#im lesbian but also aroace so i cant relate to the lesbian community either

[acetheta]

i need to sleep but now im having a breakdown 😂

[lesbitchka]

mogaihell: cishet girl -> het ace girl -> aro ace girl -> pan ace girl -> pure anxiety. im just a mess of internalized homophobia and im scared of sexual attraction. i also cant tell if someone is attractive in a romantic or sexual or platonic way. ive recently accepted that i like girls (i think) but idk? nb ppl are cute too maybe? for a hot sec i thought i could call myself "q*eer" bc it was vague but still a label but its actually gross so. 1/2

2/2 im also hesitant to let go of the aroace label/community? tho in the past year its become utter fuckery and i hate it s ofucking much but ive already told ppl i was aroace and its like comfort in the familiarity of it? anyway i need a fucken label holy shit but ive been fucked by all these mogai microlabels that i cant tell what the fuck i actually feel. is 'sapphic' an orientation? fuck man im so lost wgjnkafmlegkald

sapphic isnt an orientation as much as a common label for lesbians and MGA girls, but acknowledging that it’s something that you identify with, even though you’re not sure what your sexuality is, is a good start! it already helps in that you know that you’re attracted to girls! and it can be a good placeholder while you’re questioning the intricacies of attraction

unfortunately, a lot of the time labels function in a way that... you need to try them and after some time, you’ll know whether it fits you or not. it’s certainly the case with calling oneself a lesbian

it’s fine to not be able to differentiate between platonic/romantic feelings and not be ready for/be scared of sexual relations. you didn’t include your age, and it could be either a result of that or of internalized homophobia. either way, don’t rush into anything. over time it’ll sort itself out - either you’ll find that you’re ready and want to try, or you won’t, and both is fine!