#im not trying to actually make money on this its just a hobby

[odietamox]

someone through my dad commissioned me a couple of amigurumi (three actually for Christmas. which means. I need to hurry up.) which is great because money! but also I dont know how I feel about it,,, or better I know I feel very anxious and im not sure I love it. I picked up crocheting because it's fun and relaxing and I'm not sure I want it to be a monetized thing

[fantastic-nonsense]

hi i love your blog!! especially your wonder woman rec list has been *amazing* and your batman comics guide with the little character spotlights is the best one ive found so far. thanks to your filtering of good/bad comics for all these characters i continued reading comics (after reading battle for the cowl as my first ever dc comic, which was. interresting. to say the least lol). but I have a little question - i couldnt find if you've answered it before already, sorry - which is: how do you read your comics mainly? bc as a college student, i dont have heaps of spare money around, and as an european, i dont have access to that dc online comics thing so if i read digital i have to pirate them. but i understand that comics kind of live-or-die by monthly sales and interrest in a run. and things like the current cass solo and absolute wonder woman seem really interresting and i want those to continue, so i try not to pirate them and wait for the trade releases, but its all very expensive when you start to read a lot of comics. and you have read a tonne of comics, which made me curious - do you buy physical copies, or just use the dc digital thing, or piracy, for your main reading? how do you keep this hobby, like, econnomiccally responsible? because i understand you can just pirate everything, but its not like im *too* broke to buy anything, ever. just wanted to hear your thoughts on how you personally do this, if you wish to share.

(ignore the word vomit, being precise in english is not a talent of mine :D)

Aww, thank you so much! I'm so happy to have helped you and I'm glad you're still here (especially after starting off with BftC)!

I'm going to be real with you for a minute before I actually answer your question: because you are a college student who does not live in the US, the realistic answer for you is to download Ublock Origin (something you should download anyway), open readcomiconline.li, enjoy reading comics, and if you find a comic you like and think is worth shelling out money for, find a way to purchase it legally.

I have an entire spiel on comic book piracy that I will not expound upon at length here but generally boils down to "piracy is rampant in the comics industry because it's the obvious and inevitable result of making legally reading comics expensive, difficult, platform-dependent, and inherently exclusionary while de-prioritizing collected editions, digital sales, and international readers. If any comic company decided to be a competent publisher for even one year, piracy rates would plummet."

If you're still concerned about the ethics of pirating comics after that, allow me to let you in on the worst-kept secret in history: professional comic creatives do it too:

Now, to actually seriously answer your question about how I read comics and keep my hobby financially sustainable: I've been reading and collecting comics for nearly 17 years. The ways in which I have read and collected comics have shifted several times over the years. I purchase some comics (mostly physically), I read some comics through my local library system, and I pirate others. I am fortunate enough to live near a good local comic shop, though this was not always the case, so I get a lot of my new comics there right now.

I have a lot more disposable income now than I did when I was in high school and college, but I'm also a fairly frugal person by nature. When I do buy comics, I almost never buy them new or at full price. I bought around 90-95% of the comics I own either used or on sale. I've used many avenues and methods to buy comics: Amazon and Ebay, the back issue bins and clearance sections at comic shops, the huge used media store near my parents' home that has a fantastic comics section, and sites like instocktrades that sell trades at a discount to name a few.

The exceptions are trades I know have fairly limited printings (and so will end up being more expensive in the long run if I don't buy them new and now) and single issues for runs I specifically subscribed to in order to finanically support. I usually limit myself to putting 3-4 runs maximum on my pull list at any given time; I simply don't have the funds, space, or desire to buy single issues at a higher rate than that. I'm a trades girlie at heart and that's where I will stay. I have zero guilt over not shelling out additional money to companies who clearly do not actually want it (otherwise they would make buying their products easier and would properly support their creatives).

I do own quite a few digital comics, which I mostly bought when Comixology was an independent site and used to run regular sales. Unfortunately Comixology has since been fully folded into the normal Amazon storefront and the Kindle Reader functionality for comics is incredibly subpar compared to the old Comixology app, so I basically no longer buy digital comics. However, I amassed quite a solid digital collection prior to the merger in 2022 (I have pretty much every Black Panther comic ever published up until 2020 because Comixology did a weeklong "get every BP comic for free" sale in the wake of Chadwick Boseman's death, for example).

This is what 16 years of physically collecting comics looks like for me:

As you can see, most of the comics I own are trades/hardbacks. I find that purchasing trades is cheaper, easier, a much more pleasant reading experience, saves space, and as a bonus is much prettier from a display perspective. The two white shortboxes on top of the shelf are where I store all of my single issues. After buying a new single issue, I "bag and board" it for preservation purposes and then put it in the box, arranged alphabetically by title, like so:

the tl;dr on my reading habits is that while I mostly pirate, especially for newer issues, I also use services like DC Infinite or my local library (both physically and digitally via services like Hoopla) to legally read older comics otherwise and then primarily buy in trade (usually used/on sale, rarely new) as I find them.

The floppies I own are mostly a) books from my pull list, b) very specific story arcs or runs that I love enough to work on collecting individually, c) comics I like that have never been collected, so the only way to own them legally is through hunting down and purchasing individual issues, d) issues with pretty covers that caught my eye, and e) a few random other issues here and there.

I also use RCO to reference comics that I've read when discussing comics online and writing metas, regardless of whether I legally own the comic or not. I'm not going to pull out my legally bought, physical copies of Cass's Batgirl run, scan them, and then upload the pictures every time I want to write meta. I'm going to go to RCO and grab a screenshot from the relevant issues.

While I wish it didn't work this way, reading superhero comics is a niche hobby that currently assumes you have lots of free time and lots of disposable income. Ultimately it is impractical and realistically financially impossible to legally purchase every comic you want to read and discuss with other people. Reading comics via other means (whether legally or through piracy) is actually foundationally necessary to ensure the industry continues, not just because of the traditional lack of access but also the sheer impossibility of buying individual comics at the scale necessary to understand and discuss the stories these companies publish. Not to mention the difficulty of discussing comics online if you are a physical reader/buyer.

Yes, the industry is severely outdated and still prioritizes monthly sales of physical single issues despite that not actually being a good indicator of a book's eventual financial success. Yes, ideally everyone would be able to legally purchase comics. But in reality, no one does so. I can probably count on my hands the number of comic readers I know who have never pirated anything. I don't begrudge anyone, especially people who live outside of the US and usually only have access to a very limited selection of stories, deciding to pirate comics. Please do so. You don't owe the Big Two shit. I only ever ask that if you ARE in a financial position to support the comics and creators you love by legally purchasing comics that you try to do so. Go and be free.

[pinkpigtailsprincess]

𝜗𝜚 ݁ ˖ Summer Glow up: creating new habits 🎀⭐️ *࿐ ࿔*:･ﾟ!

Hi Dolls!! Welcome Back 2 Dollies 2 Months of Summer Glow Up !! 🎀⭐️ Today im gonna talk all about implementing brand new habits in my life !!

> Hobbies !! 🎀

> Academics !! 📒

> Beauty Care !! 🧖‍♀️

> Scheduling !! ☀️

> Taking Baby Steps !! 🛼

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Hobbies!! 🎀

…: This Summer I Plan on Taking up Some brand New Hobbies to keep my self busy and learn about brand new things bc everyday is useful!! and so i can use my time more wisely some hobbies i have in mind are…

- Yoga

- Painting

- Creative Writing

- Learning Japanese + Spanish

- Reading

- Puzzles!

- Blogging

- Learning To Code

- Doll Collecting

- Book Collecting

- Sewing + Crocheting

- Digital Art

- Piano

and obvii im already a blogger but i still added it anyways i will watching videos on how to get into these hobbies and videos on learning Spanish and more Japanese, also fun fact i’ve actually been studying Japanese sine 2021 but i stopped bc it got to hard but im starting back up!! anyways, after i watch the videos im gonna set up a financial list bc i have the fund all of these but its okay bc i can easily get money!! 🎀

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Academics !! 🎀

More Goals of mine are to raise my grades in an academic space bc i do have decent grades but i wanna aim higher and have PERFECT Grades so in turn that means i must study more and have more discipline and not so irresponsible with my time!! and i also wanna study subjects outside of school bc its always good to learn something new!! now for learning tips so far i have..

- Flash Cards

- Practice Methods

- Teaching Someone Else

- Trying to explain it to a 5 yr old

- Study a Week Before

- watch ted talks on topics

- SLEEP

- write out notes

Now i Also Have a list of subjects i want to learn about!!

- drawing facial expressions + bodies

- Sewing Stiches + How to Hem and Crochet

- How 2 Draw Bodies + Poses

- Full Anatomy 4 Both Genders

- Japanese + Spanish + French + ASL

- Color Theory

- Learning Cursive + Improving Handwriting

- Expanding Vocabulary

- Religious Cults

- Case and Law

- Poison and Toxicology

- Astronomy

- Medical Surgical Instruments

- Matriarchal Societies

- Socialism Societies

Now i definitely won’t be able to do all of this all at once bc it would definitely we too stressful so im gonna choose as least 2-3 to start with and study them and just learn! 🎀🧁

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Beauty Care !! 🐬

📧: Now I already have my regular beauty care regime skin,hair,eyebrows,eyelashes etc. but im also more focused on getting weekly treatments & weekly beauty care habits like…

- Nails

- Hair

- Eyelashes

- Face Mask

- Hand + Foot Mask

And i wanna try and find people in my city that can do this especially for nails bc i would go to the nail salon but i feel like they won’t be able to do it exactly how i want it to be !!!

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Scheduling !! ⭐️

Now That im gonna be so busy i need to make sure i also stay organized with my time so it doesn’t lead to stress so ill have my regular school classes on my regular schedule then making dedicated hours to studying Things i wanna learn about + Language Learning!

My Workouts are always early morning before school in the evening hours before i got to bed so i won’t have to worry about that affecting my academics. With my Hobbies i feel like only some of them really need scheduling so ill also make time dedicated to those as well !!!!

Beauty Maintenance will probably always be on weekends for the stuff that weekly/bi weekly like face masks,manipedis,hair etc!!

and last but definitely not least!!

❤︎ ໋𓈒 Taking Baby Steps !! ⭐️

This whole process is still all new too me so i’ll definitely only be doing a little at a time and working my way up and i get more familiar with the change in my daily life and i won’t pressure my self to complete everything extremely quickly and just take my time with everything! bye bye dolls tysm 4 keeping up with me while doing this kisses 4 all of u!!! 🎀⭐️

[mamadarama]

IM SO SORRY IKEEP ACCIDNENTANLY UNFOLLOWIGN U BC THE ASK BUTTON IS NEXT TO IT 😭😭😭 i love ur content so MUCH i would NEVER unfollow on purpose omgg 😭

also anyways imjust wonderign , have u ever thought abt what would happen if yumenosaki didnt exisr inthe first place ???? like. what if they all jsut go live normal lives. or maybe if any of the major events in tthe storyline never happened. cause youre so amazing at analyzing stuff so id realllyyyyy like 2 hear ur thoughts <333 THAMKYOU!!!!! have a nice day :DD

OHH LOL OK i was like hey didnt this person follow me the other day? ive done that before too

i have thought abt that!!! i think some of them would still end up being idol adjacent? also a lot of characters grew up in the same area so they might end up going to the same school or smth anyways so theyd still know each other.

wataru is a stage/movie actor and eichi buys vip seats to all his shows until he notices him . kanata and kaoru are both marine biologists. madara is still exiled and starts traveling doing god knows what, but comes home to japan sooner than he wouldve if eichi didnt stall him during the war. in japan he continues to do god knows what. odd jobs and the like. chiaki and kanata still meet and kanata is saved from the cult. chiaki might go on to become a professional basketball player? izumi and makoto dont have a falling out bc the war never caused leo to break down, so izumi doesnt get paranoid for makotos safety. both of them along with arashi are models and leo is still a composer. arashi would also be a divorce attorney purely on the basis that i think she would be really good at it. rei retains most of his 2nd yr personality and simply mellows out a little instead of acting like an old man, and his friendship with keito wouldnt fall apart. keito is a mangaka and a teacher. hes trying to keep those identities separate but who knows how long thatll last. koga and rei still form deadmanz but keito wouldnt join. instead theyd be a duo unit until koga invites adonis to join, and this time adonis actually gets the chance to since deadmanz wont disband before koga can invite him. kaoru might join later, but its more of a hobby and his primary goal is still taking over and carrying on his mothers research. he works at kanatas aquarium. adonis is a park ranger. i think souma would be a teacher. either biology or a weapons class, or both. kuro and shu are both fashion designers but kuro would specialize in costumes and shu would do mostly high fashion lines for runways. kuro also does wrestling, he intended for it to be just a hobby but he ended up being a fan favorite so now hes better known for that than he is for his costume work. mika is shus apprentice still. hiyori is dawdling and unsure of what he wants to do, but in the meantime hes busying himself with making youtube videos (think jenna marbles). he still meets jun in school. jun is a streamer but he also has a fitness blog and works part time as a personal trainer. pretty average life but with the added bonus that he lives with hiyori, so he doesnt have to worry about money as much. nagisa is a geologist and historian. he works at a museum, thats about it. he still stayed with hiyori until he was adopted by his current family. ibara is the ceo of some company. yuzuru is toris butler still and tori is learning what he needs to do as his family's heir. tsukasa is doing the same. yuzuru and ibara dont meet again after ibara leaves the military facility. ritsu is a professional pianist, hes known for theming his performances around his vampire thing and playing creepy organ music, except on a piano. mao is a freelance photographer and a tutor. makoto continues to be a model, but also does gamedev and photography on the side. he also streams with jun and natsume and has a radio show with the rest of trickstar. anzu would still get transferred to whatever all boys school trickstar is going to, but instead of being trickstars producer shes just part of their friend group and theres no war. switch exists as a magic act, performing at events and whatnot. tsumugi also has his own fortune telling business and works as a librarian, and sora is a competitive gymnast. hajime is a botanist and works for the city managing public gardens. mitsuru became an olympic athlete. when nazuna graduated he went to college to do ...whatever it is hes doing. since there was no unit keeping them together, he was able to just stop talking to shu and they eventually drifted apart painlessly. tomoya and hokuto are actors. subaru is a solo idol. the twins street performances took off and they became a well known acrobatic duo. shinobu is a radio host and has a podcast where he talks about anime. tetora is a competitive martial artist. midori happily works as a vegetable farmer with his family.

rinne and niki live the same way they did before becoming idols, except niki has a cooking show. tsukasa secretly helps kohaku escape from his family and silently passes his allowance over to kohaku so he can live somewhere safe. as soon as he can he gets back into contact with aira. he lives alone like niki did when he was 14 and spends a lot of time in the library trying to homeschool himself. aira is still an idol fanatic but doesnt become an idol. hiiro goes to look for rinne, but rinne refuses to leave and hiiro goes home after making rinne promise hell still visit home sometimes. hiiro takes rinnes place as the next monarch. tatsumi and kaname still go to the same school but kaname never has the accident, so oremeru never abandons his identity and has no reason to hate tatsumi. tatsumi is learning to be a priest from his dad and will eventually take over as the pastor at his family's church. since es was never built on the same land as the ayase's bunker, mayoi would stay underground for longer. if he left at some point hed be a visual artist and submit his work to galleries. he probably wouldnt meet the rest of alkaloid, at least not right away.

so thats what i think would happen, more or less.

[shirefantasies]

hiiii, just wanted to say i adore your blog, and i hope you're having a wonderful day! i don’t know if im late to requesting a matchup, but if you’re still doing them, im 5’9”, bi, ace and female. I’ve played the viola for almost a decade now, even though i hate performing due to stage fright, i LOVE to read, mostly fantasy and mystery, and am a massive art history and architecture nerd. i collect house plants and knit and crochet for fun. i’m pretty shy but once i get out of my shell i am extremely sarcastic yet cuddly lol.

-🪴

Nope, they’ve been opened up! Hope you like The Hobbit because I match you with…

Bofur!

Performing your viola in a tavern, you can’t help noticing the eyes of one particular patron stuck to you like glue. Puffing on his pipe thoughtfully, he maintains an intense, beckoning gaze your entire performance. When the keep tells you you’ve a drink from a guest, there’s not a single doubt in your mind it’s from the bloke in the hat. A spike of nerves runs through you- that had been one of your first performances with an audience, and having any sort of reception only heightens the self-awareness you're trying to avoid.

Accepting your drink, you nod a thanks at the hatted patron, who naturally heads your way. "Never seen you here before," he remarks. "And you may not much still," you shoot back, "I needed a spare bit of coin, but I did not visit this town to perform." "What did you visit it for?" "To study some of the neighboring towns and help repair them. What I have always really wanted to be is an architect." Whistling, the dwarf gives a big smile, one that tells you exactly how blown away he is. "By my beard, I didn't know I was in the presence of a genius. Well, here's hoping I'll see your designs one day!" "Oh, I have some with me, did you want to-" "Bust 'em out, lassie!"

Bofur, as it turns out his name is, ended up being quite the fun company. Perhaps, you consider, you will return to that tavern after all. As it is, your work carries you deeper into town, or rather you should say its ruins. Burnt as the buildings are, though, your scans and sketches give you a good sense for the overall style and structure of the place once called Dale. A team of dwarves awaits your sketches of one of the larger complexes, accepts them, and you move on. One structure stands out to you immediately, the cutest, coziest little place tucked away at the side of a dilapidated marketplace. "Whose is this?" You ask the dwarf builders. One sets aside one final stone on the cart he is loading to reply, "That would be one of ours, actually, lass. Three fellas from the Lonely Mountain bought that one. Plan on putting in a toy shop, they said." Your heart is beyond moved. "I want to design it." "What?" "I want to design it. Can I speak to them?" Nodding, the dwarf shrugs. "Why not? Not sure what they have in mind. I'll send for them."

What are the odds that they bring forth Bofur? Grinning and still in that hat, the dwarf introduces you to his cousin Bifur and his brother Bombur. No strong family resemblance, but the three of them are clearly thick as thieves. Bofur himself begins talking up your skills immediately, calling you a master architect and a viola virtuoso to boot and making you giggle. He shows you some of their little pull-alongs and wind-ups, bringing further smiles to your face and compliments to your lips. “See?” He says to the others, shooting you a wink. “She’s even got good taste.”

They all unanimously love your vision for the shop and even help out with rebuilding, so you get quite close to the entire plucky little trio. You almost refuse all the payment they offer, giving you money for your design efforts as well as a cut from the crocheted dolls you’d let them sell. Your shelves were getting full from your hobby, after all. Each dwarf gets a handmade gift as well: thick, warm gloves for Bombur’s mining trips, a bag for Bifur to carry his supplies in, and a new scarf for Bofur, who throws his arms around you and swears he’ll never take it off. You take it as a joke, but he always seems to have it slung around his neck from then on…

They often let you work quietly, take your time to recharge and just pull you into the occasional question or joke. Thus, you’re certainly not expecting Bofur to sit at your side one day while you work, hemming and hawing and wringing his gloved hands before he finally asks if you’ve ever put much thought into settling down. “Not that a toy shop is all that much excitement, but-” Grinning, you cut him off. “I thought you’d never ask.”

Taglist: @lokilover476 @fuckyoumakeart @mossthebogwitch @ibabblealot @kilibaggins @joonies-word @stormchaser819 @pirate-lord-of-narnia @datglutengoblin @letmelickyoureyeballs @mossyskinn | Reply/Ask/Message to join 🥰

***MATCHUPS ARE CLOSED***

[joelsprettyprincess]

get to know your moots!! 💫

tagged by @dilfhuntersintl thank you! <3

what's the origin of your blog title?: i love joel. and i want him to call me his pretty princess. therefore...joelsprettyprincess. 🥰

OTP(s) + shipname: i spent SOO long in the genshin fandom that i am so turned off by shipping in general. however rn i am obsessed with 457 (squid game), butchlander (the boys), and hannigram of course. can you tell i like my yaoi as depraved as possible?

favorite color: PURPLE!!!!!!!! specifically a very light, almost grey/white shade of purple, kind of like lavender. followed by blue, pink, and black.

favorite game: 2 years ago it would've been genshin but i dropped it. rdr2 is deffo up there. stardew valley i have soo many hours in. the game i have the most hours in tho, is the sims 4. i have almost 2k hours and over 4GB of mods 💀 i've spent far too much money on that game..

song stuck in your head: songs are constantly revolving in my head. the last couple have been beverly hills by weezer, beating down yo block by monaleo, and von dutch by charli xcx.

weirdest habit/trait?: pretending im a superstar and belting out the lyrics to whatever im listening to 😭

hobbies: writing, binging tv shows (watching yellowjackets currently), videogames ofc, doomscrolling...watching movies when i feel like it, reading webtoons. im now realizing i need more offline hobbies.

if you work, what's your profession? rn im just focusing on school but i'll probably have to get another job soon 💔

if you could have any job you wish what would it be? ....twitch streamer or youtuber...it just seems so fun and i always pretend im streaming when i play games 😭

something you're good at: writing, i think?! i would like to write actual novels as a side job one day.

something you're bad at: locking in, prioritizing work over play. im trying to get better tho.

something you love: listening to music in the car. seeing my hard work pay off. when its rainy and sunny at the same time. rereading yalls comments on my fics 💖

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff: MY SIMS!! i've had a "legacy" family for generationsss, i think we're on the...eighth? maybe? right now my family is a super-smart professor who's the son of a pop idol, married to a gorgeous trans lawyer, and they have 3 kids plus a dog named carrot <3.

this is lowkey making me want to make a sims sideblog 😭

something you hate: tailgating when im already speeding. people with no ambitions or goals. strawberries.

something you collect: dolls, specifically ones with historical outfits. there's tons at thrift stores cuz no one else wants them 😅

something you forget: EVERYTHING. its actually annoying and im pretty sure its adhd or smthn but i dont have the money or patience to get diagnosed

what's your love language?: acts of service and gift giving.

favorite movie/show: shows? succession, the boys, squid game, bojack horseman...im sure im forgetting some. twd will probably be up there when (if) i finish it. movies: everything everywhere all at once is my fave, i also LOVE coraline and tangled.

favorite food: enchiladas. yum. they're so good...i love mexican food...

favorite animal: seals, tardigrades (THEYRE SO COOL LOOK THEM UP!!!!), cats.

what were you like as a child? super shy, super smart, always reading. simpler times..

until 6th grade when i discovered wattpad. 💀

favorite subject at school? english!

least favorite subject? math...im not bad at it, i just don't like it. at least it's straightforward, you can excel with enough practice.

what's your best character trait? i like to think i'm super funny but i can also give good advice.

what's your worst character trait? i am so, so cringe.

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be? i have an awful headache thats probably cuz i haven't had a drop of water today.

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet? anyone in history?! idk!! theres way too many people! maybe eve so i could tell her NOT TO EAT THAT APPLE. that's really the origin of all my problems 😓

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!): ughh, i love so many. but there are two that equally live in my head rent free: strangers by wintrwinchestr and smother by beardedjoel. they both inspired me to put my writing on here and they're both crazy nasty and dark. 🤭

okay SO SORRY for yapping but that's what i do best! some tags, no pressure: @thoughts-of-bear @mssalo @buneio @lovely-vamp-princess

[davekat-sucks]

this might be somewhat offtopic, maybe not. i feel like advertisements and a money grabby world influences alot of peoples arts now a days and its quite apparent in fandom art as well.

the way people approach art is similar to showcasing a product, or a advertisement. no focus on backgrounds, no focus on story telling...

this is why you see stuff constantly with people focusing on gender identities and sexualities solely, as if its a product to advertisement. "get your new BIGENDER NEPETA DOLL" or something of the sort.

there is nothing beyond this, no story, no depth, nothing. just a product with a label. and i will be honest im so sick of fanart and art in general like this.

im saying this as someone whose a nonbinary autistic fuck but like, there is more to life than just gender identities and sexualities. i think its nice every now n then to embrace that but it feels like people are devoid of ideas? it feels like no one has anything to say, nothing to talk about. no interesting ideas to put forth. i really really dont care about lgbtq focused art like this.

like you mentioned what about stuff focusing on dave's interest in collecting dead stuff? or eridans interest in history and war? why is there no fanart on this kind of stuff? i want to see the kind of fanart that focuses on a characters hobbies, weird interests, WHY they might be into it or the weird habits they have due to those interests.

i also feel like this absolutely ties into ship art as well. it has the same essence of devoid of creativity for me that lgbt focused fanart does. cookie cutter images of characters standing next to eachother blushing in a blank void a million times over and its just kind of like... why do i care?

People think things such as personality and story come second to the characters when often times, it is needed to give audiences/readers a reason to care about them and the world they live in. All they are doing is just a checklist at times to see how progressive they are in order to get brownie points. I think why people don't go further in a characters' interest/hobbies or quirk is often because implications that may go deep the further one thinks about. For example: Eridan being into war and military history means him having a strong opinion when it comes to something like World War 2. Being the douche who is proud of what he is born as (a seadweller), people are scared thinking he might actually like Hitler. Even him reading something like Mein Kampf makes people flip the fuck out. If people want to say he draws the line at that, nobody can present an explanation of him in-character that would try to suggest he is against it. It's like people think certain bad guys draw the line at transphobia even when said villains have world-ending abilities at their fingertips or is known to be insane to harm anyone if they breathe within 3 yards. It makes all the ironic since they never do the same implications if they apply it to certain characters when headcanoning sexuality or race. Like people who blackwash Crona from Soul Eater, forgetting the fact that he was ABUSED BY HIS MOTHER. So are they fine with characters suffering even by their race or are they not? It's hard to please others these days on what depictions is okay to draw/write and what is not. Lots of ship art at least in the West, really plays it safe and only concerns to fluff and both couples being happy. Which is fine, but sometimes, relationships, from friendship and love, is a lot more complicated then that. Why isn't there much ships art or comics about one person being bad a cooking, but their partner endures it and eats it still because they didn't want to make the other feel sad? Or for the hate-fuck kind of side, have the two look badly damaged after they try to beat the partner up in crazy ways, but they still endure it because they don't want to be seen as weak or giving in to the other? Lots of people want that fairytale kind of romance where everything is nice and nothing bad happens. But at times, there is a better connection to seeing how people can face certain problems and find solutions to different situations they are in. Maybe we have been through that or it is something we are scared of thinking it could happen.

[asexuwales]

i dont know who i am

what is my identity

i like lots of things

i also dont like alot of things and i know what they all are

i appreciate some things but sometimes they dont really hit the same when i actively think about them

like shadows and such

they seem so pointless out of context

idek who im trying to be

well

im trying to be someone with a sense of self

but as a nihilist it doesnt work out too much

people say im not a nihilist because i have a job i want to do and hobbies

nihilists dont just sit around doing nothing we do get bored

but how we would love to

there isnt a point to anything

maybe were big thinkers who see too much outside of the big picture

whats the point in spending so much time earning money when it was just a system set up because we accidentally discovered fire

if you dont comply to the government in anyway the only way is jail

maybe jail is a nihilists endgame

i wouldnt mind being in jail

but other parts of me are relieved that ive finally found somewhere to belong

my insides clash i guess

growing up without a stable base or stable reliable people in my life leads me to want to find a home

but my personality wants to just give up because life is so fucking boring anyways

so why dont i give up its supposed to be the easy way out

but it really isnt

the paperwork

the possesions

the relationships

having to change my stable base again

japan has become the longest stable place ive ever had

which is crazy to think about

the longest ive ever stayed in one place is like 2 years

the dragon was 5 years but i changed house and people like every 2 years

even before i started boarding we didnt stay in a house longer than 2 years

but why do i desire a stable place to stay

was it really that awful

because i didnt notice it was awful

it was just life

idk how it would have affected me

this stupid sense of self affects every part of my life and my work

the problem i have with literally everything stems back to who am i

i really dont know who i am

its messing me up

i dont know how to find out who i am when i already know what i like and what i dont like

what am i missing

i really feel like im missing something

its not as simple as what i like and what i dont like

theres something else

that everyone else seems to have no trouble understanding

i really need help with that

but i dont know how to work around to that because everyone always stops at what i like and what i dont like

what other parts are there to me as a person

what creates a personality

INTP

im introverted i get my energy from being alone

im intuitive i activley search for new things and enjoying changing my opinion and evolving

im a thinker i make decisions logically and analyse things before i feel them

im a perciever im more random and spontaneous

but that doesnt tell me anything i dont already know

if i enjoy learning things why am i a nihilist

who do i think of myself as a nihilist if i constantly want reasons and answers

WHAT THE FUCK AM I MISSING

when i talk about my likes i dont actually like them

but when i see them i like them but i think about how i dont like them when talking about them

that doesnt include my interests

specifically naruto ive never been bored talking about naruto

what music do i like

all music music is better than no music no matter what it is

what movies do i like

dead poets society

which is crazy but its a movie about optimism

i know i dont like romance

unless i do

then i do like romance

a very specific lack of fluff but not toxic kind of romance

i wear tshirts and baggy trousers

i dont wear skinny trousers because theyre uncomfy to sit in

that's probably because they dont fir properly

but i dont have the money for properly fitting skinny trousers

they gotta have a stretch

i lie about alot of things

i paint myself as not a lier

but i really am a chronic lier

lying gives me a sense of security i think

i can control what others perceive me as

but i dont want others perceiving me

do i want control

i know people find me annoying but thats been so oversaturated in my life that i really dgaf anymore

everyone finds me annoying and theres nothing i can do about that

i like the dark

idk how to talk about things deeply

im so surface level

so why do i do therapy

i feel like i have nothing deep to talk about

because im so surface level

so why am i like this

i wish other poeple would try to understand me as much as i understand them

if im surface level why do people not understand me

maybe my worst fear is that im making all this shit to be way bigger than it actually is and that im just a normal person with some sort of victim complex

just sick and tired of life i just wanna lay down and never wake up again

i wont be losing anything when i die

[fake-ascension]

i guess i need some. advice? encouragement? about some stuff thats been happening recently so suicide/violence cw under the cut

i won't go into detail but i had. a very huge emotional/physical/mental breakdown today. where i was just. basically screaming and howling about how suicidal ive been lately. I haven't said anything out loud/via text on the internet abt it because i know saying i want to kms so often is bad for my own well being and ultimately makes other uncomfortable as well

so yeah i've just been. holding all that in. i knew the thoughts were coming in and out the past few months but was just shrugging it off as just being stressed abt the nightmare year i had. but i really was just. lying to myself and others because i didnt want to worry anyone/didn't want to admit how horrible i was doing after a couple years of good progress. but as it stands things are heading into a really bad direction for me rn. its not normal to go to sleep suicidal and immediately be suicidal upon waking up.

I don't really know what i can really do harm reduction wise. i'm unable to have regular visits with a psychiatrist/therapist bc of availability issues + i tend to just. lie. because its easier to say im fine than it is to advocate for myself and get actual help. and even then medication will not save me and coping skills can only go so far if im so deep in it im unable to take care of myself/feed myself/clean myself/eat/etc so none of it is effective enough in the moment. i know it CAN be effective and some of the skills ive learned can help during situational issues but this is really deep rooted improperly treated mental illness and i need a stronger foundation to be able to use any of the skills

i use a means of self isolation to punish myself, because i'm so upset with myself for not being able to pick myself up on my own. people can say im not a burden over and over but theres always gonna be a catch in the end. i freak out because what if this is one of my last meltdowns before they decide enoughs enough and i just get abandoned. again.

I feel like maybe being so Online is making things worse?? but i don't know??? my concentration is completely gone even when trying to use dnd/closing discord completely and im just constantly refreshing social media every 10 seconds and just stew in the bad feelings.

I don't know if just. leaving the internet cold turkey for a bit would do more harm than good.....i dont want to be alone and caught up in my thoughts. but i have a hard time doing things in 'moderation' and don't know how to even begin to roll back my internet/screen time usage

fandom is fun and great. but i dont think i should be using video games as pure escapism or playing them 24/7. im already getting bored and unenthusiastic about the things i like because its ALL i do.... I want to have at least SOME time away from screens. i hate having the impulse the check social media or refresh even 30 seconds (im even doing it NOW) but i just dont know where to begin in cultivating non-screentime hobbies and have the ability to focus on things more long term without having than doing 1000 things all at once to keep myself busy. i play video games muted most of the time, have a yt video playing, sometimes i'll stop mid video game and pull out my ipad while still having the games open, and im always on discord

there's books i still want to read, i eventually want to pick up sewing again. im considering getting a craft set for making those beaded bracelets (my brother gets them from concerts all the time and thinks it would be fun to make them too) but that all requires money

and i just. idk where im going with this rn but. any advice or suggestions or just. words of encouragement would be. really nice rn

[sout999]

dear tumblr ,,⋋(•◇•)⋌,,

thank you so much for all the support on my top surgery fundraiser, whether it's donating, reblogging or just staying patient with while i boost the link multiple times. which i am going to keep doing! it's no understatement that this is the single biggest positive thing that's happening in my life, and the time i need your help most. so i'm making my voice heard as much as i possibly can to spread the word, and i appreciate all your help with it. it makes me feel loved as a person and not as a bunch of posts on a dashboard, i've been getting pretty isolated because of mental health stuff so even the small connection we have from your act of goodwill is really meaningful to me

i've been ok, mostly putting in work on my masters degree, although some of the 'work' included having a massive breakdown from months of burnout, and i'm currently in the middle of trying to get an extension and rework a large part of my project. mostly this is due to the subject matter of my work having had a lot of loaded cultural and personal themes, which, when being forced to think about nonstop for two years, while also moving in with the family member who is the source of a large part of all the trauma of it, was just too much. taking a stance to axe the project in its current form was hard and made me feel like a quitter but now i feel relief and realize it was an act of self love as well

so i'm trying to recover from that and see a way forward to a project i would like doing, but it's hard when your circumstances have left you this depressed. i'm also trying to become more mindful of the way i use social media because when i'm anxious i fall very easily into the numbness sink of scrolling social media just to avoid thinking... i've stared a daily list of Ten Things That Happened That Day That Didn't Happen On The Internet, although i never get to ten, and i dont think even pre-internet leon would have gotten to ten, but it's good to aim high and take notice even of the little things. maybe to some people this comes naturally but i have to be very deliberate about it. i think this article sums up how im starting to feel about the internet rn

i've cut most personal spending down as much as possible to save up to my top surgery, so i have to find fun things to do that don't cost money. i'm trying to sew because my partner knows a lot about it and can teach me (i'm currently trying to engineer the perfect underwear, weird hobby but it's actually an amazing dysphoria-buster because most store bought underwear that fits my ass is so feminine, to be able to make a piece of something so intimate be so personal is, omg, an act, of, omg, self love). i've also sold off some things to help save for my top surgery and doctor visits, i'm trying to not get rid of anything i will really miss but it's also an enjoyable feeling to imagine the item disappearing as it becoming a permanent part of my history and of my sexy flat boy body (~o_o)~

if i end up having some free time outside of my masters degree, my current dream project is making pixel assets. i think with all the cases of my art getting stolen and used without permission it would actually be really cool to put something together specifically for public use. i miss kaoani and flower banners and stuff. i dont know if i can ever make something so saccharinely cute and tidy but if anything it's a nice space to visit

did you miss me coming to tumblr to make long winded posts about nothing? hopefully when twitter falls we will all be on here reading each others paragraphs, hopefully i'll have more going on in my life and can write even longer ones. here is a nice drawing, and a link to the fundraiser once again :)

https://gofund.me/958124b6

[cannedvampirejuice]

also bc im overthinking abt this - room situations with detailed notes

ROOM A - Oberon was originally rooming with Jalter - both of them didn't fill out anything on the roommate form - but he never cleans anything up ever which drove her crazy. Eventually they had a huge blow up fight so he lives alone in his garbage now. She will stop in to grab her mail since its still delivered to that room, but the atmosphere is never pleasant. Usually once a month someone will have to "save" Oberon from the trash because it starts stinking up the hallway.

ROOM B - Mostly normal and pretty clean, the only oddity is that Asclepius will essentially study Dantes like a bug in a jar. The Caster then of course updates our favorite Berserker Nightingale on the current condition of her favorite patient. They only argue when Dantes smokes in the room and not on the ground floor (Asclepius would prefer he quit, honestly, but there's some battles you just can't win). Asclepius will sometimes keep labeled specimens in the fridge and cabinets, but Dantes lets it slide because they are always properly labeled and away from the actual food.

ROOM C - While they have incredibly similar habits due to being the same person, Junao can get distracted and will accidentally leave food out or forget to take out the garbage occasionally. Fights are incredibly minimal, more a sigh and complaint and then a resolution to do better. Their room is the cleanest by far, though the competition isn't really trying. Its normal to want a good grade in apartment right? Archer thinks so. The two also have the most guests coming and going, from Osakabehime to Karna to Constantine to Parvati and many many more.

ROOM D - Originally inhabited by just Scathach and Murasaki, Jalter now sleeps on their couch. The room is organized chaos, with Jalter's stuff filling the living room, stacks of books everywhere that don't fit in Murasaki's room, and all sorts of hobby magazines from fashion to fitness to cooking on top of actual work out equipment from Scathach hiding everywhere. Sometimes there's arguments because someone almost tripped, or broke something that was left out, or didn't do the dishes, but the atmosphere stays consistently livable. Usually just called "The Girls Room".

ROOM E - Incredibly Suspicious Mage Room. It stays pretty clean, but theres a pretty clear dividing line between their stuff. Almost like the apartment is split in two. On one half is Douman's that essentially an evil mage workshop, and the other half is Merlin's where it looks and smells like a flowershop. While they definitely tease each other they never actually fight and both consider the other a "friend" by their own definitions. Little Shikigami also fly about the main living area and Douman's room, almost like pets.

ROOM F - Somehow both compatible and incompatible at the same time. Izou can be a rough roommate to handle (leaves garbage out, occasionally breaks things, sometimes blows the money he was saving for rent on a gamble) but makes up for it in having some ok skills in cooking and occasionally cleaning. Izou also has the courtesy to usually go out if he wants to be loud and party, giving Salieri much needed alone time where he can recharge and just listen to music alone for some hours. When they do argue (usually over Izou being too noisy or an issue with rent split) it's never catastrophic and they patch it up after a few hours (usually because ryouma helps izou out).

[lonestatus]

game brought tp you by a tag from the wonderful @hackercult ^-^

favorite color: yellow i think its so lovely especially when it gets to hang out with other warm colors like red and orange and. well those are all the warm colors. but pink is pretty cool too

currently reading: been taking a break from reading while i get settled in and find a job so uh. indeed job postings

currently watching: the great big beautiful world pass me by

last song: boys dont cry by the cure. i put my songs on shuffle so the last real song i decided to listen to is the times they are a-changin' because i made a joke while playing vic3 with a friend and remembered the song so i listened to it. im brave enough to admit it.

currently cravin: pizza, burgers, and fried chicken. ive mostly been eating thai and pb&j type food lately so im actually growing reminicstnt of the stuff. but more than any of that i want money <3333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333333

coffeeee or teaaa: coffee id love to be a tea girl but idk i never put in the effort to make the switch. but i like coffee still dont like black coffee but with a little milk and maybe some sugar its pretty good. especially if you use a french press instead of just drip coffee

hobby i wanna try: music band. ive wanted to be part of a band since i was like 8 lol never happened but ill still keep writing shitty songs. also translation i think it would be so fun to like. figure that out though im not good enough at any language to really try more than a few sentences. and lastly streaming i hardly ever play videogames unless its for an audience on account of its the only way i ever played videogames with my siblings growing up so i wanna do that

tagging @yuriyakuza @numetaljackdog @plushri GO MY TAG GAME MINIONS KILL

[bakery-anon]

omg buggy matchups!!! id love a haikyuu one :] you already know me, tansy (he/it)

my favorite color is yellow, but like sunflower yellow, golden and warm like sunshine yknow

one of my fav hobbies and biggest passions is creating. ive been drawing/writing since i was super young, and take great pride in my work. i find my inspiration in people, usually drawing art of or for those i care ab. im a huge gift giver even tho im broke, so i make instead! art, poems, songs; if its creative ill do it

i collect anything and everything keroppi!!! i love frogs and keroppis my favorite sanrio character. i also collect monster cans, with the goal of trying and owning one of every flavor. sucks when they get discontinued tho… one thing i collect that u actually might not know about is lucky cats! or maneki neko bc im pretentious. its a much smaller collection tho!

my love languages… giving, im a very big gift giver (as mentioned before) and words of affirmation guy. im always there to reassure my partner if they need it and am very vocal with my affection. receiving, i LOVE quality time. spending time with my friends or partner is one of my favorite things to do, even if we’re just coexisting in silence. spending time w loved ones is often like recharging for me

what i want in a partner… someone taller than me, for sure. someone who’s honest, even blunt, with me when i need it. communication and transparency are very important to me. i need someone who trusts that i can handle the truth. someone who can match my energy would be nice, on more than a physical level. i also like people i can back and forth banter with a lot, teasing and all. and nerds… i love nerds….

oughh my favorite trope… i’m a sucker for some forced proximity, as well as unaware mutual pining. two oblivious idiots being forced to confront their feelings for each other bc of their closeness? i eat it up everytime

im excited to see who u pair me with buggy!!! <3

hi tansy!! i love you so much!! i hope you enjoy your matchup hehe it's with!!!!! drumroll please!!!

𝙆𝙪𝙧𝙤𝙤 𝙏𝙚𝙩𝙨𝙪𝙧𝙤

i matched you with kuroo because you wanted someone who was able to be blunt with you and for all his teasing he can be blunt if needed. he can trust that you can handle the truth and won't keep it from you. also i think that forced proximity with you two would be so funny to watch hehe. also he's nerdy and taller than you + bantering back and forth is definitely part of his love language.

Kuroo + Tansy (Tansuroo)

he finds out that your favorite flowers are sunflowers, and he tries to grow some in his backyard and is disappointed when they fail

ends up getting you sunflower bouquets when he finds a flower shop that will do them

definitely feeds into your monster can and keroppi collections. every paycheck he sees a lot of money leave his bank account as he pre-orders a new keroppi plush or gets you a case of the new flavor of monster

he goes a bit overboard in his gift giving but it's because it's something he can do because everything reminds him of you. he finds a piece of you everywhere he looks

definitely a pining mess when he had a crush on you and got made fun of for it by kenma

likes to run his fingers through your hair while he finishes up last minute paperwork on his little tray desk

kuroo can practically feel the money as it leaves his bank account. it's worth it though when he comes through the door with a box and he can see you eye the package. "what's that?"

"a box."

"i can see that, what's in the box dumbass?" you roll your eyes and cross your arms as you get up from the couch.

"it's for you," he hands you the package and when he sees your eyes light up at what you find inside he knows it's worth it. every cent he spends is worth it as long as you keep that smile on your face.

"why are you looking at me like that?"

"can i be cheesy?"

"when are you not? come on bedhead, out with it."

"your smile reminds me of sunflowers." and it does, reminds him of how they grow to face the sun. how he grew to face you, how you remind him of the sun. you with your bright sunflower smiles, and your pencil lead on your hands. sketchbook pages filled with multitudes of things, but also drawings of you two. yeah, every cent is worth it and then some.

our double date!! Tansuroo and Buggykawa date!!! I think our double date is to a museum and it's those two getting into a competition about what the art is classified as, what era it is, or the artist and you correcting them as i laugh in the background. the day ends peacefully at least once you all get tired out then we go for ice cream and it's you and oikawa harassing me in spanish while i don't understand what's going on.

[moyazaika]

Understandable, I’m a sucker for praise and validation when it comes to what I draw. I actually have your reaction to my Red fanart printed and framed on my wall, alongside praises from friends and family 😔

THREE JOBS??? Woah, wanna ask like what you do but also don’t want to invade your privacy, so I’ll just be wondering how you manage three jobs.

I actually resigned last year, on december. Had to continue my studies and my job was draining me. However, I love money and with my new schedule I’m thinking of getting another job. On Halloween, I went as Miles Morales <3 I got his suit, some nice ripped jeans and even did some makeup. Lots of people at work were complimenting my costume and a man even called me Miles. At the end of my shift someone sent me a letter (more like they gave it to my coworker and she gave it to me) and they said they thought I was attractive, giving me their number and saying we could get to know eachother. On the bottom of the letter was something like “By the way, I loved your Gwen Stacy costume” 😭

Honestly I find braces kind of cute, mostly because I’ve had mine for years and I love the different color combinations people do. I’m also a sucker for characters who have the “🤓☝🏽” vibes. I find them quite delightful.

I enjoy having my emotions manipulated by your fics, reminds me why I enjoy reading and every fic is amazing as always so I’m stuck trying to read and focus on different aspects. I enjoy seeing how you enjoy my comments, I’ll keep reminding you of how amazing your fics are.

I remember they already had most of the movie finished but someone said they had to do it again, and if I remember correctly, the scene where the spiderpeople were running after Miles took almost 2 years or something, don’t know if I’m right. :(( I feel awful for the people working on it. I think there’s also a Miles Morales Live action movie planned, can’t remember when, but it was a plan for the MCU. Still, I crave the beautiful animation Spiderverse gave me, AND I NEED ANSWERS. 😭

Happy valentine’s day Genie, sending you lots of hugs and positive vibes <3 In Mexico, it's common to surprise someone late at night with a mariachi band playing love songs (can be any song, but its usually love songs) outside their house. Sleep with one eye open, I’ve already sent the mariachis /j ❤️‍🩹

exactlyyyy it’s so human to want to feel appreciated and receive praise for your art and im a little tired of this new narrative being pushed where people insist you should be okay with making art or writing without getting anything in return for it, as if it’s not a passion or hobby that holds any worth?? and therefore it’s expected to just be churned out without hope of recognition or compliments???

Anyways. never feel bad about wanting validation when it comes to what u draw :)

Yeahhhh i just came home from a shift and thought id answer asks. i work at two tutoring places and as a receptionist at a dental clinic. its a lot better than a lot of retail and fast food jobs so im really happy and grateful with my routine rn :’) oh good luck with the job search! Hope something works out soon ❤️‍🩹 AWWW that’s really sweet even if they mixed up your costume lollllolol, did anything come out of that exchange?

Aw thank youuu :’) 🩷🩷🩷

I know the movies are such a labour of love and they invest so much time and effort into the beautiful animation and story and I love that i feel like i grew up with miles throughout the last few years, but also the fact that im gonna be done with my masters (fingers fuckin crossed) and in the job market by the time the next one comes out is. Something. For sure. LOL

I hope your Valentine’s Day was one to remember. That’s such a lovely tradition oh my goddd but hello?? im still waiting up for the mariachi band??? where are they????? 🤨🤨

[italianpawg]

do you actually like ur husband & if u don’t can u not leave him ??

hey sorry i didn't get to this yet i was making dinner when u sent it last night and i dont get much time to myself.

so like. im not sure what depth of honesty you're expecting so i dont know how to answer this actually. its complicated, on both accounts.

i was a completely different person when i decided to move here 3 years ago. i was seeking adventure and boy did i get it! but my frontal lobe was underdeveloped, i was desperate to be loved, had nothing to lose, and of course i was in love with him. i still am, somehow.

i think it's moreso that he literally wants nothing to do with me. he is not attracted to me. he puts a pillow between us at night. i genuinely think he doesn't like me or love me. he likes having me around to make his life more comfortable - feeding him, doing household chores, listening to his rants. aside from paying our rent he doesn't help me with anything and he's not interested in me as a person. there's zero affection, he refuses to do things with me or really do anything outside of his strict personal routine (99% sure he has undiagnosed autism but he refuses to accept this) and yeah if anyone was curious he does hit me sometimes im not joking about that. that's life!!

i should stop myself ahead of this tangent bc i could go on. he has his share of flaws and annoying habits but i'm not certainly perfect either. i just wish he was nicer to the woman he claims to love.

in regards to taking action to dissolve this (dumping his sorry ass) i'm not dissing your level of maturity here when i say im guessing you've never been married. 'leaving' is reeeally not that simple, logistically or emotionally. it'd be way easier if we were just dating but marriage is a binding legal contract. again i dont mean to sound condescending it's just more complicated than many would assume.

plus, as you may or may not know, i immigrated from the US to australia to be with him. might sound unwise but at first it wasn't, i saved up plenty of money to fund my move and establish myself here, i did everything the right way, and i'm still waiting on immigration to process my visa after nearly 3 years. that's not really something you can just hit undo on. it's not like i just moved across town into his place, i moved across the literal planet.

financially i have nothing to my name and he doesn't have much more. the economy is really bad here. i did get a job but i havent started getting paid yet, even when i do it's only one shift a week. he, in combination with mental illness, has isolated me from having a support system. i have no friends, no confidence, no safe haven. my family can’t help. (1. they dont have much themselves 2. they’ve done enough already 3. my mom is my closest family member and she thinks he’s an angel so that’s not happening.)

money (or lack thereof) is definitely a factor but even if i had it i can't just up and break my lease on our apartment. we also have a cat who is like our child and i really do not want to leave her. cats do indeed have feelings and form close bonds with their people and i couldn't break her little heart like that.

plus australia’s divorce laws are utter bullshit!!! you have to be officially separated and living separately for a whole year in order to file for divorce. not to mention well he’s basically threatened to either end himself or live out the rest of his life wallowing in misery if i ever leave him. i can’t have that on my back. i’m fucked. basically i’m fucked!!!

ultimately it is what it is. i just wish he would like beat the shit out of me once and for all so that i had undeniable physical evidence. i mean, he does that, but not in a way that anyone would notice. even if he did... i don't leave the house enough to anyone to notice/care.

i've kinda given up on having a fulfilling relationship or expecting better from him. instead i'm trying to seek happiness through self initiated means. hobbies and stuff. self-improvement.

the hardest part is knowing that i want a family - most who do start by my age - but he would make a terrible father, and the longer i wait, the less time i have to find anyone else who would be a decent parent. torturous position to be in. but i got myself here didn't i.

[youremyheaven]

I don’t think all venusians are bad but I also had a share of bad experiences with them. I don’t know if I should drag the women or the men first. I’d talk about the women first because they’re in my family and it’s a more neutral point of view than hate or a one time experience. My purva ashada stellium grandmother used to starve her children too and is extremely cheap. Tbh I don’t think she has a bad relationship with her daughters. She seems to get along with them pretty well. However my mom who’s purva phalguni moon has similar behavior as the previous ano. She’s very jealous and envious of other women constantly comparing herself to other women and she needs to be the “best looking” among others. Otherwise she lose her mind. She’s very image conscious and she’s a complete different person with strangers or my friends. She wants to be seen as the cool mom. She also assumes every single man she interacts with has some sort of romantic interest in her. She also says phrases like “you’ll never be as attractive as used to be” like even if It was true and I was a walking troll she shouldn’t be saying this to her daughter ? I also find it weird how every single Venusian woman I talk to is extremely fake ? Like they’re obsessed with status and want to be seen as higher or richer than what they actually are. They love to see people beneath them. They strive to be the best in that way. They’re very superficial and they would definitely befriend someone or be around someone for the aesthetic or for what they could get from them. They would take shamelessly from people without giving back and when you called them out they be like “I didn’t ask you to” when they truly did pressure you into it. I think for men, most Venusian men I met, they would be very polite, kind helpful and try to please me as much as possible. Like they would get interested in my hobbies and try to get close to me with some hidden intention or purpose to it. When I don’t get fooled by their act, it’s almost as their mask drops and I see another version of them that is much cruel and mean ? It’s like they want to “punish” you. They would paint themselves as the victim because you didn’t give them what they wanted or desired from you. Whatever that is. They would tarnish your reputation or come for you in settings. Now, I don’t think I had many Venusian friends (only 2 ) that are woman but they both would lie and act as if they’re “rich” even if they’re not and I already know they’re not and I don’t even care because I never bring such things up.

💀💀💀u have described so many people i know, its crazyyy,, one girl i went to college with who had Saturn in Bharani atmakaraka was just like u described. she was upper middle class at best but she wanted to be seen as rich so bad?? she'd insert random details to make herself sound 🤑🤑she spoke about how much she spent on clothes even tho she always wore the same stuff on repetition?? (im not being a hater, her comments always just made no sense??) she'd talk about how her family only fed their dog specially bought meat and it was just ??? i hated the way she spoke about money and same goes for another Venusian girlie i know, she wont shut up about money and always exaggerates for good effect?? its so cringe to me ngl. theyre also the type of people who want to put others down to feel better about themselves. I think Venusians in general don't like it when someone tries to imply that they're on the same "level" so they always put others down to establish superiority. every Venusian woman I know is arrogant and conceited in some ways. one time the atmakaraka chick told me that her dad bought her a new car and i was like ok good for you? and she always spoke about how its her car when it was actually just a new car for the fam after they disposed off the old one?? lol?

one time my friends and i were eating out and a really cute kid (5-6 yr old girl) and her mom came in, all my friends said that the kid resembled me quite a bit and the Bharani ak girl said "yeah she's chubby like you" 🤡🤡🤡first of all the kid wasn't "chubby" by a long shot, and even if she was who tf says that about a 5yr old??? she just wanted to establish dominance? and did not like the fact that others thought we resembled each other lmao?? what a complete asshole, imagine insulting a literal child and your friend?? Venusian women do not like it when other women seem to have the upper hand in any way. They are not girls girls, i have said this before and i'll say it again Venusians are the OG "im not like other girls" girl.

im so sorry you went through all that anon. i wish you healing and peace<3