#imagine he bites u with those tho

[leafyolive]

bite

[i-cant-sing]

Spill more abt barbarian bkg mother🙏

Hmm, barbarian bakugo has a mini zoo that travels everywhere his tribe goes, because as much as he doesnt want to- he has a habit of unintentionally pissing u off, so its always good to have some animals to gift you as pets and try to cool your anger? I mean, imagine Barbarian Bakugo just climbing up your window with a baby sheep strapped to his back, using it as a shield when you yell at him for pushing your knight Izuku down the stairs (because katsuki said "back off from the princess. I can protect her")

Barbarian Bakugo loves to feed you with his own hands, especially when he's hunted the meat/cooked it on the camp fire. Like I can just see him pulling reader into his lap and giving you the first big bite with his hands, and then he eats whatever is left of the morsel himself before giving you the next bite. You dont understand his affection at first, chalking it upto his barbarian traditions youre unaware of. Your teeth sometimes graze his fingers when he feeds you, and Katsuki makes sure to lick that area particularly when he feeds himself the morsel. Oh also, youre not leaving until he thinks youre full. You could be feeling nauseous, ready to just about burst, but Katsuki thinks you can eat a little more. Besides, in his head, hes just training you to consume an average healthy barbarian diet.

Child bakugo and child reader were absolutely adorable- i mean, the number of times the servants have walked in on the two playing "wedding" where bakugo keeps on proposing to you with different exotic animals but you keep saying no because Emperor Kai has already gifted you all those exotic pets, and Katsuki is just on this mission to find you the most unique creature because then you'll just have to say yes to him. So... he steals a dragon egg.

Also- Bakugo and Empress Momo have been at each other's throats since they were kids- always fighting for your attention at royal playdates. Meanwhile, youre trapped under your lazy fat tiger- Rice Puff, who refuses to let you venture out of the castle to "invite a bear for tea party".

Knowing how much you despise concubine Keigo, Katsuki does take any oppurtunity he can to subtly disrespect him/frame him/get him in trouble in front of King Dabi (a difficult feat) and Prince Shotou (a much easier feat since SHotou already hates Keigo).

Bakugo- even tho hes a barbarian, has learned the waltz and other fancy shit royal families do, just for you. He wants you to be proud of him (not that he realised that you already had 2 left feet, but he doesnt mind u stepping on his feet), and knowing how protective Dabi is of you, he doesnt want any short comings from his part.

[im-yn-suckers]

bf!enha x latina!reader; how enhypen would be with a latina girlfriend! -pure fluff!- warnings; booty smacking, kissing, boobies

heeseung

bro loves ur boobs. most latinas have bigger chests (not me tho stay safe.) so when ure laying down, expect this goofvball to lay on your tits

would call you mami pt 1

along w titties, i feel like hed also like butts. like imagine ure standing in the kitchen and he comes up behind u, pinches ur butt, then backhugs you. like-

all latinas have very beautiful bodies, but if youre like a curvier one with a waist and thighs, bros on his knees.

jay

now we know bros a chef so hed def try andn make some foods from where ur from!!

adores everypart of you for sure!!

personall when someone says 'mi amor' it kinda cringes me out idk why. so if youre lkike me, hed def say it just to see u cringe

not related but would let you bite him ^^

jake

calls you mami pt2

butt lover pt 2

a lot of latinas looks really good in low rise jeans w the white outline(not me tho stay safe pt 2) yk eat im talking ant right. neway, bros on his kness pt2

will wear "i heart my hot latina gf" shirt

will go to a baile or like ur fams bday party and will be the one dragging you to dance

sunghoon

ngl this is hard. but hed for sure but u the flare pants bc all latinas look good in those. the forbidden pants are a big pass only bc the pattern

loves big booty latinas and will wear shirts that say it

latinas never admit they were wrong. and neither does he. good lucl fr

cant forget he loves kissing you bc the lips??? th full lips??? the plump lips??

sunoo

food lover!!! hed actually love all the food.

'baby do you have anymore of those chips' after eating an entire bag of takis (most latinas eat hot vheetos but hot cheetos are basic)

two psychotic hot ppl in love for sure

qnother one whi loves kissies >3<

jungwon

'babe, what does chinga tu madre mean?' only tellhim if he swears to use it apporpriately not just say it for fun ToT

yk those thread braclets with beads and charms on it. yea bro would wear it

will say youre crazy and when you freak *not all latinas are like this* hell def get scared

niki

another food one

calls you mami pt 3 "WHO IS THAT FINE ASS WOMAN STANDING RIGHT THERE"

butt lover pt 3 lays on your butt, squeezes your butt and smacks your butt.

tit lover pt 2 not in a sexual way. hed also lay on yout titties

eats hot cheetos with valentina w/o you

def calls you mi amor once again to cringe you out, bc he also cringes.

[maxlarens]

okay i’m feeling especially crazy about this concept but imagine like reader having her pr relationship going on and being pissed at george and during qualifying or free practice or even a race, george is halfway through telling her something (maybe telling her something about pace, or what max had been complaining about on the track) and she just goes “no radio!” and cuts him off. i just KNOW george would be so offended cause why would you do that?? i’m supposed to help you why would you do that

ugh yes eve. i love when they're messy it's too good too perfect. okay let's say free practice because i imagine that they have like clear cut rules about arguing during quali especially. and during races they keep it to arguing about race strategy only no petty disagreements allowed😭 but free practice is a free for all and reader takes full advantage of that.

like please they've just had a weird fight/argument where nothing has actually been said, but george is bothered by her pr boyfriend hanging around hospitality and she's annoyed having to pretend she likes her pr boyfriend. and when she gets in the car they're not making eye contact or doing any of their standard pre track rituals. so everyone can tell somethings up😭

and hmm okay, not gonna write a full drabble but here's a little bit of something. not exactly exactly what u were saying because i didn't want to just repeat it. hope u like it tho🥰

The car is shit. The car is so shit.

The wheel is pulling whenever you take a corner and you feel like you're on a roller coaster with the way it's rattling. At this point, it feels like the floor might just drop out from under you. Land on the track and cause a red flag.

You wouldn't be surprised, honestly. It might even be helpful, might stop the rest of the grid from getting valuable practice time in⏤

You veer into the gravel as you take a corner, swear loudly to yourself and force the car back onto asphalt. It takes far more effort than it should, you're fighting the car. It shouldn't be like this. It should glide. It should be smooth. It has been smooth.

You're not sure what's going on.

The garage need to know... George needs to know.

Ugh. George.

Plainly, you're annoyed at him.

George and his loaded looks and pointed comments about safety and that head of prince curls and a line of straight white teeth⏤ okay, you're not supposed to be letting your thoughts go there⏤ it's just difficult to stop them, even if he's being a total arse about your not-boyfriend. Who the fuck is George to say that you're not allowed personal guests? You're the driver! He's your engineer.

Derek can go wherever he pleases as far as you're concerned. Just as long as it's not too close to you.

The car pulls. You swear.

The radio crackles, startling you just as you get the car off gravel.

"Verstappen says you were impeding."

You laugh, sharp, short, humourless at the sound of George's clipped voice, at the irony of you impeding anyone but yourself right now, "Impeding. Ha! Good one."

"It was through turn⏤"

"The car's a piece of shit," you bite, cutting him off, "I can't get it out of the gravel, never mind stop myself from impeding Verstappen."

"Keep that off the radio," he scolds.

You roll your eyes, wrangle a turn like you're wrangling a wild bull, then snap,

"Okay! No radio!", and lean forward, flick the switch to turn the radio firmly off.

It's stiff, unused. There's no rule per se that says you can't turn the radio off whenever you'd like to. But it's frowned upon. You're blind if there's an emergency, a red flag, if they want you into the pits where you're heading anyway. George will be angry. Spewing.

Good.

Exactly how you want him.

i need to make one of those radio graphics that u make for them omg. anyway thank u for this eve!! ur mind!!!!

[landitolover]

𝒅𝒖𝒍𝒄𝒆 𝒉𝒐𝒕𝒍𝒊𝒏𝒆 part three | previous part ౨ৎ oscar x reader

yourusername • 10 minutes ago

send message ♡ ➣

oscarpiastri replied to this story

oscarpiastri

cute cat

yourusername

wow who is this famous man in my dms

🤔😲

oscarpiastri

not famous

yourusername

ok mr f1 driver

oscarpiastri

i said cute cat

🙄🙄

yourusername

me and my cat 🤓

oscarpiastri

very cute, did you know that ?

yourusername

what?

yeah she is

oscarpiastri

wait no

i meant you?

yourusername

🤔

ohmygod.

oscarpiastri

sorry that was odd

yourusername

😭😭🫠🫠😵‍💫😵‍💫

no it’s okay

thank you

you’re cute too ‘!:&;&;/$:@/&;@,&/&-“/&;

oscarpiastri

😅😅

thank you

yourusername

of course

uh

i gotta bounce

bye!!!

oscarpiastri

bye, talk to you later?

yourusername

of course 😊

y/n ⛄️

GUYS

HELLO

HELP

xienma 🛐

yeah?

madeline 🤺

are you okay queen 🙏🏼

y/n ⛄️

DULCE

HOTLINE

GUY

xienma 🛐

WHAT HAPPENED

WHAT DID HE DO

y/n ⛄️

he said i was CUTE???????

then i told him i had to BOUNCE?!?!?!??

madeline 🤺

LMFAOOOOO

loser ahh

jkjk

y/n ⛄️

he’s so cute guys

i wanna bite him (affectionately)

xienma 🛐

his fans tho 😭😭

THEY GON GET UUU

y/n ⛄️

me fighting the bad fans

madeline 🤺

i’m just imagining u on those

wag gossip accounts 😭😭

‘oscar piastri spotted with a NORMAL girl named y/n l/n

and we already found her insta 🤫’

y/n ⛄️

NO STOP

that’s so SCARY…

xienma 🛐

our baby is gonna be all grown up

becoming a wag for a sport she doesn’t

know about 😔

y/n ⛄️

i don’t even know him like that 🌝

like YEAH, i stalked his insta and

found his old karting pics..

and stalked his twitter

and the mclaren youtube channel

BUT I DONT KNOW HIM

madeline 🤺

it’s giving delusional, obsessed,

crazy, insane ass bitch

xienma 🛐

ily mad but ik you aren’t talking…

u FOUND UR SITUATIONSHIPS HOUSE

ON ZILLOW???

y/n ⛄️

literally….. bro

biggest hater n for WHAT

I aint setting you up with none of his friends 🤓

madeline 🤺

OH NAWUH

PLEASE 😭

y/n ⛄️

don’t talk to me 🙄🙄

i’m going to my bed

and i’m goin to cry

for embarrassing myself

xienma 🛐

go talk to him later

give it like an hour tho

don’t wanna seem obsessed x

y/n ⛄️

ur right ok

bye

im gonna think abt my actions 😞

madeline 🤺

bye queen 👩‍🍳

oscah 🦅

LANDO

LANDO

LANDO

LANDO

HELP

landoh 🥸

bro what do u want

i swear

DONT EVEEEN MENTION HER…..

oscah 🦅

oh uhmm

hahaha 😅 totally wasn’t gonna mention her

landoh 🥸

atp just tell me 🤦

oscah 🦅

THANK YOU

okay so

i called her cute

and i think she freaked out

landoh 🥸

bro u were supposed to act mysterious

🙄🙄 u were supposed to play hard to get!!!

oscah 🦅

lando what

OK BUT DO U THINK I SHOULDNT HAVE CALLED HER CUTE THEN????

landoh 🥸

ok no

how did u say it first of all

oscah 🦅

okay so she sent me like a mirror selfie

landoh 🥸

mirror selfie u say 😏😏

oscah 🦅

🤨🤨

OK but her cat was in it

and i was like “very cute, did you know that?”

landoh 🥸

OK RIZZLERR 😍😍

oscah 🦅

but.

landoh 🥸

but? 🤔

oscah 🦅

SHE THOUGHT I WAS TALKING ABOUT

HER CAT.

landoh 🥸

thats embarrassing

oscah 🦅

yeah but then i told her i was

talking about her and not her cat

then she said I was cute as well 😊

but she left in a rush

landoh 🥸

u are cute babe 😉😉

okay no but

idk she wants u 😂‼️

oscah 🦅

i am stalking her instagram rn

landoh 🥸

again???

i litch saw u stalking it when we were in a meeting with zak 😭

oscah

You’re lying on my name

landoh

no need to be embarrassed 🥸🥸

my boy is all grown up!!!

oscah 🦅

😒😒

landoh 🥸

dont give me attitude

I am literally the reason why you

even know her!! U WOULD NOT HAVE GOTTEN ON DULCE HOTLINE IF IT WASNT FOR ME

oscah 🦅

okay thanks i guess

🤦🤦

landoh 🥸

pull up hoe

oscah 🦅

I DIDNT DO ANYTHING???

landoh 🥸

DONT talk to me

🖕🏼🖕🏼🖕🏼

oscah 🦅

my honest reaction

okay bye mate

landoh 🥸

bye oscah

don’t embarrass yourself again

oscah 🦅

i wont

hopefully 🤔

Liked by madeline_han, xienmasventura, landonorris, and 4,902 others

yourusername man i sure do love myself

View all 120 comments

user realest mfo out there

user lando?? hello??

user why is lando in the likes

madeline_han LMFAOO WHY IS HIS HOMEBOY IN UR LIKES

→ yourusername stop idk?? 🤷‍♀️

→ landonorris I didn’t mean to double tap……

→ yourusername 🤔🤔

xienmasventura ily ur so cute

→ yourusername ilym gorgeous 🫶🏼

landonorris **** is drooling over these photos

→ user the censor?? 🤔🤔🤔

oscarpiastri

you looked pretty in your post

yourusername

ahhh 🤭

thank you

oscarpiastri

yeah of course :)

sorry that lando was in your likes

yourusername

no it’s fine

it’s just kinda funny 😭

oscarpiastri

this could be us, just saying 🤷🤷

like could be us if you gave me your number…

yourusername

the garfield to my arlene 🙈

I’m convinced 🤗

my number is ***-***-***

oscarpiastri

okay 😊

y/n ⛄️

CODE RED!!

THIS IS NOT A DRILL

HE ASKED FOR MY NUMBER.

xienma 🛐

you gave it to him

RIGHT????

y/n ⛄️

duh 🙄

madeline 🤺

omg 😱😱

the number … big steps

y/n ⛄️

ik im FREAKING out

xienma 🛐

who does this lil boy think he is 🙄

stealing my gf 😭😪

y/n ⛄️

dw bae, i’m 4ever urs

madeline 🤺

why was his homeboy in ur likes tho

y/n ⛄️

idk tbh 😭

i think it was an accident

xienma 🛐

stop cause he’s kinda….

madeline 🤺

OKK GIRL……

🌝

xienma 🛐

stfu thats why your ex looked like the blonde

bitch from polar express 💀💀

y/n ⛄️

naw thats foul

now ME PERSONALLY….. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

ok bye HE MESSAGED ME 😊

oscar 😊

heeyoo

sorry i didn’t message you right away 😅

y/n

no that’s fine 😭

soo what are you up to

oscar 😊

nothing much

I’m pretty bored tbh

y/n

me too 😪

oscar 😊

i suck at 8 ball

y/n

i doubt it

now play back 😠😠

oscar 😊

yes ma’am

wait why am i kinda good

y/n

i’m the goat at 8 ball

oscar 😊

if i win u owe me a kiss

y/n

ig you aren’t getting a kiss??

oscar 😊

🙄🙄

🤷🤷??

y/n

FUCK 😭😭😭

too bad u aren’t in france

oscar 😊

omw to france as we speak 🙄

y/n

🐌🐌 escaping rn

WOAH WAIT

i just got 13K followers out of nowhere???

oscar 😊

huh 😭 thats crazy

y/n

oh my god

😨��

oscar 😊

what?

y/n

i got posted on those f1 gossip pages

CAUSE OF UR LITTLE FRIEND 😭😭

oscar 😊

i’m so sorry

uhm I didn’t mean for that to happen

oh my god 😭 I’m really sorry

y/n

oh no, it’s not your fault!!

Liked by madeline_han, xienmasventura, and 6,829 others

f1_gossip NEW WAG? Y/n L/n is a 22-year-old university student. She currently lives in france, according to her posts. Lando commented and liked her post earlier today.

View all 502 comments

user is this confirmed?

→ user no lol they’re just spreading rumors

user she’s so pretty!!

user honestly 😭😭 I don’t think they are

→ user same.. like can he not just comment and like her post??

→ user RIGHT! like let him live

user god i hope not… she’s.. 🌝

→ madeline_han so mad n for what? he ain’t gonna pick u!!

user why is he always pulling the baddies

xienmasventura yourusername LMFAOOO GIRL

→ yourusername 🌝🌝 deleting my account

landonorris she’s not my girlfriend 😊 thanks for spreading rumors though!!!

→ user embarrassing for whoever posted this

→ user fr i’d b BAWLING

౨ৎ HELLLLOOOOO!!! i am back 🐨 sorry for taking FOREVER to update this series… I will try to be better once i’m on winter break 🐌!! anyways i hope you enjoy this bc i was lit up writing it until 2 AM…… 🌝🌝

taglist @d6za1 @amoosarte @moneygramhaas @alessioayla @cherry-piee @chasing-liberosis @asparklysoul @goldenalbon @benstormy @he6rtshaker @ririyulife @charli12345678 ౨ৎ

[planetdream]

VAMPIRE SEVENTEEN

this post contains: vampirism, canon vampire lore depending on who you ask. mentions of blood, bloodsucking ofc. and mentions of sex [grinding, strength kink, orgasms] darker themes for wonwoo’s [hypnosis + kidnapping, sorry]

💌 sorry, this was rotting in my drafts. each entry has a different vibe. enjoy <3 this was requested btw

the man, the myth, the legend; SEUNGCHEOL is one of the greatest vampires out there (up there with dracula and nosferatu). he’s thought to be a myth, a story passed down generation by generation of an evil vampire that lurks in the night, you know, the usual. but every so often there’s proof, small hints that seungcheol is actually out there, lurking amongst the living. he rarely shows his face, only to seduce—plucking off one, maybe two, or groups of people for his dinner. seungcheol lusts for blood over anything. [he is indeed very dominant and very sexy—if you ask him to bite you, he absolutely will but he's more than likely to turn you.] kinda gives dracula 2020 vibe if you’ve seen it; he’s adjusting to the new world.

JEONGHAN is a rather "stereotypical" vampire. gorgeous, elegant, got turned when his hair was bleached, thus he's blond, bloodthirsty, and somehow even sexier. he's not one to lie about being a vampire, nor is jeonghan ashamed of it (he has no regrets); he'll flash his fangs or drink from someone in public, he doesn't give a fuck. and of course, what a slut he is. he loves to drink the blood of the person he's fucking, right as they're creaming for him. has allegedly had the most threesomes out of the thirteen. patrick bates type, flexing in the mirror as he's fucking; mind u, he can't see himself. has had a hand in the creation of a few vampires (direct result of him being slutty)

in his current lifetime, JOSHUA has decided to lay low. he's had several lifetimes of partying, drinking freely and the usual drama in the vampire community (centuries of arguing over the same shit). right now, he feels a bit lost, like something is missing. but he’s gained way too many hobbies to keep track of and he’s even started that wine company he’s dreamed of (mind you that was 100 years ago). he’s yearning, aching, lonely. envisioning him to be the type to be constantly searching for a soul that's like his long lost lover…signs up for hinge (bad idea); all of his matches want him to drink their blood once they find out that he’s a vampire, he’s not really into those that are eager for it.

ok im thinking vampire prince JUNHUI. you meet eyes with him in passing on a busy day. since then, he's appeared in all your dreams (most of them being of the romantic/erotic variety besides the small, sudden glimpses of blood and horrors, physically feeling a piercing sensation in your neck despite being asleep), he's shown up across the street of your work only to disappear in a blink, you've seen him in crowded places, just staring at you—strange, soft music playing in your head whenever he appears, seemingly caught up in his mystery. he doesn't appear for you until he's sure you need him; typically when something fairly traumatic happens. he sweeps you away in a time of uncertainty, offering to be your protector and to show you 'a new world'.

vampire boyfie SOONYOUNG. in classic vampire suitor fashion; he wines you, dines you, and if you want sixtynine (and other pleasures) are definitely on the table as well. i just imagine him to be extremely sweet and well meaning; which leads me to believe, he doesn’t tell you that he’s a vampire until like date five (he already assumes ur his partner by then). has a dilemma of ‘will they really love me if they knew about my affliction’. so he tells you, voice shaking. and you’re just like ??? hoshi? a vampire? LOL…. then he shows you his fangs—you watch how they protrude from his gums in real time; it’s quick, if you blinked you would have missed it. realizes that might’ve been a little off-putting and gets embarrassed. it’s okay tho, bc it makes him hotter :p

WONWOO, your incredibly hot history professor. you catch him on a dark street near campus one night, teeth buried into the neck of one of his students; veins popping out of his skin, face red in hunger as he feeds and feeds. once he spots you, he drops his prey—eyes filled with a look that’s a cross between fury and disappointment as he stomps over to you. it’s unnecessary to run, he’s already caught you before you’ve even turned your back. he whispers in your ear, tone enchanting like a lullaby. when you wake up, you find that your dark surrounding is actually a small, velvety box that contains you; stripped of your clothing in exchange for old satin material.

another vampire of the elegant variety JIHOON knows exactly how he wants to live the rest of his life, and he's not exactly looking for anything 'new'. he sticks to his bubble, his same set of friends and he only gets out every so often; preferring to bury himself within his own darkness and stench (a singular coffin in a singular room with no windows) only to come out for feasting purposes. i think that the one thing that does keep him tied to the earthly world is music; and often, he has published his own throughout the years under various names and genres. to jihoon, the best part of living (or lack their of) is the music; in addition to experiencing as much history as he has.

vampire boyfriend SEOKMIN longs for your blood. he craves to bite you. literally just say the word and he'll bite you. but only if you want. did i mention that he wants to bite you? has to look away from you when you're talking because he gets distracted by the pulsing vein in your neck; it speaks to him, whispering the breezing sound of blood rushing. he has to either look away from you or lock eyes intently with you; which ends up just looking like he's begging for pussy. and truth is, it absolutely does get him hard just thinking about drinking your sweet crimson nectar….oh the things he’d do..

ok so MINGYU has an advantage bc not only is he a vampire but he's built! like yeah, his physique won't change now that he's a vampire, and yeah, he now has vampire strength—he still goes to the gym. kind of just out of routine, but he says it still gives him a euphoric feeling. that being said, loves to pick you up and throw you around. strength play. you remember the type of sex bella and edward had in breaking dawn? that’s a regular for mingyu. almost regularly having to by new bed frames because when mingyu fucks, he really fucks. don’t worry though, he’s not always rough!

i am inclined to believe that MINGHAO is throwing blade-style, sexy bloodbath vampire parties as a sort of side gig or he's just been swayed into the club scene this lifetime. he's the guy you keep seeing at the club for weeks on end, and when you lock eyes with him, you hear a whispering in your ear. and all of a sudden, you want to approach him but he's gone before you can. one night he's the one to approach you. thus queuing a heavy, steamy make out in the club followed by some grinding. next thing you know, you're at his place and he's showing you all that life can truly be, all of the pleasures and curiosities. he shows you his fangs, as well, doesn't care if you're scared or not (he likes the fear, though). he does ask to bite you; and if you say yes, he indeed marks you up.

VERNON got bit rather recently (couple hundred years). in his human life he was very curious about the concept of life as well as life after death, immortality, and subsequently, vampirism. he drove himself into become a madman until his studies led him to becoming his own study subject. he projects that, if he's lucky, in the next hundred years he'll be able to build a vampirism research facility. despite being a vampire, there are still some things that he doesn't know. and for some reason, even after becoming a vampire, his research is always with humans in mind. he wants to help humanity improve, evolve, possibly to something greater.

SEUNGKWAN found a way to get rich off of being a vampire. he's a celebrity; a multimillion dollar 3-book deal (the first being an autobiography, he's thinking of making a vampire 48 laws of power next) and a late, late, late night talk show. occasionally joins the news to talk about the latest in vampire society (he's a spokesperson of sorts, often campaigning for vampire rights and such) and politics. inclined to believe he was a vampire therapist at one point. he’s more than just a pretty face and excellent conversationalist, though, he's had to overcome a lot of trials and tribulations in his many lifetimes (the perseverance of a vampire now available at your local bookstore)

vampire lee CHAN is dangerous!!! he's snatching hearts and breaking them (and slurping the blood out of them). the type of vampire that just needs some black sunglasses and he's fully able to walk in the daylight (no, he doesn't sparkle, but he wishes he could). doesn't have many enemies unless you count some of his exes then well.... he's not into turning anybody because although he loves being a vampire, those first few thousand years were filled with so much agony—watching your loved ones pass on, witnessing horrors beyond your imagine and knowing that there is nothing you could possibly do about it despite your gift of immortality. he'd rather just drain people of their blood and leave it at that (genuinely thinks its foolish to want to be a vampire, and will be offended if asked to turn someone). seriously, don't ask him to turn you.

[tyunn1ngz]

yeonjun nsfw alphabet

cw: lots of afab!reader but no gender stated!

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

runs u a nice bath— most of the time w him bathing w u bc of ur insistence; words of praise, crinkled eyes with gentle smiles as he kisses into ur wet skin hehe

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

of his i can definitely see it being his mouth, and who wouldn’t b obsessed w lips like that!!!!!!!!!! likes how they look covered in ur lipstick, bruised from kisses, covered in ur cum and everything along that nature<3

on you i think it’d be ur thighs or ur ass, mainly based on how much he gropes his members as is LOL. loves the plush of ur thighs in every position, loves biting and groping at the soft skin and leaving his mark on u <3 thinks theyre especially cute when they tremble when u feel particularly good ^_^

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

lovvvesssssss cumming in u when u’ll let him (read: always) — doesn’t cum a whole lot nor is it thick but he’ll make sure u take every drop until he’s sure u’ll probably have a scare … shrugs …

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

probably lowk does hope he’ll knock u up even tho u guys r so adamant that ur not ready ٩(^‿^)۶

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

a little experienced maybe but doesn’t necessarily transfer every detail to his next partner if that makes sense? he knows generally not everyone feels pleasure the same ways and at the same levels so while he thinks he knows what hes doing he likes the confirmation and a little guidance where necessary bc he rly wants it to be good for u

f = favourite position (this goes without saying)

missionary w ur thighs over his hips … what more can i say

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

definitely likes to joke around, he can be serious if u really want that but if u want him as he is hes gonna be giggling and smiling bc he just loves u so much he cant believe he gets to have u like this!!!!!!! probably gets more serious the closer he is to cumming hehe can’t hold himself together long enough to even try giggling <3

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

well groomed id say he cares abt his appearance but not to the point where hes completely bare i dont think , just well kept ! :]

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

hes romantic in the aspect of making u feel comfortable w him, like w the answer for G i think he can be quite silly during but thats what makes it more intimate bc its u two getting to know each others bodies best!!! just loving on each other, holding each other close and giggling into each others mouths which occasionally breaks off into pretty moans

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

loves to send u videos of himself jerking off imo !!!!! if hes not filming it for u i cant imagine he cares much for getting off by himself at all anymore whats the point of that!!!!!

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

hmmmmmm said it before but spit is a big one for him i think !! drooly kisses, calling u his good baby when he spits in ur mouth, spitting on ur cunt before he fucks u open w his tongue and fingers … the possibilities r simply endless !

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

probably likes a little thrill, semi public spaces and such where its not THAT likely someone will find/hear u but just a sliver of a chance perhaps ฅ/ᐠ. ̫ .ᐟ\ฅ bathroom at a party or smth is probably the riskiest he’ll go <3 otherwise just either of ur homes is the way to go !!

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

literally almost anything abt u but especially i think any glimpses he would get of ur hips or thighs during the day would make him froth a little and he starts to think more abt those thighs on either sides of his head— all thoughts out of his own perverse nature

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

as much as theres a general hc i cant see him as a hard mean dom but that could just b me and to each their own!!! he’s realistically too much of a sweetheart so the idea of being especially mean to u ever even if its meant to be hot just doesn’t rly quite do it for him but he’s willing to try at least once if thats what u really want

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

oh hes a GIVER. that boy is a MUNCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and hes GOOD AT IT!!!!!!!!!!! the teasing leadup, the way he gives himself into it wholeheartedly, moaning into u like its him getting off… and again! that mouth! case closed!!!!

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

depends on how pent up he is!!! generally he likes it fast but not too rough, but sometimes he gets worked up enough he’s a little rougher and harder w it, or whenever u want it he’ll get a little rougher !! however u want it, he’s willing to give it to u<3 almost always its sensual tho have u seen his hips :3

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

would probs love a good quickie but prefers when he has the time to tease u up to ur orgasm, knowing u always come harder w the anticipation and perhaps just a little edging :p

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

definitely game to experiment especially if theres smth u wanna try and u get so squirmy and heated in the face talking abt it, probably not too risky tho!!! nothing that could seriously hurt u or himself

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

stamina is pretty criminal, could take u for about 3 rounds before he finally tires out but only for a break, then he’s on u for ur fourth orgasm on his tongue, strong ass jaw workout ill tell u that

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

YES! vibrators absolutely, nice silk ropes for bondage, pretty glass dildos to use on u, a galore of things he wants to try on you but sometimes he thinks abt you using them on him and gets himself so hard he thinks he could cum in his pants if u so much as kissed him

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

a LOT !!! but thats all part of his foreplay ur just so easy to rile up and so cute to make squirm under just his fingertips

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

pretty loud ? but not much and not on purpose, breathless moans that break off into longer pitchier whines when pleasure wracks through his body hehe

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

he’s definitely cum in his pants more than once just from eating u out

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

honestly? i think he wouldn’t actually be that big like average or even just a bit below BUT!!! that’s just the thing isn’t it bc size doesn’t matter if u know how to use it! and lord does he!!!!!!!!

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

pretty high, but can u blame him when he has someone as stunning as u to always be his

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

i don’t think he’d fall asleep fast unless u guys have had Excessive rounds … but anyway defo stays up w ur head pressed to his chest, playing w ur hair and telling u silly stories until u fall asleep first <3

[mashiraostail]

your gang orca praise kink stuff goes soooo crazy please give us some gentle dom praising from halsin w Fem reader PLEASE

glad u like it thank u!!

yall are crazy outing your praise kink in my ask box. Ask and u shall receive tho!!! Kind of a long one, i care for u guys so I have to feed u.

NSFW under the cut!

Aches blossomed like weeds all over your poor body. Maybe you should have brought Halsin along on this one, a healer would have done you well about 3 hours ago. He stayed back, or perhaps he went on his own way for the day. For all your not seeing eye to eye Astarion was seemingly happy to help you hobble along with an arm slung over his shoulder.

He's biting something back and Karlach all but shoves it out of him.

"Thank you. For...taking those hits for me." He rolls his eyes when he says it, but it does nothing to veil his grateful tone, "i can't imagine it was pleasant."

"It wasn't." You muse back, "but you're helping me along."

"Well-" He sputters, "I figured you could take it since you have Halsin waiting for you with baited breath every night."

He was right, you did. He tried to be subtle, to give everyone a once over after a hard day, but he always lingered on you. He liked you, perhaps more, it was obvious. At least when you stumble back to camp he has a reason to make a b-line to you first.

"What happened?" He takes you from Astarion, who snickers a bit at you.

"Nothing, just the typical day." You shrug.

"Is everyone else okay?" Bless him, he feigns interest in the other 3 trailing behind you.

"Don't worry." Wyll waves, "we'll live."

"Come with me." He doesn't even respond to Wyll, he was not as good of an actor as he hoped to be.

You go with him, not that he gave you much of a choice, guiding you away before he could even finish. He settles you down by a shallow river not too far off from camp. He brings a bowl and a rag, with a small sack of supplies to clean you off with.

"I know you're capable." He starts, as he wipes layers of blood and grime away from your skin, "i'm not underestimating you-"

"I understand." You cut him off before he can prattle off into a nervous explanation as to why he seems to favor you over the others when you're injured.

You fall back into silence as he cleans you off.

"Look up at me." Fingers on your chin crane your gaze up to him, if he's trying to be seductive it has certainly worked, and if he wasn't it was cruel. He's scanning your face, his eyes meet your gaze.

"Will I live?" There's a coyness to your voice that just about knocks him off balance.

"Yes, lucky me. Does your head hurt?"

"Not at all." You felt better, under his caring hands, there was a dull soreness now, it overtook the harsh and stinging aches.

It was already dark, nobody had bothered to call the pair of you for dinner, perhaps more knowing than they let on.

"Can I do anything else for you?" He asks, kneeling now but still tall enough to be gazing down at you. The dull light of your lantern made him glow.

"No-" Suddenly you can't play coy anymore, it's like his sucked the air out of your lungs, he takes your hand.

"Will you stay with me tonight?" when he asks he traces his fingers over the back of your knuckles.

"Of course." You nod, something flutters under your ribs. He brushes his lips over the back of your hand, and it lights you up. It's such a silly, small, innocuous gesture, but it makes your stomach warm.

"Thank you." He looks up from the back of your hand to catch your gaze.

You kiss your teeth, your mouth feels dry all of a sudden, "why thank me?"

"Because you're allowing me." Halsin murmurs it, "I'm grateful to be let so close to you." He kisses his way up your arm in a galant gesture, though it makes you feel light headed none the less. When he reaches the crook of your neck, the shallow divot where your shoulder ends he stops, and drops your arm gently onto your lap.

"You can act modest, or play coy," He continues despite the lack of contact, which makes you feel cold and even more exposed then when he's ravishing you. "But you know how I want you. You indulge me."

"Please," You're fluttering, you try to sound casual but you're fluttering like a moth and Halsin is a big, bright fire drawing you in. "it's self serving."

"Even better." He elects to sit beside you, "indulge yourself in me."

"Oh gods." You feel hot, in the back of your neck, in your chest, between your legs.

"What?" Halsin reaches for you, you let him, he wraps an arm around you, he draws you in. "don't you want to?"

"I do-" You're practically whining despite the fact he has not denied you, and probably never would. You turn your face into his neck, nosing at his collar. He makes a pleased noise at the feeling, and brings a hand up to cup your hair.

"Then tell me what you want. You can have it, you deserve it. Anything, just tell me."

You aren't sure when you make your way into his lap, when the desire to taste his skin becomes so potent that you have no choice but to glide your tongue over his collar bone. He's happy to rub up your back and thighs, to pull your closer by the back of your head.

"Is it me you want?"

You moan, gasping, you aren't sure when you started rutting against his leg, but he seems all the more happy to have you there so you cast aside the sheer embarrassment of it all.

"You can have it, you can have me. All you have to do is take it. I'll let you, I'm yours for the taking."

You practically cry at that, you aren't sure when you'd become so pent up.

"You can have me." One of his hands is holding onto the bend of your hip, guiding them against his leg in a languid rolling pace, "you already do. You deserve it, all of it, whatever you want. Tell me."

You let him take your shirt off, you're more than keen to free him of his.

"I must have been particulalry well behaved in my past life." For a breif moment his hand releases your hips and he's gliding rough palms over your chest and stomach, "you're such a lovely thing..." He ducks down, kisses at your chest, pulling you away from the perfect friction of his thigh to the warm heat of his mouth and tongue.

He's kissing, licking and nipping at the newly exposed skin while his hands trail over your ass, up your back and thighs, drawing you in impossibly closer to his mouth.

"I'd give you the world, anything you'd ask." He pushes the small of your back, guiding you back down onto his lap, "but you only want me?"

"Do you really feel that way? That I should have whatever I ask for? Whatever I want?"

The sight of your chest heaving, glistening from his mouth makes him groan, "how could I not? Tell me what you want, My hands? My mouth?"

You feel on the verge of passing out, terrible and blissful all at once.

He lifts you as he stands, but just a quickly sets you down again laying on your back.

"Are you sore?" His hands hold your waist, his nose is at your jaw, "I'd be content just to stay here, looking at you, kissing you. We would not need to anything more to sate me." He assures you, "the sight of you like this alone would be enough to satisfy me for lifetimes to come."

"No." You're breathless, you shake your head.

"No?" Despite what he's said he sounds hopeful, grateful, pleased even.

"No." All you can think to do is repeat him. You help him help you out of your pants.

"Will you let me?" He's already lowering himself between your legs, you flush.

"You hardly have to ask permission."

"Yes?" He pushes you for it anyways, of course you indulge him.

"Yes."

It's been hundreds of years, of course he was an attentive and...skilled lover, but this was almost too much.

Your back arched off the ground, his hands were there, big and warm and slightly rough, he held your waist there his fingers wrapping around to the small of your back where it arched. Where they held you his hands pulled you closer, just barely.

He didn't protest when your thighs closed around his head, when they squeezed, or when your hands pulled him impossibly closer by his hair. In fact he sounded more than pleased at all of the above. Every time he had a spare breath he was singing you praises. You were perfect, you cried out for him perfectly, and you were so easy to love.

His hands squeezed your waist where they held you, he groaned every time you called his name.

When you do reach your climax it almost blinds you for a second, but Halsin doesn't seem interested in letting you rest until you force him off with a keening sort of whine at the overstimulation.

"I'm sorry," He's kissing at your legs, your lower stomach and up your ribs ravenously, "I can't bring myself to stop with you."

It's so easy to open yourself up to him, to let him take and for you to take what you want.

"You're so lovely." He's kissing around your chest, subtly gasping for you air, "I'd mistake you for an angel if not for the things we do together." He guides your legs around him, closing the small amount of space left between you.

"If I didn't know you to be so truly good then I'd mistake you for something much more sinister than an angel, considering the spell you must have put on me." He's arching up into your hands, turning and preening at every touch and heavy breath, "do you know what you have done to me?"

Eventually you stop your head spinning enough to fumble with his pants, until there's nothing at all between you.

"I was taken by you from our first meeting," He groans as you undress him, "but all the things I dreamt have been put to shame at the feeling of the reality of it in my hands." He takes in an uneven breath as your hands run over his cock, you turn your head to open your neck to him, he's glad to muffle himself into it. The feeling of his low groans vibrates the crook of your neck. You arch your back, pressing your chest into his which seems to set him over the edge.

"You're the most lovely thing I've ever laid my hands on, please, say you'll have me." As if it wasn't obvious, as if you weren't laying naked below him, blossoming at his lips and fingertips.

He guides himself easily into you It’s hardly painful, it barely stings, it tingles up to your stomach, and it’s pleasant. A blooming sort of feeling that you often pined for once it was gone. It was fleeting and easily missed when it dissipated. He's captivated by you, your expressions, the way you cry out, the wavering in your voice.

As with all things, he's incredibly gracious with you, giving you long, deep rolls of his hips and easy praise. He enjoys watching you melt from it, it makes his chest warm with affection.

"You're divine," He doesn't mind your arms around his neck, he holds you closer with a hand between your shoulder blades, "every single time." He enjoys the feeling of your hand holding the back of his head too.

"Every time I swear you can have me, but you're always bent at my will aren't you? Beautiful, obedient, and mine for the taking. Look at me."

All you can do is obey and nod, maybe a bit dumbly. You wrap your legs tighter around him, there was no way you'd last very long in this state. He holds you by your chin, he keeps his eyes on you whenever you cum, muttering out obscene praises. Occasionally he'll use his hold on you to turn your head to the side, to observe your throat, he swears he can see your pulse beating.

When the pair of you are finished Halsin seems perfectly fine to dip into the shallow river, it hardly reaches his waist.

"Come here," He insists, "I'll hold you."

"is it cold?" You roll over to see him.

"No, barely." He waves you over, and fuck, you're still coming down from your high, still bent at his will. You go to him, you let him guide you by your hand into the river, once you're close enough he holds the crook of your elbow, then the bend of your waist.

You rest your head against his chest as he runs wet hands over your hair.

"Many people have held my favor in my life," He looks down at you, "but I don't recall ever being so enthralled by someone." He runs a wet hand down the side of your face, "some days I dread the thought of our paths diverging."

"Don't think you'll be rid of me so easily" You manage to be a bit cheeky. Despite yourself you brush gentle fingers over the side of his neck, he closes his eyes thankfully.

"Kiss me." His voice is quiet but steadfast. Of course you go to him.

When he pulls away it's just enough to speak, "you know I adore you, tell me you do."

"I know." You grin and push his damp hair back, "you're especially sentimental today."

"I suppose I...must have missed your company." He decides, "we usually travel together."

"Is that it? I'm not complaining, maybe we'll travel separately more often."

He groans, wrapping his arms around your waist and lifting you up, "don't be cruel to me when you were so well behaved all night. I'm not sure what I'll do."

You laugh, bracing yourself against his chest as he prepares to drop you into the river, "no please, I swear to keep you dutifully at my side from now on, just don't drop me in this water!"

He's ravishing your neck again, your laughter made his chest burn with affection, "I truly can never deny you."

You have a feeling tonight may be a longer night than average.

[froggywizzard]

Bear with me, cause it's gonna be fun. I started wondering which piercings would suit ACOTAR characters.

I love having those random thoughts.

Lucien would rock a slutty nostril with a gold ring and many hooped ear piercings (maybe with charms on them). And a tongue piercing, he absolutely would put it to good use.

Honestly, Helion could have any piercing. U name it, he has it. I imagine him looking gorgeous heavily pierced with hoops, charms, chains and all.

Elain, besides lobe piercings, could have her belly button pierced. With cute jewellery, like a butterfly or a flower. And no one would know about it.

Mor seems like a girl to get a monroe, you know? And maybe a genital piercing, a christina perhaps.

I don't think Rhysand would have any piercings. Maybe little itty bitty lobe diamonds, but I don't think so. It just doesn't suit him.

Feyre, on the other hand, could have several microdermals with shiny rocks, so she looks like she has stars on her skin. I'm think collarbones, maybe sternum.

Azriel seems like a guy with an industrial piercing. He's canonically emo, so maybe lip piercings? He definitely has his nipples pierced. I imagine silver jewellery for him.

Gwyn would have the cool girl piercing, a septum. She would keep it hidden tho. Maybe pierced nips, why not.

Cassian would look dope with his eyebrow (eyebrows?) pierced. And maybe a labret, but idk.

Nesta is piercings free. Maybe lobes, but that's it.

It's gonna be very random, but Jurian could have a prince albert. I don't know why, but it very vividly popped into my mind.

And now to the honourable mentions. I see Tarquin with a medusa, blue opal ofc, Amren with her whole kitty cat pierced, Emerie with snake bites and Tamlin with a single lobe pierced.

Also, not a piercing, but LoA would look hot af 🔥 wearing a chain that wraps around her waist, goes in-between her breath and ends up as a necklace (thank @yennas-stuff for the idea)

[wriothesleybear]

AhH thank you so much for gifting us wriothesley content🐺🐺!!!! I really wish to see his drip marketing soon 😭🙏I cannot forget your idea of him being the big bad wolf with the little red Riding Hood fem reader ever since I saw u mention it--- it is it possible if you give us some more details on the idea? Did he want to eat her at first? Does he want to start a pack w her?? I have so many questionss

it makes me happy to know you like my headcanons🥹 same about the drip marketing. hoyoverse please give us something ! any crumbs will do😫 oh gosh i havent thought that much about the wriothesley x red riding hood! reader yet hmm but if i had to give some ideas:

headcanons below ~warning: a bit suggestive~

Pre-relationship headcanons:

the reader is this innocent little thing who is so sweet, kind, is good with animals and kids, and runs a bakery/cafe which is what caught Wriothesley's eye in the first place.

he had been at your shop before for some tea and knew you were the owner and you've seen him a few times in your shop, but you two had never really spoken.

in my headcanons, i see him as a gentleman so he's usually polite to anyone unless he knows you're a bad person/criminal

one day, he saved you from a couple of criminals who were bothering you. thats when you two finally spoke to one another. you were thanking him profusely for saving you. it would probably be too cute to him so he blushes a bit from how cute you are and gives you a slight smile saying its no big deal.

a few days pass and you find out where he works so you visit him to give him some homemade muffins as a thank you. this would cause the man to become more smitten with you.

even though I see him as not really being a sweets person, he'll eat your treats since you're the one who gave it to him. i mean, what kind of gentleman would he be if he let your treats go to waste.

after this, he would visit your shop more often just to see you and of course have some tea.

you guys would enjoy having conversations with one another and this would become a daily thing.

You would learn his order by heart, already having it ready when you knew he would show up soon. he would notice this and it would cause him to fall harder for you.

You guys would start off as friends of course but it would develop into something more as you got to know more about one another and spend more time together.

He would be the one to ask you out first and you say yes ofc. (he thought you looked so cute when you said yes and it made him happy !)

ofc it was an amazing first date ! he'd go a little bit all out. its your first date after all and its for you so he has to make a good impression ;)

Some relationship headcanons:

once this man falls for you, he falls hard (wolves mate for life)

always kisses your hand !!! he doesnt do that much pda except for that, a hand around your waist, a kiss on your head. he prefers more behind closed doors *wink wink*

When people see him showing affection towards you tho, they get shocked cuz those who don't know him think he's a bit of a scary dude based on his appearance and seeing him with an adorable, innocent s/o is surprising to them.

tea dates ofc

he's playful so playful bites/licks occur often and teases you

he loves hearing you laugh and smile. makes his heart race !

SOOO PROTECTIVE!

he has to protect his cute little innocent, kind darling, can you blame him🥺

he'd be like low-key possessive.

what i mean by that is by marking you. ofc with bite marks during your love making sessions but i could also see him gifting you a necklace with a crescent or symbol that symbolizes him.

it shows others that you're his and hands off!

or imagine its a little red hood that has his symbol on it and matches his cape ahhhh! that'd be so cute!

adding on to that, he's not really the jealous type because he knows you're his but when he sees you giving someone else more attention than him, he might get a little needy.

he just wants his little red riding hood to give him all of their attention and love

please play with his hair and give him scratchies

wouldn't be overly clingy but will hang around you a lot when he can like. like he has to be touching you in a way aka hugging you, you sitting on his lap, etc. or just having you near him while he works is enough

he's gotta make sure you are reminded daily that he loves you

he would be a little bit of a worry wart when he's not with you, always wondering if you were okay

HE IS DEVOTED TO YOU! he would do anything for you maybe even break the law for you👀 he is whipped

a family man

he would for sure want to have a family with you !

would probably want a big one (going off on the fact that wolf packs are usually around 6-10 members from what i read)

Sigewinne is already your guys' child. Its important for you two to get along and you do.

When he sees you two getting along, it makes him so happy !

his thoughts often lead to thinking about you two having a family of your own one day (sorta makes him feral🫣)

he would be the one to bring up the topic when the time is right.

if you said yes, he'd be happy and probably take you right there omg🤭

if you're not ready, he would be understanding, but if you're willing, you could always 'practice' until the time comes ;)

overall, 10/10 boyfriend

i hope i didn't ramble too much. maybe i'll make a series out of this. i hope this answers your questions anon. have a wonderful day!🥰❤️

[honey-minded-hivemind]

For the One of Us au, the power of visions of past and future that u mentioned could have a lot of potential.

I imagine Reader has little, or maybe no, control over when, where, or what when it comes to their visions. They could get a vision of the end of the world while in algebra on Tuesday and then a vision of their friends' past dates while in the Danger Room on Wednesday.

For the big, important visions, like future attacks or potential threats, they warn the adults and the rest of the team, but for smaller visions, they leave it on a need to know basis because their friends need to learn and make mistakes. Tho reader may nudge them in the right direction.

I'm sorry did I say nudge? I meant SHOVE cause a reader with visions would ABSOLUTELY NO CHILL AT ALL.

Their powers aren't useful at all in combat. Everyone else can do something in a fight. But Reader doesn't, so they make themselves useful in everyday life.

The group knows Reader always has their best interests at heart, but it always throws them for a loop when their normally sweet friend suddenly starts acting really protective and aggressive.

When Duncan starts dating Jean and everyone tries to be polite, except for Scott and Reader. Scott's reasoning is obvious, and his dislike is mostly harmless. Reader? Is about 5 seconds away from biting Duncan and is actively crashing dates. (Reader knows he's a racist bully ass. They know what he'll do.)

There's a solid month where Reader kept crawling into Kurt's bed, snuggling him and following him around. At first, he just thinks they're just being cuddly, then everything about his birth and his mom and the experiments come out. Then, it's like oh, that's why.

Reader gets a vision of Logans past and has to deal with the fact they know more about this man than he does.

They get a vision of Jean getting kidnapped by Fred and decides to NEVER EVER LEAVE HER ALONE EVER. Seriously Jean how does this keep happening to you?!

Reader approaches Rogue first out of everyone cause they know she's Kurt sister and so desperately wants to show her she's not alone.

Ooooooo... I don't known if I'll choose this as the canon power for Reader in 🍁One Of Us🧡, but let's explore it for a minute, shall we? (If you want to explore the other potential powers and help figure it out, I'm okay with it! I like when anons and hivelings do so! Thank you for this ask, @sugar-soda!)

Reader is such a worried, odd friend. They seem to always know something about you, no matter if they've met you or have ever even heard of you. They sometimes stutter or mumble- other times they're loud and assertive- sometimes they're sweet as pie and cuddly- and sometimes they glare daggers at you like you murdered their goldfish. With Reader, no one ever knows what to expect.

Duncan, the school football star, for example, is given death glares, is given at least three shovel talks (complete with an angry/protective Scott for back-up), he's given notes telling him to break up with Jean or else, he's told to be a better person or he'll regret it, Reader outdoes him in the poetry club (he joined to impress Jean), etc. . The consensus is Reader, the school's go-to life advice person, despises him, and no one knows why... (Then Duncan amd Jean break up, and now everyone knows Reader knew somehow those two wouldn't work together...)

Reader is gentle and open with Rogue, the school goth girl and lone wolf, on the other hand. They hold the door open for her, they ask if she needs a break during group projects or study sessions, they scare creepy students away from her, they offer to walk her home when the Brotherhood teens left her a few days, they even give her space if she asks for it. No one gets it; why bother with someone they don't even know or seem to get along with? Until the next week Rogue is with the Xavier teens, eating lunch and sharing classes and being overall friendly amd cordial, and once again Reader seems to have known it was possible to be friends with her (the school wonders how that was possible...)

Then Reader tries to share food with Todd, who has an odd (really gross) smell and who steals from others, and no one in any clique can figure out what Reader is up to now. They just leave food for the toad-like teen, then go about their day. Todd eats it, enjoys it, and there's always three meals each day waiting by or in his locker, enough for him, and then later, enough for the other boys at the Brotherhood home. The Xavier teens can't figure out why, neither can the school, but Todd knows, and tells everyone to not mess with his friend/buddy, be it the jocks or the bullies or even his group (turns out the Brotherhood don't have a lot of money for meals, so Reader pulls together their cooking skills and leftover ingredients to make them enough food for each day. Todd knows this, and accepts it as a sign of friendship; Xavier in the end ends up sending them money for a food budget so Reader will leave them alone...)

Logan, tough as nails and deadly as a wolverine, is struggling with his nightmares and wakes up at night, not able or willing to fall back asleep, and wanders into the kitchen late at night. Except Reader is also there, and keeps him company, pushing a plate of meat over to their teacher/guardian and saying they couldn't sleep either. It becomes a ritual every Thursday night, the two of them sitting in silence sometimes, or watching some old western movies, sometimes Reader even opens about their past, saying it's okay to not remember certain parts of their trauma, and it's just as okay to one day remember it. If Logan needs a hug, they give it, if he needs quiet, they give it, if he's about to go out, Reader warns him to not chase stray cats or to jump headfirst into the unknown (the teens find it strange, and so does Logan, up until when Logan destroys the remains of the Weapon X labs and connects the dots Reader knows more than he does about his past, yet he's not mad, just worried about what they saw...)

H*ll, Reader even sees the past of Sabretooth during a mission where they fought the Acolytes and end up in a cave-in, and all they can do is stare at him with sad, haunted eyes and apologize for what he lost and what he's had to go through (the Acolytes think it's creepy at first, Magneto is suspicious, and at first Sabretooth is angry- until Reader reveals they know his life was hard, and they don't know the depth of how it feels, but they know what it feels like to be abandoned, and it isn't fair, even to him... and surprisingly he let's Reader walk away unscathed...) (Xavier and Storm and Logan then decide to keep Reader away from the more deadly adult members of the Brotherhood, in case their powers aren't as welcomed the next time...)

(You can bet if Reader says something, after awhile the teens start to listen and try to go down what they think is the right path... Of course, Reader is trying to stay on the path where everyone is happy and okay and alive, which is hard, considering how traumatized everyone else is, and how scared they are to lose the people they view as family... which does include Reader...)

[hina-hina]

Omg could u write headcanons of how alejandro takes care of an injured reader during battle/a mission?

Just him being so worried and reader trying to calm him down even though they're literally bleeding out?

Thanks in advance, if not, thanks for ur time tho!! Have a lovely day/night :))

This was such a cute request, I hope you like it!! Thank you for requesting!! o(^▽^)o

Thanks to everyone for understanding about not uploading yesterday and for anyone that cares to know, I have passed all my finals/classes! I wish all of those the best of luck with their exams and to enjoy their time off! Love you all ❤

Also, big thanks for 300 followers! I'm so thankful you all like what I write and thank you for all your support!

|| Alejandro With an Injured Reader ||

Warnings: Some gore and blood, a little angst, non-graphic dipictions of injuries

Gender-Neutral!Reader // Romantic

For this request, I imagine your a relatively new member to Los Vaqueros

He was quite hard on you but that was because he actually did find you very attractive but he didn't want a situation like with Valeria to happen again

So he was often very cold and distant with you but that was just because he didn't want to get attached

So, when the two of you get seperated from the other Vaqueros, he knows he's completely screwed

The two of you duck into an old, abandoned house to hide from the enemy troops closing in

He was quickly trying to get back into contact with the rest of your team when he noticed your slow, sluggish movements and hand wrapped tightly around your middle

He knows the two of you are infinitely more fucked

"Are you hurt? Show me."

He is immediately at your side, supporting your weight as he lowers you down to lean against a nearby wall

With his urging, you pull your bloody hand away from the gunshot wound in your abdomen

"Shit..."

You glance down at the wound then back up at Alejandro, muttering with half-lidded eyes, "Colonel, you need to go and find the others before they find us."

"No," he says it immediately, pressing his hand onto the bleeding wound and trying to ignore your pained hiss, "No one gets left behind, vaquera/vaquero."

He quickly rifles through his vest, pulling out a stim shot

The voices of the enemy troops was getting louder and he knew they didn't have much time left

He drops his voice to a whisper, "This is going to hurt like a bitch, but you need to keep quiet. Here-"

He offers up his gloved hand, encouraging you to bite down before he gives you the stim shot

He uses a bit of cloth to pack into the wound and hauls you up off the ground

After the stim shot, your much more awake and aware, helping him take out enemy troops when he can

Eventually you make it back to the others, him immediately shouting out to them that you needed a medic

Others on your team began swarming you, pulling you away and he can't help the way his hands linger on your injured form

He watches as your helped into the helo to get further medical assistance from the medics

Rudy comes up and clasped a comforting hand onto Alejandro's shoulder, "They're going to be ok, amigo."

All he can do is nod as his gaze lingers on you while he loads into the helo as well

When they get back to base, he is immediately going to the medical ward to see you

Your sitting in one of the beds, rid of your tactical gear and in civvies

He tries to keep it professional, he really does

He strolls into the room, hands clasped politely behind his back as he watches the medic finish up bandaging your stitches

You perk up when you notice him standing by the door, "Colonel."

For once in his life, he doesn't know what to say as his eyes fixate on your bandaged wound

He settles for a respectful nod

The medic, noticing the obvious tension, looks between the two of you before excusing themselves

The two of you sit in awkward silence for a moment before you motion to the empty space on the bed, "You could... Sit? If you wanted..."

It frightens him how he doesn't think he would refuse anything you asked of him in that moment

He sits after a moment, quietly admitting, "I'm glad your ok."

"Thank you," You stare at him for a moment before biting your lip, slowly grabbing his hand in yours, "Thank you for not leaving me behind."

He is shocked

He doesn't understand because he had been so awful to you before

He likes it nonetheless

He looks at you and the two of you make eye contact

and he just doesn't care anymore

All the things that had been holding him back before crumble as he moves in slowly, one large hand coming up to rest against your cheek as he give you plenty of time to stop him

You don't, leaning up to meet him halfway as the two of you kiss softly

It was a small kiss but when he pulls away, he presses his forehead to yours and admits quietly to being scared of losing you

The two of you sit like that for a while before you eventually have to seperate

He promises to take you on an actual date and woo the fuck outta you when you feeling better =￣ω￣=

[joocomics]

who gives u subby vibes in xdh o.o

oh god my favorite question ♡ this is going to be a MESS i apologise in advance

jooyeon

this doesn’t even need introduction, he’s sooooo subby it hurts 😣 ok, i see him being a switch, but when he’s a sub he’s a SUB yk?? just say what you want he’ll do anything, and he’ll do it with his cock throbbing

let’s imagine it… i can see him dominating at first. the make out session is HEATED. he dominates you through kisses, through touching - his hands are everywhere all at once, trough dirty talk - he can’t shut up about how bad he needs you rn. then through oral, cause his favorite thing is face fucking >< he loves having you on your knees, while he thrusts deep inside your throat, talking about how good he’s giving it to you, however then the switch happens! it’s like something unlocks in him and suddenly he’s pleading you to ride him, and cream all over his cock. another thing he loves abt this is that when you’re on top you use his body in all sorts of ways - you fuck him, you give him kisses, you give his mouth something to suck on, you bite his neck, you tug his hair, you allow him to have a great view of your body, and that makes him see literal stars. you can grip his neck a little if you’re into that

this is the moment you can get really nasty if you want, making him beg, not allowing him to cum, overstimulating him… he’s gonna be a whining mess, SO LOUD ohmygod, mock him for being so whiny, tell him everyone’s gonna hear how weak & desperate he is, deep down he’s having a great time

for jooyeon, when he switches it’s like he is giving his own power over to you? not sure how to explain it i hope you see my point

gunil

tough on the outside, but surprisingly can be subby on the inside!! something about sub gunil makes me so weak i cannot think straight. just the idea of having gunil submissive to you, knowing he can literally fuck your brains out in a headlock with those muscled arms… 🤐 it’s also something about the leader energy in him

anyways, i see him also a switch with the difference that he’s mostly dom… i feel like it really depends on his mood 😮‍💨 if he’s had a long day, he will lay down letting you do whatever you want to him, allowing you to be more creative if you want ~ and then for the rest of the week you’re his sex doll yk?

i feel like he’s into overstimulation - giving & rec - he’s good with baring the pain and honestly if you’re having fun, then he’s having fun too, it’s important for him to do the things you want to do 🥹 i can also see him chuckling while you tie him up or cover up his eyes, pinch & bite his nipples - the thing is he simply gets turned on by seeing how excited you get to play with him and his body, and he really cares abt fulfilling your needs, so he doesn’t mind repressing his desires from time to time

junhan

subsubsub! and when i say that i don’t mean he doesn’t have a dom side to him, he does take control from time to time too, probably 👀 but junhan is the type of sub that you can go all out with

KINKY, ok! tell him something you wanna try, he’s already thought of trying it way before you. he has fantasies that you’re gonna have so much fun playing out it’s mind blowing. no public play tho, just the two of you in the bedroom with you on top, watching him melt under your control

i also have a feeling that by being a sub junhan also feels useful, it’s important for him that you share this trust with each other, and he’s able to fulfill your needs and services, while on the other hand you get so turned on by seeing him being so in love with you, cause he really needs real connection in order to be submissive, fully letting go of his control ~

ugh i can see him doing so many things for you - roleplay, filming stuff, bondage, dropping to the floor to eat you out with his hands behind his back when he’s allowed only to dry hump, letting you jerk him off till he pass out, the list goes on…

[whumpshaped]

i... .. fitz. u know the gist. im insane abt him. fitz and alexander both belong to the lovely @oliversrarebooks

tw vampire whumper, multiple whumpers, carewhumpers tho, stockholm syndrome, manipulation, mind control

Rye knew they were supposed to be feeling something as they watched Fitz and Alexander on the couch, cuddling and being affectionate with each other in a way neither of them had ever been with them. They knew, because they’d felt it before, and they had an inkling in the back of their mind that it was an entirely human emotion, something normal, something any person would’ve felt in a situation like this… but they just couldn’t remember. 

The feeling was still there, buried under thick layers of enthrallment and conditioning. It didn’t leave them alone. Rye tilted their head and opened their mouth to say something, to… what were they trying to say?

Fitz glanced up from where he was splayed across Alexander’s lap, as though only just now noticing the thrall in the doorway. “Oh, Rye. Nice timing.”

They suddenly shut their mouth, immediately placated by the shallow praise. They walked over without question when Fitz gestured to them, little sparks of hope filling their heart and making it beat just a little quicker. Would they be allowed on the couch? Would they be allowed some affection too? 

“I was getting a little peckish.”

All that hope came crashing down as Fitz sat up to be able to feed, and Rye could suddenly place the mystery emotion quite well and clearly. Jealousy. They were jealous of whatever the two vampires had. They were jealous of being wanted for something other than their blood. They were jealous of being wanted at all, of being…

Fitz gently wrapped his fingers around their wrist, and their head was empty before their body hit the couch’s soft cushion. “You don’t have any problems with me feeding, do you?” he asked, and Rye couldn’t imagine why they would’ve done anything other than shake their head.

“Of course not, sir. Please, drink as much as you like.”

Fitz grinned. “I figured as much. But I just had to ask, since you looked so upset.” He lifted their hand, and Rye watched their wrist get nearer and nearer those fangs in a fascinated trance. They weren’t excited, per se, but they were definitely looking forward to the bite. “But surely, that was entirely unrelated to Lex and I having a leisurely evening to ourselves. Yes?”

Rye didn’t take their eyes off their wrist in Fitz’s hold. “Yes, sir. Entirely unrelated.”

“You could easily reassure them that they’re wanted,” Alexander interjected. “Which they are.”

“I could.” Fitz ran a thumb along the smooth skin of Rye’s wrist, still not taking any blood, merely soothing them until they couldn’t think of anything but providing it. “But we’ve had this conversation before, haven’t we?” he asked with a sweet, sweet smile, and Rye spoke without a second, or even a first thought.

“Yes, sir. We have.”

Alexander sighed, and if Rye had been any less enthralled, they might’ve picked up on some pity from the man. “Some things bear repeating.”

“Mhm. That they do.” Fitz leaned in a little, his smile endlessly condescending as he said, “Stop being so silly, Rye. Different people serve different purposes, you know that. Aren’t you happy you have a purpose?”

Alexander sighed again, even heavier, but it was drowned out by Rye’s enthusiastic, affirmative response. “Yes, sir, I am. I am happy. I’m so happy to be given a purpose, please, let me fulfill it.”

“I’d be cruel not to.” He finally bit down on their wrist, closing his eyes as he drank. Rye shuddered at the feeling, their own eyes fluttering halfway closed from the pleasant sensation. 

How silly they had been. They couldn’t even remember what had gotten them so worked up. Weren’t they content? Didn’t they have everything they could’ve asked for? They could feel Fitz’s satisfaction as he filled his stomach, and really, they couldn’t think of anything more they wanted from life than knowing they were pleasing him.

[byfulcrums]

@thebrainrotsreal HEY SORRY FOR TAGGING(? PINGING(? U, ITS ABOUT THE AU. I DIDN'T WANT TO MAKE THE OTHER POST THAT LONG LMAO

FLYING BEING NATURAL TO VILTRUMITES MY BELOVED

ASJDAJSD MARK TRYING TO GET AWAY W SLIGHTLY HOVERING(? IN A WAY THAT IS BARELY NOTICEABLE TO ANYONE BUT HE CAN'T DO IT WHILE HE WALKS BC HE JUST, DEFAULTS TO ACTUAL FLYING

mark and wasp are the same height, and they hate it almost as much as they hate each other. even if wasp is older than mark (read somewhere he could be 20, not sure tho), he'd still look 17 bc of the weird viltrumite aging thing

so basically they'll stay the same size for about 500 years. this is what nolan meant when he said mark would suffer...

ANYWAY. That thing abt them wanting to be taller than the other made me laugh and reminded me of a shadowpeach hc i posted on 2022(? LMAO

gonna use the same hc w them too

so. they're out as invincible (they still haven't decided on a name yet. wasp says he's stronger and therefore should be called invincible, but mark points out that he's the one in charge and also that this dimension is his. mark gets to keep it. they're still arguing about what to name wasp) ("why don't you just go by "vincible"?" "no.")

mark is talking to some gda agent or a cop or smth, when he notices that wasp (who is looking at the sky w the most bored expression he can muster, bc he genuinely doesn't understand why they have to talk to such inferior beings) seems to be just, a few milimeters taller than him (he may be shit at schoolwork, but if you hate someone enough you can notice the smallest details about them)

he, w/o stopping the conversation, answers to this by floating just a little higher, barely noticeable to the human eye

ofc, i said "human" eye

wasp notices. he flies higher

mark flies higher too

eventually he's screaming instead of talking bc of how far down the cop is

wasp laughs. now mark is screaming at him

they fight

ALSO WASP REFUSING TO STOP FLOATING AS A CIVILLAIN IS SO FUNNY AJDSHFASJ, IMAGINE THE AMOUNT OF TROUBLE HE'LL GET MARK INTO

PLS. THEM TRYING TO GNAW THEIR ARMS OFF BC THEY HATE BEING NEAR EACH OTHER SM ASJFHADJFH

most normal ppl r used to mark working alone as invincible. so since wasp really doesn't do interviews and he's usually too fast to see when he fights, no one really knows what his name even is

and everyone is used to invincible being. well. invincible. sure, the news say that when he's around this guy he gets a little meaner, but it can't be that bad!

it is that bad

wasp says smth mean n sarcastic. everyone expects invincible to answer w something equally sarcastic, but not as mean (maybe making fun of how his suit looks). they do not expect invincible to just fucking bite him after 8 of those comments

wasp keeps trying to kill This One Kid, who is either super brave or super stupid and won't stop asking him questions (they go from "what's your name?" to "what underwear do you have? do you even need underwear?" in a matter of seconds) for his weird school diary thingy

he can't get close, bc mark starts pulling the other way. besides, they're stuck together, and killing people would seem awfully annoying if it's with this guy

they can't punch each other, so wasp bites him. they bite each other a lot bc of the "no punching (or kicking)" thing

"Wasp throws a car at Mark which Mark instinctively swats away and then goes flying after it to prevent it from slamming into a building. Wasp cackles so hard it gets hit by a laser beam to the throat by some other bad guy." ASJDSAJDHDSJFAH YES THAT'S SO FUNNY

they mess w each other sm

it's funny bc they do the same things to annoy each other (wasp throwing a car at mark, mark hitting him with a tree, etc) , but lose their shit when the other does it to them

they're basically this:

mark, sleep deprived, flies straight into a lamp post

wasp laughs at him. he actually laughs so hard he runs into the same lamp post

there are a lot of compilations on youtube that is just them laughing at each other mid fight and running into things or being hit w stuff the other throws at them

they grow more wild every time

it goes from throwing cars, to throwing real life dinosaurs (mark doesn't want to talk about it) (wasp absolutely does)

"Cecil remarks Mark handled something well and he looks like Cecil just told him his entire family got slaughtered."

THISSS

"you did well today. hella efficient, quick and straight to the point. who taught you that?"

mark: D:

and also,

"oh, wow. you saved an entire family and their cat from a villain that wanted to turn them into zombies while mark was off fighting the bad guys? that's great!"

and wasp. cries

"oh no, no, you think I'm gonna help you?" THIS TISHTISHTSIHIST

this really feels like smth he'd say in canon. he'd say it w a smile, half-shocked half just pretending out of amusement

he'd laugh too

it's the same type of cocky tone of voice sinister mark/wasp used when teasing angstrom

"I gotta imagine if they tackle things separately, they are also allowing each other to do they want and like to do?" YEAH!!

it's hard 'cause wasp always wants to take the bad guys on alone, but mark also likes to fight (just not w the same brutality) and he doesn't want to be just a lifeguard

it takes wasp a while (a LONG while) to stop tackling mark when he's about to attack to get to the enemy himself, or to kick mark into the next country, etc etc etc

but eventually they settle on mark getting everyone to safety while wasp stalls the bad guy. then, after he's sure no one's here anymore, they both fight the villain together

or uh. they try. sometimes they'll start fighting each other too so it's less of a 1 v 2 fight and more of a... 1v1 V another 1 fight lol

"Mark's own reaction that truly confirms it to be true"

he gets the episode 8 levels of anger and anguish

HE'S JUST SO MAD

wasp is talking shit on tv and he just loses it

he immediatly flies off and tackles wasp into fucking space

i mean, they do say that actions say more than words, right?

mark is usually making the typical superhero noises when he's fighting, but now? he's just focusing all of his anger into This One Motherfucker

wasp loves it

it's a "see? i knew you had it in you!" type of moment

he's been longing for a real fight for a WHILE

they don't kill each other but it comes close

see, the things is. they are the same person. it's easy to start viewing them as two separate beings, but they're really. not

they're evenly matched in everything

this is why wasp likes fighting mark

this is why mark doesn't like fighting wasp (never ending battles are boring to him) ( he likes to win more than to fight. i mean it's not like he enjoys getting beat up)

we could dive deeper and start talking about the self-destructive tendency these two have to getting beat up. i mean, wasp's idea of a real, actually enjoyable fight is when the other is either able to beat him, or when he can kill ppl. and mark spends sm time out as invincible, neglecting his social life and mental health to the point he quits college, and he gets beat up a lot while doing it. so yeah--

self-destructive tendencies

"-having to confront he sees the exact thing in Wasp to a slightly different degree" i will ALWAYS love making them deal with the constant reminders that they're the same person

they deal w stuff in similar ways but to different degrees and realizing that gives them psychic damage like that magic squirrel in mca so they just preted they don't exist

unless it's to like. bring the other to their side

"you like fighting too. violence is in you, it's part of you. you're always covered in blood. all that's left, would be your hands" VS "you're me, and i'm you. we have similar thoughts, and that means i- y'know. but it means you are, too. you have a chance. and get that blood off you-- you need a shower"

COMICS!! AND!! WASP!!

yeah

HIM HAVING TO CONFRONT THE FACT THAT THE DESTROYING OF HIS WORLD HURT HIM TOO

because it is, in a way, his world too

he grew up in it. raised differently, yes, but still on earth

he was always different from the rest, getting his powers at an early age and all, but it's still the place he grew up in

not all the memories from it can be bad, right?

ANDDDDD... wasp reminding ppl of how strong he is regularly

"i could pull out your spine in a second." he says that out of nowhere, in a conversation that would've seemed normal to literally anyone else. he says it like it's nothing much. "i could kill you." you know he could, but you still wonder

would he? with how he is, with his inability to escape --- would he?

also he has fun when he watches the color drain from their faces

"Rudy has psychological profiles on all his friends he regularly updates like a diary, and he has one for himself too." NO BUT THIS IS SO IN CHARACTER FOR HIM

wasp talks shit about mark to anyone avaliable and rudy is no exception. even tho he finds him deeply annoying

honestly wasp is capable of doing p much anything to mess with mark

HE JST WOULD

the self-hatred is strong with this one too master!!! (sw ref again lol)

ASDJASJDSJAD THE BETTING POOL

wasp saying mark breathes annoyingly is such a sibling thing tho. "why are you chewing like that" "stop biting your stupid fork" "the way you cut your food is so weird" "your handwriting sucks, don't hold the pencil like that" etc etc etc

ANDD "he knew what wasp was going to say" DUDE YES??

he's talking and he gets. a feeling. and he turns to wasp, who is opening his mouth, and says "don't you fucking dare"

same w wasp. mark is annoying little shit too sometimes, he's also a teenager. so he infuriates wasp too

mark calls him a hypocrite

THE TWIN TERRORS OF HEROISM I CAN'T

imagine if ppl actually start calling them that tho

one day wasp calls mark to their? his? room and is like, "holy shit look at this" and shows him their? his computer

mark doesn't understand, until he sees the title and image of the video

"the twin terrors of heroism, terrorizing the terrorists once again" and its a picture of them kicking ass

"twin terrors of-- oh, come on, really?" "yes" "they couldnt have at least called us the invincibles or something?" "that'd be even worse" "...alright, i'll give you that" "..." "...." "they think we're like the fucking mauler twins" "oh you have got to be--"

ALSO this is so funny, them being like "mark/wasp" when they show up hurt or smth. everyone just learning to accept it. i mean what are they going to do. fight against two gods??

ha

AND YES YES YES DO TAG ME IN IT!!!! if i make anything about this au (posts, fics, drawings, u name it) i will tag u too

alcohol doesn't really affect viltrumites i think, but there has got to be something that gets them drunk

nolan could've taught wasp how to make it. if the ingredients are on earth, then he would maybe try to prepare it on mark's earth. mark shows up and sees that he's drunk. he goes "nope" and gets drunk too, maybe on accident maybe not. debbie shows up and sees her two superpowered sons sobbing over a bowl of popcorn

alternate version: gasoline gets them drunk

[thatdeadaquarius]

I just reread your Language Barrier AU and the ballpoint where reader was pissed because these fuckers just couldn't help but talk like Zhongli-

MINCE YOUR WORDS.

IN ONE SENTENCE.

PREFERABLY 5 WORDS OR LESS.

EXPLAIN IT TO ME LIKE I'M RAZOR.

Argh, God. I'm getting mad just thinking about it. 😤 Imagine in a fight and these dudes just sttaight up blurted a fucking 5 book-length, hard bounded soliloquy- I cannot-

No, Venti, Kazuha. You cannot use Haikus-

No, Cyno, you cannot use jokes either- but that is debatable-

And Oh. My. God. I kept thinking about when fighting and y'all kept throwing words (like when using a skill) and I'm just here standing, bracing myself SO HARD trying not to laugh (also irl). And then maybe now and then some mistranslation on Reader's mind since they use JP VA since the start of Genshin (assuming they play?) are new to Teyvat's Language:

'One with the Floor!'

One with the what?

'Shake your ass, sir!'

Cue spitting tea-

(Sorry, that's just me mishearing things 💀) But like at those times, Reader is the one dying of laughter lol. Imagine them explaing to Beidou that they thought she said 'Power of the ending Hotdog' instead of 'Power that ended Haishan'.

Aight, imma just.. go.

*imma send this anonymously because im shy, but do know that I love bread 🥖

Also @2:20

For you 🤲🥨🍩🥧🥐all the bread for the superior ask, anon

I could definitely see myself saying "ONE SENTENCE. U HAVE TO RESPOND IN ONE SENTENCE ONLY." then they manage to still make it a whole 40 word sentence 💀

^^ Confused Bakugou gif is literally u being shocked bc u keep mishearing everyones bursts on the battlefield LMAO SHAKE UR ASS SIR THAT ONE TOOK ME TF OUT ANON

☆

"Speed of Bite!" (Keqing's Speed of Light lol)

"I will have whore her!" (Zhongli's I will have order 😭)

"Time for... Execution!" (Diluc's time for retribution lol)

...

You in the background like: 🧍‍♂️... tfs wrong with yall, u glitched??

◇

They're like, physically incapable of making your kind of simple blunt sentences

Like i think some people would get close: Albedo, Xinyan, Klee, Qiqi, Sayu (rlly likes it bc it lets them be lazier), Cyno (maybe at first but then he would like, explain for 10 min after every simple sentence what he meant like his jokes 😭), Hu Tao, Heizou, Lumine/Aether, Xiao (can kinda get close but he gets frustrated and then rants for 30 minutes lmao), Razor (holds the title for the closest to your simple speech,👏👏LMAO PPL ACCIDENTALLY THINKING HES A GOD)

♤

People who will never get it, not even if ur in battle & ur life depends on it LMAO:

Zhongli (he rlly wants to but habits over thousands of years r hard to break 🙏 rip), Yun Jin, Xingqiu, Kuni/Babygirl, Venti, Kazuha, Sucrose, Shenhe, Kokomi, Ei, Nahida (tho it was a valiant effort), Noelle, Alhaitham, Sara, Ningguang (she doesnt want to even try lol), Mona, Fischl, Jean, Ganyu, Eula, Barbara, Diluc + Kaeya (unsurpringly both of them are tied for being the worst attempts at speaking simply 💀, guess its just that fancy etiquette training, its too hard to break) 😔

♡

Yeah, ur pretty much begging the ppl who can get close to ur speech to constantly translate everyone else

Rest in peace traveler, theyre like the first person u turn to,

(Paimon is also kinda bad at speaking simply, closest shes gotten is when she demands food lol)

☆

Idk how good this was, but THANK U FOR THE ASK AGAIN I AM ALWAYS READY TO HEAR OTHERS MAKE MY BRAINROT WORSE OVER LANGUAGE GENSHIN <3

ALSO I CANT BELIEVE U SENT ME THAT CYNO JOKES VIDEO PLEASE ITS SO LONG IT WAS SO FUNNY I STILL HAVENT WATCHED THE FULL THING

Feel free to send another in whenever i love talking to yall ♡

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

♡ the beloveds:

@karmawonders

✨️✨️✨️✨️💖✨️✨️✨️✨️