

[roswelldetails]

RNM 2x10 - American Woman

EPISODE SUMMARY:

SECRETS OF THE PAST — After uncovering a cryptic message from the past, Alex (Tyler Blackburn), Isobel (Lily Cowles), Max (Nathan Dean), Michael (Michael Vlamis) and Maria (Heather Hemmens) set out in search of answers at the reservation where Alex’s mother grew up. Meanwhile, Cameron (guest star Riley Voelkel) encourages Liz (Jeanine Mason) to reach out to someone from her past after Auturo (guest star Carlos Compean) gets detained. Marcus Stokes directed the episode written by Rick Montano & Vincent Ingaro & Jason Gavin (#210). Original airdate 5/18/2020. 

DETAILS:

Tripp brings Louise to the Reservation in a body bag where the Navajo doctors are able to save her life.

"Your message said that you were gonna bring two women that would be no trouble.  This looks like a lot of trouble."

"I must have gotten the codes wrong."

"No, don't give me that Manes man nonsense. Not here in my own home."

"Her name is Louise. I promised her friend Nora I'd protect them. My brother triggered an ambush before I could get them here. And Nora…"

"Wait, what does the Air Force want them for?"

"They're not from around here. They're from...up north."

"Yìiyáh. No. She can't stay here… What if your brother comes here and finds a fugitive.  I can't put my people at risk for a white woman."

"Please. You're the only person I trust. If she doesn't make it, it was all for nothing."

"I'll have you remember that I was the one that saved your ass in Okinawa. I don't owe you anything. I'm only doing this because you're my family. And because I'm a damn fool."

A few notes on this scene:

--I don't know why Tripp pretends he got the codes wrong.  Unless he's spiraling and talking about the timing of the attack.  But it seems like he means the message that he was bringing them to the reservation.  Clearly things didn't go according to plan.  Though, it is always possible that we're still missing bits of the story.

--OG Easter Egg.  "They're not from around here.  They're from up north." For anyone who didn't watch OG, this is almost exactly how the exchange went when Max told Liz he was an alien in the 1999 pilot.

--Yìiyáh - I found nothing on this word.  I'm assuming that it's a curse word or general exclamation of negativity, but literally got zero results on google. It's possible, of course, that it's misspelled in the captions.  There were a lot of errors in the captions in this opening scene.

--While there really isn't any overt statement that Alex is half Navajo and this town is part of Navajo Nation (which has been in the news a lot lately and therefore is a good place in this country to be aware of), there's lots of clues or subtle enough statements that I feel like it can be accepted as fact, since: Harrison is a codetalker, the necklace is Navajo, tsela is a Navajo word. So I did a little peeking and it could work.  The closest Navajo town is about a 4 hour drive from Roswell.

Navajo Nation: 

(side note - Navajo Nation has extreme poverty but also is utterly gorgeous. And the Tribe gets income from tourism. Just a few places there that I'm dying to go? Monument Valley, Antelope Canyon, Shiprock.  Check it out.)

Liz comments on Max's irregular heartbeat, with literally no acknowledgment of the fact that she's straddling him and has a history of causing his heart to race...and other forms of lack of control (think 1x03).

"I'm excited about this though. You know Alex dug up all that info on our bio Mom. You sure you can't come?"

"Got to take my dad in for his blood tests. I want to check on Jenna too.  Cannot believe she's back in the hospital again."

"She's been in pain for weeks. I have no leads on the mysterious hunting van, and Charlie hasn't made contact."

"Hmm. To be fair, I do hear that phone service is a little spotty in flying saucers."

"Okay, I get that. You think my alien abduction theory is bogus."

"I know you're worried that this has something to do with you, but I don't think this is an alien thing."

"Cam and I had fractal burns on our necks. We had no memory of what happened. That's alien stuff. I just want clarity on something."

--Note that it's past time to abandon all hope of anything resembling a defined timeline for this show...once again we have weeks passing between episodes. This is the second time this season that the time passing has only been generically described as "weeks".  It's been at least a year since Liz came back to Roswell (per her conversation with Diego), but a year would be summer (late May or early June, specifically), and in this episode Isobel mentions that it's winter (which would be a year and a half).

Maria's pitch:

"In conclusion, esteemed members of the Roswell Tourism Board, while the Pony is normally a sanctuary for locals during CrashCon, I think that my plan to turn it into the Contact Cantina Pop-Up Bar will be a hit with alien fans."

"We're talking more money than we first speculated, aren't we now?"

"You know, Mayor Bernhardt, I forgot to tell you about our new morning cocktail… It's coffee, vanilla cream, and our best bourbon. Let me get you a double."

Note: so this is the famous Mayor Bernhardt. Funded by the Long family. Doesn't like immigrants. Had a racist relative who wouldn't give first prize to the black man.

Maria's vision…

Herself, younger, sitting at the Pony bar. 

"You have to let me go! You're just crazy! And I'm trapped!"

And then she runs from the bar crying.

She's not wearing the necklace.

Describing it to Michael:

"I had a vision, but it was more like a memory. Of a fight I had with my mom when I was younger."

Isobel interrupts Michael and Maria to pick them up for the road trip. Just a few relevant excepts from this scene:

"Pack your bags. We're going on a family road trip."

"Is this why Max wanted the day off?"

"In the photo of Max and Isobel's bio Mom, there was a water tower. Alex recognized that water tower from the town where his mom grew up. You should come with us."

Alex and Forrest talk in the Crashdown:

"Hope that limp isn't from a paintball injury."

"Nope. Those bruises have mostly healed. I just got a new prosthetic. Takes a minute to get used to. You working on your book?"

"I write my book on my computer.  However, I write my angsty emo poetry in an angsty emo journal."

"I'm actually working on some poetry myself. Well, song lyrics, technically. It's a lot harder than it was in high school."

"Yeah, writing was easier for me when I was a kid too. Feelings...we bury 'em now. You just got to find that thing inside of you that doesn't have a voice. Lend it yours. You know? Listen, I have like, zero musical talent, but if you need help with the worst part, we could, uh…"

"Actually I'm leaving tomorrow for a few days to go talk to some recruits."

Michael interruptus, and the conversation goes casual.

--What happened to "angsty nerd isn't really my type." Or...was it FORESHADOWING!!!?! 😂

--Oh hi there clear shot of Forrest's clearly Deep Sky logoed ring…

Cam has been having debilitating migraines that have been keeping her bedridden since the abduction.

Nurse Kate is a badass. she tries to keep ICE from getting into a patient's room. Liz hears her and hurries to the waiting room, where there's more ICE activity. Liz panics and tries to get Arturo out of the hospital, but she caught the attention of the ICE officers. However, Liz knows her rights.

"He has applied for his green card. I'm his sponsor, okay? This is his G-1145 right here."

"You can show that to the court."

"It's okay. Call the lawyer."

"No. He is a diabetic. It is illegal to detain a patient."

"Exigent circumstances. Move."

"No. Hey, this is an unconstitutional arrest and the ACLU will be all over you."

"Elizabeth, we respect the law in this family. If you're in trouble, who will take care of the mouse?"

--G-1145 is a request for confirmation that your green card application has been accepted:

--The timing of this all. Liz has been prepared for this moment all her life and would fight it to the point of getting arrested herself, if not for Rosa. Rosa's safety is the only thing that convinces Liz to step aside.

--As an only semi related note, this is a really interesting contrast to how they wrote Jeanine's character out on Grey's Anatomy.  

--Also feel like it would be remiss of me to not point out Liz's reactiveness and fightinf mentality is mirroring how Liz initially reacted to Max pulling her over in the pilot.

"Okay. So the Deputy on call says there's one detention center in the county. Here's the info."

"He doesn't have anything left in Mexico. No one. Nowhere to go."

"You can't think like that right now."

"I think like this always. Rosa and I used to recite our escape plan for if our parents got deported and we got separated in foster care. I begged my parents not to tell Santa where we lived because I was afraid he'd ask for papers. My whole life was built on a fear of this day coming, and it's here. If I'd have kept better track of his health, he wouldn't need these tests. I should have made him move to California. I thought we were safe being outside the hundred-mile zone, but after this election I should have known better. And I should have made him wear a sweater this morning because it's freezing out there. And what if he…?"

"...okay think. Is there someone we can call?"

"Kyle's at a conference, but I can have him call his mom."

"Do you know anyone with some real power? You know, Federal muscle?"

Cam gets dressed to take Liz to the Detention Center and Liz calls Diego for help.

The road trip group arrive at the reservation and meet Gregory Manes.  He says he remembers them all from high school.  He takes Max, Michael, and Isobel to learn about Louise while Alex and Maria go jewelry shopping.

Meanwhile Gregory is taking the Pod Squad to Louise's grave, but pauses for some flirting:

"You're still the Isobel Evans who convinced the basketball captain to pull four different fire alarms to get out of AP Gov, right? Yeah, legend. Here she is."

"Oh my God, it's covered in flowers.  It's winter."

"Rumor is they grow year-round unattended. She was a healer. I'm told she helped with trauma, addiction, that sort of thing. All without speaking."

"This another grave?"

"She was pregnant."

"Louise arrived gravely injured. And the baby didn't survive.

--Louise died the same day the Pod Squad came out of the pods, confirming that she is probably the old woman on the reservation that was described in 1x09.

--Michael found the mysterious purple flowers growing on Louise's grave.

Alex and Maria at the trading post.

"Are you okay? Seem a little off."

"I had a vision during a meeting this morning. It almost cost me a deal that could save the bar. Maybe I should just wear the necklace. Go back to being a social media guru. Slash barkeep. Slash magical trope in our redneck mayor's fantasy."

"So why did you really come today? Your ideal day off isn't fighting for the radio silence with Isobel Evans, so…"

"This is the back of my necklace. The word stamped in the silver says Tsela. The necklace is Navajo, so I thought maybe that was the jeweler, but no one I've asked here seems to know who made it. I just want answers."

"Well, there's a ton of silver jewelry for sale here. So why don't we just keep looking for something with the same stamp?"

Pod Squad sharing a bottle of acetone by Louise's grave.

"Noah said our planet was war-torn. But the hell they found here can't have been worth it."

"Do you think that Louise's baby died from her injuries or do you think maybe it was never going to survive?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I was pregnant. When you died. Obviously I'm not anymore. I just can't help wondering if that was my last chance. Assuming that humans and aliens can't procreate because they're different species. Maybe that little baby wasn't viable."

"You almost died during the abortion, didn't you? I could feel it. Noah almost killed you again, huh? Oh, I need a minute."

After Max leaves Michael offers to be a sperm donor for Isobel if she ever wants to have a kid.

Liz at the Detainment Center

"It's Ortecho. Arturo Ortecho. He's my dad. And he needs gliclazide and beta-blockers. I brought both."

"We can't take contraband here, but there is an infirmary on-site, if he's here."

"You know, out of curiosity, did Nebane Abienwi visit an infirmary before he died of a brain bleed in your custody? What about Johana Medina León? She was 25 years old, okay? People walk through those doors and they die...Who's your supervisor? You need prior approval before conducting enforcement in a hospital. There was a compliance memo."

"Right, a memo, which is just like a law only not. Unless you calm down, I'm gonna arrest you for obstruction."

"Okay, Liz, maybe sit down.  Sir, I'm Deputy Jenna Cameron, and we appreciate your interpretation of your guidelines, but we have an urgent health concern about an inmate here, if you just wouldn't mind checking the system."

Jenna goes with the agent…when she returns...

"Do you have a court case next week for a vandalism charge?"

"What? Yes, but I didn't do it. I'm just gonna plead guilty and pay the fine. It's nothing."

"They denied your dad's green card application because of a misdemeanor on your record. You can't be his sponsor."

Jenna's headaches overtake her. Meanwhile, the ICE agent comes back with news:

"Here just came up. Ortecho is being transferred to El Paso for his deportation hearing. You can see him there around Tuesday."

--Liz's misdemeanor is taking the fall for Rosa's vandalism from when she was arrested by Sheriff Valenti in 2x02.

Gregory takes the Pod Squad to see Harrison who is on his death bed.  Manes boys are always welcome here, the woman tells them. Harrison is the only one Louise ever spoke to on the reservation.

"He met my great uncle Tripp Manes fighting in WWII.  Harry was a code talker."

Michael gets Gregory to leave with him so that Max and Isobel can go inside of Harrison's head. Their conversation:

"You look like her."

"Harrison.  You look different."

"That was a lesson I learned from Louise. How to take your mind to a better time when you're in pain. Come on. I haven't seen the sky in a while. I'll tell you about her...I taught Tripp the codes in the Pacific. That's how we set up the rescue. He was supposed to snuggle Louise and Nora here, but the plan fell apart."

In the past between Harrison and Tripp:

"You've changed. The man I met on that ship obeyed orders."

"Guess I saw what happens when good men fall in line with bad orders. I'm a Christian, Harry. When evil itself tells me to kill a woman with child, I disobey. Even if the evil looks just like my brother."

A nurse rolls Louise into the room in a wheelchair.

"Did you find a family for her?"

"There should be music where you take her. I think she's a dancer."

"You can give her a house full of music, Louise. Nora wanted me to protect you so that you could protect the child."

"No. He's coming for me and I can't even move. No. When the devil comes, I won't be able to fight for her. Please. It is hard to be a woman on your planet.  It's only gonna be harder still for her. Roy Bronson believed in meeting hatred with compassion. And I want her to be like him. A light in the darkness. A little star on the ground. I want that for both my girls."

"Where did he take the baby?"

"Can't say."

"No. Tell us where our sister went."

"She isn't your sister. Louise rarely spoke, but when she did, she spoke of two daughters. Two stars on the ground. She had no sons. You aren't hers. You came from something else...She lived for decades longer than she should have, trapped inside of a body that could no longer dance, waiting for a sign that you would be all right. She loved you."

Jenna wakes up back at the hospital.

"I asked them to run a new test. Your headaches are spinal headaches. Because there was a hole torn into your spinal cord."

"I'm sorry, what? My kidnappers gave me a spinal tap?"

"Do you mind signing off so I can look at your tox screen?"

"Yeah, of course, but, Liz, you don't have to do this, okay? Your dad, and…"

"I need a distraction. I can't leave for El Paso until tomorrow, and they're not letting him have visitors other than his lawyer until Tuesday, so...thank you for being here. You used your privilege to help me. I'm furious that I needed it, but I needed it."

--Reposado is a type of tequila

--Spinal Headaches:

Isobel and Max on what they learned from Harrison:

"You've always been different than me and Michael, okay? Always. You were the leader. From the start. I mean, you're the special one. You're the healer."

"I was. Now I can't even sneeze without my heart skipping a beat. All my life, no matter how weird things got, I never felt alone. Because I was your twin. Maybe I'm different. Maybe I'm a freak...I can't stop thinking about being chained up when I was a kid. It didn't feel like someone bad chained me up. It felt like I was the someone bad."

"Max, you're not dangerous."

"Saving people destroys me. But killing Noah? That felt good. I was high. And whenever I think about what he did to you, I want to chase that high. I wish I could kill him a thousand times. Louise mentioned the devil. Maybe something evil was chasing them. And maybe that something was me."

"Okay. I want to show you something. You see this hand on her shoulder there? See, Michael thought it was just someone who got cropped out of the photo, but no. Any female would recognize that body language. She does not want that hand on her. Louise said the devil would come. I think something evil was after them, but it wasn't you. I want to find out who it was."

Alex and Gregory:

"Hey, I just wanted to say thank you before we go. I also feel like I should congratulate you on getting out."

"Of the Navy?"

"Of the family. Getting out from under Dad."

"You got to break free of him, man."

"Do you feel free?"

"I don't think I get to be free until you are, Alex. You know, you're my brother. I wish that I would've stood up for you more."

"You know, I think he's actually getting a little bit better. It's like the stroke melted away the psycho in his brain or something." 

"If you can forgive him you should. Cast off the stone. Let me hate him for you. I owe you that much."

Back at the trading post with the whole road trip group.

"We scoured the store for jewelry that said Tsela on it, but nada. Although I did manage to spend an entire week's worth of tips anyway."

"Tsela?"

"Yeah it was printed on the back of my grandmother's necklace. I thought I might find some answers here."

"Well, apparently, it is Navajo for star on the ground. So, you guys ready to go?"

"Star on the ground.  Maria? What year was your grandmother born?"

"Uh, '48, I think?"

"Was she adopted?"

"Yeah. Oh my God."

"Your grandmother was my sister."

Note: The direct translation of Tsela is stars lying down. Interestingly, it's often a name in Navajo. When I googled it, the top results were names for Navajo boys.

Diego and Liz's conversation:

"Diego, I never would have reached out if it weren't an emergency. Thank your mom for me."

"The Senator was more than happy to call in a favor. She's always liked you."

"I like her too. We need more people like her."

"Look, we got lucky your dad got out at all, much less without an ankle monitor. And you pissed a few people off back there, so it's not likely that this is the end for you. Who's your lawyer? Or should I make some calls?"

"No, you've done enough. After what I did, I can't even believe you listened to my voicemail...How did you get here so fast?"

"I was at the airport in Phoenix when you called. Just had to reroute real fast."

"And how have you been?"

"Well, my fiancée left me. I'm kidding. No, I'm seeing someone.  It's getting pretty serious, so…"

"Good. Me too."

"Good. We can be friends...And don't take this the wrong way. Please tell me you're not wasting that incredible brain of yours writing alien hamburger puns."

"I am working on a few projects. Nothing I can talk about, but, I'm not wasting anything."

"Well, all the coolest studies make you sign NDAs anyway, so…"

"You know what? There actually is something...Do you know what butyricol is?  Worth a shot. It's this chemical I found in my friend's tox screen. I had never heard of it."

"Maybe you're slacking, Ortecho."

"I am sorry, it has only been a year. Did you literally forget everything about me?"

Note: I'm very pleased to say that when I googled butyricol, half of the top results were RNM related.  Definitely not a real drug.

Malex fight in the bunker:

"We're closed!"

"Hey, that alien console piece that Jim Valenti left me...You still have it?"

"No. I sold it on eBay."

"You didn't attach it to your console."

"I tried. Doesn't fit."

"So, Tripp left this for my dad before he died. My dad thought it was a code, but this is a reference sketch of this exact piece. My dad's been looking for this thing for 30 years and Jim Valenti had it all along...I'm gonna give it to him. I want to see what he does with it once he's got it. Look, if it didn't fit in your console, then it fits somewhere else. My dad could lead us there.""Your dad hunts aliens, Alex. He'll lead my family right off a cliff."

"I've protected you so far. That's not changing. Besides, he's different these days...I don't trust him, Guerin. I just…I'm asking you to trust me.""When we were kids, you believed people were good, despite humanity doing everything to prove you otherwise. And, God, I loved you for it. But what was charming when we were 17, it's just stupid now. How do you not see that? You believe there's some good in your father?"

"Yeah. Yeah I do. God forbid I have faith in people who don't give me a good reason to."

"That's not fair."

"No? Why is your hand covered? You miss your injury because you want to hurt. Your anger made you feel safe. I will always hate my father for what he did to you, but I don't want to live in that toolshed for the rest of my life. I don't want to walk around thinking that people don't change, that one day everyone's just gonna let me down, 'cause I am not building a damn rocket ship in a hidden lair. There's one way for me off this planet. And I need to believe in a reason to stay. I promise I'll keep you safe."

"Can't let you leave with that."

"What are you gonna do? Fight me for it?"

And then Alex leaves and is kidnapped. Hit over the head by an unknown assailant. The note from Tripp blows away.

Max and Liz are talking back at Max's house while Max drinks a lot of bourbon.

"You know, you never told me why your parents immigrated here in the first place."

"My dad wanted a family, but not in Juárez. There was no opportunity, no money. Women were disappearing there all the time. He didn't want my mom to be one of them. So he fled. You're wondering why your family came here."

"If I even had a family. I know so little about my own story. And the parts I thought I understood are just unraveling."

"Max. Family is the one area where I am certain that biology does not matter. Look, when I found out that Rosa was only my half sister that didn't change anything."

"This is different...There are only three of us on this planet, as far as we know. I mean, feeling disconnected from them makes me feel completely alone."

"Completely alone? I'm right here."

"When you needed a rescue today your Mensa society, old money son of a senator ex was there to answer your prayers. I couldn't even answer a call. You didn't need me."

"Oh my God. Okay, so would you prefer that I did need you? Would you prefer to come home to find me crying into my dad's windbreaker so that you can swoop me up and drive me to El Paso for his deportation hearing in the morning?"

"That's not fair. You wanted me to talk about today."

"Yes, okay. I'm sorry. I want you to feel better."

"Well, you think maybe you could go back in time and not meet someone as handsome as Diego? Seriously. He's like if someone mixed a cologne ad with a Kennedy. It's ridiculous. I will never feel adequate again."

"You're wrong. Max, let me be clear. You are objectively better in bed...And I never woke up on a Sunday morning to him singing Hank Williams in the shower...He never snuck unreasonable tips into my dad's checks. Or quoted Henry the Fourth. Coming home to you at the end of my worst days and my best days is the only rescue I need."

I actually found this background on the Ortechos to be fascinating.  In case you don't know Juárez is a pretty big city directly opposite the border from El Paso. It does have some huge crime issues. But it also is one of those border cities where the border is a little thinner. Like San Diego and Tijuana.  People live in Juárez and work in El Paso and vice versa.

If you want to see a really dark & gritty portrayal of Juárez, I'd highly recommend you to check out the American version of the show The Bridge.  Which literally deals with an investigation related to disappearing women.

Isobel and Maria at the Pony:

"She looks so determined."

"Yeah, neither of us would be here if she hadn't been. You know she was paralyzed 50 years and she still managed to use her powers to help ease troubled minds. You know how hard that is? To take on someone else's suffering? I mean, it doesn't just disappear. She would have been carrying all of that."

"She suffered so much loss."

"I don't know how to be worth it."

Michael on the bracelet.

"The beads are made with pollen from the alien flower. I found another plant growing at Louise's grave. Okay my working theory is that they grow from alien remains. There's this UFO lore about that Libyan desert where the flowers have been discovered before. You don't have to wear it if you don't want to. I know better than to think I can save Maria DeLuca. I hope you decide you can save yourself."

Max is still drinking after Liz went to bed.  At 4:04am Diego calls and wakes her up. 

"I made a call, about that toxin in your friend's system. Butyricol. It's a drug. It's a memory eraser. It was developed by a private organization and purchased by the military for weaponization. There's no approved application outside of violent combat."

Liz tries to call Alex, but he's too busy being unconscious in the back of his SUV.  So his kidnapper pockets his phone.

Max has a memory flash. There's fighting, weapons clashing, a woman's voice...all while he's chained down in the cave. Louise appears and kneels down to touch his shoulder.  He looks afraid, but she's trying to comfort him (even though she has blood splattered all over her white clothes). She smiles and nods and then cuts Max free of the chains with her alien weapon. She offers him her hand, but before he can take it a figure in white appears and he and Louise fight. Max cries out and hides his face.

Present day Max is visibly shook by the flash.

MUSIC:

1.  Shelly Fairchild "Worry No More"

2.  Powerslide "Just You And I"

3.  Will Fox "Against The Tide"

4.  Tommee Profitt feat. Sam Tinnesz "Bullet With Butterfly Wings"

[truthisgoldenau]

IT'S PRIDE MONTH

for a moment there I accidentally had Pierce's photo under Marian's name oop

Time to officially confirm some AU canon LGBT stuff! Each character is their own pride flag but I'll add in other stuff that's canon in universe plus some bonus stuff at the bottom.

First up is Freddy Fazbear Jr! Gay all the way.

He's definitely the "move I'm gay" type

Was honestly super freaked out to tell his dad but went with the bold approach of bringing home his first boyfriend and blatantly announcing their relationship as such as a challenge and was honestly surprised his dad wasn't bothered by it

He was around 13 at the time and so the twins and Fred were still in touch with Maddie's parents and brother. All three were incredibly supportive (and still would be)

He absolutely had a crush on Bonnie Burnette even though he had never talked to him. Since the twins and Bonnie went to the same high school he knew of Bonnie, thought he was a dreamboat, but because Bonnie was somehow in with the popular kids (it was the money 100%) Freddy didn't even bother

Frankie Fazbear! My ace son! (The ears are wrong blame the app lol)

Honestly doesn't even know he's ace until much later

He's had crushes before but he's never been in a relationship (part of it is the attempt to communicate since he's mute sort of stops him)

He wasn't even sure it was worth mentioning to his dad so Fred never knew

This boy can hold so much love in his heart but he's not a very physical person that's all

Fred Fazbear Sr! YES. HE'S BI.

Only Maddie even knew he was bi. That he knew of. Some people probably figured it out with his over the top always on personality.

Fred was constantly sure that Pierce picked up on it particularly after the Christmas mistletoe fiasco but if Pierce gave a shit he never said anything.

Frankly it was amazing that more people didn't pick up on it. He was over the top about everything until a point.

While he didn't overreact to his son very blatantly announcing he had a boyfriend, he was very proud of him. It was a very Fazbear family way to come out. Even though he got so distant, he was always proud of his boys.

Bonnie Burnette! Also bi!

Being constantly surrounded by the popular crowd and always being the sort of stand out with purple hair and stupid purple bunny ears didn't do much to make Bonnie feel like he could even tell anyone he was bi.

Really the only reason he was even in the popular crowd was he was rich.

It made him less of a target for bullies at least cause the jocks wouldn't stand for anyone messing with him.

Knew Frankie from math class and honestly wished he could have talked to the quiet kid with bear ears as an alternative to the entirety of the popular group

Sort of in the background of the AU story very quietly develops a crush on Freddy and then thinks "oh God I like the troublemaker NO"

Chandler Cicily! Lesbian!

Would absolutely describe her sexuality as "girls"

She's starting to discover it during the AU (even if it's not a topic that comes up but that's why there's this post about stuff lmao).

She's the baby of the group since she's 16 when the story starts and relationships aren't important to her yet

But the crew still support her when later she's like "maybe I just wanna bake things for a cute girl and let her put flowers in my hair is that too much to ask" (Marian always chimes in with "mood")

Marian Mengele! An absolute bi icon!

Listen, her one goal in life may be to find her lost childhood friend, but that doesn't mean she's solely interested in this one Irish redhead

That said she's definitely only dated redheads

She's not afraid to be open about her orientation. It doesn't bother her. She's seen as weird already what can it hurt.

That said she falls for Finn so goddamn fast when she finds him that she questions herself and then is like "no wait I'm definitely not straight"

She's very upfront with Finn about it. There's no reason to hide this from him (or anyone) and if they're a thing she wants him to know.

Finn being the wonderful human being still loves her and it doesn't bother him. Why should it? He's just happy to be with someone who loves him.

Chetana might be Chandler's fake big sister but Marian is like fake mama when it comes to Chandler finally coming out.

God bless Finn for being the kind of person to sit and let Marian braid his hair with flowers because that's one of Marian's favorite things to do when her partner has longer hair and Finn's never really bothered with keeping his hair short THESE TWO ARE ICONIC I love them

Pierce Graves! A shitty pansexual icon

First off he absolutely knew that Fred wasn't 100% straight he had no idea how it wasn't immediately obvious to everyone

That said Pierce literally did not give a shit who knew about his sexuality

As shitty as his whole personality was he could turn on the charm easily

His parents definitely knew but he was already a punk ass rebellious teen at the time so they have him the "be careful, don't get anyone pregnant" talk and worried from afar. If it bothered them, Pierce never knew because they made sure that he could still count on them (even though at the time Pierce didn't really talk to them much about anything)

Fred absolutely knew though I mean they were good friends

He's not a romantic. He's never really had a meaningful relationship because he's not that type of person. To be honest, there's a piece of him that saw relationships that worked and wondered how that would feel but he knew that wasn't for him. He figured that out way early on when he asked his granddad why he didn't have a grandma and Mortimer Graves didn't sugarcoat the answer. "She wasn't happy with me. I gave her the choice. She could stay and be miserable with my lack of a decent personality even though I was already struggling to not be such an ass or she could go and find someone who actually made her happy. She chose happiness, and while it sucks that she drifted out of my life and your dad's, she's better off."

Pierce could frankly always tell that he was more like his granddad and as much as he sometimes wanted to know if he could even out up with a meaningful relationship, he avoided it. Better to not hurt anyone and wonder than to become the catalyst for someone else to overcome, right?

Fritz Smith! Gay!

The shy bumbling mechanic of the early 90s Freddy's ? Gay? It's more likely than you think

He was still far in the closet in the 90s He was young, living at home still because he had just gotten out of school, and while his parents weren't super conservative, he also didn't know how they'd take it

Found a friend in the day guard Mike Schmidt early on. Mike was looking for a roommate since his last one had moved out and Fritz jumped at the chance

They are like totally boyfriends by the time they cameo in the story though

Mike Schmidt! Another gay icon!

Mostly invited Fritz to live at his apartment because he felt bad that this poor shy mechanic was getting constantly harangued about the animatronics having problems

Was glad to let Fritz complain about it and even cry it was very stressful but Fritz needed the money

Mike liked him. It would be hard not to really. Fritz was a sweetheart.

Mike didn't ask him out till much later though he wasn't quite sure that Fritz was gay and didn't want to ruin their friendship.

Luckily it didn't and as it turns out they worked well in a relationship.

Fritz's parents had to take some time to get used to it when finally Fritz got the nerve to tell them but as soon as they did there was no end of support from them

Mike's parents were the opposite which was mainly why he already lived by himself but oh well he got a cute boyfriend and cool parents-in-law later it was kind of a win

Daniel Hartford-Dunn! Gay!

Presenting Maddie's older brother!

outside universe fact, he's loosely based in my actual cousin who lives in California with his husband.

He's 7 years older than Maddie was. Despite that, they were still close. Maddie's parents wanted more kids but struggled to get the two they had.

He's an accountant for a corporation and his boyfriend (and later his husband) is a pilot.

Last time he saw his nephews in person was at Maddie's funeral. He misses them terribly but over the years less and less contact came from his brother in law

Sometime in 2006 though he ends up getting a call from his nephews and there's this great reunion.

He's just. This chill older guy. Who loves his family. And doesn't care what people think.

Since I can't put anymore photos, here's the bonus content!

-as mentioned last night Dr. Phillip Guy is on the ace spectrum. I don't have anymore details about that at the moment unfortunately.

-Charlie Emily is a lesbian. The Emily twins were born in 1980. They haven't appeared in the AU yet even as cameos but they exist. Considering in AU canon the Emily family is alive and well in Hurricane, Utah without an Afton to be found, Charlie's dating her childhood friend Jessica at around the time the AU events are happening.

-Sammy Emily is trans and bi. Both Henry and his wife (who I know I at one point named but don't remember what it is anymore) love their two daughters to pieces.

That said I'll make a post at a later point introducing the Emily family because so far I've only officially given the design for Henry and not the rest.

In line with canon, Spring Bonnie/Springtrap can be counted as gay.

While Fred kept the shows at the diner pretty simple and straightforward, there was definitely this subtle underlying idea that Spring Bonnie and Fredbear were a content gay couple although if asked it was easy to present them as friends. At least, that was during '81-'82

However!

Fred also had Henry help him program in a special one time only song called Springtime for his and Maddie's anniversary in 1983, which was of course a love song. Fred always thought of that as being mostly for his wife, and partially as a turning point thematically for the two characters.

Henry was on board with this. They still kept it subtle, but there were clear moments where it was pretty much certain that the only way to interpret Spring Bonnie and Fredbear was as a couple. It was either so subtle that no one was bothered or Spring Bonnie's chosen voice was so ambiguously non-binary that no one thought it was odd.

Fred had plans for it to become more "canon" but never got to implement them since Spring Bonnie got damaged before he could.

Springtrap, being sentient and able to later interpret his emotions, is very confused about how he as a machine was meant to feel about this character he knew but the more sentient he becomes the more aware he is that he misses Fredbear and that he loved him. It's the cause of a lot of internal conflict for him. But he can be counted in the category of LGBT characters in the AU.

Happy pride month ya'll! 🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈🏳️‍🌈

[tippitv]

Supernatural TippiTV Recap: 14-13 “Lebanon”

Okay before we get started. This is a long one and while I think it's pretty funny if I do say so myself, there's also a lot of me just... frickin ranting about John Winchester and rushed plots. If you loved this episode and don't want to see someone snarking about it, this might not be the recap for you.

On the other hand if you're like me and come from the TWoP tradition of snarking about the things we love most, then come on in!

THEN!

Two children talk about how their dad is on a hunting trip and hasn't been home in a while.

Oh wait... holy crap it's Sam and Dean. It took a sec to recognize them without the gravelly voices and almost 14 years of soul-crushing despair.

We also get a reminder of very recent episodes, including the one where Mary learns about the time John threw young Dean's food away because it reminded him of her. It's important to remember what an abusive, hardened asshole John Winchester was... so that we can forget it! Forget it all!

[insert video of recapper letting out a Klingon scream]

NOW!

Sam and Dean mosey on into a pawn shop that I'm positive is in the US because they never leave the US but there's a sign that says the shop buys "jewellery" which is how they spell it in places that also spell "flavor" with a u. Dean flashes a big wad of cash to get the broker to show them "the good stuff."

By this, he means the magical goods, although the secret room looks like a high school drama department prop closet.

Dean says they're looking for the skull of a woman who was executed during the Salem witch trials. While the broker goes looking for it, Sam picks up a teddy bear from, you know, a shelf full of cursed and magical items because it's not as if stuffed animals have ever been dangerous. <cue ironic flashback>

Luckily he's warned away from it before he can unleash some kind of... Pooh demon... probably.

Anyway, it turns out having the skull proves that the broker killed a friend of theirs or something... Honestly, very little of this is going to have any bearing on anything. Long story short, fisticuffs ensue and Dean shoots the broker while he's expositing to Sam. "They always talk too much," Dean says.

Sam and Dean decide to take a bunch of magical items home with them. Although... what if they rightfully belong to other peop---ah screw it.

Okay now... here comes a long, boring subplot about teenagers back in Lebanon, Kansas. The main thing that's pertinent to the show is that Sam and Dean have a certain reputation around town. And no wonder! They park right in front these teenagers and start talking about shit they would never want anyone to hear.

They head into the world's skimpiest liquor store and the owner addresses them as "the Campbell brothers." Say whaaaat? Have they been using their mom's maiden name for a while and I just missed it? I mean, I guess it makes sense because... Actually, I don't remember how much stuff is still in their world about the infamous Winchesters. Like I legit can't remember if Charlie or someone erased their FBI/police records or if it was just some fanon someone told me about.

Also, nothing says "real liquor store" like shelves of bottles turned so that their name brands don't show.

Anyway, Sam stage-whispers to Dean about an ancient Chinese pearl that grants "what your heart desires."

The plan is to get Michael out of his head, but they notice someone is driving off with the Impala. They run out to confront one of the teenagers about it. He confesses that a girl named Max is the culprit, so that we can spend several minutes on this subplot instead of the much more emotional and important main plot.

I mean, we go from the post office to a pizza joint to an old house on the edge of town to catch up to the Impala. Max has apparently brought all that lethal “secret” stuff inside for a party. The camera lingers on that teddy bear again as if it's going to be important to the plot later.

Max, the car thief, has a crush on a girl and ISTG I was prepared to be mad if she died. Like I don't even want this whole subplot at all but I'd be puh-hissed if they had queer characters on just to kill one. Luckily I was wrong and neither of them die. However, the dialog is killing me. "I'm sooo excited for pizza." Tell me you can't imagine Lumpy Space Princess saying that.

Apparently the ghost of John Wayne Gacy (sigh) was waiting for the kids to go in search of pizza before oozing out of a cigar box the Winchesters brought from the pawn shop.

Why is his ghost dressed as a clown? I mean yes I know Gacy was a children's party clown, but it's not like he died in that outfit. Aren't ghosts supposed to be wearing what they died in? OH GOD WHY DO I CARE.

The Winchesters show up and scoot everyone out of the house, but not before at least one kid sees the ghost. Sam zeroes in on the cigar box and Dean points out how Sam's love of serial killers and hatred of clowns are in conflict.

Of course, some of the kids come back in just as the ghost goes up in flames. Sam and Dean decide to just... tell them the whole truth instead of just lying. Like..."Yo, one of the things you stole was secret holographic tech and you could face prison time if you talk about it." See? Easy peasy. Instead, they just trust the kids to never talk about ghosts being real and meeting actual ghost hunters.

I briefly wondered if this was some kind of back door pilot for teen hunters, but I haven't heard anything about that. Granted I didn't actually look that hard.

Once back at the bunker, Sam finds the magic pearl but it's kinda... chalky and medicinal looking. It looks like something Goop would sell to stick up your hoohaw.

Dean decides there's no time to wait because we've already spent too long on teenagers playing hooky. Like, even Sam doesn't really know how to use it. "I guess you just concentrate on what your heart desires," he says, scrunching his face uncertainly. I mean what if this had happened

The music swells dramatically. The lights flicker off dramatically. A shadowy figure approaches... dramatically. Fisticuffs ensue! It's a nice callback to Dean and Sam fighting in the dark in the pilot episode because ta da! It's actually John Winchester! Which we all knew because this was foretold in promotions.

The lights come up, showing... just a whole lot of things for me to process.

Now, at first, things don't seem that weird. We've seen people come back from the dead so many times, it's basically as surprising as buying socks at this point. Except! John isn't back from the dead at all! He's traveled through time! He eventually tells us he's from the year TWO THOUSAND AND THREE. TWO ZERO ZERO THREE.

He's both three years younger than the last time the bros saw him AND 13 years older, because for Jeffrey Dean Morgan, and all the rest of us mortals, time has marched on. Consequently, John Winchester looks like he got stuck in a wormhole for a good while.

Now, kudos to John for recognizing his sons, especially Sam, who looked a little something like this the last time they saw each other.

"Aren't you supposed to be in Palo Alto?" he asks Sam. "And also not a middle-aged man?" he doesn't ask, but I bet he was thinkin' it.

It's just... sigh. I might as well get it all out now. I get what they were going for here. It's the 300th episode and they wanted to have John show up. But because everything is so rushed, they just gloss over anything remotely realistic to the characters. John is all softness and awe the instant the lights go up, instead of bristling and suspicious. Why wouldn't he think it was a djinn or some other creature's doing? "Well we don't have time for him to be as flinty and wary as John would have been in 2003, because we need to get to the part where he spends quality time with his family!" YES EXACTLY. The show is three hundred episodes old now and it deserves more than this speedy treatment put together seemingly for the concomitant promotional opportunity.

Anyway they have a Sit-n-Chat to catch John up on what they've been doing, including the living situation there at the bunker which includes an angel and the son of Lucifer. Goodness only knows what John is picturing.

Now that I think about it, the brothers should be hella wary too. I mean, what if the pearl is cursed? What if John is actually some shambling interdimensional beast masquerading as John? What if the whole thing is just a hallucination brought on by nefarious moon herbs in Paltrow's pookie pearl? They just uncharacteristically seem to rely on the pawn broker's ledger.

Fine! Fine! I’ll drop it.

They talk about how they met John's dad via time travel, too, but don't mention that's why John never saw him again after childhood. They talk about the Men of Letters, finally killing old Yellow Eyes, saving the world... Then just when they're about to tell him that Mary's back from the dead, she actually shows up and starts calling to her sons. What a coincidence! John is pained.

It seems like they didn't tell her, either? Did they just tell her to come over for a surprise or did she just happen to be on her way there anyway? Anyway John and Mary start in on a smoochy reunion so Sam and Dean quietly leave the room.

Sam's like, "How'd this happen?" And Dean's like, "We spent too much time on the teenager subplot instead of looking into this potentially dangerous thing, is how!"

For some reason, John is perusing the library alone instead of... um... making up for lost time with his hot wife. Sam goes to talk to him and finds out Mary's off writing a shopping list for Dean so she can make that emotionally important casserole again. This leads John to admit he fucked up with his kids. Sam is reluctant to blame John because he's had almost 13 years to get over it.

I hate that everyone's acting their little hearts out and all I can think is how painfully contrived the episode is. Whatever problems I have with the writing and the premise, I don't have a problem with the job the actors are doing. Okay, okay, I'm really letting go of it this time.

John rubs Sam's shoulder and tearfully says, "Son, I am so sorry." The cellos of sadness play sadly. "I'm sorry, too," says Sam. "You did your best, Dad. You fought for us, you loved us... that's enough."

It's one thing to decide you're going to move past the shitty, shitty things someone did because you're in the midst of the enormity of what's going on RIGHT NOW. But it's another thing for the show to minimize the past. John did NOT do his best. For fuck's sake, he left a little boy in charge of an even littler boy! Dean knew his Dad was possessed because his REAL dad would never be proud of him! When Dean stole food to feed Sam, John abandoned him to face the consequences!

God damn it I guess I'm not going to let it go, after all!

Anyway, Sam and Dean head into town for groceries and time paradoxes. The liquor store owner no longer recognizes Dean, which is the surest sign that something is Very Wrong. Dean is flabbergasted. "It's me! Dean Campbell! I come in here like... always!"

As Sam heads back to the car, he sees a wanted poster for his bro. It's the old Blue Steel one except I think Sam used to be on it too? He's not anymore. He heads back to the car to tell Dean, but Dean's already been a-googlin' on his phone.

He plays back a video of Sam as a turtleneck-wearing lawyer espousing a raw food diet with plenty of kale. Good lord how much raw food does someone the size of Sam have to eat to fulfill his daily caloric needs?

They kind of hand-wave how these new versions of themselves exist at the same time as the OG versions. "Our timeline is changing to this new one!" Sam says. He says they need to put things back the way they were or they'll be stuck. It's nice of the timeline to work slowly enough that they can figure this out.

Somewhere nearby, the angel Zachariah appears. Castiel moseys up beside him and he's brought some old friends.

They decide to head into the nearest pizza place. The teenagers are there because not even a paradox will get rid of this subplot. "Can I help you?" asks the waitress. I think the usual question would be, "Can I get you a table for two?" but whatever. Zachariah asks her who's been messing with time. "We sensed a disturbance in the, well, let's call it the Force," he says. Naturally, she's very confused, and even more confused when he says they're from Heaven.

He says he'll have Castiel murder everyone if they don't tell him what's going on. To emphasize this, Castiel whips out his angel mojo.

Sam and Dean see the bright light from across the street and come running in. Sam's like, "Zachariah?!" and Dean's like, "Cas?!" and Cas is like, "Is that with one S or two, and also who are you?"

Zachariah exposits that Heaven had big plans for the Winchesters but then their dad suddenly disappeared in 2003. Why wouldn't the angels assume the disappearance and the time event are connected? Why'd they have to just start asking questions in a random pizzeria? Fisticuffs ensue!

Zachariah force-chokes Sam while asking him for an explanation. Why do villains always try to make people talk while they're choking? Pick one or the other! But this gives Sam a chance to surprise Zachariah with an angel blade in the heart. Oh, Zachariah. Destined to die by Winchester in every version.

Meanwhile, Dean and Castiel are still tussling even though I'm pretty sure Castiel could kill them both pretty quick. Sam joins in for a bit, but gets flung into a table. If there's a table around, someone's getting flung into it. Then he goes back to strangling Dean instead of finishing off Sam, giving Sam a chance to make one of those angel-vanquishing sigils with his own blood.

They go back home. Dean explains the whole paradox thing to John. If he doesn't return to 2003, Dean will live the same life but alone, Mary will never have come back to life, and Sam will devastate kale crops like a moose-sized locust.

John agrees to go back. "Me versus your mom, that's not even a choice." That's... a weird way to phrase that dilemma. At the same time, Sam is delivering the news to Mary. He says "the lore is pretty clear" that if they destroy the pearl, everything goes back the way it was. What lore? They knew jack squat about it before they used it. Mary has some questions.

John tells Dean he's proud of him and I slightly expect Dean to whip a gun out on him. "I never meant for this.... I guess I hoped that eventually you get yourself a normal life..a family..."

WHAT.

WHAAAAAT.

He did nothing to prepare them for a normal life! Leaving your kids in motel rooms, never letting them settle down in one school, issuing ultimatums when Sam wanted to go to college? Man, Dean should've been like, "Nah, that was your other son, Adam, who got to live a normal life... at least until a ghoul ate him and his body was used by an archangel." But Dean is nicer than me, I guess. "I have a family," he says.

They decide to eat dinner even though who knows when the timeline is going to snap into place permanently. Oh my God they even take the time to wash the dishes after. They have a nice chat and again, everyone's acting their little hearts out and I'm trying not to be distracted. Dean tells Sam he doesn't want to change the past. "I'm good with who I am. I'm good with who you are." Please let that stick with no reversions to self-loathing and I'll retroactively like this episode more.

They cut to this shot and for a second I thought it was Sam and Dean holding hands at the sink.

Of course it's John and Mary. Sad piano plays sadly. John's not going to remember anything, but the rest of them will. Oh man what if John got Mary pregnant during his visit. Sam and Dean were out shopping for a while. I wish I hadn't thought that, but now that I have, you all have to be witness to my horrible brain's meanderings.

John reiterates that he's proud of them. So this time Sam pulls a gun on him! No, he doesn't. They all hug and cry genuine tears before John goes back to holding hands with Mary. Sam reluctantly smashes the pearl to bits. Seems like Dean would have to be the one to smash it since he's the one who made the wish, but it works and John slowly fades out of the present.

Everything goes back to normal, including the teenagers remembering and loudly discussing the existence of monsters in public.

Castiel returns to the bunker in his newer, homelier coat and less erotically tousled hair. "What happened?" he asks. The response in my brain:

Back in 2003, John wakes up in the Impala to the sound of his flip phone ringing. Smart phones are great and all but man I miss the battery life of my flip. It's the Dean of the day calling to check on him. John, although he's not supposed to remember anything from the future, seems to have experienced it as some kind of dream. He seems nicer, too. This will probably have no bearing on the timeline, though... right?

I mean, is that 2019 casserole still in his stomach? Did the wine turn back into grapes? Probably not but these are the kinds of things I think about.

Sigh.

I feel the episode does a disservice to its main characters. I've already ranted more than enough so I'll just pick one example:

If Sam had gone on to live a normal life, he would've become a cold-hearted douchebag who tells people that hobbies and families are a waste of time. Like, ha ha yes it's amusing that Sam is the leaf-munching Steve Jobs of law, but what's the meaning here? Are we saying that wanting to get an education for himself means he's a selfish asshole? Like this is the alternative to the codependent relationship with Dean that formed because of their father? Argh.

The John apologia is just so clunky and unnecessary. John could've said, "I should've done more than teach you to hunt monsters... prepared you for a normal life so you could have a family." Then Dean ccould say, "Being able to kill monsters kept us alive long enough so that we figured out things for ourselves. And we do have a family." Bam! It lets John be rueful without rewriting the past or having Dean swallow all the years of hurt and it even acknowledges that knowing how to hunt isn't a bad thing.

Thank you for sticking with the recap to the end! I do still intend to recap past episodes but things have been kind of stressful. Just staying afloat has been a chore some days.

For updates and info you can check here: https://www.gofundme.com/winter-rent-and-dog-care

I also have a virtual tip jar of sorts here: https://www.paypal.me/tippiblevins

[amandajoyce118]

Daredevil Season 3 Easter Eggs And References

I somehow managed to watch the full season in about a week. Probably because I actually had a day off of work in there. These season of Daredevil borrows heavily from two very famous comic book arcs, “Born Again,” and “Guardian Devil.” If you’re familiar with the comics, you probably saw a few things coming. That being said, there aren’t a huge amount of Easter eggs in the season.

As usual, the Easter eggs are broken down by episode so if you want to read as you go without being spoiled for future episodes, you can. This is spoiler-heavy though, so if you’re trying to steer clear and haven’t watched the season yet, look away. I’ll understand.

I didn’t spend a lot of time explaining who people are if they’ve appeared in the show before, maybe just a reminder here and there in case they didn’t make a huge impression on you.

So, onto the Easter eggs!

S3E01 “Resurrection”

Father Lantom

I’m sure we all remember him from earlier seasons, but this is just a reminder of his role in the comics. In the comics, he also provides a place of refuge for Cloak And Dagger as well as the Runaways. Taking in heroes with sad backstories is kind of his thing.

St. Agnes

Again, sure everyone recognizes it, but also just a reminder that on Agents of SHIELD, the orphanage where Daisy Johnson AKA Skye AKA Mary Sue Poots spent her youth was also called St. Agnes. I’d still love a connection.

The Timeline

Despite Matt waking up and seemingly thinking he just made it out of a collapsed building, it’s actually been “several weeks,” which probably puts this happening right around the same time as the events of the most recent season of Luke Cage or Iron Fist. More episodes will likely clear this up.

Sister Maggie

She is a comic book character, plucked from the pages of the “Born Again” story arc. There’s likely a big reveal coming with Sister Maggie, so I won’t spoil that for you. She also features prominently in the “Guardian Devil” story arc.

Ben Donovan

This lawyer certainly gets around. Taking care of Wilson Fisk still even though he was devoting so much time to Mariah Dillard over on Luke Cage.

Fisk And The Wall

After he gets bad news, he stares at the white wall of his prison cell. You’ll remember in season one, he liked “White Rabbit In A Snowstorm” because it helped him think. It’s also how he was forced to deal with his father abusing his mother.

Rymon Cable

The van that has bad guys Matt decides to test himself against? It’s full of clothes even though it has the Rymon Cable logo on it. There’s no comic book connection to Rymon, but Holly S. Rymon is a “production executive” on the series. She’s also worked on Iron Fist, Luke Cage, Jessica Jones, and The Punisher over the last two years.

S3E02 “Please”

Fisk’s Deal

This deal isn’t unlike ones he’s made in the comics to further his own ends. During “Civil War” he actually passes information about Captain America to Iron Man, which briefly makes him a target for other criminals. He tries to get his stature back by putting a hit out on Spider-Man and his family, which backfires when Spider-Man shows up in prison and beats him to a pulp.

Karen’s Backstory

In the comics, she’s an only child, but she does have darker and darker side stories. She becomes a drug addict and a prostitute at one point, so I’m curious to see how much the writers reveal of her dark backstory here.

Blackout Cripples NY

This headline appears on a new newspaper clipping on the wall in Karen’s Bulletin office. Now, all of the other clippings were there before the office belonged to her, courtesy of Ben Urich. That means this new headline is likely one of her stories. That story is likely in response to the blackouts that happened all over the world in Agents of SHIELD season four when a hate group was making a statement about Inhumans.

Blake Tower

You all remember Blake Tower, right? He’s been showing up on multiple shows, just like Ben Donovan, Claire Temple, and Turk Barrett.

“Hell’s Kitchen is ground zero for vigilantes…”

Foggy’s not wrong. Daredevil, Iron Fist, Jessica Jones, and Luke Cage have all been around in the last few years. Iron Fist promised to protect Hell’s Kitchen, but the events of his last season changed things up a bit.

S3E03 “No Good Deed”

Kingpin’s White/Grey/Lavender Penthouse

The color scheme for Wilson Fisk’s room is very reminiscent of his clothing choices in the comics.

The Presidential Hotel

Was it just me who noticed the hotel, combined with the “Lock Fisk up,” the fake news comments, and the fact that the owner was convicted of fraud? I think those are a lot of real world shoutouts right there, and I appreciate every single one of them.

Fisk’s White Suit

Matt might be hallucinating Fisk, but this is Kingpin’s comic book look. It’s perfect.

Millar

I couldn’t make out the second name of the electrical/plumbing company Matt sneaks into the hotel with, but the first in the logo is definitely Millar. Frank Miller is typically the name associated with Daredevil, but I feel like Millar is a shoutout to comic book creator Mark Millar. He’s better known for the Kick-Ass franchise and his work for DC, but he’s also written on some X-Men books, some Fantastic Four, and some Spider-Man, as well as the “Civil War” arc.

Vanessa Hiding In Spain

Vanessa frequently has to hide out in the comics to escape the wrath of Wilson’s enemies. Spain isn’t usually a big spot for her, but Wilson lived there for about a year in the comics before Lady Bullseye caught up with him and sent a bunch of Hand ninjas after him.

Agent Poindexter

He seems to like the nickname Dex and he has a great skillset - never missing his mark. Benjamin Poindexter is the main alias of a villain named Bullseye in the comics, and I don’t think that’s spoiling anything for you since casting rumors and trailers should have done that already. He’s probably Daredevil’s biggest enemy, not Kingpin. So, that’s going to be fun to watch develop.

Matt’s Clothes

Not his vigilante ensemble, which is a callback to him first starting out in season one. His walking around clothes. It looks a lot like how Stick used to dress when he was in New York, huh? Guess Matt is taking cues from his former sensei.

Matt Picking Foggy’s Pocket

Okay, so I realize this is just a means to an end for Matt, but I like to think of it as another connection between Matt and Daisy. Both orphans at St. Agnes (possibly the same one), both steal the ID of someone who meets with them in order to get more info. (In Daisy AKA Skye’s case, it was Mike Peterson in the Agents of SHIELD pilot.)

S3E04 “Blindsided”

District Attorney Foggy Nelson

Foggy was District Attorney of New York City for a while in the comics. He also became Chief of Staff for the mayor for a while too.

The Prison Fight Sequence

Less an Easter egg and more a reminder that Daredevil is known for doing a spectacular single take fight sequence every season. This one, where the cameraman literally just followed Charlie Cox from room to room lasted nearly a crazy 15 minutes. No cuts. That’s impressive.

“We were just being friendly.”

And Karen pulls a gun on some guys up to no good. I feel like she and Jessica Jones need to hang out more. They could just intimidate skeevey guys in alleys for laughs.

Trucks Full Of Chemicals

The FBI agent’s story about her dad hauling chemicals, I think, made a nice nod to the fact that both Matt Murdock and Jessica Jones got their abilities from trucks full of chemicals hitting them in the comics.

Felix Manning

“Felix” has been the name of the person in charge of Vanessa’s location, so I’m going to wager they’re one in the same. He also appears in a whopping two comic books - Daredevil issues 230 and 231. He wanted Melvin Potter, who appeared early in the Netflix series, to make him a duplicate of the Daredevil costume. He was actually killed by a Daredevil imposter. Foreshadowing? We’ll see.

A Taxi To The Water

A version of this happened in “Born Again.” It didn’t get rid of Matt, but it did make him a little more loopy.

S3E05 “The Perfect Game”

Fisk Giving Matt’s Name

There is a story in the comics where Fisk implicates Matt as a vigilante and gets him arrested. The FBI, however, decides not to take the deal with him, and they put Fisk in prison for numerous crimes as well. This clearly isn’t playing out exactly the same way, but, when Matt and Fisk try to break out of prison during a riot, it’s Bullseye who has to save them. I can’t help but wonder if there was a little inspiration there.

Felix Threatens Karen

Again, a little hint of her backstory here. In the comics, she’s also from the New England area. Her father, Paxton Page, who gets namechecked in the threat, actually became a villain named Death’s Head in the comics.

Baseball And Bullseye

Cute that little Dex has a bullseye on his baseball cap in his childhood. Funnily enough, comic book villain Bullseye claims to have attempted to become a major league baseball player, but he got bored pitching a no hitter and threw the ball at the final hitter to kill him in a minor league game. Killing his coach when he pulls him from the game is a bit of a twist on that.

S3E06 “The Devil You Know”

Matt Doesn’t Take Karen’s Coffee

Luke Cage’s “coffee” has ruined he drink for everyone. Karen offering Matt a cup when he comes to her for help, and Matt refusing could be a sign that anything romantic between them is officially over. Or it means nothing. Who knows?

Karen Is Way Too Comfortable In A Drug Den

Karen is around drugs a lot this season. A lot. And it all seems to give a nod to her comic book story, but I feel like we’re inching toward more of her family backstory with just how comfortable she is buying drugs and making her way around other addicts.

“Maybe I’ll get lucky and they’ll lock me up next to Fisk.”

This did actually happen in the comics, as I’ve mentioned before. It’s a nice nod.

Felix Manning Getting Dex The Suit

Likewise, I also mentioned Felix being the one to get a copy of a Daredevil suit in the comics. Looks like his appearance was some foreshadowing after all.

Dex As Daredevil

Bullseye has actually dressed up as Daredevil in the comics as well. He’s not the only one. So has Foggy.

Karen Between Bullseye And A Victim

If Karen stepping between Dex and the witness gave you pause, it’s probably because you know how she loses her life in the comics. She gets between Bullseye and Matt in a fight, taking a lethal blow to save Matt’s life. This imagery is not going to be fun for Karen fans.

Side note: I’ve never really been a Karen Page fan because the comics put her firmly in the slot of victim. She never really outgrows that no matter who writes for her. But I love her this season. Maybe it’s because we got to see more of Karen being Karen than of trying to fill someone else’s shoes.

S3E07 “Aftermath”

The Hidden Room

Kingpin officially has a supervillain lair. Less of an Easter egg here and more of it being about time.

WJPBTV, WNEX, WHiH, etc

All of the news networks Fisk sees the Bulletin carnage on exist within the MCU already. WJPB is the news station most often seen in Luke Cage. WNEX is the station that aired Trish Talk. WHiH is the one most often seen in the movies. You get the idea.

Melvin Potter

AKA Gladiator in the comics is something of a gentle giant. He kind of fell into a life of crime, which is largely what Daredevil has done with him in the show as well. The shirt he’s wearing when Matt confronts him is a nod to his comic book costume. So are the saw blades. His girlfriend Betsy was, I believe, a social worker in the comics, not a parole officer. (BTW, the comic that features Matt, Fisk, and Bullseye breaking out of prison during a riot? Melvin’s in prison at the same time as well. Matt advises him to stay in his cell so he doesn’t get hurt.)

S3E08 “Upstairs/Downstairs”

Keys

As Karen nears the front door of her apartment, there’s a piece of paper from a legal pad that says “KEYS.” I love that she’s so focused on her work that she has likely forgotten to take her keys with her enough that it warrants a giant reminder.

Fisk’s Plan

His plan, of putting himself in charge of the criminal groups, is essentially what he wanted in season 2 as well when he gave Frank Castle a means to escape prison.

The Maggia

This is the first time the Italian-American version of the mafia has been mentioned in the present day in the MCU. I say present day because it did have its fingers in Agent Carter season two. In the comics, the Maggia gets the ire of quite a few heroes and antiheroes, but most often, the Punisher.

Sister Maggie

Unless you never read anything related to Daredevil at all, you were probably spoiled at some point that Sister Maggie was really Matt’s mom. People started speculating about the reveal being imminent as soon as there was a “get Maggie” at the end of The Defenders. In the comics, the reveal is a little different as Matt already suspected she was his mother before he found out for sure.

Apartment 131

Dex lives in apartment 131. What comic book did Bullseye make his debut in? Daredevil #131.

S3E09 “Revelations”

Kingpin

Wilson Fisk finally officially gets his codename. I like that we’re back to the season one idea of his lackeys not wanting to name him because someone is always watching/listening.

Karen’s Running

In the comics, Karen basically runs whenever things get hard. I’m kind of surprised she stuck things out this long on the show.

Rosalie Carbone

The woman we see Nadeem take in was last spotted in season two of Luke Cage making a play for Harlem. She’s the one with the Maggia connection. The other names we get are Hammond and Star. The only Hammond I know of in Marvel Comics was the original Human Torch. I’ve got nothing for Star, but the other names could have been picked at random. I don’t recognize the other two people at the table either.

S3E10 “Karen”

Karen Selling Drugs

At least this explains why she’s so comfortable in drug dens. I like that this gives us a nod to her comic book tragedy, but here she’s the seller instead of the addict.

Fagan Corners, Vermont

This is where Karen’s from in the comics as well. The name of the fictional town is an homage to Tom Rutland. Rutland organized an annual Halloween parade in Vermont themed around superheroes. He was actually written into Avengers comics in the 1970s.

Penny’s Place

Named for Karen’s mom in the comics, Penelope.

“... two lines away from doing blow jobs on the street for heroin…”

Maybe this isn’t true on the Netflix show, but yes, this happened in the comics.

Bullseye And Daredevil In The Church

Their in-church fight actually happened in the comics when Matt and Karen were hiding a baby in the church. The big difference here is that when Bullseye aimed a fatal blow at Daredevil with his own billy club, Karen got between them and died from her injury. Father Lantom takes the hit for Karen here.

S3E11 “Reunion”

Custos Diaboli

This is inscribed above the gate to get to the basement where Matt and Karen hide out. From the Latin, in translates to Guardian Devil, one of the comic book arcs the series draws from.

KTTA And ZCN

These are two of the networks I could make out on the mics in front of Fisk when he has a press conference outside of the hotel. KTTA is a television station from the comics that frequently reported on the Thunderbolts. ZCN already exists in the Netflix universe. They offered Trish Walker a job in the second season of Jessica Jones.

Nelson & Murdock: Attorneys At Law

Leave it to Foggy to formally name them as they were named in the comics (and the first season of the show).

Side note: I love the Holocaust survivor standing up to Fisk and refusing to give him her family’s painting. It very much reminds me of the scene in The Avengers when Loki demands everyone kneel, but one man reminds the crowd, “there are always men like you,” and refuses. It’s a great reminder that so many comic book creators, during an era when comics flourished, were Jewish, and their relatives were being persecuted and killed half a world away.

S3E12 “One Last Shot”

Vanessa Embracing The Kingpin

Not a lot of Easter eggs in this episode that I noticed, but I thought it was important to point out that in the normal timeline of the comics, Vanessa isn’t a part of Wilson’s criminal undertakings. In alternate timelines though, she’s the Kingpin herself. Her embracing his work and wanting to be a part of it feels like the writers are trying to find some middle ground there.

Side note: Some fans pointed out on twitter that the Morales vs Parker poster in Fogwell’s Gym is a nod to the Spider-Man characters of Marvel Comics. I find that unlikely only because there are plenty of boxers who have shared those names. It’s more likely a coincidence, especially since most of the names in previous seasons were nod to production team members and writers.

S3E13 “A New Napkin”

The Rose

Interesting that Vanessa specifies Fisk should pick the rose. Why? In the comics, Fisk’s son Richard became a vigilante who used the name the Rose. In fact, he wanted to overthrow his father at one point. His mother was the one who killed him. Will Vanessa become the Rose instead? It would be a nice touch.

The Crystals Bounce Off Fisk’s Suit Jacket

In the comics, Fisk actually wears kevlar under his suits to prevent any of his enemies from surprising him with bullets or knives. In the first season, his body armor that he was wearing were designed by Melvin Potter and he wore them under his suits. It seems he might have gotten an upgrade as everything just bounces off of it instead of tearing it, and he gives his jacket to Vanessa to prevent her being hit by anything.

Karen’s More Stable Than Jessica Jones

There are probably a lot of people more stable than Jessica Jones, Matt, jeez. That doesn’t mean she’s not a great detective.

Dex’s Injury And Cognium

In the comics, Bullseye did some time paralyzed. Of course, like all comic book characters, it didn’t last forever. Something else Dex had in the comics? A spine laced with adamantium. Yep, the same stuff on Wolverine’s bones. It’s what made him so indestructible. The MCU probably can’t use it since it’s reserved for the X-Men movies. At least not until everything about the Disney-FOX deal is official.

Dr. Oyama

This doc goes by another name in the comics. Kenji Oyama is Lord Dark Wind. This is the comic book doctor who found a way to make adamantium bond to bone. Wolverine and Bullseye have him to think for their bone structure.

Dex’s Eye

That final shot of Dex’s eye makes what we’ve all been waiting for clear. Dex is definitely officially Bullseye now.

Side note: The milk crates in the freezer with the bodies that have ice all over them? Must have been there for years. I’ve got milk crates used to store product in my freezer at work, and they never build up frost. And our freezer is kept far below zero. Also? I love how much Rosalie Carbone appreciates theatrics. And how Vanessa just wanders around in the background after Fisk repeatedly tells her to leave while there’s a huge fight going on. That’s all.