#in my rewatch & god i'm so gay for her

[thelovingpolyglot]

Whenever I try to gaslight myself into thinking I'm not a lesbian i just need to watch the L word again and realize no man would be able to make me bite my lip through a screen

[gayforcarstairsgirls]

Oh god the byler brainrot has truly and fully set in I just rewatched the season 3 finale and during Hopper's final letter thing to El at the end I suddenly noticed the points at which they chose to focus on Mike and it's just so gay I can't even

[decaying-vampire]

fuck holy shit women stop being perfectly imperfect for one second challenge. Like oh my god what is UP. Oh my god like fuck I love women. shit shit shit. it's so gay at this point it's so gay.

[dmeblnche]

have you ever seen a woman so beautiful you cry? 🥹

[shapelytimber]

Wanted to paint some of my favorite characters, nothing more nothing less

[COMMISSIONS]

Way too much yapping like an embarrassing amount, the individual portraits and the template I used below vvv

I shouldn't be allowed to talk about my favorite characters- especially to people who (presumably) don't know them xjfkdk apart from the very popular ones ofc

ILLYA KURYAKIN (The man from U.N.C.L.E)

gay ass little Russian spy I love him he is so *dramatic* and a huge nerd and a Beatles fan and into fashion design- perfect pocket size blorbo ;w; also seeing a Russian character being given a positive leading role in an American tvshow from the 60s ?? Yes he lives in New York and works for UNCLE America.... But he is still a communist ?? Incredible ! Also I really like the fact he isn't given the cliché personality traits often given to Russian characters i e anger issues drinks a lot violent ect (looking at you shitty(imo) modern remake... What did you do to my little guy ;;). In a close contest with Spock for the "gayest man from tvshow" of the 60s..... And in my heart he is winning djdkd for me the gay subtext of muncle hits so much more because it's not a scifi show- it's closer to home, Napoleon and Illya were *like that* in the present day of the 60s, they were both human, and no alien fuckery made them go to the village more than once or play house in the suburbs or get attached ass up to get pegged on a regular basis... Truly a show that feels written by an old queen and a guy with the biggest fem dom fetish jkvjjkb (don't get me wrong tho I adore star trek tos and spirk too <3)

KUROO HAZAMA and PINOKO (Black Jack)

sometimes I rewatch some of the oavs from the 90s when I'm sad :) I had a huge phase a couple years back when I read nearly all the manga (should really finish it... Or reread the whole thing frankly), watched *all* the shows (bar young black jack, hated that shit) and idk I just love this venal bitch so much- him and his daughter and his conflicted feelings for his tboy ex that he still loves kfkfkf btw I'm dying for a modern take on this like please please please I'd love to see Kei Kisaragi's story rewritten a bit (trans character in the 70s sure was progressive but oh boy-), because him and black jack's relationship makes me so *weak*.... And maybe see him a bit more than in one story- anyway ! When it comes to his daughter Pinoko, it's very hit or miss- when the writers lean on the cute father adoptive daughter relationship it's great, when they lean more on the whole "she has a crush on him" (very much like a child in most case, and he *never* reciprocate thank god) and bring up the fact she is technically 18 a lot (she was an evil tumor trapped in her sister before he created a body for her- black jack shit dw), and she gets jealous of other women.... Well it's terrible and I'm uncomfy :(

EVA KANT (Diabolik)

Look.... You just can't show me danger diabolik 1968 and not expect me to become insane djdkdkdk she is so cool ;; !!! Her and her devious eel of a man (here as a panther, because even tho I haven't read the comic yet, I'm taking an educated guess that all the panther imagery is here to represent him, the lethal twunk always in the all black gimp suit... And if it's not then fuck my entire life ig fjfkkd), the cuntiest het couple you've ever seen, such freaks I love them ! Partners in crime that will blow up the tax offices of the whole country if you try to put a bounty on them <3 they are in the guilty faves category only because I'm this invested in these characters after 1 (one) movie fkfkf watched the first two remakes and was hmmm let's say underwhelmed, could have been worse but going after the 60s one ie peak cinema was hard... I went in fully invested in these heterosexuals and they still fucked up their romance and relationship ;; (don't spoil me the third one btw haven't seen it yet ! I know it's the yaoi one- which doesn't give me much hope for Eva tbh...) I'll soon start reading the comics tho ! Managed to find all twelve volumes of "Il grande Diabolik" in french for pretty cheap so I'm excited for that :D (might scan them and upload them online because omg I tried finding scans in *any* language and only found a dubious website that sold digital copies for 7€ a volume ??? What is this)

UTA (The Void / Тургор / Turgor / Tension)

Apathy girlyyyyy she just like me for real for real nfkfk what absolutely charmed me about her is yes her design, but more importantly her chamber's design (if you've never played the void, a sister's chamber is a space that represent her. You get a sense of who she is by exploring her chamber before finding her and talking to her soul it's great). The lonely island out at sea, her laying down on a suspended steel boat in a grotto, looking passively at the moon by a crack on the ceiling.... And the moon is looking back. Incredible ! I love this game so much

KIM KITSURAGI (Disco Elysium)

Do I really have to explain this one ? When I played the game with quiji I remember I kept saying "when Kim talks, we *listen*" djkdk we did get a good grade in Kim Kitsuragi and got him to dance in the church <3 this fucking centrist cop wormed it's way into my heart and many others because of course he did. The only Kim K in my eyes. Also funny anecdote : before I played Disco Elysium, I had one concept art masterclass where a kinda famous concept artist came to give advice, make us really stressed then give us a shitty grade.... And when I tell you this man looked so much like Kim ??? Same haircut, glasses, face with a scar *exactly* where Kim's portrait has a stark shadow on his cheek and he was dressed in an orange top- truly uncanny. Anyway, Kim is so fucking cool how does he do it

DARK VADOR (La guerre des étoiles)

*sight* not surprising if you know me... and to be clear when I say Vader I don't mean Anakin Skywalker, post barbecue only zouz here. I refuse to yap about this man djdkdk I already do that way to much in ao3 comment sections

And here is the template I used ! Don't know who made it tho sorry...

PS : all these where made in 2-3 hours each :D wanted to challenge myself by painting quickly, and I mostly (looking at the Eva Kant one that gave me trouble) succeeded !

[trashwithvariety]

so this has probably already been talked about in great detail since the end of the show (hannibal) but I just did a rewatch and I can't shut up about it. the incredible level of subtle details in this show is already insane but I noticed it much clearer in my rewatch during season 3 part two how quickly we see Will change.

during *The Great Red Dragon*, Will is back to mostly his pre-Hannibal self. We see him married with a family out in the country with his dogs and more specifically his clothes (I am going to be very specific about what he wears in this because it's these details that are so subtle but make his change so much more crispy). He's wearing very practical, warm weather clothes, looks like an outdoorsman.

like, reminder that this ↓

is how he shows up to meet Hannibal again for the first time in years. Glasses, coat, clearly clothes he would not think twice about wearing anywhere, kind of like how he dresses in season one. It's also in his expression and his stature (which bless Hugh Dancy for his portrayal of Will because I don't know who else could have done the subtle changes so eloquently)

now let me take you to the episode directly after (And the Woman Clothed with the Sun) he first sees Hannibal and has to come back to talk to him

i'm sorry??? Immediately with the crisp button down, tucked in, with the top buttons undone, hair slicked back, NO GLASSES and look. Look at how he stands and his expression and how comfortable he is, hands in pockets.

okay further evidence. And honestly arguably the scariest piece

it's the dead-eyed stare for me. We all know what happened to Chilton after this, and it's the fact that he knew what he was doing. God, Will was never more like Hannibal than he was at the end of season three. Clothes are not much different on purpose because he's playing the game now.

Sidebar that in almost all the scenes that he's bitchily talking to Bedelia, he's also very well dressed as if he's taking Hannibal's place in his manipulation of her.

By the time we see him in The Wrath of the Lamb, he has already decided that he wants Hannibal back. Vaguely suggesting to Jack to use Hannibal as bait for the Dragon, as if he didn't very well consider all the outcomes would likely lead to Hannibal escaping. The way they're looking conspiratorially at each other in the back of the van. How Will isn't even remotely surprised he walks out unscathed or how he doesn't question letting him drive them to wherever they're going to meet the dragon.

And once they get to the cliffside house, and they get settled and Will?

His shirt is tight, his expression is the SAME as the one Hannibal had in episode ONE season ONE, as he watches Hannibal BLEED OUT and wonders probably what they will do.

There are plenty of ways everyone that worked on this show displayed how Will was changing but I loved how they used his clothes to do it and how Hugh used his expressions to differentiate pre-Hannibal and post-Hannibal Will.

I could write a dissertation on this show it's insane and I will never shut up about my murderous gay husbands.

[sgiandubh]

What sort of marketing is this? Why do they air this TV Insider interview with David Berry on YouTube b e f o r e the episode airs when they ask detailed questions about what happens in the episode and tell us practically everything? Was it an accidentc or the way to entice the audience to increase the ratings or ⭐ marketing strategy sucks?

On a happier note, allow me to interpret David's answers:

"I was ready to explore the love scene further but there were negotiations because Sam interfered. I feel very uncomfortable talking about just as I was extremely nervous to pretend that I was having sexual relations with his wife both on and off screen. We practically improvised the whole scene. Cait was aggressive because she felt uncomfortable doing it knowing that Sam will watch it. She didn't want to be in it as much as I didn't. We didn't rehearse much because Sam was very much against the scene being filmed. I'm seriously avoiding Sam now. He is very strong and protective of Cait. It feels weird being in his presence. Thank God for the scripts that don't give us many interactions afterwards."

I genuinely sorry for David. What a peculiar position he was and quite possibly still is in!

Dear Peculiar Position Anon,

I will give my take on it when I get to the third (Jesus, what a scandal!) batch of #jottings. Spoiler, though: it wasn't as terrible as I thought it would be.

As for your interpretation, yours is as good as anybody's, of course. I would be much more reserved: this is, after all, acting (I am serious, this time) and I don't think these three people would be as naive as to give it such a childish connotation. I think SC and David are very good friends and, while I do agree S is very protective of C, I wouldn't go as far as you did.

Anyways, for those who missed it, here is the interview you are referring to:

May I also add that I like David Berry a LOT? Rewatching the interview, I think he gave us one of the most credible feedbacks ever on what it means to shoot a difficult scene, while you just knew all eyes would be upon it and expectations over the roof.

It also goes to show - and David has been endearingly honest about it - just how hard it is to shoot such a scene (all the 'really difficult' preparation process, the things that 'ended on the cutting room floor', the 'negotiation') when you don't have the organic famous 'shorthand' and 'ease' S&C always mention, when they talk about their intimate scenes.

That 'shorthand' and that' ease' have a name, Anon. We know exactly what that is about.

I also loved what David shared about his own research on gay people's approach to love, feelings' management (if I may say so) and intimacy. All I will say right now (I might get back to it later, who knows?) is that he did it respectfully and empathetically. A very, very difficult thing to achieve, I believe, that speaks volumes about how special David Berry is, both as an actor and a person (note to self: buy Landcon extras!).

Finally, you might want to compare the above interview with the somewhat sanitized, in-house narrative of ***:

Quite different things, I believe. And I so wish Maril would shut the dang up about what obviously is way above her range!

[weirdly-specific-but-ok]

read more of the good omens book. i am in love with crowley. go away.

I'M DONE WITH THE SECTION WEDNESDAY AND GOD DEAR GOD AND SATAN AND EVERYONE IN BETWEEN I AM SO FUCKING IN LOVE WITH CROWLEY IT HURTS.

This is exactly why I was petrified of the bloody book. It's going to make the brainrot irredeemably deep. Entire bodyrot, in fact. Even Tommy (yes I named my haematoma Tommy, and he's trans, so he's a he/himatoma) will succumb to the rot.

THE LINE: "RIGHT," MUMBLED CROWLEY, SUDDENLY FEELING VERY ALONE. IT IS MY ROMAN EMPIRE. IT HURTS ME EVERY DAY SINCE I FIRST READ IT, WHICH WAS WHEN I GOT THE BOOK LIKE A MONTH AGO. I OPENED IT AT A RANDOM SECTION AND READ THAT AND PROMPTLY SHUT THE BOOK AND PROCEEDED TO CRY. THAT WAS THE MOMENT I BEGAN TO FEAR THE BOOK.

Aziraphale, you silly, silly, adorable little prissy motherfucker. What a bastard.

Sister Mary Loquacious making up her mind to have an orgasm gives a whole new subtext to my thirst for her during the rewatch of episode one.

RIGHT MUMBLED CROWLEY SUDDENLY FEELING VERY ALONE.

OW.

DOG IS THE BEST THE CUTEST EVER. EVEN WHEN HE WAS BIG AND HELLHOUNDY. HIS CONFUSION AT TURNING SMALL BUT THEN IT BEING OVERRIDDEN BY HIS LOVE FOR ADAM. IT JUST. AWWWWW.

Anathema carries a foot-long bread knife with her. Queen shit.

THE FACT THAT THEY GOT SHOT BY PAINTBALLS AND IMMEDIATELY CROWLEY THINKS HE'S DEAD AND STARTS WORRYING ABOUT PAPERWORK. ALL THAT CLUES HIM IN IS THAT THE BLOOD IS YELLOW. AND THEN HE TASTES IT TO CHECK IF IT'S PAINT WTF CROWLEY.

Warlock's birthday party omg. Aziraphale looking at Crowley desperately for help and Crowley pointedly refusing to meet his gaze because he's cringing from second-hand embarrassment and staring out of the window. I read that bit when I got out of the X-ray for Tommy and it made me smile on a very shit day.

Right mumbled Crowley suddenly feeling very alone.

Okay but ngl Crowley was entirely right? He turned the paintball guns to real guns, but the humans continued to shoot each other even after they realised the switch. Not his fault.

Oh Lord, heal this bike. So it was from the book, too.

Aziraphale being like let's get the fuck outta here before the police come coz I'll morally have to assist them with enquiries is so babygirl of him for real. You little bastard, you.

"A CAR BELONGING TO TWO CONSENTING REPAIRMEN" ah yes "THOSE TWO GAY RANDOS IN THE BENTLEY ARE DEFINITELY HAVING SEX"

I love Aziraphale. Crowley makes a man faint from fear and Aziraphale isn't all that pissed because he's salty about the man ruining his expensive shirt. Oh, Aziraphale.

So attracted to War in an awful way. It makes so much sense how attractive in an awful way she is.

Pouring one out for Mr and Mrs Threlfall of 9, The Elms, Paignton.

"Right," mumbled Crowley, suddenly feeling very alone.

Slightly desperate italics is a phrase I didn't know I needed in my life but during my inevitable next war with fucking typefaces, I will definitely use. Fuck I had design work to do for my mum. AH WELL, CROWLEY, CROWLEY, CROWLEY.

In response to watch out for that pedestrian, Crowley says It's on the street, it knows the risks it's taking! Crowley supports it/its pronouns, pass it on.

Where do you live my dear? Aziraphale oozed. OOZED. OMG.

RIGHT, CROWLEY MUMBLED, SUDDENLY FEELING VERY ALONE.

Everyday, my-homoerotic-tension-and-love-hate-relationship-with-my-copy-of-this-book's a-getting stronger... WHY MUST THAT LINE HURT ME SO MUCH.

[shutupineedtothink]

I NEVER expected this show to match Wandavision levels of dropping breadcrumbs and slowly leading you on a journey to figure out what in the ever loving fuck is going on, like mystery after mystery after mystery, little hints dropped here that manifest there and make you go back and rewatch and take notes on everyone's acting choices and specific dialogue (i.e. bury me in the kitchen 👀), not to mention the slow build thats happening of Agatha as a character, a mother (??), and especially the leader of this group of powerful but misfit women. Oh my god she has so much more depth and intrigue already than I know what to do with. Also is teen her son?? Wanda's son?? Some rando? I have so many questions and I'm so happy about it!! Also yes its very gay

[curlyjohnlock]

Hi,

I'm new to this. I'm genuinely curious how johnlock fandom happened. I watched sherlock and didn't notice any chemistry between them. I'm just trying to understand. And how do you feel about Ben and Martin not liking each other in real life? Thanks.

Hello anon!

The Johnlock fandom was born long before BBC Sherlock aired. I think there was a speculation about them in the late 1800s but, obviously, talking about homosexuals was out of the question at the time. But the ship took off in 2010, when it all started.

I have met several people in the fandom who told me they didn't notice anything romantic between the two at first viewing, but then they had to change their minds with rewatches.

Now, it must be said that the characters themselves constantly imply that the two of them behave like a couple.

1. Mrs Hudson

From the first moment, in A Study in Pink, she believes that Sherlock has brought his new 'boyfriend' home.

In The Empty Hearse, she can't believe that John is now engaged to a woman.

"So soon after Sherlock?"

"Hmm... well, yes."

"What's his name?"

"It's a woman."

"A wOmAn?!?" and then she laughs. She sounds rather incredulous, perhaps believing he is moking her.

"You really have moved on, haven't you?"

2. Mycroft

Nobody knows Sherlock better than Mycroft. In A Study in Pink, when he meets John for the first time, he says: "Might we expect a happy announcement by the end of the week?" and literally Sherlock and John met the DAY BEFORE! Why would Mycroft bother stalking a poor army doctor if he doesn't believe that Sherlock could be attracted to him? 🤷🏼‍♀️

In The Final Problem, Mycroft already knew that Sherlock would sacrifice him and save John. Sherlock loves John more than Mycroft, AND HE'S HIS OWN BROTHER!

3. Angelo [the restaurant owner in A Study in Pink (although I prefer the one in the Unaired Pilot, better known as the Gay Pilot)].

Angelo has known Sherlock for years, and why would he make Sherlock attractive to John? "Hey, you know this macho guy got me out of prison?" "OH! Wait! I'll get you a phallus candle, that'll be very romantic. 🥰😍😛"

4. Donovan

In The Great Game, when Sherlock finds the abandoned car, Donovan says to John: "I see you're still hanging around him. Opposites attract, I suppose."

This one may not be the best example, but it's worth including.

5. Irene Adler

My God that woman. She's in love with Sherlock, and that's fine. Who wouldn't fall in love with Sherlock or his brain? But she also knows that Sherlock only has his heart set on John. In A Scandal in Belgravia, when they go to her house, she immediately says to Sherlock: "And somebody loves you. If I had to punch that face, I'd avoid your nose and teeth too."

Then, when John goes to Battersea and meets her, she asks: "Are you jealous?"

"We're not a couple."

"Yes, you are."

Again, she met them for literally 3 minutes and immediately realised it!

6. Mary

Mary should hate Sherlock to death (and I'm still convinced that she never liked Sherlock).

What was that proverb again? Respect the owner's dog for your own sake. It means: like the dog to please the owner. Or something like that.

In this case, the owner is John and the dog is Sherlock. It's obvious that at a certain point Mary starts shipping them, almost as if she doesn't really care about John.

7. Magnussen

In His Last Vow, Magnussen meets Sherlock and John for a few minutes, and immediately tells them: "You two are sooo domesticated." Later in the episode, he tells Sherlock that John is "your damsell in distress."

I hope this was exhaustive from Johnlock's point of view! Maybe try looking at it from another point of view and rewatch the whole serie. At that point, if you're still not convinced, it's okay, anon, we don't bite!

Moving on to Benedict and Martin... we all know that Martin has a particular character and that he has trouble getting along with literally anyone, but I don't believe the newspapers. They are journalists, they HAVE to cause a SCANDAL!! Otherwise no one would read them. They take sentences from a completely different context and pass them off as true. Take for example when it was said that Benedict had called Martin 'pathetic.'

There is a video of this interview. The presenter asked Benedict to drink tea the way Martin drinks it, Benedict imitates him and then says 'pathetic', but it is not strictly intended to refer to Martin.

I know for a fact that Martin took it out on Benedict when he got married to Sophie Hunter, just because he didn't invite Martin to his wedding. On the same day, Amanda reported Martin's tantrums on twitter!!! 🤣🤣

Anyway! Even if the rumors were true, it doesn't matter. It's their problem, not ours.

Yes, it may upset us as fans, but these two are real people in the real life.

I'll conclude with this. If you have any other questions, feel free to contact me again! And anyone is welcome to comment on this or ask me anything. 👋🏻

[beepborpdoodledorp]

alright, I'm in need of a palate cleanser, TADC Episodes ranking because why not

Now that Episode 4's marked the (almost) halfway point of the show it's as good a time as any to do a personal ranking and also I want to procrastinate working on more angsty fanart as much as possible for my own sanity

Mystery of Mildenhall Manor

What is there that I can even add to this conversation, the episode is fucking stellar. Pomni and Kinger's dynamic is impeccable start to end and I'm a sucker for anything remotely resembling the found family trope so that just further elevates my opinion, and as both an avid Zooble enjoyer and a very un-cis person their subplot hit me hard. And oh my God, the hallway scene, it's still my single favorite moment in the entire show. The soundtrack, the atmosphere, the gorgeous visuals, the emotional build-up from the conversation beforehand, I want to just absorb the essence of this scene into my bone structure. I've watched this episode twice so far and both times the hallway scene almost made me cry. I'd recommend this in a heartbeat to someone who isn't even interested in TADC or the wider genres it belongs to, it's just that fucking good. 

2. Fast Food Masquerade

It is. Probably not that hard to figure out where I stand on this episode considering how much I've been annoying every TADC tag under the sun the past 72 hours. I absolutely adored this episode, was literally everything I wanted and more based on the promo material. I love Gangle, her storyline about hiding her depression hit way too hard, I love Zooble, I love Gangle and Zooble being gay as fuck, I love Ragatha being absolutely fried the entire episode, I love Jax showing three whole seconds of human decency. Gummigoo. Oh my God. With how much praise I just threw Episode 3's way it's probably weird to learn I actually think Episode 4 is an overall better episode (by a very thin margin, but still), it just gave us a lot more interactions and development with the group as a whole which is something we were mostly lacking in up until this point usually due to the group being separated at some point or another during an adventure. In all honesty if Episode 3 didn't have the hallway scene I'd probably put it in this spot, but it does and the hallway scene fucks so Episode 4 is down here. 

3. Candy Carrier Chaos

Again, what can I even add to this conversation. A great expansion after our first taste of TADC, Gummigoo solos, I love sentient AIs undergoing existential crises as they come to terms with the implications of their existence. My one major complaint (which I had back when the episode first released and it's just been amplified with the last two episodes' releases) is just that we don't get much content of any of the main cast besides Pomni, their interactions are surface-level and don't offer us basically anything new from what we saw of them in the pilot. But that also wasn't what the episode was about so I can mostly give it a pass.

4. PILOT

The pilot was a very good jumping off point for the series and is decent as a standalone, but after rewatching it about a month or two back I don't think it's aged all that well. Again, it's still a perfectly fine watch and does its job of setting up all the stepping stones for the series, but the best way I can describe the pilot is…cluttered. It's just a lot of information and events you need to fit into one twenty-minute episode, so most of the episode goes at a breakneck pace in between a lot of back-to-back jokes that sometimes miss the mark (mostly the fault of Caine, I love him but he is definitely a character who is most effective in short bursts of screentime). You can definitely tell they were still trying to get a feel of things while making this episode and that's completely fine! It's a pilot, that's the whole point. Just doesn't really hold up when compared to its successors.

[jinxini]

thoughts while watching episode 3! ☆

summary: i love the sisters so much and my heart aches ㅠ.ㅠ

caitlyn: yeah i don't think so.

girl, i don't know about that. you took vi and a random homeless guy with you. they have zero training.

the way vi drops the gauntlets before embracing caitlyn... <3

get this gay ass furry off my screen fghsjkalal i know there are going to be so many freaks who'll love him though 😂 lowkey dislike the voice also idk it's the vibe, the outfit slays though

darlings, nothing you said made any sense lmao

there's NO way she actually means that

.......

yeah that hurt.

vi and ekko should create a support group called "in denial about powder"

changing the subject, the goggles look so good on her

god PLEASE do not be foreshadowing please

...she's gonna die this season isn't she. i can't handle that, i can't

vi's gonna stop the bullet, right? right?

no??

i love how vi's like, you really brought up my sex life? sad girl hours are over, it's on little sister.

no stop fighting :( WHY are you two fighting each other, there's no reason to do that, you two love each other more than anything come onnn :(((

i love that jayce's actions are affecting the weapons because they're using the same technology. it looks so cool.

sevika you're a freak oh my god

and then it cuts to these three high af

the way the animation and the music work together in this scene... insanely good, i've already rewatched this like 5 times

how many times do i have to tell you to stop hurting each other 😭 vi please stop punching your little sister 💔

my poor little meow meow :(

sidenote but the purple lipstick is ugly

why has no one in universe commented on the fact that her eyes literally changed colour??

so unnecessary. seriously why. im sorry but this kid has no name, she hasn't spoken a single word, we met her an episode ago, but apparently she's important enough to interrupt the fight and come between the two main character? honestly unbelievable. she has no earned this.

the way jinx yelled no when the child was about to shoot her sister i'm actually sobbing

my brother: go ahead caitlyn, you can shoot if you want.

no but actually, it would have been really interesting to see how caitlyn would deal with that. how would she cope with the fact that she killed a child and how she sees jinx as a murderer and now she's one too? And that would have made her and jinx's relationship even more strained (i think vi would forgive her and understand how fucked up the whole situation was). That would have honestly been super interesting to explore. maybe if the show had 3 seasons...

god i feel so bad for vi i just want her to be happy... why can't i hug her? :(

but what was she thinking fighting against her sister like that... smh

mel is too pretty and good for this, leave her out of this thanks

[stillboredbuttrying]

Love between fairy and devil ep6 rewatch

Dongfang Qingcang (doesn't know what sex is) (can't feel love or other emotions by himself for magic reasons): YOU ARE MINE. YOU BELONG TO ME. YOUR BLOOD BELONGS TO ME

Xiao Lanhua (knows what sex is, been trying to bone the God of war for 500years): You look like a very nice escaped convict, but sadly I'm not into bad boys.

Dongfang Qingcang (doesn't understand that Xiao Lanhua thinks he wants to sleep with her) : I WILL KILL ANYONE THAT TRIES TO HURT YOU. I WILL DO EVERYTHING TO MAKE YOU HAPPY

Xiao Lanhua: You are very smooth and romantic but my heart belongs to the hero of the Heaven realm. My dream is to become his waitress :)

Chang Heng (knows what sex is) (thinks he's a tragic hero): Xiao Lanhua is so pure and good, I wish I could marry her! Alas, my brother doesn't allow it :(

Also Chang Heng (doesn't know what gay sex is) (in a painting drinking with Rong Hao): Man, there isn't any place I rather be than here drinking with you. You are my favourite person in the world. Your eyes are so pretty up close

Bonus:

Shang Que (trying his best): Boss don't you think you are taking this orchid thing a bit too seriously? She's dumb as a rock, no need to stress so much

[iris-black13]

In honour of Merlin trending for literally no reason today, I would like to share my theories that I came up with during my recent rewatch. (I'm only up to season 3 right now so there really aren't that many theories yet.)

1. Merlin and Arthur 100% fell in love with each other in season 1, but they aren't aware of it at all.

2. Merlin is so gay. I'm not sure if he knows it or not, but Merlin is not attracted to women. Every time he's seemed interested in a woman, it's because she's been a powerful sorceress or a magical creature. Speaking of Freya; his only real female love interest, what he loves about her is that he sees himself in her. He feels a sense of kinship towards her as someone who is trapped and hunted for something out of her control. I don't think he feels any actual romantic love for her. He loves her, sure. But I think he's confusing romantic love for something else. (But idk I could be wrong.)

3. I don't think the Morgana we got back after her disappearance is the same Morgana we had pre S2E12. I think she probably died and came back wrong. In fact, I think she's a shade. Because otherwise the personality difference is too drastic. Her relationship with Gwen for instance. It makes sense if she didn't forgive Merlin for what he did, but why is she so mean to Gwen?? Gwen was her best friend and maybe even her first love? Morgana was never classist before season 3, but afterwards she acts like Gwen is lesser than and it just doesn't make sense. Anyway that's my in-universe explanation for her terrible shift in character.

4. This is the most important one. Merlin doesn't realize he's in love with Arthur until some time shortly before the season 2 finale. Before the finale, Merlin is happy to cheer on the romance between Arthur and Gwen. Two of his best friends fell in love! Why wouldn't he be happy? Even if they think there's no future for their relationship, he's more than happy to help them get together because Merlin believes in loving who you want to love.

Now, I could go on about how falling in love with Gwen is basically Arthur's way of expressing his repressed feelings for Merlin since Gwen and Merlin are of the same social standing and since Gwen is a woman he can experience the love he could have had with Merlin if it was allowed, but I won't do that. This ain't about him. What's important is that Merlin, in the season 2 finale- knows he's in love with Arthur, and that Arthur can't love him back. After the finale, he's still happy to help his friends in their affections for each other, but his bright goofy smile is gone. It's replaced with this melancholy smile and a hesitant voice.

I'm so serious right now. If you don't believe me, just go rewatch seasons 2 and 3 and see the shift in his demeanor yourself. He actively avoids them when they're interacting in season 3. In- I think it was the changeling episode, at the end, Arthur and Merlin walk into a hallway at the bottom of the staircase. They both see Gwen on the staircase, and when Arthur starts up the stairs, Merlin immediately leaves. It's not a "I'll give them their space" moment. It's a "I can't be here right now" kind of moment. He doesn't even try to stick around to protect Arthur on their date in the episode where Morgana frames Gwen for witchcraft. (and don't even get me started on that episode of my god.) Normally, he would stick around in the shadows to make sure nothing goes wrong and they aren't attacked or anything. It's weird that he doesn't try to stick around!

And oh my God. There are so many moments where Colin Morgan's acting just makes my heart ache. In the crystal caves, Merlin trying to banter with an unconscious Arthur while trying desperately to heal him makes me want to cry. And any time he's encouraging Gwen to follow her heart and be with Arthur just makes me ache. In the "...you still have feelings for him." And the "you like him. He likes you. Isn't that all that really matters?" I just can't.

Honestly, I could go on, but this post is already wordy enough. Thanks for coming to my Ted talk.

[datasoong101]

When I first started watching DS9, I listed each character and my impressions of them here. Now that I've finished the show and had time to sit with it, I'm gonna do that again.

Spoilers under the cut!

Benjamin Sisko:

A truly inspirational character with a beautiful and meaningful arc. Sisko is one of the best examples of a healthy father figure I can think of. He's funny, he's responsible, he's kind, he makes hard choices. His arc as the emissary was remarkable. He went from a reluctant star fleet officer to a transcendent being who's destiny was written before he was born. He's the best.

Jake Sisko:

You got to see him grow from a little kid to a remarkable author. His relationship with his father was beutiful and tragic. I would love to see where he is 10 years after the last season.

Kasidy:

Her character wasn't super detailed, but she seemed like a bad ass. A good partner for Sisko.

Sisko's Dad:

Just felt like including him. He's awsome.

Quark:

I love that little rat bastard freak. I love him and his freak little self to death. He's actually the fucking best you don't get it. His gay ass wanted Odo so bad. His arc was just right, changes in perspective but mostly shenanigans.

Rom:

The silliest and goofiest little guy. He's so damn sweet. Best grand nagus ever.

Nog:

I actually cried over Nog joining Statfleet. He is an incredible person. It's really tragic that he had to see the worst of the war so young. Love him too.

Leeta:

Such a badass.

General Martok:

A cool dude.

Worf:

I honestly didn't like Worf that much in TNG. That changed REAL quick. You get to see so much more of his character in DS9. He's just the best.

Jadzia Dax:

OH MY GOD DAX AGAGAGAGAG I cannot express how much I love her. She was absolutely incredible. Her and Worf were actually the sweetest ever. Her death pissed me the fuck off.

Ezri Dax:

When she came on, I tried not to like her. I failed. She is beutiful cinnamon roll too good for this world.

Keiko:

Wish you got to see more of her. She's awsome.

O' Brien kids:

:3

O'Brien:

I LOVE HIM POOR GUY!!! Him and Julian are the best grumpy sunshine ever.

Julian:

AGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAGAG THE TWINKIEST TWIK WHO EVER TWINKED I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM YOU DON'T GET IT YOU'LL NEVER GET IT!!! He feels so real. His arc is remarkable. From bright eyed "frontier doctor" fresh from Star Fleet Medical to the tragedy of the war and his family and being discovered as genetically modified, his friendships. All of it. He just needed to kiss a lizard.

Garak:

I LOVE THAT TRAGIC ASS HORNY ASS FUCK ASS LIZARD ASS FUCK I LOVE HIM TO DEATH HE JUST NEEDED TO KISS A TWINK.

Kira:

SHE IS SUCH A BADASS. Her character development? Incredible. She just. I don't know. I just love her. She's quite literally hanging on my wall.

Odo:

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHH I LOVE HIM. HE'S JUST SO. AHAHAHAHAHAH. His story is one of the most tragic. I love him and Kira. I cried when he went home. Also him and Quark were fucking.

Kai Winn:

I hated her and then someone changed my mind so I hate her less. Her arc was wild.

Gul Dukat:

FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM FUCK HIM HE'S A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT

Ziyal:

Maybe the most tragic casualty of the occupation and the war. She deserved so much better.

I LOVE DS9 SO FUCKING MUCH ACTUALLY INSANE I LOVE THEM SO MUCH LIKE YOU DON'T GET IT LOVING THEM IS NOT ENOUGH I NEED TO BITE THEM THAT SHOW WAS EQUAL PARTS ME CRYING AND ME LAUGHING I CAN'T WAIT TO REWATCH

[rapha-reads]

IWTV rewatch

Season 1 episode 1 [In Throes of Increasing Wonder...] - part 2/2

- [Louis] "It bears repeating, I did not consider myself a homosexual man at the time" - yeah that was the repression talking. "I ended up embracing my sexuality" - oh did you? That why people still write you as an altar boy?

- [Daniel] "We're not here for me" - not yet, Danny, not yet... Your turn will come.

- [Louis] "I had never let myself to feel emotionally close to anyone, much less a man" - okay, this boy needs a thousand hugs. Who's volunteering? Never mind, outta my way, I'm volunteering.

- [Louis] "You could be a lot of things in New Orleans, but an openly gay Negro man was not one of them" - sadly I'm pretty sure the rule still applies in many parts of the world today. Oh, hey, another social commentary! Love those.

- [Louis] "I vowed never to return again. I shut that night out of my mind and turned my attentions back to life as it was before" - sure Jan. Meanwhile Lestat is premiering the yellow dressing gown of wallowing and depression.

- Aaaand it's been a month. Grace's wedding. She's so pretty. "Altar Boys Come Dancing Everyday For God" - excuse me while I go dying of laughter. But also, hey, y'all ready for Louis to lose all of his societal markers and all of his culture? That's gonna hurt. Another reason why making Louis Black is the best choice ever. There's culture here, there's community, and Louis' about to be cut off from all of that, the music, the dancing, the traditions and rituals. But also, if we consider book canon, the Creole community of NOLA and its ties with voodoo are going to come into focus later on. I don't think Rolin Jones will adapt Merrick, but still, it's there and it makes what happens in Merrick to Louis even more intense when you picture Creole Louis instead of white Louis.

- [Paul] "I think you should get married next" - what did I say about provoking the universe? One way or another everything gets manifested.

- [Paul] "'You think Levi loves her enough? You know, Grace needs a lot of love.' [Louis] 'I do.' [Paul] 'Do you think he's givin' her everything he's got inside of him?' [Louis] 'Mm-mh.'"

This. This little exchange is very, very crucial. Grace ain't the only Du Lac sibling who needs a lot of love. Grace ain't the only Du Lac sibling who needs their partner to give them everything they have. Now consider Lestat: does he love Louis? At this point he loves an idea of Louis, an ideal. Will he come to actually love the true Louis? Yes. Will it be enough? Definitely no. Why? Because he didn't give Louis everything, and that's what Louis needed. Now the other problem, because there is another problem, because the fault definitely does not lie only in Lestat, is that Louis cut himself off from loving, by his own words. Louis doesn't allow himself to love, and thus, doesn't allow himself to be loved. And Lestat, Lestat similarly does not open himself up entirely, therefore does not love truly. *big sigh* Gonna take a good century and more, but we'll get there.

- The shots of Louis and Paul on the roof at sunrise are gorgeous. Light's absolutely gorgeous. Don't know if it was shot on location or in studio, but that whole scene is bathed in warm lights, ethereal light, it's truly gorgeous.

- "'I love you Louis.' 'And I love you too, baby brother'" - exit Paul, pursued by his birdies. Others have written about it better than I (need to find that post), but that's the last thing that Paul says to his brother. Those are the last words Louis says to his most favourite person in the whole wide world. Understandably, that messes him up and he locks the words away deep deep down, buried where they can't hurt anyone else, because in Louis' grief and guilt, it's the words that pushed Paul to jump. Better not to say them and risk the ones he loves. Except you can't live your life and love people locking away the love. You need to get the words out to truly give them power. And that's Louis' downfall after all. He gave some words too much power that didn't need it, shouldn't have that power, and he took the power from some words that should never have lost it.

- [Louis] "That was the last sunrise I ever saw. Perhaps the kindest thing the dark gift has given me. I don't miss the sun, the reminders it carries." - yeah understandable. Do seek out some therapy tho.

- I appreciate how Daniel closes his laptop and follows Louis on the balcony. It shows the depths of his compassion, or even, empathy.

- Oh, hey, social commentary on the world of the 2020s, now. This show keeps on giving. [Louis] "This virus, it turned the world sideways" - yeah, well, perhaps not enough, 'cause look at us four years after/into the pandemic, not a lot has changed, has it? I think it needs a few more turns of the screw.

- [Daniel] "'I get it. I' m gonna die. They're gonna die. But not the vampire.' [Louis] 'The vampire is bored. The human was destroyed.'" - okay Louis you have got to stop hanging out only with Armand, it's not doing good for your psyche.

I love how vampirism corrects the physical aspects (within limits), repairs the broken and bleeding, but can do nothing against the mental illness. Born as a mortal with depression and anxiety? Too bad, that goes on as a vampire, and bad news everyone, now you can't even properly kill yourself! Enjoy an eternity with the parasite in your brain.

- [Mama du Lac] "You must have said something to him, Louis, to make him do that to himself." - we have a contender for Mother of the Year here, guys. Pretty sure she can compete against Gabrielle. The violence of the mother telling her oldest son he's at fault for the youngest's suicide. And now "Paul's in Hell because of you" GREAT GEE THANKS MAMA. I'm gonna go take a swim in the Mississippi.

- [Louis] "Lestat's ambush had disoriented me." - yeah, you have a stalker, baby boy. And depression. And a mother who hates you. And a dead brother. And the weight of being a Black gay man in 1910 New Orleans. That's. That's a looooooot. Oh, and your only friend Miss Lily got Lucy-ed. Babe you need a break and the story hasn't even properly started, lmao.

- "Bless me Father, for I have sinned. Grievously sinned. I'm a drunk, Lord. I'm a liar. I am a thief, Lord. I profit off the miseries of other men, and I do it easy. Drugs, liquor, women. I-I-I-I lure them in and grab what they got, Lord. I take daughters with no homes and I-I put 'em out on the street, Lord, and I lie to myself saying I-I'm giving them a roof and food and dollar bills in they pocket, but I look in the mirror, I know what I am - the big man in the big house, stuffing cotton in my ears so I can't hear their cries. And Lord, I dragged my family into this mess with me. I shame my father. I f- I failed my brother. I lost my mother and sister, and rather than fix it like a man should, Lord, I run like a coward. I run to the bottle. I run to the grift. I run to bad beds. I-I laid down with a man. I laid down with the Devil. And he has roots in me, all his spindly roots in me, and I can't think nothin' anymore but his voice and his words! Please, help me! I am weak! I wanna die!"

Sorry, I needed to put the entire tirade because jesus h christ, ALL THE AWARDS FOR JACOB. The voice quivering. The staccato of the confession, the rhythm of the repetition, "Lord". The crescendo, the way the voice quickens, the way Louis is shivering and spitting out the words as if they're razor blades hurting his throat as he speaks them. This man needs all the awards, now.

And also because this. This is the heart of Louis in the first part of his story. The grief. The powerlessness. The shame. The self-hatred. The religious turmoil. The fact that it's so easy for him to do bad things.

The parallel with Lestat, Lestat who was the pourvoyeur of food for his impoverished family back in the Auvergne, Wolfkiller Lestat who took on his shoulder the responsibility of putting food on his family's table even when his family never had a kind word or gesture for him, even when his family hurt him the most.

And finally, oooh, book spoiler, the "spindly roots" of the Devil/Lestat in him, the tentacles of Amel inside each and every vampire and how Louis was the first one to get free of this influence. Oh, the writers are clever. So clever. And this speech is so brilliantly written. And delivered.

- And finally Lestat the hunter. Lestat the killer. Lestat the monster. The monster with too many emotions.

"This primitive country has picked you clean. It has shackled you in permanent exile. Every room you enter, every hat you're forced to wear - the stern landlord, the deferential businessman, the loyal son - all these roles you conform to and none of them your true nature. What rage you must feel as you choke on your sorrow. The first time I laid eyes on you, your beautiful face, I saw that sorrow. I did not know how it got there or why it was so voluminous. I can take away that sorrow, Louis. I can give you that death you begged your feeble, blind, degenerate, nonexistent god for. But I can do it... joyfully. I can swap this life of shame, swap it out for a Dark Gift and a power you can't begin to imagine. You just have to ask me for it. You just have to nod your beautiful head... and say yes. I love you, Louis. You are loved. I send my love to you, and you send it back round to me. And this circle, this home we barely had a glimpse of... know it frightens me as much as it does you."

Oh, boy, Lords have mercy on me, a second absolutely stunning morceau de bravoure in the span of ten minutes, another epicness of writing and acting and delivering, just as many awards for Sam for heaven's sake, that was phenomenal.

And now onto the content itself. Just as with Louis, this is the heart of Lestat at that point of time, that which explains him - or could explain him, but we have to remember that those are Louis' words about Lestat's words. Louis' version of what Lestat said. But here we see, the loneliness of Lestat, his fear of being alone always. We see his one true big dream, to have a home, to belong, to be a part of something bigger than himself where he'd be seen, he'd be loved, he'd matter. The dream he achieves in the final books of the series, Prince Lestat, the dream that takes him more than two hundred years to reach. The dream he thought, felt, believed was possible alongside Louis. Except neither Lestat nor Louis were ready at this point. Because there is still so much they don't know. About themselves, about vampiric nature, about the world at large. About love and what love is, what love can be, what love should be, what love shouldn't be. Because yes, Lestat does love Louis. Fell first, as we'd say. But fell broken and twisted, didn't understand the nature of this love, didn't realize that you cannot love an ideal, an image, an icon, that you must love a real being with all their flaws and complexities and paradoxes.

And another thing is how at the start, Louis is hang up on his religious upbringing and its trauma, while Lestat rejected it all, or claims that he did. And then the steam inverses, and in the late 20th century (if we go by book canon), Louis's full on atheist and doesn't care anymore about religion (written black on white in the books), while Lestat is going through crisis of faith after crisis of faith (Akasha, the body thief, Memnoch...). They're not traveling the same Devil's road, and their roads are not joining together, not yet, not for a very long time, and all their efforts to make their separate roads one singular one will harm them more than if they hadn't done anything.

part 1 | episode 2 | episode 3 | episode 4 | episode 5 | episode 6 | episode 7