#im doing my best to keep stuff largely the same but theres some things im going to end up cutting out (treehouse kids entirely i think...)

[hakuryuu]

im doing a lamsm pretty-up as a nano consolation prize and i forgot that it really does just start with dot and matty going to do like the underwater equivalent of cow-tipping

[sukunasboytoy]

typed this up after watching the movie on opening n i was gonna keep it in the drafts for abt a week before posting it but ppl r talking abt it so im gonna go ahead n post it now !

‼️ cw: alien romulus spoilers ‼️

there is so much to be said abt andy im not even kidding theres so many conversations that can be had they include:

the black chara thats the emotional support for a white chara (andys whole thing is that he tells bad puns to rain to cheer her up - his one n only reason for existence is the do wtvr is best for rain is his literally a black chara that exists to prop up n support a white chara)

white feminism/white tears (how rain centers her own pain over the pain she caused andy, rain victimizes herself n openly argues w andy for turning on her n aligning himself w wy even tho she left him first - ofc they work thru this at the end but yk)

i rlly feel like andy has feelings for rain but hes been ‘brother zoned’ n his line abt ‘u can finally see me as a adult’ is what solidified that for me but i do think a mix of ableism n racism r at play there (black man being infantilized by the white woman he has feelings for bc of his blackness n mental (programming???) disability)

white savorism - inb4 rain ran back to andy at the end of the movie andy depended on rain for survival (needing help to fend off attackers at the start of the movie, rain constantly stepped in n defended andy against the anti-synth bigot which could be read as a metaphor for racism here, but its rain using her privilege as a flesh person (again metaphor for racism n ableism here) to constantly save andy that props her up as the Good Person even tho shes willing to use n abandon him)

andy doesnt rlly have any agency- he does what he feels whats best for rain (black chara used to prop up white chara) gets his agency overridden (by another white chara rook n mu/th/ur) n then makes the switch back to supporting rain (sure he chooses to let rain take the module out but yk plot convenience- they need the black man to sacrifice his life to save the white woman)

like dont get me wrong its great to have a black n disabled chara on screen n its great that he gets to be morally ambiguous (my personal fave) n i like that andy n rain have a complicated messy relationship n they hurt each other (like ppl do) but yk … hard not to notice some of this stuff yk

n i do think its on purpose bc synths r seen as not human/subhuman in the same way poc n neurodivergent ppl r (esp for his lack of empathy n emotions) hes viewed as inherently dangerous (like men of color r viewed as being innately violent n aggressive n mentally ill ppl r seen as violent n unpredictable)

rains decision to leave him behind bc hes “not rlly human bc he doesnt actually feel” is a good metaphor n representation for how poc r used as stepping stones n viewed as not “real” ppl by white ppl n the same can be said for neurodivergent ppl esp mentally disabled ppl rain seems to be fulfilled by andy needing her but is willing to leave him behind the moment including him becomes a hinder ace to her (n ofc its fixed in the end- but i like synths being a more obvious metaphor for ppl who r dehumanized in society aliens have largely been a white cast franchise so taking the narrative of the bigotry that synths face in the universe n having that applied to a synth that is black n disabled is great n i rlly like that the bigotry is portrayed in those subtle ways on screen like andys lack of agency n being used as a literal prop for the white woman by literally existing to support her)

[beetlebug-bii]

Heya, first of all im sorry for that terrible joke i made in the comment section xD

I'd like to request a Solomon x Reader

I'm a sucker for him and can't find good ffs or more like not much of him TT

Scenario:

Song to listen to if you want too

( hammock - then the quiet explosion)

So I've been thinking of a scenario where MC is kind of annoyed from the brothers always near them and clinging on them, so that they have no privacy.

Solomon ( who has a crush on them) sees that the reader is exhausted and takes her to a quiet place to rest with him ( the rest is your imagination)

I loved the joke so much lmaooo

Alright this is my first one in a long while so please cut me some slack! I did my very best so I hope you like it! O7

How To Cure Depression (Solomon x GN!Reader)

You

Cannot 

Be

Serious

This is the third time this week

THE THIRD TIME THAT YOU HAVE WALKED INTO YOUR OWN ROOM TO HAVE IT BE IN SHAMBLES 

IT IS TUESDAY!?!?

HOW IN THE WORLD

IN A HOUSE THIS BIG

IS YOUR ROOM ALWAYS THE CENTER OF ATTENTION 

OH THATS RIGHT

BECAUSE EVERYONE WHO LIVES HERE BREAKS IN

AND THEY START FIGHTS WHEN SOMEONE ELSE DOES THE SAME THING

You just

Cant

Take it anymore

Lucifer is always critiquing your organization and how clean the room is

Mammon is always stealing your stuff

Levi and Satan are judging your interests all. the. time.

Asmo steals your clothes for selfies

Beel gets food on the floor

and Belphie messes up your bed at least six times a day

Why do they always have to do this

They have their own rooms

Why cant you?

you are so sick of cleaning up after their mess

so tired of always having to mediate fights

and that's why you're here you suppose

You couldn't even handle being in the house to listen to their excuses anymore

So you came here

The courtyard of the Royal Academy of Diavolo

It's the only place you can even feel like you can breathe right now, and even now you're struggling to keep the tears in

You close your eyes and take a breath, your head resting on your knees

Theres a nice breeze today…

It smells like flowers almost…

You can feel the sun shining on your skin too…its so warm…you missed that feeling…

Wait a second

aren't you underground right now?

Why is there a breeze??? Even if there was a breeze, why does it smell like flowers?? 

And there definitely shouldn't be a sunlight feeling??

Finally taking a moment to look up, you lock eyes with the one and only shady wizard 

You almost want to sigh

There goes peace…goodbye peace…you will be missed…

But the way he's looking at you is…different

He's missing his signature smirk that always seems to be plastered on his face

Instead it's been replaced with something slightly softer…kind…

"Hey" he took a few steps forward

Leaning down next to you, and wiping a teardrop from your cheek

"...hey…" you said back, still unsure

Solomon sits beside you, leaning against the large stone wall hiding you from the rest of the world

"What happened?"

And with that

You broke

You cried on and on and on

Sobbing about how overwhelmed you were, how nothing you did was good enough, how exhausted you were all the time

You really hadn't meant to

But by the end you were just a bundle of tears

You were expecting a comment on how small your problems were

or maybe even a laugh because what did you expect? They ARE demons after all…

What you weren't expecting

Was Solomon gently taking your hand

And whispering a slight follow me

Gently he led you deeper within the courtyard, getting ever so slightly lost between the hedges

"Close your eyes" he said, with a slight smirk

and in that moment you werent sure if you should trust him

On one hand, he has yet to bully you

On the other, you might commit homicide if he starts now

You sigh and close your eyes

After a few moments of absolutely nothing happening you open them

And poof the wizard is gone

Are

You

Serious

He led you into what is basically a hedgemaze and then left!?

You huff, more annoyed now than you were before

You could go commit arson

You could ask diavolo so politely

He would probably say yes ri-

AAAAAAAA

you let out a short scream as a hand shoots out from within one of the hedges

You can hear Solomon laugh slightly from inside 

oh you motherfu-

The hand grabs you and pulls you in

After being yanked through the bushes, you find yourself in a small cove…

Flowers filled the ground, and the grass was so soft….and there was sunlight- how?

"Where…" you whispered, still a bit awestruck 

A place like this definitely shouldn't exist in the devildom…

"This is a little piece of home" Solomon explained, while taking a seat on the soft ground, "I made it with an illusion spell of sorts…I come here when things get difficult" 

You gently sat next to Solomon 

Taking it all in

Who knew the shady wizard had a soft side…

Solomon pulled your head down to his lap, one hand gently running through your hair while the other pulled out a book

He softly began to read

"I don't trust stairs…they are always up to something"

…huh

"Where do ghosts become pilots?...fright school"

…no

"Why did the cookie go to the doctor? It was feeling crumby"

…you were going to kill him

…but maybe later

You laughed and gently swatted Solomon's book of "1000 dad jokes to cheer up people with depression"

How sweet of him

Solomon laughed and poked at your cheeks

you really were beautiful when you smiled

Not that he could say that of course

…not yet

He wanted to savor this moment by your side for just a bit longer

Just the two of you

Safe in your little bubble

Away from the rest of the world

Solomon gently pet your hair until you fell asleep

Watching with a gentle smile

Before placing a small kiss on your forehead

He would give the brothers a piece of his mind later

[starlitgroves]

more syscourse cause im mad feel free to skip

im not gonna tag this or mention anyone specifically because i dont want to be fucking attacked but our largely inflated sense of justice is going GRGRGRGGR so i need to make my point a bit here so im sure weve all seen the pluralpunk system punk argument currently going on, at this point i was about to go yay !! new tag so people will stop bitching and leave each other alone !!! but noooooo someone went and made a flag going grgr i hate anti endos heres a flag with a dead animal in the mouth of its predator. which, weird in the first place to make that, why are you so pressed its a tag on tumblr pls go touch grass, but depicting a prey animal DEAD on a flag 'reclaiming a term from the evil stupid antis' is?? did you not connect the dots??? that people would interpret it this way???? like if its reallyyy about the field of psychiatry as a whole sure whatever, but don't get mad at people for missing your symbolism when the thing youre symbolising had nothing to do with the conversation.

and THEN theres the people attacking the person who pointed this out are?? are they ok??? like, idk abotu yall but they probably just opened the syspunk tag, saw that bullshit, blocked, then went 'hey guys thats really weird' on their own account, they most likely !!! did not go snooping on that persons account first to see if that person has a cdd or not before blocking because !!! thats kinda weird !!! same thread for the people who are going 'I HAVE A FUCKKING CDD BITCH YOU FCUCKING BITCH WE HATE YOU ANTI ENDOS ARE EVIL YOURE VICTIMISING YOURSELF BECAUSE ME AND THIS OTHER RANDOM GUY AND THE CREATOR OF THE FLAG HAVE CDDS' compared to the people i have personally seen saying 'chains + predator + its dead prey + creator aggressively hating a group of people = people in that group thinking it was targeted' girl.... nobody cares if you have a cdd or not you're just mean, youre just yelling at abused kids, idc if you were also or are also an abused kid, having a shit life does not make you unable to make someone elses life shittier also even the creators response if awful,, like 'idc if you feel unsafe by the possible insinuation that people are going to hurt you' ??? weird which brings me to YET ANOTHER POINT because no im not done i could talk about how stupid some people are forever the extremely negative generalisations (which are on both side, but i'm specifically referencing the response from the flag maker, specifically specifically "tbh If it made anti endos feel unsafe..I kinda don’t care lol anti endos never made anyone feel safe" do you now see how cynical that is?? why do i feel like i have to beg people to treat each other with like a smidge of humanity, like are you reading this?? you dont care if you make other human beings feel unsafe like thats not even really my point but i have to keep coming back to that bit there but like actually my point is, stop talking to each other, i'm being so fr, youre like evil siblings that need their own corner but get jealous then ruin it then argue then need their own corner and the cycle just repeats, use the tag filters, use tags properly, if you dont like a post, block the user, i thought this was basic internet knowledge and btw !! this is coming from someone who is technically anti endo, but you know what !! i interact with endos and other system types on discord servers and stuff because it is (and let me say it real loud for the people who have their head in the ground) A PUBLIC SPACE. if you dont want to interact with an individual so bad, it is your job to facilitate that, but guess what !! theres always going to be overlap because not everyone can control everything, so everyones best bet is to just shut your mouth, please i am begging shut your mouth, if you happen to come across one another accidentally and it comes up, just say smth like "i know we wont agree on this topic, so lets not talk about it" because lets be so fr, there are bigger issues, which i know sounds very hypercritical of someone who has spent the last however long typing this out but whatever, because its the internet nobody will care by tomorrow, just treat each other like people

[just-a-little-silly]

also wanted to take a moment to answer some questions from @eye-cri againn quite honestly reading these made me so happy^^

ughrgh kajal my girl🩵

(note: this is quite a long post so yk just fyi^^)

yes indeed the skirt was a nightmare to render but was it worth it? absolutely. and yeee the earrings are such an important part of her design (shes hardly ever seen w/ out them :>>) and yes, they do ring!! (trust zeus teases her for it when they’re initially meeting) the glove is actually tied to her story, she uses it to cover a symbol on her hand linked to her powers (ill go into detail about that in a bit). also kajal is of fae descent, (hence the pointed ears, i think i also meant to add a tail to her design but we’ll see abt that). as for how she got in to the academy, she just applied to the academy for fun (fae court stuff bored her- i have so much fae lore for this universe i.) and got accepted into the night class- she wanted to get away from home for a bit and thought some fancy boarding school/ academy in gedonelune would be interesting (i honestly forgot how getting into the academy works and haven’t gone back to check in a while so. i hope that works TT). she’s close friends with caesar, leslie and hiro. (i personally like that hiro and kajal both have special unique skills- ill touch on it later.)

ALSO YES. ZEUS. KAJAL. ZEJAL. IM. THEY- 💕🥺🩵✨❤️ zeus nationnnnn YES. hes just so🥺🩵🩵.

i truly cannot put into words how much they mean to me. zeus as a character is just so so wonderful and i. cannot. describe. how much i love him :>> anyways zejal (the ship name :PP) has been my precious lil thing for YEARS now im. (i’ll try to keep this brief so i dont go on forever)- zeus and kajal are very much rivals to lovers. they start out as classmates and spend most of their first year trying to one up one another. they do eventually start to begrudgingly respect one another and before he knows it, zeus is whipped for her. she too forms her own budding crush but isn’t really sure what to do about it because she doesn’t think zeus would ever feel the same way sooo she bottles it down and ignores it- subsequently (and perhaps inadvertently) ignoring him too. he doesn’t take that too well and it stays pretty tense between them for a bit until everything boils over and zeus ends up confessing followed almost immediately by kajal. thats just a ridiculously brief summary lmaoo- theres a lot to their story TT.

as for styling her uniform, i think she keeps it pretty simple just a regular night class uniform- she will however sometimes be spotted with a large floofy orange scarf (she borrows zeus’s- she likes how soft it is and he honestly loves to see her wear it)

the type of magic she specializes in are ancient curses and incantations. girl has LOADS of ancient grimoires she could spend hours translating and decoding the spells described in them. In fact she ends up using her knowledge of ancient magic to formulate her own unique spell (a concept i might have borrowed from twst in all honesty). she calls it, “evil eye” and its basically a magic circle w/ an evil eye design in the middle - it defends her from malicious intent however, considering that shes supposed to be rather powerful i took it a step further and made it so that using it, kajal can temporarily shut down people’s magic if they intend to do her any harm. she has the symbol marked on her right palm so she can activate it faster. (smthn smthn hiro and kajal bonding over having unique abilities- hiro would actually approach her bc she knows a lot about sealing magic away + she tries her best to help him research his own curse and whatnot) i also just love how both she and zeus work with magic circles i. ugh💕.

—> also the thought of her, caesar and leslie having get togethers where they gossip about random things while drinking chai she prepares hasn’t left my mind.

[goremet-chef]

dumb little (very long actually) character analysis for dod n co, just my little guys. im good at compartmentalizing my troubles so thats mainly what they are, very good outlet. theyre really personal so it gets kinda heavy but i dont mind sharing em cuz seeing them as characters rather than states of mind soothes it a bit

some world exposition also, demons and angels live in vague harmony. its not a matter of sinful evil creature vs divine pure creature, its just 2 different cogs in the same machine, working together to keep things running. some angels and demons can hold those sorts of prejudice though, but for the most part its even

(slight nsfw warning with repentance also)

DO-OR-DIE ...

hes a demon, specifically a dream walker. dream walking demons are observers, they usually arent able to be perceived by humans or whoever. they spend most of their time wandering and watching over people to see what theyre doing, sometimes living through them. standard stuff.

his problem is that over time hes developed a corruption. corruptions cause the demon to be fundamentally flawed in some way that harms the demons wellbeing and affects its ability to live. in these instances, they are granted an angel to help them recover. usually it only takes one depending on the severity and the demons willingness to listen. dod has 3.

sometimes angels are unsuccessful, which is a problem because corrupted demons can become large threats. beings motivated by anguish alone are dangerous. thats another reason they send angels to save them.

he used to be rather odd and charming as any demon would be, but his corruption has made him awkward and unsocialized. sometimes he remembers himself before this, but its distant and blurry.

he represents me at a base level. he thinks too much and his corruption has lead to a massive hole forming in his center. he feels empty, so he fills the empty space with anger and fear and love. his design mainly encompasses the split in emotions i feel a lot. mindless joy or unmanageable sadness

CHASM ...

chasm is benevolent and thoughtful angel, and he sees the truth. he delivers honesty and rational advice. he wants the best for dod, but his approach is what complicates things. hes blunt, theres no point in sugar coating reality. his delivery brings more harm than good to dod, despite his good intentions.

in his attempts to calm dod, he'll tell him that no one cares enough about him to be angry with him, which is backhanded reassurance and it often fails. despite this, he has the highest chance of helping dod recover. dod is incapable of listening and taking it to heart because chasms words hurt.

chasm cares for dod, but hes here on assignment and his care manifests through trying to get him recovered. no matter how avoidant and arrogant dod is, chasm is always patient with him. recovery takes time.

the relationship that is formed through the recovery process with the demon and their angels can range from strictly business and a farewell once its over to lifelong companions. thats how chasm sees dod, hes a naturally empathetic angel and feels for him quite a bit. a shoulder to lean on, if dod ever has the sense to lean on anyone other than himself

thought process consists of a lot of spiraling and hysteria, and then running straight into that wall. "they dont care enough to be annoyed or mad at you, its not a big deal" but thats kind of a big deal to me. its helpful, but its too painful to bear. i didnt make chasms original design but i did change it quite a bit. gave him a mouth on his stomach as well as? what COULD be top scars but also look like closed, tired eyes. he was a shapeshifting type of guy before but now he mainly keeps insect features or casual angel features like bird wings and a halo

HILO ...

after observing that chasms help wasnt working, they sent dod another angel. hilo is optimistic and eccentric, and he sees the truth. if reality is bringing you down, why not just leave? he can take dod anywhere he wants to go, he can allow him to be anyone he wants past his usual observation, and it almost works.

unfortunately, this method is flawed. it feels good, but it doesnt tackle the root of his issue, instead opting to ignore it. time goes on and hes getting more and more corrupted, and despite how often he indulges in hilo's help, he knows its not what he needs.

hilo doesnt see it that way. even if his idea of recovery is inaccurate, hes got dods best interest in mind, similar to chasm. he assumes if he can take dod away from the pain thats corrupting him, he'll be saved. he wants him to smile, wants him to be creative, wants to nourish the small glimmer of joy and let dod grow it out on his own, but when the source of the corruption is unaddressed, it halts that completely

hilo and chasm often clash. the eternal battle between reality and fantasy, between fact and fiction. they dont see eye to eye, because their methods recovery are complete opposites. hilo is lighthearted, and treats dod as a friend. his unserious nature is avoidant in itself

daydreaming and dissociation are household names in the home of ominic, which i mean. yeah. im part of a system thats like our whole thing 💀 i spend MOST of my days completely absent from reality, just stuck in place pretending to be someone else until i have to get up for food or some shit. feels great, but no progress. again, i didnt make his original design, but i did redesign him so one thing i added in his redesign specifically is that underneath the long sleeves of his sweater, his skin is gross like dead almost. blackened and dried which basically just represents the bad part about dissociating so much. it seems great at surface level but if you peel back some layers its clearly not good for you

REPENTANCE ...

surely if he had 3 angels, they could work together and finally save him right..? wrong! repentance is high strung and strict, and he sees the truth. dod is a creature of sin, and he should be regarded as such. he thinks the only way for dod to truly repent and recover is to beg god for mercy, but until that happens he has no problem spitting insults and making sure he knows how disgusting he is

repentance views himself as the guideline for how any angel should be and thinks hes the best to help dod recover. in his own words, hes "keeping him humble".

thats where him and chasm tend to clash, much more intensely than chasm does with hilo (and more than hilo and repentance. repentance honestly just ignores hilo at this point, hilo thinks hes dumb). dod is stuck in a cycle of "everyone hates you, you dont deserve anything" and "no one cares enough to hate you" which. theyre actively working against eachother and bringing more confusion into his life.

repentance isnt as pure as he thinks he is, though. at some point he develops a sexual relationship with dod, which leads to some heavy denial. if it was anyone else he would consider it an affront to god, but hes good and holy... so of course hes only doing his best to help dod recover from his corruption. its a blessing, surely. ends up developing some complex feelings towards dod. still just as rude as always but his needs are completely selfish. hes not helping dod, hes helping himself, he just refuses to see it that way

i think my bpd is more violent to me than anyone else, sometimes i do split and get really angry but more often than not that anger is directed towards myself. thats basically what repentance is. bitter voice of a viper. also an outlet for my hypersexuality cuz thats really overbearing honestly. his design has some deeper meanings as well. the wings on his 'head' are upright because he views himself as being flawless and always correct, but the wings on his hips are upside down which. can symbolize a few different things in the context of him 💀 he represents my personal grievances with religion as well

RED HERRING ...

having 3 opposing angels is a lot of chaos, and chaos has formed a subdemon. red herring is quiet, and simple. he rarely ever speaks and is often hard to read. he stays out of the way and lingers around dod most of the time. his form is unstable and shifts a lot.

he is simple, but he has feelings, and his expression is that of guilt and deception. lots of mixed feelings have made dod feel like hes not who he says he is, like hes tricking those around him. if hes in a position where hes under stress and has to confront those feelings dod holds, he becomes active.

active subdemons play a part, and his part is feeling like he doesnt belong. like his true colors need to be shown so everyone will be too scared to touch him. he doesnt know if hes guilty or not of deceiving everyone, but he'll show it anyways as a last act of honor.

as his name implies, hes like a misleading piece of information. whether or not thats based in truth doesnt matter, its just how dod feels. feels like he doesnt deserve anything due to how loud repentance is. ultimately all 3 of them have caused dod some kind of pain and each subdemon represents that individual pain like some kind of complex spider web. i made him randomly when i was doing really bad so his design is simple but sometimes you need a simple character to vent yr feelings with

PLAYING HOOKY ...

another subdemon. hes silly and lighthearted, very similar to hilo. his expression is also similar. instead of just ditching reality, why not ditch everything? leave leave leave! run away from responsibility, run away from friends, run away from life. fool proof.

hes actually fun, a refreshing mix of wittiness and joy with a dash of edginess. its a completely disastrous mixture for dod because it makes it incredibly easy for him to relate to hooky and follow his lead. he can talk him into anything

his design reflects that. even though his nature is avoidance, his skin is sticky like tar, and he can hook others into place (he also grapples around with his hooks but thats not important i just think its cool)

sticky goopy little guy but hes like hilo in a worse way. mainly just more hiding but on the basis of fear instead of dissociation. him, dod, and red herring are prone to having their chest split open. represents different things, from feeling vulnerable and having yr guts on display to the gaping void thats slowly killing dod himself

I AM MY OWN ACTIONS ...

or i am for short. the final subdemon. he mirrors chasms message and is by far the most different subdemon from dod. his expression is taking the blame fully, even if its not all on you. there is an element of moving forward as well, but how can you come to terms with something you dont even know is true? its all hearsay, angels spitting back and forth between eachother, how can you know for certain?

thats the part that gets dod stuck and its why i am is so vastly different. he seems unreachable almost. dod is stubborn. even if hes certain hes the root of all his problems and hes just this horrible awful person, he cant say for certain. all the angels are certain of different things, whats he supposed to believe?

i try to keep it open ended with this whole thing. maybe he is a horrible person. who knows. we literally dont SKJFS

i am is quiet but does speak unlike red herring. his voice is soft like chasms, and he prefers lurking in the shadows. hes this presence that dod can feel, lingering in the background. he can accept it whenever, but he wont.

i think i laid out everything with this guy but i gave him a mixture of chasms buggy aspects as well as the tail of a coelacanth because to me coelacanths symbolize resilience. stick it out a bit longer, dont let them drive you to your grave. also yes he does climb on walls like a bug

okay im done now. this is kinda.. i mean its a bit embarrassing laying out my brain like this but i really like them as characters so i dont mind sharing it. i love all the different dynamics

[heliianth]

here’s another ask for you: talk abt whatever you want!!!

WAUGH thank u for a new one!!!!! ilysm!!!!!

rambling abt sonic and character foils and the IDW comics below the cut this is aimless enough for me to want it be an opt-in experience LOL

i was gonna talk abt this last night but it was 11 AnyWay. i saw a criticism of the IDW comics on reddit a long time ago and its got me thinking recently. someone said they didn't quite enjoy the way the comic was tackling sonic as a character not because of the inconsistencies in his pre-established beliefs (which are present) per se but because IDW keeps challenging them in ways that don't feel, from what i remember the comment saying, "good-spirited"? i hadnt heard that critique before so it was unique enough to catch my interest but not actually think much until now. but theres a reason for that hold on ok

so. to preface this whole thing. some of the most beloved stories in the series are ones that Do challenge sonic's beliefs. thats the reason why, when the series wants to tackle more mature content, they make foil characters. sa2 which reddit largely considers as having the best story has foil characters everywhere but specifically it spends a lot of energy on it's themes of identity and growth by making sonic and shadow clash not just physically but ideologically. that talk they have after final rush/chase basically spells it out and its framed as shadow hearing sonic out and then dismissing him ("what are you/i'm me/i see, well, i'm gonna beat your ass" <- basically). and then later on sonic's viewpoint is reinforced when shadow (airquotes) dies, but not before sonic himself is visibly impacted in the credits sequence. that whole story right there was, at least thematically, one about sonic having his beliefs challenged. SatBK does this as well, a game which is applauded within the general community as having the most accurate sonic characterization. stories that do adjacent things, like the OVA, s3&k, sa1, where character foils are a prominent part of the theming (though maybe not presented in a way where sonic himself necessarily feels ideologically Challenged), are often very popular as well

the time i saw the criticism was about when the surge saga was coming to an end, but i was new at that point so i really dismissed the whole discussion. sonics allowed to be challenged, thats what happens when you have a static character as a protagonist. but now that ive reread IDW a few times and have identified some of my own issues with the run so far i've been thinking about that reddit comment more often. why is the way IDW challenges sonic so different from the way stories like SatBK or sa2 challenge him? why is one intriguing and the other not "good-spirited?" nowadays i think the issue is less with tone or intent like the wording of the original comment implies, but the conclusion of those stories. all of those previous examples i gave culimate in sonic succeeding, yes bc hes the title character, but moreso bc hes the vehicle through which the themes of the series are delivered. SatBK wasn't going to have merlina win because the story was trying to tell the audience that life is only worth living when its finite. sa2 killed off shadow because it was about how being unable to move on eats someone from the inside out. these are broad overarching themes that are present in the whole series and its generally agreed that sonic at his best is representative of those themes, which is why hes static

but IDW kind of has a messy history with conclusions. or, at least, conclusions that feel like they are trying to Say something in the way i've been talking about. after everything is done and the threat of the week is defeated, it all kind of returns back to a status quo, which im very sure is not the fault of the writers. long-running series are supposed to have a status quo that keeps stuff the same so that new audiences wont be alienated by huge character histories and lore timelines and things to catch up on (The Most Intimidating thing abt like archie for example). its partially why u see almost no fleshed out arcs that span multiple games after 06 (man the word partially is doing some legwork there but if i talked abt why sonic games changed so drastically after the mid 2000's i would be here all fucking day). and there are conversations to be held about that status quo and its place in the games and whether its beneficial or not but imo when talking about IDW, a comic which is supposed to have continuity, it kind of obliterates the potential of having meaningful conclusions and the themes that come along with them. because IDW always approaches "sonic feels ideoloically challenged" and it never goes beyond it. it nudges and hints at criticism of IDW sonic's beliefs, actions, and philosophy, but it doesn't do anything with it. the status quo says sonic can't change that much, which is good when the conclusion of stories have themes that prove he's already got it figured out, and bad when there's a big gaping question mark where a lesson should be. the surge saga i think is the glaring example of this precisely because its so conclusionless (theres also how sonic himself engages with her but thats a convo for another day).

so when that redditor said they thought the surge saga lacked a "good-spiritedness" that stories with a similar concept like SatBK or sa2 had i think they were picking up the vibes of the story being kind of... pointless at least in terms of themes and actual impact on the characters, rather than a lack of earnestness, a tone blunder, or strange intent on the part of the writers

im really curious how the urban warfare saga is resolved now precisely bc this lack of meaningful conclusion problem is so prevalent . depending on how passionate i am i may make a more formal analysis post abt it or something, but probably not considering i read IDW very very casually . which feels like a contradiction after writing all this but . yanno

[my-lunaberg]

Throughout this entire Tubbo Joins Las Nevadas vod there was just this alarm going off in the back of my brain going "QUACKITY DREAM PARRALLELS QUACKITY DREAM PARALLELS QUA" and I initially just dismissed it because, Quackity seeming pretty manipulative in that conversation and Dream being confirmed pretty manipulative doesnt mean theres some kind of parallel there, yknow. However, then i thought about it a bit more and yes, yes there are parallels

Before we start though, if any part of this seems like weird disconnected rambling to you, please do me a favor and go on my blog and go through my c!Dream and c!Quackity tags. The thing about all of my analysis posts is they kinda build off eachother and the thing about me is that I hate repeating myself so I just end up scantily referencing some other posts of mine, probably leaving the people who arent caught up on the seven analyses from a blog with like 20 followers confused. So yeah, heres that disclaimer

Tldr: Dream doesnt care about politics at all, Quackity cares very much. Dream wants to be The Leader in a very wishy-washy Confident Guy Whose House Everyone Hangs Out Is The Proxy-Leader Of This Friend Group-way, Quackity wants to be The Leader of a nation (ie. President). Dream cares about the individuals and sees governments and political movements as a means to the end of manipulating other people, Quackity cares about the governments and political movements and sees individuals as a means to the end of manipulating the politics of the server. Thats all the important stuff I think

Now, i this post Id like to talk about the ways in which they are manipulative. In one sentence, Dream largely relies on negativity while Quackity largely relies on positivity. Obviously Im specifiying largely bc you cant just rely on the same few tricks when youre trying to manipulate a bunch of people, you gatta be versatile and you gotta be opportunistic otherwise you cant do shit. The way Dream gets others to do what he wants is either through threatening them (notable examples are Quackity, Eret and Wilbur during the Lmanberg war) or through systemically breaking them down until they do what he wants, like he tried with Tommy (I say tried because he wasnt successful, like at all). Quackity meanwhile focuses a lot more on positive reinforcement, trying to make himself as well as his country look as good as possible and complementing those 'beneath' him when they do what he asks correctly, while not lingering on their mistakes or flaws, whereas Dream would use those to further beat them down.

I think the reasons they choose to do it like that are pretty complex, for the sake of this analysis I'll just focus on one of them: Dream lost a lot of his goodwill with the majority of the (active) server members fairly early on and he tries to turn that into an advantage by just 'leaning into it' so to speak. Quackity also lost a lot of his goodwill with the server when he joined Schlatt, however, he has since done his best to regain it, pretty sucessfully. I think he did it deliberately, both because he does care a lot about other peoples approval and, more relevently for Las Nevadas, because he realized that it doesnt matter how you gain power, if the people dont like their leader, theyre just going to get rid of them. Another thing to keep in mind is their difference in resources and combat ability. Before Dream was locked in jail he was practically untouchable because you couldnt fight him because if you tried, he was guaranteed to kill you because his armor was too strong and he was too good of a fighter. He could get away with pretty much anything because you cant refute a sword to your throat. Quackity doesnt have that, hell, he barely wears armor most of the time. Because he already knows hes not going to beat a lot of people in a physical fight, he instead makes himself seem vulnerable in order to lower peoples guards and make himself appear more trustworthy. Dream also definitely tried to do something similar when Tommy visited him on his first day, where he tried to seem pathetic and pitiable, now that he couldnt be threatening anymore.

Anyway, thats it. I feel like thats a weird note to end it on but my brains all out of juice again so

[wadesprincessboy]

Again with the "hi im also a Jew in Aotearoa" reblog, ive also noticed a huge rise in antisemitism. Since oct 7 i have felt increasingly unsafe existing as a Jewish person. I also happen to live in an area that is very largely leftist (or at least my circles in the area are) and i honestly feel most unsafe because of the leftists. Ive seen posters that are very clearly antisemitic everywhere, and the ones i saw calling for the freeing of hostages were crossed out and torn down. Ive shared this before but a pride event put in their kaupapa that theyre anti-zionist and my mum wore a hebrew shirt to the event (she went despite the anti-zionist stuff because its pride and she wanted to go) that said pride in rainbow letters. She was going to wear it regardless of the events kaupapa, and it was clearly a pride shirt, but she got disgusted looks from a lot of people.

Ive been using my dads last name out of concern for my safety due to having a very Jewish last name from my mum. I hate my dads name and it makes me feel sick to use it, but its for my safety. I always use my chosen name because its English, and when people ask about my birth name, which is Hebrew, and I tell them its Hebrew they again give disgusted looks. Prior to Oct 7 people would be interested in the story of my mum growing up in Jerusalem and how important being Jewish is to us, but now I just say the name was chosen because of the singer. I dont want to say the truth because im scared ill get hurt.

My mother overshares a lot and cant resist telling people about how she grew up in Israel and how important to her it is to go back some day, and every time she says it I prepare for the worst. The worst that's happened is again, the look, but im always scared.

All the leftists i know love hamas, some are celebrating the Amsterdam pogrom, they all dropped me for saying Jewish people have a right to exist in Israel. Not even saying Im a zionist, just saying Jews are indigenous and have rights. They dropped me. They put out "bewares" on socials.

I go to a yearly drama camp and so many people from there that i considered friends did things like that and i almost didnt apply to go back next year despite how much i love it. When i go back i will be shutting my mouth and keeping my head down because i do not want to ruin the experience.

It is unsafe to be Jewish here. Good friends have been cruel. Strangers are terrifying. I wont ever tell people Im Jewish if they dont already know because im so worried they will hate me.

I wanted to go to university, but the university i want to go to doesnt seem all that safe for me as a Jew anymore.

Ive lost countless friends since Oct 7.

To answer the askers question of "is anyone standing up for your community", no. Theyre doing the opposite. Heck even our own community turns on us (see: the book jewish not zionist, written by a member of my local Jewish community, who says Jews arent oppressed in Aotearoa). I think I know one or two people who arent Jewish who are standing up for us and standing with us at this time.

Also, in my town theres a big event in the city for Hannukah each year. I dont know if it happened last year, because i wasnt in town, but im worried about it this year. Its an event that i love so much. One of the few chances to meet other Jewish people in the area that dont go to the same synagogue. There is always a large police presence around, and i fear this year it will be worse. Hell im willing to bet there will be protests about it! Im worried it wont even happen. I hope it does and i pray we will all be safe, because its such a great event that i look forward to all year.

I would invite my best friend to come along as its a tradition for my family that we bring friends to share our culture with them, but my best friend is so loudly anti-zionist that if she agreed to come (i doubt she would) she would definitely cause issues. I imagine if theres protests shell be on that side.

It fucking sucks to be Jewish right now. Honestly it always has, ive never felt safe as a Jewish person in Aotearoa, but its so much worse now. We are lucky compared to other places, but its still not good.

Sorry for the long rant of a reblog btw, OP. Kinda just wanted to vent my experience since I dont think theres many other Jewish people from Aotearoa on this hellsite.

how bad is it to be jewish in NZ right now? is anyone standing up for your community? where i am antisemitism has gotten pretty bad and it feels like almost no one other than jews or ppl who are part jewish or married to jews is calling it out.

Per data from the community security group, post oct 7th to March, antisemitism increased 600%.

And this is only reported incidents.

There are not really anyone besides jews standing up for us.

The holocaust centre is getting involved with antisemitism at a university just for the sheer fucking amount of it. Leftist circles are practically rife with it.

I'd consider my ex friends to be your average leftist, like not far left but almost there. And they're super antisemitic. Celebrating the Amsterdam pogrom, calling hamas a resistance group, supporting the houthi etc.

The only support I've seen outside of jewish circles is a coworker tearing down antisemitic pro Palestine posters near our office. Like these weren't regular posters, they were antisemitic instead of being just pro Palestine

[sneakydraws]

Well, here it is - a lengthy explanation of each card in my mdzs major arcana deck and what I meant to convey/what i would have changed in retrospect/what alternatives i considered! It’s a bit messy and my typing style is lazy but hopefully it will be an interesting read to some of you :)

And so you don’t say I didn’t warn you - jiang cheng’s section (11 justice) is absurdly long lmao

0 the fool  I elaborated on this in the post itself but yeah basically jin ling is kind of representative of all the damage and trauma caused by the past, and there’s a kind of danger there of him falling victim to the same vices as the older characters and repeating the same mistakes and perpetuating the cycle of war and misery (the cycle that we already see with how the jin sect became the new wen sect, and later with how jgy became the new wwx) and he has a lot of room to grow! He grows so much over the course of the novel, comes to realise the complexities of the past and gets a harsh life lesson in how nothing is as black and white as it seems. But ill save talking about his progress for the end, for now whats important is that he has room to grow and also a dog. I don’t really have a justification for the sun, i mostly just thought it looked sick? It made its way to the next card as well, where it makes a bit more sense, but then i realised it was a dumb motif to include 1 the magician I still very much like wwx for the role, and that illustration would have probably had him raising a corpse on his left and pointing threateningly to the sun on his right. I considered including the table as well, with some mdzs relevant items replacing the card suits. Anyway, like i said wwx got a few cards to himself already so i went with the alternative wq design, since i think she fits the card as well. Both she and wwx are highly skilled people, extremely driven once they set their mind to something. The card to me symbolises the creative mind as well as a general drive for action, which fits them both - wwx was famously a prolific inventor, and wq came up with a previously unheard of surgery, after all. This card strays pretty far from the rider-waite deck design, largely because i was still figuring out how i wanted to approach this series, but you can still see the influence. 2 the high priestess I was actually going to skip this card at first because I couldn’t think of a fitting character, but once i considered a qings character post death, it all fit pretty well. She was already a highly intuitive person in life, and in sharing her memories with wwx she is, in a way, relaying a kind of secret knowledge. Anyway she’s one of my fav characters so im glad i got a chance to include her. The coffins could be interpreted to be xxc and sl or xxc and xy 3 the empress Theres other mother figures in mdzs who got to be mothers for a longer time, but jyl definitely embodies the positive aspects of this card the best. She’s nurturing, kind, emotionally supportive, she already mothered wwx and jc quite a bit when she was young. Plus i liked that the rw card had both water and flowers, making an easy lotus connection. In retrospect the stars look kind of out of place and i should have replaced them with something more relevant... Also, i should have had her hold a lotus seed pod instead of a flower, haha 4 the emperor Like i said I considered jc for the role but hoching bullied me into admitting that nmj was better… they’re both more of an inverted emperor than an upright one but then again theres hardly any character in mdzs who would fit upright emperor so. Jgs was also considered but he’s even uglier than nmj so i couldn’t bear to draw him 5 the hierophant It was pointed out to me that lqr would have fit this card better and the truth if that statement haunts me to this day. Unfortunately I have no space in my brain for lqr so lxc got the role instead. My main reason was his role during the wen destruction of gusu lan, when he ran away with the contents of the library - this is why there’s bookshelves behind him. The keys, take, from the rider-waite deck, are meant to represent the gusu pendants that allow you to enter 6 the lovers Im sure many people would have chosen wangxian here but I uhh don’t really care abt wangxian personally? And also their love story is so convoluted that jyl and jzx seem idyllic by comparison lol. Also i didnt really have an idea for who to put in the angel’s place for wangxian… mme jin certainly did not get these two together in the end but undeniably she and mme yu did initially give them a chance to fall for each other so. Thats something i guess. Anyway the trees became their sects’ flowers and the mountain became the burial grounds - an omen of their tragic fate, basically 7 the chariot There might have been other characters who fit this card better but i couldn’t really think of another card for lwj and i thought it would be weird to not include him… anyway i don’t really care for current timeline lwj BUT i do like that he was clearly influenced by wwx to walk his own path in life based on his moral convictions rather than follow his sect’s rules blindly. The chariot is to me a card of self control, self determination and focused action, so it seemed fitting. The composition felt kind of empty without the actual chariot so i padded it out with the guqin, the cloud recess in the bg (it doesn’t look great but i tried to replicate the drama design….) and the bunnies which conveniently fit the colour scheme of the sphinxes in the rider-waite design 8 strength Like i said before, my interpretation of this card is more… morally ambiguous than the quote unquote official meaning, so i thought about manipulative or duplicitous characters more than kind characters whose strength is expressed through gentleness (though i did consider jyl briefly for the latter interpretation). As such, i considered both jgy and nhs, but ended up going with jgy largely because i couldn’t pass up the opportunity to put the nie sect’s beast as the lion. 9 the hermit My thoughts immediately went to bssr lol. It may be an overly literal interpretation but whatever, i like it just fine. And i like that i managed to echo the rider-waite silhouette in the mountain and the tree (and even in bssr herself) 10 wheel of fortune God i love the parallels between these 2… this card to me is about how you cant trust your current situation, good or bad, to last forever, and these 2 embody that perfectly imo. Wwx went from son of a well off servant and a powerful cultivator, to street rat orphan, to adopted son of sect leader jiang, to double orphan, to MIA, to terrifying but admired warrior, to terrifying and despised traitor, to dead, to, at the very end, suddenly respected and trusted again. The dishonesty and cheapness of whatever the public’s current opinion of him is is portrayed beautifully as far as im concerned. And jgy of course claws his way up to power only to instantaneously become public enemy number one, to the point that he’s probably blamed for stuff there’s no reason to believe he had a hand in. Wei wuxian’s silent astonishment at how quickly the cultivation world turns against jgy and towards him again is a delicious moment of thematic resonance.  11 justice I settled on this card for jc after he got booted from the emperor seat but i do think it fits, in a somewhat convoluted way. I turned both the sword and the scales into visual representations of the golden core transfer (can you tell im obsessed with it). According to biddy tarot, the justice card is partly about searching for the truth, and the scene where jc finds out about the transfer is of course a big deal. I was also very influenced by the reversed meaning again - which is about being reluctant or unwilling to face or accept the consequences of your actions. I feel on an intuitive level that this fits jc but I’m not sure how well i can explain it - it’s something about how he’s a little too comfortable scapegoating wwx for things that were also, if much less so, influenced by his actions, and also something about the way he keeps wwx at an arm’s length emotionally but still leans on him and accepts his support when he really needs it, and somewhat hypocritically expects wwx to put the needs of him and the jiang sect before the needs of others. And also something about the core exchange is the consequence and proof of wwx’s deep - terrifyingly deep, even - love and care for him, which is something jc doesn’t seem to let himself acknowledge. Maybe even something about how you could argue that the way all of the jiangs acted around wwx - jfm’s favouritism that left him with the feeling of a debt he needs to repay, mme yus insistence that he be a servant more than a brother to jc, prepared to give his life for jc, and jc’s own unwillingness - or inability, he was a child after all - to clearly acknowledge wwx as an equal to himself, enabling wwx’s self sacrificial and protective tendencies - that all of this was what caused wwx’s complete and unquestioning willingness to do whatever it took to protect jc, and therefore paved the way to the golden core transfer. And i don’t mean this to be scapegoating jc - especially considering how young he was when this all went down, it wouldn’t be fair to expect this level of emotional perceptiveness, awareness and maturity of him - but i think adult jc has to grapple with the fact that the chain of cause and effect was not as simple as wwx fucking everyone’s lives up to be a martyr, and that both jc and his parents had a role in that story as well. I don’t even necessarily think this is something that jc only realised in the current timeline - i think it’s something he felt on some level this whole time, and it probably led to a lot of feelings of guilt - but the suibian reveal definitely puts it in sharp focus, and i think he’s now better equipped to handle this introspection than he was as a recently orphaned, traumatised teenager, lol. ANYWAY the window with the fabric is both a nod to the rider-waite design and a reference to the destruction of lanling - i actually did some basic ass research for this, and it seems that in ancient china fabric would indeed be hanged in a window if the normally used paper was damaged. The design of the window, as well as the very idea to use it to imply the reconstruction of lanling, was taken from this great piece of jc angst by my pal moroll1! Oh yeah also the covered window kind of works as a denial of forgiveness for jc because it’s like a halo but covered up... Also I completely forgot to put a blindfold over his eyes which would be perfectttt because blind justice and the core exchange......... ok moving on 12 the hanged man I always have issues with this card because i cant find a satisfactory summary of what it’s really about. Best i can tell it symbolises a need to hit pause, surrender or let go of something… ive also seen it tied to sacrifice? So mo xuanyu doesn’t fit perfectly, but sacrifice is definitely there in a surface level reading kind of way, and the idea that you have to surrender or let go in order to achieve your goal does fit the whole deal of getting revenge but giving up your life in exchange and not being there to see it 13 death This is probably one of my favourite cards, definitely not because I have huge issues with change or anything…. I see this card as signalling the necessity of change or putting an end to something / leaving something in the past in order to start anew? At first i considered putting past wwx, mxy and current wwx here as a kind of transformation and one cycle flowing into the next... But firstly, I’d already used mxy in the very previous card, so putting him in again would feel like overkill, and secondly, the longer I thought about it the less convinced I was that this would even fit with the card’s meaning? Because coming back from the dead doesn’t like... trigger an internal transformation within wwx or anything? Anyway, fun fact: the design I ended up going with was actually originally intended for judgement! I thought I was being very clever with the whole “figure plays an instrument and the dead rise” parallel, but apparently I’d just completely forgotten that the judgement card had a completely different composition... Truly I was boo boo the fool... But yeah anyway at the end of the day I figured the design would kind of work for death as well, with Wen Ning and the theme of transformation, (since in his case coming back as a fierce corpse does actually mark a certain transformation in behaviour) and Wei Wuxian’s protection of the Wen people essentially signifying an attempt to break the cycle of oppression if that makes any sense? Like, wwx is trying to revolutionise the way the world works a bit, if you catch my drift 14 temperance  The centrist card! Again this is probably going off track from the “official” interpretation, but to me this card has a certain “don’t commit fully; do everything in moderation; don’t take either side” flavour to it that i personally find infuriating irl and that i very much assign to lxc. It’s entirely possible that I’m misinterpreting his character because i didn’t really pay him (and the 3zun in general) much mind while reading, but hell, I’m allowed to pick favourites and choose who i want to interpret deeply vs shallowly. Again, i wish id chosen lqr for hierophant because its so annoying for a character i don’t care about to get two cards…. But oh well 15 the devil My alternative idea for this was jgy as the devil and lxc plus nmj as the figures, but since all three had been featured already (multiple times, even!) i figured I’d go with xy instead, especially since he’s among my faves lol. I think the devil signifies something along the lines of unhealthy attachment, obsession or addiction, which isn’t 100% accurate in the case of xxc and a-qing, but if i stretch it a bit to cover toxic relationships in general, and especially manipulation or negative influence, i don’t think it’s half bad. My main struggle here was to choose who amongst the xxc/sl/aq trio to choose for the human figures. 16 the tower Arguably jin zixuans death and the following massacre of nightless city were the final and most direct reason for the siege of burial mounds, and the tiger seal is good shorthand for wwx’s loss of control over his powers, which led to the deaths of jzx and jyl. When reimagining major arcana i like to feature some kind of building in this card (spoilers for a possible future project but in my rose of versailles major arcana set the tower is bastille) and even if it’s not a tower, the image of wwx looming over the gathered crowd from atop a rooftop is so good i couldn’t resist 17 the star Struggled with this one - considered both jin ling and lsz for it, as symbolising a hope for the future, but that was kind of covered by the world so it wouldn’t make sense to include here as well... As usual when I struggle with interpreting a card (as opposed to understanding it but struggling with matching a character to it, like with death or moon) I went to biddy tarot and read all the details about its meaning. What i got was that this card signifies an incoming period of introspection and inner peace following a time of turmoil, as well as a general moving on into a new, better phase of one’s life or finding new meaning and purpose. The figure also suggests someone vulnerable, but possessing a keen sense of intuition as well as a good degree of practicality and common sense. Given all those, I settled for mianmian because IM LOVE HER..... I also kind of see her as a prelude to the “just one person is enough” theme present in tgcf!! And i think her decision to abandon her sect because she saw the toxicity and corruption in it is a very inspiring action - even if it didn’t make a large visible impact, i think the appearance of her and her idyllic family at the very end of the novel - paralleling and mirroring wangxian - implies that at the end of the day, it was a meaningful one 18 the moon Another card i ALWAYS fuxking struggle with - this time less because i can’t grasp its meaning and more because I can never find a character that fits it well. I usually get fixated on the “dreams and subconscious” part, but if i lean more on the “disguise, deceit, anxiety and fear” part, i eventually figured the whole yi city arc wouldn’t be a bad fit. I say the entire arc because it really does encompass all those themes if you include both the past and the present - xue yang’s disguise, his tricks with the villagers, a-qing’s lies and even xxc’s reluctance to talk about his past as well as xue yang pretending to be xxc all fit the disguise and deceit angle, and the general mystery and creepiness of the current timeline yi city work well with the anxiety and fear - the mist, the slow uncovering of the past, even a-qing being revealed to be an ally after scaring the shit out of the protags. I definitely struggled with including all the elements and characters, and even moreso with making them vaguely fit the rider-waite composition, but i think it ended up okay ish. OH and i completely forgot to draw mist swirling around them :( 19 the sun I was considering mianmian’s family for this one, but since I used her for star, I ended up with wwx and his parents instead. Once again I’m reinterpreting the card a bit - normally I think it symbolises incoming times of pure happiness and abundance, as well as a connection with the inner child, but I gave it more of a nostalgic or sentimental twist - wwx looking back at the brief glimpse of his happy childhood. 20 judgement another card that i struggle to interpret a bit... Here i actually used the tgcf tarot zine as a reference! In it judgement is summarised as “rebirth, following duty, absolution” SO i figured that nhs, mxy and wwx all together would fit pretty neatly... wwx achieving (public) absolution through clearing his own name after being reborn, and nhs sort of calling on wwx to expose jgy’s crimes... It’s a bit messy but not bad I think! 21 the world This ties very closely to my read on mdzs as a story - which is that it’s, at the end of the day, largely about cycles, and about how hard it is to break them, but how we gotta keep trying and have hope anyway. Or maybe more precisely, that the people directly involved with and influenced by the trauma of the past might not be able to get over said trauma and that the hope for healing from it will be shouldered by the new generation. Or something like that… Basically what i mean is that jc and wwx and lwj and lxc and nhs and jgy and all these people who were in the thick of the sunshot campaign and the siege are so profoundly affected by it that it genuinely feels by the end of the story like there is little hope for them to ever truly overcome that trauma and build a better future without repeating the same old mistakes - but there is a glimmer of hope in the new generation, specifically in jl and lsz. And it’s a bit paradoxical, because they have also been directly impacted by the past tragedies - lsz having his entire clan wiped out after wwx failed to protect them, jl losing both his parents to wwx’s mistakes - but despite that loss, and despite coming from arguably the two opposing sides of the past conflicts, they are both, in the end, capable of moving past that tragedy, of recognising the complicated nature of those conflicts (jl’s moment of clarity at the end is both heartbreaking and hopeful) and forging friendships between clans in the process. I honestly think that the extra where jl is struggling to assert his authority as sect leader, to treat his subjects well and to cooperate with other sects in a truly amicable way is the single hopeful ending note for the larger themes of the novel - it allows us to imagine that maybe these kids can learn from the mistakes of their elders rather than getting sucked in by resentment at those mistakes, and actually build a brighter future for the cultivation world. And sidenote, this is also why i have a soft spot for jin ling and lan sizhui as a ship... speaking of which their poses were directly referenced from the lovers card ehehe

Looking back, I’d like to add some symbol of jin ling’s trauma so that it mirrors baby wen yuan in the tree stump... maybe his father’s sword? 

[letthefrogsbe]

remember when I was gonna write that parkner fic?

cool so I've decided I'm gonna, but because I cannot write for SHIT and I hate my writing every time I see it, ill just share my outline of what I have so far. its not coherent. sorry. 

Section one: aunt may dies. It’ll be like “it's been 3 months. 3 months since May was shot. 2 months and 3 weeks since she died.”

Something like that idc. Basically this section will base around peter living tony, because he’s not doing well, and he is only 17- which is not actually old enough to be on your own after something like this. Setting is established, with cameos from dr strange (who tony is dating and lives with (yeah bite me, this is my fanfiction i can make it what i want.) it will be made obvious that this takes place after endgame, which also means that tony is Not going to die. I’m not that mean lmao. The avengers are like largely together, there was not as much death in this as there was in endgame. Whatever. Everyone is very nice to peter because they know that for him its either this or him becoming a ward of the state so like.

Section two: harley gets kicked out. His mom finds out that he’s gay (from gossip sources idk) and kicks harley out. Im not going to write them having a big fight like in the moment, but harley will recount what happened somewhat to tony in this section, and then more to peter later in the story. Gay ppl trauma dump, we know this. Okay anywaysss so harley calls tony literally sobbing and like freezing fucking cold. IM SORRY IM BEING SO MEAN TO THEM I PROMISE THEY'LL GET A HAPPY ENDING. Okay. harley explains how his mom kicked him out. Tony asks why, harley says something like “she didn’t agree with my lifestyle choices” like bitterly. Tony is a good person in this (i know, im really taking some character liberties) and he’s in the mood for collecting strays apparently, so he has happy send over the quinjet. He can’t make it himself bc hes in fucking japan or something for the next few weeks,, but. Yeah! Tony also calls peter, who is presumably in bed and feeling depressed. “Hey pete. How ya feeling? Any better?’ ‘Not really, tony. Sorry.’ ‘you don’t have to be sorry-’ ‘damn tony you sound like my therapist.’ “sorry pete, but i do have something to tell you- you know harley?’ ‘only from what you’ve told me about him, but yea. He was the tennessee garage kid, right?’ ‘i mean. Yes. so- he’s gonna come stay with me for a while too- it might not be permanent but it will probably be a bit. He’s about your age, and he just has no where to go (just like u). He’s not going to stay in your room or anything, but with bruce and thor here, he will be in your apartment area.’ ‘okay tony.. Will i have to talk to him a bunch?’ ‘not if you don’t want to- i already warned him about you, so it should be okay. I wouldn’t worry so much pete- you guys are so similar in a lot of ways that i wanted to introduce you two long before he called me.’ ‘okay tony, i trust you. Thank you again for letting me stay with you :)’ (yeah that kind of got away from me)

Section 3: build up. this is a shorter section. Harley and peter are gonna meet in section 4. This section is harley’s jet ride (with an intuitive happy) and harley’s nerves about how he really isn’t worth this (i mean hes pretty intimidated tony sent a private jet just for him) and happy like reassures him. Hes still insecure though. Peter is also nervous bc what if harley doesn’t like him? What if he doesn’t like harley?? Tony did say they would get along, but peter hasn’t really been himself recently, so who knows? Yeah lots of that. I do want to emphasize though- peter is not completely unhealthily coping. Like he has a therapist and he has been reaching out to ned and mj, but its still an open wound for him. Obviously. He still has a sense of humor though, but its to cover these deep insecurities. Like the first month or so that he was with tony, he was reallllyyyy trying to not get close to him bc he sort of thinks he kills everyone around him. Like logically he knows this isn’t true, but he does really think the that non superheroes that he surrounds himself with are very at risk if they know about his spider-man-ness. The only people who know now are ned and mj (may knew too).

Section 4: the meeting of harley and peter. Keep in mind peter has been living in this apartment/area of stark tower for about 3 months now. He actually moved in while may was in the hospital because he couldn’t stand to be alone in the apartment when he knew why may wasn’t there. And um. Yeah. so peter is like comfortable in this space, basically. Also- the reason theyre in the same apartment is because stark tower was not really created with the idea of housing broken orphans in mind, so it only has a certain amount of residential space. Thor and bruce are currently staying there together (although no one really knows if theyre together, or if theyre just best bros who went through some extreme trauma together and are now inseparable. Hmmm wonder if thats gonna come up later) and theyre using one apartment, and happy lives there with his own apartment, and tony and stephen are currently sharing the penthouse, even though thats not public knowledge. Really only the people close to tony know that he’s dating stephen. So. this leaves just the one other 2 bedroom apartment for peter and harley. It has one bathroom, and the bedrooms are connected by a door but theyre pretty big so like. Theres a kitchen, a living room with a fancy ass tv, and a really pretty view (with a balcony bc <333). May died in march, peter got leave from the school in april, and it is now the middle of june btw. Tony is now peter’s official guardian (he was before may died anyways) and now has sole guardianship over him which he has fully accepted, even though peter and him both know that there are going to be times where he has to go out of town bc he does own a company after all. Times like right now. Harley is pretty nervous that tony isn’t going to be there to greet him and that he is going to have to like introduce himself to peter and everything. Cmon, theres no reason to feel like that, he’s the one intruding after all, he should at least be able to handle himself. (<--- harley’s thoughts). Yeah so theyre insecure super cool. A n y w a y s so peter was stressing about harley as he arrived, and so when harley walked in they were both complete bundles of nerves. Harley walks up but knocks. Peter actually jumps (bc spidey sense okay whatever) and goes to get the door. Oh my god these awkward teenagers i hate them so much (i love them). Peter kinda looks like shit, sorry king. He was a little bit crying earlier, then tony called and he switched into stressed out ball-of-anxiety mode. Distractions are good, its okay. Peter opens the door for harley and they like introduce each other all awkward (again sorry) and peter shows harley where he is staying. Harley doesnt really have muchhhh bc he was kicked out and all. He just has a suitcase full of clothes, his favorite blanket, his favorite stuffed animal (yeah whatever bc ofc he does) and his phone/charger. He sets all his stuff down at once. He thanks peter for letting him stay in his apartment and also said sorry. First thing peter noticed was harley’s accent. Stfu. peter asks why harley’s here- ok. Harleys had a long ass day. Too fucking long. He- he breaks down. He tells peter a lot. About how his mom found out that he was gay, and how she told him never to come back. Yikes. Anyways, this is establishing the beginning of their relationship as friends. Peter is there for him even though he doesn’t know him at all. Peter sees some of himself in harley in this moment, even though he’s not talking about himself yet. Eventually harley does ask about peter, and they really just get to know each other really quick. They have these deep scarring individual traumas, and neither has nearly recovered, but they find comfort in just knowing that theyre not alone in their suffering. At least for now. At least in this moment.

Section 5: the next day. Peter and harley spent that whole night talking about what they were going through. Peter said good night at around 5 am (there were no adults around they can do what they want to) and they both got good sleeps. In peter’s case, one of the first solid nights he’s had in a while. Harley was kept up a little longer after peter left, however, because he just couldn’t shut off his mind. It was really cathartic for him to just lay everything out there and for someone to just accept him. Peter told him he was bi, but he was.. Lucky. He had accepting people in his life. May was accepting. God, harley couldn’t fathom having lost everyone in his life, everyone he ever cared about, and still having the heart to sit and talk with the dumbass anxious gay kid who can’t go home anymore. His problems felt so small compared to peter’s, and all he could do was admire peter’s resilience and how he was seemingly able to bounce back from anything. God, peter was something. He couldn’t wait to get to know him more. With that thought circling in his head, he finally went to sleep at oh shit 6:30 am. Peter woke up around 1. Harley at 2. When harley woke up, peter was watching tv and eating cereal on the couch and he just sat down next to him. No words, just sleepy children being sleepy. They stayed like this for like an hour when someone knocked on their door. Enter stephen strange!!!!!!!!!!! Get excited people. Hes just coming in to check on them bc tony told him to, and he didn’t get the chance last night bc he was _busy_. K so now he’s here and hes awkward and he just wants to make sure these boys r okay bc theyve both been through too much recently, and it would be just the cherry on top if they didn’t get along. Him and harley had never actually met before so he like introduced himself and all that. Offered like if they needed anything he was there, and its only gonna be a few days until tony gets back (did i say a week earlier? Im retconning that bc i cannot find it in my writing so it is now retconned). Peter and harley just have to sort of explain to dr strange that theyre getting along gREAT and there is no need for concern….. And peter was even thinking about showing harley around the city a bit that night (something he had not yet told harley, but wanted to make it seem like he was doing well and not acting too depressed in front of Dr. Strange) so dr strange is like yeah !!!!!! do that, that sounds super fun petey !!!!!! and so now they have evening plans

ok ps I wrote this like 2 weeks ago and completely forgot I posted something on Tumblr about this fic idea, and so this is literally just how I talk to myself. was not gonna ever post this but then I decided to because I'm bored. there are more sections but I'm not gonna post them rn because this post is really fucking long already!!!!

[toxicsamruby]

1/7 MM okay gotcha gotcha. I was thinking about this on a smaller scale, where i don't think discussing racism in supernatural should be "fun and interesting" (phrase you used in your original post that rubbed me the wrong way b/c [hot take] I don't think racist tropes reminiscent of the Birth of a Nation and the policing of poor black communities are fun and interesting. they're horrible. but, like you said, we shouldn't shy away from horrible things), but no yeah i get what you're saying about

2/7 people showing the same enthusiasm, willing participation, and depth when talking about this stuff as w/gender&sexuality. I agree with that AND it's important to keep in mind, especially with a fanbase that's largely white, whom these analyses are for and who is writing them (b/c a white person's racial reading isn't the same as a bipoc's). But, again, that's on the smaller scale, which appears to have more to do with personal accountability and discussion norms.

3/7 AND i also get what you're saying about using the entirety of supernatural to examine "american attitudes about the Other" and how that needs to be broken down in ethnic/racial/culture identities just as it is with queer indentities and yes i agree. as for the marketing/monetary engagement thing, i may have been speaking out of turn there because i don't know a ton about marketing or audience appeal and i also wasn't invested in all the spn meta/BTS stuff until recently.

4/7 what I said was purely my observations of the very specific 'spn renaissance' tumblr circle, which appeared different from the, say, twitter circles that pay for merch and whatnot (again, this may not be accurate, it's just from what i've seen). HOWEVER, that being said, if we're speaking specifically about the long-term, /larger/ cultural impact supernatural has, I 100% agree that it needs to be recognized and condemned as a racist and all-around patriarchal show. I did forget that spn made

5/7 so many headlines about both queerbaiting and having a queer character or whatever, and the same headlines need to be made about how it treats bipoc and other minorities. Although supernatural is a mess and considered cringey and a dead horse, it still holds a significant amount of power and (at least some) reputability in media. and this is all despite its misogyny and homophobia and cisheteronormativity (this is the case for so many shows, not just spn). I guess i was just concerned about

6/7 'ok, what if mainstream starts having these conversations about racism very specifically in a way that normalizes it and makes it seem hatecrime-but we'll-allow-it,' so now we have this monster of a show that KNOWS it's racist but doesn't really care. But it's equally as terrible to not point it out. But it doesn't matter anyways, because the show is over now, and it's not like they're gonna give reparations to the actors they killed and the people they hurt. your point about us having these

7/7 conversations (in a way that does not make it seem like like fun ideas to ponder over) being the only thing we CAN do to lessen the power the White Narrative of Supernatural (both meta and in-text) really resonates, and i hadn't thought of that but i totally agree. in other words lmao, fuck this show

yeah “fun” might’ve been the wrong word choice for all the reasons u gave i really didn’t mean to trivialize racism as a discussion and i see what u mean especially w how people have responded to the homophobia of supernatural me included like saying oh its homophobic but its funny so it’s fine and ur absolutely right that we Cant allow the discussion of race to go the same way (and honestly ur intuition was right bc in the tags of that post theres white people saying we SHOULD take it as lightly as the homophobia). so yeah the phrasing was my bad

but my general point stands. like i personally find it really fulfilling and interesting to talk abt how supernatural (and other fiction) replicates these american ideas about the Other bc supernatural is a FASCINATING microcosm of american culture (and of course in part bc i Am an american other)! and that post was mostly in response to how white fans seem to shy away from these extremely complex and interesting conversations bc they consider discussion of racism a chore like something they Have to do so they can say “it was bad that they killed off kevin tran. see i engaged critically! now back to the meta that relates to Me and My experiences”

and of course the analysis that becomes generally accepted and talked abt by fans shapes the actual presence of the show in pop culture. so we should do our best to write good and thoughtful and compassionate analysis of EVERY aspect of the text, especially one so deeply embedded as the race element.

basically yeah ur right and i think we pretty much agree. fuck this show! thank you for sending me these messages by the way im glad we could talk this out :)

[dropoutparty]

ngc ramblings part 2- chapters 3 and 4

time for post 2 babeyy!! i didnt try to really be funny in this one like i did the last one, so i hope u dont mind!! heres a link to the first post if u missed it! ill make a masterpost of all the parts once im done with all the chapters. now lets get into trance and dementia!! (that sounds. hilarious out of context)

here we are at trance! the name of this one is pretty clear, but ill still go into the definition for the sake of clarity. basically, a trance is a state of half consciousness and an absence of response to external stimuli, like what you might experience when under deep hypnosis. this is probably referencing the “episodes” that melissa would go into where she would jsut kinda stare off into the distance and not emote all that much. the music here is compared to the videodrome theme, which probably means theres a consistent high note in the background, with the main attraction of the song being garbled electronic noises, maybe with some more coherent synth coming in at some point. either way, it probably is meant to make you feel uneasy because as we all know, high pitched noises are spooky.

the new kaiju this time around is orga (a kaiju with some mutated godzilla dna in it). this makes zach realize that this game couldnt be just some unreleased version of the normal one (as if fuckin red appearing didnt already make that clear) so he now figures that its a rom hack of some kind that his friend just happened to find. im glad he didnt just immediately go to assuming it was haunted because thats SUCH a common thing in these creepypastas and its so dumb?? good job cosby... anyways the first level zach goes into is also the first quiz level, where we finally meet face!!! my beloved,, i dont really know how to approach the quiz levels tbh? because on one hand i wanna examine face as a character all at once but on the other hand i wanna talk about them as i go... for this post ill leave all the quiz stuff out, but i wanna know if yall would want them included in the future! ill just make a separate post for all the quiz levels if you dont :3. overall though, the first quiz level gives me the feeling that face is assessing who and what zach is, maybe throwing random stuff in to make it not seem suspicious or something?

anyways, zach finishes the quiz level and moves onto a green temple level. zach describes the music of these levels as hypnotic, which might relate to the planet name? the only enemies in this level are dead things, specifically a ghost thing and a bat with a horse skull head, who probably killed the things that became the ghosts. already this world is a little different than pathos because it has buildings in it!! specifically, this world is filled with green temple levels, which i think translates in-game universe to two large temples and three smaller ones (based on how the levels are kinda clumped together, with single ones kinda spread out). outside of the temples are the same empty blue mountain stages that pathos had, but now with not-moguera hangin around! i feel like this further proves my idea i talked about in the last post, where not-moguera and not-gezora killed all the life on the planet together, because as far as is said the blue mountains are still empty here except for not-moguera. theres also some cave stages from pathos here, but not as many.

moving on, after zach gets through some stages its time for the bosses! first up is not-varan, whos sprite looks like its an altered version of varans actual sprite from the original game, just like the other not-kaijus so far. i think this is a theme among all of the nots here so ill just say when they dont look made up of the originals parts from now on. not-varan fights by kicking and shooting heat-seeking missiles. its head is backwards, so it cant see whats in front of it. i get the feeling that the missiles are heat-seeking in order to kill anything coming towards it that it cant see and the kicks are more of a desperation thing, like oh god my missiles didnt kill something and now its hurting me, i need to get away or something like that. so i guess i would describe its fighting style as defensive? anyways, moving on. next zach fights not-hedorah, who is the source of the horse-bats. this is the first one that doesnt seem to be made up of an original monsters parts, but it does have the same color scheme so theres that. not-hedorahs fighting is a lot more aggressive, summoning horse-bats to keep you distracted while he goes to town on you. i think a second not-moguera was put here to help not-hedorah kill everything, because i don't think not-varan would be very useful when it comes to doing that lmao. so after zach beats not-hedorah, no more horse-bats spawn which is neat! after beating not-hedorah, zach tries to enter the base level without beating orga but it doesnt work so i wont dwell on it.

orga is just a normal godzilla monster, so there isnt as much to say about him. i do think that orga was an original resident of trance before the not-kaiju came around to kill everything, like biollante was on pathos. he fights by punching, shooting a heat beam, and eating other monsters! i think this last one, even tho its a normal part of the kaiju, is here to foreshadow reds preferred method of killing things that we see later (especially since orga also unhinges his jaw to eat things). anyways this fight makes zach geek out and think that the game must have been made by a fellow person of culture and godzilla fan!! which is funny for reasons ill get into later. he doesnt have much time for a fanboy moment tho bc he has to run the mile again with coach red!

this time around, the game is trying to trip zach up by including some obstacles to avoid while you run from red. red doesnt have any issue with them though, theyre not meant to keep him away from you, after all.  zach was freaked out but he still has his epic gamer skillz so he beat the level just fine. when he was done he yelled in gamer delight before red looked at him like “shut the hell up” and zach almost pissed himself. and thats trance!! before i move onto dementia tho, i wanna talk about trance itself because of course i do. i think this planet used to be home to a lot of creatures like pathos was, but this society was more developed and spirituality was very important to them, hence all of the temples. i dont think it was a very somber or strict society though, mainly im getting that from the temple music having an “indian techno vibe” to, it. so from what i gather, this society was very spiritual but also they liked to party. while im on the subject of the temples, i think that face is hiding out in either like a small side building or a hidden room inside of one of the big green temples. trance probably used to be his home, and when everything started getting killed i think he hid out somewhere he would be safe. i dont know about yall, but the quiz levels always gave me the impression that they were indoors for some reason? so that definitely contributes to the hiding in a temple idea but i think it still works if you dont feel the same. i think thats all i really have to say about trance, so lets move on to dementia!

ok as usual, were starting out with the planets name: dementia. you know what dementia is but again, for the sake of clarity its basically a disorder caused by brain injury or disease that causes memory loss, personality changes, and impaired reasoning. im not entirely sure why dementia specifically was chosen here, and my best guess for what it could mean is that maybe its foreshadowing melissas condition? it doesnt really resemble dementia at all but thats my best guess lmao. anyways, this chapter starts out with zach still freaking out about red looking at him and wondering whats up with the game before we get our board description this time around. its during this little beginning part that he decides that he has to finish the game just to see what the hell is even going on with it, which like. fair. ok so the boards music is described as basically a slow piano cover of the original games saturn theme.

as will be the routine from now on, zach starts with the quiz level. the questions face asks this time around seem like hes trying to get to know more about zach at this point, though theres still the usual unrelated questions mixed in (though theres only like 4 of them this time)! for the last question he asks, face must have figured out that zach is a human because he offers him a new monster! zach obviously says yes pogs irl when he sees that face gave him anguirus, his second favorite godzilla monster (whats his favorite godzilla monster? is it godzilla? he hasnt mentioned a favorite monster yet so why bring up your second favorite? idk) and one that hes wanted to play as since he was a child, which is interesting (im sure youre sick of hearing this by now but, more on that later). ok now onto the levels.

the first kind of level is a palette swap of the blue mountains from the last two worlds, but this time theres also water! the music is “a very simple song with a lot of abrupt pauses, followed by a loud note every few seconds” so take from that what you will. this level doesnt have any enemies in it, just like the last two, but this time it looks like zachs goin for a swim bc were goin underwater babeyy!! the enemies in the water consisted of a piranha (which zach likes because he can “tell what it is” talk about a buzzkill) and a spiky bottom feeder thing whatever taht means. and that's it for that level type. kinda boring but the other two level types make up for it. speaking of, lets go onto the next level type! these levels actually have an in-game name for them; unforgiving cold. these levels are very long, taking place in a castle dungeon made of blue bricks, with statues of terrified faces lining the walls. these levels made zach really anxious, and the longer he played them the more he felt like he was getting close to something “unspeakably evil” yea sure dude. its now that he starts to suspect something supernatural is going on, because he thinks the game can make the player feel things at will, which imean he isnt wrong? also the music in these levels is just a looping choir that sounded familiar to zach for some reason. there werent any enemies (which im realizing is a running theme in this thing huh) so were onto the first boss, not-baragon.

not-baragon is another one that isnt made up of its originals parts, but still has the same color scheme. he fights with a really strong kick, ice breath, and pissing on you with a gatling gun dick. yes im being serious. like??? i didnt remember taht being a thing but oh my god just look at this shit.

comedy gold. you even do extra damage to him if you attack the gun like??? anyways zach beats not-baragon and goes on to the last level type, the arctic. the level is literally just an icy tundra with some water segments, and the music is compared to northern hemispheres from donkey kong country but 8bit? and zach described it as “dangerous sounding” so theres that. the enemies here consist of a thing that zach says kinda looks like not-gezora but without the eye (i can kinda see it? maybe) thats frozen in ice, a spike ball with legs that explodes and shoots spikes everywhere when it dies, and the piranhas from the green mountains. the last two are only in the water segments, because yea theres water segments and theyve got platforming babeyy!! at the end of the level, theres a mini boss fight with maguma (a walrus kaiju), who runs away when you beat him. thats all the levels, so we can get on to the rest of the bosses!

the next boss is manda, a sea dragon kaiju. he fights by spitting fire, biting, and constricting (also he switches things up if somethings not working, so hes a pretty smart cookie). during the fight the atragon (which is like an airship from one of the movies i think?) shows up to help, which zach thought was epic and poggers even tho it didnt help at all. and thats the manda fight, moving on! the next fight is weird, because nothing is there for a little while before a fish shows up, screams, and then gets fuckin kilt by not-gigan. once again, it doesnt resemble the original but it uses the same color palette. it fought with a blood beam it shot from its mouth and a slash, and zach described it as fast and unrelenting, so definitely a really aggressive mike wazowski lookin motherfucker. after zach beats him, he goes on to the last boss of dementia, spacegodzilla (i guess the people who make the kaiju were going through a creative block or something lmao). spacegodzilla looks like normal godzilla but hes blue now and hes got ice!! why tf is he called spacegodzilla!!! anyways hes also more strategic with his fighting pattern, making ice crystal spires taht charges up his special meter and also keeps you from reaching him. when you do get close to him, you participate in a funney big dinosaur slap fight until u win, pog!! now on a completely different note, big reds comin to town (aw shit. here we go again)

this time around the chase is mostly underwater (tho its blood now bc ooo spooky,, sometimes i forget that this story is supposed to be scary tbh) so red has to put his floaties on before he can follow zach. theres also landmines over pits and red reveals his weird tentacle hand mouth tongue before zach finally gets away and the chase is over. reds startin to get frustrated bro, he's tried to catch this fucker like 3 times now wadda hell!!! btw these chase sections are a lot less crazy than i thought they were like. huh. ig its more intense when you listen to a reading lol. anyways now its time to talk about dementia as a planet. i think the whole “the not-kaijus are killing all the stuff on these planets for red” still holds true, and i feel like it will continue to do that, so ill just briefly mention it from now on. this planet is all ice and water basically though, so i think they had a harder time doing it this time, hence why the underwater sections have more enemies and the only original kaiju here can stay underwater for protection. also, i think face followed zach to dementia from trance because he realized what zach was doing and wanted to help out, which is why he gave zach anguirus.

basically i picture dementia to be a planet thats mostly water with some land thrown in, and an old dilapidated castle in the center. i think the castle itself was probably destroyed by the not-kaijus (along with anything alive that might have been in it). i cant decide if i think spacegodzilla or manda would have lived there, so ill just say they both lived there as gay lovers or somehting. as for the statue faces, theyve appeared on trance and dementia so far, and theyll continue to appear throughout the pasta. basically, i think these represent melissa and/or her presence. like in the green temples on trance, i think that alludes to how melissa is kind of an “angel” or divine being later in the game, and in the blue castle i think they could represent how melissa is (supposedly, more on that later) being held in the game so she can be tortured forever (which is why they look fuckin terrified). i think thats all i have to say about dementia.

before i end the post i wanted to say something abt the planets names. in the first post, i said i would talk about the planets names significance all at once but i. completely forgot that while writing this one, so ill just do them as i go from now on!! basically what i think the significance of pathos’ name is could be multiple things. it could be referencing the sad state of the planet itself, it could be foreshadowing that playing this game is going to be a painful experience for zach, or it could be talking about the incident with melissa, and how that was a really painful experience for zach (i wouldnt be surprised if it gave zach ptsd honestly). so thats the end of the post babeyy!! next up is entropy and extus!

[argumentl]

The Freedom of Expression Ep 12 - After the  increase in drinking at home, Tamabukuro Sujitaro's local Chinese restaurant tv program is hugely popular.

K: Hi, this is Dir en grey's Kaoru, starting this episode of The Freedom of Expression. Joe san, Tasai san, welcome again...Well, how's it going recently? In these trying times?

J: Recently, I've been wearing a mask.

T: Right, your mask.

K: Um, just so i don't cause trouble around me today, Im gonna wear a mask, I thought i should.

T: The distance between us too...We're social distancing.

K: Yeah, kinda.

J: There's more space than usual.

K: So, how's it been?

J: Well, I've been doing radio, but in terms of interviews..its really dried up.

T: Ahh, me too.

J: Well, basically, artists, they're in a situation where live shows aren't happening, so there is no so-called promotion going on.

K: Thats right.

J: So, rather than meeting directly to talk, they are doing interviews by email, or such. I've been spending longer at home, so I've been watching movies, and stuff.

T, K: Yeah.

J: Watching erotic movies and stuff.

K, T: *laugh*

K: Thats just normal for you though, right?

T: Its the same.

J: Well, I havn't changed in that respect.

T: Well, Joe, you've been watching movies. But my kids are also having time off..

J: Oh right.

T: Im with them all day, so i have no time to watch movies.

J: You don't watch them at all?

K: *To J* 'You don't watch them?'??

T: I can't, I don't have time. I take the kids to the park in the morning, I make them run about 5 laps, at least try to wear them out a bit *K, J laugh*

J: You make your kids run?

T: Yeah, if I wear them out, Im thinking how much earlier I can get them to bed. Then I'll have one or two hours to myself.

J: Oh right.

T: And then I'll have an evening drink or something, I do get a break doing this show though, but today I brought some news about how this kind of situation is happening in the world right now.

K: Okay, go ahead.

T: Its really typical Tokyo Sports news, but with this increase in drinking at home, a certain food tv show is very popular...a tv show specializing in local Chinese restaurants. The TV show 'Machi chuuka de yarouze' on BS - TBS has become popular.

J: Local Chinese restaurants?

T: Do you know it?

J: No no, I don't have a tv at home, so I have no idea. But I personally love local Chinese restaurants. Generally, if I go to different areas, if there is a butcher, I'll buy a pork cutlet and eat it straight away, if there is a local Chinese restaurant I'll have fried rice there...its how I test out new areas. 

T: What about you Kaoru, do you like local Chinese restaurants?

K: I love them. I also watch that show a lot. *the others laugh*

J: What type of show is it?

K: Well..they just go to these restaurants, drink beer, pick something to eat, and ???*1

J: Just that?

T: They eat stuff like fried rice, gyoza/dumplings, ??*2, and drink beer.

J: I see.

T: And its like people at home can watch it and drink beer too, its popular.

J: I see. By the way, Kaoru, when you go to local Chinese restaurants, what do you order? Your must have order?

K: Hmm, Liver and chives or..

J: Ohh yes.

T: Yeah, I like that.

J: Thats a good one.

T: How about gyouza?

K: Yeah, gyouza too.

T: And fried rice.

J: Fried rice is my...its my best way to really test out the skill of the restaurant, whether they are cooking properly...its fried rice.

K: But I always eat too much.

J: Yeah, yeah. Its best if you share it with a group*3, but if you are by yourself, and having beer, the calories stack up.

K: They do.

T: After we introduced this topic, Tokyo Sports' Twitter was abuzz with comments from all over the country saying, 'I love this too!'. It really seems like everyone loves these kinds of restaurants.

J: Ahh, really? But recently, it seems like they are starting to disappear a bit. There's this so-called 'successor problem', and especially in the city, and with the run up to the Olympics too, a lot of these places which make me say, 'Ahh, I like this', are disappearing. Its like, 'Oh, that place has gone?! I liked thier daily specials!'. To me, Japan's local chinese restaurants are..???*4

T: But also a lot of places can't open because of Corona.

K: Some are starting to do take-out outside,  right?

J: Yeh, they are.

T: Even with that, its tough for them though. I wish people would go to them *5

J: Yeahh. Don't they have those old style tables with the thin legs? With that, and a beer, and the tv..its a nice image.

T: Its like its unchanged from a long time ago.

J: It is.

K: I also like chinese noodes/soba.

J: Ah, yeah.

T: Those are good.

K: I feel like drinking beer now.

J: Should we do a Freedom of Expression special while having a drink sometime?

K: We should.

T: That would be good.

J: Lets do it sometime.

K: It should be fine. Drinking on air is not banned, right?

J: No, its fine.

T: What do you drink Kaoru? Gari..

K: Gari chuhai (Chuhai with pickled ginger)

J: Gari chuhai?

T: I wanna drink that.

K: Should we do it?

J: Lets do it! Yeah, lets. Everyone's doing online drinking parties now, right?

T: That sounds good.

K: Oh, they are, yeah.

T: There are like zoom drinking parties, using that app.

K: Wouldn't that be interesting?

T: I wonder.

K: There are a lot of people saying its fun, right? Cause they can't really talk properly otherwise.

J: Ahh, probably. There are a lot of days when I don't talk at all, except for if the supermarket staff asks me if I want a bag, and I say , 'No thank you'. Then I think, 'Ah, the only thing I said today was "No thank you"!'. There are days like that aren't there?

K: There are.

J: There are, aren't there?! Kaoru, you must have days when you are working, where you don't speak at all?

K: Yeah, I don't talk at all. I communicate with the members but its all by text..like on Skype's  chatroom or something. I don't use my voice at all.

J: Really?

K: The only voice is from the track im listening to.

J: Don't you ever have the desire to talk?

K: Hmm, you can be more matter-of-fact with text rather than speaking.

J: Well, yes.

K: When you speak..for example, it can sound as if you're speaking with emotion, can't it?

J: Yeah, you attach an intonation to it.

K: Like, 'Hmm, its a bit...' or, 'Yeah, its good...'...Somehow communicating on Line is more...like 'He should talk first', or..

J: I see.

K: If you hear thier voice, you think, 'Oh, he likes it', or 'He hates it'...you attach extra meanings..

J, T: I see.

K: So to avoid that, reading text is better.

J: So generally, the members always communicate by text?

K: Yes. Always like this, using chat.

T: When do you speak then?

K: We don't speak. *the others laugh*

J: You're a band who never speaks.

K: We don't. In our dressing rooms and such, we really don't talk. *others laughing* Really.

J: So when you are on tour, you don't talk about stuff with the members?

K: Really, with our drummer, these past twenty or so years, the amount I've talked with him woudn't fill a day. *others laugh*

J: If you compressed it all together, right? Only about 24 hours?

K: Yeah, yeah.

J: Thats amazing.

T: The Dir en grey members should all go out to a chinese restaurant together.

K: That sounds good.

T: What kind of scene would that be?!

J: I wanna see that!

T: Me too!

J: We need a members' chinese restaurant drinking party someday.

T: That would be great.

J: Tokyo Sports could cover it.

T: Really?

J: An exclusive.

T: Yeah, an exclusive.

J: Wouldn't it be?

K: Well, we've no idea what will happen.

J: True.

K: But there's a possibility.

T: For sure.

J: Well, its an option.

Kami: Um..

J: Oh, its Kami!

Kami: Theres a great little chinese restaurant in Roppongi.

J: Eh? Do you know Roppongi well, Kami?

Kami: Yeah, I do.

J: Whats the place, can you say the name?

Kami: The name...what was it again, I forgot.

J: You forgot?

K: *laughs*

J: He comes in with this, and forgets?

Kami: Um, what makes it great is that its really quick.

J, K: Ahh.

K: Chinese food is good if it comes quickly.

T: Yeah, for sure.

Kami: Its really quick.

T: How quick?

Kami: I timed it.

T: You timed it?!

Kami: The food came out in two mins.

J: What did you order?

Kami: Liver and chives came out in two mins.

J, T: Two mins!

K: Thats quick!

J: It might have been something they had already made in advance?

Kami: No, it was hot, it was really delicious.

J: How much was it?

Kami: The price was cheap too.

T: By the way, what do you like to drink with chinese food?

Kami: Alcohol? Beer.

J: Of course, with chinese food, its beer, right?

Kami: I like gyouza with beer.

T: Gyoyza with beer.

K: Ahh

J: The most basic of basics.

T: So, in this tv show, there's this guy called Tamabukuro. He has a saying that the size of a  large beer, 633mls, should be compulsory education for adults.

J: I see. Well, everyone, please..chinese food..

K: If there's anyone who wants us to go to thier restaurant...

J: Oh, yes! Lets make an appeal!

T: Lets do it! It will be fun.

J: Well, if there's anyone interested, please contact us here *points to bottom of screen*

To any restaurant owners out there.

K: Yes, please....Well, for now..

J: Oh, we're finishing?

K: Shall we finish here?

J: Yeah, cause we're wearing masks, keeping my glasses free of fog is..

K: They are fogging up a bit.

J: They do. Why don't you guys' glasses fog up? Do you use anti-fog?

K: You have to put your mask up, and your glasses on top of it.

J: Oh, is that it? *adjusts glasses*  Like this? Don't I look stupid like this?

K: Well...

J: Is this ok? If I put the mask up..

K: Yeah, thats too far up. *laughs*

J: We don't wear a mask a home though, right?

K, T: No, we don't.

J: Im not that used to it.

K: Oh, indoors?

J: Yeah, indoors. I've learnt how to do my mask now...from next time.

K: Ok, please watch again next time, and please subscribe.

J, T: Please.

K: Thank you very much.

*1,2,4 Couldn't catch these bits.

*3,5 I think thats what is being meant.

[pwnyta]

OK GONNA GRIPE!! Everyone in the world (like 5-6 people) said im allowed to and encouraged me but honestly most of my gripes are Bakugo as a character so I’ll try a little fix it... it will be under the cut.

BUT GRIPES-

The Sports Festival. I loved it... I thought it was great with some exceptions-

Bakugo v Uraraka is the most obvious example of Horikoshi bending characters to make Bakugo seem better than he is. Literally the whole festival no one says shit about the female contestants, its not a plot point, no ones bothered when Tokoyami vs Momo happens but Bakugo fights Uraraka and the whole ass stadium starts running their mouths about Bakugo being kind of an asshole and being mean to Uraraka cuz shes a soft girl even though shes holding her own and Momo panicked and lost in a sad way.

Bakugo attacked Shouto after knocking him out but he doesnt get disqualified. Even if Horikoshi wanted to set up the LoV targeting him he coulda just had them see the footage of Bakugo attacking Todo and his reaction to disqualification and figuring that hed be more willing to turn coat.

The relationships with Endeavor with Shoto and All Might is one of those things that seems like its going to be a set up for something... But never goes anywhere. All Might hadnt spoke to Endeavor for years before that moment when he asks Endeavor for advice on how to train kids because he was impressed with Shoutos performance but Endeavors like ‘I’ll turn him into someone who can surpass you thats why I MADE HIM‘ and All Mights like ‘wtf? wat‘ but it goes no where...

//end Sports festival kinda...

I have so many issues with how Horikoshi built Shouto as a character to be like on the same level as Deku and Bakugo but hes not apart of that group. Their connection as kids is All Might... Shouto should have learned about one for all and the three of them should grow together more.

IDKY Shouto has this past where All Might is his hero, hes one of the big three, but hes excluded.

All im saying is Shouto (and honestly Bakugo) could have used a lot more screen time.

----

During the training camp arc Tokoyami loses control of his Quirk and almost kills a handful of his classmates and is also grabbed by the LoV with Bakugo... and it NEVER COMES UP AGAIN.

Of course the traitor plot line thats ignored for a million years only to be brought up again just to say it never actually mattered... is another one of those ‘This was a good set up for something and you did nothing with it...‘ situation. I still think Kouda is possible. Theres no reason the Principal is an animal... theres no reason why Kouda could be able to pass the entrance exam where Shinso couldnt they basically have the same Quirk. Kouda is quiet and unassuming and he can communicate very easily in secret and could theoretically control Nezu and make him say shit like ‘Theres no war in Ba Sing Se‘ and everyone would just accept it.... But like its been so long why even bother... itd be weird.

Honestly Shinsos whole... thing is also weird. But he was brought back for... like no real pay off. His tragic story doesnt even make sense... people mocking him for having a ‘villains’ Quirk... this is similar to the Bakugo/Uraraka thing. Because thats not a thing... we dont see that literally anywhere else. I mean Shouji mentions that people think his face is a little scary but thats it. There are pros with scary Quirks and even scarier looks, Tokoyami has a literal sentient DARKNESS living in him and a bird face.... but Shinso has problems? Really.

The same can be said about the CRC. Theres a whole hate group youve created to bring up to make Spinner a little more sympathetic but its never been mentioned before or since even though there are characters in the main crew with animal/creature characteristics. Again Tokoyami is right there.

Kirishima is a weird character to have made as prominent as he is because hes got literally no connection to the main story. Shouto shoulda had his screentime. I love Kirishima and his little story with Fatgum and fighting that big bitch was fucking bitchin... but like? Why Kirishima... also whats with Crimson Riot? What does he or Kirishima have to do with anything.

Shouto has the connections. It shoulda been Shouto.

How the fuck did Hawks get away with tricking the LoV with a fake body of Best Jeanist? Why not just have Hawks kill him... it makes more sense and it helps build a case for the corrupt hero society(or at least the higher ups) a little if theyre willing to kill one of their own. I like Best Jeanist but its fucking weird.

And Ive already bitched enough about the corruption of hero society and the lack of evidence story-wise...

I genuinely thought something would go down with Tensei because him being attacked made no sense even though Stain is shown to be very consistent in his belief to the point of endangering himself as shown when he literally went out of his way to save Deku. So why the fuck did he attack Tensei when everything weve seen of the guy is just a good, considerate, selfless hero.

He could have also been used to set up the corruption BUT NOTHING COMES OF IT.

And I mean like some of this stuff could come up later... but its been drawn out so long its weird... a lot of this shit would likely have a continuous direct effect on the story at large if Horikoshi just didnt... ignore it.

NOW BAKUGO. But because everyone knows I hate him Im gonna put my money where my mouth is and try to make him a little better... Cuz hes fucking garbage.

OK First up... Keep him exactly how he is until this moment exactly-

This is the worst moment for me with Bakugo because I thought he looked like that because he was shocked at himself for doing something so fucked up.

Cuz he does want to be a hero and he looks up to All Might.

So after this moment he dials it back a little on the douchebaggery.... hes sorta more distant and still kind of a jerk but but hes more avoiding Deku/conflict until we get to the Sports Festival!

He cant help himself hes competitive and aggressive and the steeper the competition gets the more he falls back into being that hyper aggressive violent person he wants to not be.

The Sports Festival goes as expected and its not until after and he sees himself that he gets uncomfortable again and tries to mellow out again.

Then the practical exam happens and hes paired with Deku but instead of being needlessly antagonistic they actually DO work together... they can bicker and have different ideas of how to win but then get desperate by the end and actually work together cuz THIS-

WAS SO SHITTY. It didnt need to happen. Also earlier when Bakugo is being an asshole in class Aizawa fully acknowledges Bakugo going down a dark path... and does like nothing about it... (You cant really blame him... Baku gets away with everything.)

ANYWAYS. So they reluctantly work together and work well together... Bakugo still feels kinda shitty and annoyed that Deku is at his level..

-

When Bakugo gets snatched by the LoV I think could REALLY be the biggest turning point...

Instead of Bakugo just continuing on like he does maybe this would be a great moment for him to realize that dark path hes been on. The Villains speak to him and theyre like ‘youd be a great villain‘ and its like that scene in Dr Who when Nine flips out and screams at the last Dalek tells it to go and die... and the Dalek goes ‘Youd make a good Dalek‘ which just gut punches him.

Its like that Bakugo thinks about the shits hes been doing after the villains think they can convince him to join them, he thinks about All Might and his life long dream to be a hero and hes disturbed that he COULD be a villain.

They take off the cuffs... he attacks them as per usual but its not with that cocky attitude.

///Bakugo gets saved

He thanks Kirishima... and thanks the others. It can be a cute moment GDI!

The fight between Bakugo and Deku could be Bakugo asking Deku to spar. Thats what he wants. He wants to test the both of them and Deku agrees so when Aizawa gets pissed at them both ITS DESERVED instead of Aizawa punishing Deku for defending himself.

And that can still be the moment Bakugo has his little breakdown and blaming himself for All Mights retirement.

And then just go from there... Bakugos character development coulda been smooth

[zombieratt]

Alright so forewarning this is LONG as FUCK specifically because i came up with this idea in early high school and was just today POSESSEd By the Spirit Of Musical Theatre to put it to paper— er Tumblr.

So without further ado:

DEAR EVAN HANSEN BUT EVAN ISNT A TERRIBLE PERSON AND CONNOR LIVES.

the beginning is the same, canon diverges just after waving through a window.

*this ended up getting written is script format? i also just sorta ignore alana’s whole exsistance bc in this version of the play she’s unnecessary*

In the moments before he talks to Connor evan decides to omit Zoe from his letter, having resolved himself to move on from her. (instead of being a hella creep.)

Connor: “dear Evan Hansen,” what are you writing letters to yourself? *he laughs*

Evan: its, uh, its for my therapist. its just a stupid little assignment that she says is supposed to help me process my feelings or— uh or something

Connor: hm. here. * hands Evan the letter*

Connor: your cast. no one’s signed it.

Evan: uh no. no one has.

Connor: gotta sharpie?

Evan: huh?

Connor: gotta sharpie? im gonna sign it.

Evan: *handing the sharpie to Connor* w- whuh uh why?

Connor: *shrugs* feels right.

Evan: i wish i could do that

Connor: what?

Evan: UH, IMEAN—

Connor: no wait- dude.

Evan: i mean uh, i meant that i wish i could just be, y’know impulsive like that.

Connor: Why Cant you be?

Evan: i uh, my heads pretty messed up, and stuff like that just, makes it worse i guess.

Connor: well theres some thing we have in common— were both fucked up in the head.

*the bell rings*

Evan: oh shoot! i missed the bus—

Connor: i’ll give you a ride.

Evan: are you sure i mean i can walk its not far-

Connor: all the more reason, i probably have to pass it on my way home anyway, cmon.

——

they meet Zoe in the parking lot

Zoe: I have Late practice today

Connor: whatever, gotta passenger.

Zoe: who the fuck would be crazy enough to trust your ability to drive?

Evan *being Brave*: Me Apparently?

Zoe: Uh, Evan Right?

Evan: yeah, uh, yeah.

Zoe *holding her hand out to be shaken*: i’m Zoe, we’ve met though right?

Evan wipes his hand on his shirt and shakes it: yeah, uh, nice to formally meet you, Zoe.

Zoe: i’m off, don’t kill him stoner.

Connor: i wont Princess

Evan breathing heavy: that was,, an eventful ten minutes.

Connor: oh fuck— you cool? or—

Evan: Panic Attack.

Connor: Right, uh

Connor: can you get in the car?

Evan: yeah

*car nonsense*

Connor: Can i start driving or do you want me to wait

Evan: Distractions are good,, Can Uh, Can you Talk about Stuff?

Connor: What stuff!??

Evan: any Stuff!

Connor: Is Zoe okay??

Evan: Sure?!

Connor: Uhh we don’t get along as well as we used to?

we were really close as kids, shes a huge asshole now but *fully venting now*

i kind of miss it you know? having someone to talk to and care about— and i still care about her— but its scary and i always fuck it up! not to mention the fact that our parents hate me— make her see me as some alien and not just a fucked up kid who wants to talk and — (more ranting that i dont feel like writing, but its a whole monologue bro)

Evan: Connor

Connor snaps his mouf shut: yeah

Evan: thanks

Connor: oh that, uh actually helped?

Evan: yeah focusing on your voice and whats real and stuff— it makes a difference.

Neither of them noticed that Connor was just sort of Driving. they end up at the park where in canon Connor commits Sewer-slide.

Evan: i didn’t know there was a park here.

Connor: huh, oh, yeah i guess i just sorta auto piloted, i come here to think.

Evan: About stuff?

Connor: Yeah, Stuff.

*the convo lulls*

Connor: do you have a laptop?

Evan: no, i uh, i left it at home? why?

Connor: give me a second

Connor walks to the car and grabs his back pack out of the back seat

Evan watches Quizzically from the swing-set

Connor pulls out a Sketch Pad and Pen, flipping to a clean page.

Connor: So tell me how to write one of those letters of yours.

Evan: uh, well you start like any other letter- just addressing it to yourself

Connor writing: Dear Connor Murphy,

Evan: and uh, my first one was supposed to be about my ideal summer vacation? since i started in middle school- but you don’t have to—

Connor: thats perfect.

Connor starts to sing for forever,

eventually Evan joins in there is a minor gay moment where they’re holding hands face to face.

the song ends with Connor hugging Evan.

Evan: its- its pretty late.

Connor obviously crying: just— just a couple more minutes.

Evan lets go and grabs Connors sketch book of the ground, closing it and handing it off to him: then how about this, labor day weekend- we actually go.

Connor: what are you talking about?

Evan: being spontaneous?

Connor: o-okay.

and it cuts to black.

theres a small montage here, as the set changes to Connor and Evans bedrooms

sincerely, me is a lament in this context, Connor and Evan are duetting from their respective rooms, writing to themselves.

(the lyrics are completely different and i will not be writing them here because thats too much fucking effort.

but they’re duetting from their bedrooms about making a connection to another person, feeling seen, for the first time. what it felt like and how they really want to keep it up but are afraid of making a mistake and ruining it.

its got some themes of waving thru a window, and a little bit of for forever, but its still largely the same notes just in a different key.)

after wards, Zoe knocks on Connors door to tell him dinner is ready to find him peacefully asleep.

requiem is the same, Zoe sees Connor as Dead to Her instead of actually dead, so some of the wording changes, so and so about how a monster doesn’t deserve peaceful rest etcetera.

school day happens, Connor doesn’t die, but the hot goss is that everyone saw Connor and Evan go home together after school, jared makes a shitty homophobic joke to Evan and Evan kind of tells him off about it. they argue and it culminates in Evan saying “well god forbid I’m friends with someone who isn’t YOU!” or smth like tht and it hits jared right the fuck at home man.

Connor says from the side lines: damn that was pretty hard core dude.

Evan: you have, no idea how long i’ve wanted to do that.

Connor honest to god l a u g h s, theres a number of people who hear it and lose their shit, Zoe being one of them: i have a pretty good idea, wanna get some lunch?

Evan: yeah, sure.

this general routine continues until labor day weekend, when they plan to go on their little escape. theres a short scene of Connor leaving the house with his keys and a backpack.

Connors mom confronts Zoe about his oddly upbeat attitude and hows he’s seemed differently lately Zoe Shrugs but decides to investigate his room.

she finds the letters. the first one is for forever, the theme plays as she reads it frantically, and is signed “Sincerely me (connor murphy)” so she knows its him, i f i could tell her begins but its a real duet between Connor and Zoe and at the end she resolves to try harder to connect to him.

Evan sings disappear to Connor after breaking into a formerly public park, in this context its him confessing that he broke his arm attempting su!c!de. Connor records it, for personal reference.

jared hacks Connors phone and steals the video, posting it to yt, in an effort to ruin their friendship.

Evan and Connor get in a little fight about it, and in the meantime Evan is called to the school to give an assembly because hes a phenomenal speaker and Disappear got like 1000000 views over night.

Zoe and Connor bond a little bit in a short scene before the assembly

Zoe: wheres Evan what happened?

Connor: Kleinman Did!

Zoe: what?

Connor: Why Do you care?

Zoe: because! you look happy around him!

Connor: i, i do?

Zoe: yeah? he could tell the worst joke ever written and you’d crack up. i haven’t heard you laugh like that in years Connor, maybe ever.

Connor: oh.

Zoe: Come back inside?

Connor: y, Yeah.

they all perform You Will Be Found together.

end act 1.

(no more dialogue from here i got tired)

to break in a glove is Connor’s dad trying to reconnect with him, it goes mediocrely, but Connor feels like hes being seen by his dad for the first time in years. its said in metaphors, but this is Connors dads way of saying that if Connor is willing to put in the work, so is he. they hug at the end, things are looking up. some talk of therapy is sprinkiled in the dialogue as they walk of stage together.

Only Us is Evan and Connor saying that they saved each other. its loosely romantic, as its a love song, but they don’t out right say that they’re in love or anything, they don’t know if theyre ready for that. its a promise. the song ends with Connor finally apologizing for pushing Evan over at the beginning of the show.

good for you is sung by jared only, as a power ballad, about losing people you didn’t treasure. its his attempt at an apology, but it ultimately fails, since jared is unable to take responsibility for his own actions. this is where jared and Evan go their separate ways.

Evan’s mom comforts him, as he sings words fail, which is about specifically jared, and how their rocky friendship is ruined and Evan pegs himself as the cause, instead of parents or perfect girl he uses metaphors that apply to best friends— maybe more. and talks about how he didn’t try, he was happy so he ignored that jared was hurting, and how that was really shitty of him. but instead of it being a generally somber song the end is lighter, because Connor is there— waving through his front window.

Evans mom sings So Big/So Small as Evan steps out the front door to embrace Connor and they mime talking about jared, hug and take hands. the house moves off stage in preparation for the finale.

Connor and Evan open the finale saying each others names, and sing it together as the test of the cast (minus jared) joins in, Evans mom taking his hand and Zoe Taking Connors, Evans mom the Murphys and Zoe break off to the back where Evan and Connor finish the final “all i see is sky for forever” while looking into each others eyes, and finish the musical by embracing (maybe kissing if thats ur jam).