#im not even that far into it but the scene was so clear in front of my minds eye dass ich es komplett ausschleifen musste | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

awrkive · 4 months ago

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THE LOVE PROGNOSIS, fin. — JJK (m.)

for as long as you can remember, you’ve always been a hopeless romantic.

the girl who’s always dreamt of cheesy encounters with her soulmate, grand love declarations, and a cute little beach wedding to boot. but reality pretty much slaps you hard right on the face, because love, unfortunately, doesn’t come grand — it’s simple and it’s quiet, but it is quite painful, especially when the love that you’ve been seeking for all your adult life has just been right under your nose all this time.

PAIRING jungkook x female reader // mingyu x female reader

GENRE r18+ (angst, fluff, smut) MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

CHAPTER WORD COUNT 43.2k idcccccc atp😭 take ur time!

CHAPTER WARNINGS/MISC medical!au, roommates!au, surgeon!jk, surgeon!reader (they are both 4th year residents and are co-workers), corporate lawyer!mingyu, oc and jk are bffs since med school but their love language is fighting each other <3, jk and mingyu are bffs during undergrad, hopeless romantic!oc. dont read further warnings if u dont wanna be spoiled: ANGST. im aware i kinda overkilled it here but uh.. hear me out! explicit sexual content [ male mast*rbation, oral s*x (f&m receiving), making out, dry h*mping, penetr*tive s*x (protected and unprotected, missionary, cowgirl, doggy, spooning), a bit of c*mplay, jk <3 boobs, ily kink (redacted) cries during sex lol ]. FLUFFy fluff fluffff 😖 some of the scenes give very much like 2000s romcom vibes but idc sue me also theres a #merder reference ifykyk

NOTES we have finally reached the end! sorry it took me a month to get this out sjdfhd but its here and its long as fuck n im so proud of this and happy that i finished a series!! for once!!! will always love my silly tlp couple and the characters 🥹 let me know ur thoughts on my inbox oki and circulate by liking and reblogging if u enjoyed reading hihi ty ok bye enjoy reading!🫵🏼🫵🏼 [ important: pls make sure to read the note below ]

[ SERIES MASTERLIST ] // [ MAIN MASTERLIST ]

A day passed since the fiasco at the villa happened and Jungkook and you have acted like total strangers since then. The rest of your friends easily took notice of it; the silence between you two on the ride to the airport, the not-so discreet way you avoided each other at the waiting area, even going as far as exchanging seats inside the plane when on any other day, you two didn’t mind being close together physically.

Jungkook knows absolutely that the avoidance is doing you both a disservice. You’re both grown adults and going to extreme lengths to ignore each other – like not even looking at the other when you bump in the hospital hallways – is a one-way ticket to your relationship’s foundations crumbling.

That thought terrified Jungkook so much that he decided to come clean tonight. Talk to you properly when his mind is cleared and there was no Mingyu to aggravate his thoughts and project actions he’s not necessarily proud of – because the fight was juvenile, he knows that. Him committing and giving in to violence is not something he wants you to see, no matter the context. You were right when you said that was not him, and Jungkook can’t have you thinking otherwise.

When he steps in front of your apartment door, he thinks if you’re already there. He isn’t entirely sure. You two haven’t seen each other at the hospital and you haven’t been texting him either. You might still be doing your rounds, he thought, but when he opens the door to your unit and trudges his feet to the living room, he catches a sight of you going out from your bedroom.

The two of you freeze upon seeing each other, but Jungkook’s surprise soon turns into confusion when he notices the carry-on luggage in your hand.

“Oh, you’re here,” You utter, filling the silence in the air. “I was just going.”

“Where?” Jungkook instantly asks, taking you both by surprise.

But you quickly recover. You give him a small smile – but what Jungkook clearly sees is a wince.

“I’m going over to my sister’s,” You must’ve seen the way Jungkook’s boring holes at your pink luggage, and so you take a glance at it momentarily, tugging on the handle to scoot it over closer to your side. You clear your throat. “I’m staying there for a while.”

Jungkook feels a certain weight drop on his shoulders, his lips parting at your declaration.

“__, i-if this is about what I said, you don’t have to leave—”

You cut him off quickly. “No. It’s not that. I just… I just need some time away.”

Even though he doesn’t like the implication, he gets you.

Blinking, he thinks what to say next. Jungkook doesn’t want to say the wrong words – he’s well aware of the fact that he's put his foot in his mouth back at the resort, and he’s not fucking up the second time around.

While he intended to talk to you tonight to address the elephant between you two, he also understands completely why you need time for yourself. It was too much. He told you a lot of things and he can’t expect you to process all of them in a single day.

So, he nods, still stricken, heart heavy when he looks at you again. “Okay.”

“Okay.” You repeat, voice a little louder than him. A pregnant pause, and you’re pulling up the handle of your luggage again, the wheels gliding on the floorboards as you begin to head towards the door to your apartment.

Jungkook doesn’t mean to sound so alarmed when he suddenly blurts out, “Now?”

He doesn’t even know why. It was the obvious. You’ve packed your things – you’re heading out. But he couldn’t stop himself. It’s like there’s a sense of fear clouding his mind the more this moment of you leaving stretches out further.

You stop on your tracks, blinking at him. “Y-yeah?”

“Oh.” Jungkook feels his hand itching to do something. Something stupid like grab your wrist gently to make you stay.

But he knows that’s futile. He doesn’t have the right to make you stay if you don’t want to in the first place.

“Seokjin’s actually coming in a few minutes,” you tell him, glancing at your phone. “My sister’s still at work, so she made him pick me up.”

Jungkook can only give you a nod.

It makes sense for your brother-in-law to come pick you up. It also makes sense for you to stay over their place considering that their apartment isn’t that far from the hospital and you won’t have a hard time commuting to work if you planned to stay there for a little while.

He wonders, though, why you aren’t staying at Doyeon’s instead… he doesn’t know if you’ve talked already, but from what it seems, you aren’t talking to the rest of your friends, either; judging by the way he hasn’t seen you together with any of them at the hospital. Taehyung had suggested that maybe you just need time, to which Doyeon and Nayeon agreed to. Jungkook can’t help but feel bad, though. You’re seemingly coming out isolated at the end of his own doing. If you’re avoiding your friends just because of him, that would be extremely unfair to you. Taehyung, Doyeon and Nayeon are just as much as your friends as they are his, and during these times, you should feel comfortable taking solace in their friendship like how he’s leaning on them currently.

Guilt washes over him at the thought. He can’t bear thinking about you hurting in the process of all of this. He just wants so badly to make it up to you, for you both to be okay again. You didn’t even have to acknowledge what he said – about him being in love with you. You could totally ignore it and act like it never happened, go on about your days like nothing changed as long as you’re by his side.

It hurts. It hurts that even when you’re just physically within his reach right now, he can’t seem to get a hold of you. And he has no one to blame but himself.

A phone rings and Jungkook watches as you fish out your device from your pockets.

“Must be Jin.” you say, picking up the call. You exchange a few words with your brother-in-law for a few seconds before hanging up and looking at him again. “He’s outside already.”

Jungkook nods, biting back the words that consist of something stupid like “don’t leave”.

“Your car…?” He hesitates, remembering how you’d drive to work.

“It broke again yesterday. I’m actually… uh… thinking of just selling it. Get it over with.”

Your car. You mentioned your parents have turned it over to you during your junior year in college. It always broke in the most inconvenient times – like the one time you had a bad date, and you panicked-texted him about the car towing company not picking up. It was a Sunday and Jungkook was supposed to go over some paper works, but he scrambled out of his room to get you – and he didn’t regret it one bit because you were actually crying the moment he arrived. You had been overstimulated, what with another failed date and your broken car – it was all too much. And you just needed Jungkook to be there. You told him so.

Jungkook cherishes those moments a lot. Not because you cried in them – he always felt like it was a punch to the gut whenever he sees you even an ounce of upset – but because it tells him that you trust him with that vulnerable side of you. It means he’s important enough to you to let him in your life. It’s one of those moments where Jungkook truly steps back to reevaluate your relationship – because sure, it could be merely friendship to anybody, but Jungkook doesn’t really think so. Your bond runs deeper than friendship, and he doesn’t even mean romantic. It’s the… camaraderie. The partnership.

He could’ve confessed a long time ago – that’s what people kept saying, but what they don’t know is that he has so much to lose. You are more than just the woman he would love to kiss and make love to or call his girlfriend – you’re the love of his life, you’re everything to him. And if he can’t have you in any way, he’d truly break.

And now that everything’s said and done – with him finally baring his truth to you – it’s come to this.

You, leaving.

The silence that follows pricks Jungkook’s skin like needles, and the creak of your steps on the floorboards ring in his ears – a daunting harsh whisper of your farewell – although it’s just temporary.

But something worries him.

What if it’s not temporary? What if during your stay at your sister’s place, you decide to completely get rid of his company for the good and better?

It’s all those frantic thoughts that urges him to call your name, but he doesn’t expect your voice overlapping with his as you say his name at the same time.

Jungkook’s lips curl up slightly. “What is it?”

Predictably, you wave your hand at him. “No, you first.”

“It’s okay.”

Your hand hovers over the handle of your suitcase as you pass by him, stopping on the threshold of your apartment. “I just…” you trail off. You look at Jungkook for a moment. “I just wanted to say bye. And uh… that… I drank all your banana milk in the fridge. But I’ll wire you the money later. Or buy you another batch and I’ll give it to you at the hospital or—”

Jungkook cuts you off by calling out your name, broken by a laugh of amusement. His first smile today, maybe. You look at him wide-eyed. It’s fascinating the way you have him completely wrapped around your finger and you’re not even doing anything.

“It’s fine. You don’t need to wire me anything.”

“Oh... well, I’m still sorry.” He nods, giving you a small smile. “What was it you wanted to tell me, then?”

Right now, he forgets what it was even all about. “Just, uh, please tell your sister and Seokjin hyung I said hi.”

Jungkook doesn’t want to delude himself into thinking that your face flashed a look of disappointment for the briefest moment after he said the words. At the back of his mind, he thinks you were expecting more – but he knows he’s reaching, grasping for straws, and he’s just desperate for anything from you he can’t really rationalize his line of thinking.

So with a final wave of your hand – a bit timid – you turn around and open the door to your unit, and Jungkook watches as your form disappears completely, leaving him stoned in his position in the middle of the living room for a long time; head empty, body numb, until he gathers time to collect himself and finally move over to the bathroom, where he takes a cold shower in hopes for an improved mood.

It didn’t really do anything, and he found himself having a hard time sleeping – waking up randomly during the wee hours of the morning.

When he stirs awake from his blaring alarm at 5:30, he’s nothing but adrift.

It feels weird when he goes to the kitchen and he doesn’t see you, as he expects you to be there in whatever worn up shirt from high school you still have, making toast or some quick breakfast – with your playlist playing from your phone – but you weren’t.

And Jungkook remembers that would be the case for another few days to come. Something he has to be okay with.

For the meantime.

He hopes.

Jungkook doesn’t get drunk often, but now, his friends are assuming he is. For the record, though, he is not drunk and they are just exaggerating. Sure, he’s staggering and he’s mixing up his syllables and grammar – but he swears he just feels a little woozy.

“Jungkook,” Doyeon calls him, laughing a bit. “Come on, Taehyung’s driving you home.”

“Don’t want to,” He says as he takes another swig of his fifth canned beer he’s been consuming since they all arrived at the barbecue place. “I can handle my alcohol.”

Which — fair. That’s not new news. But still—

“No shit, you have a shift tomorrow at eleven in the morning. Don’t be stubborn. It’s time to go home.”

“It’s fine, I’ll Uber back.”

Jungkook watches as Doyeon rolls her eyes.

“Are you really moping right now?”

He sends her a glare – one that she predictably does not take seriously. “‘M not moping. You’re moping.”

“And I’m Kate Bush. Taehyung, can you just drag Jungkook out of here? I think he’s gonna cry any minute now and the auntie is closing. We gotta go.” Nayeon butts in, and even though her words may seem harsh around the edges, she looks at Jungkook with a concerned gaze. The playful atmosphere from earlier now dissipating.

Jungkook appreciates the warmth that he gets from Nayeon’s gentle approach to everything – but right now, all it does is make him feel pitiful. Doyeon’s right. He is moping. Moping for something that should’ve been within his control in the first place.

“Man, you know you bench way more than me. I can’t carry you out all by myself if you’re all drunk and shit.” Taehyung nudges him on the shoulder, enough to make Jungkook move from his seat. He only grumbles.

Doyeon sighs. “What do you want, Jungkook? Call __? Tell her you’re getting wasted and come pick you up?”

Jungkook visibly flinches at the mention of you.

Ever since they arrived at the restaurant, Jungkook has noticed that his friends have been deliberately omitting your name in the conversation – until now, anyway. He thinks they all planned this spontaneous hang to “cheer him up” or whatever the fuck Taehyung said on their way here – which seemed like a slip-up, because Doyeon had hit the back of his head lightly right after saying it.

They’re walking on eggshells around him like he’s some kind of house of cards – one nudge and a blow and he comes crumbling down.

Jungkook hates getting doted on like this. It’s not like you two broke up. They just knew that you went to stay at your sister’s place for a while and you never said when you’re coming back. He hasn’t had any encounters with you at the hospital nowadays – you’re getting good at hiding from him and the rest of the gang, and every single day bleeds into countless sleepless nights. You’ve been gone for five days; no calls, or at least a text. And it seems like you deactivated your IG. You aren’t tweeting or reblogging shit on Twitter as well. You’ve gone completely silent – and with every waking moment that Jungkook spends a day without your presence, it feels like you’re slowly slipping through his fingers.

“No.” he glares at the three of them. Standing up, he feels his vision dancing at the sudden action.

Well. Maybe he is sort of drunk. A little.

“Hey, man, let’s go.” Taehyung ushers once again. This time, Jungkook acquiesces but with a groan. Nonetheless, he lets Taehyung wrap his arm around him to prevent him from tripping on his own feet.

When Jungkook manages to stand firm on the ground, he shuts his eyes tight to get a hold of himself and once again look at Doyeon and Nayeon who are still sitting by the table. With a confused expression, he asks, “Thought we’re all going?”

“Minhyuk will pick me up.” Nayeon says. Jungkook nods, directing his gaze to Doyeon.

“Somebody’s picking me up, too,” When Jungkook squints his eyes at her, she rolls her eyes. “Don’t start. Tae, drive safely, okay? You didn’t drink, right?”

Taehyung shakes his head and gives both women a reassuring nod before they head out of the building when goodbyes were bid, with Taehyung still pressing a hand on Jungkook’s back because he’s still a bit unstable on his feet. It’s not bad, though, Jungkook doesn’t think so. He just feels dizzy and shit, but it’s not anything water can’t solve.

Fuck, now he wants to get in bed as soon as possible. After a cold shower.

“Sorry, man.” he says as he plops down on the passenger’s seat, buckling the seatbelt around himself.

Taehyung comfortably settles on the driver’s seat, adjusting the rearview mirror a bit before starting the engine. But not after he responded to Jungkook with a snort, “It’s fine.”

It’s a quiet car ride and Jungkook can already feel his eyelids threatening to fall, the haze of sleep already clouding his mind. He can’t recall how far it takes from the restaurant to his complex, but soon enough, Taehyung’s voice wakes him up from his stupor.

“You okay there?”

Jungkook hums, leaning back to relax his nerves. A minute flies and he sighs loudly, making Taehyung look at him momentarily.

“Don’t sleep on me. Again, I am not willing to carry you all the way to your apartment, fucker.”

That makes Jungkook laugh, a snicker escaping past his lips. It makes Taehyung do the same, scoffing at his friend as he did so. The car ride continues into a stretched-out comfortable silence before Taehyung breaks it with a question of, “You two still haven’t talked?”

Jungkook stiffens at the mention, and he knows his friend notices the way he did, but he quickly tries to shake it off. “Yeah. She’s still at her sister’s.” Taehyung nods. When Jungkook looks at him, he decides to ask, “What ‘bout you? She reached out yet?”

“No.”

Jungkook inhales a sharp breath.

This is bad. You’re ignoring all your friends because of him.

“Sorry.” Jungkook says after a pregnant pause.

“What for?”

“Dunno. Feels like it’s all my fault,” a sigh escapes past his lips again. “You guys don’t deserve to get caught up in this.”

“Jungkook,” There’s a lilt to Taehyung’s voice that reminds Jungkook again that the man beside him is older than he is and sometimes, Taehyung can be way more mature, almost like an older brother. He forgets their age difference most of the time. “Don’t say that. __ just needs her time. She’ll come around.”

The smile Jungkook gives his way is bitter but it’s a smile, nonetheless.

“I don’t know, Tae,” He leans his head back on the seat, staring at nothing in particular. “It’s different this time.”

“You’ve fought before,” Taehyung points out. “How is this different?”

Jungkook does know what he’s trying to point out. He may be referring to the time in third year of med school when you didn’t talk to him for a month – but still. This, right now – whatever is happening – is far from what happened back then.

“Just different,” He shrugs, a poor attempt at nonchalance so Taehyung doesn’t think he’s being pathetic. “I feel like this is it.” Taehyung looks at him curiously when the red light turns on. It makes Jungkook squirm, but he voices out what he feels, anyway. “I’m losing her.”

That felt weird the moment it slips his tongue. For the past few days, it’s been in his head – making up the mess of his thoughts. When he said that, for once, it felt like finality. Like its verbalization actually made it real.

He does feel like he’s losing you. And it feels like the absolute truth.

“You can’t say that when you haven’t even talked to her, Jungkook,” Taehyung says and he says it so firmly. When Jungkook studies the older guy’s face, it’s etched with sincerity, especially when he adds, “Do you really think she’ll let go of an almost decade-long relationship just because of what happened? Frankly speaking, even if she does not feel the same way about you at all, I know her enough to know that she’ll have at least the decency to let you down properly. I think she’s just trying to think all of this through. She’ll talk when her head’s clear.”

Jungkook finds himself processing his words. You are exactly like that. You’re the type of person to need your personal space when you’re confronted by huge predicaments. When he thinks about it – you have so much on your plate. Mingyu, him, your relationship with each of them; Jungkook realizes things must be so hard for you right now, both emotionally and physically. And you’re dealing with all this while still showing up for your rotations.

“You’re right.” Jungkook whispers.

“Just… time, okay? You both need time.” Taehyung says and for once, Jungkook smiles a genuine one.

The light turns green, and Taehyung continues to drive.

Taehyung decided to turn up his jazz playlist and it eased Jungkook’s mind a bit. But it did lull him to sleep all the way to his apartment complex. Thankfully though, it only took Taehyung a few seconds of nudging him before he stirred awake, disoriented when he opened his eyes only to hear his friend say they were already there, ushering him out of his car.

He said his thanks to Taehyung, and his friend made sure to tell him to take it easy before he took off. When he was gone, Jungkook went straight to the elevator to press his floor, mind and body working on autopilot as he sauntered over the hallway to stop in front of his unit.

When the door opens, he feels a sense of calmness at the sight of his own place with everything at his disposal including the bathroom that he quickly head towards, not hesitating to strip himself naked on the way to the shower, letting his clothes form a heap on the threshold; bare and naked without a care in the world.

Stepping into the shower box, he turns the showerhead on, hissing at the cold water spraying onto his skin. He needed the cold to get rid of his sluggishness – and it works just as instantly as he’d hoped.

Both of his hands shoot up to brush his hair off his forehead, and he stays in that position for awhile; with the water running on his body and his head leaned back a bit, eyes closed as he relaxes.

He mindlessly reaches for his shampoo bottle, but when he opens the cap, he smells a completely different product. What welcomes him when he opens his eyes back again is the familiar sight of Bath and Body works bottle. Your water lily springs body wash.

Despite his current headspace, it brings a smile to Jungkook’s lips.

Right.

He’s noticed in the past few days that you left it in your shared bathroom. Considering all the things that you still have around the apartment, it didn’t really look like you packed a lot of things when you left – which should ease Jungkook’s mind. Still, though; the small size of your luggage and the quantity of what you brought with you do not matter when you still aren’t home.

And with that, Jungkook feels himself slipping back into… mulling again. And he can’t help but heave out a sigh.

He just… wants to rest for tonight. Just wants his head emptied out. Relax. He feels like he’s been on edge for the longest of time and he just needs some sort of – he’s not sure – comfort? Maybe something along the lines?

And as if his hand has a mind on its own, he grips the bottle of your body wash and squirts an ample amount on his palm, the scent of water lily springs surrounding the confined space of the shower immediately.

He lathers it all over his chest, inhaling the gentle waft and how it weirdly calms him from the inside. The room smells just like you. He smells just like you. And it isn’t the first time he’s doing this – he’s always liked the way you smelled, and he may have used your body wash by accident countless of times. Jungkook sometimes does it just to tease you – because you always point it out when you notice that he smells the same, and then you get all irritated and it makes Jungkook keen because you’re just so goddamn cute when you glare at him and when you get mean. Teasing you also means that you’d get mad enough to sulk at him, and that gives him the opportunity to make it up to you; and making it up to you means he gets all of your attention.

It’s pathetic but Jungkook’s not ashamed to admit that – just to himself, though. He likes when you give him attention, can you blame him?

His mind goes back to the memory of you cuddling with him on the ground at that random playground near your complex, how you snuggled up to his arm, giggling and threatening him to stop using your body wash. He remembers all the times you would cook together on nights when you’re both free – lounging on the couch mindlessly, either watching a show and debating over useless, stupid stuff – or when you would force him to rub your foot or massage your neck. Jungkook doesn’t relent until after you complain for a good five minutes. He’s gotten better at pretending overtime that he doesn’t look forward to touching any part of you.

At that thought, he recalls the way your back felt on his hands when he rubbed sunscreen all over it when you were at the resort. How the plane of your gorgeous skin felt so smooth to the touch, how you make him feel even with just the slightest baring of your skin.

Jungkook shuts his close when his mind goes into overdrive.

You. You. You and your bikini. You and your short shorts that might as well just be panties in disguise. You and those cute little, tight camisoles you always wear around the apartment. How he could just sometimes see the outline of your nipples where the thin material of your shirt clings to. How your bare legs look so good when you cross them while reading the paper on a Sunday morning by the kitchen island. How your breasts look like they could fit in Jungkook’s big palms with a bit of overspill – enough to drive him insane.

These are the thoughts in Jungkook’s head as he continues to lather the liquidy texture of your body wash all over his body – and when his hand finally nudges the dick in between his legs, he groans.

He’s not a stranger to getting off to the thought of you – you’re a gorgeous woman and it doesn’t really help the fact that he’s been in love with you for god knows how long – but it doesn’t mean that he does it guilt-free. He almost always feels like shit afterwards.

But he can’t help it. Not when you’re all over his head again. Not when he’s thinking about how good it would probably fucking feel if he could just have a taste of your plump lips. How it would feel if he could just suck on your neck, paint you with his love there, down to your cleavage then play with both of your tits with his hands – be greedy with it – get your nipples rock hard and pretty tight for him, suck and latch and nip and lick them, make sure it’s all wet before he goes down more south.

God. He thinks about it all the time. How’d it feel to go down on you. You’re so fucking pretty he could just imagine how gorgeous you would look down there, too. Were you the type to like getting eaten out? Jungkook hopes so. Because he would do everything to satisfy you. Fuck, he’d be so good to you. He’d tease your clit with his thumb first and you’d tell him that you’re aching for him bad – and he’d cave in and get his first taste with the flat of his tongue and fuck. You probably taste so good he’d crave it for days to come.

The next thing Jungkook knows, he’s holding the base of his cock firmly, feeling it getting harder every second. It grows in his hand as he continues to think about eating your pussy, imagining the sounds you’d let out, how you’d look extra beautiful getting fucked by his tongue. Shit. He’d do it so well if you just asked.

Jungkook traps his bottom lip with his teeth as he starts teasing his own cock, already in its full mass, hard and standing tall against his abdomen. He can see the shiny texture of his tip, precum leaking out, begging to be touched. He doesn’t wait any second to thumb the liquid off his head, letting out a half-sigh, half-hiss at how sensitive it felt, especially when he runs it over the veiny base.

Inhaling a sharp breath, Jungkook steps back a bit to cup his balls, squeezing it just enough to make him close his eyes. He repeats the motion of sliding his hand up and down his erect cock, feeling himself getting wetter at every second that passes.

He gets a picture of you on your knees, and as he pumps himself at a slow pace, he imagines it’s you instead kneading him. You have slender fingers and pretty nails, it would feel so much better if they were wrapped around his cock right now. Your nails would scrape against his length, and you’ve held hands enough times for Jungkook to know that his hand is significantly bigger than yours, so you probably won’t fit all of him in your hand – but that’s alright. You’d tease him on the tip instead, spread his precum all over, get him needing and wanting more.

Jungkook’s hips start to buck as he speeds up his pace, this time jacking himself harder as his mind jumps to more thoughts of you — but this time around, you’re not on your knees: you’re pressed on the glass wall of the shower box, your ass bent for all of him to caress and squeeze, and you’re craning your head to look at him with hooded eyes, lips parted into a gorgeous “o” as you beckon him to come closer and put his hard dick in your warm, tight, and aching pussy.

“Fuck.” Jungkook curses as he lets his forehead fall to the wall, resting there for a few good seconds, other hand scrambling to turn off the shower and quickly shutting his eyes close as he pictures himself thrusting into you instead of his stupid fucking hand.

“Shit, shit, shit—” He hisses, hand going faster around his length, pumping himself desperately to the thought of his dick sliding in and out of you.

Your moans would fill the tight room, and you’d sound so pretty. You’d be so pliant against the strong arm that he would wrap you with — and Jungkook would make sure to flick your nipples and fondle your breasts as he pounds into you from behind.

“Fuuuuck…”

He grunts and he moans, hand impossibly going faster — dick getting harder. He just wants a release. He wants to cum so bad — to kiss you and love you and have you say it back with the same earnestness as him.

Jungkook wants so badly to have you in his arms right after he eats you out, to cuddle with you and pretend like you have all the time in the world after he’s made sure to make love to every single inch of your body. To caress your hair and press a kiss on your head anytime he likes – because he’s allowed to. Because you love him. He just wants to be able to touch you in any way possible. Run his fingers over your back, kiss your cheeks, and your scrunched nose. Just wants to bury his face in your chest after a long day at work. Hold you tight against him. Have you close to him, whenever and wherever.

But he doesn’t have all that. He can’t have all that. Not when you don’t even feel the same. Not when you reacted that way when he told you he loves you more than just his best friend.

“I’m sorry, but I just can’t wrap my head around it. You’re not telling me the whole truth and frankly, I don’t believe you.”

Your words ring in his ears as he continues to jack himself.

The memory is still so vivid in his head — the surprised look on your face — certainly not the pleasant one. You were so… surprised. And angry. Like you didn’t believe any of what he said. Like you were trying hard to convince yourself that whatever you were hearing from him wasn’t true.

Because she doesn’t feel the same way. Jungkook thinks.

He remembers the night you left. How you could barely look him in the eyes.

“Shit—” Jungkook hisses as he squeezes his balls, hand pumping faster around his swollen cock. He closes his eyes as he tries to regulate his breathing, his stomach tightening at his impending release – and it’s the last thing he does in favor of his own sanity before his mind slips back again to life without you in it.

He would never have you. He can never be anything to you anymore.

He will never be, especially as he looks down at his hand on his cock.

How pathetic.

What would you think if you were to see him right now, getting himself off by imagining it’s you instead? You’d be so disgusted. You’d look at him like he’s a different person and feel betrayed because – how could the person you trust think about you like this?

There’s that sense of self-hatred again that Jungkook feels whenever he jacks off to you. That fear of you finding out and not liking it.

Jungkook tugs at his cock angrily as he thinks about all that, and he doesn’t notice that the stinging in the sides of his eyes would soon turn into tears running down his cheeks as he tries to reach his climax.

You would hate him so much. You don’t even like him anymore. Don’t even want to live with him anymore.

But he just wants to cum so bad. Just wants to feel some sort of clarity. Delude himself into basking in that quick dopamine.

He traps a sob in his throat as he makes quick work of his cock, and with one last squeeze around his tight balls, he shoots his hot cum to the wall, hips bucking at his orgasm.

Letting out a series of hushed curses, Jungkook continues to pump his cock for more until he feels sensitive, and his dick turns soft and languid against his legs.

He grabs the shower head to spray the cum off the wall, feeling the water already turning lukewarm. When he finishes cleaning his mess up, he grabs your body wash and exits the shower, throwing the bottle in the trash can with haste as if it burned him. As he turns back around, he catches sight of himself over the lavatory’s mirror.

There are dark circles under his eyes — not too visible — but they’re there. His eyes are red from crying, and suddenly his body itches. He should shower again and actually clean up this time.

But Jungkook realizes as he stares at himself again… he has never looked so tired. Not even in med school. Or during internship.

This whole thing is taking a toll on him – he knows that well by now. Even his friends do as well. He’s fucking up his sleeping schedule and he’s not even eating properly. He hits the gym not because he wants to but because it helps shut down his head.

Jungkook sighs.

He’s long accepted that the love he holds for you is so big it sometimes borders on piteous. He’s spent so many years going into this kind of phase where he just mulls over the same thing; that he loves you, but you will never ever feel the same way back.

And the thing is, he's always been okay with it. Jungkook loves loving you. He’d be a fool not to when he genuinely thinks that you were made to be loved.

But at this point, he just feels… tired.

Exhausted. Empty.

He wants to sleep. He wants to rest. He wants to wake up the next day and not feel like shit anymore.

Maybe Doyeon was right back at the villa.

It is time to move on.

And maybe… just maybe… unlike all the other times he’s attempted to do the same thing, this time around will be successful.

Your 7am to 2pm shift had just concluded when you arrived at your sister’s place, only to see them both all dolled up, ready to go out.

They told you that you could come with them if you liked, but of course you refused. You’re not the type to interrupt a date and they were certainly too in love for your liking. Don’t get you wrong, you love that for both – but you’re getting pretty sick of romance these days and you’re trying to avoid it as much as possible. Seokjin made sure to throw another one of his “Don’t mope around, okay? We have Macallan in the cupboards. You know the one.” jokes, though – having already known why you’re here in the first place – and your sister pinched his ear painfully enough for you to ignore and roll your eyes at him lightheartedly.

Which leads you to now, binge-eating a left-over tub of vanilla ice cream on a Sunday afternoon from last night’s impulsive purchase. You know it’s going to make you feel like shit later, but you can’t really bring yourself to care – not when the ice cream tastes too good paired with a Sex and The City episode.

You like to delude yourself you’re the early season Miranda; independent, boss bitch, career-driven, straightforward but kind. But you had a mortifying realization that maybe you’re actually Carrie. You’re both so obsessed with love and glorify the idea of “The One” that you overlook red flags in a guy just to stay in a relationship. And for what? To be completely broken and fucked over in the end of it all.

But you don’t want to be Carrie – sure, she has a special place in your heart as a fictional character but real-life Carries, with all of their delusions and ideals, are not meant for the real world.

“You’re watching that show again?”

You almost fall over the couch when you hear a familiar voice behind you, and when you crane your neck to look who it was, your eyes widen.

“Mom!” you exclaim, rightfully surprised. Your mother – in the flesh – smiles as she sees you grin. “Oh my god, I didn’t know you’d be here— wait, how’d you get inside?”

She waves you off. “You know your sister and Jin gave me a duplicate key to their place. Anyway, I’m just here to drop off some side dishes. Also, I know what you’ve been up to. And stop eating that ice cream.”

You pout, taking the tub away from you. When you see her walk towards the kitchen with her bags – presumably the side dishes she was talking about – you follow behind her steps, helping her load the containers in the fridge.

“What do you mean you know what I’ve been up to?”

“You and Jungkook fought, I heard.”

“Mom,” you say with a tone that tells her you don’t want to talk about it at all.

“You know I’m going over there shortly to give him these, right? Supposed to be for the both of you, but oh well, you’re lounging around here.” She says.

“I’m not lounging around here. They love that I’m here.” You counter, referring to your sister and Seokjin. It almost sounded like a whine, though, more than anything. But it was true! They like you being here! They’ve always treated you like their child… but you know you’re kind of pushing it with your sixth-day-stay.

Your mother looks at you disapprovingly, loading the last container before shutting the fringe doors shut.

“Whatever you’re fighting about, you know avoiding it is not going to make it better.”

You sigh. “I’m not even sure if we’re fighting, anyway.”

“What’s that mean?” Your mom asks, sounding confused. You can imagine.

“I don’t know… just – I don’t think we’re angry at each other.”

“Not being angry at each other is worse than being angry at each other. That sounds like withdrawal.”

You wince at her words. “Maybe.”

Your mom sighs. She takes out a bit from the container of stir-fried zucchini and slides you both a plate. “Have you been eating real food? You look like you’re not eating properly.”

Teenager and college you would’ve rolled your eyes because she always says that you’re losing weight and blah blah blah, but it’s not even true. However, you do know she’s just concerned, though, and so you nod your head, picking up a zucchini and eating it.

“Yes. Jin’s a good cook.”

She nods, eating as well. “So is Jungkook. He hasn’t talked to you at all?”

You thought you’ve dodged the topic of Jungkook completely but apparently your mom’s still on that. You nibble on your bottom lip as you think what to say.

“He… uhm… he didn’t text or call.” Well. There was one time. Two days ago. And it was just a simple text about informing you of the sudden change in the OR schedule. You replied to it with a thanks and a smiley face, but he didn’t say anything after that — not that your thanks should guarantee anything. That was not exactly a conversation starter.

Still.

“Have you talked to him?”

Shoot.

You shake your head a bit.

The truth is that you can’t be sad about Jungkook not reaching out when you haven’t been doing the same thing either. You’re running away from him – you can admit that. The past week hasn’t been your proudest moment. You’ve thought it over countless times; why you just can’t go ahead and speak to him – because heck, for eight years you’ve always done a good job at it, communicating with each other when things went wrong. Like when he teases you too much and you actually get offended, and the same goes for him.

But what happened wasn’t just something that came out of a supposedly lighthearted banter. It wasn’t your usual banter at all.

“What happened, sweetie?” And this time your mom’s voice is bordering on concern.

You don’t look at her when you say, “Jungkook said he’s in love with me.”

You don’t get a reaction. At least – the reaction you were expecting. You thought she would gasp, or at least let out an, “Oh”, but there’s none of that. When you peer up at her, she just nods.

As if the news was no surprise.

“And I take it didn’t go well?” She looks at you gently.

“N-no,” you stammer. Swallowing the lump in your throat, you say, “It was – it was so messy that day, mom. You know we went to that resort for his birthday, right? He and my boyfriend fought, and just – so much happened. I don’t even remember half of it. Just that he told me he’s been in love with me for the past eight years.”

Your mom nods. “Your boyfriend… is that Mingyu?”

“Yes.” It feels weird to call him your boyfriend now. You used to be so giddy calling him that. But right now, it feels almost icky.

“Why did Jungkook and him fight?”

You told her what Jungkook told you – everything, and your mom is sweet almost all of the time but as she listens to everything that Mingyu supposedly did and say – especially about you – she can’t help but knit her brows in that quiet anger you know all too well now. But it soon dissipates to worry.

She steps closer to you. You look at her with a sad smile. With that, she encloses her arms around you, and you let your chin fall on her shoulder as you reciprocate her hug. You almost cry when she squeezes you. “How are you feeling then, sweetie?” She asks, voice so gentle and soft. Comforting. You think this has been what you needed all this time.

“Like shit.” you chuckle. “I’ve never been so tired. I haven’t even talked to Mingyu yet – I haven’t been talking to anybody, even my friends. I don't know why I’m like this.”

“You know I worry for you.”

“Hm?”

“You’re such a lovely, sweet girl. And these men keep breaking your heart. I wish I can ease your pain, honey. You have the biggest heart in the world.”

You nibble on your bottom lip as you feel that stinging in your eyes at her words. You remember Jungkook saying almost the exact same thing.

“Jungkook told me that sometime ago.” you say, holding back the cry you know is coming out any second now.

“He knows you well.” She says as she caresses your head.

“I just…” you let out a sigh again, trying to shake off the oncoming tears. “When he told me he loved me all this time, I said I didn’t believe him. I couldn’t wrap my head around it. I still can’t.”

“Do you think he would lie about something like that?”

It’s firm and final when you say, “No.” Because you know in your heart that was true. Jungkook is anything but a liar. And especially about something like that… you just don’t think he would ever hurt you intentionally. That’d be cruel and Jungkook was never cruel. It’s just not in his nature.

“Hm. Then is it because you don’t feel the same way at all? That’s why you can’t believe it?” Your mom asks and it’s the most groundbreaking question you’ve ever heard after a while.

Do you just… not feel the same way?

That was definitely the biggest question you’ve been avoiding answering.

But as your mom pushes you slightly so she can look at you earnestly, gently, like she has no expectations whatsoever – just here to hold and comfort you – it beckons you into spilling your emotions.

“I… I really don’t know, mom.” You intake a sharp breath. “He’s been a constant presence in my life for eight years. We’ve never– we’ve never considered the possibility of being more than just friends. I– I don’t know why he would love me. Or fall for me. He’s never shown interest, the way I saw it – but these days I’ve been rethinking that and I’m beating myself over for being stupid because it’s like – how could I have not known? He’s always been so caring towards me. Always makes time for me. He’s never let me down and he’s just – he’s my person, mom. Always has been. And how could I have thought that he didn’t mean for that to come off as purely platonic?” you stop, feeling your lips wobble. “It’s just… I don’t know. I don’t know what to feel. All I know is that these days without him have been so painful, especially when we haven’t properly talked. I miss him everyday and it kills me that we aren’t like before right now. I want to be by his side all the time, and I think I may have taken that for granted for the past eight years we’ve known each other.”

You don’t realize you’ve let out so much, but your mom just lets you snuggle closer to her, knowing that you’re feeling a lot right now. And you do. You haven’t talked to anyone about what you really felt – not even your sister, even though you knew she did her best to do so – but as your mom soothes your back with the gentle rub of her hand, you let yourself be comforted.

“You know what I think, honey?”

You look up at her with teary eyes, nodding weakly.

She gives you a small smile. “Do you remember that time when I thought he was your boyfriend when you brought him for Christmas?”

Nodding, you chuckle. Second year of med school it was. Eunwoo was in Switzerland for a a big project – and Jungkook’s parents weren’t in town. You both didn’t have anybody to celebrate Christmas with and so you ended up asking Jungkook to come home with you.

It wasn’t just your mom who thought he was your boyfriend. Your sister and Seokjin also assumed the same thing.

Around that time, you haven’t introduced Eunwoo to them yet so basically, they didn’t know that you were taken already.

“I think this is just me being old… but you kind of… you get to know these things, __. You’ll see somebody's eyes, they way they gaze at somebody. When we were opening those gifts during Christmas eve, I saw the way that kid looked at my daughter with so much adoration that I even thought you were just being coy about him being your boyfriend.”

Your lips curl into a tight line.

You… certainly did not notice any of that. Did that really happen?

“I think Jungkook’s a good man, and your dad is fond of him – he asked me yesterday if you’re gonna bring him for Thanksgiving or Christmas, he misses his chess buddy, it seems. No pressure, though,” your mom chuckles. “But Jungkook’s smart, kind, polite, works hard, really charming—” you laugh again, despite yourself, because that’s definitely true. He charmed your parents so quickly with ease. It’s just really about his pleasant personality that attaches people to him. “But most especially, he makes you really happy. I liked that Jaehyun guy and Eunwoo because they made you happy when you were together. Up until they didn’t. I only like people who are good to you, sweetie. That was why I liked your ex-boyfriends for a while,” She begins caressing your head again and you feel like a little girl again, finding comfort in your mom’s bedroom after a bad day at middle school. Your mom smiles softly before she continues, “But those men hurt you. And they leave you. And you know who hasn’t in the past eight years? The only one who’s been consistent in making you happy?”

It’s Jungkook. He’s always been under your nose while you cried over other men, and he was there to support you through it all. He’s the one who makes you laugh at his stupid jokes. The one who sits with you in your feelings on days when you don’t feel your best. He’s the one who lets you cry on his shoulder when a surgery doesn’t go well, the guy who would drop everything for you with one text or call, the guy who gifts you stupid, stupid random things because they reminded him of you. He’s the guy who shares his playlists with you, comments silly stuff on your equally silly posts, and he’s the only one who has never, ever made you feel like you’re not enough. He’s the only one who has never left and hurt you.

It’s always been Jungkook.

Your mom doesn’t need to say the name, though, just one look at you and she knows you're thinking the same thing.

It’s during midday at the hospital when you see Jungkook again.

The elevator dinged and the doors finally opened on your floor, but you froze in your position when you saw who was inside the whole time.

It was Jungkook, sitting slightly on the handrails while crossing his arms. His posture straightened for a bit as he met your eyes, looking equally surprised as you. But then he recovered and relaxed in his position just as quickly.

You couldn’t read the look on his face.

Taking a hold of yourself before the door automatically closes, you stepped a foot inside the lift and pressed on the button of your floor immediately. The 7th floor button is lightened up, so you assumed Jungkook was gonna get off earlier than you since you were going down on the sixth floor.

The confined space had never felt more suffocating. You could feel there was something in the air – a thick tension that was getting too hard to bear every second you felt the elevator moving down.

There was a lump that formed in your throat, especially when you caught a glimpse of the reader going floors down fast, and the 7th one was nearing.

Your heart beat erratically against your chest. You didn’t even feel that nervous back in the OR twenty minutes ago.

But you figured it was the first time you felt close, after all.

It was funny, really – what you felt at that moment. Being physically close to Jungkook had never made you feel like that – like you’re on edge – you’ve always just approached it as something natural, like you were meant to be that way. And those times, you never really thought about the contact ending.

But in that moment, it felt like he was slipping away – even though you were not even holding him in the first place.

It was probably why you let out your next words, craning your neck to the side to try and look behind you where you knew Jungkook was at.

“I miss you.”

You barely said it. Felt like just a soft whisper as the words slipped past your lips, but there was a break around its edges – like it was the most vulnerable thing you’ve ever said.

It was.

And you didn’t exactly know why you did it.

Maybe you just wanted him to know. Maybe you just wanted him to understand that… that you were still there. And that you missed him. Every single day. Regardless of what happened.

There was a thick silence that hung in the air after that, and you should’ve taken back your words right after they came out. Embarrassment should’ve clouded you by then. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do so.

That was as honest as you could get.

You didn’t even expect a reply – assuming that maybe Jungkook hadn’t heard it.

But you heard the soft tap of his steps on the floor and felt his overwhelming presence coming near you. And just like that, you knew he was behind you. Close. A hair's breadth away.

Then, you hear him let out a soft sigh, and you could feel his breath brush against your ear as he leaned down. You never realized how much you craved his affection until you felt him slightly nudging his cheek against the crown of your head.

It made you keen. Made you shut your eyes close. Basking in the moment, but you didn’t ignore the pain that it caused.

Because somehow, despite what might seem like a sweet gesture – the whole thing felt like goodbye.

It was so intimate, though, that you almost forgot that you were currently on the 8th floor and he was dropping off on the next.

The elevator dinged like a wake-up call. And when you opened your eyes, Jungkook had already peeled his body away from you. Nibbling on your bottom lip, you fought the urge to cry as you saw him walking out.

Before the door closed, he took one look at you. His mouth opened, as if wanting to say something. You waited. But he closed his lips again, not bothering to look back for even one last time before the elevator doors closed in front of your face.

The interaction left a certain melancholy in your heart, and it made you run on auto-pilot when the elevator stopped on your floor.

You never expected for the encounter to happen – but it did, in its own way. And now you have to deal with the consequences of your impulsive actions.

Your mindless walking has led your feet to somewhere a bit secluded. It’s far across the hall, and you recognize it as some old, empty ward. You and your friends have one on the 5th floor but you don’t think you’ve never really been here before and so you weren’t sure.

But you’re desperate to let out a good cry. Maybe not exactly cry – but just be alone for awhile. The hospital and your schedule are busy enough as they are and it’s enough to keep your mind occupied since the morning – but that interaction with Jungkook at the elevator reminded you of the weight that you’ve been carrying lately and you just… want to dissipate a little. Even if it means sacrificing your three-minute lunchtime.

You don’t suspect anything as you twist the doorknob open – surprise to see it’s not locked like you thought it would be.

And the sight leaves your mouth hanging open.

“Oh my god.”

“What the fuck.”

“Shit!” You watch as Doyeon pushes off the man wearing a white lab gown on top of her – a very familiar figure that you can only recognize as none other than the attending surgeon Dr. Kim Namjoon.

A panicked, “I’m sorry!” leaves your mouth before you turn on your heel, ready to fly off the scene when you hear Doyeon’s voice calling you from behind.

“Wait, __!”

You hesitantly look back.

It’s obvious what they were doing before you entered the room. Doyeon’s hair is unusually out of the ponytail she always shows up to work with, and Dr. Kim… Jesus. He’s always been so intimidating to you – with his tall stature and his aura that reeks so much of authority, even though he doesn’t even try, it feels so fucking weird to suddenly see him with his hair all mussed up when it always looks kempt every single time you see him along the hallways of the hospital. Right now, he looks coy, like he’s shrinking himself as he avoids looking at you.

“Dr. __, I am so deeply sorry,” His apology sounds so remorseful that you feel bad for even having to barge in. You can see Dr. Kim fumbling with his coat as he looks at Doyeon like he’s looking for help. Doyeon looks at him, but she just… rolls her eyes.

“Joon, just–” She cuts herself off, shutting her eyes close. Seemingly agitated. Or embarrassed. You don’t know why you’re still here. “You should leave now, I’ll talk to __.” Doyeon lets her gaze fall back to you and your eyes widen at the declaration, not really knowing if she was serious or not.

You mean… what are you even going to talk about? Sure! You’re shocked as fuck to see them together in that position but you’re not about to ask her about her sex life!

… Okay. So maybe you are a little bit (only a little) curious about that.

Dr. Kim has always been a mystery to all of you. Taehyung and Jungkook admire him so much, the latter lowkey idolizes him at this point. Nayeon has always spoken highly about him and you’re literally a fan of all his work in his field, especially his books. It doesn’t help that he’s attractive as hell, too, and you all may have gossiped about him at one point in your lives – so sue you for being curious! You’re just human.

“You sure?” Dr. Kim says, barely spoken, but you don’t miss the gentle way he holds Doyeon’s shoulder as he asks that, the way his face contorts into a concerned expression when he looks down at her. One quick interaction and you instantly realize that oh… this is serious.

They’re not just having casual sex in this ward.

This is Doyeon’s boyfriend.

Your bestfriend nods at him and you step aside to give Dr. Kim some space to leave the room, still visibly stunned. You thought he was going to leave when he utters another apology again.

“__, I’m really sorry about this behavior. Doyeon and I—”

Doyeon groans. “Joon, oh my god. It’s fine.”

You watch as Dr. Kim’s (who Doyeon apparently calls “Joon”— what the hell) lips fall into a thin line. “Fine. I’ll go. We’ll talk about this later, alright?”

“I know.”

He gives you both one last glance before the door closes on you.

You swear you tried to look for cameras everywhere – like they do in The Office – to see if the whole thing was a prank. But no. Your life’s unfortunately not a sitcom.

“I told him to lock the door earlier,” Doyeon starts, sounding defeated as she falls back on one of the emergency beds. Sighing, she covers her face with her hands. “This is so embarrassing.”

At that, you can’t help but react immediately.

“You’re embarrassed about the fact that you’re fucking an insanely stupid hot, intelligent man?” Your brows knit.

Doyeon looks at you and you both stare at each other. She holds her own, like she usually does, but for the first time ever, she breaks and chuckles. The laughter turns hilarious, and you follow her into the bed.

“God,” she utters. She licks her bottom lip and looks at you shyly. “I didn’t mean for you to find out this way.”

“I mean… what did you mean to do instead?”

She hesitates. “I’m not sure.”

You frown. “So, you just… you just weren’t going to tell me? Us?” You didn’t bother to hide the tone of disappointment in your words. Doyeon looks a little ashamed when you verbalized that.

“It’s not that. I just didn’t know how,” She says. You knit your brows in confusion. “You know I’ve always been… private about my dating life or whatever. I don’t tell you guys I’m dating until I’m sure the guy and I are official. I… I don’t even date a lot in the first place.”

Well… that was true. You nod at her, giving her a reassuring smile. “Yeah, I get that.” Doyeon smiles a little. “How long?”

There’s a pregnant pause before she says, “Uh… since Feb?”

“Jesus.” She winces at your reaction. You stare at her with your jaw slack. “What the fuck, Doyeon? Nine months?”

“Well, technically, eight but—” you look at her dryly and Doyeon gives up on her attempt at being facetious. “Okay. I’m sorry. It just happened.” You raise your brow at her. She sighs. “Okay, so we may have hooked up last year in December. You remember the Christmas party at the Ritz?”

Your mouth just hangs wider, looking at her incredulously. Every drop of information she lets out just grows your surprise bigger, and you have nothing in substance to say except, “You… whore.”

Doyeon laughs so loud you worry it might have been heard from the outside, but you wince at the slap that follows on your shoulder as she giggles nonstop.

“Shut the fuck up, oh my god.”

“No– I just– Oh my god, was that the reason why you bailed on our own Christmas party over at Nayeon’s?” She nods at your question with her lips pursed. You scoff, still not believing it but just overall amused in general. “You’re really throwing me a curveball here, babe. Like – I have never ever heard you talking about Dr. Kim except when you said you’d totally fuck him in that one drinking session. And then, you actually fucking did.”

She rolls her eyes, scoffing. “He started asking me out on dates in January and he asked me to be his girlfriend in Feb. I don’t even know how it happened. It just did,” She shrugs, as if she just said that the skies are blue. “I’m pretty good at hiding, huh?”

You don’t hide the way you instantly frown.

“I’m happy for you, Doyeon, I really am. But… did you not feel like you could tell me? Or any of us?”

At least she looks apologetic, nibbling on her bottom lip before she says, “It’s not that, __. I didn’t know how to tell you guys. There’s this – there’s this thing when you date a co-worker, especially in the hospital. He’s an attendant, and he’s about to be chief of surgery next two months, you know that right? And it’s just— I know you will never think it, or the rest of our friends – but I just. I didn’t want anyone to think that I’m… that I’m sleeping my way here, you know? It’s fucking weird. And Ms. Yan from fuckass HR hates me for some reason. I’d be public enemy number one around here, __.”

You wince hearing her explanation. Nodding, you rub her shoulder to offer some kind of comfort, noticing that she’s actually silently fuming just by the mere thought of that. Meaning she must have been thinking about it for quite some time now.

“But you know we’ll never think of it like that, right?” You confirm with her, just to be sure. You love Doyeon – she’s basically your sister at this point – and you don’t ever want her to feel like she can’t trust you.

“Of course. I don’t… I can’t really offer you any explanation other than I got scared and just wasn’t ready. Joon wants to let people know… and I don’t know. I guess I’m thinking about that too nowadays.” She says, and she’s not really looking at you anymore, seemingly deep in thought.

You begin rubbing her back. “It’s fine if you’re not ready yet.”

“Oh, this is getting kind of mushy. I hate it.” Doyeon says dryly. You push her slightly which sends her sideways a bit, earning a laugh from her.

“Joon, huh?” You decide to tease to lighten up the mood. Instead of backing down and getting shy like you expected, Doyeon raises her brow. “Can I be honest with you, though?” You say, fiddling with your fingers. She nods so you tread lightly to your next words. “This will sound crazy, I know, but for the longest time I thought Jungkook was your secret boyfriend.”

“What the fuck?” Doyeon says, sharp and almost… disgusted. You don’t expect such a reaction.

“Okay, you don’t need to sound so disgusted. Jungkook’s a good-looking guy and he’s very decent.” You say, sounding weirdly defensive – even to your own ears.

“No– that’s not what I meant—” Doyeon cuts herself off with a laugh. “That’s actually really funny, though.” You look at her curiously. “Somehow, I thought about you thinking that. Especially after that time at the villa when you walked in on us talking by the pool deck.”

“I…” you try to come up with an excuse, something to deny her claim, but nothing comes, and your eyebrows knit in confusion because you actually don’t know yourself why you felt that way back then. You still remember the weird feeling that flared up in your chest upon seeing them in such an intimate position — with Jungkook’s head on Doyeon’s stomach and her caressing his head. Maybe you’re more malicious than you let on, but can she really blame you for thinking there was more to that? Besides, Jungkook’s second closest in the group is probably her. It made sense to assume they were secretly together.

“God, don’t,” Doyeon says incredulously. “Obviously, he’s not my secret boyfriend. I don’t like him and he does not like me, at least not that way. That man only has heart eyes for you and I’m only into Namjoon, thank you very much.”

You wince. “Sorry.”

“But were you really jealous that time, though?” Doyeon asks, intrigued. “I mean, I thought about it. You were acting weird. But I kind of just shrugged it off.”

“I was not jealous, what the hell,” you quickly say. “I was just surprised. And you’re both really close, so I don’t know.”

Doyeon arches her brow. “You’re also both close, so going by that logic, are you two together?” You frown at her. She laughs, knowing she proved her point. “Alright, enough about that. How have you been these days?”

You stare at her before sighing.

“I’ve been wanting to say sorry.”

“Damn straight,” she tells you immediately, like she’s been looking forward to it. “Like, you bitch– I thought you died. Not talking to me or to anybody for a week is crazy.”

“It’s not my proudest moment.”

“Why?”

You subtly inhale a shaky breath. “I… to be honest? I thought you guys were mad at me.”

“What?” You can hear the incredulous tone Doyeon’s taking on. And you slowly realize that you completely just conjured a whole ass narrative in your head the whole time.

“I know. I feel terrible about it. But I just… I couldn’t help but think that I ruined… things.”

“Oh…” Doyeon says, and she cranes her neck down to meet your gaze as you’re tucking your head down slightly. “Why did you think that?”

You open your mouth and close it, trying to find the right words.

“I… know I was completely being ambitious when I said I wanted to bring Mingyu along to the trip – and I realize I shouldn’t have done that. Our relationship was still so fresh, and I was already bringing him along to what was supposed to be our vacation. And the fight happened and the whole thing just went to complete shit. We didn’t even get to spend our five nights there because you guys had to book us a flight immediately and I just… I guess I just feel so bad about it. Had I not invited him… the trip would’ve been way more different. Happier, that I’m sure of.”

“__,” Doyeon calls your name firmly. “That was not any of your fault. Sure, you should’ve consulted with us – because I’m not gonna lie, you threw us in for a surprise when you said that Mingyu was coming, but that fight was not your fault. At all. They physically fought each other on their own accord, even though they knew they were already too grown to be doing that shit. Don’t feel guilty about what those men did.”

You bite your lip. “Still. They— uhm. They apparently fought because of me. It’s stupid.”

“Exactly. But… Mingyu kind of deserved it. Sorry.” Doyeon comments.

You wince. “You know?”

“Jungkook told us about it, yeah.” Doyeon says, as if hesitant to even mention his name in the conversation.

You sigh. You’re not really surprised. “Did he… did he tell you guys… everything?”

“He did.” Doyeon confirms. “It’s not actually new news for us, __.”

You look confuse when you meet her gaze. “How do you mean?”

She presses her lips into a thin line. “He’s in love with you. We’ve known for a while,” You stare at her, mouth agape. Doyeon reluctantly adds, “Since med school.”

“Oh.” You close your eyes for a moment. “Even Nayeon?”

She nods. “Yes.”

You’re silent for a while before you look away. Nodding, you whisper, “I see,” You sigh. “I don’t even… I’m not even surprised about that. Even my mother knows — I mean, Jungkook didn’t tell her of course, but she said she knew he had feelings for me.”

“I think… everybody knows, __.” Your eyes fall to Doyeon. She gives you a gentle smile. “Everybody who sees the way Jungkook looks at you immediately knows right away. He doesn’t have to tell someone he likes you for them to know that. Taehyung and I figured it out ourselves as well. And then Nayeon met you both and she did the same thing. Just had to fish out the confirmation from Jungkook himself.”

“That’s…” you trail off, not really knowing what to say. “I’m really stupid for not noticing all this time, huh?”

“Hmm… maybe. Sort of. But also, not really. I guess it must’ve been just different for you. We’re just bystanders of your interactions — when Jungkook teases you like a fucker it’s easy to assume he’s flirting with you, but it must’ve been annoying as hell for you.”

You chuckle a bit. But it’s with fondness as you agree, “Yeah…”

“He sucks ass at flirting.”

“I agree…” you trail off. “I – well, you probably know, but I told him I don’t believe him,” Doyeon hums, listening in. “I regret saying that. It really hurt him. But… who can blame me, Doyeon? I mean, am I not right for having doubts? Being confused? I mean, okay, yes, I was taken for the first four years we knew each other but I was— I was available two years ago and he didn’t— he didn't do anything. Why didn’t he do anything?” The words are coming off as a rant, you’re fully aware, but you let yourself go, anyway. “He was dating all those women and I just… how am I supposed to believe him when I thought he showed me the opposite?”

“You mean how were you supposed to believe him when he sleeps around?”

You shut your eyes close. “I don’t– I don’t necessarily think he sleeps around, okay? Jungkook’s not a fuckboy or someone who sleeps with anyone with a pulse. He’s too grown for that shit. But I… I just meant, that… he dated a lot all throughout the time we knew each other, so where was I in the equation? You know what I mean?”

Doyeon stares at you for a bit, then she nods, looking ahead. “I know what you mean.”

“Yeah?”

She nods. Then, “Are you worried he’s not sincere about his feelings? Because he dated a lot of people?”

“I-I’m not sure about that.” But maybe, that thought bothers you a bit.

“When was the last time he was with somebody?”

You don’t mean to sound defensive when you retort back with, “I wouldn’t know that. Contrary to popular belief, Jungkook and I do not actually talk about everything, and that includes our sex lives, but I know when he’s… seeing somebody.”

“How?” Doyeon asks, looking at you. She wasn’t trying to trick you into anything, just genuine curiosity written all over her face.

You shy away from her gaze. “Four months ago… Nayeon’s engagement party. He was checking that woman out.”

“Oh… Kwon Jihyo?”

Your brows furrow. “You know her?”

Doyeon nods. “Yeah. Physio class back in freshman year. I talked to her at the party as well,” you grow more confused and Doyeon adds, “Also, she’s gay. Married with two kids.”

“Oh.”

That earns a chuckle from Doyeon. Tapping your arm, she tells you, “You don’t have a gay radar, it’s fine.”

“Oh my god…” you slap a hand on your forehead. “I teased him about sleeping with her after the party…”

You’ve always seen Jungkook as a regular ladies man in your head due to the fact that he gets women, quite very easily. Empirically, Jungkook goes on a lot of dates. But to be completely honest with yourself, you don’t even know the extent of those said dates. Jungkook doesn’t exactly oppose it when you lightheartedly tease him about being a playboy, but you do notice when that puts him off a bit.

Maybe you should’ve pried – maybe he gets put off because it’s simply not true? But you don’t think it’s not not true either, so… do you really think he sleeps around?

“Look,” Doyeon suddenly says which makes you look at her, snapping you out of your own messy thoughts. “I’m not trying to defend him or put in a good word for him or whatever. But I do know that you know him better than I do, so I’m sure you don’t actually think he isn’t sincere about his feelings for you. If you’re worried about his dating history, talk to him about that – but if we’re going by technical definition here, I don’t think Jungkook sleeps around, __. He doesn’t have a new woman switched out for another every seven business days, does he? Or is that a wrong assumption—”

“God, no,” you roll your eyes at her. “And anyway, why are we talking about this? I don’t care who he has sex with. He can do whatever he wants. He’s a grown man.”

“Yeah… but you just said it’s sort of the reason why you’re holding back.”

You feel blood rushing to your cheek because… that is true. You don’t even know why. Because you stand for what you said that he can do whatever the hell he wants. He’s young and he’s objectively attractive and he can have sex whenever he wants…

But somehow, that very thought — of Jungkook being with anybody that way, suddenly made a weird feeling flare up in your chest. You’ve never really paid it mind before, but right now that you now know what you know…

“It just kind of hurts a bit, I guess.” You say, not looking at Doyeon. “I mean, it’s irrational, really. I don’t expect him to be celibate for the eight years he’s claimed to love me, that’s just insane. I’ve also had sex with other people throughout the time and it would be unfair of me to dwell on the fact that he’s been with other people in the past when I also have but… it’s just… you know…” you trail off, and you feel like you’re gonna burst with so much embarrassment from the thoughts running through your head.

“I know… what?” Doyeon says, trying to fill in the gaps.

“I guess I just…” you swallow the lump in your throat. “I guess…. I guess I just expected him to want only me.”

“Oh.” you look at Doyeon. “Oh wow. That’s…”

You huff. “It’s childish, I know. It’s so stupid – I can’t think that. It’s unfair for him.”

Doyeon shakes her head. “No, I mean, I get that. I get that completely,” She scoots closer to you. “You have to know, though, that for the past eight years, Jungkook has tried many times to move on from you.” That words felt like a bucket of cold water. He’s tried…? Doyeon gives you a small smile when she notices the way your face fell. “It was really tough for him when you and Eunwoo got serious, but he couldn’t do anything about it. He tried seeing other people, in the hopes that they could make him feel what he does for you. He didn’t do that in vain – like he did it maliciously in hopes that you would get jealous or whatever. He did that – he does that – because he also genuinely wants to be with someone who can reciprocate his feelings. Min Sora was really close… but I don’t really know what happened to that. I’ve assumed since then that he must still probably love you. And he still apparently does, even to this day. I’m not saying all of this in favor of him, okay? But do you not want to give him a chance because of that? He really loves you, __. He admires you a lot. You don’t know how much he’s just in awe of you. He talks about you a lot when you’re not around, and he’d ditch just about anything to get to you with one call. Look… I don’t know what you feel, and at the end of the day, you call the shots. But I think he’s worth it, __. Because I know him as well and everybody knows he’ll treat you right. You just gotta give him the chance.”

You take in Doyeon’s words carefully.

“That’s not really the only thing I’m skeptical about,” you sigh. “Him having slept with other people is not the top of my concern, because we weren’t in any relationship. Again, I couldn’t have expected him to be celibate all this time. What I’m really worried about is the fact that he’s so— he’s so important to me, Doyeon. I’ve known him for eight years and he’s… he’s quite literally the best thing that ever happened to me—” you stop for awhile because you feel your voice breaking, just in time when the sides of your eyes sting with precedent tears. But you can’t cry right now. You’ve done that a lot in the past few days. “And if— and if I do feel the same, and then we do this thing, what if it all goes wrong? I don’t – I can’t really bear the thought of him not present in my life. I have never considered that ever since I’ve known him. I’m so lucky with my friendships but my romantic relationships all suck. They’re shit. And I don’t want to have a shit romantic relationship with Jungkook, because that would mean I’d lose him. And I don’t want to lose him… do you— do you get me, Doyeon? I’m so scared. Because there's this part of me that wholeheartedly believes what he said, but there’s a bigger part of me that’s in denial because I can’t stop thinking about things going wrong.”

“Hey,” Doyeon gently calls, and you don’t realize that you’ve been holding back a sob because the moment she scoots closer, arm circling your back, you bury your face in her chest and let out a quiet cry. She cradles your head, and you close your eyes at that. “What if things don’t go wrong, though? What if it works out?”

You sniffle. “But things always go wrong for me and my boyfriends. I don’t know what I did to deserve it, but they just never end well.”

Doyeon lets out a heavy breath. “I completely understand that. Again, you know Jungkook better than I do. Better than anybody I know, really. You would know exactly what he’s capable of – and that includes the possibility of him hurting you, or the lack of it thereof. It’s really your choice, __. Just… just talk to him, okay? He’s been wanting to, but you’re not reaching out and he said he didn’t want to suffocate you or anything like that.”

You quickly perk up at that. “He said that?” Doyeon nods. It makes your shoulders deflate. “But… but we were in the elevator today and he…”

“He what?”

“He… uhm… well I said something stupid,” you wince, wiping the stray tears from your cheeks. “I said I miss him, but he didn’t – I don’t know. He didn’t say anything,” Nibbling on your bottom lip anxiously, you look at Doyeon reluctantly, gauging her reaction. “I think he actually hates me now.”

Doyeon is quiet for a moment before she speaks. “You just… you really have no clue how much he loves you, huh? You can kill a close relative of his and he’ll make excuses for you, I don’t doubt that even for a second,” She says and for a moment you’re a bit offended because you’re getting kind of tired of people pointing out that Jungkook being into you is obvious like how the grasses are green, but Doyeon shakes her head, face in pure disbelief. And you just know she didn’t mean it that way. She genuinely looks baffled. “You really need to talk, __. This is… it really hurts seeing you both like this."

You tuck your head down. “I’m thinking about it.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. I think… I’m going back to our place tonight. But I’m not sure. I’ll probably chicken out last minute.”

Doyeon pats your arm. “Do it, okay? Just be honest with yourself and to him. You both need that.”

You give her a small, weak smile.

You’re pretty much drained the moment you arrive at your place. Sighing heavily, you punch in the passcode and almost feel your knees buckling at the sight of the interior of your apartment.

It feels like it’s been so long since you’ve been here, and coupled with the discussion that you had with Doyeon yesterday, everything suddenly feels overstimulating and there’s an urge at the sides of your eyes to cry.

Swallowing the lump in your throat, you breathe in and out as you enter the threshold, noting the fact that nobody is at home. Or Jungkook isn’t present anywhere in the living room. You’re a bit grateful for that if you have to be honest to yourself – after all, the last time that you talked to him did not exactly go as well as you’d like.

He could be in his room, though. That’s what you assume as you go straight over to the kitchen in hopes to heat up the take-out that you bought at the driveway. As you leave your phone on the counter, you notice the to-go container from Chipotle on the same surface, as well as the laptop that is left open beside it.

So Jungkook is home.

The question is, where could he possibly be, leaving out his stuff here in the kitchen? Might be in his bedroom to grab something real quick?

You don’t mean to do the next thing that comes to your mind, but your feet – your stupid feet – track back from the microwave to the island, and your eyes betray you as they go look and read the words on the screen of Jungkook’s macbook.

The tab that shows is an apartment listing website, and besides are more tabs that show some familiar real-estate names you’ve come to on the internet before when you were looking for a place.

It makes you freeze in your spot, eyes glued to the daunting images of the apartment layout that Jungkook must’ve clicked on awhile ago, and you take note that he’s seemingly, specifically, looking for one-apartment bedrooms and studio apartments.

Your mind goes into a sudden haywire at the sight.

What does this mean?

“Oh, hey,”

The embodied voice makes your head snap to its direction, and you see Jungkook standing in front of you in his sweats and shirt – his usual home clothes – with a charger in his hand.

“Jungkook.” You say, or more like, breathe out. Your heart feels like it’s somersaulting for some reason at the sight of him.

But Jungkook looks just as surprised as you.

“I… I didn’t know you’re coming ho– back.” He says, and there’s a twinge in your heart that you ignore when you caught him pointedly avoiding the word home when pertaining to your place. Somehow, that felt intentional.

But you give him a smile. Probably a weak one. Probably doesn’t really look like a smile at all and more like a grimace. If Jungkook notices, he doesn’t say anything. Just goes straight to the direction of the highchairs on the island and plug in his charger for his laptop.

Then, he turns to look at you. “Uh... you just got off from your shift?”

“Yeah. You too?” You say, nibbling your bottom lip with your teeth. A nervous habit.

“Nah, got off a few hours ago.”

“Oh. Okay.”

“Yeah.”

You nod your head. You stand there for a while, letting the silence that’s admittedly awkward hang in the air.

It’s weird, really. Jungkook and you usually have a lot to say to each other – but right now, there doesn’t seem to be a single thing you can say to one another.

It breaks your heart that’s the current case.

“Well, uhm. That’s Zillow.” You say, pointing to his laptop. The moment the words left your lips you swear you could have slapped yourself.

How stupid to ask him about it. How incredibly stupid for that thing to be your choice of topic after weeks of no proper communication with him.

Jungkook seems surprised at this, though, turning his head immediately to look at his own laptop. There’s a certain jerk in his movements when he moves his fingers to the trackpad that closes the entire window of the internet and shows his wallpaper instead.

“Oh. Yeah. That was… Zillow.”

Stupid, stupid you makes everything even more awkward when you say, “You’re looking for a place?”

Jungkook stares at you for awhile. There’s a pregnant pause, and then he nods his head. A bit hesitant. But his voice is full when he speaks.

“Yeah.”

So, he’s moving out. That’s what you think as you avoid looking at his face and let your gaze fall back to his laptop.

You give him a small smile.

“Ah. Good luck with the search, then.”

Your heart completely breaks when you say the words.

Suddenly, the words of your supposed confession get stuck and they die in your throat. You let yourself believe that coming home tonight would fix everything; you just had to go inside, talk to Jungkook, tell him you were sorry about what you said – and the rest would just do its thing and you'll be back to okay.

But he's moving out, and every bit of hope in you shuts down.

Jungkook doesn’t say anything for a while, and you’re just about to turn on your heels to go to your room but then he utters lowly, almost like a whisper.

“It’s not final.”

“Hm?” You hum, not sure if you caught that.

Rubbing the back of his neck, Jungkook looks away as he says again, “I mean, I’m just looking. I was gonna talk to you before I finalize my plans.”

“Talk to me? Why?”

“Since we’re on a joint lease and all that.”

“Oh.” You nod to yourself, dumbfounded. It's embarrassing the way you lit up with expectation when he said it wasn't final, for it to completely die anyway when he said that. You feel like you're not wanted. “Yeah. Right.”

“I assume you’re tired from your shift, though, so maybe we can go over it tomorrow? Or any day you like, really.” Jungkook shrugs.

“No, tonight’s fine,” You wave your hand, walking towards his direction and seating yourself on the chair beside him. You try to focus all your attention on the screen in front of you instead of Jungkook’s overwhelming presence. You’ve always thought he was big but tonight, he feels even bigger and you’re intimidated. “Are you writing a notice to the landlord?”

“Yeah – I mean, after we talk about the move, that is.”

“Wow.” You can’t help but let out. “You really thought about all this while I was away?”

You regret the words just as instantly as they leave your mouth.

Looking at Jungkook hesitantly, you watch as his face falls, mouth opening and closing, as if at a loss for words.

You take them back before he says something. “Sorry — I didn’t mean for it to come out that way.” Sharp and edgy, clipped and… angry. Sort of accusatory. Like you’re pinning something bad on him.

“It’s fine.” Jungkook says after awhile, returning back his gaze on the laptop.

His withdrawal makes you deflate. He seems so uninterested. Is he done with you? Just like that?

“You know what,” You utter after a pregnant pause, standing up from the chair and getting back on your feet. “I actually have a headache. I think we should go over this tomorrow.”

Jungkook looks confused but he nods, anyway. “I just… stocked up on Advil yesterday. So, if you need it… it’s just in the kit.”

“Sure. Thanks,” You give him a small smile. “I’ll, just go, uh, shower for a bit.” You point to the bathroom across from you.

Before you go, Jungkook calls your name.

“__.”

You turn around to look at him. “Yes?”

“Are you…” He trails off. You wish he’d look at you like he usually does. “Are you back for good?”

You don’t expect that question at all. But you collect yourself on time to respond. “Yeah. I guess I am.”

Jungkook’s expression is something unreadable, so you throw him an awkward smile. You’re not sure if he returned it, because everything is becoming too much, and you can’t help but overthink every single thing he does. So, before you can dwell on that, you go straight to the bathroom to do your business.

You shower quickly – you can’t focus when you know that Jungkook is just outside, and he can probably hear the water running. You’ve never really paid thoughts to these stuff except the first few weeks of moving in with him, but right now, there’s a certain awkward tension in the air and it’s slowly suffocating you. You needed to get out of the shower box quick.

And so you did, but you don’t expect the series of knocks on the door, with Jungkook’s voice behind it.

“__?”

“Y-yeah?” You stammer, wrapping your towel around you (that Jungkook thankfully hasn’t thrown out yet) with haste and getting to the door immediately to answer him.

When you open it, Jungkook visibly freezes for a bit. And you realize you’re in nothing but a piece of cotton; bare underneath, droplets of water running through your body from the tips of your uncovered, wet hair.

You consciously tighten the towel around your body, making sure to act unbothered when you say, “What?”

Jungkook seems to snap out of the moment just as you did. When you follow the hand that he lifts, you see your phone in it. Weirdly enough, you had time to notice the way the device fits so small in his hand when you can barely wrap your phone around your fingers yourself.

What the actual fuck are you talking about, you tell yourself at the back of your head. What the fuck what the fuck what the fuck—

“You left this on the counter. Mingyu’s been calling you.”

It’s like you’ve been suddenly hit by a truck upon hearing the name.

“Oh. Okay. Sorry about that.” You take your phone when he offers it to you. You don’t know why but you avoid Jungkook’s eyes as you step out of the bathroom and press the decline button, causing the ringtone to stop abruptly.

You don’t look back at him as you enter your bedroom, locking the door and throwing your phone on the mattress and going straight to your closet.

Nothing much has changed since the last seven or so days. What would change, anyway? It’s not like Jungkook has some sort of business in here.

When you finished dressing yourself up with your usual pajamas, a worn-out tee and a pair of short shorts, you go over right to your bed, picking up your phone.

The notification bar says that you have six missed calls from Mingyu and two texts. An upgrade from his three to four times in the previous days.

See, it’s not only Jungkook or Doyeon or Nayeon or Taehyung whom you’ve been avoiding. It’s also Mingyu. The last time that you two talked was when you said goodbye to each other when he was catching his flight from the resort. You’ve completely shut everybody out after that thing happened, and again, it’s not your proudest moment. You’re only non-confrontational to a certain degree, but you usually handle your problems like a grown woman.

You just really don’t know how to handle this one.

But Mingyu’s been calling, and you haven’t answered or replied to any of his messages ever since.

It’s just… everytime you think about him… it hurts.

It hurts to think of somebody you’ve given your trust to, only for them to step on it without any remorse. It hurts that you once thought he was going to be the one, only for him to end up as someone you’re starting to… hate. It hurts extremely that just eight days ago, you held this high level of adoration for him, but now you don’t feel anything at all but simmering anger.

Sighing, you click on his message instead of sliding it out, gearing yourself for what you’re about to read.

gyu😽 [10:15pm]: Dinner at my place tonight? gyu😽 [10:32pm]: Can you pick up my calls?

You scrolled through the other ones he sent in the past week, and you find out that they’re simply just a variation of “do you want to have dinner together tonight”, “why aren’t you picking up?” and shockingly… a couple texts of “i miss you”.

You’ve only been bullshitting when you told Jungkook that you had a headache, but right now that excuse might be true because you can feel a tick in your head, a certain bang on the front, and you just want all of this to end.

Letting out a controlled breath, you swallow the lump in your throat as you type a reply. Finally.

You [10:50pm]: Can we talk tomorrow?

To your surprise, Mingyu responds quickly.

gyu😽 [10:51pm]: of course. dinner?

You [10:52pm]: yeah. i get off at around 8 tomorrow.

gyu😽 [10:52pm]: I have some paperworks to attend to but 8 is fine by me. gyu😽 [10:53pm]: Can we go to a restaurant? gyu😽 [10:53pm]: I haven’t cleaned my place so I thought we could go outside

You [10:54pm]: It’s alright. Also, no need to pick me up. I’ll uber.

gyu😽 [10:55pm]: You sure?

You [10:56pm]: Yeah.

gyu😽 [10:56pm]: Alright then.

You don’t get a lot of sleep that night.

“Hey, sorry I’m a bit late. The partners had a meeting over at the firm,” Mingyu says, loosening his tie a little, breathing a bit sharp as he takes the seat across from you.

You nod, giving him a small smile. Taking a sip from your water, you watch as Mingyu fixes his tie again, some sort of attempt to look kempt, like he hasn’t just run here. He was in a rush, and you feel bad that he had to go over here quickly when the partners meeting was probably something important. He could’ve canceled and you wouldn’t have mind.

“So. Hi,” Mingyu greets you as if he’s making up for his rash entrance earlier. He gives you a smile, the one that’s his usual charming smile – you remember fawning over it the first time you met him. “How have you been?”

“Fine. I’ve been doing well.” you answer. In your lap, your fingers fiddle with each other.

You’ve thought about how you are going to go over this, but obviously the scenarios that played in your head yesterday and before you went here were so much more different than now. You weren’t an anxious mess in your imagination.

Mingyu nods. “That’s good to hear. Been doing fine as well.” He says casually.

That makes something flare up in your chest.

Fine? He’s been doing fine?

Before you can say something, a waiter comes up to your table to give you the menu, and that effectively keeps you from saying the words you were probably going to regret as soon as they come out of your mouth.

You both tell your respective orders to the waiter before he walks away, leaving you two nodding and smiling ahead. When he’s gone, you’re left alone with Mingyu again.

You look at him — and his usual suits and tie ensemble would usually make you gush internally about how good he looks, how you can still see the way he’s built under the pristine fabric of his clothes, and how attractive he is the way he carries himself.

“I’m glad you called me tonight, sweetheart.”

And you don’t expect the way the hairs on your body tingle with… ick.

“Sure.” You say, drinking from your glass of water again.

Just get over it, your mind convinces you. But how are you going to approach it?

Moments pass and then suddenly, Mingyu lets out a heavy breath. You peer up at him, raising a brow.

“Alright, I’m not gonna skirt around this anymore, __,” He says, and his eyebrows are knitted in what seems like confusion when he meets your gaze. “What’s going on with you? You’ve been avoiding me.”

The confrontation somehow eases you even though it shouldn’t.

Licking your bottom lip – an anxious habit that you try hard to forgo – you compose yourself before you say, “I have. Yes, you’re right.”

“Why?” Mingyu asks with genuine curiosity.

Somehow, this bothers you. Does he really not know or he’s just pretending not to know? Whichever it is, it does not really make you feel any better about him. If he’s pretending not to know, then he’s an even bigger asshole than you’re letting him on, but if he does not know, then that’s just even worse. Imagine doing all of those things and not being aware that you did something wrong enough to upset people?

“I have to be completely honest with you, Mingyu. I want to break up.”

The words come out easily as opposed to what you expected.

Somehow, it’s strange, really. You’ve never dumped anybody before. Of course, you don’t count those casual dates you’ve had in the past two years because they were never that serious. But usually, in your long relationships, the other guy does the dumping and never you.

So, right now, as you sit across from Mingyu, finally declaring what you’ve been thinking over the past week, you feel a sense of liberation. A cliché, really. There’s a feeling of discomfort gnawing at some parts of you, but you choose to ignore it, bravely meeting his gaze instead.

“What?”

“I want to break up with you.” You reiterate, this time fuller so he knows your decision is final.

His mouth opens and closes, and there’s a pregnant pause that hangs in the air before he finds his tongue. “But why?”

“Are you serious?” You can’t help but snap. “Do you really not know?”

“No. Fill me in, because I’m confused.” Mingyu doubles down, and it fires you up a little bit.

“Mingyu, Jungkook told me everything,” You say, and you notice the way his expression changes into something more… unreadable the moment you dropped Jungkook’s name. “And I mean everything. What you did with his girlfriend back in college, and what you said about me to goad him into a fight. I mean, what were you thinking, Mingyu? All of that was just… low. Even for you. I can’t believe you’d do any of that.” You catch your breath after you say the words, not realizing how heavy it would feel to let them out. You’ve never been confrontational, would prefer if the other person did all the talking, and to do this right now is taking so much from you.

“He told you everything?” Mingyu asks again. You watch as he relaxes his posture, and you grow confused when his lips curl into a smirk. “I knew he would do that. Come crying to you with his lovesick head. Did he finally grow some to tell you he loves you, then?”

You recoil, not expecting that. “That’s none of your business.”

“It is my business. You’re my girlfriend.”

“I’m not anymore.”

Mingyu inhales a sharp breath. “So, you’re choosing him?”

“I—I— what?” you blurt out, surprised at his audacity. “I’m not choosing anybody. And it’s really bold of you to assume that you’re still one of my options after all that.”

Scoffing, Mingyu drinks from his water. He looks at you with a blank stare as he says, “Well, be honest with me now. Do you love him?”

“Do I love him?” You chuckle, not the least bit of humor in it. “You don’t really deserve my honesty, Mingyu. You had all of those four months to be honest with me and you didn’t do shit. Don’t ask me any personal questions and expect me to give you an honest answer. Because I won’t give you any of it.”

“You said a lot of things but I know you love him just as much as he loves you.”

“What are you talking about?”

This time, Mingyu’s tone borders on sharp when he leans down to get to you closer so you can hear him clearly. “You think it was easy for me to be in a relationship with you when all you could talk and think about was Jungkook? Jungkook who was only supposedly your bestfriend?” It’s said with so much wrath that you can’t help but physically recoil at his words. When you don’t say anything, Mingyu continues, “Jungkook told me this movie’s good, Jungkook said their aglio e olio tastes great, Jungkook and I were just talking about this — I could go on how many times you’ve always managed to insert him in anything even when we’re together, but I did not want to be that kind of boyfriend who got jealous over their girl’s friends, and I was that for you – and you think I’m the bad guy here?”

You blink, mouth opening and closing. You fish for some words, something to defend yourself with. Have you really said all that? Did you really do that? Did you really talk about Jungkook enough times that Mingyu took notice of it?

You’ve always thought that your friendship with Jungkook is platonic. You’ve convinced yourself of that and Jungkook seemed to think the same — at least that’s what you thought prior to his confession – and you like to think that your friendship works, even though the majority of people don’t agree that opposite genders can be purely friends.

But… did you think wrong? Did you really just convince yourself it was platonic when all along… it was not?

You don’t exactly recall the moments that you talked about him while you were with Mingyu. It’s hard to when talking about Jungkook just comes like second nature. You don’t count the times you see the grass being green – because they are and will always be green.

And that’s what Jungkook is to you. He’s been such a constant presence in your life that you can’t help but bring him up in any case because… because it just feels right to do so.

Now you think about your relationship with Eunwoo. How he never really liked Jungkook. Did he think the same as Mingyu? Did you also talk about your best friend too much in his presence? Did he count the times you mentioned Jungkook’s name in your conversations? Do you really talk so much about him?

“See?” Mingyu says after a while and it snaps you out of your stupor. “Don’t tell me I’m a liar when you’ve also been lying to me this whole time.”

“How dare you?” You snap at him. You can take him pointing out about the thing with Jungkook, but never this. “I didn’t hide anything from you. I was not the one with the history of cheating with their friend’s girlfriend and I didn’t talk behind your back like you’re merely just a piece of meat.”

Mingyu visibly stills and you bite your lip after saying the words. You didn’t mean for it to come out that way. Didn’t really mean to say that in the first place. But it’s done and you can’t cry over spilled milk.

Doesn’t negate the fact that you feel like shit, though.

“You think I didn’t regret what I did?” Mingyu says, a little quiet this time. If you weren’t at the quieter part of the restaurant, in a booth where the sound of the classical music and people’s chatters are muffled, you won’t hear him at all. “Jungkook and I were close, __. We really were. And I fucked up and ruined his trust. But you also don’t know how and why that happened. Jiyeon was already cheating on him before she hit on me–”

“Oh, so is that the part where you volunteered to be one of her “victims”, too?” You say sarcastically, cutting him off, incredulous about the fact that he’s really trying to make excuses for himself right now.

“We were fucking drunk– and high, okay? We didn’t know what we were doing.” Mingyu says through his teeth, and it’s the first time you see him lose control. He’s always so kempt and so composed, it’s baffling you’re seeing him in this state.

But you refuse to believe his bullshit.

“You know what, I don't know why you’re saying this to me. You should be saying this to Jungkook and frankly, I simply don’t care. What happened back then is between you – don’t include me into any of your arguments ever again,” You say exasperatedly. “My issue is that – and why I’m breaking up with you in the first place – is that you lied to me, Mingyu. You lied to me about so much. And If I were to go through this relationship with you longer, I don't know what else you’re going to lie to me about, and I don’t want that. Let’s not waste each other’s time and end it right here, right now.”

Mingyu leans back on his seat. “I can’t change your mind even if I apologize to you about that, huh?”

You shake your head.

He nods.

“Alright.”

You look at him again.

Kim Mingyu has sharp features that usually make him look broody from an outsider perspective, but you’ve seen the way he smiles and how gentle he looks when he does. Right now, though, he looks… genuinely sad.

He lied to you, yes, but somehow, there’s still some part of you that wants to know if he felt the least bit genuine about you. That it wasn’t all just a ploy to get to Jungkook.

“Did you really like me? Even for a moment?” You break the silence, voice breaking slightly at the end.

Mingyu looks up at you and you don’t expect the way his lips curl up into a small smile. “Yes, __. I did. I liked you the first time we met and believe it or not, I still have feelings for you right now.”

You look away to avoid his intense gaze.

It’s weird. It’s so weird. Because even though you know in your heart that he’s not and will never be good for you and that he’s not a loss, your heart still aches at the declaration.

“I don’t really know if I believe that.” You say, almost like a whisper.

“I’m sorry, then.” Mingyu says, and it sounds so sincere that you start to feel some sort of stinging in both sides of your eyes.

In what seemed like forever, the waiter arrives with your orders, and you both look up and offer him a hand in placing them on your table, bidding him thanks as he once again walks away.

You and Mingyu both look at your food.

“I think I’m going first. I have a trial tomorrow, so I need to take care of that.” He says suddenly.

Nibbling your bottom lip, you watch as he begins to fix his shirt, ready to stand up.

“Okay.”

“__?” You look up at him when he calls your name. He seems to hesitate for a bit, but he says, “Can you… can you tell Jungkook I’m sorry?”

Staring at his face, you try to look for a hint of sarcasm. Or anything indicative of malice. But all you see is sincerity.

At that, you shake your head. “No.” Mingyu’s face falls. “Talk to him yourself if you really are sorry. I’m not your mailman, Mingyu.”

He sighs. “Alright. I guess you’re right,” And then, “And I’m saying sorry, to you too, you didn’t deserve that. I was angry, and that’s not an excuse. So, I’m sorry. Will you…” he clears his throat. “Will you ever forgive me?”

You shrug. “I don’t know. Probably.”

Mingyu gives you a timid smile. “Okay.”

When he takes out his wallet and a black card from there, you instantly stop him from calling over the waiter.

“No, it’s fine, I’ll take care of it. I’m the one who invited you here.” You say, talking him out of paying.

He shakes his head, insisting, “It’s okay.”

“Seriously, I can handle it.”

Mingyu lets out a chuckle which makes you smile a bit before you scold yourself.

“I know. But can you let me? This is… this is probably the last time we’ll see each other.”

At that, you relax back in your seat, staring at him. He stares right back at you.

With a slow nod, you let him call over the waiter.

He departs with a small goodbye that you return with a timid wave.

When you go home that night, you cried yourself to sleep, thankful that Jungkook hasn’t come home from his shift yet.

Things are… fine.

Unlike your previous break-ups that left you in agony for the following days after it happened, the one with Mingyu did not really leave a huge emotional impact. It makes you wonder if you’ve overestimated your feelings for him… makes you question yourself if you really thought he was the one when things were fine, and you both dated happily.

You don’t bother yourself looking for answers, because the relationship is done and there’s no point in going over the details when it’s you yourself who ended the ties.

While that is not the sole reason of your melancholic feeling these days, it lies on another person; your roommate, Jungkook – your best friend of eight years who’s apparently been in love with you the whole time.

It’s only been a few weeks ever since you talked about him moving out. He said it was about time for him to leave the place – he’s been here longer than you, after all. He wrote and sent the notice to his landlord, and it’s been about two weeks since then, so you assume he’s already got his approval.

While things may look normal and right from an outsider’s perspective… things aren’t exactly the way they were before.

Jungkook and you are close. You share almost everything together. Your friendship has been honed throughout the many years and obstacles you’ve faced together and so it’s only natural for you two to be as close.

But nowadays… you can feel that closeness slipping away. It flares up something inside you; like that feeling of grief when you remember that friend in highschool who you stopped talking to after graduation. You don’t know exactly what the reason is for the abrupt end of communication, but the finish line is there and you’ve both reached it without the other knowing – and you’re left fending for yourselves, looking ahead at your own worlds and letting your lives flow to the stream of the river.

It’s strange, really; how everything feels somewhat normal but also really under that condition.

Jungkook and you would text each other nonstop – he could be in his own room, and he’d still text you about random shit that ends up with him going to your room anyway just to annoy you for a bit before you kick him out and you both go to sleep. He’d ask to borrow something – anything, ask your food preference for the night, and he’d always ask you when your shift ends so you can go together if your schedules align. Meanwhile, you ask him to join you in the living room for spontaneous movie nights, ask him to give you a massage, and you’d both talk about your days, catching up on the hours you weren’t together.

And now there’s none of that.

Now, you both greet each other when the other one gets home almost like a chore. Like how your roommate from college used to welcome you when you arrived at the dorm from classes. When either you or he is in the living room or something, you’d both tell each other that “Dinner’s in the fridge, you can microwave it”, instead of “What do you think we should have for dinner?”. Jungkook asks if you need a ride to the hospital because he knows you don’t have a car anymore, but you refuse because it’s obvious it’s just for formality.

You don’t know if it’s just the overthinker in you, but it feels like Jungkook’s pulling back and he has no intention of making things right – or talk about what happened.

He’s so… he’s so civil.

And you miss him so much it makes you sad.

It makes you confused. Sort of mad. He makes you feel a lot of things – but you hate that you’ve just been compartmentalizing and not doing any processing at all.

You spent the past few weeks pointing out to yourself the differences that your relationship is going through. You spend some nights beating yourself up whether to go barge in his room and confront him with everything – but you do none of that.

Instead, you pretend everything’s okay. At the hospital, you’ve no longer avoided him and said hi which he returns with a smile. Nayeon, Taehyung, and Doyeon, thought at first that everything’s back to normal, but you know they’re slowly realizing that it has not.

Tonight, though, at Nayeon’s reception party after her wedding, you try hard to ignore all those angsts and choose to enjoy yourself instead. It’s Nayeon’s big day. The last thing you wanted to be was a bum.

Everybody is socializing with each other, and since you’ve had your fair share of conversations with other people at this point, you choose to sit out on the dance.

Suddenly, Billy Joel’s Uptown Girl is playing and the majority coos and exclaims in excitement as they hurry to the dancefloor, some taking their partners along with them.

“Look, they’re playing your favorite song.”

Your head snaps to the side in reflex to see who it was, only to see Jungkook. Words get caught in your tongue for a moment, a bit surprised to see him. You mean – sure, he’s been here for a while. It is Nayeon’s wedding, after all, but weirdly enough, you two haven’t shared a conversation yet throughout the day.

Until now, anyway.

Recovering from your initial surprise, you scoot over to the side, giving him space to maybe… sit beside you?

“That’s not my favorite song.” You scoff, sipping on your champagne right after, looking right ahead as you feel Jungkook situating himself on the chair beside you.

“Oh… has it changed now?” Jungkook says, and there’s a lilt of teasing tone to it that you look at him in wonder.

Meeting his gaze, you find he’s just smiling at you. He’s in an off-white tux, a lily pinned on his chest pocket. He’s done his hair in that usual way he cleans up for formal events like this, gelled and parted slightly off center to show off his forehead. It’s slightly longer than you’ve last noticed it looked, and you think he hasn’t been trimming it…

Nonetheless, he looks simply put… dashing.

“I change my favorite song every five to seven business days,” you say coolly. “Anyway, why aren’t you there?” you point to where the flock of people is having a ball to Billy Joel.

Truthfully, you kind of wish you were there as well. You’ve always danced to that song in your room or in the shower.

“I’m right where I want to be,” Jungkook shrugs. “Why aren’t you there?”

You lie, “I’m right where I want to be as well.”

He hums. “You don’t want to show them your moves?”

You look at him in disbelief, gawking at him. “Are you teasing me?”

Jungkook widens his eyes, but you know he knows what you’re talking about, and it sounds like he’s trying to keep from laughing when he says, “No. I just happen to know you’re a great dancer.”

With that, you feel yourself getting carried away by how easily your conversation goes. It makes you think about the old times – where talking to him always made your day because he's funny and he makes you laugh and you make him laugh.

“Fuck off. You know very well I have two left feet.” You chuckle, shaking your head at him.

“Wasn’t the case when you were dancing inside a boiler room during med school at that rave party we went to, but okay.”

You can’t help but laugh louder, and with that, you jab a lighthearted slap to his bicep without thinking too much of it.

“I told you that never happened.”

“Oh…” Jungkook puts down his champagne and cocks his head to the side. “What happened?”

You giggle. Yes, giggle. Like a schoolgirl. And you watch as Jungkook joins in your laughter, taking the glass close to his face to sip from it.

Then: “You wanna dance?” Jungkook suddenly says, but he’s looking at the dancefloor.

“Hm. Dunno. Uptown Girl isn’t exactly rave music.”

That earns you a chuckle from Jungkook. “But it’s fun music, right?”

Soon after, he stands up from his seat. You look at him questioningly, but he mirrors it back with an expectant gaze and a raised brow. Seeing you getting apprehensive, he offers his hand and that’s when you roll your eyes, taking his hand as you pretend to stand up against your will and follow him to the crowd.

You chuckle as Jungkook suddenly sways his hips to the upbeat of the song, moving his arms around playfully. You’d like to think he’s doing that intentionally – to make you laugh? Loosen up? Whatever the idea behind it, it’s effective, because you can’t stop laughing as you watch him.

“Come on, we do this all the time!” Jungkook says over the loud music and people’s candid chattering.

And he’s not wrong because you do have mini parties in the living room of your apartment, pretending like the city before the glass wall across the area is your audience.

But you two are usually drunk during those moments, and right now, with only one glass of champagne, you’re not near being tipsy.

“This is so silly!” You exclaim, but you find yourself matching Jungkook’s spontaneous choreography, and it earns you a laugh from him as well.

“And when she’s walking, she’s looking so fi-i-ne,” Jungkook sings along, gesturing to you. You cover your face because you can’t stop laughing at how he looks – how you two must look – but you’re almost sure nobody’s paying attention because everybody is just having fun on their own. He has a good voice, though – even though he’s trying to act goofy with it. Jungkook doesn’t like when people point it out, or more like, gets shy when you bring it up.

Suddenly, he steps closer to you and reaches for your hand. Looking at him with confusion, still with that wide grin on your face, he gives you a playful smile before he guides your arm upwards. You utter a sound of a delighted snort, understanding where he’s getting at. With Jungkook guiding you, you do a mildly successful turn that makes you both laugh because as you were just getting back in your original position, you almost trip. Good thing that Jungkook’s there to catch you by the waist, the contact only lasting for a brief second before he lets go to dance on his own again.

“I wish I was an uptown girl!” You yell over the music.

“You’re kinda an uptown girl if you think about it.” Jungkook responds, nodding his head as if he believes that.

You chuckle, shaking your head at him. “No.”

“Yes, you are. You’re sophisticated and elegant.”

“Well, this—” you point between your bodies, “– is not very sophisticated and elegant of me.”

“Touché.” Jungkook laughs.

“But will you be my downtown man?” You say, not really thinking too much about it but then you suddenly realize what you just said and you’re about to add something to it – like putting a disclaimer that it was just a joke.

But then Jungkook leans closer, ducks down to level with your ear. “I can be if you want me to.”

The song ends and you barely had time to process what just happened before the soft piano progression of Carole King’s Will You Love Me Tomorrow begins to play.

You hear the collective “Aww”s from the audience and you watch as everybody suddenly pairs up with someone else. As the first lyric of the song is sung, you can feel the upbeat energy from earlier dropping to a calmer atmosphere. Romantic, you’d say it is.

When you look at Jungkook again, he has a small smile on his face. It’s as gentle as the piano behind the song.

“Can I?” He says.

You nibble on your bottom lip. “You want to?”

Jungkook only nods, still smiling.

“Only if you want to as well.”

You look around again. It’s not hard to spot Taehyung from afar on the dancefloor as well, with a gorgeous Hyerin in his arms. He doesn’t seem to notice you looking, though, but you watch the way he ducks down to whisper something in her ear, prompting a laugh from her.

Putting your gaze back to Jungkook, you blink as you say, “It’s… okay, I guess.”

“Okay?” Jungkook clarifies. You nod your head and he smiles that dashing smile again before he steps closer to you.

Slowly, he puts a hand around your waist. And you know he did it awhile ago, but the contact ended so briefly that you didn’t really have the chance to… somehow… savor it, maybe? But right now, as you fumble with your own hand, deciding whether or not you should put a hand on his waist as well, the proximity makes your breath hitch.

Your heart beats abnormally fast against your ribcage, and usually, it’s not hard to stare Jungkook in the face – but you find it a difficult task to do nowadays.

Jungkook, unsuspecting of your inner dilemma, only seems to notice your confusion with your hand placement, chuckling as he guides your wrist to his shoulder. He raises his other arm with yours and interlocks your fingers with his mid-air.

“There,” Jungkook says once you’re in the right position. “Now we look like professional dancers.”

You wince. “What’s the next step?”

“You’re taking this very seriously,” Jungkook snorts as he begins to move his feet.

You try to match his pace, and that distracts you from the fact that you're so close you can smell his cologne very well.

“Where did you learn this?” You ask instead, quite amazed at how Jungkook is approaching this. It’s not like you’ve never slow danced in your life – but you weren’t kidding when you said you have two left feet.

“Wikihow.”

“Wow.”

“They can be super reliable at times,” Jungkook chuckles as he continues to swing you both gently. “Stop looking down.”

You groan. “Ugh, no. I’m trying very hard not to not step on you.”

“So what if you step on me? Just relax.”

Jutting your bottom lip out, you look up at him. “My heels are Louboutin.”

“Even better.”

“Stop.” You break away from his hold with your other hand to jab at his chest lightly. Jungkook lets out an “Owe!” but you know it didn’t actually hurt when he just grins down at you, placing his hand on your waist instead so now he’s just… simply holding you.

You ignore the weird feeling in your chest at the action, choosing to keep your hand on his chest.

“You wanna know something?” You whisper. Jungkook hums. “I didn’t go to prom in highschool.”

“What? Why?” Jungkook genuinely seems surprised to hear that.

You smile sadly, looking back at the memory bitterly. “Changsub and I were fighting around that time because I saw him at the mall with some girl the previous week. I was so angry that I didn’t care about what I’d be missing out on. My mom tried really hard to get me to attend, but I was very stubborn. Now I still regret not going to prom. My dress was really pretty back then too but I didn't even get to wear it.”

“Damn,” Jungkook utters. “He really was such a dick to you, huh?”

“Yeah. But it was still on me, though… I can’t believe I let a boy make me miss out on prom night.” You pout.

Jungkook’s quiet for a while before he abruptly stops his swaying. You look at him in confusion as he lets go of your waist.

“Well, I don’t have a corsage… but this can maybe do?” He fumbles with his chest first before he takes out the silk lavender handkerchief from his suit’s pocket that matches his tie and the lily on his chest. He looks at you for a while before he takes your wrist in his hand. Your brows knit together as he ties the fabric around your wrist, making sure to finish it up with a ribbon – an attempt at a ribbon, that is.

You chuckle. “What’s this?”

Jungkook grins. “You wanna know something too? I didn’t have a date on prom night – was too scared to ask anybody out. I went home after the first hour. Wasn’t really a fond memory. So, prom night definitely sucked for me… what I’m saying is that, it’s not really all that.”

You duck your head down to laugh, partly to hide the flutter in your heart at his words.

“So, like, is this our – what – our upgraded prom night?”

Jungkook nods proudly. He takes both your hands as you laugh, wrapping them around his neck, taking you by the waist again.

This time, you don’t feel like your breath is being taken away.

You feel… serene. The beating of your heart is back to normal. You realize, there’s a sense of comfort that comes from being close to him like this – talking and laughing like good old times.

You miss him. You miss him so much and you can’t believe you ever considered accepting a life without him in it.

“The dress looks good on you, by the way,” Jungkook comments, and it sounds so sincere that you can’t help but smile. As if that wasn’t enough to melt your heart, he adds, “And you look really beautiful.”

“T-thanks,” you stammer, taken aback at the almost intimate way he looks right into your eyes as he said that. You tighten your hold around his neck. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“Thank you.”

You both chuckle, though there was nothing really funny said in particular.

Carole King’s gentle voice soothes you as Jungkook takes the lead of the dance. You’re not even doing anything other than just going with the flow, letting him take you wherever. There’s a moment when you were sure you stepped on his shoe, but Jungkook’s quick to dismiss you with a hush and saying it was nothing.

Tonight with words unspoken,

You say that I’m the only one

But will my heart be broken,

When the night meets the morning sun

You scoff as you finally hear the lyrics.

That may have taken a hit on you.

“This is so stupid.” You say.

Jungkook’s quick to react.

“Rude. I’m literally giving you a prom night from scratch.”

You look at him and you feel bad because he genuinely seems offended at your supposedly throw-away comment.

Shaking your head, you tap his chest lightly. “No, no. I mean– the lyrics. The song.”

Jungkook arches a brow. “I have a video of you crying over this song in your car when it came up on your playlist.”

“I didn’t cry over this song.” You roll your eyes.

“Not as much as you did over Silver Springs, anyway.”

“Oh my god, why do you know so much, Jesus,” you hiss, embarrassed at being confronted by your dramatic antics. “I just meant, why are they playing such a sad song at a wedding? Who approved this?”

“Eh,” Jungkook shrugs. “Maybe Nayeon’s a Carole King fan.”

“Is she?” you ask, genuinely curious. If she is, she never told anybody.

“Maybe…?”

You can’t help but laugh because of how the conversation progressed. Jungkook laughs as well, and he takes the jab you send to his chest with a light hand. They’re really hard, you think, and you don’t know what comes over you as you lean your head down and let your body fall towards him, laying your cheek on the lapel of his suit. It’s warm.

You feel Jungkook stilling in his position at your sudden action, but soon enough, he does nothing to pry you off like you feared for a moment he would, tightening his arms around your waist and swinging you both in that kind of laxed way.

Shutting your eyes close, you let the soft melody of the song ease your nerves, basking in Jungkook’s presence and his familiar scent.

You stay like that for a while, and just when the song is coming to an end, you feel Jungkook’s breathe in your ears, his lips almost brushing to the tips of your ears when he says, “I’m sorry I didn’t say anything back then, but I really miss you too.”

You drank more champagne than you anticipated and it’s why you wobble your way into the bathroom to do some half-ass retouch. Just as when you were putting away your make-up, Nayeon comes out from one of the cubicles.

“Hey, you gorgeous, gorgeous girl,” She says with a huge smile, now changed into a much simpler dress, in contrast to her voluminous one earlier.

You mirror her grin, opening your arms wide to engulf her in a hug. “Hi to you too. Congrats again on the wedding. I’m so incredibly happy for you. You and Minhyuk are perfect.”

When Nayeon breaks apart from your hug, she looks at you closely. “I saw you with Jungkook earlier. Lots of people saw you two earlier.”

“What?”

“I mean… slow dancing to Will You Love Me Tomorrow in a weirdly intimate way was kind of insane, if you ask me.”

“Oh, uhm…” you feel blood rushing to your cheeks as you grow embarrassed at the thought of people catching you in that position. You remember after the song ended, you made up some excuse about going to the bathroom to pee and you did – but you pointedly tried to stay out of Jungkook’s sight ever since.

One step forward, three steps back.

“How are you two by the way?”

“We’re fine.” You say, giving her a reassuring smile.

Nayeon stares at you for a moment. Then, she sighs. “You’re not, are you?”

“No, we really are. We’re– we’re talking, right?” You point out.

“But… he’s moving out of your place.”

“Well, he needs a change of scenery. He’s been there for four years so he must be tired living there.”

Nayeon stares at you again and when you look at her face, your heart twinges as you see the disappointment written all over her features.

“I don’t understand you both, really. You have this… this beautiful thing going on and you’re choosing to ignore that? It’s obvious that you feel something for him, __. Just be honest with him and see where it goes. I know you two are pretending that everything’s fine but you’re both hurting each other and you’re acting like it’s nothing – it’s all just unnecessary angst at this point. What are you two doing?” Nayeon asks.

“I…”

“Come on, __. Do you really want to let each other go? Do you really want to drift apart? Because it’s been almost a month of pussyfooting. And I don’t know if you’re just expecting that your luck is not gonna run out, but it is going to. And I know you’re going to regret it.”

You stare at Nayeon while listening to her words. You don’t expect the sharp edges to her voice. You’ve always thought that if someone was going to call you out on your bullshit – it was going to be Doyeon. She’s the bluntest in the group and would not hesitate to tell someone if they’re being a bitch or not – so you don’t expect Nayeon to be like this at all because she’s always been a soft-spoken sweetheart.

It's not like Doyeon hasn’t been harsh, either, though. You had a drink with her and Taehyung a month ago and let’s just say she kind of ranted about you feeling like you’re in a romcom or something.

She shuts her eyes close, and you can just feel her frustration emanating. “I’m sorry – I know I’m being harsh right now. But I just can’t bear seeing you two like this. I just got married today and I feel like I’m learning and realizing so much right now and one of those is that I’m extremely lucky to have found someone I’m so sure of, and while Minhyuk was saying his vows I looked back at my past relationships and just thought that… that I’m so glad I was finally at that point and… and right now I can’t stop thinking about you two,” Nayeon sighs. “You two love each other so much. Everybody can see it. Why are you both running away from each other? What gives?”

You look away.

You both do love each other. They are right.

And while you can’t exactly say if what you feel for Jungkook right now bounds in being in love – there’s quite literally only one thing in the world that you’re certain of, and it’s that he’s the most important person to you – the only one you can think of spending a lifetime with and not get sick of it.

And that was something.

But…

“Because it’s scary.” You say, finally.

“What’s scary?”

You inhale a sharo breath.

“For eight years I’ve always thought that we were only platonic. But somewhere in my head I always thought that he was my soulmate, you know? I thought about us ending up together and I remember liking that thought. But years went by, and nothing ever happened and I swear I was happy with Eunwoo but you know what I’m ashamed of all this time that I never told anybody?” Your vision of Nayeon gets blurry as you begin tearing up. “I think… I have been in denial for so long. I think… I think I secretly looked for a part of Jungkook in Eunwoo and I think Eunwoo knew that. I think everybody who I’ve ever been with knew that except for myself. Because I was in denial. Even right now, I’m still in denial. You don’t know how – you don’t know how strange it is to suddenly wake up and realize that you don’t see your friend as a mere friend anymore. You don’t know how hard it is to overthink things – like what if it doesn’t work out and everything falls apart? Our friendship is so important to me, I hold it in the highest regard, and I don’t want anything to ever go against it. But now I’m doing that myself and I just… I hate it. But I don’t know what to do. Jungkook’s moving out just like it seems like he’s moving on and I’m scared that I’m too late to do anything.”

Your speech leaves Nayeon’s mouth agape, clearly not expecting your outburst. But she recovers quickly. She steps closer in front of you, and in a second, engulfs you in a hug.

“I’m sorry,” you sniff, making sure to not let your tears fall down her dress. “I think I’ve been keeping that for a long time.”

“It’s okay… I’m glad you said that.”

“Yeah… I think I’m glad too,” you both chuckle.

“__?”

You hum.

“Just talk to Jungkook. If you’re worried about him moving out, he’s not. I can tell you that much.”

You break the hug and look at Nayeon. “Nayeon, he literally has everything packed. I think he’s leaving early in the morning tomorrow.”

Nayeon fixes a strand of stray hairs from your hair framing your face. “Hm. He has?” You nod. “Well, as I said, he’s not leaving. Trust me. But you have to tell him everything that you told me just now. Be honest, __. It feels scary right now but, try to take a leap of faith, okay? This is not some toxic positivity shit or anything like that, but just be honest, alright?”

Nibbling on your bottom lip, you look at her hesitantly. “Are you… are you sure?”

Nayeon nods, and she looks so sure of herself that it may have fired up a little bit of hope in you.

The party is still ongoing, but you decide that it’s time for you to clock out. After you bid your goodbyes to Nayeon and her now husband, to Doyeon and to Taehyung, you head out of the venue to try and book a taxi. You couldn’t find Jungkook earlier at the party, so you decided to send him a text that says you were going home.

“Need a ride?”

The ever-familiar voice expectedly appears to be Jungkook when you look at him.

“Hey,” you greet. “No. I was just about to book an Uber.”

Jungkook’s brows furrow. You think he looks handsome under the moonlight. “We can ride together in my car. I’m going home as well.”

“N-no, no, ‘s really fine,” you wave your hand, emphasizing your point.

Jungkook grows more confused. Then: “Are you drunk?”

You wince, hating that he instantly knows right away.

“Sorta, kinda…”

“And you want to Uber?” You pout. You hear him scoff. “There’s no way I’m leaving you alone in this state. Okay, let’s get you to my car.”

“I’m fine, really,” you say but it sounds whiny even to your ears.

“You can be stubborn all you want. But in the passenger’s seat.” Jungkook gives you a sharp stare, but his hold on your wrist is gentle as he guides you to the parking lot.

He wears the seatbelt around your waist and lets you settle on your seat, rounding the car to get behind the wheel right after. You look away. You thought he'd be more... not nice to you since you just left him earlier with a poor excuse.

You feel guilty. So guilty. Jungkook is so... he makes you feel so loved but you're just... so confused. You're so scared it doesn't even make sense.

When he starts the engine, he asks, “Why did you drink so much?”

It's easy to ignore the heavy thoughts in your head when you're half-asleep at this point.

“I dunno. The champagne was so good… I bet it was probably expensive. I can’t have that much free stuff until –” you stop, as if remembering something, sitting upright. “When is Taehyung’s wedding?”

“He doesn’t have a wedding, ba—__. He hasn’t proposed to Hyerin yet.”

You slump in your chair hearing that.

“Why? They’re so perfect together… they should marry…” You say before dropping back down to your seat again. The AC in Jungkook’s car whirrs softly in your ear, and when you look to the side, you find yourself staring at his side profile.

He’s taken off his white coat, now left with a white shirt and his purple tie. He’s pushed the sleeves up to his forearms, showing the veins all over them.

“Jungkook.” you call him.

“What is it?” He says, momentarily looking at you before focusing back on the road.

“Can I…” you look at his hand. You sniff. “Can I hold your hand?”

Well, he does not expect that at all. But he smiles anyway, taking off one hand on the wheel and reaching for your own hand over the center console. You watch the way his huge palm dwarfs your own, and you almost sigh in relief when he laces his fingers with yours, squeezing your hand as he rests it over his thigh.

The last thing you hear is Jungkook’s soft chuckle before you completely drift off to sleep.

When you awake, you’re in your room. Seconds after regaining consciousness, you notice the banging in your head – and when you blearily open your eyes, reaching around for your phone, you don’t find it.

Groaning, you stand up from your bed, realizing you’re now in a shirt and some pajamas. But weirdly enough, you seem to still have your bra on.

You peek through the inside of your shirt and alas, the white lace of your bra from last night’s event welcomes you, and when you stretch the waistband of your shorts to check on your panties, you still adorn the pair of white thong, which means only one thing.

You haven’t changed completely out of the garments you’ve worn to Nayeon’s wedding and you wonder how it all happened. When you look to the side, your clutch is placed on the nightstand and so you grab it, relieved to find your phone there.

Shockingly, you read it’s only over 2 am.

With furrowed brows, you go over to the mirror to check your ensemble. Your face isn’t and doesn't feel as heavy with make-up as it was back at the venue, and you’re definitely dressed down now.

You remember passing out in Jungkook’s car after he insisted that you ride with him… and everything had been a blur since then.

Suddenly, an idea goes into your head.

Did Jungkook… change your clothes and remove your make-up? That’s the only plausible thing that you can consider because you honestly don’t remember ever dressing yourself or going to the bathroom to remove your make-up. And if you did change out of the gown, you would've opted out of your underwear as well.

Maybe Jungkook did all that.

And the thought makes you smile. But it drops just as quickly.

You head towards your door and go straight knocking on Jungkook’s bedroom.

You don’t expect him to be awake at this point, but when you hear steps coming your way and the doorknob clicking, you stare at Jungkook wide-eyed when he welcomes you with his presence behind the door.

“Hey,” He greets, predictably surprised to see you. “You’re awake.”

“Yeah…” your eyes don’t mean to subtly roam his room. Then that’s when you catch it. The bags lying around his bedroom floor and the neatly piled boxes to the side. Your eyebrows meet each other. “You’re packing?”

Jungkook nods. “I’m leaving tomorrow, I told you that, didn’t I?”

“Y-you did, yeah.” You stammer, blinking at him. You suddenly feel like throwing up. “Well, I just came to thank you for…” you trail off, gesturing to your clothes.

Seemingly getting what you mean, Jungkook’s lips curl up into a coy smile. “I hope you don’t mind. I tried to wake you up, but you were complaining about your dress when you were sleeping…”

“Yeah… I’m glad you took it off.” You wince. “That sounds wrong. Anyway, the make-up, too. I have to ask, did I throw up on you?”

Jungkook laughs, incredulous. “No, no, you didn’t. Are you seriously worried about that?”

“I just feel bad.” You give him a tight-lipped smile.

“It’s okay. You should sleep now, it’s late. Do you have a shift tomorrow– or later, actually.”

“Yeah, I do. But it’s the evening shift. So. You?”

“I have the morning until three in the afternoon.”

Nodding, you ask, “Are you leaving at three then? I mean, to your new place?”

“Yeah. Will just pass by here to get some of my stuff.”

You try to look for something on his face. But Jungkook looks casual at best. Now you remember what Nayeon told you. Was she lying when she said you’re going to convince Jungkook not to move out? Because from the looks of it, Jungkook doesn’t seem like anything would budge him from leaving tomorrow. He seems so set on a mission, and you can’t lie and say that it doesn’t break your heart.

You find yourself thinking about the events at the reception party. How he threw you a quick prom, told you you were beautiful… how he said he missed you.

Was that all a lie? Just something he said to avoid some sort of dead air?

Because if he truly misses you, then why would he leave?

You find yourself getting annoyed.

“I’ll be back to my room.” You say to get out of the situation. You notice Jungkook getting taken aback by the change of your tone, even more so when you turn on your heels quickly to take the two strides it takes you to your own bedroom.

In there, you throw yourself on the mattress, the impact affecting you a little bit. You must still be drunk because you feel your vision getting blurry a bit but as you quickly shut and open your eyes, everything goes back to normal.

You sigh.

Well, maybe you’re actually meant to be alone and it’s true that you’re not meant for any romantic relationships. You’ll die alone and you’ll just have to deal with the heartbreaks you went through your whole life.

A stray tear escapes your eye, and you quickly raise the back of your hand to wipe at it. You glare at the wall dividing your and Jungkook’s rooms, finding it annoying that you’re not really mad at him. It’d be so easy if you were mad at him… but you have no reason to.

But why is he so stubborn? Why isn’t he saying anything? Can he just… can it just be him who takes the leap of faith, so you won’t have to? You know that’s unfair, though. It’s juvenile.

In a burst of courage, you take one pillow from your bed and stomp your way out of your bedroom, finding yourself in front of Jungkook’s room again and knocking.

He opens it, rightfully surprised to see you again. “H-hey, __, I thought—”

“Can I sleep here?”

You can see the way his face contorts into confusion. “What?”

“Can I sleep in your room?” You reiterate, but you’re already forcing your way in. You throw your pillow on his own heap of dark ones, frowning when you see the bags on the floor. “Are you just going to pack forever? You’ve been packing since yesterday.”

Your clipped tone throws Jungkook off a little bit, but he doesn’t point that out, though, when he speaks. “No. I’m actually done now.”

“Okay? Well, then, let’s sleep.” You say, staring at him. He looks stoned in his position from the edge of the bed, so utterly confused.

“Are you… still drunk?”

“What? No.”

“O… kay?” Jungkook looks extra cautious when he seats himself on the mattress by your feet. “Are you sure?”

“About what?”

“I don’t know. About not being drunk and… sleeping here.”

“Yeah,” you answer, pointing out the obvious. “Why are you acting like we haven’t had sleepovers before? You used to sleep in my room when there was a spider in your closet.”

Jungkook makes a face. “It was a huge spider.”

You roll your eyes, going into a lying position, making sure to leave some space for him on the side. “Jungkook.”

“Okay, I’m going. So demanding.”

He playfully clicks his tongue as he lays on the bed as well, sliding his body across the mattress. He doesn’t expect the way you take his arm to spread it on your side of the bed, and you don’t let him say another word when you lay your head on it, keeping your hands close to your chest as you snuggle beside him.

You could feel there was a moment there that Jungkook stiffened for a bit, but he relaxes just as quickly, feeling him caress your head tentatively as if feeling you out before he goes for it completely.

“This is what you’re gonna be missing out on when you move out.” you mumble.

You’re grateful when he only says: “Hm?”

“Nothing.” You open your eyes and because of the close proximity, your eyes are at the level of the side view of his chest, and you see the way his thin white shirt clings to his body, rising up and down with his breathing. “I saw your keys earlier. I’m glad you like the Claddagh.”

Jungkook laughs. “The Claddagh, huh? I knew you knew what that keychain meant,” You frown when you realize you were supposed to pretend you didn’t know that. Oh, well, he figured you out right away, anyway. “I really like it, by the way. It was very thoughtful,” Jungkook says. You can’t see him in your position, but you just know he has a smile on his face. He sounds like it.

“Thank you. I thought about gifting you a watch… but watches are expensive, so…” You decide to joke, and Jungkook laughs which makes you smile.

“I would choose the Claddagh any day. I just… I really like it. I interpreted it as a deep sense of belonging and shared history, and I’ve known you for eight years, so that seems very fitting. I’m glad you chose to give me that.”

It was also a reminder of your relationship. Your love for each other. The loyalty that lies in its foundation, and how you’ve managed to build that over the years. Jungkook’s ultimately your soulmate – that you’re sure of – even though that’s a bit of a cliche and you don’t exactly believe in it entirely. A bit of a conflict, really, since you’re a hopeless romantic.

But you’ve long known that you and Jungkook are more than just friends. You trust and respect each other beyond words – and it’s more than what you could say about your previous romantic partners. Sure, there was that sense of admiration for one another with your ex-boyfriends, but Jungkook is different. He’s always been different.

You’ve known that all along – but it’s only now that you decided to read between the lines.

And you want to tell him that. So badly. But you choose to let the gentle tips of his fingers lull you to that comfortable annexe of warmth, easing you from overwhelming thoughts.

Has Jungkook always felt like the embodiment of comfort for you? Has he always felt like everything good you can imagine having in your life?

Then, you feel him lean down to the top of your head. “You smell so nice. You aren’t my soulmate after all.”

That makes you violently crane your neck up to look at him. “What?”

“There was this article that Tae sent to me. It was from Cosmo, I think. It says you’re not supposed to be able to smell your soulmate.” He says, looking so serious that you can’t figure if he’s bullshitting you.

You lean on your elbow so you can look down properly at him, saying, “That’s not even plausible. Since when was Cosmo reliable to you? That’s ridiculous. We literally have four hundred different types of olfactory receptors which help us perceive various smells – I mean, unless you’ve damaged them somehow, or there’s a disruption in your signal transduction, or you’re anosmic – which I know you’re not – then I don’t think that’s true.”

Jungkook laughs and you can’t help but frown.

“It made sense, okay? If you ignore the science stuff.”

“You’re a doctor.” You quickly counter.

He rolls his eyes. “I mean, for the record, I believe in the existence of extraterrestrial life, so that’s that.”

“Ugh,” you flop down on the bed again, falling back on Jungkook’s body. He scoots closer to hold you close against him, which you welcome casually. You don’t even know how you got this comfortable, but you’re glad either way. He feels so big and warm. “Are you going to show me that Youtube video of top ten UFO sightings around the world again?”

“You don’t think that Nebraska one looked very real?” Jungkook says with disbelief.

“No,” you turn to Jungkook only to find him already looking at you. “They were college boys, Jungkook. They probably just turned nineteen or something. Have you seen their eyes in the video? It was pixelated as hell, but if I were that high—”

Jungkook suddenly snorts, effectively cutting you off. “Ohh, if you were that high?”

You jab at his chest which only makes him laugh louder.

“I tried my first weed with you.” You pout.

Jungkook catches the stray hair that falls from behind your ear and hides it back there again as he says, “You coughed nonstop and had a sore-throat the next day. You have baby lungs.”

You roll your eyes and go back to lying on his arm. “Whatever. All of that still doesn’t justify that we’re not soulmates.”

“The concept of soulmates doesn’t even have a scientific explanation.” Jungkook chuckles.

“No…? But there's psychological research about it; the attachment theory, look it up.”

“There’s also cognitive dissonance.” Jungkook pitches in.

“That’s so mean!” You gasp, but you know Jungkook’s only teasing when you see that he’s got that huge stupid grin on his face.

He apologizes in between his laughter, squeezing your waist a bit before he says, “Okay, okay. But what if you’re my soulmate, but I’m not yours?”

“That’s not how soulmate-ism works. Isn’t it nice to think that there’s like a system to it? Like if you’re my soulmate, then that would automatically make me your soulmate. It doesn’t make sense otherwise.” Your eyebrows knit together as you explain.

“I guess you’re right…” Then you hear him letting out a loud sigh. “For what it's worth, I think I’d be really happy if I was your soulmate.”

You smile against his pec after he says the words.

You like Jeon Jungkook. You like him so much it’s starting to feel unbearable.

There’s silence that hangs in the air for some time before you look up at Jungkook alarmingly. “Kook.” He doesn’t say anything. You lean on your elbow again to peer down at him, only to see that he’s now closed his eyes. “Jungkook.”

Finally, he stirs. But his eyes are still closed. “Hm?”

“Don’t sleep yet.”

“Uh-huh.” He gives your waist a brief squeeze again.

“I’m watching you.”

He chuckles. “What is it?”

“Let’s talk more.”

“How are you still not sleepy?”

“Because…” you drop your head down to his chest this time. “I want to know if you could ever —” you shrug, staring at his ceiling. “—cannibalize someone.”

“I like this. Conversation’s getting raunchy,” You hear him snorting through his breath. “Is this your pillowtalk?”

“Yes.”

“In that case, that’s an interesting question. I have never really thought about that.”

“Really? Never?”

“I’ve never been in any situation where I had to think about that, thank god.”

You laugh together. “Okay, but if you really had to, would you?”

“I don’t know… I’m a huge germaphobe, you know that. But I guess humans inherently have indomitable spirits and that conditions us to do whatever it takes to ensure our survival under extreme conditions. I don’t think I’m beyond that.”

You nod against his chest. Mindlessly, you start tracing random lines over his shirt, and you wait for Jungkook to pry your hand off or say something to stop you or ask you what you’re doing, but he doesn’t really say anything.

“It’s fascinating, right? The way we can just alter our brains and mindsets when we’re put under certain conditions. It’s amazing and weird at the same time how we work psychologically.”

“Exactly.” You feel Jungkook nodding.

“This is– of course this is not an extreme condition where I have to cannibalize someone,” you chuckle, which earns the same thing from Jungkook. You continue, “but you know when you’re experiencing a heartbreak and you think it’s the end of the world but then you wake up one day and suddenly you’re fine?

When Jungkook turns quiet, you know you’ve touched on a subject that feels personal.

You sigh. “I broke up with Mingyu awhile ago.”

“Oh.”

You hum. “Yeah… like a month ago?”

“Ah. I had a hunch.”

“But you didn’t ask,” you smile. “Well, anyway I just want you to know.”

Silence.

Then, “Do you feel… do you feel sad about it?”

“That’s what’s weird,” you say. “Because I don’t necessarily feel sad about the break-up, or the relationship. But it’s more like – the thought of breaking up with somebody again.” You chuckle, but there’s no humor to it. “I feel like you can only take so many break-ups in your life before you completely give up on love, you know? And it’s like… I don’t even get it… I mean, I’m decent, aren’t I? I can hold up a conversation, I make sense, I have a good job, and I don’t look bad – although, maybe that’s what’s wrong all along?” You swallow the lump in your throat. “Am I ugly?”

“Hey,” Jungkook calls, and you feel him rising from his lying position just as you feel tears slowly streaming down your face.

You scold yourself for it – because what the hell even is this about? Just earlier you were talking about cannibalism and now you’re tearing up. Your emotions are all over the place, and it doesn’t help that Jungkook’s quick to dote on you, guiding your back as you both sit on the bed instead.

You inhale a sharp breath. “Look at me, I’m a mess,” you look at him through blurry eyes, hoping to look apologetic at the very least for barging in his room at fuckass o’clock and disturbing his packing and not noticing that he’s been in love with you for the past eight years. God, you want to say sorry for a lot of things. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why I’m crying, it’s not that deep.”

“If it’s bothering you then it’s a big deal. And I’m looking right at you,” Jungkook wraps an arm around your shoulders as he looks you in the eyes. “I’m looking at you and you’re beautiful, you’re intelligent, and you’re the funniest person on Earth I’ve ever had the pleasure of knowing. I’m so glad I met you.”

“Well… do you still feel that way when I only ever seem to come to you when I wanna vent or cry?” You ask, attempting to joke, but your voice breaks at the end.

It cracks a smile on Jungkook’s face though. “That’s not true at all. You also come to annoy me.”

Your laughter turns into a sob and that’s when Jungkook wraps an arm around your shoulder to pull you close to his side, letting your head fall to his bicep and resting his chin on top of yours. It’s a barely-there gesture, but you’re pretty sure you feel him kiss the crown of your head.

“I know… I know we still have a lot to talk about, __. That we’re glossing over the important things. But I want to say sorry. I never said sorry about what happened back at the resort. For Mingyu. For doing what we did. I never said sorry about bombarding you with all those things and for taking so long to talk to you just because I was scared. But right now, I’m saying sorry. I have been completely unfair to you all this time.”

You quickly get out of his hold to look up at him. “No, you—”

“Just…” Jungkook cuts you off. “Just let me, okay? I know you’re gonna say none if it was my fault but you’re right about what you said. You’re right about doubting my feelings for you.”

“Jungkook…”

He nods. “I was in denial for the most part about my feelings for you. Ever since that thing happened with Jiyeon in college, I found it hard to trust somebody again. I slept around in my last year of college because it made me feel good about myself, made me think I was desirable and that someone cheating on me doesn’t mean shit when I had all those women who willingly slept with me. I was like that during my first year in med school, too. Couldn't really get serious with somebody because – because what if they do the same thing again?” Jungkook smiles bitterly. “And then… I met you. It started out as a crush and I was so sure it wasn’t going to be more than that, but then, we were in almost the same classes and we became friends,” Jungkook looks at you fondly and you almost melt in his arms. “And then I found myself liking you, and then I fell hard – really fucking hard,” he chuckles to himself. “It was during spring break of second year when I realized I was fucked and that I was in love with my best friend.”

“S-spring break?” You whisper, not sure what he meant.

“You don’t remember it?” Jungkook asks. He looks over your face and suddenly he’s caressing your cheek with his fingers. He swipes his thumb over it, wiping a stray tear away. He smiles before he says, “I caught the flu that time. I called you, but you were over at your parents. Then the next day I woke up and you were at my place telling me to take care of my health because how can I study medicine when my immune system is shit.”

“Oh, that…” you trail off. Suddenly, the fragments of that time become clear to you. The flu wasn’t that bad, only took him three days to fully recover.

“Yeah. But then that was also the time when you told me Eunwoo asked you to be his girlfriend and that you said yes.”

You inhale a shaky breath.

“I– I tried to forget about my feelings, because I didn’t want to harbor all those feelings for you when you already had a boyfriend. I went to all those dates in the hopes that I could feel something from someone. I tried to date Sora. It was good. It was a good partnership. But then… Eunwoo proposed, and I don’t know – I guess I deluded myself so bad that I have fully moved on from you since then – but then I was faced with the reality that you were going to spend your life with somebody else and I didn’t know how to deal with it. I was so bad at handling my emotions. So stupid. Sora broke up with me because she figured I love you.”

You stare at him with your mouth agape. You would've never guessed why they broke up. You always thought they were so perfect for each other…

“And yeah, the break-up with Eunwoo happened and it took you two years to heal. I didn’t want to make a move because I simply didn’t want to be that kind of guy who takes advantage of a woman’s vulnerability after a break-up, you know? And we moved in together two years ago and…” You wait as he trails off. “I guess I just got comfortable with our set-up.”

“How do you mean?”

“It was like, everything I imagined us to be. Living together, sharing everything together. I thought no one could take that away from me, even if I didn’t ask you out. I’m not telling you to believe it, but I wasn’t with a lot of women for the past two years… yeah, sure, I dated them very briefly, but it was out of genuine attempt to find somebody for myself because I didn’t want to ruin our friendship by confessing. Being your best friend was and still is more important to me than being your boyfriend. I couldn’t care less how I can have you; I want you in any way – and if that meant being your platonic friend the rest of our time, then I was that. I am that. Even now.”

You can’t find your words. You’ve imagined your talk countless times in your head, but they all fell short to give you a taste of what the real thing would be like.

“So… I’m sorry. I’m sorry for keeping my feelings for nearly eight years. I’m sorry I kept something important to you about Mingyu. I’m sorry I didn’t say anything sooner. Just… I apologize. I feel like I broke your trust.”

It’s quiet for a while before you break the silence.

“Jungkook,” You call him. He meets your gaze. It’s soft and it’s sweet and you realize he’s always looked at you like that. How could you have not noticed? “You’re very important to me.”

“I’m glad.” He smiles. A small one that makes him look all boyish. The urge to keep him in your pocket even though he’s much bigger than you becomes huge.

“And I want you in any way, too.” You say, staring intently at him.

You watch as Jungkook stares back at you. There’s an agonizing stretch of seconds when you see his eyes darting down from your eyes to your lips, and you don’t mean to bite the bottom one, suddenly feeling the thick tension rising in the air.

“Can I hug you?” You swallow the lump in your throat.

“I would really love that.”

You don’t know how it happens, but the last thing you see is Jungkook’s wall clock pointing to 3:15 am before you let your eyes rest.

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this chapter is not over yet! tumblr has a 1k paragraph/block limit in a single post and so i can't put the whole thing in this. please look thru the reblogs to read the last scene of the chapter and the EPILOGUE or click on this [ link ]

#jungkook smut #jungkook fluff #jungkook angst #jungkook x reader #jungkook scenarios #jungkook imagines #bts smut #bts fluff #jeon jungkook x reader #fic: tlp #awrkive

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ventismacchiato · 2 months ago

Text

16 stuck with you — im so obsessed with your ex !

scaramouche x gender neutral reader

“It’s finally happening,” Yae sighs with a gleam in her eye, practically floating into the dorms. She sits next to Scara on the couch, her excitement palpable. “The three mystery guests are arriving! Finally, some drama!”

“I feel like there’s been enough drama,” Aether mutters.

“This will take the cake,” Yae giggles, clearly delighting in the upcoming chaos. “Trust me.”

“I think I’ll just stay here then,” Scara mutters, sinking deeper into the couch, his arms crossed tightly as he tries to resist the inevitable.

“Not so fast,” Yae says, “I need you there, especially.”

“She’s scaring me,” Yoimiya pipes up with a nervous laugh, inching her way toward the bedrooms, clearly trying to make a quick exit.

“Come on, enough chitchat,” Yae declares, standing up. She grabs Scara by the shoulder and yanks him up off the couch, practically dragging him by his feet. “I think the guests are situated.”

As you all make your way down to the beach and head toward the kitchens, you can't shake the uneasy feeling sitting in your chest. You’d known guests were going to join the main lot for the show, but no one ever told you who they could be.

“Oh my god, is that Diluc?” Lumine pipes up as Childe begins to fix his unkempt hair in response.

“Oh, hell no,” Scara mutters, his face immediately twisting with disgust as he takes one look at the scene in front of him. His instinct is to turn and leave, but Yae grabs him by the shoulder and pulls him forward, much to his annoyance.

“Is that my ex?” you say in disbelief, glancing at the table. His burgundy hair was recognizable even from how far you were standing. At the same time, everyone in Delusion turns to you, their eyes wide.

“Since when did you have an ex?” Aether asks, genuinely curious. Even Scara looks over at you now, his gaze lingering a little longer than you expected.

“Heizou and I had... a thing for a while,” you murmur, suddenly feeling awkward. “It was more of a situationship. How did you find out, Yae?”

“Research, baby,” Yae says smugly, clearly enjoying this too much.

“What kind of research?” you ask, eyebrow raised.

“Xiao. We asked Xiao.”

“She loves to gossip,” Xiao adds offhandedly, giving a shrug that seems almost apologetic.

“This is great,” Yae exclaims, her eyes lighting up as if she’s already imagining the chaos. “Let’s have some jealousy arcs!”

“I need to drown, I need to drown right now,” Scara mutters in exasperation, visibly agitated. He pulls his arm away from Yae’s grasp. “Please, just let me go.”

Even you’ve never seen him that agitated around you.

“Hush, it won’t be that bad,” Yae says, pulling him along like a petulant child despite his protests. The rest of the group follows hesitantly behind.

The tension in the air thickens as the group walks into the dining area. The three figures sitting at the table come into full view. Mona is sitting nearest to the door, her posture more relaxed than you would have expected, while Heizou is across her, looking just a bit too calm for comfort.

Her eyes immediately fall on Scara, and she offers him a gentle smile. It’s sincere but carries a hint of hesitation.

“Scara,” Mona begins softly, her voice almost tender. “It’s been a long time since we’ve met, hasn’t it?”

It’s clear she’s trying to be civil, maybe even friendly, but Scara is having none of it.

“Yeah, not long enough,” Scara mutters as Yae pushes him into the chair beside her.

Meanwhile, you sit yourself next to Heizou, which is coincidentally also right across from Scara. Heizou looks as unbothered as ever, though you notice how his gaze flicks between you and Scara.

“So... long time no see,” Heizou says, speaking in a neutral tone, trying to ease the tension in the room. He flashes one of his smiles, pretending not to care about the undercurrent of discomfort between everyone. “How have things been? You know, outside of... whatever this is.”

You can’t help but chuckle at how easily you slip back into conversation with him. You can’t help but notice the way he leans just a little too close when he says that last part, like he’s testing the waters.

“Things have been fine,” you reply, your tone playful, “And you?”

“I'm doing better now,” he smiles, his eyes trailing you for a second. You feel your ears burn under his gaze.

Meanwhile, Childe, who’s been awkwardly sitting beside Diluc perks up, “Hey, uh, I like your music,” Childe says, his voice unexpectedly shy as he glances over at Diluc.

Diluc, who’s normally a man of few words, gives a rare smile, his expression softening. “Thank you,” he replies in his low, gentle voice, making Childe shift in his seat.

“So... uh, you like being an idol?” Childe continues, his words tripping over themselves in an effort to keep the conversation going.

Aether, sitting next to him, raises an eyebrow, clearly amused by the sudden shift in Childe’s usual extroverted self. “Wow, you’re really wooing him, huh?”

“Shut up!” Childe hisses, elbowing Aether in the ribs, his face flushed. “I’m trying!”

୨୧✧

The rest of breakfast goes on in a strained silence. Scara refuses to even glance at Mona, his arms crossed tightly and his eyes fixed on his plate. He’s not engaging with anyone.

On the other hand, you and Heizou are catching up, your easy back-and-forth making the tension at the table feel a little less suffocating. So much so you don’t even realize Scara’s listening in on it.

Heizou, with his usual calm smile, picked up a blueberry tart and slid it across the table toward you. “I remember you really liked these,” he said, his voice warm and casual. “So, I asked them to bring some for you.”

Scara, who had been uncharacteristically quiet all morning, suddenly spoke up. His voice was flat, and his gaze remained fixed on his plate. “Yn doesn’t like blueberries.”

The words hung in the air, and for a moment, the room fell silent. Every eye turned toward Scara, the unexpected interruption making the tension in the air feel even heavier. Scara, clearly aware of all the attention, slowly lifted his eyes, his expression unreadable.

Heizou’s polite smile didn’t falter, but there was a hint of confusion in his tone. “Yes, they do. I used to gift them to them during our trainee days, right?”

He looked at you, his eyes searching for confirmation. But you, suddenly feeling like the weight of the room was on you, couldn’t meet his gaze. You shifted uncomfortably in your seat and looked down at the tart in your hands.

“Actually,” you said, sheepish, “I’m not very fond of blueberries.”

Heizou blinked, clearly surprised, and for the first time, his smile faltered. “...Oh.”

Scara, who’d been content to stay silent up until now, couldn’t help the smug grin tugged at the corners of his lips. “Told you.”

“And why do you care?” Heizou asks, raising a brow at Scara.

Scara, leaning back in his chair with his arms crossed, looked entirely unbothered. “I don’t want to see them gag at the dinner table,” he said dryly, glancing at Heizou for the first time. “I’m already losing my appetite sitting across from you.”

The table fell silent again, the weight of Scara’s words hanging heavy in the air. You couldn’t help but notice the way Heizou’s smile tightened, as though his polite exterior was beginning to crack. He leaned back, trying to brush it off, but you could see the slight strain in his shoulders from the tension Scara’s jab had caused.

“…Whatever,” Heizou muttered, though you could tell Scara had bothered him, turning back to you. “What did you do with all the tarts I gave you then?”

“I gave them to Venti,” you admitted, still feeling a little awkward.

Venti, ever the enthusiastic one, raised his hand with a mouthful of tart. “They were good!”

For a moment, the tension in the room dissolved into awkward chuckles, but you could feel the remnants of discomfort still lingering. You couldn’t ignore seeing the flash of hurt in Heizou’s eyes upon realizing you didn’t enjoy his gifts. That man had bought you a lot of blueberry related snacks.

On the other hand, Scara seemed less tense after his squabble with Heizou.

The awkwardness lingered, but before anyone could say anything further, Mona, who had been quietly watching the scene unfold, spoke up. “Yn, I also don’t like blueberries that much.”

Scara scooped his plate forward, pushing his untouched blueberries onto Mona’s plate. Without a word, he walked out of the room, leaving a trail of silence in his wake as everyone wrapped up their breakfast.

Mona remained unfazed by the small act of defiance, simply getting up from the table and following suit.

After breakfast, Yae gathered everyone around outside with her usual enthusiastic flair. Well, gathered might be too generous a term since she practically herded you all together. She had to ask the film crew to chase down Scara who was surprisingly athletic when it came to escaping Yae’s stupid games. Well, game was a strong word for whatever this was. It was all rigged from the start, Yae wasn’t about to pass up an opportunity to get you and Scara paired with your exes on live television.

"Could you at least pretend to smile?" Yae sighed, pointing to her lips in an attempt to show him as Scara leaned back, clearly not interested in playing along.

"No," Scara deadpanned, scooting further away from Mona.

“Fine, if you won’t sit by her, at least go sit by Yn,” Yae quipped, clearly amused at his indifference.

Surprisingly, Scara did exactly that, stepping over to your side. Seems he found you more tolerable than her.

Yae clapped her hands, clearly pleased with herself, and shot a thumbs-up toward the film crew. "Alright, are we all set?" she asked, the microphone in her hand now buzzing with static. "Okay, contestants!" Her voice rang out, louder than before, making everyone jump a little. "We’ll have a quick challenge to see which two couples get to go on a date at Paradise's carnival!”

She lowered the mic, cupping it with her palm and muttering, “Obviously, we need those four to win this,” gesturing at you, Scara, Heizou, and Mona. She paused before continuing with a sigh. “But I’ll get everyone else catering to make up for it.”

"I keep getting my hopes up and forgetting this is all rigged," Childe moaned dramatically from the sidelines, earning a laugh from Diluc, who patted him on the back.

Yae rolled her eyes but wasn’t fazed. She raised the mic again, her voice returning to its enthusiastic pitch. “Alright, time for a little competition to earn your prize! You guys are going to participate in a quick trivia game about each other!"

You didn’t want to win this, especially not when it involved a fake date, but it was becoming clear there was no escaping it.

The teams were set up, and you ended up paired with Heizou, while Scara was stuck with Mona. Yae started her rounds, and the questions were as ridiculous as you expected. It wasn’t a serious trivia challenge, but that didn’t make it any less awkward whenever it was your turn. Everyone else was having fun answering, unlike you. You should’ve known most of the answers about Heizou, but your mind was surprisingly blank on all the details you used to remember.

“Yn, what’s the name of Heizou’s first album?” Yae asked.

You blinked, then grimaced. “Oooh, can I get a new question?” you asked, trying to deflect.

“It’s called After Hours,” Yae instructed, her voice a little too chipper. "Just say that, and we'll move on."

You hesitated, then awkwardly repeated, “After Hours.”

“Correct!” Yae singsonged, moving on without missing a beat.

You shot Heizou with a sheepish look. “Sorry. I swear I did listen to your album... it just... slipped my mind.”

Heizou chuckled, though there was a hint of hesitation in his smile. “It’s fine. Honestly, I wouldn’t have remembered the title of yours either if I didn’t see it sitting on my shelf every day.”

You blinked, surprised. “You bought my album?”

Heizou shrugged casually. “Yeah, why? Did you not buy mine?”

You pause, “I was broke when I first debuted,” you awkwardly reply, suddenly feeling rather guilty.

“Don’t worry about it,” Heizou answers, looking the other way.

Meanwhile, Scara was making a game out of trying to tank his answers, but Yae didn’t even bat an eye. She was too busy setting up the drama.

“Now, Scara, what’s Mona’s stage name?” Yae asked, shooting him a smile.

Scara barely looked up, “Stardust?” he says with a bored tone, flicking his gaze to the ceiling like he couldn’t care less.

“Correct!” Yae cheered, almost too enthusiastically.

Lumine, sitting nearby, raised an eyebrow. “Won’t people know this is fake? It’s Astra, isn’t it?” she pipes up, “That wasn’t even close.”

Yae waved her hand dismissively. “We’ll voiceover the correct answers later. Don’t worry about it.”

“Okay, bonus points for anyone who gets this!” Yae announced with a sly grin. “If any of your four, apart from Scara, can answer this right, I’ll cut your awkward date short on the island.” Yae adds, looking at you, clearly not expecting you too.

“What was Scara going to originally name his debut album?” She asks, grinning.

“How the hell are we supposed to know that?” Mona muttered, glancing at you, only to be interrupted by your sudden answer.

“Meet Me at Midnight,” you said, almost instinctively, before you even realized what you’d said.

Yae’s eyes widened, a look of disappointment on her face. “That’s correct!” she gasped, then immediately slapped a hand to her forehead. “Wait, why did I bet on that one?”

Scara turned to look at you, genuinely surprised.

“How do you know that but not my debut album?” Heizou asks with a surprised laugh.

You shrugged, trying to play it off. “I remember because I told him it was a terrible name for an album,” you said, looking at Scara. “Now it’s just called Midnights.”

“It was an alright name,” Scara mumbles to himself.

“Sure it was.”

Yae, already over it, clapped her hands with exaggerated enthusiasm. “And that wraps up our trivia game!” She paused for dramatic effect. “The top four contestants are... Yn, Scaramouche, Mona, and Heizou!” She feigns a gasp as everyone rolls their eyes, “What a twist! You four will be off to the island soon for a double date!”

As everyone else started discussing what food to get Yae to cater, you could feel the weight of your fate hanging over you.

୨୧✧

After the game, everyone else heads back to the dorms for some free time, while the four of you are left to awkwardly prepare for your double date. You couldn’t think of anything more awkward as Yae explained how you guys would be spending the day at the carnival on Paradise. Just great.

Once everyone is gathered outside, Jean approaches with a clipboard in hand.

“So, we need to figure out if you four want to take the helicopter or the boat with the crew to the island,” Jean announces, his voice carrying her usual professional tone, unlike Yae who was having a little too much fun.

Your heart sinks at the mention of the helicopter. You try to act casual, shifting your weight from one foot to the other, but you feel your stomach knot. Scara notices the subtle change in your demeanor.

Heizou speaks up with an excited grin. “Wouldn’t the helicopter be a nicer view? Plus, it’s quicker.”

Mona, standing beside him, nods in agreement, her smile sweet and sincere. “I think the helicopter would be lovely,” she says, her eyes flicking toward Scara. It’s a small, calculated glance. You can’t help but feel a pang of discomfort.

You force yourself to keep a neutral expression, trying not to give away how uncomfortable you feel. You hate flying. The last time you were in a helicopter, you barely made it through without a panic attack. And Scara had been there to witness it. You don’t want to relive that embarrassing moment, especially not with Heizou and Mona around.

Clearing your throat, you try to sound casual, although your voice betrays you with a slight tremor. “I’ll just go on the boat, if that’s okay,” you say, not looking at anyone directly. There. Perfectly played. Totally.

Heizou gives you an amused look. “Oh? Your loss,” he says with a grin, his tone light and teasing. “The helicopter’s way more scenic.”

But then, to your surprise, Scara speaks up, his voice flat as always. “I’ll take the boat too,” he mutters, already turning away as if the conversation had never mattered to him. He starts walking toward the dock without another word.

You blink, taken aback. Mona looks at Scara in surprise, clearly expecting him to choose the faster, more fun option. But Scara just keeps walking, his footsteps heavy with disinterest. He doesn’t look back.

Jean shrugs, unfazed. “Alright then. We’ll all meet at the carnival on the other island.” She gestures for the crew to follow you two, and the tension seems to dissipate as everyone moves on to their respective transport.

You follow without saying anything, still processing Scara’s response. It wasn’t like he had to take the boat. He could’ve gone with Mona. And yet, here he was, going with you.

Once aboard the boat, the sunlight shimmers across the water, making everything feel a little more serene. The boat rocks gently beneath your feet, and you settle in, stealing glances at Scara, who’s staring out at the horizon with his usual unreadable expression. His posture, though, seems stiffer than usual.

“Thanks for coming on the boat,” you say, breaking the silence. Your voice sounds too loud against the stillness of the water, and for a moment, you regret even saying it. The awkwardness of it hangs between you like an unwanted presence.

Scara doesn’t answer immediately. His eyes stay fixed on the water, but after a few beats, he finally shrugs. “Didn’t wanna sit next to Mona,” he mutters lowly, as if the answer is self-explanatory.

“Alright,” you reply, though the simple response feels like it doesn’t quite cover the weight of the situation. But still, you can’t ignore the fact that he chose to sit with you instead of her. “But still.”

You had been disappointed when Heizou boarded the helicopter without you, but you didn’t blame him. Things had been rather awkward since breakfast, and there was no way to get around it.

Scara shifts in his seat, his eyes flicking toward the water as he says, “Whatever. It’s fine. You don’t have to thank for shit like this.” His voice is as nonchalant as ever, but you can sense there’s more to it. You don’t push it though, choosing to remain quiet, happy just to have the ground beneath your feet. After all, not dangling thousands of feet in the air is a small victory.

୨୧✧

You arrive a bit later than Heizou and Mona, who are already waiting for you both on the island, standing near the carnival entrance.

“Alright, Yae and I will be on the boat while you four go on your date, in your ears,” Jean explains, skimming through what was on her clipboard. “Just go explore the carnival together, and please, try to keep it civil.” Her gaze lingers on Heizou and Scara as she says that last part.

“Actually, I think they’re adding some good drama,” Yae whispers to Jean, her voice carrying a playful note.

“There’s a line between drama and full on fighting,” Jean sighs, clearly unamused.

Once the film crew is situated, Yae starts her spiel again, her voice ringing out through a mic.

“Alright, the winning pairs have arrived and will be having their double date here at Paradise's carnival!” Yae says enthusiastically. “You four must stick together as you explore the attractions! No running off now! Have fun!” she singsongs.

“Where to first?” Heizou hums, his eyes scanning the map board in front of you all.

“Maybe some games?” Mona suggests with a bright smile.

“Sure,” you reply, even though the idea of spending the day with your ex and Scara on a date makes your stomach twist in awkward knots. Scara, as usual, hangs back, his hands stuffed in his pockets as he follows behind the group with no real enthusiasm. You don’t blame him.

The smell of buttered popcorn and sugary cotton candy drifts through the air as you walk through the carnival. The place is mostly empty, though you suspect the company rented the space out just for you all. It’s quiet in a way that almost feels like a trap.

“This one looks fun,” you say, pointing to a ring toss game in front of you.

“Would you like to win something for your date?” The man working the booth asks Heizou, waving some rings around.

Heizou grins, catching your eye. “Sure, which plush is catching your eye, Yn?”

You glance at the display and point to a penguin plush. “I guess the penguin’s pretty cute.”

“Five tries,” the worker explains, handing Heizou the rings, “Three to win.”

Heizou takes the rings and tosses the first one, missing by a wide margin. One miss. Two miss. Three miss. Four miss. Five... another miss. Heizou manages to miss every single one, which, frankly, seems impressive in its own right. You start to wonder if the game is rigged.

Scara, who had been watching with mild amusement, can’t help but chuckle at Heizou’s pathetic attempts. Mona pats him on the back sympathetically, equally entertained.

“Sorry, Yn,” Heizou says with a sheepish grin, clearly embarrassed.

“It’s fine,” you say, rubbing him awkwardly on the shoulder.

“How about you?” The worker asks, nodding towards Scara. “Want to try and win your pretty lady something?”

“Win me the cat plush,” Mona says, folding her arms with a smirk as she glances over at Scara.

Scara rolls his eyes but takes the rings with a lazy flick of his wrist. His first throw barely makes it off his hand, landing miles away from the bottles.

“Oh no. I lost,” he says in his usual monotone voice, clearly throwing the game on purpose.

Even so, Heizou seizes the opportunity to provoke Scara. “See? You’re no better than me,” he teases, his voice light.

Scara gives him a glare as he raises his hand again. “Actually, I’ll take another round.”

One. Two. Three. Four. Five. He easily lands all five rings around the bottles. The worker blinks, clearly surprised.

The man reaches for the cat plush Mona had pointed to earlier, but Scara interrupts.

“That one.” He points to the penguin plush you had chosen earlier. His voice is flat, but you wonder if he’s doing it to spite you.

Instead he grabs the penguin and tosses it over to you without a word.

“At least one of us can actually win a plush,” he says, smirking at Heizou before walking off towards the next stall. Mona sighs and follows him.

You look down at the penguin in your hands, still processing what just happened. He’d won, but he’d also given it to you.

Every game after that is a repeat of the same pattern: Heizou trying (and failing) to win, and Scara effortlessly collecting plushies. By the time you leave the stall, you’re carrying an absurdly large pile of stuffed animals. You’re forced to hand them off to one of the cameramen just to be able to walk around. You almost feel guilty, offering Mona the cat plush she’d wanted earlier.

Soon, the date devolves into nothing more than Heizou and Scara making bets with each other as you and Mona trail behind, quietly watching them one-up each other in a strange unspoken rivalry.

“Hey,” Mona says, nudging you gently. “Let’s sneak away.” She nods towards the rides you haven’t touched yet. “You were eyeing the swings.”

You look over at Heizou and Scara, who are too absorbed in their competition to notice anything else. The worker at the fishing game is giving them a look of horror as they try to fish rubber ducks out of a tiny pool.

“You know what?” you say, relieved by the chance for a break. “Yeah, let’s go.”

She grabs your hand and tugs you along toward the swings, placing the cat plush between you two as you hop onto the ride.

As the swings start to rise, you glance over at Mona. She’s screaming with excitement. You can’t help but smile at her, but the smile quickly fades as you find yourself wondering about something. What happened between her and Scara? You know the basic gist of it from what your fans post on social media and from what gossip Xiao has passed on to you, but the Mona you’re seeing now feels oddly different from the one who’d dated Scara.

The ride slows, and you look down to see Heizou and Scara finally noticing that you’ve gone missing. Scara looks up, and you and Mona wave at him as the ride speeds past.

Once you’re off the ride, you suggest grabbing some snacks before Heizou and Scara catch up.

“Chocolate churros sound good?” you ask, already feeling the weight of the strange tension between the group. Mona agrees, walking up to the food stall to ask for a few.

You find a bench to settle on as you wait, the stillness between you and Mona only slightly alleviated by the warmth of the churros.

“Thanks for dragging me away,” you say, looking over at her. “I had fun.”

“No problem,” Mona hums, her voice light as she takes a bite. “Besides, I wanted to check out the rides too. And bonus, got to make Scara upset.”

You glance down at the churros at that, having the urge to ask her about what really went down between her and Scara. But it isn’t quite your place to ask.

Your train of thought is interrupted when Mona reaches out, brushing some chocolate off your lips.

“You got something…” she murmurs, her face much closer to yours than you expected.

You blink, caught off guard by how close she’s sitting to you. She seems so casual about it, but you start to wonder if she has a different intention than just being friendly.

“Huh?” you murmur, turning towards her.

“Shh,” she whispers, her palm caressing your cheek as she pulls her hand back. “He’s watching.”

Out of the corner of your eye, you spot Heizou and Scara making their way toward you. Scara’s gaze is unreadable, but his stare is piercing.

“Just wanted to make him jealous,” Mona smiles mischievously, her hand gently pinching your cheek.

You try to mask the surprise that rises in you as you look up at Scara. His expression remains neutral, but there’s something unsettling about the way he’s staring. Mona seems to notice too.

“Sorry for abandoning you guys,” Heizou apologizes, looking sheepish as you hand him your extra churro. “Got too caught up in competition.”

Scara says nothing. He doesn’t seem at all sorry for leaving you both. He takes the seat next to you, not Mona, who’s holding out a churro for him. His eyes flicker over to her before settling back on you.

“We should all ride something together before we leave,” you suggest, trying to shake off the tension. “How about a coaster?”

“Sure,” Heizou hums, though you can hear the hesitation in his voice.

Scara shrugs, nonchalant as always. “Whatever.”

The rest of the night drifts by in a blur of rides and laughter, though it’s hard to tell just how much fun Scara’s actually having. He never fully cracks a smile, his face as unreadable as ever, but there’s something about the way his posture relaxes just slightly on the rollercoaster that makes you think he’s enjoying it at least a little bit. Heizou, on the other hand, is the opposite and makes it known how much fun he’s having. He’s as animated as ever as he throws flirty comments your way between rides.

The weirdness from earlier fades between you and Heizou, especially as he ends up sitting next to you on every ride, his easy smile gradually putting you at ease.

But Scara? He’s hard to read. He follows along without complaint, occasionally joining in on the banter between you and Heizou, but when he’s not pulling one of his usual stony expressions he’s somewhere else. You catch him staring off into the distance as the carnival lights flicker in the fading sunset, his gaze fixed on something beyond you. It’s moments like these that make you wonder what’s really going on in that head of his. Something you never used to care about before.

Before you know it, the night sky has fully taken over, the bright carnival lights casting long shadows behind you. You pause for a moment, just long enough to breathe in the cool air, the faint smell of popcorn and sweets still lingering in the breeze.

Mona and Heizou end up walking ahead, chatting about something or the other. Meanwhile, Scara trails along beside you. He doesn’t speak, but he doesn’t walk ahead either. You almost feel like you should say something, if only to break the silence, but you’re not sure how to approach it.

“Thanks for the plushies, by the way,” you pipe up, the words feeling almost too casual, but you don’t know what else to say. Your hand instinctively grips one of the stuffed animals, the penguin that Scara had won for you. You’d given the rest to the crew, but you wanted to hold onto this one. The soft plush feels comforting against your palm.

Scara doesn’t immediately respond. You can feel his eyes on you for a brief second, before he looks back down at the ground, his expression unreadable. “No need,” he says in his usual flat tone, like it’s no big deal.

“Didn’t think I’d see you giving out prizes, Scara,” you say, the words slipping out before you can stop them. You try to make it sound lighthearted, but your voice catches a little on the last word. “You seemed pretty determined to win... for Mona.”

“It wasn’t for her,” he immediately says. But then, after a beat, he answers, his voice a little softer than usual, “I just didn’t want to hear Heizou gloat.”

“Besides,” he adds, eyeing the plush in your hand, “it looks better with you.” His steps slow, just slightly, and for a moment you think he’s about to say something else, but then he just keeps walking towards the dock.

You stand there for a second, a little caught off guard by his words. The air between you two feels charged. He said it so nonchalantly, like it didn’t matter, but there was something in the way he said it that made you wonder if it did.

With a small sigh, you hurry to catch up with him. As you walk alongside him, you can’t help but glance at the penguin plush in your hand, still unsure of what to make of this strange, quiet moment between you.

୨୧✧

Since you and Scara had chosen to go by boat you two had to wait a while longer for it to arrive. Mona and Heizou were already off to the island as you stood by the beach. You look over and see Scara sitting by himself.

He was sitting by the edge of the dock, legs dangling just above the water, his posture tense as he stared out at the horizon with a detached sort of focus.

You weren’t stupid, you knew he was trying to be alone. But with the way he’d been acting off all day and was now sitting out here by himself you felt your chest twist with something. Something that made you carry your feet over to him.

You hesitated for a moment, watching the way the wind tousled his hair and how he drew circles in the water with his feet.

"Scara," you called out, your voice quiet.

He didn’t respond.

You sighed, stepping closer. "Kuni," you tried again.

This time, he turned his head, his eyes flicking toward you, just enough to acknowledge your presence. He said nothing, but he scooted over on the small dock.

You hesitated for a second before taking a few steps and sitting next to him at the edge of the dock. The tension between you two was still thick and unresolved.

“So…” you began, trying to break the silence with casual ease. “It’s weird with our exes, huh?”

He let out a low, almost inaudible sigh, his eyes returning to the water. “Yeah.” His voice was flat. He was frustrated, whether it was with Mona, with Heizou, you, or himself, you couldn’t tell, but you figured it was a mix of all of it.

You watched him for a moment, then took a breath, deciding to ask something that had been nagging at you since breakfast. “How do you remember the blueberry thing?” you asked, eyes narrowed in curiosity.

Scara’s gaze flicked to you again, and this time, he raised an eyebrow, as if the answer was obvious. “Why wouldn’t I remember?”

His tone was casual, but there was a sharpness to it that made your chest tighten slightly. You’d never really considered that all the times you’d argued, all those little details, would stick with him over the years.

The silence stretched between you two, and you looked down, finally noticing the cigarette hanging loosely from his fingers.

“I thought you quit,” you said, offhandedly, trying to push the knot in your chest aside.

He didn’t even glance at you. “Don’t worry, I did,” he muttered, voice as indifferent as always. “I just carry one around.” He doesn’t question how you know about him quitting.

You were unsure if you should press further, so instead you just hummed in acknowledgment. You’re about to stand up and leave when Scara’s voice breaks through the quiet once more with a question of his own.

“So, you and Heizou?” he asks.

“Yeah, a long time ago,” you say, your tone more guarded than you intended. You didn’t think he’d ever cared about it. Then again, maybe he was just being nosy, as usual.

“Why didn’t you date him?” Scara asked, his eyes still trained on the water, watching the waves as they lapped lazily at his feet. He absentmindedly twirled the cigarette between his fingers, but you could feel his attention on you. You always could.

“I don’t know," you said after a long pause, your voice quieter. Your throat tightened. You hadn’t thought about Heizou in a long time. "He switched companies, and then... I debuted." You shrugged slightly, trying to make the words sound casual. “No time, or whatever.” You hated how unconvincing that sounded, but there it was.

Scara didn’t look at you, but you could feel his gaze. Then, after a moment, he said something that made your throat tighten even more.

“You have the time now, don’t you?”

You blinked at the question. For a few seconds, you didn’t answer. Three years had passed since then. Three years of nothing. You could have found the time. You could have sent a message or tried to find him after a concert, maybe even crossed paths at some industry event. You could have tried. But instead, you were caught up in everything that had come after…you’d been occupied with Scara.

You spared a glance towards him, but he wasn’t looking at you. He never looked at you when the questions got too close to something real. He was staring at the water, still twirling the cigarette between his fingers, but there was an unreadable expression in his face.

“I was occupied, to be honest,” you said, your voice unsteady.

He scoffed, “With what? Your other ten exes I don’t know about?”

“With you.”

There was a brief, charged silence. The weight of your words hung in the air, and you didn’t even understand what you meant. He didn’t respond immediately. Instead, he continued twirling the cigarette, his fingers moving mechanically. But you could feel his gaze shift towards you, sharper now. The unreadable expression on his face faltered just for a moment, but it was gone before you could place it.

Finally, he huffed out a breath, leaning back slightly, “Whatever. Not my problem,” he glances at you, “Can’t blame me for that.”

"Yeah, sure." You paused, your voice softer now, tinged with frustration and something else you couldn’t quite name, “But arguing does take up a lot of time.”

He didn’t answer right away. What was there to say? You could feel the unspoken weight of the past between you two, the years of frustration, of unspoken words.

All of the time that had slipped away, together but apart.

But instead, he just exhaled sharply, pulling himself to his feet with a lazy, practiced motion. He tucks his unlit cigarette away as he reaches his palm towards you. He hoists you up with ease, and you stumble a bit on the dock. His other arm grabs your waist to steady you before letting go, his touch lingering for a moment longer than he needed to.

“The boat’s here,” he murmurs, eyeing you.

You stare at his hand, your waist still warm from the brief contact, and then at the boat approaching in the distance. The night is settling in, the world around you dimming as the sky deepens to purple and dark blue. The quiet between you is thick, like the air before a storm, and for a moment, you can’t tell if you’re relieved or frustrated that he’s not saying anything else.

You swallow, a mix of something bitter and sweet twisting in your chest. “Yeah. Guess we should go.”

But as he walks, his pace a little faster than before, you catch the faintest of glances over his shoulder. His gaze meets yours for a fleeting second, almost like he wants to say something but stops himself.

And just like that, he’s gone, stepping onto the boat with the same indifference he always carries.

[00:00:00] GUEST INTERVIEW TAKE ONE

YAE: What's your name, my beautiful queen?

JEAN: Oh God, cut!

[00:00:03] GUEST INTERVIEW TAKE TWO

YAE: [SIGHS] What's your name?

MONA: [LAUGHS] It's Mona! You all know me.

JEAN: How has your first week on the island been?

MONA: Honestly, weird. Scaramouche has been giving me the nastiest side eye but I still want him to at least acknowledge me, and Y/N is so socially awkward it kind of hurts and—

YAE: Haha, so funny! [PAINED LAUGH] What about a good thing?

YAE: [WHISPERS] This isn't a good look for you, Mona.

MONA, STILL TALKING: - and you know, Fischl is beautiful, but how am I supposed to talk to her? I know I'm a bad bitch, but I can't fumble this one. It'll be so bad for my image and-oh, sorry, did you ask me something?

JEAN: What's... what's a good thing about your first week here. [SOUNDS PAINED]

MONA: Oh! Getting to tan. I'm so pale being inside all day as an idol, it's nice to get some sun. [SMILES]

YAE: Cut!

[00:00:00] POST DOUBLE DATE INTERVIEW

YAE: So, how are you feeling about our guests?

YN: You are an evil woman for bringing them here.

YAE: [GIGGLES] Right? I’m so good at this.

YN: Seeing Heizou was a little awkward, but I think we’re okay now?

YAE: Any sparks flying?

YN: I’m not sure, I don’t think so.

YAE: And what are your thoughts on Mona?

YN: Well, she was nice…?

YAE: [RAISES A BROW AND GESTURES FOR YOU TO CONTINUE]

YN: Well, she was nice on the date. But looking back I think she was just trying to get a reaction out of Scara [SIGHS] I still had fun though.

YAE: I see all those plushies your not date won for you [WIGGLES HER EYEBROWS SUGGESTIVELY] That was romantic, right?

YN: [WAVES HER OFF] He was just competing with Heizou!

YAE: [GROANS LOUDLY]

JEAN: Don’t mind her–

LISA: [ALSO GROANING BEHIND THE CAMERA]

YN: Archons, sorry.

YAE: Yeah, you should be. Open your eyes.

YN: They’re open I swear! [PUTS HANDS UP]

YAE: Hmph. CUT!

stuck with you!

masterlist — prev | next

btw chapter eleven is when yn mentions they don’t like blueberries, told ya it would come back (and sorry again if u actually like them, replace it with a fruit u hate)

also typo slide 27 it’s supposed to say yn weverse update and i think i put the wrong year for a few chapters oops

me tryna figure out how to do backstory: twitter thread! more scaramona backstory next chapter so be patient xx

i cudnt fit the written text below pic in this as much so make sure u read all the written parts!

also scara only saying his body count after yn shows interest i know what u r

pls comment or send me an ask if u enjoyed i need motivation 🤗

comment on the MASTERLIST if i can use ur user as a fan in the au!

notes — wow 3 updates in one month merry christmas also btl easter egg who caught that

synopsis — after the disaster that was the live award show, where you and scaramouche got into an argument on stage after both of your groups got a tie for top artists, your guys' PR teams have been in shambles trying to scrape up your mess. that's when the idea to send you both off with some other idols to a remote location for a survival dating show to mend your public image comes up. before you know it your bags are packed and you’re on a plane to a remote island. the only obligation is you need to end up with scaramouche at the end of the show, whether you end up liking him or not doesn’t matter to your managers as long as the show’s ratings stay high. whatever you do in between to get there is up to you!

taglist — @na1lea @cindywasneverhere @lunavixia @aestherin @mlaakai @camvrin @retiredmommylover @iheartpieck @cartierfiles @loveariel @silly-ez @mochipls @pomeiu @flowerypesky @creammpuff @boxdisappeared @kissingkzuha @webbywill @kazusboyfriend @s3xpistolss @bunns-wonderland @lordbugs @localgirlywithnolife @kosumos @danfelions @featuredtofu @pinxeajin @haeunoo @scaradooche @pglt19 @chemiru @childesbabygirl @simonisferal @shutingstar @ttalgi @esuz @tokkishouse @kitsuvil @scarasmood @ihearttori @nomurahayami @starringyau @androxphobic @reivelmin @animeobsessed56 @femaholicc @vi0let-writes @izayumi-chan @aloflapse @migorengeaterrr

#scaramouche x reader smau #scaramouche smau #scaramouche x yn #scaramouche x gender neutral reader #scaramouche x male reader #scaramouche x y/n #scaramouche x you #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche tests #genshin smau #scaramouche genshin x reader #stuck with you smau

935 notes · View notes

multicohn · 6 months ago

Text

summary: nicole piastri ships y/n with yuki and is determined to get them together.

warnings: none

pairing: fem! reader x yuki tsunoda

genre: fluff

face claim: none

author note: tbh this sucks, but yuki retired and im upset.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

y/n can clearly remember when her crush on yuki tsunoda started:

oscar had only talked about the japanese male a few times, his mother absolutely loved him. when the australian grand prix came around, oscar had ( unwillingly ) invited his own teammate along with yuki tsunoda, daniel couldn't join them since he was going to spend time with his family, but sent a gift basket to thank her for the invite.

y/n was very nervous about interacting with the two drivers since she never strayed too far from the garage or hospitality when attending the races.

she was busy chatting with hattie at the table when they arrived. oscar greeted his friends and guided them through the house, y/n making sure to keep her head down and pretend to type away as they came in.

“thought you only had three sisters?” lando asked once they were out of ear shot

oscar shrugged, “we grew up together, it’s basically the same thing”

“no, it isn’t” lando argued

“yes, it is”

“no. it isn’t”

“yes. it is”

“isn’t”

“is”

while the two mclaren drivers argued, yuki greeted oscar’s mum to brought him into a hug before ushering him out of the kitchen and refusing his help. yuki sat down at the table and smiled at y/n who had looked up to see who sat across from him.

“i’m yuki” he reached his hand out and y/n wiped her slightly sweaty hands onto her skirt / shorts / pants

“y/n”

“so, how do you know, oscar?”

“we went to primary together”

y/n thought that yuki was quite sweet for talking to her, but figured it would change the moment oscar or lando came — but, it didn’t. yuki was curious and wanted their conversation to go on forever, he liked talking with her and found himself glancing in her direction every few seconds.

nicole noticed this and couldn’t help, but let out a giggle.

since then, her mission had been clear: get y/n and yuki to date.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

it was no secret to fans that nicole piastri absolutely adored yuki and made jokes about her basically adopting him into the family since oscar is considered a leclerc now. every time y/n would accompany the piastri family to a race, nicole would drag her off to see yuki before making up some excuse to leave them alone ( despite all the staff members that were also around ). y/n knew what nicole was doing, but kept quiet.

“y/n!” she looked up from her phone to see who had called out her name and smiled at seeing yuki jogging towards her

“hi, yuki” he reciprocated her smile before stopping just a few centimetres in front

“oscar’s mum just came by, but you didn’t, so i came to find you” she felt herself grow warm at his words

“oh, sorry, must’ve been too caught up with oscar”

an uncomfortable silence fell between them as everyone else moved around the pair, completely unaware of their thoughts.

“should i walk away now?”

“should i tell her what oscar’s mum told me?”

yuki cleared his throat and it made y/n pull her eyes away from the slightly cloudy sky.

“so — oscar’s mum told me that you have a crush on me…”

y/n’s eyes widened as yuki nervously played with his hands before continuing on.

“she did what? should i run? i should probably run. how did she even know? was i that obvious or was yuki oblivious? fuck —“ her internally monologue was cut off by yuki speaking

“sorry, um, if you’re not busy after the race. do you want to eat with me?”

“oh! um, sure” yuki smiled and y/n tried to reciprocate it, but her beating heart didn’t stop

“okay. um, so, i probably have to go back now” he glanced down at his watch and y/n nodded silently already taking a few steps back

“i’ll see you later”

“bye” y/n said quietly while waving at him

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

extra scene

oscar looked at his mother with a weird expression as she explained her plan to get y/n with yuki.

“what if rejects her and she comes crying to the garage?” she waved him off

“he likes her back” oscar didn’t believe her

“mum, i don’t know”

“don’t be a wet blanket, oscar” one of his sisters spoke as she walked past him and he just sighed

nicole gave her son a smug smile as she watched yuki and y/n from inside mclaren’s hospitality. he shook his head, not believing his mother’s faith in yuki liking y/n — he didn’t even know she liked him, but was brushed off by his mother who wasn’t surprised.

“hey, y/n” oscar called out as she made her way towards them

“hey, osc” he rolled his eyes at the nickname

“what were you and tsunoda talking about?”

“he asked me on a date?” his mother smiled widely at her words

“that’s sounds more like a question…” he trailed off making nicole glare at him, upset that he’s ruining the fantasy of her ship

“well, he asked me to eat with him after the race. it might be cause nicole told him that i liked him-“ she gave the older woman a look, but she pretended not to notice “-but, yeah” oscar just sighed, again

305 notes · View notes

withlove-angel · 1 year ago

Text

⚠️warnings: im terrible at writing fights... sorry in advance .Probably grammar mistakes.

Lost puppy

(Zoro x reader x mihawk)

Luffy finished up the meeting with the crew and began to prepare himself for bed. It was pretty late at night by now and he was feeling a bit sleepy. However, as he was about to enter his room, he noticed that y/n was nowhere to be found and he couldn't help but feel a bit concerned. He decided to ask someone else where she might be.

He founded Zoro walking on the deck

"Hmm, Zoro? Have you seen y/n around? She is with you?"

Zoro looks over at him and shakes his head "She isn't here? I haven't seen her since dinner..." he sound worried

"Could you help me find her? I fear that she might be doing something fun without us"

Zoro nods "she probably causing someone headache" they leave the ship to go look for their little trouble maker, making their way outside.

"I heard screams earlier... did you guys fought?" Luffy ask curious, really because y/n is amost glued at zoro...

"She said i wasn't holding my sword properly" he say as it was some ultimate crime "she doesn't even fights with swords"

"We haven't seen her since dinner and she hasn't come back to the room yet. I wonder what she could be up to? Maybe she found a really good bar... man im so hungry"

"When you not hungry?"

"When im eating"

"Yeah... sure... but, the fact that she isn't back yet is what concerns me. I really hope she isn't about to do something reckless. She is a little unpredictable when she is upset."

They start to walk in the beach, soon spotted y/n but she isn't alone seems like she is screaming at someone...then they look closer its mihawk, the greatest swordsman.

Zoro stops and stares in shock as he sees Mihawk standing in front of her. He can only imagine the scene taking place with y/n arguing with Mihawk. He just knows that this will only end in disaster as it's essentially a fight between two people who hold a lot of pride and ego. He turns to Luffy and speaks up as he points out Mihawk to her

...Did Mihawk just show up out of nowhere? Did I miss something? He seems genuinely confused as to what they could've possibly even found to argue about."looks like he is on the same island than we...." luffy say as much as surprise then he is.

Zoro nods slowly as he processes this new development. He takes a moment to think before speaking up.

"...We have to be extremely careful. We don't want to antagonize Mihawk any further. The last thing we need is to start a new conflict. Especially when i don't have the strength to take on another fight, yet...."

" So what is the argument about? Did y/n do something to Mihawk to make him upset?"

Luffy has extremely curious as zoro pinched his nose bridge and sigh

"This stupid woman..."

After a moment of weid silence luffy speaks up "I think it's too late to prevent another fight"

Zoro shifts his attention to y/n and Mihawk he can see she is blocking his attack using just her dagger... she blocked as warlord claymore attack with just a dagger... He is utterly shocked by her speed and reflexes when she blocks Mihawk's attack with just a dagger. It seems as though she's gone far beyond what he expected from the little y/n. Then, he is reminded of reality when he sees Mihawk's face begin to show annoyance. Mihawk is shocked for a split second by her ability, but then he quickly recovers from his shock; his expression turning to a scowl as he speaks up in a soft, yet intimidating tone

"...You can wield Haki now, young lady? When did you develop this power?"

The girl infront of him just smiles "you dont know me pretty boy... if you think I will come with you just so you can get me to the marines you better fuck off"

Zoro watches as y/n's mocking words set Mihawk off once again. Mihawk's scowl darkens and he looks even more irritated now. He speaks up again with his trademark calm tone, trying to be clear and precise

"I see. So you also wield Haki. But even with that, you could never defeat me in a fight. You're too young and too weak. Your Haki is nothing more than a parlor trick that could never take me down. You're just being arrogant and it's about time that someone taught you a lesson."

it's a dare? she must be crazy... her devil smile... the one she used when she kill someone... fuck...

Zoro is shocked by her response as he raises an eyebrow at Mihawk's reaction as well. He's clearly taken aback by her words, but she stands her ground. She is willing to fight Mihawk if necessary. Mihawk raises an eyebrow as he seems intrigued by her audacity. His scowl quickly turns into a smile. He unsheathes his blade "...Very well then. If you insist on having a taste of death, I suppose there's no need to stop you from experiencing the truth about the world first-hand." He lifts his sword a d try an hit, experimental hit, that she effortless block with her dagger...

" I didn't even needed my sword to block? Isn't a shame?" Her mocking tone strt to get under his skin. He seems surprised that she was able to block. He seems even more surprised that it was effortless on her part. Mihawk is clearly impressed by y/nl's abilities, and he speaks up after his attack. He seems almost excited at the prospect of a real fight.

"...Interesting. Your Haki is much stronger than I had anticipated. You may have a chance against me after all. This will be a very fun battle indeed. Prepare yourself."

He raises that same smile once more before he begins to strike again, She blocked all of his attacks "having fun?"

Zoro watches as Mihawk continues to challenge y/n, but she is able to stop Mihawk's attacks effortlessly with nothing more than her dagger.

He notices Mihawk's smile once again. Y/n's Haki seems powerful and is causing himto be excited by the prospects of a fight between them. Mihawk raises an eyebrow and then smiles again at her response. He seems intrigued by her Haki and ability to fight.

"Your Haki truly has the makings of a strong warrior. I must see more of it!" For thos one his curiosity picked, he gives her a littlestronger attacks, the one he use to easily defeathis enemies but... she back away slightly but still can block it... her hair dancing with the wind from the blades shocking. He charges forward with his strongest attack yet, but once again, y/n is able to block him using her dagger. Mihawk takes a step back and smiles again.

" ...You can defend, but can you attack just as strong?" He charges forward again, this time with a flurry of attacks coming from his claymore. Will y/n be able to block this one?

She got to use her body more. Sure, she dont have a y doubts ahe can win thsi but underestimate mihawk is probably one of the few mistakes she wouldn't comit. using his own strength against him, y/n can firce an attack, making him back away

Zoro has his mouth open as he watches Angel counter Mihawk's attacks and make him back away. It seems like she is using Mihawk's own strength against him to fight back. She is doing far better than what he had imagined. He seems impressed and even shocked; however, Mihawk seems to be enjoying himself.

"You are able to fight back and even use my power against me! I am not used to this kind of excitement in a battle! Do you truly wish to go all out and fight me?!"

He looks almost like a scholl boy. His cold face hanging a smile that almost never appears... she swer she could see little hearts on his eyes...

"I was only playing around... but If you want to lose this badly" she teases. Mihawk's eyes narrow and his expression shifts into a smirk as he nods in response to her taunt. His hert beating faster than ever.

" I see. I will not hold back and neither should you. As you wish. You have my attention now, young lady. Show me what you can do."

"Dagger or sword?" She let him pick, holding the two of them in each hand

He thinks for a moment before he speaks up in his usual, calm tone of voice

"Hmmm.... You seem quite skilled with your dagger and I don't want to underestimate that. Let's use our chosen weapons then. I will fight you with my claymore and you can fight me with your dagger. Do you agree to these terms?"

"Pretty well, pretty boy" she smiling playing with her dagger a bit, he scoffs rolling his eyes slightly. He has his claymore held in front of him with one hand as he shifts his stance. Mihawk looks at y/n and waits for an attack, ready at all times to block it. His expression is one of a warrior who is taking this challenge very seriously. From what Zoro can tell, Mihawk is no longer toying with y/n like he was earlier, but rather treating her as a worthy opponent. Zoro could feel a little jealous. Maube for the way the greatest swordsman treat her like an equal... or something else...

Mihawk doesn't seem to be willing to let her win easy, either. It's game time

Zoro watches as y/n gives Mihawk experimental attacks. He notes that the young woman is playing around and yet still able to match Mihawk in terms of strength. He also sees the ther men smile as he defends from the attacks. This seems to be exciting him, who is clearly enjoying the challenge against this opponent. Mihawk continues to defend against her experimental attacks and smiles as she proves to be an equal match for him.

Suddenly, she speed up an attack, mihawk almost couldn't block. She stab his claymore making the dagger enter the blade of it, making a little hole, both of them stares at each other. Y/n have a sly grin, almost laughing as she tilt her head, finding funny the unbelievable face pf mihawk...Even though it was a small wound, Mihawk is now aware of the real danger that lies ahead of him. Law now looks at Angel with a bit more respect than before. She is really going all out now.

He takes a defensive position as he moves his claymore in a sweeping motion and unleashes a flurry of attacks. She block all of it, smiling. she is dancing the main act, her move calculatedand sharp... she is mocking the strongest warrior in all blue... zoro is both shocked and amazed by y/n's abilities. Mihawk may be the strongest swordsman, but she has proven to be much stronger than Mihawk anticipated. She blocks all of Mihawk's attacks and continues to mock him. Mihawk seems slightly irritated by how casually she's taking him, but it soon turns to a grin. He charges forward and attacks with his claymore once more, launching a powerful attack. She conter attack once more, as he finished mihawk was taken back, with a little cut on his cheek "hurted you pretty boy?" She teases with a little pout. Mihawk seems to have been caught off-guard once more, allowing her to injure him. Mihawk looks at her with a hint of annoyance now, as well as a bit of pride. This young person has proven herself to be extremely quick, as well as agile. He smiles as he responds to her taunt

"A scratch is hardly a wound in the world of swordsmanship. A warrior can sustain countless scratches and cuts on the battlefield. You're gonna need to do better than that if you hope to defeat me."

"I don't wanna ruin a pretty face like yours, would be a shame" she play with her dagger, the little smirk driving both men crazy

Mihawk seems to be enjoying himself as well. He then stands up straight and prepares to charge forward once again. He looks at Angel now with a determined gaze.

"Enough with the teasing and the games. Let's see if you are truly worthy of being in my way."

Shorting the fight: she blocked all... effortless... she is definitely something. He stares at Angel in pure shock as he sees that his strikes are all blocked effortlessly. He remains silent for a moment to take in this amazing sight. Eventually, he speaks up once again

"You are incredible. You have managed to block all of my attacks so far with ease. You even injured me with your dagger, something that shouldn't have been possible. Perhaps you are worthy of a fight from me, after all." Mihawk's face turns into a grin as he raises his claymore high."Try me pretty boy" she winks at him as she dodge his attack. It seems the young woman has an ego that matches her strength. Mihawk seems to appreciate this aspect of her. He chuckles and charges forward once more, this time going for attack that covers more area. Mihawk seems to be determined to land a hit that y/nl can't dodge.*She have to do various back flips to escape being hurt, and she can do it. It's the most someone ever lested in a fight against mihawk.

Zoro is impressed as he watches y/n do a series of back flips without injury. Mihawk is also amazed and amused by her ability to avoid his attacks, even if they do cover a broader area. Mihawk seems excited as he charges forward once again. He's getting ready to unleash an attack and is determined to land it this time.

She dodged, as his claymore hit the ground she uses the lack on his shield to do an attack, she could separate him from his claymore that its laying on the ground

Zoro's eyes widen as he watches y/n take advantage of Mihawk's momentary distraction to separate him from his claymore! Mihawk was so focused on his attacks that he didn't even realize that he had dropped his claymore on the ground. Now, Mihawk is temporarily defenseless...

He stares at y/n and her taunting grin. He then closes his eyes in frustration before opening them again. He speaks with a bit of irritation now.

" ...You are quite the adversary. You have impressed me in this fight"

she winks as she back away from his claymore in the ground so he can pick it. His eyes shift to his claymore now on the ground. He notices that she is no longer taunting him and that she's even backed away to give him time to retrieve his claymore. Mihawk's eyes narrow slightly as his irritation turns back into focus. Now is the time for Mihawk to truly show off his power. He quickly goes to retrieve his claymore.

She have a calm demeanor on, the mocking smile always on her face. He is now completely focused.She does not seem intimidated by Mihawk's serious demeanor

She have to step back a little bit mihawk couldn't hit her. Zoro sees that she has managed to block and dodge all of Mihawk's attacks. Mihawk seems impressed and even a bit excited by that...

You can't rely on your speed and agility forever. Eventually, you are going to have to stand your ground and fight back. You better learn to do this quickly or else I'll overwhelm you with my attacks.

Mihawk's eyes are filled with determination now."I didn't want to hurt you pretty boy, but if you insist" she smirks

Zoro smiles at y/n's taunt. Mihawk just seems even more impressed and excited by her abilities. She is truly turning into an impressive opponent for him. Mihawk charges toward her once again with his claymore still drawn and poised to strike. It looks like Mihawk will take her comments to heart, now that he has a reason to attack with full force.

He attack with full force, she block directly, and attacks after. Her speed and strength is something from another world... mihawk almost couldn't block due the force of it... zoro is amazed and shocked by her now. She is blocking Mihawk's attack with ease and countering with her own. Mihawk seems to be struggling to defend, despite being the strongest swordsman in the world. Y/n's speed and strength seem to belong to two people and not just a single individual. She is able to overwhelm even the strongest.

Zoro watches as Mihawk's arms become tired for the first time. Mihawk seems to be struggling to keep up. Y/n's strength, speed, and skill all seem to be beyond Mihawk's level. Will his experience help him win this battle?

Mihawk's expression seems even more grim and determined. He is still struggling to defend against her, however. Y/n seems in control as she counters all of his attacks and continues to press the advantage.

Mihawk tries to hit her, she backflips and use his claymore are a support, pushing him back a lot. She is using her agility, speed, and strength to her full advantage. Mihawk seems overwhelmed by her abilities and her confidence. He is slowly being pushed back and can't seem to gain any advantage over y/n

" ...You are impressive. No one has been able to overwhelm me like this with sheer strength. Your abilities are quite extraordinary. I will have to try something else. I cannot allow you to defeat me like this."

"But you're not ganna win, pretty boy"she say as she make another powerful hit, his claymore almost broke

He raises his claymore and holds his footing as he begins to focus his attention on y/n's dagger hand. She grins, excited by her strength, as her ability is acknowledged by Mihawk. He seems determined to take advantage of the situation.

He charge towards her...She blocked all ...and when she counter attack what she was promising happens. Mihawk claymore fly fair away from him, he was pushed on his knees as y/n dagger is pressing against his neck poking a bit "what happened pretty baby?" she smirk

Mihawk is left defenseless and on his knees, as she has her dagger hovering directly over his neck. He seems to be in awe and amused by y/n's skill; he's now also clearly in love with the young woman in front of him. Zoro notices that Mihawk's face has turned bright red as he attempts to reply to her. " ....Uhm...you're...you're..."

His attempt to compliment her is interrupted by him stuggling to get any words out at all

She smiles "your are really pretty on your knees for me pretty boy"

Mihawk's face turning an even deeper shade of red as he listens to y/n mock him. He, who is seemingly in love with her, tries to reply in kind and flirt with her himself.

"....Y-you're...d-decent looking yourself, a-angel."

Mihawk's attempt at flirting was extremely awkward. Zoro watches as Mihawk's face turns a brilliant crimson as soon as his words are uttered. He is clearly very attracted to y/n and has fallen head over heels for her.

She laughs taking the dagger out his neck "I told you a would win" she wink at him.

His face is flush red, as he is clearly enamored with the young woman standing before him. Mihawk seems to be completely in love with her, as he is incapable of replying to her. Angel winks at Mihawk, increasing someone elses feelings...

Zoro looks away and seems to become more annoyed than ever

"she won" Luffy said amazed his mouthalmost hitting the ground "she won against the most powerful men in all blue..."l

Zoro can feel his heart racing as his jealousy grows even more. The image of y/n standing before Mihawk and mocking him has only managed to deepen his unknow crush on her. He decides to speak up once again, his tone indicating a hint of annoyance now.

" She is too good. I hope Mihawk is happy. He'll probably spend the rest of the day thinking about how attractive this woman is." He seems to be unable to hide his jealousy over Mihawk's romantic interest in y/n.

Luffy eyes shine at his annoyed tone "jealous?"

Zoro feels his eyebrows furrowl. He knows that Mihawk's admiration for her is turning into romantic interest. He is clearly a bit annoyed by seeing him look at her with such a loving gaze, as he too has developed feelings towards her. Zoro looks over at Luffy, the hint of irritation now turning into a full-blown scowl and his voice becoming more irritated, as he responds

"What are you talking about, Luffy, i don't get jealous "

He look at the both foghter again. Deep down aishing he was mihawk, but for the firt time not because of his title of the greatest swordsman...

And for y/n the little question pop out... she have stronger feelings for one of them? Waht happens if she don't give her attention to them?

--------------------------------------------------

If you like, please ♡

Probably gonna write part 2 soon

@who-the-hockeysticks @itsladyliv @dummyduck44 @violet-19999

#one piece fanfic #yandere one piece #one piece imagine #luffy x reader #Mihawk smit #one piece imagines #zoro #zoro x reader #mihawk #opla mihawk #mihawk x reader #opla zoro #opla #one piece live action #zoro smut #mihawk smut #yandere zoro #yandere mihawk

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norman-fucking-reedus · 1 year ago

Note

omg since your requests are open,,, idk but imagining a female reader fucking herself infront of Daryl while he is chained to chair drives me insane to think about.. like reader's feet are on his knees and daryl feels her every movement but dang he can't do anything and the reader is a bit dominant.. i'd love if you wrote smth like this. im obsessed with ur writing!!

Anon lets make out rn cause ive had this idea for a while ESPECIALLY based off this picture??? Like hello??

I changed it up a little since i got the hottest idea in the middle of writing so I hope it makes you kick your feet in the way the way I did while writing this 😽 (I SAW UR OTHER REQUEST TOO BABE YK I GOTCHU 🫶🏾)

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

“Dammit girl! Untie me” Daryl thrashed in the wobbly chair, growling from where it sat at the edge of the bed in front of you. You simply watched him struggle in the tight ropes, becoming redder by the second. “I like you tied up. Even more when you’re my personal chair” You ran a hand across his lap and winked.

Daryl grunted when you straddled him, hands pulling at their restraints. You could feel his bulge growing as you slowly ground your hips down, a strained groan coming from him. You cupped his chin and placed a few soft kisses on his lips, moving to his neck and back up to his lips, only pulling away from him. “Tha hell ya doin’ ta me?” Daryl watched as you opened the dresser drawer and tossed two objects on the bed, sitting down next to them.

You couldn’t hold back the wicked smile that fought onto your face as you stood up and removed each article of clothing, tauntingly slowly.

Daryl’s watched you, closely, breathing picking up as you slid your pants down, and moved to undo your bra. He watched as you teased the hem of your undies, sitting down in front of him again.

His cheeks heated up when you kicked a leg up, ankle resting on his shoulder as you spread yourself, running a finger down your slit through your panties. Daryl watched, hands fidgeting with rope as he became uncomfortably hard in his jeans. He wanted to touch you, feel all over your body and maybe inside.

You continued massaging yourself until the fabric was soaked, and Daryl’s breathing was the loudest thing in the room. His face was red and a thin layer of sweat was present on his whole body. Suddenly all his clothes didn’t fit right.

He could do nothing but watch as you pushed your underwear to the side, erotically spreading your pussy lips before reaching to grab one of the objects. It was a long, white vibrator you had “found” at the start, but really you just stole it from the sex shop when everything went to shit. It roared to life in your hands, and you leaned forward to press it onto Daryl’s bulge, soaking in the way he threw his head back and his body jerked.

You kept it there only for a minute, leaning back and bringing it down to your cunt, massaging between your folds and moaning when it reached your clit, holding it in place as you brought your fingers to your entrance, easily slipping in.

The scene was something out of a porno, and Daryl swore his mouth was beginning to water as he just watched you. The way he could feel the strong vibrations travel through your leg, the way he could see your fingers curling and scissoring open, he was starting to get desperately needy.

As you neared your orgasm, you pulled completely away from yourself, chest heaving as you came down, eyes meeting Daryl’s. His pupils had been blown so wide, you weren’t even sure there was color anymore. “Enjoying my show?” You whispered, pulling your leg off his shoulder as you moved to stand over him, bending over the bed so that he had a clear view of your backside. “J’st let me touch ya, doll. Why ya gotta torture me?” He rasped, eyes roaming as he took in the sight of your ass right in front of his face, so close yet so far.

Daryl was impossibly hard in his pants, the scratchy fabric sending lightning through his body whenever he accidentally bumped his tip against it. He was so needy it was starting to hurt, even more when the clear dildo you were bringing to your folds came into view.

You rubbed the silicone up and down against yourself, grinding when you brought it to your clit. You could feel Daryl’s eyes on you as his hands tugged and pulled at the binding ropes, but he had taught you how to tie some real good knots. He could do nothing but pitifully whine as he watched the dildo slowly slide into you, the clearness giving him a whole different show.

He could see the way your pussy stretched around the toy, working it in and out slowly, soft moans coming from you as you did. His cock throbbed as his eyes never left your cunt, wishing that instead of that dildo you would use him like a dildo, riding his sensitive cock for as long as you wanted, fuck he just badly wants to be inside of you.

As if reading his mind, you flipped yourself around so that you could face him, pulling the dildo out as you looked at him, eyes drinking up the messy state he was in. His face was so red, sweat rolling down his forehead as you could tell he was just so hard in his pants. Daryl’s fidgety hands had started to rub his wrists raw against the rope, the pain only adding to his boner. He looked a pure fucking mess. You swelled with pride at that.

Your hands began undoing his pants, pulling them only half down to his knees. For a split second, Daryl thought you were finally going to touch him, even if all you did was grab him through his underwear he just needed to be touched. Instead, he watched as you added some spit to the bottom of your didlo, and suctioned it right onto his muscled thigh, giggling to yourself like a psycho as you straddled it, purposely grinding your dripping cunt on his leg as his wide eyes stared into yours.

You cupped his sweaty face in your hands, wiping it as you just held his face and stared beyond his eyes and down into his soul. He could feel you sink down onto the toy, and watched as your gaze darkened and your eyelids lowered. “You’ve been such a good boy for me Dar. Watching and staying mostly silently. Can you be even better for me and cum without me having to touch your cock?” He desperately shook his head no, traitorous tears pricked his eyes as your pace increased. “Can’t- Need ya- Need ya ta touch m’cock, please mommy I need it so bad” He babbled and you cooed, giving him a warm kiss that he completely melted into.

He always begged so sweetly, and it went straight to your full cunt, however, you had to force yourself not to give in, not when you had already got this far, Your hands moved to grip his shoulders, lifting yourself up and down at a rough velocity, the sound of your ass slapping down on his thigh filled the room and Daryl’s head, his eyes flickered between your face and the way you rode his thigh.

You reached behind you and patted around until you found the vibrator, bringing it to life and pressing it against your clit, the one hand you had still on your boyfriend’s shoulder curled into the flesh, lewd moans pulling from your chest. Daryl felt himself getting dizzy watching you, hair sticking to his forehead and cold pain shooting from his raw wrists. It was so hot, too hot. His vision was beginning to blur, heart pounding so hard he felt like it would come out his chest. His body trembled and he threw his head back when you very lightly pressed the vibrator to his clothed cock, adding fuel to his orgasm as it pumped through his entire fucking soul, tears finally rolling down his cheeks as his cock pulsed itself empty, soaking erotically through the fabric. The toy turned off, and you slowed your hips, watching the way Daryl’s body went limp.

“Very good boy. That’s exactly what I wanted to see, handsome” Your voice was like candy as you whispered in his ear, sighing as you lifted yourself off the dildo with a wet pop, moving to cut Daryl’s hands free as you fully straddled his lap, feeling his release on your puffy pussy. His shaky hands immediately went to your hips, waist, thighs, holy hell your skin felt so good. His poor wrists were red and raw, a small amount of blood forming. “We’re gonna wrap your wrists up. Think your little friend will wanna join us?” You whispered against his lips, pressed down on his soft cock, feeling the cooling cum ooze out from underneath, sticking to your cunt. “If yer talkin’ about m’cock hell yea. Get tha’ fuckin’ dildo off me” He grunted and you realized his legs were also still bound together. You giggled, popping the suction cup off his thigh and stretching to cut the ropes off his ankles.

You moved off his lap so he could finally stand and stretch, kicking his pants completely off and his soiled underwear, which revealed how his cock was dripping in his own release. You were almost on him immediately, falling down onto your knees in front of him. “Your wrists are gonna have to wait a minute”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

I need to fuck his fucking soul into my body NOW 😾

｡･:*:･ﾟ★｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★

#daryl dixon #daryl fanfiction #the walking dead #daryl x female reader #daryl x reader #the walking dead daryl #twd #daryl dixion imagine #daryl dixion smut #daryl x you #daryl dixion x reader #norman fucking reedus

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age-of-play-i-say · 1 year ago

Note

are you ever going to continue the middle and little series? not to pressure, just asking because i really enjoyed that first installment <3

Funny you should ask, I've been hanging onto 80% of this one for awhile, thinking it needed more editing but like here you go!

“Okay, is everyone ready for movie night? Still feeling good about the scene?” Daddy’s doing some last minute checks before headspace made that kind of thinking feel far away.

Baby nodded from her playpen and Little piped up from the couch, “yes, Daddy! Essited for watchin’ a big kid movie!” Daddy chuckled.

“Okay, well remember to double tap your watches to call me if things get too intense or you need my help, ahem, finishing up.” Daddy winked at Baby, who blushed, falling into headspace out of sheer embarrassment.

“Be good to our Baby, okay Little one? She’s still adjusting and she needs your sweetness and helping hands. Enjoy your movie nap together, I’ll be back in an hour.” Daddy flipped on the prepared DvD and strode upstairs, confident that his Little could handle this.

Onscreen appeared some of Baby and Little’s favorite characters, but they weren’t solving mysteries like usual. They were just talking so far, and pressing their faces together noisily.

Baby watched, wide-eyed, suckling her binkie and looking littler and littler in her crinkly diapey, surrounded by her plushies. One of the characters on screen took off his undies, still noisily kissing a girl onscreen. Baby’s sweet little face wrinkled, confusion passing over her pretty features. Little saw her eyes flit down to the man’s big grown-up stiffy and she went even pinker.

Little wanted to focus on the fun, grown-up playtime video on the screen, but that involved tearing his focus away from Baby, whose nipples hardened instantly when the kissing started. He wondered if Baby remembered their first kisses, around her comfort binkie, the same one she’s suckling now. He wondered how it might feel to kiss her like the girl on the screen.

Should I get nakey? Little wonders, shifting his hips closer and closer to the edge of the couch.

He looked Baby up and down, and saw her bottom lift and fall against the puppy pads lining her pen, bouncing subtly. Her eyes were glued to the screen, and Little was embarrassed to see the lollipop game he sometimes played with Daddy up there, the girl in the scene on her knees kissing and licking all over the guy’s big stiffy.

Little closed his eyes, feeling light-headed and falling deeper into headspace.

Soooo tingly, wan touchies. Big kid touchies.

Behind her paci, he heard Baby whine, just pouting. She’s so little, she barely knows about tingles, but it’s clear to Little that she’s getting all worked up and tingly. His heart aches for her, so confused, so little.

“Baby! You like da movie?” he palmed himself over his undies, making sure to grind up into it with a sweet, little moan when she tore her eyes away to look up at her Big Bubba Little.

Baby nodded, sucking her paci a little extra before spitting it out to hang on its lanyard, pressing her hand in the same spot Little did but over her big puffy diaper, “ye, like ‘im lots n lots,” Baby chirps, “but feelin all sticky in m’ diapey!” She tries to hump her hand, but just kind of air humped back and forth confusedly. She whines again, louder this time.

Bubba Little felt a curl of earnest affection burst in his heart. She needed his help.

“Bubba can help, lil Baby.” She looks up, teary-eyed, to see Little sliding off the couch. He came to the edge of Baby’s playpen and pointed at a big teddy bear in the corner.

“Grab your bear, get on your hands and knees, and tuck him ‘tween your legs under your diapey.” Little pressed his hand against the front of his pants again, watching her comply with his request.

“Put your binky back in, too, you don hafta talk at all, Bubba’ll tell you what to do.”

Baby whole face relaxed when she popped her paci back in her mouth, happy to be taken care of again. She settled in on top of her bear and looked up at the screen where the lollipop game was heating up.

She looked to her big brother for help, “what is-?” she managed before lapsing into another big-eyed silence. She bucked her hips like before, yelping when her sticky padding actually provided friction.

Her eyes returned to the screen, in awe of the feeling she could provoke with just her hips motion. She ground down again, her little face and shoulders relieved at the freedom from her own thoughts combined with being able to seek her own pleasure.

Little can't take his eyes off her. The man onscreen keeps making dirty noises, but Baby's humping and whimpering takes precedence.

“'s the tingles game, Baby, I play wit Daddy if ‘m good,” Little can't keep his hands off his winkie now, this naughty interaction searing his brain. Looking at the screen again, he suddenly wishes Baby would use her mouth to play the lollipop game on him. He can't ask their pure, pretty Baby to do anything so naughty.

His cheeks turn pink and he snatches his hand away from his stiffie, embarrassed. Daddy said to let Baby initiate play when she's ready. In fact, he’s under strict instructions not to get inside the playpen with her.

“Tin-goesth?” Baby murmurs around her binky, not tearing her eyes from the screen. She leans back on her haunches, putting more pressure on the bear and her privates, but it doesn't seem like enough for her. She ruts shamelessly into her bear, faster now, cheeks pink and eyes glassy.

Little watches for a bit before making a decision. He can't get in and help her, but he can show her what to do. Pulling down his pants, he blushes. He’s all stiff and tingly, and Baby will see it! He steels himself and pulls down his big boy undies, coming around the front of the playpen, winkie out.

What he sees makes his heart squeeze. Baby's tired herself out, humping hard and fast, getting nowhere but more tingly. She's laying on her bear, not even looking at the movie, twitching her hips while tears squeeze out of her eyes.

On seeing her Bubba come around her playpen, she jerks up, embarrassed and on edge.

“Ting-goess, hewp pwease?” She whimpers, scrambling on her knees to the bars of her playpen to grab her big Bubba's hand before seeing his stiffy poking out under his shirt.

She doesn't shy away from him, looking from his stiffy to the screen and then back to him.

“Ye, Baby, I help, I help!” She's asked, so he's finally allowed. He takes the hand she’d holding, reaches down and plunges it into her padding to find her tingly parts.

“‘S okay, Baby?” he whispers in her ear when she eeps in surprise.

“ye, ye, ye Bubba, need hewp tingoes ye” she chants, closing her eyes when he makes contact with her baby parts through all that slick, feeling her tiny winkie pulse.

“Nnnn, Bubba!” she spits her paci out, holding onto his arm. Just like Daddy showed him, he doesn't have to do much.

“Girl winkies are much smaller and more sensitive. Just make little circles, fast and soft. Let her decide the rest.” Daddy's coaching for the last week rings in Little’s ears.

She's rutting on his fingers now, hard and fast.

“Feels good, Baby? Bubba wan make you feel good.”

Baby nods without speaking, her sweet mouth open and her little nipples hard on his arm. Her hips jerk and his whole hand suddenly feels hot and wet as Baby hollers out,

“Bub-bahhh!” She puts both hands on his arm and swirls her hips one more time, shivering, sweet and happy.

He pulls his hand out, proud of his ability to help her make tingles. He stands back up and leans forward to check on her in her playpen. His stiffy jumps, slid between the bars.

Instead of slumped down, relaxing after tingles, Baby was back on her knees, so close it startles him. She looked up at him, pink lips puffy and open, eyes wide.

“tank you Bubba,” she whispers, her innocent blinking making his hand itch to do big kid touches on himself.

“Good job, Baby! Tingles feel good?” She moves in closer, her eyes slide over to the screen where different pairs of their favorite mystery gang are playing the lollipop game.

Her eyes take in his stiffy poking through the bars and she leans so close he can feel her breath on it as she murmurs

“Bubba need ting-goes?”

His hips ram into the bars as Baby sucks on him, pulling him into her mouth like a big binky. She swallows and he squeaks, trying to stay still like Daddy does, but it's hard.

He wants to touch her, hold her close, but doesn't want to scare her.

The lollipop game!

His eyes cross and he understands more why Daddy loves this game. The tingles feels so strong, he certainly won't last much– he remembers how Daddy does stickies so they aren't yucky in his mouth.

“Baby!! Bubba's gotta-ah-make stickies, ummm don-oh oh-here!”

He pulls out quickly enough that she looks shocked, and he pops her binky back in.

He can feel his tingles running up his back already and wraps his hand around his stiffy just into time to pump stickies out onto the floor. Baby's mouth felt so good, he wants to reward her.

But when he turns to her in her playpen, she's holding her bear, still on her knees, tears in her eyes again.

“Baby??”

“did bad? did bad ting-goes for Bubba? why go ‘way?”

“No!!” He climbs over her playpen easily, settling in behind her to hold her around her bare tummy.

He kisses her sweet pink cheek and pops her displaced binky back in again.

“Felt TOO good,” he murmurs in her ear, naturally rocking her back and forth, holding her distressed body under she relaxed.

“too good?” She whispers.

“Ye, felt like–” he points at the screen, where a boy character was screwing up his face and the girl pulled off to rub him hard until his stickies arced up comically high to hit the ceiling, ‘felt like dat, Baby. Felt so good, like I hadda essplode.”

Her crinkly butt bumped his softening winkie and he groaned until he realized she was looking hard at the screen. Her hips stuttered when he spoke.

“‘splode? Bubba felt-?” She points at the screen, hips thrusting

“Ye, Baby, you did so good,” Little feels naughty when he asks, “Baby need more?”

She nods and he reaches inside her padding again, tapping his watch twice before he does.

Daddy will show her bigger tingles. Baby needa essplode.

#maple answers #maple asks #maple writes #agepl@y

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sephirothsplaything · 5 months ago

Text

DNA| Sec.80 high power-chapter 18

A/N: Rhaenys is rolling in her grave(ashes) this is easily my fav chapter, and I think it shows!! Aemond and Rhaella matching each others freak>>>

TW: Slight violence, sexual happenings(nothing too explicit), Rhaella is a top by nature, drugging??? yah rhaella is a freakazoid as usual!!

This is horribly unedited sorry im tired LONG ASS CHAPTER GET COMFY

This is the story of Lady Rhaella Targaryen the I;the strange one and her role in the Dance Of Dragons. Loved by few and feared by many.

The blood of the dragon runs in Targaryen's veins. Something else runs in Rhaella.

BLACK TARGARYEN OC/READER

PARINGS: Aemond,Cregan, slight Jace, slight Addam, original charecter

read the last chapter here!

𝐑𝐇𝐀𝐄𝐋𝐋𝐀 𝐖𝐎𝐍𝐃𝐄𝐑𝐄𝐃 𝐈𝐅 𝐓𝐇𝐈𝐒 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐀 𝐃𝐄𝐂𝐈𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐓𝐇 𝐎𝐕𝐄𝐑𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐅𝐈𝐃𝐄𝐍𝐂𝐄.

Astris had led her to the doors of the brothel, assuring that she would stand guard from the outside. She had not yet entered, however the smells of perfume had already reached her nose.

Admittedly, Rhaella had not planned this far. What would she even ask when she finally laid eyes on the woman?

Briefly, she felt for her dagger, still in its place. It would be hard to kill in a small space such as this, but not impossible.

Upon entering, the sounds of laughter and moans filled her ears. It was an unsightly scene, causing her face to heat up.

Averting her eyes to the floor,she made her way to the front counter. Although her hair was covered,Rhaella highly doubted anyone here would know her from eyes alone.

"Are you lost,girl?" A woman said to her. Rhaella looked at her for a moment before averting her eyes to one of the dancers. A silver golden -haired girl holding fabric fans over her naked body.

A pretty girl by all accounts,Rhaella found it particularly hard to look away.

"I'd like to see Madame Sylvie," Rhaella said, placing some coins on the table.

The woman looked at her, as if assessing her looks.

"If it is work you are looking for,you could stand to do better." The woman said,taking a hand to Rhaella's face,causing her to lean back for fear of her hair being discovered.

"It's not for work." Rhaella stated bluntly. The woman raised a brow,taking her hand away.

"So you are one of those?" She said,gesturing for Rhaella to follow. "Coin is coin I suppose."

Rhaella followed the woman through the sea of naked people doing less than savory things. It was not as if she was a maiden,but her experience paled in comparison to the things her eyes laid upon.

"Sylvie?" The woman pulled the curtain back,"There's a client for you."

Rhaella was left alone, staring at this woman--Sylvie. She was certainly older,much more than Aemond,but not ugly. Her maturity was brought out in a bawdy figure with long brown hair.

Disappointment panged inside of Rhaella--She had hoped the woman was ugly.

"I must admit." Sylvie began,a curious smile on her face. "I never bedded a girl before."

Rhaella did not respond, opting to remain stiff in place. Any sentence she thought about voicing died in her throat.

"Well don't be shy, come." Sylvie patted the spot next to her on the bed.

A bed Aemond had likely laid in many a time. Jealousy found itself in her again.

"You'd enjoy it more, I think." Rhaella finally spoke, sitting on the bed with a notable distance.

"Girls are much softer," Rhaella continued. She removed her cloak completely,revealing her long silver braids.

"I fear that is not me, however." She pulled her dagger out, pointing it at Sylvie.

Rhaella greatly relished the look of fear on the woman's face. Many an idea ran through the girl's head,but she chose restraint instead.

"You scream and I shall cut your throat," Rhaella said.

Sylvie’s mouth closed,still in shock. Her silence was welcome to Rhaella–She needed to clear her mind.

“I am told the prince visits you often.” Rhaella said again,absentmindedly twirling her dagger–As he would.

“You think I am privy to his doings?” Sylvie said,keeping her eye on the knife.

Rhaella stared at her blankly. Somehow,she couldnt be so sure as to why–She knew he likely told her something that could prove to be useful.

“I know you are.” Rhaella decided. “So you shall tell me everything.”

“Did Queen Rhaenyra send you?” Sylvie questioned. Rhaella felt her patience dwindle by the second.

“I am here out of my own volition.”

“Ah.” Sylvie said. “So it is personal.”

Rhaella’s eye twitched. She was not being taken seriously.

Lunging forward,Rhaella pinned Sylvie’s body harshly onto the bed.She brought the dagger to her neck,holding it there.

“I am Rhaella of House Targaryen,daughter of Prince Daemon Targaryen.” Her tone was riddled with vexation although it hardly raised above a calm whisper. “And I find myself with little patience for a wench's games.

Sylvie’s breath quickened as her eyes widened,gazing into Rhaella’s darkened purple ones.

‘This girl is a monster’ She thought,knowing better than to voice it.

“So you are.” Sylvie’s voice stuttered out. “Apologies,my lady.”

Rhaella allowed her to sit up,still gripping her dagger harshly.

“What does he tell you?” Rhaella asked again. Sylvie’s eyes briefly darted to the closed curtain,but dared not to move.

“He laments,mostly.” Sylvie recounts,after a while.

“What of?” Rhaella asks,though she nearly regrets it.

“His brushes with death,how your father tried to have him killed.”

Rhaella knew this much,she was there when Rhaenyra asked for it to be done.

“And?” Annoyance tinged in Rhaella’s voice.

“He thinks your father fears him.” Sylvie said.

Rhaella scoffed,nearly laughing. What a pathetic display.

“Aemond is a child,it is Vhagar that’s feared.” She responded.

“And yet,you've come to me for information against him.” Sylvie retorted.

It was a truth Rhaella was forced to swallow. In all actuality,this woman was simply paid for her service.

However,Rhaella did not care.

“I had hoped for something of sustenance,not the whimpers of a boy.” Rhaella spit out.

Her time was being wasted,time that could've been spent sneaking into the red keep.

“He mentioned that he burnt his brother during the battle.” Sylvie said suddenly.

Rhaella blinked. Sure Aemond seemed particularly insatiable for power,not shirking to terrify the realm. But he was loyal–Whatever twisted loyalty he had.

But to hurt Aegon? Is that not the very person who he was fighting for?

“That is..” Rhaella trailed off. “That is a lie.”

“You wield a dagger to my throat.” Sylvie stated. “It is he who said it,I do not lie.”

Rhaella stood abruptly,pacing around the room. She did not know Aemond as well as she initially thought.

If he was willing to kill his own brother just for a chance to sit the throne…

What could he do to her?

Strategies came to and from Rhaella’s mind. But one in particular shined.

Aemond would never expect it,certainly not from her.

“Thank you for your time.” Rhaella said briskly,turning to leave.

“He talked about you,briefly.” Sylvie called out,forcing Rhaella to pause.

“What?” Aemond spoke of her to this whore? Perhaps to make fun of her,to talk about her lack of experience and how quick she was to sully herself.

“From when the two of you were children,I think.” Sylvie mused,recalling the memory wistfully.

Rhaella did not move,for it would be to kill this wretched woman.

“How he described you,a quiet little thing that always knew what to say”

When Sylvie was sure Rhaella wouldn’t move,she continued.

“He cares for you a lot,if it's any consultation.” Sylvie finished.

But no,it was not a consultation. In fact,it was the very last thing she wanted to hear. How could he break her resolve so easily? Aemond wasn't even present and she felt her heart grow heavy.

She wished to rip it from her chest.He had killed her grandmother with no care,chased her sister through the skies and actively blocked the queen from her throne.

Wasn’t it enough? For her to hate him?

Aemond debilitated Rhaella in ways she could not comprehend.

Rhaella said nothing else,walking out. She ignored the girls and the front woman.

She ignored Astris who was still there waiting for her.

“My lady?” She called out,hurrying to keep to Rhaella’s side. “Did you find what you were looking for?”

Rhaella shook her head.

Astris was mildly concerned at her state. Whatever Sylvie told her had caused some obvious strife. Perhaps she described in detail what Aemond gets up to with her.

“Would you like me to kill her?” Astris suggested. Not as if she had any love for the woman.

“Which tunnel in Maegor’s holdfast leads to his chamber.” Rhaella said,voice distant. She couldn't bear to speak his name at the moment.

“The left but-.” Rhaella had already begun walking in the castle's direction.

“It is dangerous,he may hurt you!”

“Perhaps.” Rhaella said.

Maybe Aemond would have her hung in the outer courts,daring anyone to try him again.

But she needed to know the state of his mind. They had left with many things untalked of.

If she could just witness it,perhaps it would give her push to move on and fight this war earnestly.

Rhaella stood just outside of the tunnel,staring into the stark darkness. Somehow,the possibility of her death did little to deter her from what she planned to do.

“How much of that concoction does he need to ingest?” Rhaella asked. Astris’s mouth pressed into a thin line of worry,yet she answered anyway.

“For him to sleep through the night,only half.” Astris said. Rhaella hummed.

She would ensure Aemond missed the riots all together. The matter of how remained in the air however.

“My lady..” Astris knew she could do little to change Rhaella’s mind.

“If I do not return to our original meeting point,do not linger here.” Rhaella breathed out calmly “Return to Dragonstone at once.”

She did not wait for Astris to respond as she entered Maegor’s tunnels. Rhaella vaguely remembered her way around,from before. The silence was deafening but serene,Rhaella at this moment had no fear.

When she thought she’d arrived at the right spot,Rhaella carefully drew her dagger walking up the staircase. If Aemond was in his chamber,he would not see her immediately. Rhaella figured she was quicker than him,should she need to escape.

Pushing through the hidden door,Rhaella found herself inside Aemonds room–And he was nowhere to be found.

She knew it was incredibly stupid,to linger around like this,but she couldn't help it. His chamber was obnoxiously large,as was his bed. Rhaella walked near the sitting area in the middle of the room. Maps and plans were splayed out on the table,as well as coins.

Crouching down,her hands traced over them. It looked like he was planning something,although she couldn't quite make out what.

Near them,stood a pitcher and some wine cups,one being slightly filled. A smile litted onto Rhaella’s face. Taking the vile,she poured the liquid fully into the pitcher,shaking it around for good measure.

When she was satisfied,Rhaella stood to her feet. Aemond would drink from the pitcher,hopefully this night–Allowing the queen rhaenya’s plan to go smoothly.

The sound of footsteps caused Rhaella to jump,reaching for her dagger. While Rhaella was already in a rather daring position,she was no fool.

Quickly and silently,Rhaella hid behind one of the large dressers near the wall. She saw a flash of white hair and it took everything in her power to not flee at once.

She heard Aemond sigh,taking off his gloves and placing his sword onto the table. Her eyes narrowed,trying to see as best she could.

Was that Blackfyre? He was shameless.

Rhaella’s legs began to cramp from her position,she needed to move. Aemond turned away,beginning to unbutton his coat.

Rhaella stood again,carefully removing herself from the hiding spot. There was no conceivable way she could leave without him spotting her so…

“Do not move.” Rhaella spoke first,lifting her knife into the air. Aemond froze at the sound of her voice. Surely he had gone mad,what was she doing in here?

But when he turned to face her,it was undeniable. Rhaella’s eyes were slightly darker from when he had last seen them. It was still her,coming back to him despite everything.

“Mittys iksā.” Aemond said before he could stop himself. ‘You’re an idiot’

Rhaella’s gaze bore into his own,hauntingly. “And you are unprotected.”

They watched each other carefully,not daring to move any closer. Aemond was sure he could overpower her quite easily–And yet he found himself unwilling to take the chance.

Aemond glanced at his sword,then back to Rhaella. “How did you get past the kingsguard?”

Taking a small step forwards,Rhaella raised her dagger higher,scoffing.

“Your kingsguard are shit,but I'm sure you know that.”

Aemond’s lips formed into a small smile. The rage in Rhaella’s eyes did little to deter him;Oh how he missed those violet gems,harsh like any fine stone. He took a step to her,noticing how she made no move.

“I’ve missed you.” Aemond said. He ate away at how her body shivered in response to his words,like basic instinct.

“Have you?” Rhaella spoke flatly,careful to hide the whirlwind of emotions that stirred inside. How dare he stand there,words like honey on his lips—And she longed for the words anyhow.

Aemond blinked with an unabashed softness,taking in her form.

“Or rather,you've been busy making a name for yourself.” Rhaella spit out venomously.

“I’ve only done what is necessary for the preservation of my house.” Aemond responded,although his voice wavered slightly. It had not been so long,and here she was doing it again,reading into him in a way only she could.

“Necessary?” Rhaella hissed. “Is that what you call slaughtering my grandmother?”

“She was a traitor to the realm,I acted accordingly.” Aemond replied coolly.

Rhaella’s grip tightened inhumanly. If she was swift enough,his throat could be slashed in an instant. But she found herself unable to move.

“And Aegon?” Rhaella said. “Was he another piece to rid yourself of?”

Aemond’s head snapped to her,glaring. “What do you speak of?”

He had forgotten the fact–Rhaella always seemed to know everything,how it had been.

“Should I say congratulations,Kinslayer?” Rhaella piled on,making no attempt to hide her fury.

“Oh,my apologies,I meant Prince Regent.”

Aemond’s temper instantly flared. She knew nothing of the turmoil he had gone through to get here. Standing alone against the enemy,securing allies for his house. Rhaella could not know the countless nights of sleep lost to her,thinking about having her by his side.

She was equal parts calming him and fanning the flames of his troubles.

“Is that what you’ve come here to do?” Aemond watched her carefully,almost enamored. “To kill me and take revenge?”

Rhaella did not grace him with an answer–The truth of the matter,in all the many lifetimes that could be,she could never raise her hand against him,obsession kept her chained to the pits of their shared misery.

When met with silence,Aemond’s smirk deepened.

“You’ve aided in usurping my stepmother’s throne,an act deserving of death.” Rhaella stated,hoping her voice did little to give away her invisible resolve.

Aemond scoffed in near disbelief. “Do not do that.” He said. “Not with me.”

Rhaella’s brain buzzed with hesitation. At the slight misstep,Aemond lunged at her briskly.

She struggled against his burdening hold,although she did not scream. Rhaella thrashed wildly to no avail–Aemond was stronger. For a moment,Rhaella felt a single cold drop of fear in her heart. Would he send for a guard and kill her?

Aemond harshly shoved her chest to the wall,wrapping her hands with an uncomfortable grip.The flesh of his hands practically burnt her,it was only then Rhaella was able to form a single clear thought.

She did not come here for revenge,rather to seek out the horribly tainted love only Aemond could give her.

Only him. No one else.

When Rhaella allowed her knife to fall,Aemond knew he’d won. He leaned further into her with little care for how she felt.

“I don’t care about Rhaenyra or her fucking bastards climbing for something they think is theirs.” Aemond spoke lowly into Rhaella’s ear as she continued to squirm.

“And.” Aemond adds,his soft breath gently blowing the loose strands of her hair.

“I truly think that you do not care either.”

Rhaella’s foot moved to kick Aemond harshly in his knee,causing his grip to loosen just enough for her to get away,but not too far.

When Aemond recovered,he was met with a fiery slap delivered by Rhaella’s hand.

“Do not presume to grab me in such a manner.” Rhaella said. Her chest heaved slightly and the slow trickles of desire invaded her blood.

Aemond felt it too,the smug smile never left his face.

“Am I wrong?”

Rhaella glances to the pitcher with the wine she would soon make him ingest. He wouldn’t forgive her for it and the thought made her body heat further.

“I hate you.” Rhaella said,with little bite in her tone. They were back to their familiar games,the struggle for dominance. Unbeknownst to Aemond,he had already since lost the fight.

“Then why are you shaking so harshly?”

What girl wouldn’t shake in the presence of her own monster? Her own lover.

But then,she was perhaps much worse.

So,Rhaella kissed Aemond with a fervor that caused him to stumble back slightly. She would never allow herself to be completely finished with him.

In this war,they would be each other’s executioner– Rhaella could not possibly think of anything else more enthralling.

Aemond moved his hands to her waist instinctively, unable to help himself.

Through their shared bated breaths into each other,he spoke again.

“I could have you killed.” He said,hands tracing the curves of her waist.

Rhaella hummed into another kiss,her darkened eyes flitting to his predatorily.

“I do believe it would be in your best interest to do so.” She responded.

Aemond couldn't think about that now,only focused on how Rhaella’s lips gently met his.

Rhaella seemed more sure of herself this time around–Like she had gained a new surge of confidence. He could little but allow her to tug and shove him to his bed,pushing him into it roughly.

Somehow,he preferred this,being at her mercy.

Rhaella’s brows furrowed as she tilted her head slightly–Like any dragon would.

“You have damned me,I think.” Rhaella said,though she did not care to elaborate further.

“As have you.” Aemond replied without thinking. Rhaella sat herself on top of him,eyes searching his clothed body. Time was little and less for the two dragons who wished only to dance. Perhaps it was by the Gods design,for them to greet each other with the briefest of goodbyes.

Rhaella’s hands traced the fabric of his tunic,glancing back to his face and he felt compelled to continue.

“You have all of me.” Aemond whispered,so softly Rhaella almost did not hear.

“I know.” Rhaella whispered back. It was not a response,rather a confession. Aemond too had all of her,and it was as unfortunate of a truth as any. She would betray him anyhow.

For the kinslayer knew his strange one by heart,and it infuriated her greatly.

Aemond sat up slightly to kiss her again,unable to be away for too long. Somewhere in between the exchange,he had shed Rhaella of the dress she wore,leaving her in naught but a flimsy chemise that slid down from her shoulders.

His hands slid under the thing,causing Rhaella to gasp softly as his delicate fingers imprinted over her bare thigh. Aemond had yet to hear a sound much sweeter.

This night at least,Aemond intended to draw out a symphony from her.

The cacophony of pants and faint moans echoed through the chamber. For the first time in what seemed like forever,Rhaella’s mind was void of any real thoughts.

Aemond attempted to calm his harsh breaths as he laid his head onto Rhaella’s naked chest. She had not spoken much during the fact,however her one question pierced his mind achingly.

“Do you take me as I am?” He recalled how small her voice was,as if she was worried for what he may reply with.

“I can do nothing else.” Assurance wafted to her ears as she felt all of him,like he had sworn to her.

So,they laid there,hand in unlovable hand, Aemond’s fingertips marked her palms,tracing over the healing scar.

“Who did that to you?” Aemond’s eye looked up to her briefly. Rhaella had been staring across the room for a while now but was brought back by the sound of his voice.

The cut she sustained from her knife to blood the cannibal had closed up mostly,leaving a small,rough mark.

He need not know that.

“It was my own doing.” Rhaella said,attempting to tug her hand away. He would not let her.

“Why would you do such a thing?” Aemond asked with a gentleness unlike himself.

Rhaella shifted slightly underneath the blankets. She was much too hazy to think of a sufficient lie,so she told the truth.

“It was an exchange of sorts,I suppose.” Rhaella said. Her hand played at the white strands of Aemond’s hair with the tenderness of one who had never loved.

If he wished to pry further,Rhaella did not allow him the chance.

“Tell me something,and do be truthful.” Rhaella spoke.

Aemond’s arms held her into his body tighter with a hum,as if it could prevent her from leaving him.

“What did you feel when you watched my grandmother fall from the sky?”

Aemond paused,wondering if this was some sort of trap. Rhaella’s head leaned onto his own,waiting for what he would say.

“Satisfaction in being victorious.” He said finally. Aemond looked to her again, however Rhaella’s lips were made into the smallest of smiles. Despite them both being in such a vulnerable state,it was unnerving.

“And what about overturning Rook's Rest?” Rhaella pressed her naked form,causing a second wave of desire to course through Aemond’s veins.

“The first of many battles I intended to win.” Aemond said.

Rhaella leaned down to kiss him again,letting it linger for a beat of time. He had not the faintest of clues–The acts of revenge she intended to release. For as much love she held for Aemond Targaryen,Rhaella’s spite and lust of blood held her much tighter.

He was about to lose,if he hadn’t begun already. Whatever was wrong with Aemond,was also terribly wrong with Rhaella.

Wiggling herself from his grip,Aemond made a disapproving noise as Rhaella stood from the bed.

He watched as she went over to the table,pouring the sitting wine into a single cup.

“After all this,will you still return to Dragonstone?” Aemond asked,already knowing the answer.

“I cannot leave my sister alone,you know this.” Rhaella replied. Aemond sighed,sitting up in his bed.

“You could have married me,stayed with me.” Aemond said. “You would never meet harm.”

Rhaella looked into the cup,weighing her options. Seeing little way out,she drank enough of the liquid to satisfy.

“That is an impossible thing to promise,Aemond.” Rhaella handed the cup to him,watching the wine go down his throat.

“And I promise it to you anyway.” Aemond said. Rhaella took back the cup,looking into it. He had drunk more than enough,so Rhaella finished the rest of it.

“You and I both know that this” Rhaella gestured between the two of them. “It will only end in bloodshed.”

Aemond leaned against the bedframe,studying her carefully. Rhaella’s braids were messy as were the loose curls of silver hair that streamed from them. Light markings lined her chest—He thought she was stunning.

“So let it be.” Aemond concluded,tugging her body back into his own.

Rhaella allowed it,knowing this moment would succumb to the work of the sleeping liquid.

“I do wonder something though.” Rhaella mused as Aemond’s hand rested on the side of her thigh.

“Your mind never ceases,does it?” Aemond grumbled,eliciting a small pinch from Rhaella.

“Could you ever hate me?” Rhaella asked almost innocently.

“No,but not for a lack of trying.” Aemond replied immediately.

Rhaella pondered if he would feel any different after what she’d done to him. Instead,she let the silence consume both of them in a particular agony.

Aemond would likely not see her like this again,should they meet hereafter it would be on dragonback in battle.

In the dark and quiet,Rhaella felt herself become immensely drowsy from the wine. She slipped in and out of consciousness,blinking the sleepiness away in panic.

Rhaella could feel the small kisses Aemond was leaving into her shoulder blade come to an eventual halt.

He was asleep,finally. Rhaella took in his sleeping,nearly angelic form. His face was so gentle and it nearly pained her to leave him like this. She glanced down at his hands,one draped over her and the other clenched into a fist.

Aemond remained at war,even in his dreams.

When he would wake,he would hate her–Rhaella was sure of it.

And now they would be equal.

#house of the dragon #black oc #oc character #aemond targaryen #black reader #daemon targaryen #baela targaryen #rhaenyra targaryen #rhaena of pentos #aemond x reader #hotd fanfic #hotd #hotd spoilers #hotd season 2 #house targaryen #house of the dragon fanfic

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hausofmamadas · 1 year ago

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SE LA ARRANCA A MORDIDAS | mystery of Amado's anonymous lady-hustlers, solved

⁂

Holy father who art in heaven, do I have some fucking cracked ass head-canon nonsense for us to👏🏽 day👏🏽 …………….. let’s get to it shall we??

so idk if anyone anyone being the largely nonexistent narcos fandom aka the void Im speaking into remembers that one scene from Narcos in S3 where sleazy!OG!Amado told that one story about those sex workers who robbed him blind, mid-mamadita?

anyone ..... no?

dwdwdw that's okay bc I brought some visual aids to assist in our collective remembrance of this glorious occasion

⁂

The scene starts like this: 👇

Okay, yeah, right? legendary? legendary. just truly legendary behavior skfjskj on all fronts. but the identities of these social justice warriors— no wait activists— no wait, crusad— er no, patriarchy demolishers? iconic crimies with a penchant for for mid-fellatic felonies like armed robbery have been completely anonymous thus far.

…………… until now.

Bc as always, Narcoverse papis Doug Miro, Andrés Baiz, and Carlo Bernard, never fail to fill in the blanks except when they do cause Griselda left a lot to be desired and this is arguably the best ep of the show which, yeah. it’s never ideal when the best ep of a 6ep limited series is the 2nd one si me entiendes😬😬😬 but we digress because im 99.99999999999999% sure if these two sex workers from Griselda aren’t also the two legends who hustled Amado’s dick money out his pants pockets without having to fire so much as a single shot, I’m fairly certain they’re at least inspired by and carrying the torch aka bottling and distilling that Big Dick Energy to perfection of those brave women.

What gave me this idea? So glad you asked dear reader you didn’t but we’ll just pretend you did cause this my haus KEKW…. No like even I rolled my eyes at my own self for that but i couldn’t refrain either.

It all happened when I was nursing my new obsession with a one, Mr. Darío Sepúlveda a name I would most certainly believe to be fucking fake were he not an irl human bean.

👇👇 THIS slice of sweet, cherry pie right tf here

And I stumbled upon this one specific part, where the look on this chick’s face is SO FUCKINGKDHDHDGWVE SIMILAR to Amado’s face, when he’s explaining 👇👇👇👇👇👇👇how the burgling commences when the gurgling is interrupted by with an uncomfortable silence, as this chick proceeds to, hog still in mouth, cease any and all throat activity and fuckingskdfjskl just stare. up. at. him.

all 🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️🙇🏻‍♀️

Like tell me homegirl’s face here👇👇 👇👇 doesn’t look just like it????????????

YOU CANTSJSHSJSHWUS YOU cANT. EVIDENCE IS IRREFUTABLE.

Anyway. Movingright along.

So, if aforementioned homegirl is the 🙇🏻‍♀️ from la historia del grande señor de los cielos, then that makes this ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️ ... homegirl’s accomplice

with the👇👇sidearm

and like the general only slightly subtle "I eat dicks like urs for breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a midnight snack" vibes that this duo is serving throughout but esp below bc never will I ever not refer to a fuckboy as mancito from now until I'm in my grave alsdkjfa like MANCITO. THE WAY SHE SAYS IT WITH SUCH ALSKDJFKS CONTEMPT, CAN YOU STAND IT????? makes it so clear in my mind's eye how they could 100000000000%% be the unnamed heroes thieves from Amado's little story

also full 180 just on the low but can we all moment of silence for this 👇👇 FUCKINGSDLDFJ LOOK ON DARIO'S FACE WHEN SHE CORRECTS HIM, "quien te dijo eso? ... un mancito?" LIKE HE FUCKIGNSLDFKJSLKJ KNOWS, HE KNOWS HE HAS ERRED ON THIS PATH, HE KNOWS HE CANNOT PASS GO, CANNOT COLLECT 200 DOLLARS AND HE HAS THE GOOD SENSE TO BE GRACIOUS ABOUT IT AND IMAS;DFLIJA;LWEJF;KAJWE;FAKJ; SFUCKINGS DFKLJSLDF JA;K CRYING, SCREAMING, THROWING UP, INCONSOLABLE. LIKE LOOK. AT THIS. OKAY, THAT A MAN, NO MANCITO

*smacks own face, jiggles head back and forth, takes deep breath* anyway.... back to the story

and this is where this prob super unhinged really solidifies bc let's join hands class and pledge alliegance to the most impressive and noteworthy alpha but in the most non-cringe way assertion of dominance I have ever fucking witnessed in all my days. Like, legit the next time i'm into a dude the way i say this like it's not an 'if' bc RIP to my love life lbr fuck all that playing coy, fuck all that flirting. We just gonna get right to the point bc imma climb all over his lap, purr in his face, and ask about his hobbies like it's the 1978 equivalent of a Hinge profile SKSKKSK

and the next time I am spurned I will absolutely grab his junk in a naked hahahaksdjfk grab for a proper leash power to gain the upper hand in the situation and shame any and all menfolk who claim to not like me bc I'm not their 'type.' which like sksjsjsjs admittedly poor Dario just said that as a pretense to get the chisme from the chick who hates Grislenda bc the look of unconcealed regret on his face when Mistress Mamma Crotch Snatcher Morton gets up seems like a good indicator he would've paid to play with his balls

BUT LIKE SIDE BY SIDE WITH AMADO GETTING TO THE metaphorical CLIMAX bc I sincerely doubt they let him bust, mid-robbery OF HIS STORY, CAN WE NOT SEE HOW CLEARLY THESE TWO WOMEN WERE THE ONES WHO JACKED AMADO OFF– NO WAIT THEY DECIDEDLY DID NOT DO THAT ALL OF AMADO’S SHIT, LIKE CAUGHT PAPI WITH HIS ACTUAL PANTS DOWN SKSJSB

and lest any of us were convinced that Lady "Hijueputa Mandona Esa" who hates Griselda wasn't the one holding the gun on Toque, telling Amado she's gonna have her friend chew clear through his disco stick like some froot by the foot, please refer to exhibit B here ☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️☝️where she's manspreading for jesus in these fucking hot pants. I mean try to tell me that ain't power. c'mon

AND THEN THE WAY SHE FUCKINGSLDFKJSL HUSTLES DARIO FOR EXTRA CASH, ALL "you gotta pay me more than that pittance bc yeah, she were a mouthy bitch but I didn't hate her that bad" ensuring he had no choice but to leave a tip, just like our pobre mujeriego, himbo extraordinaire, Sleazy!OG!Amado