#im so siked dude.

[intertexts]

ROSWELL YOU NEEED TO LISTEN TO THE VILLAINS ONESHOT ITS MY FAVORITE ONE IVE LISTENED TO IT LIKE 3 TIMES IT MAKES ME SUCH A SPECIFIC TYPE OF INSANE. DAKOTA COLE (KOTA KILL) GUARD DOG ISMS BUT LIKE TURNED UP TO 12. WILLIAM WIGHT. HEAD IN HANDS. VIRION IS ALSO THERE. I GUESS (SORRY)

YAYAYAYAYYYY IM JUST GONNA START IT NOW...... excitedddddddd :]]]]

[kayvsworld]

im watching im2 and ivan vanko deserves to do whatever he wants actually

[breaddo]

i continue to be fascinated by how people online automatically thought i was a guy even back when i was like 13. how did everyone know i was a dude and it still took me like 4 more years to find out myself what the hell ‼️

[genderfreakxx]

Letting myself become emotionally invested in a school crush like

[diobrando]

i asked the UK group if they wrote anything about the economy and homegirl was like, “this is a government class the economic stuff isn’t relevant”

[quixotical-lymbo]

AAAA HIIII‼️‼️ LOWKEY UR ONE OF THE BLOGS IVE BEEN OBSESSED WITH BUT FARRRRR TOO SCARED TO INTERACT WITH BC IM LIKE THAT, BUT IM TWEAKING OVER D16 RNNNN 😭😭

If its not too much to ask but could i req for some basic D16 hcs or a drabble with a child reader or possibly his child? (IDK HOW AGE AND CHILDREN WORK IN CYBERTRON LMAOO) I really dont mind what you make IM OBSESSED WITH UR WRITINGGG!!

Please take care of urself and eat drink and sleep!! Love the work, keep it up!!!

Pairing: D-16 &  gn!sparkling!Reader Rating: SFW Summary: headcanons of D-16 taking care of his sparkling :3 Warnings/Tags: Canon divergence, pre-canon, cybertronian reader, fluff, family shenanigans, Orion Pax can be viewed as a second father figure/uncle, angst, and typical family dynamics A/N: ahh!! ty! don't be afraid to interact with me :) and writing this was so fun! I had some help from @skelswritingcorner headcanon about sparklings.  Word Count: 1300+ words 

How you two met 

🟡 It was really funny. 

🟡 Ok, no it wasn't. D-16 could've imagined anything else happening during the cycle, anything but something falling on top of his head while he was taking a stroll around Iacon. 

🟡 It was a weird…mini-bot thingy that looked unordinary. If D-16 had to describe you in a few words, it would be tiny, small, and helpless. 

But…the way your optics online as you took in your surroundings and your big, wide optics stared into his own awoke some protective instinct within him. So, he carefully tucked you in his arms and hurried back to the mines. 

Early dynamics 

🟡 D-16 treated you like you were made out of glass, it didn't help that the dust and other particles around the mines made your systems irritated to the point of crying. 

🟡 Oh Primus, the first time you wailed loudly, every bot starred in his direction as the noises shrieking from his chassis area increased. D-16 had to quickly excuse himself to the showers and hide in there with you to shush you. 

🟡 Overtime, D-16 learned how to tend to your needs and taking care of you became easier with each passing deca-cycle. 

Current Dynamics 

🟡 Who knew a little bot like you who ate little, chirp, scream a bit,  slept a lot, and couldn't walk would be easy to take care of. 

🟡 Oh man, once you've grown enough to stand on your own two pedes, things get harder for D-16 as he now has to keep a closer optic on you at all times. 

🟡 You had a knack for getting into places you shouldn't be in and D-16's spark nearly stopped when he caught you trying to sneak inside of a mining shaft. You were scolded, of course, but that didn't stop you from trying again.

🟡 As tiring as it is to watch over you, D-16 felt it was worth it if it meant seeing your bright smile each time. 

Uncle Pax 

🟡 Ok, so. Remember the incident when D-16 first brought you in? Well, Orion wasn't too far on D-16's tailpipe. When he saw what his best friend brought into the showers, he was…excited?

🟡 "Why are you smiling so-" 

🟡 "Do you realize what you have in your servos right now?! That's a sparkling!" 

🟡 "????"

🟡 "Dude, I read about them and they-" 

🟡 Orion goes into detail about the records he's skimmed about tiny cybertronians who were referred to as sparklings. 

🟡 The old records hypothesize that they were an alternative way to produce bots in large quantities, there were downsides to this method since the bots that came out were…not up to par with being on their own unless someone cared for them. 

🟡 There's a theory that the method was abandoned due to how much time it takes for these sparklings to grow and be a part of society. No one has seen a sparkling since, and those that already grew up from being sparklings are a scarce number. 

🟡 To say Orion was siked that D-16 practically held a living relic in his servos was an understatement, he even proposed to take over caring for the sparkling as their 'sire.' A term, D-16 later learned was the role given to bots who created a close, familial bond with these sparklings. 

🟡 D-16, for some reason, decided to decline Orion's offer but allowed him to help whenever he could 

🟡 And help Orion did. Much to D-16's displeasure of his friend encouraging his sparkling to get into trouble.

🟡 Heading off into the archives together became a pastime for you two. 

🟡 Even if your sire got mad when your uncle almost got caught by the high guards, it was fun clinging to his back as he jumped through hoops to get away from them.

🟡 Keeping you hidden from others was important, but your uncle adding a bit of fun in your life made it bearable when you were kept away from the light of day. 

Affection? 

🟡 D-16 and you will sometimes butt helms as a form of affection, especially after a petty spat.

🟡 Hugs are on the table and D-16 loves embarrassing you with a bear hug, might even make kissy faces until you squeal and pull yourself out of his arms

🟡 All and all, D-16 has physical touch as a love language (helm pats, arm rubs, scooping you up and throwing you in the air, etc). 

Arguments? 

🟡 Speaking of keeping you hidden, you couldn't understand why your sire didn't want others to see you

🟡 You did nothing wrong, but your sire was having none of it.

🟡 "Do you want to be taken away from me and Pax?" 

🟡 Same old excuse did nothing to stop you from sneaking out at night and exploring the streets of Iacon

🟡 Trying to sneak back in was the harder part, because D-16 would already notice your absence and panic. You always have an earful waiting for you when you get back home.

 

🟡🟡🟡 Drabble 1: Bundle of Joy 🟡🟡🟡

"Alright! Time to switch with the night crew, make way everybody!" The command from the captain of the mining crew felt like a blessing. Orion wiped the coolant from his forehelm and glanced around the area, making sure that no one was watching–he made his way towards the exit while every bot spoke among each other. 

Up ahead, a familiar jaundice-eyed mech approaching with something behind his back. 

As the two near each other, a single nod was exchanged before the bundle in D-16's servo was passed off to Orion.

Orion continued walking out of the mines until he reached a safe distance to unwrap the bundle and cooed as your bright (o/c)'s came into view. He wiggled a digit in your face and couldn't stop the smile growing on his dermas as you grasped his digit and giggled. 

"Come on, we have a berth time story with our designations on it."

Orion carefully tucked you in his arm and walked toward the shared quarters. 

  

🟡🟡🟡Drabble 2: Goodbye, for now. 🟡🟡🟡

"Oh? What's this…or rather, who?" 

You shrieked as you were plucked from behind your sire's knelt form. 

"No-! Let them go!" D-16 was quick to lunge for Sentinel and was knocked back by the guards and their weapons. 

"Ah ha! So this was the little relic I've been hearing so much about?" Sentinel held you up by the back of your neck cables and rotated you like some sort of spectacle."I remember when you guys existed, a shame I'll have no use for you, but my wall is missing a new mount…" 

"You monster!" B-127 shouted as he attempted to stand but was also shoved to the ground by a weapon. 

Sentinel was about to say some witty remark when a large shadow pounced on him. Chaos erupted as D-16 tackled the false Prime and began raining his fists on Sentinel. The guards all came to Sentinel's aid, which gave Bee enough time to break free, slice down a guard that tried taking you and scooped you up from the ground. 

"Hey little dude, everything's ok, ok-?" Bee bounced you in his arms as the tears on your face continued forming at the edge of your optics. Where was your sire? 

A loud crash caught your and Bee's attention as the two whipped helms as a large hole appeared in the wall of Sentinel's office. Your sire and Sentinel were nowhere to be found. 

"Ok…let's go help Dee!" Bee glanced around the damaged space before running out.

Everything happened way too fast for your little processor to make anything make sense. In one second, your sire's friend—and practically your secondary sire—was falling in a hole, then your sire…did something bad but B-127 covered your optics before you could see what happened, and then you were carried toward the dome's roof staring at the unfamiliar mech before you.

"Go…Take the high guard and leave, you are banished from Iacon." Optimus Prime paused, his optics flickering toward the trio slowly approaching. Elita-1, B-127, and…you. 

"It didn't have to end this way," Optimus returned his gaze to his former friend. 

"...this isn't over, Prime." Megatron seethed. 

The two momentarily paused as your small voice called out to your sire. Megatron's optics dimmed as he lowered his helm, a tense silence followed before Megatron finally raised his helm and spoke, "Keep the liability with you, I don't have room for any weaknesses. Not anymore." 

"..." Optimus Prime refused to speak, fearing that his voice would've matched the growing pain in his spark. 

Megatron huffed before limping away and commanding the high guard to follow him. 

B-127 grunted as you wiggled and trashed in his hold, trying to get to your sire and-

Your teary gaze watched in shock as your sire, your only family, your world up and left you behind. Your fans kicked in as you lost the ability to breathe, your vision grew blurry as the wails in your intake were stomped by the lump causing a croaked sob to leave you. 

You buried your faceplate in the B-127's chassis. 

B-127 and Elita-1 shared a glance, one twisted with pain for the crying sparkling and the other hesitation. B-127 turned to look at the new Prime and found he had already made his way over and reached for you. 

B-127 handed you off to the larger mech and Optimus rubbed your back, shushing and whispering comforting words in your audial. 

"We…have a lot of work to do, for now, we all deserve a rest." Optimus murmured to the other two. Elita-1 already understood Optimus's hidden intention and took charge as she directed her attention to the awaiting crowd of bots. 

B-127 glanced between Elita-1 and Optimus before joining Elita. Optimus turned his attention to you.

"Do not worry, little one, I'm here." Optimus reassured. "I will not leave you, not now, not ever." 

"...promise?" 

Optimus smiled for the first time since he came back from being offline. 

"I promise." 

😼 - I do not give permission for anyone to translate, copy, republish, or plagiarize any of my written works. I provide no permission for any of my literary works to be used in artificial intelligence. like my writing? consider buying me a kofi :)

banner(s) by @kodaswrld !!

[fipindustries]

you should know that mrcatfishing is an ai dude and the post you reblogged from them is ai generated

nooooooooooooo, really????? are you for real right now my dude?????? oh no, holy shit, oh my god, i had no idea, oh my god, oh damn, holy fuck, please say sike, please tell me this isnt true, it cant be, its not possible, not mr catfishing of all people!!!! this is the worst, my world is crumbling to pieces, this must be a mistake, there has to be some kind of error, mr catfishing? really??? i dont think i can handle this right now, who else can i trust if not my dear mr catfishing!!!

thanks for the heads up dude, ill make sure not to reblog any more perfidious, nasty, sneaky A. I. art from this swindler and conman, mr catfshing, in fact im calling the fbi, the cia and the cybercops right now so they know they kind of untrustworthy cad we have in our midst, you have done good today, brave citizen.

[dreamyblossommwrites]

Hi! I was wondering I can request denki kaminari dating a magical girl!reader who’s in the same class as him and like the dynamic is just readers the knight in shining armor and Denkis the princess 😭(also if it’s ok can it be dating hc’s?🫶🫶🫶)

Yeah ofc!!! Im not sure if I understand ur request correctly so feel free to send another one (when requests are open) if u wanted something else!!! :3

ꕥ Okay so, when I first read this request I thought about the "My girl can wear whathever she wants beacuse SHE can fight" 😭😭

ꕥ Especially if you are the 'brave knight' leading your relationship.

ꕥ Also the dynamic of reader being the knight is so interesting like??? He would love this sm omfg.

ꕥ I dont know if you understand the knight x princess thing the same way I do but I see it like: Denki having this fat FAT crush on you but not doing anything about it beacuse well, hes just some dude with electricity quirk, then theres you liking him too, noticing all those small details about him, noticing HIM, and just simply walking up to him, watching that pink blush appear on his face while youre trying to chat <33

ꕥ Im 98% sure he would NOT start hitting on you cuz how can someone so good be interested in him??? Well surprise <333

ꕥ But after you start dating...

ꕥ Sike nothing has changed, hes still all blushy and stuff 😭😭

ꕥ Hes just so WHIPED for you omg. I know I said it before but he would just talk about his partner all the time, no matter what the conversation was about, he always manages to weave in some compliment about you into the convo <33

ꕥ Hes just talking and talking and talking and talking about you 😭 Youre so good to him, he loves you so much, youre the smartest person alive, the best future hero, youre not scared of anything!

ꕥ Doesnt matter if youre actually are all those things, to him youre the best person alive and thats FINAL.

ꕥ And if someone says ANYTHING bad about you... may lord help them beacuse they will need to listen to the whole list of why his right about you and trust me its LONG.

ꕥ Also you're probably smarter than him (its not hard tbh 😭 our dumb baby) and he just loves when you explain school stuff to him

ꕥ Like, he gets to hang out with you AND learn for the exam? Hell yeah!

ꕥ not lets talk about the hero stuff!!! From what I understand from the request, youre quirk has to do something with magic??? Idk Im kinda dumb so lets stick to it 😇

ꕥ It doesnt matter if youre some kind of witch, telekinesis user or literally any other form of magic. HES. SO. PROUD. of you 😭

ꕥ Complements your hero outfit everytime he sees you in it, silently praying to himself that today's classes would be held in pairs so he cam admire you a bit more

ꕥ I dont want to make him look too dumb but... He loves when you tell him what to do in training.

ꕥ Imagine him catching a villain on his first patrol with you, tying them up while talking about how glad he is that your plan worked, how happy he is you guys work so good together

ꕥ then after a long day of work hes taking you to his dorm, sits you on his bed, turns on some movie and then lets you put some face masks on him while gossiping (his fav part of the day tbh 😭)

ꕥ You are the only person who can use him as a charger without any complaints BUT ONLY when youre doing the face masks (lie, you can use him whenever you like, he will only to pretend he doesnt like it)

Im sorry its so bad and short and stuff but the first version of this just didnt save in my draft for some reason and by the time I started writing this again I was FLOODED with schoolwork <\333 ALSO SORRY FOR THE LONG WAIT BUT AGAIN, SCHOOL <\3333 I didnt read it again after writing so sorry for any errors 😛😛😛😛

[pixlpxie]

lol i saw that anon ask and I wanted to make a ranking of this. Let me know what you think 🤭

Jongho: that dude is a walking dom, even more than Yunho. Dom on the streets and dom in the sheets. Probably the classical one, all vanilla and missionary

Yunho: even though he’s FREAKYYY FREAKYY, like all scorpio mars are hella freaky, that placement alone is enough 💀 I think he wouldn’t want to submit to his partner even if you pay him. He would probably like having them on top of him but that’s it and make you think you could have the power but no, sike hihi. Hard dom or service dom. I swear he hides so many things somewhere I don’t buy his golden retriever persona, those are the freakiest bitches in heat. But maybe due to his beliefs, he also could be a just a missionary type of guy 🫠

Hwa: switch leaning dom. Dude is an aries but with cancer moon so he could want to dominate but also being dominated by someone with Mommy/Daddy vibes. I also think Aries men like those vibes as well lol, they’re strange creatures for moi

Joong: switch leaning dom, can see him being a power bottom too like those meanie ones that tell you what to do and step on you ufff, such a dream. Yeah he really likes his leader role, especially knowing he’s in charge of people way bigger than him😫 and that smirk he has? The power he holds. Truly an icon for us shorter doms even tho he’s tall af

San: such a good service dom 😭 the best one you’ll ever have. Would love to do everything you ask him, he really loves to pleasure his partner. I feel he’s very shy so he would feel flustered to being on the receiving side, but would enter in sub space once you treat him like the prince he is. Still, I think when he doms he can get a lil… mean like ‘’oh, you want this? You have to beg really good for me. If not then you won’t cum sowwie 🥺’’

Yeosang: 🥺 I have such mixed feeling with this baby, he’s such an enigma, but probably switch leaning sub, but not like completely submit to the point he would let you really dom him but would like to have you on top of him and telling him how to fuck you. Oh Sangie 😫 he could like the classics like Jongho

Woo: oh yeah this motherfucker is a 50/50. I know my people. Loves to dom while letting you dom him. 69 with him would be heaven, But would probably lean towards being a mean dom/power bottom. Juicy

Mingi: so tall, so thick, so intimidating, such a deep voice and yet so submissive. The perfect pillow prince. The only one I can see being into things like pegging. Like humans are 70% water, Mingi is 90% sub and 10% dom, a service dom mostly. He loves and craves to be praised so when he doms is mostly to feed his ego, but It’ll lead to him entering to sub space very fast. This man needs a power bottom in his life. Also slut, whore or other degrading names are a huge no for him unless you’re calling him a good slut or the best and most precious whore you’ll ever had, but baby or prince and another cute names are better for him. Likes edging and teasing like no other, I feel like the concerts are kind of telling 😬 sub or switch leaning sub

hihi 🤭

I agree with 99% of what you said i think the only things that i don't quite agree with is that jongho being more dominant than yunho and mingi being almost entirely a sub i think instead of 90% id give him a 70% sub ngl he would love to know that hes in charge as well so yeah service dom fits him too😋 also i think yeosang isnt exactly a sub?? Hes a switch yes but imo hes a dom leaning one he looks all cute and soft but you know what they say abt the cute looking ones🙂‍↕️ AND BESTIE ABT YUNHO LIKE I AINT BUYING HIS GOLDEN RETRIEVER IMAGE AT ALL EITHER LIKEEE HES SO FUCKING SECRETIVE he might be enjoying it for sure but i actually don't think he likes the constant puppy treatment and im so fucking sure he will drop this image at one point. Idk how idk when but it will happen.

[real-fire-emblem-takes]

i want fates/awakening child units but with geneology's generational mechanics in a new fire emblem. dude i goddamn loved minmaxing who marries who for optimal units but also throwing in pairings i liked or who made the funniest units. i always did donnel/panne because i loooooove taguel units and i NEEDED yarne to be as cracked as goddamn possible or i would DIE. i also always do robin/chrom because like. uh thats canon. and also bc morgan and lucina are siblings in my mind forever. otherwise i minmax generally. other than i never get nowi unless im not allowing myself to get yolked yarne. looks at you. you know why

what was i saying. YES right child units i WANT THEMMM. i want a slightly limited class selection for everyone so kids matter more!!! i want units youve actually trained to pass on their training to their kidssss. i want the next generation to look back at their parents failures (war crimes) and vow to do better. i want bisexuality. i want a proxy war for the first gen and the final war for the second or something like that. i want the cause of the first war to be undiscovered because the first generation basked in their glory and forgot to look deeper at why!!! i want people who grew up in peace they were promised would be eternal but fucking sike its not dude. i also maybe want options where you can decide a little how your units raised their kids maybe? like you can select where a couple raised their kid or something to give the kid an extra class or a bonus to a stat growth or someshit. who knows.

i want generational drama and i want sex to be canon again

.

[coachs-kit-bag]

Submission from @broooooo:

Hey coach, I'm thinking about joining a gym for the first time, and im quite nervous, being around all those muscled men, and such, and even though my sexual drive is much gone, I feel like the locker room.. the smells and the everything might push me over the edge, would I start saying bro and dude? Those backwards caps ? I have no idea I'm just siked to get jacked Think you could calm my nerves? Show me the way

—-

Joining a gym brings a new set of challenges and opportunities, it’s true. Once you find yourself in that locker room, you might feel initially intimated but, in my experience, you’ll discover a sense of community with your fellow jocks soon enough. 

Some advice that I always give new starters is to make sure they look the part - as a fan of this blog, you’ll probably know what I mean already. From skintight lycra or spandex to ensure that you’re staying in a well-fitting jockstrap, the right uniform is half of the work. If you find yourself letting out a ‘bro’ or ‘dude’ along the way, so be it - as long as you are part of the team, right, champ?

Starting before the 1st of the new year is a great way to beat the crowds, too. Hopefully, this pep-talk with your old coach is enough to get you started on this new journey of yours. 

Get out there and make Coach, proud!

[lesharl-eclair]

day 19: 1 fic a day!

show kudos comments love & make someone’s day :)

teeth by @ocontraire (M, 38.9k, 3/3)

The Bond movies lied. This life consisted mostly of transactions more than actions, information in exchange for anything. Once, a little drunk and a little tired, Lando told him about it, the way he got information when other options failed. A little flirting, a little drink, a little bit of that tucked-chin vulnerability, and he found himself with more knowledge than expected. He explained no further. Oscar didn’t want him too.

landoscar (made me cry)

i swear im on some sort of longfic binge this was so so so ooc for me. but. dude i dont regret a single second spent reading this .

this fic is so so so bigbrained tightly woven cinematic almost. writing style is chefs kiss mclaren Spy Agency details are so good. the intrigue of it all. the way all the pieces fall into place (but sike they dont). the rawness of it. the inescapability of duty maybe? or at least of something bigger than themselves. the amount of flavour here im feasting ?..??????...?? the mutual yearning after things they both cant have . cant quote lines here bcs i would run out of space but everything is so mindblowingly lovingly crafted????? like u measureed every sentence for maximum impact. god.

okok ok i need to stop talking but. the fernando here and his list. really got to me. the mythologisation of people, also. the carlando + jealousy hints. aaaaaaaaahhhhhhh sO MUCH details i could scream cry etc etc etc this needs at least 15 more rereads to appreciate properly. downloaded and bookmarked.

*

thanks for coming to my ted talk guys ... as always, see you tomorrow & happy reading!

[lobster-lover]

hello god dude ok im sorry for pouring a whole bunch of complaints into your inbox but: im tired of trying to pretend like i care about literally anyone elSE the entirety of f&c i was like haha ok. but when are we gonna talk about betty though. when are we gonna get some indepth betty thoughts from her perspective. maybe at the end she'll have a whole episode dedicated to explaining how she felt all this time huh? n they were like SIKE we are putting your wife on a bus. cope

like like like if i had my way: 8 episode character analysis miniseries just about betty. 'oh her character is focused solely on and is all about simon blah blah there wouldnt be enough to talk about' dude she needs like VOLUMES written about her im not kidding shes so complicated and fascinating and magical, they so totally didnt have to build her up just to not take it anywhere! if i had it my way shed be on some kind of adventure interspersed with flashbacks where she considers her history and we get to see her thoughts and feelings, kind of like stakes or f&c or obsidian, but all about her. i dont know where im going with this i just think she could carry entire episodes by herself

YEAH LIKE. not sure if i got my own hopes wayyyy up before the show came out but i expected the betty stuff to be like . GOOD??? GFJHRJEHAKERHHA honestly all of fnc felt like waiting for them to do Something with betty TO ME PERSONALLY. i kept going "huh. was that it" after every betty segment like come onnn shes such a huge part of this and all we see is simons perspective??. i was completely ambivalent towards simon before but fnc made me hate him so much just because everything revolved so much around him WHICH IS FINE!! i know its kind if the point. but id like it more if it didnt come at the expense of throwing bettys whole thing aside like that.. we have so much empty space time wise from when she arrived in ooo to CAWM so its not like theres not material there ?? am i crazy tell me if im crazy

[hermanunworthy]

!DNDADS S2 EP47 SPOILERS!

welp. todays the day. pray for me guys this could easily be the most upsetting episode of dndads for me. im dreading this so bad

- IS THAT FUCKING HERMIE SINGING???

- I CANT DO THIS

- I WAS NOT EXPECTING THE INTRO TO BE SAD IM SICK IM SICK IM ALREADY GONNA CRY

- "HATING MY FATHER INSTEAD OF HOLDING YOUR HAND" HEY???? HEY???! IM GONNA KMS

- OAKWORTHY IS CANON. IN THE WORST WAY POSSIBLE.

- FROM WHAT I HEARD I THOUGHT SCAM WAS IN THE INTRO???? BUT THIS. THIS HURTS SO BAD

- i feel sick i havent been able to move on from the intro

- im gonna be so honest i was expecting a "sike" or something at the end so u can imagine my relief when the little clicks started playing

- okay. okay. time to listen to ur fun facts u sick fucks

- WILL ACCIDENTALLY CALLING THE PODCAST DUNGEONS AND DRAGONS AGAIN LMAOOO

- anthony stfu i dont want to hear ur voice (hes literally the dm)

- MASTER OF MANIPULATION LINCOLN LI WILSON

- will. what evil fact do u have for us today.

- NORMAL DOES TAROT READINGS WHAT

- WILL IS GONNA JUST DRAW A CARD RN???

- LOVERS??? THERES NO FUCKING WAY

- WILL ACKNOWLEDGING HERMIE DIED IM GONNA THROW UP

- A BROKEN MARRIAGE???? HOLY SHITTTT

- scary plays the piano omg!!!

- THATS THE DUMBEST REASON EVER

- "im really nervous about what anthonys gonna do this episode" U AND ME BOTH MATT

- MY HEART IS POUNDING. MY HANDS ARE SWEATING. MOMS SPAGHETTI /ref

- it has taken me an hour just to get through the intro + facts.

- "but at what cost?" AT WHAT COST IS RIGHT BETH.

- SO NORMAL WASNT CONSCIOUS FOR IT. UR FUCKING JOKING

- MATT SUGGESTING THEY HIDE THE TRUTH FROM NORMAL. I CAN FEEL TEARS COMING

- ATOPPP ANTHONY HELPP

- BETHS REAGAN JOKE TO THE RESCUE

- NORMAL IS AWAKE AGAIN. OH GOD. OH GOD. OH GOD

- NOOOO OFC THEYRE GETTING INTERRUPTED

- "wheres hermie?" IM DONE

- NORMAL CANT SEE HERMIES BODY OH MY LORDDD

- anthony rushing them away. i cannot. i cannot

- "well fix it" im done

- NORMAL GOES TO PICK THEM UP.

- I CANT DO THIS.

- "this marriage has one less spouse but heavens got one more little angel" MATTHEW ARNOLD CAN U NOT.

- im sitting here in shock through all of this

- "just be happy ur not in hell" shut up anthony too soon

- thank god normal didnt take damage again

- lincoln cool scar era okay

- NORMAL PANICKING LOOKING FOR SPELL COMPONENTS LIKE HE DID W TERRY JR I CANTTTT

- HENRY OAK GARCIA. SAVE ME HENRY

- LARK AND SPARROW GIVING EACH OTHER A LOOK HELP ME. HELP ME

- NORMAL DOING SENSE MOTIVE AGAIN STOP IT

- AND GETTING A 1 AGAIN!!!!!

- theyre back home.

- "VOTE WILLY"?????

- "u guys ready to see him?" NO. NO IM NOT

- ty for protecting dood scary :[

- NORMAL IS HOLDING HERMIES HAND AND TALKING TO THEM. WILL CAMPOS DONT DO THIS TO MEEEEE

- ANTHONY STOP RUBBING IN HOW DEAD THEY ARE

- "the only thing keeping u together is the absolute ignorance u have of the fact that maybe the only person who ever showed u any real affection in the last couple years of ur life is dead" anthony burch im hunting u down.

- STOPPPPP NOT THE AD

- THE OLD EARTH WHOOOA

- is the dude w the white beard that "new fan fave npc" will was talking about lol

- HENRY REVEAL. HENRY REVEAL!!!!

- BARRY?????

- I SCREAMED I ACTUALLY SCREAMED

- I DIDNT KNOW IF WE WERE GONNA GET BARRY BACK. NO WAY

- MERCEDES IS DEAD..... STOP IM CRYING AGAIN

- THEM ALL CALLING HERMIE THEIR FRIEND. OOUGH

- UR FUCKING KIDDING. ANTHONY DO NOT TEASE US LIKE THIS

- "MADE OF GOOF MATTER" UR JOKING

- NORMALS SNAPPING OHHHH GOD

- NORMAL. NORMAL ISTG.

- NORMALS TRYINF TO BRING THEM TO SCAM?????

- HOLY FUCK......

- THEYRE IN THE SIMPSONS NOW.

- SCAM LIKELY. MY FUCKING ENEMY.

- WHY DOES HE. WHY DOES HE ACTUALLY CARE. I WAS NOT EXPECTING THIS THERES NO WAY

- "HES MY BEST FRIEND IN THE WHOLE WORLD" SHOOT ME.

- THEY DONT HAVE A SOUL.

- WTF IS SCAM GONNA DO

- ANTHONY I DONT TRUST U ONE BIT

- anthony burch. i hate u

- okay scam apologizing does feel good

- "I DONT WANT ANOTHER ONE I WANT THIS ONE" AND PUNCHES HIM. OH. MY GOD.

- "u feel like home for some reason" WAILS

- OH MY GOD SCARYS GONNA TELL NORMAL.

- GUYS I CANT DO THIS I REALLY CANT

- THE TREE. WILL CAMPOS PLZ

- HENRY TOLD NORMAL HES PROUD OF HIM. NOBODY TALK TO ME AGAIN EVER

- ty henry for giving normal what he needed im gonna sob my eyes out

- THEYRE GONNA PUT THE SUN BACK.

- THE FUCKING. THE FUCKING SUNRISE

- MATT OLD LADY NPC

- WHAT IS THIS FUCKING IMPROV

- CHAPARRAL.

- DONT FUCKIJF HIT ME UP

- "i liked u too" sighs.

- "GOODNIGHT SWEET PRINCE" END ME.

- "hermie u definitely were one of us" SOBS

- "i did notice u. thanks for everything" AAUAGAUHH

- LINK SAID NOTHING FOR HERMIE GOOD GOD

- "lark shakes ur hand, sparrow goes in for a hug" ough.

- OH MY GOD HENRYS GONNA SEE CODE PURPLE.

- HOLY SHIT YALL THIS IS BIG

- THEYRE TEACHING HERO AND NORMAL HOW TO SHOOT.

- BABY NORMALLLL

- "help me normal, only u can save me normal" WTF??? WTF????

- WHAT THE FUCK.

- guys i made it through. [confetti falls on me]

[definitelynotshouting]

This is the first time I’m hearing that “X walked so that Y could run” meant one was worse. I thought it meant one was first and set the pavement for the other to go/happen. So you’re definitely not alone in that.

Dude its straight up haunting me im sitting here like "please say sike. please say sike RN that CANNOT be what it means." going to be sitting up thinking abt this for the next two business weeks straight /hj

[supa-suckers]

Shakes x Skarra

Ship Headcanons:

Okay look we all know very damn well that thesse two are gonna need some help on the relationship im talking like profesional help.

There is some point in Couple's Counselling where their theraphist snaps and just goes 'Look Skarra i can either help you get over Shakes or get with him, not both!' Or 'You either stop pretending you don't care about this or start caring!'

İt gets easier after that.

Verg big on PDA once they go public (which -let's face it- won't take long) arm across shoulders, hand in the other's back pocket, kiss on the cheek, hip bumps, hand holding, etc. etc.

Extending on that both teams have stopped letting their respective players sit on the front row whenever they come to eachother's matches since Skarra and Sahakes' new favourite goal celebration is tugging the other down and smooching.

Vince visibly gagged the first time they did it, Coach called Shakes' mom.

The dogs warm up to Shakes surprisingly quickly Skarra suspects he let them have chesse or something.

Whenever they argue both dogs take Shakes' side just to piss him off.

After their first Big argument Shakes left the house to try and give both of them some space but they both have major seperation anxiety do he came back 20 mins. later to a...quite distraught Skarra.

They made it a rule that no matter how mad they are instead of leaving they'll stick by eachother and when it's time to actually talk it through they'll be cıvıl about it.

Dee's reaction to them dating was looking Skarra dead in the eyes and saying 'you don't deserve him' that dosen't mean she likes him though, she tolarates him at best.

Spenza looked Skarra dead in the eyes and said 'i'm onto you buddy', he never stopped looking for proof of some evil plan and who can blame him really.

Shakes is just as childish and Skarra's just as insuffrable.

Slowly both pairs get more used to eachother but they don't show it.

Spenza is real good with kids though and Dee appriciates a good mystery story. Begrudging Spenza Dee friendship anyone?

They like to bring eachother flowers because that's what normal couples do, right?

Both praise themselves on being the only one (?) able to understand the other, they also love showing off their partner

Skarra is a legs guy, he also appriciates a nice pair of lips, Shakes is more into the shoulders he can lean on and the ass he can slap.

The teams FREAKED when they found out Supa Strikas were all like 'Ha-Ha nice one Shakes/say sike rn/ c'mon dude tell me ur smarter than that!' Klaus thought it was the ultuimate enemies to lovers story.

İ.U was more of a 'HAH you owe me thirty bucks assmunch/Saw that one coming/well this ought to be interesting'.

Nicknames are:. Bro + every insult ever with like a honey thrown in during a tender moment.

NSFW:

Okay so y'all are gonna come at me for this but thesse guys bone like conservative 70 year olds, despite both having play boy type personalitys they never quite got it up.

Both are all talk and a wobbly walk basically.

They think having the lights off is kinky, Skarra has a thing for hair pulling he tried once and they had to stop just so he could pull his fingers out of that bird nest. Shakes is madly into hickies both giving and receiving.

First time happened after the first argument prolly not a good mindset to roll in the hay with but i think we should accept the fact that they'll never have a perfectly non-toxic relationship.

Biggest turn offs are: oral since they like to run their mouths and bondage because *vauge gesture*.

Skarra has red LED lights in his bedroom Shakes refuses to woo-hoo while they're on.