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gladerwolfstarkimagines · 4 years ago

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Azula x female reader series: Part 6

Azula learns details about your relationship with Zuko and is furious leaving you isolated in a dangerous situation with few allies. You learn Zuko’s plan to escape during the eclipse and are torn between telling Azula or escaping with Zuko. Azula feels betrayed and no longer trusts you but do you give up on her that easily?

Tag list: @saucy-sapphic @justastranger-passing @azulasprincess @888-rising @sighsam @theblueslytherin @lucyrocks86 @halcyon-arts

Part One here

Part Two here

Part Three here

Part Four here

Part Five here

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Your POV

"So that was a good effort" Zuko said breaking the awkward silence that settled as soon as you walked into his room. You managed not to roll your eyes as you moved about the room readying it for the night. Your training sessions were usually okay but today you'd done particularly bad and you were feeling hopeless you'd ever get better. "Seriously" Zuko said offering you a small smile "you're a new bender it will take time". Your practice sessions had been numerous, Zuko was suprisingly enthusiastic about training you but you hadn't been showing much improvement. He tried teaching you how his uncle taught him but the technique wasn’t compatible with you or something because you’d barely been able to match any of his stances. "Maybe I’m just not that good" you shrugged "you and Azula are royals it makes sense you’re such strong fire benders". Zuko went quiet at the mention of Azula and you scolded yourself for bringing her up, you weren’t meant to do that but you were seeing her tonight so she was on your mind. "Yes well..' Zuko started when there was a knock at the door. "Dammit I was supposed to meet Mai a while ago" Zuko frowned "y/n hide". "What?" You asked confused. "Things with Mai have been difficult lately" Zuko said awkwardly "she’s still not happy you’re my maid and if she sees you she’ll know we’ve been training and it will make her mad, so can you hide?". You nodded ignoring the blush on Zuko’s cheeks and looked for a spot. "Under the bed?" Zuko offered and you frowned "why don’t you just tell her what happened? We were training and lost track of time, maybe if you tell her the truth she won’t be mad". Zuko was thinking it over in his head when she knocked again and he jumped. "She won’t understand so please just hide y/n, I’ll tell her I’m coming soon and get her to leave". You sighed but nodded and rolled under the bed. Zuko sighed with relief and turned the door handle "I'm so sorry Ma..." he started but he stopped abruptly and you heard a voice that was certainly not Mai's. "I dont know what youre apologising for but im sure it's justified”.

Azula's POV

Azula loved catching her brother off guard and it seemed she had done just that. She waited until she was sure you'd have left the training room and came to Zuko's room. Azula wasn’t really sure why she was here, she hadn’t arranged this with you and it wasn’t that she didn’t trust you or anything. She just wanted proof nothing was going on, to see you two together in a non formal setting and see for herself what your relationship with her brother was like. Azula walked into the room amused Zuko looked so angry. She looked around for you but noticed you weren’t here, she imagined you were hiding and that sparked doubt in her mind. If Zuko was hiding you from Mai he must have a reason....

"Azula what do you want I'm late to meet Mai". Azula smirked turning to face him "she's already angry at you zuzu I doubt being late can make matters much worse between you, I don’t think anything can really". Zuko turned red in anger and embarrassment and Azula continued "how was your training session by the way? You’ve been having a lot of them lately haven’t you?". "None of your buisness" Zuko snapped "now get out". "My my not in a good mood" Azula replied "I’m only here for y/n". "Y/n?" Zuko asked and Azula nodded "yeah you know your maid..that's her name". "I know who she is!" Zuko snapped "but what do you want with her?". Azula smirked but she noticed another thing she didn’t like, the suspicion and anger Zuko showed at the mention of your name. "None of your buisness" Azula mimicked Zuko "have you seen her or not? I was sure she'd be here for some reason...seems she's been spending a lot of time with you according to the servants, I’m glad you've made a friend Zuko but if she works for you does it really count?". "You’re one to talk" Zuko spat and Azula frowned confused "I am?". "The way you've treated y/n, is it no wonder she likes me better?". Ow that hit a sensitive spot. What did he mean? Azula wondered. How dare he insinuate you liked him more. It wasn’t true and Azula knew that but it still made her nervous. "and how have I treated the maid brother?" Azula asked her temper already growing. "She told me all of it" zuko explained "how you blackmailed her to be loyal to you! How you lied and manipulated her, used whatever emotions she had for you for your own gain, how she never did any of it because she wanted to but because you made her! Honestly you're a monster". It wasn’t the first time Azula had been called a monster but it was the first time in relation to you so it stung. "And i’m supposed to believe y/n trusted you enough to confess this all?" Azula asked. Zuko nodded "i promised her i’d keep her safe from you and she confessed it all, everything I said came from her lips directly, she hates you Azula but she’s not scared of you anymore, because you can’t touch her now, she’s my maid and you can’t boss her around anymore". Azula was so shocked it took her a while to think of a witty response. You'd really told Zuko all of that about her? Did you really feel that way? How could you say it to Zuko of all people? All Azula wanted to do was run away but she couldn’t, she spun to Zuko and decided to let her anger out on him. "You think she’s untouachble? Nobody is" Azula spat "I am the best fire bender this nation has seen in aeons, you know i can beat you zuzu, speak to me like that again and I’ll give you a scar to match the one father did!". Zuko grunted and lunged for her but Azula was ready, lightning danced on her hands and she aimed. Zuko ducked and it hit his wall instead narrowly missing him. Zuko stared as the spot he’d just been stood on now smoked and Azula smiled satisfied. "Next time I won’t miss" and slammed the door.

Your POV

You made your way down the coridoor still shocked from the events in Zuko’s room. You couldn’t believe the horrible things Zuko had said but for Azula to fire lighning at him. She could have killed Zuko, murdered her brother over an argument. You reminded yourself she missed on purpose, she would never actually kill Zuko...not over something so petty as this anyway. Azula surely didn’t really believe you meant all the things you’d told Zuko, she surely knew it was all for the mission she’s assigned you and understood. You pushed open the door to your room and saw Azula stood there. The look she gave you told you, you’d been wrong. Azula turned to face you her face showing anger as she looked at you. It intimidated you and weeks ago you’d have been terrified but this was Azula, your Azula. You could reason with her and explain everything. She’s listen to you.

Azula’s POV

Azula felt she’d been very understanding. She’d allowed the private training sessions, she understood letting Zuko teach you fire bending and she hadn’t even got angry when you’d accidentally shown Zuko your abilities. What Azula couldn’t get over however was you creating this bad relationship for Zuko’s benefit. Azula watched as you stepped into the room and waited to see if you’d speak first. She was suprised you looked her straight in the eye as you went to speak “Azula I know you’re angry...”. “Of course I’m angry” Azula burst “how long have you been telling Zuko horrible stories about me”. “Well since the day he found out I was a firebender but they were all lies Azula”. “They’re not lies to Zuko, he thinks they’re true...you must’ve been pretty convincing, maybe they weren’t all lies”. “Of course they were Azula! I just made him think i disliked you so he’d trust me, he wouldn’t trust me any other way” you argued. “You couldn’t think of any other way besides bad mouthing me to my worst enemy? To someone I’ve despised since being a child?” Azula asked. “You wanted me to get close to Zuko” you cried “you asked me to do this and so I did, it’s clearly worked”. “No, I seem to recall telling you I could find another way y/n, that I’d use another plan, after your...slip up. I didn’t ask you to carry this on, you carried it on y/n and this is the way you chose to do it”.

The worst part was Azula could actually see the logic to your plan. Zuko hadn’t thought fondly of Azula since she’d learnt to walk, it was instinct for him to blame and hate her, to believe she was a cruel person. And yes Azula had been rude and cruel to many servants so the story would been easily believed but she had been nice to you, nicer than she was to her own friends! She’d protected you, trusted you and even grown to care for you more than she ever had for anyone else. You didn’t need rescuing from her, least of all by zuko but that was the story you’d sold him. As everyone did, even your mind made Azula the villan and Zuko the hero. Azula was snapped out of her rumination when you spoke. "Azula..." you tried again "please I was just doing it for the mission, I didn’t want to have ruined your plan, I wanted to salvage it by any means necessary, it’s working really well but I will stop if you want me to, I won’t keep up this act with Zuko anymore". “I think it’s a bit late for that” Azula snapped “you’ve already convinced Zuko I’m a monster to you and you’ve convinced me that what you really think of me”. “But Azula..” you tried but she cut you off aware she had to end this conversation now while she had control over her emotions. “No” she said raising her voice “the deal is off”. As Azula said those words she felt them hang in the air and saw your face change as you registered what she was saying. “I no longer want you to try and learn Zuko’s secrets, I don’t want you to report back to me, I don’t want to see or hear from you again” she yelled.

Your POV

Azula’s voice rang in the air and you stared at her. You felt scared, shock and sad but mainly angry. Azula had been fine with complicating your job by making you a spy, by making you lose the respect of your colleagues, by making the royals all despise you as a servant girl trying to sleep her way to the top and was only annoyed when Zuko believed a lie about her. "But it’s not true" you cried "Azula you know that! I know that! Who cares what zuko thinks? You’re throwing all this away because of him?". “This is not about Zuko y/n this is about you and I no longer trust or want to be around you”. Azula turned to leave and your anger turned to desperation. "Azula you don’t have to do this" you said reaching for her but she spun around brushing your hand away "who are you to tell me what i have or don’t have to do? I am the princess of the biggest kingdom in the world and you are a mere servant! You don’t speak to me that way ever!". You lowered your eyes and tried not to show how upset her words left you. A mere servant? How many times had Azula told you that you were more than that? And now she was pulling that all away, she was leaving you with Zuko in the middle of a web you’d spun on her orders, you’d manipulated Zuko and almost ruined his relationship on her orders and now she was abandoning you to it. Again as always Azula seemed to read your mind “have fun with zu zu y/n, he’s all you have left” and she stormed from the room.

1 week later

Your POV

"The room is prepared Prince Zuko" you declared. Zuko looked around shocked, you hadn’t been working long but it was true you’d done all he’d asked. He looked around for another job for you to do to make you stay but couldn’t spot any. You been cold and distant as of late and Zuko didn’t like it. "Is there anything else you require?" You asked. Zuko shook his head "no that is fine y/n" and you nodded going for the door. "Wait" Zuko called as your hand touched the door handle. Your shoulders slumped but you turned around passively "yes?". "Y/n are you okay?" Zuko asked. You wanted to scream that question seemed so stupid. Instead you just nodded your head "yes Prince Zuko". You were itching for him to leave you alone but Zuko wasn’t giving up that easy. "No you’re not" he replied. You shrugged not having the energy to argue and Zuko sighed "is it Azula?". You wanted to tell anyone it hurt so much but instead you met his eyes and calmly shook your head "no". Zuko frowned but you didn’t look away from his stare and he sighed "so what is it? You cancelled our training sessions for a reason! And i’ve noticed you’ve been sad y/n, I do notice other people besides myself you know!". You swallowed scared to comment and Zuko frowned again "is it the rumours about us?”. Again you were unsure how to comment, you didn’t want to encourage him or at the same time offend him, he was your employer and the only friend you had left now. "Rumours?" You asked playing dumb and Zuko rolled his eyes "i know you’re aware of them I think everyone is, they all think my interest in you is physical and unprofessional, is that why you’ve distanced yourself from me? If so y/n yo don’t have to I can stop the rumours and we can go back to training". "It’s not about you" you burst before you could stop yourself "I’m not worried my colleagues all despise me or think bad things about me, I dont care the nobels all think I am seducing you for power, I don’t care what they whisper about us as we pass" you burst. You wanted to add the most important one, that you didn’t care Azula didn’t like you anymore but knew that was a lie. Zuko stared at you shocked and you realised you’d just shouted at the heir to the throne and your only ally. "Prince Zuko i’m so sorry..." you started but he cut you off. "No it’s okay I pushed you it’s I who should apologise...but we are friends y/n you can tell me these things". You nodded your head “thank you” but made no move to carry on talking. "You are not happy" Zuko said thoughtfully and he turned to face you. You shrugged in response not seeing the point in denying it anymore. “what if i told you I could help get you away from this? From here?" Zuko asked. You looked at him shocked but truthfully you’d been expecting to be dismissed now Azula didn’t want you here but still it hurt. Regardless you handled it with composure and nodded "where will you resassign me?". "Reassign you?" Zuko asked surpised "y/n i don’t want to send you away!". "You don’t? Then what would you do?" you asked frowning. Zuko paused looking around to make sure his door was closed and lowered his voice “I’m planning on leaving soon and I could take you with me if you wanted". You paused shocked at this statement "you’re deserting the fire nation?” Zuko flushed "well i wouldn’t call it that but yes i guess i am but I never should’ve come back here, it was a mistake, I have to get out of here". "And you’d take me with you?" You asked "why?". Zuko paused "well we know the rumours aren’t true but my family doesn't, if I disappear they will interrogate all those close to me and they’ll turn to you, when I think of what they’ll do to get answers from you, my father alone will...." zuko trailed off before shaking his head "I don’t want to leave you behind to deal with the consequences of my actions, I could sneak you out with me...you could get away from this all if you came with me...what do you think?" Zuko asked. “This is a very kind offer Zuko” you frowned. “But...?” he asked sensing you weren’t totally on board with this plan. Leaving with Zuko would get you out of your situation but something was stopping you. Azula. If you left that would be it for your chances of reconciling what you had with her, you would prove to her she was right and you’d be another person who chose Zuko over her. You’d ruin all you’d had and maybe even Azula. You sighed and looked at Zuko "can i think about it?". Zuko nodded "of course, think it over but don’t take too long y/n the escape is in 2 days".

Azula’s POV

The day of the eclipse was fast approaching and the whole palace was busy finalising plans. Azula too was rushed off her feet ensuring the barracks were sufficient and she’d liked to have said it distracted her from what happened but it only put it off. Azula could go all day without thinking about it or wondering what was happening right now between you and Zuko but as soon as the silence settled or the planning was done it all came back. She’d hear your voice as you told her you didn’t mean it, how you tried to explain your actions away by blaming them on her. It still made her angry. She heard Zuko’s voice as he told her all you’d said and his promise to keep you safe from him. Azula would give up trying to sleep as the voices got too loud and go back to planning whatever she had left to plan. She double checked, triple checked everything but still she found an excuse to keep her mind from thinking but there were some ocassions she couldn’t help. Azula entered the dining room expecting to see her father and Zuko but saw Mai and Ty Lee instead. To be fair Zuko had been avoiding Azula so she didn’t expect him to be here but she thought her father would want to see her before the move to the barracks. “Where’s my father?” Azula barked and Mai shrugged but Ty Lee tried to smile “we’re not sure but we we’re summonded here instead. Nobody else has shown up so guess this is all ours” Ty Lee smiled looking at the food. Azula grunted but took a seat, she had nowhere else to be, she hadn’t realised how much time she’s spent with you until she cut you out of her life. “We were just talking about the move tomorrow” Ty Lee explained although Azula hadn’t asked “I was saying how I’m jealous Mai’s family got such a good spot! Then again I guess it’s understandable, Zuko probably put a good word in” Ty Lee said making Mai smile slightly. Azula had heard things had improved with Zuko and Mai, she guessed now you were no longer making things difficult Zuko had been forgiven and it was like it had never happened. That made Azula angry, she had lost her plan, her favourite maid, her only confidant, her well...whatever you two had been to one another all because of Zuko and he was happy while Azula was alone and miserable as always. Well not if she could help it, Azula was guessing Zuko hadn’t told Mai everything....

“Yes I’ve heard Zuko’s been keeping his favourites close to his chest lately”. Ty Lee shot Azula a wary look but Mai narrowed her eyes “what does that mean?”. “Ow nothing” Azula smirked “I mean you and Zuko have moved passed that whole buisness I’d hate to drag things back up...”. “Tell me” Mai snapped and when Azula raised an eyebrow she sighed “please”. Azula smirked “well it’s nothing really just that night you and Zuko went to go watch the ember island players and he was late...well he was with the maid. I went to his room to tell him father needed to speak with him and he thought I was you, he had her hid under the bed so you wouldn’t see her. He was late for your date because he was busy with another woman”. Mai slammed her cutlery down and stood up so suddenly the table shook. She threw her chair back and strode out of the room. Azula grinned watching and Ty Lee frowned at her. “Did you have to do that?” Ty Lee asked. “I think she should know my brothers cheating on her, would you rather I lie to her like he’s doing?”. “No but you didn’t have to tell her like that” Ty Lee sighed “it was just mean” and she stood up going after Mai. Azula brushed of Ty Lee’s comment, everyone thought she was mean, evil, a monster so why shouldn’t she act like one? Azula savoured her win over Zuko and smirked thinking about what Mai would do to him but the happiness was short lived. Azula looked around the now empty room and felt the familair pang of loneliness she’s felt growing since she’d dismissed you. It just seemed to be getting worse and if ruining Zuko’s happiness couldn’t even get rid of it could anything? She swallowed hard and stood up, she should get back to work.

Your POV

“Those boxes need going to Prince Zuko’s private room in the baracks” you told the servants who had come to help you move Zuko’s belongings to the bunkers for safety during the eclipse. It was all for show really, Zuko was planning on leaving during the eclipse so wouldn’t really need a room in the baracks but you had to pretend he’d be there the whole time. You’d organised all his possessions and managed to save the few he would need on him when he made his escape without arousing suspicion. You still hadn’t decided if to stay or go and time was running out to put it off any longer. The servants all got to work helping you automatically but none of them would look at you. You knew most were scared of you, they figured you had Zuko’s ear and they weren’t wrong you supposed but it was in a different way than they thought. You picked up a stack of boxes too, determined to show them all you weren’t just Zuko’s accesory and led the way to the barracks. You hadn’t gone far down the coridoor when someone came around the corner. Mai and Ty Lee appeared and they seemed to be arguing or atleast Mai was, she was walking ahead as Ty Lee tried to keep up and seemed angry. You hoped they wouldn’t look up and almost made it past them when Mai’s eyes fixed on you you felt your heart stop. “Stop” she called and all the servants halted. Ty Lee was saying something to her, sje seemed to be begging her not do this but Mai didn’t seem to be listening. She looked at the boxes you were carrying clearly marked as Zuko’s things and that seemed to make her angrier. You always found the girl terrifying but now she looked plain evil. The look she sent you told you she wanted you dead, no worse than dead. “Leave us” she spat at the servants. They were all too happy to leave and rushed off, even plucking the boxes from your hands as they passed leaving you very much on your own. You instantly feared what Mai was going to do to you. You thought her and Zuko had made up since you’d distanced yourself from him but apparently Mai wasn’t ready to move on. Ty lee watched Mai stare at you and frowned “Mai don’t...". Ty Lee go" Mai said her voice flat "i wish to speak to the servant alone". Ty Lee looked at Mai but sighed seeing Mai’s eyes were fixed on you unmoving. Ty Lee looked upset but obediently turned and walked back the way she’d come. Mai stared at you and then moved forwards soundlessly and you instinctively went to step back. “Does Zuko often hide you in his room everytime I visit or just when he’s already an hour late to our date?” Mai asked. You paused confused why Mai was bringing this up now, that night was ages ago why was she angry about it now? Mai didn’t seem to care what you had to say though and carried “do either of you think you’re fooling anyone? Do you think the rumours of the two of you haven’t reach us all? That we don’t know you’re together?”. You stared at Mai not wanting to move, breath or do anything to anger her any more. "Do you deny it?" she asked stepping closer again and you backed up into the wall. You looked at her helplessly, what could you say? You couldn’t tell her you were just training with Zuko, she’s definitely tell Ozai to have you thrown out of her life for good. "You should speak to Prince Zuko" you told her shakily "I don’t know what I’m allowed to say". Mai gripped you so suddenly you would’ve flinched but her grip didn’t permit it. She had a hand of your throat and the other on a knife you hadn’t even seen her draw. "Not allowed" she spat "acting now like you’re someone who follows all the rules! What being Azula’s pet wasn’t enough to make you feel special you had to have Zuko too? Bet you brag to all your little servant friends, think you’re going to secure your place here through Zuko and some bastard child?". You shook your head "no Mai! That’s not what I want!". Mai only hissed slightly pressing on your neck harder "I should kill you both for the insult to me!". "Mai it’s not what you think" you couldn’t help saying "please talk to Zuko!". "Zuko?" she spat "you dare be so casual about him to me!". You paled more "no Mai i’m sorry, I just meant...". "I always had my doubts, i knew you couldn’t be trusted, i knew Azula did this on purpose, I bet she told you to do this didn’t she? You think you have no choice but we all have choices y/n and you made yours". Mai raised her knife and you closed your eyes ready for her to kill you. Seconds passed and nothing happened. You opened your eyes to see Mai staring at you hard, her face unreadable. You could barely breathe, she was deciding what to do with your life. Finally she let go and you collapsed back against the wall gasping. You looked up at Mai shocked and saw her fist just as it came down and punched you straight in the face. You cried out and fell down against the wall as blood trickled down your face. Mai straightenned looking at you with disgust "you can tell Zuko i gave you that, if he thinks i’ll allow him to keep doing this to me with you he’s wrong, tell him we’re done, I think it should come from you" she said with a twitch of her lip "also tell Zuko to make sure I don’t ever see you again, if I do I won’t be so forgiving, you’ve both been warned" she spat before she turned and left. You breathed haggerdly your heart pounding as you pressed your sleeve to your nose. You were terrified of Mai but also couldn’t help feel sorry for her. If Zuko had just trusted her with your secret or found a less provocative cover none of this would’ve happneed. Now you had an assassin ready to kill you the next time she saw you and your only escape was with Azula’s brother. The bleeding stopped and you stood up slowly. You either stayed and got killed or left with Zuko abandoning Azula here. You wiped away the blood and carried on walking. If you were going to be killed by staying here for Azula you’d atleast do what she hired you to do.

It was early in the morning and you moved through the palace taking back routes so nobody would see you. You didn’t want what you were about to do getting back to Zuko. You went to knock on the door to Azula’s room when it suddenly opened. You’d been prepared to see Azula but still after not seeing her for a week you felt your heart speed up in anticipation but it wasn’t Azula behind the door. “Ow” Ty Lee frowned seeing you and you stared at her. Azula never entertained her friends in her own room and especially not at this time in the morning. You got suspicious and jealous as your mind worked overtime to work out why Ty Lee was there in Azula’s room at this time of day but you couldn’t think of a plausible solution. “Can I help you?” Ty Lee asked and you heard Azula ask who she was talking to. Azula appeared beside Ty Lee and stopped midsentence when she saw it was you “ow”. Shaking away your jealousy you remembered why you’d come here "I need to speak to Princess Azula" you spoke clearly and slowly. Ty Lee looked to Azula whose face was a mask. "Well i'd love to chat about laundry or mopping floors but I’m busy" Azula said going to shut the door. "Please" you said forcefully meeting Azula’s eye "it’s important”. Azula’s face changed as she met your eye and you saw her nervously look to Ty Lee as if making sure her friend wasn’t getting suspicious there had been any sort of relationship between you. "Go" Azula told Ty Lee "I’ll just see what this is about?". Ty Lee nodded “Okay” and Azula watched until she was gone and turned to you.

Azula’s POV

"Well I suppose you should come inside" Azula snapped "I won’t do this is the hallway, what were you thinking coming to be so publically?" She scolded you as the door shut behind you. "I had to" you said annoyed "it’s urgent". Azula rolled her eyes "what’s so urgent?". Azula had been expecting an attempt to get back together or confession of how much you’d missed her. Instead it was nothing about her. "I know what Zuko’s planning". Azula paused unsure if she’d heard you correctly "what?". "I know what Zuko’s planning" you repeated. So she hadn’t imagined that, you’d actually said what she'd dreamt of you saying for ages. Well true more recently she dreamt more of you giving a grand apology that justified forgiving you but that wasn’t going to happen. "Well what is it?" Azula asked as silence settled and you frowned at her. Azula was aware she'd been the one to pause but she hadn’t seen you in a while and you seemed annoyingly fine. Sure you hadn’t looked at her when you first spoke but you’d practically demnded to speak with her, even infront of Ty Lee too. You’d grown confident and Azula could even tell now by how you snapped back at her or only just caught your eye rolls, you weren’t afraid of her anymore. That both annoyed and pleased her. Caught up in her thoughts Azula almost missed what you’d said. "Zuko’s escaping?" she repeated "tomorrow?". You nodded your head "during the eclipse, that’s what he’s been planning". Azula noticed you looked guilty and her jealousy rose again "so why tell me and betray your precious Zuko?" Azula asked aware she sounded childish but she didn’t care. You actually did roll your eyes this time "I know you don’t believe I didn’t mean the things I said to Zuko but i didn’t Azula, I did all of this to get you this information and well it seemed pointless to not tell you so here i am". Silence settled and Azula felt miffed, your answer hadn’t been what she expected at all. "Well if that is all you can go" Azula said coldly turning away. You fixed your eyes on her in disbelief and Azula felt a mixture of anger and guilt. How dare you look at her like she was the bad guy here. She had told you to drop this and didn’t owe you anything. But as you turned to leave Azula got a sinking feeling, this felt final...you’d said this was happening in 24 hours, that was so soon. Why had you told her? Azula knew her brother, he wouldn’t leave you behind. No he’d take you with him and yet you still told her. Was it just because of loyalty to her or had you wanted to see her? To prove you were on her side? Azula frowned, if she told her father Zuko would be imprisoned or killed and you would be dragged down with him, especially when she was forced to reveal where she got this information from. Azula was still angry and confused at you but she didn’t want to be the cause of your death. She couldn’t be even if it did mean bringing down her brother...could she?.

Your POV

The talk with Azula hadn't cleared anything up for you it just made you feel guilty for betraying zuko. You been split by your loyalty to both of them but your feelings for Azula won you over and all for nothing. Azula hadn't responded how you'd wanted her to and now Zuko was going to suffer for your lapse in judgement. You decided you were going to tell him, apologise and maybe convince him to leave early while he still could and so has been waiting in his room for him to return all morning. You were unpacking the last of his belongings while you waited when the door suddenly opened. "Zuko we need to talk" you started but stopped dead in your tracks to see Azula stood there. “Azula? what are you doing here?”. "Well i heard Mai’s got a bounty out for your head so figured you'd be hiding out in here". You paused but realised she hadn't really answered your question “That still doesn’t tell me why you’re here”. Azula huffed at your tone but carried on “I don’t have long the war meeting starts soon so just let me talk”. You pouted but nodded for Azula to go on. “This escape plan?” Azula asked “the one taking place tomorrow, my brother has extended the invitation to you hasn’t he?”. You paused and Azula nodded “I knew it”. “He has” you tried to explain “but i...” but Azula wasn’t listening. “I am not bothered about Zuko being here or not” Azula explained “I will do you this one thing y/n, I will not tell my father about Zuko’s plan to give you the chance to escape, but as soon as you are out of here I will have to hunt down my brother". "Azula" you tried to explain but she cut you off "no just listen, i will have to do that y/n whether i want to or not so my advice to you is to escape and get away from him, leave Zuko as soon as you can and head for the colonies, you can get away there and be safe I won't follow you there”. “Azula” you said annoyed but she carried on “of course you'll need to find work and money to survive, you could steal some of Zuko’s possessions to help start you off, or even ask him for them I’m sure he won’t mind and use the money to build a life in the colonies...”. “Azula” you yelled and she stopped looking at you clearly annoyed “what?”. "I’m not going with Zuko" you told her and she frowned. "Well why not?" She asked exasperatedly and you sighed "I’m not leaving with zuko, I can’t, not after all I’ve done to him” you sighed and saw Azula roll her eyes. “And I know you think that's stupid” you said noticing her expression “but Zuko isn’t as bad as I thought he’d be and don’t take that personally Azula just because I don't hate Zuko doesn’t mean I dislike you”. Azula pouted and you shook your head ”I feel gulity for what I did to him but that’s not the main reason I’m not leaving” You told Azula “I’ve lied and manipulated Zuko and yes i feel bad for doing it but I did all that for you because you needed me to do it and well I’d pretty much do anything for you". Azula paused taken back and unsure how to respond just blurted "so why does that mean you can't leave?". You smirked slightly at Azula's blunt response and smiled "because if I leave I‘ll be leaving you here alone, and i know you don’t trust me or even like me but I don’t want to do that Azula, I won’t leave you here alone, I promised you I’d be here for you Azula and so there’s no way I’m leaving you, I won’t, not even if you command me to".

Azula’s POV

Azula was taken back by your confession and all the emotions it made her feel. She felt scared, vulnerable, angry at you for not saying it sooner, suspicious, confused why you still felt this for her but mainly she felt hopeful. What you said made her excited, it made her feel warm and happy, something she hadn’t felt since she'd parted from you. She felt safe. Azula stared at you softly and you paused "so yeah...you don’t have to reply but i just wanted you to know that". You looked down and turned away “you should go, the meeting will have started now”. Azula reacted too slowly and when she went to call your name tell you not to leave you’d already gone. Azula moved to follow you but the door behind her opened and her father appeared "Azula?" Ozai asked "what are you doing in here? Are you ready for the meeting?". She nodded although her eyes kept flickering to the door you'd just walk out of and she itched to follow you. "Azula!" her father snapped and reluctantly Azula followed him.

All through the meeting Azula couldn’t concentrate, all she could think about was what you said and how much that meant to her. And more importantly how she couldn't let anything happen to you. As soon as the meeting was over Azula grabbed zuko "i need to talk to you". He glared at her pulling his arm away and it took everything in her body not to just yank his arm and force him to speak to her. "please" she said through gritted teeth and Zuko raised his eyebrows but followed her out of pure shock. As soon as he shut the door Azula started to talk. "You have to take y/n with you" Azula told Zuko and he paused eyes wide "what?"."When you leave tomorrow" she explained. "How do you..." zuko started but Azula cut him off "it doesn't matter, what matters is I know y/n doesn’t want to go but you have to make her! By any means possible". Zuko glared "I’m not forcing her to do anything Azula". Azula sighed angrily he didn't understand. "Zuko if you disappear and she stays do you have any idea what will happen to her? Can your small brain even comprehend what father will do to get information out of her?". "I know that" Zuko snapped and Azula glared "so what's the problem?" She snapped back "she doesn't leave with you then she gets hurt! Or worse! You think your life is worth more than hers! That you can run away and be happy knowing you did that to her?". "No..." zuko frowned and Azula nodded "then make her leave with you! Get her out of the palace and away from here, you have to! Scare her, pay her, guilt her! I don't care what it is just save her!". Zuko stared at Azula shocked to see his sister so desperate. In all his life he'd never seen her so scared, so worried about someone who wasn't herself. "You care about her?" Zuko said shocked "like really care for her". Azula rolled her eyes annoyed it had taken her family this long to notice "just do as i say Zuko, if she get's hurt because of you i'll...". "Got it" Zuko nodded "I'll try and get her to safety Azula I promise". Azula nodded her head suprised she was once pleased with Zuko and grateful for him. "Good" she nodded "i guess it's a good thing I didn't kill you when we were kids". Zuko frowned "thanks?". "You're welcome" Azula nodded before walking away.

Your POV

Zuko knew you wanted to speak to him by the way you kept fiddling with the sleeve of your uniform. Zuko had grown suspicious of you since his meeting with Azula and figured he’d just start the ball rolling. "You told Azula about our escape plan didn't you?" Zuko asked and you froze. Guilt overcame you and you spun around "Zuko I’m so sorry". Zuko nodded his head in recognition but wouldn’t look at you "I suppose it’s okay, she's not going to stop us so it hasn’t changed anything...". "I know but i feel so bad, I could’ve got you caught or worse by telling her, i don’t know what I was expecting to happen when I told her...I don’t know what I wanted from it" you sighed but zuko frowned. "I think i know why you did it, i think Azula does too...I never realised you were...you're close aren’t you?". You sighed but nodded "I mean I thought we were but I’m not so sure anymore". "That’s why you don't want to leave isn’t it?" Zuko asked "you don’t want to leave her". You were terrified to admit it but also it felt so good just to confess your feelings. "Yes, I can't leave her Zuko, i know you don’t like her but she's not like you think she is...I can't leave her behind to deal with this this all alone". Zuko frowned "well she actually asked me to get you out of here". "She asked you that?" You said suprised Azula went to Zuko for help of all people! Zuko nodded "I’ve never seen her care for anyone before but she was certain I had to get you to leave with me, I think she’s scared of what will happen to you once im gone and I am too y/n". You were grateful and touched Azula and Zuko both cared about you so much but it didn't change your mind. "I can't Zuko" you sighed firmly "I guess Azula won’t be happy but I haven’t changed my decision I can’t leave her behind I...I just can’t". Zuko nodded "I understand, well I don’t but I won’t force you". You smiled sadly "thank you for helping me though I never thought i’d grow to count you as a friend but I did, I just hope i haven’t ruined everything". Zuko shook his head "I don’t like what you did but i get it...you did it for Azula because of how much you like her". You blushed but nodded "still it doesn’t excuse what i did and I’m sorry". Zuko smiled softly and placed a hand on your arm "you're forgiven y/n".

The escape had gone fairly smoothly. You wanted to see Zuko off so waited by the airships for him when sure enough he appeared out of breath and shaken but he looked fine. “It went okay with your father?” you asked noticing the smell of burning on him. “As well as I expected” Zuko nodded as you passsed him his supplies and the keys to the airship. Zuko took them from you and paused “You still won’t come with me?” Zuko asked and you shook your head smiling sadly “no”. “You know what they’ll do to you?” Zuko warned you “are you sure you’re willing to accept that?”. You nodded your head “just hurry up and overthrow your father”. Zuko smiled but it was a sad smile and he sighed “y/n...”. “Go” you said hearing the sounds of someone approaching “now!”. Zuko nodded and turned to the airship when Azula appeared. “Honestly I ask one thing of you and you even fail at that” Azula snapped. Zuko looked just as suprised as you that Azula was here. “Azula why are you here?” Zuko asked as if unsure if she was here to help or stop him from leaving. “I came to make sure you got y/n to go with you but as usual you failed”. I won’t force her” Zuko glared “unlike you I don’t just ignore what my friends want”. Azula rolled her eyes “this isn’t a difference in opinion Zuko this is her life you’re letting her throw away” Azula snapped and you stepped inbetween them. “Azula stop, you can’t blame Zuko for this it’s my decision”. Azula finally looked at you and her expression confused you because she genuinely looked scared, something you’d never seen on her face before. “But it’s a stupid decision, do you know what my father will do to you? What I wont be able to stop?”. “I know” you nodded and Azula groaned “so go!” she yelled “run now! disappear! I won’t blame you y/n you have my blessing to do this”. “Sweet as that is I don’t care” you replied. Azula glared at you “you’re going even if I have to put you on the ship myself!”. Zuko watched amazed as you stepped towards Azula and she didn’t back away or push you back. "I told you i’m not leaving" you told her "there no way you’ll get me on that ship atleast not without you". Azula shook her head, you couldn't be serious. "Y/n you have to leave because you’re in danger i’m not" she told you “please go”. Azula stared at you willing you to say yes but you couldn’t. You gently touched her arm and lowered you tone “Azula you know that’s not true, you’re not safe here none of you are”. "You don’t know what youre talking about" Azula glared and you frowned feeling her tense. “Azula your father burned Zuko for speaking out of turn as a child! He’s neglected you emotionally since you were an infant! He sent you out alone across the world to capture the avatar and pitted you and Zuko against one another just because he could! He uses you because you’re valuable not because he values you, you are in danger here Azula just like me and that’s why I’m not going anywhere unless you’re with me". “That’s ridiculous” Azula muttered “my father would never harm me...Zuko was wrong to do what he did...I won’t make a mistake like that ever”. You smiled sadly “you don’t know that Azula and if you do how would your father react?”. Azula flinched away from you and turned so her back was to you “no I can’t”. Azula walked away from you and stood cradling her arms, the sight almost broke you but you had to do this, you were so close. “Azula” you said softly and she shook her head “stop it y/n”. “Azula please come with me”. She didn’t reply so you walked closer "Even if you think you’re safe here you’re not happy here Azula" you told her "i know you’re not, and that’s not fair Azula”. Azula looked at you and you could see there were tears in her eyes. “I know you’re scared and so am I” you nodded “this life is all we know but it isn’t all thats out there Azula, there’s more for you...for both of us besides this” you said gesturing to the palace “you deserve better than this Azula, you deserve to be happy and loved and appreciated and if we leave we can find all that, we can have all that! All you need to do is come with me" you said standing inches away from here. “Please Azula come with me” you begged hand outstreteched. The silence stretched out and the tension was thick in the air. You held your breath waiting for Azula’s reply, not even contemplating what it would mean if she said no. You lowered your eyes figuring Azula didn’t want to come with you when she moved so quickly it made you jump. Azula grabbed your hand and nodded softly her eyes fixed on you “Let’s go”.

Epilogue

You, Azula and Zuko fled the firenation and helped Zuko find the avatar as he planned. From there though you seperated from Zuko. Azula was still torn by her decision to abandon the life she’s knew and joining the rebels didn’t help her process that decision so together you left. You followed Azula’s plan of traveling to the fire nation colonies. It was a rough journey but together you avoided detection and made it to a quiet village where you could lay low. The news from the war was continuous and not easy for Azula to hear. She was struggling to come to terms with what she had done, she’d always planned every inch of her life but now she was without a plan, without a role, without a clear path. Azula considered going back numerous times, not because she missed her father or felt guilty for what she’d done but because she couldn’t see how she could just be Azula and not the firenation princess or a prodogy bender. But each time the thought of leaving you stopped her and you helped her adjust the best you could, reassuring her it was going to be okay and it would all work out. Once the war was won you didn’t have to hide away and Zuko helped you aquire the help Azula needed. Azula started trying to work on herself and you helped her unpack all her unconscious beliefs and traumas. It was hard work and there were many arguments and bad days but you were there for every breakdown, every outburst, every insecurity and you worked through them together. You never wanted Azula to feel alone ever again. As the months passed azula adjusted more to the idea of just being herself, not a weapon, not a firebending prodogy, not an opponent to her brother, just Azula. And you helped her see being just Azula was good enough, brilliant actually.

10 years later

You sat down in your garden on the bench you'd made a few years ago and smiled. The summer was coming to an end and while it was still warm it was a more relaxed heat you could happily enjoy. You closed your eyes feeling the sun on your face and enjoyed the smells of your garden when you felt someone sit next to you. Azula eased into the bench beside you and rested her arm around the back of your chair as she always did. You smiled placing your hand on her knee out of habit and looked at her. "We've been living here for 10 years now but the view still gets me on days like this" Azula smiled "it’s beautiful". You nodded just watching Azula and admired how content she looked. Azula was still the same strong willed confident woman but she was different now. She was no longer terrified of not being good enough, no longer chasing approval or using manipulation and anger as her weapons. Azula felt your gaze and looked over at you "what?". "Nothing" you smiled lowering your eyes. You both knew you'd been caught admiring her. Azula smirked and rested her head against yours "moments like this feel perfect" Azula smiled "and they only happened because of you". You shook your head "not just me, you chose to come with me, you made that leap not me". "Well yes but I did it for you mostly" Azula shrugged "so it was...inspired by you?" Azula asked and you smiled. "Fine I’ll accept that" you rolled your eyes making Azula grin. "Thank you" Azula said softly watching the turtle ducks in your pond "I don't think I say it enough". "You don't need to thank me" you smiled "I did it for you and being here seeing you be happy and grow as a person...that’s all the thanks I need". Azula blushed, something you still found adorable after all this time, and smiled "well still thank you, you saved me and made me the person i am i'll never forget that...ever" she told you holding your face. You blushed too and Azula smirked. She leant in to kiss you when your gate screeched and you heard a small voice. "Aunt azula! Aunt y/n were here!" Izumi yelled and Azula grinned. "About time!" Azula called "did you dad get lost again?" she asked scooping Izumi up into her arms making her laugh. "Yeah" Izumi giggled "mom’s angry he wouldn’t ask for directions just because he’s the firelord". You chuckled and waved to Zuko and Mai who were in sight at the bottom of the path. "Did you miss me?" Izumi asked and you smiled resting an arm on Azula's back "of course we did" you grinned "our favourite niece". "I'm your only niece" Izumi smirked jumping from Azula to you and you laughed "true but you're still our favourite" and tickled her. Izumi laughed and Azula smiled at the two of you. Izumi ran off to her parents and Azula followed. You stood watching your family and smiled as Azula and Zuko greeted each other warmly and Azula hugged mai like the old friend she was. The sun caught Azula’s face as she laughed at a joke Mai made and her eyes glowed as they had years ago when you'd first started dating. You smiled just seeing her smile and felt the familiar warm happy feeling in your chest. You were both safe, happy and together, still in love after all these years and you couldn’t picture it any other way, your life with Azula was perfect.

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So that’s it!!! Sorry it was suppppper long I just had so much to write about Azula! I know the ending might be a bit optimistic or idealistic for Azula but I want Azula to be happy and loved so don’t really care. Plus with help support and therapy I think Azula could totally live a healthy happy life and overcome all her past trauma so wrote that. Thanks for all the likes and support!! I’ve really enjoyed this series and it’s been great to see so many Azula fans are out there. Thanks again!!

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lveclouds · 5 years ago

Text

a/n: yet another got7 drabble!! this is going to be a bit angsty, so i apologize in advance and honestly this banner is probably one of my favorites hehe and also this drabble took me a while to type up but it was worth it! and this is very much unedited so if you see any grammatical errors then that’s on me lmao

genre: fluff, angst, college/university au, friends to lovers

rating: pg (for mild swearing)

warnings: light swearing, mild angst,a bit cheesy/cliche (jinyoung’s a huge dork in this hehe think wmylb jinyoung, but like a much tamer and softer version. wmylb jinyoung is uh, very passionate in voicing his opinions, and we love that, its just not fitting for the image that i have for him in this drabble)

pairing: literature major jinyoung x arts major reader

word count: 2.3k

you stared at the glowing laptop screen in front of you, eyes struggling to stay open, lashes fluttering, sleep threatening to take over. you couldn’t help but let out a small yawn, forcing yourself to keep your eyes open. the hardest exam of your life, and one that would have a major effect on your grade, was less than a week away, and you had barely looked at any of the review material. you had been so caught up in finishing your arts project and focusing on raising your grade that the anatomy exam had slipped your mind. and now, here you were, at three o clock in the morning, fighting sleep, trying to cram in information. you couldn’t believe you had been so foolish and careless. anatomy had always been a subject that you struggled in, and because you were stubborn and didn’t want people to think you were pathetic or lazy, you refused your professor’s suggestion to enlist the help of a tutor. you were so confident and sure that you could improve on your own, and well, you had never felt so idiotic in your life.

despite looking over the review material and pouring over pages of the dictionary sized textbook you had to lug around nearly every day, not a single ounce of information seemed to be sticking. the last few days had been spent relentlessly studying countless websites, books, review material, and just about anything that could potentially help you. you were beginning to get a bit stressed out, but you supposed that all of this was because of you. after all, you were the one who had decided to neglect studying for an exam all to work on some stupid art project instead. “just a day in the life.” you mumbled, eyes focusing on the laptop screen in front of you, the blue light illuminating the darkness of your dorm, casting dark shadows onto the white carpeted floor.

sighing, you shut your laptop closed and flopped back onto your bed in defeat, head softly hitting your pillow. there was no use in fighting sleep, after all, you could barely focus and dawn was drawing near, and soon you would have to trek across campus at exactly six a.m. for your early morning history lecture. sleep soon took over and all thoughts of studying and the exam faded away as you drifted off into dreamland.

the next morning, you awoke to a soft knock on your door. groaning, you reluctantly got out of bed and went to answer it. to your surprise, it was jinyoung, dressed in an oversized white turtleneck, dark jeans, and loafers, holding two cups of warm coffee and a light blue paper bag. his soft black hair was adorably rumpled, and despite it being five a.m., jinyoung still looked as gorgeous as ever, which you envied. “oh, hi jinyoung. what are you doing here?” you asked, rubbing the sleep from your eyes. “well, i figured you were up late last night again and i dropped by the cafe down the street, and i thought i’d just come by and give you some coffee. hopefully it’ll give you some energy. oh, and i brought some sandwiches that my roommate made last night. trust me, it’s not poisonous. jaebeom hyung’s a lot of things, and one of them is the ability to make a great sandwich.” you chuckled as he handed over your cup of coffee and the paper bag. “thanks for the coffee and the food. i’ll see you later?” “i-i was wondering if you wanted to walk to class together? “i’d love to. oh, please come inside. it’s a bit messy, so don’t mind all the clutter. i haven’t had time to clean lately.” jinyoung shook his head. “it’s fine. jaebeom hyung’s the same. he doesn’t have time to clean because he’s always so busy with writing music and classes, so i do all the cleaning in the dorm.” you gestured for jinyoung to sit on the couch, to make himself feel comfortable, and then disappeared into your room to take a quick shower and put on a decent outfit.

as you and jinyoung walked across campus, he told you all about the song that jaebeom was working on for the upcoming showcase that your university put on every month. “wait, so he composes his own songs?” jinyoung nodded. “he does, its pretty impressive, if i’m being honest. he’s been writing songs ever since he could walk. jaebeom hyung wants to become a singer one day.” “ i wouldn’t be surprised if he does, he’s really talented.” you had seen jaebeom peforrm a few times, and his voice was smooth and angelic and unique, and you had no doubt that he would get recognized for his singing one day. “so, what’s been going on with you? haven’t seen you in a while.” “ah, well, my professors are bombarding me with assignments and i have an essay due next week, but it’s tolerable, i guess. been trying to take a breather every now and then, get my shit together, the usual. anwyays, enough about me, how have you been doing?”

you grimaced. “well, i haven’t been getting much sleep lately. i kinda got too preoccupied in finishing an art project that i forgot all the about the anatomy exam i’m supposed to take, and it may or may not be less than a week away. so, i’ve been cramming.” jinyoung sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration. “are you kdiding me, y/n?” you laughed nervously. “uh, oops?” jinyoung shook his head, letting out a defeated sigh. “how long has this been going on for?” “u-uh a f-few days?” you looked away, not wanting to see the frustrated and worried expression on jinyoung’s face, fighting back tears. ever since you had met jinyoung on a particular sunny day last summer, the two of you had gone through a lot together, from comforting each other after breakups to taking care of each other when one of you was drunk. you hated making jinyoung worry, as he had enough to deal with, and you didn’t want to burden him. “why didn’t you tell me you were having a hard time?” he asked, and you forced yourself to look at him, instantly regretting it. his gorgeous brown eyes were filled with concern and a worried frown was set upon his perfect lips, and you immediately felt as if you had been stabbed in the gut. “i-im sorry,i just didn’t want to be a burden.” you mumbled, trying to hold back tears. before you knew it, you were engulfed in a hug, strong arms wrapping around you, holding you tight. you felt jinyoung rub comforting circles on your back, and that alone was enough for you to break down, crying into the soft fabric of his sweater. all the pent up stress you had been holding in was finally let out, and jinyoung just held you, not uttering a single word, listening to your soft sobs. after your tears had subsided, you pulled away, wiping your eyes with the back of your hand, sniffling. “s-sorry about your sweater.” jinyoung waved away your apology. “don’t worry about it, i’m not gonna freeze to death just because you got tears on it.”

“anyways, i’m sorry for not telling you.” “it’s ok, but y/n, please know that i’m always here for you and that you’re never a burden.” you felt your heart ache at how sincere he sounded, and despite his reassurances, you still felt extremely guilty for keeping your feelings locked away.

“i’m a phonecall or a text away, remember that. i’m always here for you, you know that, right?” you nodded. “thank you, jinyoung.” “no need to thank me, y/n.”

after class, you were feeling a bit better, as you had finally sought help from your classmates on the upcoming exam, and they had given you an overwhelming amount of notes, all of which were extremely detailed and well-written. and, as you were walking towards your dorm, you heard a familiar voice call out to you. turning, you saw im jaebeom, music major and jinyoung’s roommate, running towards you, a white envelope in his hand. “hey, you’re y/n, right?” he asked once he caught up to you, a bit breathless. “yeah, why?” jaebeom seemed to brighten at this, eyes turning into crescents as he smiled, gently placing the envelope in your hand. “jinyoung wanted me to give this to you. he’s in the library, working on an essay if you want to see him.” before you could say anything, jaebeom gave you a small wave before walking off to the other side of campus, leaving you speechless. what just happened? you thought as you opened the envelope, careful not to rip it. inside was a delicate piece of paper, with jinyoung’s familiar looping script written all over it.

“dear y/n, ever since we met, i’ve always thought you were bright. for example, your smile. your smile practically lights up your face and makes my heartbeat a little faster. i’m aware this is quite cheesy, but its true. ever since we met, you have been the brightest person in my world, and the one girl who has managed to break down these walls i’ve kept around me for so long. before i met you, i didn’t know what love was, or rather, why people bothered with it. but, that all changed when i laid eyes on you. you were the most stunning girl i had ever seen, let alone meet, and when you said”hi, my name’s y/n”, i felt my world turn upside down, but, in a good way. you were the person who showed me that it’s ok to love. you also showed me how beautiful love can be. it doesn’t have to be destructive or painful or terrifying. love can be exciting and thrilling and life-changing. even though i’m a literature major and have written more essays than i can count, i seem to struggle with words whenever i’m around you, thus why i’m putting my feelings on paper. i like you, a lot. i’ve liked you ever since you bumped into me on that fateful day, you were the one who has managed to sweep me off my feet, quite literally, i might add, and though i am awkward and clumsy and not as mysterious and alluring as jaebeom hyung, i do have some worth. anyways, please meet me in the library after you read this, and if you don’t, then i know that you don’t feel the same. it’s ok if you don’t, but i just wanted to get this off my chest.

sincerely,

park jinyoung

you felt tears prick the back of your eyes as you practically ran to the library, your heart aching. you didn’t know jinyoung felt that way about you, and you were so happy that he felt the same. you had liked him since the beginning, and you had fallen in love with his smile and all of his quirks. jinyoung was easily one of the most attractive guys on campus, with perfect eyebrows, a cute nose, perfectly sculpted cheekbones, gorgeous brown eyes, and one ot the prettiest smiles you had ever seen. his smile was stunning and never failed to take your breath away, eyes crinkling at the corners,perfect white teeth on display. his laugh was endearing and a sound that you would never get tired of hearing. on top of all that, he had a heart of gold, and was unfailingly kind and polite towards anyone, and also very selfless and humble.

as soon as you arrived in the library, you looked around for jinyoung, and immediately spotted him at a table near the back, typing on his laptop, eyebrows furrowed in concentration. you rushed over to him, heart beating wildly in your chest, and cleared your throat, causing him to look up from his laptop in surprise. “y/n?” he asked, practically scrambling off the chair he’d been sitting on, gently grabbing ahold of your wrist. “what’s wrong? did something happen?” you took a deep breath and grabbed ahold of his sweater, the fabric bunching up in your hands, pulling him towards you and kissing him. you felt him jump a bit in surprise, but he quickly reciprocated the kiss, wrapping his arms around you. the kiss was short and sweet, but you enjoyed every minute of it. when you pulled away, a faint shade of pink had settled across jinyoung’s face. “i-i never knew you were so bold, y/n.” he teased, the corners of his eyes crinkling as he smiled. “i didn’t either, but i had to do it before i chickened out.” “so, does that mean you like me?” you fought the urge to roll your eyes. “yes, of course, jinyoung. i don’t just go up to random guys on campus and kiss them you know.” “i-i just wanted to make sure.” “ah, you’re so cute, jinyoung.” “s-shut up. i’m not cute.” “hmm, yes you are.” “anyways, will you be my girlfriend, then?” “well, considering that i just kissed the hell out of you in the middle of a library, i think it’d be foolish if we weren’t dating after that, so yes, yes i will.”

a/n: hehe jinyoung drabble done!! i hope you all enjoyed this lengthy drabble!! i have two more got7 drabbles to write/post and then i will go back to my planned bts ones :) again, this drabble is dedicated to cara, aka @yongcherie one of my favorite humans ever (sends kisses and hugs) ily angel 💞💞and this is also dedicated to my sister issy aka @taeramisu bc i love her and she’s the one of the loveliest angels ever💖

#mine #not bts #got7

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missmentelle · 5 years ago

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This might sound very silly but I just don't know how to be more proactive. I've been very passive all this years until this point where I feel like I can't anymore. I wish I could be more hardworking for the things I want but I get all overwhelmed and don't even know how other people have the energy or the motivation. People think Im just lazy. I don't have almost any skills let alone any that I can monetize, I feel like Im going to be a looser forever.

I think this is a problem that a lot of people - especially younger people - are struggling with right now. We want to achieve great things, and we feel like we should be achieving great things, but many of us are so paralyzed by doubt/anxiety/apathy/uncertainty that we have a hard time mustering up the motivation to run basic errands, let alone chase our dreams. I’ve certainly spent more than my fair share of time beating myself up for the countless days that I’ve fucked around on Reddit all day instead of actually achieving anything, even when I was fully aware that I was sabotaging my own dreams and goals by doing so. I just couldn’t always muster up the ability to care about the things I needed to be doing, even if there were dire consequences for not doing them. The good news is, there are definitely ways to overcome this issue, and reach a point where you are happier with your progress and your life. To get started, I recommend:

Decide what it is you actually want. Telling yourself to “be more proactive”, “work harder” or “have a better life” is not helpful if you don’t actually have specific goals that you’re working towards. It is very, very easy to find ways to be “busy” for 8 hours per day - but being busy doesn’t necessarily mean progress. Take some time, and think about some rough goals that you’d like to actually work towards. Don’t worry about how much work or effort it would be to achieve those goals, just start thinking about what you want in life, and what’s the most important to you. Think about the kind of life that you would like to have someday, and start figuring out the steps you need to take in order to get yourself from your current life to the life that you envision. It’s okay if those things are very far apart - the point is not for you to get overwhelmed, but for you to have something to be proactive about.

Start slowly. You cannot go from “spending 8 hours per day mindlessly browsing the internet amidst a pile of old take-out containers” to “running 5 miles every morning before making art for 8 hours in a spotless apartment with a fridge full of vegetables” overnight. Trying to change your routine too drastically and too quickly will lead to you burning out in a couple of days and going right back to your old ways, with an added dose of self-hatred because you tried and failed. Trying to be more productive and more functional is a process, and a long one at that. It’s not at all unusual or abnormal to take several years of work before you get your life to where you want it to be. Start slow. Start with incredibly tiny changes, and slowly build up those changes over time. If you currently live on a diet of fast food and candy, and you want to be a shredded, clean-eating fitness guru, you can’t rush into that all at once. Start by swapping out full-sugar pop for diet pop for the first month, and trying to drink more water. That’s it. Don’t make any other changes. Then the second month, switch out diet pop for flavored water. And so on. Change only sticks when it’s gradual.

Focus on one thing at a time. Again, trying to do too much, too soon is a recipe for fast burnout and self-hatred. Start by trying to change one area of your life, and one area of your life alone. Once you feel like you have a pretty solid handle on that part of your life and you have established some new habits, then you can add on a second area of focus. Spend some time, and really think about which area of your life is the most important for you to change, and which area of focus will improve your life the most. If it helps, envision your problems as rocks that you are carrying around in a backpack with you at all times. What’s the heaviest rock in your backpack? If you are overweight, unhappily single, making no progress building your YouTube channel and failing out of college, then your college grades are probably the thing causing you the most stress in your life, and they’re your most urgent concern - focus on that, and give yourself permission to let the rest of it sit on the back burner until you have boosted your GPA. Only then will you be ready to start changing something else.

Go easy on yourself. I think one of the pitfalls that many young people face these days is that they absolutely crush themselves with unrealistic expectations of what they “should” be doing with their lives; it’s hard to get up the motivation to do anything when you’ve convinced yourself that the bare minimum for success is an impossible ideal. I have friends with master’s degrees who still consider themselves failures that haven’t done anything in life. Remember that you are not a machine. Even at your most successful and high-functional, you will not be perfect and productive 100% of the time. You will still have lazy days where you don’t get much done. You will still occasionally order takeout instead of making a home-cooked meal. You will still occasionally procrastinate. Don’t set yourself up for failure by comparing yourself to an unattainable ideal - just aim to be a slightly better version of what you are right now.

Get used to tracking, even without making changes. It’s hard to set goals for improvement if you don’t have a solid idea of what you’re actually doing right now. Telling yourself things like “stop being so lazy and do more things” is setting yourself up for a spiral of self-loathing if you don’t actually track what you’re doing, because you won’t be able to see the small, gradual progress that you’re making. Being able to actually see yourself taking baby steps toward your goal is important for keeping you motivated, and keeping you from beating yourself up. Don’t track absolutely everything in your life - that becomes obsessive after a while - but keep an eye on some of the major things that you might want to change in the future. Install apps on your phone and laptop that track how much time you spend doing what. Set up the step tracker on your phone. If you want to eat better in the future, start tracking roughly what you eat now. I’m a pretty avid bullet journaler, I track a lot of my daily habits. Keeping track of the things you do, even if you’re not proud of them, and even before you start to work on them, gives you a baseline to work with, so you can establish how bad the problem is and see when you’re heading in the right direction.

Forget the obsession with monetizing. A lot of us have gotten this idea in our heads that we need to find ways to monetize everything that we’re even remotely good at, or doing that thing is somehow a waste of our time. I don’t want to generalize about millennials and gen z too much, but I do feel like our generation was raised on the belief that “doing what you love” is the most important thing in life; I personally have many friends that are obsessed with monetizing, to the point that they no longer do anything unless they can find some way to funnel it into advancing their blogger/influencer/creator career. I think this is a mistake. When you monetize something that you love doing, you turn it from a hobby into a job, with all the stress that comes with that, and I think it’s important for everyone to have at least one thing in their life that they do just for the joy of it. It’s okay to let work be work, and play just be play. And I say this as a person who has monetized one of my hobbies; I love true crime and forensic psychology, and I co-host a true crime podcast that has recently had a huge surge of popularity and is on the cusp of being monetized. I could write an entire post about the mental health side of being a creator with a public online presence, but in a nutshell, turning my podcast from a hobby into a business has required me to take it a lot more seriously, and it now falls more into the category of “work” than it does “fun”. My enjoyment of life requires that some of my other hobbies - like playing music - just stay un-monetized hobbies. Let yourself create and do things that don’t have economic value.

Don’t compare yourself to what you see on social media. I have had both personal friends and followers on this blog tell me that they feel bad about themselves because their life doesn’t measure up to what they see on Instagram, or because they feel that their own lives would not be worthy of posting online. This is a toxic mindset to get into. The things you see on social media are not reality, no matter how much they appear to be - people put incredible amounts of effort into carefully cultivating an online persona that makes them look more productive and accomplished than they actually are. I have a brother who who is a somewhat successful Instagram “influencer”, alongside his more successful girlfriend, and I could write an entire post about the lengths they go to to fake having perfect lives on Instagram, and the toll that their Insta careers are having on their mental health. If you are looking to be a more productive version of yourself, it’s best to steer clear of “motivation” from people who are paid to pretend to be successful online.

Set measurable, achievable goals. Goals like “be healthier” and “do more stuff” won’t get you anywhere - they are so vague that it’s not possible to tell when you’ve actually achieved them, or how much progress you’ve made. If you want to be more productive and feel like you’re getting more done, you need to set goals that can actually be worked towards and checked off when they are done. Instead of “go to the gym more”, aim for “go to the gym 5 days per week” as your end goal, and start with a solid couple of months with “go to the gym at least once per week”, and slowly increase from there. If you’re aiming for something big like “have an awesome job”, break that down into medium-sized goals like “finish an undergrad degree”, and then break that goal down even further into “hand in all my assignments on time this semester”, and break that down further into “write the first 10 pages of my paper by the end of the week”. Set tiny goals for yourself that you can easily achieve, and that will gradually accumulate into big accomplishments.

Remember that slow progress is better than no progress. If you write one sentence per day, it is going to take you a really long time to write a novel. It will take you a whole lot less time, however, than if you get overwhelmed at the thought of writing a novel and never write at all. Sometimes you need to break goals down into steps so small that they also seem not worth doing. It can feel a little silly to congratulate yourself for things like “brushed my teeth today” and “texted someone back today”, but those are little habits that add up into bigger things, and giving yourself that positive reinforcement is important. “Greatness” and “success” are not things you achieve all at once, they are made up of tiny habits that you’ve been working on for months or years at a time.

Take care of your mental health. Not feeling the motivation to do anything, even things that you enjoy, can be a symptom of depression. Everyone beats themselves up from time to time for not being more productive, but if your brain is constantly on a feedback loop of “I’m human garbage and I’m wasting my life”, that’s a pretty serious problem, and a solid sign that it’s time to seek out some professional help. Trying to make major life improvements without addressing underlying mental health concerns is kind of like trying to drive a car without wheels - you’re just not going to get anywhere until you’ve dealt with the obvious problem.

Remember that setbacks are okay. Even the most highly proactive and high-functioning people have days where they say “fuck it” and order takeout to eat in front of the TV. Everyone occasionally misses deadlines or leaves things to the last minute when they shouldn’t. Everyone shows up late occasionally. These things happen - we are humans, and none of us are perfect. The key to long-term proactivity and productivity, though, is not to let those small setbacks define you, and not to throw away all the progress you’ve made over a bad day or a bad week. Eating healthy six days per week will put you in a much better position than deciding “fuck it, I blew it” after one bad meal and returning to eating unhealthy meals 7 days per week. As the saying goes, don’t let perfect be the enemy of good - in other words, perfection is not attainable, and getting hung up on being perfect will prevent you from achieving many things that are good. The idea is not to be perfect; it’s just to keep striving to be a slightly better version of yourself.

Best of luck to you!

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vampexx · 5 years ago

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I have tried a few times now to write this post but I just couldnt go forward with posting it, thinking its too personal...

But...here it goes...

I have always been a painfully shy, paranoid and self conscious person so being this open is really scary for me to say the least due to my struggles with confidence and self esteem...

And drawing has been something I did for as long as I can remember...and it was something that helped me growing up...

However, ever since high school in 10th grade, I have had almost all my drive and love for drawing drained from me from comparing myself to the other, "better," students in my art class and from my own art teacher who at first, in 9th grade, started as a somewhat positive influence but then the next year being really negative and rude.

I was the student that was told, "youre not done, go back to your seat, keep working," when going to my teacher for advice. When he said this, he would only glance at my work before turning me away. All while the other students received kind, positive and constructive criticism when I did not.

He even addressed me, out loud, in front of the class, regarding my low grade, saying, "the only reason you arent failing my class is because you did your homework last night."

For context: the homework assignment was some drawing exercises...and the reason my grade was low was because, it was towards the end of the year, I had completely given up on myself and my art so I didnt turn in a project. One, because I never cared enough to finish it and two, it was an act of rebellion on my part.

That was the first and only class where I actually had an F-....I didnt even know it was possible to get that low of a grade...but trust me, it is. My math grade was never even that low.

Now, this art class was something you had to submit a portfolio for it to be reviewed so these 2 art teachers could decide if you were accepted into this art program or not. (It was exoensive too, if I remember correctly, it was like $200 per semester, and I did this for 2 years).

And against my own self consciousness, while feeling like I was far less qualified than others, I challenged my self doubt and fear of rejection and tried out anyways...

And a few weeks later, I found out I was accepted. That moment went down as one my top, most proud moments. I was proud of myself for a change.

Only for that to change a couple years later...where the little pride and confidence I had left in not only myself, but my skills in art, just dropped so low.

On top of that, my academic grades while in this art program, were also dropping considerably due to the amount of stress I put myself through trying to meet everyone elses expectations and standards.

My painting and drawing teacher (the nice one, not the rude one) would encourage my love and skill for cartooning, charcoal and shading. My digital art teacher (the one who ended up being so rude to me in the following year), helped me realize my strengths in photoshop and with a tablet. He did praise me a few times, which did help, but it didnt last very long.

My downfall was the art class that I took in 10th grade, with my previous digital art teacher, which was "figure drawing." Basically, it was learning how to draw anatomy and being anatomically correct which I found out very early on, was not my strength....and it was the whole focus of the class for the entire year so I was screwed. My strengths were cartooning and caricatures, not anywhere near anything anatomically correct. I kean, I could draw a skeleton, but when it came to human figures and poses....I dont know why but I had a tough time. So that was the year that things really went downhill fast.

It just took the fun out of drawing and turned it into something that felt too forced.

However, in my experience with this class I learned something about myself that Im actually glad that I did...

Its that art is just a hobby for me. I learned that I hate drawing on demand, in a certain time frame, and drawing what someone else wants me to draw.

I want to draw only on my own terms and at my own pace.

I couldnt see that about myself because I was too concerned with everyone else and their skills in drawing.

A few years after I quit the art program, I really didnt draw all that much aside from little doodles and unfinished sketches on the edges of my homework and class notes. I didnt like anything that I drew anymore.

And when you lose love, drive and interest in something you were once so passionate about....it leaves a gaping hole in you. It makes you feel pointless, like there nothing special about you. Nothing that sets you apart from everyone else. It really is as depressing as it sounds.

I was lost.

However. I FELT FREE. I didnt have a constant reminder from several different people that I wasnt as good. No one to make me feel lesser than someone else. No one to put me down.

As a result, my academic grades improved back to As and Bs (excluding math in the 11th grade, I had like a D).

---

And I realize now that maybe I didnt learn all of this the hard way for no reason. Maybe its to also help someone so they dont have to learn the hard way like I did. Or maybe, its to reach out to those have experienced the same or similar things as me so that they dont feel alone. So that they know that them and their skills are still very much valuable and valid.

Because everyone goes at their own pace, no two people are ever the same.

Anyone can be good at anything.

Now I didnt want this post to discourage anyone from taking or considering an art class. Please understand that my experiences are unique to myself. Art classes are actually very helpful as long as your surrounded by positive and encouraging influences.

Just remember to be careful. Respect yourself and your abilities. Be patient with yourself. Have faith in yourself, dont give up. And last, but not least, know your worth and what you deserve when it comes to treatment.

---

Anyways, so up until a couple of years ago, I slowly started to get back into drawing.

I do love to draw, along with architecture and interior/ fashion design.

Im working to rediscover myself, even though I dont want to do it professionally...

So as I did years ago, I will challenge my self doubt again and try to put myself back out there.

So as anxietal as I am, I want to ask...

Would anyone be interested in seeing something I drew?

Might be an odd question and it might sound attention seeking but Im really just testing the waters....

I will add one little doodle I did the other day just to see....

I know its not that great and thats its nothing amazing but....its something Im proud of...however small it may be.

Im not sure how I feel when it comes to reposting...

I feel like I dont want people to repost it...

In case I ever feel like taking it down...

Idk.

Anyways....Im literally shaking Im so nervous...

But...Im trying to repair some old damage.

Have a miraculous day and thank you for your patience.

Again, please dont repost. At least until Im a little more comfortable.

Thank you

#vampexx #vampexx draws

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savefrog · 5 years ago

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Anyway, here's my belated take on the Pokedex situation. As preface I have a degree in game design lol

Adding 100+ new Pokemon every major installment is not a sustainable practice. It's tragic but true

I don't think it's impossible to have a game with all the Pokemon in it, the previous games have managed.

However there's a thing called Scope. The bigger the scope, the less time is being spent on perfecting smaller details. This is partially the reason why I think a lot of indie games have outshined AAA games. Bigger scope means more art/concept/animation/programming/design, obviously...but also more testing (and testing doesn't JUST happen at the end of development, that would be a mess)...more things that need to wait for feedback from higher ups...more time spent on communication and figuring out what gets in and what gets cut...more chance for time-consuming errors...etc etc

The previous games had all the Pokemon, sure, but take a look at the meta game. While I think Game Freak does a great job giving overlooked older Pokemon fun hidden abilities and new moves, we're at a point in the meta where there's a tier (ZU) for Pokemon too useless for even the lowest tier (PU). They are just simply outclassed - there's another Pokemon out there that does the exact same thing mechanically that they do...JUST BETTER. They're redundant. And this happens even in the lowest tiers.

While a lot of people don't care about that and battle with their fave Pokemon regardless of whether or not they are good, it's not exactly prime game design. And I don't blame Game Freak, how the hell do you test and consider almost 1000 seperate Pokemon??? The overwatch team still struggles to balance their cast with 31 (ok, they're not entirely comparable but you get it)

Focusing the scope on a smaller cast of Pokemon would mean that more time and attention can be put into balancing them and making sure they all have a place mechanically. Making even the less popular Pokemon have a role!

And besides mechanics, we now have Pokemon camp to interact with these Pokemon face to face, something that'd be less feasible with more Pokemon!!

I'm also sad Pokemon will be put aside, as there's a lot of weirder and overlooked Pokemon I love (so far have been lucky to see my faves in previews tho B-) ). Honestly I'd love a main game that doesn't introduce tons of new Pokemon but just focuses on developing the ones we have and making them fit in the world.

However, Pokemon is a franchise made for a market. New Pokemon generate buzz and help the game sell (important to offset the cost of development, games are incredibly expensive. I know you're thinking "yeah right, it's Pokemon" but no company wants to take that risk, game studios close constantly. And while I highly doubt Game Freak would be at risk of closing, they're at risk of other smaller projects suffering). The Main games are accompanied by a TCG, TV show, spin offs, Merchandise etc etc. There is (sadly) no time for delays. Honestly if they could delay it a year just to keep improving the game I would want that SO MUCH.

And I haven't even mentioned how terrifying of a task it actually is to animate, model, design, program and even just Organize that many Pokemon. We've taken it for granted. Im not fully caught up on the "Are they the same models" debate but even just transferring the models to the switch would be a monumental task. It is entirely possible that the switch renders things differently, or the rigs broke or any number of things that even if they didn't completely remake the models would make devs have to fix 1,000+ 3d models. AND MAKE NEW ONES FOR TRAINERS, ENVIRONMENT, FX, PROPS, PLUS LOW AND HIGH POLY VERSIONS OF THESE!

And considering the pipeline, they may have had to get the models done EARLIER so the riggers and animators could get to work. They didn't have the entire development time to do it, and they sure as hell aren't being lazy.

But I can say I'm interested to see what Pokemon can achieve by managing the scope like this. I'm a sucker for Pokemon world building and seeing Pokemon in the wild in their environments is awesome! I'd love them to feel organic, like they fit together in this world, and with people. So while I'm definitely sad about the Pokedex cuts, I support the decision and look forward to seeing the Pokemon who miss out this game get to reappear in other forms of poke media. They're still around!!

#pokeblogging #long post

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resetkid · 7 years ago

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THIS IS RESETKID’S FIRST FOLLOW FOREVER. JUST A BIG POST TO BABBLE ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE MY FOLLOWERS AND HOW GRATEFUL I AM.

ART CRED .

I can’t believe I’ve been writing this dumb kid for two goddamn years now.

... Truth to be told I never thought my muse for Flurry would stick when I first came into this fandom. Nothing I do tends to stick--- I’m usually bored within a week or two and moving onto something else. But writing this brat and bringing her to life , portraying her the best I could just drew me in and at this point I’m in way too deep to leave.

She’s gone through so many changes--- from the sweet little pacifist I initially wrote , to the arrogant monster murdering brat in this blog’s first revamp , to... just a tired fierce little girl who’s done her best and is continuing to do her best now that she’s home again. I’m really proud of her! And I’m happy that I can write her to this day because she’s always been so fun and passionate and quick witted.

My partners here have all played a massive , massive role in making my time here fun. Everybody is so sweet and talented and understanding--- and they’ve helped me to improve along the way and made me feel like I really belong here. It wouldn’t be any fun without you guys! You’ve all helped me develop her character so much and put up with my caps lock mashing , emoticon heavy excitable chat out of character. You all write these great muses and we have these amazing interactions and relationships and cherish so much.

I’m super grateful and so... this post it to thank you all. Smooch---!

SPECIAL MENTIONS //

@im-sans-ational --- Aaaahhh. To be honest I tell you this softie stuff all the time and I bet you’re totally sick of hearing it! But here we are again ‘cause I could never leave you out of this. Um. Socks--- I care about you so much and being friends with you makes me so happy. Every time we talk I’m smiling and laughing and if things aren’t going great that day you always cheer me up a lot.

Part of the reason I’ve even stuck around in this fandom so long is owed to you because you’ve been such a sweet friend to me since I came and you’ve interacted with my brat girl from day one.

Your portrayal of Sans is absolutely great even though I know you doubt yourself a lot and often think otherwise. You’re think wrong when you think like that. All the thought that you put into his characterization and your ability to pull off both his serious and more jokey mannerisms seamlessly --- flawlessly --- awed me when I joined and you awe me to this day. He’s wonderfully in character and mysterious and just--- ugh. He is brilliant. And so are you! Thank you thank you thank you for being my friend and writing partner. ❤

@tibiahoncst / @casrouge / @herpsydaisy / @bottlemotions --- Latin! My love... my life... pffft. We’ve wrote and off since blindedbylv and our interactions never fail to bring the biggest smile to my face. Flurry and Squish have the most dynamic father-daughter relationship and I love them so much. My God.

They’re sweet and he’s patient and Flurry adores him more than I’ll ever be able to express with words in our threads. Nob is the purest child and the way you write both muses is gripping and thoughtful. I hope we write them for a long time because you are talented and lovely out of character and a wonderful friend. Not gonna lie , I rush to reply to our every thread because I cherish them all so much akjsladks!! Snugs,, :’3

@onehpwonder / @felllan / @scythism / @acrisolum / @skeledunce --- Danny Danny Danny!! I love you and all one hundred of your stinky sons. For real though; your layout and presentation is beautiful , you’re so positive and one of the sweetest mutuals to grace my dash , and easy to talk to out of character. The way you write and portray every muse is so sleek and everything reads so well...

I’m always going back to reread our interactions because they’re so fun and your replies are honestly breathtaking. Acri trying to cut Flurry’s head off and subsequently adopting her still makes me giggle --- her and Impact’s relationship is fascinating. Writing with you is a joy and I want us to continue being partners for a long , long time. Smooochh!!

@kurotsunolivia / @starberrykinder --- Ahhh?! Okay. I don’t even know where to start--- writing with you is the best. Kuro’s relationship with Flurry is one of my favorites I’ve ever developed on this blog. Though I don’t know much about her source material I really do think you put a lot of thought into her character and your headcanons for her.

The way you can portray her being brutally honest and tender towards her daughter in the same breath so well is staggering. Every thread we’ve had has been amazing and you’re so talented that I’m honestly flattered you wanted to write with me and interact with my dumb li’l brat of a muse in the first place! Your art is adorable , gushing about them ( and your super cute cat omg ) out of character is a joy and you’re a super cool mutual.

TALENTED MUTUALS ( TM ) //

@cartoonlonk / @revengefulhcart / @tazmily-farm-boy / @fcllenflowers / @pollenprince / @deadly-devotion / @fadedribbcn / @balefulblossom / @rivenstraws / @revivescere-flore / @universalcarnival / @existence-overwhelming / @stickid / @sparemercy / @matxrna / @remorseguarder / @smellslikejustice / @theirmercy / @talariis / @asktheseventhhuman / @dctcrmination / @pacifrisk-rp / @redemptnot / @sheundying / @dcbascd / @crascd / @masterprotector / @fellrot / @chosemercy / @mulcibere / @unmercyd / @kidfell / @madestars / @rollingsnowsmasher / @itsnojida / @flcwerpcwered

#long post //#i'm so sorry if i forgot anyone!!#i double checked but my memory is the actual Worst #but thank you so much omg.#i love everyone still following me and interacting with flurry #and i'm so happy i'm still here writing her.#;w;#you all made it possible for me to develop her and form all these relationships...#dfksjfddskg..#smooches u all

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nanf1c · 7 years ago

Text

Bold Truths

tagged by @maleccrazedauthor and @lightbanes !!! <3

1st rule: tag 9 mutuals you would like to know better

@female-overlord-3 @alecismyfuture @blissfullybane @crazyellephantrambles @daddariossmile @hoteldumorts @ladymatt @blj2007 @damnyoudaddario

2nd rule: bold the statements that are true

I am 5'7" or taller I wear glasses I have at least one tattoo (Two for now :)) I have at least one piercing (seven wow!) I have blonde hair I have brown eyes (poop eyes) I have short hair My abs are at least somewhat defined (its crazy i don’t do shit anymore and they still there, please stay bbys) I have or have had braces (went through phases before braces then braces twice, twice!)

PERSONALITY: I love meeting new people People tell me that I’m funny (hey i like making people laugh okay) Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me (absolutely) I enjoy physical challenges (bring on the work outs and dance routines and hard hikes please) I enjoy mental challenges (it’s healthy for your brain right??) I’m playfully rude with people I know well (i think strangers think we hate each other with how we talk lol) I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it There is something I would change about my personality (there is always room for improvement)

ABILITY: I can sing well I can play an instrument I can do over 30 pushups without stopping I’m a fast runner I can draw well (i mean i guess) I have a good memory I’m good at doing math in my head I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch (gimme dat french toast, spaghetti and rice) I know how to throw a proper punch (don’t mess with me man i watch movies so therefore i know how to punch)

HOBBIES: I enjoy playing sports I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else was I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else was I have learned a new song in the past week I work out at least once a week I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months I have drawn something in the past month (considering im taking two art classes i have drawn quite a bit lately) I enjoy writing (yesssssssssss when it isn’t stressful lol) Fandoms are my #1 passion (i’ll admit it) I do or have done martial arts

EXPERIENCES: I have had my first kiss (eighth grade i think) I have had alcohol (eighth grade i think lmao) I have scored the winning goal in a sports game I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting (yeah okay ill admit that too i guessssss) I have been at an overnight event (very tiring but fun!) I have been in a taxi (i mean you gotta at some point in your life right??) I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year (does taking my sister count?) I have beaten a video game in one day I have visited another country I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts (Hozier is fucking amazing and so is Weezer and rebelution wowoowwo)

RELATIONSHIPS: I’m in a relationship I have a crush on a celebrity (LOL uh yes Matthew the dork and that won’t ever change) I have a crush on someone I know I have been in at least 3 relationships (i honestly think just four) I have never been in a relationship I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them I get crushes easily I have had a crush on someone for over a year (glad we are past that one) I have been in a relationship for at least a year (yuuuuuuuup) I have had feelings for a friend (hey friends are awesome you can’t help it)

MY LIFE: I have at least one person I consider a “best friend” (without a doubt) I live close to my school (like fifteen min on the freeway is close right??) My parents are still together I have at least one sibling (twoooooooooooo) I live in the United States (for now) There is snow right now where I live I have hung out with a friend in the past month (Yes! thank god lol) I have a smartphone (duh) I have at least 15 CDs I share my room with someone (shared a room with my sister her whole life)

RANDOM SHIT: I have breakdanced I know a person named Jamie I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce (hard to understand his accent too) I have dyed my hair (Oh god the black hair phase) I’m listening to one song on repeat right now I have punched someone in the past week I know someone who has gone to jail I have broken a bone I have eaten a waffle today I know what I want to do with my life (i know what my dream is if that counts) I speak at least 2 languages I have made a new friend in the past year (uh yes may i present the two greatest people alive @blj2007 and @damnyoudaddario)

Thank you so much for the tag lovelies! Feel free to ignore this! it’s just for fun :)

#cute shit #tags #tag games

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bunnkick · 7 years ago

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Getting to Know People

Tagged by @sakamotorei (i haven’t done one of these in a long time, thank you!)

1ST RULE: Tag 10 people you want to get to know better 2ND RULE: BOLD the statements that are true

I TAG (of course, completely optional): @floweredtatamis, @kuyuan, @wolffgore, @nakamatachi, @im-sorry--im-so-sorry, @boogiekun

I am 5'7" or taller

I wear glasses

I have at least one tattoo

I have at least one piercing (kinda, the holes in my ears grew over and I haven’t done it again yet)

I have blonde hair

I have brown eyes

I have short hair

My abs are at least somewhat defined

I have or have had braces

PERSONALITY:

I love meeting new people

People tell me that I’m funny (I’m really bad at having my humour come across in text, but I’m good at opportunistic and in the moment jokes)

Helping others with their problems is a big priority for me (although I gotta be careful as I tend to go overboard and neglect myself for others a lot)

I enjoy physical challenges (it’s gotta be something I want to do though, like outside, I don’t like to be in a gym and pushing for goals there eas I find gyms hellscapes of misery)

I enjoy mental challenges

I’m playfully rude with people I know well (not so much know well, but with people who also treat me playfully the same, I’ll do it back)

I started saying something ironically and now I can’t stop saying it (chill, cool cool cool cool no doubt no doubt no doubt, fresh to death, referring to things as ‘hella’)

ABILITY:

I can sing well (I can but my brother used to make fun of me for signing so you rarely catch me doing it :I)

I can play an instrument (I learned guitar for 3 years and even my teacher couldn’t believe how bad I was and how I wasn’t improving, he and I both gave up lol)

I can do over 30 pushups without stopping (yes but I’ll hate every second of it)

I’m a fast runner

I can draw well (it’s my career and the only thing I excel at so frick I sure hope I do )

I have a good memory (memorization for recipes, events, and animal facts, yes. Knowing what day it is or what I did yesterday? Good luck me)

I’m good at doing math in my head (I’ve never been good or even passable at mental math)

I can hold my breath underwater for over a minute (I once got to 2 min 30, not bad?)

I have beaten at least 2 people in arm wrestling (I’m really competitive and I’ll take any wrestling or sparring challenge)

I know how to cook at least 3 meals from scratch (I cook a lot for myself and really like trying out new recipes, I get bored without food variety and I’m primarily motivated by the promise of good meals)

I know how to throw a proper punch (never had the chance to use this skill which I suppose is a good thing)

HOBBIES:

I enjoy playing sports (I avoid them though as I can really be competitive and it’s only fun for me if there’s little to no stakes, as I really hate to lose :I)

I’m on a sports team at my school or somewhere else

I’m in an orchestra or choir at my school or somewhere else

I have learned a new song in the past week (I officially finished learning ‘Not Tomorrow’ I guess?)

I work out at least once a week (I hike and run everyday with me pup)

I’ve gone for runs at least once a week in the warmer months

I have drawn something in the past month

FANDOMS ARE MY #1 PASSION (I like a great many things but I tend not to overobsess)

I do or have done martial arts (I have a black belt in Shotokan Karate, pretty rusty, but I still know the basics!)

EXPERIENCES:

I have had my first kiss (unfortunately I don’t remember it fondly :’I)

I have had alcohol

I have scored the winning goal in a sports game

I have watched an entire season of a TV show in one sitting

I have been at an overnight event (many)

I have been in a taxi

I have been in the hospital or ER in the past year (had some surgery in May, first time I’d ever been to the hospital for such a thing)

I have beaten a video game in one day (ReGRET)

I have visited another country (I love travelling and go elsewhere whenever I have funds to do so, which isn’t often, but hey, it’s always worth it)

I have been to one of my favorite band’s concerts (Yep! Saw a crazy amount of them at Osheaga and have been to a lot where I used to live, great music scene in the East Coast of Canada)

RELATIONSHIPS :

I’m in a relationship (ahahahaha I’ll be lucky to be in another before I die)

I have a crush on a celebrity

I have a crush on someone I know

I have been in at least 3 relationships (and they were very mediocre, really turned me off of being in them :I)

I have never been in a relationship

I have asked someone out or admitted my feelings to them

I get crushes easily

I have had a crush on someone for over a year (yeah and when I was going to confess and ask them out, my friend group kindly informed me he was gay before I did it, thank you! We remained friends but like I really had wanted to date him before I knew there was no way ;-;)

I have been in a relationship for at least a year

I have had feelings for a friend

MY LIFE:

I have at least one person I consider a “best friend”

I live close to my school

My parents are still together

I have at least one sibling

I live in the United States (Yikes, I used to, don’t regret not being there now)

There is snow right now where I live (nope wayyy too in the year early for that here)

I have hung out with a friend in the past month (all me friends are far far away)

I have a smartphone

I have at least 15 CDs

I share my room with someone

RANDOM SHIT:

I have breakdanced

I have had a teacher with a last name that’s hard to pronounce

I have dyed my hair (Many times, it is currently turquoise)

I’m listening to one song on repeat right now (Labyrinth by Toro Y Moi)

I have punched someone in the past week

I know someone who has gone to jail

I have broken a bone

I have eaten a waffle today

I know what I want to do with my life (more like I hope I do)

I speak at least 2 languages (French n’ english, learning Japanese and German)

I have made a new friend in the past year (Mmhmm! Met them in San Diego, they are lovely and hope to talk with them more)

#risky rambles #tag meme #text post #this was fun c:

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deaddrip · 8 years ago

Note

136 -> 146

136. What have you created that you’re most proud of?

umm… I’m not too sure? I’m not really proud about lots of the things I make- talking in an art sense lol But the thing ig I am most proud of atm is my Heathers animation thing. Even though I hate how JD looks in it aha137. What do you doubt?

I doubt a lotttt of things- mostly my abilities/ capabilities like being able to handle the next school year and still be able to do the things I wanna do bc I hear the school I’m going to next year is hella stressful rip Also my ability to improve my art skill.138. What are some of your morals?

uh tbh I’m not too familiar with how the word is used lmao but- I just kinda believe that eventually everything works out in the end?? idk??139. What do you want to be remembered for?

making some good jdonica art 140. What do you regret not doing in your childhood years?

lol i’m still a smol 141. What is your favorite fragrance?

any type of liek fresh scent?? or flowers??142. What do you think your last words will be?

’wait, what?’143. Who or what do you take for granted?

the friends I have tbh (mostly irl)- I kinda feel like since im so into working on art Ive been pushing them all way in favor of my work and… idk how to feel about that. I kinda feel like one day I’ll lose connections with them so… there’s that

144. Why would you be annoying as a roommate?

I’d work throughout the night and have my headphones blasting with my laptop screen on- probably be a bit hard to sleep lmao

145. What is something you’re insecure about?

my tooth gap ahhaaa

146. What’s the best & worst piece of advice you’ve received?

best- literally so simple: Just keep going, keep moving forward (this part is mainly for art but-) it doesnt matter if you hate the art you created that day because at least youre working at getting better. There’s no way to improve if you just say “that’s too hard.” and give up because then youre getting no where.

worst- hmmm uhh idk- I kinda take advice how it’s given and if I don’t like it I use it anyways?? idk?? lmao srry

#littlcgoldbird #ask #anon #some of these i feel like were pretty deep lmao #idk odjadja

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dreadsandlace-blog1 · 8 years ago

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Trove Codes

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