#im gonna be honest i just added her cause it felt right

[justanothersquidblog]

The Cuntification of Acht Ahato Mizuta Dedf1sh

[hunterwritings]

I love your Miguel with a bubbly reader! Can we please see more of it? Like maybe Miguel is scolding the other Spiders and Reader walks in and Miguel is like a whole new person but still wants to murder the other Spiders? It makes me think of the tik tok where its like "IM GOING TO KILL THE NEXT PERSON I SEE" *Reader walks in* "Hi honey!" *Miguel with heart eyes* "Your back! I missed you so much (insert Miguel gushing about how much he loves Reader in front of Spiders)"

THIS IS THE TROPE I LIVE FOR

only for you | miguel o'hara

summary: Miguel acts like a completely different person with you around. warnings: none | wc: 1075

"How could you let something like this happen?!"

Miguel was seething; Miles swears he could almost see smoke coming out of his ears. The spider teens had almost disrupted another canon event and almost caused the universe to collapse.

"Listen Miguel, I know the kids made some mistakes but, that's exactly what they were! Mistakes!" Peter B. Parker tried to reason with him, with his hands stretched out and a stupid smile on his face.

"You want to put the fate of the multiverse on a goddamn mistake? I will not risk that." Miguel fired back.

"To be honest, I don't know what the big deal is, they ended up fixing it." Peter added. Miguel snapped his head around to face him, his eyes would be burning holes through him if looks could kill.

"No Peter, you don't understand the importance of this! And clearly, neither do you all!" He said, gesturing towards the teens. "It just shows that you are just as responsible as a child! So Peter, do yourself a favor, and shut the hell up." Miguel had venom laced in his words.

"Ooo...kay." Peter responded, shaking his head and pursing his lips together.

"Miguel, we know that we made mistakes and we are sorry, it will never happen again." Gwen tried to apologize genuinely to him.

"Uh, I don't apologize actually, I see nothin' wrong with what we did-" Hobie protested, Pavitr elbowed him to signal him to stop.

"You all know exactly what we do here, you know the importance of keeping everything in line. I'm this close to kicking you all out of Spider Society!" He yells, showing his fingers pinched together.

"You can't kick us out if we all quit!" Hobie laughs.

"Hobie!" Gwen snaps her head around at him.

"I- I- I can't even deal with you right now!" Miguel holds his pointer finger and thumb to his temples as he turns his back to them.

Just then, you swing in from the other side of him and jump down to land next to him. "Hi Miguel." You smile as he turns to look at you.

"Gracias a Dios [thank god], I'm so glad you're here (Y/N)." He seemed to have relief flow into his body as he reached over a pulled you into his chest. You chuckled in surprise from the sudden affection as he tightly wraps his arms around your shoulders. "Felt like I was about to lose it in a couple more seconds." He whispers into your ear.

"Well luckily, I showed up right on time then." You giggle as he lets you go and you look up at him with a smile.

"You have no idea." He smirked and shook his head.

"Oh thank god you're here (Y/N), I was afraid he was gonna start biting soon!" Peter laughed as you turned around to face the group. Miguel stared him down.

"Soo, what's going on here?" You curiously ask.

"Trying to have a serious conversation with people who have no respect for what we do around here." He snaps to them.

"Don't look at me! I wasn't even there, I'm just trying to stand up for the kids!" Peter says, holding his hands up in defense. Miguel just groans and shakes his head.

"Oh Miguel, maybe you should go a little easy on them." You say, walking up to him. He rests his hands on your hips and sighs when you lie your hand on his cheek. "I mean, we should be happy that no one got hurt and the universe is still intact." you smile at him and he matches your smile.

He hums in response. "Plus, I think this lecture will scare them enough to where this shouldn't happen again." You add.

"You'd be surprised how many of these talks I've had." He scoffs and smirks.

You laughed loudly. "Just remember they're kids and they're trying their best." You smiled and he nodded. "Be easy on them." You added.

"I will." He said softly.

You grinned before leaning up and pulling his neck down to pull him into a sweet kiss. You felt him smile against your lips as he hummed. You pulled away and smiled at him before hearing a beeping on your watching.

"Oh, I've got a situation going on in my universe." You say tapping the hologram on your wrist.

"You need any help with it?" Miguel asks, ready to leave in a second if asked him to.

"No, it's nothing major, don't worry. It shouldn't take that long, I should be back before dinner." You say, pressing another quick kiss to his lips before turning and walking the other way.

"Oh! Maybe I'll grab some food from that Italian place we always go to!" You say, walking backwards to face him and smiling widely while opening up a portal behind you.

"Sounds like a good plan, my love." He agrees with a smile.

You chuckle before pulling down your mask and jumping into the portal as it closes.

Miguel's smile lingers on his face before seeing Peter B. Parker in his peripheral before he slung his arm around his shoulder and laughed. "Oh wow, you really love them huh? I can tell by the way you don't act like a raging monster when they're around." He jokes as Miguel just stares ahead, his demeanor was agitated. "Get off of me, Peter." He said with no emotion.

"Okay, not gonna risk getting my arm torn off today." He says, backing off from Miguel.

"Aw, seems like you're really in love, eh?" Hobie jokes and Gwen shoves him slightly.

"You're not helping, Hobie." Miles says anxiously.

"I'm not trying to." Hobie says in all seriousness.

"Okay, everyone out. We're done here. " Miguel says with his back turned to them and his hands on his hips.

"Let's leave before he changes his mind." Gwen whispers to the rest of them.

"If I have to do this again for any of you, it's gonna be the last time." Miguel warns as he points at them.

"Yes Miguel, we understand and we promise." Gwen says genuinely.

Miguel sighs and turns his back to them as they all turn to leave the room. A slight smile came to face at the thought of you prancing back into his space with food in hand. He stood and watched his communicator in case you needed his help, and waited for you to come back.

[toomanyopinionss]

Scattered thoughts after watching the finale of GEN V

Spoilers Ahead

i forgot how ANGRY homelander makes me. like i haven’t seen that awful mf in my screen in a minute but the candle full of rage i hold for this man is clearly not snuffed out. mr. how to ruin everything in 45 seconds or less. fvck homelander

lord, and the RACISM of this whole thing just has me so fvcking heated, because of course the two pretty cis white kids are the heroes (even though one of them supposed to be dead according to public records, and the other ones boyfriend killed the mf principal) and not the top ranked kids in school, three of which are poc and queer (possibly all queer, emma gives off a vibe). like emma, marie, jordan, and andre are arguably 4 of the most decent students on this campus. the only thing marie has done is fucking exist, and the world has just delivered nothing but awfulness to her. gtfo of here, im so upset.

if the term “morally gray” was a universe it would be this one. cause fuck indira but fuucccckkkkk homelander.

if they don’t do right by andre, im going to be so pissed. the fact that this episode showcased the most of him we’ve seen as a character and it was still half-assed?? i want moreeee

bruh, i know in the battle between action/drama and romance, that the former has to take precedence in this type of story, but even emma and sam got a fucking conversation. are you so serious? limoreau didn’t have time for a 2 minute discussion about their relationship??? the writers could have added a couple more minutes to this 30 minute episode? it’s been CRICKETS y’all, and i demand reparations. i mean we’re not gonna see them again for another, what… 2 years??The jordan and marie moments are so cute, don’t get me wrong, but they are minuscule after episode 5. I be having to run to fan fiction just to satisfy my need for emotional closure. do better

CATE. now ms. gorl, we were rooting for you. and you went and made a mess of things. and quite frankly, trying to get to jordan destroyed my last string of patience for her ass, and it was already fraying the minute she messed with sam. i am officially un-identifying as a cate apologist. if we bein honest, marie should have gone for the other hand too.

bruh, lowkey loved sam’s arch this episode, i don’t know. his character intrigues me, and he’s been through so much stuff, i just wanna give him a hug. When he said “I hate myself.” i felt like crying. homelander needs to keep his greasy no good, bloody mf hands off of him, i swear

Ok this is getting lengthy

i love this show and it’s characters, for the record, in case that wasn’t clear lol

8.5/10

[flimsyichigo]

ok so i promised an update so here’s part of an update of something pretty crazy that’s happened to me

back in mid february, i was chilling in my favorite elective class when my friend, lets call him ryan, asked if i heard anything interesting happening in school.

i told him nah not really. it’s mainly stuff personal to me. so he then asked if i like somebody. i was like YEAH. obviously he asked who it was so I told him to guess and that it was one of his friends. He couldn’t guess who so I just told him the name.

there was this girl in our table so overheard and wanted to know, i’ll call her jane. i only knew jane for over a month or so but we had a lot of mutual friends and her boyfriend is good friends with my crush. plus she just seemed SO sweet and trusting at the time so i just told her. she just seemed so giddy and happy for me after i did so. this is a very important detail. SHE KNEW.

so then my friend, ryan, offered to be my wingman and despite him being a fucking goof a majority of the time, i knew i could trust him cause this involves one of his closest friends and ryan has NEVER done me dirty b4. a week or so later, he told me his plan to help me out. the plan was asking my crush who he was gonna ask to prom and basically listing a bunch of people he could take so ryan could subtly include my name and see how this guy felt about me. to be honest this was a great fucking plan. almost everybody i told this story to said it was a good ass plan.

so on that friday (the day before spring break btw), i saw ryan after lunch right before our class and asked if he did it. he said yes. i asked if it went well. he shook his head no in pity… my stomach fucking DROPPED. i spent nearly the entirety of that same elective class i mentioned earlier just sitting there all gloomy and shit. even my absolute sweetheart of a teacher asked if i was ok.

ryan wanted to tell me what exactly happened so fucking bad and kept insisting but i was like NAHHH that’s gonna break me for sure. that same jane girl i mentioned earlier said she was there when it happened. so i asked her if it was as bad as my friend described it. she instantly nodded which made me feel so much worse.

so that class ended meaning spring break officially started. i was just fucking ruminating on my walk home wondering what the fuck happened. a few days into break, my curiosity was eating at me so i called ryan and asked him to explain EVERYTHING that happened on friday.

so what happened was ryan went over to where my crush was sitting during lunch and started asking him about prom dates. the plan was instantly shut down when my crush essentially said “ehh i don’t know jane told me that [my name] likes me.” he then added that he thought i looked like a guy(ahhh closeted trans guy tings😜😜) so basically he wasn’t interested. you see i wasn’t upset abt what he said about me. i know the way i dress and the way i present myself and im proud of it even if i am doing an awful job at being closeted.

now what i was upset abt was that mf jane girl deciding to TELL HIM I LIKED HIM some fucking reason??? she had no real fucking reason to do that shit. the whole point was to be subtle about it and see what he thought of me. if he was interested, then sick i’ll make some moves. if he wasn’t, then cool ima move on in silence; no harm done. but this girl HADDD to throw a fucking wrench in our plans. i was able to move on from my feelings for him easily after that but STILLL. it feels so weird now knowing that he knows i liked him. ideally i still would’ve been cool with him if he didn’t like me back because HE WAS NEVER SUPPOSED TO KNOW. ughhhhhhh now i know to never trust that mf jane againnnn.

anyways yap session over. make sure to like and subscribe to learn about more bullshit in my life. but for real, i’ve been gone for a good while now and i just felt like i owed yall an update bc i love yall sm.

[jeonfiles]

once more to see you | kth 01

pairing: taehyung x reader ft. seokjin

genre: angst, fluff, unrequited love

synopsis: taehyung is the complete opposite of you, and you're so in love with him. he's not interested in you at all, but he's willing to pretend so he won't be known for breaking the sweetest girl in school's heart. he knows you'll end up hurt either way.

warnings: taehyung is an idiot, a lot of pining, y/n is annoyingly dependent on validation, y/n does a lot of silent prayers, y/n is a track star, childhood bsf seokjin (cute), mentions of deceased family member

music for this chap: she had the world , carry me out

a/n: taehyung will disappoint u in the beginning but hes cute i promise

"I get why you like him Y/N," Sohee swallowed the rest of her sandwich before finishing her sentence, "He's so hot. People say he's interested in you too, y'know?"

Sohee visibly tried to get food out from the back of her mouth using her tongue, and it made you chuckle at the sight. "I don't think he does." You sighed, resting your chin in your palm.

You were both situated at the table in the inner corner of the cafeteria, with a full view of who walks in the door, and sometimes you swore you could see Sohee drool when attractive guys walked in that exact door.

"Hello, of course, he does! Even his friend Jimin told Kang Seulgi from Class 1, who told Go Euntaek in class 3, who eventually told his girlfriend Baek Ho-rang who ran to me to tell me the great news." Sohee gasped for air after rambling, and you rolled your eyes,

"Stories change when that many links contribute." You scoffed, sitting back in your chair and reaching for your juice box on the table, taking a huge slurp, which you knew would annoy Sohee.

"You don't believe me? Guess we gotta ask a link closer to the source then." Sohee stood up from her chair, and you looked at her with a raised eyebrow.

"Park Jimin, get your ass over here will ya?" She nearly shouted across the cafeteria, and now all looks were pointed at you two, and you felt the urge to just slip down the cracks of the floor tiles and hide there forever grow stronger for each nanosecond.

You sunk further down on your tacky, orange chair, but you could still see Jimin's black locks sway a little over the crowd as he walked over to the table you were sitting at.

"What's up sugar?" Jimin smirked at Sohee, and Sohee didn't even budge, and you had no idea how she did it. He was stupidly attractive and could make any girl drop her pants with a comment like that.

"Jimin my dearest, a little birdie told me that Taehyung likes my sweet Y/N, could you confirm?" She batted her long lashes and smiled prettily at Jimin.

He looked to the left, sucked his teeth, and said, "I can't, I'm sorry." You realized you had grown a little too hopeful, and your heart sunk quite a bit when he spoke.

"Does he think I'm pretty at least?" You spoke up, eyes shining when you looked up towards the standing Jimin, the harsh lights in the cafeteria reflecting in them.

"He hasn't mentioned you much, to be quite honest." He shrugged, walking back to his table, where Taehyung and the rest of his friends sat.

Your heart thumped when he met your eyes, and you looked away in panic. The rest of lunch was just Sohee apologizing and you avoiding eye contact with any of the students at the nearby tables.

Jimin mentioned you and Sohee's name several times, he was a loud speaker, and you were so scared of what he was saying you could probably die right then and there.

Saved by the bell, you picked up your stuff and got ready to start running to your classroom, praying you wouldn't meet any of Taehyung's friends, and especially not Taehyung as you ran Usain Bolt style.

You looked down while running, not thinking twice about leaving your best friend behind, you suddenly fell to the ground with a thud. This was surely not one of your glory days.

When you looked up, you wanted to cry. It was none other than Kim Taehyung, and he didn't look pleased. You gathered your things and muttered "Sorry." under your breath probably about 10 times, and he just watched, disappointingly.

"You're a klutz. Why were you running?" He spoke, and your knees turned into jelly when you tried to stand up, you nearly fell and dropped all your stuff again, but he caught you by the arm, straightening you up like it was nothing.

"Uh... Uhm... Err..." you mumbled, and he rolled his eyes, and not in a joking manner. "Fuck that, why are you going around telling people I like you?"

Your breath hitched, and he stared at you coldly. "I didn't! Gosh, my friend Sohee told me someone had told her that you liked me, and- uh... We asked Jimin, and-" He put his hand over your mouth, making you shut up.

"I don't want you two to go around making up baseless rumors about me, it's incredibly annoying for me to go around correcting people who assume shit just because your little friend speaks louder than a bunch of hyenas at a tea party." Taehyung nearly spat, and you took a step back.

You noticed that people were listening in, their stares burning holes in your back. He was livid, and you didn't understand why, you just smiled, praying to god that this would end soon.

"I just thought you liked me-" You began, and he interrupted you, "You thought I was gonna like someone like you? Get over yourself and enter the real world."

The hallway went silent, your lips trembled as hot tears raced down your face, and like the track star you were, you fled the scene and passed the finish line into the bathrooms.

You stayed till the school day ended, not knowing what was unraveling outside the four walls of the stall.

Sohee 💜: 01:12 pm

Y/N, where are you? i heard what happened :( i hate taehyung im gonna chop his sausage off

Sohee 💜: 01:38 pm

taehyung is fighting w doyoung because doyoung decided to defend you this is hilarious

but fr where are you

Sohee 💜: 01:57 pm

doyoung gave taehyung a black eye damn

doyo is on the verge of tears when taehyung said you liked him and not doyo

taehyung cant not have feelings for you like there must be smth deeper going on

Sohee 💜: 03:39 pm

class just ended i'll wait out back

Sohee always knew when to leave you alone, so she did, partially. You usually shut off your phone when you're upset, but she still sends you texts to update you whenever you turn it back on.

This time, it was quite dramatic, and you rushed out of the icky stall and ran (again) to reach Sohee to get the full story, and as you expected, it was interesting.

"Basically, Doyoung punched Taehyung and Taehyung was a little too OP, so he failed to initiate a fight, so it just turned into Taehyung being an ass to Doyoung for defending you." She shrugged, adjusting the straps of her leather backpack as you walked home.

"Taehyung's rep is so tainted right now, I don't know how he's gonna fix this my dear Y/N, so I guess he got his karma. He's an idiot and I'm glad other people are starting to see."

You nodded yes, pushing out a fake chuckle, while silently you prayed that everything would soon be back to normal and that Taehyung would forgive you for the mess you caused.

Being in love with Taehyung for a year had taken a toll on you, and your best friend since freshman year had noticed too. You were different.

You used to be so independent and optimistic, but now you would strive for validation, and you had turned into one of the most insecure people Sohee had ever met.

Sohee tried to pull you away from him, but to her demise, it only got worse when you tried to meet other guys. She figured that the only way for you to disconnect from him was if you had your go with him, or if he treated you like a complete idiot.

You waved goodbye to Sohee as you entered your house, kicking off your shoes and throwing yourself down on the couch. You wanted to scream, but you saw your brother's and another guy's shoes in your hallway, so you kept it inside.

After having watched an episode of Seinfeld, you could hear the floorboards creak, and your gaze found its way to the hallway, where your brother, Yoongi stood, peeking out from his door.

"Ah, Y/N, you're the one who's home?" He smiled brightly, eyes turning into small crescents, which made you awe at the sight.

"Yuppers." You said and sat back again, pressing play to start the next episode. "Who's your guest?" And as you uttered your last word, another head peeked out from the door, and you couldn't help but feel the happiness brew inside you.

It was Kim Seokjin in all his glory, and this time, he looked even hotter. It had been about two years since you last saw him because he moved to Germany to study medicine.

Seokjin had been your neighbor since you were born, and you pretty much grew up with two older brothers who always took care of you.

No one dared to mess with you, because Seokjin and Yoongi always got to them first. That way, you grew up without a care in the world, protected from all evil.

You had no idea when you fell in love with him. It was somewhere during puberty, where your interest in Brad Pitt and Kim Soohyun from Dream High had grown stronger.

You remember Seokjin was scouted for modeling, acting, and even idol groups all through your childhood. He did a few ads, photoshoots, a popular teenage drama called Double Trouble, and even managed to get his own Wikipedia page.

There was no doubt that Seokjin was an attractive man, and in the two years he had been gone, his face fat was completely gone, and he had defined cheekbones, a slimmer and tighter figure, and you thought he couldn't be any more perfect.

"None other than God himself," Seokjin said smugly, opening his arms to greet you with a hug, and you threw your blanket you were covered into the side as you bolted into Seokjin's arms, legs wrapped around his waist.

He slowly put you down so your feet touched the parquet, and you felt a kind of euphoria as he smiled at you again, the same smile he had flashed you as long as you could remember.

Everything about Seokjin had matured and changed, but his smile remained the same. "What are you doing back?" You sniffled, holding back the happy tears that were forming in your eyes.

"Hey, don't get me wrong, I love Germany, but it's a little bland. I miss ahjumnas complimenting me on the subway and the bomb ass food here in SK." Seokjin grinned as he wiped a tear that fell down your face.

Yoongi was leaning against the door frame, smiling at the grand reunion. You knew he liked seeing you two together, and you had a small suspicion about him shipping you guys.

"Please don't ever leave again." You gripped onto his shirt, digging your face down in his chest, and he said, "I swear to god if you're wearing makeup right now-"

You laughed as you pushed him away, placing your hands below your chin and batting your eyelashes dramatically, "I'm all-natural."

"Naturally pretty." Seokjin leaned forward and whispered in your ear, and your heart did a little somersault.

Seokjin's always been a charmer.

You woke up in your room, pink sheets draped over your half-naked body as tons of messages poured in on your phone, vibrating so much it nearly fell off the edge of your nightstand.

You grab it while rubbing your eyes, and you're shocked to see the messages that had exploded on your lock screen.

Unknown: 08:39 am

Hey, it's Kim Taehyung.

Look, I'm sorry for the shit I said to you and I would love to make it up to you in some kind of way.

Maybe I could take you out?

I get it if you don't want to, but I heard you were interested in me so...

What kinda food do you like? Activities, hobbies?

I really wanna make this right :)

You: 08:43 am

oh hey! I'd love to, you kinda owe me one. if it's your treat, I suppose we could get some sushi and boba...

btw I don't like u like that

Contact made, saved as "taehyung <3" at 08:44 am

taehyung <3: 08:47 am

Okay. Meet me at Nori Table at 6 pm. Don't make me wait.

Your heart was palpitating, and when you pressed your phone up to your chest, you could feel your body heat up from your scalp to your toes.

Maybe Kim Taehyung had no interest in you right now, but he sure would after tonight. You were gonna make him love you, soon enough,

Running to the shower a few hours of Seinfeld later, you scrubbed with all your might with your newest strawberry scrub, did your makeup, curled your hair, and sat down on the couch, outfit draped over the armrest of the chair.

It was an hour till you were leaving, so for the time being you sat with hair rollers in your hair, dressed in pink sweats. Seokjin and Yoongi had been awake all night, you had heard them laugh and play Mario Cart all night, it reminded you of old times.

Old times where you went to bed crying because Yoongi and Seokjin's bedtime was later than yours at sleepovers. Thinking back, your parents made a pretty rational decision, but you resented them for it.

When Seokjin left for school in Germany, during your Sophomore year you cried again. You thought it was so unfair that you had to be two years younger, why couldn't you come with him?

You were painfully in love with him, and you had been probably since you were. A few months after he moved, your feelings faded. You were love-free, only to fall stupidly in love again with Taehyung just a year later.

You were forced to snap out of your train of thought because you heard the floorboards creak again. When you looked over at the dark hallway, you saw a tired, yet familiar face smile at you.

Seokjin looked quite disoriented, hair ruffled and eyes puffy, yet he looked like a Greek god. Sculpted to perfection, he smiled at you like he did yesterday and all the times before.

"Morning." He grunted out, his morning voice prominent. You chuckled when you looked at the time, feeling kind of bad for Seokjin who had slept away the majority of his day, which you knew he didn't like.

"It's 5 pm, cutie. Mom said you guys could order takeout, cause she's working late." You stood up, and Seokjin gave you a good look up and down, and then diverted his gaze to the lavender ruffle skirt and white long-sleeve blouse you had neatly hung over the armchair.

"What's the occasion?" He nodded over at the clothes and then your hair rollers and full-face makeup-covered face. He threw a few walnuts from the little bowl on the coffee table into his mouth.

"It's none of your business, but I have a date tonight," you said smugly, and a walnut flew out of Seokjin's mouth in shock.

"A date? Like a real one?" He frantically asked, and you nodded as you walked away with your outfit in hand.

You came back out minutes later, and Seokjin had to hold his mouth shut so it wouldn't drop to the floor. You had matured so well, a white blouse adorning your waist, and the lavender skirt hugged your curves nicely.

You had decorated your neck and ears with golden jewelry, and you had a pair of Air forces dangling from your left hand. You were beautiful, hair let free from the hair rollers, curls swaying as you did a twirl.

"It's alright, I guess." He pretended not to care, and your proud grin morphed into a frown pretty quickly, and he noticed.

He stood up and walked towards you, standing very close. His tall figure was hovering over you. Seokjin leaned forward towards your ear, not whispering this time,

"You're gorgeous." He pushed your curls behind your shoulder, adjusting your golden necklace as he returned to Yoongi's bedroom.

You were screwed.

The time on your phone showed 6:06 pm. You recall him saying ‘don’t be late’. What a hypocrite. It had started to pour down, so you were squeezed up against the brick wall of the restaurant so the ledge above you would shield you from the rain.

You were shaking from the cold, legs exposed because of your skirt. Sighing deeply, you reached down into your purse to text Taehyung, but when you looked up, you saw him running over to you.

He was holding a bouquet of pink delphinium and peonies. You’d always been interested in flowers, and this small gesture made you all fuzzy inside.

“I apologize for my late arrival m’lady. The flower shop was about to close down for the day, and I had to beg the cashier to let me in, promising to buy a huge bouquet if she did.” He smiled as he stood in front of you.

“No worries sir, I haven’t been waiting for long.” You chuckled, as you accepted the bouquet. His eyes scanned every inch of your body, and he said, “You’re shivering. Let’s go inside.”

This was a side of Taehyung you had barely seen before, caring and warm. This was also the side of him that initially made you fall for him.

The memories of him reading stories for children at the hospital was heartwarming. Whenever you went to visit your brother, who has now passed, you would see him read stories for all the unlucky kids.

Your brother, who was only 7 years old talked about Taehyung like a superhero, and it seemed as if Taehyung’s stories were the highlight of his days at the hospital.

Daejung wasn’t a kid you would pity. In his last months in the hospital he never once cried. You believed that Taehyung was a big part of the reason.

That’s why you fell in love with him. He hadn’t been a superhero in the form of saving lives, but he definitely made a whole lot of sick kids happier.

How could you ever repay him?

Taehyung rested a hand on your shoulder and lead you inside the door, and there stood a beautiful tall woman, black hair to her waist, almond-shaped eyes, and full lips.

She was beautiful. You looked up to see Taehyung’s reaction, and he wasn’t looking at her, he was looking at you. His eyes met yours, and you could’ve sword the whole world stopped.

“Excuse me?” An unfamiliar voice spoke up, and it kicked you right back into reality. It was the pretty woman speaking, an even prettier voice to match her.

“Do you have a reservation?” She questioned, smiling so genuinely from ear to ear. “Yes. It’s on Kim.” Taehyung spoke so confidently.

“Ah, for two. I’ll be your server tonight.” She waved for you to follow her, and before she turned around, you saw her name tag.

Bae Eunmi. A pretty name for a pretty person. Of course, she had to be pretty. Your confidence sunk even lower, and your insecurities grew.

“I’m not interested in her, by the way. I’ve talked to her before. She’s all beauty and no brains. Not for me.” Taehyung whispered into your ear, possibly to reassure you.

You sat down at the table and ordered a huge plate of different types of sushi, maki, nigiri, uramaki, and even sashimi.

This restaurant was fancy, nearly too fancy for your liking. It was huge and flashy, and it made you doubt your outfit choice completely.

The restaurant fell silent since there weren’t many guests here this early. The silence wasn’t awkward between you guys. It was just, too silent, and you decided to break it.

“Do you still write stories?” Taehyung’s face froze. How did you know about the stories he wrote? Had you been stalking him? Was this when everyone would find out how weak he truly is?

“How did you find out... About them?” He asked hesitantly, fidgeting with a small woven basket with bread placed on your table.

“When sun and moon met, moon felt bad. When the moon was alone at night, he cried, because he wanted to shine just like the sun.” You quote his story word by word, it was your favorite paragraph.

He looked at you with a confused look and his eyes told you that he wondered why you knew the story so well.

Before he could speak up, you said, “My brother's name was Daejung. He looked up to you and constantly told me about how he wanted to be like you when he grew up.” You placed your hands on top of his over the table.

Taehyung was speechless. He sat there, body completely frozen as he processed what you just said. The little boy he had mourned for many months was the same flesh and blood as you.

“Daejung told me how he wanted me to marry you because he thought no one else deserved me.” Letting go of his hands, he continued sitting completely still.

First, he felt disappointed in himself. Disappointed of the way he had treated you, how sad Daejung would be if he knew.

Second, he could see him in your traits. Your button nose matched his completely, and your eyes sparkled just the way his eyes did.

Third, he realized he had to take care of you. Fall in love with you, for Daejung. Taehyung had promised the little boy to take care of his friends and family when he has at his worst.

His expression completely changed. It softened, and his eyes looked at you like you were godsent. He believed you were too. It was fate.

join the “once more to see you” taglist

a/n: u guys know the angst isn't over lol u guys r never gonna see the light at the end of the tunnel ! this chapter was originally a bit longer but i have to test the waters and seeing how u guys like it !! pls reblog <3

[jisungsplatforms]

[Chapter V: Han Jisung, you irresistible young man!]

Pairing: Producer/Music Major! Han Jisung x Photographer! fem! reader

Genre: NSFW! Smut; non idol au, college au, strangers to lovers

Warnings: Mature Content! language, mentions of homicide (no one actually dies!), oral sex (m. rec) (yes again), exhibitionism

Chapter Word Count: 4.2k words

Taglist: @hyunjeongins @seungstarss @es-kay-zee @hyunjinsplaything @formidxble @freckledquokka @lbxgsunshine @cartierbin @solistired @rainbowmagicpixecorn @http-hyxnjxn @dwaebinnie @gothmingguk @minniehohos

Unable to tag: @kayannainsworth19

(want to be added? send an ask or a dm! <3)

“You’re evil,” Jisung pouted, pulling down on his oversized shirt to cover his still semi-hard on as the two of you walked down the hall. You snickered, enjoying the way he walked almost painfully.

“Sorry,” you grinned. “But it was fun, wasn’t it?”

“For you!” he cried. He leaned closer to your ear and hissed quietly, “You’re not the one who has a boner!” You quickened your pace, turning your head to throw a wink and a kiss. Jisung grumbled, awkwardly waddling faster to catch up to you. “Minx. You evil she-devil of a minx!”

“Hey, is it my fault you get horny easily?”

“Yes! It’s you, for fucks sake! Have you seen yourself?” he huffed. “You’re on my mind 24/7, do you even know how much you affect me?”

Your heart raced. You rolled your eyes and laughed him off, hoping that he wouldn’t notice your flustered expression. Scoffing playfully, you said, “Now that sounds like a you problem, doesn’t it?”

“Y/n~! Stop!” he whined.

You briefly glanced at his reddened face and sighed. “Okay, okay. Fine. I’m sorry. I’ll make it up to you, promise.” You were about to enter the canteen until Jisung grabbed your wrist.

“I know how you can make it up,” he said with a somewhat timid look. He took a deep breath before stating more boldly. “Go on a date with me.”

Your eyes widened in shock. “Wh-what?”

“Let’s go on a date. After school. Tonight.” Jisung stared at you with a newfound determination meanwhile your face grew hotter and hotter by the second. You stared at his reddened face, contemplating, before sighing.

“What time?”

“Oh, what? Seriously?” he gaped. “Holy shit. YES!” He threw his fists up in the air, hollering. “Oh my God, fuck yeah!”

You couldn’t help but laugh as he rejoiced, despite the slight embarrassment you felt from the scene he was causing. Putting your hands on his shoulders, you camly shushed him with a smile. “Sorry, I was just—wow. I really landed a date with the hottest person I know,” he chuckled sheepishly as he rubbed the top of his fluffy blond hair.

You giggled, moving his hand away from his head to hold it instead. “Better show up all dolled up for me, pretty boy.”

“Pff, I always look good, Y/n. What’re you talking about?” Jisung smirked, obnoxiously holding his head up high. You rolled your eyes at his playful arrogance.

“Watch it. I can change my mind anytime.”

“I know you won’t.” He brought your entwined hands up to his lips to kiss your knuckles. The rate of your heart beat increased, body tingling in adoration. Jisung smiled, letting go of your hand. “Gotta go now, I need to work on some stuff with Chan and Changbin today, but I’ll see you later, yeah?”

“Yup, see you soon!” You waved goodbye as Jisung walked away. He was only 5 steps in when he turned around and started walking backwards to speak.

“Tonight’s gonna be a surprise! Just be ready by 6, okay?” he called out.

“Okay!” You watched his retreating figure until he was halfway out of the hall. You walked happily into the canteen, thinking about your date with Jisung.

‘5:56pm’

It’s been 5 minutes since you’ve been mindlessly brushing the ends of your hair. Placing the brush back down onto your coffee table, you stood up to check your outfit on the reflection of the blackened TV screen for the umteenth time, bending down to sweep off any dust from your flowy pants. Now, you weren’t typically the type to obsess over your appearance, but tonight is certainly an exception, right? Grabbing the lip balm in your bag, you slathered on a thin layer of the sweet scented stick, smacking your lips together with a ‘pop’, and placed back inside. A notification went off from your phone. Recognizing the unique ringtone immediately, you hastily bent down to grab it.

1 new message(s) from Hannie Bear 🍯🧸

Hannie Bear 🍯🧸: im outside!

Me: Coming out now!

You rushed to the front door, grabbing your keys and switching off the lights in the living room in the process. You double checked everything in your apartment one last time before leaving.

“Hey.”

You jolted in surprise seeing Jisung leaning on the wall right in front of your door. “What the fuck, Jisung, you scared me!”

“Sorry,” he laughed, standing up straight. “I saw Hyunjin earlier and told him about our date. He looked pretty excited.”

“Yeah?” you said as you turned around to lock your door. “Is that why you were standing in front of my door like a creep?”

You giggled at Jisung’s incredulous expression. “I wouldn’t say ‘like a creep’ but yeah, he’s the reason why I found your apartment.”

“Still sounds like a creeper thing to do,” you teased. “I never told you exactly where I lived, that’s lowkey freaky.”

“Oh, uh...Sorry?”

You walked up to him, smiling at his embarrassed face. “It's okay. You’re cute so I’ll allow it.” Grabbing his hand, you led him to the elevator. “Let’s go?”

Jisung instantly smiled, walking fast so he can be the one leading you instead. “Mhm!”

Instead of driving or taking a taxi, the two of you walked. Not that you mind, at least the night was cool enough for you to not sweat. “So? Where are you taking me first?”

“Hey, didn’t I tell you tonight is a surprise?” Jisung grinned. “No questions, no doubting. Just trust me tonight.”

“Well, for all I know, you might be a murderer luring me out for my last night.”

“Please. If I was a murderer, I would’ve killed Hyunjin and Felix for stealing my cheesecake earlier.”

You snorted. “Wait, you like cheesecake?”

“Yup! And chocolate cake! God, I love those.” He looked at you excitedly. “I think it was my mom who got me into cheesecake? She isn’t the type to like sweets that much but cheesecake is the only dessert she genuinely loves.”

“Really?”

“Yeah! I remember my brother and I used to go to the store a lot to buy it for her.”

“Cute,” you giggled. You walked a few more blocks before Jisung stopped you.

“Aaand...We’re here!” You looked past him to see a small Italian restaurant. The inside looked homey, not too extravagant, with only a handful of customers inside. It had a minimalistic vibe that you very much enjoyed.

You couldn't help but chuckle. “Cheesy” you joked. “Were you hoping we would ‘Lady and the Tramp’ this?”

“Oh my God,” he gasped exaggeratedly, “that would've been so cool! But no, I heard from Minho one time that you like pasta, so I did some research and found this comfy, and more importantly, affordable place!”

“Aww,” you cooed. “You did research for me?”

“Psh, of course I did! I wanted to impress you,” he said cockily. “So, are you?”

You laughed, shaking your head. “Oh yeah, very much impressed.” You reached over to pat his leather jacket. “Especially with this sexy jacket you’re wearing.” Jisung turned bashful, fumbling with the zipper on his sleeve.

“What? Too much?” he chuckled stiffly. “Changbin actually helped me, believe it or not. He told me you’d find me irresistible if I dressed up like this.”

You took a step back to admire his outfit. From his blond hair nicely styled, to the black ripped jeans he wore that showed off his slender legs, to the runstar hike Converse he wore often. Oh yeah, this man is hot shit, you thought, biting your lip. You looked back up to seeing him fidgeting with his black mock-turtleneck with a flushed face. You giggled, gingerly placing a warm hand on his face so he could face you. “You look good, Sung,” you smiled softly, as opposed to the not-so-innocent thoughts running through your mind. “Changbin’s right, by the way. You do look irresistible.”

You grabbed his hand and dragged him inside. “But to be honest, I find you irresistible no matter what,” you winked flirtatiously, causing him to blush even more and smile giddily. You walked inside the restaurant, instantly catching the faint scent of cinnamon. Ooh Sweet… You stood near the door, waiting for a host to seat you. After 3 minutes, someone finally came by.

“Hello! I apologize for the wait, we’re just slightly short staffed tonight.”

“Felix?” you and Jisung said. Felix’s eyes widened, just realizing it was you two.

“Y/n? Jisung?” he gasped. “Hey! I didn’t know you guys were going out already.”

“We’re, well. Not official yet,” you said. “We’re still in the ‘talking’ stage, right?”

Jisung nodded, humming in agreement. “But this is still a date though.”

“Lit,” Felix cheered, fistbumping Jisung. “I’ll show you to your table now.” Your host led the both of you to the corner of the restaurant. As you sat on the chair, Felix handed you some menus.

“So my bros, I’m Felix, everybody’s favorite little freckled Aussie, and I’ll be your server for tonight.” He bowed like he would during a curtain call of a play.

“Your theatre side is coming out, Felix. Is it intermission now?” Jisung joked. You snorted while Felix rolled his eyes.

“Just give me your drinks for tonight.”

Without looking from the menu, you answered, “Water.”

“Just get me any soda you have, man. Thanks!”

“Aight. I’ll be back in 2 minutes to get your orders.” Felix walked back to the host stand to seat another set of customers. You sat in silence, skimming through your options on the menu.

“Didn’t know Felix worked here,” Jisung announced.

You shrugged. “Me neither. I guess that’s why he’s been so busy.” Another wave of silence hit the both of you. You calmly looked at the food presented on the pamphlet. However, Jisung couldn’t take the quietness.

“Remember that photography assignment you’ve been working on?” he paused, waiting for your acknowledgment. You hummed, making eye contact with him. “How is it?”

You grunted, stretching your back. “Honestly. It’s a lot harder than I thought,” you sighed. “I’ve taken countless photos already but none of them seem to resonate within me. I feel so...”

“Trapped? Blocked?”

You stared at him, the mood now oddly serious. “Yeah...Nothing seems to feel right. It’s like I’m missing something.”

“Man, I feel you,” Jisung sighed. “Lately I’ve been feeling that too. You know how many songs I’ve trashed cause they didn’t sound the way I wanted it to?”

“The life of an artist, am I right?” you joked tiredly. He nodded, patting your hand empathetically. From the corner of your eyes, you could see Felix walking back to your table. “Oh shit, Felix is coming back. Hurry up and decide what to get!”

Pain. That was all the two of you could feel.

Your head was on the table, clutching your full stomach. You looked up to see Jisung blankly staring up at the ceiling. Is he still breathing?

All of a sudden, he looked down at you, a smile beginning to form from the corners of his mouth. “You too?”

You groaned, the pain in your stomach coming back. “Why did we order so much goddamn food?”

“Go big or go home,” he weakly cried out, raising his fists up. You laughed in amusement, regretting it immediately after when your stomach started to ache again.

“Holy crap, we’re gonna die in here.”

“‘Least we’re dying happy?”

“Is—shit...A-are guys okay?” Felix asked, worriedly. The sight of your empty eyes greatly concerned him.

“Just had too much food. We’re good,” Jisung answered, giving him a thumbs up.

“Barely,” you muttered as you slowly lifted your head up.

“I wanted to ask if you guys wanted dessert but nevermind…” he eyed you both. You and Jisung made eye contact together before looking back at your friend.

“What’s the special?” you both asked simultaneously.

“Nuh uh. I’m not about to be responsible for your deaths. Go home!”

You pouted. “Come on, Felix. Don’t you love us?”

“Yeah, bro! We can take it, let’s go!”

“If I go to jail for potential homicide, I swear to God,” he sighed. “Fine. The special for tonight is a chocolate cheesecake sprinkled with shreds of Belgian chocolate.”

Both your eyes lit up. You looked back at each other as if you were speaking telepathically. Chocolate cheesecake?

“I’ll get you both only one slice!” Felix scolded. “If you guys need to puke, the restroom is down the hall behind you to your left.” Your freckled friend walked away, into the kitchen, as he glanced back at your drained forms.

“Gosh, now we’re really gonna die in here,” you whispered.

Jisung snorted as he hung his head back over the chair, “At least I’m dying with you.” You stared at his limp figure for a while before feeling the urge to take a picture. Grabbing your bag from the chair, you dug for your phone, finding it, then pulled it out. You swiped to the camera screen and took some candid photos of Jisung. “Hey, hey! Do it again!”

You looked up to see him pouting. “I know I’m handsome but if you wanted to take some pictures, you gotta tell me!” he said, sitting up and fixing his hair. You rolled your eyes, scoffing in amusement.

“Fine. Smile!”

Jisung smiled, winking as he threw up a peace sign. You took two pictures before looking up. “Okay, do something else now.” Now he pointed his index finger and thumb out, placing it under his chin. He winked again, now smiling with his teeth. Then, switching to another pose; he puffed his cheeks, hands cupping his face with his lips pursed. “One more.”

He switched from a cute pose to morphing his face into an ugly one. You laughed, “Gross!” The two of you took a couple more fun pictures together.

“Wow, I’m so handsome. Look at that,” he said. You were about to reply when you saw Felix walking back up to your table.

“Okay, bad news guys. I for real didn’t plan this, but we ran out of dessert.”

“Aww, seriously?” Jisung pouted, looking up at Felix.

He hissed, rubbing Jisung’s back. “Yeah, sorry guys. I guess chocolate cheesecake is in high demand here.”

You watched Jisung frown deepen more, slightly feeling bad. “We can go out to buy some, if you want, Sung,” you offered, holding his hand. He turned his hand so that he was able to hold it properly.

Sighing, he said whilst chuckling to lighten up his mood, “Nah. This is probably a sign for us to stop eating.” He let go of your hand, much to your dismay, and faced Felix. “It’s alright, dude. Maybe next time!”

“I feel bad,” Felix muttered. “I’ll make it up to you guys next time, promise!”

“It’s okay, Lix, it’s not your fault,” you said. “We’ll just get the check now then.”

Felix reached into his apron. “Yeah, here it is,” he said, handing you the black bill holder before walking away. “Sorry, again!”

As You were reaching for your bag to grab your wallet, Jisung stopped you. “I’m paying,” he announced. You gave him a stank look before swatting his hand away.

“I can pay too, you know?”

He refuted. “No, I’m a gentleman. That means me paying for our meal is the gentlemanly thing to do.”

“Equal rights.”

“My treat.”

The both of you tightly gripped onto the bill, death staring at one another. Neither were going to back down anytime soon. You stared hard at his face as he did the same.

“Okay, fine. Let’s compromise. We split the bill. Deal?”

Jisung hummed in thought. He was about to disagree until you pitched in. “I’ll let you pay a little extra?”

“Deal.”

You placed your split payment inside the bill holder and handed it to Felix. “Thanks guys, come back again soon!”

“Later, dude!”

“Bye, Lix!”

You walked out the restaurant, the bell on the door ringing as you left. You were about to take the path to your house until Jisung stopped you. “Park,” he whispered. “Let’s go to the park.”

You blinked, slightly off guard. “Okay…”

The walk to the park wasn’t too far, literally right across from the restaurant. It was a peaceful night, the cool breeze brushed past your bodies as you walked. Silence filled the air between the both of you; nothing but the wind and the sound of dirt crunching under your shoes was heard. The mood was...romantic. There was no one but the two of you in the area.

Your bodies brushed past one another every once in a while—more specifically, your hands. You wanted to say something when Jisung beat you to it. He shyly slid his hand into yours, watching you from the corner of his eyes, and smiled when you entwined your fingers together.

“Tonight was fun,” you said softly. You leaned closer to his body to rest your head on his shoulder. Jisung tightened his grip on your hand.

“Me too,” he whispered. “I just wish I can spend more time with you.”

“You see me everyday though?”

“Yeah, but like, I mean just you and me, alone; no one else. I—” he inhaled sharply. “I’m greedy, aren’t I?”

You looked at him confused. “What do you mean?”

“I want to be with you all the fucking time, Y/n. It hurts when I’m without you. I feel alive when we’re together. It’s like, I feel like my world would stop if I don’t see you.” You were stunned. You could only listen quietly to his rant.

“God, I sound so possessive, that’s not what I was trying to aim for,” he panicked. “I don’t care if you’re with the guys, or anyone else, I know you're not the type to pull shit like that; I trust you. I just—fuck, why is this so hard?”

He stopped walking all of a sudden and pulled you away from the path, leading you 7 feet into the trees. In any normal circumstance, you would’ve been terrified. However, this was Jisung—and you knew it, somewhere deep down, that he would never do anything to hurt you. He let go of your hand and faced you. “Jisung?”

His heart pounded erratically, he didn’t know if he was on the verge of getting a heart attack. He felt overwhelmed. Having you standing right in front of him felt like a dream. He took a deep inhale in hopes of calming himself down. “I meant what I said this morning.”

“Wh-wha…?”

“You’re in my mind 24/7, Y/n. Everyday, I always think about you to the point I’m starting to think I’m going insane. Every text, every call, every time we talk, my heart feels like it might pop out. I can’t focus and I don’t know what to do about it!” He sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “Every song I’ve written was about you. Every time I look at my phone, I feel so disappointed when I don’t see a text from you.”

Jisung steps closer to you, nearly pinning you to the tree behind you. “You’re my muse, Y/n. I-I don’t really know exactly what my heart wants but all I know is that, you’re the person I want to spend my entire life with. I think…” he paused to take another deep breath. You could feel your own heart stopping, blood rushing up to your face. “I love you, Y/n!” Jisung declared loudly.

You didn’t know if the loud sound of a heart thumping was yours or his. You were stunned, happy, and scared; millions of emotions were racing within you. Not finding the proper words for yourself, you grabbed his face and kissed him. Jisung whimpered in shock, not really expecting that reaction from you. However, he quickly pulled himself together and kissed you back, wrapping his arms around your waist. You stayed like that until the burning in your chest overpowered the burn of your hearts. You both gasped heavily, taking back in the air you lost.

“You know,” your warm breath tickled his lips. “I never did take it up for the boner I gave you this morning.”

Jisung blushed, remember the embarrassment from earlier. “Yes you did? Our date is—”

“Then this is your gift.” You slowly kneeled in front of him, caressing his thighs as you went down. Jisung watched in shock.

“I—whoa. H-Here? I-in public? Y/n, that’s—”

“Do you not want this?” you looked up, wanting his confirmation. Jisung’s breath hitched, he never would’ve thought he’d be able to see you like this just yet. He bit his lip and nodded. You smiled, kissing his hip, before undoing his pants. You slowly pulled his jeans and underwear down to his knees, his cock springing up and slapping his stomach. You found yourself drooling, finally seeing his cock in person.

Jisung groaned, the cool air hitting his dick. “Fuck…” You licked your lips then took him whole, catching him off guard. He moaned, his hand now gripping onto your hair. “Holy shit, Y/n!”

You bobbed your head, hollowing your cheeks, as you pumped whatever your mouth couldn’t take in. The man above you let out heavy breaths, trying his best not to moan so loud. That was, in fact, proven to be difficult for your mouth was just heavenly. He rested his forehead onto the tree, looking down at you. Regret filled Jisung’s chest, greeted with the erotic sight of your cheeks puffed out, his cock sliding in and out of your pretty mouth. He moaned loudly into his arm. You moved your other hand to fondle his balls, causing Jisung to buck his hip into your mouth.

“Fuck baby,” he moaned. “So good—ah! F-Feels so good, shit!” He threw his head back, covering his mouth to mask his noises. His ragged breathing sounded absolutely delicious. You took his dick halfway out of your mouth, stopping right as you felt only his tip. You sucked harshly on it, tongue swirling around it until you decided to play with his slit.

Jisung roughly pulled on your hair, moaning so loud that it almost echoed through the trees. “Y-y/n…” he whimpered. You looked up to see tears brimming his eyes. You giggled, laughing even more when the vibrations from your vocal cords hit him all in the right places.

“Feels good, baby boy?” you briefly asked, immediately going back to his cock after. He nodded, pushing his hips closer to your face, almost making you choke.

“Y-yes, m-mommy.” A wave of arousal hit your core. You could feel your juices seeping right through your panties. The nickname had you moaning, much to Jisung’s pleasure as well. “Fuck! Mommy, more!”

You continued sucking and playing with the slit on his head as you pumped his shaft with one hand and groped his ball with the other. The higher Jisung’s voice raised, you knew the closer he was.

“Close, baby boy?” you giggled. He nodded, hips no fucking into your hand.

“Yes! Oh my God, I’m so fucking close, mommy!” he stuttered. “Please! Let me cum in your mouth!”

“Such a good boy, of course I’ll let you.” You attached your mouth back into his dick, moving your head once again to bring him closer to his high.

“Holy—FUCK!” Jisung moaned, his hand back onto his mouth to control his voice. His body shook as he released his creamy essence into your mouth. Your tongue swiped across his cock to lap up the rest of his juices. His and your unstable breathing was the only thing that could be heard now. Out of courtesy, you tucked him in back into his pants and stood up.

“Wh-What about you?” he asked breathlessly. You shook your head as you patted his head.

“Nevermind about me. You’ve made me happy enough,” you grinned. “When you’re okay again, we can go back home.”

“So...Is this the part where I’m supposed to kill you?” Jisung laughed breathlessly.

The dim lights of the city were nowhere near as bright as your faces. The two of you walked, hand-in-hand, as slowly as you could, in hopes of the night never ending. But alas, the both of you had a morning class the next day. Jisung walked you all the way to your apartment door, telling you it was only for ‘safety measures’. What a liar.

“Text me when you get home, okay?” You said as you unlocked your front door. Jisung grinned, pecking the hand he held.

“Of course. I’ll see you tomorrow? Make sure you get a good night’s sleep.”

“Yeah, yeah,” you playfully rolled your eyes. Letting go of his hand, you finally opened your door and stepped inside.

“Hey, Y/n?”

You turned around to face him. “Yeah?”

Jisung stood there with a smile wider than before. “I love you.”

You giggled cutely. “Me too,” you said as you walked back to him to kiss his lips. “Goodnight, baby boy.”

“Goodnight...mommy.” He laughed.

You rolled your eyes, “Hurry and go home already!” He turned around and started walking to the elevator, calling out one final ‘I love you!’ before he walked inside. It was painfully obvious that he was trying to act cool for you, but the bounce in his walk made him look like he was skipping gleefully. You laughed, walking back inside your apartment.

Inside the elevator, Jisung pulled out his phone to text someone.

Me: hey, minho?

when i finally get married to y/n...

please be our best man! :D

[PREVIOUS CHAPTER] 📱 [NEXT CHAPTER]

[xpeachesncream]

perfectly wrong | thirteen

summary: there were rules that had to be followed: no one could know about you two, there was no ‘getting to know each other,’ and there was absolutely no emotional attachment allowed. if this could be done, there should be no complications. but somehow, the rules always get bended.

pairing: reader x fuckboy!kth

genre: college au | fluff, angst, smut

words: 2.3k

chapter warnings: cussing, soft tae

notes: down to 2 chapters left! i will most likely do some drabbles every now and then for this, but not right away because i’ll be working on my new fic: acquainted. will let you know when this goes live, but pls check it out. it’s gonna be messy and filthy as hell, im sorry lmao

tags: @soulstaes​ @apollukee​ @imluckybitches​ @btsis7okay​ @ppangiiroo​ @gee-nee​ @enchantaeduniverse​ @miinoongi​ @thedarkwinterrose​ @levrantae​ @somewhereofftheglobe​ @jwlmnbt​ @symmetricaleyeliner​ @bluesharksandfish​ (pls msg me if you would like to be added to the taglist!)

> series masterlist <

Taehyung slouched on his couch, tv on whatever the hell channel it was on. He scrolled through his phone aimlessly, but it wasn't long before he huffed and threw his phone aside. He wasn't feeling himself, or anything for that matter, and was tired of being in this funk. He felt terrible about how everything went down and he couldn't really forgive himself for the shit he said to you. He didn't mean the things he said, but he was also the one who didn't know how to properly process feelings. He always acted on impulse and how he felt at that moment, rather than thinking about the situation rationally. Plus yeah, he had a temper. Shit didn't mix.

"Ayo." He hears Jimin's voice at the door, followed by three soft knocks.

"It's unlocked." Tae says. Jimin welcomes himself in and kicks his shoes aside. He smiles at him, holding something in his hands as he walks into the kitchen. "What's up?"

"Uh, found these at your door." He holds up the prints Tae bought from you. He sighs and shakes his head, almost dismissing it entirely.

"Keep it."

"Um, no? You bought these for a reason, so you should keep them."

"Not anymore." Taehyung lays his head back against the couch and shuts his eyes.

"You're so dramatic. I'm leaving these here."

"Whatever."

"What's wrong with you now, princess?"

"I'm just not in the mood."

"You haven't been in the mood.." Jimin sits on the other end of the couch. "And quite frankly, it's pretty annoying. You know what you did wrong, so why don't you just fix it?"

"It's not that easy."

"Says who? You?" Jimin scoffs. "Look, I know our track record isn't the best, but I know you genuinely care about Y/N. I know she means more to you than what you put out there, so why can't you just take it for what it is? Why do you have to make it so complicated?"

"Because I'm sure by now she hates me and wants nothing to do with me. It's exactly one of the things I'm afraid about the most. What if she gives up or realizes she doesn't want me the way I want her?"

"Do you think she's worth it?"

"I just-"

"Yes or no?" Taehyung looks at him as he leans over onto his knees.

"Yes, I do."

"Then none of that shit should matter. I'm positive she cares about you just as much as you do for her. If she's worth it, then you'd be willing to go through these ups and downs with her and do this ride with her."

"She's not going to want this after what I did, Jimin."

"You're full of excuses." Jimin shakes his head. "Then you do what you can to fix this and show her how you'll change, rather than just saying you'll do this and that."

"I don't know." Is all Taehyung can say. "I was pretty hurtful."

"You're also human. It's okay to make mistakes, but you should really work on processing your feelings better and communicating. Plus, your temper, dude. Tone that shit down."

"It's been so long since I've done this." Believe it or not, Taehyung was the complete opposite before. His last, serious relationship a couple of years ago made him flip the switch. He gave his ex everything, and was always willing to put his life down for her. He gave and gave, even if he felt like he couldn't anymore. He did all this just to get fucked over in the end, which is why he ultimately didn't believe relationships were worth the energy anymore.

"Y/N is not your ex. Stop comparing it to that. No experience will be the exact same."

"Ughhhh, I fucked this all up." Tae groaned, tilting his head back and covering it with his hat.

"I'm just saying, you could still try and fix this. Even in the end you two don't get together or whatever, you can at least say you tried. I'm tired of you moping around like you can't do shit to make it better. You know what she means to you."

"I'm not moping."

"Yes, you are! Look at you, looking like a sorry ass." Jimin threw his crumpled napkin at him. "Don't pass up on a good girl like that."

"Okay, I get it."

"No, I don't think you do." Tae looked at him. "Look, if this was any other girl, I probably wouldn't care much. But Y/N is genuinely different and I see how you both look at each other. It's really obvious how much you two ended up caring for each other."

"She is different. God, she's.." Tae sighs as he runs his hand through his hair. "She's beautiful and sweet, with just the right amount of mean. She's creative and her voice has always been so soothing. I want her around me all the time, even when she gets frustrating as hell." Jimin smiles.

"If you pass on her, she's mine." Jimin teased, knowing it would rub Taehyung the wrong way.

"Fuck you." Taehyung spat. "I should still beat your ass for the shit you pulled at the club."

"It was harmless." Jimin laughed. "So are you fixing this or what?"

"If I fix this, you need to stay 10 ft away from her." Jimin laughed out loud and held his stomach.

"Cry baby. I'm not gonna do anything." Jimin came and patted him on the back. "I'm sure everything will be just fine." And so, Taehyung gets himself up to go and fix this. He knew it wasn't going to be easy but he needed to right his wrongs.

Taehyung sat in his car and gathered himself together before he made his way up to the apartment. He gave off three knocks before he waited patiently for the door to swing open.

"I have to be honest, it's taking everything in me to stop myself from fucking you up right now." Jungkook sighed and stepped aside to let him in.

"That's fair."

"So, what's up? Why did you need to come here to talk to me?"

"I just wanted to apologize for how things went down at Jin's party."

"I appreciate it, but it still doesn't change the fact that you disrespected Y/N and talked down on her the way you did."

"I know, and I didn't mean any of it. I just wasn't thinking. If I'm being completely honest, I was pretty jealous of your relationship with her."

"What is this, high school?" Jungkook stopped himself from taking it any further because he could say a lot more to his face, but he wasn't going to since Taehyung made the effort to come here and apologize in person.

"Okay, I get it, it's childish."

"At least you're aware." Jungkook paused before shaking his head. "Look, not that it should even matter or anything, but all I knew growing up was Y/N and Jin hyung and vice versa. I didn't have any siblings or any cousins that could relate to me. I moved a lot before I finally settled with my family. I didn't get along with people easily, which is why when I met Y/N, we got really close and I stuck by her. We were similar, but different. It's always been that way, and quite frankly, it's not going to change." Taehyung nodded. "She doesn't have her family by her side, so me, hyung, Yoongi and Hoseok became that for her."

"I know, I'm sorry. I just kept thinking you two had it for each other like that and I couldn't understand why it was making me so upset."

"I love Y/N, I really do. But at the end of the day, she's her own person and she decides how to live her life. It's her life and I'm only in it." Jungkook shrugs. "I want nothing more than for Y/N to be happy with someone who can give her the world and cherish her for who she is. She has so much to offer and she brings life to everything around her."

"I-" Taehyung paused. "I really care about her. And I know this probably sounds stupid coming from me, but I want to do things differently with her."

"I just have to ask - are you even sure of your own feelings? You're not doing all of this cause you're lonely and have no one else to go to?"

"No, of course I'm sure of my feelings." Jungkook shrugged.

"You've been messing around with so many girls for some time now, though."

"Yeah and I also stopped doing that for awhile now."

"It's just hard to believe because I'd hate for her to have to go through it if you go back to your old ways."

"I won't."

"But that's easy for you to say, isn't it?" Kook shot him a look. All of a sudden, this conversation felt more like an interview but Jungkook had to do what he had to do. He knew what Taehyung was capable of, and he would hate for you to go through it again.

"Yeah it is, but she makes me want to be a better man." Jungkook sighed. He saw the look in Taehyung's face and he couldn't completely say it was all bullshit. He had never seen this kind of soft expression come from someone like Taehyung. "I haven't felt this way in a really long time, and it's scary for me. But she's worth it."

"I get that." Jungkook nods. "She cares about you a lot, you know? She may not say it but I saw how beat up she was over this entire thing."

"I want to fix this."

"I have to be honest, I'm a little wary. You really have to keep your word about doing better and not slipping up. She doesn't deserve it." Taehyung nods.

"I hear you." Taehyung pauses. "How is she?" Jungkook shrugs.

"Fine, except for the fact that she's sick right now." Taehyung's eyes widen.

"Is she alright?"

"Yeah. If you haven't figured it out already, Y/N isn't the type to back down." Taehyung chuckled.

"Yeah, I got that much."

"Hey," Jungkook tilted his head to look at him once more. "I really do respect the fact that you came here to talk to me in person. I know we don't know much about each other, but I know Y/N can see good in you." Taehyung nodded silently.

"Only trying to right my wrongs here. I don't want to slip up and lose her already."

"So, have you talked to hyung yet?" Taehyung looked at him and shook his head.

"No, but that's where I was headed after this." Kook nods silently. The two talk for a bit more, making sure they were on the right page, enough to put the past behind them and move on from the petty, unnecessary drama that had went down. When Taehyung had felt satisfied tackling one of the biggest hurdles, he made his way over to the cafe to tackle the last one. Not gonna lie, Taehyung was scared for this encounter because he knew Jin would lay his life down for you. Luckily for him, Jin was a wise man and never held grudges. Of course he didn't appreciate how Taehyung handled himself and this whole thing, but it wasn't entirely his fault and Jin always thought holding onto negativity was a waste of energy.

Jin happily greeted him, like his usual self, and brought him to the back so they could talk. Taehyung was sweating bullets, but he knew if he wanted to be in your life, he'd have to make it right with Jin. For Aiko, for the things he said and the things he's done to hurt you, everything. And so he sympathetically apologizes as he sits in front of Jin. Apologizes for the way things went down at the party, for Aiko, for having hurt anyone in this situation. Jin gave off a small, toothless smile and told Taehyung how he appreciated him for coming by. Quite frankly, he wanted to kill him as soon as you had told him about everything that had gone done between the both of you, including finding out about Aiko. Although the whole thing with Aiko was unfortunate, he couldn't really be mad because she was never his to begin with. The only thing he was really worried about was you, his baby cousin. Baby sister. Taehyung confessed that he had been feeling pretty lost because he believed you wouldn't want anything to do with him after that night. Jin reassures him and does a damn good job of it, telling him that you would never completely shut someone out, especially if you cared about them. Jin could tell how much you ended up caring for the guy and he wasn't going to make you change your mind about it because you were grown, and you could make your own decisions. He would only be there to support you and reassure you if times got tough. He didn't know Taehyung enough to immediately label him as a bad guy and right now, he was only showing he had some good in him.

They continued to talk for a bit [while Jin still had the time, at least], with Jin trying his best to coach him about how to best proceed with this situation. Of course, it was entirely up to Taehyung how he wanted to do this, but Jin could afford to sprinkle in a little bit of help.

"You're really sure about this, right? I don't want her to get hurt again. Y/N deserves all the best, and if a man were to ever come into her life, I'd want him to take good care of her and spoil her without her having to ask for it. I'd want him to be sure of her and to never make her question her worth." Taehyung nodded.

"I hear you, and I'm sure. It's scary, but I want to do this with her."

[theworldofotps]

Silent Feelings (Part 2 of S.S)

Pairing: Dexter Lumis x Reader Word Count: 1,404 Description: Dexter wants to do more than just be y/n’s friend. But how can he do that when neither are sure how the other feels?

Part 1

Part 3

Warning: Povs switch between first and third person throughout the fic. They are separated by ~~~ so hopefully you don’t get confused.

Also I wrote the little piece Dexter gives the reader a while ago so please be gentle.

Thank you @new-zealand-chic for beta reading for me! ________ Tag list: @hungmanhorsecarriage @writtingrose @sjwrites22 @sassymox @the-beastslayers-queen @thewrestlingwarehouse @new-zealand-chic @mrsambroserollinsacklesmgk @xladyxfatex @biforrollynch @irish-newzealand-idian-dutch @demonqueen29 @itsicantbelievethis666 @lilred91 @xbreezymeadowsx  @rebellious-desires @youcantreignonmyparade @melblacc @letsgivethisonemoreshot @omg-im-such-a-masochist 

If you wanna be added to the list lemme know. _______ “So as your best friend besides old Finn here I need to ask you..has Dexter kissed you yet?”

Shotzi smiles as she leans across the table waiting patiently for me to give her what I’m assuming she’s hoping is juicy details.

“Listen Shots, we’ve only gone out a few times so no he hasn’t kissed me yet, he hasn’t even attempted to but I don’t mind. Sure I’d like to kiss him but I want him to be comfortable and I don’t know if he even wants to kiss me.”

I trail off looking between them when they stare at me sipping my water I offer an awkward smile. 

“Will you two stop staring at me please because it’s really making me uncomfortable.”

“Oh come on lass of course the lad wants to kiss you but maybe he's worried you don't want that. Sometimes it's hard telling what a person wants."

"He's right, I mean he's always getting you your favorite coffee. Without you even asking and when you go to pay it back he won't let you. It's been what a few months give or take, since you two went on your first outing together. And you've had countless ones since then. Not to mention you're always talking and he hasn't even spoken to you, and."

"Okay, Shotzi I think she gets it lass, sit down and take a breather."

Finn pats her shoulder before looking back at me. 

"I really think he'd like to kiss you, he watches your mouth a lot and Dexter just really looks at you like a man that wants to grab up his girl and lay one on her."

"I hear what you all are saying and it makes sense I'm just scared you guys could be reading it wrong. If it happens it does and if it doesn't it's fine, now if you two will excuse me. I'm gonna pack up for the day and head home. I wanna get a nice soak in the tub before it gets too late."

"Alright sorry it's just really exciting to see you so happy, Finn said for all the years he's known you. This is the happiest you've been in a while."

"Just giving out all of my secrets Devitt?"

"Hey it was just casual conversation, now go off and enjoy your night." 

“Thanks see you two later.”

Hugging them both I sling my bag over my shoulder and leave the table making my way down the hall I pull my phone out. I wasn’t sure if this would do any good but I decided why not give it a shot.

Y/n💮: Do you wanna come over and hang out for a bit?

Pressing send I make it out to my car setting my duffel back on the seat next to me, rolling the windows down I turn the radio up pulling out of the lot. Singing along to the music I dance in my seat thinking about what Shotzi and Finn had said. Dexter had been doing little things here and there for me, I was getting a decent collection of his painting. Not to mention he had started leaving little poems in my locker room every Wednesday. Maybe they were right and tonight I was planning on finding out.

Pulling into my garage I go into the house I was renting from my cousin kicking my shoes off I check my phone.

D. Lumis👀: Yeah sure I’ll be there in half an hour need me to bring anything?

Y/n💮: Any snacks if you’d like we can order dinner here?

D. Lumis👀: Sounds good see you then

Y/n💮: Be safe 

Running upstairs I start a bath I could spend twenty minutes soaking and showering than the last ten dressing. Searching for a comfortable outfit I take it into the bathroom finishing up getting everything set and I strip stepping in. This water felt amazing on my soar muscles. ~~~~~ Dexter dresses in a pair of slacks and a black tank top, he was excited to spend some time with you. Even if he didn’t particularly look so. Grabbing his phone and keys Dexter leaves his room going downstairs. Grabbing the small box he had for you Dexter locks up his house going to his car. He’d stop at the store closest to your house and grab the snacks before continuing to your place. Going inside he grabs a few of your favorite snacks and drinks then going to the front he pays. Now it was time to head over and meet you. ~~~~~ Wrapping the towel around my body I leave the bathroom and make my way into the bedroom. Grabbing my undergarments I go to put them on and stop hearing a knock on my front door. Damn must have been in the bathroom a little longer than planned. Rushing from the room I make my way downstairs and look out the peep hole.

“Dexter!”

Smiling I open the door and greet him as I step back to let him in. Watching as his eyes flicked down my frame and then back up. I had completely forgotten that I was only in a towel. Embarrassment hits me full force as I rub the back of my neck.“

Sorry about that I was in the shower and ended up being in there longer then I meant to be.”

Offering a smile as he stepped inside Dexter holds up two bags in his hands. 

“You got the stuff awesome, go ahead and sit in the living room. Please make yourself comfortable. I'm just uh gonna go get dressed.”

Quickly turning away I go back up to my room closing the door. Leaning against it I groan and sigh then continue with getting dressed. After I was finally ready I left my room going back downstairs. 

“Okay I’m back ready to order some food and watch a movie?”

~~~~~ Dexter nods his head showing you he had the snacks and drinks all set up. He scoots over so you could sit next to him and he pulls out a smaller bag. Setting it in your hands, Dexter watches you nervously.

“What’s this?”

You asked him and he motions for you to open it. Lifting the paper he watches as you pull out the small framed poem he gave you a few weeks ago. Occasionally he’d write a poem and give it to you, this was one of your favorites.

“Wildflowers, by Dexter Lumis.”

You read out loud as you look at the frame. 

‘If I had to use one single word to describe you it would be, wildflower. Your personality is brightly colored with love and patience.  The strong will you hold is a trait I think I admire the most.

Despite all the things thrown at you darling you continue to grow.  The space you take up in this world makes life beautiful. Be that you are soft at times when vulnerable, but always firm when need be.  All your different traits add up to the beautiful free spirit you are.’

“Awee Dexter that's so sweet thank you.”

Giving you a small smile and nod Dexter offers you the remote to pick a movie for you to watch. Selecting one of your favorites you order dinner then settle back resting your head on his shoulder. 

As the evening continued on Dexter could see you were getting tired, even though you kept denying it. Halfway through the fourth movie Dexter looked at the time seeing it was nearly midnight. You really should be getting to bed and he needed to get home. 

Gently nudging you Dexter smiles as you cuddle closer to his side. Sighing he grabs the blanket off the back of your couch laying down so you were resting on his chest and covers you both. Rubbing your back lightly when you start to stir Dexter turns the tv off.

Once the room is plunged in darkness he closes his eyes, if he was honest he was loving every minute of holding you.

“Dexter.”

You mumbled causing him to open his eyes and rub your back a little softer.

“Hmm?”

“Thank you for staying I really like having you over….I really like you.”

Yawning you rub your eyes drifting back off to sleep and just before you’re completely gone you hear what you think is a faint whisper.

“I really like you too y/n.”

[13uswntimagines]

Put a Little Love on Me (Emily Sonnett x Reader)

Request: Emily x Reader Based on Put a Little Love on Me by Nial Horan

Author’s Note: So Im gonna be honest here, I actually had an entirely different, much angstier plan for this, but i just couldn’t seem to get this image out of my head. I hope you enjoy and that I hit the request enough! Hit me up with questions or comments, it gives me life to know what y’all think. 

The word you would use for you and Emily was inevitable. Like two magnets always being drawn to each other for better or for worse. Your careers weren’t really conducive. You were always on the road with your music and she was always on the road with her soccer, and where those roads crossed was few and far between. 

Distance was hard, and the main cause of issues in your relationship. That and the media was hell-bent on having you date every human being you interacted with. The fight had been stupid, she knew that. It was a bad mixture of Jealousy, exhaustion, and longing that had led to the two of you being at the same award show and not speaking to each other. 

Emily sighed wiggling in her uncomfortable seat, waiting impatiently for the stupid commercial break to be over. The quicker they got through this, the quicker she could talk this out with you. You were only sitting 3 rows ahead of the team, but so far you hadn’t spared a glance in their directions, not even when you had left to go get ready for your performance. She fucked up, she knew that, but it still hurt to have you blatantly ignore them. 

“What happened between you and hot stuff?” Lindsey asked, bumping Emily’s shoulder. You were avoiding her as much as you were avoiding Sonnett, and she needed to know why. She was your best friend too. 

Emily looked down, picking at a loose thread on her red dress. 

****

“It’s not like I have a choice Emily,” You growled back, your hand ripping frustratedly through your hair as you paced the living room. 

You were only in town for the next 36 hours and you wanted to celebrate with your girlfriend, but she was too hung up on a stupid music video. A stupid music video that was currently number 1 in the world. 

“But you do. You didn’t have to do a sexy dance with your duet partner,” She growled back from her place on the couch. You were the big name in the diet with Camila. You were the one with all the control. Maybe Camila wasn’t your type, but that hadn’t made watching her dance all over you any easier. 

“Emily…” You huffed, slumming back onto the couch and scrubbing your eyes. It was complicated. Yes, you had some control, but the pressure had been insane. Camila was in a committed relationship with her bandmate, and you were in love. You had given in because you didn’t want another fight with your managers. And you didn’t want them to take away the already limited time you had with your girl. 

“Don’t Emily me! The entire world thinks you’re fucking her and you decided to let her grope you in your fucking music video,” She growled back dangerously, allowing her frustration with the media and her jealousy take complete control. Hiding how much it hurt to watch you do some of those moves with Camila. To watch her whisper senorita in your ear. Emily knew she didn’t call you that, so who was?

“I’m not cheating on you Emily, I fucking love you, and I just wanna enjoy the time I have with you,” You sighed, just so tired of all of this fighting. Was one quiet night with your girl too much to ask for? 

“What, just so you can go running back to her?” Emily spat, and you winced. 

“We’re on tour babe, she’s my opening act, nothing more, and you okayed it, so I don’t know what your problem is. I love you,” You explained slowly, emphasizing the word you. You only wanted her, why wouldn’t she believe you? 

There was a pregnant pause between the two of you. Your face stayed buried in your hands, and Emily’s chest heaved. If you couldn’t understand why she was upset that another woman was all over you, then maybe you didn’t care about her as much as she cared about you. 

“Well, if you can’t grasp it, then why don’t you just go?” She said, her voice barely above a whisper, and your wide eyes snapped to her. It felt like your whole world was caving in on you, if you lost Emily, you didn’t know what you’d do. 

You opened and closed your mouth several times, finally only a feeble “What, Em-,” squeaked past your lips. Her face remained impassive, as though shattering you was easy. 

“Get. Out.” She gritted out, pointing towards the door. 

You stood, pausing only to stare at her for a few more seconds. The silence between you was heavy, like mud seeping into your bones. 

“I love you, Emily, only you,” You sighed, hanging your head in defeat, and walking out the door. You spared her a glance, wondering how this night had turned out like this. You had been high on the excitement of finally getting to see her, and now you were crashing back to reality. You waited for her to respond, shaking your head when she wouldn’t even look in your direction. 

****

“We had a fight,” Emily huffed, pulling around the loose strand. The fight was stupid, but she never thought you’d actually leave. That you’d walk away instead of staying and fighting for her. She had sulked all through the first days of camp until the first letter appeared. 

“Hmm, is that why you’ve been getting so many letters?” Lindsey smirked, and Emily rolled her eyes. 

“No, that was because I wouldn’t pick up my phone,” She snorted, remembering the words that had accompanied the first page. You had said that maybe you could be like Noah from the notebook. That if she wouldn’t answer your calls, then you’d write her a letter every day. And then maybe she’d be like Allie and come back to you. 

You had kept your word. Every day between then and now you had written her a letter, and sometimes she wrote you back. You made up and “talked” out your issues, and now it was time for the reunion. At least she hoped that's what you were thinking. 

“Gotta admit, she’s got game,” Kelley snorted from beside Lindsey. You were a true romantic at heart and that never ceased to amaze them. You were essentially apologizing with Emily’s favorite movie.  

“And she’s totally in love with you Emily,” Alex added over her girlfriend's shoulder. No one sent almost 100 letters unless they were super in love. 

Emily nodded, she knew you loved her and only her. It also helped that Camila was cuddled up with her own girlfriend 2 rows in front of them. It was hard to be jealous when you saw the person of your ire being utterly lovestruck with someone else (and she was pretty sure that the only person Camila wanted to call her Senorita was Lauren). 

****

“You ready kid?” Your manager asked, straightening the collar of your suit. 

You nodded hesitantly “I just hope she dances with me,” you mumbled. If she stayed in her seat, you didn’t know what you were going to do. You had planned this, and the only person who didn’t know was the main component. 

You sighed. You wondered about her every day, where she was, how she was doing. You knew you loved her, and you were about to show her. 

“She’d be an idiot not to,” You manager smiled, patting your back, and you gulped. You hoped so. You were pretty sure she would, she had forgiven you. She had even replied with I love yours, so hopefully, this all worked out. You had so much love for her that you could only pray it would be enough. 

*****

You looked breathtaking on stage, standing in that navel blue suite. The performance was simple, just you and a mic in the spotlight, a piano playing in the background. It was odd for you not playing your accompaniment, but you did everything for a reason. Emily bit her lip, unable to take her eyes off of you. The spotlight mixed with that color made you look… so suave. Almost like the female James Bond. 

“She looks sad,” Lindsey mumbled, patting Emily’s leg lightly. And Emily leaned forward, looking closer. She took in the furrow of your eyebrows, how you bright Y/E/C orbs were slightly dulled. 

“The song is sad,” She huffed. She knew how much this song meant to you. She had asked about it frequently in your letters, and you had been honest about how much pain you were in. 

“Not the ending,” Lindsey smirked, and Emily nodded. The two of you had made up and the end of that song reflected that.

“I wonder what her plan is, she never does anything this simple,” Emily murmured, smoothing out a crinkle in her red dress. If you weren’t playing the piano, then you had to have something big up your sleeve. 

You Unhooked the mic and began wandering down the steps. 

“She’s coming this way,” Lindsey said shocked, and suddenly, Emily’s hand was balling the material of her dress in her fist, and your eyes met for the first time that night. All of your attention was on her. 

You walk slowly down the aisle, the bridge ringing through the room. The audience stared at you in awe, but you only had eyes for one woman. A woman who you had pulled several strings to have sitting on the end of the row. 

You stopped in front of her, just as you got to the acoustic section right before the final chorus. Reaching out a hand and sending her a pleading look when she didn’t immediately take it, praying to God that this wouldn’t backfire on you. She stared at you wide-eyed, frozen at the suggestion. 

You bit your lip as the tension in the room seemed to grow. The eyes on you waiting with bated breath to see what Emily would do. Lindsey nudged her, snapping Emily out of her daze. 

You smiled encouraging down at her, and just as the final chorus began, she delicately placed her hand in yours. You pulled her up into you, her arms wrapping around your neck as yours landed on her waists, and the two of you began to sway in a slow dance. 

“When the lights come up we’re the only ones dancing, I look around and you’re standing there asking, you’re the only one I need,” You sing quietly conscious of your proximity, staring into Emily’s bright blue with so much love as the lights flash on, and you’re the only two dancing. 

She leans in close to you, just as you get the final line, her breath fanning across your lips, your foreheads touching. 

Her lips press against your own, stealing the final note. The crowd erupted in thunderous applause and wolf whistles, but you don’t hear any of it. All of your attention focused solely on the woman in your arms. The woman that you loved so dearly and were so terrified of losing. 

“I love you, only you Emily,” You breathed out, squeezing her side lightly. 

“I know. I love you too,” She smiled, pecking your lips again. It felt so nice to hold her close, to have her right here in front of you. You reluctantly pulled away as the announcers called your name. You shot over your shoulder, before reconnecting your forehead with Emily’s. You just wanted to live in this moment forever. 

“go, I’ll see you later,” Emily whispered, nudging your nose with her own and pushing you lightly in the direction of your impatiently waiting team. 

You laughed, grabbing her hand and pulling her with you. “You’re coming with me babe, you’re the only one I need,” You shoot her a goofy thing, kissing her knuckles. 

“Put a little love on me,” She hummed back, wrapping her arms around you and kissing just behind your ear. 

You loved her and she loved you and that was all that mattered. You were magnets, always trying to find each other, always pushing and pulling, always connected. You would talk about the details later, for now, you would just bask in being together again. 

[zmayadw]

Hello to all :)

Its time to continue the story. I’ll post 2 parts today, since next one is a bit short, but the second one a bit longer, so bear with me :D

Anyway, wish you all a nice evening :)

CALL OF THE RAVEN

PART 5

The sun was shyly peeking through clouds when i woke up. I felt a bit woozy,  the events of last night coming back to me. My stomach ached, tears forming in my eyes as the image of Jake leaving flashed before my eyes. „Good morning, hun.“ It was Doris, worry still written all over her face. „You gave me quite a scare last night. Are you allright,hun?“ she asked. „Yeha, I will be, thanks Doris.“ I said, whiping those tears away. „Oh, dont you worry, hun, he'll come arround.“ She smiled, and winked at me. „Sorry?“ i said. „The guy that was here yeserday. A girl can only cry like that because of something like it.“ She said, gazing at the wall, like remembering something similar herself. I gave her the best forced smile i could make „I hope your right, Doris, i really do.“ „Oh, trust me, hun. I can bet you he will.“ She smiled at me so warmly, gave me my breakfast, and left me to to it. I didnt really have much of an apetite, but i forced myself to eat, and i drank some tea. I took my phone, texting Jessy, asking if she might come arround today. She replied quickly that she's actualy on her way here already, and i was glad for it. I could really use her company right now.  It wasnt long till her cheerful voice echoed through my room „Hey, hey, miss Reckless“ she teased. „I bring coffee and icecream.“ She waved the bags at me, but imediatly stoped seeing my face. „Oh, Maya, what happened?“ she asked, her face taking on the sadden look. That sadness came back to me, and i started crying. Jessy left the bags on the chair, quickly sitting next to me, hugging me tightly. „Let me guess“ she sarted „He texted you, didnt he?“ I shook my head, wich made her ask again. „He called?“ Again, i shook my head. She pulled away from me, a bit of curiosity on her face. „He was here?!?“ I finaly nooded. „Nice.“ She said, and i looked at her a bit confused, saying through tears „Nice? Jessy, i would not cry like a little bitch if it was nice!“. „Oh, shush, you silly, and listen!“ she stared, taking a hankerchief from the stand, handing it to me. „You said it yourself, its gonna be a tough conversation. And lets be honest, he has EVERY right to be pissed at you.“ I growled at her, but she shushed me and continued. „Wait, wait, im not done. He probably heard all the information from Lily about what happened, and im sure he 'interrogated' her for every little detail. She definatly didnt sugarcoat any of it, so he got the good picture.“ That word 'interogated' got me smiling a bit, i could totaly picture Jake naging Lily to tell him every little bit of events that happened. „Ok, you following me. So tell me this then: if he already knew all that happened, and if he knew how you wer doing, would he come here himself, if he was that much pissed? Or if he doesnt care anymore?“ she asked, looking at me, with a cheerfull grin on her face. She got me some hope back with her words, but it quckly got replaced with despair again. „But you should have seen him, Jessy. He looked so dissapointed and betrayed by me...like i drowned that little spark of hope he had in him. I dont think he will ever want to see me again, let alone talk to me.“ She looked at me smiling. „Dont worry, Maya, im sure you're wrong about it, if i can judge by other men.“ „You and Doris both.“ I said, mumling it more to myself then to her. Jessy didnt seem to notice. „Give him some time to cool off. Maybe then you two can talk again about everything..without all this drama.“ She nudged at me, getting up and grabing one of the bags from the chair. „This needs some serious icecream overdose, like right now! „Thanks, Jessy..for being here for me.“ I said, as she handed me the spoon. „No need to thank me. You know i'm here for you, Maya, for anything.“ „I know, Jessy, right back at ya'.“ We ate some icecream in silence for a while, and i could see on Jessy's face that there was something that occupied her toughts. I poked her leg with my finger, wich made her look at me. „Whats on your mind, Jessy? I can see something is bothering you.“ i asked. She hesitated for a moment, before saying „Are you really sure you want to know?“  That got me a bit confused „Ofcourse, Jessy, you know you can talk to me about anything.“  She looked through the window, wich was now full of rain drops, and her face took on the same gloomy features as the weather outside. „They burried him yesterday.“ She said finaly, and i didnt have to ask who she refered to. „Oh..i see.“ I didnt know what more to say. „Thats why i didnt come yesterday.“ She continued. „I dont know why, but i wanted to go. I guess i wanted to be sure it was really over, you know?“ she said, her eyes getting a bit sad. „I cant belive what i'm about to say, but it was sad. Seing his dad like that, alone.“ She turned her gaze back to the window. „Jessy..its all right. Its understandable you have mixed feelings about it.“ I said. „Is it?“ she asked, turning back to me. „Isnt it crazy to care for someone, even tho he caused us so much pain, and almost ruined our lives? After all thats happened?“ now her eyes wer full of tears. I got out of bed, crouching next to her, taking her by the hand „Your not crazy, Jessy. You wer friends for so long, all of you. You all shared so much together, I saw how close all of you wer. And for that bond to be cut so suddenly and cruely..Especialy for you, since you two wer the closest...No, Jessy, its not crazy you feel this way.“ I hoped my words would make some sense to her. I could see it really bothered her so much. „Maybe you shoul talk to others about it.“ I advised. She looked at me, a bit sceptical, but i continued. „Hey, dont dismiss it so fast. And beside, eventually you guys will have to discuss those events.“  „Later sounds better to me.“ She replied, some of her cheerfullness coming back. „Whenever you guys feel up to it.“ I told her, getting up and sitting back on the bed. She got up, went to the bathroom, and when she came back she looked at me „We have to stop crying everytime im here, its almost all we ever do.!“ She grinned, and i returned her a grin of my own. „Well, lets make a pact then, shall we? From now on no more crying! Agreed?“ i asked, extendig my hand towards her, wich she took instantly, laughing „Agreed!“ She stayed with me for a while more. At some point a doctor came in informing me that if all would look ok, next week i could get discharged from hospital. That made Jessy even more happier, since she couldnt wait for me to get out of here. „Oh, dont get so excited just jet“ i grined at her, and she looked puzzled at me. „Dan cant wait it also, he said you forbid him from drinking, but when i get out you wont be able to say no to him!“ „Ohh, that hooligan! He will hear from me about that!“ she said fierce, but couldnt hide the smile. „Go easy on him, i think we all deserve one 'crazy night out', considering all.“ I told her,and she agreed, but added „Just not too crazy, please! Dan thinks he can sing when drunk, and unfortunatly we can barely keep him away from the karaoke machine at Aurora.“ „Ahh, you shouldn't have told me this, now you have to let Dan loose, i have to hear that amazing vocie of his!“ We both laughed at it. Doris entered the room „Oh, its nice to see you laugh, hun, thats the best medicine there is.“ She siad, winking at me. „Sure is, Doris.“ I said, winking back.

[kareofbears]

persona 5 strikers thoughts and feelings

This is going to be a long post. Like, the type of post you’d only really have time to read when you’re trying to sleep but you’re not ready to be unconscious yet so you’re just looking for something to do to spend your time with minimal effort. 

So in 2018, a masterpiece was born into the world: Into the Spider-verse was released and it was amazing—it’s honestly the best spiderman movie we have without a doubt, and it’ll be very far into the future before Spider-verse is beaten as the best spiderman movie. Them’s the facts. Then in 2019, Spider-man: Far From Home was dropped. It’s a great movie! Great characters, great continuation of who these characters are and works fantastic as a continuation of a story. It’s really hard trying to take the torch of a previous movie (or in Marvel’s case, juggling twenty something movies) and come up with a new movie that both works on its own, as well as being the next step in this series of films. Thus, with that idea in mind, I think it’s kind of unfair to judge into the spiderverse and far from home, because these are two movies with two completely different objectives in mind. 

Okay, so this is still a persona 5 strikers post, I promise, but the idea is the same: Persona 5 could basically do whatever it wanted—new story, new characters, new everything, and it’s just plain old awesome. However, Persona 5 strikers did not have that sort of freedom. It was bound to the original game, and it had its own rules and stuff it had to keep intact, characters they had to work with, and on top of that, it had to justify its existence as a sequel (lets pretend money doesnt exist lmfao). 

SO, the big question is: did it do that? Did it justify its existence? 

And my answer: holy fuck did it ever do that

I came into this game knowing the extreme bare minimum. I knew there was someone named Sophia, and i knew there was roadtrip, and i knew there were Personas. That’s my knowledge of it before i played it on the Switch.  I should also clarify like, early on, that i was not expecting anything from this game. At all. I was the world’s biggest cynic of this game—if you scroll down my p5s tag far enough, youll just see me complaining about a game that hasn’t even come out yet. I was fully expecting to have this be a Waifu show, and any male character that isn’t Akira to just be shoved aside like some kind of nerd in a high school hallway, and i have never been more pleased to be wrong. In fact, i actually owe it an apology, because of how fucking rude i was for no reason!!! Because this game deserves everything to be honest. 

Persona 5 strikers is, frankly, insane. Insane in the sense that it got to pull shit off that just would never have existed in the original game, because the original game is scared. It had to be as impressive as possible and garner as much attention as possible. Strikers does not have that problem—every single person who bought that game does not need to be convinced that persona 5 is a good game. They already played it. That means Atlus can just fuck around and have a good time, and man did they have a good time. There’s still scenes that still shock me if i think about it too hard, because i’m used to atlus having to follow this sort of rule set when it comes to persona 5 (or any of the main games im assuming, but i havent played them.) And on top of that, there’s still shit that’s Atlus Trademarked Branded in a good way. The style of story of story telling, and revealing the mystery that is so integral to what p5 is, is still there. 

So, to make this even a little bit comprehensible, i will make a list! 

First of all, What is this game?

In short, this game is an OVA of an anime. It’s bonus side content that has one thing in mind: to showcase these lovable characters more by putting them in fun situations. That’s it, and it is just phenomenal. That was the main point of, i’d say, like forty hours of the game. It’s just fun times with fun characters. 

But to get deeper of what i think is happening, or what they were thinking during the development, is that this is a second opportunity. Persona 5 (as we all know) had a lot of problems, and we were not quiet about those problems. We yelled it all out, made posts, made complaints on every social media platform ever. And Atlus heard all of them, and Strikers is a way to mitigate those mistakes. Aside from being a fun OVA, Strikers also works to be a deeper exploration of these characters—more specifically, the characters that did not receive much in the original game. Creating this sequel is having the ability to redo what they felt (or to be more specific, we felt) in the original game while adding new ones. I will get to that in a second.  

The format of the game 

Absolutely brilliant to throw them on a road trip. P5V already forced us to experience Shibuya for 200+ hours, and im so glad that they didn’t do that again. Going from town to town, making us experience these new places alongside our favorite characters is so good, and it just makes sense. It’s fun, it’s lighthearted, and it’s actually shockingly good. But one thing i do want to talk about early on is the way the story unfolds and the villains that they use, and what they do with it because it’s very interesting. 

So as we explore japan and stuff, we encounter jails, and with those jails comes an antagonist. This antagonist works to be a parallel to one of our characters. That character will find it in their hearts to feel bad for the antagonist, because the antagonist could have been them had the original game not happen. At first I thought all of the thieves were gonna get an antagonist, and i was really hyped for the ryuji one. And then came to hour forty of the game where i realized “yeah that’s not gonna happen. There’s just not enough time.” And i was right, and the game ended. But i am not salty at all, honestly, because the people who got a direct antagonist were: Ann, Yusuke, and Haru. (we wont count zen and sophie). 

Is there a trend??? Yes. these are all characters in the original game that have received the worst treatment by atlus. The three of them are basically cast aside the minute they finished their original arc, and its horrible! BUT that’s why this is the path that atlus chose for them—to give them more depth, and screentime, and a way to show their inner self. That isn’t to say that the ones who aren’t those three (makoto, futaba, mona, akira, ryuji) didn’t get anything. Futaba still has her thing at the end with ichinose, and she was very prevalent and animated during the rest of the game. Mona and Akira have to be a focal points, that’s just the nature of the game. The other two though, I will talk about in depth in a second.  

Makoto

Y’all i poke fun at shumako fans sometimes cause its kind of easy and fun, but i honestly love makoto. In my very first playthrough of p5 (my first ever jrpg game, first persona game, i had no idea what i was doing), i had only maxed out two characters: ryuji and makoto. And i know she had a lot of screentime and love in the original game which is great, but i truly felt like she was dissed in this game. Her only roles were

A driver

Someone to tell them “we don’t have a choice. Let’s keep going and see where this takes us.” (seriously, if you replay this game, you will see how much she does this)

Idk, i just wish she had more to do, especially compared to how much love they gave the other characters. 

But let’s talk about some of the new characters! 

Zenkichi

Damn you atlus. Damn you and your insistence at bringing in cop characters. I was fully on board with hating zenkichi, i was fucking ready for it. I was convinced that there was nothing they could do convince to like zenkichi. I was immune to their copaganda. 

And then i ended up loving him, which makes me sad a little bit. I didn’t realize how desperate i was to have an adult who has a persona. Someone who wants the world to change just as much as they do, while still having that aspect of them that makes them adult. Like??? As someone who is technically an adult, its a breath of fresh air. An adult. Who fights. For justice. Using a persona. And god i love akane so much, and her obsession with the thieves (that scene is probably in my top ten fave scenes of the game). Also what i loved about zenkichi is that he fucking hates the cops!! He hates the system of the cops!! And thats why i actually really started to love him!! Because i thought it was atlus saying that the systematic problem of the police cannot be solved by one person, and zenkichi threw away his badge. I actually cried at that part!! 

But then he became a cop again, and i was just :/ but as a character, i really love him to bits and would love to do a study on him, or at least use him as an outside pov. But! i absolutely love his persona, since im a les miserables fan hehe

Sophia 

she’s probably my favorite new aspect of the game. I was ready to not like her—again, i just suck like that, lmfao—and when i saw her, i was scared that she was just another waifu. I mean, she was very cute after all. But then as the game went on, i thought she was a little too cute. And even further into the game, i finally slapped myself in the face and realized oh my god shes not a waifu. Shes a sister. 

That blew my mind, im ngl to you. A female character that isn’t supposed to be romanced? By jove, what a miracle! 

And she…is an amazing character. Im sorry, i just love her so much. I love her so much that she  probably ranks as my fifth or sixth favorite character which is surprising even to me. Everything about her is delightful and invigorating. She’s funny??? Her comedic timing is amazing, and she has such chemistry with the rest of the team. She’s actually useful to the plot, and while her character design is a little too on the nose for me in terms of cuteness (i mean, good god she’s wearing oversized sweater to show how cute and tiny she is, and her hair has literal hearts in it), she is absolutely lovable. 

But what i actually really wanna gush about for a second is sophia at the last stage of the game. You get the idea, i dont really like to get excited over things, so at this point i figured that there was nothing this game could do to shock me. 

And then sophia had a persona awakening. 

Like. holy fuck did i yell. I didnt realize what was happening until the music had already kicked in. and its just so fucking smart!!! Sophia??? The ai?? With no heart?? gOT A PERSONA???? AWAKENING??? BECAUSE SHE LEARNED WHAT THE HEART IS AND THE PASSION THAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO GET A PERSONA??? I started crying honestly, because it was just so smart. And looking back on it now, its obvious!! Of course it would lead to this, it only made sense that the culmination of her character arc leads to her getting a persona, nothing else would have been as good. Also, her voice actor is just amazing?? When she was talking to ichinose at the end, i actually got incredibly emotional because of the line reads. Its just so spot on and it really captures the essence of sophia.

Muah. five stars Atlus. You got me. 

Ryuji <3!!!!

Oh man. Oh boy. Okay. so where do i start. 

Yall know i love him. Hes probably my favorite fictional male character of all time, and he is the one i was the absolute most cynical about in this game. I was expecting literally nothing. Nothing. Like. nothing. I thought he was just gonna keep being used as a joke, or a gag, and he’s gonna be super horny all the time for the other girls and it was gonna make me mad and there was gonna be some insane homophobic/queerphobic jokes in every other scene and i know i was being unfair, but i cant help it. 

And then i played the first two hours of the game, and i cried the entire time. Because ryuji has never been better than he is in this game. Its crazy. 

The ryuji in persona 5 strikers is who ryuji should have been/how he should have been treated this entire time. From the actual funny jokes (for example, the gold bar joke + his reaction to it in the beginning of the game), defending his female friends instead of being the one people need to defend from (natsume arc), and the fact that he was the one to be there with morgana and akira in the very beginning of the game. Its such a small thing that they didnt even need to do, but it was such an integral part of the original game for me, that i just was convinced that nothing like this was going to happen. But then it happened. Its just small stuff like that that could have been overlooked but it wasn’t because this game? Persona 5 strikers? Fucking loves ryuji. 

The actual respect they gave this boy is insane and i wasn't ready for it. Like, they gave the shujin trio lunch, they gave the little charm of the katana when they were in natsume’s jail, and, in my opinion this is the second-best thing that they could have given ryuji is sophia. Ryuji and sophia are the pinnacle of a brother & sister bonding relationship in the game that isn’t akira & futaba. And its really prevalent too?? Small stuff from the beginning of the game (pulling her out of a jail, calling her shorty), but then you have the iconic “shut the fuck up” scene, and that scene was so well characterized and written and voice acted, that somehow him saying “fuck” was the least exciting part of that scene to me. Ryuji is an older brother to her, like its undoubtable, and its only further cemented at the end of the game where Ryuji helps out ichinose because he knows how much sophia cares about her. This game. Love ryuji. And i love. This game. 

You know what else i love? Akiryu. 

Guys. i was fully prepared to starve in terms of akiryu. But theres just. So much of it. I wont get too deep into it, because i think this aspect of the game for me still needs marinate a little bit. Like, what was that last shot when EMMA died and Ryuji walked to approach Akira so they could relish in their victory together?? And the smile from both of them??? What the fuck. That was amazing. Also Joker being saved by Ryuji when he was about to fall from the cliff to save sophia??? WHAT. The LEADER AND HIS RIGHT HAND MAN? WHAT. anyway. If theres anything i want to keep for myself in my own brain, its the akiryu aspect of this game, so i wont talk too much about that part of things (instead, itll probably manifest in fic lmfaooo). 

Sure, there’s tidbits of stuff i dont like that they gave ryuji: sexualizing ann in that one cut scene and making him touch the jails even though it hurts, and i recognize those and frown at them, but for the most part, i am blown away with how they treated him.

Basically, Ryuji has never been better. From the opening of the game with him being the first text message and the one to sling his arm around akira, to the very last cut scene where it was ryuji wordlessly leaving because he’s so confident that they would never be separated for long, this game adores Ryuji and i am so so happy to say that.

The Royal aspect of things

Yeah, i had to talk about this, but itll be a short thing i just wanted to point out. Because the last part of this game...is persona 5 royal. Which is curious. Like taking reality and giving that power to someone else so you dont have to experience suffering anymore? And even like, the final section just looked a lot like the top half of maruki’s palace?? And whats even crazier is that we had a boss fight with sophia, just like how we had a boss fight with sumire? Royal and Strikers have like, the same thesis statement. It’s kind of uncanny.It’s interesting, it’s like atlus came up with these two ideas, and then just decided they liked both of them so much that they just did it twice. I don’t mind though—actually, in terms of how the last Palace/Jails go, i probably like them both about equally. 

Though i did love the final battle in this one more than i did in royal. Splitting into teams?? Thats cool as fuck, and really innovative and i didnt see it coming. It also kicked my ass. A lot. 

Now for the last stretch: the small stuff!

The music — bomb as fuck. In my heart, Daredevil is ranked the same as Rivers. Axe to grind is also amazing, but Daredevil owns me

Akechi — i really debated whether or not to talk about him, but i figured a bullet point should be enough. Im really shocked that he wasnt in this at all. Like not even a name drop. If this is an OVA, and the point of the game is to please the fans, and akechi is arguably the fan favorite character, i was really ready for something. But there was nothing, except for the pancake hallway if that even counts as a reference. Thats it. Thats all i wanted to say about him.

The humour — FUCKING HILARIOUS im convinced that in my fifty hour playtime, five of that is dedicated to me laughing and unable to continue the game 

Akira — so much personality! His lines of dialogue are crazy sometimes (like. Whats up with him saying Ryuji has ‘nice abs’ when they were in bath? Im crazy and even i dont know what the fuck that could mean) 

Battle system — oh my god i almost forgot to talk about this. I love it! I kind of miss the turn based aspect just because i found it very comforting for some reason, but this hack and slash style of gameplay is so invigorating because i do feel like it justifies shit like the baton pass and huge attacks.  This battle system fully encompases how the Phantom Thieves are supposed to fight, you know what i mean?

Anyway, thats my thoughts on strikers. Loved it. Amazing. 9.3/10, wouldve been higher but Konoe’s Jail almost bored me to death. Also im a monster and i didnt do any requests that isn’t a fun one, teehee. As if i play persona 5 for the persona aspect of things.

[wakatoshine]

OF ROYALTY, POINTE SHOES, AND COUNTRY BOYS (kita x reader)

14: interhigh qualifiers: finals edition!

make sure to pay attention to when the texts stop and the written portions begin!

read more on this one since it’s a bit longer

i didn’t hold back on this one pls like it!!!

“hey shin,” your hushed voice rang through the line, “sorry for trying to call you this morning.”

you paused, who knew leaving a simple voicemail would be so difficult.

“um, i know you’re probably sleeping right now but i kinda need to say a few things that i didnt want to say over text,”

you paused, pressing your phone closer to your face as you search for your aoba johsai tracksuit among the discarded articles of clothing on the floor.

“i’m really scared for today, i hid it from the team since i know they’re really stressed out about it too. t’s not like i could say anything anyway, haji would get upset that i’m upset, god knows what tooru is going through right now, and talking it out with makki and mattsun would probably be awkward,”

you sighed

“but i’m really comfortable saying this to you even if it’s a recorded message,”

another heavy pause

“it’s just really hard never winning. we have such a good team, always have had one. but it’s just never enough. we’ve came second in every tournament and i’m just so tired” your voice hitched a bit at the last part.

“it’s always the same cycle, practice and improve, and then fall back down. i’m just tired of comforting everyone when we do obviously deserve to win,” you say, “not saying shiratorizawa doesn’t deserve it because they work hard too,” you added.

you look up at the clock over your door and slip your gym shoes on.

“anyway, sorry about dropping this on you. i just wanted to talk to someone who’d listen,” you stated with a small smile, “bye shin.”

your thumb pressed the end call button and you stepped out on the porch as close to ready as you’d ever be.

kita picked up on the second ring.

“hey,” you whispered and his heart almost broke right then.

to be quite honest, you looked like shit. you had oikawa’s track jacket on (he could tell since you were practically drowning in it), your eyes were swollen and red from crying, and your cheeks were crusted from the tears that weren’t still falling.

kita still thought you were beautiful, but he was more concerned about your well-being than his own surface attraction to you.

“talk to me,” was all he could get out.

“shin it hurts so much,” you said, shoulders shaking as you sobbed, “i just keep thinking about what i could’ve done better. i could’ve encouraged them more, taken better stats, helped make better-“

“hey stop that,” kita interrupted, his eyebrows furrowing in thought as you looked at him with big doe eyes.

“remember what i said about my team motto?” he asked.

you nodded with an added sniffle.

“i said that ya need to leave yer losses behind. don’t forget them, but use them to move on and learn how to be better.” he said.

you were silent, so kita continued.

“ya can keep blamin yerself and asking what if, but yer not gonna get anythin outta it,”

you nodded and tried your best to smile, “thanks shin. i think that’s the best thing you could have told me.”

kita hummed in response and the two of you sat in comfortable silence for a bit.

after a few minutes you closed your eyes with a sigh. kita took the moment to study your face. he studied the way your lips were slightly parted, the way way your hair framed your face, and the way your lashes fluttered before your eyes opened back up and gazed into his own chocolate ones.

“hey shin?” you asked and this time kita’s heart began to race and heat rose to his cheeks (much to his dislike). he quite liked when you used his nickname.

“hmm?”

“can you tell me a story?” you asked.

“yeah,” he answered, anything for you he thought.

kita looked around before standing (with his phone of course so you could come along) and walking out of his room into the dimly lit hallway.

“gran?” he called.

your face flushed. kita shinsuke was too sweet for even your aching heart.

“yes shin chan?” a sweet voice that was completely foreign to you echoed through the kita residence.

“do ya still have those stories ya used to read me when i was a kid?” you heard him ask.

“yes hun, i’ll take some of ‘em to yer room okay? go back to talkin to that pretty lady friend of yers.” his granny responded, causing you to flush immediately.

you were pleasantly surprised to see that kita had turned red as well.

“i’m sorry she called ya that y/n,” kita apologized, “i told her about ya earlier and she is so eager to get to know ya,”

you giggled “there’s no need to apologize, i know i’m quite beautiful,”

“you are,” kita swallowed, “i think yer very beautiful,”

“you really think so?” you asked.

at that moment the distance between the two of you was too much. kita wanted nothing more than to wrap you in his arms and hold you until day break.

but he had to settle for this instead.

“yeah i think yer beautiful, y/n. i wouldn’t lie to ya,” he said in complete honesty.

you blushed and turned away from the phone, causing kita to laugh at you.

“don’t ya get shy on me now, i still have to tell ya a story,” kita said.

kita’s granny opened the door to kitas room a moment later and handed him an old copy of the little red riding rood.

you had waved at her before she left. she had smiled at you, saying that you were much prettier than kita had described.

you have never seen kita more flustered than in that moment.

twenty minutes passed and you were completely entranced by the way kita read to you. of course you’ve heard the story before, many times in fact, but the way kita read made you want to reach out and grasp every single word he let out.

you were sad when he concluded with a “the end” and gently closed the book shut.

kita grabbed his phone from where it was propped up on his night stand and moved it closer to his face so he could see you clearly.

he was happy to see that you had stopped crying awhile ago.

you were in a very cute position. you were curled up with your knees to your chest and your face was nuzzled up into the pillow with your eyes closed.

(unbeknownst to him, you had been imagining you were cuddled up against his chest instead.)

“are ya still there sleepyhead?” kita teased.

��i’m here shin,” you replied groggily.

“just makin sure,” kita said.

then something happened. kita had the best idea to ever come up in his head to date.

“hey y/n, remember when ya came over here and were our manager for a week?” he asked.

you scoffed, “of course i do shin! who do you take me for?”

kita smiled at your cheeky response. he momentarily forgot how to talk and he felt himself heat up as you looked at him curiously.

“well what if ya were our actin manager durin nationals? coach loved ya and so did the rest of the team, akagi would be happy, and i’d be able to see-“

you laughed, “okay shin you can stop rambling now,”

he looked at you with wide brown eyes.

“of course i’ll do it. i would never pass up a chance to see you,” you said, pink dusting your cheeks as you looked away from the camera.

kita’s heart has never been more full than it was in that moment.

alright that’s it for this one. i hope the written portion was fine! things will be happening faster from here on out since we are over halfway through the fic (maybe). im still not sure where i want to end this, so it could be 5 more chapters or it could be 20. you never know.

next.

[highpope]

Silver Keys - Ch. One

JJ Maybank x oc / Soulmate AU / Topper x oc

warnings: none, if there are any let me know!

Word Count: 2k ish

Notes: Hi guys, sorry this is so long overdue. I was fighting with this one. But i really wanted to update this story. It’s not my fave but that’s okay. ** As always, reblogs and feedback is welcome and appreciated. 

Masterlist - READ PROLOGUE FIRST :))

June sat at the piano she got for her 16th birthday. She had been saving up for years and finally had enough money for a keyboard. It wasn’t the same as the beautiful grand piano at her instructors, but it did the job. June nervously watched the clock tick down to midnight and tried to focus on the song she was trying to learn. If she came into lessons next week without having learned at least half of it she wouldn’t be on track to play at the recital in a few weeks. It was a big deal to her parents, and June too. The recital was on the mainland with tons of different kids from the surrounding areas. June had never gotten an opportunity to play and she wasn’t about to let worrying about her potential soulmate stop her. 

She took a deep breath and began to play. As the minutes turned to seconds, June was gracefully gliding her fingers up and down the keyboard, trying to make sense of the melodies, allowing the notes to soak into the room. 

On the morning of her birthday, June walked down the stairs into the kitchen to see a note and a box of donuts. It was Saturday, meaning both her parents were working and Olivia, her sister, was going to be sleeping the day away. June grabbed a powder sugar donut from the box and read the note: 

Happy Birthday, Love! We can’t wait to celebrate with you tonight. 

Have fun today, Mom and Dad

She smiles and folds the note up. June was just about to grab another donut when the doorbell rang. She looked at the time, 9:30. There’s no way any family member would be stopping by and Olivia’s friends wouldn’t show up unannounced. June opens the door to reveal JJ dressed in shorts and a light long sleeve t-shirt. 

“Happy birthday Ju Ju!” JJ exclaims.

June rolled her eyes, “God, please don’t call me that.” She opened the door wide to let him in. The nickname originated from June’s younger sister. They were five years apart and she couldn’t properly say June’s name for quite a while. So from ages 5 to 8, she was Ju Ju. 

“Nah, I think 18 is the year we bring it back,” JJ said, slinging his arm around her shoulders. 

“Absolutely not,” June says, tapping his cheek lightly, “Thanks though.” He smiles as she jumps up onto one of the stools in the kitchen, “what’s up?”

“You, miss birthday girl, have very important places to be. Go get dressed.” 

“Where exactly do I have to be?” 

“Well, first, Kie’s and then,” JJ motions like he is zipping his lips and throwing the key away. June narrows her eyes causing him to throw up his hands in defense. 

“Okay, fine, but don’t eat my donuts!” June runs up the stairs and begins to get ready. She decides on a blue tube top, shorts, and a white cropped jacket. She runs a brush through her hair and packs her swimsuit and a few other things in a drawstring before going down the hallway to leave a note for her sister. She tells her where she’s going to be and to call when she gets up. 

JJ and her drive to Kiara’a in his truck, the windows down and the radio stuck on the same channel it’s been on since he got it. They’ve learned to tolerate it. JJ was so proud of the truck when he first showed the pogues. He had gotten a busted down pickup from some guy on the island and fixed it up pretty much by himself. The rest of them promised to never make fun of it. 

“Happy Birthday!” The pogues yell when June opens the door. She can’t contain her laughter. Everyone is wearing pink sparkly party hats. Kie instantly comes over to her, throwing her arms around her neck, “baby is eighteen!” June squeezes back and accepts a hat identical to the rest and hands one to JJ who shuts the door behind them. 

“Looking good, boys.” June laughs at Pope and John B posing in their hats. 

“It’s the required attire didn’t you hear?” John B asks, kissing the top of June's head and Pope slinging an arm around her shoulders. They lead her through the kitchen and the sliding door to the outdoor patio. The lounge chairs are set up along with string lights and a birthday banner. It was perfect. The whole thing, being with her favorite people, the perfect weather. 

“You guys didn’t have to do all of this.” 

“But you deserve it. You’re always the first to do anything for the rest of us,” Pope says. 

“He’s right, Juney,” Kie says, smiling. 

“You’re a bunch of saps,” JJ says plopping into a chair. 

After spending the morning and early afternoon hanging out in Kie’s backyard, the five piled into the van and headed down to the beach. The boys were in the water before June could even set her stuff down. It was arguably not warm enough to swim, but that didn’t stop them. Kie and June decided to layout, occasionally sneaking a few drinks from the water bottle filled with alcohol. 

“So how are you feeling about the whole soulmate thing?” Kie asks, bumping her shoulder against June’s. 

To be honest, June had forgotten all about it. She could barely sleep last night she was so nervous, but now that it could happen whenever, she felt much better.

“Honestly okay.” She admitted.

“Do you think you already know who it is?”

“I mean that happens more often than not, right? Just look at our parents.” Kie’s parents had known each other in high school, having grown up on the island, but didn’t know they were soulmates until later down the line. That happens all the time. Whether or not it’s just coincidence or really is fate, June hadn’t decided yet. 

“I guess you’re right.” She paused before speaking again, “I don’t think I want to already know them. I don’t want to marry someone we went to high school with and be stuck here only for our kids to end up the same way.” Seeing Kiara open up like this made June wonder about her own future. 

“Don’t worry Kie, you’re gonna go somewhere cool like Australia and stop the wildfires and clean the oceans and fall in love with some really hot girl and leave us all behind forever.” 

She moved her sunglasses off her face to hold back her hair, “I could never leave you, but you really think so?”

“Of course. You’re going places. John B, JJ, and I are gonna be stuck here smelling like fish bait until we’re 80.” June gags.

Kiara laughs, making a disgusted face, “what about Pope?” 

“Nah, he’s too good for this place.” They both laugh so hard they don’t even notice the boys had made their way back to where they were laying.

“What’s so funny?” John B asks, shaking out his hair.

“Nothing,” Kie says with a smile on her lips. The boys share a knowing look before dropping it altogether. That’s when June’s phone chimes with a message from her sister. 

Mom said to make sure you were home soon for tonight. We’re almost all set up here.

I guess Aunt Morrane is coming:/

“No,” June groans at the last of Olivia’s message. 

“What’s wrong?” JJ asks, sitting down next to her. 

“My Aunt is coming to dinner tonight.”

“The horror!” John B mocks. 

“Stop! I’m serious. She’s a nutcase.” June replies, throwing a towel at his face. He catches it in one swift motion. 

“Ju it’s gonna be fine.” JJ said reassuringly, “I’ll drop you back off.” 

The pogues only stayed a little while longer before packing up their stuff into the van and parting ways once back at Kiara’s. 

“I won’t have any fun without you,” Kie begged before June got into the truck. 

“You’re gonna be fine.” The rest of the group was going to the first official kegger of the summer. June always missed it. She was sure she would hear all about it tomorrow when she would stop by the chateau with a bunch of water and ibuprofen in the morning to make sure they were all breathing. 

“Hey, thanks, J,” June says when JJ had pulled up in front of her house. 

“No problem,” he starts. June reaches for the door handle, “actually, I got you something.” 

Surprised, June says “You didn’t have to get me anything.” 

He waves her off and reaches into the glove compartment, pulling out a bracelet, “uh. It’s not wrapped or anything.” 

June examines the bracelet, it was a brown braided string with a single pearl threaded in the middle. 

“I love it.” 

“Really?” JJ asks, scrunching up his nose, “because it’s okay if you don’t I just thought-”

“No, no I do. Thank you,” June says and reaches up to kiss his cheek. Just then there is a loud pounding coming from the passenger side window, causing June to startle and drop the bracelet. Both June and JJ lean in to grab it off the floor of the car and smack heads. “Shit, sorry”

“Ow!” 

JJ finally grabs the bracelet and hands it back to her before they are both faced with Aunt Morrane opening the door and practically dragging her out of the truck. 

“You know,” her aunt starts, “darling, everyone is waiting inside.” 

“I’ll just be one second, I promise.” She says flashing a smile to her aunt and pleading eyes to JJ. He tries to hide his laughter. 

Aunt Morrane locks arms with June and begins walking up to their sidewalk, quite literally dragging her by her feet, and begins talking about this show she was watching.

“Happy Birthday, Ju Ju!” JJ yells from the truck. June tries to flip him off as discreetly as possible with her aunt still gripping on to her. 

At the door, her mother engulfs her into a hug, “Happy 18th, love.” 

“Thank you, mama.” 

“Was that JJ? You know he could've come in. We have enough food.”

“It’s okay, Mama, he had plans.” That satisfied her enough as she went to close the door and straight back into the kitchen. June took off her shoes and that’s when she heard it. It only lasted a minute and she couldn’t recite it if she was asked, but it was there. Faint, but clear. Just how Pope had described it. Just how everyone had described it. Her soulmate. 

taglist: @allycat449-blog @ifilwtmfc (hi im sorry I forgot to tag yall) 

** if you want to be added to the taglist let me know!!

[usertoxicyaoi]

The reaction was really interesting. I agreed with a lot of Bright’s point and it was nice to see a different perspective. I really wish they had showed it in the show. You can tell Bright is really attached to Sarawat and it hurts his heart to see the pain. It also showed me that the finale could have been loads better with a few cute scenes and a proper discussion. This is what Bright was talking about. At the end of the day it was the lack of communication.

Ahh I loved that reaction video and I loved seeing Bright talking about Sarawat’s point of view. I’m sure one of the reasons they bought him was the amount of shit he was getting from some people. This however also showed me what the show lacked. Though I loved 2gether.. most of the time we saw things were Tine’s perspective. It would have really been good to see it from Sarawat’s perspective in the last episode. You can also see Bright’s frustration at times with how they portrayed Sarawat.

I assume you watching the reaction video atm! Let me say this boy gives me heart attacks like how thoughtful he is and wants to explain sarawat’s every move since episode 12 and why he acted the way he acted. I felt like he kept it inside for so long that it needed to be spoken out like when he wanted to see a reaction from P’Jennie how he looked away and then right back at her. He was so stressed and on the edge the whole time! How he repeatedly said he’s sorry for Sarawat cause he knows that everyone was sorry for Tine but didn’t get to see/understand his side of version. He also zoned out in a couple of scenes like this boy has sooo many emotions and it feels it’s too overwhelming for him(I feel that at least). I’m so grateful that Bright exists and talk about loving a man and to feel love so freely!! He could’ve said so much in the end but instead it was more like an apology for hurting Tine and how his character works. He understands Sarawat so much. I’ll cry. I didn’t thought my opinion would be that long... he’s speaking so enthusiastically about Sarawat and what his character taught him. This boy is really a blessing for the 2gether + lgbt+ community I love him he’s a child like a babie :((

Bright just wants to smooch his co-star but the universe won’t let him.

hiii anons!!! i’m gonna combine all of your asks into one bc we’re all essentially talking about the same thing.

yeah. so. the ep 13 reaction video. lets talk about it.

firstly, i ... it will never cease to astound me just how much bright loves sarawat? he knows him with every fibre of himself. he knows sarawat right down to the tendon and bone of him. like. bright’s taken so much time out to character study sarawat, get into his psyche and mind and heart. and. i hate novel! sarawat, but, bright’s taken that character, and made it his own, completely transforming him. and that takes so much understanding and commitment and passion. truly, we don’t deserve bright. we really don’t. and i am so thankful we got bright to play sarawat. no body else could have done sarawat better than bright. so much so that like .... they both overlap, bright and sarawat. sometimes its hard to distinguish where sarawat ends and bright begins.

and like some of yall said, i think it was a very clever ... move (?) ... to star bright to react to ep 13, solo, without win. bc, like yall mentioned, and like im gonna dwell on now: 2gether was entirely from tine’s perspective. it reminds me a bit of skam, in that way, that ... ya know even tho i’ve watched skam and i should KNOW this, but i still forget just how POWERFUL perspectives are. and how much they influence your way of thinking. i touched upon this after ep 12, but now after watching bright react to the whole of ep 13, like, it comes back to that. we saw everything through tine’s eyes. and so, it felt like, sarawat’s side needed to be justified. but it could never be done on the show bc the show was about tine’s perspective. and the only way it could have been done, is if they both would have talked.

which brings me onto my next point, that bright mentions - the biggest barrier and fault was they both don’t know how to talk. i touched upon this just yday actually, how sarawat is someone who doesn’t know how to talk, he’s more of a do-er (like bright said), whereas tine is someone who overthinks himself to the point of sickness and anxiety and so he doesn’t know how to voice that out, and like bright said, tine is someone who is EXTREMELY obedient - if someone says something to him to do, tine will go along and do that and won’t say no to them. which means that tine himself has had very little experience of going with his gut and how he feels, and when he comes face to face in a situation like that, it becomes Very overwhelming for him.

so, it was really clever to have bright on, solo, to explain everything from his and sarawat’s perspective. especially the bit where bright was like “everytime someone flirted with tine, wat never once questioned his trust for tine or their love, he would go directly to the person in question and deal with them.” and ... ya know, that’s more easier for sarawat to do, than it is for tine, who isn’t like that at all - like bright said, tine is the more obedient one who just follows along everybody else’s suggestions and has never really used his agency to decision make for himself.

and so ... yeaah. like. people sent a LOT of verbal abuse to bright after ep 12. and bright even said he knew it would happen, bc the entire series is from tine’s perspective, he understood that from well before. so he says he was prepared, but he still didn’t come on social media that often bc he got so much verbal abuse over it. 

and like, i’ve said before, just like how jennie and go said in the reaction video, that we should have got less flashbacks in the finale, and instead, we could have had a more sweeter scene. that could have been and should have been a proper, open and honest conversation between tine and sarawat, or, as bright suggested, a kiss. so, ya know, as some people were saying that maybe bright was just uncomfortable about kissng win??? no. no he wouldnt be AT ALL. it just ... never occured in the script. but yeah. i think .......... it really did get to bright - that sarawat never on the show got a chance to explain. 

which honestly makes me feel like thats why half the time he would improvise as sarawat? and add in things he KNOWS sarawat would/should do bc he KNOWS the depths of his love for tine so he used those moments so smartly to show that (a sign of v v v good acting!!!). like a marriage proposal, or putting tine’s hand over his shoulder, or adding in cheek kisses. like. bright’s really gone over and beyond for sarawat and tried to show just how intensely in love wat is with tine, with the little space and room for manoeuvre that he got granted.

idk if the some of scripts were written in a rush? i mean, 2gether was the FIRST show from gmmtv to air in 2020 - if i’m correct???? - so, between november to february, the had to get everything shooted and done, but they MUST have started script writing earlier than that. idk ... 

personally, i do wish we did get some more of the novel scenes in the show. like, sarawat and tine coming out to sarawat’s dad was SUCH a BEAUTIFUL scene in the novel but we never got it on the show. why? bc it was from sarawat’s perspective, not tine’s. another really nice scene, is the cinema scene where they held hands, but on the show we got a different version of it, where instead, they talked about a happy or tragic ending before tine decides to accept being wat’s boyfriend and they hug (i like that scene though, purely bc we got to see win’s crying which was !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AMAZING! and the hug was SUPER sweet!). 

but yeah, it .... idk. seeing bright in that reaction video in some moments Hurt. bc .... there was so much he wanted to say but he kept it in. and he’d just glance and sigh and look down or away bc he GETS sarawat in a way i think nobody else does. and so ..... had the show had more time, or was able to cut out some scenes and replace them with other and rewrite bits, we could have gotten sarawat’s perspective, and not had the show completely butcher sarawat’s image in ep 12 the way they did, only for them to then have less than one episode, a finale no less, to save his face again, whilst also tying up every other plot at the same time. 

like, bright has SO MUCH to offer as sarawat. and bright says he doesnt know about a season 2 (yet), but, ya know, if we ever got to see tine and sarawat again, i kinda wish they allow bright more freedom - bc he understands his character a lot more better than the writers do, i feel. he gets sarawat on soul deep level. so i just wish they’d give bright more freedom to be sarawat. and i have no doubt that, if that had been the case, we would have gotten a LOT more physical intimacy between tine and sarawat. i’m not mad about the lack of it, but, i’m assuming that bright would have really made sarawat be a lot more physical with tine. but at the same time, i agree with bright when he said that tine and wat are people who show their affections to one another in private - which is why i am SO ...... upset that we never got to see tine and wat ALONE in the one year later scene, bc, like i said, they WOULD have been a LOT LOT LOT more intimate then. but they weren’t alone. so they weren’t intimate. which. yeah. 

but at the same time, ya know, bright’s so .... like. he gets where the hurt for tine stems from. just like how he gets sarawat’s character, he gets tine’s too. but like he said, he’s lived and breathed wat since day one - and so, i think he just really wanted a chance to explain everything from sarawat’s point of view. he really didn’t need to apologise at all, and yet he did, on behalf of wat hurting tine. 

so whilst i know its just said that oh ya know bright should just write the whole of s2, i kinda wish, if we were to get one, that they writers would sit down and LISTEN to bright and win and take some input of theirs in, since, they’re the ones who KNOW their characters and play them. 

but yeah, bright’s mind. his intellect. his knowing of sarawat ............. it will never cease to amaze to me just how dedicated he was at an emotional and psychological level to play sarawat.

[idontwanttospoiltheparty]

Ive never really understood the hype surrounding Taylor Swift - I mean, I like some of her songs, but im not big on modern pop music so generally she just doesn’t really click for me. But I find it interesting that theres quite a few of Beatles/Swift blogs - like, they should have very little in common given that they’re from completely different eras and all, but somehow people seem to find a lot of semblance between the two. << and thats not me shitting on any of these blogs btw! Hope I don’t come off as rude or condescending there <3

Anyway, I was just wondering what got you into Taylor Swift? (I think ive read your post on how you got into the Beatles)

Hi, anon! Don't worry, I don't think you're rude or condescending! I agree they don't have too much in common and I don't really like their music for the same reasons.* I do have a playlist of Paul songs that have similar vibes to Taylor songs but it's mostly lyric-based. (Also the Beatles For Sale songs actually have quite the Taylor-tinge because Paul and John were not immune to Country Music)

I saw @stewy say once that a possible reason there are a good handful of us Swiftie-Beatle People on here is the appeal of a vast discography, which I agree with. If you have an artist/group with 200ish songs, it's just really fun to really dive into their work and explore all the facets. I also think: we're talking about the most popular band of all time and one of the highest-selling artists of the 21st century. They have a lot of fans so there's bound to be overlap, regardless of musical differences.

Moving on to your question: Getting into Taylor was an extremely personal experience for me and so my explanation is probably going to be kind of long so I'll put it under a read more.

It was spring-summer 2014, I was 15. I had heard the more popular songs of hers starting with Love Story and enjoyed pretty much all of them (I always found her hopelessly romantic point of view fascinating) but before I got a Spotify account in 2013 it was difficult in general for me to really get into an artists' entire discography so most of her songs had flown under my radar.

At the time, I was in this very weird sort of codependent online friendship with this girl who was basically my first real best friend and my first more or less crush. She was very depressed and I was very much in an I Could Fix Her™ mood, except that I obviously couldn't fix her and it made me feel like I wasn't enough and she had begun pulling more and more away from me and not replying to my messages and it was simply driving me insane. I consider it the saddest period in my life.

at some point during this period, I started trying to connect with other people (all online, I didn't know how to talk seriously to anyone IRL) and explaining the issues I'd been having, and one of the people who brought me joy and whom I actually felt not drained talking to was a huge swiftie. And IDK the fact that she loved Taylor and the fact that talking to her made my life better (and also the fact that I liked all the Taylor songs I knew at that point) just made me decide to give her a listen. And I think that whole "large discography discovery" phenomenon really helped me at the time (funny, because her discography has doubled since then). It gave me something new to focus on; there were just so many songs to discover, all telling such rich stories. I also have always loved bridges, they are almost always my favourite part of a song. And Taylor, god-bless her, loves them too and always puts her ALL in them. Like pretty much every bridge of hers brings the song to the next level, and even a lot of her songs I don't adore tend to have great bridges (Stay Stay Stay and Paper Rings come to mind). I think one of her most underrated qualities is how good she is at song structure and really building up an entire musical journey with a song. She also almost always adds cool ad-libs in her second and third choruses to keep the songs interesting and dynamic (or at least since she's gone pop). Anyways, back to the story: Then Taylor announced 1989 as her next album and released Shake It Off, and it was just like this great happy thing for me to look forward to, when I had very little keeping me going. The era was promoting a lot of happiness which in hindsight was slightly fabricated and it was just a really great thing for me to latch onto.

At the same time I was coming to realize that I was gonna have to pull away completely from my friend and all those break-up songs just… Hit, y'know? Like, some people seem to think Taylor's a one-trick pony because she likes to write break-up songs but to me, break-ups are just like this moment where you as a human can potentially feel every single emotion, and Taylor's songs have covered every facet of the concept. Here are some songs I remember from that period, that all meant a lot to me at the time because they explained my own pain to me so well:

Haunted, for the absolute terror you feel in the first moments you realize someone is probably gonna leave you. Come on, come on / Don't leave me like this / I thought I had you figured out / Something's gone terribly wrong / You're all I wanted.

I Almost Do, for the inner turmoil you feel when you know you have to stay away from someone for your own good but you really, really have to resist just running back to that person. We've made quite a mess, Babe / It's probably better off this way / And I confess, Babe / In my dreams you're touching my face / And asking me if I wanna try again / With you / And I almost do.

Last Kiss, for that absolute sadness that comes simply with remembering everything that was good and not comprehending how it could've possibly ended. I still remember / The look on your face / Lit through the darkness / At 1:58 / Words that you whispered / For just us to know / You told me you loved me / So why did you go / Away?

Forever and Always, for that feeling of desperately wanting to hold on to what you still have but at the same time realizing it probably isn't going to last and having no idea how to fix it, plus feeling like the other person doesn't even care. So here's to everything / Coming down to nothing / Here's to silence / That cuts me to the core / Where is this going? / Thought I knew for a minute / But I don't anymore.

Dear John, my all-time favourite song, for that moment you find clarity and realize that you deserved better and that you were headed in an extremely dark direction because of this other person. [DISCLAIMER: my friend did NOT abuse me nor did we have some inappropriate age difference. But the way she would ignore me and her general moodiness really affected my own mental health and self-worth problems] You paint me a blue sky / And go back and turn it to rain / And I lived in your chess games / But you changed the rules every day / Wondering which version of you I might get on the phone / Tonight / Well I stopped picking up / And this song is to let you know why.

(She's covered more aspects of break-ups in other songs [cheating, divorce, feeling awkward around your ex amongst others], these are just the ones I remember being really important to me when I was first getting into her)

She really helped me feel a lot less alone during one of my loneliest periods and I really can't thank her enough for that. Soon after this, I started crushing on a girl in my class and Taylor's love songs started to take on a new meaning for me as well.

What's crazy to me is, when she went on hiatus for a few years, a part of me thought maybe I'd grown out of her and no longer had much in common with her, but when reputation came out I was pulled right back into my love for her as a person and musician and then when Lover came out I found that she was still explaining feelings to me better than I ever could (specifically with the songs The Archer and Cornelia Street). And now with folklore and evermore she's simply absolutely perfected her story-telling and I find myself deeply moved even by the songs I don't directly relate to. I feel like she has this amazing ability to find the absolute truth in the specific. I've never had a summer romance with someone who already had a girlfriend and mostly wanted to go back to her, and yet the bridge of august feels so real to me, y'know?

Back when we were still changin' for the better Wanting was enough For me, it was enough To live for the hope of it all Cancel plans just in case you'd call And say, "Meet me behind the mall" So much for summer love and saying "us" 'Cause you weren't mine to lose

It's hard to explain but looking at this, like it's so much more than the story it's telling. It's talking about how when you're young you really need so little to feel satisfied; how sometimes the idea of someone maybe spending time with you is better than actually doing things with other people; and how if someone using you without much thought can make you feel like you're not even entitled to grieve what you lost. Sorry. I'll stop. Don't want to go insane.

So, all of this is very personal and unique to me, but I think really the main thing that draws me to her is how vulnerable and honest she is about emotions, how eloquently she can explain the pain of being alive to me. Some people think she isn't the strongest singer, but I think, much like John actually, one of her greatest assets is how good she is at projecting emotion. The song happiness is a song I think has some lyrically weak moments but her vocal performance on it is so raw and devastating that every single line works even when, looking at it on paper, it feels like it shouldn't.

Hope this rambling made sense to you, lmao?? I love talking about Taylor though so thanks for the ask! Also very open to giving song recs if you do want to check her out more but I won't unless solicited to lmao *Sort of off-topic but I do think there's a relation between my fascination with the Beatles' history and my love for a great break-up song. I like pain I guess :)

[doubleshotofsomething]

Needy

[This is my submission for @sourpatchkidsandacokecan​ ‘s Little Darlin’s Mystery AU challenge. This is a three part soulmate au inspired by the song “Needy” by Ariana Grande, the prologue and epilogue do not count as part one/three.]

The person you’re supposed to be with, isn’t always the one you’re meant to be with.

Summary: You can’t fight fate and expect the battle to be fair.

Pairings: Bucky x Reader, Wanda x Bucky

Warnings: anst (ANGST), abuse (im so sorry), panic attack mentions, mental disorder references, attempted murder (for like 5 seconds tho), absolutely no fluff (if it looks like fluff then it’s a lie). Please be warned, im bad at warnings but this may be a triggering chapter so proceed with caution.

Prompts: soulmate au. song prompt

---

Prologue Part One Part Two

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 Part Three: [ How you even think it got this far?]

"What-- the fuck did you do?"

You blink at him, eyes wide with anticipation as you watch him assess the situation.

The party was still going on somewhere in the tower. It was fun, for the first hour. Then it got boring, so you found Sam, a bottle of whiskey, and ditched to the residential floor.

Sam is next to you, expression matching yours as you both feign innocence – you more than him.

"This is—" Nat pauses, walking further into the room and stopping just a few feet to your right. "—this is actually cute."

"Thank you," the words slip out of your mouth far too quick for your control. Your eyes widen at your admission and you squeak as Sam jabs at your side with his elbow. "ouw!"

You glare at him and he glares back, head nodding to a slowly angering Bucky.

"You—" Bucky grits his teeth, picking up one of the swans you had made with the dress, "—you ruined it."

"We improved it." Sam chimes in, earning a pitiful elbow from you.

The swans were terrible. The internet wasn't as helpful as you had thought it would be and making a swan out of cloth was surprisingly harder than you thought it be too. Especially when you do it after Sam found Thor's secret stash of Asgardian mead.

"Twas actually harder than you'd think," You find yourself adding, "google isn't that user friendly."

"—and the instructions were in hieroglyphs." Sam nods, facing scrunching up in confusion and then he turns to look at you. "You speak hieroglyphs?"

You shake your head at that. "I think it was Korean—"

"—it couldn't have been."

"How would you know? You don't even speak it hieroglyphs—"

"Widow probably speaks it—"

"She could have translationed it for us! Why didn't we think of that!"

Nat blinks at you both, eyebrows furrowing as her eyes land on a flask next to one of the swans. "Oh."

Bucky is shaking, the sound of metal plates shifting echoes in the room as his eyes land on the beads scattered on the table. He looks back at the remnants of the dress in his hands, and he can't find it in himself to calm down. Not when he knows what this dress means, not when you know what it means to him.

"Steve made us do it." You say, smiling innocently at him.

Sam shrugs. "Yeah, definitely."

"It was a pretty shit dress—" Nat adds, nodding her head as she picks up a swan. "This is justice."

"Also, it's bad luck to see the—" You pause, hiccup, and frown as the word escapes you, "—female groom?"

You look to Sam for assistance and pout, he shrugs. "Don't look at me, I wanted to make ducks."

"Yeah, but ducks are difficult to make—" You pause, "—my battery is still at 40%, I know where the suits are."

He grins, wide and devilishly. "I'll look for the other flasks."

 You don't get to make ducks or get the suits. You end up hanging over Bucky's left shoulder as he barrels his way down to the parking lot, stomach churning from your position and completely uncomfortable.

"At least let Steve mandle me, he’s nicer." you try to push yourself up, hands pressing into his back as you try to find some comfort.

Steve chuckles as he watches you pout from in front of him. In his hands are the keys to Sam's car and your purse, along with your coat and gloves.

"Manhandle is the word you're looking for, doll." Steve says, unlocking the car and opening the back door.

Bucky places you inside, surprisingly gentle, as compared to his brutish behaviour, and practically growls at you when you try to wiggle away from him.

"Sit. Still." His words come out through gritted teeth as he clips your seatbelt in place. "Don't even think about it."

You move your hands away from the seat belt clip slowly and feign innocence. "Can I at least say bye to Cap?"

The door slams shut before you even finish your sentence, but you still yell out a goodbye anyway while Bucky yanks open the driver's side door.

He gets in gracefully, throws your stuff onto the passenger seat roughly, and speeds out of the Tower's underground parking before the doors even fully open.

He's quiet the entire drive to your place, tense and stiff in his seat. You're fidgeting in your seat behind him – poking at the back of his neck and trying to get him to open a window— completely unremorseful.

It baffles him, the lengths you're willing to go to get your point across. The damage you're willing to do. It completely blows his mind, the things you're capable of doing – just to get what you want.

He tells you that, as he carries you up to your apartment. Continues to tell you that, as you retch into the toilet and then helps you change into your pyjamas. Doesn't even stutter as he goes on while making you finish up the coffee he made.

You glare at him and his control falters, frowns at that uncanny familiar sensation gripping at the base of his skull.

"—it's not like she was gonna wear it, anyway." You mutter, taking a gulp of the coffee, "you can't marry her now."

"Wha—" his voice cracking cuts him short, a shiver races through him as he tries to blink.

You're sitting on the counter, trapped between both of his arms on either side of you, and he breaks eye contact to look down at the cup in your hand.

"She knows that we're mates," you continue, completely oblivious. "She's great, I like her, honestly. But she can't fight fate, or nature. It would've made cents—scents—" you frown, and glare at the crown of Bucky's head, as if you'll find the word you're looking for there. "—whatever. It doesn't matter. Neither does this wedding, because— come on, let's be honest. No one wants to be with our kind, it’s too risky. We are the defamation of— deformation— what?"

He should find this cute. He usually does. But he can't, not now, not when he can feel the sweat pooling at the back of his shirt. Not when that prickling feeling is clawing up his spin, that trickle of fear – foreign and yet familiar –  why was it so familiar?

"Stop—" he rasps, pushing himself away from you, putting as much distance between the both of you as possible.

You frown, setting the cup down and slide of the counter. "Buck—" your knees knock when you land on your feet, and you have to grab onto the counter to keep you from falling. "—Bucky?"

"Stop." His hands are in his hair, gripping furiously as he shut his eyes. "No."

He has done this before, deflecting from the topic at hand, changing it in a way that made you not want to touch it.

Coffee mugs crushed in his hands. I'll talk to her, don't worry about it.

Fists slammed into dinner tables. For fuck's sakes, I said I'll do it, it's been a really stressful weak as it is.

Doors banged off their hinges. Wanda is not some mate-stealing monster, damnit! I won't have you shit-talking her like this.

Broken plates scattered on the floor, while on their way to the kitchen. Are you fu— doll, please, I didn't come here to fight. Okay? Let's just... not, right now.

You had listened, each time, because he was there with you and not with her. You let him deflect every time, because he needed that from you, and you could never deny him – not that you'd try. You had listened and, in turn, the wedding wasn't called off.

You were done listening.

"You can't walk away every time I bring this up, Buck—" you follow him into the living room, "—I'm not some groupie you can't shake. I'm your soulmate, and you're gonna have to face that fact sooner, rather than later."

"Just—" he breathes out, "—stop talking, for once."

"You can't seriously be mad at me, right now—"

You need to stop.

"I'm not wrong for wanting us to be together, and you know that." You point out, frowning as the chair he’s leaning against begins to crack under his grip. "—okay, fine. We can change the topic, if it's that upsetting!"

He really needs you to stop.

There's a tug at your chest, faint but strong enough to make you look down in confusion, before you realise it's the matebond.

Except, the pull feels different this time. It's an uncomfortable sting, leaving a bitter taste in your mouth, and you frown. It has never felt like this, not even when you had first found Bucky, never this... this... alarming?

You look up at your mate and you think that's why. You think it's because he's distressed, that this is serious, that it's another one of his attacks.

So, you go to him, because you need to. Because the feeling won't relent. Because it's in your nature to be what he needs you to be.

The stinging seems to worsen the closer you get, furious as it spikes an increase in your heart rate, and you hate yourself for a second – knowing that you've caused this. This is happening because you went on a rampage and ruined Wanda's wedding dress.

She liked that dress. You know that because he told you. Because it was bought on the same day that you had met Bucky. Because he couldn't stomach the thought of her never being able to wear it for their wedding, once it's called off...

And you decided to turn into swans.

His hand is on you, around your throat, backing you into a wall as it squeezes.

It takes a couple of seconds for you to register, to realise what is happening. And, for some reason, all you can think about was how it was the first time he used his hand –  his actual hand – to touch you.

And, suddenly, you prefer the left hand.

--

It's too late.

By the time he comes to, you're already on the floor.

You're unconscious, your cheeks are wet and your neck is bruising.

He's standing over you, confused. He calls your name, shakes you, but you don't wake.

There's a pulse, he checked, and you're breathing, he double-checked.

He can still feel you, so he tells himself that that's a good sign as he carries you to bed. He sets a bottle of water on your nightstand, charges your phone for you, and scribbles down a note.

Call me when you wake up.

He can't seem to start the car, or remember why you ended up on the floor, so he calls Steve.

He doesn't tell him what happened over the phone, but he does when he arrives. He tells him what he can remember, about the yelling and then putting you to bed and that blank gap between the two.

Shit, Buck. Steve swears, so he knows it's bad.

You're going to hate him in the morning, he knows this, but why isn't he feeling the bond pull him to you. To fix this.

That's what it usually does, doesn't it?

That's why he always came back after every fight, isn't it?

There would be the fighting and arguing and the breaking of things. You would kick him out and ignore him. He would feel bad and make up for it, he had to – he always had to. He could never fight that feeling.

Why wasn't it there, now?

--

Wanda was there when you woke.

Bruce was there, too. Checking you, helping you, telling you what to do and what not to do.

You're all quiet, except for Bruce as he speaks only when necessary. She's in the background, leaning against your dresser, while you try to go about your morning routine in the afternoon.

Bruce called your work and put in a sick leave for you, had Dr Cho sign a sick note for you. He even scheduled an appointment with Cho for you, a proper scan once you can get out of bed.

You blame the mead, how could you not? It had to be it, because there is no way, in heaven or hell, that Bucky could...

Bruce only stays for as long as he needs too. He's a match, the thread match, and he can't stay away from Nat for too long. So, he leaves… she doesn't.

It's awkward, as expected, and ugly and anxiety inducing.

You ruined her wedding dress, cut it into pieces and turned it into a plaything for you and Sam. You remember that part because you did it while you weren't completely shitfaced.

She's marrying the man that you want, the man that's supposed to be yours, and it would be easy to get you out of the picture – get rid of you so you wouldn't put Bucky through this anymore. But she doesn't, because she understands.

She understands because you don't know.

You don't know what they did to him, what they had to do to get him to be the soldier they wanted. You don't know what he went through, what they put him through when he resisted.

And he could never tell you that. Because it's not your fault that they used your bond to turn him into a monster. It's not your fault that they turned the only good thing he had, the one thing that was his, into a weapon. He couldn't tell you that...

"He's in Wakanda." Wanda says softly, eyes locking on yours as you both watch each other from opposite ends of the room. "Bucky."

You want to ask why, she can tell, so she explains.

"When he was put under, again, we thought—" she swallows, rubbing circles in her chest to ease the knot, "—we thought that he could be..."

You give a slight nod of understanding, adjusting the continental pillow behind you back.

You knew what Hydra had done to him, what they had turned him into. Anyone who was anyone knew.

"So," she sighs, "when he came back to the team, we all thought he was okay. I thought he was okay, I mean—I checked to make sure he was okay... But... we know, now that he wasn't. I didn't think it could happen, especially not now. I mean—"

She pauses and looks at you. You can see the struggle on her face, the hesitance to continue, and you frown.

Wanda found out about you on the same day that Bucky did. He told her immediately, over the phone, didn't even wait until she got back to the compound.

He said it didn't change anything, that your presence didn't change anything, but she knew.  She knew it did.

He couldn't balance between her and a mate, she didn't want him to. So, he decided to introduce you to each other.

She liked you instantly, how could she not? You were exactly what she expected Bucky's mate to be, and more. But he didn't care.

She wanted to call things off, but he wouldn't listen to reason. She wanted him to understand, to know that she wouldn't hate him if he didn't choose her. Because she knew better; fate had chosen, and it wasn't her.

It's my choice, he persisted. And I love you. She'll just have to understand, because I'm not leaving you.

You were fate's choice for him.

But he had had enough of people choosing for him; the army, hydra, the UN, and now, you?

No one knows what's best for me, except for me. We're getting married and that's final.

He wouldn't back down and she couldn't fight him. She loved him more than she could ever understand, who was she to choose for him?

"Hydra did things, things that shouldn't be possible," she continues, her voice steadier than she expected. "Once they had their hands on the tesseract, they did things to him that — I don't think we can fix…"

You can feel him, sort of... it's barely there, the bond, but you can still feel him.

She folds her arms across her chest. "Whatever you said last night, whatever it is you did— it triggered him back."

You blink. Once. Twice. Then, all at once, it sinks in and your stomach tightens.

"What?" Is your reaction, whispered and you can barely register the voice as yours.

"They're gonna try and reverse it, like before—" Wanda rushes the words out, but it's too late. Her previous words are already sitting on your chest and you're finding it hard to breathe. "—they've done it once; they can do it again—"

The realisation hits you, hard, and you have to force yourself to breathe.

Because now you understand why, you know why the link had felt that way – why the ache intensified as you got closer to him.

"I threw the bond in his face," your voice cracks and your throat aches as you speak. "I told him that— oh."

It was warning you, the bond, and you ignored it. It was feeling threatened, and you ignored it.

How could you be so selfish?

Wanda is sitting in front of you before you can even blink, trying to calm you down, begging you to calm down, to breathe...

Damn it, why couldn't you breathe?

"I can never have him, can I?" You're gasping, practically wheezing, and your nails dig into Wanda's arm.

The pain is there, she feels it, but she's too busy worrying about your escalating heart rate to focus on it. "Y/N, please, breathe—"

You're shaking your head, frantic and harder than your headache can handle. "What did I do— what did I do— what did I do—"

"Hey—hey— hey, look at me!"

"I ignored it—" your chest hurts and you don't understand why, "—it was, it was here—" you let go of her arm to pat your chest, "—right here, it was here. The bond. I could feel it. And he was begging me to stop and trying to leave, but I didn't listen— Wanda, I didn't listen—"

Wanda doesn't know what to do, not even Bucky had gotten this bad before. This was new territory for her.

You were too far gone to listen to anything she was saying, and she was too busy panicking to know what to do. How does she fix this?

"I need you to calm down, please— oh my god!"

"Why wouldn't I listen? I just wanted him to— you know? I just wanted him to choose me—"

"Y/N! Y/N! Please, I need you to—"

"Because I didn't— I just wanted to have him. And now— I broke it. It's broken. I broke it, Wanda. I broke it—how could I— he needed me to just— and I broke it—"

"Sam— help me! I don't know what's happening— she won't stop— "

 --

It was unchartered territory.

Reversing the trigger through the matebond wasn't possible, especially when the stones had been returned to their timelines.

The only option they had, that Shuri could provide, was completely erasing every single one of his memories. Every, last, one.

Clean slate. No Wanda, or Steve, or you.

You would still remember though, everyone will. So, there really wasn't a point.

You told Wanda – days later, when you were well enough to leave for your appointment with Dr Cho and found her there –  it wouldn't be necessary.

"He doesn't have to go under," you said, fidgeting with hem of the hospital. "I'll stop... I'll stop everything."

She shook her head, ready to protest. "You don't have to do any of that, I'm not going to marr—"

"Please do." You stopped her, shaking your head. You'd done enough damage as it is. "He chose you. He's fought me at every turn because he wants you. I'm not—"

Why was it so easy to say all this?

"I'll still be there, when he needs me— for whatever it is, but only for that. He's yours," he doesn't want me anyway, "We're mates, not matches, we don't have to be together for this to work—"

"You don't know what you're saying—"

"The world has taken enough from you— I've taken enough from you, Wanda. Let me give you this, at least."

You could live without him. You've done it before.

How hard could it be?

Tagging: @sourpatchkidsandacokecan​ , @decadentsoulbiscuitgoth​ [sorry i took so long, won’t happen again :) xx]