#im petty as fuck so i would never forgive person d if that was me actually

[j-crow]

chat. are we fucking serious. 😭😭

stalking peoples blogs is soooo entertaining

[caracalfeather]

WARNING- Cats and Birds is a mob AU fanfiction of the Arcana game, and is not meant for young audiences and is not meant to offend anyone. Some writing choices were made so characters are out of their canon way of acting and thinking. Please do not be offended by character choices made by the authors and content creators, this story was made for fun and in the way we wanted it to be. The story was not hijacked by any of the authors to make any ships or characters overshadow any other. All content contained in this story has been agreed upon and accepted by all parties in it’s creation.

TW- Cats and Birds contains scenes that may not be suitable with some readers, including themes of violence, smoking/drug use, sex, cursing and various other strong themes. Special warnings for scenes will be posted with chapters. Proceed with caution and Reader’s discretion is advised.

9

The next morning, Rose shivered against ilya, waking up to a cold room. She wrapped herself in the blanket.

Julian stirred awake, he just laid there and didn’t bother to move, the barking had stopped sometime in the night so Julian wasn’t completely sleepless.

Morning darling.” Rose purred and kissed his neck, smiling “You were rough last night.”

“Hmmmm….you think?” He sighed, caressing her face.

“It was good. But that nickname wasnt your best idea. It was cute though.” She sighed

Julian blushed and hid underneath his pillow. Damn her. “Why can’t you just leave me alone?!??” He groaned into his mattress, her haunting was becoming increasingly annoying as long as that goddamned photo wasn’t burned to ash.

“D-did i do something again?” she looked at him, her smile dropping from her face.

Julian sat up in a hurry and cupped Rose’s face. “No! No darling! It’s not you! God it could never be you.” He sighed, “I think I’m being haunted is all.”

“.......” She looked at him, skeptical and stood up “Im...going to shower…” She picked up her clothes and mumbled.

With rage boiling in his blood Julian dug through the waste basket and tore the photo up. “Good riddance to you, you're ruining everything!” He shouted, the pieces fluttering to the floor. He tore the photo in a few big chunks but Julian was more disappointed in himself more than anyone.

As Rose showered, Plume was downstairs making plans for Rose's next trip heist. It would be a little longer than her last.

Julian was on torture that morning, he slipped on his black gloves, and faced the cell. His mind was not in the right place but a job had to be done.

“Alright. Our queen is heading out for a month or two to chicago. She’s going on a supply run and needs a companion.” Plume set down the map of the route as a few guys volunteered. Meanwhile, Rose was toweling off and packing her bags, mumbling to herself and trying to think if she’d done something to upset ilya. She hurt on the inside and wished she could just disappear into her bed.

He opened the cell and was met by two brown eyes. The woman who was handcuffed was big and she looked….really familiar.

The woman looked up, “look….if you’re here to torture me I already told the big fella that it was all a misunderstanding-“ her eyes flashed and she laughed. “Noooooo…..yes? It can’t be???”

Julian looked into the eyes of...Bèatrice.

“Bèa….what the hell are you doing here?” Julian growled.

Bea spat blood into the concrete. “I could say the same to you, you son of a bitch. We all thought you DIED.”

Julian could not handle this today, he rubbed his temples, “but that’s not why you're here.”

“Right…..I’m here because I was looking for Madeve your dog.” She explained, “he’s been getting out a lot recently and I’ve been helping get him home.”

He nodded and Bèa continued.

“What would she say if she knew you were here? Would she ever forgive you-“

Her words were cut short by a bullet to the head. Julian held the gun with shaking hands and stepped out from the cell. He was probably going to get a scolding from Plume, but it was worth not having to deal with this matter anymore.

Plume looked up from the map at the sound and growled “Damn it. Alright everyone, prep the queen and get ilya.”

Like clockwork Ilya was dragged to Plume. Julian with a blood splattered face was so done with everything and everyone.

“Who the fuck did you kill now you usesless dog?” Plume hissed, tossing the map into a bag and glaring at him.

“A trespasser.” Julian hissed crossing his arms over his chest.

“Whatever. Rose is leaving for a few months.” He pushed Julian into a chair “We’re getting her things ready.”

“I take it, I'm going with her.” He sighed, “I am pretty sure I’m the last person she wants to see currently.”

“It's up to you. She’s getting her clothes from your room right now.” He mumbled. Upstairs, rose was bending down to grab her shirt, pausing as she noticed torn pieces of paper on the floor. Carefully she looked at them, her heart sinking slightly as she saw a beautiful face she’d only seen in magazines. Her mind began to wander as she put the paper in her pocket. What was he doing with her torn picture? Was it an infatuation? Maybe it was just remnants of an old magazine…

Julian found Rose in his room. He smiled, wiping some stray blood from his cheek. “Well, I took care of the trespasser.”

“Huh? Oh...thanks.” Rose put her jacket on and fixed her hair, unimpressed.

“Did I piss you off again?” Julian frowned, “Rose, this is becoming a pattern and I would like for it not too.”

“No, I'm just busy and sore...sorry.” She sighed, going to the door, the ripped pieces in her pocket.

Julian sighed and began packing himself, meeting Rose out in the garage when he was done. “So we’re going all the way across the country. For supplies. “

“We? You're coming with me?” She put her bags in the back as plume nodded “Yes. and You two are fetching more artillery from our Chicago pride since we can't ship them anymore.”

“Perfect.” He smiled, tossing his bag in along with Rose’s. “Are we going in disguise this time?” His smile widened into a mischievous grin.

“Yep. Once you're in the city rose will be dressed as Mistress thorne and you” Plume tossed lingerie looking close at him “Will be her collared sub Thomas.” Plume laughed “No one questions the mistress.” It was a joke, but he didn't doubt ilya would play the part anyway.

Julian laughed, “ha! Good thing it’s a long drive it will give me plenty of time to get into character.”

“You'll keep your mouth shut.” Rose mumbled and got into the driver's seat.

“As my Mistress commands.” Julian bowed dramatically and got into the car.

Blasting music, rose took off to the highway, opening the window as they began the trip.

“The city seems strangely quiet today.” Julian sighed staring out the window, “we haven’t gone on a long trip together in a very long time.”

“Yeah… almost a year now.” she mumbled and glanced at him “New york last time.”

Julian chuckled, “That’s Right! That mission was an absolute disaster….but it was fun. And you had fun fucking me into oblivion.”

“Mhm. next time i'll gag and peg you with a strap.” She weaved her way through the streets, listening to an old rock song.

He unbuttoned his shirt slightly, his charismatic smirk on full display. “Just hearing you say that makes me hungry and excited.” He traced a gentle line from her cheek down her neck.

She slapped his hand away and huffed “I'm not touching you until we get to chicago.” Her voice growled “Then I'm going to make sure you submit and learn your place.”

Julian held up his hands in full surrender, shutting up. He instead brought his attention to the passing streets.

The ride was a long 10 hours until they finally stopped at an inn. It was pitch black outside as they got a room, Rose spent another hour nursing a blunt on the balcony. Her mind was full of memories of old lovers. Each had ended up leaving her for Hollywood models and performers, saying they were better than her. They had called her an alley cat, a mangy stray. And after finding that picture, rose was sure ilya was fantasizing about being with a performer. Someone prettier and more talented. She finished smoking and dropped her head, looking at old scars on her arms.

Julian wrapped his arms around her and hummed into her neck. “Someone is in the pits of despair” he chuckled, “ I thought I was going to get punished once we arrived.”

“In chicago. You have 15 more hours.” She looked at him “Cant a girl smoke in the night in peace?” She looked at the dark night.

He let her go, “alright I get it. You're upset I’ll leave you be.” He retreated back into the room. Mulling over what he did this time. Each answer leading to the one thing he had been fighting these past 2 weeks.

“It doesn't feel good, does it?” She whispered and looked at the moon “Gods, my papi would kill me for being this petty.”

Julian heavily sighed, “you think I haven’t been suffering? Your suffering makes me suffer! And aside from that, I’m still just suffering.”

Rose went into the bathroom to shower, sitting on the tiles as warm water hit her back. She got lost in thought, a few tears mixing with the water.

Julian flopped back on the bed. Rubbing his eyes in frustration. He wished that bullet had killed him, it would spare a lot of feelings and memories that were now causing issues.

Rose came back to the bed, laying down with her back to ilya, browsing her phone quietly and yawning.

He looked over at her, “I’m sorry.” He muttered.

“For what?” She mumbled, setting down her phone on the nightstand.

“For everything.” He sighed, “I’m sorry I stumbled upon your branch in Spain, I’m sorry you had to save me while I was bleeding out. I’m sorry I have made life so much worse for you. Rose I love you, but there are things that….haunt me. They have come back and it has affected our relationship, and I’m sorry!!! So so sorry!!”

“....Believe it or not… You're the best thing that's happened to me ilya.” She mumbled, looking at the wall “And i know there's shit that both of us deal with…. But i don't regret saving you. Or falling in love.”

Julian shook his head, “what if I regret being saved?”

“NO.” she sat up and glared at him “You shut the fuck up right now ilya. Don't ever say that.”

“...I CAN’T HELP IT ROSE!” He shouted sitting up. “I have been suppressing so much pain!”

“THEN WHY CAN'T YOU JUST LET IT OUT?! IF NOT TO ME THEN TO SOMEONE OR SOMETHING ELSE?!” She got out of bed, her eyes stinging as she went and locked herself in the bathroom.

Julian punched the wall and fell back into the bed. Rubbing his eyes, he tore his eye patch off and rubbed his bad eye. Trying to prevent everything from coming out.

[snufflesmajor]

‘RULES: tag ten followers you want to know better!

TAGGED BY: nicked it from @misplacedheroics TAGGING: im not, but i am putting it under a readmore since it’s ooc

NAME: elle (tumblr) and i have!! recently!!! acquired a nickname!!!!! FINALLY STAR SIGN: libra HEIGHT: 5′3″ WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME? it’s a Queens name c: (no relation)

PUT YOUR ITUNES ON SHUFFLE. WHAT ARE THE FIRST 6 SONGS THAT POPPED UP?

How about Spotify instead?.

The Heavy - Be Mine

The Beatles - Back in the USSR

The Hives- A.K.A I-D-I-O-T

Palma Violets - Secrets of America

Buzzcocks - Friends of Mine

GRAB THE BOOK NEAREST YOU AND TURN TO PAGE 23. WHAT’S LINE 17?

“with keen creatures of idiom” e e cummings complete poems  1904 - 1962

EVER HAD A POEM OR SONG WRITTEN ABOUT YOU? not that i’ve been privy to (but probably; i was friends with a lot of musos when i was a teenager and we were always being stupid)

WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU PLAYED AIR GUITAR? 07:50ish this morning. bass was around six hours ago 

WHO IS YOUR CELEBRITY CRUSH? i really don’t think i have one? i have muses (like actual muses, not rp muses), or, well one, but that’s not really a crush, is it?

WHAT’S A SOUND YOU HATE; SOUND YOU LOVE?

HATE: nails scratching against material

LOVE: that weird sound a person makes when they smile and their lips pull apart. it’s really nice when it’s quiet and dark.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN GHOSTS? i want to so badly HOW ABOUT ALIENS? u think it would be wrong not to believe in them. they’ve never given any indication that they might fail? so far, they’ve earnt my faith in their abilities.

DO YOU DRIVE? NO BUT I’M ABOUT TO GET A MOTORBIKE DOES THAT COUNT  IF SO, HAVE YOU EVER CRASHED? i’ve never crashed a car (bc i don’t drive a car) but i did drop a bike so

WHAT WAS THE LAST BOOK YOU READ? uhh..... ??? definitely one with words.

DO YOU LIKE THE SMELL OF GASOLINE? yes

WHAT WAS THE LAST MOVIE YOU SAW? rhps?

WHAT’S THE WORST INJURY YOU’VE EVER HAD? I’M ACTUALLY REALLY LUCKY? I have a four leaf clover birthamark on my arse. Or close to my arse. The point is, I’m stupidly lucky, so I usually narrowly miss heinous injuries.

DO YOU HAVE ANY OBSESSIONS RIGHT NOW? writing wolfstar and wolfstar related things i guess. it isn’t really an obsession though, so... maybe the bike stuff? or there’s one thing i obsess about but it’s lowkey (read: highkey) embarrassing. idk why i’m mentioning it here? that sounds so vague. okay, i’ll tell you what it is and you’ll have to believe me since you’ve no other proof: i met a walrus and we’ve planned to spend the evening together, but her husband might be home at any moment so i’ve been pouring over maps for escape glaciers.

...where do walruses live?

omg i was right they live near the ice.

The walrus (Odobenus rosmarus) is a large flippered marine mammal with a discontinuous distribution about the North Pole in the Arctic Ocean and subarctic seas of the Northern Hemisphere.

okay cool but while we’re on the topic:

im so happy we’re goinng on this journey together.

that isn’t fun that’s ???

OH HOLY SHIT

WHERE ARE THE OTHERS

the Pacific walrus(O. r. divergens) which lives in the Pacific Ocean, and O. r. laptevi, which lives in the Laptev Sea of the Arctic Ocean.

oooohhhhh

DO YOU TEND TO HOLD GRUDGES AGAINST PEOPLE WHO HAVE DONE YOU WRONG?

Not really? i usually forgive and mostly forget, but i do remember some things for years and continue to be petty + salty over them. but they’re for the most ridiculous things? idk why but wow i #remember. but for the most part, i really don’t care. if other people want to shoot themselves in the foot by being fucking ridiculous, go ahead? i feel bad that they have to wake up every morning and be that kind of person, but that’s not something i’m going to take onto myself by holding a grudge. if we’re done, you’re out of my head forever, too.

IN A RELATIONSHIP? no

[tayegi]

I relate to the OC so much! A few years ago, one of my closest friends did something similar to me. So now I'm crying. But I love New Rules so freakin' much, you don't even know!

Anonymous said:What happened in the last chapt. really resounded w/ me. Related to Mijoo bc I once did something similar to a friend of mine back in high school- she liked a guy who I was sort of friends with, and she wanted me to put in a good word and all, but I ended up crushing on and hooking up w/ him and even now I feel like shit when I think about it. Like the OC, she was the bigger person and forgave me but I'd have understood if she didn't, bc even though it was just a crush, I broke her trust in me.

Anonymous said:Maybe because I've had a whole lifetime worth of Mijoo's I just can't find it in my heart to hate her. It's fucked up what she did, but people fuck up and let emotions run their lives. Y'all need to chill tho.

Anonymous said:If someone would do something like that to me I’d go full on bitch mode and ruin her life no matter how innocent, sweet, petty bla bla I’d ruin her life especially since it actually once happened to me and just like her I didn’t do anything about it because I was to nice back than but now that I went trough shit I know not to let people treat me as they’d do// hope she grows stronger in the future chapters 💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼💪🏼

queen-bee222 said:Im sorry but i dont like Mijoo. I've encountered so many girls like her and they have always fucked me over😠😠😩

Anonymous said:Hi Lu, thank you so much for the new chapter of New Rules. I wanted to say that I love how you create the OC's personality in a way that relates to many people. I actually cried when I was reading this chapter because the friendship between the OC and Mijoo is painfully similar to my friendship with my best friend. People think I'm this self-confident, sarcastic, heartless person but it's all just a facade. I'm terrified of people learning how paranoid and insecure I feel. I'm a brick in

Anonymous said:comparison to my friend. She's pretty, popular, confident and lovable. We're labeled best friends, but sometimes she turns her back to me like I'm nothing... To treasure someone so much only for them to hurt you in the end is heartbreaking. But no matter how much she hurt or angered me, I could never have the heart to hurt her. We're not the perfect friends I thought we were. Thank you so much for opening my eyes about her and myself.

thirsty99girl

submitted:

I just read chap 2 of new rule!!! And I almost cried!!! Because I can relate and feel how the oc feels!!! this story really reminds me of what happened to me in the past with my ex best friend!! We both had crush on the same guy and I didn’t know at first she even liked him then being the snake she is, she talked tons of shit about me in front of my crush and then coming to me lying through her teeth saying my crush told her that he liked her and then she caused so much drama for me that I won’t even talk about till it led me and my crush to the point we stopped talking to each other over an argument that she caused by lying and I could’ve expose her ass and make her ashamed of what she did but I just decided to hold everything back in my chest & forgive her, I give up on him even tho I still like him a lot and seeing him is a suffer for me… I don’t talk to my best friend anymore not because of him, because she did so many other things to me and later saying that she’s sorry and pretending to be the most innocent girl on earth!! I was tired of this… ughh I’m sorry idek why I talked about this I just felt like letting it out 😪

Anonymous said:Holy crap, the new chapter for New Rules stings like a bitch. A similar situation happened to me with my friend and this guy I liked. I told my friend that I liked the guy, and she told him soon after, which I wasn't really angry about. I remember feeling so lost when he knew my feelings and I didn't know his. I would talk to her about it and she would tell me that maybe we just weren't meant to be. I didn't find out until a couple years later when he said

Anonymous said:"Yeah, remember when we liked each other?" in one of our conversations, that I found out that he told her to tell me that he reciprocated my feelings. She never told me until I told her about my conversation with him. She said she liked him too and that it would've been hard for her to see him happy with someone who wasn't her. This is where I really connect with the oc's thoughts. How could you put a relationship over a friendship like that? I found it so selfish.

Anonymous said:I think the most difficult part of a situation like that is thinking what could've been. Maybe we would've made the best couple ever. Maybe we would've gotten married or had kids on the future. You just can't know. It hurts like a bitch, and you're just left clueless. Anyway, amazing chapter as always! I can't wait to read more once you have time to grace us with your beautiful words once again 💘

Anonymous said:Can you believe that I relate too much to the OC? A very close friend did something similar to me a few years ago in high school. So here I am, crying. But I loved this chapter sooooo much.

Anonymous said:This chapter hurt me a lot. Cuz I feel like I do so much more for my friends and then they ditch me right when they get into a relationship. It hurts even more when it's a good guy. I've never had a guy genuinely like me for my personality, just for my body. It makes me wonder if anyone would even like me for me, but that notion hasn't been proven yet so. :/ I'm kind of tired of feeling compelled to put other people first, though that's just who I am guess.

Anonymous said:1- WHY DO I IDENTIFY SO MUCH WITH THE OC OF NEW RULES? lemme tell you this...I was bffs with a girl for years, she always tried to be with the guys me and my friends were with, she even fucked the guy who I had my first time with and told me ON MY BIRTHDAY PARTY. The thing is I let so many fucked up things slide only because I thought our friendship meant more than some guys, until I realized she didn't care about me feeling bad because of her actions, she cared more about fucking a dude than

Anonymous said:2- our friendship. I wonder what will it take for the oc to snap, she may try to forgive mijoo, but when you just forgive someone that easily, they don't learn their lesson, they will do it again and again because they know they can do it because you will forgive them at the end. I hope Mijoo isn't the case but Idk... thank you for writing something real as New Rules, really makes you think about things.

Anonymous said:When I got the notification that you'd updated New Rules I swear I've never clicked a notification so fast asjdkakck No but real talk when I finished reading I was genuinely convinced that me and the OC were the same person, I hate how I relate to this story but it's so good!! Teared up towards the end bcus feels ;-; Thank you for creating such wonderful writing, my non-existent soul is blessed (and so are you) ^ - ^

Anonymous said:I am literally on the brink of tears, Lu. I feel like a lot of girls can in some way relate, because at some point, we were all immature little babies who had no idea how to handle ourselves or relationships, so we just flew by the seat of our pants. The way the OC feels and what happened with her and Jimin and Mijoo reminds me of a similar situation that I was in, and for you to capture those feelings so nicely was a punch in the gut.

Ah, Im reading through all of your asks and my heart is breaking for all of you guys :( im legit tearing up here knowing that so many of you can relate and that you’ve gone through such similar experiences. I hope that you have those toxic ppl out of your lives and that you’re all doing well now. I love you all D: 

[eriquebittle]

You should do holsom for that 31 questions thing like do all of them

here we fucking go,

1. Who in your OTP is the serial butt-slapper and who is constantly getting their beautiful butt slapped?

theyre equal opportunity bros...if ur bf gets a killer shot at beer pong or aces his chem exam you have to slap his butt it's the Bro Code

2. Who wants to be immortal and who wants to die before they’re old?

they had a conversation about this at 2am and they both decided that they would pick the same option ("i never wanna live without you bro" "BRO") however, holster has tried to get his poptart out of the toaster with a fork three different times so dying young seems likely

3. Who smokes and who pulls the cigarette from between their lips every time they try to light one?

i mean they're college athletes so neither of them smoke but i bet holster tried it once freshman year and ransom had to run back to his dorm to find his inhaler

4. Who always has cold hands and who is always warming them up for them?

ransom's hands are freezing and holster breathes on em and gives them kisses 2 keep them warm

5. Who plays candy crush in important meetings and who elbows them in the ribs to make them pay attention?

when they have a lecture together they just snapchat each other uglie badly-angled selfies

6. Who can fall asleep anywhere (and does) and who has to put them to bed?

ransom is forced to survive on three hours of sleep during finals so he passes out mid-conversation and holster sets an alarm and rolls him into bed so they can nap together

7. Who is the genius procrastinator who wings every test but still comes away with straight As, and who takes preparation and conscientious work very seriously?

justin "4.0 but never goes to class" oluransi, a beautiful coral reef, is a strange combination of both, holster has seen his textbooks maybe twice this semester and manages B's

8. Who takes their coffee black and who likes it with milk and two sugars, getting called a pussy by Person A?

ransom gets his with like six sugars and holster has been drinking black coffee since he was 6

9. Who initially seems shady but turns out to be a cinnamon bun, and who initially seems like a cinnamon bun but turns out to be shady?

not so much "shady" as douchey? initally they come off looking like the "you kno i had to do it to em" guy but theyre just two Bros....in love....who don't know how to be quiet in the library

10.  Who moans and talks with their mouth full whenever they eat good food, and who tells them to stfu but can’t help laughing?

do i even need 2 say it,

11.Who gives the bear hugs and who is always sidling up to them and snaking their arms around their waist?

ransom gives the Best Hugs and holster is a fucking giant who loves sneaking up behind his bf and resting his head on his shoulder and giving him. a smooch

12. Who still buys juice boxes and fruit snacks to put in their lunch?

whenever they go to stop & shop they stock the fuck up on gushers and capri suns “bro. as a future doctor? this is not how two college athletes should be fueling our bodies. fuck it throw in a few more boxes of gushers”

13. Who packs the other’s lunch and who repays them in sexual favours?

ransom has an 8am lab and forgets to bring food, and holster is happy 2 oblige to bring him his granola bar after ransom punctuates his text asking for lunch with a bunch of eggplant emojis

14. Who leaves notes in the other’s lunch and who tells them they’re dumb (but secretly has a collection of every note Person A has ever written them)?

holster leaves notes in ransoms bag a lot when he knows he’s getting really stressed out, and ransom keeps them in a shoebox under his bed and reads them when he needs to calm down

15. Who unconsciously holds their breath the first time they kiss, and who pulls back and says, “Breathe…”?

ransom holds his breath because holy fuck? hes about to make out with his best bro? and theyre sober this time? and whatififuckitupandourdmanmagicisgoneforeverandwenevermaekeitpastthefirstroundeveragainohmygodijustruinedsamwellmenshockeyforever and holster is like “breathe. can we just make out now please”

16. Who gets arrested for a petty crime they committed by accident and who bails them out?

holster gets arrested for jumping into the fountain at the mall on a dare, ransom bails him out 

17. Who grabs the other’s hand just as they’re getting out of bed and pulls them back under for cuddles?

ransom has early classes and holster grabs him and rolls over on him so he’s trapped under a 200 lb d man who just wants to spoon a little bit longer

18. Who gets mad about something unrelated to Person B and punches the wall, and who patches it up and kisses it better?

holster trips over his desk chair and accidentally puts his fist through the wall, Doctor Justin kisses it until the throbbing is gone

“is this gonna affect my handjob game, doctor?”

19. Who has the plain black phone case and who ordered one with cat ears off ebay?

ransom has a black one that he coated in stickers, holster bought the cat ear one by mistake but just decided to own it

20. Who likes to drive with the music blaring and who is too shy to sing along?

holster has a 500 song driving playlist that includes every banger in the discography of one direction, and neither of them are shy about singing along at maximum volume

21. Who’s the fantastic kisser and who has the beautiful eyes?

they both insist that the other one has both and get into fights over whose eyes are prettier and who kisses better

22. Who has the sunshine smile and who has the seductive gaze?

ransom defo has that killer smile, but holster has a resting bitch face and when he tries to look Seductive he looks tired and mad hfdjfhwhgfwb

23. Who gets offended by the intensity of the other’s crush on a celebrity?

UMMMMM justin “ransom” oluransi mashkov is in love with tater and holster has learned to accept that if given the chance, ransom would leave him for tater in 0.000007 seconds

“babe would you really leave me for mashkov”

“you know i would but ill always remember you”

“ ;___;”

dex: “can you guys not do this in the facebook group chat”

24. Who is embarrassed that they have to wear glasses sometimes and who wants them to wear them in bed?

ransom has a slight stigmatism but he mostly wears contacts, holster falls asleep in his glasses and when ransom tells him to take them off during sex holsters like “but how else am i gonna see your beautiful face bro”

25. Who cheats on the other then immediately begs for their forgiveness?

“you do this every fucking time and im tired of it”

“justin im so fucking sorry ill never do it again i promise”

“no im done playing monopoly with you dude you sneak extra money into your pile every time im sick of it”

26. Who is the jealous one and asks why the other was being so flirty all night, and who is oblivious to their own charms?

everyone has a crush on ransom and he doesnt see it, holster has the worst fucking game in history but he loves his boyfriends personality and every relationship needs to be built on trust, bro

27. Who orders a milkshake with their food and who orders a soda?

holster orders a milkshake for the sole purpose of asking ransom if its gonna bring all the boys to the yard

28. Who runs their battery down to 1% and who feels the need to charge theirs at 80%?

ransom takes care of his phone like its his child, holster hasnt seen a charger in three days and keeps the brightness up to 10000 so its constantly dead

29. Who has the excellent singing voice and is always singing around the house (and for Person B), but has no interest in going professional?

holster regularly belts out les mis aroud the haus, ransom joins him occasionaly but leaves most of it to adam 

30. Who would rather be barefoot if the setting is appropriate, and who has the huge and spectacular shoe collection (possibly also socks)?

when holster is anywhere he considers himself comfortable his feet are BARE, ransom has a sock collection a la spencer from icarly

31. Who takes their liquor on the rocks and who likes it neat?

holster orders on the rocks so he can chew on the ice with his massive horse teeth, ransom orders it neat but 99% of the time theyre drinking its at a kegster so they mainly just drink tub juice and natty light. classy

[kyohiba]

Xue Yang’s 420 Punishing Reincarnations AU

REINCARNATION AU

but who is he if he doesnt ruin it all tho

ssyifpfff🌙 OH YES

35m 34 minutes ago yeeting patriarch he ruins some stuff but not on the Did Everything Wrong & Ruined Everything level like he did

he could reincarnate n still find song lan bc hes..... basically immortal now

ssyifpfff🌙 n he helps heal xxcs n a-qins soul

34m 33 minutes ago yeeting patriarch like? mass murder of a sect over his pinky? Ok. using the goodness of xiao xingchen and breaking his soul beyond repair?? Too Much

ssyifpfff🌙 yea tht sect was full of dicks tbh but xxc was Angel

33m 33 minutes ago YES

what about xue yang paying off with some reincarnations

with each of them, he learns something

yeeting patriarch and pays for what he did and starts to Realize

ssyifpfff🌙 SLOW BURN CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT ASDFGHJK

32m 31 minutes ago yeeting patriarch in all those reincarnations, he meets painful ends

ssyifpfff🌙 in one of them he goes blind

32m 31 minutes ago but each makes him Learn And Pay

HOLD UP

and then, in the one where he manages to help song lan with the souls of xxc and a-qing

his next one, where the three meet again song lan

HES BLIND

hes still pretty much a petty grudge holding chaotic bastard little shit but with no murder or scheming

but his pay offs didnt end

yeeting patriarch with xxc and a-qing back, he still gotta pay off for what he did

ssyifpfff🌙 once he helps rebuild their souls they should b able to reincarnate too, n they can find each other u___u

29m 28 minutes ago xue yang: *reincarnates again* ayyy wassup song lan song lan: song lan: There We Go Again

wait i think people shouldn't have their past life memories right

yeeting patriarch BUT XUE YANG GETS THEM AS A PART OF HIS PUNISHMENT !?

xue yang in every reincarnation: ah shit here we go again

YES HE NEEDS TO AS PUNISHMENT

WHO PUNISHES HIM??? WE DO

ssyifpfff🌙 GET FUCKED XUE YANG LMAO

26m 25 minutes ago IFENSKSITNESOZFWJKSHS

yeeting patriarch xue yang we love u but u DESERVE

BITCHES GET STITCHES

in one of his reincarnations he trusts some1 n they betray him by killing him

in another one he is born into a loving family but they all get murdered

ssyifpfff🌙 dam thts a lot of years of damage if hes gonna rmmbr them all lmao

23m 22 minutes ago ssyifpfff🌙

22m 21 minutes ago IGEBEKIDTVEKSOZGBSLSUGWKS

It's What He Deserves

it's all for him to Learn

yeeting patriarch learn to accept his punishment, learn about the wrongdoings he did...

ssyifpfff🌙 learn to love back u_u and to accept kindness

20m 19 minutes ago learn to forgive n move on

"i have nvr in my life yelled at a girl like this. whn my mama yell at me its bc she love me. i was rooting for u we were all rooting for u hOW D

ssyifpfff🌙 LEARN FROM THIS"

19m 18 minutes ago the reincarnation he finally meets xiao xingchen again and a-qing he holds grudges like a normal person. and it's just ur average tsundere

yeeting patriarch we cannot wipe out completely the chaotic bastard essence he has

ssyifpfff🌙 DO THEY RECOGNIZE HIM???

18m 17 minutes ago OH MY GOD

yeeting patriarch DO THEY

mayb its like those AUs where they DONT exactly but

they Know theres some1 in there they met once

theres a familiarity

ssyifpfff🌙 he Knows its them tho

17m 16 minutes ago yeeting patriarch it would be Too Cruel for xiao xingchen to remember him...

TRUUUU

GASP Maybe to help xxc n a-qins soul he has to give up his own

ssyifpfff🌙 i mean, give his life

16m 15 minutes ago so they only get that Familiarity Vibe

maybe some fragmented dreams

yeeting patriarch FUKC

ssyifpfff🌙 YESSSS DREAMS

15m 15 minutes ago then, after he gives his own life to help xxc and a-qings souls

the next reincarnation

where the three are all born again

yeeting patriarch he Finally doesnt remember all his past lives

THEY JUST FEEL FAMILIAR TO EACH OTHER

ssyifpfff🌙 Y A S

14m 7 minutes ago there is still stuff for him to go through

he finally paid off most of his punishment

yeeting patriarch THE STRINGS OF FATE BRING THEM TOGETHER

ssyifpfff🌙 oooOOOOOOOH

13m 6 minutes ago yeeting patriarch im so sorry for song lan tho boi deserves his Rest & Fresh New Reincarnation too :(

maybe this time he has to Work to be loved. whn he met xxc he was just accepted w/o question. this time he needs to earn love

yea............. idk how it would work w a fierce corpse

guess he would have to Perish first

oH MAYBE

bc theres 2 souls to heal (xxc and a-qin) there needs to be 2 sacrifices

ssyifpfff🌙 thus song lan needs to Perish n then he can re enter the reincarnation circle

11m 4 minutes ago yeeting patriarch I NEED TO COPY, PASTE & EDIT THIS WHOLE CONVO. WE CANNOT LET THIS AU BE LOST IN OUR DMS

DO IT NYARI SAFE GUARD IT

ssyifpfff🌙 N USE IT TO CONVERT PPL INTO XUE YANG CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT AU

9m 2 minutes ago WE ARE AT IT AGAIN BEING DOGS

GODS******

yeeting patriarch quite literally being gods and doing what we want with the characters fates

DOGS

the only dog here is xue yang lmao

ssyifpfff🌙 if we dont, whos gonna do it????

4m 6 seconds ago OH ALSO

in all those punishing reincarnations, xue yang has quite a short lifespan

yeeting patriarch he never lives up his 30s

he has to die at more or less the same age as in his first go

so yea not to his 30s

ssyifpfff🌙 "he has to die" lmao sorry boi.............

3m 4 seconds ago how old was xue yang again

hes quite young right

yeeting patriarch on his 20s

ssyifpfff🌙 :/ im not sure

2m yeeting patriarch let's make it up he wont reach the 30s and it's ok

YEA LMAO

tbh idk the ages of any of the characters

only jin ling

ssyifpfff🌙 n sizhui

57s yeeting patriarch going thru the 20s only so many times is some punishment ksjdhgfshdj

LMAO TBH

WE RLY MAKING HIM GO THRU HIS TEENAGE YEARS N THN HIS 20S N THTS IT

ssyifpfff🌙 thts the cruelest thing we ever done

OH

yknow The Final Reincarnation

xxc, song lan and a-qing have this sense xue yang is Familiar

xue yang does as well

but hes the only one who gets the most fragmented dreams

the others get fragmented blurred light memories in dreams

this makes them Question xue yang

and thus this time he has to Work to have their affection

mostly xxc's, ofc

with song lan and a-qing it'll be a bit of a cat and dog frenemies thingy

yeeting patriarch (xue yang as the cat, ofc)

frenemies is all he has lmao + xxc

song lan.......................................... he wont rmmbr righgt¿

asdfghjfhg the fragments he gets are gonna be abt him n xxc too

ssyifpfff🌙 thts gonna Hurt

1m 10 seconds ago YESSSSSSSSSSS

all of them are Clean of Full Past Memories

yeeting patriarch but FATE will bring them all together (modern setting au)

song lan we will find u love this time around

10m 50 seconds ago xxc, song lan and a-qing will all get all the good stuff

only xue yang will still go thru some Missions

well.

if we will have poly xxc with song lan and xue yang

song lan will get some Punishment by default GSDHJFOISU9DYFGHJDS

it's okay, xue yang will be 69x times better this life around, so

he will only have to up with xue yangs dramatic ass in the name of love for xxc

yeeting patriarch i mean back then he did leave xxc and only came back yeeeaaars later in Regret

ssyifpfff🌙 ACTUALLY UR RIGHT HE MESSED UP TOO

6m yeeting patriarch enduring an updated and polished xue yang is OK

ssyifpfff🌙 bsides ..... whn they work together to bring xxc n a-qins soul back they're gonna start getting along a bit more

5m yeeting patriarch YES

ssyifpfff🌙 xue yang will have gone thru development by tht point

5m yeeting patriarch he will witness the path of xue yangs reincarnations

OMG IMAGINE THEM HAVING TO GO ON ADVENTURES TOGETHER FOR XXC

OMG SONG LAN THE SILENT WATCHER OF XUE YANGS STRUGGLES

ssyifpfff🌙 MAYHAPS HE MIGHT EVEN COME TO FEEL FOR HIM

4m by the time they all reincarnate, his sense of familiarity will be Different from xxc + a-qings

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

HOLY FUKC YESSSS NYAURORA YES

we did it, we made this amazing poly fucking work

WHAT ABOUT

THIS FINAL REINCARNATION

they kinda get those Family Vibes

a-qing comes a bit later on

yeeting patriarch 2 and a half dads and their daughter

ssyifpfff🌙 2 AND A HALF DADS ASDFGHGHKLJFA

2m yeeting patriarch (and a half because even so much reincarnations, xue yang isnt a proper dad)

hes like a k00l uncle

ssyifpfff🌙 a bit of a bad incluence uncle

2m yeeting patriarch actually this does song like a father to me

ssyifpfff🌙 but tbh if not for his bastardy, xue yang n a-qing would get along so well

1m the fuck up

SOUND*

LIKE

since he will have to earn for a-qings affection

the start will be rough

but later on, theyll be the Chaotic Duo

yeeting patriarch since this time around our xue yang is updated and polished to be the bastard on the right level

IMAGINE

one day into a distant future

all four together

yeeting patriarch with peace, happiness and warmth

ssyifpfff🌙 listenin to mcr?

3m and then

all of sudden

tears start falling from xue yangs eyes

yeeting patriarch hes all ???? about it

ssyifpfff🌙 NYARI

2m yeeting patriarch and the other three are just as shocked

ASDFGHJHG DONT

HES SO HAPPY

THIS TIME AROUND HES HAPPY FINALLY

ssyifpfff🌙 CENTURIES OF HURT

1m yeeting patriarch he doesnt understand why he got so overwhelmed

ssyifpfff🌙 OF HARD WORK TO BE BETTER

1m he cant make the tears stop

xxc gets super worried asking where it hurts

but... nothing hurts

yeeting patriarch THEN HE CRIES HARDER

ssyifpfff🌙 n thts whats making him cry!!! nothing hurts finally n hes glad!!

26s 3 seconds ago yeeting patriarch NOTHING FUCKINF HURTS NYASSHOLE. THIS IS HAPPINESS

ssyifpfff🌙 AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

19s 3 seconds ago yeeting patriarch HOLY SHIT WE DID DONE THAT

the first few reincarnations and how hard it was for xue yang

the stages of grief but thru his many reincarnations

with the last one, before the Modern Setting

him breaking down in front of song lan

finally it all hit him and he gets it

when they manage to sacrifice their souls for xiao xingchen and a-qing's, he even wishes to not be reincarnated again so they can be At Peace without him

yeeting patriarch their lives*

OMG XUE YANG WISHING HE JUST REMAINS DEAD. NOW THT HE HAS FINALLY GOTTEN XXCS SOUL THE LAST TEST IS AN ACT OF REAL SELFLESSNESS.

ssyifpfff🌙 its would b so good?? bc whn he first get introduced to xy his motivation as a character is to get xxcs soul so he can use it for his own good

42m 41 minutes ago n at the end he would GIVE his soul for xxc, for THEIR own good

ssyifpfff🌙 did we just invent character development?

42m 41 minutes ago yeeting patriarch WE MF DID DONE IT AGAIN

ssyifpfff🌙 also purple420 lmao

41m 40 minutes ago yeeting patriarch he Finally embraces all the grief he felt when xxc died

ssyifpfff🌙 HE RECOGNIZES IT AS GRIEF!! BC BFORE HE JUST FELT ANGER AT XXC OF ALL THINGS

41m 40 minutes ago back then, the emotional constipation got in the way and he fucked up

but after so many punishing reincarnations, he finally came to take it all in and Understand

imagine him breaking down so many nights begging to xxc to forgive him in a desperate prayer

and song lan then one day witness it

yeeting patriarch fukc the road with song lan was also such a hard one

song lan seein xy chara development from afar is the best idea weve had in a long time nyari

ssyifpfff🌙 we did that

38m 37 minutes ago in the first few... idk, 10 reincarnations, song lan was so angry. 'why does he keep coming back? why does he have his memories?'

yeeting patriarch fates would always put song lan in xue yangs path

ssyifpfff🌙 Fate (us)

36m 35 minutes ago yeeting patriarch how Dolce it is to imagine xue yang finally taking in grief and regret and it all and breaking down... *kisses fingers like a chief*

by that last time, song lan and xue yang sacrificed their lives, even song lan was already suffering seeing the punishments of all xue yang's reincarnations

he witnessed all of them

yeeting patriarch and saw with his own eyes, ops! with xiao xingchen's eyes, nyeheh. how much xue yang learned and changed

[fortheloveofcringe]

n e e d y //

I could go and write something where people would look up to me like a success story. That’s always a way to prove you’re something in the society you live in. It’s the easier choice, to make people feel like there is hope and success at the end of the dark tunnel but then people tend to overlook or push-back, the fact that there are things that happen along the road, they happen at the scariest time and moments in your life and never do these “people” who I have dealt with bother to feel it unless it needs to be felt. It’s like emotion these days has to have an on and off button. That’s scares me a lot, but then these days I’ve been thinking, being scared doesn’t do nothing to me, it just make me fight more, even after so much downfall and rejection.

Rejection, I’m going to touch bases with this one. Something I’ve dealt with my entire life. From my paternal grand parents making me feel like an abomination just because I was gay and no one in the bloodline has to be gay, or to the most fresh wound I have, which marks it’s first month today, me being single, after such a wonderful, scary and inspiring relationship with Timothy.

 You know something, perhaps I’m writing this as a formal closure to that chapter in my life because for so long I have been writing about so much sad stuff in the cloud of anger that I just want to get things off my chest differently which is to address this in a way where I’m the monster, and I’m not anymore pointing my fingers to the monsters in my story. I can’t even believe I called myself a monster right just about now.

 Anyway, Timothy, if you would read previous entries you might get the idea of a modern day fairy tale relationship. None of my wildest dreams per say. I adored him so much that it just hurt us both, badly. To cut the long story short. He just never needed me the way I needed him. It sucks. To just throw dreams of having a bright future with someone out of the window just because it hurts your eyes and you want to do a reality check but I guess that’s why we have sunglasses, they say it protects the eyes. I never realized some eyeglasses are fake and just do nothing but leave marks on your nose.

 Needy. I’m needy. I’ve been crying and going crazy for weeks now. This has been such a wild ride with him that looking back now I just feel like everything we had was just from a book. A Novel, a fictional one. I wish him the best however it just makes me feel a certain way knowing I have suffered more than he did. It’s like all the entire time I believe he had some reservations about us and he knew we are not going to work out and a few puzzle pieces come into my mind to support this claim. One, he never formally introduced me to his family because I think he never wanted them involved when it all crashes down unlike mine where my family had known him and are angry and tears knowing I almost tore my relationships with them just to have Timothy by my side. Two, being with him, despite the care and the love, felt like a love prison, for both of us. What I mean is I felt like he was just faking it to make sure he complied with the “ideal boyfriend” persona he describes himself as because there are moments when he had rolled his eyes at me to the back of his skull thinking “Hambert is not really worth it”. Three, and last, in support of number two, He admitted he wanted someone else. Not me. I’m glad I had so much time to make sure I have figure out the science of persuasion that I figured out a way to make him spill the truth to me and I have to say it was fucked up. Imagine being with a person beside you while his mind is off sucking someone else’s dick. That felt like boiling water in my freshly healed heart. Because I think breaking up is fine, sure some relationships need a time-off, but to know who’s replacing you? that’s just fucked up.

 This is where I got really and intensely angry at him that I made sure we really would hate each other after the end because my good side tried to patch things up with him even though it made me look so desperate running through their doors just to give him a movie or something so he wouldn’t be wasting time or whatever, but the bad side of me just wanted to get even so I made sure that I did some stupid things that actually, in the end, bought me peace of mind and of course some insights to process my pain.

 I met his the girl he dated before me. Which he just ghosted. I did that to catch his attention which ended up me having blocked by him on social media. My point of meeting this girl, besides my petty brain, was to make sure I erase this picture of him that I painted in my head, which was a handsome prince who picked roses for me every morning just to make sure I don’t dance in stems of thorns. Timothy was such a great man that he also made sure I would feel like nobody would care for me the way he cared. Which was debugged when I and Venus, the ex of my ex, had lunch over spaghetti, taco’s and the dick we both had in our mouths (and by dick we mean by attitude or literally, whichever comes first to your mind) When we talked I realized he has a cruel way of making sure you wouldn’t compare him to anyone. And the way he twisted their story to me, because when we spoke I realized Tim was such a liar he had to make her look thirsty for him and no woman should be painted that way, ever. That conversation I believe healed us both in a way were now, we’re friends and shit-talking about a guy full of shit which basically catered to what I want which was to make sure all of the good pictures in my head was crossed check for what is the actuality of who he was. In that moment me and Venus realized we were both used as a gateway for his lust to a guy named Gwen. I can’t call it love because I’m sure Tim has not have the opportunity to connect with Gwen on a deeper level so fuck fake smiles here, people.

 Who I thought was the man, that I’m willing to go through with all the hardships in my life, who would support me, and help me grow, turned to be a complete poser. This was hard for me because I know him in way that not Venus knows and I know very well that he’s a broken soul, but there is no rational reason to justify his pain to be carried over to his present life knowing well that he is old enough to fuck us both, and for him to be running around and break the hearts of people who loves him.

 What also bothered me was the fact tat he was just so ready to move on to the next page of his life which was by trajectory, was Gwen, and that he never muttered a word that would have potentially brought us back together. He was just so “Please I need new dick in my mouth I’m bored of you because you’re  a pain in the ass”.

 Pain in the ass was also one thing that he couldn’t handle. He never wanted anal with me. Now, I don’t know why but I have a strong feeling that would have it been Gwen to offer to top him, I’m sure he’d squat in less than a second. Forgive my bitterness overflowing in each word here, if you’ve been in so much pain, you might understand.

 The world isn’t big enough because this Gwen guy is a close friend of my friend Argie. Now long story short Gwen doesn’t do boys, or so he claims. Tim got dumped and now it’s a double whammy for our pretty boy Tim who thinks everyone is gonna drool for him. I hate him though. That Gwen guy, he haven’t done no shit. I can’t like him because he’s the friend of my friend and I know it’s not his fault, but sometimes disliking people just don’t need to be justified, we just feel the way we feel.

 I hate knowing he was my replacement just in case he was into boys because he’s manly, skinnier and lanky (as Tim admitted he like those kind of boys, one where he could pose as a pedophile) short, and it makes me more bitter going to work everyday passing their 3-story house making it feel like a slap to me for coming from a poor family. It was like “Hambert, your replacement is a handsome, skinny guy whose rich and that’s what our high maintenance Tim boy wants, bye, you deserve to be left, so sorry but not sorry, go ahead and die.”

 Got a chance to talk to him though and I think he’s smart from staying off the dirt because I would drag him in the mud with Tim on top of him so they could finally get to fuck one another for making me and Venus shed tears.

 Let me tell you one thing though. And this is fucked up. I still love him.

 I still feel his kisses on my lips. His face in my chest. The scent of his hair or his subtle way of putting his nose on my shoulders in the jeep. This is what breaks me to tears like right now. Because knowing I can’t have that anymore. It’s feels like death and I’ve had a fair share of losing people and tragedies from living so poor, not eating to being accused of wrong things, to be bullied in work or having my grandmother die while I’m carrying her to the hospital or maybe even growing up without a father, but I think this has been the greatest pain I’ve dealt with. To be in tears because of love.

 And I can go ahead and make stories about how I successfully dodged a bullet. But to be fair, I know that in those nights I spent with with him, the love we shared, I know he’s the love of my life and there could never be anyone. Because now I’m scared to be loved and be in love. I can’t embrace something that broke me.

 I’m now employed ans still studying. Things seem fine. I’m walking on a fire pit but I’m still alive.

 However if there is one more song we can bond over, just one last, I wish I can sing Ariana’s “Needy” to him. Just to make him understand. How good it feels to be needed.

[ellynxcos]

ANSWER ALL THE QUESTIONS FOR THE ASK MEME. ALL OF THEM. Or just 90-100, you know, whichever you prefer ;P

SCREECHES SUMMER WYD 

but nah that’s fine like I said I am b o r e d

1: is there a boy/girl in your life?

Yes cries a lovely wonderful girl let me die

2: think of the last person who hurt you; do you forgive them?

UH lol idk it depends on the day? Some days I feel really petty about it and other days I don’t care so much.

3: what do you think of when you hear the word “meow?”

my mind says ‘cats’ but my twitter feed says ‘nyah’ and i cry. that and :3c which like. is all Fox so i blame you

4: what’s something you really want right now?

5: are you afraid of falling in love?

 LOL NAH FAM

6: do you like the beach?

yes!! I love the beach, specifically east coast beaches because the water is actually warm enough to swim in 

7: have you ever slept on a couch with someone else?

no but i wouldn’t mind it if it were a significant other. like idk why but i’ve thought about it before, and i don’t mind being that close to ppl i’m dating

8: what’s the background on your cell?

A really generic apple-provided bg because I have too many apps to see the bg anyway rip

9: name the last four beds you were sat on?

this question confuses me. straight up. idk what its asking name the beds????

10: do you like your phone?

yes

11: honestly, are things going the way you planned?

no, but not in a bad way i guess

12: who was the last person whose phone number you added to your contacts?

UH okay I so rarely add numbers to my phone Idk how to answer this lol. Probably someone from work tho. OR NO MY FRIEND SARAH PROBABLY

13: would you rather have a poodle or a rottweiler?

Rottweiler 

14: which hurts the most, physical or emotional pain?

Emotional. 

15: would you rather visit a zoo or an art museum?

The zoo! I love animals, fam

16: are you tired?

ALJSDLKJSDF FOR ONCE IN MY LIFE??? NO, NO I AM NOT TIRED

17: how long have you known your 1st phone contact?

i mean my first was probably my mom so

18: are they a relative?

my mOM

19: would you ever consider getting back together with any of your exes?

lol no never the fuck

20: when did you last talk to the last person you shared a kiss with?

lmao years. but i. need to chANGE THAT I AM NEEDY AND SAD

21: if you knew you had the right person, would you marry them today?

yeah, sure

22: would you kiss the last person you kissed again?

no the last person i kissed was a dude

23: how many bracelets do you have on your wrists right now?

one bracelet and one hair tie

24: is there a certain quote you live by?

not really

25: what’s on your mind?

mostly my gf

26: do you have any tattoos?

just one, i want more

27: what is your favorite color?

oh god don’t ask me this. i like dark shades of almost every color? the only colors I really don’t like are orange and yellow. idk yellow is okay sometimes. i don’t like pastels much

28: next time you will kiss someone on the lips?

RIP IDK MAN BUT I HOPE SOON???? I JUST. RLLY WANT TO KISS HER

29: who are you texting?

usually my mom, roommate, and gf

30: think to the last person you kissed, have you ever kissed them on a couch?

no

31: have you ever had the feeling something bad was going to happen and you were right?

yeah, i’m sure everyone’s been there a time or two

32: do you have a friend of the opposite sex you can talk to?

yes

33: do you think anyone has feelings for you?

i sURE HOPE SO jk jk i know someone does

34: has anyone ever told you you have pretty eyes?

yeah

35: say the last person you kissed was kissing someone right in front of you?

....okay???? idc???

36: were you single on valentines day?

nope!

37: are you friends with the last person you kissed?

no

38: what do your friends call you?

Ellie

39: has anyone upset you in the last week?

lmao ya

40: have you ever cried over a text?

lmao ya fam i cry over everything

41: where’s your last bruise located?

shIN. it happened last night OTL

42: what is it from?

so one of my roommate left a cookie sheet on the fuckin stove top (IT’S BEEN THERE FOR FUCKIN D A Y S) and i was trying to get FOOD off the stove and my elbow knocked it and it tumbled to the floor and hit me right in the fuckin shin iM STILL MAD ABOUT IT

43: last time you wanted to be away from somewhere really bad?

lmao probably yesterday lbr

44: who was the last person you were on the phone with?

my mom

45: do you have a favourite pair of shoes?

not really, i used to tho

46: do you wear hats if your having a bad hair day?

lmao no if i’m having a bad hair day y’all are the ones who gotta see it, not me

47: would you ever go bald if it was the style?

no i get too cold with a full head of hair for that shit

48: do you make supper for your family?

no i hate cooking fuckin gOD

49: does your bedroom have a door?

i won’t live in a room that doesn’t have a door

50: top 3 web-pages?

tumblr, twitter, and probably ebay/amazon. or twitch lately

51: do you know anyone who hates shopping?

ya

52: does anything on your body hurt?

my fucKIN SHIN

53: are goodbyes hard for you?

yes

54: what was the last beverage you spilled on yourself?

hell if i know

55: how is your hair?

a wreck. it desperately needs to be re-dyed

56: what do you usually do first in the morning?

lay in bed lol

57: do you think two people can last forever?

yes of course

58: think back to january 2007, were you single?

lMAO NO I DON’T GOTTA THINK VERY HARD

59: green or purple grapes?

GREEN

60: when’s the next time you will give someone a big hug?

i don’t know and i hate that i don’t know. i know my family in May but like. hopefully sooner than that 

61: do you wish you were somewhere else right now?

ye

62: when will be the next time you text someone?

probably like 5 minutes

63: where will you be 5 hours from now?

asleep, hopefully

64: what were you doing at 8 this morning.

woRKIN 

65: this time last year, can you remember who you liked?

this time last year i liked the same person i like now ;))))

66: is there one person in your life that can always make you smile?

YE!!! aaaaaaaaa

67: did you kiss or hug anyone today?

no i wISH

68: what was your last thought before you went to bed last night?

‘gee i sure hope this anti depressant doesn’t fuck me up’ along with ‘why are my roommates so loud’

69: have you ever tried your hardest and then gotten disappointed in the end?

lol ya who hasn’t

70: how many windows are open on your computer?

TOO MANY DON’T ASK ME THIS

71: how many fingers do you have?

10 (fun fact i almost typoed this for 19)

72: what is your ringtone?

my volume is never on i don’t even remember LMAO

73: how old will you be in 5 months?

25, but turning 26 later that month

74: where is your mum right now?

home in Oregon

75: why aren’t you with the person you were first in love with or almost in love?

reasons i’m not willing to air on Tumblr lol

76: have you held hands with somebody in the past three days?

no unfortunately 

77: are you friends with the people you were friends with two years ago?

ye!!

78: do you remember who you had a crush on in year 7?

uh yeah lol how unfortunate

79: is there anyone you know with the name mike?

yes

80: have you ever fallen asleep in someones arms?

ye!!! i miss it

81: how many people have you liked in the past three months?

ONE, YO

82: has anyone seen you in your underwear in the last 3 days?

no

83: will you talk to the person you like tonight?

PROBS

84: you’re drunk and yelling at hot guys/girls out of your car window, you’re with?

no one b/c i don’t do that shit b/c I’M NOT A HEATHEN

85: if your bf/gf was into drugs would you care?

i mean, it depends on the drug. if it was just pot i wouldn’t have a problem w/ it as long as it didn’t rule her life. harder stuff is a no

86: what was the most eventful thing that happened last time you went to see a movie?

nothing really. i didn’t love the movie and i was bored

87: who was your last received call from?

my mom

88: if someone gave you $1,000 to burn a butterfly over a candle, would you?

uh no i don’t think so just reading that made me cringe

89: what is something you wish you had more of?

time and money

90: have you ever trusted someone too much?

yeeeep

91: do you sleep with your window open?

sometimes when it gets hot 

92: do you get along with girls?

lol yes??

93: are you keeping a secret from someone who needs to know the truth?

ehhhhh she doesn’t need to know

94: does sex mean love?

nah

95: you’re locked in a room with the last person you kissed, is that a problem?

no it’d just be awkward as hell lol

96: have you ever kissed anyone with a lip ring?

nope

97: did you sleep alone this week?

sigh yes sadly

98: everybody has somebody that makes them happy, do you?

yes i DO!!!

99: do you believe in love at first sight?

not really i guess, but like the second i saw this girl i knew she was special

100: who was the last person that you pinky promise?

i don’t remember lmao

[joons-expensive-gurl]

Lost Stars - Part 11

School was just as bad as you’d thought. Jungkook and Tae were secretly still fighting for your attention, constantly looking at you and trying to sit by you. Instead of giving in, you moved to sit by other people. One common denominator was Hoseok, since you already knew him to a point.

Jimin, over the time you’d been gone, had become so irritated with Jungkook’s and Tae’s now constant bickering that he’d isolated himself with Jihyun as his only company. Of course, once you’d returned, he allowed you to join their “new squad”.

Monday and Tuesday were the worst. Your lunch breaks were filled with all the horrific things Jungkook and Tae had done since you’d left. Jungkook had trashed Tae’s locker twice. Tae had thrown all of Jungkook’s work into the school’s toilets, it was so petty to say the least.

Wednesday was bearable. Two of your lessons became cancelled due to teacher illnesses so you got to spend more time with Jimin and Jihyun.

But one thing that was becoming more evident was time. You were running out of it. The wedding was now a month away. Your mother was absolutely frantic. Kijung was also permanently at home now, which only amplified her stress. You’d been counting the days since you’d last talked to either Tae or Jungkook and as time went on, you felt more and more empty.

You couldn’t avoid Jungkook forever. After all, he lived with you.

“I have an idea, why don’t you say what you have to to him while he’s sleeping? That way, you’ll have gotten it over and done with and he won’t even be able to argue.” Jimin suggested. “Isn’t that a little creepy?” You raised an eyebrow. “Not really. You know, if he’s not in REM sleep, there’s also a great chance he’ll hear you as well which will be a bonus.” “Sometimes I hate you.” “No you don’t.”

He wrapped an arm around your shoulder and pulled you into him.

“Don’t tell me YOURE trying to seduce her, now.” Came Jihyun’s voice as he strode over holding a bag of cookies. “Oh yeah. Totally. And she’s so into it.” Jimin winked at you and then rolled his eyes at his brother. “You wish.” You laughed.

~^*^~

Your mother and Kijung had gone out to eat, while you had stayed home. Jungkook was asleep in his room. So you figured now would probably be the best time to say what you had to say. As crazy as it sounded, venting to him asleep was better than nothing.

So, heart in your throat, you quietly moved up the stairs and to the door of his bedroom. Gently, you twisted the handle and opened the door. The room was dimly lit and nothing you’d expected. The walls were blue, the carpet grey, and the walls were covered in posters of musicians and space related articles. In all fairness, you had to give the boy credit. You’d expected hundreds of pin ups all over the walls. Jungkook was a deeper person than you gave credit for.

“So… uh…” you whispered in a hushed tone, “this was Jimin’s idea. To say what I have to while you’re asleep. He insisted even though I find this so creepy. But… here goes. I’m sorry for saying I hate you. Because I don’t hate you. I guess that in that moment I was just really, really angry. I mean, you and my best friend were having a punch up and I got hit. I also want you to know that I’m trying to just figure everything out. But it’s confusing. I’d really like it if you’d apologise to Tae. And of course I want him to apologise to you as well…. and Jimin. You both need to apologise to Jimin for fighting over me and causing him stress. I don’t want to see you fighting each other over someone as… someone as unworthy as me. Both of you can do so much better… anyway. I guess I’m sorry. You’ll have to give me time to figure out what to do. Im really thinking about it. Really. I’ll.. just go…”

With that, you shut the door and wen downstairs, face blushing in embarrassment. At least you’d finally said what you wanted to.

As the door shut, Jungkook let out a sigh, rolling onto his back. Because he was facing the wall, you had no idea he was wide awake. He’d heard everything.

“Fuck.” He muttered, bringing his hands to cover his face, “fuck.”

~^*^~

The next day at school, the first thing Jungkook did was apologise to Jimin when he was alone. Of course, Jimin graciously accepted the apology and agreed to be friends again under the condition Jungkook sorted out his problems with Tae. This was where it was tricky.

Tae was still pretty angry with the whole situation and it took Hoseok, Jimin and Jihyun to convince him to have a civil conversation with Jungkook. Finally, though, they agreed to meet up in the band room after school to sort everything out.

“Listen, man,” Jungkook started, “I’m sorry. You’re such a cool dude and we shouldn’t let a girl get between our friendship. I’d love to just… to just start things over for a second time. What do you say?” “Look, I can’t forgive you for fucking up my beautiful face, but how about we go back to Jimin’s place and get our final anger out on a couple rounds of Halo?” “Sure.”

They shook hands before leaving the school, talking like they’d never fought in the first place.

~^*^~

While Jungkook and Tae played, Jimin disappeared to give you a call. He told you that they’d made up (because of you. Jungkook told him he heard you. But Jimin didn’t mention this to you). He also insisted you came round and hugged it out immediately.

So you found yourself wandering to Jimin’s house in your sweats, looking like a potato. You didn’t even need to knock on Jimin’s door because once you were close enough, Jihyun opened up. He watched as you went down to the basement and shut the door behind you since he was staying upstairs. When they saw you, Jungkook’s and Tae’s eyes lit up. You walked over, congratulating them before hugging them.

An hour or so later, you decided to leave and Tae asked if he could walk you home to talk to you. You agreed.

“You go up first. I have to grab my stuff.” He told you. “Okay.” You did as he said, Jimin following suit. Tae turned to Jungkook. “Just so you know, this doesn’t make us friends. You’re cool but I’m still going after her until I’m too old to continue. And even then I’ll peruse her. No hard feelings?” “No hard feelings? You might as well rip my heart out. You’re an actual dickhead do you know that?” Jungkook snapped. “Of course. But just for [First]s sake, let’s pretend to be friendly.” “Whatever, man, go.”

Tae’s plan was in motion, what he didn’t know was that Jungkook was literally 5 minutes behind him, watching him walk you home.

The walk home with Tae was quite nice at the start. He joked about little things, just like what he used to do before this mess. But around the half way mark, things got deep. He began talking about the situation at hand and how it made him feel and how it would relate to how you felt, too.

“Are you glad I made up with Jungkook? Because I sure am.” He said. “I guess so.” “You know, he said he realised he messed up and that I should go for it.” He announced smoothly, trying not to smirk. “Go for what?” “You.”

He cupped your face with his hands, smashing your lips together. Just like last time, your eyes were wide with shock. You were frozen. But then you pushed him away.

“Don’t you dare. Don’t do this, Tae. Not now.” “You said that last time. When can I?” “When I figure everything out!” “What do you mean?! You’re actually considering fucking your step-brother?! Do you realise how fucked up that actually is?!” “You think I don’t already know that?! Fuck, Tae! You’ve made everything so complicated again! Just go home!” Your voice was becoming louder. “FINE!” He roared, before crossing the road in anger and disappearing.

Jungkook watched from a distance, anger bubbling inside of him as he watched you wipe your tears away. For a split second, he thought he heard you say his name. But you turned away and stomp off home. He followed slowly, unable to shake the feeling is anger he held for Tae.

~^*^~

As he crept past your room, he could hear the muffled sobs. He paused. He lifted up his hand to knock. He sighed. Then lowered his hand. Now wasn’t the time. You were also ready so confused, he didn’t need to make it worse. He moved slowly back to his room, shutting the door and lying with his face buried into his pillow. He let out a scream. This was so unfair.

~^*^~

“Tae… are you that stupid?” “She’s the stupid on, Jimin. She’s actually considering it. Do you know how weird that is?” “There’s nothing weird about it. They’re two people who have feelings for each other. What’s wrong with that?” “Um, how about the fact they’re legally brother and sister?” “Not yet, Tae. They aren’t yet. But you know what is weird, the fact that she genuinely sees you as a brother in her life and you’re trying to get in her pants.” “I am not. I’ve liked her since I met her, you know that.” “Yeah and you also know you had your chance a couple of years ago when she had a crush on you.” “That’s not the point.” “It is, though. You had your chance and you missed it. Jungkook’s next in line.” “Are you my friend or what?!” “Of course I’m your friend. I’m just being honest instead of telling you what you’d prefer to hear. Tae this is [First]’s happiness that’s on the line right now. I can’t lie to you about what to do just so you’ll be happy.”

Tae groaned, standing up from the kitchen table and storming out. Jihyun watched from the stairs as Tae left, slamming the door behind him. Jimin was right - this was getting messy.

~^*^~

“[First], I need you to stay behind for a bit after school. You missed a lot of work and I want to ensure you’re caught up.” The teacher spoke, voice hushed. “Alright.”

You were drained of any energy you could have possibly had. Last night, you’d come to the conclusion that Jungkook was the one you wanted to progress with. Tae hadn’t shown up for classes and you were worried you’d completely ruined your friendship with him.

After another 40 minutes of the teacher droning on, it was almost over. You just had to get through the catch up session with your teacher and you were done for the day. Freedom was so close yet so far away. The clock ticked as the seconds passed by while your teacher continued teaching you new things.

As soon as the clock reached 4, you were let go.

~^*^~

The strumming of a guitar lead you to the music area of the school. You walked to the end of the hallway where the door was slightly ajar. Someone was inside playing.

A voice.

‘Please don’t see Just a boy caught up in dreams and fantasies Please see me Reaching out for someone I can’t see’

You stepped forwards, pushing the door open a little more to see someone sitting in the centre of the now almost abandoned room. He was strumming a guitar, voice like gold. He lifted his head. It couldn’t be… it was Jungkook…

Take my hand Let’s see where we wake up tomorrow Best laid plans Are sometimes just a one night stand I’d be damned Cupid’s demanding back his arrow So let’s get drunk on out tears’

You couldn’t believe it. The voice of gold, it belonged to Jungkook of all people. There was no possible way. Your eyes were glued to his face as he sung. It was all too surreal.

As he continued the song, you couldn’t tear your eyes away from him. You couldn’t stop listening to the beautiful harmony he was creating.

'Who are we Just a speck of dust within the galaxy Woe is me If we’re not careful turns into reality Don’t you dare let our best memories bring you sorrow Yesterday I saw a lion kiss a deer’

What?

Your mind went back to the kiss with Taehyung. Was it possible Jungkook saw you? But… was Tae really a lion? Was he truly a predator out to take you down?

Even through your thoughts, you continued to listen to Jungkook sing. And as you watched him play the chords, you knew what you had to do.

'And I thought I saw you out there crying And I thought I heard you call my name’

Your eyes widened, again, in completely and utter shock. There it was. Confirmation he’d seen you and Tae. You’d cried. You’d called for him to save you. But if he did, why didn’t he go to you? Why didn’t he rush over and hold you?

Thinking, you listened as he strummed along to the end of the song.

Letting him finish, you quietly moved into the room, then dropped to your knees at his feet. He didn’t notice your presence until you leaned up, pressing a kiss to his lips. His eyes widened in surprise, noticing it was you, then he melted into the kiss.

It truly blew you away at how simply perfect this kiss was. The music had built up so much atmosphere that the kiss was like the climax of the song, despite it finishing.

You pulled away from him for air.

“[First]…” “Don’t. I made up my mind. Just let me talk to Tae, and then everything will be okay.” You whispered. “Okay.” He leaned back down, connecting your lips with his once more, “let’s go home.”