#im so ready for this to be done lol im just a bit burnt out on it atm

[averycutesalamander]

this accursed fucking boothill fic is sooo close to being done so here's my favorite excerpt so far

[ofmdee]

foof. typing this out on tumblr because it feels easier to collect my thoughts here rather than twitter, lmfao, but MAN my creative well is bone dry rn, i feel like i have zero energy and motivation to work on projects and i just. it's driving me crazy lmfao, and in the back of my mind i know i'm burnt out and need a break, but it's so hard to take a break, because like, i don't have much else going on in my life rn, or ever, like fandom has always been a huge, important part of my life and i don't rly know what to do or who i am if im not obsessed over SOMETHING lmfao. my gf said last night something like, i guess it's hard to take a break when it's related to a hyperfixation/special interest and like!! yeah!! it's rly hard to untangle all of that!

but. idk. i don't feel happy rn with a lot of things irl and online, and i know i need to rest and do nothing and let the well fill up again but that also scares me? so i am just going to try to ease up on myself a little bit, try to go more than a day without feeling compelled to post something new just because i'm afraid ppl will leave or forget me or something if i don't constantly pump out Content. and i know i did this to myself, lmfao, i rly don't know how to do things in moderation and this is a constant cycle of going too hard and then abruptly losing all interest

my gf sent me this last night and even the first paragraph got me!!! like, that's ME!!!

i am in the reluctant admission stage rn lmfao.

i am not going to say i am completely going to stop creating during this time, because that would be a lie, but i am rly going to try and chill tf out, stop worrying about getting fics done in time for mermay, and just kinda try to recharge. and i don't wanna say this is a firm break or whatever because when i inevitably fail at taking a break, i will end up beating up on myself, so im just gonna say i am gonna try to be like...... idk, creative Lite or something for a little bit.

im still gonna be around every day lmfao, but probably for less time than usual. i'm still gonna reblog/retweet things, and i'll probably have some original stuff as well, but i am not gonna keep holding myself to the impossible standard of having something new every day. and i know no one else expects that of me!!! but i have somehow put that expectation on myself. i can use this time to share some old favorites again instead!!

i just started a new game+ in coral island, so ive got that going for me, lmfao, and it's getting nicer outside finally and i rly truly need to touch grass more often!! idk why i always feel like i need a huge explanation for what i do, and it probably wont even be super noticeable to most ppl lol, but!! idk. sometimes i just need to work things out this way.

so, i am releasing myself of the burden of having some fics done for mermay, and posting daily, and feeling like i have to make tangible progress on creative projects on the regular. or, that is my goal, at any rate. i think i'll just focus on gifs/still shots for mermay, my fics will be ready when they are ready 😤 but even if i don't do that much, it's okay!!! mermaids are good any time of the year imho.

i just need to get to a point where i actually Enjoy the process of creating again, because it feels like a chore rn and i hate that :((((

idk, anyway if u read all this thank u, thank u for following me and liking what i do, here is an old gif for ur troubles

[cheste7]

Day 2 (18/11/23)🌟

a pic of my bias in seventeen because why not

hi again! even if it's inly 5 pm in my country i'd call it a day. tonight I didn't sleep well (no way🫠) because of a mosquito and also because i had to wait for my roommate to return home. so this morning i woke up very tired and upset for some rent issues. we took the subway all the way down to the nearest bill office (idk if it is a word in english) to complain about this. 💸 then my roommate left for his hometown and now i'll spend the weekend alone. i was quite happy to relax and take a short time of rest in solitude but then i started feeling mentally and physically drained about this and that and i ended up with nothing done. I JUST WANT TO SLEEP 🛏

however, i decided not to study anything uni-related today bc it would be unproductive, i think i will revise something after dinner but nothing more

Language things:

JAPANESE: i completed one lesson about some basic counter suffixes but I want to practice more because there are so many!! i am finally pretty confident with my N5 kanji knowledge and when I hear a new word in the minna no nihongo lessons on yt i always try to write it in kanji characters. learning kanji makes my chinese mandarin studies way easier even if japanese grammar is more similar to korean language. however in today's lesson i found a word which i remember from the sushi restaurant the other day いらっしゃいませ which means welcome! 🥢 i've also learned how to say things such as i have been studying japanese for two months ( 私は２ヶ月日本語を勉強しま。)🇯🇵

KOREAN: i continued to study some grammar points from the seventeen's blog in Budapest, this time i've learned A-(으)ㄴ 것 같다 and V- 는 것 같다 to express a guess and i watched a video by ggomi's school on yt, she's really good and her explanations are very clear even though they're in korean. recently i've started to write in a journal some simple sentences about my daily life, my feelings and everything that comes in mind and i think my korean writing skills are slowly improving. also, i like to test my speaking skills with papago translator to see if my pronounciation is correct (at the moment i'm not ready yet to talk with native speakers on hellotalk etc) 🇰🇷

i did not study chinese today because I have to retain the things i've learned and also because I think I have to work on my pronounciation so im planning to watch some content I like such as a cdrama or stuff🇨🇳

i'm a bit hungry now but today I ate pasta with pesto and i burnt my tongue while tasting the pasta to see if it was ready so i don't know if i'll be able to eat something lol

also i don't know if im going out with my friend tonight im too tired for this (im talking like an old lady👵)

[prynnehesters]

evil durge updated bcuz i keep forgetting to do this lol

sometimes i think im burnt out of this game but like, w/e. im gonna play this and then get my fuck astarion and do everything run out of the way and then be done

but i might take a break after i finish this run and play a few smaller games

and then lies of p

anyways....i got my slayer form and it's super fun. i felt bad about being evil, but it is fun bcuz i convinced 3 of my companions to take brain worms (i've given up on lae'zel and astarion was like "no, i want to be sexy"). also it's fun that like, a bunch of my companions can just straight up fly anywhere like, werk

idk how many allies we will get but the final battle is gonna suck regardless...yikes!!

we did murder to get into the bhaal cult and we killed the red dwarf in the sarevok area and then we killed valeria :(

getting ready to ascend astarion rn (and also kill viconia de vir)

also i think the orin fight will be easier??? i hate her fight so much tbh. the most obnoxious fights for me have been her, viconia, the last one, and cazador. also a lot of the early ones bcuz you don't really get good until level 5-7 bcuz that's when you start to get better armour/weapons/extra attacks

i've gone through super fast like im almost level 11 rn and normally entering act 3 im already lvl 10 (i think i was lvl 8 entering it and then we got to lvl 10)

act 3 is my fave cuz there's so much stuff to do but like, it can be overwhelming and you have to time so many things correctly lol

yeah...im a bit afraid to see how everything unfolds but im having fun being evil lol

[dojunie]

hey!! tbh idk why im sending this in but i feel like you could relate or like understand my emotions essentially but basically i used to be so big on writing and i did it a lot until i just quit and its been almost 2 years since i last wrote anything,, but like now i've just been brimming with ideas and i have no clue how i should go about it. it's messing with my head cause i havent felt this inclined to write in so long, ive already started writing bits but i dont know how long this will continue until im burnt out.. im sorry for this lil rant your work is some of my favourite i hope your summer is going great!! <3

BRIMMING WITH IDEAS!!!!!!???? thats the best thing for getting back into writing omg

i would just start with getting those ideas onto a page. literally just ten words if need be, the general plot or theme or concept ur trying your hand at, and just leaving it there to stew; i have like 400 notes in my phone that are just like

and then i either leave them alone forever (80% of the time) or i keep dwelling on it and adding to it and thinking about it and i realize i really like this idea and decide to work on it for real (20% of the time!!!)

and i say this in the nicest way possible: who cares if u burn out?? THAT'S OK!!!! even if you just write down a thing or two before you're like 'nah ok im done for now', at least you got it out!! and just like you're doing now, maybe that inspiration will come back and you'll be ready in a week, or a month, or another year to get another stab at it!!

some of my favorite things i've ever recently written have come from random shitty wip ideas i had like, back in 2018, that i just wrote down and immediately forgot about, only to come back and be like "i was kinda onto something here...'

my summer is going great because of cool people like you <3 please keep writing, even if you dont like it, or you get bored and take a break, thats ok!!! and thank you for trusting me enough to message me about this!! if theres anyone who'll understand the idea of being super gungho about writing and then just... stopping... for months on end... its me LOL

[edengarden]

BNHA CONCERT BAND AU BC IM A NERD

IF YOU HAVE ANY QUESTIONS OR REQUESTS OR HEADCANONS AKSJHD PLS ASK ME I LOVE BAND I LOVE MUSIC AND I LOVE THIS-

Izuku Midoriya:

Boy definitely plays a wind instrument. I’m assigning him clarinet

Wants to be first chair so bad, he practices so freaking much I swear

ALWAYS. IN. A. BAND. ROOM. with Iida and Uraraka. They’re always practicing

He’s so confused with music theory, please help him. He just,, WHY is it minor?? WHY IS THERE A SOLO WITH NOTHING WRITTEN?? WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE HAS TO IMPROVISE WITH THE CHORDS WRITTEN OVER THE BARS-

Ochako Uraraka:

ALTO SAXOPHONE-

She’s also comfortable enough to play 2nd or 3rd clarinet if needed, or even soprano saxophone

Doesn’t have her own instrument, she borrows from the school and she HATES the reeds, they’re crap. When someone gives her a good reed, she CHERISHES it.

In jazz band also! With the same instrument, but she doesn’t feel ready for solos so she’s usually 2nd or 3rd. Bro when she has to switch from swing to straight she ALWAYS forgets and it’s the band’s downfall.

Tenya Iida:

TRUMPET TRUMPET TRUMPET TRU-

And he’s one of THOSE trumpet players, by the way.

“Sir the French horns aren’t tuned” yeah, he has perfect pitch

Literally plays flight of the bumblebee as warm up. Or has his own warm up scales. Never practices right before practice though, he thinks it’s “too late” for that

Has his own trumpet, it’s silver with hints of gold/brass. Takes care of it RELIGIOUSLY.

He HATES having to blow out spit onto the floor, but dude what other choice do you have??

Momo Yaoyorozu:

Sweet angel 🥺🥺 she’s an oboe player

Definitely bought her own instrument

Sight reading MASTER. she instantly gets the key bro, it’s so rare that she forgets an incidental

Definitely leads sectionals all the time. And she does it WELL.

When people (*COUGH* BASSES*cough*) slowdown, she’ll sway to the beat in hopes that they’ll follow her

Kyoka Jirou:

Electric bass or contrabass, give her either and she’s good to go dude.

Also has perfect pitch and knows her music theory WAY more than a high school student should know. She’s a genius.

Her warm ups? Jam sessions with Hanta and Todoroki. She just shouts a key and they go. It’s usually jazz, she plays a pretty constant pattern, Todoroki tries to improvise but hanta takes over pretty quick-

Definitely in jazz band as well. Also in a school competition band (like singer and stuff), also a one-woman-band. She’s in so many bands dude.

Shouto Todoroki:

TENOR SAXOPHONE

Also has a background in flute bc his parents wanted him to have ~versatility~

Knows all the theory in his head, like he knows what’s going on, he just doesn’t know how to explain it

*false note* “sorry my instrument isn’t warmed up, it’s probably my reed”

Has plastic reeds. And reeds ESPECIALLY for jazz.

Oh yeah he’s in jazz band! Loves that he’s like, the only tenor saxophone so he gets all the solos

Rikidou Satou:

TUBA PLAYER IN DA HOUUUSSEEE

Buddy actually brings the tuba home to practice, he drags that thing AROUND.

Always. Slows. Down. But no one knows it’s his fault most of the time, they blame Sero-

Firmly believes in the “basses are the foundation of the orchestra” mindset, he’s so proud to be a bass

Kouji Kouda:

Soprano Saxophone, but can also handle clarinet if the need comes (he just loves the sound of soprano sax you guys)

DEFINITELY in jazz band, but as a Tenor Sax 2 bc he knows if he went as a soprano sax he probably would’ve gotten solos

Is it Momo’s oboe?? Is it Kouda’s soprano sax?? No one knows the different except those two and Jirou

Plays Shostakovich’s jazz suite no. 2 as a warm up

DEFINITELY A SWAYER. He just gets into the mood of the music and SWAYS.

Tooru Hagakure:

Flautist!! She chose it as an 11 y/o bc it was a girly instrument but she really likes it lol

A mediocre player, she spends most of warm up with Mina tho, she thinks that she’ll get to warm up when she’s playing bc I mean— no one hears the flutes

Wanted to main the picolo for the sole purpose that it’s an Ear Destroyer. Aizawa heard the mischief in her voice and said no.

Sight reading?? What’s that?? She has no idea what’s going on, she just pretends to play and when she’s comfortable with the melody, she’ll just step in. NEVER notices key changes and signatures.

Yuuga Aoyama:

LASKHDSJ FLAUTIST!! Also clarinetist. He loves being able to stay where he is during practice even though he changes instruments it’s sort of funny

His cheeks get SO SORE when he plays clarinet though and he WILL complain.

“My flute is so heavy!” Kind of guy.

Definitely has his own instruments and takes GREAT care of them.

Wetting his reed with his saliva?? No, he plops it in a glass of water instead (the reeds are definitely his own, and expensive)

Tsuyu Asui:

Trombone gang bro.

Positions are burnt into her brain dude she’ll never go out of tune.

SO SMOOTH. SOOOO SMOOO- dude she plays so well?? It’s never spitty, but during jazz (yes she’s in jazz), if it’s a moody piece she KNOWS how to make it juuussssttt airy enough to be beautiful

Not that good with fast songs, but she makes up for her amazing ass vibrato and her range. GOD-LIKE RANGE.

Mashirao Ojirou:

FRENCH HORN!!!

Omg he plays like a king. And he’s so proud of being the ONLY one playing French horn, but there is PRESSURE, because a French horn is rlly tricky to tune dude. Have you SEEN it??

Always keeps his mouthpiece with him, as if he’s afraid someone will play his instrument?? Like no dude it’s good in it’s case but you do you I guess

He doesn’t stand out that much, but in the majestic pieces where he has a 5 measure solo?? He gives it his all and he pulls it OFF. Those moments are always the highlight of the piece

Mezou Shouji:

Bass clarinet!!

Once he managed to growl through bass clarinet and literally ALL the saxophone players were jealous AS FUCK

Buddy goes to a low E♭ like it’s nothing?? And then he goes up to like a high high C and you’re sitting there like THE FUCKING RANGE-

His warmups are like, quick scales and arpeggios. Bro he’s so steady when he plays and he could play for HOURS. Sore cheeks?? Don’t know her.

He so proud of being a bass clarinetist, but when he saw an octobass clarinet?? Aizawa better order one of those for him RIGHT. NOW.

Fumikage Tokoyami:

Baritone saxophone. Also lowkey really wants to learn bassoon because it’s such an old instrument

SKSKS he and Shouji sit next to each other, Tokoyami loves to read off of Shouji’s partition and create the WORST fourths you’ll ever hear. Even Midoriya told them to shut the fuck up once

In jazz band too!! Still plays bari sax

Such,, a good,, sound. So,, meaty,, and full,, and HOT. Bari sax is HOT!!

Plays moanin’s intro as a warm up. Search up the song. It’s bomb.

He loves to figure out new sounds with his bari sax. The Too Many Zooz type of sounds

Hitoshi Shinsou:

PERCUSSIONIST. Especially loves the bells, timpani, vibraphone and marimba.

He’s in the back judging EVERYONE. It’s so great for him, he gets to stand there and cringe and no one will know

Totally able to play 4 mallets like the king he is

Surprisingly enough, he’s rlly good in music theory. Like he could probably compose or transpose something no problem

Aizawa’s favourite, of course. Will ask him to sit in front while they play and circle the parts where he thinks something sounds off

Now that we’ve talked about the NORMAL band kids, I present to you,,, the gremlin band kids

Mina Ashido:

Percussionist as well!! She loves snares but you’ll see her pick up castagnettes even if y’all are playing something like Gymnopédie no. 3 she’s a bit confused but she got the spirit.

CANNOT READ SHEET MUSIC. Like notes?? No. She can do beats, just not notes. Let Shinsou figure out the ancient languages dude

Her and Hagakure don’t warm up, they just gossip together.

Did this to Bakugou more than once

SHE DROPPED SO MUCH EQUIPMENT LIKE HOW DID SHE NOT BREAK ANYTHING YET??

Denki Kaminari:

TRUMPET.

Buddy AIMS to have his spit land on someone sitting in front of him (rip Todoroki and Uraraka)

Thinks he’s cool because he plays trumpet, but he always loses count. God forbid Iida cant show up to practice because Kaminari will die

“Where are we? What are we doing? Which piece are we doing? Where are we starting?” Oh my god he’s so lost can SOMEONE please help him

Always gets in trouble during band camps dude. He and Sero are the Bad Brass duo

Eijirou Kirishima:

EUPHONIUM BABEY!! He thinks it’s so cool and he’ll get so insulted if someone calls it a “mini tuba”

DONT GIVE HIM SHEET MUSIC IN BASS CLEF HE HATES IT PLS JUST TREBLE CLEF

So!! Protective of his euphonium. His name is Johnny, by the way. He named his instrument.

When they finish practicing a piece, he’s the first to give feedback. Usually it’s good, like praises for classmates he heard and thought were really good!!

He’s so sweet. Willing to help others during practice and sectionals too!! It’s so sad that he’s literally on the other side of the room bc KAMINARI NEEDS HIS HELP-

Katsuki Bakugou:

Hehehe he’s a flautist. I’ve stood by this headcanon for like two years.

And he wants to be THE BEST. You never knew growling could be done through a flute until you met Bakugou.

CANNOT STAND slow pieces. He wants to go all out all the time, he always speeds up when the tempo’s slow.

Also in jazz band with what? Flute. Yeah, this is George Benson Time.

Will hit you with his flute if you ever think badly of him for playing flute. He’ll defend flute ‘till he dies.

Hanta Sero:

TROMBONIST!!! TROMBONE BABEY.

Will be so happy if he’s in charge of bass trombone?? Like yay??

Always wants to hit Bakugou’s head while playing.

Bro his playing style?? You know the like, lazy-ish trombone playing? But it’s just so full and smooth and heavy anyways? That type of shit.

In jazz band, he’s actually a natural at jazz, doesn’t practice that much so he’s like not even in a good position, buddy just slouches and sight reads.

I love Hanta sm guys I could talk abt trombonist!Hanta forever

[swordmaid]

Different anon but I guess the thing I struggle with is how Jaime is AFTER valonqaring Cersei (if he does). I don’t think he’d outright kill himself, but at the same time, can you recover from a thing like that? She’s still his sister. Then again, maybe I’d be surprised as he has left her in a potentially fatal situation when he burns her letter...

I guess I just don’t know what it says about Jaime if he does it, but i hope he doesn’t. It might make thematic sense for Cersei, but for Jaime it’s just too contrived IMO, given all he’s gone through and how he’s grown.

the absolute melodrama of that whole scene though LOL but anyway. again, for me, depends on the context as well as the entire intent of the scene. if it’s MEANT to show that they’re one soul in two bodies, live together die together, etc. if it’s MEANT to show that then killing himself after would make sense however, his journey in asos shows that that whole notion isn’t really the case for jaime. for cersei maybe but for jaime---jaime wanted to kill himself when he was captured by the mummers and it’s BRIENNE who had to remind him to live to get revenge, jaime who was willing to die fighting beside brienne, who jumped into a bearpit one handed to SAVE brienne (and he could’ve died then if steelshanks didnt kill the bear w the crossbow)--that’s not really the case for him. there’s a lot of instances where jaime was ready to die and the thought of dying without cersei didn’t even cross his mind. that whole thing is important for cersei not jaime, just as the whole valonqar is important for cersei’s character, and not jaime. 

but say in a scenario where jaime does valonqars cersei, and with the reason being that he was jealous and he did it out of spite, that jaime was written to intentionally be agot/early asos jaime again so him killing himself after would make sense since that jaime was written to ignore all of his development in asos/affc/adwd. but if it’s a jaime who kills the mad queen cersei to save the realm (say, cersei was about to set off wildfire), would he kill himself after? hmm no i dont think he would. that jaime--the one who has the development of asos/affc/adwd--his narrative arc is leading to (and this is how i personally see it) him reclaiming himself, making his own decisions, etc. if he killed cersei as another kingslayer act, why would he kill himself afterwards? though his relationship with cersei is FAR more significant compared to his relationship with aerys, this jaime is currently thinking that he has to save the realm. he eliminated the current threat, he has to make sure that once again, no one else sets off the remaining wildfire. that jaime’s current mindset rn is to make sure to elimate all threats possible and i don’t think he would kill himself after since he has to go do that first lool but obviously that’s just ONE scenario and it might not even be accurate. anyway, that jaime is already done with his relationship with cersei. he DID leave her to die when burning the letter---and he knows that, but did he think about killing himself after? no. he thought about tommen since that’s who is important to him now. 

honestly what i don’t understand is why it’s so difficult to perceive that he’s actually done with his relationship with cersei lol that’s why the burning the letter scene is SO monumental for his character arc like it’s not just him going girl bye to cersei, it’s literally him accepting the relationship he had wasn’t what he thought it was, and where they are right now with him being the knight and cersei being the queen isn’t what he thought it was going to be. and yes, maybe some part of him will still be attached to cersei because before she was his lover, she was his sister but his romantic relationship with cersei is dead and gone and burnt with that letter. jaime valonqaring her out of spite and jealousy doesn’t make sense since he’s already worked through that spite and jealousy (why do u think he was getting counseling from ilyn!!) jaime killing himself after valonqaring cersei doesn’t make sense either because we’ve already seen that the whole notion of them dying together isn’t as important to him as it is to cersei, and not to mention that cersei isn’t his priority anymore, but tommen. 

and for your last bit, for me personally (and im always gonna repeat it) context on the scene and the intent is what’s important before i can decide how it’s going to impact how i perceive the character. like i might be biased since i already have my own perception of him right now, but if that scene happens, my judgement would entirely depend on why the scene was written, the intent of it and it’s place in his own character arc. 

[klaus-is-the-real-number-1]

Goody Two Shoes (Number Five x reader)

ASK:Hello! I really enjoy your writing and I was wondering if you could do a Five x reader where the reader is easily embarrassed and Five knows that and constantly teases her but even after all that she is doubtful that he likes her? Thanks again!

Thank you so much to the actual angel who requested this ur forever in my heart n should 100% hmu when u see this, hope this is what you had in mind!!! stay fresh my dudes!! (also im british but were going to pretend that five and you are both 16 in high school. idk how the system works so i hope this is ok!)(ALSO ALL OF THE UMBRELLA ACADEMY ARE 16 AS WELL AND IN HIGH SCHOOL)

A/N: woow i did not expect it to be this long, do apologise for the angst but i hope it gets better lol, love you all have a nice day and yet again thanku to the angel who recommended this i think i went a bit off but hope its a bit like what you wanted!!

warnings: swearing, fives a bit dodgy but it gets better i swear, angst, fluff eventually, probably pretty long. 

words: 2246

The Hargreeves were an unusual bunch, they were all so different yet you could see that deep down they all cared for on another. Klaus was your best friend, even though you knew all the Hargreeves, you could always be found with Klaus. You and Klaus would often go shopping, have sleepovers and keep up to date with the recent gossip around school; as sad as it sounds Klaus was really your only friend and you hardly got to hang round with him at school, school was a whole other issue on it’s own. Even though you were the same age as Klaus, and the rest of the Hargreeves children, your high school pushed you up a few grades so you were sitting your final year, your intellectual ability was far above average, even being in your final year you were scoring 100% on all the exams. You had no one in your lessons that you knew, well no thats not quite right, you had Five.

Five. Five was a funny issue, just like you he had been pushed up to his final year and you were in constant competition with him, he was always nit picking at everything you do and knew exactly what buttons to press to get you angry and even upset. But for some reason, you liked him. You liked him a lot, no matter how angry or upset you got with him you just couldn’t help it, in a way he helped you achieve much more because for every snide comment he made to you, you’d just go and smash the next test that came up. 

You were currently sat with Klaus in his room, it was raining heavily outside, you were painting his nails for him as he rants about everything thats upset him this week. You were only half listening to him, concentrating on holding his hand still and humming every now and again.

“You know who else has been annoying me this week? Five.” He states waving his free hand around. “He wont stop asking me when you’re next going to be round, he keeps saying things like ‘Klaus, when is y/n coming round?’ and I’ve been hearing this all week, if I didn’t know any better I think he’d be trying to steal you from me.”

“I seriously doubt that.” you say with a slight chuckle, you couldn’t even imagine Five wanting you to be around, Klaus was probably just saying this to make you feel better about your small crush on him. Klaus knew all about your crush on his brother, to say he disapproved would be an understatement. He just didn’t get it.

“Honestly y/n, I don’t get what you see in him, he teases you all the time, and too be fair he’s so fucking annoying.” You look up and laugh, he gave you a weak smile looking down at his nails that were almost done, appreciating the black glitter polish you brought with you. He was about to speak again until a voice spoke up from the door.

“I thought I could feel myself losing brain cells, but of course it’s just because you two are in here together.” It was Five, he was leaning against the door frame, a smirk evident on his face. “Y/n, you haven’t been answering any questions in class recently, I hope it wasn’t because you stuttered that one time, or maybe it was more than once. To be honest, I can’t quite remember but it was still funny either way.”

That had hit a nerve, you were always so nervous to answer questions in class even though you knew it was the right answer, it was just something that happens. Feeling your face get red from his words, he continued.

“Oh I tell you what was funny,” He stepped closer into Klaus’ room, an evil glint in his eyes. “that one time that senior asked if you had a spare pen and when you went to give him one you spilt your water on him, ha!” Klaus knew all about that story, the senior is question was fairly attractive and you really didn’t mean to, you couldn’t apologise enough to them no matter how many times they said it was fine. Your eyes begin to burn, you hated how easily embarrassed you could get, you just couldn’t help it. 

“Just fuck off Five, stop being awful to her just because you fancy y/n!” Klaus said almost impulsively, covering his mouth. Now Five was the one with a red face, but not out of embarrassment, out of anger. You could see him getting angry with Klaus. Klaus would never fail to mention how Five said things he’d regret when he was angry.

“I’d rather chew my own foot.” You felt your chest getting tight, his words hurt and now you could really feel your eyes stinging.

“Sorry, I didn’t realise I was that repulsive.” You say with a quite voice, you didn’t understand how one persons words could hurt so much. You got told often by others how pretty and beautiful you are, but non of them compliments mattered to you because they weren’t from the person you wanted them from. “I’m going home.” You quickly grab your bag from the floor and push past Five, you glance at him through tears, his face looked almost regretful, but it couldn’t be. 

“Y/N wait!” You heard klaus shout but you were already half way down the stairs. “Five, what the fuck!” You heard steps chasing after you. It was pouring outside, and it was at least a 30 minuet walk back to your house, but you didn’t care.

“Y/n, you can’t walk home in this.” Klaus almost begged with you.

“Please just let me go, Klaus.” You step out the front door not giving him a chance to respond. 

The rain was soothing on your hot face, you couldn’t hear the rain fall on the ground though, the thumping in your ears drowned everything out, you couldn’t believe Five, he’d never gone that far before. 

‘shit.’ Five mumbled to himself once he heard the front door slam, he didn’t mean to say that, he was so angry at Klaus for telling Y/N his secret, he didn’t know what to do. He knew he was always a bit too harsh on y/n, he just didn’t know how to handle his feelings for them. He’d never met anyone who could challenge him and win, y/n was the only person who beat him on any tests you had in school, the only person who could distract him enough to completely forget the world around him.

“Five!” he could hear Klaus getting closer to him. “What the fuck? why do you have to be such a dick all the time! You always ask when Y/N is coming over then you go and upset her, every time, you say you fancy her and go do shit like that every damn time, you won’t have any chance with her if you keep going.” Klaus was angry, really angry. “And you know what Five? I hope you don’t get with her, she’s my best friend and she deserves better.”

Five knew what he meant, he could see that. She did deserve better than him. Five just looked down, clenched his fists and disappeared. A flash of blue and he was gone. Klaus almost wanted to scream, y/n was the best person he’s ever met, it’s almost as if he can’t have anything to himself in this house. Klaus slammed his door, hard, he was done with Five, always asking how to win y/n over and then completely ignores any advice he gives and he gives good  advice. He told him everything from her favourite music to her favourite plants and trinkets. 

It was now Monday, you and Klaus had been face-timing almost all weekend as you always do, he hadn’t mentioned anything about Five and you were grateful. You were waiting for Klaus just outside the Academy, it was a sunny day so you knew during all the breaks you and Klaus would probably be outside basking in the sun. You heard the door open and you look up expectantly.

“Hey y/n.” It was Five, he was in a crisp suit as he was always. His eyes burnt into yours.

“Oh, is Klaus almost ready?” You ask, keeping eye contact with him, not letting him intimidate you.

He goes to speak but gets interrupted by Klaus, you smile at him wearing a leather skirt and a crop top and dark eyeliner. He graciously links arms with you and pulls you off, you spare a look at Five behind you and you see him with clenched fists walk back into their mansion of a home. You and Klaus talk about his new fascination on one of the senior boys in a few of your classes, Dave, you and Dave occasionally talk in classes and Klaus practically begs you to get his number for him. You would try and do it for Klaus but you didn’t know if Dave liked boys or not but despite the facts, Klaus still begged you to get his number.

Once you get to school, you and Klaus head to your locker, the entire time he wouldn’t stop talking about Dave, you notice a small piece of paper thats slightly crumpled. In small, seemingly rushed writing, was ‘y/n x’.

“Recognise this writing?” You ask Klaus. He looks at you cheekily, without a second thought he snatched it from you.

“Hmm, I wonder what it says?” He says sarcastically as he opens it to read it aloud, reaching well above you so you couldn’t reach it. “y/n, sit with me in physics? -A x” He paused. “Who’s A? Wait, isn’t it that senior you spilt water over? Wait y/n!” He excitably garbs your arm, hitting it many times. “He sits next to Dave! y/n you’ve got to sit next to him, not just for you, but for me.” 

You grabbed the note and shove it into your pocket, you just sigh and agree, if you weren’t going to do it for yourself, you’d do it for Klaus and his weird obsession with Dave. 

You say your goodbyes as you make your way to physics, you felt nervous, you usually don’t sit with anyone and just get your head down to get your work done. As you walk into the lesson you see him sat in his seat, you smile and go to sit next to him.

“Nice to see you got my note.” He beams, he was cute, but not Five cute. You couldn’t wrap your head around how he acted this morning when Klaus practically dragged you away from him. He looked almost sad when you didn’t respond. Speaking of the devil, Five walked into the class, calculating eyes scanning the room until they land on you, his eyes then move to the boy next to you causing his eyebrows to furrow. You’ve never moved seats since you started the class. You turned to the boy next to you and started a conversation about the assignment thats due in soon, you hear a chair behind you scrape. The chair where you’d usually sit, a quick glance confirmed that it was Five, you did what any reasonable person would do and completely ignore him, all lesson. You feel his eyes in the back of your head all lesson, only to get worse when the boy next to you leant over and whispered a joke into your ear too make you laugh, and it did. 

Five couldn’t believe it, y/n shamelessly flirting right in front of him. He filled with anger every time he’d look at her, when they’d touch legs, give each other little looks but the worst moment was watching him lean over and whisper something into y/n’s ear and she laughed. Y/n laugh was almost like heaven, soft and quiet, Five desperately wanted to be the one making y/n laugh. 

You had two periods free, you began your walk to the schools library, as you do every Monday, you’d pick a book that you haven’t read and begin to make an attempt at it and even though you hated to admit it, it was your favourite part about Mondays. But suddenly, you were pulled to the side and in a flash of blue you were gone, and just like that you were stood in a room in front of the very person who said he’d ‘rather chew his own foot’ than be with you, the person who has continuously tried to put you down since you first met him, your crush, Five. 

“What. The. Fuck. Five!” You say angrily at him, you repeat the phrase, pushing him away from you when you said it. All he did was look at the floor. “You can’t just teleport me whenever you want, honestly, if you’ve genuinely just brought me here to have a go please just leave me be honestly. What the fuck.” You emphasise the last words.

“Let me explain, please?” You just crossed your arms at him, waiting for whatever response he could give you. He just sighed before continuing “I’ve been an asshole to you, I know I have, it’s just,” He paused, looking at you, “You might not believe me when I say this, but I like you, y/n” You saw the vulnerability in his eyes. “And I don’t expect you to forgive me right away, but please let me make it up to you, everything that I’ve done. I promise I’ll do anything.” You looked at him, and you saw the real him, all his cards out on the table. You let your arms drop and look down.

“Promise?” you say sticking your pinky finger out, childish, but he knew that you took them very seriously.

“Promise.” Five said as he interlocked your pinky fingers. You smile, hoping he does keep his promise.

Six months later, Five had kept his promise. You were sat on his bed finishing off work before your finals, soft music was playing in the background. You quietly hummed to the tune of the song, Five was laying his head on your shoulder, lazily watching you neatly write out equations.

“Wheres Klaus?” He asks as you set your notes to one side.

“He’s on a date with Dave.” You lean into Fives arms, he just hummed in response.

He pulled you down onto the bed and wrapped his arms around you, you listen to his heartbeat, the soothing beat sounding like music to your ears. You feel him press a kiss to your forehead, you were glad he kept his promise and made up for everything that he’s done. Five slowly gained your trust by just sitting with you in lessons to start with, then to dates at Griddys, picknicks, meals out and eventually you saying yes to being his girlfriend. It took Klaus a while to accept your new relationship but he eventually came around to it, especially since you got him Dave’s number. You were happy with Five, you close your eyes and get even closer too him, just as you fall asleep you hear him whisper.

“y/n I think I’m in love with you”

[mastcrplanncr-a]

issue #23 made me really heccin’ emo over eggman and sonic. i was prepared for it, but also ?? not prepared??? holy frick im just gonna ramble under the cut.

first of all, i’m just gonna’ idly ramble about some things i noticed.

Eggman, literally 11 issues ago:

he makes these off remarks and then changes his mind whenever it’s convenient for him smh. that or hes a freaking liar and. WELL THAT’S PRETTY TRUE HONESTLY.

i’ma be honest fam starline is a freaking mood rn. it’s ?? so dumb?? LIKE EGGMAN WHERE IS YOUR FUCKING FAILSAFE UR SOLUTION WAS “not touching the robots hurr durr” PL EASE.

In retrospect, though, this is an interesting parallel to Forces because he’d apparently learned from his mistakes. TBF, and it has been brought up elsewhere on tumblr, this is a man recovering from amnesia. He must’ve just not gotten to that part. OR HE’S JUST. DUMB AND ARROGANT. Like, yeah, sure, there’s no vaccine - lol the heroes can’t fix anything & it also means you’re valuable because you’re the one person who can. BUT COME ON EGGMAN.

my friend actually predicted this holy shit. i was rambling abt a discussion we had in the egg cult, where we were talking about the possibility of sonic infecting eggman to blackmail him into getting the cure because he’s reached the point?? hes so done with eggman’s shit??? all his friends are in danger and hes backed into a wall what else is he to do than do the one thing he doesn’t want to: use eggman’s tactics against him?

and my friend was like:

LIKE. IT IS A HUGE RISK, and Sonic went FOR IT. I’M SCREAMING TBH.

THIS CONFRONTATION WAS SO FUCKING RAW YOU DON’T UNDERSTAND. I thought I was ready for it but I really, REALLY wasn’t. I love the little details of Starline bein’ like: “oh fuck” - usually he’s pretty cocky around Sonic but uh. HE’S INFECTED NOW. And the zero remark - idk if that’s intentional on the writer’s part but ZERO TO HERO anyone?

anyway toxi broke down crying at this point. you have no idea how much i was sobbing over my blue son just. pouring out his heart to his nemesis. that’s top tier tearjerking material.  also starline passive aggressively readjusting his outfit lmfao. BITCH IM FABULOUS. but man the usage of ‘ BE’ and ‘LIKE’ - Sonic knows who Eggman is; he’d never ask him to be something he’s not. but it’s also a reiteration of sonic’s want to see good in him; being LIKE tinker is a statement in that he wanted eggman to be who he was, but NOT to go back. to do good for the world. have it be his own decision, because deep deep down:

isn’t that what he really wants?

Also, although there are those sickly sweet descriptions, the usage of ellipses in this narrative really fucks me up because you can practially hear the gradual realization in eggman’s voice. his mockery starts out so !!! but it just eventually gets straight to the point, as a list. as a routine. because he was used to it. and because, some part of him misses it. notice the usage of ‘need’ and ‘use’. they needed him, and yet he used the people that appreciated him sm like puppets.

some nice guilt there, huh, doc?

ALSO I SPENT LIKE, HOURS TRYING TO FIND THIS EXACT DIALOGUE, but Eggman has a conversation in Dark Brotherhood with Sonic and makes this remark:

LIKE??? this isn’t new to his character, actually? Ignoring the ken penders thing bc smh. Going by this game he’s actually kind of okay with that set up. And he just works so well with the others too??? this isn’t even taking into account the other games he’s teamed up with them. I’m sorry but my head just goes back to this line so many times; it’s one of the ones that stick with me, along with ‘complicated guy’ from lost world. HE COULD!! legitimately do good. and he actually doesn’t find it too bad??? IM EMO MAN...

and IMAGINE making super cool things that people genuinely like... eggman has a HUGE ego, that much is very apparent; he’s super big on appreciation as comes with. and with tinker? he had that - he felt appreciated and loved. people LIKED what he made, and he didn’t have to bend over backwards to have that. his work felt included and he didn’t have to take that appreciation by force like he did with his lackeys (which half the time was fake anyway) .

first and foremost - WE SEE THAT OPEN YOUR HEART REFERENCE, IDW. also sonic’s frustration here, in comparison to the lil smile the panel before - he’s just!! “WHY CANT YOU WAKE THE FRICK UP OLD MAN”. the justification here seems a tad bit like DENIAL to me. and the justification seems... kind of odd from him? since when does EGGMAN justify anything he does? He does what he wants and when he wants, because he’s the E.G.G.M.A.N. he doesn’t care what anyone thinks... right?

it’s because - especially with the usage of better - he didn’t like where that train of thought was going. for once, he’s justifying himself - because the alternative is admitting sonic is right. that he did like that life. that he’d want to go back. throw it in a hierachy and it’s all so simple, right?

also the inclusion of open your heart lyrics here. the incident with chaos was just as catastrophic. and these lyrics in context of the previous panel, highlights how sonic and eggman both seek unity and peace but in their own ways; eggman’s is just evil. it seems a little bit of a diversion to me - to antagonise sonic and make him forget about it. what better way to do that than to relate to him? ‘own styles that we won’t change’ highlights a stubbornness in ways, too, especially with the current context of eggman denying his old life. ALSO IT IS LITERALLY TELLING EGGMAN TO OPEN HIS HEART.

and ngl this seems like idle banter to hide the fact he genuinely felt remorse for his actions for a second. because lbr he has a habit of being all talk when a plan goes wrong or suffering inside,

which starline does quite pointedly explain.

As I was saying above, Sonic has no choice in what to do now - he’s reaching his limit. OR ELSE. hes pondering doing the thing he doesnt want to do. and honestly, ‘you can’t stop me. no one can,’ is so hardhitting not just because of its looming threat, but because of how much it solidifies for sonic that he can’t take the chance anymore. if anyone is going to change eggman, it has to be himself.

also can i just cry over how much sonic trusts tails. im getting sa2 flashbacks.

also man i’d like to point out the specific use of ‘lock you away forever’. it coooould be a reference to sonic’s time imprisoned during the events of sonic forces. bitterness?

NOT SAYING I CALLED IT, BUT I CALLED IT. it still hurts though. and wow, it really is horrifying when eggman fears his own heccin’ creation, huh?

i live for sonic being passive aggressive with eggman. give me more please.

im immensely concerned the direction starline is going, honestly. but it does say a lot about eggman; how he’ll keep trying the same things expecting different results, but failing and never seeing that. because he’s EGGMAN; every plan is brilliant by default!

i love how sonic just !!! SHOT... THE MOMENT HE WAS REMINDED WHAT WAS AT STAKE. son i love you so much you’re doing great sweetie

also, man, can we talk about eggman avoiding his blatant faults, and shoving his failures onto someone else? because this little scene here - eggman ur literally the one who crashed the thing. it had absolutely nothing to do with sonic. i feel as though this is symbolism of his self-destructive nature, honestly. hes always gotta make things harder for himself. (also starline’s face is killing me)

Eggman does what he has to, but technology won’t work every time you kick it. he thinks he can get everything through force but we have several instances in idw where force did NOT work out; you’re not gonna get far, egghead.

MHM, and just who does that sound like, Eggman? honestly the mirrors between these two are seriously destroying me. although sonic is in a horrible position, so is eggman; he likes to think he’s won the war, but hes surpassed his own expectations, and that’s going to backfire on him eventually. hes stubborn to admit he has NO REIGN over this and they’re all doomed, so he’s pinning his failures / loss on Sonic.

is that the amnesia kicking ya in the shin, eggman? or sonic’s reality check? either way, the doc hates emotions. dammit man why you gotta make him emo

future eggman is going to kick past eggman in the kneecaps. it’s times like this ur reminded how much of a kid he is. eugh but that’s work i want my victory and senseless destruction now. honestly if the doc is after success, he is certainly not getting it this way and I AM FEARING FOR EVERYONE’S LIVES. he’ll probably have to work with what’s left of the resistance like the back end of most games at some point.

I’m getting a little burnt out but i can’t forget my son and how much he hurts me.

first of all that third panel terrifies me. the fact it GOT that far does me great concern. the RED EYES? that’s pushing it fam i dont like that. the expressions are also just freaking destroying me; they’ve been PERFECT this issue. and the fact sonic is at his weakest when he feels like he’s failed everyone hurts me deeply. he has SO much on his shoulders and its getting too overwhelming for him.

also man... the whole thing with eggman... just stuff me man. but it hurts all the more because it’s so glaringly clear that there is?? some good in eggman??? he just. doesn’t want to admit it. and unfortunately these aren’t good circumstances to debate on that.

ANYWAY, THAT ISSUE WAS AGONY AND IM STILL REELING AND HAVENT EVEN. TALKED ALL THAT MUCH ABOUT SONIC HERE (on account of this being eggman’s blog) but idk if i’ll write anything on that.

gonna go cry about an egg now brb

[soaimagines]

Last Christmas

Pairing: Billy Hargrove x Reader

Word Count: 2,334

Request: Imagine based on the video to Last Christmas by Wham!

Summary: Hopper lets you all stay at the cabin the night before Christmas Eve and Billy gets a bit jealous.

Authors Note: THIS IS TRASH™ IM SORRY. Argh I hate thisIt’s so bad, I’m sorry. I couldn’t find words to write lol Anyway, George Michael was such a babe RIP 💕

You can watch the video here!

Tagged For: @yoinkpeter - @samuel-maurice455 - @total-fucktrash - @fangirlinganditswonders - @please-lives-are-at-stake - @house-in-charmingtown-imagines

____________________________________________________________________________________________________

Snow had fallen upon Hawkins, a thick blanket of white covering the ground. it was beautiful sight and you stared out the window, watching the bare trees and piles of snow pass.  

“Are we close?” You asked your best friend, Steve Harrington, as you looked out at the whiteness.

“Yeah, Hopper said there was an oak tree, and to take a right.”

You nodded and looked ahead, pointing out the large oak tree further up the road. The car swung around the corner and Steve slowed as the road reached a dead end. He pulled the car to a stop and you both got out, shivering at the change of temperature. Johnathans car was already here and you reached into the boot for your bag.

“Here, let me.”

“I can carry it!” You protested, but Steve hauled it onto his back.

“Just grab the groceries, alright?”

“Fine.” You rolled your eyes but grabbed the bags, shutting the boot of the car behind you.

“I can’t believe you talked me into this.” Steve locked the car and you were about to start the five minute walk up to the cabin when the familiar roar of Billy’s Camaro echoed through the trees. You stopped and glanced at Steve. Without speaking you both decided to wait for Billy, and walk up to the cabin together.

“You owe me for this.” Steve muttered.

You nodded. “I know.”

Things between the two boys had improved dramatically over the last couple of months, mainly because of you. After the fight you had forced Billy to talk and he had opened up, confessing his troubles at home. You had sat with him for hours, comforting him and talking through everything that had been going on and you had convinced him to apologise to Steve. It hadn’t been better instantly, but gradually they had slowly grown towards friendship and most of the time they got on; for your sake.

But there was still tension and you knew it was big of Steve to allow you to invite Billy up to the cabin. Hopper had been kind to allow you all to stay and you had thought by inviting Billy it might help ease the awkwardness between Steve and Nancy.

As the car got closer you could see Billy wasn’t alone, the passenger seat of his Camaro occupied by a girl you recognised as Lindsay Wright, a girl in the year below you. She seemed alright, if not a bit ditsy. Your heart sank and you fought to keep a smile on your face as the car pulled to a stop.

It was your own fault, really. “Bring someone, if you want.” That’s what you had told him. But you didn’t think he actually would. Ever since he had moved to town there had been something brewing between you both. Endless flirting and lingering looks, passing comments in the hallways. Neither of you had admitted your feelings for each other but you had thought it had been mutual. Maybe you were wrong.

Steve could sense the change in you and he nudged you with his elbow. You flashed him a smile and adjusted your grip on the bags. Billy hopped out of his Camaro, a cigarette between his lips and he flashed a smile in your direction before pulling a bag out of his backseat.

Lindsay jumped out, slamming the door behind her and waved eagerly in your direction. She practically ran around the car and tucked herself into Billy’s side and they walked to meet you, with his arm draped over her shoulders.

“Here we go.” Steve muttered beside you. You plastered a smile over your face as the newcomers joined you.

“Hey guys!” Lindsay eagerly pulled you into a hug, gushing over the coat you wore before hugging Steve. Billy hung back, a smirk on his face and he flashed you a wink.  

“I’m SO excited!” Lindsay squealed, clapping her hands together. “This is gonna be so much fun, right?!” She ran back to Billy and he swung his arm over her shoulder once again.

“Right.” Billy said, answering Lindsay though his smile was aimed at you.

You cleared your throat. “Let’s go.” And together you began the short walk up to the cabin, and you couldn’t help but think maybe this had all been a mistake after all.

The air was cool and you could see your breath leaving your lips as you stepped out into the porch. You rubbed your hands together and blew on them to warm them up.

“You warm enough, princess?”

Billy smirked, a cigarette between his lips as he leant against the wall. You nodded and smiled, tugging your coat tighter around yourself and you went to stand next to him. He offered you his pack of Marlboro Reds and you shook your head.

“I don’t smoke.”

Billy grinned. “Well you’re smokin hot.” He winked.

You groaned and laughed. “Do those lines ever actually work?”

“You tell me.” He flashed you his winning smile and you laughed again.

A comfortable silence fell between you as you looked out at the whiteness.

“Thank you.” Billy said and you noticed the softness in his voice. You raised an eyebrow in his direction, watching as a cloud of smoke left his lips.

“For inviting me.”

You nodded and smiled. “Anytime. You should thank Steve, really. He was practically begging me to ask you.” Billy laughed and nudged you with his arm gently.

The door opened and Steve walked out, pulling his shoes on as he went. “Wanna help me get some firewood?” He asked you. You were about to decline, preferring to spend some more time with Billy but before you could the door opened and Lindsay came out.

“There you are!” She giggled, and scurried over to Billy’s side. She tucked herself against him, using his body for warmth and you turned away, rolling your eyes.

“Let’s go.” You said to Steve, and walked down the steps.

Billy watched you leave, his jaw clenching as Steve said something to make you laugh and he took a long drag of his cigarette as jealousy burnt within him. He flicked the butt to the ground, the snow instantly extinguishing the sparks and blew out a cloud of smoke before pulling Lindsay back into the cabin.

Nancy had brought a few records from home, and much to Johnathans dismay, Christmas music filled the cabin. The fire was roaring, warming every corner of the room and Steve sat in front of it, stoking it occasionally. Jonathan was looking through an old box of records he had found while Billy and Lindsay lounged on the sofa.

You were in the kitchen, setting a saucepan on the stove and filling it with milk. Hot chocolate was an essential in December, and you had taken it upon yourself to make some for everyone. The milk was heating and you whipped some cream in a bowl, ready to go on top. Once it was done you set it in the counter and checked the milk when out of the corner of your eye you saw a hand reach I to the bowl of cream.

Billy dipped his finger into the cream and flashed you a wink before sucking the cream of his finger and letting out a soft moan of approval. You gulped as he looked up at you through his lashes and you whipped a dish towel in his direction.

“That’s for the hot chocolate!” You’d scolded.

Billy leant against the counter and smirked. He ran his finger along the edge of the bowl slowly. “Well I can think of another way we could use this, princess.”

A blush rose to your cheeks but you kept your cool, rolling your eyes and snatching the cream away from him. “Get some mugs, would you?”

Billy pushed off the bench and began opening cupboards in search for mugs.   You turned back to the hot chocolate, stirring the milk and opening the box of cocoa when you felt a hand grip your hip. Billy pressed himself against you as he reached up to the cupboard above the stove. Your breathing hitched in your throat as the scent of his cologne drifted to your nostrils and a shiver ran down your spine. His hand on your hip drifted to your waist as he pulled down six mugs, one at a time, with his other hand. Once all six mugs were on the counter he lifted his hand, flashing you a smirk before leaning back against the counter.

“Anything else I can help you with?” He asked quietly, running his tongue along his bottom lip.

You cleared your throat, trying to ignore the butterflies in your belly. “Nope, I’ve got this.”

Billy nodded, his eyes running up and down your body before he pushed off the bench and walked back to the sofas.

It was well past midnight and you watched the crackling of the fire. You were tucked up on the sofa, a blanket draped across you while Steve’s snores filled the room from his spot on the floor. The rest of the house was quiet, which you were thankful for. You hated to admit it but you felt sick at the thought of what could be going on behind closed doors, and you weren’t sure how you’d cope if you heard the creaking of a mattress.

The thought of Billy in bed with Lindsay in the next room occupied your mind and you had tossed and turned for a while now. Sleep had not come and you chewed your lip as you watched the flames licking over the burning wood. It was all too much. You needed to get some fresh air. Throwing the blanket back you slid off the sofa and tiptoed over to the door. You pulled on your cost and your slippers and opened the door quietly.

Closing the door behind you, you pulled your coat around you tightly and padded across the wooden porch lightly, trying to avoid any creaks. The moon was out tonight and you could see that it was snowing, the moon illuminating the front row of trees. You had always loved the snow, even more so when it was falling and you stood at the edge of the porch, admiring the delicate flakes floating in the air.

“Couldn’t sleep?”

You jumped, you hadn’t even heard the door open, and you turned to see Billy closing the door. You shook your head in response and he moved to stand next to you. He pulled a cigarette out of his pack before pressing it between his lips and lighting it. Out of the corner of your eye you watched him flip his silver zippo closed and shove it back into his pocket.

“Thought you and Harrington would be sharing the couch.” He commented, the smell of his cigarette filling the air as he blew out a cloud of smoke.

You raised an eyebrow. “Why? Like I told you, we’re just friends.”

Billy bobbed his head, dragging on his cigarette.

“Why do you care anyway? Thought you were with Lindsay.”

Billy snorted and shook his head. “I’m not with anyone, princess.”

Silence fell between you and you looked out at the falling snow. You shifted your weight and rubbed your hands together, cursing yourself for not bringing a pair of gloves.

“Why’d you bring her?” You asked quietly.

Billy took a long drag of his cigarette, letting the smoke fill his lungs.

He shrugged. “I thought you were with Steve. Didn’t wanna watch you makin out with him all night.”

You laughed. “I’m not with Steve. He’s.. not my type.”

At this, Billy raised an eyebrow and turned to face you, a smirk on his face. He flicked the butt of his cigarette into the snow and ran his tongue across his lips.

“Is that so?”

The tone of his voice sent shivers down your spine and you gulped. Play it cool, you told yourself, the blush in your cheeks threatening to betray you. You shrugged casually.

“I mean he’s more like my brother, and anyway he’s still in love with Nancy. Nance is great, but they were never right for each other. Did you know she can shoot a gun?”

You were rambling, and Billy watched you with an amused smirk on his face as you jumped from one topic to another. You were so wrapped up in your words you didn’t notice he had moved forward, closing the gap between you. You were throwing your hands in the air as you spoke,now rambling on about the Police Chief.

“And it’s just soo nice that he let us come up here, don’t ya think? I was gonna get him some chocolate to thank him but he’s watching his diet, not th-“

“Look up.” Billy interrupted, grasping your wrists softly.

“What?”

Billy smirked. “Look up.”

“Why, is it a spider? Oh my god, Billy, please!” You squirmed in his grasp and huddled against him, making him chuckle.

“Look up.”

You took a deep breath and looked up. There was something hanging above you and  you narrowed your eyes. You gulped when you realised it was mistletoe and you lowered your gaze to meet Billy’s. His blue eyes were full of lust and desire and warmth spread within you. He leant forward, and before you could react his lips covered yours in a hungry kiss. His lips were warm and softer than you could have ever imagined and you moaned against him as his lips caressed yours.

His tongue pressed against the seam of your lips and you parted them. He tasted like cigarettes but you didn’t care, as his tongue pressed against yours. Your hands found their way to his hair and his wrapped around your waist, pulling you close to him. His kiss was intoxicating and you savoured his lips and the soft moans he was making. A kiss like this was a beginning, a promise of many more to come.

[skzfaker]

i just finished your fic! :) it's nowhere near ready tho. i still have editing to do, and only then will it be perfect, but yay! prepare >:) also - i'd pass away if u made a book cover for it, omg. that would be so good blinking is optional and yeah, i still have a long time :) it'd be super cool to incorporate the stuff i learn into fics, but i also just finished my pre-reqs so im still really not in my major just yet. but im excited for my upcoming classes! i have done evil wizards, evil joseon dynasty era warriors, evil pirates, evil vampires... ahahahahaha. can u see a theme AND YEAH, JONGHO <33333 he's the greatest. he's so cool. i have put him through so much and he absolutely does not deserve it. i show my love in really strange ways. he's the main vocalist of ateez, right? i may have stolen his vocal cords in one of the fics as a punishment for his sins it's a very long story. I have a handful of fluff fics but it's really just majorly horror or fantasy and it's all darker fantasy lol. clearly... i enjoy the more sinister side of life. hahah i might skip but probably not. i hate skipping class ajdsjklfskl and i'd just be worried about it during the concert which wouldn't be good. idk, who knows, i'd stop a moving truck w my bare hands if i knew that by doing so i'd be able to see ateez oh, where do u live if u dont mind me asking? i figured we lived in different places because your time zone seems different than mine and thank u!!! i've just been chilling, but i also like being a busy bee, so i've been writing when i can, i'm also a lifeguard, and im trying to get a paid internship at a lab for my resume :') and yeah, i like to do a lot of things not on the computer! i play viola tho not as much anymore bc im burnt out but i still say it, write, knit, and read! ngl the first thought i have was felix's extensions in thunderous. clothes never really bother me too much, it's always hair it seems. i just like it a certain way and im not a big fan of longer hair, so i saw his extensions and sighed a bit. ofc it's just hair and i still love him but AAAAAA. what about u? - 🎅

wow you work really fast! THE HYPE FOR THIS STORY IS REAL (╯✧∇✧)╯and it'd be a honor to make the banner/cover for it! do you usually have covers for your stories or have someone make those btw? i remember back when i frequented fanfiction sites, everyone seemed to have their own banner-makers. sending you energy for the editing portion tho!

also i spent a majority of yesterday taking naps so i think my eyes are back to normal

okay that's a pretty impressive repertoire of horror-themed stories! very intrigued by the evil pirates one evil-anything needs to be more of a thing - this is why i love it when groups do dark/evil concepts (also i keep typing 'evil' as 'evel'). all the fluff and bubblegum is cute and all, but i live for the edgy and dark themes too.

HAHA OMG jongho is ariel - i love how you stole his voice HAHAHA. you really hit him where it hurts; i can already feel his crisis from over here. yeah we're definitely the same in that regard. i love my cheesy romance, but horror is still my #1 genre. i do hope you gave jongho a happy ending tho (≧▽≦)

aww man i was the same when i was a student too. i wasn't happy skipping classes and i was constantly anxious about being late. fast forward a few years and i'll take a random day off of work for the heck of it HAHAHA. hopefully having to stop a truck with your bare hands won't be the requirement for you to meet ateez tho! have you already met them before, btw? or is the concert next year potentially the first time you'll see them?

ah i'm currently staying in the philippines! what about you? i kinda just assumed you're in america - please let me know if i'm off-base there, and we can figure out just how much time difference we have tho tbh i'm a vampire so i'm up until 3 or 4 AM here

(also you just reminded me to ask which timezone to follow when it's time to give gifts/reveal ourselves on the 25th. i might give my gift too early...)

btw, have you made it home??

yay! glad you’re getting some rest! wow a lifeguard tho! i'm guessing you enjoy swimming then HAHAHA. and that you live close to the beach? ooh i love that knitting is also part of your hobby list. i used to crochet but got too lazy about it. what kind of things do you like to make?

...okay i swear i'm not copying you on purpose here, but felix's thunderous extensions is also on my list of ??? skz looks. the blonde ones that match his actual hair looked okay, but the weird greyish ones...yeah i'm not feeling it. i thought it was part of his hat at first. hmm, can't say i'm a huge fan of chan's cheeto hair much either, especially when it was so short (soz chan). what about your favorite looks?

[lemcean]

How did you know you were ready to start a Patreon? Did it seem like a big decision?

hi there! thank you for your question!!

i actually have a little bit of a story time for this one... for simple answers, go to the bottom for a tldr (i didn’t mean for this to get so wordy??)

i first tried patreon out several years ago, about when i was a junior in high school. i had gotten the idea because i saw one of my favorite artists with one, doing the kind of thing that i liked/wanted to do!! 

after seeing how she does it, i tried to imitate her and other artists i liked who did it and thought i’d be making money and i’d have a good time doing it! and... for the most part, i had been entirely wrong. i had barely done any research before heading into it, i didn’t look at my work and think of what people wanted objectively, i didn’t really critically ask myself what i was capable of

a friend or two pledged a small amount of money and i posted some things, but after a while i had burnt myself out of making content in speeds/ways i wasn’t used to under the pressure of a small but still paying audience. not only that, but i didn’t know how to market myself, and things just slowed down altogether until i decided i couldn’t do it anymore and closed it down. i stopped posting in it and i moved on back to trying to push commissions

so of course, when the idea came to me to try to start it up again... i was really intimidated!! im not a very confident artist, but i knew i had been better than when i tried last time. i’d been posting way more, interacting a lot more, and i knew some people were interested-- but after being so hasty before, i approached it with some hesitance and over thinking (but i do that with everything nowadays). the thing that led to me ultimately deciding to go through with it was me needing the money ,, lol,,,

so i worked very hard for two months. i did a lot of math, a lot of research, set up a system i could work with, asked lots of questions and sought out a lot of feedback on my ideas and then i decided, well... there’s no chance of it ever working out if i don’t just start, right?

so i did! and it may still be small, and it can be difficult sometimes, but it’s manageable for me and i’m still proud of what i’m able to do with it!!!

tldr: you’ll never be fully Ready to start most stuff like this, be it an art store or a patreon or anything like that. it took me a few tries to realize that. the most important thing though is preparedness to the fullest extent that people are capable of- testing it out, asking people for advice!! and if it doesn’t work out, learn from it and keep trying if it’s something you’re passionate about!! 

(and yes it was a very big decision even the second time i’m a nervous wreck about 99% of things pertaining to putting myself out there fhgdgjff)

[mousepatrol]

8.28.17

Yooo

Ok so today wasn’t so bad. I still don’t have internet btw, which is jjust so cool ofc… I woke up at 730 and chilled in bed for a lil b4 I got up and got dressed and got all ready for school. Catherine had to drive me bc my car was in the shop so we left at like 810 and got there around 830ish and we parked at horsebarn hill, which they added more commuter parking to! Yay! My class was in hicks so it was right there and then I had INTERNET! So I posted my replies yaaaaaaaaaay!

The first class I had was wetlands ecology and the guy doesn’t talk very loud but honestly he was kinda funny and seemed like a nice dude so I think its gonna be good and not too hard. We did an activity and for part of it you had to find someone who had been to minesota, and when we finished he called on me bc I had been there. It was weird, he asked weird questions that I couldn’t answer like which suburb was my family from??? And I had no clue… I just said we go to st paul. I guess he did his degree there so he thought I knew shit but im from cali baby sorry

Next class was in the basement of ITE so I had to RUN omg. Its already hard enough to go downhill from there to hicks, and going up sucked. But the second class was intimate relationships and OH BOY im excited for this class! The teacher sounds gay first of all which is cool even if hes not gay, and its about all SORTS off interesting things that I kinda just think I should know about. He specifically noted that hes going to try to be inclusive and we are going to talk about non hetero things which is GREAt. I drafted an email to send when im on campus tomorrow with questions about honors conversion and his research and stuff so I rly hope he replies

So then I went to the gym and did arms, and MAN my pump was awesome. I could pull 100 on the lat pulldown doing chinup grip and I could only pull like 80 last semester! I felt pumped. It wasn’t so busy bc I went at like 1130 when everyone was eating lunch so it was great yaaaaay! So then I showered and I met my dad so that he could get lunch and I could eat mine, and then I had to run nd get my last HPV vaccine shot and it hurt but I did great hehe and now im ALL DONE. No more fuckin needles for a while thank god. My arm is gonna be sore for like 4 dayss though, so that’s why I did arms today lol

Then we went and got my car and the tires apparently are worn down in weird spots so its kind of a bumpy ride but I mean… I will survive I guess. We also ran to target (altho I was fucking dying I was so tired) and we got a bike. We brought it back and at first I was having major issues and it was being shti and I thought it might not be good, but I took it around again and actually I think itll be fine. So hopefully thatll help me get around campus because last year I was fast walking a lot abd honestly like what the fuck. ALSO the buses are fucked up because theres a road closure and basically you cant get anywhere so I wanted a bike to jst be able to go fast. Its in my trunk and im gonna use it tomorrow… wish me luck

I came home and my dad eventually left and he gave me a card that had 140$ in it omg thank god I can actually pay for groceries while I wait for paychecks for a month. I took a shift Wednesday n ight with Meagan so things should get moving in that respect, I hope. Aw shit I GOTTA remember to bring my work clothes on Wednesday then, wow. I should have time to change and stuff. Ill also need two meals… ill figure it out I guess uhh

Btw I was so annoyed bc I cried a little when my dad left because I feel so bad that HE feels sad about leaving and it just makes me feel shitty… im in this weird limbo where like… he is still mean to me sometimes and he does bad things but its not as bad as it used to be but the past still HAPPENED sso I mean? Im not forgiving him and I cant ever feel comfortable around him and I just. I guess I feel like I should never feel sad abt it and im really not I just. Idk. Im not really sure rn.

Made some food and chatted with Catherine a bit, almost burnt my nachos but I saved them. The broiler is quite hot here. Then I excused myself at like 930 because omg I needed to fucking write like, im gonna get nothing done if I just get stuck talking to Catherine for hours every night. But tomorrow im coming home at like 330 and she wont be here for 2 hrs after that so hopefully I can chill and maybe make rice then and get a head start on things… that would be good. I have to do some reading for both of my classes so far but im not good at reading during the week, I might see if I can wait and read it/catch up/read ahead on the weekend when I have more time. Catherine will also be gne then and it’s a 3 day weekend so I think thatll work out well honestly

Well I gotta go to bed now I have a class at 930 and I gotta go early to work out this bike so bye