#im forever making jimin the friend guy smh im sorry bb bun

[joonsdiary]

worth fighting for (01)

pairing: jungkook x reader genre/warning: humour, fluff, angst / royalty au, historical au / tw: mentions of blood and wounds, mentions of war, battles, etc. word count: 4,467

summary: fresh out of the perils of war, jungkook didn’t think that his task as the newly appointed general would be to look after you.

                                                                           ONE.

Jungkook knows nothing else but the sound of clashing swords and the smell of putrid blood that would soon follow after. Every siege is important, his father would remind him, and so it means that he and his men have to be in perfect condition. Mistakes are not forgiven and often result in untimely deaths, and so it had been Jungkook’s task as the captain to make sure his men were always ready.

“Victory, and therefore freedom, is within our grasp. We cannot lose focus now,” the General lectures while looking intently at each captain in the eye. The candle flickers at the slight whisper of the winds and Jungkook squints in order to make out what kind of face the general is making. “We leave at dawn, no later than that or else we lose the element of surprise. You’re all dismissed.”

Everybody salutes and bows, including Jungkook, before they all file out of the makeshift tent one by one. They are all worn out and hardened by the battles they have fought, but the determination in their eyes tells a different story. Freedom is one hell of a motivation that will make anyone forget that they have been at this for months with no end seemingly in sight. Progress is key and the General makes sure that the men still have the means to fight and the willingness to survive despite the deaths of their comrades they often witnessed.

“Jungkook, a word,” he halts at the general’s words and turns to face him. He notices the general’s demeanour softens as he approaches him so Jungkook does the same, relaxing his shoulders. “About your brother, I…”

Jungkook tenses, the armour he’s wearing feeling heavy like the weight of a thousand burning suns. His mind reels to the memory of his brother’s bloodied face, expression blank yet it seems like he saw right through his soul the moment he locked his gaze into his eyes. Jungkook refuses to believe that the creature he saw that night was, in fact, his brother. It simply couldn’t be; his brother was always bright and full of energy, but serious when he needed to be. He had the ability to juggle personalities between friend and captain; everybody knew that they could talk to him about anything. Jungkook terribly misses his brother.

Tears threaten to fall but he merely blinks it away; he could not afford to look weak in front of the General, even if they are talking about his brother.

“I’ve already sent a letter to your mother. She won’t take it well, but she’ll be glad we still have you,” the general smiles woefully, a gesture that pierces right through Jungkook’s heart. He knows that his older brother was a much more skilled fighter than him, a much better swordsman, a much better leader, a much better son.

“I’m sorry father,” Jungkook whispers and looks down in disdain, “for not being able to protect him.”

“You fool,” his father admonishes before laughing in a way that makes Jungkook think it’s forced—a front he puts up in order to hide the disappointment and sadness that came with the heartbreak of losing one’s child. “Your brother fought with dignity, and I know he fought hard. You might not have been there at the moment of his untimely demise, but do not for one second think that it was your fault.”

“But—”

“You can not possibly hope to imagine that you’ll be able to save everyone’s lives, Jungkook. Your brother’s death, the deaths of the men you train to fight with you in the battlefield—we have to make sure they don’t go to waste.”

If there is one thing his father is good at, it is turning feelings of sorrow into motivation. Jungkook thinks this is one way he copes with the lives lost of the ones he cherishes; he has been in this far longer than Jungkook has, so surely, he has also lost more people than Jungkook could even begin to think.

His father clasps him on the shoulder before giving him a curt nod. Jungkook mimics him, determination steeled in his eyes.

//

Jungkook learns the hard way that the enemy always thinks five steps ahead, as evident by the ambush they currently find themselves in. Despite being told by his father, the General, that they would be the ones attacking out of nowhere, it seems that the enemy had anticipated all of it. He searches his mind for any idea on how to get out of the situation as he presses a clean cloth on the wounded man who cries out in pain.

“What are we going to do, captain?” someone crawls to him hurriedly, afraid that if he lifts even an inch of his body that he would be spotted and shot to death with an arrow.

“How many men do we have left?” he questions as calmly as he can, knotting the cloth into a makeshift bandage. The man beneath him murmurs a disgruntled thanks. Jungkook wipes the sweat trickling down between his brow and sighs deeply, waiting for even just one good news.

“Not enough to fight and come out of here alive, for sure,” Jungkook’s shoulder slumps even more as the young man drones on, rambling about the fact that perhaps he should have just been an apothecary instead of signing up for the war. Maybe then he would live long enough to see his children have their offspring.

“Look, I mean no disrespect,” Jungkook grabs the young man’s collar in frustration, his fists clenching in a way that makes it hard for the other to breathe. “But if you’re not going to come up with a solution to help us win this battle, then might I suggest that you shut the fuck up. Or leave. Let’s see if you don’t get shot by a blizzard of arrows the moment you come into their view.”

The young man nods and says nothing further. The winds howl dreadfully as Jungkook sighs, closing his eyes before leaning against the loamy trench they hurriedly dug in order to avoid the further onslaught.

“Have you sent the letter to request more men?” Jungkook asks optimistically but his hope falters when he sees the man grimace, so he prepares his mind for the worse.

“We did, but I don’t suggest relying on that since we aren’t sure it’s going to get there safely. We did send out two messengers just in case.”

He is right, Jungkook thinks; they have no time to depend on backup coming since they might all get killed if he doesn’t act now.

“How long has it been since they’ve stopped firing arrows at us?”

“Ever since the sun had set, captain.”

“That must mean they’re also getting tired,” Jungkook states the obvious and the man nods in agreement, unsure of where Jungkook is taking the conversation. “Your name’s Han, isn’t it?”

Han nods, bewildered that his captain remembers his name out of all the hundreds of soldiers under his wing. Given that he did cause a bit of trouble during their training, he likes to think that the particular incident is not the reason why he knows his name.

“Wasn’t it you that was convinced that one of the soldiers-in-training was a woman?” Jungkook musters a chuckle and Han mentally slaps himself, trying to laugh along with his captain despite being embarrassed about the memory.

“Definitely goes on my top three list of ‘Foolish Things Han Has Done’,” he declares awkwardly and Jungkook merely pats him on the shoulder.

“What are the other two?” Jungkook inquires but Han shakes his head, assuring his captain that it will just be a waste of time if he tells him. Jungkook agrees and shifts the mood, becoming serious once more. “We still have the pull-cart full of explosives exported from the West, no?”

Han pauses before nodding furiously, afraid to ask why he’s inquired of the explosives. They had been tasked by the general to only use it in dire times and to not waste them, but he guesses that now’s as good as any time.

“Go and gather our remaining men,” Jungkook instructs, “I have a plan.”

//

He doesn’t mean to brag, but Jungkook thought of himself as a genius. If all goes well and they come out of this peril alive, then he doesn’t mind being heralded as the country’s hero.

But that is all still an astronomical if, of course.

“We surrender!” Jungkook cries out, standing not too far from the trenches they were in previously. His hands are up in the air holding a white cloth, waving frantically in hopes that they see it and will not shoot their arrows at him. Other remaining soldiers stood with him, an air of defeat around them. Jungkook could not see from afar due to the lack of light so he trusts that their opponents would not misunderstand. If they did, then he would have surrendered for nothing.

“We don’t have enough men and what’s more, we are out of food! We cannot possibly survive no more than two days, so we’re surrendering in hopes that you’d take us as prisoners of war rather than face death.” Jungkook speaks confidently, not letting a wrinkle of nervousness or worry show; he knows that this is what he’s trained all his life for.

“How do we know you’re not up to some sort of jest?” A voice bellows from afar, asking a question Jungkook had expected them to inquire. He smirks but doesn’t let his excitement show. Even though the enemies are nowhere in sight, he knows better than to celebrate a victory too early.

“We’re sending you all of our arrows, swords…all of our weapons,” he motions at a horse-drawn wagon, which is dubiously covered with layers and layers of dark clothing. One of the soldiers pats the horse, signalling the animal that it should start running in the other direction.

“Are we sure that it’s going to where their explosives are? We can’t make a mistake about this,” Jungkook whispers to Han who stands idly beside him, slightly shivering while his hands are also up in the air. They both watch as the horse disappears from sight, masked by the morning fog that coated the entire area.

A shiver runs down Han’s spine as he answers his captain with a nod, “One of the men you patched up earlier said that he saw flashing lights from that area, so there’s a high chance.”

“In that case, signal for our men to take cover in 3, 2…”  

Han screams on top of his lungs and as soon as he does, the soldiers run for the trenches in sheer panic. It doesn’t take Jungkook’s body to react and he’s soon taking cover beside Han who is cowering in fear, visibly shaking as he covers his ears. It’s silent for a while and shivers run down Jungkook’s spine as he expects the worst.

“Captain, the explosives…it’s not going off,” Han breaks the silence with a loud whisper and Jungkook curses under his breath. This is supposed to be their only plan—if it turns out that the explosives didn’t work, he doesn’t have any other option left but to actually surrender to avoid getting killed. Still, Jungkook refuses to admit defeat.

“Impossible. I lit the damn thing myself—” Jungkook begins but he’s cut off by a loud bang, followed by the apparent shaking of the ground, as if the earth is splitting in two and is going to swallow all of them whole. Jungkook attempts to cover his ears at the last minute in hopes that he doesn’t break them by being so close to the blast. He doesn’t feel the heat of the explosion, but he could hear the wails of several men who are on the receiving end of it. Jungkook doesn’t mourn for the lives lost, since he still thinks about the same men who’d killed his brothers and hundreds of others who he’d seen die. He’d rather weep for the horse he had to sacrifice to get the explosive on the other side than to mourn the death of those who’d attacked their country, burned down their cities, ravaged their women and killed their children.

Debris flies out as another explosion hits, and Jungkook could hear some of his men cheering on what seems to be their victory, though he knows that some could have survived and been on their way to attack.

“Stay alert, men!” Jungkook shouts amidst the chaos and cheers. He peers from the trenches and sure enough, there are those staggering their way out of the line of fire, clutching the injured parts of their bodies. Others appear to have their skins burned off and yet they still look like they’re up for a fight, dragging their longswords while tracing various patterns on the dirt.

Jungkook picks up his weapon from the ground and jumps out of the trench once more. He no longer wants to fight, exhausted by days without sleep yet he convinced himself that this was the key to the end; their enemies have dwindled thanks to his ingenious plan and he knows they don’t have enough men to mount another attack. Therefore, they can take back the lands that have been stolen from them by force and by violence.

“For Hoseok,” he mumbles to himself before swinging his sword and taking aim at the enemy’s head.

* * *

You slowly tiptoe out of your room, the hem of your dress carefully bunched up and held around your thighs which would enable you to run fast, if need be. Your eyes carefully scan the long, dark hallways of the palace, which is surprisingly empty. It seems like your plan to get rid of the guards and distract the maids worked because they are all currently nowhere to be found. You quickly hurry along the wooden floors, not caring if the coldness of the floors makes your feet numb—wearing shoes that could let someone know you’re coming isn’t the best idea when sneaking out, so you have chosen to leave them behind your sleeping quarters.

It’s not like you are completely barred from leaving your room, that isn’t the case at all, but your desire to go horse riding in the middle of the night while the rest of the palace sleeps does not sit well with your chambermaids and other palace guards.

You have always been reminded by Miyoung, one of the chambermaids you are most familiar with, that the country had been fresh off fighting a war and enemies could still lurk beneath the shadows. You were defiant in stating that several moons had passed since your country has won, and there is no need to worry any further but she insists, not wanting to get in trouble with the King and Queen if they find out that you have snuck out once again.

That did not stop you, of course. Everyone in the palace is familiar with your strong-headed nature, your unbending will, and how stubborn you get when things don’t go your way. Yet no matter how much you begged Miyoung earlier during the day, she was unrelenting, stating that she fears the repercussions of the court lady rather than you, the actual princess.

You shudder at the thought of getting caught by the head court lady, Siyeon. You have been fortunate enough to not be on the receiving end of her lectures and punishments, but you’ve heard constant horror stories from your chambermaids and other ladies-in-waiting. She even had the gall to lecture your cousin when she visited a month ago—clearly, she did not care about one’s status when she knew they'd done something wrong.

Fortunately for you, there is a new stable boy that was easily tricked, so getting him to distract some of the household staff while you scamper out of your room was no sweat. You enjoy the thrill of running free along the dim corridors illuminated by the bright moon slipping past the tall windowpane. Though it’s dim, you prepare yourself for the turn coming up at the end of the long hall.

You are about to make a hard left when someone pulls you strongly by the arm, dragging you in the opposite direction you had intended to go. You yelp in surprise so the perpetrator’s hand clasps at your mouth in an attempt to silence your scream. A shiver ran down your spine as a long list of possible suspects runs through your mind. Despite being attacked and being in a precarious position, you know well enough that this is not how it’s going to end for you.

You are quick to react as you twist back the arm that was clutching your mouth, using that to flip the man on his back in one swift movement, not letting him react or defend himself. Your eyes widen in surprise when your eyes meet those of the terrified stable boy, clutching his head as he groans in displeasure.

“Oh by gods, Jimin, I’m so sorry. I thought—I thought…” you trail off, rushing over to help him up to his feet. The daffodil-haired boy assures you that he’s okay despite clearly being in pain.

“We can stop by in the kitchen to get some ice. I don’t think the palace physician is available at this hour,” you murmur as you brush imaginary lint off his shoulders, a gesture of remorse on your part. “I’m really sorry.”

“It’s my fault for sneaking up on you like that, Your Highness,” he grins in good nature but it doesn’t reassure you. “I saw some guards in that direction just now, so I don’t think it’s a good idea for you to sneak out that way.”

You follow his lead, trusting the judgement of someone who’s been working for your family for less than three months. The palace is almost labyrinth-like in layout but that didn’t matter to Jimin, who mentions that he is good at memorizing when you question how he knows his way around so quickly. You hold on to the hem of his white chemise in hopes of keeping up with his long strides but also to signal to him that it is becoming harder for you to walk barefoot. Jimin notices this and makes sure to fetch you a pair of casual slip-ons, that most likely belongs to a maid before you two make your way outside. You didn’t mind this due to how excited you feel being outdoors after the sun has set.

“It’s been a while,” you breathe in the late summer air, bringing your hands around yourself as you continue to follow Jimin to the stables. He looks back at you and smiles, eyes forming into the crescent shapes you’re only beginning to get used to.

“I’m also glad that things are slowly starting to get back to normal again. I was out there in the front-lines during the war and…” Jimin trails off, his gaze cast somewhere far away. You place your hand gently on his shoulder in an attempt to console him. The war had been over for a while but the effect it had on Jimin is still noticeable in the way his eyes gleamed with horror.

“You may not have been the one given the Medallion of Valour or promoted as part of the king’s guard for your service,” you regard Jimin seriously, “and this might not mean much since it’s coming from me and not the king himself, but I appreciate the service you’ve given for this country, and what you might have had to sacrifice because of it.”

Jimin’s cheeks begin to mimic the colour of rubies but not because of your words but rather he had noticed how close you had been to him this whole time. He tries, for the sake of being polite, to look you in the eyes rather than to watch the way your lips are moving.

“I personally would promote you to become the general instead,” you smile up to him, hoping that it’s enough to make him feel better, even though you know well enough that nothing could ever measure up to the horror of being in an actual battlefield, forced to watch the people around you die. Jimin blinks and clears his throat, laughing away the embarrassment he feels of having to be consoled by the princess herself.

“You spoil me with your sentiments too much, Your Highness,” Jimin smiles and continues the long trek to the stables, keeping you at a good distance while trying to be on the lookout in case you two get caught. “What Captain Jungkook, I mean, General Jeon has done for this country is insurmountable, surely he deserves it more than I do.”

You scoff at his words as you roll your eyes.

“That pompous prick? I’m sure he only got that because his father was the general.”

“You speak as if you two are well acquainted with each other,” Jimin muses and gives you a playful look, which you dismiss. “I’ve heard rumours—”

“Well that’s what they all are…baseless rumours,” you mumble, immediately cutting his words off before he could say something further. You quickly ran your fingers through your short, ebony locks and as you ignored Jimin’s mischievous glances.

“It’s been a while since I’ve paid the horses a visit,” you began, hopeful that it will steer Jimin’s attention away from speaking about Jungkook.

“They’ve terribly missed you, Your Grace,” Jimin says sarcastically and you punch his arm, threatening to flip over once again if he doesn’t quit with the teasing. He holds his hands up but doesn’t voice his defeat, opting to laugh instead as he leads you to where the horses are.

Excitement bubbles up your stomach as you run past several stables before arriving at your favourite one, a white mare with whom you’ve grown accustomed over the years. No matter how much everyone says that she’s a stubborn horse unable to be trained, you never give up on pouring all your attention to her and always making sure she’s well-groomed and fed. In fact, you had gotten in trouble recently with the Queen for bathing the horse yourself, telling you that there’s a reason why they hired people to look after them.

“She hasn’t been eating particularly well,” Jimin watches in awe as you brush the animal carefully.

“Has anyone taken her for a stroll yet?” You glance at Jimin for an answer and he shakes his head vehemently.

“She always makes a fuss when we try to take her outside, so we gave up trying overall,” Jimin sighs defeatedly and stands behind you before reaching for the mare, who turned him away. You giggle and soothe the horse who nuzzles your palm.

“You’re not so fond of Jimin, are you, Luna?” you ask and the horse neighs, which makes you double back in laughter.

“You see my dilemma?” Jimin whines, trying to reach for the horse’s nose but gets turned away every time.

Opening the stable door, you carefully guide Luna out of her confines which Jimin doesn’t exactly approve of.

“This is not what we talked about, Your Highness,” Jimin panics as you get on the horse without any saddle, swinging your leg over which makes your white chemise dress roll up, exposing your thighs. This doesn’t escape Jimin as he averts his gaze from your alluring posture.

“It’s just going to be a quick trip around the area. I promise you she’ll get back to eating properly after this,” you gently tap Luna with your heels and she starts trotting out of the barn. Jimin calls out for you, asking if he should come along. You shake your head and tell him to wait in the barn in case someone comes in to look for you. Jimin is left with no choice but to follow your instruction and stay behind.

“The king is going to get me beheaded,” Jimin mumbles to himself as he watches the horse take you far away into the night.

You gently grasp the rope around Luna as you gently ease her around the sparsely wooded area just behind the castle. You thank the heavens for the full moon as it brightens that path you navigate around without fearing that you were going to bump into something and fall off the horse. Though you didn’t mind if it did happen, because there would be no ladies-in-waiting or palace guards to witness your misfortune.

As your thoughts of freedom run wild, Luna leads you both to a small clearing, making a beeline for the pond located in the middle of the secluded area which is hidden by trees around it. You signal for her to stop before you carefully get off, guiding her towards the water. It takes a few words of encouragement before she has the initiative to sip water, and it’s not long after that she’s continuously drinking, quenching the thirst she’s seemed to have built up. You gently brush her beck and her tail waggles as she moves back to munch on the grass at the edge of the pond.

“Finally,” you whisper into the air as you sigh with relief while watching Luna feast on the foliage. “I was probably a stable master in my previous life—or a horse whisperer.”

You chuckle to yourself at your joke, regretful that no one is present to bear witness to how miraculous it is that you managed to feed Luna without much protest from her. In your mind Jimin would make a fuss, stating that being a stable master does not equate to being a horse whisperer if such things are real in the first place.

The sounds of the night do not terrify you, but your ears do perk up when you hear the rustling of leaves and you turn your attention away from Luna momentarily. Your brows furrowed in confusion when you see that no one else is present, and conclude that it might just be the wind.

“You do know that I could kill you right here, right now if I wanted to, and no one would know. All it would take is one fling of an arrow.”

A voice greets from behind you and you feel the hairs on your skin stand upright, either due to fear or from the coldness—or possibly both. The tension in the air thickens and you find it harder to breathe every second as your heart hammers wildly against your chest, feeling foolish for not letting Jimin tag along. The intentions of the stranger are made clear when they begin to make their way towards you, grass squelching beneath their boots.

You hold your breath, too terrified to turn around.

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