#im living the 'solo poly' life

[shutupposhos]

so like, let's say you've matched with your ex's ex on two different apps. but like here's the story:

me and J meet years ago. get a bit involved but it was never really a relationship. like it was fun and we were def into each other but they were not fully present. so they dissappear and kinda ghost me. im confused and upset. a few months later we come across each other, I've already met someone else and gotten pretty quickly into a relationship. they apologise that they messed me around, they were having a mental health spiral. which i knew nothing about because they disappeared and didn't tell me they needed time away. and i didn't know how to broach the conversation and had low self esteem so just assumed they actually realise they didnt like me. so i didn't know what to make of it all and moved on with my life.

so years later, been married and divorced (lol), living with my mum, living my hot confident single life. and i haven't seen or heard from them in years. they suddenly follow me on instagram and we lightly DM. and i again don't know what to make of this, but i always liked them as a person generally but maybe i still have a thing for them. but theyre in a serious relationship, as i can see them and their gf (I'll call her R) all over their insta. so im feeling confused and weirdly guilty.

anyway, we actually meet up a couple times in the park and im assuming they want to be friends again perhaps bc i couldn't imagine them as the cheating type i guess. and i want to meet up to understand how i feel about seeing them again. turns out i STILL STUPIDLY FANCY THEM.

so eventually i text them saying i dont know what to think about them reaching out again after the awkward history we have. and that actually I've realised im still really into them but i dont want to overstep on their relationship and i want to know what their intentions were in originally reaching out.

turns out J and R are in a NEWLY opened relationship. so they reached out to me intending for friendship but realised they were just telling themselves that to feel better about it. and we talked about how things ended last time and they apologised and said they always felt bad about it. and im like...ok cool so shall we meet up again now knowing both our intentions.

so we talk a bit more but dont get to meet again. meanwhile, J and R end up breaking up and i say "its cool if you need some time" and they were like "no let's meet up, let me just check my schedule"

and then i just dont hear from them again but theyre still watching my stories and its pissing me off that they've ghosted me again without just saying "actually, things are really hard at the moment and i cant give you the time either of us would like." so i kick then off my instagram and unfollow them.

SO a year later i see their ex, R, on the apps and im like...she's hot ngl and i debate swiping on them. and we now matched on two apps.

but i dont know if R knows who i am in relation to J. bc i know who R is. and i dont know if theyre on good terms with each other or what. so could this get weird? should i avoid this situation? how do i let her know i had a thing with her ex years again, and then again when they just opened up their relationship? will she even care?

grats if you read all of that lol.

[sunboki]

KOREA'S MOST WANTED (DEAD OR ALIVE) : SUNBOKI

🎥 : Christopher Bahng x fem. reader ( with hints of other attraction ((mainly 3racha cause im a whore)) no poly )

TROPE. non-idol au, criminal! au, enemies to lovers, friends to lovers, angst, fluff, implied smut

WORD COUNT. 6.8k & 33 minute read

WARNINGS. smut, blood, guns/weapons, shoot-out, murder, mentions of drugs and poison, descriptive violence, suggestiveness, manipulation, death(not major characters), cursing

PLAYLIST

AUG'S NOTES. a weird spin to a not-quite mafia au but i love the lore.. enjoy. if you decide to read, feedback is always appreciated!!

SYNOPSIS. Eight notoriously wanted criminals work solo. They always have. Except when their dark work and concealed identities are put at risk, they find themselves with no other choice but to work together—and what better place to do so than the back fields of a house in the middle of nowhere? The location was ideal, until you open the doors of your grandparents barn and accidentally meet Korea’s most wanted.

or alternatively

In which stumbling in the wrong place at the wrong time leaves you face to face with some of the most-wanted criminals in all of South Korea.

CRIMINAL #0001 — BAHNG, CHRISTOPHER.

CRIMINAL RECORD

Christopher has been convicted of illegal weapon trafficking on eighteen counts of federal offenses. He is notoriously dangerous. Please proceed with caution.

⭑ REWARD

⎯ CRIMINAL FILES (additional cases)

The only thing illuminating your walk to the barn is your phone light and the hardly helpful moon peeking between heavy clouds.

You’ve done this a billion times, but tonight there’s just something ..unsettling. You can’t put your finger on it.

Shaking the thought from mind, you fiddle with the small lock hitched onto wide, dark red barn doors, untangling rusted chains like routine. That is, until you hear a sound. An unusual sound, an unnerving sound.

By that time you’d already pushed open the doors, and the weight of what sat in front of you—the weight of what was responsible for the sound—made you feel faint.

“Who.. Who are you people?”

Every October you visit your grandparents (or whenever your schedule isn’t jam-packed, but most often in October) when the leaves are deep orange and red, dappling gravel driveways and leaving the once abundant trees bare of their spring greenery.

The weather, though overcast in the autumn season, never stays gray for too long if you wake up early enough. Your grandpa taught you that, how to witness the early morning view before being covered by clouds.

On this occasion, however, you certainly didn’t plan on waking up early, especially not while rooming in your comfortable old bedroom.

Your grandparents house, despite being in the middle of nowhere, was so homey, so familiar. You’d be sure to soak up as much of this easiness as you could before returning back to life, savor the moments the best you could.

“Have you heard?” Your grandmother utters, fingers expertly dicing fruits, gaze glued to the TV.

“Grandma, I just got here, so no I haven’t heard anything,” You laugh, dragging your luggage through the hallway while the drone of the latest news feature serves as background noise. Probably another celebrity split-up, you assume.

Surely, considering the stubborn woman’s frantic waving once you come back into the living room, beckoning you to watch with her.

“Look! They’re wrecking havoc everywhere recently. Folks are calling them ‘Korea’s most wanted.’” Shaking her head repeatedly, she points at the screen displaying a churned building left to nothing but ash.

You hum absentmindedly, listening to the reporter talk.

“Using the title the media has given, this building, once a printing firm, has been dissolved into ashes overnight. The attack is said to have been the doing of ‘The Arsonist’, a member of one of the most wanted people on the radar…”

“If you run into one of them,” Having completely forgotten about the other presence in the room, you flinch. “Call your Grandma, I’ll swat ‘em over the head with my shovel.”

Gesturing with an imaginary shovel in hand, you can’t help but laugh at her silliness, quickly shaking the lingering thought away.

Korea’s most wanted here? Here’s probably the last place they’d show up, too busy massacring the big cities to care about this old house.

Resorting to scurrying onto a kitchen stool, you fill in the nosy old lady on what life has been like, how work has been treating you, and all the other nosy questions your grandmother thinks up slicing apples.

By the time you look out the window, the sky is almost fully dark, until a sudden flash of headlights tells the household grandpa’s back from work, hopping from his rickety blue pickup truck to greet you. 

There’s a smile gracing his wrinkled features, regarding you like you were still eight years old. He’s a man of few words, but when he speaks, everyone listens. Similarly, when he tells you he loves you—something he barely does—the moment, whatever it may be, is special.

Settling in for the night, you help wash dishes and insist the stoic woman takes a seat before she breaks her back leaning over the sink, which she rolls her eyes and ignores no less.

Not like you expected anything else, she’d wash these dishes till the end of time knowing her.

“Y/n, dear, would you mind making sure the barn lamp is shut off? I’m worried it’ll catch fire if I forget.”

Speaking of the end of time, you hadn’t stepped foot in the barn in what felt to be decades, too occupied with the house and town to remember that ramshackle building outside.

Of course you said yes, deciding this was a prime opportunity to not forget in the process of slipping on a sweater to help battle the cold, approaching the barely visible building.

You think you hear someone talking but choose to ignore it, pretending it was the wind or something along those lines. It’s autumn and you’re plenty far away from suburban areas, so most likely an animal lie responsible.

That was, until you pry open the barn doors.

Immediately, a stranger with cat-like features has a serrated dagger held to your throat.

Closing your eyes instinctively, you wait to feel the cold metal breaking skin, hesitantly cracking open an eye to meet the attacker’s chilling stare boring into the side of your face.

He takes a few seconds to exchanges glances with another in the dimly lit space then back to your stock-still frame. Briefly, you feel your phone get pulled from your pocket but don’t budge, worried one wrong movement would automatically have the cold metal slitting your throat.

“Walk. Make the slightest move and nobody finds your body, understood?”

Shakily, you nod, feebly inching forward before getting shoved onto the container your grandpa kept extra tools in, splinters piercing the back of your thighs.

Wonderingly, your eyes flicker to each stranger surrounding you. Counting eight in total, some taller, some shorter, you gulp, outnumbered by a large margin you’re sure would be nearly impossible trying to escape from.

Without exchanging a word, one of the shorter, more muscular men steps forward, seeming to inspect you. His rough grip finds your chin, jerking your head from side to side then up to meet his honeyed brown eyes. They’re surprisingly kind compared to his demeanor.

“She’s pretty. Might earn us a good penny if you want, Bahng. Ain’t that right, sweetheart?” Cocking his brows, you swiftly rip your head out of his hand, wrinkling your nose with disgust.

A frothing dread fills your gut, and you think for a moment letting that man with the dagger kill you off would’ve been a better doom.

“Hands off, Bin. If we wanted to get a price we need her to be in good condition.” A voice from behind this so-called “Bin” responds, and you feel the overwhelming urge to hurl.

They’re talking about selling you, like you’re not even human. A pretty porcelain object available at their disposal.

Good condition? You feel sick. You can’t see the man who replied, but you doubt it’d make your gut feel any more uncomfortable.

“Aw c’mon guys,” Another voice you finally spot to your right interjects, sporting chubbier cheeks and appearing quite out of place in this group. “You’re scaring her, go easy.”

Bin scoffs. “Should she be comfortable? We’re gonna kill her anyway, Jisung. Right, Bahng?”

God. Who is this Bahng guy that’s apparently in charge and why does “Bin” want you dead so badly? Didn’t he just call you pretty, or were you blacking out?

“..Right, Bahng?”

Bin falters, backing up as the face belonging to “Bahng” ushers him to the side.

Bahng, at least in the scarce lighting, is scarily handsome. Dyed hair nearly an auburn shade, a strong jaw, and calculating, dusky brown eyes that appear equally as kind as Bin’s.

You’ve learned to not trust the deceit.

Suddenly, a thought strikes.

Any minute now your grandparents will realize how long you’ve been gone and start to worry.

Your heart drops.

No. Don’t come here, stay in the house. No no no no.

Automatically, words stumble out of your mouth.

“Please- kill me, sell me, I don’t care. My grandparents- they’re gonna come here, I can’t have them here. If they find me here I... Please.” Chest rising and falling unevenly, you continuously glance at the door.

Waiting, waiting.

“Please spare them. I don’t want them to get hurt.”

He doesn’t blink, doesn’t make any expression apparent on that handsome face of his. Observing.

You’re a spectacle, an interesting one at that.

“And if I spare you, what do I get in return, hm?”

You’re caught off guard.

In return? What does he mean in return?

Think. Think. What the hell could someone like him want? He has enough money, you’re sure.

Fine. Make it broad.

“Anything. Anything, I promise.” Pleading, you anxiously shuffling atop the box, swearing to have heard the sound of moving outside. Somewhere behind the two of you someone chokes a laugh. You can’t find it in yourself to care.

Poking his tongue into his cheek thoughtfully, he eventually signals to the others before you’re being escorted through the back door by a not-so gentle Bin and a very much apologetic Jisung, sparing a glance back to the home you’d only seen for one day.

And if what Bin said about killing you was true, you wonder if you’ll ever see it again.

.. .

Ducking into one of the two cars parked directly behind the barn, you’re assigned the passenger seat, accompanied by Bahng who’s driving, Jisung, and a long-haired boy sitting beside him in the backseat.

They’re all strikingly beautiful opposed to the blood you’re sure has stained their hands, especially the one next to Jisung with features resembling that of a prince. Everything about him seems too elegant to do any harm. You know that’s a lie.

Mapping out your surroundings, you shuffle in the leather seat, waiting until all three men get situated to slam the door ajar and run. Second instinct, no thoughts, just survival.

You run, run and run as fast as you can while the thump of shoes echo behind you. Far away, you have to get away. Get away get away get aw— a force slams into you from behind and you go toppling down.

Gasping as the air mercilessly ripped from your lungs returns, your vision adjusts, squirming thanks to the identity keeping you still. Bahng has you trapped below him, breath labored, effortlessly intimidating.

“Let— go of me!” You yell, voice betraying the utter desperation overtaking every fiber of your being.

He holds you down, meeting your eyes without fail as you struggle and shout. Shouting and screaming so loud into the darkness in fact, that the man finally covers your mouth with a hand as you tremble, watery gaze fixated on his. Burning, venomous hatred.

“I’m afraid that isn’t an option, sweetness. So you either walk back to the car or I go through things the hard way. What will it be?”

He thumbs the sweaty strands of hair stuck to your forehead, hand finally pulling off your mouth.

Hypocrite.

“Fuck you.” You spit, and the man’s brows lift, lips pulled into an amused smile as he wipes his cheek.

“Hard way it is.”

Instantaneously, you’re hauled over his shoulder, not straining a bit despite the incessant kicking and pounding of your fists against his shoulder.

And just to prove how much he wholeheartedly deserved that fuck you, he made sure to lock the vehicle twice right in front of your face, receiving an equally as distasteful glare through the windshield in return.

The car ride was quiet, only interrupted by him asking if the air was too cold which you responded to with the middle finger. Jisung giggled.

Wee hours of morning peer through thick clouds, the road briefly illuminated by your headlights, corn stalks for miles lining either side. A barely palpable trace of life noticeable in a church’s steeple in the distance—once stark white, now stained and evidently aged.

Looking in the mirror, you locate the other vehicle tailing, assumed to be carrying the additional boys. Considering where your lone source of communication may be hidden (a.k.a your phone), you strain trying to spot it in your peripheral.

No use. Just you and this shit-hole of a situation.

Either way, what would you even say? “Please help me I’ve been kidnapped by eight of Korea’s most wanted criminals”? Yeah, they’ll definitely believe that.

There’s a hum from the prince-like man.

“This is the perfect place for a murder,” He speaks so nonchalantly, as if he referred to the weather and not killing someone.

Chills spread along your arms.

Jisung chuckles. “You’re right, no traces at all. Either way, even if someone did find them they’d likely already be rotten.”

You’re nauseous.

“Say, do you know how long it takes for a body to rot out here?” He asks, and your dizziness keeps you from realizing he’s referring to you, stomach threatening to spill all of its contents any second now.

And they expect you to know that?

Your silence leads to Jisung earning a smack from his backseat companion, scolding him hushedly.

Bahng stays quiet, one hand holding the wheel and the other splayed on the center console. Occasionally though you’ll see his eyes flit elsewhere, or maybe it’s your imagination.

Car eventually falling mute with a few passengers sleeping, you get close to doing the same before the harsh jerk of the car stirs everyone wide awake, clutching onto their seats.

You’d swerved into a small expanse of corn, wheels crushing the crops beneath them. Instantly the three reach under their seats, instinctively grabbing out pistols and pushing open the doors slowly, bodies crouched low.

Preparing to hide to the best of your ability, a hand on your arm keeps your movement at bay, discovered to belong to Bahng.

“Just keep in mind what Jisung said, by the time anyone finds you you’ll be rotted, pretty thing.” He sends you a sickeningly sweet smile, cocking the hammer of his gun and disappearing out the door where you hear someone shout: “I fucking knew we were being followed!” Prior to the loud ricochet of bullets being fired.

You duck down in the passenger seat, attempting to be as small and forgettable as possible out of sight. That is until a gunshot strikes the side of the car, narrowly bypassing where you’re curled up on the floorboard.

An involuntary scream escapes you, and your palm clamps over your mouth, shuddering and shaking like a leaf.

It’s a natural reaction, shrinking away, too horrified to act. So when your door is violently swung open, you prepare for the worst before recognizing Bin’s face, who legitimately rips you from the seat and drags you away.

Stopping beside a minimal clearing, you observe he isn’t carrying a weapon of any kind, a factor that makes your hopes slightly plummet. Granted, it’s not that you don’t think he’d be capable of defending himself (and you), but his fists against a gun didn’t sound too promising.

Swiftly instructed to not move, he races off, effectively tackling a man to the ground and leaving a pool of blood seeping where he lay.

Except, Bin abruptly evades your vision, leaving you to notice the prince-like boy in his stead, waving his arms and yelling something you strain to recognize.

“Behind you!” He had been shouting.

Your soul fills with dread.

In an instant you brace for impact, ears picking up the whirring of an object against the wind before the crack of a bat makes contact with your attackers head. The man goes down like a sack of bricks.

Bin, holding a nail embedded baseball bat propped on his shoulder, appeared just on time.

He had a streak of blood smeared across his cheek which you guessed belonged to someone else, and his knuckles lay bruised and torn despite the massive shit-eating grin slapped on his face.

“You alright, sweetheart?” He asks, voice hoarse and rough despite never looking more alive. It’s terrifying.

Shaken, you give yourself a once over, hurriedly shaking your head. He barks a laugh.

Gunshots eventually dying off, the nine of you regroup, some suffering minor injuries and others standing untouched.

Among them, the dagger-wielding criminal is one of the untouched. You’re not surprised.

Jisung is cussing wildly, leg ripped up pretty bad while leant against said dagger-wielding criminal, sending his counterpart a sour glare.

“Those motherfuckin’ assholes need ‘ta learn some fuckin’ manners..” Jisung spews curses, lips pulled up in a sneer as the others help him into the bullet-embedded car.

Reversing out of the densely packed foliage, no one dares say a word the entire rest of the drive, preoccupied with going back to their interrupted sleep or blankly gazing into the night.

The destination, appearing to be a company building by its exterior (and the lack of daylight), easily averages the size of an extreme warehouse. You curve into an enormous parking garage, every other space occupied by some multimillion dollar sports car.

Upon walking inside though, you’re left in the main entrance with Jisung while the remainder slip into a separate room.

His leg is bandaged thanks to “Jeongin”, whom, after briefly seeing them in brighter lighting, you guess is the youngest-looking one. Light hair and a smile you’re certain breaks all law-breaking guidelines.

Arrangement of chairs mimicking that of a doctor’s office, you guess the decorum is used to disguise what actually goes on here.

Clearing your throat, you debate on speaking about the question burning a hole through your skull.

“Why do you want me to live?”

Managing to haul himself backwards on a chair, Jisung shrugs.

“Why not? It’d be fun having someone other than those boneheads around.”

Typical Jisung reaction, you assume. This is the same dude bringing up murder like it’s a daily occurrence after all.

“Plus, we’re normally workin’ solo. Some circumstances forced us to work together.” He absentmindedly waved, and you bite the urge to ask about these so-called “circumstances”.

With Jisung, you can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic or serious. You have a feeling asking him about it though would only lead to a response along the lines of: “Hey, it adds to the fun, right?” as if murder was a leisurely hobby.

You can’t help but feel baffled with how casually he talks about the additional men. Friends, as if they’re friends. Not like they would be, Jisung said it himself, “circumstances” pulled them together.

However, the danger they’d pose working as a team would be unreal. You didn’t even want to consider the possibility.

Goosebumps crawl upon your forearms.

"Y’know, I used to protect people like you." Han Jisung, whom you now recognized as The Arsonist, tilted his head to the side when he said that.

Strikingly beautiful, just like the others. Soft, round cheeks. Dark, soulful eyes and pursed, puffy lips.

You recall your grandmother telling you some of the prettiest flowers carry the most poison. Now it makes sense.

Blinking, you choose your words rather carefully.

This man, the one who upon first glance looks like he couldn’t harm a fly, burned down a printing firm yesterday. The same man alongside seven other notorious criminals discussing your fate.

Korea’s most wanted.

“Why’d you stop? Protecting people, I mean.” Coming out mumbled, you watch him click his tongue and change posture, not phased whatsoever.

It was a genuine question, considering whatever job he had before —if it came down to protecting— seemed to be something linked to the law. Unusual, for a criminal or his level.

“I got bored,” He yawned, lower lip jutting out.

Talk about a juxtaposition to his psychotic tendencies.

Bored. Han Jisung, The Arsonist, got bored of being a good guy.

It gave you a whole new perspective to insane.

“..You ask a bunch of questions, huh. I guess that makes sense since you might die- no! Not die- well, I’m not sure but- you’ll be fine!”

Wow Jisung. You seriously suck at convincing.

Oh how you wish your grandma would appear with her shovel right about now. Scratch that, you wish she would’ve swatted them over the head much earlier than now.

“Alright, but where will we keep her while Bahng decides on the cover up?” The seven go quiet, and if it wasn’t for the whirring of a fan overhead you would’ve guessed they were telepathically communicating, few sparing hasty glances at each other, waiting for someone to speak up.

Changbin was the one who asked, but he didn’t continue, nor even meet Bahng’s eyes despite his normal, boisterous behavior.

If there was one person they all had a running respect (and fear) of, it would be Bahng. He’d brought up the idea of working together, and he’d be the one leading in result.

Freckle Boy (the name The Hitman had came up with before learning Felix’s’ name) opens his mouth.

“I can—“

“She’ll stay with me.” Bahng interjects, and no one lifts a finger.

Changbin sees the blond’s pinched expression through his peripheral.

“But I have an extra—“

“You heard me, Felix. She stays with me,” He sternly repeats, and the younger deflates, mumbling something to himself after Hyunjin sends him a reassuring nod.

The atmosphere eased up slightly opposed to how suffocating it had been earlier, enough to where the men occupying their individual chairs took deep breaths of air they hadn’t know they’d been holding.

The door opens and they disperse in different directions while Bahng lags behind, speaking to Jeongin about something hushed.

You, on the other hand, are greeted with a rather sympathetic smile from the blond, telling you whatever they talked about wasn’t good.

From your right, Bin clears his throat, effectively giving you an unprecedented heart-attack.

“For the record, we weren’t planning to sell you.”

A grin grows on your face, taking this sweeter opportunity to pick some fun. You’re stuck here anyway, right?

“We weren’t? I think you were.”

He huffs, crossing muscular arms over his chest stubbornly. Behind him, a neighboring coffee-haired man snickers, earning Bin’s slap on the shoulder and a quiet “Yah.. Seungmin..” That completely sabotage any chance of taking him seriously.

“..I wasn’t.”

Mhm, definitely. Like the tips of his ears weren’t blood red.

The whiplash you’re getting from being treated you like a rag doll earlier becomes quite ironic.

Wasting time incessantly teasing the man, it’s not until he’s lead off by Bahng that you quiet down, awkwardly shifting your weight to either heel.

“..So?” You interrupt the silence, only given a jerk of Bahng’s head as a signal to follow. Talk about vague.

Overflowing with endless questions, he finally stops and turns to you, brows furrowed.

Attractive. My god he’s attractive.

“Would you just tell me where we’re-“You’re staying in my room for the time being.”

To say you felt shocked barely brushed the surface of your internal wasp nest, endlessly buzzing and swarming. His room? What the hell was that supposed to mean?

“I mean,” He notes, looking amused now. “Unless you plan on staying in the other rooms with cameras and giving security a show then—“

“Fine.”

Sending you a smug grin, it’s hard not feeling bewildered as he rounds a corner, revealing one, the fact that he has literal guards standing on either side of the double doors, and two, that his “room” is the short story of a penthouse.

Wow.

.. .

Turning off the ignition, Changbin stuffs the keys in his pocket upon slipping inside, scrunching his nose at the sight before him.

“Fuck dude, you’re a tank.” The man groans, eyeing Chris who’s currently doing handstand push-ups on wooden parallettes.

When Chris is nowhere to be found, he’s here, hidden away in this partially abandoned gymnastics studio on the outskirts of Incheon. Small, though with all materials intact.

Occasionally teenagers would come roaming around, having heard of hauntings and gruesome murders they want to stick their noses in. It’s plausible, sure, the murder part at least.

Changbin didn’t believe in hauntings, because no horrific spirit ever dared deter him from enjoying his job, over and over. He didn’t have remorse, he didn’t feel.

Life was easier that way, without emotion driving your decisions.

In fact, he can’t recall the last time being a hitman scared him. Call it crazy, but if you think about it in terms of “eliminating those that shouldn’t be there”, he’s doing the world a favor.

He wouldn’t tell Bahng that for many reasons.

“And your mouth is still as bad as usual.” The older says through gritted teeth, slowly lowering his legs, coated in a sheen of sweat that greasily muss strands of hair.

He barks a laugh. “‘Can’t fix it.”

“That’s for sure,” Chris responds, grabbing the towel The Hitman held out with a thankful pat on the back.

Arranging the equipment back into its designated places, Changbin leans against the doorframe, brows lifted curiously.

“She’s sleeping, if you’re wondering.”

Telepathically, the man answers his unspoken question, referring to you who he imagines is prettily slumped in Chris’ bed.

Prettily. Did he say prettily?

Forget it.

Unknown to both your name and whereabouts, you begrudgingly pull the comforter closer over your head, successfully blocking the sunlight for a few more minutes of sleep. Your entire body is sore, and a numbing buzz has settled in your head, drowning out any cognitive ability to think.

Well, the extra time is amazing until your bladder decides to sabotage you.

Blindly blundering off the mattress, you idly navigate around, blinking a foggy haze from your vision.

Step, step, and then thump! You slam right into something—someone.

Finally granted a clear view, you swear your brain short-circuited.

It’s Bahng, staring down at you with a towel wrapped around his neck while water droplets cling to his skin—to his chest—that you notice is quite bare at the moment.

“Christ— Jesus—“ Slapping a hand over your eyes, you take multiple strides backwards, feet stumbling prior to hands grasping your wrists.

Easing you up right, he kindly leads your sleep-consumed form into the bathroom, big hands momentarily maneuvering your hips to the side on his way out.

Effectively stalling his movements, you silently drag him back closer to you, thumbs reaching up to smoothing his deep eye-bags.

He freezes, words he planned to say cut off.

His eyelids flutter shut in contentment, and in those tender seconds, you stand there, palms delicately cupping his cheeks, relaxing the hard lines of his face whilst steam gives the mirror a bleary cast.

Any other situation and you would’ve admitted yourself into a psych ward, but the alarm clock on his nightstand reading 7:18AM told you whatever you did next was all a lucid dream.

“You don’t sleep much.. do you?” Softly mumbling, he hums against your touch, own hand holding yours against his face.

Bahng cracks a barely there smile.

“Hard sleeping when the world’s after you,” He comments, remark laced with humorless hilarity. You can’t say you disagree.

Although, most good things—all good things—end far too quickly. Because when Changbin bursts through the door, voice choked in his throat, you hesitate your movements.

“.. Just uh, wanted to say the car’s waiting- I mean, the car’s ready for you. Yeah. Bye.” Awkwardly shuffling, he made a direct beeline for the door.

Never in your life did you expect a Hitman to be so awkward. And not just a Hitman, thee Hitman, Bin. Who, although you’d never say it to his face, definitely stuttered.

Unfortunately forced to separate, you’re handed one of his jackets once you managed to convince Bahng to let you come along.

Taking the elevator to the parking garage, an assistant who (you assume) routinely fetches the keys to an otherworldly expensive Lamborghini bows low, greeting either of you with a mandatory please-don’t-hurt-me smile.

You don’t ask where you’re headed, knowing the answer would only lead to more questions instead.

Bahng’s like that, you’ve discovered. Unpredictable to everyone but himself. Private.

Alternatively, compared to what you had imagined (something like a shed or a slaughter-house), he pulled into the gravel driveway of an old home, wooden docks on the roof sticking in strange directions, evidently battered from years of storm turmoil.

Sporting a confused expression yourself, he steps from the scissor doors, ushering you to follow suit.

A bit out of place, you decided. It’s not every day you witness a Lamborghini parked in front of a house like this.

“We’re visiting my grandmother, I visit every week.” He announces, and you could’ve seriously bet money on how uncharacteristic that move was.

This man, the man who ran disappeared at ungodly hours of night with unknown intentions, the man who killed with no remorse, was visiting his grandmother.

First Bin and now Bahng. What a wild card.

Living up to the title, Bahng couldn’t have been more opposing to his usual demeanor, shrugging off his coat and shoes at the doorway and fixing Barley tea for the short woman residing in her rocking chair.

Struggling to unzip his jacket that’s massive size engulfs your frame, you curiously explore, noting the sheer normality.

No weapons, no apparent knowledge of Bahng’s illegal activity patterning the household.

In this house, it’s just a grandmother and her grandson. Not Bahng, but Chris.

The name sounds strange on your tongue.

She wholeheartedly welcomed you in, scolding him for his prominent scars and holding hands that had unforgivable violence wedged between fingernails.

Somehow, watching him felt like betrayal. And although you doubt his grandmother would love him any less despite the gruesome reality, to know so much occurred behind the scenes made things, well, uncomfortable.

You be sure to introduce yourself, spending a good hour and a half entertaining the wrinkled woman before bidding your farewells and returning to familiar stifling tension on the drive home.

Your piling conscious suggests you say something, but you second guess yourself, ultimately garnering the courage after many failed attempts of making small talk once you both returned back to his room.

He’s wearing glasses now, and you swear you’ve never seen someone so unbearably beautiful in your life. Hell, him merely breathing has any comprehensible phrase disappearing instantaneously.

“Have you told anyone about what you do?” You start, causing him to lean over from his place on the side of the mattress, fiddling with something on the nightstand.

You crane to hear his response.

“Sometimes it’s best to lie to keep both parties happy.”

…That’s a no.

“Then, Chris, would you rather be happy living a lie or sad knowing someone’s honest truth?”

Chris.

Though his real name, the words still sound foreign, especially aloud.

He seems to have felt the same, head snapping your direction.

Grinning.

“And what do you know about lying, sweetness?”

“It’s not what I know, it’s what you want to know.” You scoot closer to him, mimicking his cocky smile. “Here’s an example, would you be happy not knowing I’ve wanted to kiss you for a long time, or sad hearing that I didn’t plan to tell you?”

A low chuckle.

“Did you learn the manipulation part from Minho?”

“Is it working?”

Eyes flickering back and forth from his lips to his eyes, you find yourself lingering centimeters apart, both intoxicated on each bated breath.

“A little bit,” He whispers, unwavering stare flickering to your parted lips before he pulls the glasses off his face and tilts his head to capture your lips.

You hastily climb onto the bed, fingers tangled in his tousled curls that peer from straight hair.

New, but not. As if you’ve kissed him all your life.

Working down your neck, his warm grip eases your legs apart, transitioning from kneading the flesh of your inner thighs to your ass.

“Oh— fuck.” You sigh out, delicious pressure applied right where you needed him most, stirring a deep wave of pleasure radiating throughout your entire body.

The Gunsman has you wrapped around his finger. A man whose power owns guards that stand in front of his seemingly normal door, a man whose power leaves you helplessly entangled in his every move, neck accessorized in his love bites.

Its wrong. Everything is hopelessly wrong.

You can’t get enough.

.. .

Index dragging across the fabric of sheets, your attention bursts alive, body jarring in a hold, someone else’s hold.

Bahng’s hold.

His head is tucked into your neck, arms hugging your bare back against his equally bare body. Bahng feels like comfort, home.

You never thought you’d be referring to a criminal when you said that.

Adjusting, you manage to roll over, admiring his ever kissable lips puckered in a pout, bed-hair forming strange shapes in the side of his pillow before mesmerizing brown eyes begin fluttering open.

Quickly rolling back around, you attempt at pretending to be asleep to no avail, because Bahng buries his face closer to the nape of your neck, sighing a lengthy groan.

Hands exploring you absentmindedly, he ensures to squeeze your chest at least once, otherwise keeping a tender touch settled on your tummy.

“G’morning…” He grumbles hoarsely, barely awake prior to his phone buzzing on the nightstand and his hushed “fuck” earning a giggle from you.

Caller ID: Hwang Hyunjin, the screen reads.

Without even a proper warning, he’s simultaneously thrown into a shark tank the moment the call’s accepted.

So long for the morning afterglow.

“It’s ready,” The Physic utters, and the soft fizzing of chemicals in the background do nothing to cease his foaming pit of guilt.

Grateful you couldn’t see the tight-lipped expression he burns the wall with, he grimaces, sparing you a longing glance.

So peaceful, so beautiful.

This world truly is cruel.

Rising to his feet, he throws on a white button-up, adorned by one of the many black trench coats lining his closet. Discreet, convenient.

Reminding you to stay in bed till he gets back, he finds his footsteps faltering on the way down to the lab.

Bahng, Christopher Bahng, The Gunsman, is nervous.

You’ve really done something to him.

Although, before he can make a move Felix pries the door ajar, and from how he furiously chews his bottom lip immediately answers Chris’ question.

The final part of their cover-up? Getting you back.

Because everyone, including himself, knew he’d fall in love. And he couldn’t. He couldn’t, wouldn’t dare put you through that.

Wafting fumes invade his nostrils entering (essentially) Hyunjin’s lair, multiple cloths layered in a clear box.

“Chloroform, I messed with it a bit. It’s not concentrated enough to be lethal. It’ll just put her out for a little bit.” He pats the top of the box, tugging medical gloves off ringed fingers.

From across the room, Chris can feel eyes on him.

“And how do you know if it won’t kill her?” The person asks, Changbin asks, critiquing gaze fixated on Chris despite regarding Hyunjin.

“Because I tested it? Since when did you care?” Moodily, The Physic cross his arms.

“Since now.”

“Why? Weren’t you the one who wanted to sell her?”

Chris can smell the uprising tension from a mile away.

“Because I’m allowed to care about someone! Am I not, your fucking highness?” Changbin shouts, but hidden by Hyunjin’s irked facade, Chris notices the slight tug of his lips, the peeking amusement.

Turns out Chris wasn’t the only one falling.

What a twist of events.

Interrupting their face-off, he hoists the moderately heavy box up, curtly nodding to Hyunjin.

Maneuvering around the warehouse back toward your room, he fastens a mask onto his face, spreading a few separate cloths into a smaller container.

Felix and Hyunjin’s doing, Chloroform cloths.

There were a few recommendations. Minho suggested knocking you out and going about, Seungmin with the grand idea of blackmailing you into leaving, and Jisung who wanted to keep you here.

Chloroform it was.

Returning to his bedroom, he finds himself understanding Changbin’s anger the longer he watches you, drifted back asleep, angel-like.

Fuck.

This hurts.

Sitting on the edge of the bed, he delicately caresses the skin of your cheek, squinting to marvel, to study. The way your eyebrows furrow, exhaling a big breath. Infatuating.

“Can I take you to my favorite place?” He inquires, and you dazedly roll around, small frown gracing oh so tempting lips, swollen from the night before.

“Your favorite place..?”

Even your voice is infatuating. Dreamy.

Chris hums his reply.

Lifting yourself up, you agree, letting him take care of you, brush your teeth for you, undress you. Things oddly mundane for a person like him to want to do, but oddly sweet all the same.

Not sexual, but intimate. Dearly, dearly intimate.

The drive winds along backroads, slowing to take a right down a barren, rocky road situated between countless trees. In the distance you make out the faint glow of light, a clearing.

Upon breaching the forest, your expectations are instantly blown away.

Sundown, evidence of how long you’d slept (and how long Chris had kept you up), gloriously paints the sky dazzling hues.

No picture could encompass this view.

Putting the car into park, you perch on the hood, legs aimlessly swinging, breeze idly passing by.

Admire.

“I asked Jisung, but now I wanna hear it from you.”

He stays quiet.

“Why did you want me to live?” You mischievously pique, fingers drumming.

Bahng approaches nearer, turning to stand between your legs where you sit.

“I like you,” He nonchalantly responds, and the overwhelming need to push him further, dance over that thin line becomes irresistible.

“Only ‘like’ me?”

Licking his lips, he unexpectedly tilts your head to meet him. Tender, gentle.

Your heart hurts. Because unlike previously, this kiss feels regretful, feels sad.

Your arms, once clutching onto that trademark trenchcoat, wrap around his neck, his finding purchase upon your hips.

Yet, you could tell it wasn’t greed driving him. Your earlier ravenous desire, your lust, was gone.

Instead, he was carving you into his memories, starting with his lips. He’d already done so with his hands, with his body the night before.

“I’m sorry,” He whispers, and before you could ask any questions he forces your attention back to his eyes, swimming with an emotion you didn’t know Chris could exhibit.

Hurt.

Inexplicable hurt overwhelm that stare. Creases his always-taut brows.

“Just trust me, please.”

Please.

“Chris,” You hesitate.

There’s been that gnawing sensation ever since getting roped into this circus. Because this was only temporary, undoubtedly headed to an inexplicable conclusion.

You wonder if perhaps this is your end, your end with Bahng, with Chris.

Someone you’ve fallen in love with. So, so fucking hard.

And from the way he’s looking at you, it looks like he has too.

But you trust him. You trust him more than you had ever trusted anyone before, and so you nod.

“Chris, I love..”

Your volume dissolves upon the cloth being held to your face, eyes rolling back into your head as you fall limp into his arms, fingertips still touching his skin.

“..Love ….you.”

He kisses you once more, slower this time, cradling you in his arms.

“I’m so sorry, I love you.”

Speaking softly to avoid his pain betraying him, Bahng carefully situates you into the passenger seat, ignoring the drone of the engine from how rapidly the speedometer climbs. Numb to anything, everything.

The Aventador’s screen alights with a call.

“What,” He rasps, gleaming traffic lights casting red and green shadows across the car’s black interior.

“Is she...?” Felix asks, and Chris eases slightly. Subtle shuffling in the background reveals the others presence, awaiting the bottom line.

“Yeah.”

The freckled boy hums in response, dejection apparent.

Nevertheless, not a peep sounds, unusual for the usually rowdy crowd. Chris can tell some of them walk away, some staying.

Corn stalks ghosting past signify his location.

He hangs up.

He’ll apologize later.

.. .

Waking up inside your grandparents house feels like a fever dream, like your body isn’t your own and when you open your eyes you’ll still be snuggled into Chris’s arms.

But you aren’t, and you’re also violently kicked out of that fantastical daydream when your grandmother shows up, all smiles, no “I’m so relieved to see you’re safe” or “where did you go?” apparent on any of her features.

“Why, you never told me you had a boyfriend!” She smacks your arm and you flinch back, wearing an expression only comprehensible as puzzlement.

Perhaps Chris payed them? Bought their silence and hid from the law in return?

But that’s not your grandparents. They wouldn’t keep their mouths shut about something like this.

So what the hell did he do?

“The handsome young man who drove you here from the airport!” Waddling over to point an accusing finger at the doorway, your head frantically snaps in every direction.

Your suitcases are zipped up, and no evidence of you ever even arriving here shows around the room.

That is until you notice your phone has miraculously returned on your nightstand.

Immediately swiping to scroll through messages, your thumb stops, lingering over a message from an unknown number.

Pausing, you click.

Don’t come looking for me, but if you need me, text this number.

You would’ve found the text eerily creepy if you didn’t have an idea of who sent it.

You do.

Because there’s no one else that says ‘don’t come looking for me’ and ‘if you need me’ in the same sentence other than him.

Bahng.

FIC TAGLIST. @lizzetmv @skzhoes @fylithia @sunshineshouyo @stayconnecteed @starlost-andfound @seo--changbin @lynlyndoll @browniesandsunshine @stay278 @surefornext @pororolifeblog @httpsjuno @d7n3

sunboki, may 2022 ©

[sharpth1ng]

when stu was dating tatum (because billy told him to) did he actually like/“love” her in a romantic way ?(ik love is a strong word) because in debaser/wom he talks about how he actually liked her and all of their friends and kinda how he misses(?) all of them.

is this like strictly platonic and sexual? do you think he liked her sexually(well because they fucked so that might be a stupid question😭) like obviously he loves billy and they have a deeper relationship than anyone with anything and if he did like anyone else it’s definitely not the same as him and billy’s relationship, but is he like billy in the way that he couldn’t have a “meaningful relationship” with someone other than billy?

SORRY FOR RAMBLING ITS LIKE 1:00 AND IM REREADING DEBASER

Stu is really complicated in terms of the way he values other people, but no, he didn't meaningfully love Tatum. If she had lived long enough to threaten his and Billy's plan then he wouldn't be remembering her in a nostalgic way.

Stu is different from Billy in that he's significantly more social, he craves social interaction, so while he doesn't really value people in a normal way he does want and enjoy having friends. I don't think he really considered what the effect of killing all of his friends would be, he was so high on Billy and the idea of being together after that he wasn't really prepared to lose a bunch of social stimulation all at once. In that way he does miss people like Tatum and Randy. They were fun to him, he enjoyed their presence in his life, but he also sees them as disposable in a way that Billy isn't.

I do think that Stu has the capacity for affection and attraction to more people than Billy is, he'd probably be (unethically) non-monogamous in a world where Billy doesn't exist. Realistically I think Stu has done a lot of cheating, like he'd be dating Casey and hooking up with some random other girl at a party when she's not there. The only person he's ever been emotionally faithful to is Billy, so in that way yeah, I don't think he could have a meaningful relationship with someone else, but I do think the relationships he would have would be a little more substantial, and could at least have the potential of being a bit healthier.

In contrast to Billy, I think Stu would have more of an ability to deepen relationships over time and there's people like Leslie he's attached to in a different way. I don't necessarily think that deepening happens a lot of the time though, because he often behaves in ways that make people less willing to let him get closer.

Stu's most well-adjusted non-Billy romantic future would be something like solo-poly where he wouldn't have any primary partners, but that's really hopeful lmao. Even if he got there eventually he would still spend a good chunk of his life just being a serial cheater. He'd be the kind of guy who just wouldn't really take you seriously when you find out he's cheating. He'd be like "Aw shit, sucks you feel that way but this situation is kinda harsh now so I'm gonna dip. No hard feelings!"

I think there's some chance of him meeting people who would have the patience to teach him that there are ways to have less exclusive relationships without being such an asshole about it. But realistically even the version of him sort of trying to do it right is mostly doing that because its annoying when people are always mad at you all the time, and he's still going to be a dick about things. Other people's emotions just don't affect him as much as Billy's do, so he's often pretty emotionally insensitive.

To get back to Tatum, Stu genuinely liked her personality, found it fun to hang out with her, and yeah, was sexually attracted to her. Sex isn't always romantic, some people can genuinely just enjoy having sex as a fun activity with friends. It's fun to do the feel-good activity with people you like and I think that's how it was for Stu, and Tatum as well to an extent. Because I think Tatum was also significantly more attached to Sidney than to Stu.

The thing is that there are parts of Stu that he just wouldn't know how to share with someone other than Billy, and part of the reason he can share them with Billy is because they grew up together. Stu's very aware that he has urges and thoughts that would get him put on an FBI watchlist, things that would alienate most of the people in his life if they knew.

Billy grew up developing the same urges with him. They've been escalating together for years, and if Billy wasn't around Stu likely would have been doing it on his own. If he did have someone else I think that relationship would be a lot more like the 'peer-pressure' relationship that some people think he and Billy had. It would have been someone Stu manipulated into killing with him, because Stu fundamentally doesn't want to be alone.

At the end of the day, the events of Debaser are a learning experience for Stu. No, he doesn't value Tatum the way he does Billy, he wasn't romantically attracted to her, but a non-Billy friendship is something that did bring value to his life.

In a cynical way I think women in his life have been willing to do emotional labor that men haven't because yk, toxic masculinity and gender roles. As a result I think he really does like having a close friendship with women like Tatum and Tammy, and he doesn't need the sexual aspect he had with Tatum for it to be worthwhile for him. While he would trade that friendship for Billy, he would much rather be allowed to have both.

Im also sorry for rambling 😭 but there you go

[sasarasfan]

Cant find any 6th anniversary questions so we’ll settle for redoing 5th anniversary!

Answers under the read more hehe

1. Uhmmm idk 2021 sometime,,, I don’t remember exactly. I got into it because of a post saying happy birthday ichiro and it was on my to watch list for a while before I caved in and watched the anime

2. The artstyle and the eyes of the characters I thought they were really pretty

3. I’m into MILGRAM which cough music project,,, but hypmic was the first one that put me through multimedia hell so thanks to hypmic for that

4. Doppo definitely. I loved him so much in the beginning. Now to a lesser degree, but I’m still obsessed with him. I did not really care about BB, but I liked Saburo. Now I really like Jiro!! And saburo!! I have personal beef with Ichiro. Same with MTC tbh. Samatoki was pretty so yeah. I liked FP and MTR originally, that hasn’t changed

5. Doppo or Gentarou thanks to the anime probably

6. Kuko and Ramuda. I did not really like Kuko, but then I became a changed man after watching multiple lives (I love his VA) uhmhmhmh I did not really like Ramuda in the beginning but now I think he is super silly and I cherish him dearly. On another note, I did not like DotsuHom in the beginning cause I don’t like change and DotsuHom was a division I didn’t know after I finished the anime. Well. Guess who loves DotsuHom now

7. Matenrou and Fling Posse

8. Well Sasara is my favourite character now, and Rosho is a very very close second I don’t even know what happened I was influenced by my twitter mutuals,,,, and then I still adore Doppo and Gentarou, and I have a feeling BAT are gonna start creeping up too

9. Whatever the first rhyme anima song was. Besides that, it might have been BATTLE BATTLE BATTLE

10. Dont stop the party, both Sasara solos, Positive is my life, Rinka (I LOVE Rinka), both jyushi solos, black or white, and hmm too many to name tbh

11. Ah osaka dreamin night, but I also love JACKPOT! And pretty much any DH song they’re all bangers. Uhmmmm every FP song too minus Stella (I have a vendetta against Stella). I also like TDD Legend but I don’t listen to it often

12. I JUST RECENTLY FINISHED TRACK 3 OF THE STAGE ITS OSAKA 24K GOLD OR WHATEVER ITS CALLED JTS SO SILLY I LVOE IT I also love crush your mic but I have to listen to the rest of the songs to give a better opinion on this

13. Still not sure what it means by bonus but I love Hella Awesome Banquet and Naniwa Paradise Sake. I also like HOT GAME and Murder in the House of Magic and idk if it was a bonus or just yeah but once upon a time in shibuya

14. Glory or dust? Division battle anthem? Summit of divisions? Idk they’re all good

15. White and black, JACKPOT!!, Osaka big up, hella awesome banquet, this means war, and GAY although most of these aren’t slept on (minus Jackpot grrr) I think people should listen to them more

16. Uhmmm a bunch of DH songs are my favourite so yeah, but a LOT of them are from Fling Posse, Matenrou, or BAT

17. Rapper hmmm maybe Dice or Doppo they have some good lines, and I think Dice is very,,, very good at what he does

18. Sorry I still don’t pay attention to composers Aha

19. No clue again

20. Black journey, anyways get on the floor, rivals! Jackpot, This means war, maybe Ah osaka dreamin night or Wara osaka, but I think FP is a great introduction to hypmic

21. I play ARB but I can’t get the friend code rn sorry :(

22. IM SO HAPPY FOR THE ROSASA SONG AND I LOVED THE DICEDO STUFF TOO!! I really liked the duets in the block party especially white and black so yeah all my dreams came true already though I do wish for a duet of Samatoki and Doppo.

23. I am the worlds number 1 Samado fanatic. I also love Sasaro, Gendice, Hifudo, fling poly, jirojyushi, poly MTC + doppo, and ichikuu. Any ship with doppo (minus the old or the young characters) are my favourite like I love samasasado and roshdo even though sasasama isn’t really my thing

24. No not really which is kinda surprising

25. Rosho and I would get along well. Hifumi (not host mode), and maybe Jyushi

26. Rosho is one of my highest kins actually. I won’t explain it cause I don’t want to like vent here

27. I HAVE FANARTIST KEYCHAINS!!!!! I HAVE SAMATOKI, ICHIRO, AND DICE!!! I also have ramuda keychain and cat Matenrou keychain too. I have a card of BAT. I have nothing from DH (im going to explode)

28. Mics with Hypmic branding please its not even that weird they just haven’t done it yet

29. Uhmmm I don’t really know with

30. Samado samado samado samado… and also rosasa of course!

31. RIO RIO HES SO CUTE RIO PLEASE MORE RIO LOVE and also I found that Rosho doesn’t get a lot of love either :(( which is really sad cause I love Rosho so much :((((

32. Sasara is just…. He’s so silly, but he’s also serious in a way that I just can’t describe. There’s not much to him or what we know about him actually, but I think he’s an interesting character. And I love Rosho cause he’s so me core (I kin him)

33. Sasara eats floor cookies (real) uhmmm and Doppo occasionally goes to Yokohama to spend time with Samatoki and they go on dates together (jm gojng to explode)

34. I like nemu she is so cute hehe

35. Dotsuitare Hompo because it has Sasara and Rosho in it. Their songs are so so so so so good too!! Their stageplay actors are all so silly :3

36. I don’t really have any for DH :(

37. Someone younger again!! Like I know it wont happen, but someone around Saburos age maybe? And someone who fits between the ages of 35 - 46 cause that’s a really large gap between Jakurai and Hitoya and Rei.

38. YEASSSS!! I FOLLOW A LOT OF THEM ON TWITTER DOT COM!!! And MTC VAs on Instagram

39. Haven’t really watched or heard sorry </3

40. My 12k rosasa fic that I’ve been working on since last year

41. I like the manga! But I think the stageplay is super good too

42. Rosasa break up and get together and fight in manga form, VD form, stageplay form, and anime form

43. Nope no theories

44. Please expand more on Sasara I am begging

45. I infodump about hypmic all the time to my friends I think they’re sick of me

46. DH DH DH DH DH DH DOTSUHOM FOR THE WIN RRRAHHHHH

47. Ichiro says “this truly was our Hypnosis Mic” the screen fades to black. THE END appears in white letters. It is the end of hypmic.

48. It’s the first community I was ever serious about and stuck with for over a year. I’ve met some great people through it and I’m truly happy that I got into it. It also acted like a gateway towards some of my other interests so yeah. It means a lot to me

49. SASARA NURUDE AND ALSO WE HAVE SO MUCH MEDIA LIKE THERES ALWAYS MORE STUFF TO CONSUME IFS KIDN OF INSANE

50. Hiiii future me!! I’ll probably see this in a year or so from now but hey!! I hope you’re doing well! I just got back into hypmic and yeah I’m reliving my greatest moments here. Take care of yourself hehe :3 ps I am the number 1 samado fan and the 10k word sasaro fic is still not finished sighs

Also also I love Rosho okay bye love you I hope you still love hypmic by the time you’re reading this again!!

[f1nalboys]

AHHHHH! HEY B! So, so, SO happy to see your requests are open again! I cannot believe you are gonna start writing for Buddy Swanson and Sam Wescott, it seems too fucking good to be true! I adore your stuff and adore those boys so this is gonna be an amazing combo holy shit.

Let's get into it. Poly!Camping boys! But let's get into some early poly shit with them, like the reader is a hinge, is seeing both, both are aware of each other but aren't involved with one and other yet, both sharing the reader solo. However, the two of them are just a bit jealous of the other. Both get into the bad habit of trying to outdo eachother physically. Sam eats you out so well you squirt and nearly pass out and Buddy get's wind of it? I guess that means Buddy is just gonna have to fuck you so good that you cry.

In short. Jealousy. Possessivness. Multiple Orgasms. Body Worship. Spoiling The Actual Fuck Outta The Reader. (Also fem reader if you don't mind I fucking love you thank you so much byeeeee)

Oh boy, Bex! This is a long one, like,,, really long, I just couldn't help myself!!! I loved this request so much, jealous Sam and Buddy makes my little heart pitter patter. I hope this lives up to all your expectations and more!!

WORD COUNT: 3027 (told yooooouuuuu)

WARNINGS: nsfw, fem!afab!reader, oral (amab and afab recieving), threesome, pre poly!camping boys, squirting, slight degradation and praise, jealousy, edging, sam gets taken care of <3, implication of more sex, not proofread and im sure theres more things im forgetting to add so my apologies

Sam knew what he had agreed to. You told him that there was another guy, one you had feelings for and one you weren’t willing to NOT be with. You told him that you liked him, really liked him, and that you didn’t want to put him in an uncomfortable situation with that, so if he wanted out that’s all he had to say. But he didn’t want out. Being with you was different then the others he had been with. So he figured that he could get over the lingering feelings of jealousy and anxiety and stick with it for you.

And then you had mentioned him. A passing comment, one he had asked for, but it still gave him a sense of…betrayal. He had asked how your day had been knowing you had seen him, some guy named Buddy, and you had answered. “Good. Y’know, he and I actually tried something earlier and god it felt good. Apparently he has a ‘natural talent’ for it. Think you’d be up for a little experimentation?”

Sam knew you didn’t mean anything by it, but hearing about how someone else made you feel good gave him his first real sense of jealousy. Now, Sam didn’t consider himself jealous or possessive in any way, but even he would admit that the sex that night had been different. He had been rougher with you, really taking his time on fucking you silly, and had made you cum five times before he even took his dick out. And when he finished, all he could think about was what that asshole’s face would look like when he heard about him.

And oh was Buddy’s face funny. The smile had faltered instantly and his lips thinned out the more you talked about Sam. It wasn’t until he grabbed you by the neck and pulled you in for a kiss that you realized just how annoyed he had gotten. That night was one of the most mind-blowing and exhausting nights the two of you had shared. Buddy was whispering filth in your ear the entire time, your back against his chest as he fucked you from behind, his finger circling your clit quickly. He wanted you to forget all about the other guy.

“Can he fuck you like this? Hm? Can he get you so fucking cock drunk you can’t think straight?” His voice is hot against your skin and he wasn’t going to let up any time soon, fucking you until you only knew his name, until your legs were weak and shaking from the sheer pleasure.

That’s when you realized what was happening. Everytime you brought up the other, the one you were with would get jealous and give you the best sex of your life as a way to one-up the other. It was a cycle, a beautiful, pleasurable, intense cycle that you never wanted to stop.

This went on for months. You’d spend the weekend with Buddy and when you went out with Sam you’d ‘casually’ bring up the fact you had squirted for the first time ever, or that Buddy had fucked you on his apartment balcony as the sunset, and Sam would have to find a way to go above and beyond that. And he always did.

Your favorite moment with Sam was after you had mentioned a kink Buddy had. Sam’s eyes darkened as you talked about the feeling of the saw blade pressed against your flesh as he fucked into you, how the thin scratches on your inner thighs were from the brittle blade, how you had cum so hard when he finally sank inside you and the saw dug into the flesh of your neck just enough to draw a few droplets of blood.

Sam was normally a slow and sensual lover, focused solely on your pleasure, on being submissive and letting you do whatever it was you wanted. After hearing that story and seeing the way you had begun to rub your thighs together at the mere mention of it, he knew he needed to change his tune. That night Sam tied you to the bed and fucked you for hours.

He ate you out until your words were slurred, only stopping to shove his cock down your throat roughly. Sam loved face fucking you on the rare occassions he got into it the mood for it. Feeling your throat constrict around him, the vibrations your gags and moans felt on his cock were delicious, and the feeling of control he had over you in that moment made it all the more better.

After he fucked you and filled you to the brim with his cum he untied you, massaging your wrists and ankles and peppering kisses along your skin. He drew you a bath and made you dinner, laid in bed with you with his arm around your waist. That morning you woke up to his head in between your legs, his tongue moving through your folds and his fingers pumping into you.

You brought the idea of a threesome up to Buddy first. He was giving you a much needed massage and the second you asked his fingers stopped gliding over your back. “What?” He didn't seem angry, more confused than anything. “You wanna show me a picture of the guy first?” Buddy was hoping to see a guy who was, all things considered, ugly, but that’s not what he got. Sam was hot. “Oh. Okay, I mean yeah, if you’re into it, we can.”

Sam was hesitant. When he saw a photo of Buddy he was hit by a wave of insecurity; Why would you be with him when you had Buddy? A long night of love making helped ease those worries, and soon enough the night of the threesome was upon you. You were at Buddy’s apartment waiting for Sam, your nerves only quelled by the glass of wine you had.

“Nervous or something, babe?” Buddy teased as though his stomach wasn’t in knots at the moment. There was a knock at the door before you could give him a snarky response and you jumped up from the couch and practically ran to the door.

“Sam! Come in,” You said with a smile as you opened the door. Sam gives you an anxious smile, stepping into the living room and looking around, trying hard to avoid Buddy's eyes. You wrap an arm around his waist and walk him over to the couch, giving Buddy a glare that has him standing up immediately. “Sam, this is Buddy Swanson. Buddy, this is Sam Wescott.”

They say hello to each other and the room falls quiet, awkwardness swirling around your head. “Can’t believe I finally get to meet the other man,” Buddy says in an attempt to lighten the mood and thankfully Sam laughs. The nervousness of all parties dissipates immediately as you all settle onto the couch, talking and letting the two of them get to know each other.

Your hand settles onto Sam’s thigh, your head resting against Buddy’s shoulder, and he gives you a quick smile before returning back to his conversation with Sam. They were getting along, at least, so that was something to celebrate. Sam stumbles over his words as your hand creeps higher up his thigh, ghosting over his clothed erection.

“Guess she wants to get to the main course, huh, Sam?” Buddy teases, wrapping his arms around you and moving his legs so you rest in between them. You hum in response, grinning at the blush spreading across Sam’s face and neck. Buddy's fingers dip under your shirt, his fingertips brushing over skin. “Not polite to keep a lady waiting, Sammy.”

The pet name is accompanied by an eyebrow raise and Sam shifts in his seat, brushing your hand off of his lap. Sam scoffs slightly before he leans in and kisses you, his hands dragging up and down your thighs. You sigh into the kiss, sandwiched in between the two hottest guys you’ve ever met in your life and it was perfect. “It sure isn’t, Bud.”

Sam can’t help but pull back and grin up at Buddy. You can feel the rumble of his laugh underneath you at the nickname and then Sam is back on you again, kissing you harder while Buddy litters kisses over your neck. He nips at your pulse and you moan into Sam’s lips, your hips grinding up subconsciously.

“Prettiest sound ever, dontcha agree?” Buddy asks Sam who hums, pulling away from you and unbuttoning your jeans. You lift your hips as he pulls them down, allowing him to remove them from you completely. Sam settles in between your legs, kissing down your still clothed chest down to your thighs, staring at you through his eyelashes as he licks a slow stripe up your slit. It was a good choice on your part to forgo underwear.

You whimper at the feeling of his tongue and both he and Buddy laugh at you. “Pretty sounds for a pretty girl,” Sam says with a wink and you can barely contain your groan at the lame joke. “But god, her pussy? The taste and smell and look of it, man, I can’t get enough of it. Could be here down all day,”

He delves into your cunt before you can say anything, pulling a particularly loud moan from you that has Buddy’s grip on your waist tightening. Something the two men could agree on was that the noises you made were fucking heavenly. Sam swirls his tongue around your clit, sucking and biting down on it gently. Flattening his tongue, he flicks it up and down your entire slit a few times before pushing the tip past your hole, his nose bumping against your clit.

Sam was a natural at eating pussy and Buddy couldn’t help but be impressed. “You like this, Y/N? Like getting your pussy eaten out while you got another guy watching?” He whispers into your ear, his hands traveling further up your shirt, pinching and tugging at your nipples as he nibbles at your earlobe. Your fingers tangle into Sam's hair and you pull roughly, shoving his face further into your cunt. Buddy laughs. “Oh, you really do. Kind of slutty, don’t you think?”

“You taste so fuckin’ sweet. You’re so beautiful,” Sam says, pulling away from you long enough to give you a smile before diving back in. The two go back and forth, your head filling with praise and degradation until it’s swimming.

“M’so close!” You cry out and Sam grips your thighs tightly, holding you in place as his tongue speeds up. You cum hard, your eyes screwed shut, Buddy’s assault on your chest never letting up. A gush of liquid comes out, covering Sam’s face completely and when he pulls back he has a large, cocky grin on his face.

He uses his middle finger and pushes it inside you slowly, pumping in and out at an almost unbearably slow pace. Your body, still coming down from it’s high, is still twitching every so often. “Did you know I was the first one to get her to squirt?” Sam questions, his eyes flicking from your blissed out face to Buddy's. Buddy nods slowly and you can feel his erection pressing against your back.

“Can the two of you fuck me already?” You ask earnestly, earning a laugh from the two men. You sit up, taking your shirt off and tossing it over to where your pants lay. Buddy and Sam both move off of the couch, tugging off their pants and shirts, leaving their boxers on for the time being. Buddy goes to touch you again but you back away and his eyebrows scrunch together in confusion.

“What’s wrong, hon?”

“Yeah, s’everything alright?” Sam asks, his voice dripping with worry.

You grin, sitting up and kissing the two men quickly. “I want you two to touch each other first.” There's a pause before they begin to talk over each other, questioning you in a panic. “Oh my god, zip it, please!” You huff and they fall silent. Buddy had been with men before, plenty of them actually, but he didn’t know Sam. And Sam, on the other hand, hadn’t. A couple one night stands but he was not as experienced with this sort of thing as Buddy was and you could tell he was nervous.

You grab ahold of Sam’s hand and pull him to sit down on the couch beside you. “Sam, baby, don’t worry, alright? Buddy and I got you.” You look over at Buddy who flashes you a look of understanding before settling down on his other side. Sam nods slowly, swallowing hard, and Buddy slowly places his hand on his bare thigh. “Gonna make you feel good, aren’t we baby?”

“Sure are. Can I kiss you, Sam?” Buddy asks gently. He didn’t want to go too fast, didn’t want to make the other man uncomfortable, especially because he was beginning to really like him. He liked how he worked with him on making you feel good, how he was funny and able to crack a joke in between eating you out. Liked how cute he was, how soft he was around the edges and how he looked like he was just begging to be broken in.

Sam surprises the both of you by leaning in first, capturing Buddy’s lips quickly. His heart was racing and Buddy can feel it the second he puts his hand on Sam’s chest. He was toned more than Buddy had expected, his skin tan and freckled from his time at camp. Buddy swipes his tongue over Sam’s bottom lip, taking it slow, but Sam opens his mouth eagerly.

The longer he kissed him, the more Sam wanted him. Buddy can taste you on Sam’s lips and he deepens it, pulling a small whimper from the other man and Buddy wants to hear more. His hand falls from Sam’s chest down to his crotch, chuckling at the gasp Sam lets out as Buddy fishes his cock out.

“This alright?”

“Y-yes, fuck. More than alright,” Sam says breathlessly, his head falling back as Buddy begins to stroke him. He opens his eyes slightly, head tilting towards you and nearly cumming at the sight. You were leaned back against the arm of the couch, hand in between your spread legs, soft gasps and moans leaving your lips as you watched them. “God, your hand…”

Buddy sinks to his knees in front of Sam and slowly licks over his slit. Sam moans loudly, hands gripping the couch cushions tightly as Buddy takes his tip into his mouth. It was warm and wet and Buddy was using his tongue in a way that had Sam seeing stars. “Wa-wait, stop.” Buddy stops immediately, pulling away and looking up at Sam with worry. Even you had paused your movements, fingers inside yourself to the third knuckle. “I don’t wanna cum yet and if you kept that up I would’ve.”

“Damn, I’m that good at sucking cock?” Buddy says with a light tone and Sam blushes, rolling his eyes. “Hear that, Y/N! You got competition.”

“Oh my god, you’re so lame. You guys ready to go into the bedroom?”

Sam and Buddy stand, peeling their underwear off and grabbing ahold of you, trapping you in between them as they walk you to the bedroom. Kisses and wandering hands, you get to the bed breathlessly. “Wanna touch you, too,” Sam gasps into Buddy’s ear, sending a shiver down his spine. He sounded so needy.

“Go ahead, then. Show me what you got.” Buddy says, sitting down onto the bed. You sit behind him, kissing at his neck and running your hands up and down his chest as Sam settles in between his legs. Buddy watches with arousal as Sam spits into his palm before tentatively wrapping his hand around his cock. His strokes are slow and deliberate and he watches Buddy’s reactions, repeating the motions that have him grunting under his breath and flexing his hips.

You nip at Buddy’s pulse. “You like him jerking you off in front of me?” You ask teasingly and Buddy’s face gets red as he nods. This helped fuel his voyeurism kink to its fullest extent. “Take him in your mouth, Sam. I wanna watch you suck him off while he eats me out.”

Sam smiles as you push Buddy back onto his back, swinging your leg over his head and sitting on his face. Your hands go to your chest as Buddy begins to tongue fuck you, his hands coming to grip your hips to hold you in place. His hips buck up and he groans loudly, muffled only by your cunt, as Sam takes him into his mouth. He repeats what Buddy had done to him earlier, swirling his tongue around the tip and flattening his tongue on the underside of his shaft.

For the next few minutes you do this, Sam sucking and gagging on Buddy’s cock while you grind down onto his tongue, chasing your own high. “So close, Buddy. Please don’t stop, fuck!” You whimper and Buddy’s tongue speeds up, bringing you to your release. You tug on his hair as you cum, crying out his name. It’s only when your body stops jolting with each flick of his tongue that you swing off of him.

“Sam, stop, m’close. Wanna cum in you.” Buddy says with a moan and Sam comes off of him immediately. His face was flushed, spit and the remnants of your squirt on the lower half of him. “If that’s alright, of course.”

“Yeah. Yeah, it is.”

The two of them smile at each other and you let out a small ‘awwww.’ “My two guys are getting along!” Buddy groans and tickles you, Sam joining in and holding you still as Buddy’s fingers attack your sides. “Alright, alright, I’m sorry!” They stop and for a second the three of you stay there and relish the silence. It was comfortable. “Alright. How about we actually fuck now?”

With a smile Sam leans in and kisses you. “Let’s do it.”

[washymylifeaway]

Rare Pair MasterList (WIP)

All the rare pair fics (including poly) I’ve recommended up to 02/13/2022! To count how many there are, control f “//“ (without the “ ofc, but with a space at the end) and it’ll tell you :) (from my count, there should be around 18 but that doesn’t account for each individual fic in a series!)

(OiKuro) burning bright by kittebasu (chanyeol) (M) 43.9k // okay @granddecoffee is a real one and recommended this, and IT WAS SO GOOD OMFG. The world building was AMAZING and I got super immersed into the story really quickly. The writer explains things incredibly well and it’s not too hard to catch on! I loved the magical concepts within the fic as well, and the IwaOi friendship is SO good and the ushiwaka rivalry is still strong. I loved their dynamics and the backstories were developed REALLY intricately. I really enjoyed reading it, so that’s why I’m making a solo post about it LOL. There’s SMUT in it and some mentions of trauma so be careful reading it and make sure to check the tags!

(KomoSuna) I wish to live in a world by hatsuna (T) 24.8k // ok ngl this fic was so sad and relatable? Like I was like wtf why are you making me cry rn even though like I shouldn’t be? My heart? Pain. (Hotel? Trivago.) Technically, this is END GAME but the main pairing is kinda SakuAtsu???? Something of the sort, but also their relationship (Komori and Sakusa) is written so well and idk guys I think you need to read this fic rn.

(BokuAkaKuroo) The Sky and Guilt Are the Only Feelings I Have Left by oopsthisisqueertoo (NR) 267.7k // ngl I picked it up as a rec from someone else after misreading that it was THIS long haha. But like I kept reading, and the suspense omg. It HAS a happy ending, so if you’re reading it and you start to feel empty, push through (tho take breaks) and finish because it DOES end HAPPY. (PLEASE READ THE TAGS, THERE ARE SENSITIVE TOPICS!!!!)

(Osamu) the dog days are over by grandecoffee (T) 4.1k // i’m gonna start this off with PAINSDFNJKSDNKFJ. The part before (and while) Osamu is on the train killed me BYE, I was like STOP IT MY HEART (*SOBS LOUDLY*). I was also in public while I was reading this so I was trying to control my facial expressions but it was impossible LOL. ALSO like the ending OH MY GOD i was aboutta risk it all for mr.regular IM TELLING YOU RIGHT NOWLDKRK

(WashiSuna) STAND/STILL by viverella (T) 15.2k // first, as someone who’s tumblr url has things to do with washi tape, the ship name for this makes me giggly and happy AHHAHAHAH. Second, UAFHSJF I have never read any fics with Washio as one of the ship parings, BUT BRO. THIS? Life changing. Oh my god. The characterization of Washio was just *chef’s kiss* AND the dynamic between him and Suna was so CUTE. It was SOOO GOOD, so good as in I skipped class to finish it good. As in, I would do it again good. I would not recommend being a bad student like me, but I am recommending this fic HAHAH. It has caused me to spiral into Washio ship fic hell, but I have no regrets.

(SemiShira) everything is blue by hatsuna (T) 3.8k // HELLO THIS WAS SO GOOD. After I read it, I actually felt like I got punched like in the guts also didn’t help that during the read I felt my guts twisting LMFASFLK. That sounds so bad but it’s because the writing was just SO SO good and it made me feel a lot LOL. The feeling of loss is just so evident mixed with the fact that it was a non linear plot was def a one two punch for me LMFAO but I just love so much about this fic please read it.

(KomoSuna) let the light in on the front porch by rosevtea (G) 3.6k // HELLLLLO? I LOVE THIS ONE??? I love love love Komori POV fics and also this rare pair so much AHHHH. I loved Kormoi’s characterization SOOO much and I loved his perception of the team and just how observant he was. Just the little things that he did in this fic I HAD ME CRYING (LIKE HIM SMILING AT THE CORNER).

(KuroAka) wish upon a falling star by Authoress (T) 2.7k // THIS WAS SO FUNNY. Also I love Akaashi so much in this HAHAH and his realization at the ending was priceless LMFAO. It’s almost canon that Kuroo would fall off a roof because I mean,,, it’s Kuroo….

(EnnoFuta) 101 Uses for Cornstarch (Culinary or Otherwise) by parenthetic (renaissance) (T) 2.6k // HI THIS IS SO FUNNY AND CUTE. Also the pick up lines were killing me, I was laughing so hard but yeah. I was not expecting the way they ended up meeting but also I love Kinoshita and Narita HAHA.

(Washio) With Love, Washio by pancake_surprise (G) 1.8k // THIS WAS SO FUNNY I COULDNT BREATHE. I was reading and it just kept on going I felt so bad for this poor man. Also the sheer number of back ups for the letter and the part where he’s like ‘when suna and komori are together, there’s always a will’. Also the playlist I CANNOT. I LOVE THIS FIC IT WAS SO FUN.

(TsukkiHina) He’s Collecting Bugs on His Body; by tmntransformer (T) 15.8k // tbh if you squint, there’s a whole bunch of rare pairs in this LOL. But the main thing from this fic is DENIAL. LOL. Also bugs LOL.

(OiYama) Beans Are Spilled by rubysilk98 (G) 24.7k // bro am I trying to tear TsukkiYama apart? No LOL, but it feels like it. It’s the getting together fic of Oikawa and Yamaguchi and the title is very fitting. Also consent is important >:(

(OiSuga) How (Not) To Share A Bathroom by renaissance (T) 9.8k // passive aggressive sticky notes,,,, but it’s really cute and made me go akjfdjksa at the end. Also, their friends are a holes to them LOL. I mean give them some pity right?

(OsaAka) MAKE A RUIN OF ME by rosegoldwriting (M) 2.4k // i read this while making the rare pair list, and it was entertaining from start to finish! There’s some suna + kuroo action going on in the background too, but it’s just sneaky Akaashi for the most part!

(OsaAka) miya osamu’s guide to bad neighbors, serial break-ups, and domesticity by rosegoldwriting (T) 3.1k // PLEASE THE WAY I DIED READING THIS,,,, domestic and lovey but also funny asf. Like no, I kept laughing about this fic even after I finished because I just kept thinking about it,,,,,

(KuroAka) Thin Sand by shiro_yuu (T) 20.2k // is that their ship name? idk but you know, I love medical AUs and angst. So combination with some amnesia sprinkled on top :’) This one is for you rare pair lovers :D

(BokuAkaKuroTsukki) Turning Heads by ahhelga for Smokey310 (T) 2.8k // uh the only thing I have to say is the secondhand embarrassment was uh intense LMFAO,,,,, no like I had to stop like three times cause I started dying a little on the inside,,,,,

(ShinSakuAtsu) lined with kohl by entrechat (series) 13k // um Suna + eyeliner. That’s the series. I got nothing else to say other than read it and there’s a poly in here :D

[luntica]

I was telling my partner earlier that I figured out why marvel self inserts didn't have the same feel as dc.

It's not cause I like one over the other. I really like both.

But in marvel your either born with special powers, go threw an accident that gives you those powers, or get experimented on.

Otherwise your life is the same as it would be here.

Hawkeye deals with lots of shit. Both of them. And their prowess is the closest you get to earned power. But even then their lives suck. Like majorly. And short of the mythical shit and super hero what nots, their lives would be the same here. Used by the government for their skill but neglected in any care.

Tony stark had billions of dollars from inheritance, as well as his intelligence from alien heritage in one story at least.

The mutants all are genetic. Magic is inheritance or going to far off places hoping someone will take you in to teach you, if your worthy. Which sounds like fancy way of saying generic potential. In humans are off brand mutants, but aliens this time.

Banner, captain America, superman, and so many others are results of experiments. Usually traumatic.

Like I can't in the marvel universe go stand up for the right thing and be promised to be saved. (Debated that in dc you are likely to get into trouble too)

The drama in marvel is so relatable that I know where I would be in it. If not superpowered, exactly where I am now.

Trying to survive while wanting to fight for what's right, but knowing that if I do so I'll die or my friends family and loved ones will be directly in danger as a result.

DC if I fucked with people in Gotham sure my non hero ass would be fucked. But if I went to metropolis and preached about freedom and rights for everyone, superman likely would protect me last minute (no matter how I dont like him)

Captain America and those like him would want to save me. But the fact is they wouldn't be able to and I would be another casualty in the fight for the right things.

The xmen would thank me while the brotherhood would hate me, even though I stood with both.

Because I wasn't born a mutant I wouldn't be able to be friends with any one in the brotherhood. And I might get to go to school at Xavier's but I'm too old and my mental stuff would prevent me from trying to teach there.

So the only option left in marvel is self insert romances. And I just..... don't feel super strongly that I romantically would be comfortable with anyone. Like im poly and that's a wild concept for people and I dint think a lot of the marvel available characters would be cool with that. And im not letting my partner go, and I don't see abby one character fulfilling me. Like yea I can imagine sexually being interested in characters but that doesn't work solely for what I'm talking about here.

Idk I just think it's really kinda sucky that you gotta be born into it, traumatized into it, or become a superhero's solo thing. Especially when most hero's have a partner planded out already.

But dc their all fuck ups and mix matches. There are those who have no powers, who read books in magic and got powers. Like over all there is so many options. And relationships are fickle there, so like developing something more is an option as well as having a fling.

And their so used to nonsense that polyamory could seems normal to them.

If I had to be raised in a healing environment and what not, marvel. I could go to a person as a kid and get treatment. And live a better normal life. But as I am now nothing would change without powers.

If I just want to embrace everything I am and have power to protect myself and my loved one's without the restrictions of this universe, dc.

[gazemoil]

I 10 ALBUM PIÙ ATTESI DEL 2019

di Viviana Bonura

Il nuovo anno è appena iniziato e questo significa che è il momento di prepararci alle nuove uscite discografiche stilando una lista dei 10 album più attesi del 2019. Questa si prospetta un’annata particolarmente intensa, piena di dischi interessanti e possibili ritorni. Iniziamo con quelli annunciati e per i quali è già prevista una data di rilascio e proseguiamo con quelli che speriamo arrivino, ma non c’è ancora molto di certo.

01. The Japanese House - Good At Falling

Amber Bain, in arte The Japanese House, è uno dei progetti solisti più interessanti dell’indie pop attuale. La teniamo d’occhio da quando, nel 2015, è stata presentata dai The 1975 come loro prediletta, ma sicura di dover ancora trovare la propria identità musicale si è trattenuta dal pubblicare l’atteso album di debutto. Dopo quattro EP entusiasmanti nei quali ha già dimostrato una crescita artistica, la cantante e musicista inglese ha deciso che il momento era arrivato, annunciando Good At Falling, la quale uscita è prevista per marzo. Ad anticiparlo ci sono i singoli Lilo e Follow My Girl.

02. Gomma - Sacrosanto

Dopo aver aperto dei concerti per band internazionali come i Nothing, i Gomma, quartetto di Caserta dalle attitudini emo e post-punk si avvicina al secondo album, Sacrosanto, la quale uscita è prevista per gennaio. Loro lo descrivono come “una riflessione spirituale su chi siamo e cosa abbiamo fatto per noi e per gli altri. Un “secondo” debutto in cui si trasfigurano ricordi, gioie e dolori in pavimenti scivolosi dai quali rialzarsi a fatica, crepe di una casa che cade a pezzi, in rifugi che non danno alcuna difesa, in pareti e scale che si arrampicano dal passato su di noi”. Ad anticiparlo ci sono i singoli Verme e Fantasmi.

03. American Football - American Football (LP3)

Dopo essere tornati con LP2, il loro primo album in diciassette anni, la band colosso dell’emo American Football ha, a quanto pare, intenzione di riprendere la propria attività a tutti gli effetti. Nel 1999 il loro omonimo debutto ha fatto la storia e negli anni il suo culto non ha fatto altro che aumentare. Fortunatamente, non dovremo aspettare - quasi - altri due decenni per ascoltare LP3, in uscita a “soli” tre anni di distanza dal predecessore, nel marzo 2019. La band ha già svelato alcune collaborazioni tra le quali spiccano Haley Williams dei Paramore e Rachel Goswell degli Slowdive. Ad anticiparlo il singolo Silhouettes.

04. Jessica Pratt - Quiet Signs 

Jessica Pratt è, per noi, un nuovo volto dell’intimismo folk. In realtà lei ha già pubblicato due album, ma è solo con Quiet Signs, terzo album la quale uscita è prevista per febbraio, che passa sotto i nostri radar, rapendoci con entrambi i singoli che anticipano il progetto, This Time Around e Poly Blue, tutti addolciti da un sound anni 70′ sbiadito e da una psichedelia soft. Insomma, la Pratt è riuscita a suscitare in noi una certa curiosità.

05. Lana Del Rey - Norman Fucking Rockwell 

Sono ormai anni che Elisabeth Grant, in arte Lana Del Rey, ci propone lo stesso miscuglio di suoni, continuando a passare strati di vernice sopra lo stesso personaggio, quello della diva decadente degli anni 60′, che vorrebbe evolversi ma non ci riesce. Il tempo passa e le suggestioni del suo debutto, Born To Die, sono già state esplorate e nel frattempo le deviazioni mainstream di Lust For Life sono state poco originali ed inopportune. Finalmente, la situazione sembra cambiare e con l’annuncio del nuovo album, Norman Fucking Rockwell, in uscita nel 2019, Lana Del Rey sembra aver capito quale scelte musicali intraprendere per lasciarsi alle spalle il passato e continuare a brillare come artista, facendosi affiancare dal produttore Jack Antonoff aka Bleachers. Il nuovo sound dei singoli Mariners Apartment Complex e Venice Bitch le appartiene, ma allo stesso tempo si avventura su territori meno scontati e lunghezze più alternative, come quella della psichedelia pop. 

06. The 1975 - Notes On A Conditional Form

Il secondo ed ultimo capitolo di Music For Cars arriverà nella seconda metà del 2019 e s’intitola Notes On A Conditional Form. Il loro ultimo album, A Brief Inquiry Into Online Relationships, è uscito a novembre ed è stato da noi molto apprezzato, ma la band capitanata da Matty Healy, stavolta, ha pensato ad un progetto ancora più inclusivo che prevede due album interconnessi tra loro che insieme formeranno un’era discografica distinta e nuova. Per i The 1975 c’è sempre posto.

07. Grimes

Grazie alla sua autonomia ed al suo eclettismo musicale, Grimes fa parte di quegli artisti multiformi, capaci d’intraprendere qualsiasi percorso musicale. Il suo ultimo album, Art Angels, risale al 2015 e da allora abbiamo sentito le sue produzioni nella soundtrack del film della Marvel Suicide Squad, nell’ultimo album di Janelle Monae ed in quello di Poppy. Dopo delle incomprensioni con la sua etichetta, a novembre esce il singolo We Appreciate Power che conferma il suo ritorno da solista per il 2019, e ci presenta nuove sonorità che un attimo tendono al nu-metal revival futuristico e quello dopo ad un glam elettronico fatato fatto di synth scintillanti. 

08. BROCKHAMPTON

iridescence, l’ultimo album dei Brockhampton, è uscito a settembre e si è posizionato altissimo nella nostra classifica dei migliori album dell’anno, ma sappiamo che il contratto con la RCA firmato dalla boy-band americana prevede sei album in totale nel corso dei prossimi tre anni. E’ quindi altamente probabile che nel 2019 pubblichino più di un album e concludano la trilogia The Best Years Of Our Lives. Al momento non c’è nessuna conferma da parte dei diretti interessati, ma sicuramente ci saranno tante sorprese.

09. FKA twigs

Anche il 2018 è stato un anno relativamente silenzioso per la cantautrice, produttrice e ballerina FKA twigs. Dopo il singolo Good To Love del 2016 ci si aspettava a breve un seguito al bellissimo debutto LP1 del 2014 e all’EP M3LL155X del 2015, ma così non è stato. twigs ha preferito dedicarsi prima al ballo e dopo tornare in studio. Sfortunatamente, a maggio dell’anno scorso, l’artista - che solitamente è sempre molto riservata sulle vicende della vita privata - ha rivelato come a bloccare i suoi piani ci sia stata una malattia piuttosto grave. Tornata in forza dopo una lunga convalescenza l’abbiamo potuta rivedere nell’ultimo album di A$AP Rocky e nella pubblicità della Apple insieme alla musica di Anderson .Paak e alla regia di Spike Jonze. Il 2019 offre nuove promesse silenziose, ma sono meglio di niente, dato che twigs ha già reso nota la sua partecipazione a festival estivi come il Primavera Sound. 

10. Childish Gambino 

Donald Glover, in arte Childish Gambino, è stato uno dei simboli del 2018, senza nemmeno aver pubblicato un progetto musicale. This Is America è stato un singolo dall’enorme impatto culturale, in più, gli altri impegni di Glover come scrittore ed attore della serie tv Atlanta hanno contribuito a stimolare la trepidante attesa per quello che, lui stesso ha dichiarato, sarà l’ultimo album come Childish Gambino. E’ dal 2016, con l’ultimo album Awaken, My Love!, che la sua creatività artistica ha subito una svolta salendo velocissima verso l’apice, il che significa che il 2019 sarebbe un momento ideale per dire addio ad un fantastico alter-ego con un disco incredibile.

MENZIONE A:

Coma_Cose

Il duo Coma_Cose ci stuzzica ormai dal 2017 con singoli sempre diversi tra loro che spaziano dall’hip-hop fino all’it-pop. E’ passato ormai abbastanza tempo dal loro primo EP Inverno Ticinese e da allora hanno battuto tantissimi palchi italiani. I Coma_Cose sono sempre in studio e le possibilità che ciò a cui stiano lavorando si trasformerà finalmente in un album sono buone. Non vediamo l’ora di capire come si confronteranno col fatidico esordio.

Chance The Rapper

Nell’estate del 2018 Chance The Rapper ci ha regalato quattro nuove canzoni, le prime dopo il mixtape/album Coloring Book del 2016. Poi, nell’autunno, ha deciso di farcene ascoltare altre due. Non è chiaro cosa il rapper di Chicago abbia esattamente in mente, ma queste nuove tracce potrebbero essere il preludio per un album nel 2019.

Vampire Weekend

Sono ormai cinque anni che gli ascoltatori dell’indie rock aspettano il ritorno dei Vampire Weekend, band che fino ad ora non sembra aver suscitato disappunto con nessuno dei loro tre album. L’ultimo di questi, Modern Vampires Of The City del 2013, è stato persino premiato con un Grammy. Dopo che uno dei membri principali ha deciso di lasciare la band, l’attesa per il nuovo album non ha fatto altro che prolungarsi ed il loro ritorno in live di quest’estate non si è tramutato in nuova musica come molti speravano. Ad ogni modo, i Vampire Weekend hanno confermato che il loro quarto album è pressoché finito e potremo ascoltarlo nel 2019.

Solange

Ad ottobre, l’icona dell’rnb Solange aveva iniziato a stuzzicare l’attenzione affermando che il suo quarto album sarebbe arrivato da lì a poco, nell’autunno. L’autunno è già passato da un pezzo ed il seguito del suo apprezzato A Seat At The Table del 2016 non è ancora arrivato. Eppure, sembra già finito e l’artista l’ha descritto come “più caldo rispetto al composto album precedente. Molto jazz nella sua essenza, ma con accenni elettronici ed hip-hop nella batteria e nei bassi per mantenerlo esplosivo”. Chissà, le probabilità che potremo sentirlo nel 2019 sono discretamente alte. 

Tame Impala

Se fosse per noi, non ci stuferemo nemmeno se i Tame Impala, band nata dal genio di Kevin Parker, pubblicassero un album l’anno. Facendo due conti il 2018 avrebbe potuto essere l’anno giusto per il seguito di Currents del 2015, ma Parker ci sta ancora lavorando, godendosi, nel frattempo, un discreto numero di collaborazioni nel mondo dell’hip-hop e dell’rnb e diventando uno dei produttori più richiesti. Da Travis Scott a Kali Uchis ha dimostrato di saper fare molto di più che semplice psichedelia rock. A questo punto, il prossimo album dei Tame Impala potrebbe davvero sorprenderci. 

Billie Eilish

Billie Eilish è un fenomeno davvero interessante. Ultimamente, la giovanissima cantante americana è esplosa sul web a livello mondiale, riuscendo ad incassare successi su successi con un singolo dopo un altro. Nel 2017 ha pubblicato l’EP don’t smile at me e da allora non si è più fermata, intraprendendo tour infiniti, conquistando l’attenzione di tutti ed il titolo di “migliore promessa della musica pop”. Sicuramente è nella lista e a determinarlo, una volta per tutte, sarà l’album di debutto, con il quale non si è ancora confrontata. lovely, you should see me in a crown e when the party’s over potrebbero proprio essere i singoli principali di un primo album che, onestamente, ci starebbe tutto in questo 2019. 

[clarklexlois]

I was tagged by @bihercs thank you <3

im tagging @lexkent @storyshark2005 @clexoflegends @chase2452 @xlander @doomism @lonesomevillain please don’t feel like you have to do this if you are tagged it’s just for fun so you don’t have to if you don’t want <3

1. name / nickname: Connor. My nickname is Conch.

2. gender: man but in a cool transgender way 😎🏳️‍⚧️

3. star sign: Gemini sun Aquarius moon and Libra rising. Air sign trifecta.

4. height: 5′6

5. time: 7:26pm

6. birthday: June 4th

7. favorite band: The Beach Boys

8. fav solo artist: Lady Gaga or Britney Spears

9. song stuck in head rn: no songs stuck in my head but the last song I listened to was For No One by The Beatles

10. last movie: In & Of Itself on hulu (tho this is a stage performance so not really a movie, it was alright good message but a bit dramatic).

11. last show: Community

12. when i created this blog: 2014, I unfortunately deleted my first account that I made back in 2012. I also have a whole separate account that I made before I found out we can make side accounts but I no longer log into that one.

13. what i post: Mostly Smallville and clex, though I do reblog stuff about other DC media its just superfam and batfam.

14. last thing i googled: Marvel characters with rr initials. yes I am in love with richard rider and reed richards and thought “hey maybe there’s more rr characters for me to love”

15. other blogs: @novadarkhawk is my Marvel side account @xxxholics for anime @twwiinaquariium for Homestuck (yes I am still active in this fandom I know) and @smallvilleclex where I post scenes between Clark and Lex in Smallville I have some other accounts im not active on and some old urls im saving too

16. do i get asks: Yes sometimes and I love them!

17. why i chose my url: my ot3!!! I ship all variations of Clark/Lex/Lois and love them in a poly :D I named the ship cloix so if you ever see me say that this is what im referring to

18. following: 500

19. followers: 371

20. average hours of sleep: oh man this is all over the place for me hmmm. I work an overnight shift so im usually sleep during the morning into the afternoon, but if I have day plans I get up earlier so sometimes I get only 4-6 hours. When I have no plans I wont set an alarm and I’ll sleep for 8-10 hours.

21. lucky number: 4 I guess. 7 is my favorite tho!

22. instruments: I am unfortunately musically inept

23. what am i wearing: black basketball shorts, a red Crashtones band shirt, and my slippers.

24. dream job: uuughh I literally have no clue what I want to do. Don’t want to do what im doing now for the rest of my life tho.

25. favorite food:  um bacon, hotdogs, salad, spaghetti, fried rice.

26. free space: I dont know what to say

27. nationality: American

28. favorite song: Monday, Monday by The Mamas & The Papas

29. last book i read: UM its actually been years since I last managed to finish a book. anyway last book I started was Last Shot: A Han and Lando Novel, last manga I read was Tsubasa Reservoir Chronicle vol.5

30. top three fictional universes i would like to live in:  Justice League Action universe idk why it just seems goofy and fun. Maybe Middle Earth but I dont want to go on any quests I just want to be a cool elf. And I guess another universe where I get to be something cool like a vampire but without all those stupid rules that Vampire stories usually have.

template under the cut!

1. name / nickname:

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5. time:

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9. song stuck in head rn:

10. last movie:

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12. when i created this blog:

13. what i post:

14. last thing i googled:

15. other blogs:

16. do i get asks:

17. why i chose my url:

18. following:

19. followers:

20. average hours of sleep:

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22. instruments:

23. what am i wearing:

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28. favorite song:

29. last book i read:

30. top three fictional universes i would like to live in: