#im getting a follow up appointed since i got some blood tests prescribed so we’ll see

[no-wings-no-angel]

CW: Ventpost with mentions of self-destructive ideation such as self harm in a PMDD context, some bad experiences with alternative medicine and spiritual cures.

I have a suspect I might suffer from PMDD or something adjacent, so I told my doctor about symptoms such as hopelessness, feeling like harming myself, feeling like everyone hates me, the list goes on, only to then have my period and just going “ah. so that was it.” And how despite me knowing I feel like that because of my cycle doen’t make it less uncomfortable and painful to feel like this once a fucking month.

She just. Just fucking showed me a silly PMS meme said it was very normal to feel like that and prescribed that Rescue Remedy that is basically watered down brandy.

I have no idea what the profile of the rest of her patients is but I feel like someone going in and saying they feel like dying by their own hand is not like, you know, normal and average and absolutely brush-off-able.

Also she prescribed that seed on the outer part of the ear treatment but I’m not doing that. No shame on acunpucture but. No. Just no. It just looks a lot like pseudoscience stuff I’ve been through. Alternative medicine overall makes me a bit uncomfortable.

I have a history of having my mental health concerns treated like something that can be solved by alternative medicine or religious practices such as magnets, fitotherapy, teas, herbal baths, blessings and religious iniciations. I also have been called an indigo child several times. It feels just like a way to explain away my pain like “is not that you are suffering, you are just built different and that is actually really good for the Earth and Space and you should become a medium or something! Feeling suicidal is actually a symptoms that your soul is not from this planet and you want to go home! You are an empath and special!”

Needless to say I don’t believe any of that shit and actually got an autism diagnosis recently.

This experience just catapulted me way back to my 14 y.o. stage of neglected concerns. I’m just so tired of this shit.

Still I’ll take the brandy drops because why the fuck not. Also the internet said it is supposed to be taken as a crisis med but the bottle literally says to take 4 drops 3 times a day, I’m confused.