#im sick of this !!!!! im sick of going to school every god damn day i hate it!!!!

[twipsai]

GRAGJGHGRHRGR

[buckysh0e]

I Want More

Requested!

oh perfect girly can i request a jj maybank imagine a smut one where jj and i are best friends and he has feelings for me and we go in the house and he kisses me and we have our first time doing different sex positions like hes on top and im on top a lot of kissing can it be smut/angst i love your blog page thanks girly xx🩵🫶🏻

@jeremiahxaesthetic hope you enjoy!!

JJ Maybank x Reader

Warnings: SOFT!JJ || Smut|| best friends to lovers || a lil bit of sub JJ || kissing(obvi) || a bit of angst at the end || mentions of the nickname princess

Summary: Being best friends with JJ ever since you were kids, but things change between the two of you

You had just gotten home from a long day of hanging out with Sarah Cameron, you’re family we’re kooks, but not you. You were a pouge and let’s just say people had their opinions.

You were sitting on the couch with some soft music playing in the background, you were about to doze off when knocks on the front door made you jolt awake.

Getting up to answer the door and being greeted by the most adorable smiles from the one and only JJ maybank. You’re best friend.

“JJ? Hey what’s up you okay?” You asked opening the door for the blonde male to come inside “yeah yeah everything is good, great now actually” JJ replied and gave one of his famous grins that make the ladies swoon, especially you.

You and JJ have been best friends ever since the first grade, the two of you were practically attached to the hip and that didn’t change even in high school, but over the years you started to see JJ a little different, his hugs gave you butterflies, his smile made your heart beat faster and his flirty comments made you weak in the knees. You had developed a huge ass crush on JJ maybank.

You smiled at the blonde in front of you “really? You weren’t good before?” You asked and sat down on the couch while JJ went to grab a beer from the fridge “well of course but being with you just made this 1000 times better” he said as he walked over plopping down beside you and turning his body to face you.

“So there’s a party at the beach tonight, you comin?” JJ asked and you shrugged “I dunno I might stay in” you replied and played with the Bracelet JJ had given you for your 14th birthday. “Fine guess I’m staying in to then” JJ said and put his arm around your shoulder pulling you in closer so you were practically snuggled into his side.

“You? JJ maybank? Stay home from a party? Are you okay? Are you sick?!” You looked at him causing the blonde male to smile “no there’s no point going to a party if you won’t be there” JJ replied looking at you and his eyes glancing down at your lips every so often.

You could feel your cheeks heating up and you could practically feel the smirk on JJ’s lips.

The two of you stared at each other a little longer than expected, you noticed JJ moving closer, his face only inches from yours ‘was this happening?’ You thought to yourself, “what happening to no pouge on pouge macking” you whispered as JJ rested his head against yours “screw that rule” before you knew it his lips were on yours.

You kissed him back immediately, everything was falling into place, JJ’s arms snaked around your waist pulling you into his lap, your hands found their way into his messy hair as the two of you made out.

JJ’s hands roamed up your sides and hips before moving to your ass, you moved/grinded in his lap causing a groan to escape his lips “god….do you know what you do to me princess? Being around you everyday? Having to fight the urge not to bend you over the damn boat and fuck your brains out?” He said as he pulled back from the kiss “I want you…I need you” he begged, JJ maybank begged for you and you knew this guy to never beg but here he was holding you on top of him begging to have his way with you, how could you say no to the guy you’ve loved for years.

Clothes were scattered across the living room floor, thank god you had the house to yourself for a week.

JJ’s head was between your thighs eating you out like a starved man, your hands were in his hair pulling and gripping at it as his tongue pressed against your clit while his fingers fucked into you.

“Gonna cum princess?” JJ asked kissing your inner thighs “I can feel you squeezing my fingers” I smirked as he thrusted his fingers into you fast “fuck please Jayj” you whined bucking your hips into his hand “come on princess cum for me, I want it” he groaned as he went back down sucking on your bundle of nerves as he finger fucked your cunt.

It didn’t take long for your orgasm to come, you arched your back and let out a loud moan as you came around JJ’s fingers, the man before you smirked as he removed his fingers, he watched you as he licked them clean “god….sweet as ever” he moved forward pressing his lips against yours which you gladly kissing him back.

JJ pulled back “I want you to ride me” you looked at him and smiled “please..I wanna feel you around me princess, please” he begged again “whatever you want..I’ll give it” you whispered before pushing JJ to sit up straight before you climbed into his lap hovering above his throbbing “you want me to fuck you jayj?” You asked wanting to tease him a bit, JJ gripped you hips “yes…yes please I want it” you couldn’t help but grow more turned on by his begging.

You positioned yourself and lowered yourself onto his cock, the two of you moaned softly, you began moving up and down as JJ pressed kissing onto your neck and chest leaving very visible hickeys, not that you cared anyway.

You picked up the pace bouncing yourself up and down and feeling the knot in your stomach from, JJ’s moans alone could make you cum on the spot “princess….fucckkk I love you..I love you” JJ said into your neck as he nuzzled into you, you didn’t expect him to come out and just openly say those three words “I’ve always loved you..hell I’m crazy about you…I want my world to be about you” JJ said moving his head to look at you.

Your heart melted at his confession so you cupped his cheeks “JJ….I love you too” you said rubbing your thumbs against his cheek bones “I’ve always loved you” you said as a smile broke out on your face and the same for JJ “thank fucking god” he said and lifted you up and laid your back against the couch before entering you again.

JJ thrusted like a mad man, he held your waist as he fucked himself into you, you were taken back but god you loved it “Jayj…fuck! I’m gonna cum again please..please don’t stop” you begged as you dug your nails into his back “yeah? Wanna cum for me? Wanna be a good girl and cum?” JJ asked continuing  his fast hard thrusts into you, your walls tightened around him “fuuckkkkk that’s is…cum with me yeah?” He looked at you with such love.

You nodded and held onto JJ as he thrusted faster into you you babbled his name on repeat till both your orgasms approached, you arched your back letting out a loud moan as you came around JJ’s cock, feeling him cum as well making him pant and lay his head in the crook of your neck.

Thank god for the pill

JJ waited a bit before pulling out of you, and cuddling into you, he kept his arms around your waist as you massaged his head.

The two of you stayed like that for a while using one of the couch blankets to cover them, JJ lifted his head to look at you “I meant what I said….I really do love you princess…hell I was afraid that you wouldn’t love me back..” he mumbled looking away for a moment “since knowing my family background..” he added “JJ….I don’t care where you come from or your background…I have loved you since 1st grade..and I’ve been waiting for the day you’d say you love me too” you said cupping his cheeks “well….I have loved you since the moment I met you..your entire existence made me love you” JJ said looking at you “I’m utterly in love with you” JJ said and I smiled stupidly “and I love you too JJ maybank..forever and always”.

[emloafs]

ep by ep thoughts (ck s6ep4)

THIS ONE IS MY FAVORITE EPISODE (iykyk). i haven't recovered from it. spoilers below!!!!!!!

EP4

You’re telling me the episode opens with hawks ugly ass American flag hair? Shut the hell up. and no one comments on it????

NO WORDS JUST THE SHOT FOCUSING IN ON DEMETRI OVER ELI’S SHOULDER LOOKING LONGINGLY LETS REPLAY THAT

“Each and every one of you has a shot” as its a shot of Anthonyy (Anthony does not have a shot xo)

“Its really only that 6th spot that’s up for grabs” “yeah and its yours for the taking” ELI BELIEVES IN HIM SM STOP

Sorry to say I eat my words the fab 4 will not all be making it, and neither will hawk, you can just tell from how overconfident they are

It is the way that my entire body is reacting to having average, every day content of binary bfs at school and its ruined by Eli’s FUGLY HAIR and HORRIBLE OUTFITS 

I do appreciate that demetri is still demetri and he’s like there’s an 18% chance of me making it and I know that so it is what it is academics over karate has always been my thing

“MIT cannot turn down the binary bros” OH NO MITS GONNA TURN DOWN THE BINARY BROS

I think Eli is having second thoughts about MIT or he thinks he won’t get in 

I love them being normal in high school!!!!!!!!! Cancel the karate half of the show I don’t need it

THE BABIES BEING FRIENDS THE BABIES BEING FRIENDS ANTHONY DEVON KENNY BROT3 AHHH

Idk how ep4 is gonna go down but it’s my favorite already 

The camera work is fire

Okay kiaz cartwheel… go off? Ig?

NATE YELLING FUCK???? IM DYING

“Mucles” “I HAVE A NEW NICKNAME!!!” This is Mitch’s season fr

Actually rooting so hard for demetri <3 call me biased

Kisses for baby Anthony throw him a bone

Anthony is SO TALL NOW?

“The power couples and hawk” honestly that’s the best way to describe them let’s coin that

Devon better be picked fr actually she needs a win and she’s better than most of them

NOT YASMIN SHOWING UP IN A MINI SKIRT WTF

Not me imagining Yasmine walking into the dojo and she just finds dem and Eli making out

Omg are they breaking up

“I’ve come as far as I can go, and I can live with that” that’s right dem and you’ve done great

“Youre breaking up with me?” “No!” Damn. So close.

Why does his girlfriend have to be the motivation ugh

“Just like MIT, you’re not going to Barcelona without me” LOVING MY HAWKMETRI CRUMBS THEYRE IN LOVE

“I didn’t apply” MMY JAW IS ON THE FLOOR GENUINELY

Eli doesn’t want to let dem down :((( 

Oh shit he’s gonna tell him and demetri is gonna be betrayed and kick his ass low key

I personally love capture the flag <3

Omg eli’s literally not gonna make it his head is in the clouds about college and demetri brother get it togetherrrrr 

If Anthony makes it to the tournament and not Eli im suing 

I am scared of barnes

Ok power couples saw that coming

JUSTICE FOR ELI IM GONNA THROW UP

Daniel is a bloody nose Anthony will be fine

Angsty Anthony idek what do with you

Oh god Johnny and barnes fight in a warehouse with power tools WHY just WHY

Oh I don’t like when demetri and Eli fight I hate this game 

Eli won’t hurt dem again and if they come to a head, and frankly demetri is going to destroy him

ELI NOW IS NOT THE TIME TO TELL HIM OH I WANT TO CRY

DAD AND DAD STOP FIGHTING I CAN’T TAKE IT I SAID I WANTED THE DRAMA BUT I WAS WRONGGGGG GO BACK TO BEING BACKGROUND CHARACTERS STOP THE VIOLENCE oh god im UNPACKING this scene later

Hawk buddy you’re fucked. Demetri is going to kill you. Honestly. I’ll start picking the flowers for your funeral.

Eli’s outfit sucks in this btw I need to speak to wardrobe

OH SHIT DEM FOLLOWED ELI THEY’RE FUCKED

No way… Kenny has the runs… this his sabotage.  That sucks literally that’s gross and embarrassing. You’re all dead to him.

IM SICK TO MY STOMACH ABOUT DEM AND ELI 

I JUST GASPED

I DON’T LIKE DARK DEM

HOLDING HAWKS ARM???? “How do you like it?!” IM GONNA THROW UP 

Eli loves him so much it hurts and dem is so mad at him 

I ACTUALLY AM SHITTING MY PANTS THAT DEM WON

IM CONFLICTED im really proud of my baby but dear god am I worried about Eli

Thank you writers for not making dm a background character <3

KARATE DADS CRUMBS: Anthony comforting hawk after he lost <33333 he’s like I hate when my dads fight fr

Devon obv put the laxatives in his water right… OH YUP it is now confirmed 

I like really actually cannot believe the hawkmetri fight…………… like……….. holy fuck did that just happen? The arm thing?????? Holy fuck

Why does it feel like they just broke up

Someone hold me.

(I enjoy the pain, though. Episode 4 IS my favorite.)

[understandableparadox]

Bottom of the barrel isekai: b-rank adventurer with an evil look becomes a daddy to the protagonist and his childhood friend.

Well if i'm reading it, that's a goddamn lie, hello! Pull up a chair, drink my tea, piss on my wife, you have the most control in this world because you are the specialist lil fella that can do not a lick of wrong! It's time for another bottom of the barrel isekai review! Today, you can read the title above, go fuck yourself if you think im going write it out every single god damn time.

Come out boys, girls and some other thing, frogs? Is that what the enbys like these days? Frogs? Anyways let's do the song and dance!

Our titular main character is a dude from japan, they wasted their live away being a disgusting fucking neet and playing video games all the live long day, being a whale in pirates 101 and domeing me from across the map as widow maker on royal!  

Anyways he fucking Dies and gets reincarnated in the game he and his singular friend dearly loved known as bright fantasy, now as we can see in the picture above, perhaps he reincarnated as some sorta giga god, perhaps his party abandoned him because they didnt understand the monumental boon a tax accountant has in another world… perhaps he was summoned by the king to Fuck his wife for him! 

Wait a second… is that a sharp detour…? FU-

Anyways gray is reborn as a Thug Npc, or someone with a dark background, his looks mean, he has a average appearance and some fucking sick shoulder gaurds.  He is a moody lil nobody, which is why it's such an insane hook to see it open with two children begging to be adopted by him in the opening

Now before you get too scared that we are running into uncharted territories since we haven't had anyone betray anyone and the MC has not turned god inside out, we get to dive back into the cool cocoons of familiar fantasy tropes with the adventuring ranking system. I'm not going to bother to explain it, if you got a letter grade in school then you know what it means. Get close to the A and that means you are the Big Boy adventurer who does the Big Boy quests. 

Now i do appreciate the authors restraint and only making him the Second Biggest boy and attempting to make him Not A Twink

We almost have a guy who is on a bulk and not a cut, sigh, one day. 

Anyways we pull back ground tall dark and who cares to learn that these two are matchstick kids. Dead broke kids who are attempting to sell flowers they have picked to the people on the street. They were attacked by nobody you are going to remember and get healed by gray. They then decide to beg him to save their ailing parents because I guess wonka isn't around to give golden tickets to get them out of bed or whatever. 

They tell them their names, one of them has the super special name of the Super Main Character. What a coinkyDink. Gray knows that if he is to be a villain (???) then his job is to avoid it. Luckily he went to the Katarina claes school of villainy and decided that ethical action is actually more important than meta narrative logic. 

Cut to Tiny tims lakeside property and we see the rest of the family living the fucking dream!

I'm so sorry, i have this mental tick where i accidently say “dream” instead of “nightmare”.

Also Stella is a vampire, why? Fuck you thats why. 

They explain that they have been getting by by the skin of their teeth through a combination of the street urchin grind set of selling flowers and getting church donations. Gray beats up some assumed child abductors outside and gives a somewhat creepy smile. 

Next chapter is about Gray stealing an orcs' balls to create a high end potion (viagra) to nobles so he can get enough money to buy something called a “home”? I'm not sure what that is exactly, i'm not sure what the translator was talking about, i've certainly never heard of someone “buying” or owning one for certain.

I don't actually have much to say about this guy, this is the guy who makes the ball potion for gray, I just like him, he has a funny face, I like looking at it. He looks like someone I would trade yugioh cards with while he tells me about his super cool oc and I would listen because he is a fun dude. 

But yeah, the manga is mostly about this guy being a slightly more psychotic late stage kratos, being a dad, trying to raise a bunch of random kids he found, trying to give the main character a taste of normalcy before the plot kicks and and shit goes sideways, oh and sometimes he brutally kills people. 

His main goal is to have a family and that's about that. 

So let's start getting into things. 

The title has no interest in creating an expansive world that is original, everything of it is meat burrowed and stitched into its own narrative to support its own plot line and to explain why this happens and why that is occurring at this point. Now I do not believe that this is inherently a bad thing. In fact it's fine. Not every single manga needs to be the next genre defining piece of media. In fact we need things that are average, we need things that build the genre or else we can never have exceptions to the rule.  The magic system, the team system, the classes, the guilds, the plot, it's all what you would expect from something with final fantasy inspirations. Semi (not really) complicated fighting systems that only make sense to pad out the loving tedium of a game. “Complete this many quests of this level to rank up.” “collect this many monster parts to complete the quest” and so on and so fourth ad infitum until god has to pop out and ask what the fuck is going on. 

The art is great in places. Most of it is very bog standard, you aren't going to get that much out of it if you are expecting groundbreaking designs that really make you scratch your chin in wonder at how they made something like that up. But it's very clearly competent and knows how to give each of its characters that needed cover before you read the book. People that need to look like unlikeable thugs look like unlikeable thugs, children that need to look sweet and innocent look sweet and innocent. The artist is really good at goofy expressions but they are a bit few and far between to really satisfy my desire for evil fucked up faces, oh kekegurui… if i didnt hate your plot so much i would be so much more obsessed with you… 

The tropes I've already gone over. It uses every single trope but more so in the way someone would do if they were playing a new game plus. You don't want to do the rigamarole of the heroes rise so you make them overpowered and whatever so they can get to the stuff that you have deemed important, that being fatherhood simulator and housing market simulator. The world is secondary to the plot the author wants so they grab the tropes they want to ensure they can focus on that part of the story with impunity while hand waving some other things and give ol daddy gray his badass moments to make the editors happy that this is infact enough of a power fantasy. You know, to keep those freaks that actually buy the manga happy. 

As for kink stuff, none that I can see. The author only seems to want women to fawn on the main character so they can complete the golden vision of the dead emperor abe of the nuclear family, perhaps hoping to tempt his blessing from beyond the grave… 

This was a little bit of a boreing read. I cant entirely recommend it, but if you want to see some edgy boredline twunk be a dad to a bunch of random kids he adopted then yeah, go for it lmao. 

[lemmilemura]

it’s ur girl pine back with another request that’s secretly an unfinished draft from my notes app

okay so the reader is friends with maeve, and one day she invites them to a party (specifically one that jake hosts, this is important) (no it’s not i just like drama)

but the reader is kind of put off by the idea since they don’t really like parties. but yk it’s just this one time and maeve seems like she really wants them to go with her so they decide to get a little more information on it so they can be prepared (idk i honestly didnt think about why they ask questions but just go along with it 😭) so they ask maeve who’s gonna be there. she says smthn like “eh idk, jake, probably the rest of his group, me obviously, and simon” (reader hasn’t met simon yet, but they know who he is, they also don’t think AT is as bad as everyone makes it out to be) (very odd take but were gonna roll with it). and so when the reader eventually goes, them and simon eventually get like alone together and he starts conversation with them (prob says like “hey, are you y/n? i think maeve has mentioned you a few times.” or something)

IM SORRY THIS IS SUCH A LONG REQ BUT YEAH!! also you can decide what happens after simon and the reader are alone together, im thinking the reader like kind of realizes ‘oh shit this guys kind of fine’ in the like 30 minutes they talk to each other BUT YOU CAN CHANGE IT HOWEVER YOU WANT🫡 (also sorry this isn’t as good as my others it was kind of rushed)

At this point, you should just become my source of ideas xD Because truth be told I am running out and you always have great ones, Pine!!!!!🌲(I tried looking for a ferret emoji too, but I didn’t find one, so now you’re just 🌲 hope that’s okay)

All kept gender-neutral Based on the show

 "I’m really not sure, Maeve. I mean, I brely know anyone at Bayview, let alone Jake." Maeve was trying to convince me to go with her to a party hosted by a guy at her school. We didn’t go to the same school and I didn’t know anyone, besides Maeve and that one Simon guy, but only because he has an app or something that people are making way bigger a deal than it should be. "Oh c’mon! For all I know, you barely leave the house! I mean, if nobody knows you, that’s even better! No way for you to embarrass yourself. Pleeeease just come with I beg you."

In the end, it took a few more minutes, but she did manage to convince me. The days leading up to the party, she kept talking about it, telling me about all of the people I'd probably see. She kept bringing up Janae, I was convinced she had a thing for her, and Simon. The day of the party, though, I was considering just telling her I was sick, I wasn't really feeling like it'd go well. But I still decided to go, I said 'fuck it' and went.

Though, after only a few minutes, I had already lost Maeve. Great. I was alone at a party at someones house who I did not know, with people I didn't know. The kitchen always seemed like a good palce to go, especially when most people were outside by the pool. Also in the kitchen you can get drinks, just water to be honest, but sometimes that's really all you need. I find an unused cup and just get some water from the tap.

Suddenly, this guy walked in, and my god he was hot. Like goddamn what god or demon did his parents make a deal with to make him that attractive? I’m not even kidding, he was just that good looking. I damn near choked on my water, I had to turn around and face away from him out of embarrassment. He didn’t say anything, maybe he didn’t even notice me. He walk around like he owned the place, he knew where everything was, every cup, drink. Maybe he’s Jake’s brother or something. Or maybe that is Jake? I thought.

He suddenly seemed to notice me. "You’re new." He simply stated. I nodded, trying to stay calm. "Maeve invited me." I replied. He raised an eyebrow, making him only more attractive for some reason. "That mean you’re (Y/N)?" He asked. Holy shit hot guy knows my name. Stay cool, stay calm, you’ve got this. I nodded. "Funnily enough, I dragged her here. ‘m Simon."

WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK? THAT’S SIMON? MAEVE WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME HE WAS HOT?

I tried my best to stay calm and not let my shock come through. I took another sip of my drink, hoping it would help. "You don't go to Bayview, do you?" He asked. Again I just shook my head. He looked me up and down, making me even more flustered, somehow. "Shame." He said, and just... walked off. Just liek that. This man flustered me to my core and walked off like it was nothing.

Honestly I don't remember much of the rest of the party, I was really just trying to calm down, also half debating if I should switch schools. Genuinely. Luckily, Maeve soon (maybe, I do not know how long it was) came back and we decided to leave.

"So, how was it?" Maeve asked. I grabbed her by the shoulders and started shaking her. "WHY DIDN’T YOU TELL ME THAT SIMON’S HOT? THAT IS A VERY IMPORTANT THING TO KNOW!" Maeve only laughed at my reaction. "Okay, while I do agree, he is good looking, he can be a pain in the ass sometimes." I must admit my face did betray me in that moment. I found that out because Maeve gave me a look, then started laughing again.

[carpenoctemnyx]

Every single little moment in NPMD in order that just scratches my brain in the best way. I mean tbh the whole show does, but these moments are what the tism is grasping onto.

(WARNING: Its a LOT of moments, so theyre all under the cut since the post is so fuckin long)

"And I can survive it for only so long"(all of them)

The "im so fucking dead" from the ensemble during steph and pete's convo

"'CHEATER!!' 'OH GOD BUTT OUT CHASITY!!'"

"My melody! My melody! My melody"

"AWOOO! AWOOO! RAWR!"

"Grace just be cool! NEVER!"

"Im so fucking dead! YEAH!!"

"No! I wanna be invisible! Then why do you come to a public school dressed in suspenders and a fuckin bow tie?"

"Sycamore? I'd rather starve to death."

"Oh my god!! YOU'RE Micro-Peter! Oh, god."

"This outfit it the tapestry of my trauma!"

"Anyone every do this? *snap* Every damn day. My titties are tenderized!"

"It's polish."

"Spankoffski! Who are you running from? Ehh."

"He's straight ahead!"

"You wont defeat his kind. Never look in the eye. He's a literal monster!"

"Everyone knows how he BANGS!"

"He roars, and we cry, hes the reason with no why. He's a literal monster! A damn literal monster!"

"It's 3rd period, Shit-lips. I gotta get to remedial algebra."

"I never intended to walk through your hallway. Ohhh well theres a difference between intent and impact."

"FUCKNUGGET!!"

"Haha YEAH! NO dumbass!"

"Ohhh sorry! Fresh out of your favorite food! I guess im just gonna have to flick it!"

"Ohhhh a two bagger? Hahahaha! Whats a two bagger?"

"Oh!! That's so sick bro! Thats so fuckin funny! PYAHHH *punch sound*"

"Get him up!! Get this fucker up!!"

"Now deposit this trash in the nearest receptacle."

"Haha haha hahaha! Spunk! You're funny."

"*appalled* carry my books!?"

"Chasity, come on! You're breakin my balls."

"You dont know me very well, do you??"

"Watch some p0rn! You'll see! Tell me im wrong dirty girl. Dont call me that!"

"My little dirty girl *that one audience member OHHH*"

"And his name is Jesus Christ!"

"Forbidden fruit, dick hole!"

"You can leave, but you wont, stay in your seat!"

max's lil dance when hes singing "better leave your hopes behind no ones gonna stop me" that leads into that lil airplane arms move

also including the dance move with kyle "you wont defeat his kind, never look in the eye"

"You can watch as i rise! I will claim what is mine!"

"Learn to multi-task!"

"Well, well. If its not my october surprise."

"Stephanie, please, I'd like to have an intelligent conversation with you. In other words, shut up."

"Hooow ominous"

"Hey that looks like my... phone. It is."

"Please daddy?"

"NOO!! *dives forward and shoves hand in the way* Did you just put your hand BETWEEN the hammer and the phone??? ...yeah..."

How... am i supposed to study withOUT LISTENING TO SPOTIFY!?!? DO YOU EVEN KNOW WHAT YOU'RE DOING?? YOU'RE KILLING ME WITH WHAT YOU'RE DOING!!! If only, Stephanie. If only."

"This project's on thermo-dynamics. What the fuck are you talking about?"

"God! I just want someone to touch me! Anyone, PLEASE! Jesus! Calm down Ruth."

"Somebody walks to the office with Stephanie LauTer and suddenly he's Stefan Urquelle."

The way Richie Says peTe and uuusing you

"What was it like when she touched your arm? DID YOU CUM??? Ruth! Quit it!"

The way Richie says peTeR

"I'll never hold the real Rei and Asuka in my arms"

The way Pete says "Sorry!" To Ruth when his phone is ringing

The way Richie says TelemArkeTer

"NANI!?!?" *Ruth and Richie creeping towards Pete*

"What is she saying? What the FUCK is she saying!?"

"Oh my god!! Oh my god!! What's the matter with you guys!?"

"WEEOO WEEOO!!"

"I'm actually the smart one in the group, if you can believe that."

"Really Ruth? A star wars analogy? Need i go into why Attack On Titan is superior in EVERY possible way!?"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP!! Excuse me? Uh, not you. Just these two FUCKING nerds that wont leave me alone."

"They dont call it a cram session for nothing! Watch some p0rn! You'll see!"

"You're telling me I gotta be funny, AGAIN? I didnt do it on purpose the FIRST time!"

The way Richie says opportunity. It sounds like opportudidy

"Thats your perspective"

"Oh whoa whoa oh"

Then again im deranged"

"What if people see me as someone other than who I am"

"If i can finally be cool i will know that im not a loser!"

"I'm the ruler!"

"OHHHH! *crowd cheers* SHUT UP!"

"EUGH!! So you're a POOR piece of shit then?"

"Well im sick of your sh-sh-shit"

"SHUT THE FUCK UP JASON!!"

"I dont give a fuck what she said! I did not consent to this rendez-voos!"

"I decide if Kyle can date Brenda. *turns to Jason* The answer's still no... by the way!"

"I willed it into existence"

"Im your God. Now on your knees, bitch. It's time to say your fuckin prayers! *cuts to the Chasitys* Amen!"

"Mmm, that house. What's wrong with it? Its haunted. Everyone says so."

"DAD GROSS!!"

"Mom will you pass the butt stuff? The butter. Butter. Will you pass the butter? Eheh I just want some head and butter. BREAD! BREAD! Bread and butt sex to go with this big shaft of meat im gonna choke down. Ohhhh boy. Oh criminy!"

"And theyre flyin reaaal low today"

"Some big, dumb, sexy, sweaty, hooot, football star"

The way Grace says "Hello??" When fantasy Max is calling her name

"Im hungry, and here you are brewing up a big ol' pot of dirty girl soup *siffs aggressively* ahhhh! My favorite!"

"You call my bath water dirty girl soup? This is wrong! This is sooo wrong"

"I know!" *max rips off his jacket and the crowd screams*

"I love... to FUCK!"

The entirety of Dirty Girl Soup song but extra extra emphasis on certain parts

"Hey boo, daddy needs a little of that dirty soup"

"You're lookin all filthy like, you know its wrong i know its right"

"I'll never ever tell ya to behave i am expecting you to be-betray me"

"Ima love you all night long" including Max's lil hip thing

"Oh! Dirty dirty girl wont you sing for me wont you love me like you dont care. (all of these esp the ones with Grace)

"Hey brute"

"Its clear you never stepped in a classroom" including Grace's lil dance move here

The way Grace says School

"For shame. I am expecting you to be-behave" including Grace's lil dance move here too

"On your knees pray along, if you wanna last until dawn"

And then the dirty dirty girl section including the dance

"RAH-AHH" *hand wave thing* and the second one of this too

"Got me hungry for more. Hungry for more."

"Im a im a im a good girl x4 WHO ON OCCASSION GETS DIRTY!!"

Again cue the dirty dirty girl bit + dance

Grace's lil shaky moan thing after "poisons the air"

"Damn these wandering hands! Damn these sinful loins!"

"This is a no-moan household!"

".....I'll get the plunger...."

"Girl! That must be so embarrassing for you."

"Standing up the mayor's daughter like he's got no fucks to give? Not gonna lie. Thats really sexy."

"Oh my god! The fucking bowtie kid??"

"Hey uh... dweeb! *both Richie and Ruth respond* yeah?"

"Oh shes touching meee! Luckyyyy!"

"Its better than i even imagined" *cute lil twirl*

"And what, pray tell, may that be, Stephanie?"

"God, you suck, Grace."

"Isn't this like breaking and entering? Im not breaking anything. My dad's the realtor!" *jingles keys*

"Hacked em to bloody bits!"

"PottyPants? How about PissyPants? Im not comfortable with the plan if it involves that kind of language."

"Im not comfortable with this place. Its not structurally sound."

"Don't bully me!"

The whole Bully the Bully song but extra extra emphasis on specific parts

Grace's lil snap and spin moment

"Petey gonna jump on out" *Pete's lil move here*

Ruth saying "we're gonna cut off his nips!" And then Richie's lil shimmy move

"Ahhhhahhhh"

"Richie the whole point is that its in the dark! Well then im gonna have to shoot the whole thing in a wide, and its gonna look like shit!"

"No! We're gonna be cool beans. We're gonna keep the beans cool. We're gonna gonna keep the beans, beans the cool, keep the beans, the cool, keep the beans, bean school. Beans school? Excellent!"

"I still wanna talk.... Hello...? Hello....? Hello? Who was that? My boyfriend! Sounded like a telemarketer. Okay, my EX boyfriend."

"You're the best friend ive ever had. Oh thats sad. I think im in love with you. Okay..." *walks away*

"Am i reading as ghost, or Lin Manuel Miranda?"

"You kinda look like that homeless guy from downtown. Ohhh. But that could still work, he gets pretty scary sometimes."

Ruth's lil butt wiggle

"I mean you could just hit it and quit it, bro! Yeah... I dont want to though... You're fuckin useless pete!"

When Max walks up and burps and says "i gott piss" and this does a cute lil bouncy move

"Oh shiiiit. Wheres that creepy music comin from?"

"do it alfuckinready"

"Who's there? Maaaaax Jagermannn. WHAT!?"

"Oh shit! Oh fuck! Its a fuckin ghost!"

"Its time to stop running!" *chugs bear and smashes the can on his head and yeets it, then puts up his fists* "float over here ghost,* starts punching the air* im gonna kick your fucking ass!"

"Uhhh you cant fight me im an etheral being soooo... we'll see about that. Ima make you say boo-hoo, bitch! *charges at pete and pete runs away screaming* YESSSS I MAKE THE DEAD RUN IN FEAR!!! I AM JAGERMAAAAAN!!! I AM GOOOOD!!!! GOOO NIGHTHAWKS!!!"

*skele-ruth runs ins and does her lil scream thingy* "oh shit! Oh fuck! I didnt think there'd be a skele'en here! Im so fucking scared of skele'ens! Maybe i should just run! Where, Max?? Back home so Dad can call you a little cuck?? Can't even fight off one lousy skele'en?? No! I got not choice! Hey, Skele'en! I got a bone to pick with you, bitch!"

"It's working for me! He's sooo violent!"

Ruth's lil yelp after steph tells max to stop

"Steph we cant have a party here! This place is hella haunted!"

"It's all a prank. A trick to scare the shit out of you cuz you deserve it. What??? You're telling me you nerds put this whole thing together just for me? Wow. I though you guys hated me. But thanks. This was really great. You're not pissed? Oh! Are you kidding?? Nonono this is like THE nicest thing anyone's ever done for me."

"Ohhhh! And the skele'en. Oh. That was really special" *Max bows to Ruth*

"Look what you fuckin nerds made me do! I pissed my fucking pants! ....mission accomplished???" *Pete signaling to cut it out and Ruth and Grace behind him like wtf Richie*

"This wasnt murder! And it wasnt an accident! It was an act of God!"

"Oh yeah! Like thats gonna hold up in court! He was smote!"

Grace's snap and spin again and Richie groaning "oh nooo shes snapping again!!"

"We're gonna hack all his limbs off! Did you say hack all his limbs off?? Yeah! We're gonna hack all his limbs off!"

"You want me to films this!?!?!?!"

"Aaahhhahhhh"

"Thank god Max is gone. Wasnt he your friends?? YEAAAAHHHH but he forbade me from dating, AND he wrecked my dad's Ski-Doo. FUCK that guy."

"Good news! You passed the test?? With flying colors! Oh-ho! Aaaaaa C+"

"Ya know, this is really your C+. Oh... Steph... you can keep it. It'd really bring down my GPA."

"No, Jagerman doesnt let nerds go to footba-... huh... you know maybe i will."

"Go, go Nighthawks! We'll take the fight unto the victors go the spoils! Go, go Nighthawks! We're taking flight we are the leaders and the royals! AHH-AHH!" Including the lil bird wing flappy thing

"N! I-G! H-T! AHH-AHH! KS!"

And the dudes in the background goin "Night! Hawks! Night! Hawks! Fly!"

"Fuuuck you Clivesdale go get fucked! You're fuckin losers, and we'll kill you! Kill your ass!"

They're my bros for life!"

Richie struggling to take off the mascot costume

"Ohhh. I remember what /I/ said. Do you? You FUCKIN NERD?"

"That aint good news for you, ya bitch"

"You shouldve joined the smoke club, you nerdy prude! NERDY PRUDES MUST DIE! *cue Jon bein fuckin goated at imitating a levitation* Nerdy prudes must diiiie!"

"I want you to repeat after me. Okay... Who will pray for me? Who will pray for me? When im gone? When im gone? Until another Richie, comes along. Can you repeat that one? WHO WILL PRAY FOR MEEE WHEN IM GONNNE OR IS THIIIIS THE ETERNAL DARK WITHOUT A DAWN! Who will pray for you? Who will pray for me? When your body's gone? When my body's gone? This is the consequence for what you've done! I'M NOT A LOSER! WHAT DID YOU SAY!?! ᵈᵒⁿᵗ ᵏᶦˡˡ ᵐᵉ. Im not a nerdy prude. Im not a loser! Of course nooot, Richiiie."

“He wasn’t sexy at all… MAMA IM CURED!!!”

“Shoot n shinola!”

“Mornin Daaaaadddy!”

“You don’t say? You don’t say! Welllll I’ll be down there in a jiffy! What did they find dad? They didn’t say!”

“Gosh! I hope it’s not termites! Haha”

“Ohhhh heck. I’m so heckin fudged!”

When the gang is getting called to the principals office and Pete just says “oh no” in like a monotone-y way

“Dont look at me! Get your hands out of your pockets! ….sorry sir….”

The reluctant “go nighthawks”

“Shut the fuck up Ruth!”

“We lost to CLIVESDALE!! FUCKIN *kicks chair* CLIVESDALE!!!”

“Yeahhh… thanks for NOTHIN!!!”

“Yes Ruth! We are fucked!”

“People tell me to die everyday!”

“Someone spilled the beans! All our cool beans!”

Again Ruth’s “Don’t bully me!!”

Pete’s lil “no” when Grace accuses him

“I’m gonna get those pigs off our backs!”

“Shock! Despair! Tragedy!"

“I’ve never known darker times, and I covered the protest live at the Hatchetfield Kennel! I am Dan Reynolds! With action news, week days at 10pm.”

And down down down down, who’s swinging the hatchet now in hatchet town! Someone’s got their hands on the hatchet handle. Swingin on the youth it’s a hatchet scandal. Careful or your folks will end up a cannibals plate. It ain’t great! You’re better on the run than you are hiding, suddenly this quiet town’s exciting.”

“I heard that their brains were soup, their intestines cut in two. So it’s gotta be Donna! What??? Yeah it’s gotta be Donna! DAAAAN!?!?!”

“I certainly don’t LOVE killing”

“Barry’s on the loose and he’s got a gun, and he’s got a motive to kill. IM IN A HURRY!!!”

“Get your hands off me!!!”

“Careful or your kids will end up on Charlie’s plate. Excuse me?? He just ate! How dare you!”

“Singing all these songs gives him greater windows to kill, but we’re singing still!!”

And now THIS PART. The ENTIRETY OF BRYCE CHARLES’ SOLO. It’s fucking transcendent!!!

“Until GERALD! went on his murder spreeeee! I KNEW IT WAS GERALD!! Linda, call my lawyer. Let’s kill him!!”

“Can I shit or will I drown??”

“Ohhhh barbecue monologues, eh? I saw that in New York. Really? How was it? Fuckin ✨transcendent✨”

Joey's whole monologue thing here but extra emphasis on “Every Kah-bob”

“I wanna remember who I am….”

Trevor’s “My barbecue!”

*ruth throws hands up* “I guess!”

“Betcha I could do it! Betcha I could!”

“in my dream, it’s MY barbecue!” *ruth’s little arm wave thing*

“How can something be medium AND well?”

“All of the trappings of the well to-do!”

“And life is fine, if only it were mine.”

“Judge me!”

“And the world’s a stage, when you’re middle of age.”

“It’s well done on the outside, not within! OOOH!”

“Oh ohhh just for once! Just for once! Just for oooooonce!”

Ruth’s cute lil tap dance move

“I used to dance. I used to dance”

“Oh nooo my anxiety *gags* I’m gonna hurl!”

“I believe your next line is AAAAHHHH”

“Project Ruth! They can’t hear you in the back row! Ow, my butt! You’re splitting me in two!”

Max slowly putting the “underwear” over Ruth’s head and then petting her

“Take a bow, bitch!”

The theater director’s dramatic screaming

“No nonono! You can’t do this to me okay?? This isn’t my fault! This isn’t my plan! Woah woah woah who’s place was it Grace? IT WAS GODS PLAN!! And now he’s leaving me out to dry! DO SOMETHING YOU SON OF A BITCH!!”

“Don’t! FOLLOW ME!”

“And he gives me his numberrrr! Very smooth!”

“EXCUSE ME! *audience screaming* I have been waiting for what feels like five fucking years and I STILL have not received my goddamn hot chocolate! Sorryy sir *deadpans fake spitting* here you go. …thank you….”

“MY dad sells women’s shoes!”

“Don’t spin this back on meee”

“Because you’re crazy about me. …..WHAT!?”

“On the first date, Steph? Have some respect for yourself!”

“If I loved you, you would know it. If I loved you, I would show it. If I love you like you should be loved. If I loved you like I’m capable of. If you were the one I’m thinking of, woah ohhh, oh babe I’d let you know”

“Wake me up when you turn eighteeeeen”

“LEAVE ROOM FOR JESUS!” *shove*

“Did they buy it? Ha!”

“Gimme a cup of hot water, and make it strong!”

“Does your phone plan cover calls to hell?”

“She’s bisexual and dead! Where else would she be??”

*whips out gun* “JUST COOL YOUR BEANS, STEPH! Just cool em right the heck down!”

“Shut the front door, spankoffski!”

“SIR! DOOOO NOT APPROACH ME! GET YOU HANDS OUTTA YOUR POCKETS! PUT YOUR HANDS DOWN! HE’S GOING FOR A GUN!! *runs at paul*”

Pete’s “HOLY SHIT!!” When officer bailey rushes at Paul

“STOP RESISTING! STOP RESISTING!” *cue Emma screaming*

“You ruined our lives Grace!! I knowwww *sobbing* I just haven’t been thinking clearly lately. All I wanted was to be a regular girl, with no sexual desire, until she was safely married. I never asked for this tickle in my mommy spot. I’ve done so many terrible things, like touching myself and lying to the police. …..and dismembering a body….. well… we all did that, so…. But I called god a son of a b-word. Who am I!?!? *more sobbing* ohh.. it’s alright Grace. Don’t comfort her. She’s fuckin weird.”

“Stephanie, please. I’ve been bugging your phone since you were 12.”

“I don’t give a shit who you kill, but you just HAD to go and do it in that house, didn’t you?”

“A book??”

“You mean… satan? Oh no… they’re much worse.”

“K-yuck, k-yuck, k-fuck!”

*head gets thrown on stage* *collective screams* “Damn you miss tessburger! You were worthless!”

“Nerdy Prudes must die. That’s not me! I’m an elected official!”

“I can buy you beer!”

“I hate politics! It’s for NERDS!”

“Pete get behind me! I’ve got a gun! Steph, it’s a ghost… I don’t think that’s gonna do any good…. On the ground, bitch! I’m a cop!”

“Heck! Heck no!”

“Are you a woman of faith? Catholic. I’ll take that as a no.”

“He’s right there! WHAT THE FUCK!?”

“Pete, is she okay? Can you feel a pulse? I have no idea what I’m doing.”

The entirety of the summoning scene. It’s my favoritest part of the whole show.

Extra extra emphasis on “we don’t give a shit about your phone!”

Max’s slow mo run beat boxing to stop the bullet

“So you do know the Bible”

Grace taking her hair down and shaking it out

“Grace what are you doing?? SHUT YOUR FUCKING FART HOLE SPANKOFFSKI!! I wanna hear this! As you were saying Grace….”

“Brewin a pot of dirty girl soup, just for you! What?? Uhh, It’s what you call my bath water in my sexual fantasies. *GASP* that’s nastyyy….. I like it.”

“What… the fuck… is happening right now!?!?”

“GRRRR! I’ll be right back!”

The background dialogue of Grace and Max and then Peter saying “holy cow they’re doin it! Grace is having sex with a fucking ghost!”

Grace sauntering out and smoking a cigarette and saying “wooow I needed that” and then max being baby girl and swinging his legs in the air and saying “where you goin? Don’t you wanna cuddle a little bit?”

“I paid the price, now fuck off” *Grace twirl*

“Nonooooooowwwhatever! It was fuckin worth it!”

“What the fuck you just say to me!?!?”

“Mom said it would help me make friends. Boy was she wrong.”

“Liek eye dew”

“That was… absolutely disgusting!!”

Graces evil laugh “the souls of the pervs make me strong” more evil laughter

“DIRTY DUDES MUST DIE! DIRTY DUDES MUST DIIIIEEE!!”

“RUN YOU LITTLE BITCH”

“Darkness will spare my soul”

“Run dudes. RUN”

[just-a-queer-fanboy]

The trailer unveiled at that one con (idk which, I wasn't there, wish I was) is making me fucking feral

Like I could make a separate post on every single clip shown because I'm just so in love with this damn show

So I'm just gonna list off my favorites.

Barbie wire is coming, she's hot asf, her voice suits her PERFECTLY, I just love her, especially her tattoos/birthmarks/scarification?

Stolas awkwardly going ".....sexy?" While someone is attempting to fucking kill him is weirdly in character for him

OH GOD HE GETS STABBED IM GONNA CRY

Moxxie gets to be the true girly pop we always knew he was

Barbie wire fight scene barbie wire fight scene barbie wire fight scene barbie wi

Andrealphus. Something about him makes me really wanna shoot myself /j

And did I mention B A R B I E W I R E

There's another shot of sick ass demon possession stolas I just love when he does that it's so cool

I'm starting to hate fizzarolli less (my love for Alex brightman is helping that)

Striker striker striker striker striker striker striker striker

FIGHT SCENES SO MANY FIGHT SCENES I LOVE

Usually I say to eat the rich but moxxies dad has too much visual appeal (no I'm not hitting on him he just has an interesting design)

My friend Caleb (met him on scratch, he's very nice) watched it and now we are both going feral over it

Vivzie is my favorite person ever like this show brings me so much joy it has literally kept me from committing die several times /gen

Anyway I have school tomorrow, I gotta go to sleep. I'm gonna be thinking about it all day hyperfixations are the best thing to ever happen to me

[reedsaloser]

mmm when i do long ramble things, it’s usually about my younger cousin, and now it’s 9 days until her bday and i’m back on my bullshit.

in 2020 it was 13 days before my cousin’s birthday that our grandma had a seizure at work. then it was 9 days before her birthday that we had a name for the cause: stage 4, terminal brain cancer.

i remember being 16 and sitting with my family discussing what it all meant. the brief time we knew we’d have with a grandma that was as she always had been, but no longer would always be. i stepped away for a minute and peeked into the bathroom where Grandma and kenzi sat making slime potions. my aunt and uncle had just said they weren’t going to tell her about the finality of this cancer yet. there was no recovery, and grandma didn’t want to go through the pain of it all— the chemo, the radiation, the loss of hair, the sickness. she had experienced it all once 6 hears before and had no intention to suffer again.

yet she sat in the bathroom with her almost ten-year old granddaughter and was doing all she could to make memories that could carry her for the rest of her life.

i remember the first family dinner 7 days before my cousin’s birthday where we all sat and played cards at the table. even my grandpa, known to not want to play “those damn card games” sat at the table. grandma sat at the long edge between me and my cousin and taught us (finally) how to play her favorite card game. we had an unofficial rule you needed to be 17, and she threw it out and showed us how. kenzi had no clue why she was playing; if me and her played card games, it was only ever uno or phase ten.

on november 20, 2020, my cousin’s birthday was the last birthday my grandma was fully there for. she could still sign off on her cards with her typical, well practiced hand. she danced and sang and made possibly the worst cupcakes ever (she never could cook or bake, but she loved to try)

it’s not til the last day of march 2021 that i found my cousin had never been told grandma wouldn’t recover.

it’s on that same day that she became like a little sister to me.

i love that kid and now she’s turning 12 and suddenly i’m wondering where all the time went. you were 3 you were 5 you were a blur and now you’re in middle school and you play clarinet because I play clarinet and you want to grow up as passionate about something as i am. you sit next to me in a bingo hall (which grandma would have loved to do with us!) and you and i play grandma’s favorite card game on the couch. and god you love to read and make up songs and every time you do, my heart breaks a little because you’re growing older and when do these days end?

when will you skip out on time with me to be with your friends? when did you become so important? when did i suddenly know your interests and lamaged to find the perfect birthday gifts (i think) for you when your mom couldn’t think of any?

im not sure what the point is here… memory, family, realizing its been 3 years since my grandma sang happy birthday, but anyway

(i can say it spawned from her crying when i said i couldn’t get down to her parents for her bday since i work)

happy early birthday, kid. i hope you never read this

[andvys]

ANDY!! how are you? I just caught up with the last 2 chapters and they were amazing!!

“Uh, it’s your birthday present.”

oh??? 🤨 is that a bomb

He scratches the back of his neck, “uh well, apparently Ray is a fan of pocket knives,” he laughs. 

omg i remember in school when we were like 14 boys used to bring pocket knives with them and that was scary cause wtf

You weren’t good enough for that – he did not want to change for you. 

NOOO DONT THINK THAT BABY

“She is not you.”

steve... what the hell.

“She’s not the one that I want.”

ANOTHER STRIKE BACK TO BACK???

“I know,” he whispers, frowning at the ground, “I know, I’m sorry. I-I made a mistake and I will regret it for the rest of my life.”

the rest of your- BOY

“We both made mistakes.”

girl... i don't think you did tbh

“I was a fucking asshole, y/n. I was an asshole to you, every day of our relationship, I kept fucking up, over and over again and you tolerated it, you never left me. You never got mad at me, you never said anything rude, you never did anything bad, you were – fuck, you were perfect, you are perfect,” he holds your hand tighter.

yeahhhh she's way too good for you

“I’m sorry that I acted like I wasn’t interested in the things you loved doing. I’m sorry that I didn’t show you how much I really loved you. I’m sorry that I didn’t hold you enough, that I didn’t kiss you the way you should have been kissed, that I didn’t take care of you.” 

took him long enough 😭

This year he can’t even hug you.

BOOOOO

“I’ll throw it away later, huh?” She asks, mocking him. 

OH I'D BE PISSED TOO NANCY

Her eyes have strayed away from him just a few weeks after he left you for her. The moment Jonathan stepped into her life, her heart was no longer his, she gave it to her supposed new friend. 

OH SO YOURE BEING PLAYED LIKE YOU PLAYED Y/N AHAHAHHAA

It makes your stomach flip – you don’t know why. 

girl... calm your horses 🤨

“Uh, the store!” Robin says, sheepishly as she gives you a crooked grin. 

SHES SO ME 😭

“Oh my god, y/n!” Heather snorts, “stop joking about it or you’re actually getting them someday!” 

i would actually jump off a cliff if it happened to me 😭

Apparently you are pregnant with Eddie’s baby and living in his trailer. 

NOT THIS

The pregnancy rumor made you physically sick – it made you stand in front of the mirror, checking for signs that you had gained weight. You did not, it still made you feel nauseous and you had to cancel your dinner ‘date’ with your friends. 

OH NO BABY :(((

“You have no idea how much I wanna get rid of that title,” you laugh, “I’m ready to give that position up to Chrissy.” 

girl we don't have cheerleaders here, do you know what i would do to be a cheerleader?? 😭

Jonathan shrugs, refraining from rolling his eyes, “cause you’re the captain of the basketball team and she’s cheer captain.” 

CAN PRINCIPAL MAKE IT EVEN MORE AWKWARD

Jonathan huffs with a soft chuckle, “yeah, you look good but uh, Steve? You’re supposed to look into the camera,” he says awkwardly. 

PFFF THIS IS SO AWKWARD IM—

“That uh, that was our dream. I only wanted to go to college with you.”

bro really based his whole life on a high school girlfriend 😭 that's bravery

“I got a job at the ice cream parlor,” he clears his throat, “Scoops Ahoy.” 

YESSSSSS OMG WE'LL GET SAILOR STEVE (and Robin? 👀)

“The one I’m pregnant? The one where he sacrificed a lamb to get my undying love and devotion? The one where I cheated on Steve? Which one of them all?” 

NOT THE POOR LITTLE LAMB 💀 was it served with hot sause

“Y-You look amazing is what I’m trying to say,” Nancy says nervously. 

enemies to lover arc with Nancy? 🫨

“You’re a little oblivious, aren’t you?” 

A LITTLE

btw how did you like 1989 TV? 👀 honey anon

BESTIE HI!!!!

I’m doing okay!!! I’m excited for Christmas season! 🤭 how are you? 🩷

OMG NO!!! why would they bring pocket knives to school 😭 (i got one too but only because i’m afraid of men LMAO)

Nancy had a reason to be pissed but damn girl, you stole someone’s boyfriend 😩

Robin buying the store bought cake is so relatable. I love baking but the moment I gotta bake a cake for someone I always fail 💀

AND WE DONT HAVE CHEERLEADERS HERE AT SCHOOL EITHER!!! 😭💔 like you can join a cheer team as a hobby but there’s no cheer teams or sports team in general at the schools here. I would’ve definitely been a cheerleader too if we had that here 🥲

And the principal ships steve and reader 😌 he cried when they broke up 😪

You’re definitely getting Steve and Robin at scoops ahoy with they’re cute little sailor uniforms 🤭

Also enemies to lovers with Nancy? Imagine if that was the plan all along 🤭 Nancy’s song would be Mastermind then

I LOVE THE VAULT TRACKS!! I love all of them but especially Slut! and Say don’t go (but is it over now? too ugh) AND I KNOW PLACES THE GROWL IN THE SONG? I SCREAMED 😭😭 how did you like it? 🤭

[xxxairheadedangelxxx]

having pain induced emotional epiphanies while on the treadmill is somethin else

had an entire screaming match w RM in my head over how he is incapable of planning literally anything for himself which is why it seems so easy to find every little fault i have bc I am in charge of quite literally everything that keeps our lives running on a daily basis.

he was incapable of even just planning a trip for himself to visit his bf I had to fucking help him and make sure he had everything and walk him to the gate. Which do not get me wrong in concept I dont mind! Ive always been the doer, give me a thing that needs to be completed and I will do it and support you all the way!

its when you turn around and rip me to fucking shreds anytime something goes fucking wrong bc I am one person managing two peoples god damn lives while being frankly incredibly fucking disabled mentally and physically.

even better when those disabilities are treated like they dont fucking exist until someone can use it to martyr themselves bc they are just so big hearted for helping the crippled autistic idiot not fucking pass out in the middle of a crowded room. Or they took time out of their day to make sure I didnt have a screaming crying hyperventilating melt down at an event.

Nothing is ever wrong with me until it makes you look better. RM is like this. My mother is like this. Old friends were like this. I am absolutely perfectly fucking functional and have no excuse for being incapable at something until it makes you feel fucking good about yourself.

Im a burden. IU fucking get it I understand I do nothing but fucking burden the world around me by existing and wanting just a scrap of fucking accomodation you stupid cunt.

You want so badly to be the more sick, tortured, opressed minority that it can't even occur to you that maybe I have problems that impede my ability to literally fucking exist and that has kept me suicidal since fucking childhood. I know I have crippling all body pain, constant headaches, bones that are constantly fucking dislocated and a near constant inability to breathe but ur right that is absolutely nothing compared to your jaw pain that you gaver yourself and refuse to fucking fix and I have no idea how you feel of course Im so sorry.

I know I was incapable of completing school, damn near incapable of holding down a job, have a laundry list of processing/learning issues and a propensity to going fully nonverbal at the slightest provocation of stress but youre right I seem normal when I talk to people so you are way more fucked up than I am of course I am so sorry

fuck you. i fucking hate you and i fucking hate how i dont actually fucking hate you. I hate the person youve become. I hate the man who raised you for creating this disgusting putrid version of you.

[1nsanelust]

Hey, the last time (first time) i wrote here was back in june. A lot has happened (not really). School has been a b word.

The end of June my dog got sick but he pulled through in July, thank god because I don't know what i would've done without him. August was just a bit overwhelming because of that and school didn't help with that feeling. September was quite hectic, the first two weeks were rough just because I was way over my head and they started assigning so much stuff. And the fact that i dont have wifi doesn't help. Because how am I supposed to do my work if i dont have wifi? Also I've been missing a lot of school. Anxiety kicks my ass every year. I feel like sometimes I'm just dramatic about stuff because my parents are always saying I am so then I just feel like shit about it and end up crying later on. But i wish people were just mindful about stuff like damn keep your opinions to yourself. If you dont have nice stuff to say then dont say it at all. Anyways, I saw Bruno Major since he went on tour this year. If you don't know who I'm talking about. He's a singer, quite talented in my opinion. Genres are r&b - soul. If you like that then you should check him out. His concert was quite fun and I enjoyed my time but the crowd was kinda lame. A week or two later I went and saw arctic monkeys. I was over the fucking moon. They've been my favorite band since the 7th grade. The first song I acknowledged was ���no buses’ if i remember correctly and woah i've been hooked on ever since. I was like a little kid all over again. Like I had no worries in the world. To this day I still can't believe I saw them.

Now it's october. Still on cloud nine from that day. But the only difference is that im filled with anxiety, stressed as heck over the fact that i have an essay due, two pieces of class work due, a packet to finish for tuesday, a stupid mock trial to read, plus i have to move all my shit out of my current room because my sister is moving back in, AND i have to get a gift for my dad, it's his birthday soon. And my parents wonder why I'm stressed. ‘You don't work, what the hell are you stressed about’ (they didn't exactly say that, they don't speak english but they said something similar, just not in english of course).

Until later, bye lovelies, take care.

(if you're wondering how i managed

to upload this, i go to coffee shops a lot.)

-Lust

[royallygray]

OOOH THE PERI RESPONDED :D

The Scott and Cleo getting married for tax benefits is firstly: just good? since Scott does Not want to be too close to anyone Not Chill abt villains so he's just straight up not dating.

it's actually really sad for Scott and Cleo when you look at it from an outside perspective of "damn, theyve altered their entire lives to fit Pearl's life" and... yeah. that is what it is. It's sort of a parallel/statement to people who break their backs to keep their parents or like bio family in their lives even though it restricts them from doing what they want. Also Scott and Cleo have thought over this several times. And while Scott and Pearl rejected the soulbond at like 18/19 (she's a year older than him), they've been adults for a while now and they have civil conversations. And Scott does stand for Pearl's major end goals, just not her ways of doing it.

But the issue between Scott and Pearl (I fucking LOVE thinking about their dynamic because it's so bloody complicated) is that Scott cares about Pearl, and Pearl does Not care about Scott. Other than keeping him alive (bc then she'll die), she doesn't give two shits about him. However, she trusts Scott. But Scott doesn't trust her, because why the fuck should he.

Like, yes, he hears all her thoughts, but he doesn't trust her in the sense that he is On Edge around her constantly. ALSO IVE ACCIDENTALLY DONE THAT BUT THAT'S PART OF MY HEADCANON FOR THE LIFE SERIES

Pearl trusts more people than she cares for. Scott cares for more people than he trusts. The amount of people Scott trusts are about on par with the amount that Pearl trusts.

I'm so fucking obsessed with them it rivals Joel and Etho. Or Joel and Joel. Speaking of I need to write that and make them kiss. they haven't kissed yet. Joel and Joel need to kiss. they're probably gonna make out courtesy of cc!GeminiTay but yeah

Anyways Scott and Cleo getting married for tax benefits is directly inspired by Tubbo and Ranboo in dsmp. But also there's no one else they'd rather be with. And no one else they could be with. And also they love each other to death.

I'm so proud of Evo Elementary. It's directly inspired by my elementary school, at least in vibes and size (while I was going). It's a very small school. Literally only Evo gang and some random filler mfers and also Lizzie went there.

It also got shut down immediately after Jimmy graduated. Because of cult activities. The Watchers. idk if I said that in the other one, but yeah. Essentially, they were getting taught by Watcher followers. Not the Watchers themselves, since those are like actual gods, but like. cult followers.

I GOTTA DO MY DUOLINGO BEFORE I FUCKING LOSE MY STREAK HOLD ON

right. I've done it. also I high-key wanna quit but I'm in too far now. bro. I'm almost at a year. I can't stop now. which means I can't ever stop because it'll take another year to get to here. like. anyways.

BACK TO STUFF

Also I STILL HAVENT WATCHED THE REST OF ASMP. EVEN THOUGH ITS FUCKING CRUCIAL TO GUQQIE'S CHARACTER WHICH IS LITERALLY IMPORTANT AS FUCK. BECAUSE IT'S ASMP!GUQQIE AND ASMP!AIMSEY. AND I JUST DON'T FUCKING KNOW THEIR STORY. BECAUSE. IM FUCKIN LAZY OR SMTH

or maybe I'm just not hyperfixated on watching content rn. like. I could watch Life, but I'm not--ooh that reminded me of the cereal. god I haven't had cereal in so long. I used to eat cereal every day for breakfast and then in Covid I got sick of it and broke my literal years long streak

hey like duolingo

eh

nah

Anyways the Life cereal is good but if it gets too soggy it's ass because the sugar pieces fall off and also it's literally mush.

also do you cereal and then milk or milk and then cereal. because cereal and then milk is the only correct answer. you can milk and then cereal if you have leftover milk from your first cereal but you must do it in that order. cereal, milk, then cereal. maybe more milk if you need it. cereal if you want more. keep circling. until you're full. om nom nom

anyways.

Jimmy is four years younger than the rest of the gang (Grian, Scott, Cleo, Mumbo, Lizzie) and five years younger than Pearl. I just didn't want to write him into EEP bc I'm lazy

Also he meets Tango when he goes to Hermit Academy. Tango's a year older. also it's not rude at all I'm very interested in your questions and it's all good and I love it :D

Well Pearl doesn't actually rob people, is the thing. She and Martyn (and Lizzie. And BEST+TIES. And Grian) have day jobs.

Pearl is a CEO. She is the boss, under the alias of Luna Syzygy. I forgot what the last name means. I think it's something about Eclipse or smth? it's something about the moon and sun bc skyblings. y'know.

Anyways Pearl runs this redstone electricity company (oddly fitting since she made the wordle. like I made her this WAYY before that happened.) and Bdubs, Impulse, Etho, Tango, Skizz, and Lizzie are all employed there.

Bdubs (idk if he does redstone) is employed because it also semi works as an architecture thing because they need an architect to understand how buildings work so that they can put the wiring in there. Sometimes Mumbo shows up, but mostly he sticks to his own thing. Pearl also does architecture, which is why she's the CEO. She also founded the company.

Did I mention that it's called Lunar Enterprises? Also the top floors are the order of operations for villainy, but like. it's literally just BESTIES' and Pearl's offices.

Lizzie's the front desk secretary. She likes chatting with people and also being a massive BITCH to whoever doesn't care enough to respect her.

Hold on I'ma make a list of jobs

Bdubs - architect of Lunar Enterprises

BigB - Hero (heroes get paid bc it's government funded blah blah blah)

Etho - redstoner of Lunar Enterprises

Gem - Hero

Grian - he's like a carpenter thing person

Scar - Hero

Impulse - redstone engineer of Lunar Enterprises

Martyn - works in some sort of customer service. or some type of supervisor at something. I really don't know

Lizzie - secretary of Lunar Enterprises

Mumbo - electrician but redstone. and also inventor

Pearl - CEO of Lunar Enterprises

Ren - Hero

Skizz - moral support of Lunar Enterprises, probably also a teacher or smth. BAND TEACHER. yep

Scott - surgeon

Joel - loves his wife. civil engineer and works to make roads and shit work

Jimmy - uhhh vibes. literally no idea. art coach. private art lessons. or maybe some sort of sports. but art. OMG FILM EDITING. yes

Tango - redstone engineer at Lunar Enterprises

Cleo - college (university for the Brits) professor

why are there no women in stem I've made a horrible mistake

actually Pearl is CEO which means she's a redstoner, redstone engineer, and also an architect. so I've helped myself out there.

Cleos a history prof btw. but is also just Good aka she knows science and math and just everything bc I said so

I would make Scott god awful at math courtesy to cc except he's a fucking surgeon

oh yeah Scott gets his soul back dw. it just takes it while Pearl's using it which is very very bad and it does actually slowly debilitate at his soul (def used that word wrong)

GOTTA EXTEND DUOLINGO BRB

okay I'm back and I've done more than extend Duolingo but we're back

it doesn't have... incredibly lasting effects? like Pearl taking Scotts soul power shit. but like. it's like a muscle. the more you use it, the faster it's used to it

the first time which is the one you did fanart for, it wasn't actually that bad. it took a lot, but it was pretty easy to regenerate.

But Pearl kept using Scott's soul as a backup and it regenerated less and less and Scott was anxious as hell because he needed to use his soul too. (it doesn't get used nearly as much when you're the one using your own soul, bc that's what it's built for. it's not built for over extension [which is what Scar doss--] but it's def built for you to use. 24/7, even, but you have to work up to that)

that's so unclear I'm so sorry

also I haven't read wof lol

i read the first book and then the first two chapters of the second bc all my friends were OBSESSED

And like other than the dragons. actually it was pretty cool it just wasn't really. my style ig? like the politics of it are actually interesting when I think about it and I- ah I didn't like the characters that much. hm.

being reflective as I've gotten older has been very interesting imo because it lets me figure out WHY I don't like stuff

like I used to not like onions "because they taste bad". and then I learned what texture was and I was like "they're an awful fucking texture and they should die" and I am right on that

anyways which dragon type (breed? idk seawing, Nightwing, mudwing, etc you literally know 100000x more than I do) do you think I would be and can I get a basic description of it? that'd be cool. also cool if you don't lol

I need to ask that hermit permit blog to do that that'd be cool.

like the ask would go "hi! can I have a permit that allows soul horizon!Cleo and Scott to brew potions? thanks!"

no but imagine. OH MY GOD

so bench trio (TommyInnit, Tubbo, and Ranboo, idk if you had a dsmp phase/hyperfixation/lifestyle/it doesn't fucking ever leave you) are Cleo's students. just imagine Tommy getting surgery for smth (let's say appendicitis because I dont wanna give him heart issues but anyways whatever) and then one day Cleo brings Scott to class and she's like "hi this is my husband we got married platonically we're soulmates"

and Tommy is literally exploding inside because what the fuck this guy has seen my inner organs

OH MY GOD NO I MADE THE "LITERALLY EXPLODING INSIDE" AFTER I DECIDED IT WAS APPENDICITIS AND I STILL DIDNT REALIZE THE IRONY LMAO NOO

anyways Scott isn't even a main character rip

he's barely fucking relevant to the main story rip

Lizzie is not 10 ft tall as Riptide but that would be funny as fuck. She does use Guise Magic (it's just magic but people wanted to call it something) (it's for disguises) to make her fairy wings look more webbed

Lizzie's a fairy fae. because fae is like a huge overarching creature that encompasses fuck all with pointed ears. (Scott is an elf fae, scar is a vex fae and an elf fae, idk who else)

Soulmates and not soulmates are both normal. it's pretty 50/50, except soulmates need two people, so it's actually more like 67/33

because it's around one non-soulmate person to each soulmate pair

which is not canon because we have seven soulmate pairs and four non-soulmate ppl in the Life series but whatever

THANK YOU FOR THE QUESTIONS PERIIIII

Psst Royal

Do you wanna rant about anymore soul horizon lore? I would like to hear about soul horizon lore if you wanna ramble :D

Also would you like to read the essay I wrote about llkau Pearl's psychological truama and manipulation from her mother?

yes I am always down to rant about soul horizon lore. also YES I WANT PEARLS PSYCHOLOGICAL TRAUMA HEHEHEHEHEHEH

Anyways hello. I am normal sized again wow.

Okay so personally--FUCK I HAVE A MEGA STUPID ASSIGNMENT IM GONNA NEED TO DEAL WITH THAT IN SOME AMOUNT OF TIME--i have recently been obsessed with soul horizon divorcée quartet.

THEYRE. SO FUCKING SPECIAL TO ME. BECAUSE THEYRE LOSERS

OMG OMG I NEED TO EXPLAIN THE EEP

WE DONT CARE ABOUT THE EEP WE CARE ABOUT SCOTT AND CLEO AND PEARL AND MARTYN

Scott and Cleo are canonically married. why did I do this, you may ask? tax benefits. and they were living with each other anyways. and also idk how marriage licenses work but it makes the pay a whole lot like even-er because Scott's a doctor and Cleo's a teacher

Well they're a college professor. idk how much more college professors get paid and I am too lazy to google it

hold on actually

ok so according to the first results: 96k to 300k per year which makes the second result so fucking sad like. the second result is 30k-97k a year. like. rip

compared to high school teachers: 45k-100k per year. Jesus Christ. and then the second result is 38k-46k.

rip teachers honestly

AYY SCOTT IS LOADED. I THINK. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH SHIT COSTS I HAVE NO LIFE EXPERIENCE I AM A BLOB FLOATING IN THE WIND DESPERATELY CLINGING TO LIFE

330k-630k. Yahoo. scott has it good. he's a surgeon because... I said so. he's like a surgeon but also a doctor. I think. mostly a surgeon tho but I am going to call him a doctor for the rest of this because in my mind he wears the coats. like a lab person. with cyan hair

SO. WHERE DO WE ACTUALLY BEGIN WITH THE LORE.

Well. It starts in elementary school. I... don't actually have lore for Cleo and Scott for this part but I do for Pearl and Martyn! So Pearl and Martyn are the same age, and they went to Evolution Elementary and Middle. They're in the same building. People just call it Evo

Also Jimmy barely made it through that school bc the year after he graduated it got shut down bc it was hosting cult activities. hmmm. weird

All the Evo gang went to Evo Elementary. shocker. And Lizzie.

And then they graduated, and they went to Hermit High Academy. Which I love. All the Hermits are there, except for Joel and Skizz (THEY WEREN'T HERMITS WHEN THIS STARTED AND ID ALREADY DONE THIS BACKSTORY), Cleo (she was at EEP), Gem, and Scar.

Also EEP stands for Empires Education Program. I love the EEP. All Empires people went there.

The two significant years-

hold on hold on hold on. okay. so.

Year order. we need this

also my sibling once told me that I text like someone with ADHD and I cannot help but feel like that's relevant here.

hello it is now a completely different day and place (I'm at the kitchen table and it is midnight)

(It has been thirty minutes I'm in my bed again and I am going to fall asleep. I need to take my meds. I have now taken my meds. now if I wanted to I could just fall asleep. I'm gonna keep talking here.)

In the Empires Education Program (which is referred to by people who want to mock it and also the attendees of it as the eep. Others say Empires or E E P (separated letters)) there are two years of people attending that we care about.

Everyone that was in Empires or SOS, minus False, Pearl, Jimmy, and Gem is part of the EEP.

The secondary year we care about (the grade below) has Oli, Owen, Mog, Eloise, and a few others unnamed (prolly from Witchcraft) because I refuse to make this class smaller than Magic School Bus's.

Everyone (minus Pearl, Jimmy, and Gem) in Empires S1 is in the first year of EEP. The second year has everyone else (minus False) that was in Empires S2 and SOS.

The primary year we care about (the most plot relevant people are here) has Scott, Cleo, Lizzie, Joel, Shelby, Katherine, fWhip, Pix, Sausage, and Joey. You might notice that Cleo is in here, and they are not part of this group. Cleo is in here because I said so. Also I needed a place for her to be besties with Scott. And Cleo would be a great addition to this crew, just saying.

... genuinely it is a completely different day and I am in a separate building and I have no idea what my ultimatum here was

Anyways. Martyn is a vigilante, Pearl's a villain, Scott's a doctor, and Cleo's a professor.

The funny thing that I'm absolutely in love with is how they semi get along. but mostly don't.

see. Scott and Pearl had that whole scene where Pearl literally ran out of magic and started ripping it out of Scott's soul. Magic is part of your soul, so it comes from a similar place as your soulbond.

And so Scott and Pearl have a well justified rivalry. And also after they broke the soulbond -- OH I JUST REMEMBERED THE REALLY FUNNY SHIT -- they both became Worthy, Scott significantly earlier than Pearl.

I still gotta explain the Worthy thing dammit

Anyways the really funny shit is that normally, when you reject your soulbond, you essentially function exactly the same as a person without a soulbond except you've got a weird tattoo, and you will die at the same moment that they do.

EXCEPT the divorce quartet are part of the Eighteen (which irl are just the life series members), and this means that the rejection doesn't work. It works at first, and Pearl and Scott have silent minds for the first time ever, and then they hear the slight whisper of the other one's voice and just. they're suffering.

It's funny as fuck, imo, because I'm the sadist author that makes the characters suffer. hehe

essentially, the telepathy hurts more after they rejected it than before. And also they also have the normal consequence of "if the one dies, then the other one dies too" which normal soulmates don't have.

But because of the rejection not working, the four of them realized that they're Winners. And they all figure out that they're Winners because Pearl believes that Mortality mythology (aka life series canon events) is real.

And Martyn was like "hah Pearl you're crazy"

and Pearl straight up goes "Jimmy's the Canary"

and the three of them stare at Pearl

because EVERYONE has heard the legend of the canary. It doesn't fucking matter who you are.

And Cleo's straight up like "holy shit"

And Scott knew the entire time bc he shares a brain with Pearl except he semi didn't believe it but he knew that Pearl believed it

But now they figure out that Scott is the Stars (2nd winner), Pearl is the Moon (3rd winner), Martyn is Mars/water/The Tower (4th winner), and Cleo is Pluto/fire/Death (6th winner).

And then perhaps Grian just walks out of the house and is like what're y'all talking about.

And then Pearl just stares at him. because she remembers what his soulmark is.

It's the sun and the earth. which is the missing duo of winners.

and Pearl is like. Grian. You're a winner.

and Grian's like "wtf are you on"

"like of mortality mythology"

"wat"

Scott: so is he the sun or the earth

Pearl: probably the sun. have you seen that face

Grian: wtf

Martyn: welcome to divorce club, Grian

Pearl: Martyn stfu

Martyn: yeah I'm scared of you so I will actually do that

Also Martyn and Pearl are besties

also I gotta write the scene where they divorce bc it's actually rly cute. not like Scott&Pearl and Martyn&Cleo but like. Scott and Martyn are cute. And Pearl and Cleo are cute. And Cleo and Scott<3 and Martyn and Pearl are like besties. so.

yeah

they. them. they're the perfect combination of like. a lot of shit. because all of them are morally gray.

hey that's almost my name

My name is actually a play on the phrase "morally gray", fun fact

Since Pearl is literally a villain. Martyn is a more hero aligned vigilante. Scott and Cleo, while being civilians, do actively help Pearl by giving her potions and shit since she and Martyn can go to the Nether to get the ingredients, and Scott and Cleo have a permit to brew potions.

Like. Scott and Cleo are like passive and will not get outed in the grand scheme, but technically they break the law daily. And I love them so much for that. Like. They know WAYYY too much to be civilians. Not even JOEL knows as much, and he's the motherfucking husband of Riptide, who is the sister of Scarlet AND Sparrow. AND the Canary.

Anyways. Um. If you want to ask any clarifying questions, I would be more than happy to answer those.

This was rly incoherent and I'm sorry abt that but y'know :D

THANK YOU PERI @periwinklepaint FOR THE ASK :D :D

[publicuniversalenemy]

vent/

[dirt-grub]

oh is it time to listen to bizarre love triangle and feel things? i guess it is

[in-amorem-cadete]

i do not believe i will stop having trust issues until i stop having to interact with men

[icannotgetoverbirds]

Again, stream of consciousness. Apparently I have a lot to say right now. Also, coffee and proper medicated-ness fuels creativity. Who knew?

Subsequent, Consequent, Content?

college costs much more than me more than it ever has in history at least i think, im never sure Probability's so rarely pure

the walls melt and it's okay i've still got so much to say little built-in tripping can't keep me from another rant

wanna learn and grow and bring new knowledge, ideas, everything but i can't brush my own damn teeth my capability's just beneath

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

I think it all started in grade five S’pposed to be easy enough, being alive At least then my needs were met Even if school was a losing bet

I tried and fought and nearly wiped on out Like some parasite, came the doubt If I can’t do this, I’ll never make it But i just can’t, i just can’t take it

It was supposed to get better then But apparently by year ten Neurotransmission machine is broken No wonder i’d wanted sleep unwoken

You didn’t take it too well, of course Mr. I’m healthy as a horse Hey man, horses are real fucked up I think you just got broke shit and luck (yup)

My rock stayed stable back then Despite everything and even when ...Eeeeh, y’know? Of course, who doesn’t? Kids these days got a dime a dozen*

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

The world is ending, ours and mine And i keep stepping out of line How i manage that when i can’t walk What i'm told and what i talk

Well that’s all beyond me, i guess I’ve always just done my best Hate to say it’s insufficient I’m trying to be more efficient

So now I’m out and on my own, Some call me baby, some call me grown I got dreams either way Given my needs, who’s to say

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

I’m tired, man, aren’t we all Everybody’s behind the ball Or in front, about to be rolled over Better hope you don’t get pulled over

God can’t help us, your god won’t And don’t act like he will, just plain don’t It’s our fucking job to fix this shit And I can’t believe someone had to say it

Quit waiting around for god to listen Quit waiting around for heaven’s glisten You worship death with unproven afterlife And don’t bother trying to make better this life

Jesus fuck, good lord, oh god, And whatever else to not nod Along to that monster’s preachers We’re people, man. We’re just creatures.

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

Entitled generation, let’s go with that I don’t mind wearing that tired hat Just know we know what we deserve Y’all ain’t once protect and serve

At least we’re kind to the ones that serve us At least we know the value of service At least we ask for our money’s worth You know, what you’ve had, like, since birth?

I’m sick and tired of right-wing asshats Nazi salutes and red slogan maga hats History is repeating, you’re failing the test It’s open, note, my guy, is this really your best?

And yeah, some people are a little soft Aren’t you, too, up in your loft? Going on about how much it peeves you, endless That people exist, till you’ve left yourself breathless

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

The kids before us, they had hopes But you never bothered to show them the ropes Now we see what’s really occurring The world’s collapsing, we’ve been inferring

Every little girl wants to be a princess Then I realized I’d have to settle for less Vet seemed too far off in addition I didn’t have the money, despite my volition

So writer, then editor, then anything at all So long as it pays, I’ll answer the call My dreams seemed excessive, I needed to be alive How are you supposed to do anything but survive

Of course, even then, it couldn’t be that easy The wind’s picking up, it’s getting pretty breezy My body, my mind, my heart, my soul Keep acting up, despite the pull

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

So now, here we are, hopeless and helpless Unless you get off of your ass and start to help us** You made this mess, you need to help clean it It’s no way to live, knee-high in bullshit

The people that need to hear this just won’t They totally could if they chose, they don’t I should know, it’s the way I used to be I look at them, I see a past version of me

Listen, I’ve been there, done that song and dance But damn it, for once, will you try to take a chance? Listen to something that isn’t Fox or trump Pull your head out of your own fucking rump

I think what I have should be good enough I think I’m tired of being tough I think everyone deserves better than this I think monsoon season was wetter than this

~~

*this is not a dig at 'kids these days'

**the you is directed at the people who made this mess in the first place and the people who have the means to but do not change things for the better. people who care but feel too trapped to do something are okay, and people who are doing literally anything at all? lightspeed, soldiers. lightspeed.

**Edit: the first you is actually directed at my piece of shit father, the you's from the double asterisks on is as previously stated. deadass forgot there was another you in there lmao

it takes a village

tbh this could be put to music, if someone wants to then maybe I'll sing it, but apparently im not half-bad at writing songs so like ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Wildfire

the dragon beast burned our shit i grabbed on and didn't let go you and me, we fought against it until it was no more

and oh we were so tired exhausted, wiped out, just done and i think about how im wired wasn't this supposed to be fun?

so tell me, my dear love why oh why is it happening again raining from the maw above and what did we do then?

I said, well maybe, it's time for a burn Maybe there's a better way, maybe we need to learn You said 'you're on your own, kid, and this is your fault, so" hum idk

Chorus:

Get it together, man Get outta this house Pull your head from the sand Practice what you espouse

Maybe you need some help Ain't that what family is for Too bad they won't scruff this whelp Cause they're just too damn poor

End chorus

So you worked and worked and worked and I rested i guess way too much "Dontcha know god's labor's never shirked? You should be doing as such"

Beholden to no god except each other Beholden to the safety of my mother What do you do when home's not home What do you do when you're alone?

Chorus:

Get it together, man Get outta this house Pull your head from the sand See what you espouse

Maybe you need some help Ain't that what family is for Too bad they won't carry this whelp Cause they're just too damn poor

End chorus

So home was a house again Never to return, I hope I went through some real shit then God, what a tired trope

Traffic's no place to play, you know Better than that sad place, though I saw the mountains, close enough To walk up to them, sure it'd be tough

bridge:

It'd be worth it It's all been worth it This world wants me dead the people want me alive it's just like i said i can't work a nine to five (right now i hate being right)

new chorus:

I got something going, man I'm outta house My head's a bit fogged and well, at least there's no louse

I'm getting some good help Aint that what family is for The world's gotta carry this old whelp Now that he's damn poor

end chorus and song(?)

anyways maybe i could add more to the end of it but it already feels pretty long. could also do some editing in general but here y'all go lmao