#im just.. i've seen this dynamic before i just can't remember /where/
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Note
Can you maybe do Clarisse x fem! Child of Hypnos?? I don’t think I’ve seen anything of that dynamic and I’d like to see how you would write it!
OKAY. IM ACTUALLY RLLY EXCITED ABT THIS SINCE JUST LIKE ANON SAID, I'VE NEVER SEEN A DYNAMIC LIKE IT BEFOREE.
Sweet Dreams
Clarisse La Rue X Daughter of Hypnos!Reader
Summary: A shared moment with clarrise with a flick of your finger.
Warnings: Hypnokinesis, people passing out and language
Author's note: Okay, I'm actually tired of some writers portraying a child of hypnos who likes to sleep... yeah, sure, their dad is the God of sleep, but that doesn't mean they just slump on their bed and snore away! They're also powerful! If you read the books !SPOILER ALERT! Hypnos literally knocked an entire city to sleep before the battle of Manhattan for Kronos. Why can't we portray his children like that? 🤨 No hate! Just speaking facts <33
CHILDREN OF HYPNOS DESERVES SOME RECOGNITION!! (coming from cabin 7)
——
You missed your girlfriend so much.
She was in archery and capture the flag today, but you two barely got enough time to run to each other before she was bombarded by tasks from Chiron.
You saw the way her eyes would soften from afar, giving you a discreet sympathetic look while she went on a rampage on her siblings ready to stab them into kebabs using her spear. But she knew you'd find a way to get to her, she always knew.
and you always do.
It wasn't long before every camper eventually dozed off after a fun sing-a-long around the campfire, singing their hearts out about their godly parent, minus a Demeter Girl complaining about getting a fern for her birthday instead of a car like all her friends.
So here you are, pulling your night robe closer as you impatiently wait for your father to caress Clarisse's siblings to sleep so you can have a moment with her.
But your father was taking way too long.
you have been hiding behind the cabin for hours, Listening to the unpleasant way the swords and spears of the Ares cabin got sharpened and big boisterous faces laughing at eachother. Clarisse was in her bunk, her arms crossed with a seemingly frowning expression. Every laughter made by her siblings made her more and more annoyed.
Every minute that passed made you more agitated until you finally snapped.
You stood behind the cabin and held your hands, focusing on the heartbeats and every breath that they exhaled, The sound around you became indistinct and fuzzy, the time seemed to slow down. A translucent light smoke seemed to snake inside the Cabin before it swirled around Clarisse' siblings, it took a few moments before their eyelids got heavy, their breathing ragged. And sure enough, there was a soft thud where their body fell.
It took you by surprise. It also snapped Clarisse out of her thoughts. Seeing her siblings who were talking lively minutes ago dozing off turned her off, She stood up alarmingly, ready to fend herself to any attacks of intruder.
When she saw you, her tense body softened, the beam on your face was a little unreadable, but she couldn't help but smile.
You ran and threw yourself into her arms, she caught you easily, carrying your weight like nothing.
"I did it, Clar!" You squealed, Clalrisse looked at you, confused.
"Did what, Baby?"
"My father finally blessed me! I get to use my powers, i can't believe this, did you see?!" You were babbling like a baby, words being thrown at her in hyperplaps, but she listened, never letting you go in her arms. She listened and remembered everything.
Like the time you were sobbing in her arms, after multiple failed attempts on praying to your father, it hurt her. She remembered when she used to devote herself to Ares, offering him big chunk of brisket and the freshest strawberries on her plate, just for him to answer her prayer, but it never worked, until finally he had enough of her, and gifted Clarisse a spear to shut her up.
But seeing you happy for finally being able to have powers, she felt something inside her change.
Clarisse tightened her arms around you, placing her nose to your hair, inhailing your scent.
"I'm proud of you" she pulled away and placed her hand against your cheek. She was slowly analyzing the color of your eyes, carefully studying each and every details your face had, then she slowly reached to your lips, the color was a mix of peach and pink, assuming it was from the lipgloss, but it looks so deliciously kissable right now.
Her hands reached the back of your head and before you know it, her lips were against yours, an arm wrapped around your waist while pulling you close.
"I love you, did you know that?" Clarisse whispered on your lips, "i doubt it" You laughed, falling over Clarisse' soft bunk bed as she kissed you once more.
An extra for you guys since i disappeared too long :>
——
There were soft groans and mumbles coming from Clarisse' siblings, it was already 3:46 am.
"What happened?" Asked Sherman while rubbing his temple.
Clarisse rolled her eyes at her brother, Sherman, glancing at their weapons leaned against their bunk.
"Nothing, i guess you two spent way too long gossiping that your eyes eventually took it themselves and took a rest" she said, Clarisse was trying not to grin at her siblings, knowing well that it was all her girlfriend's doing.
"Huh... what did you do when we're out then?" One of her brothers, Ellis asked.
"The usual, inspection and lights out"
"Really?" Both brothers said in unison.
"Yes, don't look at me like I'm lying, unless you want a spear up your ass" Clarisse snapped, rolling over and hugging her pillow to sleep.
Both brother looked at eachother and quietly snickered, i guess they'll keep hush about that peach and pink lipgloss smudge near clarisse' neck.
And they'll definitely tell the others tomorrow.
#clarrise pjo#percy jackon and the olympians#xy/n#thekissofaphrodite#clarisse la rue x reader#dior goodjohn#wlw#child of hypnos#percy jackson
382 notes
·
View notes
Text
so as hard as it may be to believe, i was a mileven shipper right up until just before vol 2 of s4 came out. not hardcore twitter mileven, but a shipper nonetheless. i did love will and mike's relationship, maybe even more than mileven, but i never clocked it as romantic. i vividly remember thinking "aww, will and mike would be so cute together but they would never let that happen." and never thought about it again. even when i saw the rain fight and heard "it's not my fault you don't like girls" i was like "ohh wow so will is probably gay" and didn't even think he was in love with mike. i didn't believe that until the s4 trailer said "i think there is someone he likes" and of course, this was because of my own heteronormativity. i dismissed everything i saw and didn't even look for hints because the idea that the writers would allow a gay relationship between two main characters was not even a thought in my head. once i dropped that and started to trust that the writers actually cared and did want queer characters/storylines, everything made sense.
so i went into s4 thinking mileven were gonna be fine and that will was sad and hopelessly in love with mike. i mean fully believing it. so im mindlessly watching s4 e2 and thinking "aww poor will mike is so in love with el he can't pay attention to will" no questions asked.
then the fight happened. when mike blew up and said "you were! you were! you were rolling your eyes, you were moping, you were barely talking you basically sabotaged the whole day" i was like " how do you know that" but still, i dismissed it and barely thought about it.
then it happened. "we're friends! we're. friends." all the alarm bells went off. red flags flew up. my eyebrows furrowed. "ummm what mike? he didn't say you were more than friends. why is he viewing this romantically and why is he being so defensive???"
i was so deep into believing the writers would never let the gay romance happen, but that just couldn't get past me. there's no other way that line can be interpreted. that's a trope that means one thing and one thing only.
my next thought was "ok, this is gonna be like the rain fight. will is gonna be really hurt by this and go silent."
but nope, will claps back with "well we used to be best friends!" and i was stunned. utterly stunned. what is going on here? what is this dynamic? and why is mike more worried about this than finding el? why did he care enough to completely stop walking so he couple blow up at will for not talking?? but still, i was somehow able to let this go. because the writers just wouldn't do that. would they?
the mileven fight happens and i've never wanted to backhand a teenager more in my entire life. i'm reminded of stancy and their whole "i love you" thing
then THIS happened, and i was thinking more and more that mike doesn't love el romantically. look at his face when will says "whatever you didn't say you can say it to her then". will starts talking but the camera stays focused on mike and will remains blurred. we're supposed to be taking in mikes reaction. he says yes, but frowns and blinks rapidly. will was trying to reassure him, but mike has not been reassured. i don't know how to describe the emotion on his face. it's like you just had a chance to clear up your lie, but you still didn't, and now you're back to thinking about the moment your lie will blow up in your face. it's like his face is saying, "no, i can't just say it to her then because i don't want to."
the scene where they talk on top of the car is what started to make me think mike doesn't love el romantically. his reaction to will saying "it's scary, to say how you really feel. especially to people you care about the most. because..what if they don't like the truth?" he nodded. he felt seen. i remember thinking "ooooh. he doesn't love her and he knows she won't like that" everything made sense. if we apply mike's monologue logic to this, it makes no sense. whatever it is that mike is feeling, he thinks el won't like it. then he supposedly decides that the moment to tell her that is when she's dying?
mike is lying. he was holding back saying how he feels because he knows el won't like it. then when she's dying, he suddenly thinks his feelings are what she wants enough that it'll save her life? whatever he was feeling on top of the car and what he tells her in the monologue are not the same. you don't tell someone something they won't like when they're dying.
and 2 years ago i came to this conclusion without an ounce me believing byler could be canon.
#stranger things#byler#will byers#mike wheeler#byler endgame#byler analysis#stranger things 4#mike wheeler i know what you are#milkvan bones#milkvan is bones#anti milkvan
189 notes
·
View notes
Note
hey dawg, me again
thinking again about cc (do i think of anything else? lol no) and just contemplating about their whole situation *cries*
because what a situation they're in in CW like........I've seen some other asks and your responses to them talking about it but like, the "normalcy" that they are going to get to in the epilogue one shot, mm mm mmm. thinking about the road to healing that they must all go through. thinking about how it all boils down to how does one make amends after hurting someone?
(story time to get my point) once when i was playing a contact sport, i hurt a member of my own team on accident, we knocked heads pretty hard. so hard my teammate was one the ground screaming in pain, holding their face. While i managed to stand and walk off with just a bump on my forehead and a slight headache for a few days, i later found out that i'd hit my head against their eye. they had a pretty bad concussion for a while and months later at the optometrist they found out they had a small tear in the corner of their retina. (not trying to trauma dump, i promise i'm getting somewhere!!!)
the point of the story is just, guilt man. I'd hurt my friend, on accident, but i'd still hurt them and pretty badly too. after the collision there was just nothing i could do to make it right. I couldn't undo the hit no matter how much i wanted too. and because of who they were they didn't like anyone making a fuss about them. it was the first time i can remember hurting someone so badly and being aware of the fact that i was the direct cause. It was my fault. And that's how i think leo and raph and mikey feel in a sense. it feels like the same kind of guilt, the same kind of "i hurt you, it was my fault, i'm sorry, but 'i'm sorry' doesn't fix this, we can heal from this but i can't take back anything i did to you, and still, i'm going to be sorry about this forever" and the riveting conclusion of "i never want to hurt you (or anyone) ever again" (even though it wasn't entirely their faults, even though there is so much they can do to help the healing, even though they/you will end up hurting others again; in life it's inevitable) *falls to my knees and rakes them closer to me like you would leaves* *wailing*
i lub you tmnt ninja turtles, i luvh you complicated sibling dynamics, i loob(hate) you passage of time that does not heal the ache but soothes it like a balm *family guy dead pose*
YEAHHHHGHHH YOU GET IT ,,,,, they are ALL crumbling under the weight of what's been put on their family, and it is Immensely traumatic for the three of them, too. obviously they've been in combat before, but never in a way that's so violent. visceral. leo stabbed him and heard the squelch of the blade tearing through donnie's skin and muscle. he felt his body shudder as he screamed under him. raph returned to clarity with his hands around his little brother's throat, right after hearing him beg him not to kill him. they all remember the sound of the sickening snap of his wrist, the way his terrified pleading and sobbing slurred as he slowly gave up. the sound of his skull smacking against the floor. there was a very real moment after the curse broke where mikey thought donnie's last words to him were "im sorry".
they still smelled the blood weeks after the fact. leo had to confront his injuries head-on in order to save his life, HE was the one responsible for saving his life despite what he'd just gone through (after taking a nasty blow to his head too, mind you). it is. insanely traumatic for them. and now they cant hear the sound of donnie screaming or crying at all without flying into a panic. it really goes beyond simple guilt, it's something so much more painful. not to mention the way that the curse twisted their values and coping mechanisms, so now they cant fall back on them anymore.
even if donnie accepted them immediately in the way raph dreamed about, it wouldnt have healed them. even when he can stand them being around him again, he's still going to have triggers, and so are they. they cleaned up all the evidence and fumbled horribly by removing the footage and rebuilt donnie's room because they wanted so badly to undo it, but there's nothing they can do but wait.
its just. arghghhhh its all so messed up and im loving the fuck out of it
12 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi farmer lesbian!
so ive identified as bisexual for a long time but ive discovered recently i feel very comfortable within the lesbian ideas of gender and specifically the butchfemme community. i’ve been dating someone recently who also identified as bisexual but has related to transmasc lesbians understanding of gender as well as posts about butches. we both kind of see ourselves within the butchfemme dynamic but i’ve been very tough on myself with calling myself a lesbian because i’ve dated a man before (…in middle school..)
it’s gotten to the point where i’m really worried to label myself because of what it’d imply for my partner? but also what people would say? and while i know i dont HAVE to label myself it just sucks to know theres an identity im drawn to and feel like i fit into that i cant immediately slip into
hmm i'm not really sure how to guide you here. i guess i want to challenge you on some of the things you're saying here, it feels like you're coming at this from maybe the "wrong" angle (wrong feels too harsh a word, maybe just not the most helpful angle)
you're worried you can't call yourself a lesbian because you dated a boy in middle school? i think.. a LOT of lesbians dated boys in jr. high and high school and there are lots of late in life lesbians who were married to men for years before figuring out who they are and coming out. this is all completely normal and common. like, dating one boy in middle school doesn't really mean much tbh. i wouldn't base your identity or label you use around something like that. i dated a bunch of boys in high school and early college when i was still figuring out who i was. your labels or identity or gender or sexuality don't need to account for all you life experiences and past. it's not so much about your sexual history but describing who you are *now*, what you're interested in, in the present.
you say both you and your partner really like Lesbian Genders and butch/femme stuff. that's nice, but liking and relating to lesbian culture and gender stuff doesn't make you a lesbian haha! it's who you're attracted to and who you're not, that determines your orientation. gender and orientation are different things, as i'm sure you know. obviously very connected and stuff. like, for example, just because someone identifies as a man it doesn't make him straight, even though heterosexuality is an integral part of manhood, in the dominant culture. gay trans men are certainly not rare! the same goes for you guys.
also, remember that transmasculinity is a broad umbrella and encompasses a wide variety of people and their identities and experiences. plenty of butches aren't transmasc, and probably most transmascs aren't butch.
i will tell you that in the course of running this blog and being on the internet, i've probably seen and shared thousands of photos and drawing of people. not once have i ever seen something that represents me and my wife. if you are seeking out representation or examples of the options to be, in order to figure out who/what you are, i would advise against that. seek what feels true to you, what feels honest and right. you do not need to be similar to other people in order to find belonging, acceptance, and community. (though of course this is absolutely nothing wrong or bad if you do find others just like you, if you do fit in to existing roles and dynamics! that is of course perfectly normal!)
now, i don't know you or your partner. you know yourselves best. i can't tell you what you really are or really aren't. and i certainly am not going to tell you what you can or can't be! everything i'm saying here is to prompt you to think about and questions to ponder for yourself.
so, i think you have some points to think about, why have you been identifying as bisexual? what is drawing you to the lesbian label? have you tried using 0 labels and not thinking about your identity or labels for at least a month or two (if not a several months) and then coming back and evaluating it afresh? what about the butch-femme dynamic are you drawn to? what is holding you back? you are allowed to discover that you are a lesbian! or you are allowed to continue to be bisexual! i can't tell you who you are - but you're allowed to be and do whatever you want, whatever feels true to you! even if it doesn't make sense to other people or you don't see anyone else like you out there. you gotta be a little bit brave!
hang in there, and sending much love to you and yours! 🧡
#ask farmer lesbian#mod alfalfa#mod horseshoe#questioning#identity#gender#labels#if any of my followers have advice or similar experiences please always feel free to add your take as well!
22 notes
·
View notes
Note
I don't know if this is asking too much (if so, I'm sorry) but could you write at least one shot from Paz Lives AU? About family daily life. Or Cabin in the Woods with Hunter, Spider and the twins? I love the dynamics you described and in the form of a short story it would be a masterpiece haha. But I also don't want to distract you too much from the original Canina or seem like Im asking for something all the time in an annoying form
Your not annoying me at all. And if I put Cabin on pause to write a oneshot then that's my choice, I'm fully capable of saying "I like that idea, I'll write it after Cabin."
I don't know if I'll ever write a Paz lives modern Au oneshot. I do have more of those bullet point thoughts written out that I just haven't posted yet but that might be as far as I go with that au. Same with the idea of Cabin with the twins. I like the idea in concept but I don't think I'll take in further then bullet point ideas. That being said I've got a lot of idea's for that au so allow me to share those now
So same sequence of events as Cabin, Paz is killed by a drunk driver while she's pregnant, only this time she's expecting twins and is already a mother to 5 year old Spider and 2 year old Hunter. the twins were able to be saved, Quaritch goes to jail for trying to kill Paz's killer, and all the siblings end up in foster care.
I was reading articles on why siblings are separated in the foster system for another ask and there are a few different reasons but in this case it would be 1. lack of resources. there are just too many of them and no one willing to take in four kids all at once. 2. Spider is of course traumatized from the sudden loss of both his parents and as a result gets super protective of his siblings, to a point where he makes it almost impossible for any adult to take care of any of them. 3. age. Spider is the only one who would be able to remember his siblings. the others are too little to be really bonded to each other. Because of all this it's decided that it'll be best if the kids are separated. The younger kids will all go to stable homes and Spider can get one on one help to process the loss of his family.
Spider never accepts it though, growing bitter at a very young age, hating and distrusting all the adults tasked with caring for him.
Remember in the Cabin prologue when Quaritch went to visit Spider in his group home? That happens here too only instead Spider is 7 and is over joyed to see his dad, begging him to take him away. Quaritch refuses, saying that he needs to get him and his siblings back legally but Norm still catches him and accuses Quaritch of trying to kidnap Spider. This too all plays out like in Cabin with Quaritch being dubbed mentally unstable and having his parental rights terminated.
After this incident though Spider starts running away from his foster homes. He's not specifically trying to get back to his dad, he just really wants out. He's found and brought back every time but as he gets older he gets better at it. His record is going 16 days without being found. He was 11 at the time.
When Spider is 12 he get's placed with the McCosker's
Nash McCosker is an abusive ass hole who screams at and beats Spider for the smallest offense. He threatens Spider with even worse if he tries to tell anyone about it.
So in the middle of the night Spider packs up his backpack and runs
It's around four in the morning, he's exhausted, it feeling like his lungs could burst he's been running for so long and all he wants is to lay down for a little bit, but he knows he can't. He only has two more hours before someone notices that's he's gone. So he forces himself to keep going
But then a car pulls up, blocking his path. The window rolls down, reveling his dad. "get in." he commands
Spider is stunned. A mix of emotions floods him. Shock, anger, grief. He hasn't seen his father since that day at the group home, years ago now. He had said he was trying to get him back. instead he seemed to have abandoned him.
Seeing no other options though Spider gets into his dad's car.
His heart breaks when they pull up to their old family home, now standing like a memorial of everything they've lost.
The moment they get inside Spider turns on his father, "Why did you leave me! You said you where trying to get me back! to get use all back! What the hell happened to that!"
Quaritch does his best to calm his son, explaining everything, that he tried to get them back the legal way but the courts where rigged against him and terminated his parental rights. That he's been watching over all of his kids but particularly Spider since his living situation is the worst out of all of the siblings.
He explains that now that Spider is a know run away he can just stay with him, living in their old home. No one will suspect Quaritch of kidnapping. If the cops come by looking for Spider he can hide in the attic until they leave. In enough time the search will be dropped and they can live peacefully
"but what about my siblings? how can we get them back?" Spider askes innocently.
"don't you worry about that right now. Papa's got a plan. For right now I'm more concerned about you. We'll focus on your siblings once your in the clear."
Spider's a nervous wreak the first few weeks of living with his dad again.
because this is the best he's had it since before his mom died and he's terrified that'll all be ripped away again.
His dad is just as paranoid listening to a police scanner every second of the day.
The police showed up with a search warrant after a month. Spider was safely tucked away in the attic long before they got there.
The entrance to the attic is in a closet on the second floor. it's easy to miss if you don't know where to look. It's completely un detectable after Quaritch hides it with mountains of junk typical for a hallway closet.
the police search the whole house and the surrounding area. They search that closet to. But they never find the attic.
Shortly after the search is called off. Miles "Spider" Socorro is just gone, with no hope of ever finding him.
Father and son are thrilled. they settle into a semblance of a life together. Spider can never really leave the house. His dad homeschools him, but it's no replacement for the social interactions he'd have at a real school. The isolation only makes the absence of his siblings hurt all the more.
It took his father months to even get Spider to go upstairs. The kid broke down when he saw his old room, still exactly how it had been when he'd been taken away. No matter how much time passed he could never bring himself to venture further down the hall. Every time he so much as glanced at the shut doors of his siblings abandoned bedrooms his heart ached.
It took time, but his dad helped him redo his old bedroom, turning it into something befitting of a preteen.
After six months of living with each other Quaritch took Spider out to "visit" his siblings
Hunter was 10 at the time. He was at school, quietly reading on the playground, his face so closely pressed into the book, his nose was touching it's binding, when a bully approached slapping the book from his hand. His father had to physically restrain Spider so he didn't go over there and kick the other kids ass.
Seeing Gunner and Ada was less eventful. The twins where 7 going on 8 at the time. Gunner was playing in a soccer game, Ada was on the side lines with her moms pretending she was a "witch princess" making a potion out of dirt, leaves, and rocks. Spider couldn't help but laugh at his little sister and cheer for his little brother every time he got the ball.
Quaritch and Spider go to spy on his sibling every couple of weeks.
Except in the summer. In the summer they go on a cross country road tip to stay in a cabin high up in the mountains. Spider loves the change in scenery but it still makes him a little sad. Because his father actually built the cabin himself for the entire family. So just like back home, there were three extra bedrooms, awaiting kids that would never live there.
I'm going to continued this in a part 2 so look out for that. Hope you enjoyed💞
10 notes
·
View notes
Text
TW: REFERENCE TO SH AND RELAPSE OF SH AND SUICIDE ATTEMPT
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ok so ik ive been inactive for a *WHILE* and im srry for that but like i have a buncha things that happened these past 3 months that I NEED To share SOOOO....
First things first, the one im most excited abt: I DID MY FIRST PERFORMANCE!!! My school was doing little mermaid jr and I got Scuttle! I was really happy to get my first role and getting at least one solo, and Im just happy overall on how it went! I think I did really good on my first try! Only bad thing was that now im kinda going through my lil mermaid hyperfixation and have been looking up fics where Sebastian and Ariel kinda have a Father/Parental Figure-Daughter or Older Brother-Younger (stupid but ultimately well meaning) Sister dynamic and have started to write a fic on that bc no ones done it before apparently😒(im going cray cray, bonkers mayhaps)
Might've gotten my eye infected(I live in the east of the us, new york to be more specific and woke up the day after the "live vintage (BLAME CANADA/j) filter" with my right eyes nerves slightly more irritated and haven't gotten that checked out so thats fun)
FINALLY finished that one drawing ive been making for 3 MONTHS.(well, technically....)
Almost done writing my passion project, AKA the one I originally wanted to make into an animated series but have settled for a book just in case that can't happen! I still need to work out some kinks, design more outfits, get all their personalities in check, make sure the world and magic is fully fleshed out, ect.
I also do band, and while I originally thought that I would have a problem bc of both band and theatres close scheduling(i originally had dress rehearsal on june 2nd, AND my band concert on June 2nd) but it all worked out in the end! My band concert went great, and while the dress rehearsal was a mess, we at least got through it! :)
Unintentionally quit SH! I was originally only meant to stop until AFTER performances, but ive been bettering myself and learned that if I ever want to forgive myself or at least move on I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself and not forget nor forgive, but remember, i just can't let it haunt me. I know I'll relapse, I always do eventually, but I want to enjoy these few moments of mental "clarity" while I can. I've also learned that for some reason i tend to become a more terrible person and despicable person the more time I spend at home with my mother, so that's fun. God, I hate America's education system, its messed me up BAD. AND the foster care system. I just tried to kms 2 times today, and she didn't even notice, or care. How sad is that?
On a lighter note, yes, as the rest of yt and TikTok, I got a minor lil hyperfixation on the Lorax and really think ppl should make more [PLATONIC] Lorax and Onceler dynamics, mainly the type where they're like some really annoying pair of bickering siblings or a father whos sick of his adopted child's shit, like there is so much on the table for platonic fluff and angst and most of what I've seen is romantic smut and fluff like CHANGE IT UP A LIL
Also, Ive been going to karaoke centers on Tuesdays and have become a lot more confident to performing in front of ppl! So far, I've performed "All You Wanna Do", "The Ballad of Jane Doe", "Heart of Stone", and am gonna do "What the World Needs" the next upcoming Tuesday, where I'm gonna try interacting with the audience while singing!!
(Also, before I end this....I may have ADHD??? my teacher who has ADHD says some of my behavior is "similar to hers"(i feel like thats just her way of saying i reek of neurodivergency) and I also did some research and I display similar/exact behaviors listed, have taken online tests from doctorate confirmed sites and basically all of them said to go get a diagnosis. I also found I do a few behaviors similar to stimming! Also also, I kinda suspect a lil more bc my mom has Autism and apparently sometimes neurodivergency is biological (i forgor the word) but my mom is kinda in denial abt my Depression diagnosis and thinks I got anxiety "biologically", so if I tell her I wanna get tested for ADHD shes just kinda gonna gaslight me into not believing that and i already told the school therapist and basically she just told me that I'm probably just imagining things or copying behaviors from my mother and that "kids like to give themselves all these titles nowadays" so I just did what I always do which is to keep it shut and act until they think you fell in line)
So yeah, thats all! Thanks for reading, now that my schedule is clear again ima start posting more frequently again, so be aware :) <3333
#musical theater#musical theatre#theater kid#theatre#band kids#band practice#band vs theatre#clarinet#electric guitar#piano#lorax 2012#the little mermaid#self care#self improvement#self mutalition#self h@rm#note to self#recovering#inevitable relapse#book series#what being a writer is like sometimes#possible adhd#i feel sick#sewer slide#sewerslide attempt#angst writing#i need a nap#i need therapy#i need to be put down#i need to start writing again
12 notes
·
View notes
Note
Do you have any ships for Marianne or Daighre? If you do, would you like to gush about them?
i woke up to this (two days ago lol) and was like 'whoa don't give me too much platform about this topic' hahaha
okay just IM GIVING YOU ONE LAST CHANCE TO BACK OUT lol no too late for that. this isn't just romantic ships but also friendships because uwu i love it when someone adopts marianne.
aight so fiiiirst, @dcwnthercbbithcle IDK MAN, I THINK WE'VE BEEN FOLLOWING EACH OTHER FOREVER why did we just talk now coz Fiadh and my baby just clicked together so well. i'm always super happy to find muses that are involved in the cycle one verse coz i think marianne is somehow a different person back then living a different life altogether. it's a pretty confined life, yes, and that's why i'm so happy she has fiadh aka literal force of nature. i think bunni just knows how to talk to me coz we just keep yelling back and forth at each other about daighre and fiadh and it's all fun and games until your bestie chooses to kick the bucket on you after all you've been through - literal lore getting written because of their shenanigans, going through a war and grief, balancing their domains and friendship together, and then she's gone and you have to go through your long lame life alone. and the best part is meeting again in the future and knowing things have changed between them but they're kinda clinging to some semblance of the past, one because she remembers, the other coz she does not. HAVE YOU SEEN THE LONG HEADCANONS BUNNI WRITES FOR THEM I CANNOT I AM CRY
next is allie. i'm so thankful for @wildcxrds for being marianne's first bestie when she got back in the rp scene. i love this because they share the same element - fire - but have veeery different dispositions. where marianne is temperamental, allie is patient. where marianne is quick to anger, allie is all patience. and extra points because allie is an orphan and yet she's the one who sort of adopted marianne. anyway, i'm so glad i'm seeing you around again! excited to write with you once more!!!
@cfgcdsandmcnsters's malakai. this guys should be a lesson to all that when you say "sEnD shIppY meMes EvEn if wE DoN'T hAVe A shIP" WILL GET YOU A MEME AND A SHIP AHAHAHA. oKAY BUT FIRST LET ME SAY THAT LILA IS LITERALLY THE BEST HGJSFGJSHDFGJHG SO AMAZINg. I'm so terribly sorry Marianne isn't as creative as Malakai and all she can come up with is a dumb nickname while she gets something poetic AF ahahahaha. I'm sorry what, i can't hear you over eventide sun HAHAHAHA. he's sooo gentle with her and it kinda annoys her? like 'wtf you can't always put me first, mal'. never thought marianne would ever hang out in a punk club but what can we do...
@vihilum and i one day jumped on discord and just planned the entire dynamics of reed and marianne and HOW DID THAT HAPPEN? OH yes because i randomly doodled a thing and bam! ship. anyway, i know you're not here a lot but i just want to say anyway that i loved what we talked about and your enthusiasm for their dynamics. your demon child reed will always have a home in marianne whenever your guys are back.
and you're last @heksery because i can (no because you have two, wtf that's illegal). this is funny coz we were both out of tumblr when it happened, there were memes before there were even ships, and honestly, the ships happened because of the memes. ironically, i haven't finished the meme that started this. it's not much but i will finish it anyway otherwise i will feel like i've tricked u into doing this HAHAHAHA. i think i once said their trope is found family but how to unfind them HAHAHA i love that Marianne gets some degree of pass from jules and pat HAHAHAHA
if you've heard of fun's some nights "coz i could use some friends for a change", i guess that's her thing with jules especially. like, does she fully trust jules? no, but she's not looking for someone who will 100% not stab her in the back and who has a shiny moral compass. she's there for jules' strength and no-nonsense attitude and her begrudging way of showing love because, i think, at the back of her mind marianne knows she has also this begrudging way of accepting love. if jules wants to take care of people but she doesn't wanna admit it, marianne wants to be taken care of but HAHA she doesn't recognize it either so jules can insult her and she can angrily accept.
idk what she liked about patrick. he's hot? but yeah no kidding, it's probably that plus the swag and power and his hair lol. that's soooo sexy to her but also annoying AF. and your boi can't resist egging her on and she can't resist wanting to take him down a notch but they have to watch their tempers because it's either breaking the bed or breaking the house probably. just like with jules, i don't think marianne would ever admit it but she feels safe in his presence because she knows he could take her attitude and he could also take her on - in a banter, in a fight, in *ahem* other stuff - like in terms of power he can match her. so it's basically the touch her and you die but also touch him and you die so just let me scream quietly in my corner thanks
haha oh well i think that's all. i probs said too much, but hey, you asked XD I just wanna thank everyone who puts up with me about this ahahaha *sinks back to the sea*
#(.ask me i should know: answered)#haha thank you for asking uwu#i hope your breakfast/lunch/dinner is fine AF
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
Labyrinth runners predictions/thoughts (spoilers ofc)
Ok first of all illusion head? Gus seems to be looking at them fearfully so Im not gonna immediately bet they're the "unlikely ally" but they will definitely have a major role in this episode. Personally I hope hes an antagonist as out of the 4 coven heads we've seen only terra is loyal to belos and a fourth rebel would kind of make belos look like a joke imo.
Next is amity and willow walking together so it looks like they will finally have a scene to reconcile without luz. I wonder how their dynamic will be, will willow still be slightly hesitant? How will amity deal with the fact that she bullied willow for years? I can't wait to find out.
And finally HUNTER MY BOI, he seems to be safe, for now. He's also wearing a cloak to hide from someone (not very effective if you ask me, the hair strands too recognisable) Maybe the EC,after EOTW they seem to be actually doing something about wild witches now and hunter being the literal golden guard AND now knowing his genocide plan would make him a top priority. MAYBE he goes to the school to seek help from willow and the emerald entrails, and maybe while there he runs into a certain abomination coven leader? (I love dadrius a bit too much) ik it said that only the EC would be there but its not entirely impossible since the illusion head will be there. Alternatively hunter could just be in the forest somewhere and willow being a friend of hunters, and amity, upon luz request go out to look for him.
I personally think he'll be the ally tho, as we've already had luz and hunter, amity and hunter and even willow and hunter, it's gus' turn for the life changing field trip.
Next image, gus with flapjack and his own palisman on his shoulders and one glowing white eye. Not really much to say here tbh. I guess more material for hunter is the ally? But why the glowing eye? I've heard the idea of gus getting a sigil being thrown around but eyes don't glow when getting a sigil (i checked) and the only other times I can remember glowing eyes are belos, but they aren't similar, and willow and her plant thing. They're not identical but they're a lot closer, perhaps gus could be tapping into a similar power.
Finally this, nothing new to really add here tbh except look at gus' bag I need 12 of them right now. Idk who the yellow purse belongs to, hunter? I mean its yellow and that basically his thing
Anyway I think that hunters going to be the unlikely ally who will team up with gus to work against the illusionist coven head. I think hunters would be the type to actively start working against belos after he found out the LITERAL GENOCIDE in A WEEK. Hopefully we will learn about what hunter did after hollow mind and why he would be at hexside (my bets still on finding emeralds entrails and perhaps darius). If the students are being branded with sigils then I can see him wanting to protect his friends. I'm not sure how amity and willow fit into this tho, I doubt theyre just hanging out on the final episode before the DOU (that feels wrong to say) but tbh if they are I won't be mad. They do really need the scene where amity properly apologies to willow
OR the illusionist head is the ally and amity and willow are looking for hunter in the forest it'd be a nice b plot and we havent had a proper b plot in a whole so I think it'd be nice
#the owl house#toh spoilers#toh#toh analysis#toh season 2#the owl house spoilers#help im having to many thoughts about this episode#long post
26 notes
·
View notes
Note
hi!! I just read the new chapter of sleep awake and I'm just like, photosynthesizing?? Because it was so good and it kept me on edge the whole time?? /pos
like I'm in love with how you write the reader because they're so unique and the way they've grown is just incredible. You see them go from not living for themselves *to* finally living for themselves, if that makes sense. It was just so obvious that the reader just needed a certain "push" so that they can grow into their own person and so many people has helped them do that and it's just so sweet to see the reader like make friends with everyone and start living for themselves y'know. I love the reader's friendships with everyone and most importantly Kokichi and the reader's relationship. I love how everyone around them just kinda like sees that something is going on between them especially that one scene where Shuichi finds the reader in the library after the whole korekiyo trial. (sorry just tryna make this spoiler free as best as I can-) I just adore this book sm. The lastest chapter was so nerve racking because I was just like "oh god what if kokichi comes back and sees reader-" but Luckily that didn't happen- I love that the reader also came up with a plan on their own because that's just so girlboss of them. I will admit though that I am very scared about the upcoming trials especially with chapter 4, 5, and 6 because there's just gonna be so much happening and I'm excited to see how the reader is gonna react to it all, especially chapter 4 but man let me tell you how pumped I am for chapter 5 for obvious reasons. I don't know if you plan on changing that trial up but it doesn't matter because it's gonna be so fucking good and like I said before, seeing the reader react to it all is always gonna be on my mind and I can't wait to see how it all ends. I always remember you saying you were gonna change up chapter 6 which is also gonna be in my mind too because that's something that's obviously gonna make me on the edge of my seat. Oh and I can't forget about the aftermath of the game too, that's gonna be fucking exciting to see as well. Anyways this book has made me love Kokichi even more than I already do and now I'm kinda starting to like Kaito more too. Oh and I can't help but think about how Kokichi is feeling as well, especially after korekiyo's trial, we all know Kokichi hates killing but since *Spoilers* the reader did it in self defense you can't exactly blame them, and im sure Kokichi knows that. If the reader didn't fight back they would've been killed and I'm sure that Kokichi wouldn't want that either, which is why his feelings are probably all like "jsjsjfjsjdjcndb" if that makes sense- and the reader is to conflicted about their feelings, not only for Kokichi but also for their whole plan and stuff. My theory is that if everything stays the same in chapter 5, they're gonna finally realize their feelings for Kokichi. (which is ansgty but yolo-) because in the story they get asked if they like Kokichi but you don't see the reader really giving a yes or no answer, which is why I think they're confused, and they also mentioned that they never liked anyone in that way before which is also gonna make you confused once you actually do start catching feelings for a person. I just can't get over how amazingly written they're dynamic is and I can't wait to see more of them together. And writing this while listening to "I won't say I'm in love" is giving me a bit of kokichi x reader vibes-
Anwyays again I'm sorry for ranting again, I'm the one who asked if kokichi was the love interest in the story and that was also the night I spent reading it all which was a very fun way to spend my night. I don't really feel comfortable with turning off anonymous so I was wondering if you do things like *insert emoji* anon like I've seen other blogs do-? I'm still a bit new to Tumblr-
oh wow, thank u so so much. i just. wow. this comment is os long n in depth im gna try to respond to everything u have said!!
the reader in this story is like. unspeakably important to me because in a lot of ways they represent myself and the kind of journey i wish that i could realistically go through. i dont wanna get too deep into it or make it angsty but i will say that a lot of the stuff they struggle w reflects my own state of mind a lot of the time n i justttt. find it very comforting n overwhelming that their struggle resonates with u too. im very glad their journey seemed somewhat poignant to you, because i rly did put a lot of work into make it realistic and cathartic.
im super super excited for the second half of this story!! i have a fuckton of ideas bouncing around that i really need to nail down and start making a plan that isn't just a skeleton plot but im mainly focused on chapter four for now? i will definitely say that the end of chapter four will be a major turning point for the story, in terms of the reader and their relationships with everybody. and without spoiling anything the end of chapter four and chapter five has the potential to be the darkest the story has ever gone imo? idk if i'm decided on what EXACTLY is going to happen but yeah, it'll be pretty messed up im sure.
you're pretty spot on with kokichi's feelings for the reader regarding after korekiyo's trial. he's basically in the midst of a major conflict and i guess undergoing the kind of ephiphany he never really had to face in the game? we know that he detests killing and sees it pretty unanimously as indefensible, which IS a fairly naive mindset in the grand scheme of things (which is why i love kaito calling kokichi naive in chapter two and kokichi just being. fucking flabbergasted. because as much as he is smart and perceptive he IS kind of naive in the sense of moral compass). it's also theorised that kokichi let himself die in chapter 5 because he couldn't rly cope with the guilt of what he did to gonta and miu which is maybe something i'm going to touch on a little? idk, some of the brilliance of his character relies on the ambiguity of it. so we will see.
but pretty much, there was nobody kokichi truly trusted in the real game. shuichi was the closest but even then it couldn't have been worth much, kokichi never went to him for help or told him any of his real plan, his ultimate hamartia and cause of his downfall. BUT of course the reader has become that for him, they are probably the closest he has gotten to trusting anybody in this game and he's shown his hand to them a lot and grown to genuinely care for them, and now they have in his eyes done the worst thing imaginable. so he's in a place of trying to reconcile that i think. i know he's been fairly absent for a couple of chapters but this storyline of how he's feeling will get a lot of clarity pretty soon, i pinky promise!
obviously i will not comment on chapter five in the interest of spoilers but i can also confirm that reader is also super confused about their own feelings. personally a symptom (???) of my own autism is conflating platonic and romantic feelings. on top of that, it's probably the furthest thing from their mind, plus with how much kokichi puzzles them, PLUS the fact that they have nothing to really compare it to having never liked anybody romantically? yeah it's not looking good brev.
PLEASE don't apologise for rambling!! i rly thoroughly enjoyed reading this n i've been thinking abt it a lot for the past few days trying to write up an answer to do it justice. i rly hope ur seeing this and that ur having a lovely lovely day!! and also yeah i do emoji anons, the only taken ones I THINK are 🦋 and 🐇 so u can pick anything u like my lovely <33 i hope to see u in my inbox again sometime soon!!
15 notes
·
View notes