#im just filled with joy;;;;
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I got myself the best thing ever,,
#its so beautiful its perfect i love it so much i am so happy#😭😭😭#ohmygodohmygodohmygod#its a dream come true to own brokeback mountain stuff#everything is absolutely delightful#and i can't believe this dvd box set exists either#the thing im the most stunned to own is. an actual piece of the film.#like what.. am i allowed to have that??#the realization is hitting i am going to start screaming emotional nonsense!!!#im just filled with joy;;;;#brokeback mountain#tiny goes feral
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AuDHD is so funny sometimes like what do you mean my hyperfixations/special interests will last for years on end or possibly forever but they will cycle out every month or two with absolutely no transitional period or warning. like i will think about the same topic every day obsessively for 46 days in a row and on the 47th day with no visible cause adhd brain goes "ok! bored of that now" and autism brain goes "dw i got something queued up for ya" and i blast into full blown obsession on some other topic whose mental file folders haven't opened in 9 months. brain's out here treating hyperfixations like a crop rotation. once the dopamine runs out it cycles in another one but once something's in the rotation it never ever leaves. last summer we brought in one from when i was 11. it's so funny to me but frustrating too bc like. i cannot stress enough my inability to predict or control this. or how completely abrupt and random it can be
#actually adhd#actually autistic#audhd#aphelion.txt#ik 'adhd brain' vs 'autism brain' is a gross oversimplification especially given how much overlap there can be#but it at least helps me conceptualize wtf is going on in my head when i do this lol#and yeah i'm mostly referring to fandoms in this post but it can happen w more 'Traditional' special interests too#like my linguistics special interest which hasn't popped up in a couple years now but whenever it does#i will fill literal notebooks while studying 4 languages at once and simultaneously inventing a conlang#and then i'll be like Ok that was fun! and several months later im deleting like. 2gb of textbooks off my iphone to make room for an update#And sometimes yeah there is a precipitating event like 'Oh something new happened in X fandom with my blorbo!' but sometimes it's like#yeah. no. idk either. switch got flipped in my brain and X no longer sparks joy. only Y rn. how come it's Y? yeah idk i also wish i knew#i don't think any of this is actually an uncommon experience for people with these types of neurodivergencies it's just.#the severity of abruptness and TOTALITY of the switch that makes me feel like a weirdo sometimes lol#like I'M getting mental whiplash from this sometimes. idk how y'all are still following my blog
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YOUR HENRY DESIGN IS EVERYTHING TO ME!!! HE'S SO!!!!!!
IM SO GLAD YALL LIKE HENRY’S DESIGN! 🧡
#ask reply#SERIOUSLY IM SO GLAD..#I held off on drawing in full because I wanted to get his vibe just right#FEELS like that paid off with talks comments 😭🧡#SOME of you calling him ‘perfect’ etc FILLS ME WITH JOY#nothing makes me happier with some of yall being into him too#I ALWAYS that that as a compliment#it’s cuffin season 🙏🏾#AGAIN promise I’ll draw him more soon#I definitely feel more encouraged after this!!#more Henry content soon 🧡🧡🧡#will it be with William? with Charlie? Michael?#yall just gotta wait and see 💜🧡
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fav skz // Canteen! Canteen! Canteen!
#this is probably Han's cutest moment to me#like he was just so excited to have a shared experience and memory with someone since he missed most of those in korea#such a simple silly little thing but he was just so filled with joy it really makes me smile every time. Also felix being like WOO YEA#even though im certain he was half like (?) lol#fav skz#han jisung#lee felix#stray kids edit#skz edit#bystay#createskz#stray kids gifs#stray kids#skz#skz gifs#skzedit#hanji#anyway i'd wanted to gif this for a while so why not today hey#also yeah the brown paper bag and the little square tins of lasagne or spaghetti lmao#i'd only get lunch from the canteen once in a blue moon on a friday if mum decided she didnt want to make lunch
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"it's so embarrassing you like that popular thing" "oh ew that geeky/strange thing is so cringe lol" "oh it's kind of weird you get excited about that harmless shit"
dude i love how ironic and jaded you are and that's so cool and sexy of you. and i am so so glad to tell you - you won!! we all had a meeting and we decided that you won, and we are writing your name on the inside of a burger king crown. the marker smeared, sorry, but we knew any form of real effort is ugly to you. but anyway. congrats! you are officially the coolest, most ironic, most jaded person in-the-world-right-now. we would throw you a party but you would think it was totally boring - and besides, we're weird so we wouldn't have been coming. we would have brought our love of beetles and of baking and of little canapes. we would have brought our artsy videogames and pages of writing. we would have written a poem with you, our hands covered in ink, and spread out a canvas to dance on, the night so lurid and pink.
but do not worry. we will not throw the party. we will just get you a ringlight and that crown i mentioned. it is a nice crown, except for where one of us dropped it.
the vote was a really hard one because we had so many cool ironic people to pick off the shelves. all of you have hands that rot fruit, how strange is that - you can't look at something without destroying it for other people. you like it when you can squeeze a person into a pinpoint - all us small ones scampering our little feet around our ugly joys. the vote was also a hard one because we kept our voices down because you don't like it when we talk too loud. you were on your phone at the time, talking to people other than us. you are a ghoul of every moment - half in, half out, you resent us for being here without shame or embarrassment.
so good news! we have invented an island for people like you. you get to go there and speak into the air things like if you still like watching harmless twitch streamers in 2023 you're fucking boring. you will say things like liveplay podcasts are fucking ugly and it's kind of awkward they try to make everything gay. on the island we made you, all of your words will have weight. they will form in the air like icicles, large white behemoth letters that will crumple in anvils around your feet. maybe we will send someone there once in a while to sweep, but honestly you might be there for a while, alone, waiting. we are busy being outside looking for mushrooms and flapping our hands and humming. we are busy kicking our little heels while we watch cringey tv. we are busy - sorry! as an apology, we have pre-filled the island with every bland, mediocre, unscented thing we could find. the island has the texture of american cheese. the island has an ocean that never gets angry. the island is perfect for you, trust me. you will be so happy there - as happy as you can be, ironically.
we want to say we are sorry for doing harmless things that you find annoying, childish, or unappealing - but we are not sorry. we thought we could help you, because we don't mind laughing at ourselves, but it turns out you are allergic to color and noise and atmosphere, so this is the best that we can do for now. we are all making a big shirt that says i voted in the ironic monarchy. we got you one that is just a fast fashion buttondown. i am so excited for you and this island and the big life you have won. you have a cool jaded grey life and miles of irony to roam. i love you! be well.
now leave us alone.
#spilled ink#writeblr#slam poetry#i started this as a joke and ended up taking after#the poem about all the women in the world meeting in the bathroom#i can't find it to link it directly i've been googling for like 15 minutes if someone can remember#turns out frantically googling the only lines like ''women meeting in the bathroom''#''secret womens meeting you always believed happened" is not useful for . to search??? help :(#also the reason this says harmless so many times is bc like#this is 100% about like#yeah man when ppl are mean about ppl enjoying things like. fuckin lady gaga#like this is so obviously about ppl who steal ur joy for no reason (i WILL steal ur joy if ur a bigot btw)#also yes it's bc someone was like ''liking the mcelroys in 2023 is cringe''#and im like. dude what the fuck literally just let people like things it's LITERALLY not that deep.#like i dont like centipedes theyre one of like the 2 bugs im squicked out by ... but like.#if u really like centipedes. im like so happy for you. i hope you can put socks on ur centipedes#so they can speedclean ur floors. that would be fun and cool!!!#i love u i hope all of you have a weird passion i love you i hope that passion fills your life like soap bubbles
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He has!!! ARIVED!!!!!
He's here he's here he's here!!!!!! Safe and sound!!! We sat down and did some coloring together!!!!
And also made sure he met his new neighbors! Had a nice chat with my childhood stuffed animal! Asking all about what his new home is like. And of course, he had to meet Boober Fraggle!
Watched some Winnie the Pooh together! I think he really liked it. I hope he felt warm and welcomed in my home. A nice and cozy first day here!
#welcome home#wally darling#welcome home puppet show#welcome home arg#not art#i mean except for the crayon doodle-#nfndjfkdk#IM FILLED WITH SO MUCH JOY RN!!!!!#Hes HERE!! i keep grabbing his little face with my hand!#hes so sweet. hes so small!#AAAAA I GET TO SPIN HIM FOR REAL!!!!!!!!#PICKING HIM UP AND SPINNING HIM IRL!!!!!#I wanna get a lil voice box for him so bad.#Specifically of him saying “Keep your smile merry and always know that I love you. Very much.”#like you have no idea NO IDEA#i need to find one small enough though!!!!!!#and get help. cause haha i cannot sew#anyways!!!!!!!!!!!!! jdjfjdkkfkfj Celebrated with cartoons and cracked open a box of crayons just for him!#literally#ive been saving those crayons for when he got here. didnt open them till today!!!!#SPECIAL CRAYONS FOR SPECIAL MAN!#also cant not imagine him staring in awe at my rainbow keyboard. hed love that shit#sorry if this is too silly and sappy im just!!!! so happy right now!!!!!
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(CW for rapid color changes) TimeIasp of my isat anni piece!! Would've uploaded earlier but... forgor
#as usually gonna ramble in the tags for a bit but warning its gonna be more sappy than usual#because!! this piece!! is currently my most well receives piece on tumblr???#which i didnt??? expect???#so many people have said so many kind things in the rbs and#they all filled me with sm joy#i wish there was a way to thank them all similar to replying to comments#this is my first fanart for the fandom and its so well received....ueueueue#thank you for the supprt everyone!! and welcome to anyone new who joined my garden (followed my blog)#it mostly just exists....hope u have fun exisiting alongside me#yes im using this timelaspe post as an excuse to be sappy and grateful let me live#anyways tags:#rosiedraws#in stars and time#isat#isat siffrin#isat loop#mal du pays#isat spoilers#2hats spoilers#timelaspe#art timelasp
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HI!!!!! I JUST WANTED TO SHARE THESE WITH YALL! @for-a-good-time did some edits of a couple of my photos 🥲 and somehow despite the horrific lighting in my house, managed to edit these in a way that ACTUALLY shows how my makeup looks in person, color and all and I'm 💖😩 thank you because im obsessed with how you made my little clown face look
#maybe its aveline#chew toy sub#cnc brat#bd/sm brat#bd/sm kink#cnc sub#tpe sub#cnc free use#primal prey#primal kink#primal play#needy wh0re#cvm wh0re#attention wh0r3#fr33use slvt#good slvt#free use slvt#needy slvt#hi im going to screeeeeeeam a bit in the tags instead of filling them out#i really really love these and i do not care if you think im wearing too much of anything. i do it on purpose be QUIET 🤫#but legit he made me feel so fucking pretty doing these for me and then i forgot about them and he reminded me#and then the joy just POOF BOOM 💥 i just feel very pretty in a way that i dont know if ive ever felt 💖
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shut up
#transformers#maccadam#drama#i like the cover#people saying it's too 'sexy' are the problematic sexists#this same shit happened with z0ner's cover. yes i bullied her too because i believed the stupid shit you guys were saying#I MANAGED TO GROW UP BUT YOU PEOPLE ARE STILL DOING THIS TOXIC SEXIST ASS DANCE#i thought i was the bad person but honestly it's yall and your bullying asses#you're disgusting for bullying artists just because they draw women how they want#GROW UP.#I LOVE DRAWING CURVY SLIM SEXY ROBOT GIRLS#THERE'S NOTHING WRONG WITH THAT#WE SHOULD FILL THE WORLD WITH MORE OF THEM BECAUSE IT'S WHAT I WANT TO SEE#IF YOU WANT TO SEE SOMETHING ELSE... DO IT YOURSELF!!!! MAYBE ONE DAY THE COMPANY WILL LIKE YOUR ART ENOUGH TO HAVE IT ON A COVER#i like milne's stocky arcee just as much as average arcee from TFA just as much as svelte arcee in this cover#i really thought it was me that was why i left the fandom due to my ignorance but coming back and seeing this petty ass drama you guys#are unleashing... im realising that you guys are the problematic ones. omfg#you make it so unfun to be in this fandom. might as well publish the most recent animation i was working on then take the ones i've already#finished into hiding. you people suck the joy out of drawing for transformers.#transformers was my last bastion out of depression and you guys reminded me why people shouldn't get into transformers#getting back into tf revitalized my desire to draw and held me back from suicide. but knowing how toxic environment you guys are...#there's no reason to keep living with such inhospitable negative toxic bullies.
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can you imagine being Essek and watching this tiefling on a total power trip turn into a 10 feet tall--incredibly ripped??--god and kill the boy you're catching feelings for?? And brand you with some kind of evil cursed hivemind magic you're worried might corrupt you forever?? This thing that your friends swear was once family, but all you see is something monstrous and otherworldly and tearing himself apart at the seams, screaming when all their loved ones call out to him??
Just. the way it must have felt to see Lucien go from that to. Just the most sweet and affectionate little tiefling. Gentle and curious and so full of joy and wonder. He's got the brightest smile and warm eyes and this mischievous playfulness. He runs off at first--startled, scared. But then once he's calmed, the first real word he says other than Empty is Love. And right after that he calls out for his Magician, for this man who did everything he could to save him, held him close and kissed him so tenderly on the forehead--
And Caleb throws his arms around Essek and Veth and just watches the Nein all descend on Tealeaf and embrace him amidst laughter and tears and Molly's starting to smile again and Caleb's so so happy just to see him finally alive and.
In that moment, Essek understands why they came all this way--
#it is so so fascinating to me that deuces and ess knew lucien fIRST and i am so intrigued by how that would color their perception of#tealeaf when he's reborn#but also#there's something beautiful to me about seeing someone who you can't help seeing as a villain and a 'monster' just...finally break free#from these chains and become so warm and full of joy and love#seeing lucien melt as this gente affectionate tiefling who brings beau and yasha flowers and who gave everyone tiefling virtue names#also the implications of tealeaf calling the two members of the nein he doesnt recognize 'Empty'--deciding that theyre new#blank cards in the deck just waiting to be filled--#anyway sorry this was in my drafts and im just going through them now so heres this--
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screaming crying puking shitting pissing why doesnt anybody love farkas why does everyone shit all over him why do they agree with his baseless self-deprecation why why why why why
#he is so smart!!! he is so fuckign smart but everyone just treats him like shit#its genuinely so fucking depressing that he's just convinced that he's everything his brother is but Less#like no dude!!! youre literally so much More!!!!!#like i just want to give farkas a hug and lots of verbal reassurance#like everytime he says some shit ab like “oh youre probably looking for my brother hes the smart one :/” i wanna scream#like no baby im looking for you!! came here for You!! i hate this werewolf shit but i love you so im gonna fuckin do it!!#hes not a fucking icebrain hes a fireheart he has great joy and love burning within!!!!!#plus its dumb as FUCK for literally ANY of the companions to call him stupid. like you FUCKING RAISED HIM#if hes that fuckign dumb why didnt you guys.....oh idk...... fucking TEACH HIM BETTER#like eat shit i hate them tbh#and FUCK kodlak for that whole “hes too kindhearted” bullshit fuck you#fuck you kodlak youre so filled w heart that you wanna go to sovngarde you bitch you dont get to say shit ab other people's hearts#PLUS THE FACT THAT IT IMPLIES THAT BEING KIND = BEING UNINTELLIGENT#like FUCK that shit fuck that shit!!!!! you literally cannot be truly smart without also being truly kind!!!!!!!! its fuckin impossible!!!#farkas the smartest one in there frfr#personal#skyrim#farkas
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@starrysnowdrop I am very not good at sending messages [anxious as I be! Phobias of talking and all that!] but I doodle! And \o/ I adore these two very much and thank you for sharing them!! And your kind words! :D I am enamoured with the colors of your gposes and the themes you incorporate into them!
\o/ I hope you have a wonderful day!!
#starrysnowdrop#Hali is a wonderful character who is super well designed and fun to read about! Filled with love from the writer and it comes across!#part of me wants to paint this sketch cause the vibe is so cute... so i may do that sometime...#I've also learned from the love of Krile and the growing pure unashamed joy of lalafells I just love drawing them??#I'm having a wonderful time.#also im getting better at drawing canon characters and my fear of that so thats neat#[mun art]
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please Please PLEASE everyone go read Like Every Tree Stands on Its Own by @mightybog it is phenomenal and has deliciously altered my brain chemistry. AND there's a sequel in the works which is sure to be just as marvelous and heartwrenching and beautiful as the first.
Seriously, I have been rotating this story for days, even made some picrews about it (courtesy of ElenaA's Kiss Crew, beloved).
Anyway, please go read and kudos and comment and show her some love because she deserves it.
#bbc merlin#merthur#merlin#arthur#like every tree stands on its own#fic rec#arthur pendragon#there are so many moments im still not and never will be over#merlin and gwendydd discussing arthur's death#the love confession#the brilliant weaving in of quest for camelot story beats particularly the ones associated with if i didnt have you#arthur talking to hunith near the end#the end itself#OHHHHHH THE END#and just merlin and arthur and the way they orbit each other and draw each other in#such a perfect balance of angst and joy#the hurt/comfort is exactly the dosage i require#as is the silly fun and love#also the way that so many legends and myths and pieces of arthuriana are woven together into something so tight knit - perfection#feeds my inner arthurian maniac in the best way#dont think i told you that yet mightybog dear but you should know#been obsessed with the arthurian legend for longer than i can remember and this filled every nook and cranny of my arthurian soul
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You got it. Food is served, cash 🍽
#also woahh first ask ?!!?!#i hope u like it#i hope it fills u with joy to see that i answered with more jazz#i want to draw more i really did but yk how it goes 💔#OH and to anyone else reading these tags i'll gladly take transformer drawing requests js as long as they aren't weird if ykyk#but yk im bound to draw more jazz in the future#hes just too awesome and full of swag#transformers#transformers fanart#asks#jazz transformers#transformers g1#art#my art#chey art#maccadam#chey's asks
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seeing colin "man reborn" hughes talking with his gay dad in the lockeroom looking like the weight has been lifted from his shoulders has healed something in me
#ted lasso spoilers#im at a loss for words#he just seems so happy#and trent is overjoyed#seeing colin go from the ache in amsterdam#to floating in the locker room#just their presence together in the locker room speaks so much#(that i ironically cant put it into words)#my heart is filled with joy#trent crimm#colin hughes#ted lasso
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H E L L O ?!?!?!
#it’s 1:40 am as i’m drafting this and i had to make sure it was actually real#love when fandoms im in trend out of no where fills me with joy and such unimaginable dread#immediately just ‘oh god what happened’ and mentally preparing myself for something either really good or really bad#either way i typically get to see pretty art so not a total loss#trollhunters#3below#wizards#toa#penny lake#my fic
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