#in just the way that getting memories of lup back feels right to taako. like everything's slotted into place. like she was always there.

[jerreeeeeee]

actually its kind of crazy how little we actually see the starblaster crew interact with each other. like other than tres horny boys and each of the pairs in that trio, and like, arguably lucretia and thb, barry and lup, and lup and taako, most of the relationships between the crew are only a few lines, if anything? like obviously in-universe they're all really close and griffin says that (time enough to grow indescribably close), but there's a lot we don't see. like, taako & barry, for example, have a handful of moments, lines we can point to that show they are really close (you're my family, taako, can i speak frankly?), but as far as actual screentime, there's really very little.

and even those i mentioned before, like, lup has more screentime with barry and taako than with anyone else, there's the whole little legato monologue about her and barry's relationship and she has (comparatively) a lot of scenes with taako, but also, as a character, she's only around for maybe a sixth of the show, so there's just not a lot of time to work with?

and that's not to mention the relationships we can figure were probably present in-universe, but literally never see, like lup & davenport. and on that note, i actually can't think of any other pairs who don't interact at least once, but still, very rarely. like now i'm considering davenport & barry. who we hardly see but there is the fact that barry cast command on him to drink the ichor. it's one line in the show and the implications are never really mentioned but there's a lot of significance to be wrung out of this one tiny interaction. barry condemns lucretia's methods of stealing agency from their family in the service of the greater good, but when he thinks it's best for davenport, does the same on a smaller scale? barry doesn't have the time to try to convince him to drink, he needs davenport back to himself now, because davenport is someone dependable, a leader, someone who barry knows will be capable and decisive and relieve him of the responsibility he's been shouldering by himself? that barry knows davenport won't begrudge his use of the spell, because he'll see it as pragmatic, necessary, assistance, and forgive him for it? none of that is necessarily supported in canon but it can be extrapolated from, again, kind of a throwaway line.

the non-thb crew have presence and are important to the narrative, but most of that comes from thematic significance rather than them as individuals, you know? we hardly see lup and barry and davenport (maybe arguably lucretia too, though we see more of her than them), but we see the echoes of their decisions and their goals and their love for the rest of their family and the way they shape the story.

but actually, even that's not entirely accurate, because as significant as they are in that way, their presence isn't only due to that, they're full characters too. they have personalities and depth and connection, they're not only plot devices. like, maybe griffin needed to explain why lup was missing, and that's why she became a lich, and her needing to be a lich is why she and barry had their romance, but also, if that were all there was to it, the legato monologue wouldn't exist, the best day ever wouldn't exist. those are scenes designed to build lup as a character through her connections to other characters and to the central themes of balance, not to fix plot holes. it's just that all of that character building takes place in a pretty small fraction of the show compared to tres horny boys, who have the entire thing. idk its interesting and impressive how some of the deepest characters and most profound relationships were developed in a very short amount of time

[journalofimprobablethings]

Oh hey I started re-listening to Balance and I had forgotten that when they find the red robe in Wave Echo Cave that Justin asks about the robe's stats and whether he could take it and god can you just imagine if Taako had shown up at the Bureau wearing Lup's robe??

And then I wrote a thing about it.

--

Lucretia thought she was prepared for seeing her brothers again.

She's had time to build up her walls, to steel herself for what she knows will be a painful encounter. She's had a decade now of secrets and privately held regrets and memories, and she's become adept at hiding her emotions, learned how to school all the dismay and sorrow from her expression.

Even so, it takes everything in her to keep her expression neutral when the three of them walk into the room.

Magnus and Merle look in many ways like she expected--though older, ten years older; and she realizes she's never seen them age before. They've been in stasis for a hundred years, always come back each cycle looking exactly the same; but now Merle's wrinkles have deepened, and Magnus has new lines at the corners of his eyes and grey threaded through his hair, even though his body is barely thirty.

The joy and and intense sorrow she feels at the sight of them, with all the changes the past ten years have wrought, is so strong she doesn't think she can hold it inside her.

But what nearly undoes her is when Taako walks in. He looks exactly the same; elves don't age the same way humans do, or even dwarves--but for a moment she thinks--

She knows it's impossible, but for a moment, every signal is telling her brain that the elf in front of her wearing a red robe and carrying a familiar umbrella isn't Taako--it's Lup.

Then she blinks, and her brain recalibrates, and she realizes her mistake.

It's not that she has trouble telling the two apart--after a century living together, the twins lost the ability to fool the others unless they were trying very hard.

But she thinks she could be forgiven for the lapse, because the robe Taako is wearing isn't just any red robe--not some ironic twist, the universe mocking her with echoes.

It's an IPRE robe. Lup's IPRE robe.

And he's holding Lup's umbrastaff, casually slung over his shoulder like it belongs there.

Lucretia has spent any moment she could spare from her search for the Relics trying to find any trace of where Lup might have gone, and has come up empty.

Taako doesn't know what he's lost, hasn't even known to look--but somehow he's succeeded where Lucretia has failed. Clearly, at some point in their recent adventure--

He found Lup.

Or at least, he found Lup's things. What does it mean, that the robe and staff were left somewhere Taako could just pick them up? If Lup left the staff behind, does that mean--

With effort, Lucretia stops her train of thought, forcing herself to take a deep, even breath and push the roil of emotions down deep inside her. Later, she'll be able to sit and think through what this could mean.

For now, she has a part to play.

She straightens her shoulders and smiles, only leaning a little bit extra on her staff as she stands to greet them.

"Welcome, you three. Magnus, Merle, Taako. Killian has told me a lot about you and your...exploits."

She glances over at Killian, who is watching her with a sharp expression. She can't have failed to notice Lucretia's reaction to the robe when Taako walked in. Lucretia wonders what she knows about how Taako got it.

"I wanted to personally thank you for your help in retrieving the Phoenix Fire Gauntlet," she continues. "Thanks to you, an enormous danger has been removed from the world."

Magnus coughs awkwardly. Lucretia knows he's thinking about Phandolin, all those people he failed to save. "Yeah, we uh. We were happy to help."

"Does this thanks come in the form of gold?" Taako asks. "I think retreiving a super magic weapon is worth a reward, right?"

"Or a job? We were told there might be job openings here," Merle adds.

Lucretia laughs a little.

"We'll get to that in a minute," she says. She glances at Killian. "First, I--Taako, I would like to know where you got that robe? It's very--"

"Red," Killian finishes.

Taako looks down at himself. "Oh this thing? Yeah, I picked it up off some skeleton in a cave."

A yawning, empty pit opens up inside Lucretia.

"I figured, he was super dead, so finders keepers." He swoops the ends of the robe a little. "Stylish, right?"

The pit inside Lucretia yawns a little wider.

It's not that she hasn't considered the possibility--probability even--that Lup is dead. And just because her body is dead doesn't mean that she is gone.

But it's the confirmation--and Taako's cavalier description of his sister's bones--that nearly undoes Lucretia for the second time that day.

She grips her staff tight, and forces herself to keep her breathing even. She places one hand behind her back, so that the others can't see the tight fist she's balled it into.

"This was the cave where you first found the gauntlet?"

"Yeah. What about it?"

Lucretia exchanges glances with Killian.

"You all have visited Johann, correct? You've taken the voidfish's ichor?"

"You mean the fish poop?" Taako asks. "Yeah, we drank it. Not my favorite thing ever, I've gotta say."

"Yeah, it was super gross," Magnus puts in.

"Salty," Merle adds. "But I dunno, it had a kinda--"

"Oh my gods, do not--" Taako says.

"I'm just saying, it wasn't the worst thing I've ever tasted."

"Please stop."

Taako pinches the bridge of his nose, and Magnus busts out laughing. Lucretia has to steel herself against another wave of emotion as she watches the three of them banter. The familiarity aches.

She raises her voice a little to be heard over Magnus's laughter. "In that case, you've remembered the Relic Wars."

Magnus sobers instantly.

"The wars were caused by the Grand Relics: a series of extraordinarily powerful magical objects created by a group of magicians that we...refer to...as the Red Robes."

All three of the boys look down at Taako's robe.

"Oh," Merle says.

"Shit," Magnus says.

"Well," Taako says.

"It is very probable that the...the remains you found belonged to a member of that group."

"But that's good though, right?" Magnus says after a moment. "If one of them is dead--that's a good thing? Isn't it? They can't cause any more harm if they're dead."

Lucretia digs a fingernail deep into the palm of the hand behind her back.

"I'm afraid the harm the Grand Relics are capable of will long outlive the Red Robes themselves," she says. "But that's why we're here. We are doing our best to right the wrongs the Red Robes did. To remove the dangers they put into the world with the Relics. And we'd like your help."

"Sounds like a good cause," Merle says. "Does it pay?"

"It does pay," Lucretia says. "Competitively, if I say so myself."

"I'm in," Magnus says.

"Can I ask a quick question?" Taako says.

"Of course," Lucretia says. "I understand if you want more information before--"

"No, no, I'm--as long as the pay is good, I'm all on board," Taako says. "But I wanted to ask--"

He gives the robe a dramatic swish.

"Would it be in bad taste for me to keep the robe? It's just so comfy, you know? Great armor stats."

Taako gives her a shit-eating grin, and Lucretia's head swims for a moment at the image, one part of her brain telling her Lup, it's Lup, while the rest replies no it's not, it's not, she's gone, maybe forever.

She forces a small, rueful smile.

"Well, I can't deny that seeing a red robe around the Bureau regularly might cause some talk, some... discomfort. But we're not in the business of dress codes here. I'll leave it up to you."

"Great!" Taako drawls. "Can't wait to be the fashion talk of the moon!"

And Lucretia can't help but smile genuinely at that--he's still Taako, even after everything.

"Very well." She sets her staff carefully against her chair, consciously relaxes her shoulders. In her imagination, Magnus's hand rests firmly on her shoulder, Merle's a reassuring presence at her hip. The memory of Lup's voice whispers in her mind. You got this, Luce.

"If that's decided, let's get you three up to speed."

She gestures widely to the reception room, putting a little bit of the theatrical flair she learned from Taako into the gesture.

"Welcome to the Bureau of Balance."

[barry-j-blupjeans]

Lucas Miller was at the door when Magnus opened it. He opened his wimpy little mouth to say what was probably some wimpy little words, but Magnus shut the door in his face and went back to the couch, instead.

"Who was it?" Lucretia asked from where she sat amidst her pile of birthday presents. Magnus settled himself down. Across the room, Lup and Taako were throwing wrapping paper at each other. Davenport had his head in his hands in a way that very much reminded Magnus of when they were being too rambunctious on the Starblaster. Both Barry and Merle had somehow managed to fall asleep.

"Uh," Magnus said, side-eyeing Kravitz, who had just gotten hit in the face with a ball of wrapping paper. He leaned in closer to Lucretia, trying not to be overheard because he honestly didn't know what would happen if Kravitz came face to face with Lucas again. Probably something enjoyable, but not the type of enjoyable fit for Lucretia's birthday. "Lucas Miller."

"Oh," Lucretia said. Right on time, he knocked on the door again, although it was rather timid this time. "I'll go-"

"No, no-" Magnus said, already standing back up. "It's your birthday, Creesh, relax."

"But-"

"Already going!" Magnus said. "Magnus rushes out!"

Lucretia let out a bubble of laughter as he hurried out of the room again. This time when he opened the door, Lucas spoke right away.

"Sorry-" he started off with, which was good. His voice was just as nasally and annoying as before, which was not good. "Sorry, I won't be long, I just- Here. For, uhm. For Lucretia."

He thrust a present into Magnus's hands, refusing to meet his eye.

"What's in it?" Magnus asked suspiciously. The package was small and rectangular, with plain brown paper and a dark blue bow. There was a tag on it.

"Well, it's a gift, which means it's kinda a surprise-"

"What's in it, Miller?"

"Watercolors," Lucas admitted, pushing up his glasses. "I, uh- she used to paint, all the time. Made a portrait of me and- and mom and her, so when I saw these in Neverwinter I sorta just- I thought she would like them, y'know? It's, uhm. Well, I just figured, since she's my step-mom, I'd get her someth-"

"That's nice," Magnus said, not really wanting to hear anymore. "Bye."

He shut the door on Lucas's face again, cutting him off halfway through his own goodbye. Magnus lifted to present up, trying to decide if it was actually okay to give to Lucretia or not. Lucas didn't seem like the type to meddle with gifts, even if he was a shitty person. Personally, he didn't know why Lucretia still-

Why Lucretia...

Step-mom?

Magnus opened the door again. Lucas was halfway down the steps.

"Step-mom?" Magnus demanded, marching down after him. Lucas squeaked and nearly tripped down the rest of the steps, hurrying to get to the bottom before Magnus got to him.

"Ye- yeah!" he said. "Step-mom! She never- she never told you?" He seemed to wilt at the idea of that. Magnus, who wasn't the most tactful even with the people he cared about, said,

"Uh, no?" Magnus said. "When did this happen?"

"Well, uhh, a few years ago now, uhm." Lucas was wringing his hands, still looking anywhere besides Magnus. "I thought she woulda told you after, y'know, the memories and things, but I guess not, so it's fine-"

"But your mom is-"

"Yeah," Lucas said tensely.

"Oh," Magnus said, and with that came the realization that he wasn't the only one who had lost his wife in their years alone. He and Barry had talked about the feeling, sometimes, but Lucretia hadn't brought it up at all and- oh. Magnus swallowed.

"I'm gonna go," Lucas said uncomfortably.

"Yeah," Magnus said, finally getting to meet his eyes. Fuck, he hated Lucas Miller but now there were layers to it. Goddamnit. "I'll give this to her."

"Thanks," Lucas said before scurrying down the garden path.

[noodyl-blasstal]

Barry & the twins for 12!

Prompt from @juicywritinghoard Prompts for Fun and Profit which can be found by clicking here.  

_____

Taako reminded Barry of a cat with socks on. He’d forgotten how to exist in his body and was adding pieces to the communal puzzle like his arm was a claw machine. Barry raised his eyebrows at Lup, glanced quickly to Taako, then back again. She grimaced, shrugged, and turned back to poke at the fire. Barry should have anticipated her infatuation with the log burner was going to override everything else this Candlenights. 

Maybe bringing Taako had been a mistake? Barry hadn’t meant to be selfish, but last year he’d missed the twins so much. He’d never leave his Mum here alone… well Marlena wouldn’t be short of people to spend the holiday with, but Barry didn’t get the chance to visit often. He didn’t want to miss out on family time, but his idea of family had changed a lot lately. It wasn’t just him and his Mum any more. The thought of Lup and Taako being on their own didn’t sit right. He knew they tended to just let the day pass them by, but there were so many bad memories associated with it that he thought it would be nice to at least try and create some positive ones. When he made the suggestion Lup had been so excited, Barry immediately knew that Taako would agree to come too - just like Barry, he’d do anything to make sure Lup was happy.

It seemed like everything was going well at first. When they’d arrived Marlena had run down the porch steps and grabbed them all into a hug. She’d met Lup before, but only briefly, and Barry knew she was looking forward to spending time with the people who were so important to him. He talked about them a lot, of course, during their weekly phone conversation; and he talked about Marlena to the twins too. It was nice that they got to meet properly though.

The hand knitted jumpers had been waiting on their bed when they went to put their bags down after the initial hellos. Lup’s was blazing red and Barry’s a deep grey, the candle pattern across them was charmingly wonky. Lup had squeaked in excitement and immediately wrestled her way into it, Barry wasn’t far behind. His Mum made these every Candlenights; he treasured each differently patterned jumper and the cosy feeling of love which emanated from them.

There was no reply when they knocked on Taako’s guest room door on the way downstairs, but they had assumed he needed some time to brush off the journey, unpack, and recharge his social battery. They didn’t expect to find him in the kitchen with Marlena, sleeves of his candle covered purple jumper rolled up to the elbows as he helped her make hot chocolate.

“Barry! Lup!” Marlena swooped round the scrubbed wooden table to hug them both again. “Taako was just telling me about his magical hot chocolate - I said we’d have to make it as well as the Bluejeans recipe and do a taste test.”

“Ooooh, a true battle of the chefs. I’m definitely going to have to abstain from judging though - Twin exemption!” Lup hugged Marlena back as she spoke, and Barry couldn’t help but melt a bit. It was so nice to see all these important people together and getting along. He’d been a bit worried about Taako’s spiky nature, it wasn’t always intentional, but he often left people upset in his wake, then upset himself worrying about it. Everything seemed to be okay though, and he couldn't help but beam.

They’d chatted easily as they made the hot chocolate, and even Taako had admitted that Marlena’s was ‘nearly as good’ as his own (Barry quietly thought that she had him beat, but knew better than to voice that opinion). Then they’d retired to the lounge to do the Candlenights puzzle. Barry had helped Marlena carry out the trays of velvety truffles, the fancy crisps, and the shortbread his Mum only made for special occasions because of how fussy the recipe was. Once they were all settled with candle shaped novelty plates full of goodies and huge mugs of mulled cider, Taako’s strange behaviour had began. Barry didn’t understand it, he’d seemed fine - he’d seemed more than fine. He’d joked with them, shared stories, asked Marlena about baby Barry, life before she’d lived here, and her favourite things to eat. All of them had moved to comfort her when she got misty eyed recounting a story of Barry’s Dad, and they’d laughed together once she’d dabbed the tears from her face and told a story about eight year old Barry proudly telling the audience of a robotics competition that he wanted to be a necromancer when he grew up. 

“Served them right for asking in front of everyone.” Marlena had added. “It’s a lot of pressure to put on someone! ...I bet they didn’t do it again.”

But now? Now Taako looked ready to vacate his body. 

“We need more logs, I’m going to go grab some.” Lup announced, jumping to her feet. “They’re just in the store out the back, right Marlena?” Lup asked, and Marlena nodded. 

“I’ll come with you, there’s a basket for them here to make life a bit easier.” Marlena grabbed a large wicker basket from the cupboard next to the now-depleted stack of logs, and bumped the door shut with her hip. “Follow me, love.” Marlena said, and walked towards the kitchen. Lup followed, pausing quickly to wave at Barry and Taako before disappearing through the door. Taako didn’t wave back, he continued nudging puzzle pieces, staring at his own arm as if confused by it.

“You, ah, you doing okay there bud?” Barry asked, finding it hard to mask the concern in his voice.

Taako glared at him, and Barry found a confusing amount of relief in that. Spiky Taako was more familiar to him than the new dazed version.

“No, Barold.” Taako replied, stressing his name aggressively. “I’m not okay, actually.”

“I’m sorry…” Barry began. “What’s wrong? Is there something I can do to make you feel more comfortabl…”

Taako interrupted before he could finish. “I’m used to being miserable over the holidays, Barold. Lup and I sit on our sofa and remember how fucking awful every Candlenights was growing up, Barold. We order noodles and we bitch about how bad they are, and it’s nice because she’s there, but it’s miserable, Barold.”

Barry didn’t know what to say, so he went with nothing.

“... and now, now, you steal us away, and your Mum’s a fucking delight, and she knits us these jumpers, these jumpers Barold. They’re adorable. We all match. It’s like a big hug and we’ve all got one…” Taako’s voice was getting louder and higher in pitch. This was familiar territory, ranting Taako was less worrying than silent Taako. Barry tried very hard not to smile.

“... so here I am in a lovely jumper, Barold, drinking the best hot chocolate I’ve had in my life, and eating delicious shortbread which I have to steal the recipe for, and we’re doing a godsdamned puzzle, and it’s already the best Candlenights I’ve ever had. What am I supposed to do with that, Barold? What? How exactly am I supposed to process this?” Taako’s lips clamped together and he looked very intently at the ceiling, blinking hard.

Barry didn't feel the urge to smile any more, he wanted to wrap his arms around Taako, or maybe just to fight every shitty relative and foster carer they'd had... “Have, uh, have you considered just enjoying it? Not that it matters if you miss anything, because, well, we can do this every year, there's no pressure, but you know, maybe just try to let yourself have a good time? I love having you here.”

“We can do this every year,” mimicked Taako, glaring at Barry.

“We, we can?” Barry was confused. “Taako, of course we’ll do this every year. You’re part of my family, Candlenights is for family. If you want to be here, you’ll be here. Obviously we won’t force you, but you’re basically my brother at this point.”

Taako glowered at Barry, then looked down and repeated. “Every year.” 

“As long as you want to be here with us, you'll be here with us.” Barry replied firmly.

There was a long moment of silence, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. Taako looked up at Barry and nodded, then reached for some more puzzle pieces, finally looking like he’d met his own hands before.

Lup and Marlena bustled back in, Marlena's basket and Lup’s arms piled high with logs. Lup quickly deposited her load and grabbed the basket. “Oh, and you can just ask for the shortbread recipe, dear. It’s fine.” Marlena patted Taako on the shoulder as she passed his chair to sit down. “I don’t mind sharing it with family.”

[elftwink]

no thoughts only taakitz superhero/villain coffeeshop au. taako’s power is shapeshifting but he has a cool gun from lup. kravitz’s power is Big Fuckin Scythe With Unspecified Abilities. also there was no time to get into it but fantasy starbucks isn’t a real starbucks it’s a borderline illegal unaffiliated bootleg starbucks that taako and lup own. like dumb starbucks was.

By all rights, it should have been a fairly routine night for the Reaper. Go out, stop some crimes, arrive just in time to prevent whatever scheme the Mongoose had cooked up this week, exchange some one liners, make some threats that essentially amounted to ‘same time next week?’, the works. A regular Tuesday as a superhero in Neverwinter.

But Kravitz is tired, and more than a little distracted, so he’s not doing so hot on the one liners, and the Mongoose’s attacks are a little closer than they would normally be. He doesn’t even have a good excuse, it’s not like he’s injured, or that he has anything pressing to think of.

It was just— this morning his barista (who he may or may not have been harbouring a small crush on) had mentioned offhand that he thought the Reaper was ‘probably hot under the stupid all-black getup’, and Kravitz didn’t really know what the protocol was for someone complimenting your alter-ego was.

“I think if you were gonna go for the strong silent type, you had to start doing it months ago. Now it’s just acting like an asshole. Are you mad at me?” the Mongoose cuts into his thoughts, firing off another few missiles from his stupid umbrella gun (Umbrastaff, he called it, although it was a gun and not a staff so Kravitz had no idea why he insisted on calling it that).

“We are literally fighting as we speak,” says Kravitz, playing up the cockney accent, spinning his scythe to deflect the missiles off the blade, sending them ricocheting around the room. He’d said something like ‘how can you tell’ to Taako— the barista (well, they’d been on a first name basis for a few weeks, so, Taako), and he’d said ‘I can just tell’ which was not at all helpful in getting Kravitz through the conversation without saying or doing something to give himself away.

He’d almost given Taako his number, but how was he going to justify that? Hey, it’s me under the all black getup. Do you want to go out sometime? As if.

“You can have fights without being fuckin’ rude,” says the Mongoose, firing off another few rounds, which Kravitz deflects again, advancing on him.

“You’re right, sorry. I’m a bit scattered. Not exactly my A game.” As if to prove his point, the Mongoose easily dodges his next couple swings with the scythe, not even bothering to leave his range.

“Clearly. I mean, normally you’re at least close enough that I can feel the breeze from your sword.”

“It’s not a sword, and you know that.” Kravitz brings down the scythe in the space where the Mongoose was only seconds before, having already backflipped out of the way and landed a few metres back. Show off. Not that Kravitz had room to complain about that. The Mongoose spins to face him again, at least this time seemingly aware of what a close call that was. He’s tense, and his hair, which Kravitz supposes has thus far been hidden underneath his costume, has come somewhat unravelled, black braid falling to the middle of his back.

It seems... familiar?

He doesn’t have time for that right now. Kravitz draws back the scythe, feeling the hum of energy under his fingers, swinging again, and—

“Wait! Time out!” the Mongoose puts up a hand and Kravitz, for who knows what reason, stops his scythe mid-swing. The familiarity sticks, so it’s not just a trick of the light. It takes him a second to place, but the hairstyle... it looks a lot like a certain barista he’d been spending all night thinking about.

He shakes his head, trying to clear it. It’s because he has Taako on the brain, is all. Besides, he has other things to worry about besides seeing his crush in his enemy. Namely the fight currently happening with said enemy. “What? You can’t call a time out.”

“I just did,” says the Mongoose, fishing through his pockets and pulling out several bobby pins, sticking them in his mouth so he can use both hands to fix his hair. Kravitz blinks, still trying to shake off the sense of deja vu, but it won’t quit nagging him. “It’s a whole safety issue to leave long hair down.”

“It’s still in a braid,” retorts Kravitz.

“Somebody never took Foodsafe.” the Mongoose gives him a lopsided grin that Kravitz fucking knows he’s seen before, and suddenly it’s more than just passing familiarity, and how could he possibly have not noticed before, and— the Mongoose finishes putting up his hair, raising an eyebrow at Kravitz and his private crisis. “Alright. Ready—”

“You work at Fantasy Starbucks,” blurts Kravitz, without even thinking about it. The Mongoose stops dead in his tracks, and Kravitz can see his eyes widen even behind the mask. He splutters for a moment, and then seems to find his footing, already ready with a snarky remark.

“Yeah, well— your accent is fake.”

Shit. He’d forgotten. At the only time so far that having it would have been useful too. Still, he pushes it out of his mind; the Mongoose hadn’t denied it. And, well, he’s already solidly derailed this fight, so he might as well get some real confirmation out of it.

“...Taako? It is you, isn’t it?”

“Just who the fuck are y—” The Mongoose— Taako— levels the Umbrastaff at him, and then stops again. “...Kravitz?”

Well. Shit. Again. Kravitz doesn’t bother to affirm that; his silence is more than enough confirmation. One of them has to say or do something, but the seconds stretch on.

“You’re telling me I said all that shit to your face this morning?” says Taako.

“That’s what you’re worried about right now?”

“Uh, yeah—” Taako is backing up now, and they’ve fought enough times that Kravitz knows when the Mongoose is looking for an escape route; Kravitz’s feet still feel glued to the floor, even when Taako reaches the window, fingers already turning to talons around the Umbrastaff. Taako breaks the glass (because of course he does, even though the windows aren’t even fucking locked), breaking eye contact with Kravitz in order to swing his legs through the window before his form changes too much. “Look, this is like, a lot right now, and I— I’m getting the fuck out of here,” he says, and then drops. Whatever had been keeping Kravitz in place, slack jawed, ends as soon as Taako leaves his sight, and he’s moving before he has time to think about it.

“Wait—!” Kravitz runs for the window, but by the time he gets there, the bird clutching the Umbrastaff is nearly out of sight.

Well. That could have gone better.

***

Kravitz doesn’t go for his coffee the next day. Or the next day, either, although the day after that he’s sick of making his own coffee. And frankly, he misses chatting with Taako. Even if the guy was trying to kill him like once a week. He couldn’t just avoid this forever.

Still, the fact that Taako is working cash when he comes in makes him want to turn tail and run back home. He conjures up the memory of yesterday’s shitty coffee and pushes onward. The shop is mostly empty still, so there’s no line.

“The usual?” says Taako, like nothing abnormal has happened.

“Please,” says Kravitz, and then, before he can chicken out entirely, adds, “Uhm, do you have a few minutes?”

“My shift isn’t over until—”

“I’ll cover you,” comes Lup’s voice from the back room; she pokes her head out and gives Taako a look that is clearly significant, but that Kravitz can’t quite puzzle out. “Take five minutes after you’re done making his coffee.”

Taako scowls at her, and she smiles brightly before heading to the back again.

“Okay. I guess I have five minutes. Talk to you after I make your coffee.”

Kravitz nods, and goes to hover around the pickup counter, pretending to be interested in things on his phone. Taako makes his coffee in a ceramic mug, which at least means he doesn’t want Kravitz to get the fuck out as soon as possible, so that’s... something.

Taako slides the finished coffee across the counter, circling around to join Kravitz on the customer side as Kravitz grabs the mug.

“Lup!” he hollers, and then starts walking towards one of the corner booths without checking to see if his sister is headed to cash or if Kravitz is following. Kravitz does, though, sliding himself into the seat opposite Taako, hands wrapped tightly around the mug.

Taako speaks first. “To be honest, I kinda thought you would rat me out.”

“That would be shitty of me, to just sic authorities on your place of work without so much as a warning.”

“So is this the warning?”

“No,” says Kravitz, taking a sip of his coffee, “I... can’t really make coffee without burning it. And this is the only place for miles with tolerable muffins.”

Taako cracks a grin, like Kravitz knew he would. “Flattery will get you nowhere.” His smile falls, and he crosses his arms and leans back. “So. Reaper. Why didn’t you rat me out?”

Why indeed. Kravitz takes another sip of his coffee and thinks for a second, not even sure himself what his explanation will be once he starts talking.

“It didn’t seem... fair. You’re less of a villain and more of a pain in my ass—” Kravitz ignores Taako’s indignant noise and keeps talking, “—and while we always have cause to fight when on the clock, you’re not doing anything that I feel needs to leave the bounds of those... work hours, I guess.”

Taako is trying to pick him apart with his gaze; it’s something he’s been subjected to several times, although normally in costume, and in retrospect it’s difficult to imagine how he spent so long not noticing the Mongoose in Taako.

Whatever Taako is looking for, he must find it, because he relaxes a bit, and shoots him a lazy grin. “Plus, Mongoose related insurance just got rolling and it would be fuckin’ rude to take me out of commission before anyone got to use theirs.”

Kravitz laughs. “Sure.” He’s silent for a second, before adding, “You aren’t planning on revealing my secret identity, are you? Awfully rude of you to double cross me like that.”

“Wha— You didn’t even give me a chance to respond! Maybe I wasn’t!”

“Were you?”

“I was,” admits Taako, not even pretending to look sheepish. Kravitz raises his eyebrows, and Taako shrugs. “Oh, like you didn’t think about revealing my secret identity? And could you imagine the hype if I unmasked the Reaper? I was tempted.” He sighs. “But I figured then you’d have no reason to keep my identity a secret. No way am I risking a backfire like that.”

It sounds callous, but Kravitz has been talking to Taako almost daily for months; at this point, he can pretty reliably pick up on when Taako isn’t being entirely truthful about something.

“Hmm. Then I suppose it’d be in my best interest not to tell you that I wouldn’t reveal your identity even if you revealed mine?”

Taako narrows his eyes. “Why not?”

Kravitz makes a face. “It’s just in poor taste. I just think we all go through all the trouble to hide who we are and use these powers for good— or whatever it is you do— that it’s always going to be such a low blow to reveal who we are. There might be times where it’s necessary, but petty revenge is not one of them.”

Taako’s expression hasn’t changed; if anything, he’s narrowed his eyes more. “God, you are like— fuckin’ irritatingly nice. Fine. I wasn’t going to reveal your identity. That would be fuckin’ annoying to deal with. Plus I’m having fun.”

“Fun?”

“Oh don’t— don’t fucking lie to me. I know you’re having fun out there too. With your stupid accent and one liners and shit.”

“Alright, alright,” says Kravitz, rolling his eyes. “But I’m not supposed to be having fun, so keep it quiet.”

“See, that’s why I market myself as a villain. No dumb rules.” He puts an elbow on the table and leans on his hand. “Why do you have a fake accent anyway?”

Heat rises to Kravitz’s face, and he’s hoping he looks less embarrassed than he feels. “It’s my— I do it so people don’t recognize my voice.”

Taako laughs. “Well, it doesn’t really do that if you immediately stop using it when you realize you might know someone.”

“I was caught off guard!” defends Kravitz. “It’s not every day you find out your nemesis is your barista.”

“Nemesis, huh?” Taako grins. “Didn’t realize it was that serious to you. You know I have other heroes to fight.”

Kravitz rolls his eyes again. “I don’t see how you have the time, considering how often you’re causing trouble for me.”

Taako laughs, and it’s so contagious and the whole conversation is so surreal Kravitz can’t help but laugh too, before they both lapse into a comfortable, if drawn out, silence.

“So, uh,” says Taako eventually, “what now?”

“Well,” says Kravitz, “I want to keep coming in for coffee in the mornings. And I assume the Mongoose will continue with... whatever chaos it is you currently have planned.”

“It’s not chaos,” insists Taako, “I have plans. But yeah. And I assume the Reaper is gonna show up and throw a wrench in those plans?”

“Yes, probably. So we’ll just be enemies by night...” Kravitz trails off, not entirely sure how to refer to their by day relationship. Friends? Potential love interests? Acquaintances? There’s a few seconds of awkward silence before Kravitz gives up entirely.

Taako pulls and pen and a napkin out of his pocket, jotting something down and pushing it towards Kravitz.

“Here’s, uh, here’s my number. If you give me a heads up five minutes before you get here, we can have your coffee ready by the time you walk in. If you’re nice to me out there.”

“I don’t take bribes,” says Kravitz, grabbing the napkin and pulling out his phone to type in the number.

“That wasn’t a bribe, it was a threat. You don’t even wanna know what I’ll do to your coffee if you fuck me up.”

Kravitz doesn’t bother to point out that neither of them have ever caused any extreme bodily harm to one another and instead says, “So you’re asking me to go easy on you? I thought you were having fun.” He sends Taako a ‘hey it’s kravitz’ text before he has time to second guess himself.

“Could you stop poking holes in my threats? You’re harshing my fuckin’ vibe, Krav.” He sounds irritated, but Kravitz can see the smile tugging at his lips as he texts Kravitz a couple of skull emojis. “I should get back to work before my sister kicks my ass,” he says, standing back up. “I’ll see you tonight, nemesis.” Then he turns on his heels and heads back to the counter, saying something to Lup as he walks by. Kravitz watches him disappear into the back room.

Tonight.

Kravitz had better make sure he had hung his cloak up to dry.

[kravkalackin]

Taako stared at the gold coin, holding it up between his fingers and halfheartedly inspecting it. He’d figured out everything he could about it by now, he just didn’t know why. 

As hectic as it had been, he could clearly remember getting it. They were all surrounding Gundren, backing up as the flames grew and Merle tried to calm him down. He barely caught sight of Barry glancing at him, before seeming to come to some split second decision. 

He felt him slip the coin into his hand, and before he could ask if this was really the time, Barry quickly whispered to him. 

“I’ll explain if we survive, but I feel like I trust you.” 

Taako survived, but poor stupid Barold unfortunately didn’t, so there went any hope for an explanation. 

Or at least, that was what he thought. 

It took a while, figuring out the enchantment on the coin. Took even longer figuring out how to essentially rewind the thing. Maybe he should have mentioned it to Magnus or Merle, or hell even to the Director. Barry clearly knew more about what was going on that he let on, it could be some sort of trap. 

But he didn’t tell anyone, and now it felt like he was too deep into it to do it. 

For what was probably the hundredth time, Taako restarted the enchantment and the coin began to speak. 

‘Your name is Barry Bluejeans. You are afraid of the dark. Your very favorite thing to do is swim in very cold water on a very hot day. Your father Gregor died when you were too young to know him and your mother Marlena had soft white hair when you were born and was the most wonderful woman to ever live. You remember them Barry but you have forgotten so much, and right now you feel a dull weight in your chest. It is the weight of a love that redeemed and defined you but you’ve forgotten who that weight belongs to. I’m you, just moments ago, and I remember who that weight belongs to, and I can help you remember too.’ 

It was Barry’s voice undoubtedly, but it didn’t sound like the Barry Taako remembered. It was more tired, sadder, certainly more eloquent. 

The coin continued. 

‘There are certain things I can’t explain, gaps in your memories that until now, you wouldn’t even think to notice are there. Ask yourself, what was the name of the town you grew up in? The city? Don’t look outside, just from memory tell me, what is the color of the sky? You can’t, can you?’

Taako grew up traveling around. He didn’t have a hometown, but the result was still the same. He couldn’t remember where his aunt had lived, what part of faerun his grandfather’s farm had been in. Was it even in Faerun? The color of the sky was blue, but when he closed his eyes and thought there was a moment, a flicker of uncertainty. Had it always been that way? 

‘Barry, there is something blocking these memories. I can’t tell you what, but I can lead you to something that might give us the answers. There is a dwarf heading to a place called Wave Echo Cave. I’ve secured us employment with him as a body guard. Just look and act the part and hopefully no one will notice.’ 

The thing that was blocking memories was the voidfish. Taako knew that, mystery solved, go home everyone. 

But it seemed like something was still missing. 

‘I can’t tell you what the item we’re looking for is, but trust me you’ll know it when you see it. Just be sure not to use it. It’s- the item really isn’t the important part, it’s who should be with it that is.’ 

The hand holding the umbrastaff tightened somewhat as he prepared for the next part. He didn’t know why he always reacted this way, but it felt like someone was stabbing him in the chest. 

‘There are two ways you might find her. If she’s a ghost wearing a long red robe, do whatever she says. Trust her with your life. Believe me, it’s worth it. She’s worth it. If she’s not though, she might not... she won’t know you. She’ll be an elf, and the most beautiful woman you’ve ever seen. If you instantly fall in love that’s a pretty good sign you’re on the right track. Her name is Lup, and if you find her do not let go.’ 

Taako was pretty sure that whoever this person Barry had been looking for was dead. He was pretty sure he stole her umbrella. He said she might be a ghost though, so maybe it wasn’t too much of a problem. Not that it mattered, since Barry was dead too. 

‘Sidenote, if you meet an elf who is almost as beautiful and you instantly trust, even though he might be kind of an asshole? Then you’re probably on the right track.’ 

It didn’t say his name, but Barry had said he trusted him. Taako was a beautiful asshole, so it made sense. 

‘I have one last warning for you Barry, and then you need to get moving. I’ll admit, this last one isn’t going to make a lot of sense, but you need to trust me. If you ever find yourself on the moon, you need to run. Leave, no questions asked. Fight them if you have to, but just get out of there. They cannot be trusted. She cannot be trusted. She’ll promise to help you, that they’re doing something good, that they’re saving this world. It might even seem like it’s everything we’re looking for. Memories returned, but it’s not all of them, it’s not the truth. 

Now, get going. I have some maps and supplies on the desk. Make sure to leave some blood in the pod before you go though, just as a safety measure.’ 

And then it cut out. There wasn’t anything after that, and no explanation of where he had been when this was taking place. It left Taako with far more questions than answers. 

Sighing heavily, Taako restarted the coin again. 

The moon base would be looking for him soon. He should get moving. 

[lilblog-asatreat]

Prompt: Guard on a break; petty; shimmering lilac lake

(Prompt from Roll-A-Prompt Writing Journal Boxed Set)

It's been three months since the IPRE crew escaped the animal planet, and Taako's at his limit. This world they touched down in is completely devoid of civilization again, including talking animals, which means there's virtually nothing to do except study the Light of Creation, which they recovered a few weeks ago, and interact with the only other six people alive on the planet that composed of Taako's crewmates. He's almost always in the small lab with Lup and Barry as they experiment with the Light, and the times they aren't doing that, all Lup and Barry want to do is talk about it. Magnus trains almost nonstop, (seriously, does the dude even sleep?), and it seems like the only times Taako can get away from listening to him practicing his war cry is when Lup and Barry drag him away to the lab to figure out how he came back to life. Merle keeps singing the same damn four Pan hymns while he studies the new plant life offered by the planet. (Not to mention the time Taako walked in on him alone in the bathroom with what he would assume would be a beautiful looking flower if it wasn't wrapped around his... never mind. It was an image that he wanted to burn out of his memory to say the least.) Lucretia won't stop pestering him about talking about his feelings and his past all in the name of getting an accurate account of their mission (and little else to talk about). And Davenport has convinced himself that even after three months of radio silence, that force, the Hunger as Lucretia calls it, is going to come back at any second, so he has to stand guard on the ship in case he has to shoot everyone off into the sky at the drop of a hat.

Taako is sick and tired of everyone's bullshit. He needs a break. Apparently that isn't in the cards for him though because as soon as he steps out onto the deck to try and enjoy the fresh air, Davenport stops him.

"Taako, I was just about to go looking for you. I need you to stand guard out here while I go take a breather. I've been out here for hours, and Lucretia said... I need to decompress, I guess? Anyway, I'll be back shortly."

Suddenly, Taako would rather be anywhere else than on top of the deck.

He rolls his eyes and crosses his arms. "Davenport, my dude. If you were already talking to Lucretia, why didn't you just ask her to stand guard?"

"She wanted to go with Merle and Magnus while they forage for food. We're running low on supplies." Davenport says.

Taako frowns. "Why didn't you send me to go out and forage for food then? That's kind of what I'm best at."

"Because you're really good at sending up flares and showy magic, so you can easily send up a signal to get everyone back on board at a moments notice." Seeing Taako getting angrier, Davenport adds quickly, "They'll be fine. Besides, Merle's been studying the plant life more than you have, so he probably has a better idea of what is edible and what isn't than you do."

That does not, in fact, quell Taako's anger.

"Well thank you for acknowledging I am an elf of many talents at least, but I'll have you know Merle hasn't been so much as uh- studying the plant life as you say- as he has been fucking the plant life. So if you want to eat dirt because he doesn't know what the fuck he's doing, that's fine, but don't complain to me when I can't make anything that tastes acceptable from whatever the fuck they bring back."

"Taako-"

"Just go enjoy your break. I'll be up here waiting for nothing to happen until you come back."

Taako turns his back to him in a huff, and Davenport sighs but doesn't comment. Instead, he makes his way down the plank and onto the beach of the lake they're parked on.

It's a very pretty and calming scene to look at especially while coming down from an argument. The beach is made up of grey-blue sand that seems to get softer the closer it is to the ethereal lilac water that shimmers under the glow of the setting sun. The branches of the trees and other greenery surrounding the lake sway gently in the cool breeze. Taako walks over to the railing, leans against it, and sighs, blowing a stray strand of hair out of his face. He looks down at the small form of his captain sitting cross legged at the edge of the water. He doesn't want to talk to him, but he feels like he should probably at least try to make peace. No one knows what's happening and if they'll ever get back home, and if Taako has to spend the rest of his life with only these people, he might as well not make them hate him. He sighs again before making his way down to the beach.

"Hey," Taako says as he plops down next to him.

Davenport looks up at him with a start. "Taa- I told you to-"

"It's alright my man, I left Lup in charge," Taako lies. "Listen. I'm... sorry... about what I said up there. It was a little petty of me to uh get so upset over being told to guard the ship for a few minutes and not being sent on the foraging mission. But also, Davenport..." He sighs and turns to look at his captain. He has dark circles under his eyes, and his eyes look dead tired with a glimmer of constant worry and stress. Taako feels a pang of guilt for being short with him earlier, but he ignores it. "Look. The Hunger isn't coming. At least not for a while. You've been standing up there 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, and it's accomplishing nothing except making you more stressed than you need to be. And uh, quite frankly, it's also really annoying and stressing me out when you're also pushing that main focus on other people. You need to relax, my dude, before you give yourself, and everyone else, an aneurism."

Davenport turns away from him to stare out at the water. "I guess... I suppose you're right. It's just been so hard not knowing what's going on or what's going to happen to us next... I'm in charge of keeping everyone together and safe and making decisions that's supposed to benefit the team and mission as a whole, and I don't know how I'm supposed to do that when... this is so far out of what I imagined this mission was going to look like."

"Yeah, I don't think being the sole survivors of two apocalypses was part of the job description."

They both laugh a little at that.

"Anyway," Davenport continues, "it's not like y'all have been making it any easier, but I know it's because no one knows how to handle this situation, so I'm not upset. It is slightly annoying listening to Magnus train at all hours of the day and night, but I can talk to him about that later. And Taako, you really need to stop stealing people's stuff and moving it around on them everytime someone annoys you." Taako starts to protest, but Davenport cuts him off at the pass. "I know you're the one taking my stool, and I have caught you hiding Lucretia's notebooks in the kitchen cabinets. It's really petty and annoying, and that shit needs to be kept at a minimum."

Taako laughs. He pulls his knees up to his chest and continues to stare out into the water. "I promise I'll stop doing that if you promise to take breaks more often and stop pushing everyone to be on guard 24/7."

"Deal."

The two of them spend the rest of the evening in comfortable silence, watching the sun sink beyond the horizon and the stars blinking into view, and the bond engine at the back of the Starblaster glows just a little bit brighter as a new bond is formed.

[raineydaywrites]

"You're still mad that we didn't listen to your plan, aren't you?" Taako asked, with a sneer, and Lucretia knew that he was being cruel because of this place, the way that it amped up their aggression, and she needed to keep it under control-

But, well. Taako wasn't the only one being pumped with aggression-inducing drugs.

"Of course I'm mad at you! All of you! Look at what you did!" Lucretia burst, an anger she'd never allowed herself to express before today. "We killed- so many people! And for what? It didn't even work! We tried it for two years and it did nothing! And my plan didn't interfere with it until I reunited the first few relics, so actually, we tried it for over a decade and it didn't do shit! All it did was make the Hunger desperate and angry and get it to consume the only part of it we could actually communicate with!"

She sobbed, the guilt still overwhelming after all these years. "We said we wouldn't sacrifice innocents to stop it. And then we did anyway. What, we just got too tired to think of anything better? All those people- so much of Faerun just- gone because of what we did! What I did! Because you all would rather commit genocide than even consider that my ideas have merit!"

"The barrier plan wasn't ever going to fucking work Lucretia!" Taako screamed back at her.

"I know! I fucking know that, do you seriously still think I'm that stupid?" Lucretia shrieked it, unable to control her own volume anymore. "It would have hurt people, but so would the relics plan! At least the barrier would be quicker, instead of letting the pain and death drag on and on and on forever!"

"It wouldn't have though! It would still have been a slow death, everything falling to pieces, but it would have killed everyone! At least some people survived the Relics!"

"They almost didn't! Those fucking things could have ruined the world so many times. Don't you get that? Your fucking Stone came pretty close, you know! Wasn't the closest though. You three talked a lot of shit about how the Bureau didn't get any of the Relics before you came, but that was mostly because we were so focused on just mitigating the damage! I spend a decade cleaning up your godsdamn mess before it got the chance to kill everyone, and whether or not my original plan would even work isn't the fucking point! The point is that what we did was wrong, and none of you were doing a thing about it!"

"You were 'cleaning up our mess?'" Taako asked, incredulous and dangerous. "You took that on yourself when you wiped our memories! We coulda done that ourselves if we'd've remembered!"

"Could have. But you wouldn't have. Because nobody but me and Lup bothered to pay a damn bit of attention to what our fuck-up was doing to the world."

"We knew what was happening! Of course we paid attention! You and Lup aren't the only 'decent' people in the family, get off your damn high horse. You're just still mad that we wouldn't do your plan, even though it was stupid, and you can't get over yourself enough to even admit it!"

"That's not true!" Lucretia felt her voice going high-pitched enough that she worried she'd just start screeching unintelligibly. "I'm not that fucking arrogant."

"Then why the fuck are you talking about how 'we didn't listen to you,' huh? You think you know best but you don't! You thought it was the right thing to do, I get it, whatever, but you're wrong!"

"Pot, meet kettle! What the fuck was the Relics plan if not you thinking you knew best and being wrong?"

"Okay, yeah, I'm a hypocrite, who gives a shit? At least I can admit that, you're still trying to act like you really did that shit for everyone else. But if that's true, stop dodging the fucking question!”

"Okay! Yes, I'm mad you never considered my plan. You know why?" Lucretia kept talking before Taako could interrupt with some stupid sense of victory. "Because as soon as you actually started to consider my barrier plan for two godsdamn minutes, you figured out the plan that actually got us the win! You came up with the plan to stop the Hunger, and I'm not dismissing that it was your good idea, but you only figured it out because you started to think about the application of my plan! Gods, if you'd done that years ago, we could have solved this mess before we decided that mass murder was a viable option- either Lup and Barry or me. None of us fucking listened to each other, and because of that- because of that, we have the blood of thousands of innocents on our hands. Like, fucking pardon me, but I think that's a justifiable thing to be angry about!"

"Stop it! Stop acting like you have the moral high-ground here! Stop telling me shit I already know! We should have talked, no shit, but you can't act like you're blameless in that! You don't get to be angry about that after what you did!"

"So you get to be angry and I have to shut up and take it, huh?" Lucretia scoffed. She wanted to hit him so bad. "You're allowed to hate me forever, to never forgive me, to think the worst of me and sit on your fucking high horse that you did the good and moral thing of refusing to admit that you fucked up or ever even try to alleviate the suffering you caused, and I'm supposed to feel like a monster? To flagellate myself with guilt and beg your damn forgiveness that I tried- and succeeded- to help people and in the process I hurt your feelings?"

"Don't you ever fucking dismiss Lup like that again, or I'll fucking kill you!" Taako shrieked, quickly reaching out of control levels of anger, and Lucretia felt a momentary flash of guilt over going too far, but it didn't dampen the rage enough to make her stop.

"I'm sorry," Lucretia ground out, past teeth that didn't want to apologize. "For... that. It was too far. And you know that I'm sorry for hurting you. But I'm not going to sit here and beg you to get past my betrayal when you refuse to even admit that we all betrayed each other. When you betrayed me first! I betrayed myself, my morals, to help you guys with your plan because I love you, and it was wrong! I want-" The rage was doing what it always did, turning to crushing sadness and she couldn't stand it, but she also couldn't stop it, tears welling up in her eyes despite herself- "I want to forgive you- to love you again, but- look at the kinds of shit we were willing to do for each other. Maybe the world is better off if we can't stand each other."

Lucretia could see Taako gearing up to say something else, but she wasn't planning to stick around to listen to it. She turned and ran away from him, ignoring the way he called her name furiously behind her.

[iknikblackstonevarrick]

Red Lightning (Part 2)

(Part 1)

---

Honestly, this one was on The Director.

Lup doesn’t know what she was expecting when she told Lup’s brother and friends she had been sent on a secret mission without notice in the dead of night, but Lup could have told her it’d end with something like this.

This being Taako Magnus and Merle set up in the three cells on the wall across from Lup and Pringles after a botched jailbreak attempt, and the Director standing in the hall between them, a look of deep disappointment on her face.

“I really don’t know what I’m going to do with the four of you,” The Director said, looking between the former Reclaimers gravely.

“You could start by letting us out of the pokey?” Taako said like it was obvious.

“And telling us what the hell is going on,” Lup added, glaring at her.

“You- None of you understand the gravity of this situation.”

“Because you haven’t fucking told us the gravity of the situation!” Lup said, exasperated. “You can’t keep going on about how we can’t comprehend your dark purposes or whatever when you haven’t even tried to explain!”

“You want to know what’s going on?” The Director asked, her not-mad-just-disappointed facade cracking into what looked suspiciously like panic. “The- The Grand Relics have the power to destroy the entire world as we know it, and I have been working non-stop for a very long time to make the world safe from -them once and for all. I was so close, and now the only people in the entire world who can help me have decided they’d rather play spy and search for clues than deal with the impending apocalypse!”

“Whoa, whoa,” Magnus said, holding up his hands. “I know the Relics are really devastatingly powerful and all, but no one said anything about the apocalypse.”

“No one’s said a lot of things, lately,” Taako said.

The Director choked on a laugh. Then, she took a deep breath, and straightened herself.

“You’re right,” she started. “This… is one of the several things I have been hiding from you and the other fine people of this organization, for your own good. But if you must know, we have less than a year.”

Even Pringles, sitting in the corner of his cell trying to mind his own business, was left agape at that one.

“The four of you are the only ones in the world who can help me,” The Director continued when she was met with only stunned silence. “If we collect and destroy the three remaining relics before the Midsummer Festival next year, then the world will be safe. Please, whatever you think of me, this world needs your help. I implore you to consider it.”

“Director, that’s real flattering and all, but…” Merle glanced away from her then looked back. “I think you’re giving the other people in the world too little credit!”

“I tried for years to make any of the Reclaimers I sent out work,” she replied, shaking her head, “Nobody could do it. Nobody except the four of you. This is the only option.”

“If I may, Madam Director, I think he means keeping all these secrets,” Magnus chimed in. “We’re great and all, but you’ve gotta admit your sample size is really tiny. Maybe if you let the people of the world know the kind of danger they were in, they would step up to help!”

“You saw what happened when the people of this world knew the danger they were in,” The Director said, turning on him. “They made it worse. They let their hunger for power consume them until there was almost nothing left. No one in the world can be trusted, Magnus. I have to do this by myself.”

“Then do it by yourself,” Taako said, leaning up against his cell wall and checking his nails. “We’re not gonna do your goddamn dirty work for you while you sit up here all high-and-mighty thinking about how you’re the only one who’s good enough to handle the truth.”

The Director’s shoulders fell. He didn’t meet her eyes. She looked from him, back to Magnus, then to Merle, not seeing what she wanted in any of them.

“Lup?” The Director asked, a sliver of hope in her voice.

Lup looked into the Director’s eyes, her face not revealing anything.

“Four.”

The Director blinked, looking behind herself and then back at Lup.

“Forgive me?” The Director prompted. Lup laughed.

“You said there were three relics left to retrieve,” she said, “But there are four. We’ve collected three so far, and we started out with seven, so there’s four.”

“Of course,” The Director said. “I misspoke. You’ll forgive me for getting my numbers off, I’ve had a pretty long day today.”

Lup nodded along as The Director spoke, stopping only when she stopped. She looked her dead in the eye for a long moment. “Unless.”

“Unless…?” The boys spoke in perfect unison.

“There really are only three grand relics left to retrieve, because you have the last one right there!”

She motioned with her eyes to the staff The Director held in her hands. “These shields you keep putting up are pretty impressive. Stupid powerful. I’ve never seen-” she cut herself off and gasped dramatically. “Oh wait, I have seen something like this before!” She rolled her eyes.

“Oh shit,” Magnus said.

“You’re kidding me,” Taako said, narrowing his eyes at The Director.

“How- how dare you,” The Director said, clutching her white oak staff even harder.

“Oh, give me a break,” Lup said, “You go on and on about how people need to resist the temptation of the relics or they need to be erased from existence, but you’ve been using one the entire goddamn time!” She laughed humorlessly. “The audacity. Of you standing there when we gave you the Oculus talking about how ‘relics can’t be used for good’. What is it then? Can the Relics be good, or are you evil?”

The Director stood staring at her with wide eyes, so she continued, “You haven’t even been destroying the relics, have you? You think you’re the only person in the world who can handle their power. I bet you’ve just been fucking stockpiling them while you trick everyone else here into doing exactly what you want. Well not me, Madam Director. Not anymore. ‘Apocalypse’? My ass. I don’t trust a word you say. I don’t see why anyone would.”

And just like that, Lucretia knew she had lost.

Hours later she was in her office, writing. Paving the way for what would be her most excruciating redaction yet. Her hand pulled across the paper as she laid out the lives of two of her best friends, her family, before her.

They haven’t left me any choice, she insisted to herself, but the feeling of dread still welled up in her chest. Magnus and Merle were capable adventurers, but sending them after the final relics alone- into Wonderland, and everything in between then and now- she wanted to have faith in them, but she’s braved that place with only one person by her side, and that person will never see the light of day again.

But I don’t have a choice. The twins were the inciting factor in this pointless revolt. Without them, Magnus and Merle would have no reason to question her story. If it weren’t for the fact Taako knew his sister so well, she might’ve kept all three of them on her side.

Lucretia’s pen stilled. She looked down at the paper- two lives woven so irrevocably in tandem. She reached down and tore it in half.

“So what’s the big plan this time, Ocean?” Taako called out. “Bagging the boys outside sure did turn out great!”

“Hey, I figured out she was in here!” Magnus said. “You wanted to go straight to the Director’s office!”

“We do need to go to the Director’s office,” Lup cut in. “I- I can’t know the specifics, but that’s where she keeps all her secret shit, in a back room off of there. Isn’t that right, Robbie?”

Pringles looked up. He was swaying back and forth, looking at the four of them woozily.

“Does he still have the goods in here?” Merle asked.

"Hey, are you okay?" Lup said, craning her head to look at him even though their cells were next to each other. "Is it- you guys have gotta tell me, is it the Red-Robe-guy again? Does he looks possessed?"

"Don't sound too excited," Taako said.

"I don't want him to be possessed I just- I need to find-" What? "Wait. Where are we?"

"What?" Magnus said.

"Where- I needed to-- I need to find someone, right, that's what I was... thinking... what did I do? Why am I-?"

Lup felt like she was losing her mind, in the most literal sense, her thoughts, her memories, but not her feelings, and this feeling was frustrating and terrifying but above all else, familiar.

"Fuck!" She clutched the sides of her head. More and more of her thoughts were consumed by the static until it felt like it was down to what it was every night, the same vision of blue sky and cracked glass and blood, "No- Please-!"

Something inside her knew this feeling and it was clawing at the inside of her soul trying to stop it from happening.

"Whoa there sparky! I don't think that's safe with your hands on your head," Merle said as the red sparks flew from her hands, arcs of it crackling just above her face, but she was well past recognizing his voice. He was well past remembering her name.

“Taako, what’s going on, is this- this isn’t normal, is it?” Magnus asked, watching the blank look on his face.

“What, being in jail?” Taako shrugged. “Eh.”

Magnus furrowed his brow. “No, Taako, your-” he stopped. “Your….” He looked between the two of them frantically, mirror images with one coming apart at the seams and one completely blank-faced, trying to find the word. “She’s….” These people were his friends. They were friends. They were….

“She’s going to be fine, Magnus.”

His eyes lazily found the figure of a short human woman in an imposing blue-and-white robe. The Director? Yes, that was the Director of the Bureau of Balance, that was his boss.

"You- who..." Lup's eyes narrowed on the other woman.

"It will be easier soon," she said to Lup. "You should lie down." She tapped the white oak staff she held towering above her three times, and the cells holding Magnus, Merle, and Taako swung open.

"You," Lup said through grit teeth, confused and in pain. Her legs gave out after that, but she refused to crawl over to the prison bed.

“Follow me, boys,” The Director said. Taako swept up to her without hesitation, and Merle waddled behind. It was only Magnus who paused, holding his head in his hand.

“I-” He shook his head, looking from Lup’s prone form to the Director. “Help her.”

“I will.”

She took Magnus’s arm, and lead the three of them carefully back to the surface.

[charmandhex]

Fic or Treat!

Or, damn, there really aren’t a lot of fall/Halloween/Thanksgiving seasonal TAZ fics, huh?

Right, but in all seriousness, I wanted to create a TAZ fic rec list for the fall/Halloween season. Per my aforementioned point, some of these are not strictly speaking related to either of those things, but fit in a more tangential spooky/eerie/supernatural way. But these are all authors I’ve read things from and whose writing I enjoy, so I hope you do to. As always, mind the tags, and kudos and comment to support these folks!

So, without further ado, in no particular order (I am literally rolling a d10 for that):

1. The Robots of Maureen Miller by AlwaysAmused ( @simplyaskeleton )

A little goofy, a little angsty, a whole lot of accidental robot murdery. Featuring disaster scientist Maureen Miller and a battalion of equally disastrous robots. What could go wrong? Really, Baines, what could possibly go wrong? Baines? BAINES? I guess you’re just going to have to read this good good fic and find out!

2. dancing in a swirl of golden memories by everqueen ( @everqueen12 )

So you’re on my page, so I’m assuming you like TAZ. Also a fan of Over the Garden Wall? Here’s Kat’s OTGW AU fic for a Taakitz week of old. If you’re not familiar with Kat’s work, this is one unknown I’ll yeet you into myself, because Kat is a delightful author. A is for awesome which is what Kat is, B is for boys lost in the woods, C is for comments are the best, and D is for dear God I don’t know how to end this bit!

3. Rest for the Wicked by BoPeepWithNoSheep (@thisiswhyidonthaveatumblr)

This is one of the ones that is really not fully on with the Halloween theme, but Bo can write the creepy and the unsettling so delightfully well that... well, my list, my rules. So there. It’s good fic! A particularly creepy look at what happens when a new antagonist pops up after the world has been saved and they have a little too much interest in Lucretia. Hm. HM. (Mind the tags!)

4. Draw Me Forth from the Otherside by TaraHarkon

1880s post-Civil War spiritualism and seances with Barry, Lup, Taako, and more? YES. As it’s Tara, you can of course expect that more to include the Wonderland twins. Ghosts and spookiness abound, and as always, Tara is an excellent writer.

5. The Clone in the Back Room by M_Logolepsy (@lonelyjournal-keeper)

So who was left with questions about Garfield growing a Magnus body? Who DIDN’T want those questions answered? Great! Enjoy Mads’s fic about Garfield through the Balance arc, where she absolutely fucking nails just how unnerving all that is and makes you laugh while doing it!

6. A Chill Wind Blowing by DragonWrites

Jen herself calls this one a ghost story, so fair game for this list. What happens when the crew of the Starblaster dies during the century? Is our dear Captain really haunting Barry’s denim-clad ass? How is Jen still the best Davenport writer out there even when she kills him? HA! Like I’m spoiling this good good fic for you!

7. Not Your Usual Round... by Jairephix

Definitely the shortest fic on the list, but Briar setting Wonderland and Haunted Doll Watch on a collision course made me cackle with laughter. Absolutely nails the sibling energy.

8. (I Put a Spell on You) And Now You’re Mine by ceilingfan5 (@ceilingfan5)

Chances are you’ve seen some of Larissa’s shorter work floating around the taz fic tumblr world, and I am here to assure you that her work is always that good! Hello fluffy Halloween Taakitz goodness - this is probably sweeter than  the whole of that Orange Creme Halloween Oreo display in the Fantasy Target!

9. In This Town (We Call Home) by Hoothootmotherf_ckers (@hoothootmotherf-ckers)

Didn’t ship Ren and Noelle before well guess what now you do because of this good good sweet fluffy Halloween filled fic featuring girlfriends Ren and Noelle celebrating their favorite holiday. This fic has the feel of eating candy while cozy under a blanket on the couch watching a Halloween movie while you’ve got a cinnamon pumpkin candle burning and I love it so much.

10. stepping back to golden days by Hoothootmotherf_ckers

Another fall fic from Shell, this one focuses on Magnus and Lucretia and their good good sibling energy and also just absolutely fucking oneshot my bisexual ass with the image of both Magnus and Lucretia in flannel shirts with rolled up sleeves. It’s so very fluffy and you get to run around and see all your favorite characters happy and enjoying nifty fall activities and this one is like wearing that flannel shirt out to go pick a pumpkin and eating local caramel apples and popcorn.

Now go forth and enjoy these good good fics! Stay safe out there, and Happy Halloween!

[comradelup]

64 Lucretia and taako?

Taako’s angry. And he’s angry at that. When he’s angry— when he’s stressed in general, he bakes. Everyone likes cupcakes, right?

He forces himself to unclench his jaw as he’s frosting, focusing on the repetitive motion of swirling it around each one over and over. He blinks and raises his eyebrows, moving his face in order to stretch and relax the muscles.

“What are yo—”

Taako jumps, letting out an involuntary yelp. One of the cupcakes is smudged and imperfect now, and he scowls at it before turning to scowl at the source of the distraction.

Lucretia looks like a deer in headlights. “I-I’m sorry I was just seeing what you were up to I didn’t mean to—”

Taako presses a finger to the tip of her nose, effectively silencing her. Her eyes go crossed as she stares at it.

“It’s all good,” he says simply. He drops his hand and goes back to work, ignoring the messed up one as if it wasn’t even there.

“…Oh,” Lucretia says, “Okay. Is… is everything okay?”

“Yes?” Taako says, hackles rising. He doesn’t need anyone prying, certainly not this nerdy human who barely saw the world before this mission.

Okay edgelord, calm down, Taako tells himself, Luce isn’t the guilty party here.

“I just… you only bake this much when there’s something going on,” Lucretia says, unaware of Taako’s internal monologue. “Usually it’s a party or something, but I remember that giant cake you made when Lup died one cycle.”

It’s been�� about five decades now. Taako’s much older than that, but he’s never spent five decades with a person— besides Lup, that is. Still, it’s a long time. He should’ve guessed that in that time these people would get to know him.

“Yeah. Yeah okay,” Taako says, putting down his tube of frosting and bracing his hands on the countertop. “I’m… kinda goin’ through it right now.”

Lucretia finally moves to sit down in one of the island chairs. She eyes the cupcakes before her but doesn’t take one without permission from him. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No,” Taako says. No way. “I just need to get over it. …This stupid— this is stupid! I don’t need to be jealous, she’s my sister! She’s not gonna fuckin’ drop me because she’s got a boyfriend. I’m being stupid!”

Whoops. Making a promise in one breath and breaking it in the next, way to go Taako. He glares at the counter, at his frosting covered fingers, then up at Lucretia.

“I won’t tell anyone, promise,” she says, which Taako didn’t know he needed to hear. “But I think you should talk to her about it.” That, less so.

“Okay, yeah, I’ll just take advice from you, Only Child,” he says.

“I may have been born an only child but I’ve lived with Magnus for fifty years, I get what having siblings is like,” Lucretia says, with that gently joking tone of hers, “My Cain Instinct has never been better.”

When Taako doesn’t respond, she says, “Do you want coffee? I could go for some.”

He sees the olive branch, in all its caffeinated glory. Usually he’d push it away, snap it in half, even. But this time, he sighs. “Yeah, sure.”

Lucretia smiles as she stands, and Taako manages a small smile back.

<><><>

Raven’s Roost is in a constant state of sunrise. The early morning feel of being awake when no one else is yet defines Magnus’ house, and it’s a strangely good look on him. He’s grown up, with his memory of the century tied with his memory of Julia; Taako’s kind of pissed that she made him mature in a few short years when the six of them couldn’t do that in ten decades. “I guess that proves she’s one hell of a woman,” he said to Magnus, who agreed with a loving look in his eye.

Taako’s been couch surfing. A nomadic childhood plus a career in running away made him permanently restless. He’s long since worked through his jealousy of Barry and Lup’s relationship, but he’s now jealous of their work. Lup gets restless like him, but she can just go out, kick bad guy ass with her husband, and be back in time for dinner.

The reapers can teleport, so Taako’s traveling hasn’t impacted the four of them much. Whenever Taako misses one of them (or all of them…) he just picks up his stone and a portal (or three…) is carved into the air.

Right now, he’s staying at Raven’s Roost. After Wonderland, his legs have been slowly getting better, and he’s finding that he doesn’t need his wheelchair as often as usual. So Magnus is cooking him up a personalized pair of crutches that should get him back on his feet, literally.

There’s just one complication: Lucretia. (At some point she stopped being a sister and started being a complication and Taako’s getting used to it, even if it makes him want to break whatever he’s holding at the moment.) She’s staying in Raven’s Roost too, apparently this is her second home. Whenever she takes a break from her job of rebuilding the world they broke, she comes to be protected by her brother, and Magnus welcomes her with open arms. And of course he takes in Taako at the same time. Magnus is a man with a heart full of love, but a head empty of subtlety.

Taako watches the coffee pot do its thing, the smell of caffeine and drowsiness a perfect accompaniment to the dozens of windows letting in the morning light. Everything is still, and Taako’s too aware, so he notices when footsteps creep quietly into the room.

“Good morning,” she says, voice low. She’s careful not to be loud, but even her tendency to silence speaks volumes.

“Morning,” he says, much less careful. His tired voice cuts through air and stabs ears. His own twitch in annoyance at himself, but not everyone can carry themselves with as much gravitas as her.

He hears Lucretia take in a breath, about to speak, and she sighs. “Taako, I’m sorry.”

She’s said that a lot. They’ve fallen into a pattern of her trying to talk about it (it: an unspoken thing wafting between them like the smell of rotten garbage) and him ignoring her; she still hasn’t stopped trying every so often, but he still hasn’t stopped refusing her.

At his silence, she continues, rambling, “I don’t even know what to say, I know I shouldn’t have done it and I know I was cruel and I’m not asking you to forgive me or even like me but please I just want to talk.”

He doesn’t have to turn to see what she’s doing. Even when she looks and acts different, he can pick up her habits; he knows her too well. She’s probably holding up a hand, trying to hold onto a staff that isn’t there. He perfectly times his mental image of her dropping it in frustration with the sound of her hand colliding with the fabric of her clothes.

When he’s still silent, she says, “Please?”

“Do you want coffee? I could go for some,” he says. He’s already rising up in his floating chair to pull out two mugs, setting them on the counter.

“…I’d love some. Thank you.”

He looks over his shoulder at her as she sits at the island. The kitchen is similar to the one on the Starblaster; seeing as Magnus built the house himself, Taako guesses it isn’t coincidence. She offers him an uneasy smile and he manages a small smile back, unable to make eye contact.

“It’s two sugars, right?” he asks, as if he doesn’t have it memorized.

“Yes,” she says, as if she doesn’t know he has it memorized.

[patriciasage]

promises, promises

Author: Patricia_Sage

Fandom: The Adventure Zone - Balance

Summary: 

Taako made two promises to his sister early on in this seemingly endless mission. Firstly, he isn’t allowed to intentionally cut a cycle short, no matter how much time is left, no matter how much he misses her. Secondly, if she’s gone, he has to take care of Barry.

He isn’t sure what his sister was thinking with the second one. ‘Taako’ and ‘take care of’ are not words that naturally go together for anyone other than Lup. He loves the entire crew, of course he does, but he would rather kill for them than comfort them.

This is the first cycle where Lup is dead and neither Taako nor Barry had gone with her.

posted in full under the break but you can find me on AO3!!

There are two months left in the cycle and Lup is gone. She, Merle, and Davenport were poisoned during a political meeting.

Taako hadn’t been hungry that day. He wishes he would have taken a drink. Magnus hates when he says it, but he prefers to die by her side than live without her. And death would have been much more preferable to watching her choke and spasm in front of him. Helpless.

Lucretia has a lot on her plate now, attempting to negotiate with the bastards who killed them. There was death on both sides, since Taako literally burned the place to the ground. It seems as though they’re on the verge of war – the four remaining crewmembers versus this country’s royal armies.

Taako doesn’t give a shit.

“What’s the fucking point?” he asks Lucretia when she made plans to meet with the royal representative. “This cycle’s gone to Hell; let’s just go.”

“We have two months left,” Lucretia says. “We have a chance to work through this and get the Light. Then they didn’t die in vain.” Her voice cracks. Taako attempts to be gentle with his friend, even though rage flows through him like a roaring stream.

But quiet vitriol escapes his mouth. “Are they even worth saving?”

Lucretia looks at him with bright, brown eyes. “Taako.”

“They killed Merle and Davenport and Lup! And they should have killed me too. And we’re still going to bend over backwards in order to save them? They obviously wouldn’t do the same for us.”

“That’s not how this works,” Lucretia says, quiet and stern. “We don’t decide who is worth saving or not.” She places her dark hand on Taako’s shoulder. “I know you’re hurting, T. And I won’t make you be a part of this. But I’m going to try and get the Light of Creation. And you’re going to make it through these next few months to see her again.”

Taako could see her again right now if he wanted to. But he doesn’t say that. And he doesn’t let himself truly entertain the thought. He promised.

Everyone on the ship is grieving in their own way. Barry becomes entirely reclusive, locking himself in his lab. Magnus cries a lot over the first few days and blames himself for not being at the meeting to protect them, but then he focuses his energy into learning to pilot the Starblaster. Taako attempts to distract his mind from the grief that sits deep in his bones.

Knowing their deaths are temporary doesn’t make it hurt any less.

Magnus makes it his personal mission to take care of Taako, which is very annoying but also helps with his plan for distraction. He sits next to the Magnus as the fighter test-drives the ship. It’s hard to think about your dead sister when your friend is crashing a spaceship into a lake.

But Magnus isn’t only recklessness and aggressive enthusiasm. He’s also soft and sensitive – and fucking manipulative. He tells Taako he needs a hug or someone to keep him company when he sleeps. Taako knows these are partial lies. He knows that Magnus just wants to hold his pieces together, to shield Taako from the nightmares that tear him apart.

Taako travels through the days like molasses. He wants to exist in the bare minimum, avoid the smouldering flame threatening to burn him up. But it’s hard to exist, unfeeling, in a world where he’s always had her at his side. He can’t do anything without thinking of her.

He drinks too much.

It helps a little, but it causes Magnus to make that sad, helpless expression, so Taako hides it as best he can.

He made two promises to his sister early on in this seemingly endless mission. Firstly, he isn’t allowed to intentionally cut a cycle short, no matter how much time is left, no matter how much he misses her. Secondly, if she’s gone, he has to take care of Barry.

Taako isn’t sure what his sister was thinking with the second one. ‘Taako’ and ‘take care of’ are not words that naturally go together for anyone other than Lup. He loves the entire crew, of course he does, but he would rather kill for them than comfort them.

This is the first cycle where Lup is dead and neither Taako nor Barry had gone with her.

Food is always an effective way to build a bridge between two stubborn souls. Taako steps foot into the Starblaster’s kitchen for the first time since the disaster a few weeks ago. Lucretia is a passable cook, so the remaining crew haven’t been suffering too much, but her meals are nothing compared to the twins’ concoctions.

Absolutely everything on this ship reminds Taako of his sister (pretty much every aspect of existence reminds him of his sister), but the kitchen is particularly salient. He stands in the doorway and breathes through it, thankful that no one is around. Lup is the only one who knows him at his core, the only one who’s ever seen his soft, fragile centre. Magnus has been digging closer and closer every cycle with his big hands and even bigger smile. But there’s no one Taako trusts like he trusts Lup.

And she’s gone.

And he made her a promise.

There are so many lakes on this world. Taako had spent most of springtime fishing and filleting, so the freezer is full. He takes out a few cuts of cod, expertly deboned, as well as some salt, pepper, lemon, chili powder, and dill. He starts the rice boiling and thaws the fish with a flick of his wand. The meat hasn’t been frying for too long before Magnus and Lucretia appear at the kitchen table, summoned by the smell. They’re looking at him with an irritating mixture of encouragement and wariness. He ignores them and focuses on cooking. He’s mentally batting away memories and feelings constantly and it’s starting to take a toll.

The kitchen is silent except for the sizzle of fish in the pan and the soft murmur of boiling rice. Taako transmutes some beans into asparagus and tosses that in the pan as well.

“Fucking talk,” he says to the stove.

Magnus startles into conversation. Taako feels his friends’ gazes move away from his back and toward each other. He focuses on their chat even though it’s boring. It’s easier than fighting his heart’s insistent ache.

He avoids looking at their faces while he places their meals in front of them. “Thank you,” Lucretia says softly. Magnus places a big, warm hand on the wizard’s shoulder.

Taako feels his mouth press into a shadow of a smile. He squeezes Magnus’s hand and steps away. “Dig in. I’m gonna bring some to the lab rat.”

Barry is asleep at his desk, drooling on a sketch of one of his prototypes. Taako sets the plate down next to him and watches the smell wake him up. His glasses are askew even when he lifts his head.

There’s an awful moment when he looks at Taako and his face softly lights up. Taako’s stomach sinks, and then Barry comes fully into awareness and looks away. Taako regrets shaving his face his morning and he regrets wearing his hair up the way Lup usually does before bed. He doesn’t blame Barry for the disappointment.

“This is good shit, so you’d better not let it get cold,” Taako says. He leans against the workbench with his arms crossed.

“Smells good,” Barry replies with his characteristic, gruff awkwardness. Taako tries not to fidget. The chill of Lup’s absence is strongest in the kitchen, but it’s swirling around the lab, too. It’s typical to see Lup sprawled on the couch pretty much every evening, chattering while Barry tries and fails to focus on his work.

Barry puts a forkful of rice in his mouth and speaks around it. Gross. “Did you eat already?”

Taako is absentmindedly surprised when he realizes he hasn’t eaten anything except a bite of toast that Magnus practically shoved in his mouth this morning. He curses himself for thinking about it too long and ruining what could have been a perfectly good lie. “Yep, sure did.”

“Taako…” Barry says disapprovingly, lowering his fork.

“Get outta my ass, Barry. I’m, like, a hundred years old, or something.” Age doesn’t mean much to them, anymore. “Don’t treat me like a child.”

“I’m not treating you like a child. I’m treating you like – ” He sighs. “Do you have some left over upstairs?”

“Yeah,” Taako lies. He walks toward the door. “Gonna go eat now, so…enjoy, or whatever.”

Barry rubs his eyes under his glasses. “Thanks, Taako.”

“Shit,” Taako mutters as he climbs the stairs. Why didn’t Lup tell Magnus or Lucretia to take care of Barry? Hell, anyone would do a better job than him.

Taako enters the now empty kitchen and casts Prestidigitation to clean the dishes, but he stops before he can leave for the upper deck. There’s a full plate of food on the table. It’s obvious that Magnus and Lucretia had each put half of their meal onto a clean plate. They’re taking advantage of his inability to throw away food, engrained from his childhood. Taako sighs but sits at the table to eat. He feels more solid when he’s done, but just as empty.

The next day is better.

“Come for a walk,” Taako demands from Barry’s bedroom doorway. Barry yelps and covers his chest with a blanket.

“Taako!”

“Come for a walk!” the elf repeats, leaving the door ajar as he leaves.

Barry joins him on the Starblaster’s lower deck in a few minutes, hair messy but fully clothed. “Where are we going?”

Before Taako has a chance to respond, Magnus rushes in. “Don’t forget your cloak – it’s kinda cold. Oh, hey, Barry. You coming with us?”

“I guess I am.”

“Great!”

Magnus hands Barry his denim jacket and throws Taako’s thicker cloak in his direction. The security officer himself is wearing a wool-lined vest with no sleeves. Taako resists the urge to roll his eyes when he notices.

The men don’t talk a lot as they traverse the path that Magnus and Taako have worn down over the last few weeks. They skip rocks on the surface of the still water. Barry stays far away from the water’s edge. Magnus picks Taako up and pretends he’s about to throw him in. Instead of protesting, Taako looks the man in the eyes with a challenge. “Do it. I fucking dare you, Burnsides.” Magnus freezes and just stands there holding the elf in his arms for a moment. Taako smirks. “That’s what I thought.”

Barry disappears into his lab when they return to the ship, but Taako still considers it a success. After a few days, Barry no longer needs to be woken up; he joins them in the foyer, sleepy but ready, every morning. Lucretia comes, too, when she’s not out negotiating.

Taako cooks when he can.

Sometimes he’s good. Sometimes the air of the kitchen suffocates him. Barry sees him once, standing in the pantry, frozen and overwhelmed. “Hey,” he says. There’s something soft and complex in his expression when Taako whirls around.

“What’s up, my man?” Taako’s voice breaks more than usual. The stiffness of his hands betrays him, too. Barry beckons him out of the pantry. Taako follows quietly as the scientist travels to the Starblaster’s upper deck.

The endless night sky is strangely comforting. There aren’t many constants in their life besides each other, their target, and their enemy. But the sky is always there and ready to take them away.

Barry opens a hatch near the centre of the deck and brings out what looks like a piece from a broken chair. “Ready?” he asks.

“What?”

Barry just nods and then throws the item high into the air. Taako understands when it reaches his highest peak, but he can’t bring himself to take out his wand. The piece of wood falls into a nearby like with a soft splash.

“Oh, sorry,” Barry says awkwardly. “You’re supposed to hit it with a spell –”

“I know what I’m supposed to do, Barry. I’ve lived with her my whole life,” Taako snaps. He takes a breath and tries again. “Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do here, man. But that’s her. She feels things build up inside and needs to let ‘em out in a way she can control. But I- …I’m not full of anything.” He turns to leave. “So, thanks, dude, but this isn’t gonna work for me.”

Barry grabs his wrist. “Taako, wait!” He looks a little helpless. “Then what does work for you? Tell me.”

“I don’t know.”

“Come on.” Barry attempts a smile but he’s shivering a little in the night air. “Like you said to me the other day – you’re over a hundred years old. You know. So, tell me what makes you feel better when you feel like shit so I can help you out.”

“I don’t want your fucking help, Barry.”

“Well, that’s too damn bad!” Barry rarely raises his voice. It echoes across the empty deck and is swallowed by the night sky. “Tell me, Taako.”

He knows the answer will hurt both of them when it leaves his mouth, but he says it anyway. “Being with her.” Barry averts his gaze and Taako feels both sick and triumphant. “Just…being in her company makes me feel like a person again. So. Unless you can do that for me, I think we’re done here.”

Taako stands outside Magnus’s bedroom door for a few minutes. He raises his hand to knock then lowers it again. He spends the night on a nearby dock, listening to the waves lap against the shore and slowly emptying a bottle of rum.

The next morning, they pretend it didn’t happen. They go for their morning walk and let Magnus carry the conversation.

Lucretia gets the Light of Creation against all odds – and just in time. There’s only about two days left in this Cycle. Taako makes her favourite dish, piri piri chicken, and they allow themselves to celebrate with wine and music. It never feels completely right to celebrate, knowing the Hunger is still going to cause a lot of damage, but they need to allow themselves these small successes. The men also feel the need to show appreciation to Lucretia, since she worked tirelessly to save this world while they went for walks and crashed the ship into lakes.

Magnus is dancing with Lucretia in the kitchen and Taako makes a quick exit before the big man can trap him in another embrace. He finds Barry on the couch, lost in thought. He sits down beside him, touching their wine glasses together in a small toast. “We made it,” the wizard says before taking another drink.

“Yeah,” Barry says. They’re both thinking the same thing. They’ll see her again soon.

Barry turns to face him. “Listen, Taako, I’m sorry I was so pushy the other night.”

“Don’t worry about it.”

“It’s just…” Barry sighs. “I promised her I’d take care of you and I –”

“What?” Taako interrupts. They look at each other, incredulous and inquiring. “She made me promise to take care of you, dude.”

Barry smiles and laughs. Taako fumes. As if Barry Bluejeans could take care of him – what was she thinking? “We both did kind of a shit job, didn’t we?” Barry says.

“Hey, without me you would’ve starved to death.”

“Yeah, that’s fair.”

A few days later, Magnus flies the Starblaster through the Hunger’s advancing tendrils, their bodies fragment, and the entire crew materializes in their set places. Before Lup can even take a breath, Taako shoves her hard. “What the fuck?” she sputters. He silences her with a hug.

The IPRE crew puts the past behind them and they settle into a new life on a new world. Barry and Lup go back to their routine of being attached at the hip and stubbornly not talking about their feelings. Lup and Taako cook and practice magic together. Barry and Taako aren’t close, per se, but they tolerate each other in a new, honest and kind way.

It’s worth it to see the smile on Lup’s face.

[kimbertsurprise]

where you land is where i’d like to be

i got sad and wanted to write about boys in love, so this is a very soft very self-indulgent almost 3k. also on ao3 here

Kravitz slips into the back of the auditorium, tugging his gloves off and tucking them into his pocket. He runs a hand down his locs, leaving droplets sticking to his skin. It’s snowing outside. The first snow of the season, which Kravitz probably should find beautiful. But right now it’s just cold and wet, and his nerves are tingling.

The auditorium is warm, though, and Kravitz shakes it off as he steps inside. He has always loved this place. The high, arched ceilings, the red fabric seats – every time he sees it, he’s reminded of the first concert he went to as a boy. So much has changed since then, but the majesty of a theater never will. 

Plus, the voice echoing through the hall doesn’t hurt.

Taako stands on stage, glittering as much as the snow falling outside. He likes to show off for his students, Kravitz knows – a sparkling cape here, a firework there. Today he is gleaming in knee high boots and a billowing white blouse, gold climbing up his ears.

“Wrong,” Taako says as Kravitz steps through the door and settles himself against the wall. “Bond theory has nothing to do with ghosts, are you even trying?” A beam of light shoots from Taako’s finger and into the audience, followed quickly by an “oof” and a round of laughter from the other students. “Bad answers get purple hair. Next!”

Kravitz grins. Taako rarely handles a guest lecture the same way twice, but this feels exactly like him – a bit of mischief, a bit of drama. Another student raises a hand from a few rows down. “Bonds!” he shouts, and Kravitz swallows a laugh.

“Are you kidding?” Taako throws his hands into the air, and gold bracelets sparkle down his arm. The ones Kravitz got him for their anniversary a few months ago. “Did you just answer the question ‘How do bonds interact with the material plane’ with ‘bonds’? If you don’t look like Taako you can’t get away with that, bubbelah.” He paces the stage, scanning across the audience. Until his eyes land on Kravitz leaning against the wall, and he stops.

Kravitz offers a tiny nod and a smile, and Taako’s answering grin lights up his face. 

It hasn’t gotten old yet, the realization that Kravitz can make him smile like that. There are a million versions of Taako’s smile, when he’s willing to use it: half-lifted and smirking, sharp and all teeth, soft and sleepy. It never stops feeling like a miracle when Kravitz is the one to pull them out. 

He never expected to feel like this. He enjoyed his work on the Astral Plane; he knew it was important, and the time alone never bothered him. But Kravitz never expected to feel alive again, not in any real way. Until he met Taako, glowing in pink crystal; until his hands were cracked with clay and an umbrella was trying to attack him. It’s the way Taako’s whole family makes him feel, really. They are a mess and a thorn in his side but they bump against each other so beautifully that Kravitz can’t help but feel grateful to be a part of it.

He was chosen for the promise of his power, once. It doesn’t quite feel real that now he’s chosen for just who he is. 

“How ‘bout you, kemosabe?” Taako continues, pulling Kravitz back from his thoughts and into the warm, crowded hall. Taako’s eyes haven’t left Kravitz, and his smile has an edge of mischief. “Got anything to say about bonds?”

The students are all looking at him. Whispers have started – they shuffle around the hall like blowing leaves. “Is that –” “It’s not, he looks so normal!” “But why would he be here –”

Kravitz grins at the twinkle in Taako’s eye and starts down the aisle. If Taako wants a show, he’ll put on a show. “Whaddyou know about ghosts, guvnah?” he asks, and barely keeps it together as Taako’s face lights with laughter. 

Kravitz is a few steps closer to the stage before Taako manages to control himself enough to respond. “I hear they’re very spooky.”

“That’s a common misconception, that is,” Kravitz replies, now climbing up the stairs. “Ghosts are just like you and me.”

Taako is grinning like a cat. “Is that so?”

“Well,” Kravitz says, dropping the accent and gathering his power, “maybe more like me than you.”

Taako’s burst of laughter is covered by the gasps from the audience as Kravitz’s scythe appears in his hand. The feathers of his robe are a little ruffled around his collar – they always are, when he transforms so quickly like this – but it’s worth it to see the kid in the front row literally fall out of his chair. 

The room roars, whispers turning into shouts. “Did he –” “My mom is going to DIE when she hears this –” “He’s the actual Grim Reaper –”

“Class dismissed!” Taako shouts over the din. “Ask Ren about anything that’s due this week, I have no fucking clue!”

Kravitz keeps his Reaper form as the students straggle away, some glancing over their shoulders as if to see what’s going to happen. It’s only when the last backpack disappears through the door that he sinks back to the desk where Taako is, tucking his scythe back into a pocket realm. “Tough lecture?” 

Taako stacks a few papers and taps them on the desk. “They wouldn’t know genius if it hit them in the face. Or got projected straight into their brains.”

“It must be hard for your school to be full of such amateurs.”

“You have no idea.”

Kravitz steps around the desk and reaches out, skin melting into place over his skeletal form. “Anything I can do?”

Taako hums and touches his fingertips to Kravitz’s. “Maybe I have an idea…”

Kravitz’s lips reform smiling, and are immediately pressed against Taako’s. It’s nice. It’s more than nice, really, still somewhat overwhelming with how wonderful it feels – until Taako pulls back.

“Cold face, yowza.”

“Comes with the territory, I’m afraid.”

“Weren’t you supposed to be getting all warm with love?” Taako’s face, so close to Kravitz’s, scrunches up in discomfort.

“It’s snowing,” Kravitz replies, deadpan, and then smiles as Taako’s uncomfortable expression morphs into disgust.

Taako gets cold, is the thing. He will sacrifice for the sake of fashion, but he is constantly stealing Kravitz’s sweaters and tucking himself into blankets. It’s not a rare occurrence to come home to a couch piled with knitted afghans, Taako barely a lump underneath them. Kravitz would usually open a rift and bring them both home immediately to climb in bed.

But the world is blank and quiet tonight. And, despite the entrance he made, Kravitz has a question to ask.

He brushes a finger down the bracelets and threads his fingers through Taako’s as they chime. “Would you walk with me?”

“Would I –” Taako huffs. “It’s snowing.”

“We covered that already, yes.”

“Taako doesn’t do snow without good reason,” Taako says, and tucks his hands into Kravitz’s pockets. It brings his face pressing hot into Kravitz’s neck.

“It’s a new world to see. You love those, don’t you?”

Taako’s long-suffering sigh sends goosebumps shivering down Kravitz’s neck. “Already seen enough of ‘em, my man, but sure. You’re handsome and you’re asking. Taako’ll freeze his butt off for a walk.”

Kravitz smiles and disentangles himself to help Taako into his coat – long, purple, soft. It was a gift from Lup two Candlenights ago. “It won’t be long.”

“Better not be,” Taako mumbles as they make their way back up the aisle. “Risking my life for a walk in the snow, saved the multiverse and this is what I get…”

It’s a silent cold when they step outside – the kind that makes everything pause, that pockets the world and holds it still. For a few moments, the only sound is the whisper of Taako’s boots kicking snowdrifts aside. 

Taako is the one to break the silence. “Okay, fine. It’s pretty.”

Kravitz hums in agreement without really thinking about it. “Reminds me of home.”

“Of the Astral Plane?”

Kravitz laughs. “Not really – it is cold there, I guess, but no. Of home. It’s one of the few memories I have from before, walking to get water out of the well before it froze over.”

Taako is quiet for a moment. Then he finally says, “That sounds shitty, my dude, gotta be honest.”

Kravitz huffs a laugh. “It wasn’t completely. I remember hot chocolate when I got back.”

Taako tucks himself more comfortably against Kravitz’s arm and kicks at another snow drift. “Must’ve been nice, coming back to a family.”

“Better than most things,” Kravitz replies quietly. Taako doesn’t often mention his time before the Institute. Occasionally he drops a small comment or a hint – always sad. Kravitz’s heart, old as it is, twinges to hear them. But as much as he wants to, he knows to let them go unremarked. 

And, well, it’s not the perfect segue… but if he doesn’t say something now he’ll lose his nerve. “Taako?”

Taako pauses to look at him. There’s a glow over his face, cast by one of the new streetlights brought on by Lucas’s world-stealing. It paints the panes of his cheeks in bright gold. The shadows under his eyes look more pronounced. He is so beautiful Kravitz feels his heart stop.

“What do you think of making us a family? You and me.” The way Taako’s ears flick back makes Kravitz nervous, but he’s started now and he can’t stop. “I know you have Lup already and I would never want to intrude on that, ever, and Barry and Magnus and Merle – everyone that loves you so much and knows you so well, but I –” Kravitz pulls in a deep breath, trying to get air into his long-dead lungs. “I’d like to be your family too, I think. If you’ll have me. If you’re interested.”

Taako blinks. And is quiet for long enough that Kravitz feels his heart spiral down into his stomach. It’s too much. This was too much, too soon, and Kravitz is suddenly adding, “It’s okay if you’re not, though. I love things just the way they are, I love you, and I wouldn't –”

“Krav.” 

Kravitz stops his messy, stumbling mouth. And Taako continues, tilting his head to the side, “What are you asking, exactly?”

In for a penny, in for a pound, they say. So as frosted air puffs from his mouth, Kravtiz bends down to one knee. The cold barely registers; he’s used to it, after all.

“I… Taako, I love you. I can’t imagine my existence without you, which is silly because I’ve been around a very long time and –” he takes another breath and watches it spiral out around him, pointedly looking everywhere but up. “I know nothing has been traditional between us, and I love that. I love you, did I say that already? And I was hoping that maybe you’d want to, well, somewhat untraditionally...” the velvet box is out of his pocket, popped open by numb fingers that have nothing to do with the weather. “Marry me?”

At the last words, Kravitz finally manages to lift his eyes enough to see Taako’s face. His eyes are wide, and Kravitz can’t tell if the light in them is reflection or tears. “Love?” he asks, and starts to get up. “Did I – oh, Taako, I didn’t mean to make you cry –”

“You are so dumb,” Taako interrupts, voice high, and then Kravitz’s mouth is full of his hair as Taako darts forward into a hug.

“Oh,” Kravitz says. And then, “Is that a yes?”

Taako pulls back and Kravitz feels all the places he’s missing as the cold hits his cheek. “Is that a – fuck, Bones, are you kidding? Gimme the thing –”

Taako’s hands are fumbling, and Kravitz is too lost to recognize what to do for a moment. “The – oh, the ring, I –” He opens the box again from where it is tucked in his hand and Taako lets out a shout of laughter. 

“You didn’t –” Taako says delightedly, tugging the ring out of its cushion. 

“I thought it would be appropriate,” Kravitz says, smiling a bit sheepishly. The pink stone glints in the streetlight, tourmaline cut and shining like a star. Maybe he should be embarrassed by the gesture. But Kravitz can’t feel anything but light and relief and such deep, impossible joy. He feels like he could fly. He watches Taako slip the ring on his finger and his body feels incandescent.

Until Taako laughs, “Uh, babe? Was gonna give you a shot at these lips but that’s tough when you’re ballin out.”

And Kravitz realizes he’s lost his physical form, now floating in front of Taako in an orb of light. 

Immediately, he begins the process of stitching his body back together, building hands and eyes and hair. His heart, when he comes to, is pounding in a way it hasn’t since he was alive. “Sorry,” he says breathlessly, and then can’t get anything else out before Taako is kissing him.

“You are such a dork,” Taako mumbles after a minute, their faces still pressed together.

“Yes,” Kravitz agrees, catching Taako’s lips again.

“Can’t believe you got me a pink crystal ring, that is so tacky.”

“It is.” Kravitz presses a kiss to Taako’s nose, his eyes, his cheeks.

“Lup is going to lose her mind.”

“She is, I know.”

“You turned into a light ball! What the fuck!”

“That was… embarrassing, I admit.”

“Krav?” Taako is flushed, his eyes bright. Hair is falling out of his cap and brushing his cheeks, and the streetlight makes it shine a bright, burnished gold. “You’re kind of perfect.”

Kravitz lifts their hands together, bundles Taako’s up into his, and presses a kiss to his gloves. Everything is warm. Everything feels like sunlight. “You too, love.”

“Natch, Taako’s the best,” Taako replies, but his eyes are gleaming and he threads his hand through Kravitz’s. 

Snow flutters down around them. Kravitz can’t help it – he runs his thumb, again and again, over the stone under Taako’s glove. 

Their wedding will be a sensation, a show – or it will be nothing, an easy dinner, just for them. Taako will surprise him, he always does. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is quieter – the breakfasts and the late nights and the debates over scrolls to watch. All the spaces in between, the heartbeats he can now count. The soft warmth of feeling that this family is his future.

With Taako’s hand in his and snow falling light and buttery around them, Kravitz takes a breath and lets himself finally settle into the feeling of home.

[barry-j-blupjeans]

42 with the twins?

42. “You’re not alone anymore”

((50 ways to say "I love you" prompts here - send some in!!))

--

As much as Taako liked to pretend, he really did care about the stupid bozos he called his friends. And now that they all had their memories back, it was a little harder to hide behind the "I don't care about you at all" facade. Well, with most of them at least, verdicts still out on how he feels about Lucretia.

But he cared. And if he couldn't hide it anymore, he could at least try to care when fewer people are looking. Like when everyone's asleep.

Which is where Taako's problem lies right now.

It's not like he wants to be obsessively checking everyone's room and making sure they're still, y'know, breathing and there. But Davenport hadn't done it since the Starblaster and Magnus had stopped doing it once they got their memories back, so someone had to be on night duty, and if none of them were gonna step up, then Taako might as well.

Sometimes, as hard as this seems, it's easy to forget he has a lich sister who doesn't sleep and would definitely protect them throughout the night. Sometimes, it's really easy to remember, because she's sitting you down on the couch and stopping you from poking your head into Barry's room for the sixth time that night.

"You're gonna turn into Davenport at this point," Lup said. Taako sank into the couch cushions and didn't look at her. "Are you worried about everyone, or like, just creepin' around for fun?"

"For fun," Taako said pathetically. Lup ran a ghostly hand through his hand and he shivered.

"Yeah, okay," she said, not believing him at all. "Taako you're... you're not alone anymore. No one's gonna leave without telling you."

"That's rich coming from you," Taako sniped before he could stop himself. The hand in his hair paused. He tried, "Sorry."

"No," Lup said, voice wobbling a little bit. "I kinda deserve that, I get it. I was, uh, pretty foolhardy for a bit there. I could have talked it over with someone and I didn't and that's a big mistake on my part. But I've had like, a billion years alone to think about it and how stupid it was, so I can promise you I'm never gonna do that again. And if I see anyone else trying to pull that shit, I'm gonna step in there, too."

"I missed you a lot," Taako whispered, pulling his legs up onto the couch, suddenly feeling too exposed. "And that's stupid 'cus you were right there-"

"You didn't know," Lup said. She moved her hand to his shoulder and then wrapped him in a weird sort of hug. It kind of felt like stepping into a sauna, except less sticky. "We've got like, a lotta shit to work through, but I"m not gonna let you do it alone, okay? You're not gonna lose me again."

"Good," Taako said, wiping at his eyes. Lup pulled back and he took a deep breath in, rubbing his arm where she had been. "Can you check on everyone if I go to bed? 'Cus I'm like, dead tired right now."

"I will," Lup said. "I'll keep track of how many times Merle farts in his sleep if you want."

"Why would I want that?" Taako asked, horrified. He swatted her away but Lup just swept him up in another big hug instead.

[anistarrose]

inequalities (ao3)

for @taznovembercelebration​ Day 29: Lost. picks up from Lucretia’s point of view, right after Magnus sees her feed the journals to Fisher.

*

“I love you, Magnus, I love all of you. I’m sorry —” She doesn’t know if he can hear her; she doesn’t know what it feels like for him, for any of them, to lose to much to the static all at once. “It’ll be over soon —”

She eases Magnus, her brother, over to the bed, and he sinks onto it with such a dazed look in his eyes. It’s a look she hasn’t seen from him since the last few days she saw him alive on the mushroom planet, battling a spore infection from within — it broke her heart to see him go back then, and it breaks her even worse this time, like snapping a bone that didn’t heal back as strong as it should have.

But it’s temporary this time too, she repeats to herself. He’ll be back, she’s bring him back in a safer world.

“You’ll — you’ll feel so much better when you wake up,” she chokes out, casting Sleep. “Like this was… all just a bad dream. I’ll find you somewhere to stay, I’ll — I’ll fix everything.”

His eyelids droop, bringing peace to confused eyes, while the corners of his mouth tilt to form a peaceful smile. He clings to a pillow in one arm, and to something small and wooden in the other — one last duck carving, carefully painted dark brown and crimson red with a little silver pair of glasses.

“I’ll be — I’ll be right back. I swear,” Lucretia promises, averting her gaze. “Sleep tight, Magnus.”

*

She makes haste towards the Starblaster’s deck, because she knows Barry had been out there all morning, and she can’t bear the thought of him getting dizzy and falling. But when she flings open the door, she sees only Taako — alone and on his knees, frightened eyes flitting up to see who just burst onto the deck with such urgency.

“W-who are you?” he stammers, and Lucretia’s heart lurches. He’s being so much more vulnerable than she’d ever imagine Taako to be towards a stranger — but there’s still something guarded about his expression, something about the way his ears and lower lip quiver in place. Something guilty.

Her eyes drift to the swath of ground that Taako had been fixated on, and instantly, she sees what’s vexing him. Beneath the deck’s railing lie a scant few drops of blood, still wet and unoxidized — but lacking an obvious source, because Taako’s unscathed.

The absent wound may not have been fatal; there’s no way for Lucretia to tell. But there’s no way for Taako to tell either, and he’s smart enough to pin himself as the culprit even if he can’t remember the deed.

“Did I… hurt someone?” he asks. “Is that — is that why you’re crying?”

“No,” she lies, suddenly all-too-aware aware of the tears trickling down her face as she kneels, taking Taako’s head in her hands. “No, you didn’t hurt anyone, Taako. You’d never want that, would you?” She knows he didn’t want to hurt anyone with the Philosopher’s Stone, she knows he’d never want to hurt Barry —

“I don’t know,” Taako mumbles. “I don’t know what I want. I — I’m lost.”

He wipes the blood with a flick of his hand, smearing red across the pristine white deck. “And I think… I might be desperate. I don’t know what I did to wind up here, but… I don’t think I had much left to lose.”

Lucretia doesn’t know what to say, what she can say. After all, as she knows better than anyone — not wanting to hurt someone doesn’t mean you won’t do it anyway.

If Taako started this day with little left to lose, is he ending it with even less?

*

Merle and Davenport are on their feet — or rather, upon closer inspection, Merle’s on his feet with Davenport’s limp arm braced over his shoulders, and Lucretia’s stomach plummets the moment she realizes as much.

“Oh, thank Pan!” Merle exclaims. “I dunno how I got on your spaceship, lady, but this guy here needs help!”

“I’m Davenport,” Davenport blurts out, and for some reason, Merle flinches.

“You — you look competent. Gods, I hope you’re competent,” he tells Lucretia, eyes darting around the room with no apparent goal. “I just, I — I crossed paths with this guy, uh, somewhere — but he’s real upset about something and I just don’t know what! Is he gonna be okay? Do you know what happened to him?”

“I’m Davenport,” Davenport repeats, twitching and tugging at the collar of his shirt. Sweat is beading on his face, far worse than it had Magnus’s or Taako’s or Merle’s. “I’m Davenport.”

“There’s no need to worry,” Lucretia manages, well aware that the hitch in her voice must make her promise hard to believe. “You’re safe. I’ll take care of everything for you —” So you don’t have to live in the shadow of the Hunger any longer; so you don’t have to live with the guilt and the heartache of all the failures and losses, until I can make sure it’ll never have to happen again —

“I’m Davenport,” Davenport echoes. “Dav-en-port. Davenport. Davenport.”

“I — I was gonna say,” Merle stammers, “that I think that’s all he can say —”

“Davenport!!” his captain cries, flinging scattered teardrops to the floor with a jerk of his head, and Lucretia is positive that he’d meant to shout Help!

“I-I-I’m sorry,” she whispers, “I’m so sorry, Captain —”

She falls to her knees, to Davenport and Merle’s height, wrapping her arms around them and burying her face in Davenport’s crimson sweater to muffle her sobs. “I didn’t know — I didn’t mean to — I didn’t think it would —”

Her once-infinite words fail her, as if she’s inadvertently but karmically stripped them away from herself, too. When she’d passed the point of no return, feeding the first journal — or even earlier, when she’d first capitulated to the thought that Lup might not be coming back — she’d known, in essence, what she was doing… but she’d never been prepared for how increasingly horrible, how incomparable, how unequal each new loss would be.

It had been Lup first, of course — undisputed heart of the team, leaving and plunging the rest into first denial, then unrest, then despair. Then Magnus, rushing in at just the wrong moment to see what Lucretia had done; to see Fisher, who was more of a child than a pet to him, as the centerpiece of the betrayal. Magnus, looking at her in the eyes and clearly not seeing anything familiar, except perhaps a resemblance to his lovingly carved duck.

Taako, a shell holding nothing but guilt and an empty heart — still sharp enough to know he’d done something awful, but too numb to know if he regretted it. Barry, either dead and despising her, or alive and amnesiac with no idea where to turn for help. There’s no guessing how badly Fisher can affect him, because he’d been with the Institute the second longest after…

Davenport, clearly aware he should know and be able to say so much more. Clinging to just three syllables, clinging to Merle — Merle, so preoccupied with entreating one total stranger to help a second that he’s hardly acknowledging the holes in his own memories. Merle, who is still friends with everyone by default; Merle, who one could only opt out of being friends with, and only with considerable effort.

Lucretia had spent so much time, scrawled so many addendums and redactions, to conclude that even if these losses ached, they should at least be equal. She’d miscalculated terribly, and gone into each goodbye unprepared.

Now, all she can do is scrape together what elements of her plan remain undisrupted, and make sure that each and every sacrifice her family has made — or had made for them — will be worth it.

[overdramatic-queer-antagonist]

I really love thinking about the repercussions of what happened to the 7 Birds so I wanted to write a Thing^tm. Sorry if this sucks, I have no memory of writing half of it. 

Taako: He’s constantly writing the names of his crew down any chance he gets. If you give Taako a piece of paper eventually you’ll see him writing, Lup, Barry, Lucretia, Merle, Magnus, Davenport. The word “who?” haunts him. He doesn’t like heights. ESPECIALLY when it’s just him and Barry. He always leaves KrebStar at home when he visits Barry and Lup. They pretend not to notice, they do. He hates the smell of garlic and berries. He hasn't made chicken since that day. Everyone ends up in therapy but Taako endures strenuous physical therapy. Fuck that washing machine dudes. Sometimes he forgets he’s even wearing glamour. Kravitz once walked into a room to find Taako standing over shards of glass, he looked terrified. It takes a long time for him to stop worrying when he cooks for his friends, it takes even longer for him to stay calm when his friends get sick. He’d never say it aloud but he’s so grateful that his sister is already dead. She can’t get sick. He, Merle, and Davenport go hiking every summer. He used to pick up pretty rocks at the side of the trail. He doesn't do that anymore.

Lup: She’s deathly claustrophobic. She doesn’t like being unable to speak, or hear, or see. One time she did one of those sensory deprivation tank things with Lucretia. She came out ten minutes in and spent the rest of the time in the lobby, waiting for Lucretia, trying not to cry. She doesn’t let people walk behind her. One time, on a reaper mission, Kravitz tried to get her attention by poking her in the back with the blunt part of his scythe. She nearly killed him with a sixth level fireball. If she thinks about it too long, she can still feel the knife piercing her, she can feel the poison burning through her veins.

 She doesn’t like it when Barry gets near fire. If Lup goes to an event wearing gloves, they’re off before she leaves the house.

Barry: Barry’s scared of the dark. He’s always been scared of the dark but now he can hardly take it. When a reaper mission takes them into a cave Kravitz tries to give him an advance. He holds onto Lup the entire time. He doesn’t like gold coins. Usually, it’s not too bad if he doesn’t think about it, but one time he and Magnus were out and Magnus owed him a GP. He sat outside the bar they were at just staring at it. Later that night, Magnus came out worried. What he said was, “Barry? It’s getting dark.” But what Barry heard was, “Your name is Barry Bluejeans and you're afraid of the dark” He had to lean on Magnus walking home that night. He used to be a pretty chill guy when it came to death. He accepted that it was just a thing that happened. Now he’s terrified of it. When fantasy Wheel of Fortune started, The Birds decided to check it out. It didn’t stay on for more than 5 minutes. Lucas’s school has a big bell that rings at noon each day. The first time Barry did a lecture there and the bell rang, he walked off of campus without another word.

Magnus: He always has a vase of lavenders in his home. He would never admit it but sometimes he just closes his eyes and takes the smell in. If he tries hard enough it almost feels like he’s in the Hammer & Tongs. Sometimes, when he’s home alone, he swears to Istus that he can hear Julia laughing, calling him for him to check out a project. There’s never anything there when he follows the noise. A few years after The Day of Story and Song, Magnus took Angus to see the races in Goldcliff. They were in a VIP spectators box (one of the perks of being friends with the owners) and when the race started, along with the normal explosive sounds of the battlewagons peeling off, the box shook. Magnus grabbed Angus and tried to shield him from- nothing. He had to get some air. Lord Artemis Sterling invited him to dinner once. He had these fancy, gold, chalices. Magnus didn’t drink a thing.

Lucretia: She used to be the most reserved of the Birds now she’s almost clingy, she doesn’t do alone time anymore. One time Taako caught her staring at her face in a mirror. He sighed and dropped his glamour. He leaned against her and whispered, “You’re still the second-best looking, don’t worry.” She leaves excessive reminders that would be infuriating if the others didn’t get it. She keeps a scrapbook (something that she would never admit too because the only thing lamer than keeping a diary is keeping a scrapbook) just in case. Barry found it once. She was mortified but he just quietly flipped through it, smiling as he did. The Birds have a strict “no staff unless it looks like something else” policy because prolonged exposure, even if you can resist the thrall, to a Grand Relic is no joke.

Merle: It might be silly but, he doesn’t really like getting handed things. He’s moved on from the incident itself, he forgave Kravitz the moment he remembered how too but… The idea of someone being able to do it again makes him sick. The name John became taboo, even more so around Merle. Merle hates that. He likes the name John. If he was young enough to have another kid, he’d probably name them John just to spite those people. He and Dav had to find a new game to play. Dav wasn’t even finished suggesting chess before Merle shut down the idea. It just didn’t feel right. There’s a rumor around Bottlenose Cove about the Eral. They say he talks to himself as he watches the sunset. When confronted with this, Merle just laughs and says it’s just his way of de-stressing. He checks in on Sloane and Hurley constantly. They hold no grudges, of course, but Merle doesn’t think he’ll ever fully be able to forgive that mistake.

Davenport: Nobody really calls him that anymore, per his request. Usually, it’s Captain, Merle and his kids call him Dav, and then there’s Magnus’s ridiculous nickname, but he doesn’t mind what people call him as long as it’s not that. He says it’s like saying a word so many times it loses its meaning. One time Angus asked, very politely mind you, why Dav didn’t celebrate his birthday. He never did get an answer but that told him all he needed. Let’s just say that Fantasy Euchre (Yooker) lost its charm. His Grand Relic didn’t change his mannerisms. A fool might think that he doesn’t care about the casualties but it’s quite the opposite. He feels like feeling remorse for mistakes that he had no control over would be disrespectful to his victims. Instead he and Lord Artemis Sterling arrange for the day the Birds were separated (Cap’nport’s birthday) to be designated as a day of remembrance for The Grand Relics’ victims.