#in fact the opposite was true! they were asking people to justify if they couldnt commit to 40hr weeks

[gontagokuhara]

only motivation to write when its late at night and i need to go to bed so i can wake up tomorrow and do JOB

[aspiringspeaker-blog]

Came out like a warrior"

Being from a partially conservative family,i always made my mind i would marry a man who matches my mentallity,the one who understands me MOREOVER who understands what and who a woman is and how and why she deserves to be treated!

Partially in the sense i came from a family who encourage girls for education and even raised us strong enough that we stand and earn no less than any successful man but also a family who opposed love marriages,modern short and open dressing and only sometimes told us about how a girl is different from a boy and how she should behave differently.

I wont ever deny the fact that i come from a happiest family,a family where i was never made felt that i cant have anything and also only the elder generation which includes all the aunts and uncles and older people who were into these against love marriages and decent clothing thing otherwise everybody else was cool!

So ya obviously its 2017 and no girl would love the fact their parents are not acceptable about nightouts,late night parties or even meetups,love marriages and modern clothing ALSO whenever we try to make them understand that its normal they will humorously cut the conversation saying " o ya do anything after you are married ,till then you are our responsibility so co-operate"

Anyways,so this sentence convinced us to atleast finding someone who will understand us and give us all the freedom we deserve ALSO HE SHOULD FROM OUR CASTE because our parents wont except anybody else,but still we never pushed ourselves back from dating boys and hiding it from parents !

One such dating almost ruined my time,my love interests and what not!

It all started with me meeting a boy who was couple of years elder than me.

He was tall,handsome and seemed a good person JUST BY LOOKING i started considering him the MR. RIGHT! yes i was a fool,whenever i look back i feel like kicking my old self who only on the basis of good looks started weaving a good-good image of that person! REGRET IT.

So we met,we started talking a lot SO MUCH that our day started and closed with each others last message.Finally after 1 month we started dating ,it was all good.Felt like i was riding a fantasy car ...so smooth,endearing,happening AND PERFECT like a fairy tale ride! The only hurdle in this destination then was the fact that he was not of my caste..but as it is said" when love owns you ..you dont see no hurdle " I was so ready to fight any hurdle for him,i never wanted to come out of that phase it was the best and i thought THIS WAS THE MAN I WAS WAITING ALL MY LIFE,HE IS THE ONE ...he will give me all the freedom and love but only until things started changing ,HE STARTED CHANGING! He then used to get insecure with very little things ,he then turns out to be that boy who is super conservative and intolerant towards woman,HE WAS THE TOTAL OPPOSITE OF WHAT I WAS LOOKING FOR!

He then started taking over on my life...All my decisions,my things,my feelings,self- respect HE TOOK OVER EVERYTHING ...and i was so much in love with him that i indeed knowing all this was wrong let him do things to me! I LOST MYSELF IN THE PROCESS OF MAKING US!

He used to stop me from talking to boys,wearing anything even a bit disclosing...also banned me from going to certain places and justified all these acts of his saying IT FOR MY SAFETY AND HE CARES FOR ME! i was an emotional fool then i really thought maybe he is right and blindly gave him chances and always loved him even after everyday fights and doubts he made on me.

I felt like i was rather trapped in his prison than his protective arms! Some days he would even stop me from meeting and spending time with my only girl bestfriend and justify it by saying that She is not a nice girl and hanging out with her will damage my image too WHICH WAS NOT TRUE! He certainly wanted me to be alone and only with him ,he wanted me to cut out from the normal world and enter his den ! He even forced me on sex when i was not ready...i tried convincing him on giving me time but he would easily try his hand on emotional dialogues and fool me FOR US TO WORK i even lost my virginity even though my inner me was not with me on doing this! AFTER YEARS i had it enough , i panicked when he started accusing and doubting on me of things i had never done and it was very not impossible for me to explain and prove myself.ONE DAY i got a reality check and realised that i am step by step entering into a wrong path and i need to stop this! finally i tried breaking up BUT AS SMART AS HE WAS he emotionally tried convincing me on how much he loves me and couldnt loose me and thats why he is protective and also told me if i breakup he will drink poison and die...to which i was horrified and scared I CRIED I WANTED TO GET OUT OF IT but then i knew i was trapped ...i gave me another chance..he promised he will stop all this I GAVE HIM ANOTHER CHANCE TO break my heart but as expected he never changed IT WAS ALL A TRAP and now even breaking up was the option i was scared to opt ...i started accepting him and his possesiveness as my destiny ,i started accepting the fact that i m trapped and i cannot ever come out of this..UNTIL AFTER MONTHS His behaviour crashed my mind again when he in anger pulled my hand so hard that with my last heart that i build for his last chance terrificly broke and THIS TIME I WAS SHAKEN with horror..i knew that if i dont stop this i will be the victim of domestic violence one day,My inner self shaked me and brought me into my real senses THIS TIME THERE WAS NO HEART INSIDE ME LEFT TO COME INTO HIS TRAP ..this time i realised that if i want to LIVE i have to fight for myself Now it was high time i fought for me ,MY SELF RESPECT.

I told myself " i dont deserve this shit,i deserve myself ,i deserve having my rights and i deserve kicking an ass of a person whoever tries to pull me down! I FINALLY BROKE THE FEAR ,i went ahead and broke up AND THIS TIME I PROMISED MYSELF i wont return if i dont end this! He did everything ,he emotionally blackmailed ,asked for chances Pleading ,threatened me of dying BUT I WAS CLEAR about what i want! i knew he deserved no shit ! i broke up with him also after days texted him and made him recollect what all he has done with me,TO WHICH he reacted as if he realises he was wrong made all fake promises and asked me to come back BUT I TOLD HIM CLEARLY even if i am in my worst case scenario i wont ever marry you or date you ever i will infact die rather being with you!

TODAY i stand a strong person,my past must have broken me but also polished me and gave me lifetime experience and strength ,i no more let anybody pull me down or take over me!

He who said he will die if i leave him is still living and faking with many other girls who i pity upon,i hope they all get a push soon and come to power for self! I KNOW TODAY I AM A FIGHTER BECAUSE I EMERGED OUT OF THAT HELL LIKE A WARRIOR.