#im the most excited about the chay chapter and it shows in my draft 😂

[snickerdoodlles]

for the wip game: timeloop 👀

ajkfjd so to my great shame, i have like. 3 asks in my inbox for this fic that i forgot to answer and then felt weird about answering, so here's to finally talking about this AU i dearly love in public 😂❤

(i will probably respond to the other asks...eventually, i'm determined to, just. sorry friends, time doesn't exist at snickerdoodlles (dot) tunglr (dot) com)

OKAY SO. timeloop 👀

as usual, my victim is Kim ❤ it happens...very, very vaguely, sometime after ep7 but before any of the Tawan stuff occurs, so Kim's still deep in his snooping era. so when Kim wakes up and realizes he's in a timeloop, his first thought isn't "how the fuck do i get out of this?!" it's "oh fuck yes, no consequences!"

and so begins Kim's consequence free snooping era! who needs awkward flirting when he can just ask Chay any question he wants? who needs caution when trashing Korn's study it won't stick past today? who needs to care what anyone thinks of him when everything but his memories are reset?

except he pushes too many questions on Chay one loop and Chay looks so confused and upset and hurt the guilt lingers and festers far beyond any loop reset. it doesn't matter Chay doesn't remember, Kim mistreated his friend. Kim knows what it's like to hurt Chay, knows he can hurt Chay, knows just how easy it is to do. knows he can't make up for the pain because Chay doesn't remember, because there's nothing to forgive except the hurt only he knows.

it's not just his personal relationships either. Kim pushes too far with Korn and Big takes a bullet for him. and. the thing is. it's one thing to know there are people paid to die for you. it's one thing to know Big specifically will die for him. it's even one thing to accept the people who have died for him, to shrug off those deaths the way he's had no choice but to learn. but it's very different to know someone who has died for you, to watch them bleed out for you, and then face them alive and whole again the next day. to suddenly reconcile just what and how much your choices can strip away from someone else. to have killed someone with your own recklessness and have to face them, fine and oblivious, again and again thereafter.

turns out, timeloops have every consequence and more when you're a constantly guilt-stricken ball of angst, and Kim is going to cry so! much!

[ WIP game ]