#im like in the middle of year 1 summer and i get jealous of all these people on reddit showing off their farms in like

[captainchokchok]

Craving some stardew valley

[jazzyspams]

I tried to resist

pairing: abby x fem!reader x ellie

rating: explicit. (18+. mdni.)

summary: abby has liked you since high school but you always had eyes for your best friend, ellie; but ellie never saw you that way. which made abby hate you and ellie, ellie for not seeing the girl in front of her who loved her, and you for still being stuck on someone who didn’t truly see you

word count: a little over 7k

warnings: modern college, somewhat love triangle, jealous abby, dom!abby, switch! abby for just a bit, pussy spanking, alcohol, dirty talk, scissoring, teasing, multiple orgasms, lots of jealousy from all characters, begging, degradation kink, praise!!!!!, porn with a feelings, edging, just overall very smutty lmfao

a/n: definitely not proof read, it’s literally 1:28 and this came to mind. please go easy on me and enjoy!

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you’re impatient. looking at the clock, the time read “2:46”. fuck only four more minutes left. you leg was shaking impatiently, you look back to see your worst enemy. the devil itself. abby fucking anderson, she was also looking at the large clock plastered right in the middle in the large classroom

her eyes turned to you and that devil grin she always wore was smacked on her face, she raised her eyebrows in a “its on” type of way. she always did that when she got competitive, but the everyone knows you’re more competitive so you raise your eyebrows back, in the same manner

you look at the clock again, only one minute left. you quickly throw on your backpack and place your hands on the long table that went across the classroom. you prayed that you would get there before abby considering she was on the third row and you were on the second. you looked at the steps and also prayed that they didn’t make you fall

the clock read “2:50” and you ran. you ran up the steps of the classroom, thankfully passing abby. you yelled sorry to the students you bumped into. ellie started running beside you, you didn’t know when but she did; you turn to her and smile

you look back and see abby running behind you; she wasn’t too far behind and she was catching up quick. you saw an opportunity you rarely get and your smile grows bigger “penis breath!” you yell. you can see her throw up her middle finger’s right before you turn back around and quickly stop at your destination

you and ellie try to catch your breath as you stop at the bulletin board, abby follows shortly after you two and searches the bulletin board. as you all found the paper you were searching for, you place your finger on the paper and it reads “captain of the woman’s basketball team = abigail anderson” you can hear ellie curse under her breath

her hands running through her short reddish hair as she cocks her head back in frustration, you place you hand on her shoulder trying to comfort her in some way “fuck, im sorry el’s i know how hard you’ve been working. but hey at least you’re vice captain ” you comment, the pity in your throat rising

abby chuckles mockingly and ellie’s eyes shoot at abby. abby puts her hands up “hey dont hate the player, hate the game” she laughs sarcastically

“you’re a actual dick” you snap.

“yeah, but we all know thats why you love me” she mumbles. you roll your eyes at her annoying sarcasm. “hey, at least you got cheer captain” ellie says with a broken smile and you cant help but to feel bad.

your school released the captins/ vice captains of all the teams the day before summer started, which was weird to all the students but the school still does it every year

“im surprised, i thought jessica would be the captain” abby confessed, you look at abby and for a moment and you want to kill her. you hated jessica and everyone knew that, she always tried to make everything a competition with you and of course abby had to date her, well you weren’t sure if they were dating but everyone knew they had something going on

“abigail, i swear to god if you mention that she-devils name to me one more time i’ll rip that braid out of your head” you almost pout, you can see ellie laugh from the corner of your eye as she walks away in annoyance. everyone knew better than to not be there when you and abby got into it or else they would be caught in the crossfire

“i’d really love to see you try, and honestly this whole ‘im so jealous of jessica’ act really needs to stop. it’s getting old” she laughs hysterically, and your eyes widen at her words. you? jealous of jessica?

you scoff, “oh please abigail, you’re one to talk. your obsession with proving your better than ellie at everything?” you mock her words in a angry tone

she steps closer to you and lowers herself so that she’s your height, she inches closer to your ear. “there’s nothing to prove because i am better than her. academically, socially, and even when it comes to basketball.” she whispers in your ear

you can feel a shiver down your spine as her hot breath touches your ear but you can’t let it phase you. you place your hand on her chest and for a moment you can swear you feel her twitch at your touch. you back your face away a little so you can see her face, to your surprise its red. both of your faces, only a few inches away

“you sure do love to run your mouth abby. you might be better at all those things but theirs one thing ellie’s better than you at,” you pause to observe her face and she looks tempting. her blue eyes so focused on your lips. she raises her eyebrow, waiting for u to finish

“running her mouth. she knows what to say…. what not to say. she really knows how to work that tongue” you finish. her jaw clenches tight at your words and you can help but to give her a innocent smile

she looks as if she’s about to explode and you love every second of it. you trail you hand around her as you walk around her

you see ellie at the end of the hallway and yell at her to wait up and she stops in her tracks and waits for you. as you catch up to her she wraps her arm around your neck and you look back to see abby still standing there with her fists balled

⁀➷

you lay in the grass, on top of your blanket outside the dorm apartments, you probably look weird but you didn’t care. you love the way the sun hit here. not too sunny but not too shady. your eyes are closed and your relaxed, probably the most relaxed you’ve been all year

you let out a deep breath. oddly enough you were gonna miss it here, summer break was only two months but you’ve been living here for a year, with all your friends, and no parents so it would be a little weird nonetheless going back home

suddenly you no longer feel the sun on your face, you open your eyes in confusion. you jump sarcastically once you see who it is

“jesus abigail, dont sneak up on me like that. you know im scared of dogs” you joke, but she doesn’t laugh; her arms are crossed and she looks kinda angry and you start to kinda feel bad

“very funny but i think you’ve got me confused with your mother” she jokes back, and suddenly you no longer feel bad. you roll your eyes as you sit yourself up on your elbows

she lays down on her side beside you on your blanket. you turn your neck and look at her like she’s crazy. you want to tell her to get up or you’ll drag her off but you’re too much in a good mood

she lays on her back with her arms behind her head and closes her eyes. you’re still sitting up on your elbows, looking at her in confusion. you think she can tell your looking at her because she quickly says “dina and jesse wanna know if you’re coming to the party tonight”

you groan at the mention of the party, they had been asking you for weeks if you were coming but you’ve just been ignoring the question. you loved the annual ‘start of the summer’ party, they were fun and all but every time you went there abby made fun of whatever you wear and ellie is always letting some random dance up on her and you didn’t have the energy or strength for another year of it

you wanted to tell ellie how you felt but you knew she didn’t feel the same way and you’ll never forget the day she actually said it. junior year, your whole friend group was at jesse’s house. dina and ellie were outside by the pool smoking weed and jesse thought it would be funny to scare them and then push them in the pool.

you three snuck out the house from the front and entered the backyard from the side. you guys hid behind the tool shed, waiting for the right time to jump out but their conversation got a little too interesting. dina had asked ellie what was going on between you and her because everyone knew you had feelings for ellie since freshman year except ellie. dina was only trying to help and get some information out of ellie but boy did it backfire.

ellie laughed at dina’s words, what was so funny about dating me? you thought. “god dina, she’s my best friend. nothing would ever happen between us” she laughed. you could see the look of horror on jesse and abby’s face and fuck was it so embarrassing, all you could do was leave. abby tried to follow you out and tell you to forget about her but you pushed her away. she didn’t understand. and since that day things fell to shit. abby started hating you, you distanced yourself from ellie and the whole friend group fell apart, causing all of you not to talk for the rest of junior year, but thankfully dina put everything back together right before senior year had started.

so you decided to put your feelings aside for ellie for the sake of the friend group. everything had went back to normal but oddly enough abby went on hating you and ellie and you always wondered why, until you didn’t. you eventually decided that abby was just an asshole

you let out a light sigh at abby’s question and at the memories. fuck abby’s comments and fuck whoever ellie decides to dance with tonight, you thought to yourself. this is the day before you leave and go back home. why not have some fun? shit you deserve it

“yeah. i’ll go” you say proudly. abby lays on her side and looks at you. her eyes blue and so devastating. “so….is your girlfriend coming” she asks, and it sounds as if she’s nervous. you raise your eyebrow in confusion as you lay down on your side, facing her. for a moment its silent as you two look at each other

“ellie” she simply says and you almost laugh at her words. “ellie is not my girlfriend” you scoff. abby looks as if she doesn’t believe your words. the look of devastation is no longer in abby’s eyes, her look was different this time and you couldn’t figure out what it was

“i cant tell the way she drags you around and you follow her” she mumbles. what? you cant believe she just said that. that moment where it was just silent and peaceful between you two was gone. and of course she had to be the one to ruin it. “oh fuck you abby” you breathe out. standing up and attempting to yank your blanket from up under her

she quickly stands up “i-im sorry, i didn’t mean it like that” she stutters and this is the first time you’ve ever heard her say sorry or stutter. “yeah, sure you didn’t” you mutter in disbelief as you fold the blanket around your arm and leave

⁀➷

you stand in your mirror, finishing the final touches of your makeup and hair. you usually never wear you hair down but fuck it? right? you turn around in the mirror to observe yourself, and damn you look good. the short black dress hugged your curves perfectly. you looked fucking good and fuck what anyone (abby) had to say

you smile at yourself right before you leave to walk to the other side of the field, where all the bigger dorms were. the building where all the parties are hosted used to be a fancy hotel building, meaning the rooms were literally huge and luckily dina had one of those rooms

you could already hear the loud music as soon as you walked in, the lobby was filled with decorations and drunk students. you took the elevator to the fifth floor and saw more drunk students being carried away by their sober friends

you walking in dina’s room and holy shit it was bigger than the last time u were here. you could see everyone was having a good time, most students were dancing and some of them were sitting down just talking. you walked over to the counter where the drinks were on display, you grabbed a red solo cup and poured the first hard alcohol you saw. you quickly swallowed it and shut your eyes tight at the burning sensation that flashed down your throat

you turn around, trying to scope the room to see if you saw any of your friends. soon enough you see dina and jesse on the L shaped crème couch. you walk over to them and they looked surprised to see you. “i can’t believe you actually came and oh my god you look amazing ” dina yelps. you smile at the compliment “thanks dina but why are you surprised that im here? didn’t abby tell you” you ask in confusion

dina and jesse look at eachother in confusion. “didn’t you guys ask abby to ask me if i was coming” you question. jesse gives dina a mischievous smile as he takes a sip out of whatever is in his cup, dina shakes her head in disappointment. “no…we didn’t, we know how much you guys hate eachother. if anything we would have asked ellie” she shouts, trying to make sure you hear her over the loud music

your confused. so why would abby lie about something so small. whatever, probably abby just being weird. “yeah thats weird… but speaking of ellie have you guys seen her?” you ask, slightly bending over to make sure they can hear you. they start looking around the room and dina’s eyes widen at something

“oh shit” jesse mumbles loud enough. you stand up and look where dina and jesse have their eyes set and you see ellie behind the counter with jessica. oh my fucking god. they were fucking flirting. ellie pushes her hair back behind her ear and her freckled cheeks are actually red. jessica has her hand on ellies shoulder flirtatiously as she laughs at whatever ellie is saying

you storm over towards them, placing your hands on top of the counter; you cough loudly. ellie’s eyes shoots to you and she looks flabbergasted. she stutters your name and you smile. you can see jessica from the corner of your eye giving you a silent death stare, and you would have returned it but you were too preoccupied with imagining all the ways on how you would beat ellie’s ass. “hey ellie could i talk to you for a sec” you ask with a polite smile

 “s-sure” she stutters, placing her red cup on the counter. you walk over towards the door that leads out to the balcony and ellie follows behind you. “ellie really?” you question in disbelief. she lets down a deep sigh “we were just talking” she replies in annoyance

“ellie. you guys were fucking flirting” you say, the anger in your throat rising and you can feel your blood boiling. you didn’t care that she was flirting with another girl but jessica? out of all of the beautiful, kind, talented woman at this college she had to pick a conniving, back stabbing cunt. so much for best friends ellie

“okay so what? its just flirting, its not like im planning on marrying her” she dismisses you and you cant believe the words that are coming out of her mouth

“ellie thats not the fucking prin-“ you stop yourself and take a deep breath. this isn’t worth it. you didn’t wanna argue. it was a party and the night before you go home. you wont let her ruin your night

“fuck this” you breathe out, walking out onto the balcony. you walk over to the balcony and lean over the railing. trying process what the hell just happened, since when did ellie start acting like that? maybe it was the alcohol and god you really hoped it was

“you okay?” you hear a familiar voice say. you turn around and see abby. for some odd reason you’re happy to see her. no matter how much you both hate eachother, you’ll never forget that she used to be one of your best friends. whether you were arguing or not, she always gave you some sense of comfort that nobody else had gave you. not even ellie

she’s wearing green cargos with a black sleeveless shirt. her hair is down and she’s wearing a cap backwards. she never wears her hair down but tonight she was. you didn’t want to admit it but she looked good. she was holding a cup in her hand; her muscles glistened in the dim light and they looked more hard than they usually did as if she’d been working out before she came here. who was she trying to look so good for?

you nod your head at the question she asked earlier. abby was known for being the life of the party but for some reason she was out on the balcony, alone. “are you?” you ask, returning the question.

she nods “yeah, me and jessica just got into a fight”. her voice low and disappointing. no wonder jessica was in there throwing herself at ellie. a part of you wants to comfort her but a part of you tells you don’t do it because you guys will just go back to hating eachother tomorrow

“im sorry to hear that but if it makes you feel better, so did me and ellie” you give her a comforting smile. she returns the smile “it does” she admits. you laugh at her honesty

her eyes rake over your body and you can feel every part that they touch. you felt nervous as she looked at you. her eyes so intent and focus. her eyes finally meet yours and for a moment you swear her eyes are speaking to you

maybe it was the shot of alcohol you took earlier but you can feel your body pulling to hers like electricity. before you know it your legs are moving towards her. you’re in front of her and she’s just admiring you. your eyes, your eyebrows, your nose, and your lips; especially your lips. the tension was thick and heavy and you loved it

why was she staring at you like that; and why did you like it so much.

you look down and notice the drink in her hand, the cup half full. you slowly slide your hand up her veiny hand, taking the cup from out her grasp. “you dont want this do you?” you ask, your voice laced with seduction and desire

what was happening. why did you want her so fucking bad.

she shakes her head, as she watches you drink the alcohol that was in her cup. fuck you had to get out of here before you did something you would regret. you quickly break the eye contact between you two and place the cup down on the patio table that abby stood in front of

you grab her hand, leading her back into the party. theirs more people than there was before. everyone is dancing, either on someone or with someone.

the weeknd is playing. ‘the party & the after party’.

you still have abby’s hand in yours. you walk the both of you over to where everyone is dancing. she automatically knows what to do. her hands grip on your waist tight. her hands rough and warm. you tremble a little at her touch. you’re pushed up against her. you sway your hips in accordance with the song. you can feel yourself starting to get hot. a little from the alcohol but mostly from the way she made you grind against her. she lets out a shaky breath at the feeling

you flip your hair to the right side of your head, attempting to cool yourself down but it doesn’t work. you’re still so fucking hot. abby refuses to let this opportunity pass, planting her face in your exposed neck. you can feel her biting at your skin. you whimper at the sensation, you could feel your underwear getting more and more soaked with every touch

you place one of your hands on hers, turning your head to the side to face her, sliding your free hand underneath her long hair and letting it rest on her neck. you had pulled her to look at you and she did. your faces so close, she was breathing hard and so were you. she inches closer towards you, your lips ached for hers but you couldn’t.

you push her away, breaking your bodies apart; leaving you both empty with nothing but lust and desire in your mind. “w-we shouldn’t” you breathe out. the look in her eyes, filled with disappointment. she simply nods, walking away

your eyes follow her as she attempts to leave but dina stops her, whispering something in her ear and abby nods. leaving anyway.

you need to get somewhere quiet to think. you push through the crowd trying to find dina’s room, you walk down the hallway filled with students in line for the bathroom. once you reach the end of the hall you find dina’s room, you open the door and you’re stunned by what you see

jessica’s shirt off with ellie on top of her, literally eating her face. their eyes shoot at the door, ellie looks like she’s seen a ghost and you can hear her say your name. you open your mouth to say something but nothing comes out. your disgusted, hurt, betrayed, and heartbroken. all you can do it walk away

you think ellie is following behind you but you dont care, you cant stop walking; soon enough your out of dina’s dorm. you can feel hot tears coming down your face as you stalk towards the elevator. you feel her grab you. “please wait, let me explain myself” she begs. you face her at once and snatch your hand away

“what ellie? what the fuck could you possibly say” you almost scream. the tears just keep rolling down and you just want them to stop, you quickly wipe them away. she looks down for a moment before she looks back up at you

“please stop crying. i-i just saw you dancing with abby an-“ you cut her off quickly

“you saw me dancing with abby so think thats enough for you to go ahead and fuck jessica? you’re supposed to be my best friend” you whimper. your infuriated. you can feel your heart breaking into tiny pieces

“i am, fuck. im sorry, im so fucking sorry” her eyes become watery. but the crocodile tears wont work this time, you’re not sure anything will

“so then why? why her, why jessica” you question, wiping your hand over your face, trying your hardest to suppress the tears

she sighs low in disappointment, “she was just there” she simply says

you step back. in disbelief. you scoff “she was just there? ellie i have been here for six fucking years, through every heartbreak you had. when riley had to move, you stayed at my house; crying in my arms, all fucking day and i was there! i had to pretend like my heart wasn’t aching for you so fucking badly all those years,” you pause to take a breath

“junior year, when you laughed at the thought of having something with me and you swore to dina that nothing could ever happen between me and you, i had to pretend like my heart wasn’t shattered and go back to being your loyal best friend like it was nothing” you finished. it felt like a huge load had been lifted off your shoulders at the confession

ellie’s eyes widened in realization. her hand wraps around her mouth as she steps back. realizing what you had just told her. she whispers your name lowly as she inches towards you, she attempts to grab your hands but you yank them away. “ellie just stop. im done.” you say firmly

her head drops, in shame. she had fucked up terribly, and she knew it. you release a deep breath you’d been holding inside for too long. as you walked away quietly.

⁀➷

the walk back to your dorm was quiet, you cried the whole way back. as soon as you entered your room you wiped the make up off and threw the tight dress off into the corner and threw on a oversized shirt

why did you think going to that party was a good idea? all you gain from them is trauma. you didn’t know who to think of. abby or ellie? you needed to get this whole fucking party off your mind. the only thing keeping you sane was the thought of melting into your bed in the nice cool ac.

as you walk towards your desk to grab your computer you hear a low knock on the door. you groan at the sound. you walk towards your door in annoyance. you open it to see abby, holding a box of beer.

you more than surprised to see her. she pushes past you, walking into your room and placing the box of beer down near your desk. you quietly shut the door behind her.

“a-abby, what are you doing here” you stutter in confusion. and why in the hell did she have a box of beer?

she walks towards you, and her hands cup your face. her eyes shined in the low candle light. she looks so hurt, that wall she had built up for so long was gone. you could tell she had something say. something was eating her alive

“she doesn’t deserve you” she finally speaks. you shudder at her words. you can’t. you just cant deal with this right now. you put your hands on her hard chest and try to shake your head away from her but she just yanks you closer, forcing you to look at her

“i’ve tried to resist the fact that i want you. i’ve tried for so fucking long and i succeeded until today. when you talked about ellie earlier today it did something to me,” she pauses for a second as she inches closer to your face

“the way you danced on my tonight, made me wanna rip that tight little dress off and fuck you in front of everyone” she confesses. you shiver at her words, breathing hard at her confession. your lips so close like how they were earlier

she whimpers your name against your lips and it sounds heavenly. your about to cave in. “eyes dont lie. i know you want me to fuck you. just say the words and i will. better than ellie ever could” she whispers again. her voice dark and seductive

you can say anything you just nod. but that doesn’t work. she doesn’t go for that. “say it” she demands. and you can’t do anything but comply

“fuck me. p-please abby” you beg. she smirks at your words, smashing her lips into yours. the kiss hungry and rough, she groaned softly as she tasted your sweet soft lips on hers. she slams you against your door as your bodies moved in sync with eachother, she pushes your hands up over your head as she lowers her kisses down your neck, kissing the spots she had marked earlier. the hot breathy kisses on your neck making you moan lightly

she lifts the shirt over your head, throwing it somewhere. she admires your body in the black bra and lacy underwear you wore, “fuck” she groans, kissing you so needy. she picks you up again the door and you wrap your legs around her, refusing to break the hot kiss. she grabs your legs tight, making sure you won’t fall as she walks over towards your bed

laying you down on your back as she hooks her hands around your back, unhooking your bra. allowing your boobs to spill out, just for her eyes. she kissed along your jaw as her rough long fingers started to play with your hardened nipples. her kisses lowering, and turning into hickey’s the lower she got. finally her warm mouth takes one of your boobs in her mouth as she grabs the other one with hand

her eyes stay on you the whole time, watching you squirm and twitch under her touch, she loved it. seeing you laid out on display just for her. quiet moans escaping your mouth as she pulled, biting softly on your nipple as she released it from her mouth

your pussy was pooling with precum. you’ve never wanted to be touched so bad in your life. she gets on her knees. making you put your hands over her shoulders. she runs her thick long fingers over your pussy. “p-please abby” you pant out

you feeling her long hot tongue, slowly run over your clothed aching pussy. a whimper leaves your mouth and you back up a little at the warm sensation. she yanks you closer towards her tongue, doing it again; but this time slower. you shut your eye’s tight. she notices and plants a spank on your pussy. your eyes shoot open

“i want you to watch me tease you, i want you to know how i felt all these years” she confesses, spitting on your pussy, the laced material is cheap, so you can feel the spit trailing down your already wet folds

you look down and see her already looking up at you, her smirk large and her eyes unforgiving. you don’t know how much longer u can handle her teasing. she moves the cheap material to the side as she slowly rubbed her thick fingers against your swollen folds

“you want me to touch you here” she teases. you nod your head quickly, a little too quickly. causing a evil chuckle to leave her lips “really? how bad” she teases more, her voice now dark with desire. the flood of arousal starting to drip more at her teasing

“s-so fucking bad abby” you whimper. she takes your underwear and pulls them down, you lift up, giving her more access to pull them down easily. the feeling of the cool air hitting your aching pussy making you moan slightly

her hot breath glistening over your wet lips. you can feel her breathing again you as she stamps her hands on your thighs. her eyes hungry and impatient. “god im gonna fuck you with my tongue til’ you cry” she mumbles

you’re breathing hard as she pulls you closer to her mouth. the full length of her long tongue slowly and gently slides against your slits. you whimper softly at the sensation, chest thumping in pleasure

her hands digging into your thighs. your arms above your head as you move against her tongue. the feeling of her breathing and her hot tongue against you, making you close. her teeth graze against you clit. her hands release from your legs and find its place on your waist, pinning you down to stop all your movement

“you taste so fucking good. like i knew you would” she breathes out. face deep in your cunt. you can feel your toes curl as her nose grazes against your sensitive spot. your moans filling the room

“who’s tongue better now?” she pants, mocking your words from earlier. you dont hesitate to answer “yours, god yours abby” you whimper, her dirty words sending you over the edge as the sensation in your stomach builds. you can feel your legs shaking as you reach your high

you grab her by the shirt, pulling her towards you to taste yourself on her tongue. you pull her sleeve shirt over her head and throw it where your shirt layed. you moan at the sight of her muscled body “you’re so fucking hot abby” you pant, grabbing her again and kissing her harder

“shut up” she mumbles in between your lips. she breaks the kiss, throwing her shoes off and her pants with them, revealing the womans boy shorts she wore. her muscled thighs turned you on so bad. you quickly get on top of her, kissing down her neck and leaving a bite mark with every kiss. her groans sounding like music to your ears

you snatched off her sports bra, you slowly tease her with your tongue around her boob “fuck, don’t tease me” she growls. you smile against her skin as you start softly sucking on her boob. her hands behind her head and she keeps her eyes focused on you.

you trail your tongue down from her breast to her waist, where her underwear stopped. you pulled them off. you lift yourself up to her lips “i bet i can fuck you better than jessica can” you whisper on her lips. she smirks “prove it” she whispers back.

you take the challenge. you position yourself in between her legs, one of her legs lay on top of yours and your other leg lays on top of hers. you can see her bite her lip at the feeling of both of your both of your wet cunts touching. you place your hands on her hard chest as you start to grind against her. both of your warm clits, messages eachothers

you can feel her hands slap roughly into your ass as she grinds you harder against her. the whine that falls from her lips shocked you, sending a shiver through your body.

moans spilled from your lips. you shoot your head back at the feeling of both of you against eachother. she was pushing you down on her hard, forcing you to go fast and it felt fucking euphoric. everything disappeared except for you and her and suddenly nothing else mattered. just this feeling. only abby mattered. “fuck” she spit , her nails digging into you waist.

she moans your name and you can feel tears of pleasure leaving your eyes, your second orgasm was close. “just like that, fuck me like you hate me” she cursed, and you went faster, grinding harder. her clit was pulsating against yours as you both reached your high together almost screaming

you collapse on top of her as both of you try and catch your breath. her large arms wrap around your sweaty body. you both lay there for a second, before abby gets up, placing you to the side and putting your blanket over you.

“where are you going” you ask, disappointed. as she puts back on her bra and underwear. she looks back at you and smiles “just grabbing my phone, to tell dina come get these beers” you nod, smiling back

holy shit. you just fucked abby. and it was really fucking good. oh god what did this make you guys. relax you thought. just relax. you took a deep breath before you moved the blanket off of you and hopped out your bed. you grabbed abby’s sleeveless shirt and put it on. it was a little big but you liked how it looked

you walked over towards your desk and admired yourself in the shirt. you didn’t notice it but abby was watching you. “don’t be weird” you laugh, she smirks

“what? you look good” she snickers, eyeing you down. you roll your eyes. you hear a knock on the door and look at abby

“damn she was quick” you comment, picking up the case of beers, considering the fact that abby didn’t have anything on. you opened the door with struggle, keeping your eyes on your feet as you pushed your foot in front of it to hold it back

you look up and see ellie. she looks behind you and sees abby on your bed, half naked. she nods her head in disbelief. youre too stunned to speak. “fucking hypocrite” she scoffs, leaving you in utter shock.

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a/n: please remember this wasn’t proof read, literally made off the top of my head, hope you guys liked it as much as my  delusions did

[dracosathenaeum]

OBLIVIATE | D.M.  ABANDONED FIC OUTLINE

Hello~

I’ve had this fic for @fuckingdraco ‘s writing challenge outlined for almost a year now. Half of it is a skeleton; i have some scenes which are fully written out and others which are just first drafts and idea dumps. this is quite literally copied and pasted so good luck if you read it.

I never had the heart to completely delete it but never liked it enough to write it; so here is my 2.2k draft fo what would’ve been a series. 

If anyone decides to read it, be warned, it’s a mess. i just didnt want it to die in my notes so it’s having a life here, in my new section of my masterlist ‘fics that never saw the light of day’.

warnings: memory loss, fight scenes, gore, fighting

//

Being in a secret relationships had its ups and downs

You had to sneak around

But that just made the moments you were together so much more meaningful

You couldn’t brag about him to your friends

But the both of you were quite private people anyways, explaining your absences as studying in odd places

No one ever found out

It was just you and draco

The summer of 5th year was hard as he spent all of it in the south of France with his family

But it made coming back in 6th year so much more exciting

your fingers ached to touch him as you walked past his carriage

It was moments like this that you wish you could openly love him

But when your friends started gossiping about how Harry Potter thought he’d become a death eater, you were suddenly glad you weren’t linked to him publicly

That thought itself set a heavy weight of guilt on you

He came back in 6th year and he had changed

His kisses lost their spark

His eyes lost their light

He’d fuck you rough and hard, almost as if forgetting himself. Before making it up to you in the next instance

Slow love making that made you feel like you had just slept with an entirely different person

You followed him

You supposed you shouldn’t have

But he was skipping meals and you couldn’t exactly talk to his friends when they didn’t know you

You couldn’t confide in your friends as they wouldn’t understand

So you had no other choice

You followed him throughout the nights, and every time you would find him slipping into the room of requirement when he should’ve been slipping into bed with you

Once you had gauged what time he usually went and on what days you yourself went, 10 minutes before he was due

You watch as he fiddles around some ancient looking cupboard and you wonder why you’re jealous of a dead tree taking up dracos time

You watch as he sends things through, until finally it works for him

But its not happiness on his face nor relief

It looks like dread

He doesn’t look like he’s accomplished something, no there was no way

You watch as he takes off his tie, throwing it in the pile of robes and jumper

You watch as he rolled up the sleeves to his arms, the arms that had held you up more times than you could count

And you watch as the dark snaking lines of the dark mark are exposed on your lovers skin

His eyes whip round to see yours, instantly widening in fear

It isn’t until you try to walk towards him and he throws his hands up to stop you do you realise the shattered glass littered around you

He flicks his wand and you walk over, standing in front of him trying to figure out why

“How did you hide it from me for so long.”

“Simple charms, I was hoping you wouldn’t have to find out.”

More dialogue where he explains

“I don’t have a choice.”

“You always have a choice.”

Draco please

“I can’t, I had to take this on my skin because my father fucked up”

“If I, if I stop now, I cant save my mother”

“Draco please, we can find a way around this”

You kiss him

And it feels like you’ve both gone back to before 6th year

When times were simpler

When he loved you and you loved him and that was it

No other interruptions

“Oblivate”

PART 1

“Y/n?”

“I’m sorry, do I know you?”

“Draco Malfoy, we share some classes but we haven’t spoken before.”

“Oh, im sorry, of course. I’m really tired I dont usually forget peoples names I swear. I must’ve been so tired I wandered in, I apologise.”

“It’s okay, the doors over there.” You take that as his polite cue of asking you to leave

He offers a tight smile, one you remember from first year, one you remember seeing across the hall as he’s shut down by Harry Potter

Poor guy must be going through something

“Y/n”

you turn, you dont even hesitate. You dont know what it is but you feel as if you’ve known him all your life

You change and you see a gold ring dangling from a dainty gold chain. You ask your friends if they’ve seen it before

im forgetting so much these days

But you keep it on, it brings you an odd sense of comfort

You keep it tucked beneath your blouse, bringing it to you lips on occasion when youre anxious.

//

He had forgotten about his ring, the very ring you had clasped between your thumb and finger as you worked on your essay. How was he possibly supposed to get it from you

he’s well aware he’s staring but his mind is whirling

He needs that ring

“Draco, isn’t that your ring?”

He should’ve obligated himself, that might’ve been easier

“I’m sure it just looks similar.”

“Draco, we both know that’s the Malfoy famlily crest, I wondered why you stopped wearing it.”

“Wait did she steal it?”

misplaced it

She picked it up

He had to awkwardly walk over to pick it up

“That’s my ring.” You had told him all about how your friends hated him and how you had feigned indifference the entire time

He had to act the part

Youre flustered, eyes flicking between the ring and him, fingers clasping it tighter as if not wanting to let it go

He notices and his heart clenches at the sight

Remembering the night he gave it to you

*flash back*

“I’m so sorry, I must’ve picked it up by accident here.”

“Wait, how do you even know it’s his, prove it Malfoy.”

“My vaults could buy Hogwarts, why would I be stealing gold from a nobody?”

Your cheeks flare up and your friends glare at him but see his side

You struggle to unclasp it, and of course you fucking do because his stupid fucking ass charmed it so only he could take it off

he watches as you struggle with it, turning to a friend to help before you have 6 girls pulling at the very expensive chain on your neck

“For fucks sake youre going to damage it, let me.”

Your breath hitches as his surprisingly warm fingers brush your hair out of the way, fingers working quick to unclasp the necklace, the weight of it leaving your neck and you feel surprisingly empty

“Thank you.”

You watch as he goes, your fingers scratching over your neck, feeling something bubble in your throat

This was pathetic, you were so sad over something that was never yours in the first place

You spend the remainder of the time trying to figure out how you cam to be in possession of it in the first place

//

your name is written in beautiful cursive on a letter that you cannot help but love

You turn it over to see a beautiful wax seal on it, fingers trembling as you break it

The chain is yours.

d.m.

You tilt the envelope over into your hand to feel the familiar weight of the chain in your hand, clasping it around you neck in an instant

You look in the mirror but you dont recognise yourself

Your friends are surprised when you study with them

When you go back to your dorm room at a reasonable time

And you dont have a clue where it is they think you go

But how could you possibly explain to someone what you font remember

The chain is too light around you neck, its just not the same, it feels as if it’s chocking you rather than bringing you comfort

You start digging through your trunk and draws, looking for something to act as a pendant before you finally do.

Hidden at the back of one of your draws you find a little velvet box you dont remember stashing away. But then again, you dont seem to be remembering much these days.

Its a tiny little constellation of stars, charmed to sparkle and you heart wonders why you had never worn it before. It was a simple little charm but once hooked onto the necklace, you look at yourself in the mirror and finally feel as though a little part of you has returned.

PART 2 THE CONSTELLATION IS DRACO

6th and 7th years are a blur

A blur of horror

You dont really understand how life had changed so abruptly

You dont know how you end up fighting in a war at the age of just 18 but here you are

Draco stands with Hogwarts

And then his mother calls

You’ve seen him

Of course you have

You know what he is, know what his parents are

But you also know what he has done to make Hogwarts more bearable for you under the Carrows watch

The small things, diverging attention away from you and your friends

He wasn’t evil and some part of you knew that

You watch as he takes a shuddering breath and starts to walk

You watch as no one stops him

You watch as he loses more of his soul with each step towards mr no-nose

You dont know why you do it

You run

Your friends call your names, teachers joining in

They think youre joining the other side, they think youre fucked in the head, as they had since that incident in 6th year

But no, you were just missing something

you catch up to him pretty quickly, pulling him to a stop

“Ah, another to join my cause. Welcome young lady.”

“You know me. Im missing something but whenever I’m with you, whenever im holding this stupid constellation close to my heart, I feel at ease. Why”

he stares at you incredulously, and why wouldn’t he. Youre in the middle of a battlefield, Harry Potter has just been declared dead and Voldemort is less than a meter away

But you dont feel scared

And you feel stupid for not feeling scared

“It has felt like I dont even know who I am for the past 2 years, what did you do to me?”

You know everyones watching, you can hear the gasps on both sides as they think the worst of him

“I did what was necessary.” That was the first time he had spoken more than 2 words to you since he had gotten his necklace back that day in the library

“Draco, this is no time to be flirting. Come join me, bring her with you if you want.”

He tenses as voldy rests a boney hand on his shoulder, pulling him towards the other side, away from you

“If you won’t be joining us, we will use you an example of what will happen if you dont join us.”

You stare at him unfazed, fear was something you had gotten used to

Your fingers grip your wand in hand, running through all the spell harry had taught you in the da but its not enough

You are no match for voldy as he throws an unforgivable at you

You hear screams around you but all you hear is silence, as if the world had finally gone silent

//

Draco watched as the spell hit you directly in the chest. He had spent 2 years living with his actions all for it to have gone to naught in a single second

He watched as the light from his wand hits you

Before rebounding off you as if it hit a shield

There’s a flash of black and his mother is infront of him, wand out from deflecting the spell from bouncing back and hitting him

“Mother?”

“She’s important to you?”

“She gave him one of the fucking family heirlooms, either she’s important to him or he’s an idiot”

His parents were… bickering in the middle of a battle

voldy recollects himself but before he can talk neville speaks up “I have no idea what’s going on but-”

Draco drowns out the noise as he stares at you on the floor, youre covered in dust and in blood but youre alive

He hears screams as harry rolls from hatreds arms, he hears the cries from death eaters but all can see is you

“We’re switching sides now?”

“I mean he’s fairly distracted, he won’t have time to hunt us down, we owe it to our son.”

Fight scene

You remember everything

Fred Weasley teases the both of you, “we have a war to win, you can fuck later.”

He copy his lazy grin, a grin that lights you up, a grin that reminds you what’s left to fight for

You see the spell before he does

Youre in an arms reach of him but Draco cant reach you in time

You push Fred to the floor, putting yourself in the line of fire by default and draco has to watch you get hit all over again

“We need to talk about what exactly it is ive been wearing around my neck this entire time.”

“I think only my mother can answer that.”

[if you made it this far, send me an ask with the word ‘chicken’ and i’ll send you a cursed photo xx]

[wagner-fell]

Spiders Are Ugly And Other Lies Capitalism Has Told Us (part one)

“Dad,” Astrid called out, shutting the coral coloured front door behind her. “Are you home?”

She dumped her cream tote bag spray painted with the words ‘Washing Machine Heart’ in big, rainbow letters onto one of the stools facing the granite countertop. The rest of the Merry Hoes followed suit. It was weird seeing a person as chaotic as Astrid in such a calm environment.

They were all spending the summer in LA with Astrid and her Dad. It had taken a while for Kevin to convince his family it was a good idea. Especially because he and Blessica had finally put years of pinning behind them. Making out on Kit’s bed at Mina’s third birthday party certainly wasn’t the way they had envisioned it but as the longing was over with, they were happy.

The Chu’s didn’t love the idea of their son living in a different country for three months with his girlfriend but we’re on board once Kevin assured them there was no possible way Blessica could get pregnant.

Kit wasn’t officially sleeping at the Yang’s but at the Institute with his boyfriend. Julian wasn’t so thrilled about the situation but Emma was. She was positively ecstatic about having a training partner as skilled as Kit was, courtesy of Jem and Tessa. Though staying a thirty minute drive away (on the wrong side of the road, Mari noted) wouldn’t keep Kit away for long. Even now he was with them instead of having his own reunion make out session.

Speaking of making out…

Mari rested their chin on the top of Astrid’s head and wrapped their arms around her middle. “Why don’t you show us your room while we wait for your dad to get home.”

It was kinda perfect, Mari often remarked, that she realized her feelings for their best friend weren’t so platonic as she previously led herself to believe at the same time they and Kit realized they were better off as just platonic.

Astrid hit her hand playfully. “That’s not fair!” she whined! ”How dare you take advantage of my constant hornyness when my God-fearing Presbyterian father could be in the next room? Shame! Shame on you, shame on your family, shame on your cow.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s ‘dishonor’”, said Kit, who didn’t even look up from his phone when he addressed her, “but go off I guess.”

Astrid looked like she was questioning all her life choices up to this point. “A white boy knows Mulan better than me.” She shook her head in disgust. Mari could feel the loose hairs of her girlfriend’s ponytail ticking her exposed collar bone. “Mulan.”

Mari laughed before softly brushing their lips against Astrid mop of bleached strands of pastel yellow, pink and blue mixed magnificently with her natural inky black.

“Is hornyness even a word?” Kevin wondered aloud as he observed the knickknacks placed at even intervals utop the kitchen cabinets. Blessica was with him. She was gazing at one of a crab steering a ship when she spotted a slim piece of paper taped below it.

“Ast,” she called. The both looked in her direction, despite Blessica needing the attention of one. “Your dad says he won’t be home till seven. Emergency at work.”

“Which leaves us more than enough time to pack and head over to meet Ty, Dru and Thaìs at the arcade,” said Kit. He finally turned his phone off and shoved it into the back pocket of his ripped jeans. “Marstrid can do the ol’ devil’s tango then catch up to us.”

‘Marstrid’ wrinkled their noses. “I thought we agreed on Astari, Christopher.”

“Astari sounds gayer,” confirmed Kevin, his eyes never leaving the miniature decorations.

“Not to be rude but why does Astari sound gayer?” asked a visibly confused Blessica.

“Because,” answered Mari, unraveling herself from Astrid to slide onto one of the bar stools and reaching into the Jolly Rancher jar, blindly searching for a green, “Astari has ‘star’ in it. Star equals astrology. An obsession with astrology is the price you pay for the gay agenda. Besides, Marstrid sounds like an old southern lady.” Then she furrowed her eyebrows and swiveled to face Astrid. “Southern is Texas, right?” Astrid nooded, a smile so big the Cheshire Cat would be jealous.

Without looking, she stuck her hand in the jar and pulled out a green apple flavoured hard candy on her first try. She held it out to Mari, who snatched it out of her hand with an angry huff.

“Hey, Ast, where do you guys keep the crisps?” asked Kevin when he finished inspecting all the knickknacks.

“Uh, under the barbecue sauce, I think.”

Kit’s eyes lit up. “So I’m sitting there”- Astrid understood what was happening in just enough time to quote- “barbecue sauce on my titties” in unison.

Mari put her head into their open palms, still sucking on the pity candy. “Why is this my type?”

“Are you sure this is the right place?” asked Blessica as Kit attempted to parallel park outside the location Ty had texted him to meet at. Key word, attempt. When Tessa had taught him to drive, he’d been such a disaster at parallel parking she had instructed him to ‘take the underground when tight spaces might be a possibility.’ Which he prided himself in doing. But this was America and the underground was called the subway, so, technically, no rules were being broken.

“Yes, Blessie, I’m certain.”

“Okay. Just checking cause a few turns back the GPS said-”

“Blessie!” He nearly crashed into the car in front of him.

“Right. Shutting up.”

When Kit managed to park with minimal damage and the three were about to exit, the voice of Nicki Minaj boomed from his pocket. Ty was calling him. He accepted the call, putting it on speaker.

“Hello Tiberius.” There was giggling from the other end of the line. A groan soon followed it.

“It’s been a year,” came the annoyed voice of Dru. “Get over your British kink already.” Kevin’s laughter echoed from the backseat.

“Hey Ty!

“Hi Kevin.”

”Hey Dru!”

“Fuck off.”

“Ouch. Why do you feel the need to hurt me so?” Blessica laughed.

“Hey…Thaìs?”

“Here,” replied Thaìs cheerfully.

“Are you here yet,” asked Ty.

“Uh, yeah! We were just getting out of the rental car when you called. You didn’t tell me it was going to be crowded. I had to parallel park!”

“What are you talking about?” interrupted Dru. ”There are only four cars in the parking lot.”

“But,” Ty countered, “there are lots of Billy’s Fun Zones’ around here. You guys must have got mixed up and taken a wrong turn. I could have sworn I sent you the correct location on GPS.” Maybe Ty said more on the subject but Kit could hear anything or see anything except the superior smirk Blessica was giving him.

He covered the speaker. “Not. A. Word.” And no word came out of her mouth the entire ride to the correct Billy’s Fun Zone but the ‘I told you so’ look on her face spoke loud enough.

Kit slid back into the booth next to Ty, handing him his pretzel. Ty kissed him on the check in gratitude.

Dru and Ty were right. About this one being empty. He told him he had heard about it from Alyssa. Her pack frequented it often. They were left alone because, well, there was no one else there to bother them.

“Where are Astrid and Mari?” he asked.

“Fucking. I think. Or maybe just making out. I’ll know which one when they finish.” When Ty gave him a puzzled look he continued, “Astrid describes it all to me in full detail. I honestly don’t know whether she doesn’t have a filter or she just needs someone to scream to about how amazing Mari is.”

“Why can’t it be both?”

“True, true.”

They sat in comfortable silence for a few minutes before Ty picked up the conversation again. “When Thaìs first met Astrid, she had a huge crush on her. They got along great. I always thought they would end up together. Or hook up at the very least.”

“Huh, that’s funny,” observed Kit.

“What is?”

“When me and Mari split, I was planning on trying to set them up with Thaìs. But then I caught her ans Astrid making out in a storage closet at school. Which, in hindsight, was pretty stupid cause they were in there so I wouldn’t be sad Mari moved on when I opened the door in the first place avoiding her to call you.”

“Hmmmm.”

The gears in Ty’s head were visibly turning. Kit loved watching this process. An idea was forming in his boyfriend’s genius mind, he could sense it.

“What is their stance on monogamy?” he asked finally.

“Um, fuck, hold on. Mari sent me this whole speech about it.” Kit scrolled through his phone at a rapid rate before he saw what he was looking for. He cleared his throat and began reading aloud.

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:52 AM: monogamy is just another lie capitalism has fed us

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:55 AM: like, for example, the notion that house spiders are ugly and to be feared

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: it’s just to sell bug spray

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: same with monogamy

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:56 AM: pointless!!!

Mari_da_bisexual_whore, sent 1:58 AM: in conclusion, if I want to join a polyam cult, who tf is the government to stop me?

Kev-Kev, sent 2:01 AM: mari please go to sleep

Bless-ing_to_the_world, sent 2:04 AM: ^^^^^^^^^^^

Mitski_my_love, sent 2:05 AM: preach!

Mitski_my_love, sent 2:05 AM: go off queen

By the time Kit was finished with his dramatic reading, Ty’s plan was fully formed.

“That settles it! We are going to play matchmakers!”

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Alyssa, Ty’s friend mentioned is @thechangeling OC, not mine.

@the-blackdale @the-wckd-powers @adoravel-fenomeno @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @illusions-give-reasons-to-live @ithurielkeepsgettingkidnapped @im-not-ruined-im-ruination @sofiatheskeleton @cncnbr @its-taff @noah-herondale-lightwood @maxboythedog @arangiajoan @shelvesofgold @book-dragon-not-worm sorry if I missed anyone LMK if you want to be added or removed from The tag List!!

[goshawk]

ok. here goes. needed to collect my thoughts some more from last night but the same cautions apply

each year the nights around new years/my birthday since they’re p close i reflect on what’s happened. i started doing so in middle school and it’s something i’ve tried to keep up. introspect a little

transferring really fucked me up. i keep thinking that i want more academics and more options and a bigger pond to be a fish in but i 1) definitely have some sort of academic trauma that’s fed into learned helplessness 2) can’t regulate what is enough academics and what isnt because i do love learning and im a stupid academic type 3) fucking suck at socializing why the hell did i think i could go to such a large school 4) left a school where there were people i knew from hs and would actually connect with 5) left my best friend/roommate who i was maybe in love with for way too long and will never tell her but god i dont even want a relationship ill take any emotional intimacy.

transferring really isn’t my biggest gripe. it’s just the most significant thing that’s happened to me this year and encapsulates a lot of what’s fucked up.

i want friendship and studying together and giggling in my room and texting something funny and i could be a really good friend if i could just get my head out of my ass and say something interesting and relatable for once. im in a limbo where i think i’m interesting and don’t really want to change myself but dont think that others find me interesting at least at first interaction so where does that leave me.

i’ve driven myself away from one of my formerly close friends a while ago now. she got really, really high and mighty during 2020 protests and also getting into harvard gave her an ego boost she probably needed but also made her insufferable for some time. and seeing her as a freshman now (took a gap yr) and having a thicket of friends and going out is just. how the fuck did you do that. are you the same person i knew and sat in the locker room with. did i only like you then because we were both fucked up and is it fair for me to hate that you’ve moved on. do you recognize me. and im not stupid enough to claim that im not jealous but i hate what that’s made me and i hate that it keeps driving a wedge. i think about texting her sometimes, mostly when i see that she’s the only one of my friends still up at stupid hours, but then i think about what a fucking failure she was when i needed emotional support re: summer 2020 and how i offered that at the drop of a hat through the entirety of high school. literally where were you when i needed you. what would i even get from her now i hate it i hate it but im so lonely

but that’s a little too far back for 2021. i ended the year prior to last by maybe sending myself into an anxiety (panic?) attack for the first time. not doing great on that front this year. i transferred and incurred all that shit listed above. my health has in fact decided to get worse, especially these last two weeks. the only positive is the volunteer work i do with the raptors but honestly, does that really offset everything else?

i want it to. i want it to so badly and i want that to be how i meet other students and friends and socialize because you meet friends through common interests but im an econ major in a group of bio students and im not taking the same classes. god i dont know how to speak to people. my grades are worse and i love school less and my health is definitely fucking worse but lets face it. i’m from a family that has plenty disposable income and im a minority but not the most oppressed by any measure and im a woman in the best time to live as one and im not straight but my experience is limited to a person who came out as a trans man and i should not be as fucked up as i am. i think i have some complex about not spending money on myself bc i dont think it’s the best use of money. i appreciate what im given and i think its less of a money thing and more of a do i deserve good things complex

no clue how to write a conclusion in an essay and no clue how to write one here. happy new year folks

[gottlem]

you belong with me (gigi x crystal)

a/n - some of this isnt proofread so im SORRY if it gets messy at the end it is literally 3am. also this is my first fic so pls be kind i dont know what im doing like at all. (also keep a look at for slight jackie x jan) this was inspired by someone wanting a fanfic based off of you belong with me by taylor swift and i loved the idea so here we are and i am sorry.

-----

Gigi and Crystal are best friends. Growing up living so close to each other made them an absolute power-duo, for years on end they have been inseparable at all times. When they were younger, Gigi would sleep over at Crystals every single weekend and neither of them would ever get sick of eachother. They spent their nights giggling at nothing and making pinky promises “to never ever not be friends” and that they would be each other's “favourite person” forever, because they didn’t know that life can get a tad bit more… complicated when you start to get a little older. Living in ignorant bliss of the impending doom of high school, they would spend their time in their own little bubble, making the most of each other's company. In their minds, it wasn’t a question whether or not they loved each other. The answer was there without even having to ask the question, but of course they were too young to fully understand anyway.

In her early teens, Crystal would slowly realise that if young Gigi and Crystal were a boy and a girl, everyone would have joked about them being together with them being so close, but since they had been two little girls, they were just best friends in everyone’s eyes. Crystal would also slowly realise that ‘just best friends’ isn’t really where she wanted to stay with Gigi, but that truth wouldn’t come for another few years. She learned about the term ‘lesbian’ when there was a rumour in the 7th grade that she was one. It hadn’t fully occurred to her that girls could like girls in that way, but when she did google what it meant on a random wednesday night, it seemed so obvious. Natural. Of COURSE girls can like girls, they’re so pretty! Needless to say, it didn’t take her very long to understand that maybe the rumour was actually true- but nobody needed to know that. Not even Gigi. Definitely not Gigi. To be honest, she didn’t know where her friend even stood on topics like this, but they had never even talked about boys, so she absolutely didn’t want to risk bringing up girls. 

In 7th grade, Gigi already knew what a lesbian was. She heard talks about her best friend being into girls, but she paid it no mind. If Crystal was gay, she’d tell her, right? Gigi could be trusted with that kind of stuff. Either way, she wouldn’t bring it up. Maybe Crystal hadn’t even heard about it, maybe she was completely oblivious. Yeah. That must be it. It was around this time Gigi realised she herself might like girls. But it had nothing to do with Crystal. Nothing at all. In fact, the topic of relationships had never even come up between them. In 8th grade, Gigi started to get little crushes, exclusively on girls. This was the year she decided she was a lesbian. By then, the rumours about Crystal were long forgotten, but her friend’s sexuality was almost always in the back of Gigi’s mind. Crystal had never expressed interest in boys (or girls for that matter), but then again neither had Gigi. She knew she would have to come out to Crystal at some point - there was no WAY she was hiding a future girlfriend from her best friend. 

One night in the summer before 9th grade, Gigi slept over at Crystal’s house. Just like old times, except now both girls had quite a big secret they were hiding from each other, completely unbeknownst to the fact that it was the exact same secret. Gigi was going to tell her by the end of the night. She was SURE of it. The hours passed like minutes and before the girls knew it, the sun had completely set outside and the moon shone down into Crystal’s brightly coloured bedroom (some would think it’s decor is all over the place, but Gigi would describe it as being perfectly Crystal). The pair had settled into a slow, but somehow not very sleepy conversation despite the time, by around 1am. If Gigi was going to tell her, it was now or never. Before she could change her mind, Gigi had looked Crystal in the eye and started with “I really need to tell you something”. She had rambled on about how much she trusted Crystal, and how much she wanted her to accept this. Crystal didn’t have any idea what Gigi could possibly be leading up to, but she did absoluetly not expect to hear “I’m gay, Crys” coming from her friend’s mouth at 1 in the morning. 

The confession left Crystal speechless. Of course she didn’t judge Gigi, she was gay too! She was just shocked. How long had Gigi known? How long have they both known and didn’t tell eachother? It took Gigi’s tearful eyes and furrowed brows to tear Crystal out of her overthinking. Shit. She hadn’t even responded. 

“Crystal. Are you mad? Oh my god you’re mad aren’t you? Or like weirded out? I can go if you want. I get if you’re like uncomfortable with me staying over now-”

“Gi”

“-I don’t have to sleep in  your room. I’m sorry I told you. We never talk about this kind of stuff why did I think telling you would be ok? I-”

“Gigi!” Crystal shook Gigi’s shoulders to get her attention. Her eyes were bloodshot and Crystal cursed her brain for short circuiting when it did. She knew she had to tell Gigi now. 

“Me too” her voice came out as a whisper, but it cut through the silence of the room with ease. It was Gigi’s turn to be stunned into silence. Neither of the girls said anything. Crystal just hugged her friend. She didn’t stop until they woke up in the morning. That week, Crystal let her eyes linger on her friend a little longer than normal every time they passed each other at school. She found herself re-typing text messages and doing anything to speak to Gigi. She knew what all this meant, but she would not tell Gigi. It was  just a little crush. Everybody gets little crushes.

10th grade rolls around far too quickly than anyone would like to accept. Gigi and Crystal are as close as ever. Well, as close as ‘just friends’ can be, much to Crystal’s (hidden) dismay. Jan and Jackie, who had become very good friends with the pair in 9th grade, would constantly tease Crystal about her not-so-small-anymore crush on Gigi when the other girl wasn’t looking. Of course, Crystal hadn’t told them, but it wasn’t necessarily difficult for the couple to figure it out when she would stare at Gigi every chance she got. The teasing only got more painful about a month into 10th grade, when Gigi started dating the new student, Nicky. Suddenly, Crystal felt herself become awkward around her best friend - someone she used to feel so free with. It was easier to pretend she wasn’t falling in love with her when she was single. But now, now she had someone to be jealous of. Someone to remind her that clearly she’s just not good enough for Gigi. Every now and again, Gigi wouldn’t show up to their usual lunch table, leaving Crystal to third wheel with Jan and Jackie. On these days, Crystal didn’t bother looking for Gigi, she knew who she was with, and frankly she couldn’t bear to see them together. When she first saw the couple kiss, it made her stomach drop. Gigi was waiting for the bus when her friend sat next to her and made easy conversation. They were smiling and laughing until Nicky’s car (because of course she could drive) came to pick Gigi up. When she got in the car, the couple shared a moment far too intimate for Crystal’s liking. She pried her eyes away until she heard the car leave.

By Winter break, Gigi and Nicky had been dating for three months. Crystal wasn’t very familiar with how their relationship was going - she knew it would only hurt her if she always asked Gigi about it. If Gigi wanted to talk to her about it, she would bring it up, and apparently Gigi really didn’t want to talk to her about it. Crystal was fine with this. Well, Crystal was fine with this until there was a knock on her door at 11:58pm on a December night coming from the one and only Gigi Goode. Who was crying. Like, really crying. Crystal took the girl's hand and rushed her to her room, sitting her on the bed they had shared (platonically!!!!) many times before. She let her cry. Crystal had learned in her 16 years of life that sometimes, you just gotta cry. Still, the sight of her friend sobbing so much wasn’t an easy one to digest, nor was it one she had seen often. 

After god only knows how long, Gigi’s cries had died down, she was in Crystal’s pyjamas (which Crystal thought was too much for her brain to handle right now, but considering the situation she pushed these thoughts the the back of her mind, as if she hadn’t tried that for the past year anyway) and she was holding a glass of ice water between both hands. It was Crystal who broke the silence. 

“What’s up?” She was quiet, scared that speaking too loudly would cause the fragile girl infront of her to break down again. But she didn’t. Her brows furrowed and she had a look on her face that Crystal couldn’t quite place, something she wasn’t used to by any means after being friends for a good ten years now. 

“It’s nothing. Me and Nicky just had an argument”

“And this is why you came to my house in hysterics in the middle of the night in Winter. Ok, sure.” She deadpans. Gigi gave her a look as if to say ‘you bitch’ but there’s a fondness behind it nonetheless. 

“Ok fine. It’s more than nothing. It feels like all we ever do is argue anymore. We do like, two things; we argue or we mess around, yknow? And I’m kind of sick of it! It’s like I’m here for her to make out with and that’s all that we have going for us. That’s the only good thing. And shouldn’t there be more? Shouldn’t there be romance, and dates and shouldn’t we be able to be stupid in front of eachother and-” She started to cry again, though not as intense as before, definitely enough to stop her little rant. Crystal thought it was for the better, if she heard anymore of that she might start crying herself. She could give Gigi all of that. Hell, she already did for the most part.

Crystal was torn. She wanted to tell Gigi she should break up with Nicky. She knew it would be for the better, for both of them, but she still felt like it would be selfish of her to give that advice. She didn’t want to accidentally take advantage of Gigi, with her being in such a vulnerable space. So she tells Gigi the facts - well, she didn’t really have much (or any) experience so they could be completely false, but to her they seemed quite solid.

“Couples have honeymoon phases. They can’t keep their hands off each other because they’re so obsessed with this new person they have all to themselves and people get carried away. It’s human nature. But that dies down, or it should. Eventually. Couples argue. It’s healthy to disagree and make up every now and again but there comes a point where it’s just too much. I think you know where that point is. I can’t make it up for you, it’s not my relationship, babe” Crystal let the pet name slip without thinking too much about it. She was tired and it was a school night, and her friend was upset. She told herself it meant nothing. Gigi hugged her and fell asleep quite quickly, exhausted from her emotions having taken over.

Nicky was beautiful. Drop dead gorgeous. Painfully stunning. This was a fact, this was understood by boys and girls alike, gay straight or bi. Gigi was lucky to have her, or maybe she wasn’t. Crystal didn’t know anymore. She could see why Gigi had clearly fallen so hard for the french girl, with her fashion forward style and her thick accent that Crystal had no option to admit was just plain sexy. Again, this was all fact. Gigi was also beautiful. That’s why everyone loved them together. Aesthetically, their relationship just worked. But Crystal had a tear stained pillow and a broken girl to prove that aesthetics mean nothing unless there’s love there too. And Crystal loves Gigi. She always has, and probably always will. Crystal didn’t like Nicky. She didn’t like the knowing glares she would get as they passed each other in the hall. It was as if the french girl could read her damn mind and she didn’t like it one bit. It wound her up to no end. She also didn’t like how she would argue with Gigi until she would cry and cry and run to Crystal’s house, sobbing into her pillow. It became routine. The pillow was pushed to the side, specifically for when Gigi came to cry her mascara onto it. Nicky would always apologise the next day. Gigi would always accept it. Crystal felt more and more hopeless.

A few months later, the routine continues. Gigi sends Crystal a text one night in February at around midnight, to say she’s coming over (a new-ish development in the all too familiar routine) and Crystal prepares the signature glass of water and the tear-soaked pillow for her friend. When she opens the door after Gigi’s knocking, she is met with no tears. Actually, she is met with a smile. Crystal just stands there. Gigi walks casually up the staircase and into Crystal’s bedroom, taking the glass of water and sitting cross-legged on her bed, hugging the pillow, but not for emotional support - because it's just comfier. Crystal follows her, a million questions on the tip of her tongue. She sits opposite to Gigi.

“I broke up with Nicky”

Oh.

OH.

“Just now? Oh my god, are you ok?” Crystal hears herself replying before she even knows what to say, she’s glad she didn’t say something stupid.

“No actually, I broke up with her this morning. I was talking to Jan and Jackie about it earlier, but you weren’t there. Plus, I wanted to tell you like this anyways. Here. Feels like tradition. Like it’s come full circle.”

“Are you sure you’re ok though?” It’s honestly creepy to see Gigi so calm over Nicky, after all the tears she had spilled before.

“Yeah. I think it truly ended a long time ago.”

“Oh.”

It’s silent. Crystal feels tense. Like there’s something else to be said, like something else is going to happen. And she’s right. Because when she looks up, Gigi is staring at her, pupils wide and ears red. Crystal feels like she’s under a microscope. A breath gets stuck in her throat. Gigi giggles at it. She giggles and she inches forward. She inches forward and lifts her hands. She lifts her hands to Crystal’s face. And they’re kissing. They’re kissing and Crystal is smiling. When they pull away, Gigi has plump lips and a dumb smile on her face. Crystal loves it. They sit there for a minute, just staring at each other. Letting each other give the moment a second to sink in. When it does, they laugh. And then they talk about it. And then they kiss some more. And then they fall asleep. So what if it took Gigi a bad relationship to see what was standing right infront of her? Now they have each other, and that isn’t going to change.

[gabrielitas]

OK HERE ARE MORE SLIDES HSHSGA

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/109uK-q-OktPBmv8JF-uDD9HJkq0fnmn6w3yRN8PnGVY/edit

kindly ignore the "people we know" section, i made this for a presentation party

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/16Lg7vWr0cCqq9xNzDlGtt1BV5dINGs0Wj8oFjeqL8qQ/edit

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/12ywRhPHnf4SqGfKkZfE6dDNQz5fDiC3KMXq_Dtjt8r4/edit

https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1-ty_5cSKcJTQmzyX19y-BOBlkG369XVTQCgogQD3WZk/edit

onto your questions!

- i indeed to band!! i play clarinet, but we have a marching season coming up so i was at percussion rehearsal. i’m one of the new drum majors for my band (so i conduct the show/im 2nd in line to the director). i’m my free time i fuck around with the ukulele and guitar. im not great but it calms me down.

are you in band?? it's so much fun dbsbsbs!! when the event ends we have to keep in touch (even if it's just to share shitty pics of me in a uniform)

1) i read svt as seventeen! it's really funny though because i don't read skz as "stray kids", i read it as "skizz" fbsbsbshja

2) i'd rather never meet them and b able to consume their content!! i've made it this far already :))

what are your answers to those two??

some sleepover questions!!

1) do you have any movie or tv show recs?? i've been watching buzzfeed unsolved and criminal minds on repeat and it's getting to me 🙄🙄 i plan on watching vip, the one about the north korean officials son, and the wind rises

2) do you have any funny school trip/ band (if your in it) stories? i have quite a few band related ones if you wanna hear them

3) where do you live (this is not supposed to be creepy). i’m from new jersey!! (we might have talked about this but i have a brain the size of a pea

4) what grade are you going into/ are you currently in. i’m gonna b a junior and i am NOT ready for it 😩😩 it's so scary

girl i have no good sleepover questions 🙄🙄 all i do at sleepovers is reenact fanfiction, watch movies, and gossip 😩

if you want gossip from new jersey -> i got drum major over a guy who's harassed me, my sister, and at least 3 of my friends and i’m so happy!! it felt so good to finally have a win 🤤🤤

ooo i’ll check out the slides later!! (i’m babysitting rn lol)

omg i don’t do band and can’t play any instruments, but i’m so jealous of ppl who do!😫 like,, u can just make music! that’s so cool!! and yes we *absolutely* have to keep in touch after the event!! (i would love to see pictures of u in ur uniform alsnksjsks)

ok so i read “ess vee tee” and ya i’d also choose consume content and never meet them, i mean,,, i’m a fan of the content so it just wouldn’t work for me to not consume it anymore lol

ok so for ur questions:

1) ok first of all i love buzzfeed unsolved!! in honor of them ending the series ive been rewatching all of it too lol (i just got to the iconic goatman episode) but i’d recommend downton abbey (i’m only on season four but i’ve rlly been enjoying it) and i’m currently making my way through disney’s tv adaptation of this book series i rlly loved in like,, late middle school-ish? it’s called the mysterious benedict society and the way they’re making the tv show feels so much like the book i rlly love it

2)uhhh so i don’t have any band stories (obvs lol) but i did dye my hair for the first time (well the first time i permanently dyed it) at midnight in the girls locker room? so i go to a rlly small jewish day school, and on the first night of hanukkah they do this thing where all the girls in the high school get to sleep over and light the candles for the first night and then watch movies and wtv and sleep in the not heated gym (and then wake up to pray and go to classes because hanukkah started the day before winter break that year and so we had to actually go to classes the next day🙄) but i had brought hair dye with me so two friends and i (shoutout to @eb4 for being one of those friends and seeing the chaos firsthand shakhskahs) left during the movie (it was parent trap so i almost stayed lol) and went down to the girls locker room and busted out the hair dye! we had to dye it in the sink cuz the school showers r 🤢 and don’t have curtains and i was already in my pajamas. so then an hour later we washed off the dye in the sink and voila! it was box black hair dye and my natural hair is rlly dark brown so it wasn’t like i was dying my hair some crazy color like the blue i have now) i for sure have other stories if u wanna hear them and i’d love to hear some band stories!☺️

3)omg it’s not creepy dw 😂 and i live in massachusetts! also i didn’t know that u live in jersey!! (ok so these two kids who joined my grade this past year r from jersey and they’re so chaotic and i get very similar vibes from u and now i’m wondering if it’s just a jersey thing sksnsjs)

4)girl i’m gonna b a junior too!! and OMG TELL ME ABT IT IM ALREADY AT SCHOOL FOR NINE HOURS A DAY AND HAVE SO MUCH HW AND THIS YEAR IM TAKING AN AP AND SELF STUDYING FOR ANOTHER IM NOT BUILT FOR THIS SKANSNAJ😭😭

omg re-enacting fanfic sounds like such a fun thing to do at a sleepover!! i only have one friend who reads fanfic and we were in seperate fandoms before covid so no fanfic re-enactments for me😔 i’ll def b putting that in my back pocket for when sleepovers r finally a thing again sjhshaha

aaaa that’s so awesome for u!!! i’m not quite sure what that means but u won and that’s always an awesome feeling!!❤️

ok now for my questions:

1) do *u* have any band/school stories???

2) do u do any extracurriculars other than band?

3) ok i know u told me u have a sister but is she younger or older? (lemme predict real quick….💭💭ur the younger one!)

4) what’ve u been doing so far over the summer?

5) shaniac or boogara?? (or shitfish lol)

i hope u have a good night and am sending u tons and tons of love!!❤️❤️

[deardes24]

My Coming Out Story.

I was a little girl maybe five years old if not younger when I started feeling weird about or around girls. I use to grow up in the hood on a block called Elliot on the South Side. My Grandmother was well known and helped run a town cheerleading squad called the “Divas” with the help of other moms on the block. I was one of the youngest on the team but I was highly favored. Some of the teammates were always together and playing outside. One day we were playing manhunt and my older cousin Ramona had to watch me. I remember running and hiding and in the process I saw two of the girls on the fire escape on the back of a building kiss and I couldn’t get the image out of my head. In fact I think I might’ve been a little jealous. - Then there was other little things that I can remember from my childhood that happened and made me sure that I was into girls. In kindergarten there was this girl who always use to smile at me and showed me her cartoon underwear and yeah that was a bit weird. I had a life size barbie doll that I use to pretend was my girlfriend. I had a close family friend who I loved as a friend and loved more than a friend her name was Monica. I tried to kiss her once and she told on me. That was quite embarrassing. Oh and how can I forget the time I was in Summer Camp and got pulled into the office for making other girls “feel uncomfortable”. How? Im not too sure how a seven year old girl makes other girls feel uncomfortable at summer camp. Granted, it was a Christian Camp, so theres that. - Last but not least there was the “Westhab Beating”.  My mother, sister, and I lived in a shelter when I was maybe 9-10 years old. There use to be this brother and sister who lived in the apartments on top of ours. They were much older than me. The sister tried to kiss me once and because i refused to she told my mom and my mom beat my ass. That was the first, worst, and last time I have ever got hit by my mom in my life. 

FAST FORWAD. 

Im in middle school in 7th grade specifically. I had a friend named Karina and boy was she beautiful. We weren’t super close or anything but we did talk here and there. One day we were texting and she asked me if I have ever heard the term “Bisexual” and at the time no, no i did not. She told me that she wanted to explore it and asked if thats something I would be interested in. Mind you I had no idea what that meant really but once she said its like dating boys and girls I said sure. She was my first girlfriend and I swore I was in love but it felt natural and I was happy. We were mainly just a middle school relationship. ( You know how that goes). I only saw her at school and we texted 24/7. I probably hung out with her two-three times out of school, of course we were a secret so i was just the “best friend”. Our first kiss was in my bedroom and it swept me off my feet lol I was so nervous But that didn’t last too long obviously. She eventually went back to guys and there I was confused on what to do. 

- Then I met my first REAL girlfriend. Jasmin Alvarado. We met May 29, 2011. Her father was my sisters baseball coach. I have never been to an of my sisters games before but her team was throwing a BBQ which I was dragged to btw. The only reason i sucked it up was because 1.Food and 2. My cousin Noah was coming. So there I was at this BBQ and i see this girl who seems cocky but friendly. She asked if I wanted to play a gam of volleyball with her but little did i know she was this all star Volleyball Player and I was average. We played two games the first was 10-6 and the second 10-8. I couldn’t stop thinking about her, I wanted to get to know her I was hooked. Her and I dated and we were so in love. But i fucked that up (but thats another story for another time).  We decided to tell our parents. I felt as though we should tell her dad first. I was so scared and nervous. I will never forget his response when we told him. He said “She’s not my son in law she’s my daughter in law and i’m happy if you two are happy” and that he loves us. Now it was my turn. Instead of telling my mom I told my aunt who then responded after i told her i was gay with “duh, i know”. Which wasn’t the answer i was looking for but I took it. My “just a phase” became my reality. 

Today I am Proud. I know who I am. I know that theres no love greater than the other because Love is Love. <3

[kaisooficrec]

Hey! Thank you so much for this blog, I love it a lot. I wanted to know if there's any new pining kaisoo out there? Also any new teachers au?

Hii~ thank you so much for supporting our blog, we love YOU!! pining is always a win and we all love it! here’s what I got for you today, hope you enjoy and don’t forget to leave kudos&comments to the authors!

A Different Morning - this is everything!! college au, friends to lovers au, jongin is a vlogger and ksoo is his bff, he has been pining for the other for so long, and one day, he starts to think his wish might come true

Push the Pedal Down - kaisoo are in a boarding school and decide to run away for a weekend. they have been pining for each other basically ever since they met. ksoo is kind of a bad boy, but not really? i love this fic too much for my own good, seriously.

there are no wrong mistakes - love love love!!! college au w nerdy and introvert ksoo, he rooms w sehun who’s best friend is ofc nini! kaisoo like each other but oh boy it takes a while for the message to get through

kiss me once, kiss me twice (kiss me once again) - fashion industry au! kaisoo are childhood best friends and ksoo likes to wear dresses and skirts ever since he’s young, and jongin supports him w his hobby. they’re separated when they get older bc jongin leaves abroad and creates a fashion brand, but their fates will get intertwined again when nini returns to korea~

Wailing Roses - ksoo is a vampire (and has braces!!!) who jongin has had a crush on for years, and he’s not very approachable, but jongin is persistent

you look like a movie, you sound like a song - to all the boys i’ve loved before au!! with the author’s special touch :’) rly cute fic

Puppy Love - the cutest vet fic!! but also the sexiest!! ksoo is the vet and nini always volunteers at the shelter ksoo works at (partly bc he has a crush on him), while he’s a bartender at night. one night ksoo goes to the strip club jongin works in aaaaand, sexy times.

Love From Last Night - damn this fic is so good! nini is an actor and ksoo owns a bookstore, they meet in a club have a one night stand, however nini goes in ksoo’s bookstore a few days later and they recognize each other~

Birthday Roulette - it’s jongin’s bday and he tricked the roulette to make sure he gets to make out w ksoo hehe

from here to beyond - space au! ksoo are best buddies but like each other, some action thrown in there too! 

You times infinite - college + vampires au, ksoo dies and turns into a vampire and he tries to deal with his new self as well as his crush on jongin

Signal Lost (& Found) - i love soulmates au so much ugh,, nini thinks he’s found his soulmate but has a crush on the cute barista and doesn’t know what to do, until he finds out the TRUTH

What We Find - my HEART, HURTS. another soulmates au, they find each other soon enough but one of them doesn’t want anything to do with the other, but life continues to go on and even though they really don’t want to, they can’t help but gravitate around each other

Flawless - ongoing, ksoo is a crossdresser and gets harsh criticism from people around him for it, jongin is an aspiring journalist who wants to interview ksoo because he finds him interesting, things don’t go as planned

In the Middle, Between Right and Left - (ongoing) slice of life + teachers au, kaisoo have an unresolved past together, they meet years after leaving each other behind as colleagues in a new town

just like picket fences - college au + wolf au, childhood best friends and now roommies, jongin doesn’t realize he likes ksoo until he starts getting jealous

Criminally Romantic - college au, jongin is a dancer and ksoo’s #1 fanboy. ksoo writes crime novels

Supposedly Not a Love Story - ceo + arranged marriage au, ceo!nini asks his secretary ksoo to marry him to get rid of his girlfriend and ksoo says yes to satisfy his crush on his boss

within the flowers of a garden - royalty au, ksoo visits his cousin’s kingdom and meets a beautiful dancer that he instantly likes, and longs after him even after he returns to his own kingdom

100 Kisses - oblivious idiots uwu. jongin is jealous that ksoo has to practice kissing for the kiss scene in his upcoming drama

game of love - jenkai au, ksoo likes jongin but he loves someone else, and made his choice 

Continuity Doesn’t Exist - my favvv! vampire & monsters au, ksoo is the only human between five monsters and sometimes life is hard, especially when you’re in love with your best friend who turned into a vampire not too long ago

Forfiet - set in the 2000s, they get stuck in a supermarket and feelings get revealed

A Slice of Summer Love - college au + pizza delivery guy au! ksoo delivers pizza and is jongin’s favorite delivery boy :) which is not good for his wallet

high tides - korean war au, enemies to friends to lovers, they meet during the war n fall in love, but it’s not that easy

Without Measure - kaibaeksoo n wolf au, kaisoo are best friends but have a messy history, and baekhyun just wants both of them to be happy again (with him too)

Jongin Has A Tattoo - they were married but got into an accident, and jongin just wants his husband to remember him

The Knot Box® - im in love with this fic, literally. wolf au w a/b/o dynamics, they’re mates but meet when jongin is fairly young and don’t realize their connection, but when jongin does, he longs for the only alpha who treats him right

Take My Virgin Sacrifice - incubus au, kyungsoo gets summoned by people playing with the ouija board n forms a weird obsession with jongin

Cafe Eau Laid - cafe au + wolf au! nini is a barista who has a crush on this cute omega who comes in often but assumes that he has a boyfriend

Close To Home - jongin is on a quest to find the most pleasing dick in the universe w his best friend kyungsoo always by his side on his journey. the mutual pining is rEAL (also they’re soulmates)

unpredictable - so cute ;; they like each other but won’t confess and keep complaining that they’d like a boyfriend to give the other hints

Amidst Antenuptials and Elevator Kisses - legendary!!! arranged marriage au, but amidst the small fights, they want each other

Older pining requests can be found here! 

- Admin Macaroon

[jackymedan]

soooo hypothetically....if one wanted to get into mfu fic....what would be a good place to start/some beginner fic recs? ;)

Ok so I’m still not actually sure which fics would technically be the best place to start especially since you told me in the IM that you haven’t actually seen the show itself yet.. but I’m just gonna list some of my personaly favourites kinda sorted by a few categories? this might end up being way too long, sorry in advance :’)

one small disclaimer: I’ve mostly pulled these from my ao3 bookmarks and/or fic rec tag and some of them have been months/years since I last read them so I don’t always 100% know all the details and tropes etc anymore, just that I enjoyed reading them enough to save them somewhere? I think they’re probably all first time fics because that has my preference over established relationship, so just a heads up for that.. anyway- let’s start with the list:

I’ll start with some fics that are still kind of close to canon as far as I remember and kinda plotty and long-ish and really good and funny:

Finders Keepers - Taliesin(This one is hilarious, things you need to know beforehand for this are: Thrush is the name of the organisation behind the bad guys in a lot of the episodes and they also play a role in this fic I think)

The Ties That Bind - Taliesin(I love this one because Illya and Napoleon spend basicall the whole fic chained to each other with handcuffs while being on the run from -again- Thrush, and it gets them into a lot of funny and awkward situations)

and then there’s one that’s also long and plotty from what I remember that has the character played by william shatner in it as well, it gets pretty angsty at some point though but it does have a happy ending (otherwise I wouldn’t have liked it myself) like I mentioned it’s the first long mfu fic I read myself but idk if it’s necessarily the best one to start out with, but I’m including it anyway: - The Locust Affair - LadyRa

You mentioned you liked multilingualism or fics involving language and since Illya is Russian (but there’s also evidence suggesting he grew up in the Ukraine) there’s definitely fics out there that deal with that, here’s two I really like a lot:

The Truth Shall Set You Free - Orockthro(I really recommend keeping google translate open in another tab while reading this one because there’s some Ukrainian in it that doesn’t get translated in the fic itself but google helps a lot and some of the things he says are really funny.)

Lessons - fallingintodivinity(Napoleon asks Illya to teach him some Russian)

Then there’s this other genre which is kind of a big favourite of mine which on the one hand might be perfect for people who haven’t seen the show because they basically take place BEFORE canon… which are fics that describe how Illya and Napoleon might have met for the first time or first started working together.. since canon itself literally doesn’t say anything about how that happened, fanon could go kind of wild with that.. some of them contain a kind of popular fanon theory that Illya originally started out working in the labs (creating gadgets etc) instead of in the field, this isn’t really proven nor disproven by canon but I kind of like it:

The Better Gadget Affair - LadyRa(This is basically my all time favourite go-to fic to reread 3456 times so it really needed to be on this list no matter what, it’s A+++)

Waging World Peace - Alex51324(this is an author who also wrote AMAZING things for due south - including the were otter fic (!!!) which- if you haven’t read that, please do- so yeah- great writer overall, this fic does deal a bit more with the tensions of the cold war etc than the show itself ever did iirc, but I loved it a lot)

The Big Wheel Affair - Garonne(Napoleon meets Illya in VIenna, has a one night stand with him and then has to work a whole case together unexpectedly :’)

And then there’s a couple of more light hearted fics I just need to mention that fill me with glee, they don’t necessarily fit any of the tropes you mentioned in the IMs but *muffled screaming*, a lot of them are by @truthanddivinity whose fics I recommend a lot anyway, but here’s some specific ones:

All You Need is Love (And Chocolate Cake) - fallingintodivinity(this is basically Illya/food heaven, idk if that’s your thing but it really is my thing a lot and this is a whole fic of napoleon cooking for illya and ahdjksjdkfjh and really well written)

The Mysterious Date Affair - fallingintodivinity(Napoleon gets jealous because he THINKS illya has a date)

Summer Holiday - fallingintodivinity(Napoleon and Illya go on holiday together, but Napoleon accidentally booked a trip to a “romantic getaway” for gay couples- then they also run into Thrush guys, hilarity ensues)

Your Lips, Your Lips (I Could Kiss Them All Day if You’d Let Me)- fallingintodivinity(5 times + 1 format, lots of kissing in the line of duty ;))

The Inappropriate Amusement Affair - trinityofone(Also a fic about kissing in the line of duty but in this one Napoleon keeps getting the giggles in the middle of it and he doesn’t know why)

Another one by LadyRa that I liked is a honey trap fic (idk if that’s your thing) where Illya has to seduce a guy to get information and Napoleon gets all jealous about it, again not sure if it’s quite what you’re looking for at this time but including it anyway: - The Let’s Get Friendly Affair - LadyRa

And there’s also another Taliesin fic I think I liked but I don’t remember much about, but I’m adding it because idk (I think at some point they get accused of being gay by some homophobic coworker and they handle it in a really funny way): “I Took It For A Faery Vision” or The Forbidden Fruits Affair- Taliesin

this post is probably long enough at this point, I hope there’s something in here that you like :)) I got a bit carried away lol

*A lot of fics are have titles along the lines of “the (…) Affair” because that’s the format basically every episode title of the show itself follows

[kiicn-blog]

did you hear about the monaco trip? it’s legendary at ucla. KIAN KANG is going, i’m so jealous. their instagram makes it seem like they’re pretty dynamic and they’re all about “do what you do best” & texts left on read. can you believe they’re only twenty-three and they’re going on a free trip to monaco for the summer? hopefully they don’t let their aloof side show too much on the trip. • HAS FIVE SIBLINGS • BROKE UP WITH PARTNER OF THREE YEARS TWO MONTHS AGO

uh henlo, quick intro before i disappear for the evening and write my second paper :( you won't see me till like tuesday :(( afternoon :( after class :(( anyways LMAO i'm aye ! i am twenty three :/ she/her pronouns and in the est timezone ! if u haven't already added me, add me on discord new girl could be the 1 for me#8402 , some of u added me and didnt come say hi so i hOPE after u read this u hit me up :( bc . i rly dont kno who is who tht added me JKFMGDSG dont be shy i do not bite :DDD

okay ima keep this fairly simple, let's start w stats ! 

full name: kian kang, no middle name, call him kk haha nickname(s): kiki, k, ki, do not call him ian he won't ever talk to you again, respect his vegan white ass name age: 23. date of birth: november 2nd 1995. hometown: new york, new york. ethnicity: korean. gender: cis male. sexuality: bisexual. hair colour: black. eye colour: brown. height: 5'11. tattoos: has a tattoo of a lion on his right index finger and a tiny heart behind his left ear. piercings: ears, three on the right, two on the left.

okay quick background ! im not gna write a lot and keep it brief bc ive been writing for school and my brain is DEAD i dnt have the mindset to go into depth bout anything but if u wnna know anything else just ask 

kian comes from a well off background like his mom ? a sugar DADDY ! like his dad married into MONEY !

they live in greenwich village in NYC n tht area is so expensive so u can say he had a nice upbringing, went to the best school

anyways ! quick family talk, his dad rly didn't love his mom , and rly only married for money and security and when kian was born he wanted kian to have all the things and opportunities in life that he didnt so he stayed w his mom

n his dad ? gay as FUCK kept tht hidden for god knows how long

it wasnt till kian was like 15 when he was like o ? father thoust r gay huh

yeah so tht marriage ended LMAO and kian wasnt rly happy that his family broke up

at the wedding when they asked does anyone object ? he stood up and said ME bitch but he was joking but he wasnt joking he was serious , u can say hes .. happy .

he has two siblings, they're still babies, twins, they're like 12 thats baby ok he loves his siblings theyre annoying but loves them ! assuming the other three are gna be from the step sibling plot xoxo i can alter this

ok here's a rundown on  kian now

kian , is a very blunt individual like he can be straightforward about a lot of stuff, he doesnt rly sugarcoat his words, it's just how he was raised

sometimes he can come off mean but like it's just.. how he talks and sometimes he doesn't realize what he says is wrong he just says it like this man has never been told to shut up,

he was always favored in school for the way he talked but sometimes tht warranted eyebrows raising left and right but he was still adored for his stupidity and lack of sense

he's an alright kid , can be nice when he wants to be , gentle soul once u rly get past whatever walls he put up

like he doesn't like to show that side as often unless u LOVES u but i feel like he should have air signs in him ..hmm.. will think bout it KFMDG

what am i missing ..

i feel like i missing something,

oh comign from n y of c he's super into looking good, even when he bums it down he looks good, he'll also call u out on ur choices and be like ur wearing tht ? today ? yikes...

if u want an honest opinion he's not afraid to be honest , v brutal xoxo

i think thts it

anyways PLOTS

so. . this is a possible plot ! and im gna base it off the song 'the wall' by anders if u wanna go take a listen teehee anyways, imagine this . it's all lovey dovey for a year and it was going well like over the moon relationship like you almost think these two would have gotten married but then after the year mark, things began to go down the drain? they started to hang out less, fights would break out, sex that would follow the fights but like that's it.. tht was the only intimacy, and sometimes they'd pretend they're okay for a day or two but then have a complete fit over like idk the wrong food order, cheating speculations could have arose and then they really really tried to make it right their third year, trying to go over what went wrong but then they decided to call it quits BUUtt since it's a fresh wound, they could have some slip ups if ukno what i meaaan anyways yeah if u wnna do this xoxo pls be prepared to plot back FKDG

a possible familial relation, like cousin . only cousin really, obv ur chara would have to be korean or half korean but someone who just knows kian inside and out this could be like an angsty familial relationship or a good one

ok another anders based plot ! listen to don't call :)) anyways this one, sometime after his break up he decided to have a few hook ups here and there, meaningless ofc but this specific hook up left a mark on him , maybe by the way they talked to him , he kept coming back for the four second intimacy, it left him confused n dazed , confused bc why am i feelin weird i just had a heartbreak

honestly im just down if anyone just wants to have a simple hook up plot thts cool too no thinking just lmk ! bc he's had a few after his breakup

enemies / ppl who don't get along ? idk kian could have come off COMPLETELY wrong and ur chara could have taken it the wrong way, insults were thrown here and there and they just don't talk with kindness

a sugar baby ! kian got MONEY ! i told u his mom ? a sugar daddy xoxo he doesnt mind spoiling ppl but only one he aint tht generous also u have to build a relationship with him if u want him to spoil u

uh thts it if u have any other plots just lmk xoxo we dont have to just do these

[thisweekingundamwing]

This Week in Gundam Wing 6-12 January 2019

Here’s this week’s roundup!

Remember to give your content creators some love! And join in on the events at the bottom!

~Mod Hel

Fanfiction/Snippets/AU Ideas:

@disturbed02girl​

Postcard #18 https://disturbed02girl.tumblr.com/post/181956488665/postcard-18-heero-is-still-amused-by-duos

Heero is still amused by Duo’s adventures while he travels Earth.

@idkmybffflamingo​

A String of Moments https://archiveofourown.org/works/17381093

Trowa Barton/Chang Wufei/Duo Maxwell/Quatre Raberba Winner/Heero Yuy

Post-Canon, Canon Compliant, Fluff and Humor, Domestic Fluff, Light Angst, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Slice of Life, Preventers, Cooking, Pet Names, Duo Maxwell Swears A Lot, Missions Gone Wrong, Aftermath of Violence, Card Games, Oregon Trail, Quatre Raberba's Uchuu no Kokoro | Space Heart, Anxiety Attacks, Television Watching, Star Trek References, Sleeping Together, Cuddling & Snuggling, Romance, Polyamory

In the years beyond the Eve Wars, the former Gundam pilots have ultimately settled down into an intimate, cohesive unit. Life is a constant whirlwind of happenings, both good and bad, but through it all one thing is certain: no matter the stakes and whatever the challenge, they face it together.

Gundam Wing Holiday Gift Exchange 2018! Gift for @terrablaze514​

@lifeaftermeteor​

Saturday Snippet https://lifeaftermeteor.tumblr.com/post/181963976776/winner-family-compound-l4-v05001-26-december-210

Winner Family Compound

L4-V05001

26 December 210

@noirangetrois​

Snippet Saturday Monday https://noirangetrois.tumblr.com/post/181805037912/snippet-saturday-monday-ive-been-struggling-with

I’ve been struggling with the (many) fics I’m in the middle of, so of course when the writing bug finally bit me, it was for an entirely new fic I’ve been thinking about for a while, but hadn’t yet started to write. My first foray into 3x4, based on my own experiences going to Band Camp growing up. And yes, before you ask, I play the flute. Which works out, given Trowa.

WIP Wednesday https://noirangetrois.tumblr.com/post/181881723387/wip-wednesday

So, anyone remember my fic Of the Sea? The Little Mermaid adaptation with Duo as Ariel and Heero as the prince but with spies and intrigue and such? That I haven’t updated since May due to severe writer’s block? Well, I’ve finally made some progress, so here is a snippet from chapter 6!

Of the Sea (Ch. 6) https://archiveofourown.org/works/12749670/chapters/40950512

Duo Maxwell/Heero Yuy

otp, Yaoi, Eventual Smut, fairytale my way, Meroctopus!Dorothy, Aro!Trowa, more ships on the way, Slow Burn, Multi POV, POV Third Person Limited, merman au, Slash, MerMay, Fantasy Politics, mentions of abuse

Heero Yuy will soon be reaching the age of majority, at which time he will ascend the throne of Wingaria. Before that can happen, though, he must needs choose a bride. But what if there are no good choices? What if someone else has captured his heart?

At long last! I’ve finished another chapter! Woohoo! Hopefully someone will still be interested in a story that hasn’t been updated since last May… until now! An excerpt from this chapter:

They had known that Heero was looking for a bride, and that Mariemaia was one of the two frontrunners - the other being Relena Darlian. What they hadn’t known, however, was how very, very reluctant both Heero and Mariemaia were on the matter. Sure, they both said all the right things, showed the proper courtesies and etiquette, but it was glaringly obvious to Duo that if Heero chose Mariemaia, they would both be miserable. A formidable team, yes, but miserable.

And for some reason, Duo found himself hoping against hope that Heero would choose someone else. To be fair, the mer kingdoms were in agreement that an alliance between Wingaria and the Sanq Kingdom would be more advantageous for them - anything to prevent the chance that Dekim would break faith and allow the secret of the merfolk’s existence to get out - so Duo already had incentive to want a different bride for Heero. But now? Now he wanted it not just for the sake of merkind, but for Heero’s sake as well.

Because not only did Duo have access to the interplay amongst all the players here, he was getting to know Heero Yuy the person, not just Heero Yuy the Prince.

@softnocturne​

You Hold Our Hearts (Ch. 3) https://archiveofourown.org/works/16992327/chapters/40940870

Trowa Barton/Quatre Raberba Winner/Heero Yuy, Lucrezia Noin/Sally Po, Dorothy Catalonia/Relena Peacecraft, Chang Wufei/Duo Maxwell

Quatre Raberba Winner, Trowa Barton, Heero Yuy, Duo Maxwell, Lucrezia Noin, Sally Po, Dorothy Catalonia, Relena Peacecraft, Chang Wufei, Howard, Doctor J, Instructor O, Original Characters

Angst, Smut, Rape/Non-con Elements, Minor Character Death, Missing in Action

It's been a month and still no word about Trowa, until one night.

@vegalume​

The North Road http://vegalume.tumblr.com/post/181961315245/title-the-north-road-author-vega-lume-beta

Pairing 1+2

Cliché, thy name is Vel. Warning, tharr be sap and a smidgen of angst here.

After becoming stranded, Duo finds himself in to company of stranger who soon becomes more.

Gundam Wing Holiday Gift Exchange 2018! Gift for @dthjoey​

Fanart:

@b0mhat​

http://b0mhat.tumblr.com/post/181902104344

Relena Darlian/Peacecraft

@gundayum​

https://gundayum.tumblr.com/post/181945240991/doodles-first-ones-are-the-variants-of-duos-hair

Duo’s hair

https://gundayum.tumblr.com/post/181829172591/its-a-schbeiker-family-selfie-my-work-week-is?is_related_post=1#notes

Schbeiker Family Selfie

https://gundayum.tumblr.com/post/181918342621/ill-probably-go-back-in-a-day-or-so-and-make

Relena, Heero, Quatre, WuFei, Duo, & Trowa

@seitou​

http://seitou.tumblr.com/post/181890766590/alpha-beta-and-omega-the-first-to-the-last

Alpha, Beta, Omega - Heero Yuy

Photosets/Screenshots:

@moonlightsdreaming​

http://moonlightsdreaming.tumblr.com/post/181936363473/endless-favorite-manga-gundam-wing-glory-of-the

Relena - Glory of Losers

Chats/Discussions:

@anaranesindanarie​

https://anaranesindanarie.tumblr.com/post/181889205724/gundam-wing-a-thon

Rane’s commentary over a rewatch of Gundam Wing.

Quotes/Dialogues:

@incorrectgundamwingquotes​

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181761714069/relena-would-you-date-a-guy-thats-shorter-than

Relena, Dorothy, & Zechs

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181799138720/quatre-we-have-a-problem-duo-we-have-so-many

Quatre & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181802087249/sometimes-life-can-be-pretty-good-original

Gif set from “Monsters and Knives” by Katherine Crane

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181820475008/duo-see-this-is-why-i-dont-leave-space-you

Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181826376775/trowa-you-cant-expect-me-to-stab-somebody-on-an

Trowa & Quatre

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181828006979/on-the-lunar-base-heero-if-you-two-can-manage

Heero, WuFei, & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181831520206/wufei-sorry-i-wont-be-able-to-make-it-ive-got

WuFei & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181845735522/this-has-been-haunting-duo-for-over-a-year-he

Quatre, Duo, & Heero

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181862437636/heero-bursting-into-the-room-duo-i-told-relena

Heero & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181865683694/duo-quatre-is-a-sweetheart-you-know-what-he-does

Duo & Quatre

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181866214389/at-preventers-hq-wufei-did-you-have-sex-in

WuFei & Trowa

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181876223927/heero-tall-people-are-the-enemy-zechs-cant

Heero & Zechs

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181887048978/yes-relena-is-very-pretty-but-for-the-love-of

FT Relenas >_>

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181903956101/at-zechs-and-noins-wedding-relena-what-the

Relena, Heero, Duo, WuFei, & Quatre

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181914560287/trowa-i-love-you-quatre-i-love-you-more

Trowa & Quatre

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181930879194/trowa-you-dont-like-to-admit-it-but-if-anyone

Trowa, Heero, & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181936024644/quatre-trowa-god-fucking-dammit-just-take

Quatre & Trowa

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181945213131/trowa-im-not-jealous-i-just-get-this-weird

Trowa & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181957444745/heero-duo-idly-staring-down-at-heero-id-save

Heero & Duo

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181919777349/at-preventers-hq-heero-i-just-killed-a-roach

Heero & WuFei

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181962631398/duo-you-stupid-twink-trowa-im-a-bear-im-a

Duo & Trowa

https://incorrectgundamwingquotes.tumblr.com/post/181970855144/gw-girls-text-posts-vol-1

GW Girls Text Posts Vol. 1

@lemontrash​

https://lemontrash.tumblr.com/post/181866191459/incorrectgundamwingquotes-heero-angry

Heero, WuFei, Quatre, & Duo

A continuation from @incorrectgundamwingquotes​

@noirangetrois​

https://noirangetrois.tumblr.com/post/181847540037/honestly-the-best-part-about-baking-potatoes-is

Dorothy courtesy of @lemontrash​

MoodBoard/Aesthetics:

@softnocturne​

https://softnocturne.tumblr.com/post/181952329775/credit-images-from-weheartittumblr

3X4 Aesthetic

No Idea What To Put This Under:

@lemontrash​

https://lemontrash.tumblr.com/post/181948049974/radio-meteor-episode-2-the-gundam-named

Radio Meteor Episode 2

Calendar Events:

@gwcocktailfriday​

Cocktail Fridays!

Post responses on Friday, during Happy Hour between 3 & 5 pm in your own timezone.

Here’s the prompt for Friday January 18th! https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/181951147834/cocktail-friday-post-responses-on-friday-january

For those going to Pillowfort, find us here. https://gwcocktailfriday.tumblr.com/post/181733192168/for-those-transferring-their-focus-to-pillowfort

@our-summer-of-zechs​

Summer of Zechs 2019 Ideas https://our-summer-of-zechs.tumblr.com/post/181628092091/we-appear-to-still-be-up-and-running-folks

Come let us know how long this summer’s event should last!

What Month is it? https://our-summer-of-zechs.tumblr.com/post/181933097036/what-month-is-it

Come vote on a month for the event to be hosted in!

Summer of Zechs will start being run from This Week in Gundam Wing Events on pillowfort as well!

@thisweekingundamevents​

Gundam Wing Holiday Gift Exchange 2018!

Gift Master List! https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/181794816005/gundam-wing-holiday-gift-exchange-2018-master-post

GW Valentine’s Event 2019

https://thisweekingundamevents.tumblr.com/post/181866285330/gw-valentines-event-2019

Schedule:

Sunday January 13th - Saturday January 19th | “Sign-ups”

Sunday January 20th - Saturday February 9th | Make your thing(s)

Sunday February 10th - Saturday February 16th | Post your works

Here’s the Pillowfort discussion.

[10th-no-name-person]

Thanks for the tag @viostormcaller!

Okay’ let’s do this!

A: Age- I’m 21! I’m legal you guys! XD

B: Birthplace- Puerto Rico. My little island that I hold dear to my heart. 💚🇵🇷

C: Current time- it’s 10:45pm

D: Last Drink you had? I’m currently having Coca-Cola Zero Sugar. I can’t believe it taste so similar to the original one!

E: Easiest person to talk to: My tumblr friends! Aka all of you! I’m super shy in person but here I can be myself -hugs everyone-

F: Favorite song- ummmm man that is hard! Right now, “Carnaval del Barrio” from In The Heights by Lin-Manuel Miranda. I love that song! It takes me back to my Christmas tradition and we Latinos stick together during hard times 💚

G: Grossest Memory- ummmm I think when I got food poisoning and ummm I started throwing up and ummm there was straight fucking water coming out of my ummm bottom XD

H: Horror, yes or no? -NO! I get scared too easily! But for some reason I can deal with it when I watch Mark and Jack play them XD

I: In love? YEH!- I have an amazing boyfriend and we are going strong for almost 3 years! 💚

J: jealous of people? -Hell nah! I love supporting my peeps on their journey to succes! 💚

K: keyboard smash choice- ummmm I dunno, I just smash my hand (literally) on my computer keyboard XD but on my phone I guess I keep it on the right side?

L: Love at first sight or should I walk past again?- well, last time I did that ummm it didn’t go so well… so, definitely get to know the person before pouring your heart and soul. BUT THAT DOESNT MEAN IM NOT A HELPLESS ROMANTIC XD

M: Middle Name?- No ;-; I think my family knew that I was going to be the black sheep since everyone in my family has a middle name.

N: Number of siblings?- I have siblings! 2 sisters and 1 brother, I’m the oldest.

O: one wish?- To be able to look in the mirror and love, and be proud of what I see.

P: Person you last called? My mom, she wanted to know how I’ve been doing since last time I called her was on Christmas. And she scolded me for it 😅😅

Q: Question you’re always asked?- If I can say something is Spanish XD look, I know I don’t look Latina, but the fact that when I say I’m Puerto Rican and see people being shook just makes me laugh hahaha

R: Reaction to a compliment- If is with someone I’ve known for ages I go “YOU FUCKING LIAR!” But if it’s someone I’m starting to get to known then I get all shy and I blush and aaaahhh don’t look at me! /).(\

S: Song you last Sang?- ummmm I think it was “Bones” from NateWantsToBattle

T: Time you woke up?- Ummmm I woke up at 6am but then went back to sleep, and then I woke up again at 10am

U: Underwear color- Black 🖤

V: Vacation destination- If it’s winter New York! If it’s summer, I usually go back home (since I currently live in Seattle)

W: Where do you feel safest?- Ummm… well, my grandparents house back in P.R, but… I’m not there anymore, so I’d say my apartment with my boyfriend and roommates

X: X-Rays- not that I can remember. I’ve never broken a bone or anything like that XD

Y: Your favorite food?- OOF! Well, My top would be White Rice and Parmesan Chicken, second sushi, third pasta 💚

Z: Zodiac Sign- TAURUS ♉️

Tagging: @thebluehearted , @pumpkin-demon , @that-ghost-in-the-corner , @picapica916, @weirdmixofweirdness

[uberfluss]

1-97 xoxo

1. What’s your middle name? i forgot i needed one

2. What are you listening to right now? this baby dont cry by K. Flay!

3. What was the last thing you ate? oatmeal

4. Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? my aunt

5. Do you drink? occassionally 

6. Do you smoke? nope

7. What is the first thing you noticed in someone? usually their affect

8. What is your hair color? naturally dark brown currently fire engine red that wont fucking fade

9. What is your eye color? blue green grey 

10. Do you wear contacts/glasses? both

11. Dogs or cats? cats!

12. What’s your favorite animal?cats oscars or ferrets

13. What’s your favorite television show? myth busters or how its made

14. What’s your favorite movie? beetlejuice!!

15. What’s your favorite band/singer? Billie Eilish Grandson Kflay and Mallrat have been the most recent

16. How old are you? i literally dont know half the time

17. Do you have a crush on anyone? not to my knowledge

18. What’s your sexual orientation? bi

19. What’s your favorite color? honestly i think pink

20. What was your most embarrassing moment? i literally dont know 

21. Do you ever wish you were someone else? all the fucking time

22. What were you like when you were a kid? annoying as hell never shut up and never stopped moving

23. What would your dream house be like? a small little apartment that i could safely afford

24. What last made you laugh? shaving cream in a crock

25. What is your favorite word?idt i have one 

26. What is your least favorite word? not sure

27. What turns you on? no

28. What turns you off? someone being a fucking asshat

29. What is your star sign? triple sagittarius

30. What are your favorite books? hunger games, illiad, mary shelly’s frankenstein, les miserables, and donte’s inferno.

31. Do you have any siblings? too many

32. Do you like to dance? only by myself

33. What is your definition of cheating? starting a relationship with no intent to tell your other partner(s)

34. Have you ever cheated on someone? no

35. Do you regret anything? loads

36. Do you have any phobias? driving through farmland gives me anxiety if that counts

37. Ever broken any bones? i’ve only fractured my rib the rest have been just dislocations and subfluxes which are daily occurances 

38. Ever come close to death? we all do

39. What is your religion, if any? a mess

40. Have you ever been to a psychiatrist/therapist? yep currently seeing one

41. Are looks important in a relationship? not really?

42. Are you more like your mom or your dad? hopefully neither

43. What is your favorite season? summer!!!

44. Do you have any tattoos? like 2

45. Do you have any piercings? like 9 hopefully gonna make it 11 soon

46. How many boyfriends/girlfriends have you had? three

47. Have you ever had a crush on a fictional character? lydia deetz when i was like 7 

48. Who is your celebrity crush? winona ryder 

49. Are you a virgin? not answering

50. Do you get jealous easily? i literally cant name a time i’ve been truly jealous

51. What is your favorite type of food? sweets

52. Do you ever want to get married? i see no point in signing a legally binding document that ties me to a person for the foreseeable future. if anything it sounds like really bad dangerous idea.

53. Who was your first kiss with? a girl named maggie in the 6th grade and not the maggie that i post about

54. Have you ever been cheated on? no

55. What is your idea of the perfect date? sitting on a rooftop of a parking garage downtown at night taking photos and enjoying the view of the buildings around eating fries from some fast food place

56. Are you an introvert or an extrovert? extroverted introvert

57. Do you believe in aliens or life on other planets? i wouldn’t be suprised

58. What talent do you wish you’d been born with? a way with words that doesnt make me seem like an asshole half the time

59. What is your saddest memory? when i lost contact with my parter for two and a half years

60. Do you believe in love at first sight? no

61. Do you believe in soul mates? yes

62. Have you ever dyed your hair? all the time

63. Has someone ever spread a nasty rumor about you? no

64. Would you go against your moral code for money? no

65. What are three things most people don’t know about you? 1 i have a kid 2 im partially deaf 3 im in mensa

66. Who are you jealous of? no one really

67. Do you sleep with a stuffed toy? a plush heart from my partner

68. How long was your longest relationship? dont know

69. Is the glass half empty or half full? the glass is half full of air and half full of liquid and therefore completely full

70. What is the sexiest thing someone could ever do for/to you? no

71. Who is your most loyal friend? Maggie Lizard U.

72. Are you in a relationship?  yes

73. If you have a boyfriend/girlfriend, what is your favorite thing about him/her? everything

74. Are you a bad person? it feels like it some days

75. Are you a lover or a fighter? lover

76. What did you do on your last birthday? i dont do anything for my birthday ever

77. What is your favorite quote and why? 

“ there are 7 billion 47 million people on the planetAnd I have the audacity to think I matterI know it's a lie but I prefer it to the alternative”Because you do have to convince yourself there’s value to your life. even if you know deep down there’s nothing because if  you dont you’ll walk down a very dark and dangerous road with only one end. and its not a very pleasant one

78. If your best friend died, what would you do? given she’s the reason im alive i’d probably be completely unable to cope 

79. If you had to go back in time and change one thing, what would it be? i dont even know

80. If you only had 24 hours to live, what would you do? i’d call the people i love and tell them i love them and try to hang out with them if i could

81. What is the strangest dream you’ve ever had? the only dream i can remember is sitting on a curb with maggie playing some jenga like game next to a crashed helicopter surrounded by terrified people with guns and we were just smiling watching a giant giant gaint ship come barreling towards us and i KNew that it was the start of the end of the world. 

82. Are you happier single or in a relationship? i think the same. depends on the relationship.

83. Who were you in a past life? some Victorian bastard

84. What is your happiest childhood memory? driving around around midnight through downtown milwaukee after a death cab concert at the rave

85. Have you ever experienced unrequited love? yes

86. Have you ever had an imaginary friend? no but my sister had an imaginary friend called mr fork taht she never questioned and she thought when she got older he’d turn into mr knife. she didnt like mr fork and she wanted him to leave

87. If you were the president, what would you do? step down

88. What is your ideal career? i plan on going into phsychology and becomning a therapist ideally i want to run a shelter for run-aways or kids that got kicked out that would provide a stable enviroment and gave kids a place to stay as long as needed and if possible get the parents into therapy with those kids and resolve the home conflicts while the kids are still in the care of the shelter to ensure that they’re not mistreated as a result of anything that was said 

89. What is your political affiliation? socialist at minimum

90. Are you conservative or liberal? liberal

91. Is the male or female body closest to perfection? what the hell is perfection??

92. Do you like kissing in public? depends on the place

93. If you could change one thing in the world, what would you change? create healthy equality 

94. Where would you like to live? in the middle of a giant bustling city like new york or hong kong or in a secluded pine forest running on solar pannels and well water and being completely sustainable

95. Where would you go on your dream vacation?

everywhere

96. Describe yourself in one word.

headache

97. Describe yourself in one sentence.

a dumbass who is really trying their hardest and it just doesnt wanna work

[gothicmangos-blog]

Get To Know Me Uncomfortably Well

(This tag was not created by me, it’s by @marcymakemagic​. I wan’t to do it since it seemed fun.)

PLEASE DON’T LET THIS FLOP AHHHH

1. What is your middle name? - Nikole

2. How old are you? - 21

3. When is your birthday? - June 17

4. What is your zodiac sign? - Gemini

5. What is your favorite color? - Army Green

6. What’s your lucky number? - 13 

7. Do you have any pets? - Nope

8. Where are you from? - Missouri, USA 

9. How tall are you? - 5′8″ (172.7 cm)

10. What shoe size are you? - 7.5

11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? - 15 I think

12. What was your last dream about? - I was kissed by Jungkook :]

13. What talents do you have? - drawing, singing, writing lyrics, just being creative.

14. Are you psychic in any way? - Not really, but there’s been times when I’d predict something would happen, or I’d have dreams about something and then it would happen later that week it would happen. I’m also known go be very lucky.

15. Favorite song? - “Ooh La La La” by EXO

16. Favorite movie? - Ride Along is a funny one, but I don’t really think I have a favorite. As long as Kevin Hart is in it, I’m happy.

17. Who would be your ideal partner? - Someone I’m not afraid to be goofy with and treats me like a princess.

18. Do you want children? - Not really. I’m kinda terrible with kids. Now if you mean children as in dogs, then yes, I WANT THEM ALL!!

19. Do you want a church wedding? - I’ll just do whatever feels right, but honestly that’s probably what’ll happen anyways.

20. Are you religious? - Yep

21. Have you ever been to the hospital? - Who hasn’t? I mean we’ve all been born right?? :]

22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? - Nope, I’m an angel

23. Have you ever met any celebrities? - Yes, I met Christina Grimmie 2 years before she passed. The day I met her was one of the best days of my life. R.I.P, love~.

24. Baths or showers? - Showers

25. What color socks are you wearing? - Black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow, black and yellow.

26. Have you ever been famous? - pfffffffffffffttttttt..... no

27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? - Maybe not huge where people are stalking me and paparazzi are everywhere, but a lil fame is alright c:

28. What type of music do you like? - K-Pop, Indie pop, rock, acoustic shit <:

29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? - nope, but maybe it’ll happen someday ;)

30. How many pillows do you sleep with? - 9

31. What position do you usually sleep in? - curled up on my side

32. How big is your house? - 3600 sq ft... i think

33. What do you typically have for breakfast? - nothing... because I don’t wake up till the afternoon.

34. Have you ever fired a gun? - nerf

35. Have you ever tried archery? - I want to

36. Favorite clean word? - Fudge-nuggets or oof

37. Favorite swear word? - dick? Is dick a swearword? Nah? okay then, i don’t have a favorite because I’m an “angel” c;

38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? - 26 hours

39. Do you have any scars? - This past summer I cut my finger on a can of soup and there’s a weird bubble of re-attached skin on my ring finger where it happened. 

40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? - Stalkers? Oh yep, plenty of those.

41. Are you a good liar? - I can’t lie to save a life.

42. Are you a good judge of character? - most of the time.

43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? - English accent, a bit of an oriental accent, pikachu, stitch from lilo and stitch, goofy..

44. Do you have a strong accent? - nope, i don’t even have one.

45. What is your favorite accent? - As long as i can understand you, then that’s good

46. What is your personality type? - sarcastic, funny, lazy, shy sometimes but crazy other times.

47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? - My DAY6 Youth Tour Hoodie.

48. Can you curl your tongue? - Yep, I can turn it upside down and also touch my nose with it too.

49. Are you an innie or an outie? - innie

50. Left or right handed? - Right

51. Are you scared of spiders? - yes

52. Favorite food? - Cake

53. Favorite foreign food? - Korean BBQ and Gyoza (Japanese dumplings).

54. Are you a clean or messy person? - messy tbh

55. Most used phrase? - I’m okay, I’m good, Okie dokie.

56. Most used word? - Oof, hellurr, idk, lmao

57. How long does it take for you to get ready? - like 2 hours lol

58. Do you have much of an ego? - kinda-ishhh. My ego is bigger on the internet.

59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? - suck and lick >__>

60. Do you talk to yourself? - All the time

61. Do you sing to yourself? - I sing what I say to myself cuz im a weirdo

62. Are you a good singer? - I’m aight.

63. Biggest Fear? - Stage fright, airplanes, moths, absolute silence, losing friends and loved ones

64. Are you a gossip? - not really. idc about gossip anymore

65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? - I honestly have no idea.

66. Do you like long or short hair? - both are fine. I prefer long on me though.

67. Can you name all 50 states of America? - yes, and in alphabetical order too.

68. Favorite school subject? - Art, astronomy, photography.

69. Extrovert or Introvert? - depends on the situation, but a little bit of both.

70. Have you ever been scuba diving? - nope

71. What makes you nervous? - confrontation, going places alone, public speaking.

72. Are you scared of the dark? - a bit.

73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? - One of my pet peeves. 

74. Are you ticklish? - please don’t tickle me... it’s torture ;~;

75. Have you ever started a rumor? - nope

76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? - nah

77. Have you ever drank underage? - once

78. Have you ever done drugs? - nope

79. Who was your first real crush? - Andrew from fourth grade

80. How many piercings do you have? - none, except the one in my heart when someone says that they hate BTS.

81. Can you roll your Rs?“ - nope, but my friend can purr and I’m jealous.

82. How fast can you type? - pretty damn fast, thank you very much.

83. How fast can you run? - I don’t

84. What color is your hair? - Brown

85. What color is your eyes? - Grey Blue; sometimes they can be green too.

86. What are you allergic to? - Exercise xD 

87. Do you keep a journal? - Yes, it is dedicated to Kpop c: I’ll show it someday

88. What do your parents do? - dad works at the city waterplant, and mom stays home taking care of my brother, me and my grandmother

89. Do you like your age? - It’s a good age, except I hate responsibility

90. What makes you angry? - Lots of things

91. Do you like your own name? - Yeah it’s fine

92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? - kinda, but for dogs xD

93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? - girl tho

94. What are you strengths? - bowling and being lazy

95. What are your weaknesses? - not eating... don’t want to talk about it

96. How did you get your name? - ... my parents gave it to me?

97. Were your ancestors royalty? - I’m somehow related to Isaac Newton, but he aint royalty.

98. Do you have any scars? - ... I THOUGHT I ALREADY ANSWERED THIS QUESTION?? ABOUT MY BUBBLE FINGER.

99. Color of your bedspread? - Purple and black. 100. Color of your room? - Purple.. 

I PURPLE YOU!!!

Thanks for reading if you did. :*

[moldypieceoflasagna]

36 questions that nobody asked me

(except @lollipoppedchainsaw )

(the 36 questions that lead to love or whatever) https://www.nytimes.com/2015/01/11/fashion/no-37-big-wedding-or-small.html

1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?

I hate going out to dinner so much i probably wouldnt be able to enjoy it properly

2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?

It would be interesting to see what it’s like for a short period of time, but i’d never be able to keep it up; i’d probably have an identity crisis

3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?

yes i have to mentally prepare myself 100% of the time

4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?

hanging out with the people i love is enough to keep me happy for a good while tbh. sitting around doing nothing literally nothing with them is endlessly entertaining to me even though sometimes i might make that hard to believe 

5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?

i sing to myself a lot, not so much to others- although i AM a slut for karaoke

6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?

body because i feel thats probably what old people complain about most. plus like,, 90 years of life knowledge? sounds great to me

7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?

probably an accident that’s almost statistically impossible

8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.

single rn (ladies) but i usually try to find friends with similar music tastes because scream-singing in the car is the most fun one can have

9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?

im most grateful for my dogs and for my friends! i love them and it means the world to me to have people that i can call family. also i would die without my dog juno, she is my rock (and my therapist)

10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?

Not rly how i was raised, but i wish i had a closer relationship with my older siblings. Three of them had moved out before i was rly old enough to not be an asshole child, so most of them still see me as an asshole child and they never take me seriously. im glad i have an alright relationship with them, but that’s kinda all it is and i know i could do better

11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.

Lived in Texas my whole life yeehaw. I have 2 brothers and 2 sisters; 2 of them dont like me, and my relationship with the other 2 is,, certainly not bad. Had a lot of physical and mental illness in the past, but 20gayteen is definitely my year, yeet

12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

either speaking a different language or playing the piano. im very jealous of good piano players, and at some point i need to be able to speak a more useful language than french because so far in texas it’s proved absolutely useless (other than talking to my mom but that doesnt count)

13. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know?

I’d wanna know wtf im supposed to do with my life because sweaty i still have no idea. passion? dont know her please introduce me

14. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?

i wanna go skydiving bitch, no one wants to go with me! pussies!!! the lot of you

15. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?

that one time i did an entire semester’s worth of work in the last three days of the school year

16. What do you value most in a friendship?

being able to put up with my huge fucking mouth. also honesty is super important, even if it’ll make me feel shitty

17. What is your most treasured memory?

when i went camping with a bunch of friends and they were bitter i got to be in the middle of the tent because they were all cold. either that or the time i was getting really bad sleep paralysis and @lonelywaterfall & @skity stayed over so my paranoia didnt render me completely useless,,, also the paramore concert lol ive never been more vulnerable in my life.

18. What is your most terrible memory?

coming out to my mom haha

19. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?

i’d go on a trip around the world to explore/to see a few people, and i’d put extra effort into my gender expression

20. What does friendship mean to you?

comfortable silence is my kink. also emotional vulnerability and SAD BOY HOURS we cant forget those

21. What roles do love and affection play in your life?

I’m such a slut for physical affection yall have no idea please hug me as much as possible and play with my hair or my hands

22. Alternate sharing something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.

i guess ill do the same with previous partners so.. i think being funny is probably the #1 thing i appreciate in someone. when you make me laugh so hard i cry, just know that’s like. peak. also stubbornness is strangely attractive to me, plus like,,, uh having an unexpected soft side? an appreciation of art is super important, too. also SPOON VERSATILITY.

23. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?

it was probably happier than a lot of people’s but there wasnt much to it. plus being the youngest in my ENTIRE family really sucked during my childhood because everyone picked on me and i think that’s probably what started a lot of my issues lol

24. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

better than it could be, but definitely not what i want it to be. we both love each other and i admire her work ethic, but she gave me a lot of anxiety problems (both genetically and not) and she isnt the most understanding person. i have hope though, people change

25. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling …

I’m hungry and sitting alone in front of my computer feeling like OVERSHARING ON THIS BEAUTIFUL THURSDAY MORNING, BOYS

26. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share …

many, MANY animals and a lighthouse in the middle of nowhere

27. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.

I’m REALLY insecure about my body xd

28. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.

LOVE feeling safe. 

29. Share an embarrassing moment in your life.

probably every time that i’ve ever worn a dress, because i really,, really dont like wearing dresses and that’s it

30. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?

last cried by myself this morning and last cried in front of another person at my friend’s birthday party

31. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.

no partner but if youre reading this im rly proud of ur attention span. gj buddy

32. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?

i think most things can be joked about after a certain amount of time, but like,, it has to actually be funny and it has to come from someone i know isnt serious about it. if a joke is made just for the purpose of being offensive and edgy, it’s never funny no tea just truth. 

33. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?

i’d regret not spending enough time with people that i love, not traveling as much as i should have, and also i’d regret not formally coming out of the closet to my family (they probably already been done knew but like. yknow). i came out to myself & the people closest to me a LONG ass time ago, but i’ve kinda seen what it did to my immediate family so im not too excited to do that to my extended family. if i’m not too much of a pussy, ill probably do it in the summer when i see them next, bc ive been meaning to for a while.

34. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?

is it bad of me to say my computer? i feel like everyone else has a much more meaningful answer lol. it would probably either be that or the papers i keep on my bulletin board, bc most of them hold a lot of sentimental value (also my prescriptions  would be a pain to get copies of)

35. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?

either of my parents because i dont want them dying before i reach the point where i can expect them to be happy for me when i marry a girl

36. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

personal problems? what’re those lmfao dont have any srry try me again later

 i’m too much of a pussy to tag certain people so if you see this and I've had any sort of conversation with you, do it coward

(also @skity  @drawinintherain )