#im trying to engage in good faith here

[deslizada]

I will repeat myself: if you are campaigning for biden now, before he has called for a ceasefire, you are giving not only him but the entire democratic party a blank check to murder Palestinians. this is unequivocally what you are doing. if you do every reasonable thing you can to pressure him (including voting uncommitted in the primary!) and you're still stuck choosing between him and trump in November, that's one thing, but actively campaigning for him now? you are underwriting the genocide in the name of self-preservation.

[immaterial-girl]

ill stare. directly. at the sun. but never. in the mirror

[sembulapeyalneerpol]

i am curious is it just one person sending me these asks about these hot takes around caste, like i am genuinely confused by some of these questions like i have 1 maybe 200 followers on this blog and i do not do any of my organizin gon here, share a couple articles and boost when i can but ??? how are you going to ask me if someone is who is caste privileged can be a periyarist??????

[spacelazarwolf]

i know you’re not my therapist but i see some people asking you for advice so i hope this is okay, feel free to ignore it: just… the way transmascs and transmasc issues are treated by society at large is really getting to me and affecting my mental health. even trying to access “trans” resource centers or resources in general and they’re geared primarily towards transfems or they see that im not a trans woman and their tone towards me completely shifts in a negative way, transmasc issues at large being willfully ignored, i mean just about the only place i see anyone talk about them without immediately getting attacked is on tumblr and even then the conversations get shut down. I’m scared to talk about feeling alienated as a trans man with a therapist because i’m scared of them shutting me down even though thats the exact opposite of what therapists are supposed to do. it just feels like people don’t even want us to exist. my mental health is reeeally suffering because of this and i feel like i can’t talk about this to anyone. like… there has to be a way it gets better right?

it absolutely does get better. in terms of online experience, use the block button liberally. it's something i'm trying to do better about myself, just not giving people the time of day who won't engage in good faith. my block list must be a whole archive by now.

in terms of in person experience, i was really surprised by how many other trans men and trans mascs immediately opened up when i brought up the feelings of isolation i was struggling with. it's definitely something that's still taboo to talk about, but if you find those spaces where you can just sit down and talk candidly, it's a really healing experience. if you need to kind of dip your toe in first to see how they'll react, that's fine, but seriously i was shocked when i started connecting with more trans men and trans mascs in my area and there was this immediate, huge sigh of relief when i tentatively brought up those topics. i've also talked to a lot of trans women and trans femmes and nonbinary people in general irl who are very receptive as well, and often open up about the ways it affects them as well. there's more of us out here who want things to get better than tumblr dot com would have us believe.

[leolingo]

(long post about purgatory and meta and rp)

sigh one thing ive been thinking is that it feels a bit unfair to see so many people complaining or doomposting over how purgatory affects the overarching qsmp rp story or how it ~interrupted arcs~ or is ~disturbing current storylines~ or ~narratively unsatisfying~ like. Sure. its a bit abrupt and most players were caught off guard because lore-wise it stems from the federation which means none of them were told about anything beforehand

but... its only been three days. maybe we could have a little faith? like idk ill be soooooo out there rn and say that maybe the admins did this now for a reason. maybe itll make sense later on. we already see lore repercussions with elquackity and his motives and all the nods to the eggs.

theres fair criticism to be made (when done respectfully) if youre mainly here for the roleplay but i feel like we sometimes need to remind ourselves that the qsmp storytelling is a VERY ambitious project. lmao. imagine being the writing team and trying to wrangle 20+ characters with distinct points of view and journeys on an ever-changing story because of the very nature of live rp. its practically IMPOSSIBLE to tie up every loose end neatly and at this point i dont think we should expect that. keeping up momentum with all plotlines must also be pretty hard, cc's schedules and outside factors like server programming and building and mod tweaking and all those meta elements considered and so on and so on

i DO also want the story to move forward and be cohesive and make sense in a satisfactory way. like i really do!!!!!!! but i try to understand that thats not ALL the qsmp is about. from the start quackity said the server wouldn't be exclusive to the rp aspect. it sure is that way right now, but thats because most of the active members are VERY passionate about roleplaying. thats a good thing! they have fun and its fun to watch and the experience is mostly good for everyone because it corresponds to their expectations to an extent

the thing about purgatory is that i feel like its a lot more meta than most people doomposting realize. it ties into the story, sure, but to me it feels like the sudden switch in environment and vibes and stakes isnt actually catered to the rp and thats FINE. like thats not what it exists for and thats fineeeeeee

pac for one has said he appreciates the event for the change of pace, though its very hard (lol), because regular qsmp was starting to feel a bit stale to him and he was kind of running out of things to do. THATS A GREAT THING! managing player engagement like that is awesome and sometimes necessary. YES, purgatory caters to a very different playstyle than what we're used to -- and thats one of its strenghts.

a lot of hispanic creators have also felt this!!!! roier, rivers and carre most prominently have been VERY excited about this event because its similar in format to a lot of spanish speaking events like mc extremo and such. a lot of these players are also not particularly interested in rp-ing and had not been logging on very often prior to purgatory.

even roleplay regulars like tubbo, fit and bbh have shown interest in purgatory for the competitive nature of the setting!!! thats cool too!!!! something different, new possibilities to play around with. thats what the events should be about. kudos to the admins and dev teams for attempting it in such a big scale. their effort shows and all the mechanics weve seen are really fucking cool

i love the roleplay!!!!!! its one of my favorite parts of the qsmp!!!!!! but its not ALL there is and it shouldnt be! non rp-oriented creators are also part of the project and deserve to have a little fun too -- not to mention a big chunk of the hispanic fan community that has blown up twitter with support bc what we have rn is similar to events they already love!!!!!!! im glad to see so many of them get excited again!!!!!!

at the end of the day, qsmp is a LONG long term project, and purgatory ends in two weeks. by the time its over, we can all choose to engage with it as we wish. it can be a big filler episode in your mind, if you want. it can be just for fun..... otherwise, if its not fun, your regularly scheduled qsmp will be back soon anyway :3 its fine to not like it, its fine to have something negative to say about it if properly tagged and not like. crazy entitled or blown out of proportion for what this situation is.

i just hope we can all manage our online experiences accordingly and avoid making things less enjoyable for each other. this is supposed to be fun

[traumacatholic]

Can you please pray for me im suffering too much and i am very suicidal. Thank you so so much. <3

Of course, may God bless you and have mercy on you. May He send you the comfort and strength that you need. Please also do try your best to reach out to people in your life about this, preferably a doctor if possible or look into a mental health support service that you can call or send an email to. It's always a good idea to have multiple forms of support that are aware of how you're currently feeling. And charitable mental health resources might be able to help you to engage with accessible resources and support. I know that at least here, some of them do offer workshops or free counselling and support that you can access.

I'm going to attach some prayers under the read more, hopefully some of them will be of help to you. Please also check my mental health tag, as I do share a lot of workbooks and other resources and apps that you might find beneficial to engage with. A lot of these resources are free.

Prayer against Depression: Prayer to the Mother of God

O my beloved Queen, my hope, O Mother of God, protector of orphans and protector of those who are hurt, the saviour of those who perish, and the consolation of all who are in distress: Thou seest my misery, thou seeset my sorrow and my loneliness. Help me; I am powerless. Give me strength. Thou knowest what I suffer, thou knowest my grief. Lend me thy hand, for who else can be my hope but thee, my protector and my intercessor before God? I have sinned before thee and before all people. Be thou my Mother, my consoler, my helper. Protect me and save me; chase grief away from me; chase away my lowness of heart and my despondency. Help me, O Mother of my God!

Prayer against Depression and Sorrow

O Greatly-merciful Master, Lord Jesus Christ, have mercy on me and cleanse me from every sadness and disturbance and cowardice. Drive away from me every spiritual choking and demonic sorrow, that I sense in my body and my soul. For You are our Joy, and the Hope of all the ends of the earth, and those far off at sea. Be merciful to me, O Master, upon my sins. Take from me the heavy burden of sin and despair. Drive far away from me every sadness and laziness. Confirm me in Your Love, and with unassailable hope and unshakable faith in You, through the intercessions of Your Spotless Mother, and all Your Saints. Amen.

Prayer for Mental Health

O Master, Lord my God, in Whose hands is my destiny: Help me according to Thy mercy, and leave me not to perish in my transgressions, nor allow me to follow them who place desires of the flesh over those of the spirit. I am Thy creation; disdain not the work of Thy hands. Turn not away; be compassionate and humiliate me not, neither scorn me, O Lord, as I am weak. I have fled unto Thee as my Protector and God. Heal my soul, for I have sinned against Thee. Save me for Thy mercy's sake, for I have cleaved unto Thee from my youth; let me who seeks Thee not be put to shame by being rejected by Thee for mine unclean actions, unseemly thoughts, and unprofitable remembrances. Drive away from me every filthy thing and excess of evil. For Thou alone art holy, alone mighty, and alone immortal, in all things having unexcelled might, which, through Thee, is given to all that strive against the devil and the might of his armies. For unto Thee is due all glory, honor and worship: To the Father, and to the Son, and to the Holy Spirit, now and ever, and unto ages of ages. Amen (source)

Prayer to St. Anastasia the Greatmartyr

O holy saint Anastasia, healer and minister to captives, who did suffer greatly as a martyr while relieving the suffering of the poor and the sick, pray for us who are ill in soul and in body. Relieve us by your intercessions from the illnesses of our minds, from all evil temptation that seeks to disturb us, and from the suffering of our many afflictions. We ask these things boldly of you as you boldly approach the throne of our Lord Jesus Christ who alone is the Healer and Lover of Mankind. Amen.

Your lamb Anastasia, calls out to You, O Jesus, in a loud voice: ‘I love You, my Bridegroom, and in seeking You I endure suffering. In baptism, I was crucified so that I might reign in You, and I died so that I might live with You. Accept me as a pure sacrifice, for I have offered myself in love.’ Through her prayers save our souls, since You are merciful.

Prayers to Saint Dymphna (These can be said individually, or you could put them all together)

I turn to you, dear virgin and martyr, confident of your power with God and of your willingness to take my cause into your hands. I praise and bless the Lord for giving you to us as patron of the nervous and emotionally disturbed. I firmly hope that through your kind intercession He will restore my lost serenity and peace of mind. May He speak to my heart and reassure me: "My peace I give you. Let not your heart be troubled nor let it be afraid." Pray for me, dear St. Dymphna, that my nervous and emotional turmoil may cease, and that I may again know serenity and personal peace. Amen.

I appeal to you in my illness, dear St. Dymphna. I would be so grateful for a total and happy recovery, for the blessed gift of health in every fiber of my being. May the Lord Jesus, who mercifully healed the sick during His earthly days, have pity on me and make me well again. Ask Him to command sickness to depart and grant me a full measure of health, that I may rejoice in giving Him glory and praise. Amen.

Glorious St. Dymphna, you are the patron of the nervous and emotionally disturbed. I am certain, however, that your charity embraces everyone. I am certain that you lend a listening ear to any prayer offered for any special need. You will, I am sure, take my problem to heart and pray for me that it may be happily settled. (Here mention your special problem or difficulty.) You will plead for me and obtain the help I need. Already I offer you my sincere and grateful thanks, so great is my confidence that God will hear and answer your prayers. Amen. St. Dymphna, Virgin and Martyr, pray for us. St. Dymphna, patron of nervous and emotional illnesses, pray for us. St. Dymphna, crowned for the glory in heaven, pray for us. St. Dymphna, faithful to your covenant with Christ, pray for us. St. Dymphna, precious in the eyes of the Lord, pray for us. St. Dymphna, our helper in every need, pray for us. St. Dymphna, our friend at heave's court, pray for us.

[oh-judas]

HEY TUMBLR!!! I MADE A DISCORD SERVER FOR QUEER CHRISTIANS!!!

why are you doing this?

bc i’m a dyke & a christian, & i’m sick of trying to choose between those identities in queer & christian spaces. so i’m making my own queer christian space where no one has to choose between their queer identity & their faith!

wow, who can join? 

this server is open to queer people who are looking for a christian space, christians who are looking for a queer space, & anyone who wants to engage in a queer christian community. i will also take a moment to state: this server is a safe space for POC & all queer identities.

who canNOT join? 

transmisogynists/terfs 

anyone bigoted towards other religions (anti-semites, islamophobes, etc) 

zionists/pro-israel people 

anyone who likes trump 

racists

anyone pro-life  

people in the above groups will NOT be tolerated in the server. they will be kicked immediately upon proving they belong in one (or more) of the above groups. 

what are you going to do in this server? 

i’ve made a bunch of channels to encourage discussion across a broad range of topics! the channels are 

queerness

christianity

prayer requests

bible study

gratitude

visual arts

music

literature & poetry 

memes

pets

questions & advice

in addition, i’m hoping we could have a few events in the server where we could have bible studies, share art, or just chat about the experience of being a queer christian. bc this server is so new, i'm willing to listen to any suggestions about new channels & events!

any requirements for being in the server?

you MUST be at least 16 years old or over to be in this server. in addition, there are minor & adult roles. you don’t have to state your exact age, but for everyone’s comfort, i’d like to distinguish between them. other than that, it’s ENCOURAGED that you’re a queer christian, but hey, if you’re just curious about the community & want to join IN GOOD FAITH, then you’re welcome <3

what's so great about this server?

this server is a beautiful space for queer christians to bond over whatever crosses our minds, from missionaries to Jesus Christ Superstar to handmade rosaries & veils. & im not just saying that bc it's my server & i made it, i'm saying that bc this server has genuinely become a bright space in my life & my new friend's lives. i hope to meet you there soon <3

here’s the link! i hope to see you there >:) <3 (pls dm me if the link isn't working! i'll fix it here & send it to you too)

i'd really appreciate it if yall could share this server, even if you don't join! there are so few queer christian communities in the world, but i'd like to add to that number. thanks team!

[apas-95]

obligatory "im trying to engage in good faith & understand better not starting an argument etc"

im looking at https://www.tumblr.com/apas-95/743796369906597888/ and i really appreciate the explanation, but im a little skeptical of the argument that classism is the root of oppression, even by the way you explain it (as the historical cause of all other forms of oppression, as opposed to some kind of super oppression that all others are subordinate to)

in particular, misogyny and ableism both seem to me to be forms of oppression that predate capitalism, even if their current form has undoubtedly been shaped by it. im definitely not an expert in history, but my understanding is that patriarchy has been a feature of many societies pre-capitalism.

and i suppose there are points you could debate on historical ableism (like idk all the things ppl did vs didnt do to accommodate different disabilities esp with their limited technology), but at the very least my understanding is that myths of "changelings" - fairies who replace your child but are "clearly not human" in their behaviour and affect - originate as an interpretation of developmental disabilities, which seems like fairly cut and dry bigotry to me.

is there a reason im wrong about this? is there something ive misunderstood about your original explanation?

ty if youve read this whole thing, i appreciate you taking the time.

there's a lot to be said here on the specific ways 'disabled people' as a coherent social class only came into existence with the advent of industrial labour and wage timekeeping (whereas before disabled individuals would be integrated into existing systems of familial, communal, and slavery production, rather than excluded from them), but there's evidently a more fundamental misunderstanding that should be addressed - capitalism is not the origin of political-economic classes, capitalism is just one form of class society. classes existed in the feudal era, they existed in the ancient slave states, and yes, thereby, classes (and the systems derived from them, like patriarchy) predate capitalism specifically.

if you want to learn more, I'd suggest reading some introductory communist theory, like Principles of Communism, or the Manifesto of the Communist Party

[queer-muslim-culture-is]

Welcome to queer-muslim-culture-is !

[PT: Welcome to queer-muslim-culture-is !]

My goal here is to foster a sense of community and to share queer muslim experiences, struggles, and joy. This blog is largely run on your asks, so dont be shy sending them in. I'll also routinely reblog art, resources, and general positivity

While the blog is run mainly in english, I'm fluent in arabic and will translate some posts I really like or for anons if necessary :]

MOD INFO

[PT: Mod Info]

Hiya ! You can call me Mod Amber (Anbar / 3anbar / عنبر) or Mod Ilyas (إلياس), it all works. My pronouns are he/she, ze/hir, and it/its. I'm a queer (mithliya), trans (3abir), and polyamorous north african

WHO'S WELCOME ON THIS BLOG ?

[PT: Who's welcome on this blog ?]

You don't have to be a queer muslim to follow, interact, ask questions, etc as long as you're respectful

I am a radical inclusionist (supportive of all good faith queer identities including the "contradictory" ones) and do not tolerate queerphobia, racism, ableism, pluralphobia or bigotry against any religions. I'm liberal with the block button and won't engage with blatant hatred

Blank blogs (no rbs, default pfp, etc) and fully nsfw blogs will be blocked. This is to try and reduce bot spam

*** Under the cut is accessibility info and the tagging system

[PT: Under the cut is accessibility info and the tagging system]

ACCESSIBILITY

[PT: Accessibility]

I greatly value accessibility, so on this blog I'll be :

Ensuring images and videos have descriptions (they might not always be perfect, but I'll try to have *some* kind of description for everything)

Adding plain text for colorful and non standard sized text

Adding appropriate trigger warnings to posts (including flashing lights if it ever comes up)

If you have suggestions on how to make this blog a more accessible place, please feel free to send me an ask or dm :]

TAGGING SYSTEM -- will be updated as necessary

[PT: Tagging System -- will be updated as necessary]

Main tags :

#queer muslim culture -- the regular asks

#not queer muslim culture -- everything else

#arabic -- anything that contains arabic writing, all posts include translations

Trigger tags :

#[trigger] -- e.g. #homophobia

#tw [trigger] -- e.g. #tw homophobia

"Queer muslim culture" includes :

#qmc pos -- for more positive asks

#qmc neg -- for more negative asks

*** Note : Not every ask will be sorted into one of these two tags. This tagging system is purely for filtering purposes and not meant to shame anyone. Im fully ok with asks about the painful parts of being a queer muslim, we're all in this together :]

"Not queer muslim culture" includes :

#blog update -- announcements, blog upkeep, etc

#art -- visual, written, etc

#media -- movies, shows, books, etc

#queer muslim experiences -- public personalities, pictures from events and protests, life stories, etc

#resources

#blog appreciation -- y'all sending me really sweet messages :']

#activism -- currently mostly palestine related, but possibly other stuff too

#positivity

[blueskittlesart]

what do you mean liking zelink gives you a cishet radar? If someone wants to think their pairing is cishet without bothering anyone, I don’t see the issue? I just need an explanation.

im going to go into this trying as hard as i can to believe that this ask was in good faith. ok. i am going to try so so so hard to be nice here.

the market is oversaturated with cishet pairings. assuming you are not asking this in bad faith and you consider yourself an ally to lgbt people, you have to at the very least understand that as a baseline. lgbt people of my generation have spent decades of their lives with cishet couples being their ONLY reference for romance in media. any time lgbt people WERE portrayed, they had to be immoral or condemned or somehow had their stories cut short.

the second point i need you to understand is that for lgbt people, we consider our romance and expression to be fundamentally different from yours. this is not an attempt at self-segregation or discrimination against cishet people, this is a tool for survival. at a certain point it became clear that we were never going to be mainstream, and that attempting to conform to mainstream ideas of romance was potentially DANGEROUS for us. lgbt romance that was palatable for cishet people ran the risk of turning violent for us when cishet people STOPPED perceiving us as palatable. this is why we say there's a difference between lgbt media written by cishets and lgbt media written by lgbt people--cishet people aren't ever quite able to pick up on the subtle ways in which we differentiate ourselves and our expression from theirs, but WE are, and media written by people who understand those differences is always going to feel SAFER to us than media that isn't.

this is what i mean when i say 'cishet radar.' being lgbt doesn't stop you from enjoying m/f pairings. being lgbt doesn't necessarily even stop you from being in an m/f relationship yourself. but being lgbt DOES alter the way you EXPERIENCE m/f relationships because of the difference in expression between cishet romance and lgbt romance. when you are lgbt, when you have trained your brain for your whole life to look for those differences as a tool for survival, m/f pairings that you can tell have been written with those differences in mind are always going to feel SAFER to you than pairings that have not.

there is nothing wrong with being cishet. there is nothing wrong with seeing characters as cishet. but it's concerning that your response to lgbt people expressing that they feel safer engaging with content that appeals to them and is written with their communities and their self-expression in mind is to take it as a personal attack. i never said anything was wrong with cishet readings of these characters, but i expressed that i feel safer avoiding content that i can recognize as a cishet reading of this pairing. you decided to take that personally. i think it's worth it to unpack why that is. do you feel uncomfortable when other people, independently from you, suggest that your favorite characters might be gay or trans? why might that be? lgbt readings of m/f pairings are a part of lgbt expression. lgbt expression is not an attack on cishet people. like you said, people are allowed to enjoy their paring their way "without bothering anyone."

[nereidprinc3ss]

how do you start building a following and getting people to read your fics i love yours sm it’s inspired me to write my own but idk how to get a reach out to people or even someone to just read it idk just feels like im talking to a void do you have any advice :(

ofc! this is gonna be a mess but here we go

first of all, if your blog is brand new, your post won’t show up in the tags, and second, the first five tags are the most important ones. so if your blog is brand new tumblr might think you’re a robot and have a sort of shadow ban on your content in which case you just need to post and be active on that blog for a while and let it get a few weeks old so that tumblr will recognize you as a real person and let your posts be seen.

in terms of tags use only the relevant ones and use the most relevant ones first, like if you’re posting spencer smut the first tag you’ll probably want to use is spencer reid smut.

(also just general tagging courtesy: if it’s not smut don’t tag it as smut, and don’t tag pure filth as fluff or angst. for x reader only tag the relevant character ie if it’s x spencer don’t tag it as x aaron hotchner!!)

engage with people!! reblog fics, respond to asks, stuff like that!! people wanna engage with nice fun people! be yourself!!! 😍🌈😁💕💐 (no but actually)

be patient too, fics don’t get like 1000 notes overnight. you kinda just have to stick to it because at first you just won’t probably get a lot of interaction. but don’t get discouraged if you’re not seeing super big numbers or getting tons of comments/asks right away, that just comes with time

the most important part (and this is gonna sound stupid) is to have fun! write what YOU want to write. if you’re solely posting to get as many notes as possible you’ll lose faith and probably go inactive pretty quickly. i started posting fic after months and months of reading it and being obsessed w the show, and i had ideas for scenarios that i was rlly excited to write!! not because i expected to get a bunch of notes. if numbers are your only motivation, you won’t stick to it, which means you’ll probably lose interest sooner and never get to that point where you’re getting a lot of rewarding engagement from the community.

also writing what you wanna write is super important because it will show in the quality! requests can be fun but you’re not a content machine, you’re someone with ideas of your own that you’d like to express.

and I can’t stress enough how important it is to write what YOU want to read. that’s really the only way to sustain a fanfic blog, otherwise you’ll burn out. if you try to write like someone else, you’ll burn out. it’s gotta be all you because you enjoy it, not for anyone else!

so that’s what I got lol i hope this is mildly helpful!! and thank you im so flattered i inspired you to start posting!!! good luck!!

[ousama]

i’m going to try and argue in good faith here but i’m just not sure why you’re touting utena as a show that’s so entrenched in sexualization of its characters when it goes to avid lengths to skirt around displaying sexual topics in a way that is exploitative. TW for mentions of CP

if you’re uncomfortable with ikuhara’s other works - yuri kuma arashi specifically, then that’s valid and fine. i still think talking about it as “softcore porn” is a reductive way of speaking about it, and doesn’t acknowledge the work and what it was trying to say, but much of my criticisms of that particular show (and other ikuhara works) rest upon the same discomfort and i find a lot of it gratuitous.

but that doesn’t explain how rgu as a work is informed by those same missteps, especially when it precedes YKA. there is deliberate emphasis on anything sexual being an act of violence (that is not gratuitously portrayed) perpetrated through abuse and manipulation. nearly all of the sexual content of this nature is told through metaphor. only a few times is the audience ever exposed to it directly, and this event is never sexualized in any way shape or form.

so i’m not sure where you’re getting this “sexualization of minors” thing from in a show where the entirety of its identity is how young people are coerced into gender roles, often through cyclical sexual violence. when its climax and resolution are its sexually abused girls finding solidarity, comfort and unconditional love in one another. i’m deadass trying to figure in what instance a character is sexualized in this show, and where this happens repeatedly.

if its a matter of ikuhara just being a weirdo to you, then fine, because i do think authorial intent and input matters to an extent (even though he was really just a fraction of RGU’s production). do we scorn sailor moon then, along the same lines, even though you could also view the show and not see explicit sexualization of its minor characters?

how do you argue RGU is a show sexualizing its characters because of its creator, but FMA, an anime that wears its political themes on its sleeve, is somehow uncorrupted by the racism of its author? you like one piece, and that has repeated problems with sexualization and sexual harassment committed by one of its protagonists, that has an author that works closely with and venerates a man that owned so much child porn he was thought to be a distributor at some point?

so what makes RGU so uniquely terrible compared to these other works? i think there are criticisms that can be levied its way, and that goes doubly for the movie, but i think arguing its “sexualizing minors” and is therefore an unimportant piece of art is just bad faith and reeks of you having never actually watched or more importantly understood it. and i hope you can see how incredibly frustrating that is to people who have seen themselves so fully in it to have it reduced to something its not simply because you presumably didn’t bother to engage with it’s actual themes and messages.

im not reading all that why are you people so obsessed with my opinion on an anime poll. get a life. the constant harassing of a real life lesbian over its thoughts on a cartoon lesbian show really is not a hill worth dying on. what does literally any of this have to do with me, a single person mind you, saying i prefer one show over the other

[twochildreninamoteldemo]

im gonna vent in your askbox i hope thats alright, but genuinely deangirls who are also hellers are so. delusional. like even if someone doesnt "ship" wincest like... incest is a theme of the show? like you cannot meaningfully do analysis of the wincest show without talking about wincest. and when hellers try to make every moment about destiel (even when it would be more apt to talk about wincest, like in the siren episode!!) it just. frustrates me so bad. i feel like samgirls + wincesties have a better understanding of the themes of the show (esp s1-5) like. genuinely.

ok to be frank, i wasn't originally gonna post this and just let it sit in my inbox/be deleted and you got your vent and etc. but i'm gonna use it to push back a little in places i'm frustrated with the wank in this fandom. i'm sorry that it's your ask, anon, that prompted this--i have nothing against you, and completely understand your frustration. however.

(btw, in good faith, i'm going to take your usage of "hellers" to be like extreme destiel-only shippers, not chill destiel shippers, as per the original meaning of the term. also note that everything i say here is based on my experience of the FIRST FIVE SEASONS, aka core spn.)

i agree that incest is a big theme of the show--or i should say, incest subtext. there is no actual incest between the show's main family (aka the winchesters) aside from mary's demon deal. is this due to the network? is this due to kripke's creative vision? we'll never know. it can't be ignored within a full analysis of the show, but to say that one can't have meaningful analysis of the show without discussing the incest subtext ignores the conversation that supernatural has with masculinity/gender, american folklore, race, class, etc--whether these conversations are done well or not. i'm not saying you are doing this, but there is a tendency of wincest shippers, as with destiel shippers, to focus solely on sam and dean's relationship, as if there is literally nothing else that matters in the show, which is just blatantly false and prevents people from having a fuller understanding of the show, just as wincest shippers claim to be frustrated about.

and the other thing is that yes, while i do feel that wincesties (using this broadly to also encompass the entire winchester family) have a better understanding of the show than those who don't engage with the incest subtext, i don't actually think that samgirls or deangirls better understand the show over one another. i know i jokingly make posts about this, but it's mainly out of frustration with the dean-centric hellscape that is what the spn fandom is. the true fact of the matter is that it doesn't matter who your favorite character is, it just matters the way in which you understand their motivations and engage with that. i'm sometimes critical of dean because i love him, but i think a lot of the stuff he does gets glossed over by both the fandom and the show, while sam does enough self-bashing on top of the bashing canon already gives him, resulting in a fandom who, when combined with ignoring him in favor of destiel, doesn't choose to engage with the text critically and question why the narrative repeatedly slams sam but praises dean, when they both are complicated people. but i don't think that means you have to necessarily be a samgirl to fully understand the text. especially if you're ignoring dean's plights and positioning of victimhood/survivorship (as sam is too) because he's just not your favorite character. imo it makes someone just as short-sighted.

[kevin-the-bruyne]

cant believe big dragon would be something i need to sit with/sleep on. really the most confusing part for me last ep was their conversation because what were they even saying? it was like everything they said kept flying over each other's head and it was so frustrating because it felt like they had their points and were having roughly the same conversation but also...not? and i have to thank @lelephantsnail for her tags on my post because it really helped streamline my thought about this.

this kind of subtle and nuanced form of miscommunication is not only unprecedented in thai bl but rare in media overall. however, it happens all the time in real life - where you are having a conversation and you understand each other's words perfectly but not each other's meaning/perspective.

b/c the truth is as fuckboi extraordinaires they have different stakes in this issue of Mangkorn's engagement and they're both right to prioritize their own skin in this game - in fact it's the healthy thing to do.

So some of the critical points of miscommunication in this convo (according to me) under the cut

whether or not to share this secret:

this was hard because on one hand mangkorn is trying to set a boundary and he does it in a fairly decent way: there's something im dealing with and i need time to deal with this and ill tell you everything when im ready. But...this is a fairly insane boundary to set with your lover esp when this 'problem' directly affects your relationship. Yai is right to demand to know more because you cannot deal with a problem affecting a relationship one-sidedly. But Mangkorn is also operating here in good faith - he has no intention of betraying Yai, he has all intentions of being with him so why does he have to admit something that will make yai misunderstand and leave him? Mangkorn wants a chance because being duplicitous is not his intention or his goal and its not fair that Mangkorn has to sacrifice his chance at love because of something that was decided for him. But Yai needs a chance too! A chance to decide if he wants to pursue this relationship despite the risks. And this is a good thing! Perhaps putting your life on hold for the dude you've been hate pining over and had one night of hate-love fucking is not the best idea! And thinking about his own heart and impending heartbreak is the right move.

He corners Mangkorn into telling him and Mangkorn tries his best to curtail the pitfalls - you'll understand me, right? im scared you'll leave me so you'll stay by my side right? - and Yai's answer 'its better than knowing nothing' isn't a promise that he will stay with Mangkorn. He's saying that at this point the only chance Mangkorn has of keeping him is by telling the truth. But Mangkorn hears what he needs to hear to tell Yai the truth. And so when Yai's reaction is this:

When Yai's first reaction is to think about himself and not focus on how difficult this situation is for Mangkorn (which it is!) it feels like a huge betrayal!

I had warned him it wasn't going to be easy and he reassured me we will be fine (he hadnt) so why is he saying this to me now? All I'm asking is for him to keep faith so why is he assuming the worst of me?

and Yai isn't assuming the worst of Mangkorn but of the situation itself but you can understand why Mangkorn feels so attacked because he's all raw and vulnerable from sharing something he did not want to share and his partner has reacted in exactly the way he was afraid of the most despite him saying he wouldn't react in that way (yai hasn't said anything of the sort)

And then being classic fuckbois - which honestly relatable - they say the absolute worse thing they could have to each other:

its like they picked the one thing the other was most insecure about and threw it in their faces which honestly was almost comic. they have tried for this long to talk like normal human beings and at the most critical moment of showing support and reaffirming commitment - they both default to their baser instincts of running away from hard things [which fair lmao].

And l love that they are able to call each other out on it! That they don't take the stoic okay that's done then bye! route. Mangkorn expresses what's hurting him - you're my partner and you're supposed to support me - and yai expresses whats hurting him - was giving me a choice in this relationship ever important to you? And of course Mangkorn just gets down to it. Things are spiraling and there's really one way out of this where they can stay together: that despite all the hurtful things they just said to each other - is there a way out of this together Yai knows what Mangkorn needs to hear but Yai answers in a way that is consistent with what he's shown is important to him: honesty and god is it heartbreaking and the way Bank plays it here is so GOOD

So no this conversation achieves nothing and narratively the two characters will engage in the terrible decision making that they would have had they not been so real with each other - Mangkorn will try to run away and Yai tries to distract himself. But boy, if they are to come back to each other in a way that feels realistic and not in a fantastical 'true love conquers all' copout way that can really only ever happen in stories, then having this conversation was absolutely critical.

[decepti-thots]

I was in the tumblr tf fandom for a hot second a few years ago and i just wanted to ask, is it still really aggressive here? because back then there was a lot of shipping drama, there were a few callout posts going around (can't really remember about what) and just...a lot of bad stuff. I personally had someone tell me to kill myself because I liked one of the villains. guess I'm just wondering if, in your opinion, things have chilled out? Cuz I'd like to get back into it but I'm a little hesitant;;;

I'm going to try and give the fullest answer I can in the best faith to this! For context, this blog is a couple years old now, I have enough followers that I get a lot of active engagement on my posts etc, I am very active in TF fandom here, Twitter, and IRL, and while I did not used to be active I have been lurking in TF fandom as long as I have been on Tumblr.

There is absolutely still some toxicity; all fandoms have their bad faith actors, their drama hounds, their shipping Diskhorsers TM. I have gotten hate mail, I know folks who have issue with weird anon haters who are persistent, whatever. But no, it is not as bad as it has been in the past, IMO, not at ALL, and it is 100% possible to have an active, sociable and nice time in this fandom so long as you curate your engagement, with basically no drama at all. Many of the worst folks burned out and left when the fandom got less active and their shitstirring paid lesser and lesser dividends, IME.

People sometimes ask how I maintain such a vocal presence without falling into the still-there drama, and I have some advice that I promise you will mitigate like, 99% of the possible issues you could encounter:

Block whenever you feel like blocking. If you get a bad vibe, if you just don't personally like someone and don't wanna see them, if you see them throwing what looks like a temper tantrum you don't want in on, just block 'em. Remember: blocking is nothing personal towards the person you are blocking. It is not insulting and doesn't need to be 'earned'. Block every single person you think not blocking might even just theoretically cause stress or drama. (I am blocked by several people for reasons no more serious than 'I hate your OTP', and I commend every one of them for doing it and having a better time on this site!)

Delete any and all anon hate. Block anyone and everyone who sends you hate. No exceptions. No witty comebacks. No takedowns. Nothing. You see it and the actual literal second you do, you block and delete. None of it is worth one second of your time. Deprived of the oxygen, they will leave. And you won't be tempted to re-read it and stress out.

In that same vein, if it causes issues, just turn anon off! Turn it off. Personally I keep it on because I simply do not care about the odd troll, but if you care even slightly? Fuck 'em, turn it off, anon is a privilege your followers need to earn by acting in good faith.

Find people you like and follow them, ignore blatant shitstirring in the maintags (again: block people!) and try to curate content and follows and mutuals based on what you do like and not what you don't. Curate positive engagement; do not rely on the general fandom slurry, find what you like and hang out in your own corner of things that bring you joy. If the maintag stresses you out: don't check it. Check the blogs of folks you know are cool instead. Stuff like that.

Fandom should be fun. Fandom should be finding people you like and sharing good times with them, not stressing about avoiding folks you hate, or who hate you. Tumblr lets you moderate how you engage, when, and where more than almost any current social media site; now you can even turn off reblogs and oh my GOD is that a lifesaver function btw. If you want, you can make your blog unsearchable! It means you will need to be more proactive in making friends. But TF fandom is pretty tight knit these days, and folks want to talk a lot of the time. You'll still be able to engage with cool people.

There's way less aggro losers around these days, but more to the point, you can absolutely avoid the ones that still insist on being annoying and starve them out without much effort, tbh.

[saturngalore]

So I did see a very big blogger say that they’re too triggered and exhausted by police brutality and watching our peers die, that they choose to not care and don’t have to. I was blown away by that. Yes, god, I am so tired of the problems we face in our country from being black but to show no empathy for others really saddens me. I truly thought some of my peers here were better than that. Seeing your post though restored my faith and I thank you for saying what I couldn’t put into words. A simple reblog for thousands of eyes to see is so important I don’t see how they don’t get it.

hi anon! sorry it took me awhile to respond bc i really wanted take extra time and thought for this. im glad that my post showed you that everyone not think and feel the same about sharing/supporting for palestine even though we may have the same racial/ethnic background. it’s honestly really disheartening but still frustrating to see other black simmers or just really some black people irl to kinda have that same reaction to what’s going on. i completely understand the suffocating trauma and feeling of hopelessness that comes with being black especially in america. not everyone who is black has the same trauma and i cannot speak for everyone especially those who may had a family member, friend or someone they knew affected by police brutality and/or lynching. the response to police brutality was to protect our peace, to take a break, and to prevent us from breaking down to point of not being able to fight against systemic oppression either alive or not. and that was understandable because stress and constantly being in fear about dying a senseless and brutal death for only being black heavily impacts our health both mentally and physically. im not trying to invalid that pain or experiences at all. and i never will.

but it just doesn’t feel right to me personally to turn away and stay silent about a literal genocide occurring right before us that is endorsed by our current president and is funded by american taxpayer dollars. even though im african american and a list of other marginalized identities, i still have the vital and basic privilege of being able to live with a roof over my head, a warm bed and shower, access to food and water when i need it, access to electricity to listen to music and be on my computer/phone, and so much more than many palestinians don’t have the opportunity to have right now. my mental health is not the best some days but waking up to see what’s going on in palestine every day for the past couple days have yet to drain me (this is probably another privilege) because it’s also the small and big moments of seeing palestine children smiling, journalists i have seen ever since this started still alive and reporting, people protesting all over the world via blockades and physical/financial boycotts. my experience during peak blm may have drained me emotional but the experience also radicalized me and made my activism or just simply my outlook on life more focused on love, community, nourishment, and a hopeful life without colonialism and imperialism. if i was more passive in engaging with geopolitical issues and just shut out the world around then i would be missing out on a lot of good things in this life.

i feel like there could be better ways to say this and maybe im just rambling on but there must be a balance between sustaining yourself as a person amid constant turmoil, violence, pain and death versus becoming complicit and silent just like those who oppress want us to be. every single one of us will not win or be free if silence is the only thing people can do to “protect our peace”. at the end of day, we owe it to the palestinians (as well as the congolese, haitians, sudanese, and many others who only ask that we speak up and care more).